#this is the most physical contact they’ve had in weeks lmao | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

honey-hippie-harper · 3 years ago

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AFGHSAGHJS THIS IS SO LATE IS NOT EVEN FUNNY ANYMORE LMAO

In my defense, I stopped being a person long ago and now, in all the ways except physical, I happen to be a potato. BUT ANYWAY :’) This is for the Renegades Ship Week hosted by @greasicookies <3 (Thanks again!), for day 5, which is Maxpie. The prompt is “secrets”! <3

I had a tough time writing this because I’m going through a lot of stuff rn :’) still, I hope you can enjoy it x’ddd.

Tag list: @healing-winston-pratt @obsidianfr3sk @the-wee-woo-rita and afsghagshja @all-weather-is-bad (because this is a very...me fic lol and I think you’re already used to my sad attempt at humor haahahaah i’M SORRY AGSHJAKL) AND @lackadae because agshjs I made a reference to one of your drawings, hon :’) (I promise once again, to catch up with your content once I feel better afsghjak).

And that’s it. I hope you like it <3

When Max turned nine, he reached the conclusion that everybody forgot their early years at some point. Before, Adrian had already explained to him that wasn’t quite true, because he misunderstood Max’s statement and thought he was feeling bad about himself for not being able to recall certain things. He told him that, unlike what he thought –which was false because that’s not what Max meant- people usually couldn’t store those memories from when they were younger than three.

“Some people do.” He said. “But it’s normal if you don’t remember anything from when you were…I don’t know. Two.”

“Do you remember anything from when you were two?” Max asked him.

From the other side of the glass, Adrian scrunched up his nose. And then, obviously, he saw himself in the need to adjust his glasses.

“I’m not quite sure whether I was two or not. But I do know I was younger than five.” He started. “There was a small canal on the way to the apartment. When it rained, it would grow a lot. It didn’t have big torrents or anything, but it did grow a lot. The water usually went higher than my ankles. But the thing was…that every time it grew, it became infested with turtles.”

He paused for a second.

“I really liked turtles.” He continued, shrugging. “My mother used to let me walk down to the water, as long as she was right behind me, obviously; one day, when we were coming back from the city, she stopped to attend a call. I got too impatient and went down alone when she wasn’t looking. The next thing I remember is that, just when I was getting up after catching a turtle, I felt her tugging me by the back of my shirt. The turtle fell on its shell.”

At that point, Max realized he had been staring at how he kept on fidgeting with his pen instead of looking him in the eye, but he continued doing so, because he didn’t like it when Adrian’s voice turned that serious.

“…She had never screamed at me like that.” He said, as if he were talking to himself and then, to erase the tension, he tried to scoff. “I don’t remember what she said, but I remember that she said it so loud I told her she was scaring the turtle. Then I started crying. Like, a lot. I think she was terrified too.”

In the end, everything turned too quiet for his liking, and Max did something his dad had advised him to do for times like these, when he just didn’t know what came next: Improvise.

“I didn’t know you liked turtles.”

“…Well, I did. I really liked turtles when I was younger.”

Max had seen a couple of turtles in his life, but not as many as Adrian had seen, he supposed, because Max had never stepped outside, except when he was a baby.

Which was exactly the point.

He didn’t have memories from when he was a baby, or a toddler. Most of the people who had come to talk to him had said they remembered events that were either too sad (like Adrian) or meaningful in their lives. Max didn’t have anything like that. In fact, his first –very blurry- memory was standing on the edge of the quarantine, with his hands pressed against the crystal, and then licking it.

According to his dads, he was between three and four (“He was three, Simon. What are you talking about?” “He was born in November.” “It wasn’t November yet.” “We had just celebrated his birthday. He was four.” “HE WASN’T FOUR, SIMON! HE WAS THREE! THREE! We were celebrating that his quarantine had just been built!” “IT WAS THE SAME EVENT, HUGH!”) and Aunt Tamaya, plus the both of them, were in the hallway. For some reason, the fact that his eyes were so huge (they were still big. But they were bigger when he was a baby) came off as odd to Tamaya. And the moment they made eye contact, he licked the glass.

Nobody knew why. Not even himself. The adults remembered it better than he did, of course, but none of them had ever been able to guess the reasoning behind it. They often expressed Max had been a very strange baby, mostly because of his lack of social skills. It’s not like he had chosen that, and it’s not like his fathers would’ve allowed it to happen if they had had any other option. But Max wasn’t willing to stand there and pretend that he knew what he was doing, either.

Most of the time, he didn’t.

He barely held any memories of the nurses that had ever been in charge of his care, but, for obvious reasons, he remembered Dad. It was always easier to remember the person who had taken care of you the most, he supposed. And Max knew, among a lot of things, that it wasn’t his other dad’s fault. Though, sometimes, he couldn’t help but blame him.

Again, he didn’t know why, but there were those days, when he needed he the most, where a voice inside of his head told him that, if Simon loved him enough, he would just sacrifice his powers to be with him. His powers weren’t that useful for combat anyway.

“Okay, but that’s kinda mean.” Adrian told him the first time he opened up about it, the night before he attended the Trials to choose the members of his patrolling team. “Pops might not have combat powers, but they’re as important as the rest of the members’. That’s why they work so well as a team, you know? Every power can be extremely helpful during a battle, as long as you know how to use it.”

Max wasn’t doing anything in particular that day. Nothing besides listening to Adrian and sitting on the floor , at least.

“But if every power is useful…” He said, tilting his head to the side. “…Why are you allowed to reject certain aspirants?”

Adrian frowned a little, not in the sense that he looked angry at Max. Rather, he was confused by the question and was trying to word the answer in a way that sounded rational.

“Because…” He gulped and clicked his tongue. “…Like I said…uhm…the Council is an extremely good team. They’ve been doing this for a while. Us, the patrolling leaders are…allowed to reject certain prodigies because we don’t have as much experience as them. And…we might not know how to use somebody’s powers, and that’s very dangerous. We don’t want people dying, do we?”

When he said that, something clicked inside Max’s brain, and he nodded in automatic. Obviously, a few years ago, a non-prodigy teacher had taught him how to read, and the moment Adrian notified him it was his year to be in the Trials, he managed to read the manual and the rules for the event, from a booklet and a pamphlet (respectively) he had asked his dad to bring for him. He didn’t get much new information, different from the one he heard on TV or the one presented in the posters. However, amongst the rules, there was a section that talked about banned powers, which contained only two categories:

-Complete telekinesis.

-Stardust modelling.

“Yeah.” Dad told him. He was bathing him in the quarantine’s bathroom (Of course. Where else?). “Stardust catchers…which….are able to model stardust, are extremely dangerous and there’s not much research about them. Nobody really knows how they work, and it would be pretty difficult for us to… handle a prodigy like that.”

“Like me.”

Dad had always had a pretty specific routine he had to follow when bathing him. If he missed or misplaced a step, he acted like would explode or something. Also, Max didn’t understand why, but ever since he started growing thicker hair, Dad became pretty strict on the fact they should take care of it so it would grow healthy. Hence why they had a full hair routine that they did in the bathtub. That day, the statement caught him so off-guard he grabbed the wrong bottle, and then, when he realized it, he was already pouring the dense liquid (that looked more like a paste to him) on Max’s head. Cursing under his breath, he placed his other hand in the middle so it would fall over his palm, washed Max’s head and started the routine all over again, before changing the subject:

“About complete telekinesis…there’s obviously a lot of research about that power. We know how to manage with that. But telekinetic prodigies are not …very accepted in our society. They’re pointed at…Frowned upon. In the worst of cases, other prodigies hunt them down and then kill them.”

In that moment, Max came to the conclusion that all that changing the subject thing had been in vain.

Because, from his part, the answer was exactly the same:

“Like me.”

And Dad didn’t like that, for he started scratching his scalp harder, accidentally.

“No. It’s nothing like you.” He said. “You’re not like that, Max. Society hates telekinesis because some evil dude decided to use his powers, his telekinesis, for awful reasons and stained prodigy’s names. You’re not like that. You’re not abusive, or selfish or evil. And I don’t want to hear you comparing yourself to him ever again. Understood?”

To this day, that was the most aggressive form of validation someone had ever given him, but Max took it anyway, because he trusted Dad, and if he had said something like that, then there had to be a clear reason behind it.

“Understood.” He whispered.

And he tried, he really tried, to believe it. But, like many other things, no matter how hard Max tried, he was still severely confused. Not that he didn’t know about the Age of Anarchy, or the parties involved in the Age of Anarchy.

The quarantine, needless to say, could get pretty boring most of the time. Max had to do a lot of things to kill time, and some of those activities involved reading books that children shouldn’t be reading. He did read some children’s books, but then he would find himself looking through history articles and books, and reading the chapters that interested him the most. For instance, he was confident he knew about the Age of Anarchy, but one thing was knowing about it, and another, different thing, was having an opinion about in regards to it.

Max didn’t know if he had something to say about the topic. If he did, it was a very incomplete idea, and it was very likely he wouldn’t be able to phrase it correctly.

The group of people Max talked the most to were adults, and those adults, especially the ones who had experienced the Age of Anarchy and somehow managed to make it out alive, refused to talk about it. As for the few children he had talked to…

Well, about them…

Long story short, they had lives.

They all had lives outside of a glass, unlike Max. Maybe they weren’t the most interesting of lives, but at least they for sure had to be more interesting than his’. They didn’t have a pre-established schedule, where a designated person would come in to feed him or extract blood samples from his body, to then take them to the laboratory. They didn’t have to hear a total of seven alarms to remind him what he had to do: Wake up and get dressed, have breakfast and brush his teeth, enter the virtual sessions with his teachers, take a shower, have his blood samples taken, start doing his homework –if he had any- and do whatever he wanted once he was finished, have dinner, brush his teeth and go to bed, and then start all over again.

That moment, when he had spare time, would be the same one normal kids used to go out with their friends, like Adrian did. To go to the park and get themselves a scarily huge wound at the center of their knee. To live. To breathe air. To do…literally anything that wasn’t this.

Because Max was different from the many children he hadn’t yet gotten the opportunity to meet or talk to, because, obviously, they wouldn’t want to spend the whole day hanging out with a person…like him.

The only way Max could see two out of the three people in his family was through a crystal wall. And he couldn’t kiss them, he couldn’t touch them… sometimes he even wondered if he knew how their voices sounded, because, after all, Dad’s voice sounded the tiniest bit different once he crossed that infamous glass door.

He couldn’t walk through the streets of Gatlon, because, for starters, he didn’t know them. And if he dared to go out there, he would get killed on spot for having accidentally neutralized a prodigy who didn’t want to be neutralized.

Other kids had nannies whom they complained about when their parents couldn’t look after them (at least that’s the kind of things he saw on the TV shows he watched) but Max had patrol units that would move from one corner of the room to another, ready to attack anyone who came closer than necessary to him, because the only one who could take care of him in person, was Hugh.

Other kids could go out freely, without being scared of anything at all. They could get hurt while having fun with their friends and family. They could laugh until they cried with them. They could hug them, sleep in the same bed as them. They could walk their pets, go on road trips, go to amusement stores, water parks…

They could experience the current world; watch all the new events that were happening every day, in first hand.

They didn’t have to read about the past, or the people from the past to keep themselves entertained. They didn’t have the need to do that. At all.

They were living the lives Max couldn’t have, because he was too dangerous for that.

And obviously, that’s why he couldn’t just…go around asking other kids about what was their favorite bug, their favorite planet…or their opinions about Ace Anarchy, and if Pops (Simon) saying “Alec, with an A as in Abusive Swine” made them laugh.

Besides, he hadn’t even met that many kids his age. Or kids, for that matter.

He was aware Adrian wasn’t exactly a grown up, but he wasn’t a kid either, so, he usually didn’t make it into that list.

In fact, just like the banned powers in that manual, there were only two kids in Max’s list of acquaintances.

Aunt Tamaya’s first baby was born without powers, when Max was like four years old, and his dads were way too excited about it (Weird thing to brag about out loud, honestly, because all the recruits in the Headquarters were betting ridiculous amounts of money on which powers the Thunderbaby would have –Max could hear them- and one day they just heard The Dread Warden storming into the hallway, euphorically screaming “GUESS WHAT, MY LITTLE CHERUB BABY? YOUR COUSIN IS ABSOLUTELY FREAKING POWERLESS!”), for they thought Max would finally be able to have a friend who was more or less his age. Dad was the one who brought him in, two weeks after he was born. He was still tiny, red and chubby, and wrapped in his three different blankets that way, he looked like a bloated marshmallow.

Aunt Tamaya, her husband, Pops, Adrian, Aunt Kasumi and Uncle Evander were outside (as always) waiting to see what happened…and, it was extremely odd for Max to admit it, but he couldn’t remember much about that moment, even though he was already older than three. There was, however, a video taken by Uncle Evander where, if you narrowed your eyes hard enough, you could see the moment Max burst into tears right after kissing the baby’s cheek.

Neil was his friend.

At least, Max considered him to be his friend. Still, they had an age gap of four whole years, and a part of him was waiting until he was a little older so they could be on the same page. Because sometimes, when Neil couldn’t comprehend something semi-important that Max had just said, things could get pretty awkward, because there were occasions when, if Neil got too frustrated over anything, he would start crying, and his sobs often summoned his mother all the way from across the building. She never particularly tried to put the blame on Max. In fact, she hadn’t even glared at him not once, ever.

But she did choose to take him with her, into her office, or ask Adrian to babysit him while he calmed down. Afterwards, he usually didn’t come back to the quarantine.

“It’s not your fault, Max.” Pops would tell him, always. “It’s just that…Neil...he’s younger than you. There are things that might be…easy to you, but that are super complicated to him. And you might be able to do things that he can’t, and he can’t understand why he can’t, so he gets super confused and angry and that’s why he cries and Tamaya has to come and comfort him.”

“That, and because she’s like a...very freaky bird mom who hears her children cry and comes around with her super sonic enhanced sense of hea—“

“Hugh, don’t be rude.”

Every time they had that discussion in front of him, Max could never understand why Pops said Dad was being rude. He was right, to a certain extent. Aunt Tamaya was just…being a mom.

And that’s what moms did.

At least, that’s what Max had read and seen on TV because families like his’ were…super rare to find in his cartoons or favorite books. In fact, the times when he had seen himself represented in any of the things were so few that, for the longest time, Max had this weird, messed up idea that biological men could give birth. He thought that Adrian, apart from the fact that he was the closest to him, looked more similar to Simon, and that had to mean he had given birth to him, while Hugh had been the one to give birth to Max.

One year, when Max was six, they finished Lady Indomitable’s gigantic golden statue, placed downtown. It was late June, and though the city had previously looked covered in colors, that day it just looked…white and golden. That’s the best way Max could find to put it into words.

According to Max’s weather application, the heat was unbearable that day (good thing he couldn’t feel anything because the temperature in the quarantine was always regulated) yet, according to what he was seeing in one of his screens, a great percentage of the citizens of Gatlon were marching in the streets carrying floating lanterns, headed towards downtown where the event was being held.

The Council was standing in front of the covered statue. All of them except Blacklight, who had stayed to take care of the Headquarters, and Max could see him from where he was. They gave a speech about Lady Indomitable together, and as they started revealing the statue, Tsunami sang a song that was supposed to be one of Lady Indomitable’s favorite ones, and that Max was too young to recognize (he supposed). In his opinion, it was a cute event, but he would be lying if he said he wasn’t utterly confused the moment he saw Adrian taking one step ahead to be the first one to let go of his floating lantern, which was different from the other ones, because his’ was bigger, and it had a big “I”. Besides, people waited a couple of seconds until it was stable above their heads to let go of their own floating lanterns.

It still looked cute to him, but now it looked weird as well. So he got up from his chair, and walked towards the edge, pressing his hands against the glass. He hoped that would be enough to magically catch Evander’s attention, who was, at the moment, using his chair as a swing, as he typed a number in his computer, copying it from his calculator and eating from his salad every now and then. Obviously, Max’s telepathic call wasn’t enough, and he had to knock on the glass a couple of times, loudly. Even then, Uncle Evander didn’t look up in his direction.

But he did hear him, because he did respond.

“It’s not gonna work, Maximus. I’m not getting you out.”

As a side note, Max considered telling him his full name was Maximilian and not Maximus, because that was way before he realized it was a nickname. Nevertheless, he just let it pass, for the simple reason he had better things to ask. That’s why he proceeded to knock again, instead of speaking.

“What is it?”

“I wanna ask you something.”

Evander tried to steady himself in the chair without falling on his back, and once he succeeded, he came closer to the quarantine, with his arms over his hips.

“Why is Adrian doing that?” He asked, just because he wasn’t able to find another way to phrase it, while pointing at the screen behind him; Evander narrowed his eyes following his finger, as if he hadn’t been watching the event himself from a livestream on his phone. A few seconds later, he seemed to realize what he was talking about, and bit his upper lip, before pouting barely a little.

Then, he clicked his tongue.

“Because that’s his mom. And today’s her birthday.”

And it’s not that Max was insensitive enough not to recognize that it was very sad, but at the same time those single words were enough to make the idea he had of his life fall apart. All the things he thought he had already managed to understand felt fake and incorrect, and it was so fast it almost made him feel dizzy.

“She’s not his mom.” He declared.

Evander opened his eyes very widely and, next thing he knew, was that, for some reason, he looked nervous. Which, to say the least, was very…unlike Evander. He was usually super…confident, and, in Dad’s words: “He walks with his back too straight for a person who says some dumb shit every time he opens his mouth”.

At that moment, his back wasn’t straight at all, and he kept on wiping the sweat off his palms in the suit.

“…I mean…she’s not…alive anymore. But… that doesn’t mean that…”

“Noooo. I didn’t mean that.” Max cut him off. “She’s not her mom, because Adrian already has a mom.”

He stopped suddenly. Max could almost see his brain working at full speed, trying to process the data he had just received. Then, he blinked, arching his eyebrow.

“Who’s…who’s his mom?” He asked, getting closer to the crystal, and crouching down to be at Max’s height (Evander was almost too tall for his own sake). “Do Simon or Hugh…?”

“No. I mean she’s not his mom because Simon’s his mom.” Max stated, confident enough to move a mountain with his raw determination and his bare hands, which, needless to say, did nothing but make Evander even more confused.

Not that Max couldn’t understand why.

He was a brand new, redeemed person now.

But back then he wasn’t.

“…Simon is what, you said?”

“Adrian’s mom.” Max reaffirmed.

Still bewildered, Evander gawked. Perhaps he understood where that confusion was coming from but, at the same time, maybe he was too disturbed to ask for additional information. Max didn’t know which one of the two would make him feel more embarrassed, especially taking into account the next thing Evander said:

“That is the weirdest shit somebody has ever said to me, and I’ve talked to the Puppeteer an unhealthy amount of times.”

He wasn’t the one who explained to him the way his own family worked. On the contrary, he immediately told his dads about it, and next time the both of them came to talk to him, they tried to make him understand the concept of homosexual couples.

And they failed.

Miserably.

And he was using that term, because after that talk, Max went through life for a while saying that his ethnicity was Gay, because both of his dads were gay. Over and over again, they tried to correct him, but nothing seemed to work, and Max kept on spreading the information that he was gay (something he didn’t know yet) until Aunt Kasumi decided to intervene and, for his birthday, she got him a children’s book called All in Rainbow, which, according to the information in the first page, was actually a translation from a Latin American book written by two lesbians (one of them non-binary) and illustrated by the same woman who had made the Anarchists’ and the Renegades’ graphic novels and was also a Latina.

That book was something similar to a gay encyclopedia. It was narrated by this girl named Phoenix, because it followed her throughout her school and her daily life, where she came across different people and families. After every short story, there was an informative section explaining everything in regards to the new person’s identity, including their flag, the meaning of said flag, and the explanation of certain terms. Max really enjoyed it, and, in fact, he ended up going through it more than once. When he tried to persuade Adrian into reading it too, he admitted he already had, when he was younger, and proceeded to make a comment about how pretty the name “Phoenix” was.

It was only then that Max was able to understand how his own family worked, and how freaking inept he had sounded when he decided it was a great idea to use it as an ethnicity.

That book was, in fact, the cue for all the grown ups in his life to start buying books for him, which he was grateful for, except for the one that he, ironically enough, had gotten from Uncle Evander. Sure, he appreciated that he had spent money on that, but Max didn’t appreciate the fact that the plot was about a dog that was sent away to a school for dogs but made everyone believe he was in jail so he could escape. The drawings were cute, but he just couldn’t find the moral of the story and he didn’t like that.

His dads, from their part, got him a book about two frogs that, at least to Max, acted as if they were a couple; Aunt Tamaya was the one of the short books without drawings.

As for Aunt Kasumi…she usually brought a lot of educational books; every time she overheard him expressing something that was making him confused, she brought him a book about it, including that time she heard him asking Ruby Tucker “So, are you always bleeding?” completely out of context.

Max supposed that it had a lot to do with the fact that Aunt Kasumi was in charge of Child Services, and she spent a lot of time with children, especially because she liked to volunteer in orphanages, having been in one herself when she was a little girl. She usually moved in prodigy orphanages, for she was one to know the poor conditions they sometimes presented.

And…to say the least, she wasn’t a woman of many words. She was very reserved with everything she did. And, besides, it was none of Max’s business. After all, he was just a kid.

But, in this case, it kind of involved him.

Kind of.

For the simple reason that there were two names in the list of people his age Max had talked to. The first one was Neil (who wasn’t even his age. He was just close to that) and the second one…

The second one involved Aunt Kasumi.

Just like people were able to overhear his conversations through the quarantine, Max was able to overhear the conversations they were having on the outside, especially when he was trying to do it on purpose.

Every time he was too bored, in other words.

Some of the things older people said were confusing, but, over time, Max had learned to store that information, so he could comprehend it better in the future. He didn’t know at what level that was healthy, yet he still did it because, literally, he didn’t have anything better to do.

During extremely busy days, the Council chose to spend the night in the Headquarters, just in case, and while they could sleep in the common room, if Pops was too insistent on wanting to be close to the quarantine, they slept in the hallway.

In Max’s hallway.

Of course, Dad would sleep with him inside the quarantine but, in order to make it feel more like a pajama party, they slept close to the edge of the “room” (if it could be called that way), so close to the Councils’ inflatable beds, they could’ve touched them if there hadn’t been a wall in between.

When they were sleeping in that hallway, there wasn’t a patrol looking over Max, because they were the patrol and, every two hours, they changed turns to stay awake. All of them except Dad, who stayed the entire night with Max. The others often got up and started walking around the quarantine according to their ages. That is, Aunt Tamaya went first, followed by Pops, then Aunt Kasumi, and Uncle Evander at the end. However, since it wasn’t like they were too used to having many hours of sleep, Kasumi and Evander usually got up at the same time and patrolled together.

That night, Max was having trouble sleeping. Dad was hugging him, which made him feel very comfortable, but, at the same time, before he wrapped his arms around him, he had been moving way too much, and that had made Max feel uneasy, because a part of him, though he knew it was highly possible it wasn’t true, was feeding the annoying worm at the back of his brain that told him he was the one making Dad uneasy. That Dad was moving and couldn’t sleep because he didn’t want to be anywhere near him. Perhaps he would’ve preferred to be with Pops. Perhaps he would’ve preferred to be with Adrian, even. Anyone but Max.

Which, again, he knew things…weren’t like that. But that little, nameless, uninvited worm was always telling him that, over and over again, determined to repeat those awful words until they made so much noise they made him cry.

And even then, when he was already crying, the worm ate deeper into his brain and told him to stop because, in the end, who was he crying for anyway?

Who was he crying for, if nobody was here to see or hear him?

That night, of course, he didn’t cry, for the simple reason that…well, he did have somebody who would hear him cry, and maybe comfort him like Aunt Tamaya comforted Neil when he was crying…

But he didn’t want Dad to do that.

Not today.

Not because he were mad at him, but because he feared that, if he did, then Dad would be the one who would get mad.

Besides, that night he got extremely busy trying to overhear the conversation between Kasumi and Evander who, the moment they got up, started talking as they walked, first at a volume so low their voices could’ve been considered murmurs, but then, with every second, the issue started escalating.

And it wasn’t that they were arguing, it was that they weren’t exactly happy with each other, nor did they seem to manage to get to a mutual agreement.

Max felt like that time he was watching a movie with his earphones on, and instead of paying attention to the plot, he kept trying to identify which sounds were dominant in his left ear, and which ones were dominant in his right ear, because Uncle Evander and Aunt Kasumi were walking around the quarantine, and the echoes of their voices were floating right behind them, making it almost impossible for Max to decipher their messages word by word.

At least, until they stopped in front of him. That is, very close to the inflatable mattresses, too. And with just one eye open, he was able to tell Aunt Kasumi wasn’t amused, with her arms so tight across her chest that way, and with Uncle Evander standing more straight than necessary (because, yes, Dad was right about that...sometimes... because Max had read somewhere that tall people had to be really careful with their posture to avoid spine deformities or have less complications when they were older) waving his –as Aunt Tamaya would’ve called them- Hot Cheeto fingers right in front of her face, in a way so aggressive she sometimes had to lean backwards not to get one of her eyes poked out.

“…and it won’t look good for the organization. It won’t look good, Kasumi. You know why?”

“Yes, Vandy. I know why. I already knew before, yet you took the time to explain it to me another seven times. I mean, thank you, I guess, but—“

“If I kept on explaining it to you, it’s because I didn’t…and I don’t know what’s not clicking.”

“What do you mean with what’s not clicking?” And she tilted her head to the side. “…Are you still talking to me?”

“Don’t play dumb, Kasumi. Especially not in front of me, because I know you.”

“Right. But I still don’t get what you’re referring to. What’s not clicking about what, exactly?”

Evander laughed in a way Max would’ve just…understood if she had decided to punch him in the face so he would stop.

“We’re a big organization, Kasumi. People talk.”

“Of course that people talk. I mean, our citizens support our cause and our government system. In fact, statistically, more than half of the population do, but sometimes there are things that… are for their own good but they will refuse to understand and accept them anyway. And that’s normal. We might be the law, but we can’t control how the masses think, you know?”

“For their own good, you say. Beneficial.”

“Exactly.”

“Beneficial for who, if you’d be so kind?” Evander laughed again. “As far as I understand, we’re talking about one single problem, from a single person. It won’t bring anything beneficial, as you call it, for our organization, or for our system…if anything, it will damage it and make us lose credibility.”

“…Why?”

As a response, he started flapping his arms around, as if he were trying to point at something invisible. Or at something that wasn’t really there.

And this time, Aunt Kasumi didn’t try to pretend she was seeing it, and remained silent until Evander realized he would have to make himself understood.

“Because…” He clenched his fists, sighing loudly, almost like he was certain he was right and Aunt Kasumi wasn’t. “Our policy. Remember that? You know, a thing that actually exists and you helped write?”

She didn’t respond.

“Our policy as Renegades, it’s that we shall keep our people safe, and that includes prodigy and non-prodigy citizens. We shall preserve their lives no matter the cost, and create a safe environment where all can coexist and protect each other. That means that no prodigy individual with questionable reasons is to be allowed to cross that gate and disturb the peace or, worse, put somebody’s life at risk.”

“I’m aware of that.”

“Yes, you should be, because we wrote it, for fuck’s sake.”

“Evander, please. There’s no need to curse or—“

“…But you know what that means? It means that we can’t just…go against that policy and expect our citizens, our recruits, even, to still take us seriously.”

“Oh, but I’m following that policy because, as you might remember, we also pledged to assist anyone whose life was at risk, and people who, day by day, have to live under very vulnerable circumstances. It is our job to intervene and take them to a safer place, where their quality of life can improve, isn’t it?”

“It is, but that applies for people who aren’t dangerous to society.”

At that point, Max had both his eyes open, and he was seeing the scene more clearly.

In fact, everything was so clear, that he was able to read the confusion in Aunt Kasumi’s expression, even before she said:

“…This is a kid we’re talking about.”

“She is dangerous.”

“She’s not dangerous, Evander. She's a kid. Sure, her behavior has caused her to go bouncing from orphanage to orphanage like a rubber ball but that doesn’t mean she shouldn’t be helped, that doesn’t mean we should just turn our backs at her, and that doesn’t mean she’s dangerous.”

“You know damn well her behavior’s not what I’m talking about.”

“Well, I am, because that’s the only thing that should concern us at the moment.”

“No, it’s not?”

“It is. Because she’s a kid…and, honestly, Vandy…” Aunt Kasumi sighed. “… I know we were raised thinking life is war, but… the truth is, people are not born evil. Or dangerous, for that matter. Take your time and think about it, and you can talk to me again once you’ve calmed down, because you must be pretty much aware I don't appreciate this tone. Besides, it’s not like this little argument is going to stop me anyway.” She shrugged.

“…after all, I already talked to Hugh.”

“…And what did he say?”

“It’s not my place to tell you that. Ask him.”

Max never knew whether he had taken that suggestion or not but, knowing Evander, he just assumed he hadn’t. And, to be honest, he never asked Dad about it either. He just stood and watched how everything proceeded to go down and chaos unleashed.

Though, he had to admit, unlike what had happened with other “big” events, this one specific chaos was rather discrete. A kind of well-kept secret.

In fact, the only explicit hint that something would happen in the next few days, was the little disturbance caused by Team Frostbite (it was always Team Frostbite. Max had no idea why everyone was so…willing to put up with their…issues so much, and without hesitation) when it was their turn to patrol around the quarantine and Evander came around, holding his notepad, and muttered something to them.

“Whom?!” Genissa Clark, Frostbite, snapped immediately.

Evander frowned and, judging by the way his moustache moved, he also pouted, before turning at Mack Baxter, Aftershock, to start talking to him instead.

“Do you have any idea of what she’s talking about?” He clicked his tongue. “Like…okay, nevermind…”

When Max looked up, he saw the exact moment when Evander realized he was listening to the conversation, so he lowered his tone once again. Yet, Max was still able to see the million ways in which Genissa Clark's face contorted and, in the end, the first second Evander shut his mouth, she declared:

“We’re not available for that. Perhaps that task should be assigned to Team Sketch or Team Peregrine. They’re always lollygagging around, it’s about time they get some real responsibi—“

“That’s a no, then. Alright. Thanks for your cooperation, Team Frostbite. Or, lack of, more likely. Do better next time, okay?”

If Max wanted to be honest with himself, it hadn’t taken him much time to realize he wasn’t fond of any of the members in Team Frostbite. Or Frostbite herself. In fact, he considered her to be almost insufferable, and, again, he couldn’t quite understand why they were allowed to boss everybody around. To a certain extent, they reminded him of the popular kids (who were also bullies) in every movie he had ever watched. They weren’t nice. Not even likeable.

Maybe Max was just very specific on the type of people he liked.

Or maybe he liked everyone and their mom, except Team Frostbite, because he didn’t know any better than that, while at the same time he knew better than liking Team Frostbite.

But he didn’t know better than liking Margaret White, because…well…

She hadn’t done anything particularly awful for him to have an opinion as strong as Uncle Evander’s about her.

She came on a Friday.

Not that she exclusively came to talk to him.

She, in fact, arrived alongside Aunt Kasumi, who was wearing her civilian clothes –High-waisted jeans and a baby blue shirt, damp with sweat because it was hot outside- and kept leaving her car key on every table that came across her, before coming back to it to grab them.

At first, Max wasn’t able to see Margaret very well, mostly because he was distracted with his online classes, and she was taken straight to Dad’s office, along with Adrian’s entire team. And though Max didn’t see much, he was able to catch a glimpse on how Adrian kept on trying to grab her hand, and she insisted on pulling away.

At some point, he had read about that too.

The Renegades accepted recruits from ages 14 and up, talking about patrolling. However, they had a child protection program, where, basically, they assisted orphan prodigy children with behavioral issues or, though only few people liked to admit it, potential to be a part of the organization when they were older. Adrian didn’t like it and, strangely enough, out of everyone, Evander didn’t like it either. Nevertheless, Evander was one to get more aggressive when it came to child recruitment, which, thankfully, wasn’t common at all.

In fact, those cases were so rare, that they referred to them as “exceptions”. After all, children were not allowed into the Trials. As far as Max knew, they weren’t placed in patrol units. On the contrary, they were given small positions in the organization, and their paychecks were directed to their respective savings account, something that Pops was in charge of. However, they could use that money for their personal needs or something they wanted to buy, as the few children recruits resided in orphanages around Gatlon and went back there after their shift was over. Max supposed that sometimes their caretakers refused to buy them something because it wasn’t good for their health and it must be very satisfying to tell them it was their money (That’s what Adrian always did when Dad refused to buy something for him).

(That, or he went and asked Pops for that same thing).

Usually, they could have cash withdrawals just by presenting their Renegade Recruit ID because, obviously, they didn’t have an official ID yet.

And not only that. The children recruits were assigned a patrol unit with older members to look after them, or help them with anything they needed. Taking into account the conversation he had overheard, he supposed that duty had fallen on Adrian’s team (A theory that was later confirmed to be true by Adrian himself).

They were never left unsupervised, just like Max.

The day Margaret arrived, for a couple of minutes, maybe hours, Max was submerged in his own little world, and in the assignment his last teacher had told him to do. It was just him, his colored pencils, his paper sheets, his notes, his head, his hands, and the miniature planet Earth that his quarantine supposed, against the real world that he had never stepped on.

But every now and then, a little piece of the unknown, mysterious real world came running to his encounter and talked to him, sometimes in the most sudden, unsolicited way.

Sometimes it was Dad opening the door without calling. Sometimes it was Adrian pressing a new drawing against the crystal. Sometimes it was Pops, making a little “Psst” sound to get his attention.

Sometimes it was three little knocks, and the girl that was producing them with her knuckles.

Back then, Margaret’s hair was longer, to the point where she could tie it in a high ponytail, decorated with a blue bow, which combined with his orphanage uniform: A white polo, with the institution’s symbol by the right side of her chest, beneath a cobalt blue skirt with suspenders, long white socks and black scholar shoes.

He saw her and recognized she was real the first time, but Max still gave himself a couple of seconds to grasp the fact that she was really there.

Well, not there-there.

That she was there, as in, through the glass.

And she was calling him, even if she wasn’t saying anything. In fact, she was just there, eating from a chocolate bar with puffed rice. Her free hand was still over the glass.

And she was waiting.

So, he figured he didn’t want to keep her waiting anymore, and leaving his task and his tools behind, Max walked in her direction. And like it always happened, he stopped right before bumping his forehead against the hard, translucent surface.

Margaret took another bite from her chocolate, with an arched eyebrow, but she said nothing. From afar, Max hadn’t been able to really appreciate her features, but now that he was closer, he realized she was taller than him; her small, brown eyes were making her lashes look bigger; her black hair looked thicker and he was able to conclude that her skin tone was more or less like Pops’, maybe a little darker. She had a mark over her cheek, and at first Max thought it was a mole or a birthmark…until, of course, he realized that moles weren’t (or, at least, shouldn’t be) purple, and realized it was a bruise.

He didn’t ask her about it. Adrian had once told him that there were people who might not want to talk about their bruises or open wounds, not because the stories behind them were painful to tell, but because they were too embarrassing and telling embarrassing stories was an inconvenience.

“…well… now that I think about it…” He said right after. “…That’s not it. No. Not really. Sometimes your wounds’ backstories are painful. Or sometimes…you just want to keep them a secret, you know? And secrets are…sort of important.”

He believed every word.

Hence why, instead of saying something too nosy about that bruise, a little slowly at first, Max started lifting his hand up, until he reached the spot where Margaret’s was, and pressed his palm there. When she stared at his palm in confusion, Max clarified:

“Hugh five. You know?" Max giggled a little." As in… the Captain? Hugh? ...No?"

She didn’t laugh. And that was odd because Adrian would’ve.

Margaret wasn’t Adrian, sadly. And, it seemed to be, she hadn’t had an older sibling to tell her that some things just…weren’t adequate as icebreakers to start a conversation. Because, like Adrian had said, there were certain things other people might not want to talk about.

“Are you sick?” She directly asked.

Max was still “pressing” his hand against hers.

Gulping hard, he felt his throat boiling hot, almost as if it were growing blisters.

“No.” He said in a hoarse voice. “Why?”

Not pulling away either, Margaret said:

“The other day, Sister Malinda brought a very tiny baby into the orphanage. They were so small they had to take them to the medical wing.” She took another bite from her chocolate, and kept on speaking with her mouth full. “I sneaked out of my room to see them, and they were inside this little glass box that helped keeping them alive. Sister Tam told me so.”

Max kept quiet for a while. He would’ve been lying if he said he didn’t have a little curiosity about the name, but Margaret solved everything that had to be solved even if he didn’t ask her to.

“Sister Tam was named after Thunderbird. She’s younger than the other nuns.”

He guessed so.

Aunt Tamaya’s real name had been revealed to the general public on the 13th year into the Age of Anarchy, when she reappeared after being away for months thanks to an accident that involved Queen Bee and a cliff or something like that (Max couldn’t quite understand it, and Aunt Tamaya couldn’t remember much about it either. If she did, then she just didn’t desire to talk about it). It wasn’t a fun anecdote or anything like that but, according to his dads, the name Tamaya topped the lists for the most female-assigned names for at least a year, and the same thing happened in the 20th year into the Age of Anarchy...however, by the time she was buried, the world didn’t know Lady Indomitable’s real name, and for an entire month, people used Regina instead of Georgia. When Max asked why, Dad answered that, when attending public events, Lady Indomitable used to wear a pair of shiny golden R-shaped earrings that caused everybody in Gatlon to develop mass hysteria and made themselves believe that those Rs meant Regina, when in reality, according to Lady Indomitable herself, one of them meant “Rawles”, and the other “Renegade”. In fact, Oscar Silva (Smokescreen, one of the members of Adrian’s team) had once said that one of his cousins, who lived in Mexico, had been named Renata Regina (Though nobody knew what the heck that first name was, and Oscar had a really peculiar way to pronounce Regina) because she was born a few days after Lady Indomitable’s decease.

“I knew that.” Max lied.

“Sure, buddy. I bet you did.” Margaret chuckled. And there, Max realized she thought she was too clever.

Which, he didn’t doubt she was. He wasn’t in the position to state that. At least, not yet.

But what he was in the position to state, was that, if she thought herself to be clever, then it was his opportunity to think of himself as clever too. After all, he had been reading his whole life because he didn’t have anything else to do.

If Margaret was clever, then so was he.

“You’re talking about an incubator.” He said.

Margaret looked up out of a sudden (Max hoped she hadn’t gotten dizzy). He could still see the chocolate, that at this point should’ve been mush, stored in the inside of her right cheek.

“Uh?” She asked, struggling to keep her mouth closed.

Max gulped, and tapped the surface with his fingers.

“The thing where they put the little baby. It’s called an incubator. That’s where they put pre-term babies, because they’re not ready to survive outside of their mother’s womb. Sometimes their lungs don’t work on their own, sometimes their hearts are too fast or too slow…”

“You look too old to be a baby.” She observed. “Are your powers something related to that? Like, are you a baby who doesn’t look like a baby?”

For a second, Max thought about quoting Evander that time he had boldly stated that Simon was Adrian’s mom, but he didn’t because he wasn’t in the mood to curse.

“…No. First, this is not an incubator. And second, I’m a kid.” He answered. “I’m not a baby.”

“Then why are you here?”

The short answer was that, honestly, that was none of her business. And the even shorter answer, was:

“I can’t tell you. It’s a secret. And secrets are sort of important.”

“A secret.” She repeated, as if tasting the word. “…You don’t look like you want to be here. Are you allowed to come out?”

The short answer was still that it was none of her business. But, if he wanted to be honest, for some reason, he didn’t want to give that answer. Because, to be fair, she would find out on her own sooner or later. Because, yes, people talked, and while his dads were kind of secretive about him, everyone in the headquarters knew him. Her being clueless was just a temporary event that would vanish into thin air in a blink.

And, for some reason, he wanted to enjoy it while it lasted.

Maybe tell her something that wasn’t real. Maybe… tell her something that wasn’t necessarily true but that he wanted it to be. Maybe something that was more interesting than what he was, in reality; maybe something that would make the worm in his brain go away for two weeks.

"I can't get out." He finally decided. "Because this glass is infrangible."

Then, he knocked on it three times.

"See?"

Margaret tilted her hair to the side, looking like a cat.

"What does that word mean?"

And dumb as it sounded, Max felt a twinge in his stomach along with a violent wave of pride. Because, even if it was hard for him to admit it, he was hoping she would ask that.

He wanted her to ask that.

"It means you can't break it."

Margaret's eyes seemed bigger. But just as she was separating her lips to speak, somebody behind her cleared their throat.

That's when Max spotted Aunt Kasumi leaned against a wall with her arms crossed. When Margaret looked over her shoulder, she found her there too. But while Max waved at her, Margaret remained inexpressive.

"You're very far from the restroom, Maggie." Kasumi said, in a serious tone. Afterwards, she massaged her temples.

"Please, darling. Just… help me here, okay? We have to go back to the office."

And she didn't seem mad, but rather disappointed.

When it came to Aunt Kasumi, that was enough. Max knew that, and Margaret knew that too. That's why they both removed their hands from the glass, and Margaret started going away.

However, before she was too far, Max asked:

"Why are you here?"

And Margaret turned around, smiling.

"If you're not telling me, I'm not telling you." She sentenced. Then, she proceeded to imitate his voice as she said:

"It's a secret."

And for a while, obviously, it remained that way. A secret. But it wasn't long before they both knew everything they needed to know.

Margaret was integrated into the janitorial team, but, for a while, people talked about her and her powers, and Max couldn’t help but remember what Dad had told him in the bathtub, and the conversation between Evander and Kasumi.

Yet, more than scared, Max felt… something he didn't know what it was. In fact, he wasn't scared of her. More likely, a part of him felt that he knew what it was like to be her, because maybe they weren't that different after all.

People were scared of them both.

But he wasn't scared of her. No, not really.

He hoped she wasn’t scared of him either.

Maybe they could've been very good friends, even through the infrangible glass that kept him from getting pointed at, frowned upon or killed.

#renegades trilogy #marissa meyer #Dawnie writes #renegades ship week #margaret white #magpie #max everthart-westwood #the bandit

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violet-t-9 · 4 years ago

Text

Check in on my (not very realistic) wish list for episode 136

1. The M9 eventually find a way to catch up with Lucien and Cree (or even get in front of them) before they are able to go to the astral sea AND at least start the combat please and thanks (Bonus: Cree gets a wild magic effect that gives M9 some advantage or laughs).

OH NO an intuit charge they were ambushed! The TT were way ahead of them... They caught up though! Lucian and Cree are still there... oops never mind they got ahead AGAIN, no TT combat today. Well, astral sea here we come!

2. Caleb and Beau’s eyes come into play at some point but are helpful to them instead of being used against them (look, let me try to be optimistic).

They have true sight! They can communicate telepathically to ANYONE! Hey, at least they gained some magical abilities and SOME sort of profit from all that anxiety. The eyes were still used against them to sense their presence.

3. Some long one-on-one conversations between any characters please, I need the RP experience! Any two of them would have a great dynamic.

Welp, I mean, combat time! Combat is also good, who needs RP anyways :(

4. More wild magic effects from casting in Aeor! Jester, Essek, Caduceus, Veth I’m looking at y’all. Caleb and Fjord already had their fun, but I won’t say no to more. (Bonus: the effects are harmless and fun ones like how they have been).

Oh no Veth... Is tiny... At least it didn’t cost any hit points? CALEB IS A SHEEP THAT WALKED INTO THE PORTAL LMAO. That was one of the wild magic effects that I wanted to see the most and it was as funny as possible.

5. Even more Aeorian ruin exploration and finding clues that may help them with the city business, but no more side combats before getting to the TT.

Caleb rolled 31 arcana on the runic circle wow transmutation + dunamancy! Temporal alteration! 31 on investigation too wow Caleb, “primal artifact”? TIME TRAVEL?? So that’s why it’s called the Temporal Dock! Also, wow, they actually did not enter any other side combats before TT, using stealth and magic. They were forced into a side combat after getting to them though.

6. Beau and Yasha continue with their PDA AND have a private moment together (let’s hope for both, because why not).

“Yasha your hair looks really great” lol Beau is not wasting any time is she. Yasha’s defensive “she’s wonderful” was ooc but cute lol. “Anything for my princess” lmao stop you guys. No private moment, but close enough.

7. Jester and Fjord heal each other at some point OR have more physical contact (they were so cute last episode).

Jester healed Fjord! I’m sad it had to happen but it was a good heal too. Jester also picked up the paralyzed Fjord after the intuit charges!

8. Continuing to hope for Essek’s fancy dunamantic spells OR magical items (I felt Caleb so hard last episode, I too am attracted to power and skills).

Purple sparkling dunamancy fly wings oh YEAH. Thanks for maintaining concentration on Cad you beautiful war caster you.

9. Veth and Fjord diss each other at some point OR exhibit support for each other, I love their love-hate relationship.

“Fjord can shape water... yes you can, you got it” lol Also the discussion about Veth preparing featherfall and Fjord’s “yes thank you Veth”. The “marine layer” argument lol - sounded both supportive and like a diss.

10. Continuing to hope for Caleb to polymorph into anything really, or using polymorph on any party member (polymorph! Caleb interactions my beloved, this is just going to be a permanent feature on my wish list now).

Intelligence 2 SHEEPLEB MY BELOVED BWAHAHAHAHAH I love this so much. It’s not exactly polymorph, but he is a sheep guys, that counts.

11. Mention of Davexian/Charlie at some point in time (bonus: Veth does it).

Lmao Beau mentioned Davexian right away, and Veth gave a reaction right away. I did not expect a mention so soon but here we are.

12. Jester continuing to be the braincell holder of the team and keeps everybody on task (go queen I love you).

YEAH go get that natural 20 Jester! Keep track of what floor it is! She also urges them to keep moving.

13. Essek and Caleb have more of their deep wizard conversations and interactions OR be impressed by each other at some point (Bonus: another party member mentions/addresses whatever they’ve got going on).

YES wow the temporal dock scene. Also Jester thanks for the mention lol. “It’s complicated” sounds about right.

14. Cad attempting to speak with the dead on the remaining TT members (there are still Otis and Zoran) and learning some useful information.

Well... it’s kind of too late for that.

15. Jester sees Artagan again and we finally find out what Caleb was seeing during that commune and that scry (I need answers please! Don’t try to distract me with everything else going on, I won’t fall for it).

IT WAS TRUE SIGHT? It was true sight and Beau was just not close enough! Sprinkle whispering in Jester’s ear?? Someone’s theory I saw here was true good for you! Arty has been sprinkle all along that’s why sprinkle is alive.

16. More discussion about dunamancy in Aeor and the Luxon (I’d love to know how Essek is feeling about their discovery and get his thoughts on it).

Well... time travel magic circles are certainly dunamancy. Essek is as excited as you would expect him to be - very.

17. A successful divine intervention from either cleric! (Bonus: that allows them to stop the TT)

Nope, but it may happen next week? Maybe?

18. Heroes’ feast and we learn more about the food/drink preferences or other fun facts from everybody (Bonus: great roll on the HP boon from the feast).

Welp well they ain’t gonna get that one extra hour.

19. I know they are not gonna see the tower but I still kinda want to see Essek’s room look it’s going to stay on this wish list until it happens.

Yeah I mean I didn’t really expect this to come true any time soon.

20. Somebody pushes a red button, again (Bonus: it’s someone we don’t expect to push the button).

I mean, Beau went underwater to grab the magical potions, that was kinda button-pushing, but it’s to be expected. She is an expositor! She investigates!

21. Cad continuing to be a MVP in combat as always OR have an amazing non-combat idea/discovery.

Cad got Yasha up as soon as she was down! ALSO that shield of retribution force damage was AWESOME. The invisibility was so smart!

22. You know the drill by now - everyone remains relatively happy and alive by the end of the episode except Lucien and Cree (they can perish), and the episode ends on a terrifying cliffhanger as always (Bonus: they end up in the Astral Sea and that’s where we finish the episode).

Wow that bonus part is a PERFECT PREDICTION if I do say so myself. I knew that getting into the Astral Sea would be a good cliffhanger. I’m figuring it out guys.

Seriously though please stay safe and alive M9 (and yes Essek is included) that’s all I want.

Nobody has been dead so far, so I’m as happy as I can be!

Score: 16/22

Other highlights:

Their exploration last episode paid off with the teal keycard! I knew it even distractions can be helpful!

Essek rolled a 30! On stealth! WOO his first great roll probably, Matt sounded so proud of him too. Also that clutch war caster concentration save too, he is finally rolling better (well, slightly).

Caleb’s decisive wall of force and two correct-level dispel magic saved everybody twice, competent as always. I love him so much (also, sheepleb my beloved).

NICE SAVE VETH THANK YOU omg what a queen with the mage hand, truly a 2000 IQ move made by a genius. Jester is safe I’m so happy!!

Wow, what an episode! As always, CR cast gave me such a wonderful night of tension, humour, action and intrigue. I am so happy and thankful that I get to witness this story unfold! I cannot wait for next Thursday, already. I am nervous about their astral sea journey, but I trust in the cast and they will always deliver a great story.

(Plus, maybe they can actually save Yussa now, pretty please?) :D

#cr spoilers #critical role spoilers #critical role #c2e136 #cr liveblog #the mighty nein #campaign 2 #manifest list

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fluffomatic · 4 years ago

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Hewwo, could you tell us more about Dr. Cackle, please? They look like a very interesting character!

Yooo this took forever to write out lmao. But thank u! I'm glad ur interested in them! Can't wait to draw more of them! (And eventually design their assistant whoops 😅)

Here we go! Also I looked up a template for this cause I needed a guide, if you're interested here it is!

First name: Alban

Surname: Cackle

Age: 23

Gender: Agender

Sexuality: Asexual Aromantic

Current residence: On the Tickle Island

Relationship status: Single (they care more for their research than forming a strong relationship with someone)

Physical Appearence

Height: 6'3"

Weight: 173 lbs

Eye colour: Brown

Hair colour: Blonde (they dyed it tho they're a brunette)

Personality

Likes: Tickling, science, being inside, alone time, traveling, adventure, seen as intelligent, their pet Buzzli, plants, bugs and animals

Dislikes: being seen as an idiot, arguments, large crowds, being over powered, people touching their hair, people calling them "sir", messes

Education: College Graduate

Fears: Large Crowds, Germs, Needles

Personal goals: To continue to expand the tickle island

General attitude: Reclusive and overly confident in themself. Sees themself as too powerful to overtake. If they feel like they're losing, in an argument, battle, etc, they will get angry and release one of their creations on the other.

Health

Illnesses : Diabetes Type 2

Sleeping habits: Poor, they tend to overwork themself. Sees their research as more important

Energy level: Low until they've had their coffee. Than it's average

Eating habits: Poor, again focuses too much on work and forgets to eat. Their assistant will sometimes bring them snacks if they haven't eaten in awhile

Memory: Excellent, will remember notes they took weeks ago

Any unhealthy habits: other than their poor sleeping and eating habits and the constant over working, they tend to strive for perfection and anything less than that is out of the question. They will do anything to make sure their experiments turn out perfectly, even if they have to sacrifice their body or anothers to do that.

History

Childhood: They had a fairly normal childhood, two great parents that loved them more than life. They were amazing in school and loved doing the work, sometimes they'd ask the teacher for more work cause they got bored quickly. They were tickled often as a child, their parents noticed they liked it, considering they told them, so they practically tickled Alban everyday. When they got a little older they started to tickle their parents back. They had the most relentless tickle fights.

Teen years: This is when they started questioning their gender. They felt uncomfortable being raised as a boy and they knew it wasn't who they were. They talked to their parents about how they were feeling and they started doing research right away. That's when they came out as Agender. Albans school life wasn't the best due to some bullying, being the schools "smart kid" they had a target on their back, however they took the bullying head on. Their confidence in themself overshadowed any negativity thrown their way. They're love for tickling only grew as they aged. They made a small group of friends and they dubbed Alban the "Tickle Monster". They constantly started tickle fights and they usually won. Luckily their friends were really sweet when they opened up and told them about their love for tickling. However the news somehow got around the school and that added to the bullying. They were embarrassed but kept their composure. They kept their tickling to a minimum afterwards.

Adult years: When Alban went to college for science they learned so much, too much some might say. In the end of their time at school they had figured out how to modify plants, on a small scale. Nothing crazy, but it planted a seed in their brain. After they graduated they started researching more at a small lab in their hometown. They learned more about modifying plants and even was able to modify their first bug, just a grub, they managed to modify the grubs body to be able to grow soft fur. This only heightend their interest. Their work got out and many science corporations contacted them for a higher paying job. One in particular peeked their interest. In the email they received from this place who were part of the government they offered them their own private island with a lab to do whatever they please with it, in return they must share their findings with them. They took the offer right away. When they got there they weren't sure what they were gonna do at first, but then they ran into Motherbloom. The huge flower asked why Alban was there and they told her, than asked what she was. Instead of telling them she decided to show them. That's when she pinned them down and wreaked them with tickles. After 10 minutes she let them up and Alban wanted in right away. They did some experiments on her and her flowers and discovered she held a potent "tickle pollen" they then used this pollen to start modifying the creatures on the island, not already changed by insects spreading it to themselves and other plants. At this point Alban developed kind of a "God complex". They felt they could do anything. As years went by they created the tickle forest. They don't know what the government is using their research for but they know that they want more of it, considering they're still paying them.

Relationships

Parents: Mother, Harriet Cackle/Father, Roger Cackle

Siblings: 1 brother, Billy Cackle

Friends: their assistant but barely

Others

Occupation: full time scientist at their own lab

Current home: the labs on tickle island

Favourite types of food: Spicy or Fried

Favourite types of drink: Just water, sometimes flavored

Guilty pleasures: Tickling, duh

Pet peeves: Small distracting noises like loud chewing or tapping

Pets: Buzzli the tickle bee

Talents: superior intelligence, cunning and can outsmart people easily

Favourite colours: pink

Favourite type of music: soft indie

If you have anything else specifically you wanna know go ahead and ask! :D

#dr. cackle #alban cackle #about oc #they've been a ler all their life #kinda a mad scientist low key #thanks for the ask!#answered ask #tickle ask

51 notes · View notes

irwinkitten · 5 years ago

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quarantine and chill | poly!lashton

notes: so as some of you may know, i got hit with covid-19. i’d kept socials updated with my symptoms and how i was dealing with it but i’ve been quite on the aftermath of what i went through. so i did what i do best, i wrote. similar with teulu, i decided to write it out in the form of a fic. a lot of what happens is what i’ve had to struggle through with regards to recovery and what i’m still struggling with. there is a lot that i haven’t really talked about with it either, however i got the main points down and just wrote. if i was feeling better, i’d probably have shifted it to an oc but this felt much too personal to do. i was debating on whether or not this was going to be posted. at first i wasn’t, then i wasn’t sure. i finally decided to because i enjoy writing and i enjoy giving people something to read, something to enjoy. i also decided on poly!lashton mostly because of the interview on one of the instagram lives where ash said he cooks and i think it was with @sexgodashton where were talking about how ashton would mother hen you when you’re sick lmao and then i got daydreamy because i’ve been dealing with the whole situation alone and it’s difficult when your loved ones (both friends and family) are too far away and unable to be with you. i’m rambling at this point but yeah, tldr; this is really personal on how i recovered from that godforsaken virus. warnings: talks of dying, depression, sickness word count: 9k (oops)

donate to my ko-fi here

When you’d come home from closing up the store, it had been an almost nightmarish day for you. It felt surreal that the store was closing until further notice and you had no idea when you were going to even be back in your job again.

What frustrated you was the fact that you hadn’t been able to book a flight out to LA before the travel bans kicked in, leaving you to be self-isolating in your apartment for the duration of the lockdown, alone.

Luke and Ashton had both voiced their complaints, but no amount of money being thrown at the problem wasn’t getting you back to LA with them.

“How are you feeling?” Ashton asked over facetime whilst you tidied up. The simplicity of living in communal housing meant that you only had two rooms to tidy and keep clean. Luke and Ashton loved it for the fact that it afforded the three of you some privacy away from prying eyes of the media because you were tight-lipped about where you lived.

“Tired. I’ve cried a lot and I’m missing the both of you.” You admitted quietly as Luke popped into the screen, his head resting on Ashton’s shoulder. His lips wore a tired smile, one that you could match.

“We’re missing you too, love.” Luke’s voice was comforting. You finally settled down on the couch, your body sinking into the cushions and sighed.

“You know you don’t have to worry right? Ash and I are gonna help you.” The reassurance from Luke made your lips twitch up.

“I know. I’m just frustrated. They should have made this decision well over a week ago.”

Neither of them could say much against that. You’d told the company bosses that you were at risk, you’d warned them that the store wouldn’t pull in enough money to warrant staying open for the week.

But they’d simply said that they were following government guidelines. It had been nothing but frustration for the three of you.

“Are you both home finally?” Your question was much quieter and Ashton grimaced.

“Because I have a cough, they’ve organised us to be quarantined since we’re together. They’ve done the tests but I don’t think it’s anything, I think it’s just allergies playing up since I’ve been sneezing non stop.” Ashton explained and you sighed.

“Irony at its finest.” You received sad smiles in return from your boys.

“I’ve got some last minute paperwork to finish up and send off since I couldn’t do so at the shop. How about I call you both tomorrow?” Luke pouted and you giggled at the expression, your heart lifting that little bit.

“Fine but next time I’m hogging the phone.” Luke muttered and you laughed before blowing them both a kiss.

“Love you both, I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

The paperwork was easy to finish off and left you a few hours to shower and change whilst tidying up around.

When you crawled into bed, you checked your phone to see a photo of the two of them snuggled up together, Ashton practically smothering Luke. You sent them one back of you with the bear they’d gotten you, sprayed in their cologne.

When you woke up the next day, there was only a slight difference, your blocked nose making you groan.

“Fucking allergies.” Was muttered as you made your way to the bathroom, waving to one of your neighbours who was just leaving the kitchen.

You’d decided to stock up on food, making quick work of the short walk. It was nice to be able to still move about in the fresh air at least, offering a small, yet nervous smile at the cashier as you paid for your shopping, packed it in your bag and made your way home.

Before you even realised it, you’d settled on the couch and fallen asleep, wrapped up in your fluffy blanket, eyes heavy as you set an alarm.

You slept through the alarm and when you next woke up, there were three missed facetimes from Luke. You called him back immediately.

“There’s the love of our lives.” Luke crowed when he answered, making you laugh. It was followed by a cough which made Luke pause, his eyes studying the screen. “Said love of our lives doesn’t look too well.” The concern was evident and you rolled your eyes.

“It’s probably allergies and my body finally relaxing from the last three weeks of stress.” Luke didn’t look convinced but you managed to switch the conversation. “Did you find out the results of Ashton’s test?”

“Yeah, he came up negative. Since we’ve been quarantined for what, three weeks now? We’ll probably be on the next essential flight back home. But that won’t be for another week from what they’ve said. We both agreed to hang back long enough to let other people go ahead.” You frowned at that.

“But baby, you guys need to be back for the launch.” He shook his head.

“Ash was quite forceful with management on this one. There isn't going to be any kind of physical launch so we’re cleared to be delayed, just as long as we have a good wifi connection for the weekend for the various streams.” You sighed but understood their concerns.

“How is our no longer sick drummer boy?” You finally asked and as if he was waiting for the question, he all but piled himself on top of Luke, a muffled whine escaping as he tried to shove Ashton off him.

You laughed.

“Behave children otherwise no rewards.” You teased them, making the two of them laugh as they settled themselves down on the sofa they were on.

The conversation was easy between the three of you as they both excitedly discussed the possible plans they had for the album release, relying on them being home on time to do so.

“It wouldn’t do well to be still in the air when we do the release party, but knowing our luck...” Ashton trailed off, making you snort.

“Knowing our luck, that’s what would happen.” You grinned and he rolled his eyes.

“Probably.”

The three of you talked until you were dropping off, and despite voicing their concerns, you waved them off, pointing out that you always got like this during allergy season. Ashton didn’t argue the point, but Luke still frowned in concern.

“We love you, sunshine. Get some decent rest please.” He’d pleaded with you and you gave them both a gentle smile in return, hoping that it was at least semi-reassuring.

“I’ll be fine, but I’ll go to bed. Love you two.”

“Love you more.” Came the unified response before the call dropped and you settled back asleep.

Part of you knew that you should’ve realised that they had every right to be concerned when you woke up the following morning.

Your entire body was aching. And what concerned you most was the tightness across your chest coupled with the pain radiating across your body.

When you checked your temperature, you felt your stomach sink at the fact that your fever had crept up and was alarmingly high. So you called the helpline, putting the phone on speaker whilst you waited to get through, sending a text to the group chat you had with your boyfriends.

‘Woke up with fever and body hurts. Struggling to breath too so checking in with the helpline to see what i need to do. Don’t know if I’m gonna be up for calling later bc I wanna sleep.’

You felt bad but you could already feel the drowsiness pull at your body.

When you got through and described your symptoms, the lady on the other end advised you to self-isolate and upon the symptoms getting worse, to call the emergency services.

You relayed the information back to Luke and Ashton before falling asleep after taking some medication, trying to desperately ignore how much your body ached as you slept.

The first few days, it felt like you’d been run over with a truck repeatedly, but what concerned you was the pain that was radiating from your kidneys. Both Luke and Ashton knew of your previous history with kidney failure and both had been urging you to go into the hospital, but you’d couldn’t help but feel that it wasn’t that bad.

By day four, both of your boyfriends were worried because you’d mentioned to them that you were unable to breath properly. It was late at night, but with the pain reaching an overwhelming point, you knew it was pointless to argue. Even your friends had been urging you to contact the helpline once more.

You’d been on hold for over an hour as the pain got worse. You were struggling to focus and it was everything you could do to try and breathe through the agony that was radiating through your body, so you cut off from the hold music and contacted the emergency services.

This time fear started to settle into your stomach as you answered the questions posed to you, trying to get across that it wasn’t a block of flats but a shared home.

The operator understood and urged you to get help from your neighbours to at least let the crew into the building. You were nervous enough about standing up by yourself but you managed.

When you stood from your bed, the walk to the door, even though it was five steps away, the agony that shot up your legs had you stumbling into the door.

Pulling it open, despite your neighbour’s door being six feet away, you knew you weren’t going to be able to stumble that far. The pain was steadily getting worse and tears started falling down your cheeks.

“Can someone help?” You finally got out, gasping for a breath once the words were out. Your neighbour was quick to open the door and knew something was wrong.

“What’s happened, are you okay?”

“Can’t breathe. Called medics, but need someone to let them in.” You gasped out and he nodded, taking a step closer.

“Lets sit you down and I’ll get one of the others to go and wait for them.” The firm grip on your arms supported you, your own hands grasping his arms to keep you from falling as he slowly walked you back to the edge of your bed, setting you down gently.

The pain receded slightly.

“I’m gonna prop the door open and get one of the others to come and give me a hand, is that okay?” And you could only nod tearfully as you tried to take in slow breaths, despite the pain that was radiating from your chest.

With the door propped open, you could hear him banging on the other doors, calling for help and explaining the situation. The hallway wasn’t very long but their voices carried down to you as you tried, and failed, to calm down.

And then the medics were there, pulling the blanket from your shoulders despite how cold you were feeling.

“It’s because of the fever, your body is already warm, you won’t be helping yourself with the blankets.”

They asked various questions and you tried to answer in the gasping breaths, but then the pain shot up and it felt like you couldn’t breathe.

“Okay, we’re getting you to the hospital.”

You could barely move, but between the medic and your neighbour, they managed to get the things you needed and help you down the stairs. It took much longer, but you knew that rushing wasn’t going to help and the pain was pushing close to hitting 10 for you.

Once in the ambulance, you had a cannula inserted, laughing breathlessly between your tears at the first failed attempt and the second attempt to find a vein.

When you reached the hospital, waiting to hear where you needed to be taken, you finally got out your phone, the morphine hindering your ability to focus, hitting the audio button instead to send a voice note to your now worried boyfriends.

“At the hospital. Been given some morphine but still hurts. Missing you and love you lots.” You could barely keep your eyes open, the words slurring together. The medic gave you a kind smile.

“Partner?” You nodded, the motion making you feel nauseous.

“Need to drive to the other side, they’ve got a specific ward set up.” You heard and realised belatedly that the driver must have turned up. The drive was short and finally you were helped from the vehicle into a waiting wheelchair. You were too tired to protest and you knew it would be quicker for you to get situated.

You could hear them talking, explaining your medical history and the symptoms you were displaying. Part of your mind was listening but the other part of your mind was wondering how Ashton and Luke were.

You missed them.

Once in a room, the nurses took over and did some more tests. Eventually you were left alone, your fever creeping higher despite the fact that you felt so cold. You were tired, but the pain that was radiating from your kidneys and joints, it was enough to keep you awake, unable to relax to sleep.

Your phone was going off every few minutes, various people messaging you, making sure that you were okay. The only ones you were really replying to were Luke and Ashton, but even then it was sparse.

It didn’t stop them from worrying.

When the doctor on shift came into your bare room, it took every effort to focus on her words.

“We’ve taken some bloods to help rule out any other possibilities, despite displaying symptoms of the virus. When we have the first results of your bloods back, we’ll be moving you onto one of the wards, so it should be another hour or so.”

You nodded your head, eyes heavy as you let out a tired sigh.

“Any idea of how long I’ll be here for?” Despite the mask in place, you could see her cheeks lifting up into what you assumed was a smile.

“Less than 24 hours, I’d assume. Try to get some rest, another nurse will be taking some obs in about an hour, before you need to be moved hopefully.” You nodded tiredly, curling up on your side. It seemed to be the only relief you could find.

You drifted in and out, the stark quietness of your room so different to the usual noises you had of cars passing by or Ashton and Luke’s steady breathing.

When the nurse came back in, you were beyond exhausted. You felt nauseous and the pain wasn’t receding.

“We’re going to be moving you instead, they’ll do all the obs that they need once you’re settled in the room. I’m just waiting on the porters.” You nodded tiredly as she unplugged your phone charger and placed your bag at the bottom of the bed.

You kept your face turned into the pillow, the lights hurting your eyes.

“Sensitive to the light?” Came a kind voice, you could only let out a muffled noise of agreement. When you were wheeled into the room, the light was dimmed down and you felt more relaxed.

Glancing at the time you hadn’t realised it’d been so long. The numbers read 7am and you could feel your body shaking, your mind taking a minute to catch up with the fact that you were cold.

The next few hours were difficult. You went from being too hot to freezing cold, the pain creeping up as you tried to curl in on yourself to warm up. Even with additional blankets, you were still shaking, teeth chattering when you tried to talk.

When they took the second round of bloods, you didn’t offer any argument, simply holding out your arm for them to take the blood from. Things were getting hazy and you couldn’t focus on the nurse as he spoke to you about what was going to happen.

You knew some of it was tiredness. Despite the mini naps you were having, you hadn’t slept solidly in nearly 48 hours.

“We’re going to be coming in to do the test in a moment.” You found yourself confused as a different nurse explained what was going to happen and she took her time to make sure you understood each part.

Once it was done, your cough having flared up after having the swab hit the back of your throat you noticed that you had missed calls.

‘How did I not hear them?’ You thought to yourself, confused. You clicked on the notification and realised it was Luke that had been calling.

“Hi angel, we were just checking in.” His voice seemed to set off the tears, unable to understand why you were so tearful. But he heard the sniffle.

“Sweetheart, I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. You know we’re here for you.”

“I just wanna be home with you two.” You choked out, a cough escaping, the motion making you feel sick.

“I know angel, what have the doctors said?” You tried to steady your breathing so you wouldn’t set your coughing off again.

“Two weeks self quarantine.” You finally got out, wiping a few stray tears away. You heard the two of them sigh in unison.

“Maybe we could—”

“Ash no. If they are sick with the virus, it’s likely to just pass between the three of us.” Luke interrupted and you had to hold back the sob.

“I’m scared.” You finally admitted quietly and tried to stop the sob that was crawling up your throat. You knew that if you’d started, you were most likely not going to stop.

“Baby.” Ashton whispered and you sucked in a deep breath, determined not to ask the question.

“Lu’s right. It’d just pass between the three of us. I should have maybe another week of symptoms.” Your voice was quiet but they heard you.

“We’re not going home.” Luke’s voice finally filtered through. “Not with you being in hospital and not with you being so sick. We’re staying in a hotel till your symptoms die down and then we’re gonna come and look after you.”

You couldn’t even argue with them. They were both as stubborn as mules and having them would make the recovery easier with some help.

“How are you gonna get here?” You finally gasped out.

“We’ve got a rented car. We extended it the day you got sick.” You felt your heart warm at their words.

“Okay.” You finally muttered.

Eventually you were discharged with medication for the fever and a reminder to keep your fluid intake up at least.

The journey back was exhausting.

The medic was kind enough to chat to you about your job, about Luke and Ashton. He didn’t bat an eyelash when you mentioned them both. He was quick to help you figure out where the turning was, especially in the dark. And he helped you to the door of the building.

Just the journey up the stairs was tiring, and your neighbours heard you arrive, the three of them checking that you were okay.

“Until my breathing gets worse, I can self manage at home. However, I need rest and my body currently feels like I’ve been run over multiple times.”

One of them checked about collecting your food shop the following morning and you smiled in return before getting into your bedroom and collapsing on the bed.

You made sure that your phone charger was plugged in before sending a text to Luke and Ashton saying you were home. It was barely another five minutes before you fell into a fitful sleep.

The following day you were woken to a knock on your door, but you could barely move. Sleep had been scarce and your joints felt so heavy.

“Don’t try and get up! Just letting you know that I’m off to get your shopping! I should be back in an hour or so.” Your neighbour called through the door and you felt a little bit of relief flood you at that.

“Thanks!” You called back before coughing, twisting sharply to the side where the bowl lay, your body aching when the coughing stopped.

You’d had the bowl lay there since the night before you’d gone into hospital, terrified that the coughing would lead you to throwing up. You weren’t good with vomit at the best of times but this was another level.

Collapsing onto your back, taking in slow deep breaths as you tried to calm your heart down, you took a few moments before taking some meds, pulling the covers off your body to help you cool down. This was the one thing about fever that wasn’t fun for you.

You ended up napping on and off, unable to pay attention to your phone at the various texts coming through from concerned friends before there was another knock on the door which jolted you awake, despite feeling disorientated.

“I’m leaving the bags just outside your doors! Give me a couple of minutes and I’ll have them all up.” You didn’t reply as you heard the hallway door shut, and instead slowly moved to collect one of the face masks you’d been given, slipping it on with ease before grabbing disinfectant wipes.

You ignored the dizziness that caught you off guard, taking a steadying breath as you waited, leaning heavily against the door.

“Right, they’re all there for you chicken!” Your neighbours voice was more distant and you hesitantly opened the door. He was standing halfway down the hallway, a kind smile on his face.

“How are you feeling today?” The concern was genuine and you could only shrug.

“A lot of pain. Not sleeping well.” You got out breathlessly. He frowned.

“Well if you need anything, you’ve got my number now, so just give me a text, especially if you need any drinks. You take care of yourself now.” You lifted your hand in acknowledgement before propping open the living room door and heading in there where your fridge sat.

When the food was put away, you were half staggering the few steps back to your bed, barely getting your mask off and on your desk before you half collapsed on your bed.

Glancing at your phone there was a missed call from Ashton.

“Hi love, you weren’t responding so we figured to call you.” His voice was hesitant when you’d accepted the call.

“Everything hurts Ash.” You finally sobbed, your body protesting the movement, but in that moment you couldn’t care. You missed them both and with the combined pain, it didn’t help.

“Baby.” Luke’s voice was soft and you knew they were worried, but you were too far gone to understand their worries. You just wanted them.

“Want you both, and can’t even have that because of this fucking virus.” You got out a cough ending the sentence as you tried to catch your breath and not choke.

“Calming breaths sweetheart. You’re okay.” Ashton soothed immediately and you tried to follow his instructions. But everything hurt. There was a sharp pain in your chest, coupled with the pain in your lower back as well as the joint aches. It practically burned you.

“Do you think you can manage a shower later, love? It might help.” Luke’s voice was hesitant once you were calm enough and you took in a deep breath.

“Maybe.” You got out, your voice quieter and they knew you were tired.

“Rest for a bit angel, see if you can try and get a few hours at least.” Ashton encouraged and you could feel the heaviness wash over you as you settled down.

“Love you both.” You tiredly got out before you let yourself sink into sleep, taking a slow deep breath as you did.

You didn’t hear their returned words or them cutting the call, you’d fallen asleep easily and your body relaxed just a little bit as you slept.

When you next woke up, it was dark. Making sure that you were at least drinking, you had another glass of juice followed by some water before pulling yourself up to take a shower. You texted them both and your best friend to let them know you’d slept some and you were about to attempt a shower.

It was slow going, trying to keep yourself upright, but the steam helped clear your sinuses, making sure you got every part of you with the scrubber before just standing under the shower, your hands pressed into the cold tiles to keep you upright.

It’d been thirty minutes by the time you’d returned to your room, feeling more tired than when you’d first woken, so you took the opportunity to try and get more sleep.

That was when the coughing became so violent at two in the morning that you felt like you were practically choking on air, unable to catch a breath until you’d rolled onto your side and something cleared enough for you to take a gasping breath, your heart racing so fast that you had to call your best friend to calm down.

It became frightening as days began to pass and you could barely recall them, your mind confused and muddled with exhaustion mixed in with the hunger that was plaguing you. But when you’d eaten, your body had rejected the food immediately so you didn’t try again.

By day ten, you were struggling. You’d cried far too much and your body felt like lead. You knew that both Luke and Ashton were concerned at this point, knowing that this was the point where either you’d start to get better or it could get worse.

Two days later, between fitful nap and gasping breaths after a coughing fit, your phone went off.

It was Ashton.

“Baby?” You got out tiredly, keeping measured breaths as you sat up slowly.

“Take a look outside your bedroom window.” You frowned, moving to the otherside of the room, leaning enough to peer out of your open window before a sob escaped.

They both stood there, arms laden with bags. Both were looking up at you.

“Reckon you can come let us in angel? Lu and I are gonna commandeer your living room ‘till you’re better.” It took everything in you not to go racing down the stairs. You knew it would set you back further so you took hesitant breaths before looking back to your phone then you heard a voice in the hallway.

You were quick enough to catch your neighbour as he was heading back to his room.

“You alright there petal?” His voice was concerned and you held your hand up indicating you needed a moment to catch your breath. He waited patiently.

“My, my partners, they’re downstairs with some shopping and taking over my living room till I’m better. Could you let them in for me please?” You were hesitant in asking, but the pleading eyes you had seemed to have his shoulders wilt as he took a step forward.

“I take it they’re gonna be self-isolating for the two weeks they need to?” You nodded.

“I’ve got to wait seven days after my fever stops as it is before I can even be in the same room as them. I know that they’re worried and being so far hasn’t really helped.” He smiled kindly.

“Got you, petal. Get back in and I’ll go get them for you.”

You could hear their voices get closer and it took everything in you not to throw yourself out of the room at them. You didn’t want them to get sick.

“Delivered safely petal, feel better soon.” Your neighbour called and you tried not to let out a sob.

“Hi angel.” It took everything in you not to open the door. You had to clench your hands into a fist, head resting on the door.

“I don’t know what’s harder. You both being away, or you being so close but I can’t even see you.” You let out a choked cough and Luke let out a soothing noise.

“Well we’ve got you some good wifi now, and we’re here for you angel. We’ve got a couple of streams and you best be watching when we go live.” You let out a breathless giggle. They were there.

The first few days were the hardest. They’d leave cartons of juice and bottles of water outside your door. It finally added to fruit when you managed to keep an orange down.

Watching them do the streams from your living room was strange, but it seemed to settle your anxiety that they were so close. You could see it was being brought up about their shared change of scenery which prompted them to explain after you’d texted Ashton and told him that it was okay for them to know about your situation.

“So our partner, well they got pretty sick at the start of last week. We were already stuck in the UK at this point, so we just extended it so that we’d be with them when they got better. None of us handle being sick alone very well.” This made the other three laugh. You grinned.

“I think that extends to the rest of the band too.” Luke piped up, making the other two complain loudly. You giggled before coughing violently.

“Oops. As you can probably hear, it got real bad and real close by the end of last week. It’s why we were so distracted on the live because we were so worried. When they told us that they’d slept for a solid six hours last night, we made the drive back to theirs, shopping in tow to help look after them. We can’t see them, and Luke and I are stuck on the couch for the next two weeks at least, but we couldn’t just fly out and leave them alone.”

Ashton’s explanation had well wishes pouring in for you and it warmed your heart to see that there were fans that cared.

Part of you wished you could at least be watching them, or better yet, be cuddled up with them, to hell with the stream. But you knew they were trying to keep the focus on the album. You’d already had texts from the others to check in with you and you took your time to reply to them and settle down, your eyes heavy as you snuggled under the covers.

It was nice to watch them, seeing the ease in the way they joked about. You knew they worried but it was obvious to anyone who saw them when you’d gone into hospital that the tension that was sat on the both of them was both obvious and heartbreaking.

You could see the shadows under Luke’s eyes and you wondered if they traded the nights between each other to make sure they wouldn’t miss an update or a call.

You tried to squash down the guilt instant that reared up. They were doing this because they cared. There was nothing in it for them, apart from the possibility of you getting better. But you knew they expected nothing back.

Your eyes were tired and you took in the time. It was creeping closer to midnight so you closed off the stream and texted the chat to let them both know you were going to sleep. Had you stayed on the stream a few moments longer, you’d have seen Ashton’s face relax as a gentle smile crept onto his lips, causing the two that were still stateside to tease him.

The following morning was better in some way but also worse. Your cough wasn’t easing up but your fever seemed to have broken in the night.

You weren’t overheating but you weren’t cold either. You took a few moments to move your limbs and regretted it almost instantly. But you knew that if your fever stayed down, it would be a further week until you weren’t contagious.

Part of you wanted to practically sing in joy, but as you took in the early morning, you decided against that, knowing your men would be fast asleep still.

Slowly you got yourself up, collecting your shower stuff before making your way down the hallway to the shower. The warm water felt almost luxurious on your skin as you took care in washing your hair, still leaning against the cold tiles to keep yourself upright, your legs trembling as you did so.

It took the same amount of time as the previous shower, but once you were clean, you knew it made a small amount of difference as you stumbled back to your room, crawling under the covers to take a well deserved nap.

You missed the text from Luke asking if you were awake.

Now that you seemed to be stomaching food, Ashton kept it simple with dry toast, not willing to push your body too far. And you agreed with his judgement after he’d placed it in front of your door and you waited for the other door to close before you opened yours.

“Love you.” You felt your heart melt as he spoke through the door.

“Love you too Ash. Thank you.” You returned quietly before stepping back into your room. It was getting harder to stay in, especially when your cuddle monsters of boyfriends were just in the next room.

It hurt.

They FaceTimed with you to keep you company, both of them making a strong effort to not only keep you company but to also stop you from giving into temptation to just join them.

Ashton was practically insistent on that.

You knew by the time that you would be allowed to have them back in your room, their own self isolation would be over.

It didn’t fail to amuse you how Ashton started cooking once you started being able to stomach more than dry toast. It took a few goes but he kept it plain enough to not make your stomach complain but changed it up so you didn’t get bored of it.

What made it even better were the small notes of affection they left for you on the tray which held your food. You had them pinned up to your cork board without a second though, the small pieces of heaven from them only making it feel that much cosier.

Something to ward away the bad days in the future.

Luke snuck you some of your favourite snacks, even after the scolding Ashton gave him when he tried sneaking you a chocolate bar.

It’d made you giggle and they’d both paused to hear it.

It was a sound they hadn’t heard in nearly a month and it made their hearts soar.

Despite the pain you were in, it felt like you could at least breathe with the both of them with you. Even if you couldn’t see them.

By day nine after your fever had broken, you were beginning to feel semi human once more. You still had issues with exhaustion and light sensitivity, but you certainly felt more better than you had done in weeks.

Luke had given up on waiting.

“Ash, they said a week after the fever went down, they’d no longer be contagious. This is killing me.” You’d chosen to curl up on the side that was proclaimed as Luke’s side.

Your heart was feeling heavy again.

“I mean. We’re what? A week and a half?” Ashton’s voice was hesitant. You missed the mutter in return before the door opened and there was a knock on your door.

Luke stuck his head in and you wanted to cry.

“Reckon you can put up with some self care cuddles?” You simply nodded your head and shuffled into the middle of the bed. Luke wasted no time, his arms wrapped around you and you could feel every part of you seemingly shaking.

Ashton followed a few minutes later and your memory seemed to fail you in that moment. You could barely remember the last six weeks, but the feeling of comfort was something entirely different as they held you.

That was when you began to sob in earnest because you’d missed them. And they knew it.

When you’d calmed down, part of you felt torn because you wanted to hold them both, not let go and just lay there. But they didn’t protest when you’d snuggle up to one, legs tangled and arms wrapped around tight and eventually switch to the other.

If anything, it amused them both.

As the day got later, Ashton untangled himself, pressing a kiss to your shoulder. Luke was your current cuddle buddy of choice.

Turning your head, your confusion must have shown because Ashton smiled gently.

“We need to keep up with the meals, love. I’m gonna make some soup for all of us, how does that sound?” You hummed in agreement.

“It’s allowed I guess. But you gotta come back.” And he chuckled, leaning over to kiss your forehead, doing the same to Luke before disappearing out of your room.

“You realise that he’s going to mother hen you to death, right?” Luke teased and you shrugged.

“He’s here. You both are. That’s more than enough for me.” You murmured softly. Luke held you that little bit tighter.

“You up for a shower sweetheart?” You hesitated, your mind drifting back to the previous two times you showered. The hesitation must have been obvious because Luke pressed a kiss to the top of your head, not willing to push you.

“Will you, will you help? It’ll be a tight fit but, I struggled the last two times.” You finally admitted to him and he smiled.

“C’mon. We can let the chef know as we pass him.” You giggled at his words, allowing him to help you out of the bed and making your way slowly across the room. Luke didn’t push, but he kept his arms available and easy for you to grab if you needed him.

You’d made it to the kitchen before you relied on him a bit more, your joints achy and your legs shaking.

“Gonna get this one showered and clean.” Luke called into the kitchen where Ashton was cooking. He glanced back and grinned at you both before turning back to the food and you two carried on.

Luke was nothing but patient with you as you climbed into the shower, his tall body fitting into the rest of the space. He was gentle as he helped you and it took the pressure off you, focusing on keeping yourself upright as his hands started working the shampoo into your hair.

You’d forgotten how well he massaged your scalp when washing your hair, and you only protested when he rinsed it out, making him laugh.

“I forgot how nice your head massages were.” You groaned as he worked the conditioner in. You carefully washed your body with the shower gel, cleaning Luke’s body whilst you were at it.

He tried to stop you but you gave him pleading eyes and he relented easily. Using the time whilst your hair was soaking in the conditioner to wash his own hair quickly whilst you cleaned his body.

And then his fingers were back in your hair, cleaning out the conditioner and you had to stop yourself from leaning into him.

Once you were clean and dried off, dressed and the towels over Luke’s shoulder, you could feel yourself begin to flag again, leaning heavily on Luke for the short trip back to your room.

“I’ve got you sweet.” He murmured as you passed the kitchen. Ashton was talking with one of your neighbours who gave you a small wave but didn’t stop you to talk. Part of you felt guilty, but the larger part felt relieved because you were almost certain once you’d eaten something, you were going to be asleep.

Once you were back in your bedroom, you scooted so that your back was resting against the headboard whilst Luke let the towels hang so that they could dry and put everything back in its place. He understood your need for everything in its own place, whilst Ashton understood, but still sometimes made a small game of moving things to see if you’d notice.

Luke could see that you were too tired to even be playful.

When Ashton returned, he frowned for a moment before resting the first bowl on your lap, spoon already in the bowl.

“Don’t worry about eating it all. Just try to eat something for us.” He encouraged gently, handing Luke his own bowl before heading back to retrieve his own.

You were slow and methodical before your stomach protested and you left the spoon in the bowl, your head resting on Luke’s shoulder.

“M’ready for sleep.” You muttered and he hummed in acknowledgement. He’d long since finished his bowl, as had Ashton.

“You alright with Ash for a bit, love? Since he cooked, I’ll clean.” Luke murmured and you just nodded before shuffling till you were laid down. Ashton followed and you snuggled into him.

You barely heard his murmured “sleep well” before you were fast asleep.

It was the first night that you’d slept for eight hours and it felt almost refreshing, especially after having the shower the previous night.

You were still nestled into Ashton’s side, Luke’s arm was slung over you both, his hand resting on Ashton’s stomach. You felt very safe between your men and you were so grateful that they were with you in that moment.

It was another hour before either of them stirred, but you’d been resting in that hour, not really awake but not asleep either. Luke was first to move, pressing a kiss to your shoulder as he moved off the bed.

“Morning, love. How are you feeling today?” He murmured as he stretched. You shifted onto your back and gave an experimental test of your joints. They weren’t so bad and your cough had eased up that your chest no longer hurt if there was the occasional cough.

“Better, I think. It’s only a dull ache, the kind I get when you two put me through the paces at the gym.” You admitted softly and Luke grinned as Ashton stretched out, almost like a cat before turning on his side to face you.

“Nice to hear that, angel. And good morning.” You grinned at him and kissed him gently before glancing at the time.

“What are we doing today?” You asked quietly as Luke continued to stretch out his muscles. Part of you felt bad for them both to be stuck inside with you, but you were much too selfish to let that bad feeling linger.

“I’m gonna do some exercises and then Ash is probably gonna do his own. And then a movie day for the rest of the day?” He posed the question and you paused before nodding your head. It sounded good to you and it meant you had some individual time with each of them.

The morning passed by easily. They did their exercises and showered before returning to your room that Luke had playfully dubbed ‘The Den’. Ashton had laughed at that as he went to set up in the living room for another live, but this time Luke was staying with you. They’d been trading off which had bothered you first, but then Ashton explained their reason.

“We don’t really want to leave you alone. Not that you can’t take care of yourself,” he hastily added on upon seeing your look of outrage, “but being so far away whilst you were so ill, it kinda scared us. We don’t want to leave you by yourself yet. It’s more to ease our own anxieties.” And you relaxed before shoving any negative thoughts to the back of your mind.

Luke was napping when your phone went off-Ashton was still on the live-and you answered the No Caller ID hesitantly.

It was the hospital that you were at, a nurse confirming who you were before she’d go any further. It took a few moments before she got to the point of the phone call.

“So we’re calling you about the various tests. I’m assuming that you know you were confirmed with COVID-19, correct?”

“Yeah, about two days after the test, someone called to let me know.” You responded hesitantly. You wondered what this was about.

“And how are you feeling?” You were confused.

“I mean, I’m coming up to two weeks of no fever and starting to feel a lot better. I’m just more exhausted but I suspect that’s because of what my body went through.” You explained quietly and you heard her hum in agreement. Luke shifted beside you and you noticed that he was awake, only because his hand had started to drift up and down your spine.

“That’s good to hear. What I’m calling about is that you’d said your kidneys had been hurting upon admittance, correct?”

“Yes.” You were worried now.

“So when we looked at the numbers, we noticed that they’d started dropping. Not drastically enough for us to have you in intensive care, but that was why we moved you to the ward. It was as a precaution.” You felt your heart race at her words.

“They’d started failing again, hadn’t they?” You whispered and she sighed.

“Yes. However, because the numbers were back on the rise when we took your second blood test, we felt that we could discharge you safely. Had they dropped further, you’d have been admitted to intensive care. The only reason why you weren’t told immediately was because we didn’t want you to panic or go into further distress which could’ve made it much more worse.”

It hit you like a ton of bricks what she was saying.

“Is there anything I need to worry about?” You finally choked out, your hands trembling.

“At this time, no. When things ease up, we will request you get another test just to confirm you’re clear of the virus. Otherwise for now, just rest up and feel better soon.”

“Thank you.” You got out, ending the call. Luke took the phone from your trembling hands and he sat up, pulling you onto his lap, his arms around you.

“What happened, love?” You were trying to take in slow deep breaths to stop the panic attack, knowing that it wouldn’t help you.

“They’ve just told me, when I went into hospital, my kidneys were failing.” You whispered and his arms tightened around you tighten enough that he understood the implications.

You’d told them both of the previous two times when you’d been so ill that your kidneys had started failing and as a result you’d been on death's door.

You didn’t realise you were hyperventilating until Luke began to rub his hands up and down your arms to try and distract you, but your mind was too focused on the fact that you’d escaped death, again.

“Ashton!” Luke called loudly, a tinge of panic in his own voice.

Ashton practically crashed through into your door and his face was ashen as he took in your state, a look of relief followed by concern filling his features. He clambered onto the bed, his hands cupping your face gently. When you didn’t flinch away, he ducked his head to catch your eyes.

“Slow deep breaths sweetheart. We’ve got you.” It took you a while before you could finally focus on Luke’s hands which were still rubbing your arms gently.

“How’s your sense of smell?” Ashton teased as he noted that you were fighting to keep your breathing under control.

“Smell you and Luke, favourite smell.” You muttered and he grinned. You closed your eyes for a moment, leaning into his touch and he let his thumb brush across your cheeks in comfort.

“What happened?” Despite the question being directed at you, you knew that Ashton was also asking Luke.

“A nurse from the hospital phoned I think. They explained about the blood tests they’d run. Apparently their kidneys were failing when they’d gone in, but not enough to alarm the hospital staff or get them rushed to intensive care.” His voice was calm and you needed that.

You knew that Ashton understood what he wasn’t saying, but also you weren’t too sure if you could voice it properly without crying.

“Come here sweetheart.” Ashton’s tone brokered no arguments and you moved so that you were cradled in his lap, his back resting against the headboard. Luke was nestled as close as possible.

“Part of me knew something was wrong, but, not that.” You whispered finally. Ashton made a soothing sound as you let your head rest on his shoulder, face pressed into his neck.

“It’s one thing to guess, it’s another thing to be told, love. You’re allowed to cry because it’s a frightening thing to be told.” His voice was one of reason and you finally let it out, allowing them both to comfort you as you processed what had been said.

He wasn’t wrong. It was one thing to guess, but to be told that your kidneys had started failing once more, it was frightening.

Neither of them moved away from you as you got it off your chest. You couldn’t pin how long had passed until you finally took a steadying breath, lifting your head from Ashton’s neck. Luke was first to move, his thumb wiping the tear tracks and you gave him a weak smile.

It dawned on you then that Ashton had been on a live.

“Ash, I’m sorry.” You finally whispered and he gave you a confused look.

“What are you sorry for? You’ve got nothing to be sorry for.” He murmured, pressing a kiss to your temple.

“The live you were doing...” You trailed off and he shrugged.

“They’ll get over it. You’re more important and we’re doing more radio interviews on the live so it doesn’t matter.” He muttered and you didn’t push, relaxing in his hold. Luke glanced at the clock and gave you a gentle smile.

“My turn to make lunch. Nothing cooked unfortunately, but I make a damn good sandwich.” He teased playfully which made you giggle, a sigh escaping your lips as he left after giving you both gentle kisses.

“Just think, tomorrow we can take you out for a short walk.”

“Freedom.” You muttered deadpan, making him laugh as his lips found yours.

“Even for half an hour, it’ll help. Home stretch now.” You mustered up a smile for him before stretching your legs out and he moved with you, his arms not quite leaving your body.

“Am I not allowed to lie down?” You queried and he shook his head, a playful grin on his lips as he pulled you flush against his body, his lips finding your neck.

“No, all mine to have and feast on.” The cackle like laugh that he let off had you giggling as he blew a raspberry on your skin. This earned a squeal from you, laughing as he rocked you back and forth. “No one can take you from me!”

You were still laughing when Luke returned with three plates, an amused grin on his lips as he raised an eyebrow.

“Save me Lu! Ash is gonna feast on me!” You shrieked again as he blew another raspberry into your neck, the ticklish sensation making you laugh as he held you tightly.

Luke set the plates down before climbing on the bed, his lips curving into a smirk, making you pause.

“Can I feast with you Ash?” And you groaned as Ashton laughed as Luke straddled the both of you, his body causing the three of you to fall back onto the bed, effectively trapping you between the two of them as Luke left gentle kisses along your neck and you held back your moan, knowing that if he started to pull at the skin you were a goner.

Pulling back, he had a cheeky grin on his lips and you groaned as Ashton laughed.

“You two are the worst. Let me eat, you monsters!” You cried out playfully, making them both laugh as Luke shifted himself off you to get the plates once more and Ashton loosened his hold on your waist.

The rest of the day passed quietly, Ashton had apologised for having to ditch and the three of you settled watching movies long into the early hours of the morning.

Despite the lack of sleep, you were still up early excited that you were finally allowed to go for a walk today, and both of them laughed at your excitement.

Once you were dressed, they followed your lead and got ready. And then you were out of the building and the fresh air felt glorious, even if there was a spattering of rain. You didn’t care.

You led them both to a small pathway that led to the river that ran through the town, the edge of the river filled with cherry blossom trees. Both of them were taking as many photos as they could and you couldn’t hide your smile if you tried.

Ashton managed to get a nice selfie of the three of you under one of the trees and before long, you realised that the half an hour had gone by and you were beginning to struggle, your legs becoming a little bit shaky.

But it didn’t deter from the fact that you’d been able to go out for a walk and enjoy it. Both Luke and Ashton could see the immediate difference.

“We’ll go out every day and stay an extra five minutes longer. Build you up. How does that sound?” Ashton asked as you walked up the driveway, arm in arm with the both of them.

“That sounds good. Onwards and upwards from here and I am so going to kick your butts at Mario Kart now.”

Their laughter rang around the empty drive as you reached the building and you felt much more positive with them by your sides.

if you wanna be added to my taglist just hmu!!

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if you’ve been removed from my taglist it’s because i couldn’t tag you!!

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hey-hamlet · 5 years ago

Text

BNHA AU Ideas: Grand Design

Also on AO3!

TL;DR:

If you asked the Heroics Commission why they created Izuku, you'd get an answer pretty close to the truth. The rising power of quirks was making them nervous, and All Might won't live forever.

What they aren't mentioning is the fact that they don't like All Might either.

He's kind and good and dedicated to people over the country. The man will break countless laws to save a single life and has defied the heroics commission on many occasions - something they can't punish him for in any way without being slammed by the media.

So, they come up with a plan.

if you asked the heroics commission why they created Izuku, you'd get an answer pretty close to the truth

the rising power of quirks was making them nervous, and all might won't live forever. 'there might be another quirk as powerful as all mights just around the corner for the heroes' you might say. 'we're just taking away the 'might'' they'd reply

but what they aren't mentioning is the fact that they don't like All Might either.

he's kind and good and dedicated to people over country. the man will break countless laws to save a single life and has defied the heroics commission on many occasions - something they can't punish him for in any way without being slammed by the media

so, they come up with a plan

"if we can't control all might, we make the next all might ourselves"

sure, the doctor who does the work for them is a little shady, but it can't be helped. quirk genetic experiments were recently made illegal in a case spearheaded by nezu himself. nezu doesn't exactly agree with a total ban and is encouraging regulation in place of a blanket stop, but its been years and the laws are going nowhere fast

maybe the man has some shady connections to some shady people all too eager to replace all might? oh well, it can be managed

a pregnant woman called Inko Midoriya shows up at a hospital, dead on arrival, with the baby inside her still clinging to life?

well.

thats just convenient, isn't it?

they extract the child, pronounce the mother dead and whisk the child away into 'foster care', or the arms of the good doctor

when he's revealed to be quirkless? at first the commission is dubious but the doctor assures them this is perfect. he doesn't have to base the quirk off anything, it can be built from the ground up, as exactly the quirk the commission wants

izuku is born 3 months premature to a dead mother and one month later has a strong enough combination of quirks to take down all might when he grows up.

there is a bit of a catch, though. due to the whole 3 months early and dead mother thing, his constitution isn't the greatest, leaving him pretty sickly. the doctor assures him he'll be much better when he grows up (he’s lying). still - it’s a long while until their creation will be an adult. they could let him grow up normally in a nice house, only to pounce on him when he's grown a little stronger

but a chance of letting their perfect child slip away? nope. they resolve to train him as soon as he can crawl.

A few variations of this AU bc I had loads of quirk ideas before I settled on one - Knock Off For All: Izuku has a quirk as similar to OFA as was possible to create without being able to stockpile, complete with the achy breaky bones (no extra quirks) - Power Set: Izuku has a set of the most useful quirks the doctor could think of, ala USJ nomu (Shock nullification, Regeneration, Super Strength, etc) - Midorigiri: Izuku has a powerful combination quirk like a certain cloud mist dude. Probably either a shock absorption + redirection quirk / all 4 elemental types / guardian angel: wings, flight, hard light construct, healing - All for Naught: Izuku has a knock off of All for One that lets him perma copy 5 quirks at a time

So, Guardian Angel is the quirk I’m going with, mostly for the Hawks parallels. They end up basically being raised with each other, hawks jokingly calling Izuku his little brother. He almost cries when Izuku asks what that is.

Izuku’s quirk allows him to fly with a set of wings (he has hollow bones to facilitate this), can create hard light constructs; the more complicated the shape the harder it is and was originally classified as a forcefield quirk before Izuku got creative with it, and gives him the ability to heal.

All abilities excluding flight are based on the amount of ambient light. The brighter it is, the stronger his constructs and the better he can heal. His blood glows. Make of that what you will.

The problem being that while his quirk/s are strong, Izuku himself is very weak. He has chronic anaemia, difficulty putting on weight, a heart murmur, weak lungs, etc. the HA don’t care at all and make him train until he can’t walk.

From birth till 7 Izuku has no contact with people outside the facility, whereupon he is promptly dumped into a public school for 5 days a week. The education he gets there isn’t important, he’ll learn what he needs at the facility. What they do deem as important is A, creating a paper trail for the kid and B, socializing him somewhat.

People flock to him for his quirk, cementing what they always told him. “All of your worth is in your quirk. You have an obligation to save others.”

Plus, they’ve told him he wasn’t born like everyone else, he was created. Different, artificial, inhuman, those where all words used to describe him at the facility. He finds it difficult to make friends.

He forms a strange almost friendship with Bakugo as the only other kid with a super powerful quirk in the school, even if it’s more of a support quirk than anything else. Izuku silently heals Bakugo when he gets into fights, Bakugo snarls at anyone who makes Izuku too uncomfortable. It’s odd, but it works.

Izuku’s personality is similar to canon in the fact he's the same person but it’s a little jumbled.

He’s even less trusting of adults than canon which is saying something, but he doesn’t have canons blatant disregard for authority. If he breaks a rule he makes sure he doesn’t get caught because the punishments he’s had before left scars.

His anger runs a little closer to the surface but he feels like a bad person for feeling any emotion that isn’t positive so he crushes it down under forced optimism. Izuku shows his anger rarely and when he does, it’s quiet and vicious.

If an authority figure tells him to do something, he does it. It takes a while for Aizawa to break the kid’s conditioned need to respond automatically to any request from a ‘Handler’. Aizawa is very afraid of where it came from, but Nezu can’t find anything about this kid other than the record of his birth and his school enrolments.

Izuku thinks he’s less valuable than others which is pretty canon, at least at the start, but here it’s because he’s ‘not as good/natural/ something’ as a ‘normal’ human. Most of the UA teacher see it, but they have no idea why he thinks he’s lesser so their mixed attempts at questioning/comfort fall pretty flat. Izuku is convinced they would abandon him if they knew.

So, Izuku has a complicated relationship with the concept of All Might.

To start off with, even with everything that happened, Izuku adores heroes right down to his very core. Hawks counts the HA lucky that they didn’t accidentally turn Izuku into a villain. Izuku’s favourite hero is All Might, but -

For a start, he was told he was made to be better than All Might. The part of the HA that created him isn’t fond of the no. 1 as someone they can’t at all control, Izuku has basically been taught that All Might is lying to the world with the way he presents himself and that he’s secretly a terrible person and would hate him for both being artificial and for being made to be better than him

Ergo, Izuku is shit scared of him.

Izuku wants to go to UA because Katsuki is going to UA and Katsuki is the only person other than Hawks he’s ever had a somewhat close relationship with. The HA thinks: eh, fuck it, it’ll be a nice fuck you to All Might anyway.

Then All Might is announced as a teacher after Izuku has been accepted and all hell breaks loose.

A brief set of things that happen:

Dadmight and Dadzawa to the extreme, all of 1A basically adopts Izuku instantly (after they get over the fear of his crazy quirk lmao). All Might and Eraserhead are Izuku’s favourite heroes, other than Hawks, so he's both terrified and in awe of them at all times. He finds himself both loving the familial affection he was denied as a child and being terrified they’d think he was a monster when they learnt he was made to overtake All Might, and isn’t a ‘real person’.

Izuku gets OFA, eventually. It ends up improving his physical health which is neat, along with its extra quirks and strengthening of his own.

Todoroki hates Izuku a little from the beginning, although he’d never admit it. Izuku’s quirk is incredibly powerful and he didn’t have to undergo Todoroki’s childhood torment (Which is Incorrect, but he doesn’t exactly know that, does he) When Todoroki finds out (sports festival, Izuku has a pretty emotional response to his little angst time and lets a few things slip) he becomes fiercely protective of him.

Izuku and Bakugo develop an actual friendship and it’s an adventure

Izuku gets kidnapped along with Bakugo at the training camp, during which the doctor, AFO or Shigiraki reveal he was created to beat All Might, just like the Nomu. Izuku wants to run away out of fear/shame, but Bakugo drags him along with the rescue attempt. Izuku, too scared to go back to the HA or UA, wants nothing more than to vanish off the face of the earth. When Aizawa and All Might visit him and Bakugo at the hospital, Izuku breaks down crying and cowers in fear, convinced his teachers are either going to hurt or kill him. Everyone involved is horrified. They try to calm him down but just seeing them is scaring the shit out of Izuku so they end up getting chased out by Bakugo who clumsily comforts him.

#grand design au #bnha au #bnha #midoriya izuku #bakugou katsuki #All Might #yagi toshinori #izuku #midoriya #aizawa shouta #eraserhead #todoroki shouto

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lilaachearts-archived · 4 years ago

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( lee chaeyoung / isa , cis woman ) have you seen BORA HO ? i heard SHE is an ASTROPHYSICS MAJOR at EVERGREEN UNIVERSITY and a VOLUNTEER at the SAN VERTO LIBRARY. they’re 21 years old and they’ve been living in san verto for 3 YEARS. they tend to be CALM & CHARISMATIC, but rumor has it they can also be OPINIONATED & UNFORGIVING. [ tally, 25, GMT+4, she/her ] @foolsstarters

tw // brief mention of abuse

bora ho –– lee chaeyoung / isa fc

nicknames: idk give her nicknames

birthday: january 1st, 2000 - 21 yrs old ; capricorn

cis woman, she/her, bisexual

born in brooklyn, new york.

past !

bora’s mother wanted her youngest child, and only daughter, to be nothing short of prim and proper. and all her life, as much as she hated it, the young girl went along with it; going by her parents’ very traditional and outdated rules for her own personal safety. unlike her oldest brother, she hated every bit of it. and unlike her second oldest brother, yooseung, she knew how to keep it together and go with the flow for her survival in a house where their parents weren’t afraid of using extreme methods behind closed doors.

bora was calm, collected, and despite being so restricted by rules, she did things her own way. she was a straight A student, especially in subjects that her peers hated. physics and chemistry were things she especially excelled at. although her teachers would accuse her of cheating on her tests because she was skipping classes whenever she felt like it. bora would respond saying that it wasn’t that hard for her to catch up. she had a talent for learning quickly, anyways.

bora had a hard time being close to anyone in her family. she had a tendency of pretending to like her cousins or other family members just for the sake of keeping her ‘good girl’ reputation going. the only person in her family that she truly got along with was yooseung. the two shared secrets, had a similar sense of humor, and they even talked about how they both wanted to leave and live freely somewhere else. the latter happened for yooseung pretty soon, and he was away in california without taking bora with him. of course, she was upset about it at first, but she understood after a while. especially when he kept in contact and visited brooklyn sometimes.

behind her polished facade, bora had a plan, and she needed to get on with it as soon as she turned eighteen. she was sick of living like this. she had a lot of money saved up; courtesy of her parents giving her a few bills whenever she said she didn’t have any lunch money. she could admit that as the youngest child, she was a bit spoiled. her dad could barely say no if she pouted. and she was packing up her things slowly but surely, keeping her bags hidden away until the day came for her escape.

no one could’ve seen it coming. bora was seen as the family’s good girl who was always on her best behavior. she was even expected to start working in her family’s business after majoring in one of the best universities in new york. but when everyone woke up, she was nowhere to be found. her things and her car had disappeared as well. her mother insisted on filing her as missing, but nothing could be done, because she was technically an adult now, and it was evident that she deliberately left on her own.

a few months of driving from city to city, staying with friends and random motels here and there, she finally made her way to san verto, california, where her brother, yooseung, lived. he had no idea she was even coming here, only knowing about her disappearing from home. and since her arrival in town, she never thought she wanted to go live somewhere else. she was used to living in a big city, but she loved the small town.

hcs !

bora is a good actress. she could lie to you for her own gain, and a lot of the time people didn’t even realize it.

she studies astrophysics, after yooseung decided to pay for her college education, which she didn’t like the idea of at first.

bora’s definitely the smarter one out of the two siblings LMAO. compared to yooseung, she loved reading and educating herself about new things she was interested in. she’s currently volunteering at the library in her free time.

speaking of yooseung and lying... this bitch would support any ridiculous lies he was spewing.

you’ll never catch her slipping! she always wants to look good, even without any makeup on.

she KNOWS she looks good

she’s into astrology, and definitely owns a tarot deck. only because she wanted to learn how to use it, but doesn’t think she could ever use it seriously. she’s lowkey into witchy things.

the name bora means purple , and you could only imagine how much she loves the color. her wardrobe consists of a lot of lilacs.

bora started a youtube channel out of boredom, and now posts random videos every week or so. think kennedy walsh type of videos lol

always seems like she doesn’t have time for anyone’s shit, and... yeah she doesn’t lol

she’s a bit cold and opinionated, and can hold grudges, but for the most part, she’s pretty chill and doesn’t give a fuck about a lot of things.

has a soft spot for shyer/quieter ppl :(

she’d most likely get mad if anyone touched her stuff or walked into her room without permission lol

connections !

roomies: nico and eunmi

exes? i love me some good spicy sad plots. maybe someone who broke her heart and she hates their guts now

neighbors ? someone who probably complained about how loud bora’s music is at night lool

idk give me friends ? ppl who see her working at the library perhaps, or maybe ppl from uni? she goes to evergreen

it would be funny if there was a character who works at the coffee shop and they know her long ass coffee order by heart. or they hear it for the first time and are like ????? can u rewind , damn

someone she tutors! she’s p good at stuff like science and math subjects, and she wouldn’t mind teaching someone if they pay her lol

i feel like im missing some things.... but this is what i got for now. i’ll probably add more later.

here’s bora’s pinterest if u wanna take a look.

pls message me for any plots :D

#foolsintro #intro #im so exciteddd

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onelungmcclung · 4 years ago

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im sorry if you've answered this before im relatively new to the ship hehe but-- how'd mcclung fall for toye? was it in bastogne? before bastogne? in holland? in aldbourne? after the war? what were the circumstances? when did he realize it? and after he'd overcome that high of finding out he's in love, how did he deal with the aftermath once it started to settle in? hehe, i hope this week isnt as rough on you as you're anticipating. sending you much love and strength and calm vibes.

💜💜💜

ok, firstly, I have not been asked this before; secondly, even if I had no earthly power would stop me from answering it again; and thirdly, obviously no pressure but pls consider coming off anon and being my tumblr friend

probably everyone is new to this ship lmao

so, I started writing a (probably long) mctoye fic starting in fort bragg or aldbourne and continuing to postwar (enablers always welcome). but for the purposes of this ask, I’m mostly going off character insights revealed to me developed over the course of writing the ask him to dance universe.

(counterpart to this ask: toye noticing/falling for mcclung)

essentially: mcclung is/would be kind of theoretically ok with the idea of falling for a guy, if it had occurred to him he might fall for anyone right now, but falling for anyone is — for the time being — a concept he has strategically compartmentalised out of his entire thought process. (please clap.)

maybe he’s relatively ok with the possibility falling for a guy because he did not really grow up with white conservatism the way most of the easy co guys did; he’s always been aware of it, and his worldview is not informed by it in the same way. his family is arrow lakes/settler and he has friends & acquaintances among the other confederated tribes. and though he doesn’t take a strong interest in domestic/international politics, he has a more critical attitude towards the us govt and its laws (he’s still quietly angry about the grand coulee dam, constructed during his childhood). he’s never really considered that he might be into men; he likes women and he’s always assumed, without thinking much about it, that he’ll get married at some point; but he’s not particularly homophobic, outwardly or inwardly.

he’s not thinking much about these things when the war comes. he gets drafted into the army, thinks “not with these fucking clowns” and besides the airborne pay is better, and volunteers as a paratrooper. he joins up with easy after he’s completed his jump training.

he is excellent at training, naturally; he’s spent days at a time alone, fishing and hunting, since he was a child. he’s an exceptional sniper and scout. he’s confident in his own abilities. some of the toccoa guys initially assume he won’t be as skilled as them because he didn’t have their training, but in fact he has a headstart on most of them; and he knows it. (if he knew it any better it would probably come off as arrogance, but he’s just very clear on what he’s good at. and if he wasn’t beforehand, the airborne has proved it, to him & everyone else.)

he recognises, of course, that toye is an excellent soldier too (not as good a shot as himself or shifty, but overall one of the best paratroopers in the company), and they’re in the same platoon, so that helps. he never really gets afraid, not while training and not in combat; he just keeps his focus and gets on with it. for the most part, he doesn’t form close friendships until they get into combat.

he has some instinct towards helping and protecting others, but once they’re in a combat zone he realises that’s going to hurt him a lot. while they’re training, he helps some of the guys make their shots by shooting the targets for them; but after they jump into normandy, he avoids befriending the replacements because so many of them are killed early on. it’s — a little — easier that way.

he and toye don’t become close friends before bastogne, but they get familiar with each other’s combat style, and they’re comfortable working together. they trust each other; they’re both good soldiers, and toye is a good nco.

and then of course in bastogne they share a foxhole, and that is (I think for all the other characters as well) an incredibly vital, pivotal relationship. he and toye rely on each other entirely; without that, they’d probably die. they learn each other backwards; there’s no possibility of pretence. he knows what toye’s flaws are (stubbornness, prickliness, a reluctance to accept help), but there’s a lot more about him that mcclung likes, trusts and admires (not that he’d say so), and he knows those things are genuine.

he does his level best to stop toye from developing trench foot when he loses his boots. sure, he pretty much calls toye an idiot for getting into this situation and for refusing to tell the medics, but he does everything he can think of. it hasn’t occurred to him that he cares deeply about toye; it just seems inevitable.

(and he tells smokey to let the medics know. he doesn’t tell toye he’s told smokey, because it’s funnier this way. like everyone else, he’s starved for entertainment.)

but toye gets hit, and they’ve spent months beside each other — sleeping in shifts, keeping each other safe, trying to keep each other warm, kvetching, arguing with each other; he’s put up with toye’s singing and toye’s put up with mcclung talking to himself. a synchronicity and interdependence has developed between them, throughout the war but particularly in bastogne, to the point where it’s almost telepathic. he doesn’t consider what a powerful kind of intimacy this is, both physical and psychological, until it’s gone.

toye gets hit, and mcclung loses him. toye gets hit, and mcclung is blindsided by the enormity of it. you can’t take anyone’s survival for granted, he’s always tried to be careful of that, but losing toye is like losing part of himself.

he’s pretty determinedly unsentimental about everything: he’s not going to fall in love with anyone while he’s fighting a war, and he’s not going to dwell on situations beyond his control, and he’s not going to let himself be distracted by worrying about someone who isn’t here anymore. or at least that’s the attitude he’s internalised, and he takes it so much for granted that he never even considers that he could have fallen for anyone: right here, right now.

but he can’t forget anything that’s happened, even if he’d like to, and there’s no other friendship that can quite replace what had developed between toye and himself. bastogne was when things were at their worst, and toye is the one with whom he survived the worst. without toye, he feels an inescapable sense of wrongness, unevenness.

he’s half aware that he misses joe. he tries not to acknowledge that to himself, because that would mean acknowledging that he may not have any chance to see joe again, that one or both of them may not survive. that’s a line of thought he keeps away from altogether; it’s there, but he won’t look at it.

he knows it’s not his fault toye was injured. sometimes it has nothing to do with being a good soldier; sometimes it’s just luck and timing; he’s nearly been hit himself. he knows that, but deep down inside he wonders if he could have saved joe, by making sure he was in their foxhole before the shelling started. he heard toye and second-guessed himself. he stayed where he was. he thinks he probably did the sensible thing. he still feels guilty about it.

(sidenote: the glaring exception to his “don’t befriend the replacements” rule ends up being babe. after toye, guarnere & compton are taken off the line, he and babe start sharing a foxhole. possibly he could have found someone else, but his protective instinct resurfaces and maybe it helps to take his mind off missing toye. it’s a friendship that comes out of grief and loss.)

he gets through foy, and haguenau, and he focuses on the situation at hand and he doesn’t think about toye.

when they reach austria, mcclung is ordered to hunt animals to feed landsberg’s prisoners, and so he sets up camp alone in the woods. it’s beautiful; it’s peaceful; it’s the first time he’s been truly alone in two years. it’s the first time his mind is able to relax, and the memories come back — prewar life, everything he’s been through since, bastogne, toye — and the thoughts of the future, what he might do after the war.

he’d like to see toye again.

he still hasn’t thought that maybe he has feelings for joe.

and then the war ends, and he has the freedom to decide what to do next. he returns to england, and then ships back to the us. the memory/loss of toye is still a weight on him, and so he tracks toye down and goes to see him. that’s the obvious, logical course of action.

it’s also making him much more nervous than it has any right to.

(for the past year and a half, he’s been compartmentalising very hard because he intuitively understood that as the best way to survive the war. he learnt it early on, and it’s hard to let go of it. he’s convinced he’s handling everything great, very matter of fact and pragmatic, getting the job done, no emotional baggage here, etc etc. this is... not 100% true, but a coping mechanism is a coping mechanism is a coping mechanism. he is doing pretty well; nobody thinks he’s not; so obviously that counts as a roaring success.

but once the war is over, the psychological walls he’s maintained throughout combat — between survival and emotion — begin gradually to disintegrate. he has to let himself become whole again, learn to navigate who he is now, accept that the war has scarred him. he still feels himself to be one of the lucky ones. some of the things he’s been avoiding hit harder than others, and he can’t control that anymore.

insofar as he’s aware of these developments, he considers it extremely unfair.)

but, ensuing stupid panic or no ensuing stupid panic, he commits to meeting up with toye. he figures they’ll catch up, maybe keep in contact, that now he’ll be able to stop wondering how toye’s doing, stop this strange off-balance feeling he’s had since toye got hit.

seeing toye again is actually a lot more than he’d ever anticipated, and he’s forced to acknowledge that maybe there’s more going on here than he’d figured.

he realises he’s attracted to this guy, and he doesn’t know when that started: probably in bastogne, but maybe earlier. it feels new but not new; if he hadn’t pointedly avoided thinking about joe after foy, maybe he’d have figured it out sooner. if they’d made it through the war together, maybe something would have happened between them in europe, but they lost each other too soon for him to know. he’s a little discomfited by these feelings suddenly creeping up on him, but he’s trying hard not to let any of it show: not the attraction, not the unease.

he reasons that his feelings are only a problem if toye doesn’t share them. he thinks he could deal with that, but he is afraid they may not have a friendship anymore, that it was left behind in wartime.

he tells himself he’s not afraid of rejection. but he is. he doesn’t like feeling vulnerable, and suddenly he is.

when he thinks there’s a chance the attraction is mutual, he takes it. it works out for him. they stay together. he accepts that he’s falling in love and he lets it happen.

he falls in love with joe’s courage and honesty and selflessness, and he finds it incredibly hard to actually say that. (this is someone who considers “hanging out with you voluntarily” to be a love language.) he’s moved just by the fact joe wants to be with him, that he’s able to acknowledge that attraction and act on it despite his provincial catholic upbringing lol. he knows that joe’s recovery has been difficult, and he sees how joe is dealing with it, and, like in bastogne, he tries to support him as quietly and simply as possible.

he finds it hard to tell joe he loves him, but he pays attention to what joe does and says, and does whatever he can to make his life better. he never thinks joe needs him there, and he wouldn’t want it that way. he helps joe to adapt their old calisthenics training; they take roadtrips together. they’re still deeply protective of each other, and they still express it via touch, practical acts, and snark. they don’t struggle with physical affection as much as either of them might have worried; they’re a little hesitant at first, but it falls into place.

they’re fumbling their way a little, but they respect each other completely and unconditionally, and they’re kind and careful, and their relationship gets stronger as it goes on.

and they dance together.

#thank you for the good wishes <33 #toye x mcclung #mctoye #earl mcclung #joe toye #replies #'charactering'#long post under the cut bc I love going All Out and uh. also this ship #fine to reblog btw #writing manifesto: all characters are idiots in their own way

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vampiremourning · 4 years ago

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game/set

no ao3 link, the rest is under the cut. warnings for Adult Stuff that im not gonna tag bc i actually want people to see the post lmao

Sleeping with the boss is always less-than-a-good idea, in Bull's mind.

Not that she was technically his boss while they were still at Haven. It was more of an affectionate nickname, really--one that she'd pointed out made her feel strange to hear after he'd had his mouth between her legs for the third time that week.

Which was, he supposed, fair enough. She never struck his as the type who liked that kind of deference in bed anyway.

It was a working relationship and a professional friendship, nothing more or less. The fact that their physical compatibility seemed to match the way they fell in step together on the battlefield was merely an added bonus to the whole arrangement.

Isen was pretty, smart as a whip, had a filthy tongue when she wanted, and kept her body limber specifically for the purpose of enjoyable sex. An excellent fuck, all in all, and not something he could bring himself to easily regret even if the emotions got a bit muddied from time to time.

That bit was easy enough to ignore when she insisted he keep his hands otherwise occupied.

"Hey," he cuts the post-coital silence of the Inquisitor's quarters. "Don't think all that made me forget that you never answered my question earlier."

Isen hums from her perch on the edge of the bed, wiping herself down with a warm washcloth. Such a paradox that was--he'd been all over her moments ago, yet the act of cleaning up was where the line of intimacy was drawn.

"What question?" The reply is deliberately distracted.

Isen was all of those wonderful things off the list he kept tucked away in his head, but she was also stubborn and evasive in some of the most irritating ways.

He'd never really been able to back down from that sort of challenge.

"You know exactly what I mean," Bull says as he keeps his gaze trained on the curve of her spine. "Before the clothes came off--why did you want to get at me so bad back in Haven? Don't get me wrong, I know I'm good-looking and all, but you'd think you'd have gone for someone more like Cullen or something. I dunno."

She scoffs and turns her head just enough to make eye contact. "Cullen? Please. I'd eat him alive before he would even manage to fumble the laces on my trousers, and he knows it. Handsome by most standards, sure, but my own personal tastes..."

Isen pauses, giving him an open, suggestive leer, and Bull becomes instantly aware in that second that he'd be spending a good few more hours in this bed. He makes peace with it almost instantly.

"Well," she chuckles, turning back. "They've always been a bit more, mm, substantial, you might say."

"Substantial," he echoes, nudging her with his foot. "And that means what, exactly?"

"I'm attracted to power," she says simply with a shrug, feet finally hitting the floor so she could place the cloth back on the nightstand. "And I'm extra attracted to power that's attracted to me."

The last word is accompanied by an electric, hungry look in her eyes. It's the sort of look that sends a tendril of desire snaking down his spine and pooling in his gut.

"Not the answer you expected?" She asked, taking note of the lack of witty reply. When she sits on the bed this time, she's closer to his chest.

"Not really," he admitted. "Not the weirdest thing I've ever heard. I was thinking it was something more like 'I like tall guys.' That's pretty standard."

"That's a part of it," she replied. "Then again, most people have a decent amount of height on me. It's not exactly difficult to find in a person."

Bull made a noise of acknowledgement in his throat, opting to trail a hand over one of her naked thighs. A light scraping of nails caused a delightful trail of gooseflesh in its wake.

"You don't think you fit into that category?"

"Depends on how you're defining the word."

"Ah," she said, moving once more across the bed. This time, she's settling on his torso. A familiar angle, and a damn good-looking one too. "Well, I suppose that does vary, depending on the context, yes. Remove my magic from the equation--how much do you think it would take for you to overpower me?"

Her voice is low and beguiling, each syllable possessing an undercurrent of undisguised want.

Bull places his hands on her body--one on the waist, one on the hips--and not for the first time, he's aware of how breakable a body like that is.

"No magic?" He asks, only continuing once she inclined her head in affirmation. "Not much, if that's the case." It's an honest assessment. She's small and sinewy, built for light work at first glance. Bull's body is built for strength, through and through.

They're complimentary, but on a purely physical level, entirely unmatched.

"Exactly. Hence--I'm attracted to power, I'm attracted to you, I enjoy sleeping with people I find attractive. It's a simple succession of events."

She dips down after that to kiss him, hard and slow, allowing them both to indulge in wandering hands.

"And the second half?" He asked against her mouth.

"Second h--oh, the bit where I like it when power is attracted to me?"

"That'd be the one."

Bull pushes off the bed, moving into a sitting position. It's easier to add to the collection of bite-marks along her neck this way.

"Knowing you," he continues, grazing his tongue along a quickening pulse line, "it's not gonna be something simple like 'I'm into domination,' is it?"

Her laugh is breathy when he sinks his teeth down into flesh, and she digs her nails into his shoulders in kind.

"Well, at the base, probably. But for a more--ah!--intricate explanation, I get off on the mutual exchange. The struggle. Being able to meet someone as an equal, or fight for it--whichever ends up winning out. But yes," she sighs, courteously tilting her head back, "sometimes it's just nice to be the unexpectedly strong one in these exchanges."

"So not just having the world at your feet?" A nip at the jaw, then a steady descent down to her chest. "Some sort of psychological mind game-shit to make it more exciting?"

"Only with myself." She suppresses a groan. "Self-serving. Ego-stroking. Simple vanity. A subheading of masturbation. Call it what you will."

His teeth find a nipple, and she jolts in response. All of that cleaning with the washcloth is proving to be nothing more than a waste of time. Ah well. He enjoyed the show while it lasted.

"Be honest, Bull--" said between heavy breaths, "--if you didn't think I could take care of myself, you wouldn't be here."

"That so?"

"Completely." Both of her hands on the side of his face, dragging him away from his focus on her chest. This kiss is more demanding, the force of it going right down to his cock.

"You might have the physical upper hand." Her smile is full of wicked promise against his skin as she reaches down between her own legs for a bit of preparatory work, still loose and slick from before. "No argument from this corner, but let's put the magic back into the context. All of the sudden, there's no clear winner anymore. Evenly matched. Anyone's game."

She moves her face away from his and locks eyes with him as she sinks down into his lap and begins to build up momentum. A gaze full of steel and challenge, clouded with lust and affection. It's a strange mix.

Fitting. They're a strange pair.

"That's what I get off on," she says with a hiss of pleasure as she begins to move. "And do you know--do you have any idea how difficult that is to find?"

He bends forward and bites down on her shoulder, the one with the scars. "Gonna tell me anyway," he murmurs, confident that his fingers will also leave their mark on her hips.

"Impossible," she says hoarsely. "Or damn near it. Someone's always holding back, and even if nothing comes of it, it's different. Intoxicating. Wholly addictive."

"Sounds like this isn't your first time in that position," he grunts when she kicks up the pace.

"I've only been here enough times to realize I'm completely weak to it. Not even remotely often enough for my satisfaction." Until now goes unspoken. The silent phrase is loaded in a way he isn't sure he wants to confront yet.

"Even though it compromises you?"

"The vulnerability is part of the excitement. It's not equal if that part's not there."

Isen's ability to hold a conversation while getting fucked good and proper is nothing short of impressive.

Bull expertly maneuvers her onto her back and looms atop of her with only minimal contact lost. He's pointedly aware of the fact that the only reason it was so easy is because she permit it to be. But he could fight for it, if the resistance was there. He could meet her halfway.

He was starting to understand what it was she was getting at.

"What's the difference, between getting hor for power or danger? Your definition makes it almost interchangeable," he points out, spreading her legs.

"At first glance," she agrees, regarding him with a thin veneer of patience as he settles between them. "Danger implies that the exchange of power is nothing more than an illusion. Let me ask you this; are either of us considered a danger to the other person?"

"Yes," he says with a groan, beginning to thrust, "and no. Depends on where the chips fall. Who gets the upper hand first. Who gets luckier."

"Exactly."

She is prey and predator all at once, wrapped up into a deceptively neat little package. He's more of the same--hunter and hunted, falling in and our of both categories with a fluidity that came so naturally you'd think it was innate.

Sleeping with your boss is, generally, a not-very-good idea.

Bull followed her once, months ago, and would do so over and over again to experience this dance once more. She was right. It was a nearly indescribable, ultimately bewitching feeling.

"You sure you never did any blood magic with me?" He asks after they've collapsed. "Didn't slip into my head and tie me to your will somehow?"

She's letting him clean her this time--she wants to be lazy and languid, and having him do the dirty work is the best way to indulge the feeling.

She grins. It's lacking the same sharpness from before, but full of contradictions nonetheless.

"Nothing like that, but I did sleep with you, and I'm told that it has basically the same effect on people. You might want to consider that."

"You weren't kidding about the ego thing from earlier, huh?" He asks with a dry chuckle.

"It's not unfounded. You do keep coming back, and with very little effort from me, might I add."

Well. She had him there.

"Besides," she says, stretching her arms over her head luxuriously. "I could accuse you of the same. Putting me under a ritual, slipping a cursed amulet into my pocket--it doesn't take much in the way of persuading from you to get my clothes off, you know."

"I'd say you had a point, but that's not the kind of crap I dabble in. Maybe I am really just that good."

Another grin. "Who's the vain one now?"

He wants to kiss her then, but the air has shifted. It's still easy and comfortable, but the time for demanding teeth and tongues has passed, and he's not sure there's room for anything else. Full of contradictions though the relationship might be, he has yet to see one that would leave a place for that sort of thing.

"You're the one who admitted to it, not me."

"Right. As if we're not simply mirroring back our own qualities ninety-nine percent of the time we're alone anyway."

The back-and-forth continues well on after they're both dressed and he's departed for his own quarters.

A game of contradictions, and one he's not sure he'll every have completely mapped out. How frustrating. How risky.

How wonderful it will be, to play until the winner is decided.

#dragon age #dragon age inquisition #iron bull #bullavellan #oc tag #isenril lavellan #fic tag #wherever you Think this fic is going it probably isnt dsfdgfhgm

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solasan · 4 years ago

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otp tag.

tagged by @masonsfreckles and @impossible-rat-babies and like definitely also someone else but my activity is super clogged up so i cant find who I’m Sorry 🥺 but thank u remus and owen mwah tagging: @denerims @arlathen @lvllns @trvelyans @lavellane @chuckhansen @rosebarsoap @cheydinhaal @darksprawn @deepspeech @yennefre and anyone else who wants to do it tbh

DISAGREEMENTS.

who is more likely to raise their voice?

i mean both, probably? they’re both very passionate people

who threatens to leave but never actually does?

i’ll hesitantly say june but i dont think they’d reach that point

who actually keeps their word and leaves?

neither lmao

who trashes the house?

in day-to-day life, june; she’s very messy. in fights? neither bcos that’s messed up. the Most that’ll happen is adam cracking a piece of furniture in his fist by accident

do either of them get physical?

uhhh they’ll spar from time to time, but outside of that, never

how often do they argue/disagree?

in the beginning?? all the fucking time. every day. they butt heads like they were made to do it. further in, they argue much less, especially once june’s proved adam’s whole “humans are weak!!!” thing wrong

who is the first to apologize?

adam gets bullied into it by nate sometimes. june won’t apologise unless she’s absolutely certain she’s in the wrong, but it does happen. so i guess it depends on the argument

SEX.

who is on top? who is on bottom?

i hate applying the top/bottom thing to m/f ships but adam’s A Top i guess. june is 100% a bottom. but when it comes to actual positioning they’ll change; adam likes missionary a lot, but june likes sitting in his lap and riding him, so

any kinks?

adam is lowkey lowkey very lowkey into orgasm control/denial im calling it. he just likes taking control, but not in an explicit bdsm sense??? june’s into dirty talk and does have a praise kink. she has to coax adam into talking in the beginning but when he gets into the swing of things he loves it

june used to be into getting tied up, but the whole murphy situation kinda fucked that for her

who has the strangest desires?

june probably wins this just purely based on the fact that she wants adam to bite her lmao. he would find that strange. but he would also be into it so

who’s dominant in bed?

adam !!! again not in the traditional like bdsm dominant sense but he takes charge of things

is head ever in the equation?

uhhh, yeah ??? all the time

if so, who is better at performing it?

look. june is very good. she is. but adam has 900 years on her and also more enthusiasm / touch starvation / desperation. adam is a pussy eating KING

ever had sex in public?

the most public they’ve gotten is fucking in the tech lab at the warehouse, that’s it

who moans the most?

both moan, but june’s louder. she’s freer ??? with it ??? but adam grunts and gasps and pants a lot, and when he’s abt to come he’ll groan out her name or a french curse so

who leaves the most marks?

june’s the one that goes out of her way to make marks, just bcos shes a lil sad they fade so quickly. adam leaves the most just bcos june doesn’t heal in the same way

who is the more experienced of the two?

adam might be 900 years old but we all know he’s not had many relationships. june’s more experienced bcos she has one-night stands in college before her and bobby got together

do they ‘fuck’ or ‘make love’?

im so sorry but if u look at adam du mortain and think that he doesn’t make love 99% of the time, ur wrong. but sometimes they do get super passionate / desperate for each other, and then they’ll fuck

how long do they usually last?

in the beginning adam lasts like 2 seconds, no joke. that man sees even a hint of june’s coochie and he busts a nut. but further in he can last longer. unless june is being a shit and deliberately trying to get him to come, which she does do

rough or soft?

soft for the most part. if it ever is rough it’s like..... more bcos it’s intense, passionate, less bcos either of them is trying to make it rough. june has some sexual trauma too so really rough sex, like w choking for example, is out of the question (not that i think adam is into choking anyway)

is protection used?

it should be, and when they remember to they do use it. but also they forget a lot shdkshdkd does june look like the type of person to get pregnant on purpose??

does it ever get boring?

nah they keep it fresh. plus they love each other so much it’s just always so good to have each other ???? like after So Long Pining it’s just good idk bro shdjsjdk

where is the strangest place they’d have sex?

idk probably the tech lab like i said above ??? i dont think they fuck in many weird places — not bcos i dont think june would be into it, but more bcos i figure if they ever start getting freaky adam gets them into a bed / somewhere private STAT

FAMILY.

do they plan on having children / do they have children?

yeah they vaguely want them in the future i guess. adam thinks abt june having his baby and has to lie down he 🥺 so hard

if so, how many children do they want/have?

their first kid — emma — is an accident born like a year after they get married, and then oliver comes along a year after that because june always said she didn’t want only one kid. she remembered how lonely she was as a kid :(((

AFFECTION.

who likes to cuddle?

both of them !!! adam is touch-starved and june is starved for affection !!! they cuddle all the time

who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places?

june 100% no question. WHORE. adam is so done with her but he does always drag her off somewhere to Ravish her so rly who’s winning here

who struggles to keep their hands to themself?

shdkshdkskd both of them. june slightly more so tho

how long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable?

uhhh i dont think it’s rly a matter of one getting uncomfortable, bcos they do love it. probably it’s just as long as they can hold out before 1) june has to pee, or 2) adam resolves to be productive

what is their favourite non-sexual activity?

adam would never admit it but he loves watching movies with june purely bcos she gets so cuddly and ALSO she gets so into them. she’s the type of person to yell at the screen and ask questions all the time. sometimes they’ll compete to see who can work out the plot / twist / mystery of a film first

where is their favourite place to cuddle?

in bed !!!!! adam loves having her whole body pressed up against him, all small and soft and smelling like june, and june loves how he tucks her into his chest and makes her feel so safe and warm

SLEEPING.

who snores?

ahskhkdja june !!!

if both do, who snores the loudest?

adam doesn’t snore so june. but she doesn’t do it that loudly

do they share a bed or sleep separately?

they share a bed !!!! it’s adam’s way of making sure june does actually go to bed, for one, but also he doesn’t like to sleep without her

if they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart?

cozy up together !!!!! adam’ll kiss her hair and tuck her head under his chin, and june’ll wrap her arms around his torso and kiss the hollow of his throat

what do they wear to bed?

june wears raggedy old band tees or oversized hoodies, boxer shorts, lots of comfy clothes. flannel pyjama trousers. sometimes she’ll sleep in adam’s shirts bcos they smell like him and she likes that, but when she does sleep in adam’s shirts they uhhh haha dont sleep for a while ;)))

are either of them insomniacs?

june is !!! i think around book 4, maybe 5, someone’s gonna talk her into seeing someone abt it — because she really doesn’t sleep a healthy amount, i’m talking 5-8 hours a week — and she’ll start taking sleeping pills, but for now she just drinks a fuckload of coffee and keeps herself busy.

adam’s not rly an insomniac per se, but he doesn’t sleep as much as humans do, obviously

can sleeping pills be found by the bedside?

later in the series, yeah. i could see her being put on quetiapine bcos that’s what im on and that shit works

do they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side?

wrap their limbs around each other !!!! june’s like a cuddly octopus shdksjdl but adam loves it, honestly. he’ll often wrap his arms around her and put on of his hands up her shirt, over her spine, so he can have some nice skin-on-skin contact. yknow....... as a treat

who wakes up with bed hair?

both !!!! june’s is probably a bit worse bcos it’s longer ????

who wakes up first?

eh, depends. i’d say adam, bcos he’s More Responsible, but june really doesn’t sleep much, so it could go either way

who prepares breakfast in bed for the other?

neither ??? june doesn’t cook and adam’s not a good cook

what is their favourite sleeping position?

either adam on his back with june tucked into his chest, his arms around her, or both of them on their sides and adam spooning june. they love em !!!!

do they set an alarm each night?

they do. june has broken multiple alarm clocks, tho, so make of that what u will

who has nightmares?

both :((( june’s are more frequent, i think

can a television be found in their bedroom?

nah. adam wouldn’t want one, and june watches everything on her laptop

who has ridiculous dreams?

probably june. she’ll sleepily recount them to adam the next morning in bed and he’ll either hm? into her neck to show he’s listening or huff a laugh against her skin

who sprawls out and takes up most of the bed?

june. adam has learned to accept this fact about her. usually he’ll just position her so that they’re both comfier when she does it, but he has been woken by her elbowing his side before

who makes the bed?

adam. june cba with that shit. she’s just gonna get back in it anyways !!!!

what time is bed time?

adam pushes june to go to bed by 11. sorry u gotta take care of ur stupid energiser bunny girlfriend, buddy

any routines/rituals before bed?

eh nothing in particular i dont think ??? nothing out of the standard brush teeth / clean face / get into pjs thing anyway

who’s the grumpiest when they wake up?

june is the GRUMPIEST. she’s not a morning person in the slightest

WORK.

who is the busiest?

hmmmmm. they’re both probably equally busy ??? i mean adam’s the head of the unit so he probs has work he has to do, but then june’s basically the head of the department bcos the captain’s never around, so she has a lot of work. and she has to balance that work with the agency. maybe june’s slightly busier ???

who rakes in the highest income?

eh they’re probs around the same ???

are any of them unemployed?

nope

who takes the most sick days?

june bcos adam doesn’t get sick. also sometimes she just wants A Personal Day and / or is hungover

what are their jobs?

he’s a commanding agent, she’s a liaison and also police detective

who sucks up to their boss?

haha adam’s technically june’s boss and she loves to suck badum tss

who is more likely to turn up late to work?

june shdjshdk girl is Bad at time management. sometimes tho they’ll both be late bcos a morning fuck went on too long. june is very smug on these days

who stresses the most?

uhhh both stress a lot ?? june has anxiety. but adam also is constantly on edge so ????

do they enjoy or despise their careers/occupations?

yeah they enjoy them i guess. adam definitely enjoys his. june is..... complicated. she doesn’t trust the agency and she doesn’t rly wanna be a cop, but she doesn’t know what else she could do so ???

are they financially stable?

yeah for the most part. the agency has good salaries

HOME.

who does the washing?

i think maybe june does it more often just bcos as a human she....... probably ???? goes through more clothes ??? that makes sense to me ??? idk hsdk

who takes out the trash?

adam, usually. especially if it’s dark; june ain’t going nowhere at night

who does the ironing?

again, adam. just bcos he’s more likely to have clothes that need ironing. june has never touched an iron in her life

who does the cooking?

i mean june is notorious for not cooking but rather ordering takeout, so...... i mean i dont think adam is a bad cook but he can rly only cook rly bland, simple meals, and he obviously doesnt need to eat so. i guess if it’s one of them it’s june

who is more likely to burn the house down just trying?

yeah june sdhskdhksdk she just has a very short attention span bro idk what to tell u

who is messier?

yep june no question. adam’s a lil bit of a neat freak im calling it

who leaves the toilet roll empty?

neither

who leaves their dirty clothes on the floor?

yeah june. sometimes adam if he’s had a long day tho. or like if theyre getting Freaky and leaving clothes everywhere. but in general, june’s more likely

who forgets to flush the toilet?

ew gross people do that ?? neither

who loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere?

june shdjjsjdk

who answers the telephone?

uhh both ig ?? but they don’t have like a landline or anything they only have their cells

who mows the lawn?

adam, but only once they’ve moved out of june’s apartment after having the kids. june’s got a black thumb bro she’s not allowed near the garden on nate’s orders

who does the vacuuming?

both !!! they take turns

who does the groceries?

june 100% and she always ends up getting shit that wasn’t on the list shdjskdk. sometimes they’ll do it together tho

who takes the longest to shower?

uhhhh i mean. i think they shower together quite a lot so ???? both ???

who spends the most time in the bathroom?

like getting ready ???? uhh depends. if june’s doing makeup, her, but she doesn’t do it often

MISCELLANEOUS.

is money a problem?

nahhh the agency pays them well

how many cars do they own?

originally only june’s shitty little hatchback, but when the kids are born they get a second one. probably it is very pretty and fancy and expensive, because adam

what’s their song?

either dermot kennedy’s power over me, or fortress by bear’s den. like, seriously, look up the lyrics; they’re the ULTIMATE adamjune songs

do they live in the city or in the country?

does wayhaven count as a city, even if it’s like... a small town ??? idk

do they own their home or do they rent?

june’s renting her apartment currently, but when ollie and emma are born, they buy a place at the edge of town

do they enjoy their surroundings?

eh. neither of them are especially fond of wayhaven, but i think maybe it grows on them over time ??? june definitely in her current point in canon is only there bcos she doesn’t know where else to go

what do they do when they’re away from each other?

Yearn like fools. they miss each other shdjshdk they’ll call each other if adam is ever sent out on an assignment away from town or june has to take some kinda business trip. theyre always super happy to be reunited

where did they first meet?

at an abandoned warehouse in book 1. june shot him. it was great

who spends the most money when out shopping?

uhhhhhh bro i genuinely don’t know ??? adam and june both have terrible taste in clothes; he walks around in cargo pants half the time and she’s never not in something oversized and baggy and possibly falling apart ???

ig june spends a lot on technology ??? and on food ????

who’s more likely to flash their assets?

ok i mean adam has already in canon gotten shirtless and flashed his assets at june while convinced he feels nothing for her so. him. he’s a show-off we all know this

any mental issues?

yeah lmao. june already had ptsd before canon from being assaulted in college, and now it’s just worse bcos of everything with murphy and shit. she also has depression, because obviously, and anxiety. also adhd if that counts ??? it probably counts

i think adam’s got some ptsd too from that Terrible Fiery Scene Of Death we saw in the mirror from his past, and probably that’s compounded by experiences since he became a vampire too ??? possibly some depression as well just bcos i’m now considering his whole ‘numb for years’ thing and how that overlaps with depression ?? :/// idk

who finds it amusing when the other trips over?

adam doesn’t trip often but when he does june howls with laughter. usually if he’s tripping it’s bcos she’s done something Very Distracting. one time she took her shirt off in their living room when he wasnt expecting it and he walked into a wall

when june trips (which she often does) adam will sorta snort very quietly or his lips will twitch but he’ll always stabilise her quickly

who’s terrified of bugs?

yep june 100%

who kills the spiders around the house?

shsjdhskdjk ADAM. “june, it’s just an insect.” “um, untrue, it’s an arachnid, those are different fucking things—” “it’s miniscule. even more so than you are.” “okay, ha, ha, very funny, please kill it, adam i’m serious, kill it, it has eight legs, it’s waiting to murder me, fucking kill it!” “i’m killing it, calm down.”

do they have any fears for their future?

yeah. june’s worried she’s gonna get totally murdered lmao bcos odds are someone’s gonna try again. adam is also terrified abt this distinct possibility. he’s also scared that, like... she’ll live ??? as in ??? she won’t ever turn, she’ll stay mortal her whole life, and after waiting 900 years for her, he’ll only get a few decades with her before she dies.

that’s like not gonna happen she absolutely becomes a vampire after emma and ollie are born but still. he’s dramatic

their favourite place?

the warehouse, probably ??? it’s safe and secure and it’s comfortable ??? or else june’s apartment. i think june prefers her apartment just slightly

who’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner?

adam ??? but it’s more likely that they’d go out to a fancy dinner, rather than him cook one

who pays the bills?

they split them

who’s the tallest?

sndjhskdjkd adam. june hates and loves this fact in equal measure. adam is very smug abt how teeny tiny his girlfriend is shdkshdk he finds it very funny. also very sweet he loves it

who’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other?

both, honestly. theyre bad at keeping their hands off each other once they’re together. maybe june is ever so slightly more likely ?? idk

who wanders around in their underwear?

both. adam likes to distract june w his abs bro what can i say. june just is most comfortable walking around in a sports bra and briefs

who sings the loudest when singing along to the radio?

june !!! and she’ll lean into his face and sing right at him with this big dumb grin too. adam will refuse to make eye contact but he’ll have this tiny lil smile on his face

what do they tease each other about?

everything. june roasts adam on the daily. adam will very dryly retort back every time. they were made for each other im telling u.

june will sometimes bring up his whole humans are weak thing at the most ridiculous times. like, adam tries to get her to get out of bed in the morning and she’ll groan and start lamenting how weak and fragile she is, she couldn’t possibly get out of bed in this state, adam, i have glass bones and paper skin, don’t u love me ????

adam’s teasing is just dryly taking the piss out of dumb shit she says. she’ll talk abt a fight she had with someone and say she went “wa-pow!” when she hit them and he’ll just deadpan repeat, “wa-pow.” his face totally straight. i wuv themm

who is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times?

i mean neither they both have bad fashion taste. but also june hates the fucking cargo pants bruh

who crushed first?

adam did shdkshdk even if he didn’t realise. june didn’t figure out she liked him until the time between book 1 and book 2, because she missed him and she couldn’t figure out why

any alcohol or substance related problems?

uhhh no not rly. june has a history of using recreational drugs but that was in college and she doesn’t touch most of that shit these days

who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am?

june probably shdjshdk she’ll have a girl’s night with farah, morgan, and tina, and just come home absolutely fucking twatted. adam always tucks her in

who swears the most?

yeah june. she swears in every other word. the first time she made adam curse is burned into her brain seriously she takes such pride in it

#bruh this meme is so fucking long i gotta go lie down ashsjdghjsjdk #as always im sorry if i forgot someone !!!! i do that a lot #pls do it anyway and say i tagged u #tag games #ch: june lovelace

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pcssessicn · 4 years ago

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☆ . · . miguel bernardeau, twenty-one, male, he / him . · . ☆ fitzwilliam 'fitz' phénix-alvarez lives in that huge mansion over there! no, not that one. look for white stucco walls & terracotta shingles and that’ll be it. the nhl defenseman has offered occasional glimpses of soft yellow walls and an impressive collection of plants in the background of social media posts, but all of that is nothing compared to seeing the opulence in person. they’ve remained protective as ever since moving to tercet court two months ago, but it seems like they might’ve gotten a little more mistrustful too. maybe that’s why they’re rumored to have such a distant relationship with everyone else who lives on this street. ☆ . · . ooc info: ollie, they / them, 21, est . · . ☆ career claim: cale ma/kar.

BASICS

Full name: Fitzwilliam Phénix-Alvarez Nickname: Fitz Birth date: September 29th Languages: English, Spanish, Quebecois Francois Hometown:

PHYSICAL

Age: 21 Weight: 196 lbs Height: 6′2″ Body build: athletic, lean Eye color: grey-blue Faceclaim: Miguel Bernardeau Glasses or contacts: neither

Tattoos: a raven in flight over his left shoulder blade, monochromatic vines winding up his left bicep

Scars: most predominantly a thin scar near the base of his neck where a skate slashed him when he was fourteen ; several other smaller scars of less note, especially on his hands --- much less noticeable

PERSONALITY

Good personality traits: observant, calculating, protective Bad personality traits: mistrustful, dishonest, aggressive

Fitz comes across as very confident and in control, and at ease in his skin. The truth couldn’t be farther from it. He works hard to put forward the easy front he does --- and some days he can’t tell which one is more real. He has a dishonest smile that masquerades as honest, and a tendency to manipulate those around him when necessary to shed suspicion off himself. He can be almost charming at times, at least extremely amiable. Despite all this, Fitz is not rash or impulsive -- in fact everything he does is carefully calculated, though he goes to great lengths so it does not come across as so. The one place he feels truly effortless is on the ice.

He finds it hard to truly allow people close to him and to really see beyond the most superficial layers of himself. Furthermore, there is a deep-seated fear of not being enough and being forgotten ; he finds it easier to not let anyone close so there’s less chance of this happening.

THE STORY ( i rly was gunna try to write this nice and eloquently but... u get this instead 😔 )

— fitz was born to up and coming spanish actress reyna alvarez in chicago. the result of a messy one-night stand, but reyna ultimately decided to keep the baby. he is indeed named after fitzwilliam darcy from pride and prejudice bc his mother’s first breakout role was in a film adaptation of the book and she loved the book after reading it. how unfortunate for him.

— his birth father was never in the picture, but the man he would come to know as his father came into the picture a year or so after his birth. already one of the top architects in north america, paul robert phenix was in chicago for a conference and he and reyna fell in love. fitz has been told it’s was all very romantic. so then the happy family moved to pittsburgh where his father’s architecture firm was based.

— despite growing up with two parents who raked in a fair amount of cash, they made sure nothing was just given to fitz. they’d both had their humble beginnings and big believers in tough love, they made sure not to spoil their son. they did however make sure he was sheltered from the media when it poked around and the two things they did pay for without question were his education and sports.

— he started playing hockey when he was six after seeing a pens game on tv while they were out at dinner and knowing he just had to do it --- and never stopped. he got recruited to the us national team development program when he was sixteen and spent his last two years of high school in michigan living with a billet family most do who are with the program, which gave him a huge sense of “normalcy.” but really he was far from normal, his development taking great steps over those two years leading up to his draft year.

— queue the cale ma/kar career claim lads aka all the hockey development & logistics u can probably skip if u don’t care laksdjf:

one year before graduation and a draft, he vocally committed to playing at university of massachusetts - amherst. he went fourth overall to the la kings in the 2017 draft ( yeah technically irl that pick belonged to the avs but sh ), and proceeded to remain loyal to his commitment and play two years at umass despite his new top five prospect status. he was put into a first pair role from the start of his freshman year ( 2017-18 ), was a huge part in bringing the umass team up from the bottom of the standings. he plays for team usa in world juniors 2017 and 2018.

his sophomore year ( 2018-19 ), they make it all the way to the frozen four. fitz gets announced as the hobey baker winner and the day after they get knocked out of the tournament. not long after that he signs his entry contract with the kings and finishes out the season with them. he scores his first nhl goal on his first shot in game 3 of the first round of playoffs irl the kings don’t make playoffs but again shh. they get knocked out in the first round and fitz goes home and trains harder than ever.

he come back to kings training camp the next season ( 2019-20 ) more determined than ever to make the team. he does so out of camp and has an incredible rookie campaign. he gets injured in december and misses a few games but is back mid-january. fitz is given the calder ( award that goes to the best rookie in the nhl ) at the end of the season. technically cale hasn’t won this yet but we all know he will.

— la is a bustling city and fitz is a fan of one night stands : he just doesn’t feel like he has time for a relationship and hookups scratch that itch. he’s not an asshole about it, really. there is typically that understanding that this is a one time, no strings attached thing. but this one girl he sleeps with in march obviously does not get this memo and continues to not get the memo. she starts seriously stalking him in the following months and eventually he gets a restraining order against her ( use ur imagination kids ). he’s not really comfortable staying in his own apartment downtown for the time being though after he still sees her around. he stays with a teammate until the season ends, which then brings us to his connection to tercet court.

— paul robert phenix, now world reknowned architect, had a hand in designing several of the homes on tercet court, including one in the style of old money spanish mediterrianian villas that he designed with his wife in mind to be their new home. fitz’s mother had loved the house and moved in for a few years after the court opened but with her taking fewer roles up in the movie industry and getting exceedingly more lonely, she decided to embrace the more nomadic livestyle of her husband and moved out about a year and a half ago. since then the home stood vacant ( though certainly still cared for by several paid landscapers and maids ) until fitz’s dilemma arose a few months ago.

— a few phone calls and a begrudging agreement to pay the extremely steep taxes on the place for the year ( again, tough love and fitz may be a pro-athlete but he’s still making less than a million a year with his entry level contract ), and fitz moved in about two months ago ( say mid-may ).

MISC

— tri-lingual. father is french-canadian and his mother is spanish. needless to say he grew up a little confused. that worked itself out soon enough though. uses he uses quebois french in-season kind of frequently to talk to a couple teammates. really only uses his spanish to talk to his mother and family.

— since moving in fitz has filled the mansion with plants. he absolutely does not seem like a plant guy but he is... absolutely loves it. his major at umass was kinesology bc he thought it would be the most helpful and knew he wasn’t going to graduate but he snuck in some out-of-major classes on horticulture. truly just likes plants a lot. they don’t judge him.

— probably set up his own puck shooting pad in the backyard. why not there’s enough space. he had to retrieve a couple pucks from the bottom of the pool though which has been good incentive to not miss the net lmao. he also has revamped one of the rooms in the house to have synthetic ice.

— runs in the morning before it gets hot. skates a few days of the week in the afternoon. home gym in the house is definitely a perk but he prefers to work out with others because it feels more productive.

— probably drives like. a range rover.

— offensive defenseman. likes to jump up in the rush and is good at break out passes as well as zone entry. earned his place quarterbacking the first powerplay towards the end of the season. he can be quite physical when he needs to be though and don’t ever go after his goalie. ( his nhl.com player page )

— he’s not a recluse by any means, but he has no desire to built connections in tercet court so probably hasn’t actively reached out. they’re likely to have met outside of the small community or if your character forcibly came and introduced themselves. or if they knew each other already mayhaps??

— oh and he’s bi. like really really bi. obv not advertised given his career path but he’s not having some crisis over it either. it just is. probably has a stack of nda’s next to the condoms ready to go at anytime alsdkfj.

OOC

hey lads. i’m ollie !! for those around for round 1.0 of this rp i played alya ( the sports photog ). i am back and this time going back to what i do best : playing hockey boys 😔😔😔.

#linksintro #( this is..............#not my best work lads )#( but alas )

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lavenderglassgirl · 5 years ago

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749 pm tues dec 10

I was thinking about self harming this evening, considering it. Considering what i could do in lieu of it. Thinking about my parents. It reminded me of something

I remember when my mom found all my cutting supplies one time she searched my room. I had a bag full of blood soaked paper towels and my journal with the blade i used taped inside. My mom found the bag and asked me what i used to cut with. I showed her the blade, and she got so mad because it was rusted. I got a lecture because it could have killed me. I went to therapy and I don’t think i got grounded, i may have already been grounded at this point too I don’t recall. THis was sometime in middle school so chances were high that i was. But regardless, I didn’t get into any more trouble for this, yet I remember feeling like i was. I remember feeling like my parents were angry at me, they didn’t trust me, they were ashamed of me, they felt i was being over dramatic, just an emotional teenager.

I was talking to Scott today, NPD fresh on my mind from some research for Jesse (will get to that aha) and i went over my lack of privacy. They read my diary when i was 16, brought it to my while i was in the hospital for suicidal ideation. As part of the leaving process for this facility which i was desperately trying to leave (nothing spurs your will to live than prison- er mental health facilities) I was told that i had a session with my therapist (who i had had one 30 minute conversation with) and my parents, whom she had advised per program protocol to search my room. So they searched. They pulled out the half smoked blunt and i got some generic mark lecture about drugs and his house and this that and the other, and words from Laura regarding how it impaires your brain growth and depression and blah blah. Of course what they didn’t bring up was that after this session they would both go home to smoke it off while i went back to my plastic cot where i was allowed to keep a book and my blanket and a pillow from home. After i spent Christmas surrounded by strangers who treated me kinder than my parents in a place that felt like a prison.

And they read my journal. They pulled quotes like it was fucking Shakespeare- we don’t understand why you hate him so much, we don’t understand, we think youre using this as a way to make yourself more upset, we think this is too triggering, were not giving it back.

They kept my diary. My mom had it in the back of her drawer for a long time before i had the nerve to ask for it back, maybe a couple years.

Do you wanna know how they justified all this? What started it?

My biological father got in contact with me again after my 17th birthday. He got the date wrong and I’m pretty sure he thought i was 18 and that’s why he did it. He found my number on facebook, and texted me some bullshit.

My parents allowed me to have a relationship with him- on their terms. I was texting him too late into the night, and too much at school. It was not to interfere with sleep or my school work.

Why? Because my parents didn’t want my grades to slip. No, not because it was causing any actual problems. I was doing really well in my classes, they were just watching my texts and keeping tabs on when i was texting him. They told him and me the same thing, and the next day he texted me while i was between classes and i messaged him back during my free periods, lunch, etc. Genuinely following the heart of the rule which I hadn’t before (i snuck my phone during class) and figuring it would be fine.

Got home, Mark asks if i talked to Eric (should have known he knew) said no, he said i have proof of 36 messages, give me your phone. Really? Yeah.

I handed it over and v o w e d to not say a single word to my parents. It was almost Christmas, and i was grounded for an indefinite amount of time (i think they sat me down after and justified it somehow and i got a month. A month. For texting my biological father. Lmao) They were concerned about our relationship but rather than addressing their concerns in a valid way i just got punished for continuing it. SO i was completely silent for two days. I figured 1) there wasn’t a damn thing they could do to make things worse. They’ve already taken everything before, and i usually cave and kiss ass for the last three weeks because it makes my life more pleasant and fuck them they did not deserve that for this and 2) if they were going to not let me talk to Eric i sure as shit wasn’t going to let them hear from me.

The head came when my mom wrote some trash apology letter to me (i wish i still had it but i shredded it as soon as i read it) that was really an attack on me disguised as an apology that she took no real accountability in. I felt so disgusting, so alone, i saw no way out. Genuinely in that moment i wanted to bleed out in my tub and i wanted Laura to find me. I took a shower and sliced my wrists, a lot. Not the long way, but deeper than i ever had, more than i ever had, and with every intention of getting to that point. I sat in the shower for a long while just watching my wrists bleed and then just kind of came to. THere was this brief panic that over took me and i went into my room and dressed in my giant sweats and sweatshirt and she came in and I showed her my wrists and we went to the er and i got hospitalized.

Yes, i was still grounded when i got out of the hospital. They gave me one day that we celebrated Christmas then they took all my presents until my grounding was done.

This is on par with my 18th birthday. I’m trying to remember why i was grounded this time. Probably weed. I got really smart about almost everything, and i feel like weed was one of them... I had my own car so it wasn’t fucking up theirs... I genuinely W I S H i could remember but honestly I don’t even know. But i was mid grounding on my birthday and they gave me my present, and then left me alone all night, so i figured out how to assemble it myself and cried most of the time.

They grounded me for a month for shaving half my head. They also came into my room while I was sleeping to shave the other half of my head. I refused. They haven’t ever crossed a physical barrier. I would have had them then. I think they might have known that...

I feel broken. Like, a scratched DVD. Like i feel like I’m just skipping at the part where i figure out how to process this shit.

It’s hard its really really hard. I mean talking about it makes it less hard, and I’m glad i was able to talk to Scott. He didn’t seem to really get it until i told him about the diary thing. It’s different for everyone, the part that makes it click when i share my story. It’s usually something they understand personally for one reason or another.

But its hard. I don’t think anyone really gets it, like I don’t think this sort of stuff is fit for conversation with anyone but trained professionals and myself.

My finger hurts and my tummy hurts i think because i had soda and I wanna be more stoned but i also just... wanna not. I thought writing a little might help me feel better but its just making more depressed.

I guess that’s the mood.

Jesses going into a really rough period. He’s having a really really hard time, and just i wish I were in a better space for him. I so so wish i was better at handling my jelousy and insecurities. I’m just trying to feel good about myself. I’m trying to be supportive and kind. I just want to be open and honest. I just want to be helpful and useful. And i know i am those things really often but right now i feel like a nagging annoying ugly morbid monster with a rotting smile and scaley skin and two bellies like a fucking cow. I know i know i know it doesn’t matter if i do but like... it feel like that on the inside. I feel like, there’s just nothing i can do to fill that void, like i feel purposeless right now i guess. I don’t know why I’m here I don’t know what I’m doing nothing makes me feel full i just feel like I’m distracting myself from the empty and i know i know i know i just need to keep pushing forward and taking care of myself but sometime i just don’t want to. I wonder who I’m doing to for.

It should be for me but often i feel like I’m living just because there’s nothing else to do. ANd that’s true but its not a great way to feel. It keeps me going. I know ill get to the good moments again, and probably a lot sooner than i think. I’m just still having a hard time. I’m still struggling to process. I still need to find a therapist among a million other things.

My stomach really hurts UGH.

I wish i had more to share but I don’t. I just hurt and everything is making me sad and I’m just GAH

I wish i knew something to try I wish i had something new i wish there was a way to turn it off for like ten minutes to just remember what it feels like to exist.

AND NOW MY HEAD HURTS

Boi. Ruin m e

In conclusion, i really want to kill myself, but i wont, i really want to cut myself, but i wont, and I’m really sad and i want more coping skills and some serotonin.

Goodnight 😴

#fuckin kill me #i cant do it #but if someone else does thats okay right #oof #tummy is killing me im never having soda again #crying #sad night #sad #BIG SAD #TW suicide #TW self harm

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captainderyn · 6 years ago

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Emeldir Deryn: A Masterpost

I said all the way back on Rielay’s Masterpost that I was going to do Emeldir to go along with her, so here he is. All the info you could ever want about the other half of the smuggler duo!

Credit to @therron-shan for the character sheet!

Preliminary Info: Name: Emeldir Deryn Nicknames: Em, Deryn, Captain, Kid (by Rielay only) Alias(es): Captain Emeldir Deryn, the Voidhound (does being future King-consort of Dubrillion count as an alias?) Age: 20 when the class story starts. Born: I can’t do years lmao so 10 years before the Sacking of Coruscant Gender: male Species: human Affiliations: Technically the Republic, various smuggling circles, eventually the nobility of Dubrillion/Dubrillion itself. Occupation: Crewmember/co-pilot on Rielay Taqq’s ship the Promise (ages 18-20), captain of the Phoenix/smuggler (ages 20-23), smuggler/republic privateer (ages 23-onwards), king-consort of Dubrillion (unknown)

Physical: General Description: “He’s secretly three jawas in a trench coat and or is a wookie on stilts, the jury is still out on that one. *muffled bickering off the holo feed* consider it revenge for your description of me, kid! No, for the record, he’s an honest kid, probably better than the smuggling lanes deserve. He’s done a lot of good for the Republic and even those outside of it and I am proud to call him my idiot in crime, even if he did lose his ship that I got for him that one time. (”Let it go Taqq, that was years ago!’-Emeldir, off feed)” --Captain Rielay Taqq Height: 6′4

Weight: I have no idea--maybe somewhere in the 180s range?

Hair: Chestnut brown that pulls auburn, grows straight. For a long time he kept it shaggy but in the latter half of his career (think Hutt Cartel/SoR) he cut it short/er. When he takes back Dubrilion with Risha he may let it grow again a bit, it depends on whether or not Risha will tackle him with a pair of scissors if he does. Skin/Fur: On the tanner side of being Caucasian. Scars/Birthmarks/Etc.:

Those on his face (Two bold ones vertically and horizontally across the right side of his face (looking at the pic its left but..whatever) with two fainter ones alongside those. Then he has a scar/s on his left leg from an old surgery to his knee he needed to have during the class story line after a job gone wrong. Then there’s a peppering of others across his body from other various mishaps but they aren’t note worthy.

**EDIT: That old injury to his leg left him with a slight off-ness in his gait. Not quite a full force limp but if you watch him walk/run there’s a hitch and irregularity that sometimes flares up worse than other times.

Tattoos/Markings: N/A

Cybernetics: N/A Handedness: he’s right handed. Style: Think classic smuggler, a good pair of trousers and some manner of tucked in, plain shirt under a lightly armored jacket--Not the orange one that he is in all the time. It’s most likely a brown one with blue accents or a black one. Not orange--and a hardy pair of boots.

If he’s off the job he tends to chill around in regular old space!jeans and a long sleeved shirt or sweatshirt if he won’t die of heatstroke. He loves his sweatshirts (and Risha loves to steal his sweatshirts) and a lot of them come from different locations that they’ve been to.

Other: He has a very noticeable Coruscanti accent! According to google that means he speaks with a Received Pronunciation (an accent form of British English). So..I guess mix that accent with the cadence/deepness level of the in game voice actor and that’s pretty close. While Rielay talks fairly loud in comparison, Emeldir speaks more softly like the only people who need to hear what he has to say are the one’s who listen, though he will raise his voice if he needs to.

Thanks to working so much with Rielay (and just in general tbh) Emeldir walks rather slow. Or rather, walks slow for someone with his stride. It drives Risha, who walks fast and on a mission, crazy that her husband ambles along unless it is a matter of great importance.

Mental/Emotional:

Background/Backstory:

Emeldir was born and raised in the upper levels of Republic City on Coruscant. He grew up splitting his formative years between the Senate Tower with his mother Adrianna Deryn--more on her later--and the ship hangars of his father Chridan Deryn’s business. He was a happy kid, had a good life, and was excelling in his academics and friendships.

Then when he was ten years on the Empire attacked, blockaded, and sacked Coruscant in what became known as the 0 ATC Sacking of Coruscant. His mother--a sitting Senator at the time--was taking hostage alongside the other senators not killed in the initial attack for the two days of Imperial occupation. Emeldir and his father were trapped in the Upper Level near the Senate Tower where they lived, unable to even get cross sector to reach Emeldir’s grandparents’ home. The Sacking affected him deeply and for awhile he faltered in his school work until he was only continuing to do well in his english/reading and history/social studies courses that he found interesting. His group of friends dwindled to a select few and he tended towards stress and nightmares on the regular.

By the time he hit his secondary education he hit high school he had mostly shed that dark period, though his friend group still remained small and his interest in academics still showed strongly in his English and history courses, with the others kept decent on principal. It was in those four years that he found his interest in Galactic politics and galactic history and started taking more interest in his mother’s work around the Senate and local Coruscant government. After his secondary education he was presented two good paths with an opportunity to pursue an education that could put him on the tracks to get into government himself, or a track that could land him a spot as an officer in the Republic military. While he didn’t know what he wanted to do he took up helping his father with his business while dabbling in some higher education courses to test the waters. It was in that year that he met Captain Taqq during her trouble with Chixi the Hutt.

The Captain was faced with a dilemma and where she was quite close to losing her ship and was at the time crew less. As Emeldir was tasked with doing the preliminary work on her ship he offered to help her keep it. That week of helping her with local jobs on the sly earned him her gratitude and she offered him a spot on her ship. Lured by the idea of such great freedom and adventure Emeldir put aside the paths laid in front of him and took up a spot as co-pilot on the Promise.

After a year and a half of working with Rielay Taqq she helped him get his own ship and he started building his reputation on his own as Captain Deryn. After a few steady months of work where he had built up his name with the help of Rielay he took the faithful job with Rogun the Butcher and the rest is recent history.

Personality:

Emeldir is really everything you would not expect from a smuggler. Yes, he’s got a sharp wit and an attitude of snark with a quick draw/reflexes. But he’s soft and kind hearted with a want to help people and do good. He’s got the honor code of a knight in shining armor and is more likely to put helping people above his own credit earnings.

He’s a Republic patriot with the knowledge that it has it’s flaws and he wants to work to fix them and is fascinated with why things work the way they do. He’s quite intelligent and wants to follow those pursuits of knowledge that come with so much travel, and sometimes that gets in the way of his work because no.

To the people who he chooses to be in his circle he is intensely loyal and lively, but those outside of it get a more reserved individual who is more straight to business and guarded.

(I still suck at describing personalities. Please just go and read anything under Taqq and Deryn or Questionably Legal and you’ll get it.)

Quirks: -A lot of the times when he is solo-ing a mission he maintains contact with either someone on the Phoenix or Rielay.

-Whenever he enters/exits the bridge of the Phoenix he will tap/put his hand on the frame. What started as making sure he wasn’t going to whack his head on the frame has become an affectionate gesture towards his ship. The door frame into the bridge is the shortest, so that’s where it originates from.

-When flying he has a habit of keeping a bit of a running commentary to himself. Whether that’s commenting on various things that are going on with his ship (like “oh well there goes those maintenance lights I’ll need to check that..) or commentary on the flight/state of the hyper lanes/how other people are flying if they’re in populated space. Disorders: Uhh...I guess you could point towards some form of PTSD but I haven’t it enough to comfortably go into detail. Addictions: N/A Strengths: He’s quite intelligent and good at talking people down in jobs, he’s got a big, kind heart and an innate sense of good, thanks to Rie’s teaching he’s a good shot. Weaknesses: Despite the fact that he’s intelligent he is extraordinarily good at charging headlong into situations instead of stopping and thinking, he’s got a big, kind heart and an innate sense of good, he puts the people he cares about above his own self or the state of his job. He tries to help everyone. Sometimes if people don’t understand what he’s saying intellectually he gets frustrated and short. Likes: Having a strong base of people he can trust, good and honest people and jobs, flying his ship and being with his crew/family. Dislikes: Working dishonest jobs or jobs that he’s lied to about, awful people as an umbrella term, the Republic v Empire war, most interactions in Hutt Space. Phobias/Fears: Losing everything he’s worked for including his ship, his family, and his home. A repeat of the Sacking of Coruscant, failing at his work, disappointing the people around him. Hobbies: Making bad puns, playing his space!violin, dancing with Risha around their ship/home, occasionally getting into Huttball, reading when he’s got the time. Interests: Politics, history, music a little bit, learning about his crew and their backstories tbh. Favorite movies: He usually hands control over to his crew which has let to him enjoying a wide variety of things. Favorite music: Space!Lindsey Stirling type stuff that he doesn’t need to worry about lyrics to and softer alternative rock. Favorite books: Certain history based books that aren’t overtly biased or filled with needless fluff, fantasy genre books. Favorite TV shows: Again, a wide variety thanks to tossing the remote to his crewmates, though huttball is his own occasional choice. But that depends on if he’s in the mood for it, usually he just follows the big games. Skills/Talents: Playing his space violin, he’s a very good pilot as well, I suppose he’s got a talent for talking with people and a knack for thinking through social/political issues the same way Rielay thinks through mechanical ones. Habits: Going onto the bridge and staring out the viewport when he needs to think, pacing when he’s thinking/stressed, playing space violin when he’s stressed, speaking through problems out loud to himself uhh...that’s all I can think of right now. Morality/Ethics:

He always helps people before he helps himself. He will put others above his own wants/needs/desires and help the little guy without fail. Even so he draws the line with keeping the people in his inner circle safe--they come above everything.

He has a strong morale compass that he follows to a t and he doesn’t tend to deviate from it, even if Risha rolls her eyes and complains that he missed out on a great opportunity because of it.

Google tells me he’s lawful good.

Goals: Short Term:(through SoR) Keep his team’s moral high, keep the Republic and Empire representatives from killing each other, try to keep from dying and to hopefully defeat the Emperor.

Long Term: Help Risha take back Durbillion! Then help Risha stabilize Dubrillion! Hopefully work with the Republic Senate to allow Outer Rim words better representation in the Galactic Senate. Motivations: His morale compass, what he believes is right and the best course of action. In some sense what is the best for the greater good, but also what is best for himself/and his family at the time. Other: According to google he is an ENFP-A type personality which makes sense. He’s likable and charming and can get people to rally around him. It’s what makes him so alluring to have in a political position--he’s motivated by the people, people take to him, and he isn’t pushed by greed.

Relationships: Sexual/Romantic Orientation: He’s bisexual. Relationship History: Not really existent. He had a few “relationships” of the “oh we’re dating”, hand holding type and one in his last year of secondary school that faltered once they went their separate ways.

Reputation: "Oh he’s Risha Drayen’s guy.”

Family: Adrianna Deryn: I said we’d get to her! She is a Coruscant political figure. For a long time she worked in the local city council in varying positions until serving on the council itself. From there she was elected to the Deep Core Coalition as one of the Coruscant senator’s Associated Planetary Representative. From there she was elected to a seat on the Senate and served for her two terms of six years, with the second coming to a close during the Sacking of Coruscant. After that she was kept for another 2 years before the Senate finally turned over and reelected almost all seats. She was always very close to Emeldir, as he was her only child, but also because he took after her quite closely, though she was surprised when he went off to become a smuggler.

Now, however, she sees what good he’s done and would not have had it any other way. Though she does worry for him and cringe at the danger he puts himself in for others, the Republic, and his work.

Chridan Deryn: The owner of a well known Deep Core ship security and modification business. He’s a first generation Republic citizen, with his father having been from Ziost and his mother from somewhere in the Mid Rim out of Republic territory. While he’s done work for smugglers such as Captain Zavia Torelli and Captain Taqq his work has long since expanded into contracts from the Republic military and other ship companies. He was the one that told Emeldir to follow wherever his path led him, whatever it may be and was the first to come around to that being smuggling. He took an immediate shine to Emeldir’s crew.

Friends:

Rielay Taqq: She counts as family tbh. She is 100% family who am I kidding? Emeldir’s best friend, mentor, and family who he met on Coruscant in the way described in his Background section. (Fun fact: they actually met for the first time when Rielay was working with Zav just prior to the Sacking! Rielay was 17 and Emeldir was 10; neither of them really remembered it eight years later). They are essentially grafted at the hip, as is a running joke, would die for each other or do anything for each other and are a well known duo in the smuggling world.

Esrin, Fashira and Zasharr: All of @delavairesslegacy‘s kids who are associated with Rielay are also associated with Emeldir because well..see above. He gets along well with them.

His crew: I won’t go into each and every one of them, but he’s on good terms with all of them (though things are a little tense with Gus), and he’s closest with Corso and Risha out of them all.

Ugh he needs friends. Huh. There’s probably people I’m forgetting.

Enemies: Anyone from Skaavak to Rogun the Butcher to Senator Dodonna and uh...Darmas? I guess Actavarus as well, though they’ve yet to meet face to face. Other than that he doesn’t have a huge list of enemies coming for him. He’s a pretty well liked guy in the smuggling world.

Love Interest:

Risha, Risha is his love interest, the love of his life if you ask him. He’s head over heels for her and woulnd’t want anyone else to call his wife. They’ve seen each other through thick and thin, through near death scenarios and disasters and been each other’s rock through it all. And they’ll continue to tackle every challenge life sets in their way, from Dubrillion onward.

Affiliations: Describe their ship:

The Phoenix: The sister ship to Rielay Taqq’s the Promise (Same XS Stock Light Freighter model, though a newer year) though it’s heavily modified by the hyperdrive Risha put in, the modded out engine, shielding systems, and uh...I can’t remember what else she added, it’s been literal years since I played the main story. Google has failed me. While the exterior isn’t as noticeably changed the exterior yellow detail paint has been repainted to blue. The interior however has been personalized with a little of every crew member’s flair and become a home away from home for them all.

Role:Captain Faction Loyalty: He’s smuggled for the Hutts and for the Republic, though his main loyalty is to the Republic. Famous Jobs:

His work in stopping The Voidwolf over Corellia

Exposing Senator Dodonna’s and Darmas’ treachery

Finding Nok Drayen’s treasure, making it out of that location, surviving the Voidwolf’s flagship. Aiding in winning Corellia’s independence.

Helping save lives on Makeb and evacuate civilians, Ziost...defeating the Sith Emperor on Yavin IV and then again a bit later on because wow he can’t stay dead until he’s killed twice, huh. (Organizing the team that helped defeat the emperor a second time, that comprised of both Empire and Republic blood)

Weapons/Specs: Two blaster pistols: A modded up Mk-3 and a standard Yavin Targeter MK-3 that he takes very good care of. He tends to fight more aggressive than not when given no other choice the the situation escalates beyond being able to talk it down.

Other Biographical Info: Birthworld: Coruscant Homeworld: Republic City, Coruscant and eventually Dubrillion Where is/are their stronghold(s) located? Where do they consider home?

He owns a small/medium-ish sized apartment in the Senate District of the Mid/Upper levels of Coruscant. That’s where he and Risha call home in the off time between missions. Eventually when he and Risha take back Durbillion it moves to the Palace district of Durbillion I guess--I need to start headcanoning on that! Familial Background: Heh, I already covered this, see above in his Background section :’) Other Info: While not necessarily worked into either of our canons there is an AU sort of situation where Emeldir and Risha meet @spectrum270‘s Prin and Risha in an alternate reality and it’s a fun time.

#my writing #swtor #character reference #smuggler #swtor smuggler #oc: Emeldir #otp: questionably legal #kind of #you can see the point where I stop knowing what Im talking about #you can pinpoint the exact point I start bullshitting my way through this #as per usually this was real fun to do #thanks therron-shan for making this awesome character sheet :')#sorry @ anyone who is on mobile

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simplysaiyanlicious · 6 years ago

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Hi, hope you're OK! c: For the questions 5, 6, 7, 9, 11, 14, 17, 18, 21, 27, 32, 34, 31, 36, 42 To much questions, sorry 😅 respond whatever you want :)

Holy shit, lol! Yeah I’m okay ^-^ Hope you are too!

OKAY. *cracks knuckles* Let’s do this~ For the personal asks meme.

5. Coke or Pepsi? I honestly like both, but I prefer pepsi, even though I don’t buy/drink it nearly as often as coke. LOGIC! I dunno why I do this to be honest, I am questioning my life’s choices right now.

6. Someone you hate? Oh boy… there are two. Both used to be real life friends of mine and they’ve both royally screwed me over more than once in the past. I hope I never run into them again because the world ain’t big enough. One of them literally gave me nightmares for years because of the shit she did.

7. Best Friends? @simplyhaythamtastic and @reikoku-vegeta I LOOOOVE YOOOOUUUU!!!!! ;_________; *EXPLOSIVE WHEEZE* MY BAES!!ilu forever T__T 💖💖💖💖💖💖

9. What’s your dream job? I always wanted to be an archeologist (never happened though). History fascinates me, figuring out how people lived, what extinct animals looked like, how they survived. I’ve loved dinosaurs all my life. I do collect fossils as a part of my taxidermy collection. It’s the closest I’ll ever get lol.

11. Last time you cried? Last saturday… me and @simplyhaythamtastic were plotting some really depressing stuff for our Vegeblack RP lmao. It was very sad and I both look forward and dread actually writing those scenes in the future lol.

14. Birthday? February 21!

17. What do you love? Dragon Ball Z? My friends, closest relatives, my animals, my precious PC, drawing, gaming, writing.

18. Obsession? Dragon Ball Z??? And Dragon Age (Inquisition in particular). I will never not love these two franchises. T_T

21. Kiss or hug? Hug, definitely and even then, only with people I’m close to. I don’t really like physical contact with most people. The first time my first boyfriend tried to kiss me goodbye I almost bit his tongue off, it was an automatic reaction lol. He was fine but he never tried again lmao.

27. Something you would change about yourself? To stop being so anxious about everything all the time. I can’t imagine what it’s like to live without anxiety and stress on an almost daily basis.

31. Ever had a heartbreak?Yes, twice. One of them involved one of the people from question 6. >>;;

32. Favorite show? DRAGON BALL Z??? TOO OBVIOUS I GUESS. I like the Walking Dead even though I haven’t watched the second half of season 7 and the entirety of season 8 yet. Also currently watching Orange Is The New Black because I finally got my hands on netflix, I like it a lot so far. Almost at season 3.

34. Any talents?I don’t know if it’s a useful talent but it’s very easy for me to remember dialogue from movies/games/shows. Well I suppose it’s useful because I did this with DBZ when it aired here in the early 2000s and I taught myself English that way as a 12 year old. I had entire episodes memorized from beginning to end.

So that, and art I guess. XD

36. Any bad habits? I pick at my face. >>;;; I do this as stress relief and it’s a VERY tough habit to break, I do it without even realizing when I’m watching tv or something. I’m working on it though. I used to do the same with my nails and I don’t do that anymore. ^_^ I really want to break it because it’s not helping my confidence.

42. Are you okay?Oui. It’s been a good week so far, I hope it stays that way for a while longer. *knocks on wood*

#saiyanlicious replies #thanks for aksing these!#it was fun ^-^#garu0212

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fyrapartnersearch · 6 years ago

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rEEE writers inbound

hey there! i’m rhys. i am 22, live in the ct, and love ooc chatter! my ooc is pretty lax, but i promise my writing is a helluva lot more formal. i write in third person, past/present tense, and paragraph form. im not a rapid-fire writer, and won’t be able to constantly get replies in every day (i can get responses in anywhere between every couple of days to a week or two). however, i will ALWAYS put tlc into all of my posts and characters! i write anywhere between 300-900 words. it’s definitely alright if you don’t feel up to that amount at any given point, but i do appreciate keeping it somewhere in this range. im very wordy, and can spew out a novel if im excited enough lmao

my limits are pretty general; i will not do beastiality, pedophilia, vore, or scat. i can indulge in a variety of kinks, but if it’s a little much for any average person, i’m less likely to write it out (i.e extreme ddlg or adult babies, furries, extreme pet play, etc.) but i can be persuaded to lightly touch on certain kinks as long as they’re not 10000% filth lmao i cannot, and will not, do seme/uke or top/bottom dynamics. absolutely not. queer relationships shouldn’t be defined by whose taking the D. i dont want to interact with squeamish little femboys, or awful macho men with downright rapey tendencies. versatility is key, and power struggles are what i live for! i will, however, indulge in BDSM dynamics with certain plots— although, domination isn’t always about penetration, you know?

give me characters with aspirations, hopes and dreams, and crushing past experiences that flesh them out into who they are. no one is perfect, and we all have things that rear their ugly heads in the dark. problematic characters, male or female or anything in between, are everything. i love lgbtq+ characters, as i am part of the community myself, and will almost always be more inclined in writing queer characters. not to say i won’t write for strictly straight pairings, m/f, but usually i am iffy when approached with it if i am just meeting you.

i write for all genders, ethnicity, and orientations! you can find a few writings examples of mine here. i am pretty welcoming of most things. smut, of course. some kink a little out there that you want to suggest? let's do it, dude. i am super OOC friendly and i am pretty much a garbled mess when i get to know you! i’m a social person— i feel like a burden if you’re not into chatting with me, so please, if you’re not looking to be both a writing partner as well as a friend, i might not be the gal for you. i am open to crooked relationships, ones that don't function right, dark/morally corrupt characters, unconditional love, etc. my interests fluctuate! i am down, 24/7, guys! i only roleplay over email, but will ooc chat over discord or hangouts! here's a list of fandoms and pairings below that i am looking to write for atm. i do have many more, but these are just the ones off the top of my head!

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Borderlands

Handsome Jack/Rhys

Handsome Jack/Rhys/Nisha

Life is Strange

Max Caulfield/Chloe Price

Max Caulfield/Kate Marsh/Victoria Chase

Nathan Prescott/Warren Graham

Rachel Amber/Chloe Price

Frank Bowers/Damon Merrick

Dick Grayson/Jason Todd

Dick Grayson/Slade Wilson

Dick Grayson/Wally West

Harley Quinn/Pamela Isley

Batman: Telltale Series

Bruce Wayne/John Doe

Bruce Wayne/Selina Kyle

Bruce Wayne/Harvey Dent/Selina Kyle

Marvel

Stephen Strange/Tony Stark

Bucky Barnes/Sam Wilson

Thor/Bruce Banner

Peter Parker/Harry Osborn

Peter Parker/Wade Wilson

Wade Wilson/Vanessa Carlysle

Gwen Stacy/Peter Parker/Harry Osborn

Peter Parker/Wade Wilson/Vanessa Carlysle

Uncharted

Nathan Drake/Samuel Drake

Nathan Drake/Harry Flynn

Chloe Frazer/Nadine Ross

TTGOT

Asher Forrester/Gwyn Whitehill

Rodrik Forrester/Arthur Glenmore

Mira Forrester/Margaery Tyrell

Gryff Whitehill/Elaena Glenmore

Gared Tuttle/Finn

Gared Tuttle/Josera Snow

The Walking Dead

Rick Grimes/Negan

TWDG

Javier Garcia/David Garcia

Clementine/Gabriel Garcia

Clementine/Louis

Clementine/Violet

Marlon/Louis

Javier Garcia/Paul “Jesus” Rovia

Far Cry (3-5)

Jason Brody/Vaas Montenegro

Jason Brody/Bambi “Buck” Hughes

Ajay Ghale/Pagan Min

Ajay Ghale/Sabal

Ajay Ghale/Sabal/Amita

Rook/Joseph Seed

Rook/John Seed

Rook/Faith Seed

Punisher

Frank Castle/David Lieberman

Frank Castle/Billy Russo

Mass Effect: Andromeda

Scott Ryder/Reyes Vidal

Scott Ryder/Gil Brodie

Scott Ryder/Peebee

Sara Ryder/Peebee

Sara Ryder/Vetra Nyx

Kill Your Darlings

Lucien Carr/Allen Ginsberg

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Onto original plots!

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Office romances/BDSM/Friends with benefits-turned-lovers

okay, so, i had this type of roleplay with someone a while back. maybe more than two or three years back that i fell out of contact with and i could never really get it out of my head because it was probably one of the best character-building stories i’ve ever taken part of. :’) i don’t remember their name, but i do hope they’ll contact me again if they ever see this. while some of this may seem specific, none of it is concrete and i promise i am very easy to get along with and very accomodating! the plot i remember had three different relationships— completely different people, with different lives and different worlds, with only one common thing between them being that they work in the same building. we can do all three, or we can do a few, or even one! i dont mind.

**pairing A; M/F preferred (lol i know broke my own rule, but i adore femdoms! extra: please come with an open mind. this is not a 50 shades AU, and i do not want it to be.) this one is between a CEO and an intern in their senior year of college. The CEO is a femdom, and freshly out of divorce, takes a liking to the clumsy intern who’d spilled coffee on her more than once. The intern has never been in a relationship with an older woman, let alone one running a multi-million dollar company, but hey, isn’t that the dream for some broke twenty-something down on his luck? She introduces him to BDSM, and while he’s hesitant, the idea is as exciting as it is frightening. He accepts her offer— while it’s difficult at times, he begins to learn more about her. Her ex-spouse, her young child, and her unwillingness to develop a sincere relationship with him. She’s had subs before, and while she tells him he isn’t disposable, he begins to feel it was the truth. He grows to have feelings for her, and while she isn’t too keen on admitting it, the feeling is mutual. I’d love to explore their dynamic in and out of sex, and the conflict between the intern and her ex-spouse. I love age gaps, and think it would be awesome to see them develop over time to find common ground to establish a personal relationship and trying to even out their power imbalances. I don’t mind playing either the CEO or the intern, but I am leaning more towards the CEO. :V**

**pairing B; M/M preferred (this one is waaay more gritty and more dub-con than anything so please beware!) this one is between two higher-ups who have been butting heads for years— and occasionally, sexual tension neither have acted on. A is a snarky, openly gay man, and probably what some would consider shallow and noncommittal. B is a brooding, closeted ‘by the book’ type well into his thirties, and refuses to engage in anything sexual with men despite his obvious attraction; B has younger siblings he takes care of as well as his mother, and being the oldest son and only provider, hasn’t done a thing for himself in twenty years. A lives completely alone, complete with a bachelor pad and, the influx of flings that went nowhere past sex, and has risen to the top with his own sheer will. they have conflicting motives, and while both of them have an intense hatred for each other, they’ve never engaged in physical altercations in fear of losing their jobs. one day, A jabs a little below the belt, and finally, B starts swinging. this fight turns into something way more heavy in the company parking lot. what happens between them in the long run is something desperate, needy, and longing for real affection. it began as a mindless need for sex, angry and mean and formal, with B being especially unwilling to ‘give up’ his masculinity and ever be on the receiving end in fear of losing the control he needs to keep this up. i’d love to see them begin to see each other in a different light, and changing each other for the better. i’d also love to see A showing B that sex doesn’t have to be meaningless, and that he doesn’t need to fear letting A be in control. And B showing A that commitment isn’t as terrifying as it may be, with them gradually going from rivals, to friends with benefits, and eventually lovers. i, again, don’t mind writing for either! **

**pairing C; F/F preferred. (aaa this pairing is way more fluffy and sweet, with hurt/comfort as a stable of their dynamic.) this one is between two small-office employees in the company. A is fairly tame at work in order to support her sibling(s), of which she has adopted from her father’s custody years ago. she is fairly confident with her sexuality, and while not being the type to frequent clubs, is dragged along by a few friends and there, meets B. B is a young woman who just recently got out of a relationship with an abusive ex fiance— B has only ever been with that man, and was never confident in exploring her sexuality due to a religious upbringing and parents who were dead set on traditional values. she’s never strayed from her ex, and while he wasn’t faithful or remotely good to her in return, she was heartbroken with their split. months after, he returns to the city and B’s close friends decide to take her out on a girls’ night to make her feel better— B coincidently sees her ex, and feeling childish and unattractive, heads off to the bar to get a drink. she’s nowhere near a drinker, and just before she does drown her sorrows, is hit on by A. while initially shocked, B is flustered and finds herself immediately attracted to A. they have a one-night stand, and while B believes that A would just leave in the morning, A instead lays with her until she wakes up, and leaves her number. B is too anxious to text her. they bump into each other at the elevator that Monday. they agree to be just friends, until B knows what she wants. A is willing to wait. B might have a crush, and A is intent on building B up to love herself and her body. i would overall prefer to write for A, but if you’re dead set, no prob!**

Serial killer/1960’s/Small town sheriff

no preferred pairing! would love, love, love to see something between a serial killer and a small town sheriff in the mid-to-late sixties. we could make up a new little town, or find one to our liking! A is the sheriff who had been born and raised in this town with a good home life, loving parents, and a steady moral compass, albeit trapped in a loveless marriage. they know everyone, and every nook and cranny of the place like the back of their hand. this is the type of place where people don’t have to lock their doors at night, or constantly watch their kids when they’re out in the yard playing. that is, until people start going missing and horrifyingly mutilated bodies began to pop up around town. B is a well-liked baker in town; known to be genuinely friendly and kind, B has a very corrupt past. both of their parents were heinously abusive, and as a child, B developed sociopathic tendencies. B was inherently spiteful of the town and the people in it, for leaving them to rot in hell for eighteen years, and for never reaching out. B formed a god complex, his intentions to ‘purify the corrupt’. they keep tabs on almost everyone in town, and the victims they do take are put in the soundproof basement of his home to be ‘baptized’; tortured, beaten, and mutilated beyond recognition. A and B are friendly with each other as A comes to the bakery every morning, with B’s motives completely unbeknownst. one night, A, frustrated and pissed from the dead ends of the case of the decade, decides to head to the bar and relax. B is the one face A didn’t mind seeing that night, and one thing lead to another, with A and B in a dark alley getting each other off— i definitely see this as B grooming A to be a complicit pet, and when A gets closer and closer to figuring out who the killer is, he forms a deep connection with B. B develops a possessiveness over A, along with that sense of ownership he’d established between them. B manipulates A, coerces him into a false sense of security, and eventually— A finds out, and while B initially thinks to kill A, A is corrupted by B and forms some kind of stockholm syndrome for B. it’s up to A on whether or not they turn B in, or cover the killer’s tracks. B, despite his very sick and repulsive nature, develops a true infatuation for A, as close to love as they were ever going to get, and A is desperate enough to please B that they’ll do anything to not disappoint them.

Post apocalypse/decades later/immunity

no pairing preferred! the plot I had in mind is loosely based off of a video game called "The Last of Us", which i am sure most of you have a general knowledge of! (definitely check it out if you don’t :O it’s a great game!!) the prompt i was shooting for goes something like this; in a post-apocalyptic world where a pandemic has killed off most living species, character A is a lone wolf with little to do with other people that don't benefit him, except for a select few. A is especially rough around the edges, as he's lived through some sick shit and lived to tell the tale. A had once been part of a group dedicated to finding a cure, but things went south, and a lot of people died. A had a close bond with the leader of said group, and coincidentally they were the only survivors. their past together, having been deeply demented and twisted, caused them to fall out. said leader has rebuilt a new group in the ten years since the last time they'd seen A. character B is the only known immune person alive, and has dedicated their life to being a resource to finding a cure. A and his (current) contact/partner in crime have something taken from them, and are determined to get it back. they do some searching, and are confronted with this group-- they have what they need, but are only willing to give it to them for a favor in return. no one can outrun their past forever. so, this plot isn't concrete. things can be changed, we can do whatever we want, and i am happy to comply to any revisions or suggestions! i'd really enjoy taking on A, if that's alright!

TREASURE HUNTERS/ANCIENT CURSES/LOVE-HATE DYNAMICS/MODERN

treasure hunters!!!! yES!! think Uncharted or Tomb Raider. an architect/treasure hunter is being funded an expedition to find a lost treasure and they are forced to bring along a reporter in order to receive the funds. the reporter and architect certainly dont get along in the beginning— they bicker, and clash on most fronts. the expedition wasnt meant to be dangerous. what was initially thought to be a simple job turned into something treacherous; bandits, a team of hired hitmen and their leader looking to take the treasure for themselves, and some rather supernatural elements that they both couldnt quite put a finger on. the treasure hunter and the reporter have to work together to get out of this alive, and get to the artifact before someone else does. (the “treasure” is definitely up for debate!! we can chose a real life lost treasure, or just make one up!! it can be anywhere around the world, and everything is at our disposal).

DEMON/INHERITANCE/HUNTERS/MODERN

character A has an awful time living in the city— alone, and without mom's guidance, completely lost. one day they receive a call about a deceased relative, one they'd never heard of, one that apparently left their estate and everything in it in their will to A. with nothing but the clothes on their back, A took a shot in the dark and drove out to this presumed "estate" come early summer, only to find that it's a mansion in a tiny little town with an eerie vibe and populated by the typical small town churchgoers and farm folk. living in this town was a hell of a challenge; everyone was nice, too nice, and people started to go missing. character B is an exceptionally charismatic, charming person and the only mechanic/handyman in town. A and B become friends, partially, when A needs to fix up the piping in their estate. A stumbles upon the attic one day, and for once, they start to get why this whole town reeked to the roots in weird shit-- their deceased relative was tracking something here in this town, having to do with all of the MIA townsfolk. DR has a board of possible suspects, and at the center? B. A shrugs it off as their relative having been paranoid, but the longer A stays in this town, the more apparent it becomes that DR wasnt crazy. B is, in fact, not the murderer, instead a supernatural being (open for debate! im on the fence with demons, vampires, etc.) on a mission to track down the monster, same as DR. i am so down for internal struggles, sweet gestures, and overall, two people just trying to make it work! i could also see A being hella paranoid that B is the monster, and maybe tries to throw cloves of garlic at them only to realize thats not exactly how this monster hunter business works lmao

DEPRESSED WRITER/YOUNG MUSE/between 1920’s-1960’s/sex, drugs, & the american dream

m/m preferred! A is a severely depressed middle-aged man believing his life has been wasted. his wife left him with their child at her hip, his career was in a rut, and he had nothing left to live for. opting for suicide, he goes out one evening to purchase a bottle of gin to down with a handful of prescription sleeping pills when he returned to his apartment. instead of going directly home, he’s swept in by the music in an underground club for queers. there he meets B; all encompassing, angel faced, and the only person A didn’t know how to look away from. B is a former US Navy Seal, aspiring musician, and avid indulger of the human body— A stays a little too long, owlish and red, and after the show, B approaches him with a cattish smile. they spark a friendship, and A is thrown down the rabbit hole when B introduces him to his social circle, filled to the brim with drag queens, junkies, queers, and the overall unusual— he integrates into this community, his contemplation of suicide only a distant memory, and begins to find himself extremely attracted to B. he lights a fire in A, something dangerous and unquenchable, and A finds himself drawn in by the unpredictability. A embarks with B on a journey of self exploration, passion, and inevitable love in a world that scorned the oddities of human attraction and anyone who dared to be free.

thanks for your time! if you've read through, please contact me at [email protected] on email or rhys#3615 on discord and mention kiwi somewhere in your initial message. n_n

Rhys xoxo

#oc rp #multiple paragraph #long term #email #marvel rp #twd rp #smut rp #mcu rp #dc rp #submission

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