#this is so incedibly funny

[kazville]

lizzie: i need you to bang bam me in the bunker

grian: so-sorry wha-

jimmy: oh- .. don‘t tell joel

*grian laughs in disbelief*

[crow0king]

some more of a doodle dump (and some lore, if you can read it :/) of these two middle aged men.

the 15–16-year difference is because after the murder case (Nathan killing the mayor with a cult controlling him) he was sent to an isolated cabin in the mountains to serve his sentence and do rehabilitation (a therapist came by every week/2 week and Johnny came by every week to check on Nathan). Nathan couldn't be placed in a prison because he'd just manipulate and take over the prison.

they placed him in the cabin not only for that but also because he hated the woods and hated having to get himself dirty (because he needed to chop wood and somewhat farm; every so often the gate guards would deliver him approved foods/seeds).

there was then......THE BLIZZARD INCEDENT..............(that'll be revealed later however)

[terriblevirgothozul]

[porter-pumpkim]

Ngl I find it funny with like

Fan aus where test tube has a job co workers,

If we say test tube had a job at some point around season 2, that means that at some point she didn't make it to work for a bit and when she came back was like "oh yeah, turns out im an artificial being and got deleted for a bit, then we had to deal with the aftermath, sorry bout that!" When last time her excuse was kidnapped to compete, which wasn't a lie,

So now her co workers are wondering if she just has wild excuses or if she's being honest and just has the weirdest life ever

Or, post show, test tube is just casually talking about her life experiences to a co worker, and just brings up shit like "so i made a makeshift rocket out of a vending machine" and "oh yeah! I made a time machine once, kinda turned into a dimension hopper after a timeline incedent though"

Like, to any normal person this woman tells wild ass stories and just casually makes things that should be impossible

[radiodust-heart]

Alastor isnt a fan if tv of any kind. But Charlie started having movie nights were once a week someone picks a movie for them to watch. Her choice was rather heart felt and had her crying while no one really paid attention.

Vaggies pick was a movie about animals finding a way home. She just liked it was her comment.

Lucifer presented a musical about himself and a carnival he thought was funny.

Husker picked the first movie in the pile which ended up being a princess movie

Nifty picked a story about a bunchnof short stories that came together in the end. Each one more horrific then the last.

When it was Angels turn they all gave him a rule, no porn. So instead he set everyone up to watch heraditary/midsomer (havent figured out which ine would be funnier) the movie captured everyones attention, the film becoming worse as it went on but no one could look away. The whole time Angel grinned as he watched the movie. He ended up turning to Alastor who was situated beside him, whispering facts he knew about the movie and cult history hed picked up over his time.

Alastor enjoyed the growing horror of the group. But not as much as Angels consrent chatter. He had alot to say and it was all fascinating. He missed most of the movie as he was paying attention to Angel but the man recapped for him as the movie came to a gruesome close. With unsettling deaths and a cult celebrating the ritual. The room was clearly unsettled and nausiated all despersing at the end of the film.

Alastor didnt get a chance to pick a movie as movie nights were firmly canceled after the incedent but it was worth it. Instead he ended up chatting with Angel for the rest of the night on history of cults, illnesses, canniblisim.

Angel was a horror fanatic and when he found out Alastor was a cannible he had a million questions on the life style which Alastor was pleasently surprised. Use to peiple being creeped out by him at the knowledge. Counterly when Alastor found out Angel was a drag queen he had many questions himself on the artisty of the life style.

Charlies exercise did work to bring the resedence closer just not the way she thought

[avatar-legends-confessionblog]

I wish they would because it'd be funny as fuck but it might kill the mod

Lets put this in terms you might understand. Im going to repeat what you said, and then make a Katara 'critcism' of equal value

zk: aang is kind of inattentive and gets distracted easily

"Katara is kind of mean and gets really prideful and self-righteous"

These are two things Aang does, and two things Katara does, but if we made this Katara's entire fucking personality, that would be anti Katara

zk: aang yelling at toph was kinda shitty

"Katara making the blind comment at Toph was kinda shitty."

"Katara saying Sokka didnt love their mom like she did was kinda shitty."

The statement about Aang is true, as are these statments about Katara. If we were to call Katara a bad friend because of these, or toxic, or bring it up as reason that Katara isnt deserving of Aang, that would be anti Katara

zk: aang getting so jealous at the idea of Katara being with someone else that he would go into the Avatar state is kind of problematic

"Katara getting so jealous of Aang she says shes not going to come watch him ride the unagi to make sure hes okay is kind of problematic"

Neither of these statements are true. Both are ignoring the larger context and making their behavior out to be jealousy when its not. Aang was upset about the play as a whole. His comment about the avatar state was clearly not a literal thing, but him trying to express how upset the play as a whole has made him. Katara was upset Aang was being irresposible and letting the praise get to his head and didnt want to come watch him show off.

Aang doesnt even show any jealousy in this scene, zutara shippers just like making it about themselves. Aang doesnt mention Zuko once. Hes not thinking "Katara might have feelings for someone else" hes thinking "I dont know where I personally stand with Katara as she has been sending mixed signals." Which is, frankly, reasonable, even if he went about trying to express this in the wrong way. Thats not jealousy, thats a basic desire of wanting someone to communicate with you.

Painting Katara's frusteration and refusal to care about the potential of Aang getting hurt as just toxic jealousy would be anti Katara.

zk: here's a fic where aang faces consequences for burning Katara

Now, before I go into this one, lets remember the real consequences Aang faced, like getting jumped and slammed into the ground, like feeling so guilty as to swear off something he needs to save the world, like this incedent shown to be one of the things that haunt Aang the most when hes opening his chakras. Like this insident (incident? Im not looking it up rn) literally being the context in which he allows Zuko into their lives as he believes Zuko can help teach him firebending in such a way as to avoid ever hurting someone again.

Heres a list of things Katara did and did not face consequences for: abandoning Aang along with Sokka because Aang withheld a map for a few hours, stealing a waterbending scroll and sneaking to use it despite agreeing not to and putting everyone in danger, (she got saved and still got to keep the scroll, even made it very obvious she felt no remorse for this, I consider that not facing consequences), making Aang think Appa was sick, telling people Aang is the avatar because shes proud of it despite that putting Aang in danger many times, encouraging Aang to throw himself at problems with no help like Hei Bai and the NWT invasion, stealing appa after Aang said he did not want her to.

If someone were to write a fic where Aang's mistakes are ignored, and these mistakes of Katara's were emphasized and used as reasoning shes not good for Aang, to the point where they add consequences that didnt happen but could have happened, like Aang getting captured and/or hurt in order to make her feel guilty, that would be, say it with me, anti Katara.

When someone ephasizes or exaggerates a characters flaws while ignoring their good deeds and qualities, that is being anti, not fair criticism, especially if they do it while ignoring most of the flaws and mistakes another character has made and treating them as near perfect and a victim of the first character.

Most zutara shippers are not interested in analyzing the show for the sake of fair criticism of characters. If they were, they would be pointing out Katara's mistakes just as often as Aang's. They are only interested in justifying their dislike for Aang.

X

[aielylois]

isn't it funny how we give gods blood? how we give them the life force that flows through us even though they are supposed to be the source.

in all our stories and ballads we show their pulse, spill their guts. a reminder that we can make them bleed if we wanted to. a reminder that they can also be hung to dry.

isn't it fun to thumb the pressure point? feel the bob of an adam's apple on a god who created it. what came first - the apple or the pulse?

it is through our lives that the gods are granted immortality. they say ichor runs through their veins but no one ever told you that ichor tastes a lot like ink.

so wet the nib. prepare the parchment. be ready to carve flesh from words and don't stop until the ink bleeds through the page and stains your fingertips.

-after this incedible poem by @glasswaters, ylm

[the-friendly-entity]

[ ~"For Each Other"~ ] - Persona 5

You are student of the Shunji Academy, you been transfert it due a incident you been acused it, even so you new and Autistic you made friends with someone

See for more context: Takuto Maruki x Reader

What contains? Autistic Reader, Sensitive Content, Persona 5 Royal Spoilers?

Can be visualized as? Can be take you are part of the Phantom Thieves or not, Can be take you are in Ren Amamiya Place (Ren Amamiya is a Self Insert Personification), Friends Relationship

Sinse you arrive to the Shunji Academy, everything feels so fast is been still hard to proces and adapt it, the new school is way bigger the one you was before, and the city you live now it will be hard to learn it, is overwhelming

you firts day at school alredy you was drowing on nervous, you alredy saw it but its not the same, you still have a lot to learn to even map in your head the school entired

even so you thougth you will be alone in this journy, as you get use to it due no one was interested to make friends with you becuse you "weird" and "annoying" in your old school, it will be not much diferent now you have a incedent no ones wants to be with you at all

but surprisly, you meet someone that change your mind, a guy name Ryuji Sakamoto, you two meet in a rainy day in they way of school, waiting it calms the rain so you two could arrive to school

at firts he was well, as everyone see him, a someone problematic, he try to talk to you when you two got near profesor Suguru Kamoshida as see you not comfortable at all arround him, but as you know, you mind blocked the posibility to talk, so you could not respon him back, and due his body lenguaje show nothing but agresion you was scared he could be problematic

but was nothing as you expected, he actully a sew a funny guy, a little dummy even but have his heart in the right place even his way to act dont show it, he could see you was not ok being in school and how so much you was struggling, he always ask you if you are ok or need something or if you need to go outside to breath due how bad school was affecting you, slowly growing a bond

you was still mind blocked at firts so Ryuji Sakamoto only make questions are yes or no for more easy for you, or not even at all, just talking knowing you are hearing him, he dont want to force you to talk! so you ok to be just quiet and lising, he smiles when he get you out a smile or small laughts

He surprised you actully like to study, he trying to understand why as he seeing it as boring and waste of time, but he not judge you for it mostly he wants to understand your way of what it special, even so he really apreciet when you help him with something! even do his homework (tho he dont like to make you work for him but you really are appacionet to do homework)

He happy you like to ejercise as well! he go easy on you tho, he dont want to make you work hard on yourself and something happen to you, more when you a little more slow that him, but it dont matter! passing time ejercise it what he appreciet

Tho one time a group of students who was ejercising as well come to you two to make problems, Ryuji Sakamoto was the one who jump fast to defend you when they trying to force to talk and insulting you, it was not he was ready to really use violence when you spoke saying "Leave" as you dont look good, making sure to go a quiet and lone place to help you to feel better after what happen

You apreciet a lot Ryuji Sakamoto, he was the firts person who really step up to protect you, as no one ever made it before, not even taking so patient to you and understand you, or just care in general, it just was there to calm you down as tears fall from your eyes

as more time pass with Ryuji Sakamoto you slowly open up yourself, able to finally talk to him, simple words to fully talking, he was happy to finally hear your voice and talk normally arround him, tho sadly you mind blocked when is in school and places you mind not allowed you to talk, but he dont mind, he alredy deal with you when you not talk at all, this is not diferent

you show him things you like, make him understand better the school subjects and the homework, and well, you quiet the opositive of what he meet you, you now like a talking parrot look like give sugar and will not ever end, when you noticed it you shyly apologuies for it and being weird and annoying, but he dont find it at all like that, he want you be yourself and comfortable

He even noticed this things you do, like the "T-Rex" arms, the shaking arms and legs when you so exited and happy about something, and when you just looking at the nothing kida worried you just there doing nothing, he start to look in the internet about Autims to understand you more and these behavors and such

He even gift you a Cancelling sound Headphones so you could be comfortable in school, sadly you only use it limited time but its just a amazing gift, he was so surprised you hug him so thight and make him happy you was happy

There time you want to be alone to try to recover, he understand it, you need to recharge and put yourself back toguether after a roug day, but he always near if you ever need something or can rush to help you if you need it

The time you had a breakdown he was full of worried, he read about Autism people suffering of breakdwon when they reach they limited, but he never expected to be this badly, he advoid you hurt yourself or others and try to only and only see him and hear him, keeping close to him and hugging you to try to calm you, fastly trying you two be alone so you be fully comfortable and no one else see you two

He Relief when you go out of the school hospital you was ok, he wanted to understand the situacion better and what caused you to happen it, even you apologuies for you behavor, he denied it, it was not your fault, you was put in a tense situacion, like a ballon full of a room of needles where eventually gonna pop, he will never judge you to act that way becuse he understand you just could not hold it anymore

After that he become a little overprotective with you, looking others badly and always being on front, you understand he just trying to protect you but, its a little to much, he apologuies for it, he not see you as a weak person who can do stuff for his own, i mean, danm you alredy have to deal a lot of shit and you still up he admired that of you, he just want to do anything to keep you safe

You two chat a lot in the phone, is where mostly you are yourself, you guys will be talking for hours and always chanching topics hop into another, sharing memes and even making plans and such, it feels nice to have Ryuji Sakamoto where you can be your fully youself

You even start giving him gifts too, mostly drawings you made about him, you think sometimes to buy him stuff but purely the best way to show you import someone a lot is by doing it yourself the gift, he craaazy! he amazed how you draw him and he cant just thank you enough for such amazing gift, i can make sure your drawings are in his room walls like photos

When you get into mementos, well was chaotic, Ryuji Sakamoto was absotluly worried when you two arrive here, mostly you seeing you panicking confused of what is going on and near moment to just pass out, he was there to help you to get out of such situacion

if you not was part of the team Ryuji Sakamoto had a very hard time to understand you where you was and what was everything, he mostly feel unresposible to put you in such dangerous place even when was out of his control, he will anserw all your questions, even the most unlogical ones, but he want to make sure you are ok and keep you calm

he will REFUSE if you want to be part of the team, is such dangerous place! and he just cant put someone he cares a lot in such situacion, not becuse just the shadow, but a lot of stuff they get themself into, it just a lot dont think you could leave well

if you persona wakes up, he maybe let you help in the team, but he always in your side anything happens, even so he proud you put yourself in risk for help others, even he dont wants it becuse you want you safe, he admire that fire into you

you two are like siblings, Ryuji Sakamoto being the big one who always there to keep your safe, even he a little dumb and can make some mistake can accidently hurt you, he defently a loyal person in heart and will do everything he can to make you happy, and the exchange is equal

is almost hard to see you two get appart of how strong your bond you two have, even if something you guys fight, both always come back toguether, not matter what

[ray935sworld]

HIII RAy!! Sooo happy bday again i brouight you a little gift(it really is little im so sorry i couldnt do more im incredibly tired, you deserve the best)!!!

Lil pedrenzo doodle just for you!!! Hopefully soon very soon you will get a bigger gift for now here are the little pookies!! I hope you had an incedible day i love you sosoososos much MWAH big big kisses!!!!!!!!!<333333

ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? OH LOOK AT THEM. THEY ARE PERFECT LITTLE CUTIE PATOTIES. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU. ELLE OMG I LOVE YOU SO MUCH THEY ARE PERFECT

Look at the slightly insane look in Dani's tiny eyes and HIS BIG SMILE. That's him. That's so on brand him AND JORGE - Jorge is so in love. (slightly scared what Dani is planning but stupidly in love)

And the grey hair - I love it. I could look at it forever.

In short they are absolutely adorable and I am once again absolutely bazzled by your ability to make a little funny looking doodle so perfectly pedrenzo that my heart exploses. I. Am. Impressed.

I love you sosososososos much and a biiiig kiss right back at you and I hope you're having a GOOOOOD rest. Sleep well! ❤️

[dangooverflowers]

Give us a funny incedent that happened to you and your buddies.

If you have one for :

Ibiki

Hayate

Genma

Shizune

Kakashi

Guy

“I’ll do you one better; I have a story that features all of the above, sans Hayate, and it all starts with Gai. Surprised yet?”

“After his surgery, word got around pretty quickly that he’d never walk again. It was a damning sentence. You know Gai; he lives and breathes physical conditioning, so you can imagine how crestfallen we all were to hear that he’d never leave his wheelchair. We all assumed he’d be inconsolable too, so we figured we’d do everything we could to help him adjust to this new way-of-life. After all, he’d always kept the lot of us going through the bad times, so it was time to return the favor.”

“As soon as we’d heard, Ibiki, Genma, and I put our money together to buy him some flowers. Kakashi must’ve gotten the same idea about cheering him up, because we met him at the lobby of the hospital. Imagine our surprise when we walk into Gai’s room and find him bound to his wheelchair, neck, wrists, legs, you name it. The wheelchair is locked in place, and he’s parked right next to the window, fear set in his eyes. We’re all confused. Suddenly Shizune just slides into the room with that pig of hers in her arms, congenial as can be.”

“Turns out that Gai, being Gai, had kept trying to hold wheelchair races at the front of the hospital when he really should have been resting his body. Shizune said it was the only way to ensure that he’d stay in his room, but the jury’s still out on that one. I will say this: Ibiki was so impressed with her handiwork, he thought about asking her to teach new recruits how to tie those knots.”

[puppytreatsheart]

cw// brief mentions of attempted sui, DV

(westley belongs to my oomf, daegen is me)

self insert x oc type shiet

it was 7 am and westley was still on his computer. he turned off his 6 other monitors hours prior and kept his single one running. he was browsing random shit. looking at craigslist ads and so forth. he saw the morning sun peak through his blackout curtains. his boyfriend daegen would sometimes open it up time to time to let some sun in. westley hated it when he would do it, sometimes even yell at him to close it. right now though, daegen is sleeping on his bed. well... he likes to call it their shared bed.

westley could feel his eyes drag and he sat back. looking at his ceiling. he took a deep sigh and turned off his monitor screen. he usually left it run even when he was asleep. it was oddly comforting to hear it click and hum while he slept. he stood up, his legs were aching and he felt like he was about to drop. most times he would be sleeping on the couch just to get some rest but... he didnt want to sleep there for the time being.

he shuffled to his room and stood by the bed. his boyfriend was dead asleep, blanket covering his head, and sleeping clutched together in fetal position. westley peeled back the blanket and watched him flinch and his eyes shot open. the sight tugged at his heart which was odd for him. he felt... sad. usually hed find it funny to watch dae jump in his skin and flinch even if westley just slightly moved. but to watch him be on guard in his sleep was sad.

daegen tried to sit up and westley stopped him. "hey hey hey... you dont need to leave... i was just about to climb into bed with you," he said and watched him lay back down. westley took off his glasses, setting it on the night stand, and then proceeded to get under the blanket with him. he faced him, despite it all being blurry. he kissed him on the head and felt daes breathing hitching and nuzzling into the pillow a bit. wes brought up his hand... gently caressing dae on the cheek, which he flinched again to his touch. just... watching him sleep peaceful.

he could torment him right now if he could, and he wanted to. but the other part just wants to enjoy this moment. to enjoy that dae can trust him enough to not be hurt in this moment. to hear him softly breathe and his heavy eyes can rest without being tortured. he didnt know why he enjoyed hurting him. maybe it was knowing dae would always come back to him no matter how much damage he would do to him.

his fingers caressing daes hair, his own eyes becoming heavy and he couldnt stop thinking about him. just to see him smile, just to see him cry, just to see him in the same vicinity as him was just what he wanted in this life. its not that he doesnt care about him. hes scared of losing him. hes scared of being abandoned. he likes that dae will take care of him even if westley beats him an inch away from death. he doesnt like doing it but he cant help it.

he could feel his own heart start hurt and his eyes swell. he saw exhausted he made him become. how sick he looks and how he looks like a corpse. even with the fact he cant see shit at the moment, it still hurt him inside. he wish he could stop, he wish he wasnt such a monster. but he couldnt help it to push daegen over his limits. to watch him go into so much distress to where hes a danger to himself and to westley as well. there was a time he was almost successful to push him over the edge when westley started berating him while driving and next moment, daegen jumped out of the car while it was moving. for months wes would call him stupid for that attempt and consistently mock and bring it up every time they had an argument. or the time daegen stabbed westley in the hand and forearm with a meat fork. him and daegen didnt fight for almost three months after that incedent.

but wes watched dae sleep. everything hurt him. he could feel his tears drop onto his pillow. he etched his face closer before kissing daegen softly on the lips. his breathing quivering and his fingers shake until he held his face. he was saying things under his breath, like some sort of prayer. he began to slink his arms around dae's body. pulling him close to hug him as he slept. westleys eyes were closed at this point when shifting dae to be on his chest. his body weight pressing up against his and he hugged and held him. feeling dae breathe softly on his neck. it tickled him a bit, but in a comforting way. he could feel his head drift to sleep. he gave dae one last kiss before going to sleep on his own along with him.

he felt an odd peace right now, and he wishes this never would end. its all he ever wanted in his life. its all he needs in life and he couldnt be more calmer. his mind drifted as his muscles calmed and his breathing was in unison with his boyfriend. he felt everything level out for once, he couldnt be more thankful for dae to stick with him.

[catdragonstella]

Vexeneer Marmur

Gender: male

Height: 8"7'

Wing length: 9"1'

status: former soldiers

Age: 31

Hobbies: pulling pranks, traditional dancing, ceramics (even though he's bad at it) and hanging out with friends

Worship gods: Marmura, Oculus, Ascention and Sol

Design and personality

Marmur is acrobatic and fast guy, even with his fluffy wings. He has funny and extroverted personality and he always got himself in trouble as a kid. He was even nicknamed as "Jester of the family". He's incedibly smart and cunning with strategy. He's missing his left hand and he's blind on his right eye. On his hand he has a charm with gems called Selena tears from his twin sister Mura.

Story details

Marmur is a really interesting individual. He is from family of five children. He has two older sisters by 5 and 3 years, a few minutes younger twin sister and a 9 year younger brother. He works as soldier and his sisters and brother works as an nurses. One day he was tasked to go with other soldiers on exploring mission around the area that had suspicious actions. Before he left, his twin sister Mura begged him not to go, because her tarot cards told her this mission will ended up in tragedy. He waved her off and said her hobby of playing with silly cards is nothing but silly nonsense. She was at least able to give him her charm with gemstones called Selena tears so he could be protected when nights comes. He left with his group and turns out she was right. They were ambushed by bandits that catch vexeneers to sell them at black market for their wings, or to slavery. Marmur lost his eye and hand in combat, but he got away. Everyone else was caught, even Marmur's lover and fiance Solon. He was able to get back to his home and explain everything to other soldiers. Feeling quilty he decided to find his love and other soldiers and safe them. The bandits had visible symbol of a specific dark market called obsidian den on their clothes, so he decided to go found this market and get everyone back home. With his weapon and bag with supplies he left a single note for his twin and family and started his journey.

(Vexeneers belongs to @clock-onyx. Please go support their work. They are amaizing artist.)🫶

[storiesofsvu]

For fun, 30 minute shows: Ghosts is an enjoyable, easy watch. I've only seen the American version, also I haven't seen the whole thing, but what I have watched has been delightful. Also, I've heard Heartstopper is great. I haven't personally watched it, but my sister LOVED it.

These aren't 30 min "upbeat" shows, but my all-time favorite series are The Magicians and Sense8, and they are the ONLY reason I still have a Netflix subscription. These are a bit darker (although still has plenty of funny scenes) and just heal my soul anytime I watch them.

For movies: you can never go wrong with Princess Bride. Alternatively, Robin Hood Men in Tights with Cary Elwes is hilarious.

Oooo thank you so much!!!😍✍🏻✍🏻✍🏻

Omg YES!! Incedible movie choices!! Ive got men in tights on dvd! I love it!

[ghoul-bunny]

Because @sm-baby is a bad influence and made me pick up my priest tadc au again

It's based on those early 90s weird christian games

It's all within a church and any area surrounding it

Pomni is not a real angel, she is a tree decoration angel so she looks kinda tacky, the halo around her head is tied with wire which became crooked as she fell into the church, she tends to put it back straight but it will always go crooked again seconds later.

Caine is obssessed with her to an unhealthy degree (she's kinda into it tbh) he just constantly wants her around and to be able to touch 'his angel'

He was at one point sane and a normal priest but after a spefic incedent he started losing it.

Able is Caine's brother who 'died' he did not really die, he has an apple for a head and caine has teeth, you can do the math here.

Able was a sheperd that was favoured by the other NPCS (Jax espically) Caine grew jealous of this and removed him.

Able isn't dead and just kinda stays out of the way now, the others and Caine thinks he is dead so Caine's sanity started to slip when he would 'see' Able.

Jax is a sheep/lamb and was close to Able, were they lovers? besties? idk but I thought about them to hard once so u can make the connection.

Ragatha is the new shepherd, having entered just a little after Able's 'death'

Jax does not get on with her and in fact does a lot to put himself into danger (thus a sacrfical lamb) just because he finds it funny how much she panics.

Zooble is basically a demon to Caine, the idea was based on one claymation I watched a longggg time ago of something where the satan character kept changing shapes and such.

Caine prolly takes a lot out on Zooble so they tend to just keep to themselves in there room.

Bubble is to be a snake that is often around Caine's neck, I think there colourings would shimmer and change like water in oil (or like a bubble)

Kinger and Queenie are adam and eve. Queenie abstracted shortly after some kind of event that got the both of them in trouble, Caine calls the abstraction her punishment.

Kinger used to be of sane mind and would prolly cause some mischief with queenie, often breaking the games 'rules' I think in the real world the two them were prolly similar to activists for w/e orgnization, rule breakers, this line of work somehow got them in the game.

After Queenie abstracted tho kinger's mind snapped, he often forgets days, months or even where he is. He keeps a notebook on hand with Queenie's notes but if you asked him who wrote them he couldn't give you an answer.

Gangle was orignally going to be the satan type character but I think I'd like to do something with her that gives her more of a prophet type status. She's overly cautious and is quick to point out dangers of shit happening and caine like "nah it's fine" and then shit happens so Caine now straight up just thinks the word of God is being spoken to her.

I think she'd be hyper aware of when someone is about to abstract, she can tell the changes and Caine is seeking her advice to know often, she's scared of what he'll do if she dosn't tell him.

Abstractions are demons basically, when Caine is informed that someone is going to abstract he acutally then proceeds to pin them to a cross. He does this because he truly believes doing so will help them, he thinks the lord will have mercy on them as they did Jesus and will return them to there prior state, this has yet to work and in fact seems to make the abstraction happen faster.

Once abstracted Caine just claims they didn't repent enough and were made into a demon.

Pov ur Pomni falling into the church for the first time

[theo-the-cat-guy]

Honestly, as someone who's very antitheist and particularly anticatholic, I want to try reading the catholic bible. I've seen a few of the stories from it and some of the wording is completely rediculous and incredibly funny (like the lines about dashing infants against rocks, it's a horrific atrocity but it's so incedibly funny)

So I'm doing my triennial read of the Bible for reasons (don't sweat it) and I'm currently on Numbers (chapter 11). And boy is there a whole lotta numbers. Slaps Bible, this thing can hold SO MANY numbers.

Also apparently I never paid attention at all to anything what was said on all my previous reads? I'm paying attention now tho because this time your lad's taking ✨notes!✨

[xoxo-ren-xoxo]

Unpopular Opinion /lh /rp

Talking about dSMP character’s heights and sort of their body types? Not in a weird way just in a ‘how I imagine them’ way. Loosely based off of their irl heights, but some of them I don’t know, so it’s mostly guesswork and vibes. Also if you disagree you’re wrong. (Just kidding leave your ideas in the tags/replies)

Obviously this is all roleplay/character stuff. None of it is intended to be weird or to reflect on the irl people! I’m just having fun with headcanons :)

Tommy is 6′3 and very very lanky. This child is not short. Stop drawing him short. He’s taller than Techno. He’s not as tall as Wilbur, but he’s tall. He towers over most people. Emphasis on most because everyone is so tall on this server what the hell? 

Anyway I think the mental image of this super tall kid actively trying to make himself look shorter/smaller is heartbreaking. Like imagine him curled up into a corner trying to make himself as unnoticable as possible in Logsted. Imagine him slouching when living with Techno to try to make himself seem like less of a ‘problem’. Imagine Dream telling him that he’s a ‘big strong man’ and that he shouldn’t need help, he can defend himself, so when he goes back to Tubbo, he tries to make himself look *tiny* as a cry for help. He wants comfort.

But he’s also incedibly skinny. Back in L’manburg and Pogtopia, he developed some muscle from all the fighting. His shoulders broadened out and he looked slightly intimidating. But like most teenage boys, he was still lanky as hell. This only got worse when he was exiled to Logstedshire, with little food (and no drive to eat the food, or get up, or exersise) he became more malnourished and he just looked *small* despite being 6′3. This probably isn’t helped by the constant use of golden apples when he moves in with Techno, which give him energy and strength but no real nutritional value. Techno was just trying to get the kid to eat normally. When he finally stands at his full height, Techno is shocked that he didn’t notice all the slouching.

Anyway Techno is 6′2. He’s taller than a lot of people but not as tall as his brothers. He makes up for this with muscle and strength and a healthy body. Wow, the only healthy person on the server. Amazing. You love to see it. Good for him. He could win in a battle of raw strength against anyone else on the server. He’s quite broad, which makes him look bigger generally.

Wilbur is 6′5 and also he is a stick. Just. Straight up and down stick. Nothing there! He is just a pale sickly stick. This gets worse the further into the timeline you go. When claiming L’manburg and fighting in the war he starts to get insomnia, causing him to look like a corpse half the time. When in Pogtopia, he’s too busy to take care of himself properly, so he only looks worse and worse. His hair is a mess, his skin is far too pale, and he only eats enough to be able to hold his own in a short fight. There’s a reason he doesn’t wear armour or really try to fight at all. He’s subconciously self-destructive, then actively so when he blows the place to the ground. He’s always been too busy for self-care.

Ghostbur is a much more healthy, younger version of Wilbur. I would say he’s ‘water rising’ era Wilbur. The life returned to his body, in a morbid kind of way. He’s still tall but he prefers to make himself seem shorter just to be less threatening.

Phil is 5′11. He has an average build, with slight muscle from the years of playing in hardcore. He’s older, now, but he can still kick your ass. Also, he taught Techno how to fight smart, not hard. He doesn’t need to be super strong because he’s intelligent enough to outwit most people on the server. He has a wordly knowledge that others don’t possess. He also has wings, large and grey, clipped so he could get onto the server (there is a no flying rule after all).

Fundy is... 5′10, just a little shorter than Phil. His fox genes make him smaller, despite his father being 6′5. He’s got a healthy, svelte build. He’s sneaky and light on his feet. In the wars he built up some muscle, but it was quickly lost since he prefers to take a backseat to any fighting outside of those times (especially now) and he’s built for spying.

Schlatt is an interesting one because a lot of people are gonna fight me on this, but he’s not actually old. Everyone calls him old but honestly I think he’s younger than Wilbur (in canon, I feel like Wilbur is in his late 30s, early 40s, simply because). I think Schlatt’s around 35-ish, but he looks older due to his shitty health. People call him an old man either to demean him or because they see his actions and appearance and go ‘yeah, this guy is old’. Which is fair enough, because irl Schlatt and c!Schlatt both act like they’re from the 1950s.

This guy looks like shit by the end, but he looks alright at the start. Slicked-back hair, sharp ram horns, golden animalistic eyes. He’s intimidating. And loud. Then everything shifts, right towards the end. He’s frail and deteriorating throughout his short presidency, and by the end of it he’s practically a corpse, just like Wilbur.

He’s 6′3, with broad shoulders and a silhouette that seems strong not only because he carries himself as if he can fight, but also because of the percieved power that comes along with it. In reality, Schlatt is a poor fighter, and the abuse he ends up putting his body through (working out excessively to try to fight his condition, and turning to alcoholism as an escape) completely destroys him, making him probably one of the least healthy and weakest people on the server. It doesn’t really show until his death scene, since he’s covered up the deterioration since day one. Basically, mans is dead. 

Glatt, or Ghost Schlatt, or whatever you want to call him, would be a healthier Schlatt. Again, from the ‘water rising’ era. I headcanon him to have longer hair in that era. Not sure why.

Ranboo is the same height as tommy, but is more naturally lithe than made that way by lack of food. His enderman DNA can be blamed for that. He’s healthy most of the time, but may have spirals where he doesn’t take good care of himself (perhaps he forgets) and he looks pretty bad. If he goes a few days without keeping up his self-care routine, he looks a lot worse than he actually is. Sleep tends to be his biggest issue, his mind keeping him awake all night and leaving him looking like shit in the morning. Really, he’s just a kid with a troubled soul, and it shows sometimes. Most days, though, he looks very well put together.

Tubbo. He’s 5′6. He’s more childlike than Tommy, which only makes it worse when he acts in the way he does in season 2. He has burn scars across one side of his body, from his execution, and he is partially blind in one eye because of it. He takes very good care of himself, since he has to look good while being president if he wants those sweet sweet approval ratings. But when he’s super stressed, he will pull all-nighters and forget to eat. He’s got a lot of issues, but his body is very normal and healthy, all things considered. 

Quackity is 5′8. Which is really funny because that’s his actual height. He’s less sharp (?) than a lot of people on the server, but he has some muscle because he’s constantly training to ‘take down Technoblade’ (in reality, it’s a habit he picked up in Schlatt’s era, and never had the heart to drop). He tries his best to stay healthy (again, to better kill Techno) and he’s careful with his life, knowing that it’s his last.

Niki is 5′5. She’s also able to kick so much ass. That is all.

Dream is a bitch and therefore I will not be discussing him. Also he’s a blob or whatever so I guess height is irrelevant. Or maybe he’s a mysterious figure with a mask. Who knows.

No one else is important enough to talk about /j (but really I’m tired so I will stop here). Put your own thoughts in the comments, tags, and rbs. This was all in good fun, so don’t get mad haha.