#this man has severe depression

[llewnanith]

gavin grieve makes me want to start eating my floorboards like i cannot stop thinking about him and the grieve family. i can’t stop thinking about gavin knowing how to duck and weave between clawing to get people to look at him and knowing how to make people’s eyes slide off of him for safety. how his first spell was a silencing spell on his room. how he was shocked when his family got rid of his stuff - as if he knew he was unloveable but didnt know he was that unloveable. how he was willing to maim himself for the chance to win, just for the approval of it all. how even he didn’t think he’d live. i can’t stop thinking about scenarios where he would have eaten separately from his family, hearing talking from the room over. how no matter how many times he searched those pictures he still was disappointed about not being in them. how when his family talked about his death as already having happened, he would have had to learn to stop arguing, to find an exit as quick as possible. to swallow his grief of his own life. how he probably feels stranded with no concrete plans of the future. how he probably learned to cry silently. how he brushes off his family treatment as something inevitable, typical, deserved. how the taste of neglect is something that fits in his mouth like a bit, silencing him at night when he wants to scream from it all. literally how do you recover from this. when you build your life around your own ghost, what happens after that’s gone and all that’s left is you?

[spider-man-2o99]

(shaking you, wailing, frothing at the mouth, etc.) miguel is a heavily-traumatized person and. like. i really just cannot stress enough that that influences just So Much Of How He Acts, man.

[pacific-coast-hockey]

yk i have not been watching the rookie tournament due to the horrors but getting all my information secondhand thru @whoredeleau, it does strike me very much as similar to the '22 rookie tournament, where i walked out of it convinced this would be the cuda's year. and it absolutely was NOT, but i did proceed to have the most fun i've ever had as a barracuda fan in the 22-23 season. fingers crossed the vibes are changing

[little-red-fool]

D and J are a great duo because D seems like the typical class clown and a suave womaniser but he’s extremely depressed and suicidal whereas J seems very moody and reserved but she’s actually having the time of her life and usually in a good mood.

[fluffs-n-stuffs]

silly vampire costumes and their added benefits™️ (directly based on this)

[lupins-hehim-pussy]

I think I accidentally made Wriothesley AuDHD. fuck

[definitelynotshouting]

Do you think that in the “Grian fesses up immediately” au, he would purposely. not eat or sleep or do things like that because he’d think he doesn’t deserve it

do you think that when or if anyone would try to messaging him, he would ignore it every single time just to cry about it later but never message back

do you think some of the hermits, cough coffh scar and mumbo, would repeatedly try to message him and text him and desperately try to get back into contact with him

do you t

Obligatory tw for discussions of suicidal ideation

I think its a lot softer but more deeply aching tbh-- its less that he denies himself food and rest and more that he just. Stops being himself in favour of this empty shell going through the motions

I think he disconnects his comm from everyone, tbh, because why would they want to talk to him??? Why would he want the reminder??? He fucked up and now he has to pay the price. So Scar and Mumbo and any others who want him around just straight up cant reach him!!! He has effectively vanished like a ghost

Its part of why Iskall is so eager to reconnect with him when they accidentally meet. Grian's singleplayer is far from Hermitcraft, but Iskall travels a lot for VH, and they happened to meet in a server hub while looking for supplies not immediately available to them

for Grian, he sorta... assumed this would be his last stop into a hub. Period. But then Iskall saw him, and wanted to reconnect, wanted to hang out, and it stalls him in his tracks a bit, enough to put his own plans on hold for a while (but with the lingering sensation of waiting for himself to die as he does it. Thats a big part of this au too-- the waiting for yourself to die and then realizing you Arent, and suddenly having to grapple with the idea of a future again)

But yeah personally i think Grian's day to day is like. Mundane chores where he goes through the motions. Farming food he doesnt even need to eat. Taking care of limited livestock. Early to mid-game stuff. And the rest of the time he just kinda sleeps, because life is easier to face when he's unconscious for it. And he hasnt built anything more than a simple cottage in a long, long time

[transtranslations]

Empty by 小梅むすび (Koumemusubi)

(continued from part 1 here)

Please go and make sure you give the original creator some likes and bookmarks at the link above!! They deserve it!

Thank you for reading!

[mad-hunts]

19.     entry made talking about a simple    /   normal day.

'dear diary' prompts...

[TRANSCRIPTION: so, i'd like to start this off by saying that i sometimes crave a sense of normalcy more than ever in my life... though i know that people might not expect something like that out of me. you know, because i seem so devoted to my work, i guess. but i have to say that after getting a taste of it today, it's probably when i'm at my happiest. me and jack had spent the day together, which is something we actually rarely get to do. he had told me about this crepe place that had opened up a little while ago and he seemed really eager to go there. so i invited jack to do that this morning and i swear, i hadn't seen him smile that big in a while. which did something funny to my heart.

and by that, i mean you know that feeling you get when you can't contain the love you have for someone? yeah that was pretty much what ended up happening to me; a fuzziness had hit me in the chest. but after we went there, and jack ate an impressive amount of crepes (he was really fond of the nutella and strawberry ones), my son suggested that we see this new movie that came out recently. and it was hard to pass up so of course i said yes. we snuck in some candy and drinks because, honestly, who wants to pay for the overpriced candy they have? not us so we did that and just like i expected... the theater was pretty packed since it was for the new hunger games movie. it was good though!

anyhow, after that, jack wanted to spend some time just hanging out by the water when he did something that surprised me. jack hugged me. and it was really nice, because i can't remember the last time my son gave me one like that. he went on to tell me that he missed 'this part of me.' this got me to thinking that, yeah, i have been treating him not so well for a while. so maybe i ought to change that. jack deserves to have a father who doesn't switch up on him every day, from being mean to being nice.

maybe i'll call my therapist back and tell her i want to start seeing her again. she might've said some things that i didn't like the last time, one of those being that i exhibit behaviors that are typical of sociopaths — but i guess i can make an exception for jack, because he's my little bug.

signed, barton. ]

[readymades2002]

trying to do some financial math for if i move out and getting sick to my stomach

[bumblingbabooshka]

Tuvok’s Father, Sunak, telling his favorite story

[barkingangelbaby]

wanna play the sims soooo baaaaad but bg3 takes up so much space I can't update it </3 maybe I'll ask N to help me clean out some stuff bc I simply Do Not Know things about computers lmao

[orcelito]

It's a little funny. I spend so much time compartmentalizing that I convince myself I'm totally fine, of course, all the time.

But when I was filling out the questionnaire before my therapy appointment yesterday, it was like

.... OK yea maybe I have some problems

Also this one 😂😂😂

[lovethatlaiduslow]

hot girl shit (watching a radiohead documentary alone in my dorm)

[4e7her]

hello. sorry i disappeared again i think this is just who i am now. finally living my dreams of being a cryptid

i wrote like a chapter and a half of a fuckign ladybug fic today. it is cringe but i am free. who is interested (it's not gonna follow canon very closely at all because i do not care it is for my enjoyment)

[pyreshe]

thinking about my immortal ocs and their fun family drama 🥰