#this is long but tldr
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abearinthewoods · 4 months ago
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What is autism
I get what autism is and how it can work but only really on a superficial level, I don't get it really cause I don't have it.
Autism is a consistent mismatch between how you mean to come across, and how you actually come across. Autism is knowing and understanding every single cringe thing you've ever done, but only months after the fact. Autism is finding out at 34 that expectations of eye contact doesn't mean stare directly and only into their eyes. Autism is the fact that for every specific struggle an aspie has, there is another who excels at it, which only gets used to excuse why you deserve no compassion for your struggle.
Its the consistent self doubt related to every social interaction because you can't tell where lines are or why/when people are allowed to cross them. Until you just flip flop between holding everybody at arms length so that you don't get in trouble for accidentally-ing a boundary and feeling so isolated watching other people figure out how and when to dip into more familiar/friendly territory with others and deciding to say fuck it to the anxious thoughts and randomly stumbling upon a friend who you can finally connect with on more than a superficial level in the mist of 5 people who are now creeped out by you and are trying to convince said friend to ostracize you.
But on a more literal level, Autism is a brain whos subconscious operates purely on flood gates. Emotional situations will trigger seemingly no emotional reaction, unless the neurochemical strength hits past a threshold, and then it triggers all the emotional reaction. Even the ability to read somebody else, some part of you sees the facial signs, but the signals produce no response, until they hit past a threshold, then they trigger a full and sometimes overwhelming response.
And because we can't read other people, we don't see what people can read into us, correctly or incorrect, which often gets us into trouble.
tl;dr: Imagine if your subconscious could only whisper so quiet you can't hear anything or scream so loud you can't hear anything else.
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madspeed · 6 months ago
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twewy in persona 4... think about it .. .............. (I'm run over by 15 semitrucks)
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appleflavoredkitkats · 5 months ago
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who are you, fundy? (a collection of things i wrote + other people wrote that somewhat answer the question)
sad-ist's the fall / honeydowo's banks of newfoundland / love of the fox by me / @kqluckity's tags on this post / my little champion by me / anonymous' inherited / @goldstarsforall's post / @mellohii's post / okarnell's deleted post / readinglass's there is a quiet passing into silent, desolate pain (and no one is allowed to see) / @desthesleepdeprivedwriter's late night shift / neg_nancy's be my home / rabbitsntheclouds' pandora's box / my post / my post
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a-fangirltrash · 5 months ago
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I ship Billford in a "needy triangle can't get over the first man that made he feel things after saying that he was just a toy for him" way. And FiddAuthor In a "romance protagonist ends up with the good guy after 3 seasons with the ugly ass bad boy" way
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This not only gives a bit of detail into what goes into roles like honor guards and cemetery officials...
It also highlights exactly how vile it was when Trump's campaign characterized the official who objected to their videoing as (and I directly quote) "clearly suffering from a mental health episode".
Like... I'm not exactly shocked or surprised... but still... the fuck.
Also, this may be harsh, but the Gold Stars and vets who took part in this were complicit. It was absolutely fair for them to take part in te RNC, even if I may disagree. It was a whole other thing to smile next Trump as he thumbs-up his way into turning Arlington into a circus. ESPECIALLY since other families have been caught up in this:
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sayruq · 1 year ago
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On Palestine and Hamas
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Related thread
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kotonni · 2 months ago
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Ok this might be a stretch but after act 2 I was so curious to see why Jayce had looked upon Viktor like that
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It wasn't fear, not exactly, upon seeing Viktor in a divine sort of position I could only describe Jayce's gaze as awed.
Of course, before the third act came out, the popular theory of "Jayce is stuck in a time loop and has killed Viktor many times before" explained a lot about his behavior but not about this look. Why would he look so shaken if this isn't his first time seeing him?
Now that the show is over I do believe we might have an answer and of course the answer is given to us in this scene.
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When Cait mentions Viktor, forcing Jayce to confront that more than Ambessa, the greatest threat to their lives and Piltover is Viktor himself, Jayce thinks back to that first meeting after the time skip.
Of course we know at this point that there was no time loop. This is indeed the first time Jayce sees Viktor as the herald, and Viktor's reaction to seeing Jayce for the first time after months has been distorted in Jayce's own memories.
In his mind Viktor smiles at him. Although he is about to kill him, from Jayce's perspective, Viktor's first look at him after months of being separated is one of pure affection.
During his time in the arcane he was forced to undergo contidions that directly reflect Viktor's own upbringing, but let's not forget he was also haunted by such visions:
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Making Mel's image dissappear only to be replaced by Viktor's is extremely symbolic, this is not Jayce obsessing over Viktor and his actions, instead we are directly told that not only is Jayce's relationship with Viktor of the same sort as his relationship with Mel, Viktor is quite literally replacing his former lover.
We could talk about the constant parallels between Mel and Viktor for days, but I believe my last point is backed up even further by propably the most evident mirror shot of the two of them:
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appearing again during Viktor's conversation with Jayce:
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This is very clearly a POV shot of Viktor from Jayce's own eyes, although it is Viktor talking, the images we see are from Jayce remembering their first meeting which, of course, was fated to happen.
With this established and going back to my main point, I believe upon seeing Viktor for the first time in months, who is gazing down at him with a smile on his face, and after being forced to confront his feelings for Viktor, Jayce looks up at him with love.
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This is his own realization that they are in fact meant to find one another in every timeline.
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violent138 · 4 months ago
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Batfamily member's civilian identity becomes some serial killer's target because it fits some profile. Cue said murderer going after this member of the Batfamily, earning a very shocked and mildly exasperated set of swear words and then getting their ass kicked. The Batfamily member doesn't even bother calling the cops, just tosses the would be killer in the back of their car (which has bloody gloves in the seat and weird files on people), leading the murderer to conclude they're in the presence of a much worse serial killer.
Tldr: Outsider POV fic where a Batfamily member earns the undying adoration of an actual murderer and it's a slow, convoluted process to getting the evidence to arrest them while also protecting their secret identity.
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yourlazykitkat · 2 months ago
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Joel's celestial symbol being a car isn't complete crack and actually might be a good idea.
In Fast and Furious franchise, one of movies' climax have the characters strap jetpacks to a car which is strapped to a military aircraft in which two characters drive off and are sent into orbit. Yes this is thing that happens and yes, it somehow does perfectly capture the narrative of joel's victory and what it brings to the celestial symbolism.
I have never watched the fast and furious movies, all i know about this franchise is this scene and that it's about family and that's all you really need to know. But still, i shall yap.
The Fast and Furious movies are a perfect intertextual lens to view the Wild Life season and Joel's victory. The franchise has two highlights to it: the fucking spectacle and the interpersonal relationships. Did I enjoy the mechanics of wild life? Not particularly but I enjoyed the spectacle; the rush of I don't know what the fuck is going on but I'm here for the ride. Did I enjoy the storylines? There won't many clear and strong storylines this season as much as there were ever-resonating character beats that I ate up like it was the last supper. (JUST LIKE IN FAST AND FURIOUS)
Pearl and Scott reluctant allies and healing, BigB and Cleo healing, Etho's slut arc, Bamboozlers overcoming their character's persistent struggle with loneliness together, whatever the fuck treebark is doing, pearl picking her champion in impulse, grian losing his two wings. DESERT DUO DIVORCE ARC IS OVER? OMG DESERT DUO DIVORCE ARC IS BACK ON. Bad boys finally kill scott, shinyduo situtionship (going insane over them- i can't wait for more of them), tango and bdubz as angry wives and of course: The family.
Gem and Joel's alliance was the most stable alliance in the season. We made jokes about the 4Gs as they became the 5,6-7 Gs. They never knew who they truly could trust. Mumbo and skizz' paranoia might of been a joke but grian's curse did wipe them out in the end, martynn has forever ruined any trust in future alliances after limited life (especially given how he planned to betray ren in third life...) so i did not have any faith in treebark lasting. I don't need to explain tuff boys, etho was cheating on them to their faces and bamboozlers came close but any bamboozler fan will tell you how anxious they were that something would ruin a group. Look at Timmy on the high that he could finally win and break the curse, always running off carelessly. Scar, who was so desperate to win grian's favour that he was spilt between him and bamboozlers. Lizzie, who wanted to do anything but die alone but multiple times in the series, could not find her boys.
But gem and joel were always there for each other, their trust and love in the each other displayed for the whole server to see in the centre of the map (the most dangerous part). Not only did it help each other, they solidified so many other alliances that were shaky for so long (adopting grian when he's alone coz no one deserves to be alone, giving the Gs a common enemy to unite against, "we are bamily"). This perfectly encapsulates the fast and furious thematic core, we have no idea what' going on but we'll make our last stand together.
Very long-winded post, might come back later to fix it (i haven't had the chance to explore joel specifically and what this victory means for him) but even though it ruins the celestial aesthetic, the car for joel is so perfect. If u need it all celestial, the shooting star works pretty well in adjacent but it's so perfect for the wildest, most scuffed season to ruin the aesthetic of the life series BUT STILL BE THEMATICALLY COHERENT.
I have my complaints for this season and it did take me a while to decide how i wanted to approach the narrative of this season. Genuinely the more i think about it, the more i love the season.
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francesderwent · 2 days ago
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thinking about snarky cultural/theological commentary and. the thing about snark is this: it’s easy, and it’s instant gratification. it’s easy because you’re playing to a likeminded audience. you get the way they think, you know the sort of things they find ridiculous, and so you know what’s going to play well with them. it’s not that hard to come up with a zinger that’s going to earn you applause from your own side. it’s also pretty easy to make another human being who’s not on your side look stupid, because we’re stupid creatures and we all have plenty of exploitable weak spots. it’s preaching to the choir, and it’s preaching meanly to the choir. and then, your snark bears all its fruit right away. you get the glowing feeling of having scored points against the enemy while being patted on the back by your friends for being so brave. if you succeeded in being snarky, you get the rewards of snark that very instant.
on the other hand, seeking to share the truth you possess in a mode in which it could actually be received—that is, says St Thomas, according to the mode of the recipient—that’s hard, and it’s so far from being instantly gratifying that you may never see the fruits of it in this life. not only are you not thinking about your likeminded audience, you’re not even going to trot out the truth simply in the way you understand it and call it your best effort. rather, you have to try to get inside your interlocutor’s frame of mind and understand how the truth you know is going to fulfill their own priorities and longings. you have to understand them so well that you see the truth of their position, even if that truth is buried very very deep, and then see how that truth connects them to the truth you see. you have to be insightful, and compassionate, and so, so patient. you don’t get to score any points, with anybody. your interlocutor might still get annoyed with you and turn around and make you look stupid. but you can’t just say “I’m going to speak the truth and I don’t care who hears and how they take it”—you have to care how they take it, because the truth is relational, it’s given and received, not just spouted into a void. and frankly you have to care how they take it because you have to care about their salvation.
don’t get me wrong, there are times in every person’s life when they will be called to stand up and be counted, to put fumbling words to what they hold most dear even if they can’t make everyone understand. but I don’t know that it’s a virtue to be always focused on being seen saying the truth, with no consideration given to who hears you and what they’ll hear in it—and it’s certainly not a virtue to be always focused on being seen saying the truth in a mean and funny way. “instruct the ignorant” is a spiritual work of mercy. but instruct the ignorant does not mean “instruct the ignorant while making the knowledgeable laugh and/or high five.”
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felassan · 5 months ago
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sunsetsover · 4 days ago
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there's something about that scene in the pool. bc like. bison and kant are recreating the car scene from titanic. and kant is supposed to be jack and bison is supposed to be rose. and bison takes kant's hand and kisses all his fingers like rose does jack. but the thing is that bison isn't laying in kant's arms like rose is laying in jack's. it's kant that's laying in bison's arms. kant who is held and kissed like rose is. kant who's hand slams against the window - and it's pretend and it's a question but still. he's still asking aren't you gonna do that to me too? and bison is like sure, once i have you in a real car. and it's like. when did kant become rose? when did bison become jack? at what point did things change?
obviously kant lying on bison's chest is supposed to be a neat parallel to the swing scene. but i think it's more than that. and i admit i am famous for reading too much into things, but i think it's probably kind of lowkey a commentary on their relationship too. bc like... kant and bison have never fit into a neat little box when it comes to their relationship OR their sexual dynamic. even sitting here i'm having a hard time articulating it properly bc it's like... it's own little thing. you just have to see it and let it talk for itself. and i think some people have a hard time w that, either bc they don't like unorthodox relationship dynamics (boring!) or they're so locked into what a relationship between 2 men is 'supposed' to be like (and this goes doubly so where kantbison r concerned imo bc of the age and the size difference) that they can't understand what they're seeing in front of them. bison lays in kant's arms and it's 'see! how can bison be a dom! he just thinks that's what he wants bc of the trauma of his upbringing but he's clearly the baby!'. which is just like... crazy to me.
bc can you not feel it? can you not feel that kant is literally completely at bison's mercy? how, while clearly bison isn't super interested in maintaining a dom/sub dynamic outside of sexual situations, there's always an undercurrent of it anyway now? of kant being completely tuned into bison's frequency? bc yes, it's true that kant does baby bison physically with all his kisses and affection and the way he tucks him under his arm and helps him flip fish and hold the hammer at the arcade bc it's too heavy. but it's also true that he kind of behaves like a kid around bison sometimes. he whines and he brags and he pouts and he makes silly jokes. it's always kinda been there, but over the past few episodes you can really see it in their little moments together. how he acts immature. how he rambles. how he seeks bison out. bc it's safe now! bc he trusts bison to look after him! he knows now he can be silly and brattish bc that's how bison likes him! he doesn't have to be cool or suave anymore. he can put it all down and let himself be looked after for once.
and don't get me wrong, it's subtle! and it's not constant! their personalities are still undoubtedly there - kant still still looks after bison, and bison also still pouts and whines and acts childish in his own way. but it's different now. there has just been this very subtle shift that's probably come as a result of the truth being out and all being forgiven and also probably bison proving that if kant safewords, he really will stop - even in the most extreme of situations. and i think the scene in the pool really epitomizes that shift for me.
bc they're comfortable like that now. all that apprehension they both used to have in the early eps is completely gone. and so kant plays jack and bison plays rose, but when bison pulls kant through that metaphorical window, the dynamic changes. what was just a background hum starts to buzz louder between them. bison kisses his fingers like rose does, but instead of being held, he's the one holding, and that's on purpose. they both know it. so kant lets himself be held now. lets himself be doted on and kissed stupid. and it clearly affects him quite a lot bc you see him swallow heavily twice and his eyes keep slipping closed and for a few seconds you see him go all hazy eyed and distant. and when bison assures him he WILL fuck him once he gets him in a real car he hits him with the 'you promise 🥺️'. like how am i not supposed to say sub idk.
anyway. this was rambly and idk if it made any sense to anyone but me but i just think the way kantbison's relationship dynamic is not being clean cut or easy to pinpoint while it's also still always clear as fucking day exactly what is going on is so neat. and also kant is undeniably bison's big baby <3
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blueskittlesart · 5 months ago
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*sigh* thoughts on Nintendo's botw/totk timeline shenanigans and tomfoolery?
tbh. my maybe-unpopular opinion is that the timeline is only important when a game's place on the timeline seriously informs the way their narrative progresses. the problem is that before botw we almost NEVER got games where it didn't matter. it matters for skyward sword because it's the beginning, and it matters for tp/ww/alttp (and their respective sequels) because the choices the hero of time makes explicitly inform the narrative of those games in one way or another. it matters which timeline we're in for those games because these cycles we're seeing are close enough to oot's cycle that they're still feeling the effects of his choices. botw, however, takes place at minimum 10 thousand years after oot, so its place on the timeline actually functionally means nothing. botw is completely divorced from the hero of time & his story, so what he does is a nonissue in the context of botw link and zelda's story. thus, which timeline botw happens in is a nonissue. honestly I kind of liked the idea that it happened in all of them. i think there's a cool idea of inevitability that can be played with there. but the point is that the timeline exists to enhance and fill in the lore of games that need it, and botw/totk don't really need it because the devs finally realized they could make a game without the hero of time in it.
#i really do have a love-hate relationship with this timeline#because it's FASCINATING lore. genuinely. and i think it carries over the themes of certain games REALLY well#but i also think it's indicative of a trend in loz's writing that has REALLY annoyed me for a long time#which is this intense need to cling to oot#and on a certain level i get it. that was your most successful game probably ever. and it was an AMAZING game.#and i think there's definitely some corporate profit maximization tied up in this too--oot was an insane commercial success therefore you'r#not allowed to make new games we need you to just remake oot forever and ever#and that really annoys me because it makes certain games feel disjointed at best and barely-coherent at worst.#i think the best zelda games on the market are the ones where the devs were allowed to really push what they were working with#oot. majora. botw. hell i'd even put minish cap in there#these are games that don't quite follow what was the standard zelda gameplay at their time of release. they were experimental in some way#whether that be with graphics or puzzle mechanics or open-world or the gameplay premise in its entirety. there's something NEW there#and because the devs of those games were given that level of freedom the gameplay really enforces the narrative. everything feels complete#and designed to work together. as opposed to gameplay that feels disjointed or fights against story beats. you know??#so I think that the willingness to allow botw and totk to exist independently from the timeline is good at the very least from a developmen#standpoint because it implies a willingness to. stop making shitty oot remakes and let developers do something interesting.#and yes i do very much fear that the next 20 years of zelda will be shitty BOTW remakes now#in which botw link appears and undergoes the most insane character assassination youve ever seen in your life#but im trying to be optimistic here. if botw/totk can exist outside the timeline then we may no longer be stuck in the remake death loop#and i'm taking eow as a good sign (so far) that we're out of the death loop!! because that game looks NOTHING like botw or oot.#fingers crossed!!#anyway sorry for the game dev rant but tldr timeline good except when it's bad#asks#zelda analysis
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tea-cat-arts · 7 months ago
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I simply think this fandom doesn't give Wei Wuxian enough credit for the various ways in which he saved Lan Wangji
#mdzs#mo dao zu shi#wangxian#idk man- i just see a lot of “Lan Wangji has always been protecting Wei Wuxian” posts and its like...#I mean... Lan Wangji has always certainly been trying to protect Wei Wuxian#it took him a long time to figure how to successfully do that though#rereading the books rn and noticing theres a lot of instances that could be read as lwj being frustrated over his inability to protect wwx#like he seemed ready to cry when wwx went missing for a while and then came back with the cursed leg#lwj has always been great at protecting wwx from physical threats (ex: waterborn abyss) but had no idea how to protect him from himself#meanwhile wwx has always been instictually good at saving lwj from both#like I'm 100% lwj would've become like Jiang Cheng if wwx hadn't snapped him out of the blindly following authority thing#and also like... 15 y/o lwj wasnt happy with his life. he was lonely and stressed and literally signing up to be flogged whenever he goofed#wwx is who allowed lwj to grow up by showing him what it was like to actually be a kid (shown in story whenever lwj gets drunk)#he led lwj to having a more flexible mindset. and it both let lwj relax and set lwj up to be a better parent#looking into lwj's dynamic with the juniors- he lets them break a fuck ton of the petty rules and encourages them to question authority#he also teaches them to not be married to any one meathod of problem solving#wwx is also able to save lwj from his own stubbornness#ex: carrying lwj when he broke his leg. getting lwj to cough up bad blood. getting lwj to keep the rabbits#wwx also tends to give lwj the words he has trouble saying himself. helps him communicate#wwx also protects lwj in fights a lot but thats narratively less important#except the various times wwx puts himself in danger to help lwj. those times are what made it so lwj could never move on from wwx#like with the cave incident#or when wwx helped surpress the arm instead of using the chaos to escape cloud recesses#tldr i guess: i think this fandom tends to treat lwj being the best like its natural to him when really wwx accidentaly rewired his brain#I'm looking directly at fanfic writers who act like the Lans would've treated wwx better than the Jiangs#lwj had to do so much work and self reflection post meeting wwx to be the way he is. he is not the sole product of the Lan teachings
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steorrneleom · 12 days ago
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BG3 Elven Names: A Watsonian Perspective
Amongst folks who like Astarion as a character, the meaning of his name is a common topic of discussion. The answer is typically that it is a variation of Astērion (Ἀστερίων), a Greek name meaning starry, which makes complete sense considering that he is likely a moon elf, but it is based in a language that does not actually exist in the Forgotten Realms. This isn’t a problem, a Doylist answer is completely valid, but I thought it would be fun to figure out what the meaning would be in Elvish (the D&D version), a Watsonian answer (1). After Astarion's, I set out to see if this could be done with Halsin and Cazador as well. I present here my results, with narrative. I have also included a TLDR at the end for those who want to skip the methodology.
(1) To any who may not be aware: Doylist means that it is what the author was thinking when writing / what their intention was. Watsonian means the in-universe perception / explanation. Example: Why did magic change so much between D&D 3.5e and D&D 4e? Doylist answer is that they wanted to simplify how magic worked to draw in new players. Watsonian answer is that Mystra was assassinated by Shar and Cyric resulting in arcane magic becoming unstable and changing its behavior.
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In the Lack of Duolingo
First things first, I needed a resource for the Elven language in D&D. As with many collaborative canons, official uses of the language were spread through many mediums and over the course of decades. This makes hunting down sources difficult, but luckily a wonderful person by the name of Diane Morrison was kind enough to create ‘A Treatise on Espruar,’ which offers a complete dictionary. This is what I will be using:
A quick disclaimer that, also like with many collaborative canons, this language has inconsistencies and gaps which makes a true cannon language impossible until a complete conlang is officially released. What I present is to the best of our current resources.
Method to the Madness
I have the words, but next comes the challenge of using them. These names were not made to be interpreted in the lens I am using, so it is kind of like trying to fit a square peg in anything but a square hole. Some words can line up near perfect but have meanings that make absolutely no sense, like dragon royal world, or some words can have the right meanings but have the wrong letters. I resolved this with the following criteria:
The words used must be as close to the name as possible.
Sound shifts must be minimal and not drastic.
As few letter drops as possible.
A meaning that makes sense in context (as much as possible).
Key
Word / part of word Meaning
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Astarion
Something noteworthy about Astarion’s name that I kept in mind when translating it is that it was his ‘child name’, the name that was given to him by his parents and not one he chose for himself (2). This means that the meaning wouldn’t necessarily be one that he himself liked, but rather one that a parent would like to ascribe to their child.
Searching for words, one almost seemed perfect at first: Aasterinian (meaning quicksilver). It was already so close to his name without having to Frankenstein words together, but sadly it broke nearly all of my rules. It had three letter drops and two sound shifts: er to ar and ian to ion. I also was of the opinion that while quicksilver was a fine name meaning, it wasn’t one that felt like it was meant for a child.
So, the next option was a combination of Aestar (meaning together or one heart) and -ion (meaning noble). I was hesitant of this one at first. The meaning I wanted to use for Aestar, heart, had seemed to be reserved for the context of marriage at first glance, but then I saw the name Araestar with its meaning of Goldheart. This is evidence that heart is valid for names as well.
Thus, my Watsonian idea is that Astarion’s name comes from Aestarion, which translates to noble heart. This only has one letter drop and a slight sound shift from Ae to A. I also personally think noble heart is a fitting meaning for a child’s name.
(2) Astarion’s tombstone has his name and states he was 39 when he ‘died’. Elves are typically considered adults and choose their new name when they reach the age of 100.
Halsin
Halsin was a bit of a hard one, where there were tons of possibilities but near all of them just didn’t fit right. Halsin is 350 years old, he would have presumably chosen his name with a meaning that represented him as a person. He, in my opinion, wouldn’t have a name that meant something random like weak brook or red. In addition, I had to find a combination of words that fit my rules.
So, I had to write down three prefix possibilities, five word possibilities, three suffix possibilities, and mix and match until I got something that met my criteria. I won't include my rejected combinations due to their number, but here are some reasons I rejected them: ‘r to l sound shift is too drastic’, ‘the on sound is too different from in’, and ‘though m and n are close in the IPA the sound shift feels too great’. Luckily, I did find a combination I was satisfied with in the end.
My Watsonian idea is that Halsin’s name comes from Halasan which translates to one who is free and wild. The ending of Halasan would likely be pronounced like in already so it would only be a letter change instead of a sound shift. The only other change needed would be a letter drop, the a in las.
Cazador
Now this name I went in thinking that it would be the true challenge, the 'z' felt distinctly non-elven to me, but much to my surprise D&D elven does have the z sound and letter. It was still hard to get a good meaning out of it, especially since it is unknown whether this would be his child name or his adult name and there was only one combination of words that worked.
The collection of words at my disposal were cas which means herald, -adar which means world, and za which means royal, of royalty. From this, I got Cazadar, which is a modification of Casadar that adds za. This would give a direct translation of herald of royalty world, which I feel would be interpreted as royal herald (to the world). It isn’t the cleanest meaning, but I feel like there is ego and world domination vibes to it, so it works.
A slight tangent, it is debatable how valid my overlapping construction is. It is possible that the shift from cas to caz would be seen as just a letter shift and not an addition of the word za. This wouldn’t be a problem, herald of the world is still a valid meaning for my purposes, despite it losing some of the ego. There is also the possibility that the za is seen but it results in the caz being interpreted as ca, a letter shift from ka which means dragon. Since there is no dor or dar in elvish, it is possible that it would be seen either as an ornamentation or a shortening of -adar, in which case the translation becomes dragon of royalty or dragon of royalty world. These meanings aren’t horrible in the case of a wrongful interpretation, but it doesn’t entirely make sense, and Kazaadar breaks the rules I imposed.
With all this being said, my Watsonian idea is that Cazador’s name comes from Cazadar, which can be translated to royal herald (to the world). This is the one name that I created that feels like a stretch, but I tried my best.
Last Names
I originally only did the first names when I decided to make this, but then I realized while typing all this that this probably wouldn’t be complete without trying the last names too... and so, I decided to give them a try. I sat down with the elven dictionary and felt the hope leave my body as soon as I wrote them down on my scrap paper. Ancunín, with a little accent on the ‘i’ and a super rare letter for D&D elvish, ‘u’; and Szarr, with two consonants (S and Z of all things) next to each other. I predicted a struggle, a struggle is what I got, and I fled the battle, unsuccessful. I was not able to find anything that met my rules… yet.
I will revisit this someday, but it will require a lot more research on Faerûn than I am able to put in right now, sadly. Here is the fun thing about last names, they are often more influenced by location as opposed to the ethnic origin of someone. Case and point: in the US a lot of folks changed their last name upon arrival to better fit in, or it was messed up enough times that they changed it for convenience sakes. Examples: Müller turning into Miller (a spelling change), Zimmermann becoming Carpenter (a direct translation), or going from Sadowski to Smith (A complete change to assimilate). They also have a different meaning convention compared to regular names to begin with, where they can be based on the location an ancestor lived, their occupation, or their nickname.
A Watsonian answer may exist for Ancunín and Szarr, but it would be rooted in where their families lived through the eras and other local languages that might have influenced the original elvish version. Like perhaps the location the Ancunín family is from has a predominant language which favors ‘u’ as a vowel. Maybe Szarr isn’t elvish at all and is an occupation name. I don’t know if I will be able to find a satisfying answer, but if I do one day I will be sure to post it.
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Bonus
Espruar is the alphabet of the elvish language, which looks really cool in my opinion. Before I even started looking into the Watsonian origins of the names, I thought it would be cool to see what their names looked like written in it and so vectorized all the letters. Below are the character's names and their origin names written with Espruar.
Astarion
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Aestarion
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Halsin
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Halasan
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Cazador
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Casadar
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Cazadar
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Little End Note
I want to thank everyone who read through my long explanations and tangents, I hope you enjoyed reading the thought process behind all of these ☺️. I also wanted to let you folks know that I am going to make another post soon with my vectorized Espruar alphabet so anyone can write with it should they want to.
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TLDR
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lazy-sixteen · 3 months ago
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Daniil why would you say that???
Watching Pathologic (classic HD) while on break from suffering in Pathologic 2, and it really struck me how different the first meeting with the Bachelor was in each game.
Pathologic 1, well, only a screenshot can do it justice,
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(Yes . . . far be it from me to call myself a person of mystical inclinations. However, when I look at you, I get the feeling that nature is playing jokes on us. It is as if both the left and right hand have clutched the head to realize for the first time they are two parts of a single whole.
>Why?
>I get that feeling too. Does that mean that we are alike?)
That's like the first thing he says to the Haruspex, and while yeah everybody in Pathologic talks like that to a degree, even in game, in character that's a wild thing for Dankovsky specifically to say.
We just spent an entire playthrough as this guy mocking and/or having breakdowns over the existence of the supernatural - especially precognition. And in strolls this 6'2 resting murder-face dude with half-a-medical degree, widely thought to be a serial killer (kinda true), and Dankovsky's like,
"BTW, my heart is telling me we're kinda two halves of the same whole.😊❤️"
Absolutely hilarious. Even funnier is that the Haruspex, grumpy at baseline and currently having the worst day of his life (so far), can agree with him. Great first impression all around!
Then over in Pathologic 2, the Bachelor is high-key fumbling, like fumbling so hard you can get an achievement for it.
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Carpetbagger - Remind a colleague of the Hippocratic Oath -- and fail
Not to meme on the guy (who is of course, multi-faceted and at his core deeply altruistic even if he often seems to have trouble expressing that on an individual basis), but initial Pathologic 2 Bachelorencounter is Daniel at his most prickly prick.
He gets Artemy's name wrong (possibly on purpose and definitely twice),
condescendingly demands the Haruspex be his errand boy,
basically calls himself the smartest person in a room of 2,
and can accidentally imply that he left a couple of orphan children to die because he doesn't treat mutts (he actually refused to treat the orphans' dogs).
Yikes - no wonder Artmey spends the first couple of Days taking cheap shots at the guy.
I mean in both Haruspex routes eventually he ends up very friendly with the Bachelor, which makes senses on a thematic level given the some of the Haruspex's major themes/ideals are connection and community. You could say their first meeting was changed to be funnier ("Vorakh") or more in character for the expected tension between two people under a lot of stress who can both be difficult to get along with at baseline
However, what about if we look at it from a meta-narrative level?
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While you can play Pathologic 1 as either the Bachelor or the Haruspex on your initial run, it's pretty common knowledge who you are supposed to play first.
"Daniil Danokovsky's Fun Steppe Vacation was just the tutorial for Artemy Burakh's Tormentous Nightmare" - HBomberguy in Pathologic is Genius and Here's Why
This means that the player in Pathologic 1 has already been introduced to Daniil - even if Artmey hasn't - and the game reflects that! You the player know the Bachelor, you've been him, and you probably got really attached after keeping him alive for 12 horrible, horrible days.
Even though you know he can be a bit sanctimonious and dismissive, the player knows he's rational and compassionate and thus already used the evidence at hand to figure out Artemy hasn't killed anybody!
Of course one of the first things you (the player) would want to do as the new protagonist is check on your former avatar, and the game rewards you for it! Talking with the Bachelor on Day 1 as Artemy can raise your reputation - which is super critical. It might be the increase that keeps you from getting hunted in the streets or starving as shops refuse to sell food. What a great first (Second?) impression!!
Daniil's unprompted "hey are we soulmates or is it just me?" line is funny, but meta-narratively it is also true. They are the player's first two avatars, taking turns being puppeted by the same you as protagonists through the same overall story to two opposing conclusions. They are (your) right and left hand. You've played Dankovsky, (you) know this and having previously been the protagonist this new Dankovsky seems to subliminally know this too.
Meanwhile over in Pathologic 2, the only route is the Haruspex - disregarding the Marble Nest (worst day of Dankovsky's life [so far, ad infintuum]) which has enough time fuckery going on that I shall disregard it for this analysis - you can only be Artemy Burakh.
Either under the assumption that the player of Pathologic 2 hasn't played Pathologic 1 or that they've played all of Pathologic 1 including Changeling' Route's extended murder hide and seek between Dankovsky and Burakh, We (the player and Artemy) don't know Daniil when we meet him in Pathologic 2 as anything but the broken man we saw in the depressing into.
Is he our friend this time? Is he our enemy? Whatever he is, he's certainly a sanctimonious prick.
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(Today's tragedy won't be the last. I was blessed with a naturally high intelligence, and my observations indicate that a very deadly visitor has come to this god-forsaken town. That's all I can say for now.
>...I don't like you, Bachelor Whatever.)
In Pathologic 2, both the player and Artmey meet Daniil Dankovsky at at his worst, and slowly work-up from there because both of us are meeting, getting to know, and building a relationship with him for the first time.
This is actually parallel to how you first meet the Haruspex in Pathologic 1 as the Bachelor!
If you are playing in the intended order, both the player and Daniil don't know anything about Artmey besides the serial killer rumors, and likewise you meet him at his worst - (in prison and later he murders a young woman to get Daniil the infected heart he needs to try and develop a vaccine). Much like we see the worst of Daniil's classism, arrogance, and inability to connect beyond quid pro quo (hehe, latin) in our Patho2 intro; in Patho1 we initially only see Artemy's standoffishness, brutality, and stubbornness.
Interestingly, following Daniil's themes/ideals of transcendence and rationality we (the player and Daniil) don't actually end up connecting much with Artmey on the Bachelor's route. The player is influenced by the puppet, and why would Dr. Daniil Dankovsky - whose route is plagued by betrayal, manipulation, and the difficulty of connecting to even people who do selflessly care for him (like Eva) - make friends with a violent, possibly dangerous guy who practices a sort of medicine Dankovsky doesn't believe in?
(I couldn't find a good screenshot for this, but mentally insert a picture of Artemy doing a roadside dissection)
Basically if Daniil is the player's protagonist he won't reach out, because in-character why would he?
If Artemy is the player's protagonist, Daniil will try to be friends in Patho1 (because of the player's previous actions affecting both avatars) or in Patho2 Artmey will eventually connect with him because that's in-character for him.
Overall, I suppose this means that Danii's instant and uncharacteristic buddy-buddy attitude with Artemy on the Haruspex route Patho1 is completely justified from a meta-textually narrative, as is his horrific fumbling in Patho2.
And it is also very, very funny.
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