#this kid psycho YEET | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

whatifyoulivelikethat · 4 years ago

Text

dreaming in reality, m | myg, jjk

pairing(s): yoongi x reader x jungkook

summary: The wrong guy shows up in your car – Jeon Jungkook. Again. He’s less drunk this time, but no less weird. Then the right guy shows up. Min Yoongi. You know, the guy you fucked in Jungkook’s bed that one time. Guess he can convince you to do anything. Like, say, take Jungkook’s virginity. Don’t worry, he’ll help.

warnings: rated M (18+) for language, tiny bit of crack; alcohol consumption; violence? someone gets slapped lol; technically Jungkook’s first time; smut (fem reader, threesome, slightly degrading dirty talk, nipple play, fingering, f-receiving oral, penetrative sex, partial handjob); non-idol!AU - friends with benefits / lovers? with Yoongi; Yoongi is a very bad boy and he knows it; JK is blond and wearing his ‘ON’ and ‘Dynamite’ GDA 2021 outfits (except w/o the white blazer)

a–dick–ted au yes that’s what I’ve decided to call this this was supposed to be just more Yoongi smut but then Jungkook decided he’d like this to be about him, what can you do?

"Can you pick me up tonight?"

"Mhm. What are you wearing?"

A deep chuckle. "Eager to undress me?"

"I'm doing you a favor. There's no guarantee you'll get more than that."

"Hmmm." That low raspy voice did not believe you. "White dress shirt, black jeans. Can't miss me."

He hung up.

White shirt, black jeans. You remembered to lock your car doors this time, so you turned around to press the button so he could get in. The door opened and the young man slid inside, reeking of alcohol. Wait. Some kind of belt harness around a thin waist. Ashy blond hair. Hand tattoos. Thick thighs. Chiseled jaw.

Fuck!

Again?

"I need to talk to you, noona."

"Get out."

Jeon Jungkook was not as drunk as before. He was definitely drunk, but not piss drunk like last time. His eyes were unfocused and he was nervously biting his pink lower lip. The mole underneath bounced up and down as he chewed it mercilessly. He swallowed and undid the first few buttons of his shirt, revealing his tan, muscular pecs. Oh, thank the Lord, Jungkook remembered to wear a shirt underneath, although it was a very low-cut white t-shirt. He kept running his hand through his currently blond hair tensely, revealing the shadow root. Well, it was well done at least. He had a good hairstylist. You hadn't realized Jungkook changed it, so he must have done it recently.

Probably to get attention and remind every human being that he was hot.

Blergh.

You still weren't convinced he wasn't a dirty little fuckboy.

"Why are you sitting in my car showing off your nervous ticks?" you said irritably.

"I gotta ask you something."

His black boots were a little dirty from the party. Outside, the drunks were as loud as ever, with the same seven girls on the porch craning their heads to gawk at Jungkook in your car. Different house, same scene, and drunk Jeon Jungkook sitting in your passenger's seat, once again being the wrong guy sauntering into your car.

Where the fuck was the correct guy?

"Look, psycho, fucking spit it out or yeet. I'm not repeating what happened last time."

Jungkook's dark brown eyes flickered to you, turning his body to face yours. Running his tattooed right hand through his bleached hair over and over, spreading the golden strands, the ashy tone catching the low light of the lampposts. Jaw flexed, tiny pink tongue darting out and licking his lips. He was a little sweaty, cheeks hollowed in a little with how hard he was breathing.

You raised an eyebrow.

"You have ten seconds before I kick you out and believe me when I say I have leg strength."

"Are you and Yoongi-hyung dating?" Jungkook asked suddenly.

What?

"What?"

You made a face at him.

He sucked in a breath, brows furrowing at your response. “Because I could have sworn…”

Your mind flickered back to that faithful night. Shit. You shouldn’t have let Min Yoongi convince you to sleep right there in Jungkook’s apartment. You remembered his wicked smirk, his deep, raspy voice in your ear, Jungkook’s not going to know and don’t you want to do bad things with me? Don’t you want to be bad with me? He could make you do anything at this point. You two fell asleep on Jungkook’s bed. Next to hungover Jungkook.

Naked.

You mentally slapped yourself.

“What made you come to that conclusion?” you snapped, narrowing your eyes.

Jungkook tilted his head, sucking in his cheek. It made a sharp sound and his tongue flashed against his white teeth for a split second. You almost flinched. He pursed his lips and kept his gaze on you. You were wearing a tight white high-necked crop top, oversized black hoodie, and high-waisted black shorts. Dark pink and violent violet chunky sneakers. Almost no makeup. Hair tied back into low pigtails with one pink and one purple scrunchie to match your sneakers.

Oh shit. The hoodie wasn’t yours.

Hopefully Jungkook wasn’t perceptive enough to figure that out.

“Noona.”

He said it strangely, breathlessly. Almost sexually. You recoiled a little. Jungkook was leaning forward, giving you a clear view down his shirt, blond hair falling into his face, covering one eye. His alcoholic breath floating towards you, far too close for your liking.

“I…” Jungkook swallowed, Adam’s apple bobbing. “I want… to…”

The door to your passenger’s seat was roughly yanked open.

Jungkook jumped, throwing his back into the seat, brown eyes wide and staring at the newcomer. White dress shirt, two sizes too big, with ties at the wrists to cinch in the bishop-style sleeves. Black jeans, distressed with several mismatched patches. Silver chains on his black leather belt and around his pale neck. Black hair, pointed dark eyes like a cat.

A single, cocked eyebrow.

“Let me guess,” drawled Min Yoongi, the correct guy you were supposed to be picking up, looking from you to Jeon Jungkook, who was impossibly flat against the car seat. Yoongi sounded amused. “He just waltzed in.”

You narrowed your eyes. “No, I locked my doors this time.”

Yoongi’s gaze flickered to Jungkook, who still seemed mildly terrified, and then back to you. The glint in his dark brown eyes was far from innocent. His fair cheeks were a little pink.

“Ah, so you wanted Jungkook in your car?” There was an edge to his voice, almost dangerous, but to you it was Yoongi’s usual teasing. Jungkook looked like he was preparing for his own death. Both of you ignored him for the moment.

“You said white dress shirt and black jeans,” you scowled. You gestured Jungkook up and down. “Hello?”

Jungkook’s thighs tensed and bulged against his tight jeans. Eyes still as wide as saucers. He hadn’t blinked in a good thirty seconds.

“We have the same excellent taste and style. How fortunate for you,” Yoongi purred. Then he finally patted Jungkook’s thigh, making him start and let out a panicked squeak. “You want noona to drop you off, Jungkookie? She’d be happy to.”

“No, I wouldn’t,” you gritted out.

“Yes, she would,” Yoongi said cheerfully. He slammed the front car door and opened the backseat. You rolled your eyes and stared straight ahead. Even from here you could smell the whiskey. Yoongi hummed and you snuck a glance at him through the rearview mirror.

He looked positively beside himself with glee.

Hmph. Fine.

His loss.

“You bleached your hair, Jungkook?” Yoongi said absentmindedly as you started up the car.

Jungkook ran a hand through it once again. “Uh, yeah. What do you think, hyung?”

“Hm, looks good. Too much upkeep for me, personally. Seatbelt.”

Jungkook hastily went to grab his seatbelt and put it on. Too bad. You were ready to brake hard and send him flying out the windshield. Just kidding. Maybe. Well, you would have to be going real fucking fast for that to happen. Maybe over ninety or some shit. You pulled out of the neighborhood of houses, already knowing what direction to go in to the correct apartment complex. Yoongi and Jungkook lived in the same building.

So convenient.

You thinned your lips into a line, ignoring their conversation, until Yoongi snapped his fingers and called your name to get your attention. You glared at him through the rearview mirror. Yoongi’s legs were wide open, flopped in your backseat. He grinned at you and placed his hands on the inside of his jean-covered thighs.

Fucking tease.

“What?”

“Didn’t you say you wanted to dye your hair at some point?”

You shrugged. “Yeah.”

Jungkook sat up, looking at you. You didn’t look at him. “Oh? You’re going blond too?”

You snorted. “I said I wanted to dye my hair, which means a color.”

“What color?” Yoongi asked lazily.

Your eyes flickered to him in the rearview mirror again. He flexed his long fingers and pressed them against his jeans. You tucked your tongue in your cheek. Yoongi was aware Jungkook couldn’t see him and he was also aware you were watching him. Your eyes went back to the road.

Yoongi was also aware that because of Jungkook’s presence, neither of you were getting any tonight, so he resorted to teasing you like the bad boy he was.

“I dunno. Pick one for me,” you said impassively.

Yoongi chuckled, a deep, husky sound, revealing his pink gums and straight white teeth.

“Red.”

“N-noona?”

You curled your lip, looking around you. Ugh. You hated parties like this. So loud, so annoying, so many idiots. You didn’t understand why Yoongi came to these things. It was probably because of his lively friends. Being social like this was probably a great thing, but this was not your scene.

“No time to chat, Jungkook. Have you seen Yoongi?”

Jungkook was flapping his gums at you. He was still blond. He must be keeping up with his hair care because it still looked soft and ashy. It was swept to one side this night. Powder blue dress shirt, tight against his muscular pecs and white slacks that seemed to be choking his thighs. Brave man, wearing white around this much alcohol and lunacy.

You had to admit, Jeon Jungkook had guts looking like a prince to a peasant’s party.

“Where is he?” you muttered. “Kim Seokjin called and told me to get him because he was asleep.”

“U-uh…” Jungkook looked around as you stepped into the party house, your heavy black boots thudding against the hardwood floor. Short black skirt with silver chains and a black hoodie that said ‘WHATCHU MEAN?’ in neon lime green across your chest. Phone and keys in your hoodie pocket. Other than that, you weren’t wearing anything as of note. Oh.

Except.

Your usual ‘fuck off’ mentality.

“I haven’t s-seen him in the past hour,” Jungkook stammered.

“Fat lot of help you are.” You clicked your tongue and moved past him.

“You dyed your hair,” Jungkook blurted suddenly.

You turned your head and looked back at him. “Yeah, so?”

Your hair was now a gradient from a long black shadow root, to dark purple berry, to bright neon red. It was half-tied up with a black scrunchie, a few strands hanging around your face. Jungkook kept staring at it. You raised an eyebrow and turned away from him. Eh, you had no time for this. You needed to grab Yoongi and get the fuck out of here.

“I-I’ll look you help.”

You raised your eyebrows as Jungkook squeezed past you, his hard back pressing against your arm.

“You can’t even speak, you drunkard,” you said, rolling your eyes.

“I mean, I’ll help y-you look, noona,” Jungkook corrected himself, licking his lips nervously, running his right hand through his hair.

He’s hopeless.

Well, better than going alone.

Wordlessly, you followed him throughout the party, opening doors and craning your head over the bodies. So many topless people. Ugh, it was pretty late. By the time you two reached the back of the house, you never wanted to see another nipple ever again. You saw Kim Seokjin at the karaoke machine, blasting eardrums with what you assumed were supposed to be high notes, but, in reality, was simply screaming.

You didn’t even want to walk up to him to ask.

“He might be upstairs,” Jungkook said, swallowing hard.

“Lead the way,” you sighed, annoyed this was taking longer than it needed to.

You made your way up the stairs, pressing yourself against the railing to avoid touching people. Kept your hands in your kangaroo pocket and a scowl on your face. Jungkook suddenly stopped and you collided into him. Fuck. Why did he feel like he was made out of rocks? Stupid muscles.

“Hold on.”

Some guy was sprawled all over the middle of the hallway, unconscious.

“I’ll just step over him.”

Jungkook growled. “No. What if he wakes up and looks up your skirt?” He bent over and picked him up, propping him against the wall. You raised an eyebrow. Like anyone cared what was up your skirt besides Min Yoongi. Whatever. If he wanted to play the part of noble prince, you weren’t going stop him. You waited as Jungkook pushed the guy’s chin down to his chest and motioned you to the hall, towards the many doors. Probably mostly bedrooms. You winced. Probably going to see more nipples. And dicks. And pussy.

Sigh.

And, yep, you were right.

Jungkook tried to shield your eyes, but to be honest, he looked way more scarred than you. You merely shook your head and moved on, door to door. Opened one and saw a girl in a tight black dress crawling on a bed, over a guy in a black biker jacket and acid wash jeans. The hole in the knee was so big you could see half of his pale leg. Hmph. Why bother even wearing pants?

You were about to close the door when you paused. Wait. You’ve seen that black mop of hair before. The girl was kissing down his neck, yanking down the white t-shirt and ripping it. You recognized the grunt of sleepy annoyance.

“Get off him.”

The girl shot up; red lipstick smeared from making out with his neck. You stepped inside and jerked your head towards the door. Voice cold and unrelenting.

“Out.”

She furrowed her brows at you. “Who the fuck are you?”

You narrowed your eyes. “Doesn’t matter. Dude’s asleep. You shouldn’t take advantage of someone who’s asleep.”

“He’s my boyfriend,” she shot back defiantly.

You snorted inelegantly. “No, he’s not. Don’t be stupid.”

The girl shoved herself off the bed, advancing on you, nasty snarl on her lips. “How would you know? Who do you think you are?”

“Not an idiot,” you barked sharply, completely forgetting Jungkook was behind you, gawking at this entire exchange. You looked her up and down and took a step towards her, the aggravation of the past hour reaching breaking point. All that time spent getting here, not being able to find Yoongi, and then discovering some bitch crawling all over him was pissing you off. Like everyone else, alcohol clung to her like the plague. She was furious, ready to catfight you, although you were pretty sure you were going to win this one because you were sober and your boots were a lot more stable than her tall heels.

“Look here, bitch, leave me and my boyfriend alo–”

You slapped her.

Hard.

Not holding back, not making a sound, just straight up slapped her across the face. The sound was so loud it could be heard over the bass of the music. She nearly crumpled at the force, gasping and choking at air as she stumbled, eyes wide in disbelief, slim hand cradling her face.

“He’s not your boyfriend,” you growled. Your voice was absolute zero with how cold it was. “He will never be your boyfriend. Now get the fuck out of my face before I rearrange yours into the next century.”

She squeaked at you.

Your eyes narrowed and you raised your hand again. She bolted, stumbling on her heels, seeing Jungkook staring, opening her mouth to say something, but you made an inhuman, grating noise deep in your throat. Her shaking eyes connected with yours and you cocked your head in the direction of the door, popping your neck loudly.

She scrambled out of there like her life depended on it.

It did, because you had enough at this point.

“Dumb bitch,” you spat, before releasing the tension from your shoulders. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Jungkook’s mouth wide open, deer-in-headlights look on his face. “What?”

“W… Why do you look so hot when you’re angry?”

You scoffed. “What are you talking about?”

“Fuck, you are damn hot when you’re angry.”

Deep, raspy voice that made your spine tingle. You turned your head to see Min Yoongi on his elbows, licking his pink lips. He was definitely drunker this time, cheeks flushed. His fair skin on his neck and cheeks were covered in red lipstick marks. You clicked your tongue at him.

“When did you wake up?”

Yoongi smirked.

You frowned.

“Maybe when you slapped her.” His dark eyes glittered in the low light of the bedroom, lips curving higher and revealing his teeth. “Maybe when you got her attention.” Full-on, open-mouthed smirk now, devilish and wicked. “Maybe when you opened the door.”

A muscle in your forehead twitched. You strode over, looking down. Yoongi slowly lifted his head, pink tongue sliding out and tracing his teeth, cocking an eyebrow. You clenched your jaw.

“I like your hair,” Yoongi purred softly. “You took my advice.”

“I didn’t care what color it was,” you responded evenly. “I left the hairstylist do what she wanted.”

Yoongi arched an eyebrow. “She made your hair match your body. Hot and sexy.”

You matched his raised brow. “You saying my hair wasn’t attractive before?”

Crafty dark brown eyes on yours, intoxicating you like whiskey.

“It always needed me to mess it up before it was truly as sexy as you.”

“Are you guys sure you’re not dating?”

Oh right.

Jungkook was still here.

You turned your head to face him. You hadn’t even noticed that he had walked all the way up to the bed, standing next to you. The door was closed. Who closed it? It was also locked. Your brows furrowed and your eyes flickered back to Jungkook. He was watching you, blond hair covering one chocolate orb, pink lips wet and slightly parted. Tan skin radiant in the low light.

“What are you still doing here?”

His visible eye shifted down your body, pausing at your legs and then shifting to Yoongi. Yoongi gave him a neutral expression. The eyes shifted back to you.

“I was going to help you carry him if hyung was still asleep.” His voice had dropped several octaves.

“Well, he’s obviously awake,” you said dismissively.

Jungkook’s eyes narrowed, more blond hair sliding down, shadowing his face.

“You want me to leave so you can fuck him? Or so he can fuck you?” Jungkook accused.

You raised your eyebrows.

“I told you he liked you.”

You exhaled, shifting your gaze to Yoongi. He was wiping the lipstick off his neck with the collar of his ruined shirt. He looked displeased, nose scrunching as he did so.

“Wanting me to desire him is not the same as liking someone.” You swung your head back to Jungkook, ticking your chin at him. “Isn’t that so, Jungkook?”

There was a moment of silence.

If silence could be bass-boosted music, screaming downstairs, and a bottle smashing somewhere nearby. But in this random bedroom, it was as if time stopped, you staring at Jungkook, Yoongi looking up to witness what was about to unfold, and your slow realization that Jungkook was not answering fast enough.

The younger man shook his blond bushel of hair very, very slowly.

“No, noona.”

His other eye was revealed, both of them trained on you.

“I want you to take my virginity.”

Silence.

He must be joking.

“And there it is, out in the open,” Yoongi mused.

Jungkook continued, hands in his pockets, chest sticking out from under the tight blue dress shirt.

“Hyung knows this. I told him.”

You let out a soft breath. “You know, Jungkook, you could get any bitch in this house.”

“Don’t want a bitch,” Jungkook retorted, dangerous edge to his voice, slipping into his Busan satoori. “Want you, noona.”

He was way too serious to not mean it. You tucked your hands into your hoodie pocket and flicked your head to remove red strands from your face.

"Kinda out of left field, kid," you muttered.

You heard Yoongi sit up on the bed and looked at him out of the corner of your eye. He shook his shoulders out and hooked his legs over the edge of the bed, sandwiching one of your thighs between his own. His shirt hung down, ruined and covered with red lipstick from where he tried to wipe it off his neck and cheeks. His neck was pink with irritation.

"Not really," Yoongi chuckled. "He's been eyeing you for a while now. You never noticed because you're too busy being crabby."

He wasn't touching you with his hands and insulting your character instead.

"Speak for yourself, grump."

Yoongi squeezed your thigh with his and you involuntarily shuddered at the slight skin on skin contact due to the giant hole in his pants. Shit. Yoongi snickered.

"Are you guys dating?" Jungkook snapped irritably.

"No."

Both Yoongi and you said it at the same time, glaring at each other. Jungkook might as well have been a lamp. You stared deep into those mischievous brown orbs, black hair messy and covering his brows, teasing smile on his lips. Dating wasn’t the word for it. You weren’t sure there was a word for what Yoongi and you were doing. You could tell he didn’t know either.

It wasn’t dating, that’s for sure.

"Did you guys fuck on my bed or not?"

Before you could respond, Yoongi broke your gaze and looked straight at Jungkook. Jungkook's jaw was clenched tight, dark eyes flashing. Yoongi's voice was slipping into his Daegu satoori as well, deepening and slightly slurred from whiskey.

"We did."

You clicked your tongue.

Great. Just great.

"Ate her out and fucked her hard, all over your sheets. Right next to you. She even touched you."

"An accident," you hissed.

Yoongi ignored you. "Her hand slid up your abs and chest." He chuckled. "It was sexy. You have a nice body, Jungkookie."

"Stop telling him this shit." You raised your hand to smack Yoongi in the arm but he whipped his head back to you, grabbing your wrist out of the air. You stiffened at the touch. He turned your palm to face Jungkook and directed his attention back to him.

"This hand, in fact."

Were you surprised? No. That was the game. Push the limits, up the ante. You just didn’t think Yoongi would tell Jungkook something like that. Maybe he wouldn’t if he was fully sober. But Yoongi wouldn’t regret it either. He would roll with the wave, as usual.

You were a little irked that you weren’t the one who took the plunge first.

You finally snuck a glance at Jungkook. His jaw was no longer tense and his cheeks were flushed pink. He raised his head to look at you, blond locks swinging, and you looked away. Fucking Yoongi. Always trying to cause trouble. But that's why you kept fucking him. Because he was always finding ways to make your life interesting.

Maybe you were addicted to the adrenaline he gave you.

Maybe you were just addicted to Yoongi.

You sensed movement. You tried to pull your wrist out of Yoongi's grasp but he held it tightly. You finally looked back to glare at him, only to be greeted by the sight of Jungkook's blue shirt mostly unbuttoned, his sculpted abs and chest fully on display. Your eyes widened, taking a step back, realizing how close he was. Yoongi yanked you back, grin on his lips.

A beat passed.

Your gaze locked with his.

Don't you dare, Min Yoongi.

He planted your hand on Jungkook's torso.

You tried to twist away, but Yoongi held you there, pressing your palm into Jungkook's hard muscles. The younger man sucked in a breath, surveying you through his lashes. A strange shiver traveled from your hand to your spine, pooling down to your core, setting it aflame. Yoongi slid your hand up to Jungkook's pecs. You could feel how hot and heavy Jungkook's breathing was on the back of your hand. His heartbeat raced under your fingers.

You gulped.

"Yoongi." Your eyes were on Jungkook and his blown-out pupils, blond bangs all over his forehead. Your pulse roared in your ears. "You said he was sappy. That it had to be the love of his life."

Yoongi chuckled.

"Noona," Jungkook replied for him in his husky voice. "I’ve been planning for it to be you."

Your eyes flickered back to Yoongi. His other arm slid around your legs, pulling you to him. He made you breathless, looking down into those devilish eyes, pink lips parting a little. You could feel his hand on your thigh, stroking your skin, making you tremble with his touch.

"He asked you to take it," Yoongi purred softly.

You inhaled deeply. Whiskey. Leather. Yoongi. Your hand was still on Jungkook's chest. You dug your nails into his skin a little. Jungkook moaned, breathy and deep.

"I'm not taking anything," you whispered.

Yoongi's hand released your wrist and slid up the back of your hand, each of his long fingers sliding between yours, pressing your joined touch into Jungkook’s chest. Fingers spread over his skin, his breathing vibrating though your palm. All Jungkook had to do was take a step back.

Why wasn't he taking a step back?

Yoongi squeezed your fingers with his. You could feel the heat building inside you. Desire. His voice became smokey. Lustful. Purring your name softly.

He could make you do anything when his voice became like that.

"I'm telling you to take it."

Your mouth went dry.

"Why?"

Yoongi leaned forward, resting his chin right between your covered breasts. So close. Your heartbeat fluttered. Fuck, you wanted to kiss him so very much. You wanted to kiss that naughty mouth, the mouth suggesting sinful and treacherous ideas. Whenever you were with Yoongi, danger always seemed like a good thing.

"Because you feel good when you do bad things."

God, Min Yoongi was a bad boy.

"And I love watching you do bad things."

Dark orbs glittering with trouble.

"I’m here with you."

I’m here with you.

His arm around your legs tightened. Your panties were absolutely soaked. Yoongi had you right where he wanted you. He knew it too, even as you pursed your lips. Yoongi finally looked away from you.

"You don't mind that, right, Jungkookie?"

Jungkook shook his head quickly. "No, hyung. Whatever..." He paused, knowing what he was about to say was wrong. His eyes flickered to you. You didn’t look at him. You just stared at the black pile of hair that was Min Yoongi.

Wondering what was going on in that head of his.

"Whatever it takes."

Yoongi removed his hand from Jungkook’s chest. You pulled yours back quickly, still not looking at Jungkook. Yoongi placed his large hands on your hips. Raised his head. Fuck. Trapping you in his devious eyes. He mouthed words at you. So sexy. So fuckable. You mouthed words back. You’re bad. Yoongi grinned, licking his teeth.

“Stand in front of us, Jungkook.”

And Yoongi spun you around to face him, pushing you into his arms. Jungkook’s hands gripped your upper arms, holding you in place. And, for once, Jungkook wasn’t drunk. He wasn’t stumbling into your car by mistake, he wasn’t reeking of alcohol and nervous ticks. If anything.

Jungkook smelled good.

You were staring into his tan chest. Slowly, you looked up. Up his pecs, up his prominent collarbones, up his shapely neck. You could smell the cologne, fresh like clean laundry mixed with the sharpness of the sea. Your eyes continued up, up his sharp jaw, up to the tiny mole under his lower lip, up to his high cheekbones, up into those chocolate orbs. His blond hair hovered over his eyes, shrouding them with gold. Jungkook sucked in a breath as you made eye contact. You cocked an eyebrow.

“I still don’t see why it has to be me.”

Jungkook licked his lips, leaning in.

“Has to be you, noona,” he whispered, breath hot against your lips.

For some reason your heart was beating fast now. Was it Yoongi’s hands sliding down to your thighs, squeezing them? Or was it Jeon Jungkook, pupils dilated and grip tight on your arms, nearly shirtless in front of you?

“I dream about you,” Jungkook breathed. “All the time. The only woman I’ve ever dreamed about touching me, teasing me, feeling all of me.” He frowned a little, tilting his head. “I had sex dreams before, but none of them felt real. None of them were like the ones I had with you. The ones with you were always extremely detailed. It was like all the things you did were really happening. I could finish with them.”

You didn’t have to guess what that meant.

“I could feel everything.”

Jungkook pressed his forehead against yours, ash blond strands mixing with dark red.

“Your nails digging into my skin, you moaning above me.”

His eyes burned with determination. Yoongi’s hands slid up your legs, fingertips sliding under your soaking panties. You were so distracted by Jungkook’s words that you barely felt it. But your body remembered. Your body remembered that orgasm right above Jungkook, Yoongi’s tongue inside you, your hand on his abs, nails curling into them as you came. Jungkook’s voice was so low that it felt as if your heartbeat was resonating with it.

“Make my dreams real.”

Yoongi circled your clit with his index finger, not touching it, making you gasp.

“Taint me, noona,” Jungkook murmured.

You pressed your lips against his and Yoongi pressed his finger against your clit. You whimpered into Jungkook’s mouth, hand slipping inside his shirt to hold his waist, kissing him deeper. Jungkook’s hand came up to cup your face, holding you close as you moaned, feeling Yoongi stroke your sensitive bundle of nerves slowly, working you up. His other hand was holding your ass, squeezing it hard. In comparison, Jungkook’s lips were soft, tongue hesitantly sliding into your lips. You latched around it, sucking on it roughly. Jungkook squeaked, trying to pull away, but you held on, tugging as you bobbed your head back and forth, eyes cracking open as you moaned deep in your throat.

Jungkook was staring at you, fascinated.

You released his tongue and snaked yours into his mouth. Pushing it in, sliding it back out, steadily and deliberately. Jungkook’s eyelashes fluttered, pressing his body into yours, needy cries in his chest, trying to get more. Pleasure spread throughout your hips, spurred upward by Yoongi’s touch. You felt heady and tense, increasing the force you were using to fuck Jungkook’s mouth, breathing in shallow gasps, closing your eyes again, so close, so close. So wrong, making out with Jungkook as Yoongi stimulated your clit to orgasm.

So wrong, but so, so fucking good.

You sucked your tongue back and moaned directly into Jungkook’s mouth as you came, legs shaking, clit throbbing against Yoongi’s fingers as your panties soaked even more, the scent of sex suddenly prominent in this random bedroom. Jungkook gasped, body shuddering and shaking at your exhale, roughly shoving you into his hard chest. Your crotch hit his and you could feel his erection through his tight pants.

The party kept thriving, bass booming the walls, blind to the events about to unfold.

Jungkook drew back, panting. You felt Yoongi withdraw his hand, heard him lick it off. But you were staring at Jungkook, at his swollen lips, at his blue shirt half-pulled off from your touch, revealing his right shoulder covered in black tattoos, blond hair covering half his face.

Beautiful and dangerous, like an angelic incubus.

You felt Yoongi’s hands on your hips again, unzipping your skirt. Slipping it down. Your body reacted, kicking it away. Jungkook’s eyes were fixated on your black panties, pushed to one side from Yoongi’s touch, soaked with your juices.

“Take off your shirt, Jungkook,” Yoongi said as he reached down to unzip your boots.

Jungkook yanked his shirt out of his pants and tossed it aside, watching Yoongi slowly strip you. Taking your boots and setting them next to the bed, gripping your hoodie and yanking it over your head. You made a disgruntled noise, but he dumped it next to him, showing you the phone and keys were still in the center pocket. You frowned at him, but Yoongi shrugged, unhooking your black bra. You held onto it, covering yourself. Yoongi raised an eyebrow.

“Let him see the tits.”

You clicked your tongue. Then you turned back to face Jungkook, challenging him.

“Jungkook can come and see for himself.”

Jungkook swallowed, taking a step towards you. Chewing on his lip, eyes fixated on your hands holding up your bra. You felt Yoongi’s fingers hook around the sides of your panties. Jungkook stopped right in front of you. Reached forward and gripped one of the bra cups. You held tight, not letting go. Jungkook’s jaw tensed and he yanked at it, pulling it out of your grasp.

You lowered your hands.

“Fuck…” Jungkook breathed. “They’re prettier than I thought.” His hand raised, but then he stopped, looking at you hesitantly. “Can I… touch them?”

You arched a brow. “Never touched tits before?”

“I want to ask you,” Jungkook replied softly. “I want to know you want it too.”

Chocolate eyes framed in gold, enchanting you.

You reached up and took his wrist, guiding his hand to your chest. You were breathing hard, making them bounce a little. Pressed his palm into your hard nipple, shivering at the different hand, the different feeling. You felt Yoongi slide your panties down, down. You slid Jungkook’s hand down, wrapping his fingers around your nipple. He gasped, rolling the nub between his fingers, watching your face as you moaned, Yoongi’s fingers crawling between your legs once again.

You pointed to your other nipple.

“Mouth, here.” Stared into Jungkook’s ravenous eyes. “Please.”

Jungkook bent down and licked your nipple, coating it with saliva. Your hand slid up the back of his head, tangling in the soft blond locks, pulling him closer.

“More, Jungkook…”

He whimpered your name, pinching your nipple as you said his. You gasped softly as his lips closed around your nipple, sucking lightly, tongue pressed against the tip and moving it around, rubbing the other at the same time. You sank your teeth into your lower lip as you felt Yoongi slide two fingers into you, so easy because he had made you cum beforehand, fucking you as Jungkook made out with your tits. You stared down Jungkook’s muscular back, admiring the way his muscles rippled as he moved. Your hips bucked in Yoongi’s hand, leaning forward so he could finger you deeper, shoving your nipple into Jungkook’s mouth. He sucked hard, nipping lightly, and you threw your head back, pleasure flowing all over. Jungkook switched sides and hands, rubbing your wet nipple with his thumb as he teased the other, flicking the hardened nub with his tongue. Rougher, matching Yoongi’s pace in your pussy, shoving his fingers so far into your pussy that you felt his knuckles.

Yoongi against your back, purring your name.

“Cum for me,” he murmured, low and raspy. “Cum all over my hand as Jungkook abuses your nipples.”

Fuck, his satoori, his words.

Yoongi had you wrapped around his fingers in all senses.

“Mm, fuck, fuck…”

You moaned loudly as you came, legs shuddering, rutting your breasts into Jungkook’s face as your hand pressed him into your tits, grinding your hips into Yoongi’s hand as your pussy clenched around his fingers, drenching them with your orgasm once again. Jungkook moaned into your chest, burying his nose into your tits, tongue pressed against your skin.

“Ah, fuck, you taste so good, noona…”

Yoongi chuckled, slowly pulling his fingers out of you.

“You haven’t tasted anything, Jungkook.”

And then Yoongi fell back against the bed, taking you with him. You had to release Jungkook’s head, whining at the loss of his warmth. Yoongi dipped his knees down and shoved them between your thighs, spreading them wide. He slid you down his body, forcing you to expose your wet pussy to Jungkook’s wide, voracious eyes.

“Have a taste.”

Jungkook’s eyes flickered to you. At this point, it was doomed. You wanted Jungkook’s tongue and your needed it now. Your voice was grating, tainted with lust.

“Get on your knees and taste me, Jungkook,” you growled.

Jungkook obeyed immediately, kneeling before you and crawling up to your thighs, extending his pink tongue, nearly drooling. Chocolate eyes watching your face.

Yoongi shoved his wet fingers into your lips.

You grunted in protest, but then Jungkook’s tongue touched your wet slit, lapping greedily as he watched Yoongi’s fingers slide in and out of your mouth. You moaned around them, licking off your taste as Jungkook moaned into your pussy, coating his tongue with your sweet, thick juices.

“O-oh, fuck, hyung, noona…” he panted hotly into your core. “Tastes so fucking good.”

“Told you,” Yoongi chuckled triumphantly, slowly fucking your mouth.

“Wanna be in here so bad, hyung…”

You make a gargled noise around his fingers and he pulled them out, humming in his chest so your head vibrated with the sound.

“I’m not taking him raw,” you gasped out as Jungkook’s tongue swiped over your clit. Your breathing hitched as he lapped at it experimentally and he continued after witnessing your reaction. Your hand slid down and gripped Yoongi’s wrist, moan torn out of you as Jungkook’s licking intensified. Almost too much, forcing you to tighten your core, juices leaking out of your slit and onto his chin.

“Don’t worry. I came prepared.”

Your jaw tightened as you neared orgasm. Of course, Yoongi came prepared.

“You planned this.”

“Did I?”

Far too amused and teasing to be innocent. Your back arched as Jungkook increased the suction, your head tipped back against Yoongi’s chest, barely being able to see him upside down, mouth open as you panted. Yoongi smirked at you.

“Or did I simply assist little Jungkookie in convincing noona to take his virginity?”

His words and your orgasm hit you like a truck, hands flying up to grip Yoongi’s shoulders as you nearly screamed Jungkook’s name, thighs threatening to clamp his head if it wasn’t for Yoongi’s strong legs spreading them out. Your body fell limp onto Yoongi’s chest, flooding Jungkook’s mouth with your orgasm. Jungkook groaned, drinking it up, hands coming up to hold your hips down as he sucked it out of you.

“Not all of it, Jungkook,” Yoongi warned. “Keep her wet for you.”

Jungkook whined, drawing back, lips shiny and glossy with your cum. His pink tongue snaked out, swiped over his lips, scooping it all into his mouth, the action obscene and arousing all at once.

“Fuck, noona’s pussy tastes so good…”

Yoongi lifted your limp body and dragged you up the bed, placing his head on the pillows and positioning you on top of him. You scoffed, back and ass pressed against Yoongi’s still fully clothed body.

“You want him to fuck me on top of you?”

“Of course,” Yoongi answered smugly. “I can help him get into position and he can get back at me for fucking you on top of him.”

“You didn–”

Yoongi pinched your nipples, cutting you off as he flicked the sensitive nubs, turning you into a moaning mess in seconds. Your legs tried to close, but once again Yoongi hooked his around yours and spread them out for Jungkook, who was stripping off his pants. Your eyes widened seeing Jungkook’s cock straining against his boxer briefs. Yoongi had a great dick. The best dick. But Jungkook had never been in a woman before and he was impossibly hard because of it, gasping as he pushed his underwear down, leaking pre-cum everywhere. Either that or he really was very, very turned on by you.

For the first time throughout this entire night, it really hit you that Jungkook actually liked you. That he was not a fuckboy and he genuinely wanted you to take his virginity, so much so that, somehow, he convinced Yoongi, your partner-in-crime, your other half in this long-winded sexual escapade of pushing each other closer and closer to the edge, until one of you fell.

Yoongi clasped his hands around your upper arms, sucking in an excited breath.

Your breathing caught in your throat.

Or maybe.

Maybe both of you had already fallen.

And both of you were twisted enough to be ridiculously turned on by Jungkook crawling onto the bed, eyes glazed with desire, desperate to fuck you. Yoongi tapped your arm and pressed a condom into your palm.

“Put it on him.”

You motioned Jungkook forward and he scooted up, sucking in his lower lip. The tiny mole underneath quivered as you ripped open the condom, reaching awkwardly to roll it down his thick cock. You inhaled sharply, feeling his warmth against your fingers. Your eyes flickered up to him and he swallowed, chest rattling nervously.

“H… How do I…?”

“Hands on the bed,” Yoongi said behind you. Jungkook placed his hands on the bed, on either side of Yoongi’s arms, next to your head. He stared into your eyes. You placed your hands on his hips and scooted him down so he was positioned above you.

“Give me one of my legs, Yoongi,” you said softly, still keeping eye contact. Yoongi let go of your right leg and you raised it, Jungkook moving his hand so you could place your calf on his shoulder.

“Do I just…?”

“Down.”

He missed.

“Try again,” Yoongi whispered gently. “Hyung will help you.”

Jungkook chewed on his lip and lowered his hips again, gasping as Yoongi’s fingers wrapped around his cock and led him to your pussy. You lifted your hips so Yoongi could see better. The head pressed against your entrance.

“A-ah…” you breathed. “There.”

“Push,” Yoongi instructed.

Jungkook slowly slid in. He winced. “She’s too tight.”

“Relax,” Yoongi chided you. “He’s not me. He can’t handle all that yet.”

“I am,” you shot back. “He’s not pushing hard enough.”

Yoongi huffed. “Fine. Shove it all in there, Jungkook.”

Jungkook’s eyes widened. “Won’t that hurt you?”

Instead of waiting for Yoongi to answer, your hands came up and grabbed Jungkook’s hips, forcing his cock deep into you. He yelped at the sudden rush of pleasure, eyes rolling back into his head. You held him down, not letting him move, trying very hard not to tighten around his dick because, holy fuck, Jeon Jungkook had a nice cock, filling you up and stretching you out with his hardness, unforgiving and wonderful, reminding you of Yoongi’s.

Except, well, Yoongi usually didn’t look like he was going to pass out.

You had to bite your tongue so you wouldn’t laugh. Yoongi pinched your arm, already knowing your reaction. You hissed, pulsing around Jungkook’s cock. The younger man moaned, lowering his head, blond hair falling like a curtain. His eyes found yours. Jungkook’s gaze so intense it made your shiver, nails digging into his hips.

Outside the locked bedroom door, someone was yelling at someone else about cheating or something frivolous like that.

“You can move whenever you’re ready, Jungkook,” Yoongi finally said.

“Excuse me, I’m right here,” you interjected.

“Shh, don’t complain.” Yoongi’s hand stroked your red hair, flaring it out on his chest. “Let Jungkookie use you.”

Your chest tightened.

You felt yourself get wetter around Jungkook’s cock.

“What did you say to me?” you breathed. One of your hands lowered from Jungkook’s hip and gripped Yoongi’s wrist tightly. The tone of your voice changed, not quite so harsh anymore, turning needy and thin, breathless. Jungkook was watching you curiously. You felt your ears heat.

Yoongi’s free hand slid around your waist. You couldn’t see his face, but you saw Jungkook’s eyes slide upwards, observing his hyung. A mischievous spark suddenly appeared in those dark brown eyes. Yoongi cupped your breast, stroking your nipple lightly. Shallow, tight breaths, waiting for Yoongi’s response.

“I said,” Yoongi drawled. “Let Jungkookie use you.”

Oh no.

Oh shit.

Why were you suddenly so horny? It suddenly got so hot, suddenly so aware you were sandwiched between Jeon Jungkook’s hard dick and Min Yoongi’s fully clothed body, and Jungkook was going to fuck you into this random bed and into Yoongi himself. So very wrong. So very bad.

And you wanted it.

Jungkook raised his hips and pushed back into you, clenching his jaw. You were so wet that it was easy, not enough for your sudden hunger.

“Not too far,” Yoongi instructed. “You’re going to fall out if you pull out too far.” Yoongi nudged your hip. “Up.” You raised your hips and pressed your thigh against your chest. “Jungkook, angle yourself higher.”

Jungkook shifted and got more on his knees. “Like this?”

“Mhm. Go harder.”

Jungkook slapped his hips into you and you gasped, pressing your head into Yoongi’s chest. He stopped, looking worried.

“She’s fine.”

“Are you su–?”

“Jungkook,” you snarled. “Listen to him and just fuck my damn hole so I can get off.”

Jungkook’s eyes widened at your dirty words. Yoongi chuckled.

“She’ll be fine, Jungkook. Focus on yourself for now. Don’t go faster or you’ll cum too fast,” Yoongi cautioned. “At least for the first time. Go harder so you can feel it all.”

Jungkook bit his lip and began to slowly, but roughly, fuck you. Smacking your hips together with force, gasping at every descent, your pussy squeezing the full length when it was inside you. His gasps turned into moans, your breathy name, eyes closing as he thrust into you.

“Oh, fuck,” Jungkook groaned. “Fuck, she’s so wet, so tight…”

“Like your dreams?” Yoongi teased.

Jungkook seemed not to notice. “Better. Fuck, so much better, hyung, oh my God…”

“Harder,” Yoongi commanded. “I know you can go harder, Jungkookie.”

You moaned deeply as Jungkook rammed his hips into you, the wet squelch loud and lewd, so obvious if someone was listening outside, even through the music. But none of you cared, none of you noticed the bed squeaking as Yoongi spurred Jungkook on gently, having him increase the pace, making your body shudder with pleasure, mouth opening and tongue hanging out as you gasped for breath.

“You wanna cum, Jungkook?” Yoongi asked breathlessly, becoming hard under you as you cried out in pleasure, the base of Jungkook’s cock splattered with your juices.

“Not yet,” Jungkook whined.

“Alright, stop for a second.”

Yoongi placed a hand on Jungkook’s waist and pushed him all the way into you. You whimpered, so close to orgasm but cut off by Jungkook stopping, clenching around his cock as the head hit you deep inside.

Yoongi dropped his voice, speaking to you.

“Give him a hug.”

You gripped Jungkook’s cock and pulsated around it. Jungkook groaned, throwing his head back as his cock throbbed against your walls, roughly massaged by your pussy.

“Oh, fuck me…”

Jungkook began to move again, harder and faster now, lost in his lust, chasing his pleasure.

“Doesn’t it feel nice?” Yoongi purred to you. Your heartbeat skipped as Jungkook pounded you into Yoongi, biting your lip hard and whimpering as he fucked you mercilessly, lack of practice making it an erratic rhythm, watching his thick cock pump in and out of you, so good, so rough, using you.

Your name drifted from Yoongi’s lips, smokey and devious, driving you insane. Your head tipped back, staring at the ceiling, gasping as Yoongi’s words worked into you.

“You love it, don’t you?” Yoongi drawled. “You love Jungkook using you, fucking you like his own personal gloryhole, hm?”

Oh, fuck.

You whined pathetically, liquid gushing down Jungkook’s cock as you came, core tightening, Jungkook fucking you harder, grunting as he clenched his jaw, feeling you massage his length harshly. Yoongi pinched your nipples, lengthening your orgasm, and you squeezed your eyes shut, pleasure overwhelming your senses, consuming you, feeling nothing but Jungkook’s cock, Yoongi’s hands, and Yoongi’s words corrupting you.

“Fuck, you’re so sexy letting Jungkook use you like this,” Yoongi growled. “So generous, letting Jungkook fuck your tight little hole with his big cock, hm?” He rolled your nipples in his fingers and rubbed them hard.

“A-ah, Yoongi!”

“No, no,” Yoongi scolded, pinching them firmly and making your squeal. “Tell Jungkook how good he’s doing. Tell him how good he feels inside you, naughty girl.”

You opened your eyes to see Jungkook’s sweaty face, brows furrowed, jaw tight as he smacked your hips together over and over, veins popping in his neck and forehead. His cock was jerking inside you, close. So close.

“F-fuck, Jungkook,” you gritted out, feeling Yoongi release your nipples and bounce your tits in time with Jungkook’s thrusts. “Fuck, you’ve doing so good, can’t believe this is your first time, you’re so fucking strong and so fucking big, fuck…”

Jungkook’s dark eyes fixated on you, your bouncing tits, your open mouth, your glazed eyes, hips fucking him back as he fucked you.

“It’s because you have the perfect pussy, noona,” he growled, leaning down, pressing you into Yoongi, getting a deeper angle, nearly hitting your cervix. His breath was hot and erotic against your face, eyes flickering up to Yoongi before boring into yours, capturing you, dragging into his pace and his cock slamming into your hips.

“The perfectly tight little gloryhole for me to use.”

You cried out, something inside you snapping, cumming again all over Jungkook’s cock, your juices sliding down your thighs and his thighs, smearing into Yoongi’s jeans, dripping everywhere, so much, oh, God, so fucking intense that your pussy clamped around Jungkook’s cock. He moaned your name right into your face, thrusting one last time, pumping the condom full, stretching it out against your walls, so much you could feel it and his cock throbbing against your walls, trying to get it all out.

Yoongi didn’t even bother to ask. He simply reached down and pushed Jungkook back a little, feeling for the bottom of the condom and pushing him out of you. Jungkook whined, but Yoongi pulled you away from him.

“It’s too much,” Yoongi mumbled. “How long have you been holding out? Fuck…”

He pulled the condom off him and it was still dribbling out. Yoongi grabbed your hand and wrapped it around Jungkook’s cock, holding you in place with his. You were too tired to focus, too exhausted to realize what was going on.

Yoongi began to pump Jungkook with your hand, slowly. He was still so hard, veins imprinting into your palm, cum dripping all over your and Yoongi’s fingers. Jungkook whined, wincing at the sensitivity, but Yoongi was careful, sliding your palm up to the head and squeezing it firmly but not too tightly. Slowly, slowly, bringing Jungkook back down.

“Party’s dying,” Yoongi breathed. “We gotta get out of here.”

You were naked. Jungkook was naked. Your lower back was killing you. Yoongi’s blood alcohol level was far too high to drive even if he sounded sober. You sucked in a breath and shoved your face into the unknown sheets, groaning.

“Give me a minute, fuck.”

Shit, you just wanted to sleep.

third act. was it a dream a–dick–ted au

masterpost

#yoongi x reader #jungkook x reader #yoonkook smut #yoonkook x reader #bts smut #yoongi x you #jungkook x you #min yoongi x reader #min yoongi x you #min yoongi smut #jeon jungkook x reader #jeon jungkook x you #jeon jungkook smut

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seungstarss · 3 years ago

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friendship over FRIENDSHIP FUCKING OVER IM TAKING THE FRIENDSHIP BRACELETS BACK!!!!!

nah cause what in the actual fuck 😭😭😭😭😭 im deadass unfollowing u the instant i send this ask bc sei bestie ure a fucking psycho YOURE SICK you’re absolutely sadistic i can’t believe u just did that to me 😭😭😭😭 no cause i was v happy just reading ur other cute smaus and then ur crusty ass decides to recommend bet….. NO IM LITERALLY NEVER LISTENING TO U EVER AGAIN 😭 WHY WAS BET LIKE THAT. WHY WAS BET BUILT LIKE THAT. LITERALLY EVERY SINGLE CHAPTER HAD ME S C R E A M I N G AND NOT EVEN IN A GOOD WAY???? U WERE MAKING ME WANNA PULL OUT MY HAIR,,,, EVERYBODY WAS FUCKING INFURIATING AND BY THE END OF IT I LEGIR GAVE UP ON TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHERE THINGS WERE HEADED BC ALL MY THEORIES WERE SO SO SO WRONG 😭 not me giving the best girl agenda to reiko 🤡 not me thinking heeseung would come out top 🤡 not me demonising luna/seoyeon when they rlly weren’t even all that bad 🤡 BYE. BYE. IM SHATTERED. ICB ALL THE CHARACTERS JUST YEETED AWAY YN LIKE THAT…… HEARTLESS MOFOS 😭 EVEN NICE BOY JAKEY TURNED OUT TO BE A FUCKING LOSER I 😭😭🤌

anyway youre fucking sick for this and i hate u so much 😭 but ok in all seriousness I ACTUALLY FUCKING LOVED THAT SO MUCH SEIIIIIIIU PLEASE R U KIDDING ME???????? I LOVE LOVE LOVE HOW ENGROSSING THE ENTIRE FIC WAS??? I WAS GENUINELY SURPRISED THAT U MADE THE FRAT BOYS INTO BAD GUYS BC NORMALLY WE ALWAYS SUGARCOAT THOSE THINGS AND HENCE WHY I KEPT THIMKING MAYBE MAYBE MAYBE SUNGHOON COULD REDEEM HIMSEFL…… BUT IM SO. SO SO SO GLAD U KEPT THE ENTIRE FIC SO SK SO UNPREDICTABLE?!?! I LOVE ALL THE FUCKING DRAMA???? THERE WERE SO MANY CHARACTERS AND SO MAMY LAYERS TO ALL THE RELATIONSHIPS THEY HAD W ONE ANOTHER I CANT BELIEVE U WERE EVEN ABLE TO KEEP TRACK OF THIS???????? OH MY GOSHHHHHHH IM IN LOVE W THIS FICCCCCCCC PLSSSSS 😭😭😭❤️❤️

SEI BESTIE U DID SOSOSOSOSO WELL!!!!!!!! i’m such a simp for ur work iDEK what to read on ur masterlist next 😭 but pls u rlly know how to make a good smau like ALL THE ELEMENTS WERE THERE???? it was so funny but intriguing and entirely unpredictanle and wild OMG I LOVED ITTTTTTTTTT I RLLY LOVE wicked characters so although the frat boys turned out to be assholes i kinda LOVED IT like it was so fun hating characters >:)))) I WAS GENUINELY ANGRY AT TIMES????? ALSO EVEN YN KINDA PISSED ME OFF TOO LIKE U RLLY SPARED NOBODY !!!! but ugh it was sosososososos good i can’t believe this has been missing from my life 😭

and omg U DID SO WELL ON UR WRITTEN PARTS TOO????? they added sm depth and detail and it was so nice w the way u weaved in all the dialogue too???? IM OBSESSED. WHY ARE U SO GOOD AT EVERYRHING PFFFTTT PLS IM SIMPING FOR SEI!!!! naur cos i rlly rlly enjoyed that omg thank u sm for the rec ;-; NOW I TOTALLY GET WHAT U MEANt WHEN U SAID THAT PEOPLE WERE SCREAMING AT THE CHARACTERS 😭 NAH CAUSE AFTER HEESEUNG DID WHAT HE DID,,, THE CONVO HE HAD W HOON WILL NEVER BE FORGOTTEN 😭 my lord i need to sit down i need to blankly stare at the wall for a hot minute while i try to compose myself

anyway bet goated sei goated taegyu goated

PLEASE MAI READING YOUR REBLOGS WERE SO FUNNY I CANNOT LIKE,,,, WHEN YOU WERE GUSHING OVER HEESEUNG I WAS LIKE GURLLLL 💀💀💀😈 BUT GETAUQTAAGAUA SOMETHING ABOUT MAKING YOUR CHARACTER SUFFER IS SO SATISFYING??? IM SO SORRY ETSHSTAUAG BUT YES REIKO WAS REALLY A SNAKE AND HEESEUNG. WE DONT TALK ABT HIM, HE'S UNSPEAKABLE. I WAS ACTUALLY ORIGINALLY GONNA DO A SPIN OFF FOR bet! HEESEUNG's BACKSTORY BUT I DECIDED NOT TO BC I GOT LAZY........ BUT LEMME JUST SAY HIS PAST IS TWISTED. (WHICH KINDA EXPLAINS WHY HE'S SO TWISTED AND ALL BUT AHAHAH I SHOULDNT TRY TO JUSTIFY HIM.)

BUT QFAHAFAH YES, I REALLY DIDN'T WANNA GO WITH THE TROPE WHERE THEY ALL FALL IN LOVE WITH HER BC??? IDK I'M NOT THE BIGGEST FAN OF REVERSE HAREM SAURRR... BUT I WANTED TO TAKE THAT IDEA AND TWIST IT 🤩

FSHAFAHA YOU ENJOYED THE WRITTEN PARTS HELP??? BET'S WRITTEN PARTS ARE OKAY, BETTER THAN REVELATIONS BC I FEEL LIKE I IMPROVED A BIT ON MY WRITING FROM REV TO BET (HOPEFULLY) BUT THIS COMING FROM YOU⁉️ THAT'S THE BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER

PLS I RECed BET BC I WAS ReALLY CURIOUS TO SEE HOW YOU WOULD REACT TO IT QTAHQTAHQ BUT THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL THE FEEDBACK? ILYSM 😭😭😭💖

#mai ☆#maiverie asks ♡#mutuals ଘ(੭˃ᴗ˂)੭

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ambidextrousarcher · 4 years ago

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Sarcastic StarBharat Reviews-Episode 22: In which horny deer rishis set off a chain of events.

Hello everyone! I’m back after a VERY long hiatus, had some real life issues to deal with, along with the aggravation of changing an url and some online drama too. And I’m right in time for Diwali, too, yay! Happy Diwali, people! Also Happy Children’s day!

Tagging my usual taglist: @ambitiousandcunning @medhasree @shaonharryandpannisim @hermioneaubreymiachase @hindumyththoughts @chaanv @ratnas-musings @whydoyoucareaboutmyusername @justahappyreindeer @milesbianmorales @allegoriesinmediasres @pratigyakrishnaki @iamnotthat @adishaktis @ratnas-musings. Enjoy your day, everyone!

Review is under the cut.

PS: Nila updates- The Sarcastic StarBharat review of episode 18 is missing from my blog for some reason, I’ll reupload it. Also, for anyone who’s listening to my song covers, the next items are Karam Ki Talwar from Arjun the Warrior Prince, Moh Moh Ke Dhage from Dum Laga Ke Haisha and Jo Beji Thi Dua, from Shangai.

Okay. Rehash is in order, along with some new nicknames. Till the last episode, Madri has reached Hastinapur, the precap of the last episode makes it clear that this is the episode with horny deer rishis.

I had made a numbering mistake in counting the number of canon fails, my bad, so, as of now, we’re at canon fail #49.

Here’s the nickname rehash and additions to be made-

1. Bhishm-Mr. Paragon of Perfection

2. Dhritrashtra- Mr. Drama Queen (Honorary mention-DisasterRashtra, courtesy of @iamnotthat)

3. Pandu-Honey Boy/Lord of Cheesy Lines

4. Gandhari-Ms. Always Patnidharma

5. Shakuni-Mr. Ominous Music/Mr. Annoying Poseur

6. Karn-Mr. Glitterwash

7. Kunti-Ms. Melodrama/Lady of Cheesy Lines

8. Amba (deceased)-Psycho Princess

9. Satyavati-Psycho Mum

10. Vichitraveerya (deceased)-Drunk Kid

Here are the new additions:

11. Vidur (finally)- Picking the line where he likens himself to a thorn during Pandu’s coronation, he’s Mr. Weepy Thorn.

12. Madri-Ms. Smarmy Tears

13. Krishn-(Parody version, anyway, also, FINALLY) Mr. Excess Gyaandaan.

Now, let’s get to business.

Alright, so, last episode, Gandhari was told that Drama Queen wants her in his chambers. Being the aadarsh, Ms. Always Patnidharma that she is, she goes immediately, and that’s where today’s episode of choice begins.

She stumbles in and stutters out her usual ‘Husband?’ (International viewers, please note, Hotstar has rolled out the English subtitles for your most unfavorite show. It translates ‘Arya’ as Lord, but I’m keeping the ‘husband’ variation, because no.)

Anyway. He shushes her. ‘Don’t say anything, Gandhari, just listen. The mind is so weird, isn’t it?’ Okay…why this sudden volte face? Ah, he’s trying to apologise, I guess? He says that he was absorbed in his negative emotions of hurt, grief and jealousy, but when no news of Honey Boy came from the battlefield, he realized that he still worries and cares for his little brother, and that he was merely unfortunate, not conspired against, concluding that he was unjust to Honey Boy. O…kay? Should I count this as a canon fail? Canon Dhritrashtra can be two-faced, so eh, leave it.

Ms. Patnidharma is shaking her head next to him, because of course, she’s that much of a doormat. ‘I was unfair to you too. I had rejected you, Gandhari, but if I realise my mistake, will you accept me?’ Ah. I see what this is. Anvil-shadowing. Just before Pandu ‘loses’ his ability to ‘be a husband’ Drama Queen and Patnidharma make up with each other. Newsflash, writers: Nothing is this clean cut.

Of course, that was precisely the opening Ms. Patnidharma was waiting for, so she feels her husband up as they hug. Drama Queen’s heart, apparently, very anomalously, is overflowing with happiness, now that he has unloaded his weakness onto Patnidharma, or so he says. Don’t believe him, though, don’t be the naïve idiot Patnidharma is, because that weakness of his wreaks bloody wrecking ball havoc in the future.

‘So what if I don’t become the King?’ Excuse me. I just choked on my water. What’s up with this volte-face? Just what? ‘I have more respect here than the King himself!’ I think I’m gonna count this as canon fail #50 because nah, he ain’t gonna say this in any adaptation that’s sane. And of course, since he’s randy too, it seems, he goes ‘When you give me a son, he’ll be the eldest son and King after Pandu. I’ll also get the pleasure of being a King. Will you give me the gift of such a talented son?’ Ah. So that’s what the volte-face is for. Canon fail #50 cancelled. Drama Queen would say anything at all to get his way, that’s right. Patnidharma, predictably, goes all gushy. ‘Yes, husband, for your sake, I’ll go to the portals of Yamlok themselves!’ Ah, sheesh, sometimes, watching this show makes me think that I should projectile-yeet myself to Yamlok.

He laughs. ‘When the time comes,’ he says, ‘we’ll go to the portals of death together, Gandhari.’ Well, that, at least, is true. He continues that they still have many happy moments to experience. She nods, melting into his embrace.

Scene changes to a green vista, the whickering of horses heard. Madri, henceforth known as Ms. Smarmy Tears, is laughing, Ms. Melodrama being stony faced and stoic. (That’s a change, though the music manages to make even THAT dramatic) The camera focuses on a deer, and Smarmy asks Honey Boy to stop, because it’s a beautiful deer. Okay…I know what’s coming up next. Anvil-shadowing, anyone? I realise it was very long ago when we were introduced to Ms. Melodrama, but I’ll give you a short rehash. She was introduced saving a deer from hunters. Anyone got the hint? It’s an obvious ‘Madri is an evil witch!’ gambit. Please do not take it. I know that in canon, Kunti and Madri probably had a fractious relationship given the whole fracas over the boon, but I refuse to believe Madri would be this transparently biatch-y.

And…bingo! Smarmy says that the deer is absolutely unique, and follows it up with a request for its skin. Melodrama, of course, is having none of it. She passionately launches into defence of the deer’s children who’d be orphaned, basically echoing her very first piece of dialogue on this show. Do you think there’s a chance that they dubbed it in? I mean…I wouldn’t be able to say that twice with a straight face. But, whatever gives, I guess. Fawn get orphaned often, goes Smarmy. It’s not like I’m asking you for the position of the Queen, can’t you do this much for me? Since StarB has a thing of making women either bitches or doormat ditches, its Honey Boy who cuts in. ‘Speak of good things alone.’ Did this guy get a theology class between the ‘war’ and this moment? ‘I’ll get the deer for you, the rest of you please stay here.’ And then the show takes yet another opportunity to set Melodrama as good and Smarmy as bad, as Melodrama tries to give Smarmy a moral lesson about abstaining from killing for no reason, and Smarmy going all casteist (not sure if that’s the right word, since afaik Kunti’s maternal family are also Kshatriyas? Yadava is not one family. It’s an entire dynasty.) And here’s canon fail #50 and #51. #50 is the fact that Pandu, in canon, hunts the deer because he wants to. Madri has nothing to do with it in the text. #51 because the jibe about Yadavs being shepherds that Madri makes smacks of a misconception about politics in the MBH. The idea of ‘Yadavas’ being shepherds is present because of the lore of Krishn and Balaram in Gokul. While I’m sure there might be some branches of the family that may dabble in those pursuits, typically, considering the social structure of that time, Kunti’s family is of quite royal pedigree.

The scene switches to Honey Boy looking for deer, listening attentively to the rustling leaves. Really, this question goes for canon too, haven’t these guys learnt a thing at all from the whole Dashrath/Sravan Kumar fracas? That it is TOTALLY not a good idea to just randomly shoot in a random forest, anyone? At least sight the prey a little, no?

Regardless, he shoots an arrow, the tell-tale thunk is heard, followed by a human scream (the typically serial-ish ‘nahi, nahi!’ aka ‘no, no!’). Alarmed, he sets off in pursuit of the sound. The camera focuses on a bloody arrow then showing us a rishi and a rishin. ‘Maharishi Kidam?’ exclaims Pandu. ‘It was you?’ ‘What have you done? You shot an arrow without recognizing me! I was dallying (read: deer hanky-panky-ing) with my wife in the form of a deer, and you shot an arrow without considering that the grace and the form of the deer could only mean it is such?’ Okay, for all that I want to call this canon fail #52, I’ll be honest…because such a scene, at least one of Pandu killing Kidama when he’s in sexual congress with his wife in the form of a deer does happen. Sometimes, *sigh* canon itself is quite strange.

But…in the whole of this thing, I have an observation to make, a few questions to ask, in the context of this serial:

1. Madri saw only one deer? What was the deer rishi doing, a deer mating ritual of some sort? Where was the wife then?

2. Does what he said mean that there might be…other rishis doing deer hanky panky?

3. Kidama was a rishi, right? He’d have figured out Pandu wants the ‘deer’ when he saw them and vanished? He could have, IDK, sprinted off real quick, or turned back into human, or just vanished once more. Why escalate it this much?

Honey Boy is very contrite and begs for forgiveness. Canon fail #53. In canon, he basically goes, well, Kings hunt deer, why cry about it? (That is, the dialogue given to Madri to establish her as ‘bad’) The deer rishi brings up the Dashrath point I gave above and says that Honey Boy’s crime can’t be pardoned, that he shouldn’t have killed a man in congress with his wife, so he curses him that he’ll die the moment he’ll have congress with any woman. Canon fail #54. The original curse specifies ‘his loved one’ not any random woman.

Cue dramatic panoramic shot and dramatic title bgm. Honey Boy is in tears. The rishi dies.

Scene changes and we’re back in Hastina, where the court fool is entering. He says he has a lot of questions. Mr. Weepy Thorn prompts him to ask his questions. So there’s this long drawn out riddle session that’s set up to predict that Gandhari is pregnant, and Drama Queen will be experiencing the love of a son soon. There’s happiness all round, lots of hugs too. Of course, this show takes no rest from anvil shadowing either, so exactly at this moment enters Honey Boy with his wives. Honey Boy is welcomed with joy and immediately apprised of the news. In his head, the dying deer rishi’s words echo, even as his wives smile by his side. (Ah, apparently, there’s anvil juxtaposition, too! Whee!)

Anyway. Satyavati notices he ain’t looking happy and she asks him if he got what she said. He manages to sponge her off, hug his brother and congratulate him. When he does that, Annoying Poseur closes his eye.

As he ascends the throne, deer rishi’s words come back to him, asking what kind of a King he is. Honey Boy refrains from climbing the final stair, turning. He says that he has something of great importance to announce, confessing that he has killed Kidama and is no longer worthy of being a King.

His announcement is met with shock all around, as he renounces the throne of Hastina. Cue dramatic title bgm again. Camera focuses on Satyavati (who’s quite less psycho nowadays), then panning one by one to Drama Queen, Paragon of Perfection, Smarmy, Melodrama, Patnidharma, Ambika, Ambalika, a grinning Poseur (both eyes open), back to Honey boy and Mr. Paragon as he drops his angvastr limply.

Scene changes as Mr. Perfection walks inside Honey Boy’s chambers and they have an argument about his responsibilities. Honey Boy puts forward that for all that Satyavati wants a worthy King, he is no longer worthy, that even Indra renounced heaven for the killing of a sage and meditated for eons, that mere charity and abstinence as suggested by Mr. Thorn and Kripacharya won’t be enough. He continues that the duty of a King, the man who holds the royal scepter is to dispense justice to his people. He asks who would mete justice out on a King? The camera pans out to Mr. Perfection, standing mute, ending the episode.

Alright, this whole thing is canon fail #55. Pandu does not go back to Hastina, he sets out immediately to atone. Also #56, his wives know everything as he does. He doesn’t keep it hidden from them.

Precap: ‘But the crime was ours’ says Smarmy. ‘the punishment, however, has to be borne by our yet unborn children!’ ‘You can’t ever have children.’ Announces Honey Boy, going on to inform them of the curse.

#sarcastic starbharat reviews #scribbler scribbles #nila writes #nila rants #nila gets salty #pandu #aka honey boy #kunti #aka ms melodrama #dhritrashtra #aka drama queen #gandhari #aka ms always patnidharma #madri #aka ms. smarmy tears #bhishm #aka paragon of perfection #diwali update

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princeleyjeans · 4 years ago

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A meh (Bday tomorrow)

Tomorrow’s my birthday and while I dread the fact I have to wash my hair later in prep for the big day (Gonna have a lush bath cus we got soooo much in the online sales) something Beck said to me earlier has just, echoed in a weirdly factual and blunt manner. “I’m sorry you don’t have mum and dad anymore” my reply to this was something around-- --“You mean mum who needed attention on her ALL THE TIME? Naw, glad the cunts dead, she and our pussy of a father” Like, what got me with the echo was just how honest and plain my feelings were, and still are, toward my birthday being a ‘Meh’ event, as well as my dulling grief for our father and non existent grief for his wife. My mother was your classic childhood trauma induced bi-polar/autistic who was as needy as she was controlling/narcissistic/pathetic, could easily be violent and then cry when you hit back because how dare you. Like after my autism confirmation we were all like “Oh yeah she had it, spazz, untreated with all that shit from her lot, obvious overloads on the reg, despite that, my ability to sympathize is....low. Incredibly low. I get it, but at the same time, really don’t fucking care. Sorry boo-boo, my energy meter is on “Protect sister and bathe self once a month” and I’ve broken the stick thingy so like Coco, Forgotten land you go. ---- It’s sad to imagine someone not missing either of their parents, and in my case, it’s sorta darker because she died when my ass was 11 and the second we knew she was sick, I was the family cheerleader for her upcoming yeet outta the living world, like a kid, lil 11 year old dumpling child, being cool, relieved their mother was dying of some unknown/un-diagnosed illness, Like you read about this shit and wonder how bad is the fam or just how fucked in the head is that child. But thats where her behavior as a mother had me, and nowdays, I’m more done than angry with her memory. No, the anger is more aimed at Dad who at first I missed hella bad when he died, but now, I’m like “You bitch ass, pussy. I laughed my way thru a scaffold pole busting up my arm, you couldn’t even stand up to a 5′5 gremlin!” (Why does my anger always sound like Lamar?) That’s how it is now, I’m painfully (For everyone else) done/dry towards my mother, and just plain angry at my dad who now my ass kinda lowkey hates more than loves anymore because the older I get, the more the good memories get over-shadowed by his inability to emotionally protect his kids, or just protect his kids. Like I remember my mum being a dick, me stomping on her foot (I was like 8?) and he had a go at me, even after she’d jumped on me and started slapping/getting hysterical. Like I was a lil kid, and while it killed the argument real quick agreeing with her, imagine that shit from my end, she started it, a grown woman, and my ass was getting grilled, and it was always like this, especially on birthdays, it was her feelings, her shit, mums day, like thanks dude, peace. Like I’ve become more man, than my dad was. Sure he worked all his life, provided, raised a family, but on the other hand, he lost his shit, he had a breakdown, was a dickhead, at times was straight-up bad as she was (Rarely) and emotionally, was the driest mother fucker. In retrospect, he was human, wanted a quiet life, knew how to bring down a psycho bitch the only way he knew and just wanted to keep his mind busy because obviously, my dad was on the spectrum to, so as much as I wanna kick his ass, I get it, I can see why he did those things and gave in, but then, at the same time, I am allowed to be mad, and look at those fuck-ups and think how fucked it was, how much we had to deal with, how many birthdays I’ve lost and will lose the feeling for, because of them. Because she couldn’t cope, because he didn’t wanna tell her to get a fucking grip or just stand up and say “You’re being psychotic, fucking stop”. Maybe it’s a life lesson or some weird plan, like “I parent you enough to come thru this trauma and learn not to be us”, but I’m hella mad, it’s my 26th birthday in a like so many hours, even in lockdown it should be something but my brain is naturally trained to let her have it. Vowing now: My kids 26th won’t be like this. they’ll have chips, dip, all the prostitutes and all the alcohol as long ass they get drunk at home so I can make sure they’re okay. They deserve it. Even if I don’t

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randomfandomfamily · 5 years ago

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So this is a post about what I think might happen during the sequel to the Sonic Movie.

This started out as a few thoughts , turned into a lot of ideas, and eventually manifested into… whatever this is.

Look, I have exactly zero self-control, and hyperfixation is an absolute monster at this time of all the time. So like… oops, I guess? Enjoy? Maybe? I dunno. Just gonna yeet this out there and scoot.

Warning: This is a really long friggin’ post. How long? Nearly 3,000 words of pure hyperfocused writing long. I would say I’m sorry, but I don’t think you’d believe me if I did.

I know everyone is freakin’ hyped that Sonic is going to have a pal for the sequel. If past incarnations tell us anything, it’s that Sonic and Tails are 100% going to click, no problem. And I don’t doubt that is exactly what’s gonna happen this round too.

But here’s the thing. The premise for pretty much all of Sonic and Tails’ meeting before now has been Tails looking up to Sonic and Sonic deciding he’s gonna look out for Tails. They see each other as total equals, of course, but a lot of it stems from Sonic’s confidence in his abilities. Tails admires him for it, and Sonic knows he can keep Tails safe because of it. It gives Tails more confidence in himself. And that gives Sonic more confidence in Tails. They give each other the confidence and reassurance that they need.

This Sonic? This Sonic is a child. And he’s pretty much always been a child, a teen of fifteen in most cases, but we rarely see any incarnation of Sonic acting like a child. He’s usually just saving the world, and when he’s not doing that, he’s saving the world again. But the Sonic in the movie genuinely loves being a kid. And confidence in his abilities? Not so much. He used them once on purpose, and only after he had nearly died.

He’s not the usual thrill-seeking, needs to constantly be on the move, adrenaline junkie that we’re used to. He lives in house. In a small town. With friendly people and no one to fight (anymore). And he likes it that way.

Because of this, the set-up for Tails and Sonic’s relationship is going to have to be different. It’s most likely going to rely a lot on Sonic just being excited to see someone from his home planet. He might not question how Tails knows him. He might not question how Tails found him. He might not question anything at all.

The first movie taught Sonic that he absolutely does not have to be alone in life. It is, in fact, the worst way to live your life. He learns that it’s okay to rely on people, and he didn’t have to do this alone. The first movie taught him trust.

Sonic relied on blind trust in the first movie and it worked out. He trusted Tom. And in true Donut Lord fashion, Tom not only helped, but he and Maddie had pretty much adopted Sonic by the end of the movie.

Tails comes along. A resident of Sonic’s old home. Tails is nice, crazy smart, seems super interested in his powers, and also doesn’t want to kill his parents. Great! Immediate trust for Tails, too.

Now like I mentioned it before in another post, but I’m willing to bet that Tails found out about Sonic through the Echidnas. Though I’m also willing to bet that it was one specific Echidna that told him.

Gonna intervene on the Sonic/Tails analysis to bring you some unscheduled Knuckles. In all of Knuckles’ lore, he is the last known Echidna. Now they might throw that specific part of his history out for this incarnation, but it’d be interesting if they kept it.

Super Sonic was nearly a part of the movie, but they decided the main focus of the movie should be Sonic the character, not Sonic the classic hero archetype. That doesn’t mean Super Sonic will never be introduced, it could still happen. The thing is, that requires Chaos Emeralds. And who was known for his connection to those? Exactly.

Y’all wanna see somethin’ neat?

We gotta map with eight planets on it and something that looks nearly identical to a Chaos Emerald in the corner. Rings are used by advanced civilizations, and Earth ain’t one of them. Ta-da. Seven planets. Seven Chaos Emeralds. And that that circle in the middle looks like a great place for a Master Emerald, doesn’t it?

‘Wait a minute’, I hear you protest, ‘the mushroom planet is uninhabited! Why would a Chaos Emerald be there?’

Sure it’s uninhabited. You know, unless it isn’t. What proof do we have that it is? Because Sonic said it was? Because he opened up a portal, looked through it, and saw nothing?

Look, Robotnik is a brilliant scientist, I’ll give him that, but no way in New Heckistan is he going to find a way to find a way home with mushrooms alone.

But say he stumbles across a poor soul who’s trying to protect one of the seven most powerful gems in existence. Say he steals that gem and uses it to find a way back (as a mad scientist do). Maybe he even stole the set of rings that the poor unfortunate soul had. After all, there were six more gems to find. Why settle for 1/7 of the power when you could have it all?

How long has Sonic been with Tom and Maddie now? Long enough for him to be enrolled in school? Long enough for them to fix the house and start repainting? Long enough, perhaps, for a mad scientist to start fixing the remnants of his busted ship and power it with an alien source? I mean, probably. He is pretty smart.

Actually, hang on. Maybe the planet is uninhabited as far as living creatures go, but isn’t Eggman (Robotnik’s nickname from Sonic) known for having two robot assitants? That’d be an interesting way to introduce them. And they’d know the other planets, and could open the portals.

So perhaps Robotnik finds a planet with another Chaos Emerald ripe for the picking. It’s protected by, oh let’s say… a tribe of Echidnas? All sworn to protect one thing. The thing he wants. They put up a fight, of course they do, but they don’t know who they’re up against.

But maybe, just maybe, there’s one left behind. Knuckles. Who had heard tales of a being that could harness the power of the Chaos Emeralds. His tribe had tried hunting him down years ago in fear that he might steal the power for evil. They had failed. Thankfully. Because it looked that being they tried to hunt down was going to be their only chance of stopping the psycho with the mustache.

So Knuckles confides in a local inventor that he knows. A clever little Fox named Miles Prower. He tells Miles that there is someone that could help them, but it was going to be difficult to find them.

If I’m right, and Tails did find out about Sonic through Knuckles, that explains his timing. If he was just tracking Sonic’s power, he could have found Sonic after the incident at the baseball field. But he needed a reason to find Sonic, and a scientist destroying a tribe of people for a gem seems like a good reason. Might also explain why he’s hoping he’s not too late. Who knows how long it would take Robotnik to find the other Chaos Emeralds? They had to get to them first.

Sonic meets Miles, nicknames him Tails, and they hit it off immediately. Sonic is more than willing to help Tails track down the rest of these things. No way in hell Tom and Maddie are letting him go alone, so they’re coming too.

Tails doesn’t think to mention that it was an Echidna that told him about Sonic. Tom and Maddie are kind of suspicious about it at first (I thought no one else knew about him? Who is this guy and how does he know?) but Tails seems like a good kid and Sonic trusts him.

They find the first Chaos Emerald (there are probably many shenanigans that ensue, but I don’t know what the other planets are like so I can’t predict them). No one really knows what they should do with it. Keep it with them? But what if they’re confronted by Robotnik and he takes it somehow?

So Tails tell them that a friend of his back on the island that could watch over it. Robotnik wouldn’t think to go back there because he already attacked it once. That seems like a solid plan, so they go back. Sonic is thrilled to be back. Everything looks the same as it did. Except for… that part. That part looks like a warzone.

Now, why is Knuckles not part of this mission too? Not sure. Maybe he’s injured after the fight. It’s very probable that he would be. So he’s injured, grieving, worried sick about the eight year old he just sent looking for the one person that can stop Robotnik.

He’s relieved when he sees Tails with a hedgehog, who he correctly assumes is the being who can control the Emeralds’ power. He’s even relieved to see the two humans. At least someone is looking out for the kid since he’s not able to.

You know who’s not thrilled? I’ll give you three guesses, and the first two don’t count.

The phrase ‘eyes glowing with rage’ is all too literal when it comes to Sonic. And he looks ready to explode on the spot. He immediately accuses Tails of betraying him, leading him to the people that killed the only person on the island that cared about him. He even throws in a spiteful ‘Miles’ because the name ‘Tails’ was only for friends.

Tails and Knuckles don’t have time to explain before Sonic takes off like a bullet. He’s out of sight in milliseconds, but you could hear the electric energy from a mile away.

Tom and Maddie decide to hear them out, because they obviously did need their help with Robotnik on the loose. Tails explains that Knuckles is the last of his kind and really isn’t much older than Sonic. He had nothing to do with what happened to Longclaw.

So Tom offers to go talk to Sonic (huzzah for fatherly life lessons), and Maddie offers to help fix up Knuckles as best as she can. Being a vet paid off in the weirdest ways sometimes.

While Tom explains what actually happened and that no one betrayed anyone, Knuckles and Tails have reluctantly opened up to Maddie.

Knuckles has been trying to keep up that rough and tumble attitude we know and love, but it’s kinda breaking down with this nice human wrapping his arm with the bandages she brought (because of course she brought bandages, she’s a vet and a mother) and asking if he was okay. He was not okay.

And Tails… well, where was Tails’ family? Did they know where he was? Any friends he could think of that might be able to help them? That ends in a solemn silence. Tails is family-less too, and his inventions aren’t always well received on an island that is almost completely organic. There was a very kind Rabbit mother and daughter that checked on him from time to time, but other than that? He was on his own.

Maddie makes a mental note to tell Tom that they’re adopting two more alien children and no it’s not up for discussion, they’re doing it (not that Tom would have argued with her anyway).

Tom returns with Sonic, who apologizes for accusing them of betrayal and murder. That’s when he and Knuckles finally realize they’re about the same age. (I’m gonna guesstimate Knuckles’ age at around 15/16). It’s baffling to the both of them.

When Knuckles heard about the powerful being his people had hunted, he had expected… not a teenager. And worse, it happened a decade ago.His people had hunted down a toddler and, apparently, killed his parent. He was a little more understanding of Sonic’s anger.

As for Sonic, Echidnas were pretty much cold-blooded murderers to him. He had never stopped to consider that there were also, you know, kids. And this kid had just lost… everything. He instantly feels terrible about his outburst. This guy didn’t even know who Longclaw was, much less what had happened to her.

But, emotional breakthroughs aside, they still have a huge problem and his name is Eggman. Or Robotnik. It really depended on who you asked. Either way, they needed to figure out which planet Robotnik was going to be at next. They decide to just collect the Chaos Emeralds they could and worry about Robotnik later.

Sonic gives Knuckles his set of rings, just in case. They have Tails’ so they should be fine. Off to the next planet to find an Emerald. It becomes clear that they’re gonna need a more efficient way of doing this, so Tails modifies the tracker he made for Sonic to track the Emerald’s energy instead.

It works, obviously, because Tails is a precious little genius. But no one stopped to consider how the mad scientist was finding the Chaos Emeralds. It makes sense that he would find a way to track their energy by using the one he found on the mushroom planet, but nobody thinks about that until Tails finds a way to do it.

Then they remember they just left Knuckles alone with a Chaos Emerald. They open up a portal to get him, but Robotnik is already there with a monologue about how how stupid they all were for assuming he wouldn’t return to this planet, he was the smartest individual, not just on Earth, but in the entire universe, and blah blah blah, psycho scientist banter, he’s Jim Carey and his blood is made of cocaine, you get the picture.

Cue rescue sequence for the resident Echidna of the group. They manage to get Knuckles and the Emerald away from the crazy doc, maybe even steal the ones that Robotnik has, Perhaps we even get a heartfelt response from Sonic because ‘you idiot why didn’t use the rings to escape, I told you to use them, we are not losing anyone else to this fight’.

And not to bring us to an abrupt halt right there, but as I’ve said earlier, we’ve got no idea what the other planets are like, so I can’t make any solid predictions. Though I guess you can’t call anything about this solid. It’s literally all speculation.

But, you know, they get the seven Emeralds somehow because teamwork. There’s probably a bunch of cool aliens to meet, some Chao maybe? That’d be rad. And, of course, tons of fight scenes because that’s what the Eggman vs. Sonic thing is all about. Who wins: A ex-government hired genius fueled by spite and pure rage or one Spikey Child and his Fam?

I’m thinking the final fight would have to take place one that circle in the middle, which I’ve already speculated could be a possible location for the Master Emerald. And that fight would. be. dope. I mean, it’s Super Sonic, for cryin’ out sideways!

Since the good guys always win the fights, Sonic and crew win. They probably wouldn’t kill him. Why would they? They’re the good guys. Knuckles very seriously considers it though. Like, Tom kinda puts a hand on his shoulder just to make sure he doesn’t because homeboy looks like he wants to shank the local nutcase, not that anyone blames him.

(this also serves a purpose for something else that always bugs me about Knuckles’ character, which is that he is very gullible when it come to Eggman, we see it all over the place with him. a scenario like this? eradicates that odd quirk in his personality without erasing any of his other good qualities. harmless pranks? sure, gullible as all get out. Tails and Sonic could even prank him at the end of the movie, and that’d be just the sweetest thing. but when it comes to Eggman? hell nah. nah nah nah, get that outta here.)

So they beat Eggman, maybe yeet him back to mushroom planet again–this time without any kind of tech. No ship for you, Eggy-Boy.

Then it’s time to go home. Here’s where it could go two different ways. Tails is going with Sonic, that seems pretty obvious at this point, and Knuckles could go back to Earth with them too if he wanted.

I don’t think he would, though. Being Guardian of the Master Emerald is an integral part to Knuckles’ character. And while, yes I would love to see him hanging out with Sonic and Tails more, I think this is something that will have to stay part of his history.

But if you think they aren’t inviting him over for Movie Night you are mistaken, sir. Knuckles is always invited to Movie Night. He doesn’t always accept, and that’s okay. They visit him too, just to see how he’s doing.

Sonic taught Knuckles and Tails to floss and that is a vital part of the sequel, shut up, yes it is.

And viola! Sequel! Oh, but of course we need a post-credit scene, don’t we? See Sonic being around the age of thirteen does have its benefits.

Because you see, that means we can give him two years of peace with Tails and his parents before before he’s fifteen, the age most Sonic incarnations seem to stick with.

Fifteen is old enough for a rival, right? Teenagers, you know what I mean.

And I’m not saying that Robotnik had the technology to replicate DNA and modify it, but I am saying… that he probably has that kind of tech laying around somewhere.

The government seems to fund the science department pretty well. And there’s a certain individual who followed Dr Robotnik around for a while, learning all his tricks. Mmmmmmmmmm-hmmmm. Agent Stone.

And I’m not saying Agent Stone is evil….

I’m saying:

What if Agent Stone created Shadow?

*aaaaaaand fade to black*

Now, if you made it this far… wow. Thank you! Like, seriously, holy shit. This was so long. I appreciate you for sticking it out with me. It took… a while to write. I don’t wanna admit the actual amount of time it took. But really, thank you for giving this a read.

#sonic the hedgehog the movie #sonic the movie #sonic the hedgehog #just #i don't have an explanation #this isn't even the first sequel i've written #it's rise of the guardians all over again #what am i supposed to do with these #they're just existing here on Tumblr #with no purpose #essentially useless #just like the dumbass that wrote 'em #idk what i'm doing #someone halp

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imbruedinfear-a · 4 years ago

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@undeadrphub asked: ALL OF THEM FOR JAY

🍍 : how comfortable is my muse in their body? how do they feel about their height, weight, strength, and body type? how important is being attractive to them?

this man would kill to be taller in .0002 seconds if he could. he was bullied for his height, bullied for being severely underweight, bullied for feminine hips, for.. literally anything. he hates it all. as an adult, he’s managed to pull himself out of the underweight category, but it’s solely from muscle. he’s still incredibly thin and small, just as he’s always been. you can’t get him to be comfortable without an oversized hoodie to hide in. he vaguely cares about being attractive, but it’s more ‘i don’t want them to be embarrassed to be hanging out with someone as fucking ugly as i am’ than anything else. if he’s not working or going out with people, he won’t even think of trying to improve appearance.

🍅 : how does my muse feel about plastic / cosmetic surgeries & procedures? is it something they have done or would do? do they mind if others do it?

dislike. who the fuck cares about their appearance that much? granted, he’s had a nose job, but it was so he could still fucking breathe rather than cosmetics. he won’t dislike you as a person for it, but he’s going to instantly find you unappealing. it just bothers him for some reason.

🍏 : how stable is my muse’s physical health? do they go for regular or semi-regular checkups by a physician? do they have any diagnosed illnesses and / or take any medication? how often do they get sick?

stability whomst? he has two modes of health: sick once a year or sick every other week. it depends on how much food he’s been eating and whether or not he’s blown food money on beer. fuck doctors. his overall health is fucked. doctors cannot explain why he doesn’t have x problems and how he’s even still alive after all of the beatings he’s had, especially when it comes to the brain damage. he has seizures, sometimes an arm will stop working for a bit, sometimes he can’t hold anything, sometimes he’ll have a burst of amnesia. he’s a medical mystery to the point there are literal scientific articles on his case, and 98% of the time if he lands in the hospital for something they’ll just shrug it off. it’s gotten to the point he’ll break bones and still not go, because he learned how to fix that fucking problem himself when he was like 12.

🍎 : how stable is my muse’s mental health? have they been diagnosed with any mental illnesses and / or conditions? do they have any undiagnosed mental illnesses and / or conditions? do they or should they attend therapy?

:^) he’s gotten away with murder ( though it was self-defense ) through the insanity claim, which is actually really fucking hard to use. that should give you an idea of his scores on mental exams. but again, he has brain damage, and every single psych he’s ever interacted with has mentioned that they can no longer determine what’s an actual mental illness or what’s just his brain being physically unable to function correctly. he’s never been to therapy, but he’s been tested several times. his scores changed every time, for every section. the only thing anyone’s certain on is PTSD. Depression, Borderline Personality Disorder, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Antisocial Personality Disorder, General Anxiety Disorder, Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder, and Schizophrenia have been heavily considered, but even professionals argue with each other. he’s a medical mystery even in mental health. he needs therapy, but his disorders make him extremely avoidant of it. that is not to say everything i listed is true, nor is it to say there isn’t anything unlisted here.

🍑 : how meticulously does my muse look after their physical appearance? do they spend a lot of time on their hair, makeup, grooming, and clothing? is there a particular reason why they do or don’t?

oof. how anxious is he? if he’s anxious, he’ll fix himself 1000x times. if he’s not doing anything special, he’ll walk out the door without a second thought. he doesn’t spend a lot of time on anything, but he does make sure he’s well groomed and put together. it should be noted, though, he doesn’t look in the mirror. his own apartment doesn’t have one, and he avoids public restrooms like the plague. his own reflection is a fucking trigger. this is probably why his eyeliner is always smudged.

🍒 : how much does my muse value companionship? do they constantly keep people around them, or do they prefer to be alone often? do they have or desire to have many friends? do they see every meeting as an opportunity to make a new friend?

confusing as fuck. he’s lonely as hell and constantly wants to hangout with people, but he also will have periods of avoiding them like the fucking plague. he loves hanging out! he fucking hates being out! who knows! for the most part, he has a lot of friends in a lot of places and will gladly drink with any group of strangers, but he’ll yeet the fuck out if you try actually getting close to him. he’s alone, always, at home and only around people when working or getting fucked up. having other people around too often, like a roommate perhaps, will make his mental health act the fuck up.

🍇 : how would my muse describe their childhood? how much has it impacted the person they are now, or will become as an adult? around what age did they or will they start to mature, and why? do they wish to go back to their days as a child, or have they embraced adulthood?

in his words, it was a great big pile of horseshit on fire. he literally has brain damage from it. he can’t leave his own room without convincing himself it’s going to be his living room, not his childhood home, and sometimes he’ll open the bedroom door and see his father standing there, and then he’ll fucking yeet back into bed. obviously it’s impacted him just a smidge. definitely not full of self-hatred and constantly fighting himself to do shit he likes, absolutely most definitely not traumatized in a million forms and continues to trigger himself because how the fuck do you go about your day not panicking half of the time. IN OTHER WORDS, he was a fucking parent to his brother when he was only 4, he would rather die in the most slow, most painful death than return to childhood. is he even still alive bc he doesn’t know

🍐 : how intelligent is my muse overall? are they smarter than the average person, or less than? are they primarily self-taught, or did they acquire most of their knowledge in school? are they more street smart or book smart?

if you knew him before his skull was caved in, you would call him a freak for how fast he could think and solve problems. he was the type of genius you’d only heard about in stories, and he pissed off his teachers because he never even needed to be taught. show him the super simple problem once and he knew how to do everything for the next three weeks. he grew up on the streets and read shakespeare for fun. he lost it all. it now only shows rarely, on really good days, when the stars want to align.

🍉 : which of the four seasons suits my muse best, and why?

summer. he literally lived outside most of the time since he was a kid, and summer nights were easiest. outdoor concerts, parties late at night, cookouts and campfires. he also loves storms.

🍌 : is my muse inclined to help others, or will they only do it when it benefits them, if at all? what makes them this way? has it ever gotten them into trouble, or inconvenienced them?

which personality is showing most at the time? he’s gotten accused of rape for helping a woman once. let that sink in. but also, he’s helped so many people he’s protected by half the city’s underworld. who knows.

🍊 : does my muse desire romance? is it something they would actively seek out, or prefer to happen more ‘ naturally? ’ what is their love life like? do they have any exes or past flings, or crushes?

o k a y listen. these r getting too hard i literally don’t know ok can i asked which disorder or which personality is showing most at the time for this bc IT CHANGES like everything always does. mostly, he’s,, weird. he actively seeks it out in the sense he’ll go on dates regularly, but he’s not actually trying to find a girlfriend. he’s carefree. also traumatized. really wanted romance until his heart was ripped to shreds and now he’s convinced himself he’s not lovable, too complicated, extremely undesirable, and especially undeserving of it. he won’t let it happen. no one should have to suffer by having to deal with him. if you’re including things that were just for fun and both parties knew it wasn’t serious, he’s had a few girlfriends. if we’re only including serious things, then he’s only had (1) serious boyfriend. They were together for nearly two years, and they split solely because Jeremiah a) didn’t want sex as much and b) didn’t want to try any kinks. def no trauma from that, absolutely doesn’t panic abt not being good enough or wanting it enough or being pleasing or being fun or attractive or too scarred. nope. also totally doesn’t do shit he doesn’t even like / triggers him just bc they want it gotta give it to them. perfectly fuckin’ fine after one relationship.

🍓 : how is my muse typically seen by others? does it ring true to who they really are? does their reputation matter to them?

our options: 1) aggressive 2) smooth n flirty 3) soft n adorable. he is all of the above. if you’re from the city and connected to the drug world at all, there’s a big ass chance you’re aware he was a major dealer at one point, the son of a psycho serial killer, and connected to damn near every gang in some way. there are few people who would be stupid enough to hurt him, just because there’s probably some member somewhere who’s going to get revenge for it. his rep is pretty positive if ur aware he basically turned the outskirts of the city from a shithole to a really good community. otherwise, u probably just think ‘criminally insane deliquent’. he doesnt rly care about it unless u start asking about his fucking dad.

🥝 : does my muse have any ‘ unusual ’ habits, interests, and / or talents? do they hide it, or are they proud of it?

b r u h i dont fuckin know im skipping this one, he’s just obsessive compulsive about the oddest things

🍋 : what kind of diet does my muse have? do they eat regularly, or the standard 2-3 meals a day? do they have to be reminded to eat, or are they likely to remind others? do they cook, or have others cook for them? do they eat healthily, or not so much?

no diet. no food. eat if money, starve if none. remember to eat who?? o u mean eat everything. who fucking knows. he can cook really well, sometimes, maybe. pizza and taco bell 4 life. fuck vegetables. fruits are delicious and to be treasured. he mostly eats like shit, if he eats at all.

🥭 : how important to my muse is their hometown, or where they’re from? are they proud of it, or considered a hometown hero? did they move away, or do they wish to?

none. no fucks given. still here bc no money to move. would happily fuck off to Paris or something.

#undeadrphub #( Some days I live in fear that I am every fucking thing I hate. || Jeremiah Headcanon )

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bionicdragonguardian1 · 5 years ago

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Ranma 2/4

Part Two: Chapter 13 - 25

Unless someone comes up with a better name I’m sticking with this one

HOW tf is the principal crazier than before?!

Yup, spreading out the Kuno-Principal thing

Is Sasuke seriously an anime-only?!?

Like I said Ryoga needs to chill a little first

Main reason I don’t like Ukyo That scene where she blatantly states she’s fine with turning Ranma into something he’s not rather than helping him

(Ignoring the near constant amount of undermining his abilities)

“I’m gonna cheer him up” as she holds a sword! Why?!

Ranma you dummy, hug Akane!

I hate this demon/ghost cat

Shampoo, you manipulative bitch

Akane learns to swim like a normal person

The lifeguard in me can’t do it

The principal is background shenanigans

Totally forgot about the kid who wants to play video games and is “weak” bc of it

Definitely need to find a different reason tho

Lazy little shits are a pain

Also his mom is crap

Akane… why you be dumb?

Weird Happosai is Santa plot…

What is with the Excalibur meets lucky 1000 meets fairy godmother?

Good news is, with what I’ve done to Kuno’s understanding of Ranma’s curse Ranma knows Kuno wouldn’t give him that wish and calls it quits sooner

Someone just needs to explain Ranma’s really confusing sense of morality to me

Cuz it’s either on 110% or it’s nonexistent, now normally nonexistent is for Kuno but still

Look Ranma’s got ego problems but he ain’t stupid

No betting the Tendo Dojo at five!

On what planet is that a legal document?!?

Some1 tell me why Shampoo using Ranma as a stop ramp bugs me so bad

That mo when you can’t remember if the Hot Spring Challenge is when Ukyo met Shampoo in the anime…

I don’t think so…

Akane you made me need to google a word

That like never happens Ranma you idiot

So close but so far

So much more logic, thanks

I mean more insanity, but it explains why Ranma swapped clothes

Finally! Ranma apologizes

Jesus Christ someone would think I won the goddamn lotto with how loud I cheered when this happened

600% approve of this over what happened in the anime

Oof poor Ranma

Hahahaha in your face Shampoo, but I also think I know why Ranma chose it

Poor Ryoga

I KNEW this guy was coming I still hate it

YEET you can’t PAY ME to do this arc

Look, is it the fact that I had etiquette and dance classes as a child and everyone assumed this is what it was like? Probably.

It wasn’t so I won’t.

Any1 else notice how Nabiki is one of the few ppl that uses she/her when Ranma is in his cursed form no matter what?

Why does this bug me?

Akane, stop beating Ranma up, honestly

This is closer to abuse rather than teasing

*sighs*

Gotta work that out of the narrative, intentional or not

Every1 sayin she’s violent isn’t helping

Like I said really fucking morally GREY Nabiki

How grey can you go before you get black?

Let’s find out together

Can everyone PLEASE stop treating Ranma like an object?!

I literally can’t tell if Nabiki is fucking Aro or not…

STRESS

Why is this so hard?!

I hate seeing Akane cry

I know she’s playing Ranma like a kazoo, but the point still stands

WHY ARE YOU TWO SO DUMB?!

Nope, nevermind it’s just Ranma that’s a fuckin idiot I blame Genma

No, I’m not kidding

*sighs* I don’t condone Nabiki doing this in any way just for the record THAT’S not an apology Ranma!

This mess is totally your fault Nabiki

STRESS

am I intentionally pointing out where this work of fiction is stressing me out since I’m now online schooling and suffering for it? Yes, fuck off.

Actually, don’t.

But Fuck Covid19

Aww his hat’s back!

Why do I love his hat so much?

No, seriously Akane’s so cute!

Oooww tree

y’know the sec she realized what Ranma was doing Nabiki should’ve TOLD him!

Congrats Ranma ya got the wrong sis- I mean the right- but wrong- dammit y’know what I mean

Some1 give me a logical explanation for why Ranma goes on a date with a panda doodle, PLEASE

I do appreciate the epic battle background fight for the anime

Further proof that Happosai sucks

Manga name’s somehow less believable I think it’s the use of “snowman” rather than “yeti”

Did Soun just find out that Pchan is Ryoga, and say nothing?

Ooo, Imma commit arson

Remember when I said obey Physics and Medical, I meant it

Arson is wrong and I know this but “transgender bitch” crosses the line

I will do it

Shampoo is a fucking yandere psycho

Just sayin “we’ll see who can get him first”

honestly, any other group and I’d be annoyed, but these four can’t work together for shit I

’m still pissed at Taro, but he can kill Happosai, please

I can’t tell if Shampoo, Mousse and Ryoga are being purposefully obtuse or not

I just reread their names I know the answer to at least two of them

Idk how I feel about Kuno-amnesia we’ll see

yep, Kuno gives me the creeps w or w/out his memories

kinda wish this was anime

jesus christ, poor Ranma

press f to pay respects for Ranma’s stomach

InstaRegret

Also Ukyo’s assumption that some1 can make Ranma doing anythin he doesn’t want to is crap

Like HELLO! Wake up moron!

Nabiki, I mean this in the nicest way possible, shut the fuck up

You’re making it worse

Also TALK to each other you ding dongs!

OH RIGHT! I almost forgot about the biggest fucking insult that Ukyo said of her own freewill!

It also proves that she doesn’t know Ranma as a person AT ALL!

It’s not a pick one or the other kind of thing

The fact that she thinks Ranma would accept that is insulting

The fact that she thinks that is insulting and makes me hate the patriarchy

Again, treating him like a prize than a person

*tries not scream, sighs*

Nabiki, you’re the cause of at least 30% of the stress I get from this

You having feelings ain’t the fucking problem here Ukyo, you not acknowledging Ranma’s is

I hate fake criers, anyone who does this I hate you

Always let others in on your plans, kids

When’s every1 gonna realize Ranma’s “wishy-washy” cuz no one’s ever committed to HIM before?

This episode confused me, I’m prepared to be MORE confused

Less confused, I’m surprised

Gonsunkugi, you creep

There is SO much wrong with this

*shudders*

WHAT?!

Y’know I didn’t think Gosunkugi could surprise me, I was wrong

Happosai still sucks unfortunately for all of us he’s now weird on top of it

I love how much Ranma needs to be kicked in the teeth to get any character development out of him

Ryoga is my #1 choice for it, always

Ranma… why are you like this?

Genma, emotional range of a goddamn wall

I am jealous of Ranma’s brain

I could be SO mean with the Shishihokodan

Also, are they implying that Ryoga has depression?

Gimme Ranma’s brain

I won’t ask for his confidence cuz that’s impossible but I want his brain

In Akane’s defense, given what she knows she couldn’t’ve known how badly that would affect Ryoga

I ain’t gonna say “leave Shampoo” cuz that’s cruel

I like the “turn into a Cat” rather than the “Can’t Cross” & the use of New Year’s rather than random but this still brings around the fact that she doesn’t LISTEN to him

Mousse you’re NOT helping in fact you’re actively making it worse did you miss when he said blatantly “I don’t wanna”

oh, sure, NOW you’re ok with it

ugh Mousse, you have a brain, I’ve SEEN you use it. Do so now.

This entire episode weirded me out

IDK if it’s the age-dff or the fact that he was makin it up and somehow everyone thought this was okay …

I won’t YEET it but MASSIVELY change

heheheh

Light bulb

NOPE I’m keeping this surprise to myself

it was a rather sweet end tho

Oh, this episode is a mess and a half, honestly

Also Nabiki, congrats you’ve literally enabled a stalker S

o many laws are broken here

okay, so Kodachi not being in on Ranma’s secret after so long makes sense purely because she doesn’t go to their school

however, with what i’ve done to make Kuno marginally less dumb it makes a little bit less sense…

I literally hate Kuno with what I’ve done to his logic of Ranma’s transformation, but that’s the point Kodachi… how do I handle you… oh, duh!

Ok, so Kodachi is now also terrible

I’m trying to figure out where this is in the plot since there is ZERO

Ok, there’s a LINE, Nabiki

This one would be touching, if it didn’t end the way it does

TALK gentlemen!

It won’t kill you

Fuck a parent that says they’re not your parent for no reason, EVER

I am going to make this hurt

Also gonna take out Genma’s fail at stealth

Remember I said Akane’s going to learn to cook

heheheh

sorry, I just love this idea

Oh this is SO against the rules it’s not even funny

tiny adjustment so they actually have quasi-competent referees

Crazy wants crazy?I won’t stop ‘em

I reiterate: CHEATING!

I am aware that the “ending” apparently sets them back to the start in terms of their relationship but I swear to God if they pretend shit like this didn’t happen I will scream

Someone ships something other than Akane x Ranma PLEASE explain why/how

don’t ship bash but I would insight when you explain

STICK TO CANON

please trust me, I’m a multi/poly/crack shipper

(for frame of reference to a bnha I ship DabiHawks)

I understand the appeal of Fanon

however, I would like to stick to Canon here

so no Fanon

Canon Only

Fully love that high kick

Genma shows Ranma’s secret here, but they already know… so… I shall find out

Ooo, you’re not getting out of this Ranma

Do you know how tempting it is for Akane to at least tell Ranma she’s a girl- oh wait gendered sports… right…

Ranma…

if you didn’t realize it was Akane when she hit you for calling her klutzy I can’t help you

I want to commit arson at some of the comments…

but can confirm that these are HS boys

Doesn’t mean I gotta like it

I was wondering how long I was going to have to wait before tearing into Nodoka

FINALLY

Took me WAY too long to remember that Nodoka calling Ranko tomboyish is due to how he speaks in Japanese

I’ll need to figure that out since… English

Can I explode on Genma’s choice to take Ranma at TWO?!

Can I further explode on both of them for making a TWO YEAR OLD “sign” a Seppuku Pledge?!

I hate both of them, honest

ALSO communication!

Genma! Just fucking TELL HIM!

Making her transphobic is SO tempting

I don’t mean in a “i hate you” way I mean in a “I sheltered my whole life” way

It’s still bad, and painful, but she can easily learn from that

Or be worse, this could go 2 ways

I feel so bad for Akane for this entire conversation

Also poor Ranma like ouch…

Awkward

I’m going to make this hurt something fierce

Slight change since I’m hoping Ranma isn’t as “peak fight or flight” by this point

Genma don’t be an asshole for FIVE MINUTES

Please, that’s all I want

If she doesn’t learn the truth before the end I will make a bad decision

Really, I will

Don’t kill Genma, you can’t

Akane, don’t say like you wouldn’t… honestly

Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth, honestly, just look the other way Ranma

*sigh*

Ranma…

See, this kind of crap here is why I really don’t like Cologne

any other day Akane’d be right

oof, that means he self aware that girls flock to him

I’m quite frustrated by that if I’m honest

Ranma is clueless about all the wrong things

I love him but God I wanna punch him sometimes

Why is there a swing from the ceiling?!

I had a jolt from the way they set that panel up, thanks

Are you trying to kill me?!

Thank you Cologne, now fuck off

Oh thank God, at least he learned

This is nonanime stuff so I have no clue what’s happening but anything to make Happosai miserable

I’m enjoying this immensely

ugh, “think of it as a compliment” ghost

Eat me

okay, yeah, as much as I want him dead, that’s worse

I’m glad he’s not a one-and-done character

I will forever ONLY call him Taro when it is NonDialogue

Wait Saffron as in big-bad Saffron?

I literally only know pieces of the end so I’m just pulling from what I know

Lol, wait… was that soldier Anime only too?

I almost liked you there for a sec Taro

Now I’m pissed again

bravo

Oh, YIKES

… if Ranma falls into the Spring of Drowned Twins would he split?

I’m not going to DO IT, obviously!

I’m just curious okay…

that answers that… and kills anyone other than Ranma’s plan to turn back to normal I hope everyone is aware of that

oof

Since when is there a castle on an island in Japan

tis just a scratch, I’ll admit that was funny

Ranma… your stomach gets you in so many problems

ok, that was wholesome

I approve

Okay, so my understanding is that Mrs. Tendo got sick, so I can understand the reactions to Kasumi

BUT I still find it odd because… well… anyone in my house gets sick and you mostly can’t even tell I mean, minus a worse attitude and a mask, other than that though, nope we keep ‘er movin’

I’m moving this section sooner EVEN IF IT KILLS ME!

I like her mom’s cookbook tho

I could make a Ranma x Ryoga joke here, but I won’t

I also won’t make a Ranma x Ryoga joke chapter cuz I’m nice like that

Actually I might have no choice

I’m FINE just dying

Help

my multishipper heart is dying here

I love this

InstaRegret for THREE people

If nothing else, I’m impressed

(well three once Ranma’s back to normal)

I need help

Fangirling/Fanboying/Fanpeopling is dangerous folks, remember that

Poor Ryoga

Though I too feel that right now like where do I look because everything coming in at mach 6

I’m changing that one scene tho cuz I can’t justify the aftermath without it

This… is… weird to say the least

I feel like I should just expect anything with Gosunkugi remotely involved to be weird at this point

okay, not as weird as I expected

glad it was short tho

I think I am officially out of anime terf

YAY, new content!

This is why I ask about any ship that isn’t Ranma x Akane

Also, names?

That- that- that can’t...

I DIDN’T NEED TO KNOW THAT!

EWWW

gross

WHY?!?!!

also, biology, that’s not how that works!!

You two ARE idiots

Ryoga you die I’ll kill you

Well… that hurt to see so quick…

Ranma, get up!

I officially hate this Herb guy

ok, so if you put HOT water in the ladle do you stay that way forever?

Alright! Way to go Ryoga!

I need to stop shipping Rivals it’s bad for my health

fucking eat it you dick!

Poor Akane

nevermind, Ranma you idiot

awwwww

ok, so that whole no more Anime-content… I was wrong, and I admit that, but still

I’m just thinking of my bff when they realize she’s an adult cuz, yeah, she’s like that too

except like physically an adult unlike tiny-Hinako

oh MY GOD Ukyo you’re driving me up the goddamn wall I swear!

THANK YOU AKANE!

“You’re all Ranma’s fiancées” when only one of them actually is

GIANT SIGH OF ANNOYANCE

Ranma, learn to communicate, PLEASE!

Okay… so is this where they figured it out or are some ppl still in the dark?

TIMELINE!!

Honestly, mood Ranma, mood

This entire plot line confuses me if I’m being totally honest

I mean I live for the Akane focus, but there are so many better ways to do this

#ranma ½ #ranma 1/2 #ranma saotome #ranma #akane tendo #nabiki tendo #kasumi tendo #soun tendo #genma saotome #nodoka saotome #tatewaki kuno #kodachi kuno #full series au #bc I know no restraint #I'm doing this to distract from stress shut up #don't judge me #COVID19 binge watch

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pvssipower · 5 years ago

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( naomi scott, 20, she/her ) class is in session for DREW MONROE. the student file says they’re a VAMPIRE belonging to house FLARION and currently a TENTH year. we see here they are UNDISCIPLINED and DESTRUCTIVE, but they’re also PERCEPTIVE and STRAIGHTFORWARD. we wish them good luck in the new school year, where they’ll learn POTIONS/ALCHEMY AND TRANSFIGURATION.

background ( tw for death, murder, kidnapping, cults, dissociative identity disorder. )

joseph and rebekah monroe met in arcanas and even were some of the school’s sweethearts. they graduated, got married, achieved a bunch of prestige and money both in the magical world as well as the human and had a beautiful daughter which they named: DREW.

except-- all of this is true, up to the part where they had her.

for what is worth. drew thinks she was born into this family, but she doesn’t know the reality that when she was a child-- the people who claimed to be her parents actually murdered her biological one and kidnapped her to raise and shape her as their own.

[ this was literally done out of spite in some bigger plot the monroes had against drew’s bio fam, don’t fucking @ me ]

being raised by the monroes wasn’t the best-- while they gave her what she needed. they were really strict and cold. it didn’t help that growing up drew was prone to outbursts ( that sometimes would end up in setting things on fire ) and was rather rebellious and mischiveous from a young age. there was no way for drew to know what was real and what was not, she was raised as a vampire and a monroe. arcanas was never in the picture as they decided to homeschool her, she didn’t even know about the school’s existence until she was around 13 when her parents put their bigger plan in motion.

they left her alone for days and when they came back... they were worse than before. in their little time away they had turned off their humanity and done fuck knows what with a bunch of other alumni/followers. the first thirteen years of drew’s life-- from the moment she was kidnapped to the way she was raised and kept in the dark about everything else-- was the first step. now the second step would commence; she’d get introduced to the life they wanted for her. to the cult ( because lbr, they were a cult ) they had built over the years. and when she was old enough, the third step would be done: kill her to stop the aging and force her to shut down her humanity.

so how does the school come in?

WELL, someone had already tipped in that the monroes were fucking crazy. so one night, they came in to try and retrieve the child to bring her in to a safe haven. of course, dear ol’ joseph and rebekah didn’t go down without a fight. ( second set of parents killed in front of her salad, let’s go ) haha.. jk... unless.

shout big fucking out for jude montague who protected her through this rough night and pulled the 13 year old kid from getting caught in the crossfire that was the monroes vs arcanas. it was him who brought her in and walked her through her first arcanas breaths. mind you, drew was hella shook, especially as once she arrived in the middle of the third year-- news have spread like wildfire. the girl with the parents that went cucko. that made choices on their own. they were evil-- and the apple didn’t fall far from the tree, did it? it didn’t help that because of the sudden change, drew kept mostly to herself... surely, this didn’t last for too long.

personality:

an opportunist. really, she noticed how much shit was smeared all over her name she said ‘gotta use this for something.’ the chaotic bitch that somehow doesn’t always get suspended.. or arrested. down with anything. will randomly burst in your room at 3am. party hard. probably tells first graders to grab another bus for the lols. ( it only actually happened once, okay? the rest are rumors. ) a bit of a fuckgirl, listen-- idk what happened here. i said you’re gay, and she said okay, but i’m also this. speaking of: she’s rather friendly even if there are people who still think she’s a blood thirsty ( haha irony ) psycho who will snap at any moment. she has friends, for the most part, either because they noticed she wasn’t as bad, were too naive to notice, or wanted to see her snap. by the way, surprisingly, she’s not really into throwing hands and tries to ignore or walk away instead. BUT.

that brings us to....

headcanons:

i did say people started noticing she wasn’t some psycho... haha, well, the opinions are still mixed. and certain incident didn’t help her care, at all. three years ago, she was at a party when some bitch from lumina that liked to shade her was too much and drew killed her...... sike. okay, she didn’t, but she did plummet her down in a totally not sexy way, and wouldn’t have stopped if some of her friends hadn’t pulled her away. to the surprise and dismay to some, she didn’t get expelled. but the stigma came back again. like i’ve mentioned, it happened three years ago-- we don’t like to talk about that. especially because... drew doesn’t remember. she would’ve thought this was the alcohol, but this hasn’t been the only time it’s happened. while it’s not always-- she seems to forget pieces of time, and it’s been freaking her out. it also doesn’t help that she’s slowly starting to become paranoid because of this. but in this house we don’t acknowledge stuff so haha guess she’s ignoring that shit :)))

in a few words to that one: i’m going for some dr. jekyll/mr. hyde kind of thing here.

while her name is drew, and i have been refering to her as that so far-- she’s mostly known as MONROE and gets called by that. ( to the point that if she gets drew she might go ??’?¿¿¿?¿’¿ who -- unless you’re special. ) do people even know her name is drew??? we just don’t know..

someone: who the fuck is drew? drew: some bitch, idk.

because, lo and behold, she has a nickname, surprise, surprise. some other incident ( yeah, this bitch has many ) and that’s no other than PIG SHITTER. it started because of some story about pigs and her making a typo. so yeah, pig shitter somehow stuck and hey, guess what? she got on the fucking train. opportunist.

TLDR: chaotic neutral vamp/fire hoe with a side of mr. hyde. goes by monroe or pig shitter to 99% of the school population. some people think she’s bad kind of crazy, some others good kind. really good at potions and transfiguration tbh. has probably never had good romantic relationship yeet.

how did your muse become their species? were they born or made?

- she was born.

at what age did your muse join arcanas?

- recruited at 13.

was your muse recruited or did they enroll on their own accord?

- recruited. what would your muse do if they found out that the zanzara orb was stolen from the armory?

- become the “.....anyway” meme.

I PROMISE THIS INTRO WILL FINISH.

like this post if you want to plot with this bitch. we can go from 0 to 10 real quick.

-the lumina bitch she plummeted down in a totally non sexy way. -flings pls. ( i do want the homoerotic sexual tension. fight me. ) -S Q U A D. - enemies. -frienemies. -someone she got lost with in a pig farm. idk. -this is my crack character anything goes.

#arcanas:intro #intro #about

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nathalie-sancoeur-assistant · 5 years ago

Note

Wot if Nathalie died or left offscreen in Chat Blanc and that led Gabe to be a big evil psycho man and bodyslam his kid

That moment when Nathalie leaving you compels you to yeet Adrien across Paris with your cane.

“Maybe if I do this enough she’ll come back to yell at me”

It would explain why we didn’t see any Mayura in the episode.

#chat blanc #chat blanc spoilers

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lils-of-the-valley · 3 years ago

Text

I posted 6,856 times in 2021

70 posts created (1%)

6786 posts reblogged (99%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 96.9 posts.

I added 2,434 tags in 2021

#ml - 758 posts

#sk8 - 300 posts

#renga - 225 posts

#pokemon - 222 posts

#ace attorney - 193 posts

#loz - 168 posts

#writing - 156 posts

#laugh rule - 150 posts

#<3 - 137 posts

#lovestruck - 125 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#ou sinon je veux travailler pour arrêter de stresser mais là le stress fait que je veux pas travailler so genre... cercle vicieux de stress

My Top Posts in 2021

You know what time it it! ML reaction! Because these are fun to do

I'm very excited to see something revolving around Shanghai and China. I always loved ML because it was the first time I got to see my own heritage in a show (French and Chinese) so now I'm excited for the China part!

Already digging the prologue part of this

I thought it was Mari speaking at first, but nope

I'm both happy and disappointed in the hair stripe on the girl (Fei??)

Oh no! I just got Wu Shifu and he's already dead???

Poor baby, she's already got it so rough.....

Guardian Bug!

Summer vacation for the kids!!

Hawkmoth not being active is hella sus.... And Mari knows it too

"I'm going to be late, something came up" "why am I not even surprised?" Is so fucking funny to me???

Also the animation is beautiful here, just wanted to point it out

Adrien was shipped off to Shanghai?? Oh no, Mari, no, don't look at your package like that....

As we know, Gorilla does not like flying, but he seems so much calmer than in the NY special

"besides, I'm happy to spend time with you, father" BABY PLEASE! NO! YOUR FRIENDS ARE BETTER THAN THAT ASSHOLE

BITCH GAB JUST DITCHED HIS KID WHEN HE JUST SAID HE WANTS TO SPEND TIME WITH YOU

Nooroo, I don't think you understand. This man is psycho

Started 15 years ago??? What the fuck Gab???

Mari, I don't think you can--- you know what, go off. I respect your efforts

Tom wtf

Aw, Sabine and Tom are so happy and excited. That's so cute

Uncle is so happy but also so sad omg... He's so sweet

Gab is an asshole, again.

Wait, did he just tell his 15 y/o kid to go explore Shanghai alone? (I know Gorilla will be there, but still)

So I'm guessing the Cheng's speak Mandarin because I don't recognize the words

I really like that they included the fact that Sabine changed names when she immigrated.

Mari really said I will explore this unknown city all alone and find Adrien

Props to the person who did the subs. "[he may know how to speak Chinese - but I don't]" has got to be the funniest thing I've ever seen

CN merch and NY hero merch! I forgot Gorilla collects those

Soft Adrien! He loves Gorilla so so much!

Every time I see Gabriel Agreste, I want to punch him in the face

Master of disguises guardian girl!

Of course Gab cancelled on his kid

Oh Mari, you managed to spit him

Oh shit, Mari just got pick pocketed (which sadly is not uncommon in China...)

Aww, Adrien making dumplings! This kid needs a loving family

Mari, that's a shitty drawing of earnings.

Adrien is such a sweetie who wants to surprise Mari

200 yuan, that's like... 30$ no?

This is manipulation at its finest

Plagg's got a point, how is Chat gonna explain that he's in Shanghai?

Mari is really not great at disguises

I still can't believe they let 2 kids run along through Shanghai all alone

I really wish I knew Mandarin...

On one hand, I get Mari. On the other, this girl is a pro pickpocket

Chaton loves Mari si much 🥺🥺🥺

Ok, so is Wu Shifu not dead?

Honestly fuck Gabriel Agreste.

Does no one hear Hawkmoth's monologue?

SOFT LB! YOU CAN'T TELL ME SHE DOESN'T LOVE HER KITTY

Jfc Hawkmoth, stop yeeting children

I really dint like this Akuma. His face creeps me out

Other miracle box?

She a teddy bear who named herself LadyBear

Longg? There's two of them?

Oh shit, she almost punched him in the balls

KITTY!!!!

Lol Hawkmoth's dead

KITTY NO!!!!

Like I feel bad for Fei, but Kitty hurts

Also she doesn't live by the hide your identity philosophy it seems

I kinda wanna look up the meaning of the names now...

Here's my kitty????

Fuck Hawkmoth is back

MEISHI IS SO CUTE HOLY SHIT BABY LION

Curious: how old is Sabine? If Uncle is 60?

Also, Uncle is an Adrinette shipper

So he raised Sabine? That's actually so cute

Wait, what the fuck did Mari say? I'm sorry, I never learned Chinese!

My final rating: again, I really liked it. I think I preferred the NY one, but might just because it was gayer and got really excited over that? And I'm more accustomed with American culture, but I really liked the Shanghai special. It brought up a lot of memories of when I went to China which was fun. Also I loved the animation. Just wished Gabriel stayed dead....

31 notes • Posted 2021-04-05 19:20:31 GMT

Sorry y'all, I know I'm late, but I didn't have time yesterday. So HERE ARE MY THOUGHTS AND REACTIONS REGARDING GUILT TRIP LETS GO!

Why am I not surprised that Rose had an imaginary friend that was a unicorn in 6th grade?

And she's so small, I want to hug her

She's so positive, I need that in my life

Juleka is so worried about her girlfriend :(((

Oop-- Mari, maybe that wasn't a good idea

Juleka, no, baby.....

I know I say this every time, but fuck Hawkmoth

The heart vision, I feel like it's been so long

I love how Mari can just turn off her nervousness because her friend's wellbeing is more important than her crush

What the fuck is that sketch place they're going in

The fuck is that portal thing???

Adrien is so kind and sweet, I love him

Oh, it's a boiler room

I know they're all worried about this chronic illness and that they are teenagers, but breath kids, deep breaths, you're all going to panic and I don't know who it will hurt more: yourself or already devastated Jules

Kim is such a dork, I love him

I love all the kids, that's no secret and I will never hide it

The class is so tight-knit, that's so sweet. They all care so much about each other, I wish we were like that growing up

HA HA GET FUCKED HAWKMOTH

Juleka is freaking out and I get it because they said they wouldn't treat Rose any different, but baby, I need you to breathe. I'm sure Rose loves to hear this, it's honestly really nice to be told that people care about you

See, she's so happy

Ok guys, maybe y'all are laying it a little thick here

MARC!!!!! BABY I MISSED YOUUUU

An apple a day keeps the doctor away?

Ok, Rose's like squinty "You're hiding something from me" is really cute

Aww, we stan an honest girlfriend

We really didn't have enough Rose content until now. I love her so much??? I love how positive she is about what she's going through and how she's not having any of the class's overprotective shit, all while not telling them off

The group hug!!!!

The fucking panic at a sneeze.....

I feel so bad for Juleka. It's not your fault, baby

"betraying a best friend" I think you mean girlfriend, sir (I know, I know, they won't make it canon...)

Can they not become new akumas? Because honestly, I do not like Reflecta

Miss Meldieve (idk how to spell her name) being sucked into the blackhole should not make me laugh so hard

There's something unsettling about the goob balls being spit out and I really don't like it. Makes me a little uncomfy

Yeah, the goobs makes me very uncomfortable. Should I talk to my therapist about this?

What Chaton gonna self destruct???

Rose to the rescue!!!

She doesn't have the magic of a magical girl wand, she has the power of positivity!

THE LADYNOIR FLIRTING!!!

Did LB's suit power up?? I really like this new suit. Highkey wanna make a new LB cosplay with that design now

THE POWER OF JOYYYY

Daizzi is so cute, omg

ROSE HAS THE CUTEST MIRACULOUS HOLDER OUTFIT!!!!! I WANT IT!!!

That was so simple, we need more than those

Well shit, there's angry amoks

Ok, this episode had a simple solution to things. That's a nice change.

Wait, LB has that power now to give protective charms?? That's amazing

Aw, the class is back to normal

Ok, so final thoughts. I actually really enjoyed the simplicity of the episode, no big physical fights. I like the mental/emotional battle of the episode! And positivity always wins! So, remember y'all! You're awesome and I love you!! You might be feeling down, but don't give up! Positivity isn't always easy, but you can manage it, even if it's a little thing! I believe in you and so does Rose! LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!

43 notes • Posted 2021-05-06 03:32:52 GMT

Gang of secrets reaction time! I've been avoiding tumblr all day for this, so let's goooo!!!!

Forgetting the pound it? That's sad.....

Lol, Chat bringing Ladybug to see a movie

Uuuhhh, hey Ladybug? Are you projecting by any chance? Are you thinking about your Luka/Adrien (and maybe Chat) situation?

Oh, baby, you're heart broken because if your Luka and Adrien thing.....

I still don't get it why Juleka mumbles

Oof, no one knew about the break up until Luka (who looks devastated) told his sister about it

Alya baby.... At least she's not mad about it. Alya is such a good best friend!

THEIR HANDSHAKE OMG

The girl squad is so cute omg, I love them so much

Trixx is trying so hard to cheer Mari up

Aww, the bracelet idea is so cute

Alix really does not want to put up with this love affair bullshit, but she's also so understanding

Mari, baby, no, you can't live your life as Ladybug

Oof, Mari, that's a little harsh. I know you're hurt and hiding a secret, but girl. But like... I can't think of what she could have said.... Because I know if Mari said she wanted to be alone, they wouldn't have left bc they'd be worried, but also....

I'm honestly saddest for Alya because Mari was her first friend and her best friend

I liked that multi Akuma shot

SEASON 1 AKUMAS

Oh look, Juleka can talk

I love learning about what happens when kwamis use their powers without holders

The fuck did Trixx do? Oh-- lol, the Eiffel Tower

Plagg "hey it wasn't me this time!" The kwami

Mari is so sad :((( she knows she's to blame, that she was the one who provoked this, but like, what could she do

Alya and LB heart to heart 💖💖💖

ALYA BABY YESS BREAK IT BREAK THE AKUMA HOLY FUCK YES

IM SO PROUD OF ALYA

I missed Rena so fucking much

Chat and Rena working together!!!

I love the team work

Bye bye little butterfly~~

Triple pound it

I still hate Hawkmoth

Aww, LB and Alya hug

Awww Mari saying she loves her friends and confiding in her friends about her heart break

Alya reminding Mari that she's her best friend

That hand grab!

Mari's mental break down is breaking me omg

Alya is so supportive, she's the best best friend

HOLY FUCK SHE DID IT

I DIDNT THINK SHE WAS ACTUALLY GOING TO SAY IT

I SAW THE SPOILERS BUT I DIDNT THINK IT WAS CANON

So final thoughts, HOLY FUCK. OMG. I don't even know where to start. The episode was great to build the girls' friendships, especially between Alya and Marinette (I've been missing them) but like, HOLY FUCK. I'm gonna need a few days to process this 1000000/10, best one so far

58 notes • Posted 2021-04-17 21:22:59 GMT

All I know of Miraculous now days is that Luka should legally be allowed to say fuck

78 notes • Posted 2021-08-07 14:36:05 GMT

It's been 24 hours and I'm still thinking about Gang of Secrets. I'm mostly thinking of what this will do to Alya and Marinette's friendship. And I know Mari was super worried that it would change everything, make things bad between them, but I think this will be great for their friendship.

We know that Alya has been super invested in LB since the beginning (see the LadyBlog being a thing) but now she'll have all this back scoop on the whole situation. And I'm not saying she's going to use it to her advantage, but in a way she can. Because now she can go to Mari/LB and ask her directly if publishing something is okay with her and if it's correct. I don't know what it's like running a blog on a celebrity, but I don't think Alya ever wanted to make LB uncomfortable, so now she can get Mari to proofread what she publishes to make sure it 1) doesn't compromise her secret (sometimes you can slip up without meaning to or even realizing you did), 2) doesn't make Mari uncomfortable.

And I want to talk about the LadyBlog a bit more.

Now that Alya knows, she will have to pretend that she doesn't know who LB is because she has to continue the LadyBlog (it would be sus if she shut it down just like that). Do y'all realize the shenanigans the girls can do with this now? Alya, knowing who LB is, putting out conspiracy theories like "What if Ladybug is actually [insert super famous celebrity]? What if the magic makes whoever is under the mask seem like a teenager just to cover up who they really are? Is it even possible for teenagers to be that strong and still manage class work? Thoughts?" and both girls crying at how dumb that sounds. They could fuck with Paris so easily and have so much fun with it (And y'all can't convince me that there isn't a dumb conspiracy theory page in the LadyBlog)

And the gossip column of the blog. We all know that Alya is a big LadyNoir shipper. Now that she knows that Mari is LB, she 100% will tease Mari about Chat, but she also will respect Mari's boundaries and not push that agenda onto her. If Mari says she doesn't like Chat, then that's that. But in the LadyBlog? Again, Mari will be there with her. Can y'all imagine the "Mari, look at how he's looking at you. And that boop you did! Can I please publish this?" "Only if you let me write the article that goes with it and I stay anonymous" and cue Mari writing this really shitty LadyNoir fanfic that half of Paris reads and love because "The characterization is amazing!" (Also, Adrien reads it every night because it feels so real)

The girls will have so much power after this, so much chaotic potential. I'm living for it

Also, more on the practical side, but Alya can totally help cover for Mari. In the past seasons, Mari has seemed like a shitty friend to her friends for being late and missing hangouts and all that, but now Alya will know why and can totally cover up for her. I know that everyone just goes "Well, it's Mari, of course she's late/not here" but after a while, it feels like shit, but with Alya being able to cover? It will make things a bit better. There's still going to be the whole "well, you know Mari, probably lost track of time," but she can also totally pull things like "Oh, shit, I'm so sorry! I forgot to tell you guys that Mari is going to be late! Her parents need her at the bakery for a little longer, so sorry I forgot to tell you guys!" so the burden is a little less on Mari. And that will lessen Mari's stress by a bit, at least. Having someone in her corner will help her so much

And this is just the girls in their day to day life. This isn't even taking in account what will happen with Alya helping out Mari as the guardian or as Ladybug. I just.... I love their friendship so much and I'm so happy Mari told Alya. I'm just... so happy.

176 notes • Posted 2021-04-18 19:57:31 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #very funny that sk8 is number 2 for the tags #given that I don't reblog sk8 stuff here #and I havent reblogged sk8 stuff here since... september?#very funny to me

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