#this ls long guys.
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so @emsprovisions's tarlos hc post yesterday inspired me...i had to make tk in the bucees pajama pants real
+ a bonus nighttime variant bc i liked it too much not to post it too
#tarlos#tk strand#carlos reyes#911 lone star#911 ls#i couldnt get the image of tk in those stupid beaver pants out of my head. so now you guys get this pls enjoy#god i hate them...they just woke up and tks already being all flirty#poor carlos is still half asleep...Not For Long Though#always happy to bring an emily headcanon to life <3#steph draws#x
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"In total, Leonor governed Navarre as lieutenant, with some minor hiatuses, from 1455 to 1479, making her the effective ruler of the realm for nearly twenty five years. Out of her female predecessors, only Juana I served a longer period; however, Juana I was detached from the governance of the realm and physically distant from Navarre. Leonor however, remained in the kingdom throughout her lieutenancy, making her the female sovereign with the highest record of residency in Navarre.
One of the enabling factors for Leonor’s constant presence in the realm was the “Divide and Conquer” power-sharing mechanism that she employed with her husband, Gaston of Foix. Blanca and Juan had a similar division of duties, but unlike her parents’ often contrary objectives, all of Leonor and Gaston’s actions can be seen to be working toward their joint goals of obtaining the Navarrese crown and politically dominating the Pyrenean region. In order to achieve their ambitions, the couple were adept at working as a team even when physically seperated or carrying out divergent duties.
Politically, it appears that they took on different areas of negotiatiion. Gaston was the designated emissary to the French court, which was entirely appropriate as one of the French king’s leading magnates. One important example of his involvement in negotiations of this type include Gaston’s visit to the French court in the winter of 1461–62 to negotiate the marriage between their heir and the French princess, Magdalena, which ensured Louis XI’s backing for Leonor’s promotion to primogenita. Gaston also conducted negotiations on behalf of his father-in-law, Juan of Aragon, with the King of France, with a successful outcome in the case of the Treaty of Olite in April 1462, which was intimately connected to the marriage that Gaston was orchestrating for his son and Magdalena of France.
Even though Gaston normally took on the role of intermediary with the French crown, there are two letters issued by Leonor during her marriage in December 1466 as lieutenant of Navarre that show her involvement in French affairs. These letters were written during a period of extreme crisis, when Juan II’s difficulties in Catalonia were matched with Leonor’s continuing struggle with the Peralta clan in Navarre. In these letters, Leonor was playing on her familial connection to Louis XI, in hopes of his aid and backing, asking him to “commend this poor kingdom and the said princess to him [Louis XI] as one who is of his house.” Moreover, these letters show Leonor’s independent interaction in crucial diplomatic negotiations with France, both in receiving embassies directly from Louis and in sending her own personal ambassador, Fernando de Baquedano, with detailed instructions on how to proceed.
Gaston appears to have been more engaged with marital negotiations for their numerous offspring than Leonor. However, this may be due to the fact that the couple overwhelmingly chose French marriages for their children. Only three of Leonor’s children did not contract a French betrothal: Pierre who became a cardinal, a daughter who died young, and Leonor’s youngest son, Jacques (or Jaime), who married into the Navarrese nobility. Given the fact that Gaston was more intimately connected to the French court and the nobility of the Midi, it seems reasonable that he would take on the role of chief negotiator for these matches. All of the marital arrangements for their children were made in order for Gaston and Leonor to achieve their joint goals, the acquisition of the throne of Navarre and the consolidation of their power and influence in the Pyrenean region.
Another area where Gaston necessarily played a more central role was militarily. Robin Harris acknowledges Gaston’s successful military career and notes that after his useful military service to the French crown, “the comte was permitted by the [French] king in the last years of his life to employ his military resources in order to further his family’s interests in Navarre.” Gaston also performed many military services for his father-in-law; the agreement of 1455 that promoted Leonor and Gaston to the successors of the realm required Gaston to go to Navarre on Juan’s behalf and retake those areas that had fallen to the rebels “for the honor of the King of Navarre as well as for his own interests and those of the princess his wife."
However, there is some evidence for Leonor’s involvement in one military foray. In the winter of 1471, Leonor took part in a daring attempt to seize the capital, Pamplona, from her opponents, the Beaumonts. Leonor participated in an attempt to storm one of the city gates with a group of armed supporters. Moret notes that “this surprise was reckless; for it exposed the person of the princess to obvious risk and was somewhat rash.” Moreover, the element of surprise was ruined by the cries of her supporters shouting “ Viva la Princesa !” which alerted the Beaumont troops to the threat, and Leonor and her supporters were swiftly ejected from the city.
Like her mother, the noted peacemaker, Leonor was also involved in moves to reduce the civil discord in the realm. Zurita credited Leonor with “making a great effort to resolve the differences of the parties and subdue the kingdom into union and calm.” Leonor represented her father in negotiations for a truce with the supporters of the Principe de Viana on March 27, 1458, at Sang ü esa. Zurita notes, “The princess Lady Leonor was there at that time in Sangüesa and signed the treaty with the power of the king her father.” Leonor was instrumental in the forging of another truce that was contracted in Sangüesa, in January 1473, and she was also present at a conference with her father and her half-brother Ferdinand in Vitoria in 1476 “accompanied by the nobility of Navarre to renew the treatties . . . and attempt to arrive at a stable peace.
Although both spouses were named to the lieutenancy of Navarre, the documentary evidence clearly demonstrates that Leonor appears to have taken on the bulk of the administration of the realm. This was entirely appropriate as it was Leonor, not Gaston, who had the hereditary right to the crown. Moreover, it was logical for Leonor to remain in Navarre so that her husband could look after his own patrimonial holdings and continue to serve as a military commander for the King of France.
Leonor was an active lieutenant but she struggled to implement her rule fully across the kingdom, as many areas were dominated by the Beaumont faction who were opposed to her and her father Juan of Aragon. This meant that at times, she had no control or access to certain key cities in the realm, including the capital, as mentioned previously. Her grandfather’s impressive seat at Olite was the center of her sister’s court, but Leonor eventually regained her hold on the castle and used it as one of her primary residences between 1467 and 1475. Sangüesa remained an important base for Leonor, and she was also associated with Tudela on the southern edge of the kingdom.
Leonor’s difficulty in implementing her rule across the whole of the kingdom is illustrated by a prolonged struggle between the lieutenant and the town of Tafalla, which consistently refused to send representatives when she called together meetings of the Cortes. Tafalla was a center of Beaumont strength, which had supported her brother Carlos in his struggle with Juan of Aragon and was thus bitterly opposed to her appointment to the lieutenancy. Between 1465 and 1475 there is a series of missives from Leonor both summoning representatives from the town and then expressing disappointment when they failed to arrive. During this period, Leonor appears to have called a meeting of the Cortes at least six times, but the town consistently refused to send envoys to the assembly. There is a sense of increasing exasperation and anger in these documents at the repeated failure to participate in these important events. At one point, in late 1471, Leonor personally came to the town to give advance notice of her intent to call another Cortes the following summer, perhaps to circumvent any excuse that the town did not have sufficient time to send representatives, but Tafalla still did not participate in the assembly.
As her authority was contested, Leonor was keen to stress her agency and her position in the documents that she issued. However, at times she even struggled with the chancery; between 1472–73, Juan de Beaumont retained the seals of the kingdom and refused to let Leonor have access to them. In 1475, she granted a reduction in taxes to the important city of Estella acknowledging the reduced capacity of the city to pay after the population had shrunk from the effects of war and flooding. In this document she stressed her efforts to assist all of the urban centers of the realm, to help them recover from the years of civil conflict and devastation, “the other good towns of the said realm have been refurbished by our certain knowledge, special grace, our own change and royal authority.
Leonor’s address clause drew on all of her family and marital ties as a means of establishing her authority:
“Lady Leonor, by the grace of God princess primogenita , heiress of Navarre, princess of Aragon and Sicily, Countess of Foix and Bigorre, Lady of Bearn, Lieutenant general for the most serene king, my most redoubtable lord and father in this his kingdom of Navarre.”
The signet that Leonor used for the majority of her lieutenancy as well as her sello secreto had heraldic devises that mirror her address clause, bearing the arms Navarre, her family dynasty of Evreux, her husband’s counties of Foix, Béarn, and Bigorre, and finally the Trast á mara connections to Aragon, Castile, and Léon.
To sum up, Gaston and Leonor’s ability to divide up roles and responsibilities demonstrates the couple’s effective partnership, using each partner in the most appropriate arena. Moreover, this division was entirely necessary as the couple’s widespread territorial holdings and the demands of balancing the complicated and difficult political situation both within Navarre and the Midi and between France, Castile, and Aragon meant that both partners needed to be fully engaged and active in order to achieve their mutual goals and further their dynastic interests.
Even though Leonor and Gaston generally employed this mode of “Divide and Conquer” that left Leonor primarily responsible for the administration of Navarre while Gaston oversaw his own sizable patrimony, the couple did work together as a unit whenever possible. Documentary evidence shows that Gaston came to stay with Leonor in Navarre for short periods, particularly during the autumn of 1469 and 1470. There is also some additional evidence to indicate an earlier reunion in 1464, which appears to indicate a desire on the part of the couple to be together. Gaston and his party were stuck in the mountain passes between Foix and Navarre on his way to visit Leonor. The princess issued a series of orders to dispatch men and pay for additional recruits and mules in the mountains in order to clear the passes and roads for Gaston, including one order for 300 men to be sent to help. Gaston’s death in 1472 took place on another journey to see his wife in Navarre; he died en route of natural causes in the Pyrenean town of Roncesvalles.
Overall, Gaston and Leonor worked together with the mutual goal of obtaining the crown of Navarre, throwing the weight of Gaston’s power, wealth, connection, and military forces behind Leonor’s hereditary rights and were willing to fight off opposition from their own family in order to succeed. They worked in partnership, with each partner taking on the most appropriate role; Leonor was responsible for the governance of Navarre, and Gaston supported her militarily and financially. They both worked on diplomatic efforts to achieve their ambitions; Gaston used his position as a powerful French vassal and general to gain support while Leonor negotiated with her Iberian relatives to maintain their rights.
[...] Tragically perhaps, Leonor hardly had a chance to enjoy the position of queen regnant when it finally came her way. Leonor’s death, only a few weeks after her father’s in February 1479, meant that her rule as queen lasted less than a month. Leonor changed her address clause to reflect her altered position as “Queen of Navarre, Princess of Aragon and Sicily, Duchess of Nemours, of Gandia, of Montblanc and Peñafiel, Countess of Bigorre and Ribagorza and Lady of Balaguer.” Ram í rez Vaquero points out that most of these titles were disputed; several were titles that should have come to her as part of her paternal inheritance from her father but in reality would have gone to her half-brother Ferdinand de Aragon. In addition, the French titles that Leonor had held as Gaston’s wife had already been passed to her grandson. It appears that Leonor had enough time to mount a formal coronation, on January 28, 1479, at Tudela, firmly establishing herself as Queen of Navarre, even if only for a brief moment. Moret remarked that “out of all the kings and queens of Navarre she was the one who reigned the shortest, although she may have been the one who desired [the crown] most.”
-Elena Woodacre, "Leonor: Civil War and Sibling Strife", The Queens Regnant of Navarre: Succession, Politics and Partnership, 1274-1512 (Queenship and Power)
#gotta love ruthless ambitious mutually devoted power couples 💅#(they can have a little fratricide. as a treat)#historicwomendaily#Leonor of Navarre#Gaston of Foix#aka the self-declared malewife#Navarre history#Leonor fighting and scheming and waiting for the throne for decades only to finally succeed and then die less than a month later#biggest of Ls honestly#I do wonder what she would have thought about that twist of fate#Was she bitter about the hollow victory of it all?#Or was there nothing but satisfaction that she died as the Queen of Navarre#a position she had fought for for so long#or...both?#(also let's get one loud 'BOO' for Juan the Faithless aka one of the worst historical fathers I have ever read about)#(this is the guy who raised Ferdinand 'I'm going to lock up my own daughter' of Aragon btw. This is where he learned it from)
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got the tldr of the vid that I'm Not Watching All That & somewhat amusing how the straw breaking the camel's back for people over James Somerton is his blatant and unashamed plagiarism (as it should be genuinely i don't think you can nor should recover from this) like he hasn't regurgitated for years vile, unempathetic, ahistorical and Purely Just Wrong information about gay history including about the fight for legal same-sex marriage in the US and the AIDS crisis. like an alarming amount of people truly heard his ass say "all the good fun funky artistic and radical gays died of aids and all those who were left were unfun stuck-up prudes and conservatives also the fight for legal same-sex marriage was an assimilationist ploy by the latter who just wanted big gay weddings" as if the gay men who survived the epidemic didn't literally lose lovers and friends and entire communities and long-term partners who they shared a life with and who were denied any crumb of this previous life at their death because there was no legal recognition for same-sex cohabitation and unions and their homophobic family could tear everything from the surviving partner thanks to this lack of recognition and let it slide.
some people out there were truly so eager to shit on the boring assimilationist prude gays who survived aids by being stuck-up prudes and who just wanted "big gay weddings" they made up in their minds to get mad at that they turned their brains off and let it slide. they could've used their smoothed-out brains for ONE minute & found out that surviving took 1) plain boring luck and 2) radical, loud, proud gay activists campaigning for safe/safer sex and the information campaigns they led, as well as the protests and demonstrations they undertook to make the government fucking care for once. and that legally-recognized unions [be they civil or religious] were a matter of survival for the partner left behind. some people out there truly let a business major with a turtleneck (possibly the definition of boring) passing himself off as cool and radical and an intellectual tell them homophobic bullshit. and did not blink. like OF COURSE this guy's gonna be a plagiarist. he needs to get his information from SOMEWHERE. because when he tries to formulate his own stuff it's complete fabrications or the frankensteining of multiple sources that he manages to misunderstand/misrepresent threefold over. trying to fit a knit sock over the foot with the inside out and wonder why that itches.
i know many people in his audience are likely very young and also likely american and as such did most of their growing up in a world where their country (1 out of 195. give or take.) had legalized gay marriage but i cannot even begin to describe 1) how Young legalized gay wedding is, even in ""the west"" and 2) how many. other countries there are. my country legalized same-sex marriage before the US did. i am not even 25 and i still remember the hordes of catholics marching down the streets chanting homophobic slogans, implying the only reason two mommies or two daddies would want to raise a child together is for nefarious, vile purposes. i still remember families having to drag their asses into court to argue that, yes, a woman who raised a child for its whole life with another woman she's in a long-term committed cohabitated relationship with should have the right to be considered a direct guardian even if she's not biologically related to the child, and spending thousands of bucks having to argue their case in court. this might be shocking to some, but there are countries where homosexuality is punishable by death. in others, not by death, but by imprisonment. in others, not by imprisonment, but by ""medical intervention"". in others, not by ""medical intervention" but by fines. and in some others still, you can be gay (yay!) but you still cannot get married or civil-unioned, and the very same shit that was discussed in the 80s is still discussed now. the right to stay a guardian of your partner's child if your partner dies or is ill, so the kid does not go into foster care. the right to inherit your partner's property according to married rights instead of having through long annoying time- and money-consuming legal processes. the right to arrange your partner's funeral or have a say in their medical choices if they're incapacitated instead of their (potentially homophobic) families.
like We Are Not There Yet. we are not in a world where any homosexual can truly, fully, wholeheartedly assimilate, whether you consider it a good thing or not. fun gay artists and boring uninteresting gay office workers die the same death that we all do. the one you don't wake from. and guess what. all types of homosexuals, regardless of which ones you pick and choose to be mad at, are affected by homophobic legislation. not just the ones you think should be spared because they're oh so fun. and oh so radical.
donate to the rainbow railroad org if you can. they help LGBT+ people escape state-sponsored violence. a singular nail on one of their members' hand does more activism and real-life good than any mfer making video essays could do in his entire life.
#also were the two gay male writers who died of AIDS who's shit you stole of the ''fun artistic gays'' or the boring ones? you seem to like#their stuff enough to steal. you want their talent their eloquence and their presence; which is missed; sooo bad you look stupit!#also gay people have always gotten married. privately; clandestinely; in secret; in shame often.#gay people have had commitment ceremonies for as long as we've had partners.#like even if some of us did want ''big gay weddings''. by all means cope and seethe that no one wants your hand in marriage#and to dedicate their lives to you as you do to them publicly; to the world's face. but that's a skill issue.#not making this shit rebloggable i'm just complaining about the guy. have disliked him for a while for this ^ & also his fabrication of#how Radclyffe Hall's trial actually went. like you can literally wikipedia this shit.#unrelated me and my dad have this joke where when i feel like my academic life is not too great/i maybe should have done something else#i go ''well i might have gone to the Unemployment Factory; but at least i'm not a Business Student [shocked face] [retching face]''#and my dad hysterically laughs. all of the worst people he's ever met had been business students once.#anyways. allmother mother of all great priestess of dishing out Ls to the deserving#thank you for having taken this man down in such a glorious colossal blaze. CHEH!#neigh (blabbers)
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AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH THEY'RE DANCINGGGG :'DDDD
STOPPPP THEY'RE SO SWEEEET 😭😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️
Everyone looks so sweet and happy :')))
Awww hi Judd <33
It's okay honey, it's rough :'((
Yeahh honey I know, that's rough 😭😭❤️🥺
Exactly, you don't know anything yet <3
Grace is so perfect, and great at getting him back in it and keeping him grounded <33 I love her and him and them so much <3333
Yeah lol, calm down a bit on the towel business Judd xD
Just dance :'))
His suit is still very iconic btw
And Grace's hair is beautiful 🥰
Awww hey y'all :D
Lol, sillies 🥰🥰
Nope he means wedding :OO
OOP DANG O.O
YEP LOL
The way he said it was very blunt xD like the tone
Awww spin :'))
Oop?
LOL
Do it guys lol, go for it xD!
(tossing a bouquet)
Awww Owen :'(( :')
Ahhh, looking at TK and Carlos but then to Robert and his wife as well, and their daughters :'))
Awww <3
Lol :')
Earlier I saw her and was like huh xD oh right they're kinda dating lol
Aww glad she's checking up on him ,|
LOL YMCA XDDD
Realll though my at dances xD
Gotta save it for the line dances, and take breaks during the slow dances lol
Oh of course, no other way to do it xD well there is but yk lol
Like landing a plane XDDD
Yeah, they are :'))
Oop o.o
Ohh nooo :'((( ❤️❤️❤️💔😭
It sucks but I do see why :(( 😭 <33
Awww <333
It is a pretty great memory though :'))
AYYY yeah this is a good song for dances :D
I wanna go to a wedding 😌
They seem so fun lol
AWWWW look at them all :'D
LOL Iris and TK :')) twirling around <333 they're gonna be such good besties
That guy int he white suit is eating it up xD
Awww Carlos and Andrea 🥰🥰❤️❤️😭 :')))
Awwww 😭❤️❤️❤️
Awww she's good :'))) that's good <3333 I'm so glad
AAAAHHHHHH yes literally 😭😭❤️🥰👏👏 the best night of his life :'))
Oop :o :D
LOL Paul yelling "TOMMYY" xD
TK joining Carlos 🥰
"By a certain paramedic *TK*" DANG girl did not even hesitate 💀 XDD
Lol his little throwing up of his hand xD :')
AWWW him cuddling Carlos's arm 😭 stoppp I'm not okay, they better be so clingy during and after this (the wedding) x'D
AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH AWWW W H A T 😭😭😭😭😭😭💔🥺🥺🥺🥺❤️❤️❤️❤️
Awwww everyone's faces :'(( :') 😭😭😭😭😭😭🥺🥺🥺💔❤️
"This is from your husband" AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH :'DDDD 😭😭😭😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰🥺🥺🥺
GUYS THEY'RE ACTUALLY MARRIED :')))
:OOOO B E I N G A L I V E????!!?!?
. . . this song was on glee-
XDD that's just a thing I say lol
But I also distinctly remember thinking that, if not in the humourous way I tend to say it, when I first saw this lol
Anyway, back to pretending I haven't seen it xD
Awww TK already looking so emotional 😭
GOSH this song is so perfect for them <333
And they DESERVED such a dramatic and beautiful song honestly <3333
Tarlos, but everyone and the whole show, really <333.
:'OO! Tommy's voice is BEAUTIFUL by the way <333
Eat that UPPP girl :'))
:'o Awww taking them to the airport :')) :'(
That pervasive sadness in Owen :'(( it's rough <3
That kiss, and the hug with his girls, is emotional and they don't even know why 😭😭💔❤️🥺 <333
This is gonna hurt them, even if he believes he's sparing them from whatever xd it will be a different kind
Awww look at them all :')))
Nancy and Mateo <3333 so cute
Awww Paul and Asha :'DDD they're so beautiful <333
Also Carlos's sisters and their husbands (who don't get seats or faces lol /lh), it must be so sweet for them to see :')) like Carlos getting married I mean
AAHHHH my boysss 😭😭 <333
Clinging to each other :')) 😭🥺❤️
AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH THEIR HONEYMOONNNN :'DDDD
THEY'RE ON THEIR HONEYMOON Y'ALL 😭😭😭😭🥺🥺❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰!!!! FINALLYYYY!!!
YOU DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND :'DDDD 😭😭😭😭❤️🥰🥰🥰🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥰🥰!!! THEY FINALLY MADE IT X'D :'DDD!!! WHOOOO YEAHH YAYY :'DD :'))
They're so cute 😭😭😭❤️ <333
I love them so much 🥰
Happy for them :'))
AWWW putting Charlie next to Wyatt :'))
Lol and they both have their blocks <33
Ahh but see the TV as a compromise :'))
Maybe not on purpose meaning that but TK me <33
Robert's family <333
And tarlos still clinging to each other :'))
And Marjan and her man (Yusuf is it? I believe :'D) :')) <333 adorableee
And Owen :')) ❤️
Tommy is EATINGGG this by the way ❤️😭😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️🥺💔🥰
Such a good song <33
It would be Gwyn's favorite :')) she has good taste <33
AWWW them 😭😭🥺💔
Gosh :'((( :')
Yeah, at least they got to know each other a bit <3333
It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all <3
Yeah, definitely not ready xdd
"Big brother" :'(( no one should have to bury their younger sibling
It just sucks :'(( D':
AWWW themmm :')) 🥺
Holding Andrea's hand 😭😭😭🥺❤️💔
And TK and Carlos are in it together <333 even if Carlos is the one holding her hand :') they both mean it <3
Awwww Tommy looking at Trevor :'D
Tommy's so beautiful :'))
It's rough but I'm so glad they're all happy <333
As happy as they can be in this life :')))
AWW AAHH AYYYY Wyatt stacking blocks :'DDD good for him <333
It also probably helps that they have a little more of a purpose, being with Charlie :'))
Awww they look so happy 🥰🥰 they are :'D I'm so happy for him and them <333
Oh no 😭😭💔 :'((
Gosh <333
Goodbye, Robert :'((
TK'S TEARS 😭😭🥺❤️❤️❤️
Owen taking the mask off 😭😭 :'(
Tommy you absolutely ate that up :'))) she did such an amazing job <333
Especially as TK's second mother 😭😭😭😭🥺🥺❤️❤️❤️❤️🥰
Awww :'))
Thank you Tommy <33
Oof :(
That's just so rough
I'm so sorry Owen <333
And for his family :'(((
Goodbye, Robert ❤️
The sun coming up :'((
And the silence 😭😭😭
Gosh that's awful
So poignant
OUAGH AND ENDING WITH CALLING 9-1-1
GOSH THAT WAS PERFECT 😭😭😭😭😭🥺🥺🥺💔💔💔❤️❤️🥰
Such an amazing end to the season <333
Typed series for a second there lol
But because I was thinking, even though I would want so much more and I'm glad we get at least a bit more, this would be a really amazing ending to the series <333
It's just dramatic and beautiful and emotional enough that it'll be hard to top, and is an iconic moment of the series :') xD
But I'm sure they will <3
Wow. I'm so glad I did this.
It's such an amazing and beautiful episode <333
I'm so glad they're married :'))
And I'm so glad that, in the end, everyone ended up kind of okay :'))
Not perfect, not really even okay, but happy in this crazy world we and they live in
And that's enough :'))
I'm so happy for them <33
And I'm so especially happy for TK and Carlos :'DDD 🥰🥰🥰🥰❤️
HAPPY 0TH/1ST ANNIVERSARY BOYS 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥰🥰🥰❤️❤️❤️ :'DDD X'D
Gosh I love them so much :')))
They finally did it <33 they made it :')
All roads lead to the wedding
And they did :')
Hallelujah <3 xD
Thank goodness lol
Gosh
Wow. Amazing
I love this show so much <333.
#9-1-1 lone star#911 lone star#oasis's 9-1-1 chatter#911 ls 4x18 rewatch#gosh :')) I did it <333#so glad I finally did#wish I hadn't waited as long but that's behind me now :))#also just in time!!#not that I specifically had this goal till 5 minutes ago but 11:59 when I posted this (after I finished but still needed to add tags and a#tiny bit more talking)#(though I ended up talking a lot more lol. but it was during the beginning of the section about how it could be the series finale and I#wouldn't be [too] mad xD I was gonna say that and a tiny bit more so came back to edit)#I just decided I wanted to post it before it's tuesday since it'll come out in a week lol#which I wanted as in not doing it tomorrow but anyway#so good!!!#glad I rewatched it besides the liveblog :')) it's such a good episode#and it's fresh in my mind now lol#but yeah I never allowed myself to fully rewatch it (or rewatch clips for a while and still not much or often lol) so I'm glad I got to :D#before the new season and just right now that is#such a good episode :D#okay!! I'll see y'all later :))#for a bit of a review and some point and mayhaps to finally post a lone star fic before season 5!#we'll see what happens when :)#but that I will do lol#I love you guys :DDD ❤️❤️❤️❤️!!!!#byeeee :))) 🥰🥰🥰🥰 <333!!!!
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you telling me other people dont keep the same special interest theyve had since they were 9. whadda hell
#long tags incoming#technically it could extend all to way to 6 years old since thats when I got my first sonic game#Ive been ere a while! hasnt slowed down any time soon#Id walk backwards into hell for this lil blue guy Im not joking I genuinely would not be the same person without this franchise#unless something REALLY bad happens theres nothing that could ever distance myself from it#taking Ls is intrinsic to being a sonic fan. a mediocre period or part of it wont deter me. I simply move on we ball#I was there for the hype for forces. I saw the theories and excitement and the mass dissatisfaction and disappointment#imagine getting into sonic when the latest game was fucking Lost World. thas meeeeee baybeeeee!!!!!!#I did make a good call by avoiding fandom until a couple years ago and making this blog though#mostly bc of cringe complex and the trauma of growing up autistic and feeling ashamed of my interests and sonic especially being a target#but Ive mostly shaken that off. mostly. still feel embarrassed but its fiiiiiiinnneeeeeee. everybody is wrong except me anyways (joke)#its almost 4am. I should sleep#hydro.txt
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shout out to the LS Dunes fandom for not immediately cancelling the band like the rest of twitter did and instead useing Dunes' music as inspiration for creating their own, original artwork and educating the band in the process.
#see guys? maturity goes a long way#instead of just cursing the band out on twitter#we can act like adults and create art while we're at it!#j screams#ls dunes#frank iero#tucker rule#anthony green#tim payne#travis stever
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"She was blessed, whether she liked it or not." Cassandra is going to survive the games...
otherwise known, as hi, I'm the the anon who's mc survived... when three ppl killed themselves <3 (wow, everyone DID alt delete.)
She will be romancing red (not even a flag) billboard Creon for flavor <3
Tysm for making THEE hunger games IF, you truly took one for the team!!! I bow down!!!
oh poor babygirl...looking at everyones mcs is starting to make me feel bad for what im abt to put them through
cant believe i managed to guess you were that anon☝️(yes i like to guess who the anon is and im for sure wrong almost everytime)
good luck with Creon<3. they certainly do have quite the flavor. someone requested a drabble for their pov the night they met Mc, so its very interesting getting into the creon mindset
and u dont need to thank me for making this game<3. It's purely self-indulgence for me. i go fucking insane over my own game its kinda sad
#thanks for the ask!#that drabble was requested so long ago im sorry to whoever sent it in#speaking of drabbles if u guys want one just send in an idea☝���#i literally have nothing going on so why not write#anyways!#ur mc is beautiful i love her and im so sorry in advance#mc vesper.#taker-of-ls#mc picrews
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OKAY ANY MCR/DUNES/FRANK MUTUALS. if anyone knows where i can get a fiatc stomachaches vinyl for NOT 200$.....PLEASE hmu 😭
#i'm finally deciding to justfuck it and full commit to collecting vinyl#and i've coveted this fucking album for SO long. and it's SO unaffordable ahhhhhhhh#tagging for exposure ily guys#frank iero#frank#frank iero and the cellabration#stomachaches#mcr#my chemical romance#dunes#ls dunes#vinyl#chatter
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i’m really excited for a dunes doc . i’m a music nerd !! i want to know the ins and outs of what seems like a VERY nontraditional songwriting and recording process, how they collaborated, and what their first rehearsals were like
#fucking nerd idiot actually cares about the music get a load of this guy !!#but fr like so intrigued by how much of a backseat anthony and vocals seem to have taken in the songwriting process. it is VERY not what#that usually looks like at all and takes a lot of trust. i want to see how they work together as long term industry ppl#d.riv.el#ls dunes
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This just gave me the imperative impulse to cause drama in the group chat by being hilarious.
#there ls that one guy in my friend group from school who turned out to be the biggest narcissistic shithead but we cant kick out#because too many of my cloaest friends still are either in love with him or have a mom complex the size of the iberian peninsula#so my brain went straight to the next time he types one of his stupid long rants about how special he is and how misunderstood
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Interviews and Playdates (OP81)
(Part of the Teen Dad!Oscar Piastri Au) Summary: The twins have made their paddock debut! The media is asking many of the drivers about it and the kids make a friend… or two.
The twins had been unable to sit still since they woke up this morning, too excited to get to visit the paddock for the first time and finally get to see their dad race. Oscar had hoped they would finally believe that he did in fact race the cars, something the twins were still not convinced of.
Being that it was Oscar’s home race, he had decided to fly his family out to see his home. It was an exciting moment for the whole family.
The minute they got to the paddock, all eyes were on them. Oscar and his fiancée had warned the kids of the media and fans, that there would be screaming and a lot of people. Luckily, the noise and amount of people just made the twins shy, huddling by their parents’ legs, which the adults definitely preferred, losing the two on the paddock at their first race wouldn’t have been the best of first impressions.
As usual, the twins had their priorities in order. Before getting to the McLaren garage, they had demanded to their father that they be able to see their honorary uncle, Logan Sargeant, who wouldn’t be racing that day.
When the twins got to the Williams garage, their favorite American was waiting to greet them, with two LS2 Williams childrens hats, as well as a bag of blue colored candy for them to share. Despite how Logan had been feeling before they had come to visit, seeing them made him feel infinitely much better.
“Logan please, they are off naps and if we give them sugar they are going to crash. I’m not even sure they are going to stay awake long enough to make it until race time.” Oscar pleaded as he watched his longtime friend ignore him and give his kids the treats anyway.
“Oscar its fine, let him spoil them a little.” Honey, Oscar’s fiancée, said.
“Do you guys like the new hats? See the LS? That's my logo. I thought when you guys are surrounded by all the orange- sorry papaya, you’d like to be able to easily see these two with their blue hats.” Logan said, first talking to the twins then their parents. Even if half of him just wanted to have them wearing Williams and Logan merch to piss Lando off, he also thought having them sticking out would be a good idea. It was sweet how much he cared.
After the Williams visit, on the way to the McLaren garage, the Piastri family was met with the two Haas drivers with two girls hiding behind them.
“Oscar, we have two girls here who wanted to say hi to the new grid kids.” Kevin Magnessun said as he pushed his daughter in front of him.
Oscar could see the Haas media admin recording this encounter, ready to capture the cute moment on tape.
But as kids do, there wasn’t much talking between the kids as their dads talked at first, finally after a bit of convincing and nudging, once the ice was broken, they had gotten along quite well. To the point that they all had to take their kids away, kicking and screaming once they had to leave. Luckily though, they had calmed down by the time they got to the McLaren garage.
Tired from the sugar and fighting their parents when separating from the Haas girls, the twins weren’t too enthusiastic when greeted by McLaren members, which their parents apologized tenfold for. They did luckily perk up when they saw their second favorite honorary uncle coming towards them.
“What the hell are these two wearing, Oscar?” Lando asked, pointing to the LS hats the kids proudly adorned.
“We stopped by the Williams garage just cause it was on the way and got two hats from Logan, I'm sure if you had beat him to it they would be wearing your merch but I think they are too attached to them now.” It was a lie, but Oscar didn’t feel the need to tell Lando his kids pleaded to go see Logan before him. He also didn’t mention that his son said he liked the hat so much because McLaren’s orange “hurt his eyes”.
The kids were luckily well behaved for the race, having slept through a bit of it. They were also fortunate that, due to unfortunate circumstances, Logan joined them to watch a little bit of the Grand Prix.
The best moment however, had to be when Oscar’s daughter saw him getting out of the car and finally muttered the words, “Daddy really drives the car!” to her mother.
With all the excitement on the paddock about the Piastri twins, it seemed the media pen was more interested in what some of the drivers had to say about it, rather than asking questions about the race.
Logan Sargeant
“So Logan, rough day for you having to give up your car, but it seems your ‘niece and nephew’ have made their paddock debut, even rocking your own merch in the McLaren garage! How was that for you?” The interviewer asked.
“Yeah, them being here and keeping me company made it all a lot better. They immediately came to Williams because according to Oscar they were demanding to see me. And they wore the LS hats the entire time even though I wasn't racing so I think that has cemented me as the favorite once again.”
Lando Norris
“So it seems you and Logan Sargeant have a bit of an off track feud going on relating to the Norris twins and who their favorite uncle is. Logan had mentioned earlier that they had begged to go to Williams to visit him, before they even got to the McLaren garage. Did you know about this?”
The smile was immediately whipped from Lando’s face at this, “I had known, yes, when they came to the garage wearing Williams hats with a bag of treats in their hand I had assumed, but Oscar told me they just stopped over on the way there. I didn’t know they had asked specifically.”
“Seems he keeps lying to you about where the twins' loyalty lies.”
“He does! Makes me look like an idiot every time he does it.” Lando scoffed, “Whatever, I will win them over somehow. Logan just has a few years head start but I’ll find a way.”
Nico Hulkenburg
“Nico, a video posted by the Haas team earlier showed you and Kevin’s girls hanging out with the Piastri twins. Is there a budding friendship there between them?”
“Yes! They met for the first time today because Kevin and I had managed to bring our girls as well. So sweet seeing them altogether. I’m glad that Noemi will have more friends here. She was already telling her mom earlier that she wanted to plan a playdate with them. Might be hard given we live in different countries but I guess we will have to find a way.”
Daniel Ricciardo
“It's been a few months since it was revealed that your fellow aussie driver is a dad, now his kids are joining us on the paddock. What were your reactions at the time?” The interviewer asks.
“Well, I hadn’t known before he addressed it that he had kids, but it doesn’t seem like anyone else did so that isn’t too much of a surprise. Definitely a shock cause he is so young but good for him. I hadn’t seen his kids but I had heard they were over playing with the Haas girls which is adorable. He must be proud to show his kids what he does.” Daniel replied.
Alex Albon
“So, it seems one of your fellow 2019 rookie seems to have beef with your teammate over who is the better uncle to the Piastri twins. Being friends with both of them, do you have any input?”
“I knew before the rumors about the whole situation because Logan accidentally told most of our team when we were all kind of teasing him about how young he is and how he might be inexperienced in childcare, to which he then showed all of us the numerous pictures and videos of the twins that he took while babysitting or visiting, which I don’t think Oscar actually knew about him telling us. But it is sweet, he takes his uncle duties very seriously. Lando on the other hand, I think Oscar has done him an injustice by not telling him he isn’t the favorite because I think if he knew he had competition he would have been working much harder. Not that he isn’t also sweet with them but I think he may have offered to watch them a few more times.”
#formula 1 imagine#lando norris x reader#oscar piastri x you#oscar piastri imagine#oscar piastri x reader#logan sargeant x reader#alex albon x reader#daniel ricciardo x reader
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American Idiot - LS
American Idiot pairing: Logan Sargeant x reader summary: rule #1: don't fall in love. rule #2: don't break rule #1. rule #3: you broke both rules didn't you? word count: 3567 warnings: smut (18+ only), not proofread, Logan has a bit of a frat guy attitude in parts, mentions of past sexual assault (non explicit) {your mental health is more important than any engagement I get on this, so please don't read if that is a triggering subject for you ❤️} a.n.: here I wrote a happy thing for logan
"Yes, baby, just like that," he moaned, gripping her hips tighter. He wanted to watch her but his eyes slipped shut and he dug his fingers into her skin. "Gonna make me cum."
Y/n suddenly lifted off him, causing his eyes to snap open. Her face was screwed up and at first he thought she was in the middle of cumming, but she let out a pained whine and he decided that couldn't be it.
"What," he gasped, wincing when her knee slammed into his hip as she collapsed next to him.
"Cramp," she whimpered. She lay on her side, almost perfectly still, leg bent at the knee while she lightly punched the mattress. "Fuck."
Logan exhaled harshly and dragged a hand over his face before shifting, sitting up. He could see her calf muscle clenched, lightly spasming under her skin and winced. "It's okay, I've got you."
"There's nothing you can – ow!" she cried out when he gently grasped her ankle and extended her leg. Immediately she was trying to bend it back but he kept it straight. "Logan, no, it hurts!"
"Relax, let me rub it out," he said softly, cupping his other hand over her calf. He began to massage, keeping his touch light at first while she pressed her face into the pillow and nearly screeched in pain. "Y/n, just breathe—"
"Fuck you," she whimpered. "I'm never riding you again. I always get a leg cramp."
"Because you don't stretch," he pointed out, applying more pressure.
She just turned her head and looked at him.
"What?" he asked.
"Oh, just waiting for you say you expect me to stretch you."
"I thought it went without saying."
She tried to kick him, hissing and tensing at the pressure it put on her cramp. "It's not working, Logan."
"I've been doing it for thirty seconds," he sighed. Leaning over, he kissed her cheek. "Please just relax, okay?"
She exhaled slowly. "It hurts, Logie."
"I know, I know. I'm sorry. I'll never ask you to be on top again," he assured her, feeling the cramp starting to loosen. She whined and he was quick to shush her. "Breathe, baby."
She did, slowly and deeply, occasionally groaning in pain as he manipulated the muscle. "Sorry for ruining the sex."
"We can try later," he said with a shrug.
"Maybe I have plans."
"Do you?" he asked. He would be surprised if she did. She tended to stay in on a Saturday night, getting her drinks and partying done on Fridays so she could enjoy the weekend.
"No," she mumbled. "Do you?"
"Only thing I'm doing tonight is you."
She laughed at that, humming when he bent and straightened her knee. "Were you really about to cum?"
"Yeah, but it's fine." It wasn't as though she'd leave him hanging. It was the whole reason behind their arrangement: neither party leaves a meeting unsatisfied.
She'd typed out the agreement in full legalese. Then she'd presented it to him as though arguing a case in front of a jury. Complete with a sexy suit that had only encouraged him to agree and sign so they could get to business.
"Mm," she moaned.
"Better?" He already knew the answer. Her muscle was fully relaxed now, though he was sure it would be sore for a while. She nodded and he kissed her cheek again before sliding off the bed to throw away the wasted condom.
"Thanks, Logie," she murmured when he rejoined her in the bed. She scooted over, hissing softly as she lifted her leg to drape it over his. "Just give me a few minutes."
Her few minutes turned into an hour long nap but he didn't complain. Content to lie with her, he smoothed her hair while she slept, a little amused. She'd been his friend for years, and if anyone had told him even two years before he'd be sleeping with her regularly he would have laughed in their face. But here he was, and as he reached for the covers to pull over them it occurred to him that if he couldn't have sex with her when she woke up he wouldn't be too upset.
"You're so busy with racing, you can't spare time to make an emotional connection with someone enough to sleep with them. I'm busy with work and I'd rather kiss a frog on live tv than let some loser I meet at the club fuck me. It makes perfect sense."
It did, so he'd agreed. Maybe she caught him in a lonely moment, or an extremely horny one. Maybe she'd caught him during a dry spell. Either way, he'd agreed to become platonic lovers with her.
Friends with benefits.
Fuck buddies.
Booty calls.
She'd been right, it was beneficial. He was usually so sexually satisfied that when he met someone he could see as a potential mate, he could focus on actually getting to know them as opposed to getting them in bed. And, having met her coworkers and more than a few of the losers that went to the clubs she did, he knew he had to be a better option than what she had around regularly.
"No falling in love. We're friends, nothing more. No jealousy. If you find someone to love I'll be over the moon, and if I find someone you'll be happy. No unprotected sex. I don't want to be a mom before I'm 25 and you're not ready to be a dad. We both agree to regularly get tested if we sleep with other people. And, lastly, if one of us wants to end the arrangement we end it. Most importantly, we remain friends."
At first it had been amazing. Guaranteed pussy whenever he wanted or needed it? He'd been sold on the idea before she'd even finished the suggestion. If he was away for a race he could just call or FaceTime her for a quick phone sex session?
Amazing.
No pressure. No worries. He didn't have to deal with the girlfriend stuff. He didn't have to remember important dates or to pick up something for her on his travels. She didn't expect him to be her date to work events or to go around pretending to care about the stuff she wanted to buy.
And they still hung out. Sometimes before, sometimes after. Nothing had changed at all in their friendship. She still called him out for being a douchebag, he still insulted her music taste, they still laughed while watching stupid movies.
It was, he thought, like having a girlfriend without all the work.
Until, suddenly, it was different.
He didn't know why he'd bought the stuffed animal in Miami. Probably because she'd said she liked eagles. And it had an American flag shirt on which made it even better in his opinion. But he'd bought it, he'd shown it to Oscar, who'd groaned and laughed and called him painfully American, he'd packed it in his suitcase for the trip back to England.
And he was watching her take it out of the gift bag now, a big stupid grin on his face when she began to laugh.
"Oh my god I love it," she said, hugging it to her chest then hugging him.
That was why he'd bought it, he thought a few minutes later when she was on her knees, staring up at him with pure lust in her eyes. And then he noticed that she kept it on her bed.
She went to Switzerland for something work related. He didn't know what, because she'd told him right before going down on him. They FaceTimed when they could during the two weeks she was out of the country, and when she got back she had a gift for him.
A cuckoo clock.
He loved it and laughed every time it went off, and felt a little rush of warmth because she'd thought of him. It turned out she hated it, because it had a knack for cuckooing loudly just when she was about to come, but he made up for that. At least, going by the way she'd murmur yay when he went down on her.
"So today marks the anniversary of the worst day of my life," she announced one summer afternoon as she walked into his place.
Logan grunted when she pushed her shopping bag at him. "Which worst day?" he asked, closing the door. "When you got dumped by that dickhead Dave?"
"No, that was in November."
"When you caught your boss cheating?" He peered into the bag and set it down, following her to the sofa.
"That was January, and that wasn't a worst day, just a weird day. Like, bad because he can't keep it in his pants but also good because I got a raise." Kicking off her shoes, she flopped onto the sofa.
He racked his brains, going over as many of her worst days as he could recall. The time she'd gotten food poisoning in Brighton? Apparently that had been in March. The time a guy got sick on her in the club? October, how could he forget? The asshole had ruined her costume. Groaning, he threw his head back in defeat, realizing he was rubbing her feet. "You gotta help me out, babe."
"Wow, you did forget." She sighed dramatically, throwing an arm over her face. "And I thought you weren't like other guys? Do you even love me, Logan?"
"I'm rubbing your gross feet—"
"They're not gross I just had a pedicure this – Fuck you," she snorted when he laughed.
"I'm rubbing your amazing feet," he corrected with a roll of his eyes. "The most beautiful feet in the world—"
"Ew, don't make it weird." She lowered her arm and sat up. "But really? You don't remember?"
"No… Wait, was it that time the guy came before you could put the condom on?"
"No, it's – Actually that's next week. Do you know I saw him a few days ago? He pretended he didn't know who I was."
"You made the guy cum in seconds, y/n."
"Okay, and? I made you cum in a minute thirty and you still talk to me."
"You…" He tipped his head. "You timed it?"
"It's my personal best. Aside from Preemie Pete but he doesn't really count because I didn't even do anything to him except grind on him—"
"What's my nickname?" Logan asked suddenly.
"Logie?" She looked confused. "Logie Bear."
"No, no, my nickname. Preemie Pete, Dickhead Dave. You called that guy you met at the store Sainsbury's Steve and the firefighter was Fireman Fred. What do you call me when you talk about me with the girls?"
"That's classified information. I'm not at liberty to discuss it with you, as you are not one of the girls."
"Bullshit, because you've told me all the others," he pointed out. "Go on, tell me."
"Logie—"
"I'm not like Car Guy am I? Because that—"
"Wishbone."
He stopped rubbing her feet, fully turning to face her. "Wishbone?"
"Yeah. Wishbone." She swung her feet to the floor and moved to stand. "We still doing dinner?"
He grabbed her arm and dragged her back down. "Why Wishbone?"
"It's stupid," she groaned, pretending to fight against his hold. "All the nicknames are stupid, they don't really mean – When I first told them about you we'd just met and I said I wished the stupid American would bone me, okay?"
He let her go, even more confused now. "But I have."
"Yes," she said slowly, getting to her feet. "Many times."
"Then why am I still a wish?"
"Well they don't know you're fucking me." She shrugged, grabbing up her bag and heading to the kitchen.
He let that marinate in his brain for a minute before getting up to follow her. "Why don't they know?"
"I don't tell th… Right, I do tell them everything. But they know I was super into you back then and if they found out that you're the only guy I'm sleeping with they'd never stop teasing me. Chicken or salmon?"
"Chicken." She'd been into him back when they met? He tried to remember, to see if he could recall any obvious signs she'd wanted him then, but couldn't. Could only remember her rolling her eyes and looking annoyed when he talked about anything.
But he did remember—
"Oh, y/n," he whispered. "I'm sorry."
"I'm okay," she said quickly. "It was years ago. I'm pretty much over it."
"Don't lie to make me feel better." Because she did. Especially when it came to that. Pretty much over it. Rarely think about it. So far in the past it's hardly worth mentioning. But it was the reason she still slept with a light on. The reason she never went out alone at night. The reason she was wary of new men entering her life. The reason she was hyper aware of her surroundings in public, always mapping out an escape route if needed. It was one of the reasons behind her need to joke and laugh about everything, because she had to keep people liking her. It was the reason she spent so many of her precious days off working with the sexual abuse charity, willing to tell her horror over and over again so girls with similar cruelties would feel seen and understood.
He hadn't known her then. Would never know what she'd been like before her innocence and faith in humanity had been fractured. He only knew her as the woman she was. Fierce and protective and stronger than anyone he would ever know. He often wished he didn't know what had happened to her on that horrible night, but felt honored that she trusted him enough to share that side of her life with him.
"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked softly. She shook her head.
"Can we cook together?" she whispered.
"Of course." He hesitated, finally reaching to squeeze her shoulder. She lifted her head and he saw the tears shining in her eyes. She may not have wanted to talk about it, may have wanted him to just step away and wash his hands or whatever, but he pulled her to him, tucking his chin on her head while he held her, keeping silent while she let herself cry.
Wishing he could meet the monster face to face for just ten minutes.
He held her until her shoulders stopped shaking, until she sniffled and let go of his shirt. Pressing a kiss into her hair, he let go and offered to turn on music, making sure to pull up the playlist of songs that were cheerful and lighthearted. They cooked, or rather she cooked while he stood to the side to hand her things and clean up, and ate on the couch, watching her favorite movie.
And he realized it was his favorite movie now.
She stayed the night and he didn't care that she didn't want sex. Didn't care that she pulled her stuffed eagle out of her bag and held it close while he got ready for bed. Didn't care that the lamp was on. He was just happy to be there for her, to hold her while she fell asleep and then lie there watching her sleep. Even rocks needed support sometimes.
And it struck him – a full two months later – that he looked forward to just seeing her more than he looked forward to the sex. She'd become more than his best friend, more than his hookup, and he panicked constantly that he'd somehow let on that he'd broken the first rule of their arrangement.
But he had the feeling she knew, especially when he went straight to her office after flying in from Singapore to see her instead of going straight home to sleep off the jet leg. Her eyes lit up and she smiled brighter than the weak sun ever could, and when she hugged him tight and told him she'd missed him he knew she meant it.
"Dinner tomorrow?" he asked before leaving. The answer was yes and, no longer exhausted or feeling mediocre as he sometimes did after a race, he went home with a smile on his face.
She showed up at his door with that bright smile and oohed and aahed over the candles and the flowers. Teased him for being a try hard for wearing a suit and kissed his cheek.
Dinner might have tasted divine. Or it might have tasted like sawdust. He would never know.
"Logie?"
God, she was beautiful. Always had been, he realized, wondering why he'd been so blind until just recently. But tonight, in her light blue dress and her eyes sparkling in the candlelight, she was stunning.
Heartbreakingly so. Because she would only ever be his friend.
"Yeah?" he finally murmured, realizing he was staring.
She stood up and left the table, coming back with her purse. Pulling out some papers, she sat down and bit her lip. "We need to talk."
Never a good thing when a woman said that. Swallowing hard, he took a sip of water to push down the lump in his throat. "About what?"
"You remember this?" She held up the papers and he nodded, seeing the contract she'd typed up and printed out for them both to sign.
"You want to end it?" he asked, anxiety curling in his chest, embarrassment heating his face at the way his voice cracked mid-sentence. Had she met someone?
"I think we need to," she said with a frown.
"Wh-why?" God, she'd met someone and hadn't told him and even worse, she'd fallen in love and now he'd be alone—
"I broke rule number one," she blurted.
"We don't have to end it," he said. "Rules get broken all the time. We can work it out—"
"Logie—"
"I can't go back to random meaningless hookups anymore. I can't go back to models that don't know their ass from a hole in the ground—"
She let out a sharp giggle at that, clapping a hand over her mouth. "Logan!"
"I can't do it, y/n. Not when I've had the best thing that's ever happened to me. And I'm not even talking about the sex, it's just… We've spent more time together and I know I wasn't supposed to but I did it anyway because my heart's stupid I guess. I can't just go back to nothing with you—"
"Do you even remember what rule number one was?" she cut in, staring at him with wide eyes.
He froze, blinking slowly. "The one about protection, right?"
"Oh my god," she groaned, slapping her palm to her forehead. "No, Logan. Of course you don't remember. But you do, because you always remember everything, like how I need to sleep with a light on and can't watch horror movies after dark and that I only like white wine even if I'm eating red meet. You play the part of a fucking idiot so well because it shields you from people wanting to get too close and knowing the real you, like you're not the greatest thing America's made since chocolate chip cookies. Like you don't have a heart bigger than Texas."
"Um, y/n—"
"Which is exactly why I broke the stupid fucking rule that I made, because how could I not?" She threw the papers down and covered her face with both hands. "I didn't do it on purpose, you know? But I fucking did it, I fell for you, because the only bad thing about you is your annoying American pride."
"Y/n—"
"And it took everything in me to tell you this, but at least now I know you don't want to change this. You're happy just being fuck buddies and I have to be okay with it because I was the goddamned idiot that wrote the rules—"
"I love you too," he blurted.
She stopped. Lowered her hands. And stared at him.
"I love you," he said softly. "Always have, I think. I just… Never realized it until I wasn't supposed to."
"When did you know?" she whispered.
He sighed, shrugging one shoulder. He couldn't tell her. It would be embarrassing to admit he'd been holding it in since—
"Miami?" she asked.
"Oh come on, how could you know that?"
"Logan Hunter Sargeant, you brought me a stuffed eagle. You hate stuffed animals!"
"Yeah, but I love you."
She stared at him for a few seconds. Then, to his confusion, she began to laugh.
His favorite sound, followed very closely by her moan.
"Oh god, Logie," she giggled.
"When did you know?" he asked once she'd stopped laughing.
"When you left for Miami and I cried because I couldn't go with you," she said.
"God, we're both idiots," he muttered. Then he sat up straight. "Wait, hey, you said… You love me?"
She laughed again, nodding, and stayed laughing while he grabbed the papers and ripped them in half. And was still giggling when he pulled her to her feet and caught her in a sweet kiss.
"And we did break the protection rule," he whispered a lifetime later when they pulled apart.
"You pulled out, doesn't count."
"That's not in the rules."
She rolled her eyes, wrapping her arms around him. "There aren't any rules anymore, Wishbone."
~end~
#f1#logan sargeant#f1 imagine#formula 1#formula 1 fanfic#f1 fanfic#formula 1 imagine#logan sargeant smut#logan sargeant x reader#my writings > ls
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Bad Decisions. (LS)
Summary: After Logan isn’t able to compete in the Australian Grand Prix, his girlfriend shows everyone just how amazing he is. Which leads to a major turn of events.
Note: Used the indent feature instead of copy and pasting that arrow I usually use, lol. Hope you guys don’t mind too much, it’s much easier for me.
Warnings: None
Masterlist here -> Masterlist Link
^ Check my list for all posts! ^
Liked by: logansargeant, lilymhe, and 67,139 others
y/n.user: he may not be able to race this weekend, but that just means he can hangout with me and lily in the garage and heckle the other drivers🙃
view comments…
alex_albon: do you heckle me??
y/n.user: not usually, but this weekend…maybe
alex_albon: ??????
user7: i love how supportive she isssss
logansargeant: i love you❤️
y/n.user: i love you too❤️😙
f1wags: williams has the BEST wags 🙏
ls2editsss: he’ll come back stronger next weekend💪
user3: CUTEST COUPLE EVER!!!!!
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
Liked by: y/n.user, oscarpiastri, and 104,194 others
logansargeant: disappointing weekend. but at least i have my girl ❤️
view comments…
y/n.user: lo🥺
logansargeant: 🙃❤️
y/n.user: ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
f1editpage: awwww, they are so soft
oscarpiastri: sorry about this weekend mate. next week will be better👏
*liked by creator*
user1: loveee their love
alex_albon: i owe you😣
y/n.user: alr. give it back.
lilymhe: AHHHAHAHAHAHA
alex_albon: 😐
wagpagee: y/n is sooo angelic
user6: anyone else find it weird that like the whole grid follows y/n and not logan?
user2: i guess, but y/n has been friends with lily since they were little🤷♀️
user6: eh so?
user2: well lily and alex have been together for around 5 years, so she’s been around the paddock for 5 years instead of the 1 logan has
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
twitter:
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
your instagram story:
seen by: logansargeant, landonorris, and 46,924 others
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
Liked by: logansargeant, flavy.barla, and 68,902 others
Tagged: logansargeant
y/n.user: appreciation post for my my favorite person in the whole world, my own personal captain america❤️🤍💙 i love you, logan. thank you for being the best boyfriend, best friend, and person ever❣️
view comments…
f1wags: well, that’ll do it. the waterworks, oh my🥹
logansargeant: don’t make me cry right now. i’ll make you mrs. sargeant
y/n.user: 😳
logansargeant: unmmm shit
y/n.user: i would say yes. just saying 🤷♀️
user6: she would WHAT
flavy.barla: this is so cute and all, but the comments? you married now, girl?
y/n.user: not yet😞 i’ll lyk
flavy.barla: 🙏💓
oscarpiastri: excuse me? logan? answer your PHONE??
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
your instagram story:
(psa, this is 2 weeks later!)
seen by: logansargeant, danielricciardo, and 178,294 others
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
twitter:
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
Liked by: oscarpiastri, lilymhe, and 301,185 others
logansargeant & y/n.user: We liked each other and put on a ring on it 💍❤️ And finally got Logan in a race car that had a chassis 🙃😉
view comments…
lilymhe: congratulations guys!!!💓
f1wags: AWWW STOP
user8: this wasn’t on my 2024 bingo card, but i am so here for it
alex_albon: funny joke y/n😐 but congratulations!!!!!
oscarpiastri: not sure why you guys waited so long
lilyzneimer: you’re talking?
y/n.user: aw shit, you tell him lily👏
lilyzneimer: thank you, congratulations btw❣️
*liked by y/n.user*
user3: mother and father🙏😮💨
landonorris: CONGRATSSSSS
maxverstappen1: congratulations! p wants to be the flower girl, i told her i would ask…don’t feel obligated
y/n.user: 🥹tell p yes. she’s the cutest ever
logansargeant: im the cutest ever. but ok
scottjames31: you will soon learn that once you’re married, you aren’t the cutest anymore and kids come first
logansargeant: 😐
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
(reposts, comments, and likes are appreciated ^-^)
#f1#logan sargeant#logan sargeant x reader#logan sargeant x you#logan sargeant x y/n#ls2#ls2 x reader#ls2 smau#logan sargeant smau#ls2 imagine#ls2 fic#ls2 fluff#logan sargeant fluff#f1 smau#smau#fluff#williams racing#williams f1
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The Helena diaz of it all has me fascinated. I’ve said for a long while that Eddie’s real issues are his mommy issues and this episode just cemented for me that we’re gonna explore that and deal with it.
Because it’s Helena who forced Eddie to grow up to fast - because her husband wasn’t around much - so she pushed Eddie into de facto parent and husband role ls - selfishly filling her needs and ignoring the damage it was doing to her son (it is a form of abuse in my book).
Eddie then had the audacity to fall in love with and marry Shannon and get her pregnant. It’s why Helena was always so off with Shannon - she was punishing her. She is also punishing Eddie for all of this and his refusal to return to El Paso only cemented further her bitterness and resentment.
Now she does have Ramon back she doesn’t need Eddie any longer to fill that role so she is still punishing him and part of that is tied into her glee over now getting to parent Christopher - something she has always been intent on doing the doppelgänger just gave her the opportunity- as well as allowing her to further punish her son and his love of Shannon.
Her barbed comments about building a pool were all about showing what she can provide Christopher - how she is parenting him better than Eddie - it’s part of her mind games - making Eddie feel like more of a failure as a parent to his son.
The reality of course is that the reverse is true - Helena’s parenting is all superficial, flash and showy - it isn’t the hard day to day parenting when things get tough and you have to be the bad guy. While Eddie has made mistakes, there is nothing superficial, flash, or showy about his parenting. It’s why bucks comments about Eddie being a great dad are so important.
Eddie feel like a failure right now and that he is entirely to blame for everything. But in reality, while he does bear a bit of the responsibility, the truth of the matter is that he needs to learn and deal with the fact that all of it actually stems from Helena and her abuse of her young son - Shannon never stood a chance just like Eddie never has.
#genuinely don’t see how she can get any sort of redemption arc#but this is 911 so maybe they’ll find a way 🤷🏻♀️#Helena’s treatment of Eddie is a form of child abuse - it has done so much damage to him psychologically#I do really hope we finally get to meet Sophia and adriana as part of this arc beciase I think it might be very revealing#I am also wondering if Ramon had a stache in the past - and that is what Eddie is subconsciously trying to mimic#and that is about him trying to regain his mothers affection - trying to fill that husband role she forced him into#and that shaving it off is a part of his dealing with that and choosing to free himself from her clutches#and in doing that - standing up for himself etc - it will be the trigger that v ring schristopher back#the catholic guilt and Eddie’s queerness is also all tied up in this - the church reinforces and condones Helena and her actions#the Catholic Church has a long history of abuse of children in all it’s horrendous forms#so Eddie seeking solace in that direction think it will help him find away back to Helena’s good books only for it to open a few doors he#has bolted shut#as for the queer aspect - forcing Eddie to grow up too fast and fill this role of husband to his mother and parent to his siblings means#Eddie never got the chance to learn who he actually is - to explore his sexuality and all that goes with that - at the age one normally#would - as a teenager and into your 20’s. it explains so much around his relationship with Shannon and dealing with the helana of it all#and the queerness of his identity - will also allow him to actually let Shannon go#Eddie’s arc is going to be incredible - heartbreaking and gut wrenching - but incredible#Helena diaz it’s on sight - she is evil and cannot be redeemed in my eyes!#911 spoilers#Thinky thoughts#eddie diaz#911 abc
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LET ME LOVE YOU 【SHARKY】
【Summary】 ; Finding yourself dragged in to join a video with the beta squad, you meet Sharky. You've promised before that you wouldn't fall for anyone anymore after all you've been through. But now that he's popped up in your life, maybe you're slowly breaking your promise.
【Warnings】 ; slow build, reader has a description of a past abusive (more toxic than abusive) relationship and insecurity, mentions of trauma from it, slow brains to comprehend feelings, words: "damn", "bastard", "Shit" are used, Sharky being a jokeman.
【Pairing】 ; Sharky x f!Reader
【Word Count】; hehe 15k !!
【A/N】 ;Hope you all enjoy this, and it did take a while, so please let me know what you all think about it ! @vctrvn-ls thank u so much for scenario ideas and motivation when I felt like my brain was fried, and @allygatcr for hyping me up for this fic 🫶🫶 and all my mutuals who have long awaited this fic I love u all !
Masterlist
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The cold, cool air of the summer breeze hit your face as you stared out the window of the moving car.
Chin leaning on your hand as you watched houses and landscapes moved past your eyes in a speedy manner.
You didn't know what to expect in this upcoming event you were attending, well not a big event but a video that was shooting.
It was your first collaboration with other youtubers as you yourself was an upcoming one. Well you were more a guest than a collaboration but that's what you liked to call it.
Being nervous was an understatement, you didn't know what to expect but all you could do was hope for the best. Knowing the Internet could do anything after the video was posted was what made you more nervous, you hope things go your way and all but is that really realistic?
"You better not be over there being worried about the whole thing Y/N." A voice spoke beside you, one who was driving the car you were in.
Turning to roll your eyes at him, Aj just shook his head, hand still on the steering wheel as he continued speaking, since you didn't say anything.
"Cmon, I told you it's all good. These guys are my trusted friends and good collabs too. It'll help you a lot. And maybe get over your fear of…" He trailed off, glancing to your side as he faked a cough to quickly recover from what he was originally going to say, "You know what I mean. I'm telling you right now it's all good."
"It better be." You mumbled, still staring out the window of the car trying to calm your nerves down. Sure, Aj tried giving you a pep talk, but right now, it wasn't really working. Still, you appreciated what he did for you.
Aj was one of your family friends, you both have known each other since you were really young and both grew up together. He was the older brother that you never had. Throughout your childhood, you would be able to count on his triangle head.
Even though you'd both insult and tease each other, you still cared and were thankful.
And being the good friend Aj was, he saw how you were trying to become a bigger youtuber. But he knew you were afraid to expand and get to know more people than your small circle of ones you already knew.
So, he told you about the beta squad and how he and his friends created this group, where they make videos together and live in the same house. They do collabs with others too to make their videos more fun and interesting when there's guests.
He invited you, despite you saying you were fine by yourself, he insisted that it would be fun. And now here you are, on your way to the beta squad house to film a video with some people you don't know.
Except the short triangle head.
"If things don't go great, I'm heading straight back to this car, Aj." Sitting up straight and turning your head to him as you spoke.
You could tell he was contemplating whether or not to say some insult or snappy remark back, but in the end, he just nodded and said alright.
The driving came to a slow as the car approached the driveway of the house. The house itself was actually impressive. You thought maybe it would not be the best-looking house you'd seen with Aj living in it, but clearly, you're wrong.
I mean, what did you expect? They live in a mansion for crying out loud. You thought to yourself, as if hearing you, Aj laughed and commented on that thought.
"Yep, this place cost a sh' ton of money, but it's worth it." He spoke as he parked the car and turned off the engine. Looking for his keys to open the front door.
You laughed, finding the key on the front window of the car and handing it to him "Okayy mind reader shabeel. Thanks for the info."
He rolled his eyes in response and exited the car, causing a laugh to escape you again. Taking your phone out of your pocket, you looked at the time as it read, 4:30pm. The video was scheduled to start preparing to shoot at 5:00pm.
You got out of the car and shut the door, following Aj to the front of the house as he unlocked the door with some passcode at which he told you to "look away I don't want you breaking into this house"
And then proceeding to use the key to unlock the front door.
Stepping inside the house, it was cooler than outside, probably because of the air conditioning, and the mansion was huge, bigger inside than what it looked like outside.
Cold marble flooring that matched the white of the walls. Taking a look around the house, you noticed posters of all the beta squad, sitting on their thrones and wearing royal king crowns, following with their names beneath the poster.
You admit this place is starting to look really cool, and the fact that all of them are still quite young and can afford a house like this amazes you. Perhaps one day you'd be able to do the same.
Sniffing, you smelt a savoury aroma enter the room, you guessed, coming from the kitchen as you imagined the delicious food being cooked.
But your attention to food was taken away when you heard a ringtone coming from Aj's phone.
Glancing at it, he started to speak, "I gotta take this sorry, you can go ahead and sit on the couch or take a look around. Sharky might be at home right now, too."
Before you could question further where the sitting room was, he already was on the call, speaking to someone and walking out the door outside to the carpark.
You sighed, putting a hand on your hips, guess you had to explore now.
Thankfully, you found the giant couch without too much effort. As there was a glass door in front of you, beside the posters you were looking at earlier.
Speed walking up to the couch and plopping onto it, you felt the comfort of it instantly sink in, you felt like you were in your own bed that's how comfortable it was.
You pulled your airpods out of your pocket and connected it to your phone as you put them into your ears to listen to some music to pass the time a bit.
Going into Spotify to find your most trusted thing, your music playlists.
Pressing shuffle, you were glad one of your favourite songs popped up, "Thinkin' bout you." By Frank Ocean.
You listened to a lot of music artists and you never really had a favourite, but whenever you did listen to Frank Ocean it's just something about the lyrics that always touched you. Either they were too real or too sad and it made the songs more enjoyable. Or they were also just a good beat to be honest.
Humming along to the song, you foot tapped to the beat, following along with your head in sync. As you scrolled through your phone to find something to do, quietly singing the song that played through your airpods.
Cause I been thinking 'bout forever, ooh
Most of the time, you could almost dance to the music when you were alone but here, you were content with just tapping your foot along with the beat.
No, I don't like you, I just thought you were cool enough to kick it
You started humming along to the words, enjoying the beat of the music.
Got a beach house I could sell you in Idaho, since you think
Now the music had taken over and you were singing along to the music, not singing too loud but enough to not classify it as a whisper.
I don't love you I just thought you were cute, that's why I kissed you
Got a fighter jet, I don't get to fly it though I'm lying down
Too lost in the music, you failed to hear the footsteps approaching beside you. You jumped slightly as a hand tapped your shoulder, causing you to remove one of your airpods and look up to see who it was.
"Hey, sorry for startling you. I just wanted to come over and say hi, You're Y/N, right? The guest today?"
You were greeted by dark chocolate eyes that were connected with a smile. A pretty face, you'll be honest. And he was tall. Damn, he was tall. Like 6 foot something, definitely. He had a good sense of style, wearing a grey backwards hat and matching hoodie and joggers that had a logo, Primo on it.
Still hooked on the fact that this beautiful man was standing in front of you. Were you daydreaming again?
Maybe you were observing him for too long, as he waved a hand in front of your face with a small chuckle.
"Oh! sorry, yes, I'm Y/N, I didn't mean to stare.." You internally punched yourself in the brain. He didn't have to know you were staring. Why did you say that out loud? You frickin idiot. You still haven't even turned off your music yet.
You paused the music on your phone and it caused an excited gasp to escape from the man in front of you, confused you looked back up at him to see him smiling with excitement as he was looking at your phone.
"Oh my days, you listen to Frank Ocean? Do you like his music?" He came over to sit beside you, still excited like a little kid who just made a friend for the first time.
You gave a slight giggle as you nodded, "I don't just like his music, I love his music. It's just something about the way his songs are always so real."
"Yeah, it's so relatable, and the way his lyrics are raw, it just makes it more enjoyable, you know?" He added, nodding while he talked and listening to you intently.
"I know, right? Honestly, one of the best music artists I know." You agreed, a small smile dusting your face as you talk about the one thing you enjoy, music.
He chuckled, "The greatest of all time," he stopped for a bit before asking, "What's your favourite song of his?"
"Ohh, it's hard to say because I love them all." You looked away to ponder for a minute, trying to differentiate which of his songs you would classify as a 'favourite.' No one really asked that before, too, so you never really had to think about it. "Honestly, I can't choose."
"Cmon, you have to have one that you could listen to forever."
You thought for a bit, "Hm, but if I had to have one, I'd say this song I'm listening to right now, Thinkin Bout You."
"Ohh, that song is so good, I'd say mine is Pink and White, only because I've been listening to it a lot." He admitted, one hand in the air as he said that last statement with a grin.
It's been a while since you've been able to connect and talk to someone about interesting topics you enjoy. You felt so welcomed, and something about him just warmed your heart, always managing to put a smile on your face every next sentence he spoke.
You could tell he was an open person, someone you could trust. This feeling you get of trust and instant friendship is rare and hard to find, and when you do find it, you've heard that you shouldn't lose it. It's a once in a lifetime chance.
Suddenly, he face palmed and mumbled an 'I'm so dumb,' "Sorry I forgot to introduce myself, I'm Sharky." He held a hand out to you to shake. You took it automatically and with a smile.
"Y/N L/N." Wait, you didn't even register what his name was for a second, and then it just clicked. "Sharky? Like a shark? Is that a nickname?"
"Aha, yeah, that's what I'm nicknamed as my actual name is Sharmarke. It's just that's what I'm better known as." He scratched the back of his neck while looking to the side, a small pink dusting his cheeks.
You were about to ask more on that before you heard more voices enter the room. Both of you turned your heads to see what you assumed was the beta squad, and some camera crew entered.
Sharky turned to you and smiled, "We can talk after, I think we're about to start. These are the rest of the beta squad." He said, standing up and pointing to the four guys. You followed his line of sight and saw them waving at the both of you.
Getting up and coming over to greet them all, you introduced yourself to the three and got their names as Niko, Kenny, and Chunkz. You were about to comment on the last one's name before he put up a hand and pointed to all of himself as his explanation to which he gave a laugh.
The camera crew set up everyone, placing mics on them and doing sound checks on everyone. Putting cameras in two rooms, one for the main video and the other for another part of the video, the part where an individual talks to the camera themselves.
Now you saw that everyone had put on their silly costumes and understood why Aj had asked you previously to bring something too.
You had brought a red riding outfit since it was the only costume-like thing that you had owned. You changed into that, and you went to check out everyone's costumes, or if you didn't know what it was, you asked them.
Kenny was dressed as bigfoot, Chunkz as "Prince of Saudi Arabia", Niko as Sharky, well more specifically a Shark biting him, Sharky as a black viking and Aj a sheep. Quite accurate, you thought with a small giggle.
The lighting in each room took a while to set up as it had to change throughout the video. Green and red lights were the two colours. While getting mic'd up, Niko explained to you the video they were shooting.
A game called Mafia.
"So basically, there's 6 players, 6 cards, 2 for the mafia, 4 for the civilians. The cards are picked at random by all players. The mafia share their identity with each other, while the others close their eyes and are left in the dark. All players open their eyes, and the game is on." Niko spoke as they finished up the sound and led you all to the mafia game room upstairs. He continued to explain the game to you while also showing you a clip of the previous videos on how to play.
"The civilian's job is to find the mafias and get them out. They need to work together in catching these two and not letting them take over. The only problem is they don't know what card everyone else has. The mafia's job is to make all the civilians turn on each other and eventually vote each other out, making them the only remaining players."
"And at the end of every round, one person will be voted out and punished by being dunked into a tank of freezing water, the victim will then reveal their card showing the rest of the players whether they made the right choice or not." Aj laughed as he told you that this was his favourite part of the game. He just hoped he wasn't the one being dunked in the tank.
Everyone sat down in their respective places on the couch. You sat down next to Aj, obviously because he was the closest to you, following Chunkz beside Aj, Niko, and Kenny beside him. Leaving one space beside you, Sharky took that place with a smile on him.
"So the game ends when either both mafias are caught or all civilians are outnumbered and voted out, right?" You asked no one in particular, but they all nodded and that you now understood how the game was played.
You'll admit it does sound fun. You've never heard of this game before, but if it's as fun as it sounds, it probably would end up being one of your favourite games. And as Aj told you before your chance to get over your fear. You don't like being reminded about it, but just for a while, you didn't have to remember.
Looking around the grey but well lit room, you noticed an LED light sign that read "Mafia" in blue, and playing cards that had each beta squad member on it as a king or joker etc.
The camera director told you all it was starting in 1 minute, causing the chatter to cease as quickly so that they could start filming. You glanced to your side as Aj nudged you, giving you a thumbs up and mouthing an "you'll do great," to which you whispered a thanks.
Seeing this interaction, Sharky leaned in towards you but respecting your space and also whispered, "Don't worry, Y/N, it'll be fun." He smiled at you when he saw that the nerves in your face calmed down a little after both of the reassurance you've gotten.
"Camera rolling!" The cameraman shouted.
Aj was the first to speak, "Welcome to another game of Mafia! Please welcome our new guest, drum roll, please!" Everyone was hitting the table to sound a drum roll as they then all pointed at you, "Y/N L/N!" You waved at the camera and thanked everyone.
"Now that we've introduced her, it's time to pick the cards." Sharky glanced at you for a split second when he spoke, before reaching to grab the cards, everyone following suit to do the same.
If the cameras didn't pick it up, then you surely did when you both made eye contact with each other after looking at your card, which was the mafia card. The King. Why did you look at Sharky first after looking at your own card? You really don't know the reason for it. But you couldn't ponder any longer as you had to win this game.
Chunkz did the honour of telling everyone to put down their cards and close their eyes.
"Mafias! Open your eyes." Chunkz said cheekily while dragging out the 'eyes.'
Slowly, you opened your eyes and looked around, trying not to make any noise when you turned as you were still wearing your hood over your head.
Looking towards your right, not Aj, not any of the other boys so that must mean, as you turned your head to the left, you met eyes with Sharky, who smiled instantly and slowly nodded his head while you gave him a smile back.
"Mafias, close your eyes." Chunkz shouted, which caused the both of you to turn your heads back and shut your eyes. "Everyone, open your eyes."
When you opened your eyes, for some reason, you just couldn't hold in your smile. You were excited, genuinely. This already seems fun.
Aj must have caught on to this because he instantly went to attack you on that. "Nah, why you smiling Y/N, are you Mafia?"
"What? Can I not smile?" Damn it, where you about to get caught already? The game just started ain't no way you're letting them think you're mafia.
"Smiling is a bit suspicious, you know? I'm getting mafia vibes from Y/N." Aj turned around to the rest of the guys and pointed at you, who faked being shocked and hurt.
"Wow Aje, you know, you thinking I'm mafia without any other grounds other than me smiling is suspicious in itself. I'm thinking you're targeting me because you're mafia." You stated as a matter of fact, to which the others nodded.
"That does sound like Aj when he's mafia." Kenny said, rubbing his chin while looking at Aj with distrust.
"Yo HOW blud. She's trying to trick you all against me." Aj shouted as he threw both of his arms in the air to prove his point.
"Yeah, I think we should just vote Aj out. Personally, I don't like mafia infested rats." Niko laughed as he looked at the camera saying those last words.
"So all in favour of voting out, Aj?" Sharky spoke now, looking around the room as he raised his hand to see who would follow, and everyone did but Aj, causing the shorter man to stand up and leave, mumbling an "I hate you guys" making the rest of you laugh.
All of you were led outside and were about to watch Aj be dunked into a tank of freezing water. You laugh as you remember Aj saying earlier that the forfeits were his favourite part of the video, oh how the tables have turned for him.
Niko was the one to throw at the dart target board for Aj, he missed the first few times but when he finally made it, seeing Aj's face as he dropped in the water was one that made everyone burst into laughter and excitement.
As he got out of the tank, the boys shouted "Show your card" And when he did, it showed a 5 of spades. Everyone just groaned in disappointment.
"YOU LOT WASTED YOUR TIME, MAFIAS STILL OUT THERE." Aj yelled as he ran back into the house to change out of his now freezing cold clothes.
Obviously everyone knew Aj wasn't the mafia but if he was that would've been great, 1 out. But realistically they just wanted the rat gone. Kenny pointing a suspicious finger at you after Aj showed his card to everyone.
You glanced at Sharky, sending him a quick, worried look as you saw Kenny tell Niko his suspicions. And you both knew what you had to do in the next round.
As everyone sat down, Chunkz was the first to speak, "Now automatically I'm smelling Niko vibes." He giggled afterwards as a shocked and confused look went on Nikos face.
"What? I've not done anything? You can't always target me because you don't like me."
"Okay so Niko, who do you think is the mafia?" Sharky asked, because he knew that once Niko thought that one of you was the mafia, he would stop at no costs to prove his point and he might even end up winning the game.
"Well, earlier, Kenny told me that it could be Y/N. But I mean, you haven't really done anything that would be mafia suspicious in my eyes. But Chunkz keeps targeting me, so now he's my suspect."
You sighed quietly, hoping no one heard that. At least Niko didn't think you or Sharky were mafia.
"Yeah, actually," you started to speak, turning to Chunkz, "Why are you thinking Niko's mafia?"
"Nah, it's because every Mafia, I go for Niko, I just try to show from early that he's not my friend. There's like no coalition."
They all went back and forth with the banter and hurling suspicions left and right and each other, but surprisingly, no one thought you or Sharky were mafia. The only suspects were Niko, Kenny, or Chunkz.
Sure, they suspected you both a few times, but really, they didn't think much of it, as everyone was already pinning it against themselves they didn't have time to suspect you both fully.
Until the last round, Chunkz had been voted off and seeing as his card wasn't a king card the suspicions now turned to you again. Kenny was the first to pounce again on the argument.
"Listen, Niko, I'm thinking Y/N is mafia. One hundred percent, no doubt. But I think Sharky might be the other mafia. I'm not too sure about that."
"Niko, don't listen to him, I promise you, I am not Mafia." You looked at Niko and put on your best innocent face.
"I don't know, to be honest, I'm baffed." Niko threw his hands in the air in confusion and placed a hand over his mouth to think. "Then again, big foot here isn't really giving me much evidence to question on."
"Yeah, but it's not about evidence!" Kenny shouted, and it caused the rest of you to laugh at how serious he's being, even if he was telling the truth, you were a mafia. "Oh my days, Niko, can't you see? They literally are both mafia!"
"Niko man, vote out, Kenny, because clearly he is mafia by trying to lure you in and win. There is one other mafia. I think it's Y/N if not you. At least get one of them out." You turned your head as Sharky spoke those words. You thought he was supposed to work together with you?
But then he sent a sly wink and smile towards your way, if you blinked you would've missed it and then it hit you, if Niko voted our Kenny here, you and Sharky would've won, both the mafias would be left standing winners.
And so when it came to the vote, it started with Kenny voting for you, then it was up to Niko, who looked back and forth between you and Kenny, you pleaded one last time with him.
"Look Niko, if I was mafia I would've been out by now, this is my first time playing. If you think it's me, vote for me by all means but if you just use your brain you could clearly see Kenny is mafia."
And with that, Niko agreed and voted Kenny, leaving you and Sharky to vote for him as well. Instantly after the votes were complete, Kenny stood up and left yelling at the camera as he didn't want to get dunked in water.
But as soon as he did, and when he showed his card making him a civilian, you and Sharky both shouted and jumped with joy, while Niko just stood there mouth agape as he slowly went to cover his mouth still being shocked and the rest of the boys yelled at Niko for being an idiot.
While you and Sharky celebrated, he went up to wrap his arms around you while yelling "We did it!!"
And you laughed along, hugging him back. When you did, it instantly felt comfortable, being in his arms felt safe. You didn't know what it was, why did it make you feel all fuzzy?
It reminded you of your mother's hugs when you were a kid, and you won something, the genuine happiness and excitement you found in that hug reflected Sharky's hug. It felt familiar and you wouldn't admit it if anyone asked you but you could stay in that hug forever.
Maybe you lingered in that hug for a second too long as the others started teasing Sharky, saying ooo, and Chunkz started singing, causing him to let go of you as quick.
After they calmed down a bit, they filmed the outro, and thanked you as their guest, and they allowed you to do the honors of saying, "play the trailer."
After they finished the filming, you grabbed your belongings, and headed towards the bathroom to change out of your red riding outfit.
Just as you were about to enter, you heard your name being called, you turned your head to see Sharky running up to you with a wave.
When he finally reached you, you gave him a small smile to which he returned it and then rubbed the back of his neck while looking away.
"Hey, I just wanted to ask if you'd like to hang out sometime?" Sharky asked, a small cough erupting out of him at the end of his sentence. As he gazed back at you with those same soft brown eyes.
You were about to say sure, but then you hesitate. Why did he want to hang out with you? Did he mean romantically or platonically? And if you were about to fall in love again, you didn't know how you would feel about it. The last relationship you had, let's say … didn't end nicely.
But you were thinking too far ahead, for now you could make friends. And you always stick to the same branch of people that you hang out with, and these guys all seem really nice, and Sharky did have the same interest as you in music so why not?
"Sure, I'd, uh, I'd like that." You hated that against your own will. Your cheeks started to burn a little. You just hoped it wasn't noticeable to him.
"Yes!" He did a mini punch in the air but then realised what he did and scratched his head and cleared his throat, "I mean, that's great. Could I get your number? If you're okay with that, that is?"
Nodding, he quickly took out his phone and handed it to you, and you typed in your number, putting your contact name in too. He waited patiently as you did and when you handed it back to him, he called the number and the phone in your pocket buzzed.
He smiled and thanked you, "Hey, you know we make a good team. You actually did really well for your first mafia game."
"We do," You laughed, "you guys should invite me more on your mafia videos."
Sharky was about to say something when Aj yelled, "Hey lovebirds! I gotta drop Y/N back off so be quick and finish your conversation!"
Your eyes widened, Lovebirds?? Oh hell no, Aj's not getting away with that, you mumbled under your breath. Glancing up at Sharky to see his reaction he had the same reaction as you, but he just rolled his eyes and smiled at you saying that he'll leave you to it and pointed at the clothes you were holding. He waved as left to head towards the group.
Going into the bathroom and shutting the door, you looked at the mirror. Damn it, you were blushing. Shaking your head, this was gonna be a long car ride.
When you were done changing, you walked towards the door, where Aj was standing, waiting for you on his phone, when he looked up at you he rolled his eyes and said finally.
"Alright, I'm gonna drop Y/N off. See you guys later!" He yelled into the house, causing the boys to yell out a bye to you, and Niko popped around the corner to shake your hand and say bye to you.
"By the way, Y/N, all that banter that we said earlier, that was just for the video, so don't mind it." Niko admitted, waving a hand off towards Aj, who just laughed as he agreed with him, and then you both left to head to the car.
"So, what was that all about, ay?" Aj teased, as he had a smug grin on his face. As he glanced over at you, who was there looking straight ahead on the road, trying to avoid this conversation.
"I don't know what you're talking about." You shrugged, crossing your arms over your chest.
"Y/N, cmon, don't think I didn't see that idiot Sharks flirt with you."
"Flirt? I don't think he was flirting, he was just being friendly. We just met after all."
"Nah, he definitely was. Knowing Sharks, he just sucks at flirting. Actually," he started as he turned into the street you lived in. "Yeah, maybe he might just be friendly. But I'll be honest, it looked like flirting to me, Y/N. So just be careful. Don't want him breaking your heart or vice versa aight?"
You scoffed. Aj was definitely overreacting with this. But it did make you think, was he really flirting with you? Or was he just being overly friendly. You hoped it was the latter, though. You don't think you could handle a relationship right now.
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He watched as the car drove away, and when he turned around, he was frightened to see Chunkz looking at him with a sly smirk on his face. He just rolled his eyes as he made his way towards the couch, Chunkz following him as he continued to pester the other Somali.
"Oh my days, I know I made it so awkward. You know how awkward that was? I'm not good with girls at all." Sharky covered his face with hands as he slouched down onto the couch and sighed.
"You seemed fine when you hugged her." Chunkz did his famous laugh, as he went to sit beside Sharky.
"Stop, man, that was just -" Sharky cut himself off. What was that hug actually? Shaking his head, he cleared his throat as he pulled out his phone to ignore looking at Chunkz. "A winning hug. Like I hug all of you when we win a game."
"A winning hug? Sharky, you're a joke man. I know you fell in love instantly, bruva." He elbowed his friend as he laughed in his face. Causing the fellow Somali to pull over his hood to cover his face, which started to warm up.
Fell in love instantly? Sharky's not like that. Or was he? He didn't know at this point, just the very thought of you got his face heating up and the flutter of wings in his stomach grew out of nowhere. You've got him second-guessing himself. Usually, he's a confident guy, but now.
Now, he's definitely not.
Sharky was in the kitchen when he first saw you, he was making something to eat while waiting for the guys to arrive back at the house, but that's when he saw you walk toward the couch and sit there like you owned the place.
He was about to ask who you were, but then he remembered there was a guest for today's video. Normally, he would just call out loud and make his presence known, but he was caught off guard by your singing or, well, whispering the words to a song.
A song to which he also listened to.
He started to smile after hearing the words to the song you were singing. He leaned back against the counter to listen, but he then decided it would be a bit weird if he just stood there listening to you without you knowing, and that's how he decided to confront you.
As he moved closer to you, he realised how pretty you were. Like genuinely pretty, stunning even. The way your face smiled in that look of content as you listened to the music and-
Oh no. Maybe Chunkz was right.
You head down the stairs to make your breakfast. It was about a week since you met the beta squad. And you were currently at home. You just finished getting ready to go on your morning run.
Usually, you don't go on runs in the morning as you'd sleep in, but for some reason, you had the urge to just get up and exercise.
As you were making your breakfast, a classic bowl of cereal and toast, your phone buzzed on the table. Turning your head, you stopped making the cereal and opened your phone, and checked the notifications.
A big smile cracked on your face against your will as you read the text from Sharky.
Message sent at 8:16 am
Sharky 🦈
Good morning 👋🏻
I was thinking, do you wanna … maybe hang out today?
IF YOU'RE NOT BUSY THAT IS😅
You 💟
Morning Sharky !
Nah I'm not busy, where do you wanna go?
Sharky 🦈
Hmm, wherever you want! I don't mind honestly 😁
You 💟
Ok, how about let's meet up in the park since I'm gonna go on a run there anyway and we'll see where it goes from there 😂
I'll see you at 9
Sharky 🦈
👍
See you then ❤️
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You stared at the message he last sent, "See you then ❤️"
Oh my days, you're going nuts over a heart emoji? You thought, internally slapping yourself, but you can't help but look over the message, and then you shook your head. Get yourself together, you send hearts to everyone, why did it surprise you when he did?
Finally taking the pieces of toast, and finishing off your cereal. You ate as quickly as you could, as soon as you finished it you grabbed your house keys and headed out to the park.
Locking your door, you put on your headphones and play your music playlist. You start to jog towards the park. You were thinking of running, but maybe you'll save that last bit of energy when you're closer to the park.
It was a chilly morning, the cool, crisp air hitting your body, but not enough to make you freeze, especially since you were jogging.
You don't remember the last time you jogged, maybe a few weeks or months, who knows at this point. Perhaps the conversation you had with Aj last time slightly may have hinted that Sharky does like his runs in the morning.
Is that what motivated you to run? Or was it just the fact that you haven't been out in a while?
The warmth hit you as soon as you closed in near the park. It wasn't that far from your house, maybe about 20-24 minutes.
You reached the entrance of the park, the soft scent of the array of flowers surrounded the area, and the tall trees moved with the gentle breeze.
People walked around the park, and some kids played as they ran around the park, chasing each other and shouting with joy when they caught up.
Nearing a bench, you sat down and pulled out your phone, checking the time, 8:42 am.
Maybe he was here already?
You hesitated. Should you call or text him? You ended up calling Sharky to see if he was here already or not. The phone rang twice before he picked up the phone.
"Hey Y/N, I'm at the park where are you?" Sharky's voice spoke through the phone.
"Just near the entrance, I'm sitting at a bench, uh," looking around, you tried to describe your surroundings, "near this really tall tree."
You heard him laugh softly through the phone, instantly causing you to smile and ask, "What's so funny?"
"Nah, it's because you said you're near this really tall tree, but Y/N, there's trees everywhere." He laughed again, making you roll your eyes but still have a smile on your face.
You ended up sending him your location, and he followed it, finally making his way as he caught sight of you sitting on the bench.
He stood there for a split second because call him crazy if you will, but he swore he saw some light shine upon you as the trees moved their way to do so. He softened his gaze, as the scene in front of him seemed like a movie.
It was a chilly day, yes, but somehow the sun came around just as he arrived. And especially when he saw you, the trees, sunlight and wind might have been paid actors if it wasn't for the fact that they're not people.
"Is this seat taken?" A familiar voice spoke as you looked up and met eyes with Sharky, who smiled as soon as you did. You motioned for him to take the seat beside you, and he gladly did.
The sounds of the park all muffled out, no person walking past, the rustle of trees in the breeze or even the cars on the far side could be heard as you drowned out all noise to listen to the Somali in front of you.
As you both talked, you ended up deciding to head to a cafe nearby, just to grab a drink, to talk and get to know each other. The walk wasn't that far and it was a small cafe.
A blue and white awning hung over the entrance and window of the shop, the inside was decorated nicely with tables and chairs surrounding the room. The warmth from the coffee being made radiated throughout the cafe, and the smell of baked goods added to it.
Both of you waited in line to order your drinks and pastries if you were feeling like it. You stared at the menu board behind the counter, looking at what to order. They had a wide range of drinks and food. Checking the prices beside them surely they couldn't be-
Why the hell are they so expensive??? You thought a small cafe like this would surely have good prices, but this was insane. £6.80 for a coffee? Crazy. And that was the cheapest thing there.
"What ya thinking of getting?" Sharky asked, leaning down to ask while still keeping his eyes on the menu board. You looked up at him briefly and made eye contact, causing you to turn your head swiftly back to the menu and pretend to look at it.
"Hmm, I was thinking of getting just the coffee because it's the cheapest thing there." You scoffed, shaking your head at the insane prices of this place.
"Just coffee? You could get something else too. You know I'm paying right?" He blurted that out like you were supposed to know that already, a giant grin forming on his face. You raised your brows, surprised.
"No, it's alright," you waved him off, "I can pay for my own one."
"Cmon Y/N, I insist." He started to grab his wallet from back pocket, but you stopped him by pushing his hand away from reaching it.
"Well, then I insist back?? And I don't want you to waste your money."
"It's not a waste if it's for you, plus I asked to hang out with you today. It's the least I could do." He shrugged, finally managing to reach for his wallet without you stopping him.
You were about to argue on that until he shot you a look, and you ended up rolling your eyes and accepting. Inside, you were grateful. At least your wallet was saved.
"Fine." You sighed. When you looked back at him, he had a smug grin on his face. He looked as if he had achieved the impossible, but he laughed when he saw the frown on your face.
He ordered for the both of you, and you waited for about three minutes before you collected your coffee and a pastry.
Heading over to a table that had two free seats, you sat down across from each other. Sipping your drink as he started a conversation. Turning to face you as he put down his own cup of tea.
"You have a channel, right? What videos do you make?" Sharky asked, genuinely curious since he didn't actually know much about you being an influencer.
"Honestly, I haven't made many videos, just a few prank videos with Aj and some beauty videos. A mix of everything I'd say." Chuckling as you took another sip of your coffee. He nodded at your answer and smiled.
"What else do you like to do then? Do you have any hobbies?" Laying his hand on his chin as his soft eyes met your gaze.
"Um," you ponder for a bit, "I like music, and I sing," you hesitate, scratching the side of your head, "well sometimes."
"Ohh, of course!" He throws his hands up in realisation, "Frank Ocean! So you like singing, that's good to know."
"Maybe one day you could put on a show and sing for me." Sharky's lips curled into a small smile, creasing the outer corner of his eyes. And seeing your face get slightly warmer only made his smile grow wider.
It seemed as if you've talked forever, the way the conversations you've had with him flowed like honey. Almost as if you've known him your whole life, it was almost … comforting.
You don't know how you ended up talking about football, but it led to a conversation with him explaining the basic mechanics and how it's "so easy" even a baby could do it.
"You really don't know how to play football?"
Seeing you shake your head, must've lit a light bulb in his head, as his gaze turned from one of confusion to his sienna brown eyes widening.
"Unacceptable." He shook his head and stood up, taking your hand in his as he left you out of the cafe.
By the looks of the sky, it was evening already, the sun slowly setting as the sky painted a canvas of light orange hues and yellow rays.
You laughed, still holding on to his grasp, "Where are we going?" As he led you both down the street.
Your laugh rang in his ears, a small thing motivating him to stay by your side. It was angelic. You may not have thought so, but to him, if his heart had melted from it, he would fix it all up just to hear it again.
He brought you to a stadium, a football stadium. The grand entrance of the place staring you in the face as he entered in with some ID card and brought you to the pitch.
"I'm teaching you how to play football." Sharky spoke as he grabbed a nearby football that was lying in a basket full of other ones. Putting one hand on his hips as he beckoned you to come closer.
You were in awe of the stadium, it was huge, and it especially looked amazing in the evening, the peach coloured rays hitting the walls of the stadium emitting a soft hue around the pitch.
"How were you able to even get in?" You inquired of him, slowly walking closer to him as you looked around the stadium.
He led you to the middle of the huge pitch. The whole stadium was empty, except you thought you saw two cleaners, but other than them, it was just you and Sharky on the field.
He grinned, "Perks of being an ex-emirates stadium worker. Plus, I'm a youtuber, they know me." Putting a hand on his chest, as it was something that always deeply touched him.
"So," He started, as he kicked the football to go in front of him, "I'll show you how to kick the football first." He motioned for you to come closer, pointing at his right foot as he told you to kick it with the side of your foot instead of the tip.
He took a few steps back and sped up towards the ball and kicked it just as he showed you, evidently making a goal.
Earning a cheer from you, to which he gave a small bow, running up to get the ball back and placing it in front of you. "Now you try." He placed his hands on his hips as he waited for you. You looked at him as your face contorted into one of confusion.
"Uh, I don't think I'll be able to score a goal just like that? "
"Well, try it first then you can complain." He laughed, ushering you forward towards the ball, you looked at him and then back at the ball.
'Well here goes nothing' you thought and tried to kick as Sharky showed you, but you ended up only kicking it more than a meter away from you, and heading off to an angle to your right.
You heard a small snort come from Sharky as he tried not to laugh at that kick, earning an embarrassed chuckle from you, as you tried to shorten yourself from this situation.
Making Sharky feel bad so he put on a smile for you, to make you feel less awkward about this, he really did want you to learn and he has tons of patience so this would be really easy he thought.
"Yeah, maybe we should practice other things before goals. I realised that may be a bit difficult." He rubbed his chin, thinking of what to do next and his brows raised as it came to him.
He moved towards the storage room and brought out a few cones, placing them in a row in front of you, measuring the width of the spacing between each cone with his own body, he placed six cones in a row.
Taking the ball back and bringing it near the both of you, he started to move it between his feet, looking up at you as he did.
"So what I'm doing right now is called dribbling." Slowly moving towards the cones, the football still between his feet as he demonstrated going around the cones left and then right, up until the very end where he repeated it again heading back to you.
"Dribbling is basically just moving the ball between your feet, like kicking it a little."
Passing the ball to you as you stopped it with your foot, the small of your lips turning upwards, "You could practice by going around each cone and coming back to me here."
You nodded, placing it between your feet, moving closer to the cones as you tried to kick it back and forth between your feet, but it's easier said than done. As you tried but ultimately failed, crashing into the cones as you almost tripped over the ball, trying to go through the cones.
Causing a small laugh to come out of Sharky, as he walked over to you and extended a hand to help you up. He put the cones back in their place and let you try again, repeating to you how to do it as he watched you try to dribble between the cones. Evidently crashing into them again, at least it wasn't all of them this time.
After a couple more training sessions (more like failed attempts) you managed to do somewhat of a decent job at dribbling and sometimes you scored a goal. Almost always you earned a high five from Sharky, even if you did fail an attempt, he'd just smile and say we can try again. Never did he sigh and give up.
࿙ ࿚ ࿙ ࿚ ࿙ ࿚
"Wait, what did you just do right there?" You asked, after he suggested you can take a break, since you seemed out of breath after all the training.
You were kicking the ball back towards the seating area when Sharky quickly kicked the ball from beneath you, taking it back towards him as he tossed it up into his hands.
"This? It's called a nutmeg, you simply just kick the ball through your opponent's legs, to retrieve it back so that they won't have it anymore."
You laughed, sitting down in one of the chairs, gazing up at Sharky as he messed around with the ball. "I thought nutmeg was a spice?"
He furrowed his brows for a split second and then let out a laugh, "Yeah, it is, but that's just the term for it. We're not really cooking here, are we?" Shrugging his shoulders as he went to sit beside you.
A soft silence filled the area, as both you and Sharky didn't speak a word. Even the usual white noise, when things got quiet, couldn't be heard, but instead, a delicate soft breathing between the two of you.
Fiddling with your thumbs as you stared at your feet. When is there ever just silence? Normally overpowering the peace, the sounds would get louder, the steady rhythm of your beating heart, sometimes going off track to stumble you.
But now, it's at ease, the quietness, an instant comfort to soothe your mind and heart. Lifting your head up to look around the stadium, it's not normally quiet in a place like this, but now, now is a rare time.
Sharky was looking at you now, eyes softening at your figure, the way you're peacefully sitting here, content, and the soft breathing from you showing him that you're alright with him being here. Alright, with him being beside you. And that, that's what makes him smile.
"You know what," you say, suddenly standing up and placing your hand on your hips, catching him off guard as he didn't expect you to move suddenly, "Let's do a 1v1."
Sharky squints slightly, uncertainty written upon his face, "Are you sure? It seems a bit unfair from my point of view."
"Are you doubting me?" You scoff, picking up the football that was tossed to the side earlier and holding it in your arms.
He laughed quietly, gazing up at you with his brown doe eyes, "Not at all."
Both of you moved towards the centre of the pitch, placing the ball in the middle of you and Sharky. You glanced up to see he was already looking at you. You thought it was to prepare himself, but something was telling you it was anything but that, behind his eyes. Shaking off the thought and ignoring it, you stood ground and prepared for the 1v1.
"Don't go easy on me." You grinned, winking at that statement.
He pretended to think for a minute but then smirked and locked eyes with you, "Never, don't worry. First, to score wins."
He counted to three, and you both aimed towards the ball, you managed to grab it first but he took it off of you, heading towards the goal while dribbling, you tried to run after him but then you saw that he was about to make a goal.
You remember him doing a nutmeg, earlier and thought maybe this was your ticket to victory, moving closer as you ran beside him trying to get the football.
But as you did, your foot got caught on his ankle causing you to spin. Your eyes widen as you see him fall back and you shut them waiting for impact.
Only when opening them do you find yourself fallen.
on top.
of Sharky.
It was too fast to stop it, and both of you didn't react until it was too late. Landing on his chest, you slowly lifted your head up to see him, his hand reaching to touch the back of his head. Your brows furrowed in worry, and pupils written in fear.
You watched as his gaze instantly shot to you, raising his head just as quick and the same worried expression you had on your face, reflecting his own one. "Are you alright?"
"No! Wait yes, I mean, are you alright? I should be asking you, not the other way around…"
Your voice trailing off, you found yourself frozen in place, a shiver of nervousness hitting your skin. Despite your brains commands to move, your body ignored it.
As part of you wanted to get up, the brain telling you to do so, the common sense in this situation, but your longing heart, the other, just wanted to keep looking into his dark eyes and get lost in them.
Dark chocolate rays fanning out around the bottomless pit of an iris, inky crescent moons trapped by a hazy, black limbal ring.
Those eyes are the colour of every tree in the forest, richer, due to the golden light from dawn to dusk. The warmth of an eternal hearth felt in those deep brown eyes.
Holding eye contact was the strongest thing you could have ever done. An achievement, a rare feeling inside of you bubbling up just waiting to come out.
For a second, you thought you imagined it, but reality hit you as you see his eyes flicker to your lips. Your mind finally taking over the reins, causing your heart to match the speed of the beads of sweat falling down.
You blinked, clearing your throat and getting up off of Sharky. You got up, stumbling, almost tripping on your own foot as you do so. The normal colour of your cheeks suddenly changing to a red hue as the warmth builds up.
Why can't you function properly today?? Placing a hand on your face, you can feel the warmth radiating, no doubt an obvious hue, seeping and shown through, you could not let him see you like this.
His brows knitted together as he took a glimpse at you, and he shifted to sit upwards, What happened? What did I do? Sharky thought, as he observed you, watching as you stood there covering your face with your hands.
Standing up now, rushing to your side, he put a hand on your shoulder as he tried to get your attention, "Are you okay?"
The smoky sound of his voice, making you feel intoxicated. The sound of your heart beating like crazy rang through your ears as you could barely make out the words Sharky was saying. Your breathing, quickening, and uneven, why were you like this?
Sharky didn't know what was happening at this point, he guessed maybe you were a bit overwhelmed with the whole football thing, and tired from all the running. He was worried but he didn't want to overthink it if it was a minor issue.
"Do you want some water?" He offered, handing you an extra bottle of water, he brought with him earlier.
"Uh, yeah…" You accepted, nodding your head frantically and taking the water from him, "Thank you." turning away from him as you drank.
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The night sky was aglow with the bright city lights of London, the shades of navy and black painted across the sky like a giant canvass, and yet the stars fought their way onto this canvass, outnumbering and conveying their glow to the eyes of people.
You were heading home now, and even though you insisted you'd be fine heading back yourself, Sharky wouldn't take no for an answer and made sure that you had to return home safely.
Walking beside each other as a small breeze hits your backs. Sometimes when you walked your hand would brush against his, and your stomach would get butterflies. Causing you to pull your hand back but not enough to make it too obvious.
The touch was electric, one that sent your nervous system to jealousy, but you couldn't help but think about it. The soft touch of his hand, what would it be like to hold it again? But… longer?
Little did you know, he was thinking the exact same thing. Earlier, he did manage to grab your hand, but only for a short spur of the moment. It wasn't technically holding your hand. It was more of a… guiding you.
Sharky wasn't gonna back down this time. He had an amazing time with you. Your laugh, your smile? He really didn't want it to end. Just one day isn't enough time with you.
How did he do it before? How did he manage to take hold of your hand earlier? Maybe it was because he wasn't overthinking back then, but now he was.
I've done way more scarier things, I got this. He reminded himself, taking a deep breath to prepare, hyping up himself as he tried to get rid of the nerves.
3… 2… 1… He reached out for your hand, but you suddenly stopped in your tracks. Turning to face the other way, he retracted his hand.
"This is my stop." You mention, as you came to a stop in front of the pathway of your home.
Shit, Sharky sighed, gaze turning to the floor. There goes that opportunity, he sighed. Why couldn't he have just done it faster?
"Alright… uh, I'm gonna go? Thank you for walking me home, Sharky." You beamed at him, flashing a shy smile as you tried to hug him goodbye.
Clearly, he didn't know it was going to be a hug because he tried to elbow bump or more of a fistbump you instead. You tried to motion to him that it was a hug and he ended up realising it with a laugh, then engulfed you in a hug, wrapping his arms around your waist as you wrapped yours around his shoulders.
"Of course," He spoke just above a whisper into the hug, and smiled to himself, good thing you couldn't see his face right now because if you could, rosy cheeks dusted his face and a wide smile stuck on his face.
If you could stay in this hug, you would, the warmth radiating from it shielding you from the night breeze. The soft fabric of his clothing hugged your figure as it provided comfort in his arms.
As you tried to pull apart, a piece of your jewelry got caught on a stray thread of his jumper, an awkward chuckle coming out the both of you as you attempted to try and just break the thread off of your necklace.
Instead, it just made the thread longer, to which you just resorted to taking off your necklace and handing it to Sharky, giving up on trying to remove the stray piece of thread.
"Just… when you get home, cut it off and give it back when you next see me." You say, a tinge of hope in your voice, hoping that he did want to see you again.
But your worries were gone when you saw him flash you a smile while he gave you a nod, holding your necklace in his hand.
As you both walk your separate ways, you're both thinking, "Why the hell, did I make that awkward?"
Days turned into weeks, and during that whole time, you'd hang out with the beta squad more and more, being in their videos to just movie nights and snacks, which included more time spent with Sharky. He did give back the necklace after a couple days, but from your perspective it looked as if he was busy those couple days.
But in reality, he was debating what day to give it back to you and how. Should it have been a gift he gives you along with the necklace? Or just hand it back to you normally? He did the latter, but it did really mess him up, a flustered mess thinking how he actually had something of yours with him.
Throughout the weeks going by, Sharky invited you to join in his videos, the fans loved you with the beta squad so he thought it would be a great thing to have you on his channel. He said it would be great for your channel too but honestly in his heart, he just craved to spend more time with you.
Every minute with you was precious, every moment and every smile. Hearing your voice, brightened his whole day, yes his heart would race and yes his breathing would be uneven thinking about you. But it didn't matter, none of it mattered as long as he was by your side.
You made everything better, and he knew it, in fact he wished every day would be with you.
He had learned a lot just by hanging out with you for videos or even just football sessions. He loved listening to your voice as you talked about your passions or just random things that came to your mind. He'd often smile as you talked, sometimes not even realising he was staring at your features.
Gazing at you was like daydreaming outside a window, it wasn't much to people on the outside, but to himself, it was something he couldn't stop himself from doing. It was addicting to say the least. You've got him hooked from the start.
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"No. Way. You have to come over right now, spill all the tea."
You let out a laugh, currently you were on a call with your friend, trying to catch up but she realised it wasn't easy to get to know all that's happened through the phone so she arranged for you to meet at her place later today.
She drove to your house, waiting in the driveway as you hurriedly got out of your house, locking the door as you left. And making your way to her car.
The weather wasn't the best, it could've been better but the raindrops hitting against the roof of the car and the floor outside didn't seem that the weather was going to get better anytime soon.
On the way to her place, she started to tell you stuff that's been going on for the past couple of weeks, exciting things and sometimes boring ones, you'd be honest sometimes you could fall asleep to what she says at times.
When you arrived at her house, she got you some warmer clothes and brought you a hot drink. Thanking her as you took a seat on her couch, her following suit.
As soon as she sat down, you knew she was going to ask you what happened in your life so far. Usually, you'd laugh and say nothing much, as she almost basically told her whole life story in the car. But this time, there was something interesting to talk about.
More like… someone.
Explaining the start of when you met Sharky, to the football training, the videos and the hangouts you told her all about the fun, but you also told her about how you couldn't function at times around him.
When you finished telling everything, she put a hand on your shoulder and looked deeply into your eyes, "You're in love, no doubt in my mind."
"Are you joking? In love?" You scoffed, averting your gaze from her to the mug you were holding, sloshing around the liquid inside of it.
"You're so delusional. Can you not see it?" She sighed in exasperation, throwing her head back to lean it against the couch.
"Last time I was in love, it didn't really turn out well." You mumbled an air of melancholy surrounding you as it clouded your features. Placing the cup onto the table as you crossed your arms in front of you and leaning back.
"Hey," She turned to you, nudging you to make you face her, "Your ex was a piece of shit." You let out a small chuckle as she continued. "You didn't ruin anything. He ruined it."
"This Sharky you're talking about clearly isn't like that. From what you're describing to me anyway. And clearly, you like him." She grins, a stupid grin on her face.
"I don't—"
"Look me in the eyes and tell me that again." She cuts you off, glaring and raising one brow at you.
Your mouth snapped shut, pressing into a thin line. She has a point, one that you couldn't argue on, and even if tried, it would make you look stupid.
"C'mon, you can't deny that you didn't like that date." She teased, a knowing smirk lingering on her face as she drank the rest of her coffee.
"What date?" You raised eyebrows surprised, turning to face her.
"You know, where y'all went to a restaurant and then he taught you how to play football after?" She giggled as she saw the look on your face.
You rolled your eyes playfully, shoving her arm slightly, "Stop messing around. We didn't go on a date! It was a friendly hangout. He sees me as a friend for sure."
She gave you a look which said really? Are you kidding me?
"But is that really all he is to you?"
You gulped and thought about it, shifting your gaze to the ground. Your mind suddenly goes back to the past weeks.
When your hand would brush against his, or when his arm would be pushed near yours in a tight space, your heart would race each time without fail, and you'd think about it for days.
Or when he'd speak, his voice warm and calm, like a flowing river, soothing to one's heart. And that's how he made you feel, all warm and fuzzy on the inside, a tingle in your stomach building up.
When you'd happen to look across the room and he was standing there so perfectly, talking about something you couldn't hear with a glimmer in his eyes and the corners of his lips upturned.
And when he'd notice you looking, turning his gaze to your direction and you'd stare into his dark golden eyes, suddenly everything around you would blur out, the voice of someone speaking disappeared, and the sound of your surroundings vanished. And all you'd notice was … Sharky.
"Just date already!" Your friend laughed, cutting you out of your thoughts, shaking your head to focus again.
You would laugh it off, but the truth was that you were scared on the inside. You didn't want it to end up like your last relationship, cold and cut off. But then again, Sharky wasn't your ex. Sharky was a whole different person.
You had promised before that you wouldn't love for a long time, to heal you had said, you roll your eyes at that, you couldn't stay away.
Why? Because here you are catching feelings.
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The talk with your friend really made you think this week, made you think a lot, actually. Maybe you'd try to accept that you've fallen in love, but it's hard when you don't even know if the other person feels the same way.
It's honestly so frustrating, and yet you hate that you love the way he's making you act up like this. It's like a high school girl with a stupid crush.
You don't even know if you've been obvious to him this whole time.
But you had to ignore it, just for today, because right now you were heading to the beta squad house to film a video for Sharky's channel. A general knowledge video is what he mentioned to you.
As you arrived at the house, you were greeted by Niko as he brought you along to the sitting room. Aj, Chunkz, and Sharky were standing there talking to the camera crew.
While you walked in, you caught the eye of Sharky, waving to you as soon as he saw you, of course you waved back, but this time you took more notice of Sharky, specifically the way his eyes lit up as soon as he saw you.
Or maybe it was the way Chunkz elbowed him in the ribs immediately after Sharky waved at you, a knowing smirk on his face as he switched his focus between the both of you.
Niko turned to all of you, reminding you all that the video would start in 10 minutes, "So if you guys need to do anything, now's the time not later."
"Oh! That reminds me we've gotta get the boxes for the challenge upstairs." Sharky added, heading towards the door, but stopping before he reached it, half turning to face you all with a questioning look.
"Anyone gonna help me?"
"We three are a bit busy so," Chunkz stated, Shrugging his shoulders as he put on a cheeky smile. "Y/N can help you with that? Right Y/N?" Chunkz wrapped an arm around your shoulders as he observed his friend's reaction.
You glanced between Chunkz and Sharky, both of them waiting for your answer. You nodded hesitantly before following Sharky upstairs.
There were forfeits to this challenge, most of them being hidden in boxes that you'd have to find out during the recording of the video.
As you both walked towards the room, you hated that your hands started to sweat, and your heart started to race. The silence was deafening to your ears, you wanted to break the silence but what could you say? But you didn't have to worry much as he ended up speaking first.
Sharky cleared his throat as he opened the door, revealing a small room that had a poster covering the walls, some few items scattered around the floor and the stack of boxes, "We don't have to take them all in one go, by the way."
"Obviously not." You giggled, watching as he moved towards the boxes only to stop after hearing your sarcasm.
"Sorry." You groaned, diverting your gaze as you covered half of your face with your hand out of embarrassment.
He rolled his eyes at your response, shaking his head with a small smile.
With your help almost all of the boxes had been brought down in no time, leaving only a couple of things on the bed. You were so focused on actually helping that you hadn’t noticed Sharky walk in whilst you were picking up the cards with the questions on them.
His hand grazed over yours, slightly brushing just the back of your hand, but it was enough to make you freeze and make your heart beat like crazy.
Your mind was all over the place, nervous and flustered. Your gaze darted up and down and all over him, struggling to focus. As you glanced at his face you noticed something different…
He wasn't wearing his usual backwards hat or a durag this time, but just his hair, the way the curls formed faultlessly on top of his head, accentuating the rest of his features. He'd be on the front cover of a modelling magazine, and you could stare at it all day long.
And when he looked at you, oh boy, that's when you knew you were in for it. You can't go back, you've fallen too far ahead now. Those eyes, they hypnotise you, draw you in instantly and it's hard to get out.
"Stop looking at me like that." You half-rolled your eyes, but the corners of your mouth started to curl up against your will.
"Like what?" He chuckled, making your heart skip a beat once again. Genuinely smiling and you could tell he was curious to know what you meant as he leaned just maybe an inch closer than he already was.
When you look at me and it speaks a thousand words when our voices couldn't and when our gaze crosses from a distance, and it fills my heart with comfort.
The way your eyes have that slight crinkle at the corner of them and that makes your face the cutest when you smile and makes my heart skip a beat, all. the. damn. time.
And when those eyes are looking only at me.
"Nevermind," You dismiss him waving a hand, while looking away, missing to see that he frowns, he has that longing behind his eyes to ask what you meant but he knew he shouldn't pry any further, he didn't want to scare you away.
But he had to know. His mind couldn't stop his curious heart, and so he moved without thought, stepping closer towards you and grabbing your waist.
You yelped at the sudden closeness, eyes widening in shock at how close you both were. His face leaning towards yours with longing eyes, his lips slightly upturned at your reaction as your face started burning.
"Tell me." Sharky breathed, his eyes flickering to your lips for a second too long before gazing back into your eyes.
He was too close, too close that you could see all of his features, the small crinkle on the side of his smile, the unrivalled shape of his eyes, making him unique.
And you'd dare say you also saw a small pink dusting his cheeks.
He was too close, too close that you could feel his breath upon your lips, just centimetres away from you.
His lips looked inviting,
craving something from you.
Asking you to complete it, to fill in that emptiness, it so longed for.
Or maybe you were the one that longed for it?
And you watched as it slowly formed into a smile, glancing back up to the eyes of the owner.
You could see that he was inching closer and closer, your heart denying your every wish to stay calm.
Your mind was frightened, scared of the outcome; it was like stepping on glass, afraid to fall into nothingness and yet your heart thrived in it, determined to see through it.
Honestly, you could move, you should move. It was the smart thing to do.
And yet why didn't you move? You could've moved, told him you weren't okay with him being that close.
But you just… couldn't? It was like you were frozen in place, stuck, bound to stay here for eternity.
And so maybe that's why you shut your eyes slowly.
Waiting to accept the invitation.
But the creaking of a door opening made both of you jump and pull away, swiftly turning your heads to see who it was.
Niko raised his eyebrows, glancing back and forth between the two of you, "Am I interrupting something here?" His mouth formed into a thin line as he scratched the back of his neck, silence dawning upon his answer.
Only until a cough came from Sharky, did Niko return back to his normal self, disregarding what he said earlier and advancing towards the middle of the room, lifting a box, "Guys, we're starting the shoot in 3 minutes and you both didn't even bring down one last box?"
Walking to the door before turning to the two of you, "By the way, when I said earlier, if you have something to do, do it now. This is not what I meant." He laughed, bolting downstairs not to see yours or Sharky's reaction.
Sharky rolled his eyes, scoffing as he couldn't help but let a smile sneak on his face, as he placed his hands in his pockets. "We better head back down, I guess."
You nodded, swallowing the nerves as you took the cards back into your hands, walking beside Sharky downstairs, avoiding any contact with him.
Throughout the whole video, your mind just couldn't focus. Your thoughts going back to earlier, what would have happened if Niko didn't walk in? What would you have done if he didn't? Was Sharky even trying to kiss you and you were just delusional?
Aj kept snapping his fingers in your face every time he noticed you weren't focusing. People who would watch the video would think he's just being his usual Aj self, but in reality, he was worried.
Worried that maybe something happened, and you were going back to not feeling like your usual self.
He hated that time, he hated whenever his friends felt at their worst. He knows because he's felt that same way before, and to feel it multiple times? There's nothing worse.
And so after the video, he went up to you, to see if you were alright. He caught up to you, right as you were about to leave the house, calling out your name.
"Ay Y/N, why you leaving so fast? Are you alright?" Worry surrounded his voice as he placed a hand on your shoulder.
"I'm okay Aje, thanks." You chuckled nervously, "Just uh, tired, yeah..." Scratching the back of your neck as you glanced away.
You hoped he hadn't seen the way you tried to avoid Sharky, or the glances you took during the video, causing your heart to race every second you did.
"Thanks for having me, tell that to the boys alright?" You gave Aj a small smile, patting him on the shoulder as you pointed towards the door with your thumb, indicating you were gonna leave, stepping out the door.
"How are ya gonna get home?" He shouted after you, still at the door, watching as you walked towards the driveway.
Turning around, you pulled out your phone in your pocket showing it to him, "Uh, I'll just call a taxi." You waved at him as you left.
As soon as you turned round the corner, where the eyes of the houses were gone, you took a deep breath, trying to steady it, as you wiped your sweaty hands. You cursed under your breath, How'd one guy get you messed up like this?
࿙ ࿚ ࿙ ࿚ ࿙ ࿚
Aj closed the door when you were out of sight, as he turned towards the sitting room where the rest of his friends were. But he stopped in his tracks, a light bulb flickering in his head as he remembered something.
He scoffed as he peered inside the room, showing Sharky, Chunkz and Niko, having a conversation around the table, sitting back with their phones in their hands.
When he turned to head to the kitchen, Aj heard Sharky's voice call out to him as he glanced back and saw Sharky walk up to him.
"What's up Aj?" Sharky asked, darting his gaze around the room, it's as if he was looking for something, "Where's Y/N?"
Aj raised a brow, something clicking in his head, as he eyed the taller man in front of him. He placed his hands in his pockets as he spoke.
"She left." Aj started, squinting his eyes at Sharky as he continued to speak, suspicion drawing in his voice, "But I was just thinking, Sharks, what happened upstairs earlier?"
Sharkys eyes went round for a split second before returning to his normal face, "What do you mean?" He chuckled.
"Don't play stupid, I know you know what I mean." Pointing a finger at him, his voice raising slightly.
Sharky diverted his gaze, staring at the ground as he scratched the back of his neck. He knew what Aj was talking about, but was it what Sharky was thinking?
Aj shook his head and sighed, "I know you like her Sharks, but …" He trailed off, getting the other Somalis' attention as he watched Aj continue.
"I was worried. She wasn't herself today. It reminded me how she acted after her ex, dazed, fake smiles, and all that shit." Aj narrowed his eyes.
Sharky's brows upturned as he listened, something aching his heart. Would it be right to ask what happened? Or would it be overstepping his boundaries if he did?
He shook his head. If it was overstepping, Aj would tell him, and so he spoke, "I don't want to pry too much, but what happened?"
"Her ex was fine at first you know? No one noticed anything off with him, he was great until he started being toxic, then we could see it from a mile away. Man flippin gaslit her into believing that he loved her the whole time." Aj furrowed his brows in annoyance, as he placed his hands on his hips.
Sharky's face was stern, no emotion on it other than in his eyes, flames of anger burning behind them, his brows knitted together.
If looks could kill, his one would have.
How could someone do that to you? Play someone's feelings like it was a game? He hated people like that. He thought it was so disgusting to even think about it. For sure, if he ever sees the guy, he's gonna have a serious talk with him.
"I don't want you breaking her heart. You're a good guy for sure so just stay that way, blud." Aj pulled a smile, looking up at Sharky as he patted his shoulder, going to the kitchen and leaving Sharky with his own thoughts.
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He slowly went over to sit on his bed, still in disbelief. You had to go through all that? And that bastard treated you like that? Proper mad, that guy.
Something in his heart suddenly twisted, an ache, or a pain, he wasn't sure. But he didn't like the feeling, the feeling of someone hurting you? Sharky would never do that to you.
He knew he didn't like you, because he loved you. He loved you so much that it hurt to think of someone hurting you. He wanted to be there for you, always. To let you lean on him when you needed to, and to be there just to see you laugh, to see you smile.
Pulling out his phone and putting on his Frank Ocean playlist, the song "Thinkin' bout you" popped up.
He sighed quietly as he put on his airpods and laid his head on the headboard of his bed, shutting his eyes close as he listened to the song.
"I've been thinking 'bout you"
A song that was your favourite of Frank Ocean.
"Do you think about me still? Do ya, do ya?"
He smiled, remembering you first singing it.
"Or do you not think so far ahead"
"Cause I been thinking bout forever, ooh"
And that's when it hit him, forever is a long time. And he didn't want to just think forever. He wanted to experience things, experience them with you.
But how could he, if he didn't tell you that he loved you?
He wanted you, no, he needed you.
That's why he got up and ran out of his room, grabbing a jacket on the way out as quickly as possible.
That's why he fumbled rushing to get his car keys to drive to your house.
That's why he's getting into his car, not even bothering to put on a seat belt, but focusing on getting out of the driveway to head to you.
And that's why he's running up to your house, knocking at your door, in the middle of the night.
And when the door opens, revealing you, looking up shocked when you see him, that's when he knew he wasn't too late, that he could still tell you.
Sharky is always a prepared guy. He plans out things for everything, and he's normally very organised. But this was hasty, reckless even, for the first time from what he can remember, he's unprepared.
No planning, no nothing, he was just following what his heart desired in this very moment. And in this moment, he desired you.
Rushing to you? Was definitely spontaneous. But how could he complain? He'd change up his life. He'd endure through any hard circumstances if it meant he'd be by your side.
This was why he wanted to let you know, to let you know now before it was too late, before someone tried to take you away from him.
He turned his gaze to the floor, fumbling for the words to say, suddenly his mind was everywhere, words didn't exist, only feelings at this point.
But he tried, calming his heart down as he shifted his gaze back to you, taking a deep breath in to say something, anything to you.
Sharky rushed to speak, "Y/N, I'm never this impulsive, I think things through, I … I … I'm organised, I plan it all out but…" His brows drew together, sighing in exasperation.
"Agh, I can't stop thinking about you. You're making me act all different, I can't focus anymore." He rubbed his temple, trying to calm his voice, to speak clearer.
"My heart races everytime I think about you, my palms start to sweat and my brain just can't focus. Everytime I close my eyes at night your face shows up and I can't sleep."
His eyes were darting everywhere but you at this point, "Every song I listen to suddenly reminds me of you and I can't get you out of my head."
"And every. damn. glance. I take is because I can't take my eyes off you, you really steal the spotlight when you're in the same room as me. I can't concentrate."
"You honestly looked so perfect when we were filming the video earlier and before upstairs… I'm sorry. I couldn't control myself. The urge to kiss you was killing me, and if Niko didn't walk in, I would have kissed you without thinking properly."
He realised he hadn't looked at you the whole time he talked because he was afraid, afraid of what your reaction would be, afraid maybe you wouldn't have felt the same way as him.
Maybe he read the signs wrong? Maybe you didn't love him back as he did with you?
But the thing was when he did look at you, you were in shock, you stood there wide-eyed, frozen in place at his confession. You couldn't say anything, you wanted to, but nothing was coming out.
He thought he was done for, that you didn't feel the same way until he saw the bright red flush creep upon your cheeks. Your gaze softening at the Somali in front of you.
He took a deep breath, inhaling as much air physically possible because right now he felt like he couldn't breathe either. You were just there in front of him, barely even an arms reach away from him. And the urge to envelop you in his arms was too strong.
"I will treat you right, the way you should be treated. I would never do anything to harm you or hurt you. And it's because I love you. I truly love you. Please…"
This was the minimum he could do for now, Taking your hands in his soft ones, moving your gaze to his soft sienna eyes.
He knows he shouldn't be doing this right here. But he couldn't help it.
It was now or never, to think he would lose you was one mistake he never wants to make, not later, not now.
But if the pain of not having you in his heart was stronger than in his head where his logical thinking was, just for once, just one time in his life he could ignore it.
He would do anything.
Anything for you.
So he spoke, words coming out of his loving heart rather than his mind, his brain allowed his heart to speak just this once, to know, truly know what you feel.
"Let me love you."
Taglist: @b4tasquad @p3drii @n1kodl @elora-k @slutforpablogavi @enhacolor @amwife @distantfromu
Mutuals Taglist: @b4tasquad @p3drii @vctrvn-ls @allygatcr @slutforpablogavi @kennysboxergf @n1kodl @amwife @heartsforaj
Taglist for this fic: @vctrvn-ls @allygatcr @kennysboxergf @lunasmindinwriting @heartsbyvalentina @heartsforaj @elyse3s @leanamaybank
I'm sorry if anyone else wanted to be on the taglist here. Send me an ask, and I'll add you! Currently cannot think rn of who I have to add-
#shuuuuush fics#beta squad#sharky#sharky beta squad#sharky x you#sharky x reader#sharky imagines#sharky oneshots
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Fanboy
Putting this out here before I disappear because of responsibilities. Second part of Fangirl, it is better to read this first before diving into this fic to have some context. The whole idea is from @a-place-filled-with-random I'm sorry this took too long to write. I forgot I had this in my drafts. I also tried to make it very platonic but how can I when it's Yuta Nakamoto?
Also, please imagine Mamamoo as the group and Y/N as Wheein. I'll try to make sense of it, I promise.
pairing:sunbae! idol! Yuta Nakamoto x rookie! idol! female! Y/N word count: 3.5k words genre: fluff summary: How do you have lunch with a fangirl of yours?
How do you have lunch with a fangirl of yours?
Yuta had been asking that question to himself since he woke up that morning. No scratch that, he had been asking that question ever since he invited her to lunch.
Obviously, he can't ask anyone from his group or he’ll just get their teasings. Why would he, a veteran idol, get so nervous with a lunch meal with a hoobae? His legs kept bouncing up and down under the table of a homey Korean restaurant, their usual hang-out place when their group wanted some privacy. This is so different from the confident Yuta on screen, Y/N might just get turned off.
But his smile grew wider as he saw her enter the restaurant - in her hoodie, cap, dark sunglasses, and mask. The girl was crouching down, making herself appear smaller, but it still took some of the customer’s attention. Yuta laughed to himself, she’s very cute. A breath of fresh air.
“I’m sorry,” she quickly said, pushing the cap closer to herself. “I don’t want to attract attention but…”
Yuta smiled, “You can ditch the disguise.”
The girl lightly stared at him in disbelief and he nodded, smiling warmly. “Will you be alright, though?” She asked while removing the cap and glasses, she took off the mask while glancing around and he grinned. “I don’t want you to be involved in a scandal.”
“It’s just lunch, Y/N.” He claimed then gestured to the server for the menu. “They never cared here.” Yuta glanced outside the small window, seeing her manager entering the car. “Is your manager not joining us?”
The girl shook her head, “Oppa had to pick up leader unnie from a variety show.” She thanked the server who gave them the menu before looking at the selection of Korean cuisine. “Wow!” she exclaimed quietly then stopped herself when she realized that the person in front of her heard her.
Yuta had to smile at that, she’s very endearing. “Please order whatever you want.” Her eyes were laser-focused on the menu. The guy was frustrated that there wasn't any information on what her favorite food was, the closest thing that he found about her was that she wanted to eat a home-cooked Korean meal. Luckily for him, he knew a place.
She ordered kimchi jjigae and Yuta ordered galbi jjim. “That was the dish you cooked with Taeyong sunbae during NCT Life.” Yuta was surprised and she looked startled as well. “I’m sorry that sounds so stalkerish.”
The guy shook his head, preventing himself from laughing. “You’ve been a fan for that long?”
“Even during SM Rookies,” she claimed. “I first saw you at an Exo content. Was it Hope with Chanyeol sunbae?” Yuta covered his mouth in astonishment. That long ago? He was so young back then, a predebut video of him. He wasn't even that cool back then. “My classmates were Exo-Ls and I just saw the MV because of them.”
“You’re not an Exo-L?”
She shook her head, “NCT is the first idol group I stan.” Yuta gave her a questioning look as if he could not believe her and she just nodded, smiling at him. “I was struggling to play guitar back then and I saw you in the MV.”
Yuta closed his eyes in embarrassment, “You do know that I only know the basics of guitar and sunbae just taught me the proper position of fingers for C.” The girl laughed at that. “God, this is embarrassing.”
Y/N shook her head, smiling. “I think you’re really cool, sunbae.” And that means a lot.
The meal was great and Y/N obviously enjoyed it a lot. He didn’t know she could be a foodie like Jungwoo. Lunch dates with her would be great.
Yuta shook his head. Did he call it a date? No, this is just a simple lunch. And dates? It would be a miracle to ask her out again. “Are you currently busy?” he asked. There had been rumors of their group making a comeback. Not that Yuta was watching their every action but he stumbled on the article when searching for her name. Again, it’s not watching her every action. He’s just nervous about the lunch date.
He hissed at himself. Date? He must be out of his mind.
The girl nodded, “We’re preparing for a comeback.” Then she sighed. “I think this is our make or break. President wants us to try something new.” Yuta then remembered the past two concepts they had, mostly of a cute image. And with the spur of girl groups doing the same concept, they don’t practically stand out among the competition. “It’s a huge shift, I’m scared I might not do great and the unnies would hate me for ruining this for them.” She stopped, realizing that she said a lot but the older one smiled warmly. “I’m sorry.”
Yuta shook his head, “Is that the only trouble you have?”
The smile on his face kept growing as she shared her frustrations about not doing so much for the group. She’s just the ‘maknae’ while the others have notable jobs such as the main vocalist, main dancer, and main rapper. She’s also scared that she’s the only one who was second-guessing the concept because she feels like she cannot do a huge shift like this.
“More than being great at one thing, I think being good at many things is better. And you are immensely talented, Y/N.” Yuta claimed that made her shake her head. “I think you’re just too shy to step out of your comfort zone.” From the interviews and shows that he had watched, Yuta noticed how introverted she was. She would rather hide on the sides and when the spotlight is on herself, the look of panic is present on her face. It’s endearing for her young age. It’s cute. But the concept is not something she could keep in the long run.
And with her shyness, she might just miss a lot of opportunities. “You are now an idol. You passed one of the toughest challenges which is debuting.” The girl listened intently, “And I’m pretty sure you have something special in you that completes your team.” A concept Yuta had learned late in his idol career. “Now, you have to work hard for your teammates and your fans.”
The younger smiled, nodding while thanking him. “I’m glad I stanned you, sunbae.” Yuta had to laugh loudly at that. “Every rookie idol should have a cool sunbae like you.” His laugh grew louder at that.
Y/N kept on insisting that she should pay for her share but Yuta kept on shaking his head, claiming that it was him who asked her to have a meal with him on her work off. It was a great lunch. Yuta was reminded of the time when he was a rookie idol and all the amazing sunbaes were treating them to a meal. Now, he wanted to return the favor to rookie idols. “Then, I’ll treat you to a meal on my first paycheck.”
“Treat yourself first,” he claimed with a chuckle. “How about the fifth paycheck? I’ll keep my schedule open.” The girl giggled at that. “Thank you for making time to have lunch with me, Y/N. I appreciate it.”
The girl’s eyes widened in surprise then shook her head while bowing down. “No, sunbae. I’m more grateful that you invited me out.” She reasoned out then bowed once again. “This is like the ultimate fan experience. Thank you, Yuta sunbae.”
Yuta smiled. It is.
After waiting for her manager to come back and greet the leader of their group, Yuta heads out to his own car with a wide smile on his face. He exhaled loudly once inside while opening the music player in his car, a ballad version of Kick It with guitar strumming can be heard. He sang along with the lyrics of the song, even stopping when the warm female voice stopped. He probably knows this version more than he knows their own song.
The same with each and every song covers, he could still remember her username by heart. He first discovered it during his Vlives. She would always notice her username and comment about how cool he is or just a simple thank you. Then when he started Instagram, the same username would pop up in his comments with praises. He was curious if this was a genuine fan of his so he checked the profile and stumbled upon song covers of their songs. A female with a warm voice. A Czennie, no doubt. But what fascinated Yuta was the fact that she was also a Yutami. She even advertises his work better than the company.
He had found a certain comfort in her covers that he started downloading it, even waiting for new releases every week. He wanted to hint to the agency about the gem he found and maybe they could scout her. Then it suddenly stopped, the weekly song covers were gone as well as the comments and her account.
For some time, he even thought that maybe she was just his fever dream. But the saved audio files were his proof that this person was indeed real. He assumed there was no way he could see her again then Jaehyun showed him a video of a rookie idol who sent Yuta a confession which left him surprised. The girl from Instagram. Y/N.
But the idol world is a huge industry so even though he was glad that she debuted as an idol, Yuta was worried that there wouldn’t be any chance to meet her, or even see her.
A chance came when the elder members of NCT started doing a content in a nail salon. Yuta was fidgeting hearing Johnny and Taeyong talking to her so he just casually passed by. They were introduced and the first thing he thought was how she kept avoiding his gaze. Unfortunately, they had to move locations so they had to leave.
It must be the faeries, Yuta thought, that he forgot his airpods in the nail salon so he had to come back and look for them. But as he opened the door, he saw Y/N crying on an older man’s shoulder. Gently, he closed the door while sighing hard. Is it because of him? Was he so cold that he scared her off? Great Yuta, she wouldn’t be your fangirl now!
When ISAC came, another chance to see her, Yuta had to force the whole group to stay and watch the archery competitions. He even told Jaehyun about her looking so lost and looking for a chair to sit on. He didn’t expect the guy would just stand up and let her sit next to him. Now, he’s twice as nervous. All the teasing from his teammates doesn’t help as well that he only felt bad when she just left without looking bad. Maybe he scared her off once again.
At a speed he never thought he’d ever experience, he dashed to the small booth by the back and ordered a sandwich. She did say she’s on a diet so this might be good. While waiting for the ahjumma to finish his order, he started scribbling on a piece of paper. A number that became his way to have this small lunch with an artist he admired the most.
—--
All her worries about the concept of their new song were easily well-understood when the music video came out. (Think of this as the music video) It’s a huge shift, a cool mature concept. And what was that song with a lot of innuendos? But the sound is amazing for showcasing Y/N’s voice. She doesn’t need to strain her vocals just to sound cutesy. Instead, her voice sounds more fitting in these classy sounds. Yuta had to gasp when the middle of the song came up and the music video showed Y/N kissing the male model in the music video. So this was the concept they were going for? It really is a huge shift.
He could easily message her and congratulate her for the comeback. But Yuta doesn’t know what to say. Should he ask her out and ask her what she thinks of their comeback? Maybe she liked it. It truly is their make or break. But in their case, the new song propelled their careers into a household name. Maybe it was the performance of the song that made it viral, they were singing live at festivals. And real well at that. Their performances were also very musical-like and they got wide recognition as a very talented group. Y/N could have gotten her first paycheck already.
The first time Yuta had a chance to see her again was at a special episode of one music broadcast. Since they’re still promoting their song and NCT was invited as the main act, he’ll surely see her in one way or another. Maybe they can have a small chat and he could praise her for their amazing song. But Jungwoo was already greeting them before he could utter a word when their groups passed each other in the hallways. “Your song was really catchy.” The younger NCT member complimented as the girls giggled and thanked him. “I’m surprised when Y/N kissed the actor in the MV.”
The girl shyly smiled. “She cried that time,” the leader of her group teased. Y/N had to whine, shaking her head. “She must have been too nervous.”
“That was a huge shift,” Johnny claimed. “I’m surprised Y/N agreed to do it.”
The rapper of the group lightly glanced at the youngest member of their group before the main vocalist held her hair, smiling widely. “The president promised that if she agreed to this concept, they’ll release her written song for our next comeback.” So, she was coerced into this? Isn’t that illegal?
“Oh,” Jaehyun exclaimed. “And what is that song about?”
Yuta didn’t miss her small glance his way before smiling shyly, “I’m still working on it.”
The girl group was called before Yuta could have a chance to congratulate her.
Maybe next time.
But that next time took too long. Both their groups had been so busy with schedules that there wasn’t a chance to cross paths with her once again. Yet Yuta was glad that Y/N’s group was invited to one of the year-end award shows NCT is also invited. It was a sure sign, being in these award shows, that your group had done well in the charts which their group had been achieving currently. And Yuta was again proud that their group will be showcasing their next comeback single in this award show — the song Y/N wrote.
Artists were on one side of the stadium, seated around round tables designated for each group. Before the girl group could have a performance, a staff came asking Taeyong if Y/N could sit with their group for their performance to which he nodded. The girl was apologetic as she came to the table with the staff, reasoning that among the groups in attendance, she was more at ease with NCT. Yuta smiled, that is great. At least his group comforts her rather than makes her awkward.
“Congratulations on the new song!” Johnny claimed. “We’re excited to hear it.”
She covered her mouth as she laughed, “Please don’t expect too much.” Then she shivered a bit.
“Are you alright? Do you feel cold?” Haechan, who was sitting beside her, asked.
The girl shook her head. “I was feeling under the weather.” Then she smiled. “We must go to Japan tomorrow so I must be better.”
“You should go to the hospital first,” Yuta claimed, staring at her intently. She does look a little pale. And the very little clothing she has doesn’t even help with the cold. She should have worn thicker clothes with more fabric to cover her skin if she’s feeling sick. “Or at least drink some medicine.”
“I’m fine, sunbae.” She claimed then smiled. “I’ll ask manager oppa to take me to the hospital later.”
Before Yuta could mutter another word, the lights dimmed and the music for the song played. (Think of this as the performance) It was more upbeat, more funky. Both the leader and main vocal of their group started singing while interacting with the audience. They made their way to the artist’s section to pick up the rapper of the group seated at one of the girl group’s tables. The main vocal of the group was the one who held her hand out for Y/N as they were both shown on th screen with wide smiles on their faces. The group continued their singing while interacting with the artists.
It was a really fun song, Yuta had to note. While the girls walk to the extended stage, facing the artist, that is when he fully grasps the meaning of the song. It’s about a guy. Is it a lovesong? Y/N started shouting to hype the crowd making everyone at their table giddily laugh. “She’s so cute!” Haechan commented while Doyoung leaned in to whisper, “He’s just like you, hyung.”
When the chorus came and they talked about a guy with a pretty smile, Yuta was confused about why Y/N pointed at him. But his co-members obviously saw that and teased him about it. “Is the song about you, hyung?” Jungwoo asked. “And Y/N was the one who wrote it, right?” Taeyong continued.
Yuta shrugged before smiling secretly. It's not possible.
Instead of pondering over it, he was just in awe at how she handled all her adlibs while feeling sick. He’s more proud to see her professionally conquering the stage and even doing her best despite her condition. Her voice was so clear and notes in perfect pitch that made her so admirable. A true idol. Yuta can’t help but just be in awe at how talented she is.
But she should really see the doctor after this. With their busy schedule, she’ll probably just get more sick. The moment all the artists came to the stage for the last song, he noticed that she was missing from the group. Casually, he made his way to the leader of her group, inquiring about it. “Manager oppa asked her to take a rest.” She answered politely with a slight smile on her face. Yuta just nodded, thanking her then returned to his group. That was better, letting her rest. But surely, that’s not enough right?
—---
“You’re crazy, you know that right?” Yuta’s manager asked as he wore the sunglasses. With a smirk on his face, he just nodded and held the four paper bags in his left hand and the album in his right hand. The venue isn’t as crowded as when their group is, but he’s somewhat glad their group is getting traction here in Tokyo. Since he had to chase their schedule, he was the last person in line for the fanmeet. The teenage girls in front of him were talking to themselves and he just greeted them politely. Maybe he had the wrong disguise. But it’s the classic black cap and facemask, and black sunglasses. Is it too much?
The leader of the group was the first member Yuta interacted with. He handed her one of the paper bags before whispering to not alert anyone. The girl was just smiling knowingly and the second girl, the rapper of the group, was the one who claimed, “Y/N will have a blast seeing you here.” The main vocalist was also interacting with him and Yuta noticed how the youngest of the group was just focused on the person in front of her. Did she notice him already?
When he sat in front of her, she gasped which made him giggle. “Sunbae, what are you doing here?” She asked then glanced at her groupmates who were just watching the two of them with smiles on their faces. “I didn’t know you’re also here in Japan,” she claimed after greeting him politely, covering her mouth in astonishment as she spoke. Yuta handed her the paper bag full of medicine and supplements that he got from an oriental hospital on the way then placed the album on the table for her to sign.
“Are you feeling any better?” The girl nodded as she signed the album. “I’m glad.” The girl smiled before handing him the album.
“This feels weird." He raised an eyebrow at that. "You, sitting in front of me.”
Yuta laughed wholeheartedly. “Why? I’m a fan.” Y/N smiled shyly. “There’s a great seafood restaurant nearby. I can get you a reservation easily. Should I ask your manager?”
The girl lightly glanced at the staff behind her and then at her groupmates. “Then sunbae, do you want to have lunch together?” Yuta was taken aback by the question. “I did promise to treat you for a meal.”
He slowly nodded, considering the pros and cons of having lunch together in a foreign country. “Yeah, sure.” The sides of her lips curled up. “I’ll just wait for you to finish your schedule.” She nodded, thanking him once again before waving goodbye.
Yuta went down the stage and walked into the backstage where the staff was attending to him. He removed his cap and mask before breathing hard. There’s only one question in his mind at this moment.
How do you have lunch with an idol that you admire and are a huge fan of? Author's Note: I really like Mamamoo's songs and whenever I hear 'You're the best', I am reminded of Yuta because of that "Guy with a pretty smile" and "Guy whose thoughts were dashing" line. Then Moonbyul's line "I'm your eternal girl fan" feels very fitting to the story. So this is very self-indulgent. But let me know your thoughts on this.
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