#this is so scary and I’m not ready
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OH NO OH NO IM FREAKING OUT
I’m afraid someone help me
#47#this is gonna be the first real date I’ve had in a while#I’m not good at this#I’m emotionally stunted and I’m afraid#and why coffee why do I keep making this same mistake#OBIOUSLY I’m just gonna shake and go to the bathroom too many times#oh my gosh what if she thinks I’m weird#at least I look hot#maybe the pants color is weird#what am i gonna do#this is so scary and I’m not ready#no no i can do this and it’s been long enough#i can put myself out there and be okay#I’ll be okay#this isn’t an interview it’s coffee and a chat#do I even want to do this??#i have so much to do this month#should I even do this???#it’s too late to cancel so it doesn’t matter#curses someone help
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The idea that GRRM is anti Tolkien is particularly funny because ASOIAF is sprinkled with rather intricate (and even passionate) homages to LOTR. And I can’t help but think of how Tolkien’s Fellowship, more specifically the Hobbits, may have inspired GRRM’s Night’s Watch. Jon Snow, for starters, is in many ways a combination of LOTR’s Frodo and Aragorn. And in the same way that Frodo, Sam, Merry, and Pippin are unexpected heroes in LOTR (because who looks to a hobbit as the face of an epic adventure?), Jon the bastard becomes the leader of a ragtag of socially disenfranchised men (in the form of the NW) who are anything but heroic. Sure there’s the odd knight or noble in there, but the NW is quite full of criminals and the very worst of the social order. The hobbits aren’t the strongest or the sharpest but they become the face of the fight against Sauron. And the NW, while being severely undermanned and under-equipped, has become the main force that stands against winter. GRRM even adds a love letter to Tolkien’s Sam Gamgee by adding his on Sam - Sam Tarly - who acts as a moral compass and counselor to Jon, in the same ways that Sam Gamgee is key to Frodo’s journey. And just like Frodo, Jon gets his very own pair of jokester friends, one of whine is even named Pyp. So it’s all very beautiful and nice, and we should talk about it more because it’s super evident that GRRM is a massive Tolkien fanboy. But I do have to say tho, GRRM’s take on Gandalf is exceedingly hilarious just because Melisandre is famously very bad at her job.
#asoiaf#lord of the rings#lotr#Gandalf - old and scary and very competent at his job#Mel - very old very scary and displays varying levels of competence#jokes aside another cool parallel between Jon and Frodo is that both#choose to embark on this dangerous journey because who else will do it?#Lots of arguing about who will destroy the ring who should have it etc and Frodo is just like#I’m ready to do what needs to be done even if it takes me to Mordor#Which is very similar to Jon who watches the rest of Westeros bicker about some stupid chair#And he’s willing to sacrifice his life and win no glory to save humanity in the face of an existential threat#And don’t think I need to get too much into Jon’s similarities with Aragorn because they’re plain as day#Also the iron throne and the ring of power having cool parallels?#Anyway asoiaf is so heavily inspired by LoTR and grrm is a such a huge fanboy#It’s insane that people think he hates Tolkien or whatever#jon snow#sam tarly#pyp#grenn#the night’s watch#frodo baggins#sam gamgee#merry brandybuck#pippin took#melisandre of asshai#gandalf#valyrianscrolls
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adventures of young mikey in his lil night shirt
#the monkees#mike nesmith#michael nesmith#i was watching monkee see monkee die and is he not just precious?#the lil accent#protect early episodes tv show mike at all costs#his soft little nervous voice and big but soft mama hands#clunky farm boy in a little weird girl hat#the pjs are so cute#they’ve all got their jammies on ready for bedtime!!!#like they’re just little ones in their little pajamas#like you know peter picked his little bunny onesie out for himself cause it’s orange and he likes orange :D#let them go to bed scary manor!#they wanna go to sleep time! mike is trying to hard to keep everyone all safe and happy. he’s trying his best#okay i’m sorry i just watch this episode and start gushing because they’re just SO LITTLE!!!!!
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motorcycling asian butch lesbian whizzer okay i see you
#dumbest headcannon to come out of my naatco falsettoland fixation#imagine her guys#please see my vision here#naatco falsettoland#you don’t understand there’s a certain thing abt her riding a motorcycle#posting with actual fandom tags is scary but i’m ready guys#dykesettos#im so tallsettos
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tonight i’m resting and keeping to myself bc i just need a minute, but tomorrow i think i’ll tinker with my rules and tidy up this blog overall. i’ve been thinking about a few things that have likely contributed to me feeling overwhelmed here, and i need to sit down and drop old drafts/asks, clean up my followers list, and set a lil boundary. hopefully after i do, i can get back to writing and bugging y’all at a normal pace 💜
#or a normal pace for me asdfg#i just kinda? felt sick at the idea of coming online tonight#and that feeling passed but it made me go “oh i need to really do something about this huh”#and it’s not anything serious i think it’s more so understanding the way i am and what makes me anxious or overwhelmed and accepting that#rather than forcing myself to try and work past those feelings bc i want to make things easier for others#or bc i feel bad for letting go of things i don’t have muse for anymore#anyway anyway! i’m gonna finish my silly lil scary movie and hopefully have an early night#tbh the lack of sleep probably didn’t help my feelings today either :’ )#please take care of yourselves and remember to take breaks 💜💜💜 mwah mwah!!#get ready to ramble | ooc
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It is time
lads, ladies, and lassos..... it is time The website will update in less than 3 hrs
We have such little time to prepare our hearts, our minds, and our souls Godspeed Welcome Home Fandom
May God save us all
#welcome home#wally darling#barnaby b beagle#howdy pillar#sally starlet#julie joyful#poppy patridge#frank frankly#eddie dear#yes i am being dramatic#reblog if ur ready#reblog if ur not#I sure as HELL am ready#AND NOT#i’m so excited it’s scary
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I was prepared for the one two punch of the episodes Limbo and Memoria, but I DID NOT remember that Time to Kill was IMMEDIATELY AFTER THAT.
#wolf 359#wolf359#Time to Kill is horrifying#no rest for the binging podcast enjoyer#god it’s so good#I’m not ready to hear him scream over the comms#as far as I know he’s the same as Lovelace meaning that’s a whole person out there and god that’s so scary#bc he truly believes he’s Jacobi#and it happens immediately after THE episode about personhood and humanity through HERA’s breakdown#UGGGGHHHHHHHHHH
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Not done yet with the new Scary design ref sheets but take a work doodle of what she’ll look like throughout the season so far
#dndads#dungeons and daddies#dndads fanart#scary marlowe#I’ve cycled through countless design choices on these refs I’m so ready to finalize them so I can be done with them lol#I haven’t even touched her dance outfit yet I need to get current episode outfit done first
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ok. moving out update. today i:
talked to my beloved ex supervisor / mentor (<- SCARY!!!!!) to ask her about her experiences living by herself esp as a short woman (which is not a big deal except for how it is + how my parents think it is) and get her advice abt how to navigate that experience psychologically and practically. i asked her if we could talk abt this very impulsively on thursday after not having the courage to do it for almost a year btw (<- BRAVE!!!!!!!!) and i was still too scared / embarrassed to ask her some stuff abt safety / self defense lol but it mostly went really well!
started making a budget and determined that a) i may be getting overpaid somehow (😳) b) i may be getting double or even triple charged for my health and life insurance (😒) so now i need to call hr on monday and figure all of that out. and also c) i suck at math but we knew that. but i forced myself to figure out what i did wrong so that’s an achievement
made my first ever student loan payment 😀🔫
booked a tour of one apartment and attempted to book a tour of another (the same place i was looking at in may) but their website was glitching out and then they didn’t answer when i called to schedule it over the phone which. hm. 😒 but yeah the tour(s) will happen mid week next week and im going to ride the shuttle to the apartment complex(es) and back to campus to see what that’s like too!
posted on local subr*ddit asking for recommendations for those two apartments + other places in the area. haven’t gotten anything back bc i just made the post but 😎👍
read a bunch of old journal entries from 2021 to remind myself of what it was like to move onto campus and how i pushed through my family’s hurt and disapproval to live the way i needed to. haven’t finished reading it all yet but i will tomorrow (while also doing my stupid homework 🙄)
#purrs#i really hope im not being overpaid lol. because if i am being overpaid that means i can’t afford to move out 😍 but my paystubs#are saying thats how much im making every week and it is… significantly more then im supposed to be making which is absolutely not a bad#thing i just don’t understand why it’s happening + want to make sure it’s supposed to be happening so that i don’t depend on an error that#would devastate me when remedied yk. but yeah. also i haven’t factored car stuff into any of this yet sooooo erm. we’ll see what happens#anyways uhm this is kind of crazy like. i am really making a concerted effort to try to move out. SOON. and my family doesn’t know.#chuckles im in danger but also….. tess pepprs epic girlboss redemption arc i think. i am doing big scary things and i can do them. fuck yeah#like. i don’t have to live like this anymore. i can change it TODAY. i have that power. i have done my time. i’m ready to fly and no one can#stop me. i will not be held back anymore. i’m going to live the life of my wildest dreams and i’m on the brink of beginning it.
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To be perfectly honest I’m a little scared
#and by a little scared I mean moderately.#I am uhhh directly in the path of a hurricane#and I am Prepared but like it is still in fact scary to be anticipating it#I have batteries and power packs and a radio and so much water in bottles and containers and so much food and I am mentally ready#but like 😬 anticipation#like I’m definitely prepped in the supplies sense it is just the storm I am waiting for
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popping in to say that y’all really do make me so happy!! as people and as writers, i’m so grateful to know y’all. i know i’m really scarce rn, and that might not change for a little while, but pls don’t forget that you make me smile!! on a day like today, when things are hard bc that’s just life, you make me smile. you with your creativity and lovable characters and unique writing styles — you make the days a little brighter, and i thank you from the bottom of my heart 💜
#this feels out of the blue but truly today was really hard for personal reasons i won’t talk about here#and getting little notifications for replies and reading them made my heart feel a little lighter#and i just don’t want anyone to forget that i care and truly appreciate all of you#it’s hard? scary? i dunno — but it’s hard to reach out individually sometimes bc of my personality so i just want to say this here for now#i might sound cheesy as heck but i’m happy that out of all the people on this silly planet on this silly site i get to know you#and i’m so happy i do 💜#get ready to ramble | ooc
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My reflexes to aim in fps games < my reflexes to pause in a horror games
#I’ve never been so ready to pause a game#I am literally training my pause speed I’m so scared#baby’s first ever horror game#technically my second if you count 15 minutes in amnesia#I’m just a scared little boy#the quarry#scary#horror games#why am I doing this to myself I need to sleep in like 40 minutes#and I can now no longer do so#I’m such a fool
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guys i’m not even joking like i’m actually scared of Pierce lol. he’s my oc!!! but he’s fucking terrifying!! AHHH
#like actually tho#can’t say much but WOW#no other character has affected me in this way#he’s actually terrifying he’s actually so scary thinking about him makes me wanna CRY#EWHWHEHEW I HATEEEE PIERCE#this is all /lh but also. i’m scared of that man. you guys are not ready :) hehehe#wyrms says stuff#pierce oc
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#first piece of new art :)#new iPad alert gonna b so annoying w the posts for a min here probably#me fighting my demons#bugthots#2023 more like 202threlapse#slings and arrows amirite#haha#get pierced idiot#also getting ready to like take 2 on a bunch of momentous life stuff#that I was too menthol ew to succeed in the first time around#sure do hope I fuck up less this time <- person who is afraid of fucking up more#this is all negative sounding bc I’m scared first but I’m also hopeful second#it’s just scary bc it’s important to me which is a good thing#wow tag vent almost as good as therapy look at that progress now I gotta work on Believing It#just like Naruto always says#i think#cw blood
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Depending on how the next few hours go, my mom might be getting a new liver this morning. It’s one of those things she won’t know for sure until they actually wheel her into pre-op, so… we’ll see!
#theyve got the organ all lined up buuut it’s ‘at risk’ and they need to be sure#aaaand there’s all kinds of little things that can make it unviable. shit it could be too big for the cavity. who knows.#so… maybe… maybe not… 🤷🏻♂️#she’d been in the hospital already for the last few days & was getting ready to leave when a nurse ran in and stopped her with the news#…. so… yup… kinda worried. kinda really worried.#she needs it bad but she’s also been sick and surgery like this is always scary#she could bleed out on the table and I’d never get to talk to her again.#fuck I’m scared#…. so we’ll see…#also it’s my brother’s 16th birthday today!#just throwing that out there. I love that little dude.#this is way way too much personal information#you can ignore this#also I love you big kissies forever for you#text
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I would like to sleep but global warming decided that we need tropical storms nowadays in northern Germany and it’s one of the scariest thunderstorms I’ve ever witnessed in my life so far.
#it’s 4 am and I’m tired but I cannot sleep because it’s so fucking loud and bright outside#like there’s lightning that keeps shining within milliseconds wtf#it’s white light#brighter than the sunniest day ever#it’s crazy and scary#like I feel like I’m ready to meet some higher being tonight#I’m just 0_0 since it started around midnight#they even used the damn bomb warning sirens from ww2 to alarm people to get inside asap before the storm began#man#crazy weather#golden thoughts
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