#I STARTED IT LAST FUCKING MAY
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Hero of the Deep 🌊🐟
#jrwi#jrwi fanart#gillion tidestrider#jrwi riptide#hades game#hades 2#hades fanart#THIS TOOK ME. WAY TOO LONG TO MAKE#I STARTED IT LAST FUCKING MAY#also ive never actually played hades lmao sorry if the textbox is wrong
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Average university experience
#based on real life events#don't do this btw it has horrible long lasting consequences.#finals may be killing you but keep that routine up and they /might actually/ end you#last year I had the idea of a uni au which stayed as various notes. drawings and a few drafts#well I have finally started to work on it recently to flesh it out better#I'm planning to stick to the plan of it being a fun thingy to have. mostly just to put them in Uni Situations yk yk#it's the ultimate projection au for a myriad of reasons. putting vash in my major and ww in one of my most dreaded classes but actually mak#him enjoy it will be therapeutic to me in soooo many ways. loved the class. fuck the teacher tho. ww won't go through the same#however he will be cursed with Knives so wtv#trigun#vash the stampede#trigun stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#vashwood#trigun fanart#vash#wolfwood#nicholas trigun#lenssi draws#Trigun Uni! AU
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cheesy af but pussydrunk Vi accidentally mentioning marriage?
she... she would tho.
so painfully 18+, mndi, merry xmas to the gays and only the gays
just fucking you slow, after pulling a good few orgasms out of you already with her mouth and her fingers, after you've also made her eyes roll back with nothing but your tongue on her clit, your fingers reaching up to tug on her pierced nipples, the buds made that much more sensitive by the metal rods, her mind caught somewhere between her lips and the high cap of the ceiling in your dorm, the winter sun pale and timid, peering behind a sheaf of clouds, shining through the half-drawn blinds.
"fuck, sweet girl -- feel so good -- mmm --" she mumbles, not all that sure what she's even saying anymore, her hips rocking against you of it's own accord, her thumb pushed against the pad of your tongue as you moan around her finger, spit slicking across your lips.
"vi -- vi -- please, please, please --" you groan, hips bucking up weakly even as she rucks down over you, her breath breaking at the catch of your oversensitive clits rubbing against one another. she squeezes out a breath, frowning down at the mess of slick skin and reddening skin at the place where both your bodies connect, her mind a blissed out smear of want and love and not much else.
"feel so good, pretty, wanna make you cum again -- yeah? you want that?" she asks, hooking one of your legs over her shoulder, you tossing your head back into the sheets, fingers scrabbling at her thighs as she adjusts her angle and your cunts are slotting against each other in just the right way.
"wanna make you mine -- you mine, pretty girl? holy fuck --" and she's rambling, she knows she's rambling, the words just pouring from her before she has the chance to think them through, "all mine -- mmngh -- gonna be mine forever? yeah? god fuck, wanna fuck this pussy for the rest of my life -- you want that, pretty? wanna be mine forever? want me to wife you up? fuck yeah -- that'd be nice wouldn't it?"
you keen, the sound going straight to her clit as she gasps, and then you're cumming too, hard and fast, gushing against her, the peak of it so sudden she doesn't quite know what to do, but its so hot watching you come undone like this that it has her gasping a second later, her high hitting just has hard, her fingers digging into your thigh as she rides her her orgasm against you, even though you're oversensitive and twitching, she holds your hips, rocking into you till you're squirming, pushing weakly at her arms.
"holy shit vi..." you breathe, fighting to catch your breath.
vi chuckles, collapsing down next to you, an arm thrown casually over your middle as you cuddle in next to her.
after a few seconds you turn.
"d-did you mean it?"
"mean what, pretty girl?" she asks, turning slightly, her eyes still glazed out and dark, her cheeks bright with the glow of her recent orgasm. you lick your lips; she's so, so beautiful like this, fucked out and messy, and a little lovesick as she looks over your face.
"when you..." you gulp, "when you said you... wanted me to be yours... forever...?"
vi blinks at you for a few seconds before her pink cheeks stain an even darker shade of damson.
"holy fuck -- i -- sorry, i didn't know i said that out loud -- i didn't mean to --" she scrambles up, shaking her head. you chase her up, tugging on her arms.
"no, no! it's -- i mean -- i didn't mind -- i just --" you swallow, licking at your suddenly dry lips, "did you... did you really mean it?"
"i -- i don't wanna make you feel uncomfortable or anything but..." vi peers at you, almost shy as she twists her fingers in her lap, the blush now spreading down her neck into her chest and back. you bite back a giggle as you pillow your cheek on her shoulder.
"it... it doesn't make me uncomfy, i just... i just wanna know if you meant it."
vi licks her lips, glancing back at you.
"i-if i meant it... would you... would you say yes?"
you chew on the inside of your cheek, your eyes flickering up to meet hers.
a beat of silence passes between you before you smile, slow and indulgent.
"yeah. yeah... i would."
vi's expression breaks into shock, and then unbridled ecstasy. she stares at you, her eyes so wide they almost look like dinner plate, before she's dragging you forward into her lap, kissing you so hard you have to thump your fists against her chest to remind her to let you go.
"i -- sorry -- fuck -- that was -- i -- you -- god i love you so much, you know that?" she asks, cupping your cheeks and pressing her forehead to yours.
you laugh, toppling into her, the pair of you still naked, but the room is bubbling over with warmth.
"yeah, i know. i love you too, vi."
vi laughs, nodding, before she traces both thumbs along your cheeks and tilts your face up towards hers again.
"hey pretty girl... tell me again..."
you let out a shy little giggle, but vi holds you fast. her eyes soft on yours.
"will you marry me?"
you nod, your cheeks still squished between her palms, but your own hands find their way to her wrists as you turn to press a soft kiss to the pad of her hand.
"yes, vi. yes, i will."
#⛈ monsoon season#♨ steamy#arcane#vi x reader#arcane x reader#vi smut#arcane smut#vi x you#arcane x you#lesbian#wlw smut#wlw fanfic#lesbian smut#vi arcane x reader#vi fanfic#vi fluff#arcane fluff#HAPPY HOLIDAYS ALL MY VI OBSESSED BABES#HERE IS VI PROPOSING IN A SMEX INDUCED HIGH LMFAO#and yes. this is in my college vi verse#college roomate!vi x reader#bc like i can so see her doing this during ur last semester right like#winter sem right before ur about to graduate in may of the following year#the both of you choosing to stay in ur apt over the winter for idk why but u do#cuddling for warmth and just.... once break starts shed be fucking INSATIABLE teLL ME SHE WOULDN'T BE#(she would)#smex in the morning smex the afternoon smex at night before you guys go to bed#and vi would get so pvssydrunk cause like shes the kinda person who gets more turned on the more emotionally connected u guys are right#cause i feel like being kinda sorta touch starved thats just who she is as a person i fear#uh anyway. there's sesbian lex and also tr i b b in g so :) ENJOY????
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You know what I love about the kiss? How fucking joyful it was. It was so light and so happy and so freeing.
The confession was so heavy and came at the last possible moment. Dorian was in his lower register, careful and eloquent. Orym had folded in on himself, shy and quiet. They have the weight of the world in their shoulders and they just needed a moment alone together. To say I love you. To let the other know. It all hinged on the moment before there was no going back.
But this. The kiss. It was after laughter and wedding planning and appreciating little things like lavender honey. Everyone was smiling. Everyone was feeling good. For whatever reason it didn't feel hopeless then. In that moment futures existed. Tomorrows existed. And Orym had one. Orym had a future and a tomorrow in Dorian.
Orym was so moved by all the happiness in the air that he confidently took Dorian by the hand to bring him out to the hall, told, then asked, him he was going to kiss him. All of Orym's fears melt away for ten whole seconds. Dorian stuttered and fumbled his words and kissed him back.
It was so cute. It was so joyous.
You know what it reminds me of? The stolen century. After Lup and Barry fall in love over years and years and they play this beautiful duet together. They lock eyes and smile at each other and steal away, running up the valley, away from it all. That moment of holding each other and just keep on not letting go.
The unrelenting giddiness of it all. The excitement. The glee. The promise of future. Wanting a future. Especially if it's together.
#silver sending stones#orym of the air ashari#dorian storm#cr spoilers#dorym#im crying a lot#lol my phone autocorrected a bit into a lot and like#yeah ill keep it#anyways.#theyre very soft#theyre very sweet#dorian's “ooooh shit yes��� is the cutest thing?#and oryms “im gonna kiss you WAIT may i kiss you” is ehajrbkwjd#dont get me started on “oh i want”#DONT GET ME STARTED ON OH I WANT#because that has also done something to me#i know dorym has been very#first love (◕ᴗ◕✿)#inexperienced (◕ᴗ◕✿)#out of practice (◕ᴗ◕✿)#but the enthusiasm in his voice.#the “im ready to start my life” of it all#im ready to start my life with you#if i didnt already make an edit with dorian and dust & ashes id fucking make it now#someone please ask me about dorian and pierre parallels im dying over here#because dorian storm signing thats last “im ready” because he is ready to love and be loved#im sick#im making myself sick#i love them so much#im going to cry
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speaking of costume/makeup design i love that we go from wade wearing a toupee (at his own birthday party no less) as his way of trying to fit in in any way he can still control, to just him as himself!! which mirrors his character arc from needing to feel accepted or like he matters to other people to having self-acceptance and assurance in his own intrinsic worth <3
also *eye twitch* the white shirt representing rebirth and renewal. the cardigan representing comfort and homeliness as compared to a windbreaker reminiscent of a shield to block out the elements. both worn to keep warm but in different ways
#user: gossippool 😝#gossippool metas#i say “speaking of” as if i'm directly continuing a conversation and not as if my last and only costume meta was weeks ago#but anyway!#i support wade wearing wigs (what in the alliteration) but only if he's doing it for his own enjoyment! period#and yes granted he did just come from outside. but it's the fact that he felt like he had to wear the toupee outside in the first place oka#this may just be me trying to explain his absolutely fucking hideous look at the start honestly#because bestie what are those layers.#deadpool & wolverine#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool#wade wilson
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HAPPY NEWONDERHOY YEAR 🍡
#its still jan 1st somewhere . right#HAPPY NEW YEAR. HAPPY NEW YURI#project sekai#pjsk#an shiraishi#prsk#tsukasa tenma#proseka#Hatsune amiky acolorful Stage[FOGHORN]#inknow i csnt write kanji OK stroke order has me fucked up#redraw of last years to thank them both for arriving with 30k gems to spare vut i [cough] i [wheeze]#i kind of think last years was. more slayful...[throws a smokebomb and when it clears im laying unconscious on the ground]#OK last year i remember literally drawing that for like 13 hours snd the anstomy isnt goo so whatevvrr#my life is so jover january 10th btw EMU. {EMU. EMU. EMU#WAAAAH#college starts that week but heh.. luckily my class ends before the event. here we go again#and then nenesnlim and the ruis lim and then (redacted) right after and then peace. and then CORALINTHHEBIX AND WEDDIGN EMU ANDPANDMONIUM A#and i have miku expo and a convention in may.. ehhhahe#im finish um one cosplay hopefilyl for cny but thenother ummm stipid fuckifng tdukasa maybe ill finish it for showtime event mahbe not#i hate her. to the shredder#EMU. oooh emu. Ok sorry goodnight
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MHA didn't create some miracle way of helping others. It was never promised to be this way. And when it came to villains...
Spoilers for manga all the way to chapter 423.
The only way to get anything in life in MHA was to be born "normal" like everyone else and that way of thinking never left Izuku with Toga getting the same treatment she did before from everyone from her family to her "normal" classmates. It was Ochako who helped Toga even if just a little by lifting the weight of all the feelings that Toga had.
She couldn't save Toga the way one could save a civilian by saving them from harm. If it worked that way Dabi would've saved Toga even before Ochako could apologize for failing to notice Toga. She was so lazer focused on saving everyone else, that she was just another villain to stop, not a human.
Even if by the end of it Ochako helped Toga to deal with her grief, acceptance as it was wasn't something possible when a quirk makes you want to drink someone's blood from jealousy.
We got a bittersweet ending with Toga, in which she probably died from blood loss just like her double did in MVA. If it wasn't for Twice she would've died back then.
Giving away her blood for Ochako wasn't a redemption or a way to save Toga in the end, more as it was her being true to herself until the very end.
Just like Twice chose to stay with the League even if Hawks offered him a way to survive that battle. He refused and died protecting his friends who accepted him instead of choosing to betray them and accept Hawks' offer.
After Twice's death... It was a matter of time that more 'active' LoV members would join him as well. As sad as it is, we now can return to Izuku.
Who, after his time OFA-AFO quirk space, now wanted to help a "crying boy" he saw in Tenko just as before with Katsuki in chapter 1. He didn't forgive Tomura and didn't excuse the way he chose to solve his problems.
It didn't mean that Tomura would survive in their battle, even if Izuku didn't see killing others as a way to solve problems. He didn't understand Tomura, but he still wanted to try, and try he did.
The rest of this post was nothing more than a contextual prologue to understand that it's not the first time a hero failed to save a villain and in Twice's case we know that he died and his death was the reason Toga started thinking about her own possible death and Dabi finally revealed himself as Toya.
The goal of saving a "crying boy" never was an end-goal for Izuku in the Final arc, since helping Tomura deal with his feelings just left him hollow with a goal that clashed with Izuku's. As being a hero for villains meant destroying the world for them to help them live freely.
But that was before AFO resurfaced.
Sadly after that Tomura who was talking about making his own choices for a while now stopped doing that. Even if he still had a goal of helping villains and only villains, Tomura was almost gone. And his goals were now unreachable.
Izuku helped Nana who in turn kept Tomura from fading away entirely. In MHA there were countless situations where Izuku's help affected people by helping a different person to keep hope, All-Might being the first one and Nana being the last one at the moment.
Hollow after Izuku helped him to get rid of his hatred Tomura could do the only thing he did - accept the situation as it was.
Accepting AFO as his Sensei, accepting Stain's ideals and Overhaul's deal was the way he solved his problems. Just like Izuku had a problem of understanding something outside of his norm, Tomura was accepting too many things, which lead to his downfall after accepting AFO's quirk.
Just like Twice could've given up everything that he had for his friends so did Tomura.
With Izuku helping as much as he could let Tomura to finally rest as he wasn't really living ever since waking up in the hospital. With his body now affected by AFO's wishes instead of his own until the end.
In a way Izuku didn't succeed in his wish for Tomura to stop ever since PLF war arc. As he "kept fighting to destroy" no matter how hard Izuku tried to stop him.
The only thing he succeeded in was changing Tomura's mind about himself, instead of viewing himself as a monster he accepted that he was a human just like Izuku said. A "crying boy" who couldn't really destroy Izuku's hands in the end.
For a group of Villains who weren't supposed to get profiles of their own at the start of the series, League is slowly fading as the most memorable group that there was in MHA, getting backstories, their own Villain themed arc all the while being as human as anyone else.
As sad as their story is they were not "unlucky", they didn't need a happy false ending where they would need to change to be normal - they chose to live this way and they lived it to it's fullest.
#bnha#bnha manga spoilers#bnha analysis#league of villains#shigaraki tomura#tenko shimura#toga himiko#mha twice#midoriya izuku#ochako uraraka#todoroki touya#dabi#spinner#shuichi iguchi#not art#While writing this I've been rewriting it time and time again#But by the end of it I just started crying because god... I didn't want them to end like this#Also I finally found the tracks that connect to the scene of Twice's death#Which may or may not have been a reason I started crying#Anyway the reason I wrote this was as simple as that - I read Twitter got sad and needed some way to cope#Because I'm getting sick from all 'oh they'll survive' yes HEROES might survive all of this VILLAINS would not#Magne died Twice died wnd Kurogiri literally became a cloud in the sky#I do hope that Spinner would be at least alive because leaving Mr. Compress alone with no sushi too is just too cruel#While writing this I suddenly found myself so frustrated with Izuku that my last tries to write this ended in a trashcan instead#it's so fucked up#To be a LoV stan and see how Class 1-A is getting the best ending they can with so much hope while LoV is... Dead :(#this is a mess
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i think we need to remember that sexuality and labels mean something different to everyone. what lesbian means for me is different for others. i identify as a lesbian but finn wolfhard is fucking gorgeous and i giggle a bit watching kit connor, and jake johnson being all grumpy as nick miller does something to me. but i also can confidently say that i will never date a man. i absolutely don’t want to. like some men are fucking gorgeous and i can totally appreciate that and still have no interest in dating men and identify as a lesbian. and like, that’s ok. but also for some people maybe they feel like that but identity as bisexual. and that’s totally fine because it’s their fucking decision how they choose to identify. and it’s the same for gender identity. just because someone presents femme or masc doesn’t mean they follow that binary. a trans masc can present feminine. a non-binary person can present however the fuck they want and they’re still fucking non binary. the whole point of the queer community is acceptance and defying labels and being just who we want to be. if you’re trying to push labels as a queer person on another queer person it’s so hypocritical. let people live their lives, whether they choose to label themselves or not and whether their labels make sense or are the same way you think of labels. it’s not about you. it’s about them. let people live.
#wow that was a rant#my coming out was such a process#i came out as bi my junior year#and realized that wasn’t right my senior year and started identifying as queer#and i only just started being comfortable calling myself lesbian this last summer#and even now have just been coming to terms with being allowed to find some men attractive and still being valid as a lesbian#(…this may have started because i saw a gorgeous picture of finn wolfhard and had some feelings about it)#lesbian pride#here and queer#queer pride#pride#lgbtqai#lgbtq#lgbtq community#lgbt pride#lesbian#queer#fuck labels#identity how you fucking want#or don’t at all#just be a mystical being
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sleepless nights
#art#digital art#fanart#one piece#sanji#i uh. have been having a bit of insomnia the last week. sucks:/#and it made me think about sanji's sleeping habits and the fact he reportedly only gets 5h of sleep a night#i imagine that just like me he has a hard time quieting his mind:/#(and i may draw a pt 2 cuz i have an idea for it but i have an essay due tomorrow that i haven't even fucking started lol#due to the...u know... aforementioned insomnia problems...im just tired y'all#anyway i'll stop yapping now
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You know what, fuck it, I have to speak my truth! (this is gonna be a rant, so anyone who actually likes assassin's creed revelations and/or the secret crusade, be warned or maybe don't read this at all)
remember how altaïr talks to king richard at the end of ac1, and richard is like "[humans] come into the world kicking and screaming, violent and unstable. it is what we are. we cannot help ourselves."? and how altaïr answers "no. we are what we choose to be." and how that ACTUALLY has meaning bc he himself was "violent and unstable" at the beginning of the game but he has learned and is now CHOOSING to be a better person who cares about others and humanity at large? remember how his calmness and gentleness was something that he ACQUIRED over the course of the story?
and remember how in revelations they then suddenly had a PRE-AC1 altaïr say about the first of his targets "no man should pass from this world without knowing some kindness." and be all wise and calm and collected during a nice little chat with al mualim, who suddenly acts all fatherly? (like, this is suddenly supposed to be a positive relationship? what??)
also, during the confession the target says to altair: "you put too much faith in the hearts of men, altaïr. [...] humans are weak, base, and petty." and altaïr answers: "no. our creed is evidence to the contrary." KJASJFJDKL???? like, it’s almost insulting how close this exchange is to the one with richard. you know, the one that was actually earned after a whole game of character development. like WTF??? cool congrats now that development means nothing. like, apparently that was just altaïr reverting BACK to being the exemplary assassin who understands and believes in the creed that he was apparently just born as. (i also hate how having a young inexperienced altaïr saying this implies that altaïr's faith in humanity is a sign of naivete instead of a sign of the wisdom he has gained after being confronted with counter arguments for a whole game, and also something that distinguishes the assassins from the templars who use humanity's supposed wickedness to justify controlling them like in AC1, but whatever)
altaïr’s development in AC1 mattered BECAUSE he is not NATURALLY a good person, it actually said something about humanity's capacity for both bad AND good and how humans don't have to be forced to be good through mind control bc they can by their own free will choose to be better when taught how and when allowed the freedom to grow. but no. apparently altaïr has just always been calm, wise and gentle. and he just sort of forgot about that during AC1 bc…. ? bc of adha?? bc of abbas???
oh don’t get me started on the whole abbas thing. (it doesnt even make sense that abbas is so hung up about his father and "his family’s honor", like what about the whole point of al mualim not allowing parents to be close to their children bc it would make them weak? like, my dude, you’re not supposed to HAVE any family aside from the brotherhood)
they used the throwaway character that had like 5 lines and made him into altaïr’s main antagonist in revelations… like, abbas wasn’t supposed to be this ONE dude who had personal beef with altaïr, he was just supposed to show how while altaïr’s revered by many, a lot of his brothers also hate him, bc 1) altaïr is a shitty person at this point and 2) bc there’s no real feeling of community and family in this version of the brotherhood, but just a pervasive sense of competition and jealousy — these assassins don’t care about their goal of safeguarding humanity bc they’re too hung up on petty squabbles and divided by rivalries (you know, the things that made malik hate altaïr even before solomon’s temple and that he overcomes in the end which enables him to forgive and to reconcile with altaïr so they can work together and stop al mualim? (you ever just think about "we are one. as we share the glory of our victories, so too should we share the pain of our defeat. in this way we grow closer. we grow stronger." and cry? bc i do. all the time. malik, the man that you are))
and now abbas is altaïr’s childhood best friend turned lifelong enemy?? like, bowden bent over backwards to come up with an explanation for why altaïr is an arrogant ass at the beginning of AC1, when the explanation is right there: he was raised to kill without asking questions and was constantly praised for how good he is at murder, which resulted in him becoming arrogant and disregarding human life. like, it doesn’t have to be some shakespearean family feud type shit. and guess what, this "simple" explanation actually plays into the story’s themes, who’da thunk!
(like, abbas might not have been a "fleshed out" character in AC1, but he had a specific function and now that function is gone. mr bowden, mr mcdevitt, you know characters are allowed to simply exist to tell us something about their worlds and the systems they live in and sometimes that’s more important and also more interesting than having every single character have a detailed backstory to explain all their behaviors, right?)
with all of this revelations loses all nuance in regards to the levantine brotherhood and also the creed in general. like, altaïr being a master assassin at the beginning despite being a terrible person and not actually understanding the creed is a criticism of the brotherhood and the creed itself. like, it said something about the order that someone like altaïr was able to get that high in rank, simply bc he's good at killing, which also tells us what is considered important in the al mualim era assassin order. when you make altaïr’s arrogance the result of his personal conflicts instead of how we was raised by a brotherhood that only valued one's ability to kill, you lose that characterization of the assassin order itself!
and by suddenly making al mualim a semi good "father figure" you also downplay his manipulation of not only altaïr but all those under his care. (altaïr says something about al mualim being "as a father" to him exactly twice in the codex, but he doesn’t mean by that that he WAS a father to him, what he means is that he was the CLOSEST THING he had bc HE DID NOT HAVE PARENTS, not because his mother died in childbirth and his father was executed when he was young btw, BUT BECAUSE IT WASN’T ALLOWED, like his parents actually lived but weren’t allowed to be close to him, he says he came to view al mualim’s "weak and dishonest" love as enough and even better BECAUSE HE HAD NOTHING ELSE, BECAUSE AL MUALIM ISOLATED HIS ASSASSINS FROM THEIR FAMILIES. al mualim "loved" him bc he was good at killing people for him! hm, i wonder if this could be trying to say anything about cults and indoctrination and the inherent contradiction in fighting for peace and free will by taking children away from their parents and raising them to become killers?? like, altaïr wasn't ~the special orphan boy~ taken in by al mualim bc his father died a hero's death, it was "the way of the order" to have al mualim be the closest thing to a parental figure for everyone to ensure absolute loyalty! altaïr saying al mualim was like his father is not supposed to make you go "oh, he must have actually been a good guy for altaïr to consider him a father", it should make you go "oh that's kinda fucked up that he considers the dude who made him into a killing machine and who manipulated him a sort of father figure"!)
and then in revelations they suddenly portray that relationship as positive and healthy??? like, it would be one thing to give it some nuance by delving into the psychology behind al mualim’s "love" and maybe showing how al mualim did care about altair in a complicated, fraught sort of way (like, you know, there’s a lot of interesting things you could say about al mualim at several points addressing altaïr as "my child" in AC1 and how that parallels Garnier referring to the people he drugged and abused as his "children", and what that says about how the templars view the people who they say they want to save and in whose best interests they supposedly act (in any case, al mualim doesn’t use that phrase because he has any real parental feelings but rather to patronize and to invalidate any objections, like in a "mother knows best" way))
but they even fucking DARE to parallel that relationship with that of altaïr and darim in revelations, by having the reflection in the puddle of darim hugging altaïr showing altaïr hugging al mualim…. like their relationship wasn’t inherently abusive but just tragically cut short because al mualim was just "corrupted by the apple"… like WHAT???? so it’s not the very real problems like grooming, manipulation and indoctrination and the hierarchical structure of the brotherhood itself (all of which are antithetical to the assassin ideology), it was just the evil apple all along. great. that’s DEFINITELY a lot more interesting.
god im sorry i really dont want to spread negativity but this is driving me INSANE. like, somebody please tell me im not crazy bc i feel like somehow most of the fandom is in agreement that revelations and the secret crusade have better storytelling and characterization than ac1.
SPEAKING OF WHICH, can we talk about how, even IF we completely ignore AC1 and treat revelations altaïr as his own character…. the narrative still doesn’t really work?
basically, the whole point of his story in rev is that "he gave his whole life to the brotherhood", this obsession led to him not using his time with his family which has him ending up dying alone in a dark library and this in turn makes ezio reevaluate his life choices…. except. he doesn’t? neglect? his family? or whatever? like, his devotion to the assassins is sort of painted as this tragic flaw that leads to a lonely death bc it supposedly comes at the cost of his family, but… his wife has joined the assassins, (at least) one of his sons is in the brotherhood and even when he goes to protect the assassins against the mongols, he takes his family with him (except for the son who stays behind bc he has a family of his own and who, ironically, ends up dying bc of that)… like, you can’t describe altaïr as a good husband and father in the database and have his son tell him that "everything that is good in me began with you, father" when they say goodbye, and then want to make us believe that he put his family behind the brotherhood and that that is a character flaw that leads to his tragedy.
because you HAVE to have a character’s tragedy be the result of a character flaw. like. that is how tragedies work. otherwise it just becomes tragedy for the sake of tragedy which is… boring bc it has no purpose. and we know it is SUPPOSED to have purpose bc ezIO FUCKING QUITS BEING AN ASSASSIN AFTER WITNESSING IT!
it’s like they want to have their cake and eat it, too — they didn’t want to actually make altaïr a bad husband/father, but still wanted to make his life a tragedy where he loses his family which is why instead they outsource all responsibility to abbas who now has to be the reason for ALL the deaths.
like, they try to make at least maria’s death kind of sort of the result of altaïr’s rashness or whatever but like… these guys KILLED THEIR SON and TOLD HIM THAT ALTAÏR HAD ORDERED HIS DEATH. like, altaïr losing it in response to that is not rash, it’s fucking logical and justified! if anything the scene made me angry at maria for trying to stop him. like, GIRL, he was YOUR son too??? but god forbid we give female characters actual real emotions, she has to fill the role of "voice of reason who dies for altaïr’s man pain" i fucking guess.
like, it’s this weird mix where his tragedy is simultaneously painted as his own fault but also not really bc abbas is the one responsible for all the shit that happens. it just… it just doesn’t really go together.
the only way to make his story make sense narratively and to give it actual purpose is by looking at it in the context of ezio’s story, bc the things he sees in altaïr’s memories are supposed to be a revelation (ha!) to ezio specifically. and i guess that’s maybe the crux of it all — altaïr’s story in revelations was conceived of first and foremost to support ezio’s story and development. which is probably also why many people maybe don’t notice bc, having skipped ac1 and started with ac2, the majority of people mostly care only about ezio and only really appreciate altaïr’s story in as far as it serves to push ezio forward. (tho i’ve also seen a few people say that ezio is also written kind of weird in rev, but i’ve never really been an ezio girly myself so i can’t speak to the truth of that)
like, altaïr dying alone in the library doesn’t really have to make sense for his character, i guess, bc it’s only really supposed to be a cautionary tale for ezio.
so, i guess, for once, they actually had a MAN dying for another man’s character development, which is pretty woke actually. ubisoft, i take everything back jksdsfjhgdsahfhsdhfghfdsgjhsdgjh
#assassins creed#ac1#altair ibn la'ahad#malik al-sayf#ezio auditore#asscreed#rant#long post#this is killing me#i even started rereading the secret crusade bc i thought maybe i remember it being worse than it is#but honestly its the opposite#even just the fact that in the secret crusade altair always says some last sentence after his targets' confessions#has me so irrationally angry aksjdfh#like over sibrands body he says something like 'may death be merciful' or something#like? did they want that to be like requiescat in pace or something???#like aside from the fact that altair WOULD NOT FUCKING SAY THESE THINGS#it also just destroys the tension built up by the target's last words#like... i do think it was very much on purpose that the target always had the last word in the confessions#sigh whatever its just a stupid video game from over 15 years ago who cares#(me. i care. unfortunately. i wish i didn't. send help please.)#also the fact that bowden just completely fucked up arabic naming conventions with the whole “umar/darim ibn la'ahad” thing#(which is kind of an achievement considering that wasn't too great in ac1 to begin with)#tho bc of that they kind of inadvertantly ended up implying that roshan is altairs ancestor which i actually kind of like lol#anyways sorry for this giant wall of text#this is probably (definitely) the longest post i've ever made lmsadjf#but i do think i've gotten most of it off my chest.... maybe#maybe ill add stuff if i come across something else that makes me angry lol#sorry i know i promised an essay and instead delivered a rant#i just dont think i have the capacity to actually structure my thoughts any better kajdsf
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Me: Trans masc/trans man butches are sacred and deserve a space in the sapphic community as much as any other butch Also me: Can I please have a single post on this site about butches that refer to me, a butch, as a girl? As a treat? I really don't like being called a boy
#my first non-relationship text post in a hot minute#i may get cooked for this but idgaf#i keep coming across so many good posts but then they're like “boy” and my “firmly a woman” ass is unhappy#like i didn't spend the last 6.5 years transitioning and reclaiming my masculinity in butchness to have other lesbians call me a fucking bo#for real i do think there is space for all of us and i have no beef with trans masc butches (my roomie is one ffs)#but it's starting to feel like for a lot of the lesbians here butch = boy and that's just. not true?#like the immediate assumption of he/him pronouns. use of “boy” and “cock”. etc. it's beginning to feel well... gender essentialist?#i may make a significantly longer post about this eventually that totally won't get me in trouble with the community#this is a topic that needs it's space but i had to get the initial “GAH” out of my system#bite me#butch#butch lesbian#lesbian#trans lesbian
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something something having a new hyperfixation and now having several new WIPs about it AND just starting to draw certain characters from it just yesterday uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh yeah-
#something something UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I fell into the lifesmp hole#and so now I'm very attached to Scar as a character because man. Man he's got me so fucked up#also that headshot reference is very much referenced from a drawing of Ru's that the public has not seen cause I am feral over it- it was a#very good starting point of how I wanted to draw Scar and like yeah#am I saying these are 3rd life designs? I mean they're on my 3rd life doodle page and Scar definitely has a lilac soooooo#WHICH GOD LILAC SYMBOLISM IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO#anywho I can be normal I swear#also vaguely Flower husbands because Jay may have gotten me a little attached to them slightly#just wait til I draw Tango and flood you all with Flower Ranchers it'll be over for everyone#the minute I draw more scar I think it'll be over for everyone#dangthatsalongname#jimmy solidarity#solidaritygaming#goodtimeswithscar#fanart#life series#life smp#traffic smp#trafficblr#should I technically be drawing Scar shirtless? Yeah but I did not wanna deal with muscles for a base reference drawing#so like hey he gets a shirt for the moment- If I draw any canon 3rd life stuff I'll draw him shirtless#I'm also watching Bdubs's pov of the Life series because one of my friends recommended it and like god he's a little chaotic#good on him! He tried to fight a wither with Etho in last life! And died from falling! Again! This man can not stop dying from falling#someone needs to make sure he has a water bucket in his inventory at all times because he died by falling in 3rd life and died by it in las#life so if he dies by falling in double life I'll lose it#also I just like the idea of Jimmy in Overalls no one can stop me from drawing him with them okay okay#I dedicate these doodles to Ru Hatt and Jay because they have to share in my insanity of me losing my mind over this silly series#Madi's art :>#OKAY I'M STOPPING NOW I GOTTA PUT THE LAPTOP AWAY
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what comes after me?
#tumblr about to give me a fucking stroke with the photo quality strangulation#my fucking god be so for real here dude#okay well anyway i thought i'd posted ''all'' my nfattne photos i stfg but unless they're extremely well hidden or tumblr has randomly--#--deleted a bunch of posts then i only ever made three photo posts?#last summer was a fucking fever dream tbf. so many things happening within a very small time frame#i'd barely returned home from my luke adventures in may and kinda recovered from that before ashton started acting up#and then before i knew it i was off to LA and the rest of the year just passed in a blurry haze i stfg#point is that ig i lost my brain somewhere along the way and therefore forgot to post more luke photos#idk how many more i have that are worth sharing but. there should be some. i think#luke hemmings#pic#anna takes photos#nfattne#nfattne philly
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Omg hi Ms. Yellow Caballero big fan of your work <3 For real though, I'm really excited that your sharing the Weekenders, it was a joy to read and I'm bongocat-ing now that others also get the privilege to read it as well.
Referencing your tags, would you please elaborate of ableism in fandom and, like you said, how fandom treats characters with unpalatable disabilities?
Hi Ms. Bud Lite I'm a big fan of you <3
TL;DR A fear of writing characters of highly marginalized identities shields you from criticism and discomfort, but it's actively stigmatizing to people of these identities and as a writer you really need to get over yourself and write The Icky People.
I guess I'll come out swinging on this one and say that fandom doesn't like severe mental illness. (As a note, when I say severe mental illness (SMI) I mean illnesses such as psychotic disorders, bipolar disorder, substance use disorders, personality disorders, etc)
Obviously, nobody likes people w/SMI. It's just insanely egregious in fandom to me, since fanfic writers absolutely love writing characters or HC characters with depression, anxiety, or a specific variety of PTSD That Isn't Scary. People actively reject any character HCs for a SMI. When people write a character with SMI, they nicely downplay it, ignore it, substitute it for a disorder they like better, or rewrite it. It's completely untolerated, in both headcanons and in fanfiction, and every time I bring it up I always get the most interesting reasons why somebody couldn't possibly acknowledge a character's SMI in their writing. I've heard all of these:
"I don't know enough about the disorder to write it accurately." Do research.
"I'm not X, so I can't really depict it." You probably aren't a cis white man, but you depict those guys just fine.
"It feels insulting to the character." There is no shame in having a SMI.
"I can't understand what it's like, so it's better to be cautious and avoid giving characters stigmatized identities." There are LOTS of experiences that you'll never understand because you've never had them - you just don't want to write anything you're uncomfortable with. People with SMI make you uncomfortable, and you don't want to write anything that makes you feel uncomfortable, or think of a comfort character in an uncomfortable way. SMIs are marginalized differently than solely depression/anxiety/The Nice PTSD, and by refusing to write them you're actively contributing to the stigma.
I think (?) I've spoken in the past about how I believe that the rigorous external and internal policing of writing people of marginalized identities is actively harmful towards efforts to increase diversity of experience and background in fiction. A lot of fanfiction writers are just terrified to write people who they can't directly relate with, because they're worried 'they'll get it wrong' and be Big Cancelled. I think this is negative enough when it prevents people from going outside of their comfort zone, but on a macro level I think this results in people refusing to write characters of marginalized identities as all. It's an insidious thought process, and it's reflected in people's unwillingness to diversity their writing or acknowledge canon diversity.
'Well, I don't understand what it's like to be Black, so I don't want to write Black people'. 'I want to project on this character, so I only want to write them with mental illnesses and identities I have'. 'If I write a marginalized character incorrectly people will yell at me, so I won't write a marginalized character who's marginalized differently than me at all'. Can you imagine writing a lesbian character with a boyfriend because 'you feel uncomfortable writing lesbian experiences'? It's blatantly homophobic. But people do that with disability and race/ethnicity ALL THE TIME.
People with SMI notice that you feel uncomfortable with them. It's obvious. They notice when a character has a SMI + anxiety, and you only write their anxiety. They notice when a character displays symptoms of a SMI in canon, but you write it out. And POC notice when the characters of color are written out. I know we all like to project on the blorbos and relate to them, and in the joys of your own head do whatever, but as a writer if you only stick to identities you're comfortable with you are actively being a worse writer. Which to me is the REAL sin lmfao.
#my asks#thanks for enabling me lizzy if i didn't get this out i would have just vagued for the rest of time#even just beyond all of this on a more subtle lvl. HC people with SMI cowards. just do it. its good for you.#the two times me/a close friend have proposed on a fandom server "hey I read X as having a SUD/being on the schizophrenic spectrum'#there was actual fascinating pushback and rejection#people got MAD.#'blorbo wouldn't be an alcoholic he's not a bad person :(' fuck off#i dont use the word often but its ableism and you can be mentally ill and still ableist#if you dont feel educated enough on something to write it then do research#and while research wont give you everything it's a start#if you feel like you can only write people just like you then frankly? skill issue#i mentioned that the last fic was a bit of a spite fic - well#it was scientifically fascinating how the majority of a fandom wrote/acknowledged a character as depressed and anxious#but actively got incredibly defensive when someone suggested that the psychotic character may have had a psychotic disorder#it was so blatant. very annoying. anyway.
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MY BEAUTIFUL RIPTIDE OCS... their names are catalina and milo avery <3 catalina's a water genasi, and milo's a tiefling :] !!
#my post#my art#YAAAY#points at milo. estrogen could save her#anyways these are my sillies that i cant stop thinking about#theyre siblings (milos adopted nobody tell him /j) and they grew up in a small fishing town#until they decided to run away and become pirates together as teenagers!!#they did that for a while until catalina left to find a new crew by herself. nothing against milo she just wanted to do some hashtag self#discovery. that was all fine and cool they kept in touch and stuff#until one day cat reads a newspaper and finds out that??? apparently milo mutinied and is now the captain of that old crew?? AND HES JUST#COMMITTING ACTS OF TERRORISM????#ok see cats in this whole pirate thing to travel the world and adventure and make friends. milo wants to do something worth remembering and#that something does not necessarily have to be something good#the only long-lasting member of milos crew is a Guy who i havent named yet. theyve got a weird toxic yaoi thing going on dw about it#also milo is like. val velocity. he got pissed off hearing about how those incompetent fucking riptide pirates have been rising into infamy#and all have ever-growing bounties meanwhile his crew has done Nothing Interesting. so he started atrocities<3#its fine. its all cool. however it may take slightly more than just estrogen to save her
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*Makes an anti-Luke Castellan post (or any kind of post that does not see Hermes as the devil incarnate)*
Ar nawr am i gonna get screenshotted and complained about again
#wolffox speaks#This is directed#every time i do this it goes through my head#it's only happened once lmao 😭#The mutals started their own fucking argument with them that time#Mutuals i promise that if it happens again i'll act considerably more angrier than last time#Hermes is not the fucking blame for everything that has happened#He's to blame for Luke#The oracle. May's insanity. The prophecy (in general) and the minor gods not being noticed are not even close to his fault#pjo#Anti Luke Castellan#Luke Castellan crit#i cant remember the anti Luke tags#Pretty sure the person that did it the first time follows me now lmao#Idk haven't checked. I have more beef with someone in their comments than i did with them#one person in their comments was/is the Percy to my Alabaster
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