#this is ofc all interpretation on my part
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I loooove digging into kairi’s character, what little she’s given, so i hope you’ll allow me to give my paltry two cents.
I think you’re right to an extent. kairi and riku’s relationship, in so far as it exists, revolves more or less around sora from both sides. He’s their center point and common denominator. so riku’s fall to darkness is definitely something that’s... a sore spot between them, to say the least.
The way I read them, i think they *wanted* to be friends, and tried to be at least a good chunk of their childhoods, but the advent of kh1 really sundered what fragile connections there might have been between them (and completely legitimately. like, kairi telling sora they should ditch riku on riku’s dream project was a dick move born of fear, and riku destroying their home and everything that resulted from that is an extremely fair reason for kairi to be wary)
Kairi’s fear of change absolutely plays into her discomfort with Riku, I’d argue almost more strongly than how he treated Sora. For Kairi, change is *trauma*. Change is the destruction of Radiant Garden and everyone she knew and loved- even if she doesn’t consciously remember it, that trauma is very real and very present on her psyche. Change is danger. Change is loss.
and then there’s riku, who is desperate for anything at all to change, who is so jealous and confused and angry at his own feelings that he’s ready to change everything.
and yknow? in this instance? kairi was right. change was destruction, it was loss. it took her home, her heart, and her best friend/living safety blanket away from her. trauma x2!!
the thing about this of course is that change is natural, and life without change is a stagnant one. kairi’s resistance to change has left her floundering and unable to keep up, riku’s desperation for change resulted in the near complete destruction of everything he cared about, and a boatload of his own guilt and trauma as a result. (have i mentioned lately how much i love the way kairi and riku are inverted parallels in like. every way? because i do)
And then there’s sora, their midpoint. The one who isn’t chomping at the bit for change, but isn’t against the idea either. The go with the flow guy. Which isn’t to say his approach is perfect either; his lack of commitment meant that he didnt really call kairi out on her wanting to ditch riku, and didn’t reach out when he noticed Riku drawing away prior to kh1 (i think this was hinted at in either the novels or character files, but i dont recall for sure. correct me if im wrong!)
all three have learned and grown over the course of the series, to varying extents, but those foundations remain- and probably always will. Riku has come to terms with his darkness and his feelings, but he’s not going to stop pushing forward, he still has that pain. Kairi is still terrified of change, writing letters she never sends, backing out of saying her true feelings at the slightest resistance, but (and this is my HOPE going forward based on her decision at the end of MoM) she may be ready to start accepting that change is inevitable, and maybe if she works with that reality she can create one for herself that isn’t based in destruction and loss.
and sora... sora’s probably fine wherever riku is.
i’ve strayed a bit off track here, but returning to the crux of this post, kairi and riku feel to me as people who once had something in common, were friendly, but never quite *close*, and now that the events of kh have unfolded the way they have, they probably never will be.
And here’s the thing- that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Hear me out; kairi accepting that change is sometimes necessary and riku learning not to force things before their time puts them in a place where, for all their torrid and traumatic history, they can be cordial with each other. Someone you would call and ‘old friend’, someone you wish well for, but only see maybe once or twice a year, and are both comfortable with that. Not trying to each be something they’re not for the sake of a mutual friend, instead being their own person with their own unique connections to that friend.
Hold onto your keyboards, cause I'm about to get ✨️controversial ✨️
I'd like to preface this by saying all interpretations/ headcanons/ readings/ etc. Are valid and I'm in no way discouraging anyone to change their ways.
I watched (and enjoyed) Baloney's "The Truth About Kingdom Hearts!" And I absolutely adored their take on the series, but one line stuck out to me that I really want to expand on because I don't see it being talked about as often as it should.
Kairi doesn't like Riku.
And I think this is a very RICH and IMPORTANT aspect of the Destiny Trio dynamic. It adds to the complexity of these characters, but especially Kairi.
(Another shout out to @violethowler and their INCREDIBLE Constructing Kingdoms series. The video on"The Girl Who Never Grew Up" made me like and understand Kairi so much more. Highly recommend checking it out.)
Kairi doesn't like Riku, and with some pretty valid reasons, but I'll get to that after I compile all the evidence towards this:
In KH:
Kairi likes her life the way it is. She doesn't desire change, but Riku wants nothing but change. He wants to grow up and move on and see the outside world.
And because Sora looks up to him, Sora has jumped on the bandwagon too. Kairi is going along because Sora is. But it is clear that for Kairi, change =/= good. So what does she say?
"You know, Riku's changed."
Sora asks her how, and she kinda bites her tongue. Clearly she had opinions, but doesn't want to badmouth Soras best friend to him. Later she says, "Sora, don't ever change."
Later, after everything, when Kairi is restored and in Travers Town, she doubts that Riku can be saved, despite the fact that she LITERALLY saved Sora from being a heartless. She almost seems like she's trying to convince Sora not to go, or to at least let her come with-- not to save Riku but because she wants to be there with Sora.
At the end of the game, she obviously return to destiny islands and draws the paopu.
During Chain of Memories, everyone forgets about Sora, but the memories of Riku stay intact. For a year. Kairi is well aware that her "friend" is missing. In fact, last she knew of him, he was still taken by Ansem and presumably dead or at least suffering. She doesn't know.
She knows she's a Princess of Heart and has powers thay can help (as she restored Sora after being a heartless). But the most we get is "he's far away, but I know we'll see him again." Like, do you?
I mean, SELPHIE is the one that says "I sure miss him." That's way more than we EVER get from Kairi.
So for a YEAR, she doesn't spare Riku a single thought. But the SECOND she remembers Sora, she is willing to do anything to see him again.
Here's a little bit of speculation for WHY she doesn't like Riku:
1) Perhaps when she first met them as kids, he reminder her of Xehenort, who kidnapped her and yeeted her into space.
2) Kairi wanted to be best friends with SORA, but not Riku. She's afraid that Sora will follow Riku to the outside worlds (where she doesn't want to go) and leave her behind. If it wasn't for Riku, Sora wouldn't want to leave at all.
3) He (as far as we know) opened the door and damned their home into Darkness. That's probably a point of contention for her. Even though Sora so forgiving.
4) He hurt Sora in KH1, but Sora is still loyal to him. She probably sees that as him taking advantage of Sora-- the person she cares most about.
5) He's the reason Sora never came home. If it wasn't for him, they would have gone home at the end of KH1 together.
I can't say for sure how Riku feels about Kairi. He DID drag her corpse around and give into the darkness to save her, but that can be interpreted as solely wanting to "beat " Sora at being the hero. Even still, we get moment in COM where he reflects on missing her. We even see Namine come to his rescue in her form. I definitely feel like there is less animosity there, but who knows.
That's all.
Roast me, Kairi stans, but I love the depth this reading gives to the story and the potential for arcs and character growth for her and she is forced to face who she is without Sora.
#this is ofc all interpretation on my part#there's certainly more commentary to be made with these two from other viewpoints#like the way kairi probably thinks they're still friends (bc she just pushes it all under the rug so as not to disrupt things further)#and riku is certain she hates him (for kh1 but also if he overheard that conversation on the dock)#so under that interpretation they are on WILDLY different pages and need to sort that out before anything can really settle between them#idk i just think theyre Neat#kingdom hearts#stop talking to yourself flight#flights tag for replies and stuff
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listen I'm not gonna be a Curly apologist he did Fucked Up as captain but I genuinely recommend ppl watch a playthru that goes thru the game in chronological order. It kinda helps clear up the events and gaps between them, bc even tho u See the times, you still experience it out of order.
The stuff Anya says definitely sets off alarm bells but it doesn't seem like he Fully Understands what she means, and I'm going to be 100% honest I think she was trying to repress it herself. This isn't to say that she is AT ALL "at fault" for what happened after and she should've gotten help even if she wasn't ready to fully discuss the issue but I genuinely think she herself was still coming to terms with things, so she didn't necessarily process the full impact before talking to Curly, and a lot of what happens occurs after they're laid off- like this delves into personal interpretation but I genuinely think Anya only registered Jimmy as a serious danger after his outburst towards Curly. Ofc my interpretation is limited bc of the limited pov in game and not having gone through what she has, but it personally reads more akin to coercion over time than a singular Obviously Violent incident (like. Not to say that Sexual Assault isnt violent in nature, just that coercion often specifically works to obfuscate the fact it is a form of violence.) The layoff is a Massive catalyst for her bc of Jimmy, in that she now has a very clear understanding of his capacity for aggression.
To extrapolate a little from the "Dead Pixel" conversation, she starts by saying she Likes The Screen (even though it's fake). While Curly has his quotes about the pixel "not ruining the illusion" which. Y'know is Symbolic Of His Flaws. She doesn't say the pixel ruins it, just that she can't get it out of her mind.
If we take the pixel to represent her Or jimmy, either way the way she talks about it kind of downplays things, like it's a Minor Thing that's Slightly Upsetting, but she's still okay with the big picture. Idk I could be 100% wrong but that is my take
Besides that, Anya tells curly she's pregnant 2 days before the crash, and it isn't until she outright states it that he starts Putting The Pieces Together. I want to note, he says "I'd do anything" and "this doesn't have to go on our performance evals" 1. Before he knows shes pregnant 2. Under the assumption she might attempt suicide, and I doubt he even thought about her using the gun on anyone else before she brings that up. He says literally before the line where she tells him she's pregnant that "being laid off isnt a reason to hurt [herself]". Like I've seen ppl talk about the performance evaluation thing like it's about her and jimmy, but I think he's referring to (his belief) that she might attempt suicide or similar which might genuinely be a consistent thing he's seen her struggle with, given she's able to go through with it. Also just to note: assuming their society is like ours (hellish) reassuring her he won't blab Abt her mental health is like. Genuine reassurance- lots of mentally ill ppl will Not Open Up bc it could have long term consequences (like. For example. On employment) ANYWAYS I hope it doesn't come off like "Curly never failed Anya" but rather "Curly approached this specific situation without the context of why Anya is panicking and (possibly validly) assuming she's dealing with a very different issue"
Also let me say again the time frame is 2 days. We don't Really see what happens, but we know Anya tells Jimmy without Curly knowing. I genuinely believe he maybe didn't do a Great Job in those two days (the fact he says Anya should've talked to Him before telling Jimmy is uhhh. Mm. 1. Your job to create an environment where she comes to you my man 2. Weird to tell her what she should do with HER OWN PERSONAL INFORMATION) but like.
I get a lot of ppl want immediate consequences but consider that they can't really get rid of Jimmy (co pilot. Which is. Y'know it's Own Problems) but also like. Curly knows Jimmy, and we know that Jimmy tends to lash out. Curly should probably Not Confront Jimmy Unless He Knows Exactly How To Keep Him From Hurting Anya. Like I'm not an expert but this is something genuinely important- when confronting an abuser you NEED to take into account the impact it can have on their victim, and sometimes for the victims safety you need to wait until you have a Solid Plan. It sucks but it's important.
And theres discussion to be had about Curly kinda going along with Jimmy saying "well what if we all died" and like. I do believe he Didn't Realize What Jimmy Said. Like he was just processing/trying to keep the situation under control (and failing because he underestimated how willing Jimmy was to hurt everyone including himself).
Like he's definitely an enabler but I would say his problems are mostly before he understands the gravity of the situation, in that he's friends with Jimmy and assumes the best of a man with abusive tendencies, and fails to create an environment that can keep Anya and the others safe. Like, he definitely doesn't handle in game events perfectly (psych evaluation for one- he does do it instead of Anya which is actually helpful, but he still treats it like. Weirdly.)
Idk I have a lot of thoughts about this game and I don't necessarily want to defend Curly but more like. Anya's situation is very delicate (and light on details) so sometimes the way ppl talk Abt it feels like they aren't actually focused on what she wants and what it means to prioritize her safety y'know?
Edit bc I just now figured out kinda how I want to word it: curly is an enabler and making things worse bc he doesn't put a stop to Jimmy's BS, but in the specific scenario we see in game I think he's trying to use his Skillset of like, people pleasing not for Jimmy's sake but for the crews (like "if I nod my head and say I sympathize he won't lash out and hurt them") which like. There are situations which that is unfortunately the safest option (on an individual level yes, but sometimes it's also necessary to prevent abusers lashing out in response toward ppl who are more vulnerable) but it was the Wrong Choice.
It's like. I think Curly was trying and had good intentions, and understood that he needed to protect the crew, but he didn't have the toolset/experience to realize he can't Just go along with things and that he needs to be able to set hard limits, even for ppl he likes and trusts. Like he failed but the failure was "for want of a nail", where it began way before what we see (for want of an understanding of power dynamics I guess.) Again, don't think this makes curly more forgivable or whatever, I just think he's a good example of trying to make the right choices when you never realized you'd have to make these kinds of decisions and therefore are unprepared and/or unaware
Second edit: personally I don't think you can really incapacitate jimmy without there being serious risk (again he's the copilot) but curly should've given Anya the gun when she told him Abt the pregnancy
#Mouthwashing spoilers#Rape ment#Suicide ment#SA ment#Yeah. Pronouns were kicking m fucking ass in this post. Names also bc I once called curly jimmy#if I write to much my brain stops cooperating with words#Idk. The way she brings up the locks in my mind sounds a little less like#Singular Incident and more. The lack of locks is a Very Important Boundary That's Missing#That feels like it often leads to the erosion of other important boundaries especially when someone abusive#Is specifically pushing those boundaries. Idk again. My take on it#And while Anya says ''i told you'' a part of me thinks she told him like. Y'know vaguely about the situation but probably didn't#Characterize it as assault (bc even if he didn't believe her I don't think he would ask ''who'' if he remembered her telling him#That his friend assaulted her) and was maybe not interpreting it as assault herself bc she was trying to rationalize it#Bc she's in a very isolated situation for over a year in a place where Two Whole Rooms Have Locks.#Realizing she was in the cockpit (has a lock) when Curly is assuming she's suicidal (or at least going to hurt herself)#And then she's in the medbay (has a lock) when she actually. Y'know#Idk I'm fully up to debate this. If someone has good reasoning why curly is actually worse than I think he is I'm all for it#I'm just trying to like. In the context of my beliefs understand the actions he takes and how they fit in within the timeframe#But legit watching a chronological playthrough helps A LOT bc like. Game is super impactful nonlinear#But like. That's not how the characters experienced it and it really fucks with the timeline of events intuitively#Anyway again. If u hate curly that's entirely understandable I just want to try and organize my thoughts while keeping#The timeline and my view of events relatively straight. Feel like there's sometimes a lil too much focus on how the men failed Anya#When we should focus on what Anya's needs and wants are. Which ofc from our POV characters are Hard bc. It's curly and jimmy#But still it's worth trying to understand her better than they do#Game that makes you think so much your brain becomes mouthwash
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OK IM FINALLY GONNA ATTEMPT TO EXPLAIN MY UNDERSTANDING OF THE WHITE DAY LORE
If something doesn’t make sense, don’t hesitate to ask. I’m sure it’ll be all over the place.
I’ll do claims then evidence (or rather headcanons + inspo)
I’ve decided to release these in parts because there’s a lot of information and I can’t neatly put them together coz I stink. So this is mostly about WD 1 and 2 with a sprinkle of 3.
1. WD 1 and 2 are part of the same kingdom, 3 is a different one.
As you can see, there is a common symbol. The sun is present in the first 2 sets.
Rui is obviously the kingdom’s sorcerer, The emblem on his belt is the same one as almost every WD 1 card. He is the only person in WD 2 to feature a sun, but Toya is the only person in WD 2 to feature a rose.
These 2 connections are enough to connect WD 1 and 2. Everything else from there you can notice similarities in uniforms. WD 3 has absolutely no connections besides Mafuyu.
I want to say everyone besides Rui in WD2 is part of the ‘Dragon Force’. Saki doesn’t have a dragon emblem from what we can see, but her uniform looks similar to the rest of the set. She also has dragon scaly looking hair ties,, thats so cool,,. I suspect her emblem is on her waist belt or something. Kaito, I need to get into more later. His connections to the first kingdom are a lot more loose than everyone else’s.
2. WD 2 is a group that go against the kingdom.
First we need to establish the sense of betrayal, and we can, all thanks to Rui. The name of his outfit is “The Mad Sorcerer” which could imply one of 2 things: He’s always been a mad sorcerer, or something recently tipped him off the edge.
For the sake of connecting everything in a more dramatic story, I’ll say it’s the latter.
Along with every other card in WD 2, Rui sticks out like a sore thumb. Why is he lumped in with everyone like that?
Simple, they needed a magic caster.
Whaatt? Am I gonna get into how I think the magic in this world works? Bit by bit ya, for now let’s just say you can cast spells on/enchant jewelry. (It makes the soldiers look very fashionable waoww!!)
Magic can look like a bunch of colors for different reasons. But focusing on RED, you can see it everywhere in WD2. That’s really important, because the only other place “red magic jewelry” is seen is on Tsukasa, Mafuyu, and Kanade.
Rui’s magic is clearly red. It makes sense his enchanted items would also be red. Miku, Saki and Kaito each have one super tiny earring/pin. Toya has an enchanted sword (and by the looks of it, more than one type of magic was used on it, goodness gracious that sword is so extra) a pin connecting to the rose, and a super tiny earring.
For reasons I will make clear later, Toya is of a higher status, therefore the kingdom has issued him a protection charm of sorts that is a more prominent part of his uniform (as opposed to an earring that can be added whenever.) If we were to assume that Tsukasa is also of a high status, the enchanted red rose would also make sense. It is an integral element of his uniform, meaning we can guess it was asked of the royal sorcerer when tsks’ uniform was being made.
The reason I’m able to distinguish Toya and Tsukasa as high ranking is because of the red cloth things that stand out.
For Tsukasa it’s a sash, for Toya, a one shouldered cape.
The fact that Rui also has a red sash type thing just solidifies to me that he’s the royal sorcerer. The way the red magicy looking things we’ve established as enchanted feel so intentional on the uniform. It was made with him in mind, I doubt he modified it himself.
Mafuyu and Kanade will be brought up again later.
As for the main point I was trying to make, there is a clear connection between everyone in this set, meaning someone within WD2 recruited Rui to aid in whatever plot they were devising.
Suspects include: Saki, Miku, Kaito, Toya and Rui himself.
Let’s inspect the cards closer.
Toya’s card has a dragon, and a castle and black ashy particles that I will assume has something to do with the dragon (technically it’s a wyvern, also I named them Rose for funsies coz Idk their actual name.)
Rui seems to be in a castle’s courtyard with bricks just about to come loose from the power of the magic.
Miku seems to be overseeing a celebration from the window of an abandoned building. (Or one that was recently fought in, though the tattered curtain tells me it’s faced more weather damage than being roughed up)
Saki is a 2* 😞
And Kaito.
KAITO.
The ash, its back.
EXAMINE THE BACKGROUND CLOSER.
It looks like an old abandoned library that’s fallen victim to the sands of time. BUT LOOK CLOSER
That candelabrum on the left looks melted. There is ash. Everything looks like it was burnt to a crisp or just severely roughed up.
That smile.. his earring has a lot more attention drawn to it than any other character in ANY set.
The GUN????!?? Like okay. I know they weren’t gonna be historically accurate, they were mixing a lot of historical things up, not to mention a whole dragon and a sorcerer. But a GUN is just very unthinkable. That came out of nowhere.
Tbh WD2 is full of surprises
The first one was like YAY kingdom fantasy au they’re all soldiers
The second they stepped it up and said DRAGON SORCERER AND GUN
The third one they were like YAYY TRANS PEOPLE AND LESBIANS
anyways back to what I was saying..
I think you can tell by now I think it’s Kaito. There is nothing else besides gloves, a jacket, a belt and a badge that connect him to this kingdom. All of these are accessories that can be acquired easily and don’t seem to be part of any solid official looking uniform.
Bringing back WD1 for a second, every single one of those cards seem to be in different battalions, indicated by the patterns seen throughout.
Hearts, Stars, Shields, Thorns, and Crest of the kingdom.
Btw roses means part of the army. (Saki’s rose is either hidden or the pattern on her cape)
According to the names of the outfits and my abysmal excuse of research, Mizuki would ride a horse, Akito would lead a cause, and tsukasa is chivalrous..
So based on that knowledge:
The lack of stars on Mizuki [(and len) i lied, len has very faint stars] tells me they are not in a position of power. And the hearts tell me they are part of a heart division (or whatever an appropriate army term would be). Perhaps it’s a small group, but Mizuki themself does not lead.
Meaning Shiho, Akito, and Tsukasa do.
Akito Leads a Battalion or division or brigade or whatever man 😭😭
And Shiho trains the newbies (thats so awesome) I can tell because Len is a squire and these 2 are the only ones with thorn details.
So if Tsukasa is a lieutenant that oversees most of these divisions, the fact that he doesn’t have thorns anywhere on his person means he doesn’t train the newbies. I guess he’s too busy being chivalrous. He also doesn’t have the dragon force emblem. That’s a special case n Toya’s already fully in charge of that.
You would not believe how long this took me to decode. I think I also for Shiho and Len, the Kingdom’s crest is SOMEWHERE on their person, ik it kinda shows on Len, but Shiho is a mystery. (Rui and Saki also adorn the kingdom’s crest on their person) also also, saki has a star on her uniform. I suspect this is because the dragon force is a small group. So while she is pretty important, she’s still not super high up.
Tangent over, back to Kaito.
All that being said. When you take a closer look at Kaito, sure he has the fashion, but the kingdom’s crest is NOWHERE to be seen. This is not an official uniform.
Miku on the other hand, seems to have a normal dragon force uniform. Black, white, red, badge. But not a rose in sight.
These two are imposters from another dimension DUN DUN DUN.
(Idk man, I’m just trying to make it interesting while giving my own au something to work off of)
So if I’m trying to imply that the vocaloids are imposters, where does that leave Len? Mwehehe secret for the story.
There’s a lot of room for betrayal here. I also appreciate how the betrayal set is all the people closest to Tsukasa. You got his 2 main vocaloids, his siblings and his director. Haha, good luck man o7
3. Card rarity.
the rarer the card, the higher their position (the faces of the events being highest of all). I did most of the talking for this in the previous point
This further pushes the vocaloids as other worldly entities agenda coz SAKI HAS A STAR, BUT THE DRAGON FORCE VOCALOIDS HAVE NO INDICATION OF LEADERSHIP AT ALL.
Scary
I probably should have mentioned that before but oh well,,,
Anyways that’s it for part 1, part two is likely going to be much shorter than this, but still impactful. Do what you will with this information :] ask me questions please it might lead me to new revelations.
AGHHHHH
#THESE ARE ALL MY INTERPRETATIONS#IF YOU DISAGREE PLZ DON’T KILL ME#ACTUALLY IT’D BE MORE FUN IF YOU CAN TELL ME WHY SO I CAN GET A NEW PERSPECTIVE#pjsk#project sekai#tsukasa tenma#akito shinonome#mizuki akiyama#shiho hinomori#toya aoyagi#rui kamishiro#saki tenma#mafuyu asahina#my head hurts so much#i really need to put this out#also it has to be in parts because the image cap is gonna explode my head#I hope it was easy to understand at least#3 long days of deciphering what things mean im beat#i took breaks tho ofc#Wel’s White Day Au#wel observes#wel analysis
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I've felt like I should check in with Apollo the past few days and finally managed to clear enough space on my floor to feel alright with breaking out the tarot deck again so I did! Lit his candle, said as as formal a prayer as I could muster beforehand, asked Hermes to help with communication, the whole shebang. For further context: I've been wanting to ask Aphrodite something specific (also via tarot, it's the most grounding tool I've got) but I only have the one deck at the moment and, while I've used it to ask Hermes about things in tandem with Apollo, and Aphrodite introduced herself via it (with a card that also introduced Apollo), I wasn't sure if it would be cool for me to use it to ask her specifically something not in direct tandem with Apollo. I mentioned that in the prayer but also said that that might be a question for a different session, since trying to get an answer to that (on top of the general "hey how are we doing/do you have anything you want me to learn") might muddy my ability to understand the message.
Cue twelve cards falling out of my deck/poking out while I was shuffling. I usually pull ~3 cards on top of whatever falls out, but I ended up not feeling like it was needed. Seven of them fell out face-up, too.
Despite having some concerns about whether all of the cards were "supposed" to be pulled, it was pretty coherent! And covered quite a few things I've been thinking about recently, including sorting out anxiety vs a warning/displeasure, a follow-up of a card that was the focus of my last pull, and a reminder to look at outside/intellectual sources to combat the whatever-the-fuck-my-brain's-on. There were four cards that fell out face-up together in a pile: a card I associate with Apollo at the front and one associated with Artemis (the Moon) at the back, with cards related to unity & growth in the middle. I'd had a pretty bad experience attempting an offering to Artemis last month and have stepped back and avoided asking her for anything or specifically invoking her in prayers/offerings/etc. since (except for once when it involved a pregnant friend b/c it seemed odd and tbh a little disrespectful to ask Apollo for help and not her as well) because I took it as a sign that she didn't want me to work with her. I'm also aware, though, that that bad experience could have just been a meltdown/panic attack. Regardless of whether it was either of those two things, a "hey slow down" warning, or a combination, it was nice to have some clear reassurance & an official introduction. It's also significant, I think, that part of the Moon card's message is about not letting anxiety/"self-deception" (direct from the guide) cloud your intuition. I've been wanting to burn the candle I dedicated to her for a few days now- it's possible that was a sign from her as well.
As far as the deck-use question...the first card that fell out was the Empress (face-up, reversed). My initial thought was that it was a "no", but I decided to look at the meaning in case it wasn't that which was. probably a bad idea. It freaked me out a bit because I couldn't figure out what it was referring to. I ended up using my alphabet oracle tiles for a makeshift yes/no system after finishing with all the other cards and got clear confirmation that my instinct was, in fact, correct.
All in all it was really cool?? By far the most cards I've had in one pill iirc, and a good lesson in identifying how my intuition works.
#i teared up a few times both during the reading#and when i connected that one of the lessons for tonight *was* about identifying intuition/pointing out my progress#ive gotta go tarot deck shopping now#ive been wanting to get decks for each member of the theoi i work with anyway. makes the most sense#my only deck atm is one a friend gave me. like. 3 years ago b/c he wasnt vibing with it and it's been pretty consistent#even if i got a bit mixed up and pulled a card i shouldnt have (ie i thought it was poking out in a 'falling out' way#instead of just a 'got jostled while shuffling' way)#the cards i *know* are supposed to be part of the reading b/c they either fully fell out or i drew them after shuffling#are typically pretty understandable#so tarot's one of the best ways i know to “talk” to deity in a way that's grounded & “outside” myself enough that I can trust it#more than other ways#esp when combining it w/ the guide. going off of the image for interpretation just doesnt do it for me. maybe it will in the future but also#my brain just. doesnt do that w/ art unless im in crit mode#but yeah. i ofc gave apollo hermes & artemis offerings afterwards as a thank you#(and aphrodite b/c i remembered that i forgot to give her an offering after i got back from lunch w/ my partner yesterday)#good day all around re: connecting with the gods#despite being off my meds (im ordering my prescription refill tomorrow)#coriander says#helpol#hellenic pagan#hellenic polytheism#apollo#artemis#hermes#aphrodite#tarot#hellenic gods#hellenic community#pagans of tumblr#theoi
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hi. for people who saw gatsby: an american myth. do you remember mckee asking nick for lunch. and then gatsby in like the next scene inviting nick for lunch. because i remember.
#not pjo#chitter chatter#when gatsby was like 'we should do lunch' i was like. hello. fucking. hello. are we. hello.#gatsby really said we just met literally 5 minutes ago. come meet my father figure. normal normal thing to do jay.#to be clear gatsby also asks him to go to lunch in the book. but like. there's a time skip. and also#in the show after mckee asks they immediately start making out on the couch. none of this ... nonsense#so the vibes are a LITTLE different in my brain.#i saw a few people say they didnt think gatsby and nick flirted enough and like while i do think that think part of it is we're#in nick's pov but not his HEAD#he DOES start singing about gatsby's smile for no reason until jordon is like. alright buddy. lets talk about daisy.#like nick was just Doing That. pull it together carraway.#but i got the vibe (JUST my take) that gatsby was like. kinda into nick. zero reason to be leaning into his space like that sir.#however when he actually MET daisy again he became kinda singularly focused on her again#i mean he built his whole lifeup to this moment#he says it at the end. he murdered pieces of himself to bring himself here. for DAISY.#him snapping back to daisy mode makes sense to me but he still reaches out for nick as a comfort in the sense that hes like#nick do NOT leave please stay with us. daisy does the same. and ofc part is that theyre really. fucking awkward. but like.#LET ME HAVE MY OWN NONSENSE INTERPRETATIONS. HES TRAPPED BY WHITENESS AND CLASS AND HETEROSEXUALITY.#hes already so much of an outsider trying to fit in. (i also think he loves daisy or an ideal at least. and she's EASIER to love. safer.)#nick inherently has more freedom even as a gay man in the sense that hes richer and white and an ivy league dude i mean you understand righ#right????????#even if its in the book i do wanna point out the parallels between those moments. im choosing to see it as deeply intentional <3#this show had a lot of repetition and parallels (see daisy and myrtle in a lot of songs and scenes)#(one i LOVE is tom giving myrtle a necklace and daisy later giving TOM her necklace in case he sees anyone he knows. idk love that shit)#im...gonna queue this#im embarrassed to talk about this show so much. so. into the queue it goes!!!#all the worlds a stage#so like. anyway. thats where i think nick's mind immediately went when gastsby asked him for lunch. personal headcanon <3#gatsby after one convo: we're doing lunch // me and nick immediately: oh ok! guess that's a date then!
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I’m fairly new to the fandom, but I do have a question if you can answer it! Why do people ship Daigo with Aoki / Masato? I tried looking to see if they’ve interacted before, but couldn’t find anything! Sorry for asking I’m just </3 dumb AND I LOVE YOUR ART OF THEM!!! Nerd looking ahhhhhh
hi ! welcome to the community i hope you're having a lovely time so far and ty for enjoyin my stuff :) no need for apologies it's a very fair question to have :]
i cant speak for everyone (all. ten people into masadai anyway) but Personally To Me i just think the idea of them together is very funny. thats quite literally it im afraid..
#snap chats#//twenty page google doc in the background// ignore that. it's mostly for comedic purposes#might also be my fault idk sorry about that. allegedly. idk ive had like three people tell me they started to ship them cause of me 🧍♂️#@mementoasts is another person who's drawn masadai and whose stuff i love and am inspod by .. i love their disneyland fic sm ...#there was another artist on twitter who posted a neat drawing of them but i cant remember who they were and i didnt bookmark it //screams//#recently there's been ANOTHER masadai artist ive started following on twitter - @wifekiryu. his account's n/s/f/w fyi before you go looking#he has a tumblr too @foxdies. i say cause i realized as much recently vjeaKLGJALKGJ#oh but I GUESS ill get deeper into why. /i/ personally ship masadai or whatever#first off they're opposing factions yet their character alignments Do Not Match their roles. stereotypically anyway#aoki who leads the 'surface' of society and is meant to be an admirable figure and someone 'just' when really. he sucks LMAO#though that's not atypical of politicians but just from a stereotypical This Is A Respectable Individual perspective of his role#daigo on the other hand leads the 'underbelly' of society- yk comprised of dangerous criminals and outcasts and whatnot#yet as we know him daigo's compassionate and considerate of his men- he doesnt treat them like tools like aoki does#if put in a room with the two daigo would be most people's choice of person to hang out with. probably open a trapdoor on aoki tbh#and i think thats really cool and epic i always love that kinda Subverting Expectations thing#theres also the fact they both started off like. edgy/angsty in the franchise and then brush up down the line#masato does a stronger 180. publicly. obviously but its still really funny they both have to get their act together#if you wanna talk about in-text reasons. there really is none LMAO I TELLS YOU masadai is pure crack#but if i wanted to pull a muscle reaching then there's daigo being on aoki's side while everyone else is on arakawa's during the funeral#im lying of course. mitsu was behind him. rgg tryna make me forget mitsu exist .... put him back in y8 ....#and ofc ichi joins that side to even out the seating but moving on another Goofy Reason is arakawa being like#'the chairman and my son are like p much the same age Surely he knows how he thinks :)'#and then i just think daigo being all smarmy about outsmarting aoki is really goofy and im choosing to interpret that as personal#they both also have issues with their dad. s. dad/s/. anyway.#tbh the google doc tag was a joke but i really could sit here and list every dumb reason why i think theyre funny together#like i started going over the tag limit so uhhhh yeah needless to say i have a lot of. dumb reasons 💀💀💀💀#one day ill use the main text for long rambles like this but todays not that day Point Is my imagination is rampant im afraid#so the short and sweet of it is I Think It's Funny. And They'd Be Terrible Together. Which Is Why It's Funny.#and the unfortunate part is anything i find funny i obsess over for a year so. //gestures to the mountain of bullshit thats my masadai tag/
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the sword and shield part of the prophecy is soooo vague that i’ll rotate every possible theory inside my silly little head and then go “or it could be smth else”. absolute net zero conclusions reached but i had fun.
#like. i think hak being the sword is one of if not the most popular theories and i can see it bc well. look at the guy#but it’s the specifics of the wording that give me pause#‘WHEN the four dragons are gathered the sword and shield which will protect the king SHALL AWAKEN’#when hak’s been there from the beginning + there’s also ik-su’s warning that hak will die if yona doesn’t find the dragons#which. there’s definitely ways to interpret him still being the sword (or shield!! that’d also be a neat twist) even with that in mind#but ngl i’m also a sucker for the idea that he’s just. there bc he loves yona. no connection to the prophecy whatsoever.#like both options make sense to me and i can see either one happening#anyway my personal favorite theory rn is that riri is the either the sword or the shield#not saying it’s the most probable option. just the most fun to meeee <3#and ngl it only occurred to me during the latest chapter bc she’s clearly gonna play some kind of role#so it’s not like i have like a mountain of compelling evidence but i do have more than just. a feeling#like she has the sociopolitical standing and the ability (or at least pluckiness) to fill either role right?#and she was introduced and grew as a character only after all four dragons were gathered#which fits with some of the only things we know about the sword and the shield#do u see what i’m getting at?? am i making any sense at all??#it could also ofc be a literal sword and shield which. tbh i think is the most likely but also less fun to speculate about#anyway i also think tae-jun will have a bigger role to play. either as a part of the prophecy or not#but also how might zeno’s recent actions impact the prophecy……. much to think about as always#but that’s enough theorizing for one day! time to grab my iced coffee from the fridge and work on my silly little fic <3#akayona
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Lesbian Stephanie Brown...oh you're so real to me
#ramblings of a lunatic#on the one hand do i think her genuine romantic interest in Tim is a really important part of her early character???#yes it contextualises a lot of her behaviour especially when you compare Tim to other men in her life who treat her far more poorly#ON THE OTHER HAND#do i think her strongest most fulfilling and most equal (and homoerotic) relationships are almost exclusively w women???#yes#do i think steph is often a victim of her role as tims love interest meta-narratively?? YES very much so (thoughts still cooking tho-#-bc i have read a lot of her appearances in robin but not all of them and not in order)#do i think that it only hits so tragically bc she genuinely likes him and wants to belong in his world (for reasons beyond tim as well ofc)#so. you see it's very complicated#like in terms of being supported by textual canonical evidence she's bi and i love that reading a lot#this is just personal to me as a dyke steph brown enjoyer. i recognise it's not the most coherent interpretation thematically#(also either way I'd like to say. steph brown transmasc. not necessarily based on canon evidence just An Idea)#(and in my mind she's specifically the kind of transmasc lesbian that is transmasc in part bc of their relationship to their lesbianism)#(yknow?)#anyway
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Another hard question.
Most out of touch and popular head Canon/theory?
(don't fell obligated to answer if you find it too controversial, no issues taken)
HAHA. Like 80% of the popular ones. As a vet of the game (and someone who, at the peak of their fixation, had 90% of the entire lore memorized (that was pre-Sumeru)), a LOT of fan theories/headcanons get popular on the rule of cool alone instead of actual probability
But here's a list of the ones off the top of my head that get on my nerves:
Pierro being related to Kaeya -> Annoys me to a rabid degree, doesn't line up with their timelines, doesn't make sense, overhyped
Dainsleif having raised Kaeya as a child -> Fun concept! Doesn't make sense with my understanding of either of their timelines, Dainsleif would have interacted on-screen with Kaeya earlier if this was the case (considering in 2/3 of the Dainquests we've BEEN IN MONDSTADT FOR PART OF IT)
Diluc/the Ragnvinders are descendants of Vanessa -> the og Ragnvinder could never pull her, sorry but he was kinda a loser, he was obsessed with a different Muraten (who DIED and that's what radicalized him), if he WAS directly descended from AN EXTREMELY PROMINENT HISTORICAL FIGURE LIKE VANESSA IT WOULD BE POINT BLANK MENTIONED, Diluc's bright red hair is a feature his family line has had since the Decaabrian era
Kaeya only pretends to like alcohol as an excuse to see Diluc in the tavern -> 0 reading comprehension here, Kaeya's an alcoholic because he has deep-rooted issues that he struggles to deal with the thoughts of, he's not faking it just to see Diluc, if that was the case Wine wouldn't be his hobby, his interest, one of the first thing he mentions in the serenetea pot, etc.
Kaeya choosing Mondstadt is the objectively "Good" choice and him choosing Khaenri'ah will make him inherently "Evil" -> Stupid
Fuckboy Kaeya -> Most awful mischaracterization of him ever get it AWAY I hate it
Kaeya hiding behind Diluc as a kid and being very jumpy/shy (in the OwOUwU sad boy way, not in the Kaeya Allows Diluc To Take The Lead And Keeps His Distance A Lot Because He Doesn't Want To Make A Mistake way) -> Eugh. Rubs me the wrong way, mischaracterizes him, feels like he's being babied, I hate it
Everyone and their mothers calling Venti's backstory tragic bc he lost his bestie literally 2,600 years ago -> Someone who wasn't trained in battle and didn't have protections in a rebellion against a god?? DIED?? WHO could have seen that one coming. Like sorry you lost your buddy pal Venti but also. IT WAS TWENTY-SIX CENTURIES AGO
Khaenri'ah being a war-bent nation -> Hey guys maybe a nation literally built by people who were persecuted by GODS is going to try and make some defenses against THE GODS. Was it a bad idea for them to make things like Ruin Golems? MAYBE!! Could they also have served more uses than just battle?? YEAH!!!! IT WAS A FUCKIGN UNDERGROUND NATION GUYS MAYBE THE MISSILES AND BULLETS WERE USED FOR??? FUCKING MINES. EXPANDING THE CAVE SYSTEM. I DUNNO GUYS LETS THINK REALLLY HARD FOR A SECOND. "Oh but the fields are tilled by blood" Yeah. Construction work is deadly. Especially who knows how deep underground
Khaenri'ah and the Abyss are the same place -> No
Kaeya's the one who should apologize first -> Literally no
#SORRY. I ACTUALLY HATE THE FANDOM LOL#It's why I don't really tag most of my gensht posts#Bc I just. Get so irrationally mad#turtledove answers#also these are jsut the ones off the top of my head and mainly centered around Kaeya#I get pissed about other character's hcs I just am not thinking of them atm#ALSO HONESTLY. No hate to anyone who likes these!!! I understand that people have different interpretations of the game and characters!!#And not everyone will share my exact interpretation of the characters or even agree with mine!!!!!#HOWEVER!!!!!!!#One time back when the first part of Inazuma was released I made a casual post about Orobaxi and Durin paralels#(ofc this was before we really knew about Enkanomiya at all so everyone assumed that Orobaxi was a Khaenri'ahn dragon)#Someone tried to?? Inform me on why Durin was killed saying that they said so bc they were reading my tags#When. In the tags I mentioned him once or twice and if I remember correctly it was (at least to me) clear in the post that I understood#Durin's circumstance and lore????#Insane pet peeve with the fandom tbh but hey this is the no reading comprehension website I can't rlly get mmad
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there wasn’t a convenient way to put this on my last post, but ryou notably refers to his mom as ママ (“mama”), as opposed to お母さん (“okaa-san”) or 母さん (“kaa-san”) which mahiro and koutarou use respectively when speaking to their mothers. it’s the same as what nagisa uses for nagiko and carries a more familiar/childish connotation.
#mine#you could probably make a case for it being another aspect of the “normal girl with no problems” persona#and it does add to the theme of 'becoming an adult' that we see in his story#i also like to think that (on top of these things) a small part of it stems from ryou caring abt his mom#of course their relationship is complicated. vol. 8 makes it clear they haven't been seeing eye to eye for as long as ryou can remember#we see she can be dismissive of his personal opinions and also constantly pushes heteronormative ideals onto him#(saying “you won’t find a husband acting like that” to an elementary schooler is a lot. and maybe even a bit of projecting on her part)#but also. But also.#i think about him in ch. 33 a lot. not just the way he reacts to the shitty dad visitor but his interactions with the mom too#those panels where she thanks him for calling out her husband on his behavior and we see the look on ryou's face. ugh.#i think he's very aware of the hardships his own mom had to go through b/c his dad failed to take responsibility for either of them#and i think that could feed into the “act like a normal girl” thing too. don't burden her any more that you already have just by existing.#but that's starting to get into speculation/headcanon territory so i'll stop there#(and ofc interpretations where they are more estranged are equally valid. if you want ryou to hit the bricks and leave home#as soon as he graduates all the power to you. my own interpretations are shaped by my own experiences etc etc)#anyways i kind of regret not making an 'extra' category on my last post for the sake of catching bits like these#and the raws are back to being paywalled again and i unfortunately did not think to screencap anything except this#(mainly because it took me by surprise)#so it'll be hard to verify anything... off the top of my head though i believe some other things were that#shizuka goes from calling yo 'matsuzaki-kun' to 'yo-chan'#asahi calls his sister 'nee-san'#and i know i didn't include her on the roster but ren calls ran 'onii-chan'#that's about all i can remember. maybe they'll have another event next year#...i'm not sure if this is relevant to include but i personally am transmasc (albeit not trans binary male) so#ryou's story does hit close to home w/ certain beats. he's not my favorite character but i do like him
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stream of consciousness type deal.
#people's experiences of you will be so drastically different from what you're like when relaxing/unmasking at home and they'll be shocked#when you live together and you thought you let them see what you were like normally except most of the time theyve seen you at home its an#Occassion™ so ofc im gonna be alert and jumping around and talkative bc theres a lot happening and im really happy theyre there#and i can be still. but once they see me day after day exhausted and overstimulated its different bc i am different#i dont feel like i am but i am#and if they dont believe when you explain whats happening then shit hits the fan#for a while i did not understand why they were getting so mad at me at dinner#the other people there understand how i can be foggy or overstimulated and just need to eat and im happy to be there i just need to not look#at anyone or say much and im dizzy from working all day. i need to mash for a bit all ill be good. theyve been generous to take me as honest#when i tell them what im doing.#but a person who is not used to seeing me that way will start thinking im rolling my eyes at whats being said when im actually staring into#space or trying to refocus or trying to get my body to stay in itself instead of drifting off and they think im quietly judging and ik like#im so sorry but fr im not even listening to the group conversation and im not thinking anything negative about you im just gathering my body#i SWEAR. also its agreed that i take part in a group meal instead of isolating with my food bc i need to eat right now too#now that ive stopped working and im going to go back to working after this meal so. this is what i have to do. it is understood and you're#somewhat new to being here on a daily basis but I'm serious i just have to do this and im not being shady im just Something™#(aka exhausted/overstimulated/neurodivergent.) but when i get up with the gathered dishes without making eye contact im automatically angry#and im judgemental and manipulative and trying to control everyone's mood by making my problems everyone's problems with my sighing and eye#rolling. im like. again im not rolling my eyes im trying to focus my eyes. and im not sighing at whats being said im letting out the breath#i realized ive been holding bc im holding myself back from an anxiety rollercoaster drop bc im very overstimulated rn and i was asked to be#here to share meals and deal with it in front of everyone and you arent understanding that id be doing the same thing in private#nothing's WRONG im just OVERSTIMULATED RN and im pulling my body back and im not thinking anything about ANYONE in this room but im starting#to NOW bc you keep assigning meaning where ive told you repeatedly theres none and i get why you're interpreting it this way but i promise#thats not what im doing and your reasons for why im doing it are not accurate.
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As a mini psa, there is very little I consider to be godmodding. Grab my muse, overpower him, move him forward in a scene, etc. If your muse attacks him, just let me say if it lands or how bad the injury is. Let your muse go nuts and don't sweat about the little things! Just let me write Vigor's reactions and we're good 🩷 if you're unsure, feel free to ask! Also, if you do accidentally cross the line, it's fine! I'll let you know and we can change it, it happens so no hard feelings 💖
#ooc.#i keep seeing different personal definitions on what is considered godmodding or not#i cant stress the last part enough! you can ask and if you dont its fine dont worry 😭 things can be changed!!#this is not a reference to anything except seeing different rules and interpretations of godmodding and myself getting a little lost#im an anxious person but also? very chill please dont worry 😭🥺#please also do the same for me btw! im always happy to edit my replies <3#id say no questions asked but i might ask just to better understand ofc#anyway ily its all good please dont be shy !!
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My favorite thing about Matt Reeves' and Robert Pattinson's interpretation of Batman is that you can see just how well this guy would slot into a family.
Nearly every other Batman adaptation in cinemas (barring Lego Batman) could never fit the Batfamily into their stories. They lack the empathy inherent in the core of Batman's persona. The man is obsessive, brooding, self-destructive, and dauntless. He's a broken genius consumed by his singular goal in saving as many lives as he can.
Snyder's Batman? Nolan's Batman? The campy Batmans of the 80's and 90's? None of them have that hidden, integral kindness that grounds Bruce Wayne.
This grimy, emo, grunge, wet, cryptid Battinson? He radiates anger and fear in equal parts. This guy is vengeance.
He's also such a bleeding heart. He never says it and rarely is he called out on it, but you can feel without any ounce of dialogue that this Batman would never kill. Even an indirect kill would horrify this Batman.
Batman treats life, every single life, as sacred. From the paragon of virtue that is Clark, to the most reviled monster masquerading as a man, to the only do what it takes to survive like Selina; this guy sees every life as worthy of a second chance.
Batman's the type of guy to reinstate Harley's doctorate and give her a show to thrive in. He's the type of guy who would defy all common sensibilities to defend a rogue alien like Kara. He's a paranoid wreck, but his faith in others is also endless.
Battinson is the type of guy to take in a grieving, lost, circus orphan and give him a new shot at life and family. He's the type to be impressed by a Gothamite rat who has the guts to steal his wheels and bring him under his wing. To build up a young spirit who has been inspired by his intellect and reputation.
The Batfamily is integral to the Gotham Mythos, and only Battinson (and ofc Lego Batman) have the heart to manage it.
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GENSHIN MEN AND…
prompt: HOW THEY WOULD REACT IF YOU SACRIFICED YOUR LIFE FOR THEM
character(s): diluc, zhongli [part one] childe, ayato [part two, out]
warnings(s): angst ofc—mention of blood, my first post on tumblr so my writing style may be a little icky, inaccuracies since I haven’t looked up genshin lore for a hot minute
note(s): male reader, second person, present tense, not beta read
DILUC
There’s a lot of things you haven’t told him yet. Things you wished you had told him—but everything’s fine, because in this single action you are willing to do for him—your feelings will come inevitably with it and it’s a torrent of emotions that you’re about to burden him with.
He’s been your childhood friend for seventeen years now. All those times you have seen him, smiling, his merry laughter carrying over the breeze, his lips purple from sampling grapes, to the time where that very laughter and smiles disappear to smoothen into a stone face. After the death of his father, Diluc has become reserved, cold, and rather distant. Bitter.
You two were close, once.
You two had a bond that many could not quite interpret— it was as clear as day that you both trusted each other fully, but each always had secrets to hide. Some say proximity is the reason why both of you got close — your manors were near to each other, but truthfully, it was as simple as it was: you two had the same social standing. Both you and Diluc were, for each of their families, supposed to be close for the sake of future alliances and unions, but the friendship soon turned genuine, only for it to crumble under the weight of guilt and grief.
Only for it to crumble on the day Crepus died.
You still remember it vividly; in all its sickening, gruesome, heart wrenching detail. You were fortunate enough not to witness it, but etched in your memory, all you can think of is Diluc’s ravaged expression when he trembled before his father’s corpse.
You were helpless then. You could have extended an arm, you could have done something.
You didn’t.
But now would be different. You know the archons have it in for him when the incident happens the same way it happened with his father: via a carriage incident.
You laugh then at its bitter irony.
Bandits come, a whole load of them, and this time Diluc fights while you are there helpless once again, trembling when you hear the clash of swords and arrows. When you hear his claymore smash against flesh. You don’t have a vision. Diluc has. You don’t have any particular skill in handling a sword; Jean has tried to teach you once, but it has failed. Your brain may be quick and witty, but your steps aren’t.
The bandits have delusions. The archons really are cruel.
You see it before he does. There’s a burst of electric power that he's battling, the elementals clashing with each other—you’re still lagging behind, barely missing the whizzing arrows that skim your flesh, your heart wrenching as you see Diluc’s pained expression. You know what he’s thinking of, and it isn’t you. His memories are reverting back to his father’s death. His birthday. And perhaps that’s why his usual sharpness is wearied down.
You see the sword about to plunge his back before he does.
You scream to tell him.
Your body moves before anything.
Your fingers fumble to clasp the fabric of your clothes, before you tug him out of the way. You feel the weight of a sword against your back; you feel the way it slices through your skin before it presses against your flesh. You taste blood on your tongue, before a myriad of colors burst out; crimson, carmine. All the shades of red. You wobble then, choking out blood, before you stumble. You hear a few slices; razor, swift sharp ones. Then the last of the assailants falls down, and you are made aware that your decision has been the right one.
Diluc has survived.
You stumble. You feel your body hit the ground. Murkiness runs your vision.
“[Name],” you hear a soft, whispering voice carry to your ears. You try your best to cling onto the words. But pain is burning within you—it’s ironic, how they feel more scorching than Diluc’s flames have ever felt. You try your best to swallow down your pants and your pained noises, but it ends up slipping from your mouth in broken, mottled syllables.
Your blurry vision makes out a face.
He cannot be Diluc. He’s crying. And the last time you have seen Duluc cry is when—
Oh.
“Don’t cry,” you say weakly. “Don’t cry, Diluc. I’m sorry I wasn’t of much help.” You try to reach out to his cheek. You regret it a split second afterwards because blood stains his cheeks wet from tears. You end up smearing red all over his face.
“Why?” Diluc says, and it sounds guttural, like the words have been punched out from him. “Why, [Name]?” You hear a flurry of footsteps behind. You assume it’s some surviving witness who has gone to call for backup. But you doubt you’ll survive.
You don’t even know why. To begin with, you aren’t even sure if you are in love with him. The swirling butterflies that flutter about when you see him tells him you are, but society’s expectations push those down. You have been in love with him for as long as you can remember; you have loved him. You have annotated every inch of him down to your memory, every contour, every bit. In your dreams he visits you, smiling sweetly. And you try to remember him when you wake up, trying to pretend that he’s still there, that he’s no longer bitter.
“I don’t know.” Your words come out broken, punctuated by the gurgling of blood from your windpipe.
It’s a half truth. You love him. You don’t know if you do.
“I’m sorry.”
Diluc is sobbing now. It’s uncharacteristic of him. You are brought back to the night when you saw him break down in front of his father’s corpse. And you aren’t yet a corpse: your heart is still beating faintly, your lips are still moving, your body is still trembling. “There’s a lot of things I wanted to tell you, Diluc.”
“Don’t die,” he pleads fervently. His lips graze your forehead, then—and before you know it, he’s embracing you, his tears wetting your shoulder. His begging is childish. Does he not know that the Archons have long abandoned their people? Does he know the sky is empty, and that no amount of pleads can bring a person back to life? You doubt so. “Don’t die, [Name]. I love you.”
He loves you. You smile. He loves you. Words have never felt so sweet befor, and it curbs the bitterness of death upon your tongue. “I love you, [Name]. I love you, so don’t die.”
He loves his father too. But still his father had perished. Similar to you.
“I’m so happy to hear that,” you smile weakly. Your finger starts to fall. “I’m really happy to hear that.”
You don’t have enough time to say those three words back, but it’s fine.
Your actions already did.
ZHONGLI
note(s); reader is an adepti, takes place during archon war
A God has seen their fair share of grieving. So have Adepti. Some come with age—it’s normal for mortal alliances to die before those who are immortal, after all. There is also the Archon War, which has already torn away Zhongli’s beloved companion, Guizhong. And everyday he chokes down the bile in his throat and continues to annihilate and fight. He’s always been built for this, after all, he’s an Archon. He’s a ruthless one at that, known for his brutality and his power. And everyday he looks at you and can only pray again and again to Celestia, that you remain alive.
Guizhong and you have both been his favorites since you two have met. It was Guizhong and you first, before Zhongli met you. Both you and Guizhong were best friends; almost; like sisters and brothers. Guizhong was gentle and sweet, reprimanding at times. You were sweet too, but could be more uncouth. Strong language littered your sentences at times, and Zhongli would see it then; the way Guizhong tugged at you to scold you, or the way you would smile at her. Brother and sister.
Naturally, when Zhongli grew close to Guizhong, he grew close to you. It was funny to see that you hardly knew much about history, though Guizhong clearly loved it. And so it was almost a cycle. Whatever Guizhong taught Zhongli, he taught you. Guizhong had remarked a few times, what an incredible person he was to make even you listen to facts you had earlier called boring.
(“You mellowed a lot, Morax,” Guizhong had told him once. “[Name] mellowed you. You really do care alot for him, don’t you?”
“I suppose.”)
Gods aren’t meant to be mellowed. They are meant to be powerful. Strong enough emotionally so as to not bat an eye when it comes to deaths.
But everything falls apart when Guizhong dies.
He sees you fall to the ground, sobbing and sobbing and crying at the loss of your beloved sister. He sees the way you touch her statue, turned to stone, cradling her face and wishing you were touching soft skin, instead of cold stone. Not sister by blood, but sister in name. He sees the way you break apart after that; Zhongli feels a human sense of emptiness and pain that comes with her death.
It’s all right, he told himself repeatedly. In his grief he has started to flood himself with reassurances. I still have [Name]. I still have [Name]. I still have [Name].
He sees the way you lose yourself in battle after that. Your attacks become sloppy, you become more careless. You become more injured. Zhongli never bothered with your skill. You were talented and strong enough. But now he finds himself protecting you the times you stumble, the times you start to choke out sobs during battle, the times you go wild and bloodthirsty against those you assume have contributed to her death.
Guizhong has said once that he loved you. Zhongli never bothered to think about that. He assumed he would know it himself, when time came. He didn’t need to worry about being in what mortals called a relationship—he would get this war finished with you, become a mortal, and love you freely. It didn’t matter if you didn’t love him. Zhongli could love you at a safe distance. It would all be all right.
He never imagined your declaration of love towards him would come so easily and devastatingly.
Zhongli sees you struck by a burst of elemental power before anything. He sees the way you shoved him inside; he sees the irony. He was so preoccupied with watching you. He hadn’t seen the enemy crawl up to him or nearly kill him. Like how he was watching you, you were watching him. And now his care has killed you.
“[Name].”
There’s an avalanche of emotions. First, he’s furious. He will leach out the killer and will inflict a thousand times more pain on them. Second, he’s heartbroken. He’s terrified of losing you. He can feel your life ebbing away with each passing moment, and he has seen enough wounds to know no healer can save you. He feels your pulse thrumming beneath your skin and he knows you’re dying.
You smile. It looks more like a grimace. “Just survive this goddamn war.”
Zhongli isn’t sure if he will. He feels like he might kill himself, that he might lay his body down next to yours, so that after death your souls would be intermingled, of sorts. It sounds romantic, but there’s absolutely nothing romantic about your death. He does what the Gods are not supposed to do. He feeds into his humanity; he cries.
“Afterwards, just live as a human. I don’t know. Be a dusty collector of antiques. Be a funeral planner or something strange like that. Just live, okay? You look like you want to die.”
You continue to ramble on. Your sentences become connected with each other. Your eyes start to flutter. Your words become faint and faltering.
“I can’t live with you,” he whispers. “First Guizhong, then you��” it’s all his fault. He should have seen it. He should have been more aware. He should—he should…
It’s too late. You’re dead, and he mourns just like a human; sobbing, aching, and dying a little inside.
For a brief moment Zhongli isn’t a God.
hope everyone liked it! it’s my first post so im apprehensive haha be sure to like/reblog & leave a comment if u can
#genshin impact#genshin x reader#male reader#angst#hurt/no comfort#male#zhongli x reader#diluc x reader#genshin impact x reader#genshin impact x you#genshin impact x male#genshin impact scenarios#first post#idk how to tag#Zhongli#Diluc#eroswrites
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@forgettable-au FAN ANIMATION ! LOUD NOISE WARNING!
*What was it all for…?
Song: Vishnu <3 by Peter Cat Recording Co.
…okay.
The main inspiration for this…can be summed up with I LOVE HOW SAD THIS CONCEPT IS. BUT i also adore how WEIRD it is.
This whole thing must be pretty weird and creepy for the characters right??? Like- we dont know for certain what EXACTLY is gonna happen, but we know for a fact that Wingdings finds out hes in a game, then kills himself so he can be closer with god-
THATS PRETTY WEIRD 😭😭 also sad but we can ignore that for now
I also experimented a tad with this in working with silence, so timing things at my own pace! It was really hard! I HAD SO MUCH FUN!!!!!!!
But, time for my FAVORITE PART….ANALYSIS!!!
DISCLAIMER: some things stated as fact haven’t been said in the blog/arent canon to the au itself, just my animation/theories/interpretation, cause i’m silly and headcanoning :3
TITLE:
The proper title ive given this is “To You” which means 2 different and very vague things. What happened to you? and sending a message like “this is To You”.
In that case, “you” is whichever version of Papyrus/Wingdings/Gaster you want- Its not exactly clear which version of him means “you” which is kinda the point. The lines blur together sometimes…
But yeah, Gaster/crazy WD sends messages TOO himself so they���re “To You”
CONTEXT
Wingdings has JUST turned himself into Gaster. Ignore how impossible Sans interacting with him in this moment is, and just hear me out on the angst possibilities-
SCENE 1
As Sans approaches the mess- Gaster is encased in shadow, and looks at him. Expression not telling much- just looking blankly. Doesn’t even look like he’s alive… just… moving. Also the eye thats open, is just a slit. because- perspective. BUT I also had fun putting that there and going hehehehe it looks like WD/Papyrus’ eye
Sans approaches, and getting engulfed in the shadow, leaving the light.
His expression here was REALLY fun and REALLY hard to draw. Angry? maybe. stunned and terrified? DEFINITELY.
In this context (that doesn’t have a lot to go off of with the comics, YET) Sans knows that this was all very much intentional. He absolutely does not want to be angry, and is certainly only feeling it subconsciously.
But… he wanted so badly to understand, and enter his brother world. But now, Sans is just… Baffled. Hes like “what the fuck did you do???”
SCENE 2
Gaster continues to look blank. Looking up at Sans as he approaches, encasing him in even more shadow.
Sans’ hand reaches to Gasters face. From Sans’ perspective, his intentions are like checking for a pulse. Not literally ofc cause pulses arent on our face- but like, feeling for him. For a sign that something is there. (It’s also meant to be something motherly/comforting)
But then, Gaster leans into the touch, somewhat reciprocating this wordless “ive got you” gesture. That’s what makes Sans go from Terrified to just purely grief stricken. His brother is still alive. And he loves him.
But this form wont last for long…For universe fixing screw ups reasons :D 👍
SCENE 3
Gaster then opens his eyes, revealing hes even still got eye lights available for him. Thats what just SHATTERS the dam, and Sans embraces him suddenly.
SCENE(S) 4
Then, the “reset” happens, Gaster is gone, and Papyrus appears in place of Wingdings in his bed.
Nothing is boiling to add to a “frozen in terror” feeling!
Now- drawing all of the differences between the past and present rooms. DESTROYED ME. i HAD SO MUCH FUN BUT I ALSO CRIED 😭 There are no thank-you letters to santa, no racecar bed, no silly bone painting, no action figures, just BORING
I also wanted to keep everything monochromatic, so ofc we’ve got black and white for the void/Gaster, blue for Sans, red for Papyrus, and purple for Sans and Papyrus together.
The tape recorder and lab coat are still greyscale though cause Wingdings still has SOME of his stuff lying around. But the tapes are indecipherable, and Papyrus threw out that lab coat the first chance he got. It gave him the absolute worst feeling, worse than anything he’s ever experienced.
Something I also really enjoy is the fact that the dress shirts were still technically Wingdings’ but they’re red for Papyrus. The lab coat is the only real WINGDINGS thing that Papyrus wants absolutely no part in. Some things that were Wingdings’ are now Papyrus’ cause :D👍
in place of the bone painting are just family photos that I also have extra to say about. Someday I wanna make a comic of what happened to those/what I think would happen to em.
One day Papyrus is like “HEY UH- SANS! THESE PHOTOS! I DON’T LIKE LOOKING AT THEM! CAN WE NOT!?” Aka, he doesn’t remember these things happening/these photos being taken… BUT THEYRE PHOTOS OF HIM.
So he just feels really uncomfortable looking at memories he should reasonably remember, but doesn’t at all- and Sans gets that. But he keeps em in his drawer. Then! they hung up the bone thing in place of it cause SILLY!
But the family photos, I still had fun with. From left to right theyre a photo of Semi with the twins, the twins as baby bones, then as slightly older kids, then WDs graduation photo.
CONCLUSION!
This entire thing was so much fun, and I feel i’ve really grown as an artist over the process of experimenting and not being knocked down by annoying setbacks,
Also, as usual, Works In Progress’ plus extra behind the scenes stuff will be posted shortly after this!! YIPPEEE!!! HAPPY NIGHTMARES!!!!!
OHHHH ALSO EXTRA ART!!!
“AREN’T THEY BEAUTIFUL?”
That silly moment when your clone is really weirdly obsessed with stars and enthusiastically holds your eye sockets open to show you them
#wingdings loves his brother ( biggest plot twist)#dunno if hes even lucid in this#just that its instinct and subconscious emotions guiding him rn-#poor sans dudes 😭#he just wanted the best for his brother#massive L on Gasters part ngl#massive L on Wingdings’ part ngl#MASSIVE W FOR PAPYRUS#CAUSE WHEN HAS HE EVER DONE WRONG??? Dont ansewr that#when i catch you sunsestart when i catch you#wingdings stop please#i am incredibly excited to see the finality of forgettable au undertale wingdings electric boogaloo#wingdings please stop#gaster undertale#gaster wingdings#goopy wingdings#my favorite part of making this was when#uhmmmm#uh#uhhhhhhhhh#forget…#uhhhhhh
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Hey guys welcome to my massive rant about q!Fit and how cc!Fit is incredibly talented and underrated. Since y'all kinda blew up my twitter post LOL.
There are SO many things I could touch on so it's probably gonna be scattered around a lot.
1) Fit had a great character set up from the beginning. From the very start many people knew Fits reputation as a 2b2t veteran, a place with a toxic environment and brutal people. He was no exception, he was closed off to relationships and was very cautious/closed off to many things. Not only that but his past made people distrust him in the beginning. I loved the suspense it brought with his character and the question of why he WAS actually here. Since the whole "vacation" thing was never very convincing. My favourite part was a lot of this was IMPLIED! He built on the character he portrayed in his YT videos and it worked so well, adding small comments about his character here and there (like when he said q!Fits hearing was bad BC of all the explosions he's experienced).
2) His RP skills were another level, not only was he in character almost the WHOLE time when he was live (even donos) when he first did lore he would tease elements of it by writing cryptic messages when others were live. SUCH a good idea when you have a smaller audience and want to create suspense. Not only that, he would have set dates and times for BIG lore stuff, this honestly made it so much easier to keep track of and engage in, not only alone but with friends too! His actual lore was very different from many others, it was cinematic and well planned, yet it still left room for sudden changes. The final result was a cohesive story line that the audience could interpret. I just loved how I could understand what was happening but also have questions/cliffhangers!
3) the fucking MUSIC. Throughout his lore and start of his streams I adored his choice of music, "Stranger in Paradise" being a personal favourite that was not only reoccurring in more than one language but fit SO WELL. I also think it was very clever how a lot of his music choices for his character didn't make sense until you understand the full story e.g. "Can't say goodbye to yesterday". All of this really added a new perspective on his character, almost through cc!Fits own eyes. Along with his music choice just being absolute bops OFC.
4) THE SYMBOLISM. My absolute favourite lore moment of his was at the end of the "Attachments" lore stream. Where the sun is setting over the mountain, slowly covering a patch of roses in darkness. ALL WHILE an instrumental Italian version of "Stanger in paradise" played. Roses of course being a symbol of not only his and Pac's relationship but love in general. His love for Ramon and his friends. The love he had to grow, just like a rose. While the darkness symbolizes his past catching up to him, more specifically his deadline. His time with his family and friends ending, his loves disappearing. Chefs kiss because it makes me cry everytime fr.
5) q!Fit's sexuality (gay). There is something so poetic about a gay guy from an extremely homophobic wasteland learning to come to terms with his own sexuality and love in general. Him slowly building a loving relationship with Ramon, Growing feelings for Pac, Nervously coming out to his son and then finally indulging in the first relationship and FAMILY he had ever had. Finally learning to love and to be loved in return. Even if he is scared about his mission, or taking things too fast. Just learning to live a normal life.
6) Fitmc is criminally underrated and overlooked. I still remember when Fit got his first proper piece of fanart in the museum. It was like... JULY? or something. And I think that says enough. People had no idea he was even doing lore at some points. Averaging at about 1-2k viewers in the beginning, until hideduo came into the mix. A lot but still compared to others very low. I think because his viewers consisted of his YT audience it didn't translate well. But I'm so glad he was able to build a loving community on twitch <3
Anyways it's 3am for me, I probably have more to talk about but this is basically what I meant when I posted that tweet. Feel free to reblog and add your own favourite observations or moments. I wanna hear them! ❤️
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