#this is evidence for why trans mascs have it worse

[amirmeavid]

what you don’t seem to understand is that statistics and surveys are JUST as subjective as things like theory. you seem to put things like surveys in a “practical, unbiased truth” category and things like memoirs or theory discussions about people’s actual real-life lived experience in a “impractical, biased falsehoods” category. but that’s YOUR personal judgement, not a universal opinion, and you can’t treat it like it is. statistics and surveys can be just as hypothetical and flawed as “personal experience”. in fact, most of the surveys you pull statistics from were questions answered by individuals about their personal experiences. so like, stop trying to push this arbitrary divide between “theory” and “evidence”.

'what you don’t seem to understand is that statistics and surveys are JUST as subjective as things like theory.'

Dude, Fite-Club I know this is you. You're the only person who will ever make a claim that statistics are AS SUBJECTIVE as something that is PURELY subjective.

I'm not saying statistics are perfect. But trying to argue that RECORDED TRENDS OF LARGE NUMBERS OF PEOPLE are not less subjective than SINGULAR PEOPLE's experiences is only a claim you could make.

'most of the surveys you pull statistics from were questions answered by individuals about their personal experiences.'- Its almost like theres a difference between 'trends' and 'singular individuals'.

'stop trying to push this arbitrary divide between “theory” and “evidence”.' ...Ah yes. The notoriously 'arbitrary' divide between 2 factually different things.

Theory- An educated guess presented as an explanation for observable patterns

Evidence- Observable patterns.

If your theory does not align with observable patterns, it is WRONG.

[writingforfishes]

Otto and Atticus Part 9: Atticus' Birthday

I had intended to write this around my own birthday, but that idea got drowned out by an unfortunate Real Life Event. As a result, I ended up writing the previous roleplay story as it seemed less demanding mentally.

I plan to write two other stories following this taking place on the same day.

This one in particular is very saucy. It's probably the smuttiest I've ever written on here. As such, play close attention to the CW list for things that might not be what you want to read. I have, once again, attempted to separate sections so that the smuttiest bits can be avoided, but an arousal theme does run through most of the story and so might occur outside of the smutty heading.

CW

Very very fast and consistently fast hiccups.

Hiccups induced and made worse intentionally.

Mentions of arousal.

Nudity.

Mentions of genitalia in various detail.

Mentions of trans masc (or trans societal male traits presenting) anatomy post-top surgery and post HRT

Scar musing by character.

Scar touching by character.

Mention of an uncircumcised genitalia.

Fingering.

Masturbation.

Mentions of past alcohol abuse (inferred).

Lobbing someone in the head with a pasta noodle.

The consequences of not looking where you're hiccuping.

This is a story that includes trans-focused contemplation from the inner thoughts of a cis male presenting partner.

I am trans and this is very reflective of my body. (way to be vulnerable, huh?)

Hiccups that are mildly painful.

If there is anything else that I haven't covered that you believe needs a CW, please tell me.

The Plan

“No,” Atticus replied to Otto’s request for what seemed to have been a hundred times this month. They knew they were exaggerating on the number of times he asked, but any time Otto brought the subject up they bristled with anxiety and inner turmoil.

“Hear me out,” Otto implored.

“Otto,” they said, his name nearly whined in desperation.

They were at the kitchen table having lunch. Otto had fixed pesto tortellini with chicken. Atticus’ birthday was tomorrow and for some reason Otto had gotten fixated on a topic that made Atty uncomfortable.

“No, no, I know! I know. I know why you don’t want me to do it. I know you don’t need me to hiccup to love me. I know you don’t want me to hurt my body by making it happen instead of letting it happen naturally. I hope, with how long we’ve been married, that the fears of me taking advantage or teasing you would have gone away. And because we communicate so well, those fears of resentment from you wanting me to induce that you think I will somehow develop are a non-issue. Mainly because you never let me induce...but-but Atty, hey,” Otto stopped talking and encouraged his partner to look at him. “I want to do this. I am acting completely of my own free will. Additionally, I know my body pretty damn well. I know my limits and I’m not going to hurt myself. Trust me, I am way past the hurting myself stage in my life.” Not for lack of a lot more lessons than it took the normal person, Otto added silently.

“Also,” Otto continued enthusiastically, “and this is perhaps my most damning evidence that you would enjoy this more than you’re letting on, I know for a fact that the videos and audio files you play of people inducing hiccups are some of your favorites.” He said this with a pointed mischievous glare.

Atty glared back with less folly but not as much malice as they’d wanted to express.

“I, mm, I-I just,” Atticus started, stuttering and huffing. “I ju-ugh! I just feel so...so guilty!”

“Guilty?” Otto asked with a concerned face. “Why?”

“I don’t know! I just...do! I don’t want you to-to have to do anything like that for me. It’s just—it’s my thing and I don’t want you to have to pander to it like that,” Atticus finally spat out. They groaned and put their head in their hands. Otto’s soft reply encouraged them to look up again.

“I know I don’t have to do it. I don’t feel obligated. I want to do it. It’s not just you who gets something out of it. Trust me, you’re not the selfish one here. You get turned on and share that with me and then...I get turned on. And now whenever I get the hiccups and I’m alone I get turned on by them thinking about how turned on you would be if you were there. Figure that one out. Let’s just say I’m not sharing that one with my therapist,” Otto said widening his eyes for emphasis.

Atticus experienced a little whiplash at that admission. First of all, Otto had admitted it so casually that they hadn’t realized the implication of what he’d said until he’d finished the statement completely and they found themselves backtracking their memory to make sure they’d heard it correctly. Secondly, being reminded that Atticus wasn’t the only one experiencing arousal should have been an obvious statement but it still took them by surprise that while Otto was so obviously giving something of arousal to Atticus that the writer was also providing Otto with an equal amount of arousal.

For some reason, to them, it always felt like Otto was doing most of the work. But obviously he didn’t see it that way.

They must’ve been quiet for a while because they felt Otto’s finger poke the middle of their forehead and they frowned, swatting at it.

“Just checking if I broke anything…” he said with a smirk.

“No…” Atticus said, scowling. Then their face turned thoughtful, eyes wide as they looked at him. “So you really get...aroused when you…”

Otto chuckled, “I really do.”

“Even when I’m not there.”

“Yup,” he confirmed. “I suspect that it’s some sort of memory activation. Sort of...my brain has gotten used to the pattern of having hiccups meaning that I’m going to be aroused and so my big brain talks to my little brain,” he said pointing downward, “and says, ‘Hey buddy! Remember this? You’re about to get some...fun...horny things happening!’ and my little brain is like, ‘Oh yeah! Horny things! On it!’ And that’s, you know, sort of how it goes. I...was about to say it’s more nuanced than that, but it’s really not. Little brain doesn’t really work with subtleties a lot. It’s very Id based.”

“And I almost choked on a piece of chicken!” Atty said, still coughing a little from the surprise and laughing at the dialogue.

“I did notice that,” Otto interjected.

“I had no idea you reacted that way…even when I’m not there. Okay,” they said with a sigh and put their fork down as a marker of decision, granted a nervous marker. “So...how is this going to work exactly?”

“I’m so glad you asked,” Otto said, smirking. “How long has it been since I even had morning hiccups?”

“I dunno, as while, I think,” Atticus said, feigning casualness.

“Yeah, you do. Pull out your phone. Tell me when I last had them.”

Atticus scoffed, not moving at first, but they eventually pulled their phone out from the pocket of their sweat pants sheepishly. They pulled up their calendar app and scrolled through the months.

“Um...around 13 weeks? Three months? I think, maybe, you had a few teasers but not a real case...I don’t really mark the teasers. I’m neurotic, but not that neurotic,” they said.

Otto nipped the phone from their hand suddenly but before he turned it around he met their eyes.

“Can I see? I just want to see how you mark it,” Otto said.

Atticus hesitated, but sighed. “Okay, fine.”

Otto turned the phone around and scrolled for a bit before amusement lit in his eyes and he smiled.

“Awww,” he said. “A bubble emoji? Like in Dumbo when he hiccups bubbles? That’s really cute! Oh, and you put multiple bubble emojis for multiple cases on the same day? Coffee bubbles...for my coffee hiccups! Hee! No, this is good. I like this. I mean, I dunno what a stranger would think. Weird shower schedule or—”

The phone was yanked back.

“Okay! Yeah! That’s enough! Sir!” Atticus said, pocketing the phone again swiftly, neck feeling hot with embarrassment. “So, how is this gonna work? What...how are you gonna do it? Also, stop looking at me adoringly or I’m going to stab you with this fork.”

“I love when you flirt with me,” Otto responded, leaning on his hand again with a smile. He ignoring their glare as he continued, “I am going to continue eating this pasta tonight a little later than I should. I’m also going to add just a little bit more spice to it. Just something to sort of...invigorate the vagus nerve, if you will. And then I’m going to have one of those sparkling waters before I go to bed. Setting the stage.

“Tomorrow, if I don’t have them by my first cup of coffee, I’ve got a root beer in there and if that doesn’t work...honestly I got nothing. I’m kind of counting on that root beer.”

“You’ve put a lot of thought into this,” Atticus remarked, impressed.

“I have. This weekend might be when your party is, but tomorrow is the day I get to celebrate you and I’m not missing the chance to make this as good a day as I can for you. Oh, and I found a new antique’s mall that I want to show you if you’re up for it,” he said.

“Okay, I’m in. You inducing, antiquing...I am there!”

“Seriously? The antiquing got you over me inducing hiccups for you?” Otto said, put out.

“What? No! I...no, it’s just. Otto. I am going to find a fucking banjo clock if it kills me. And that’s your fault, by the way. You made me this into clocks,” they said.

“We live in a house literally lined with clocks on every wall, you know,” he said.

“And not one damn banjo clock. Not one! It’s your fault for telling me about it in the first place. Banjo clocks are so sexy.”

Otto gave them a look.

“Not in that way! I’m not—I don’t have a clock fetish. It’s a turn of phrase!” Atticus argued.

“I wouldn’t blame you, though. Winding a mainspring? Oof. Really gets me going. And putting a pendulum in beat—hey!” he exclaimed with something wet plopped on his cheek. “Did you just throw a noodle at me?!”

The lunch devolved into a miniature food fight.

That night Otto made good on his plan to overindulge on carbs. Atticus made him promise that if he felt uncomfortable or ill that he would cure his hiccups and take an antacid. Even though Otto had explicitly, without a doubt, claimed he wanted to do this Atty couldn’t help but feel nervous. But as they laid down next to their husband and snuggled a little into his soft shoulder they couldn’t help but feel excited as well.

The Induction

The morning started with Otto shifting a little in waking up. Atticus had snuggled into his arm during the night and though they moved quite a bit they found the place again and had rested for the majority of the rest of the night in the soft warmth.

Usually Otto kept a pretty early schedule but the carb intake last night caused him to be drowsy this morning and he startled a little realizing he’d woken up at 7am. To him, that was sleeping in. Atticus stirred beside him before looking up at him sleepily.

“Hey,” they said, voice lower than usual in morning hoarseness.

It reminded Otto of how low Atticus’ voice actually was. Even as their voice had lowered thanks to the testosterone they tended to speak in their higher range. Otto assumed it was habit. But hearing the lower octaves Atticus could utter did something to the clock maker. He enjoyed the gravel.

Otto went to reply but he paused, tucking his chin as his stomach and chest jerked.

Atticus’ eyes went wide and alert and Otto had to chuckle.

“Just a belch,” he said, softly. “Little gassy.” He gave another soft burp and sighed.

The writer tried to hide the disappointment from their face.

“You feel okay?” they asked.

“Yeah. A little ‘hung over’ and bloated from the carbs. I woke up later than I planned,” he said, rubbing his eyes. He yawned and stretched.

Atticus yawned in response and rubbed their eyes with the heel of their hand. They grabbed for their glasses so they could see.

“What time is it?” they asked.

“After 7,” he said.

“...gross,” Atty said with a huff and almost wanted to roll back around and go back to sleep, except there was an excited energy they couldn’t ignore.

“You can go back to bed if you want. Happy Birthday, by the way,” he said and gave them a little kiss on their forehead.

It had been established that the only kiss Atticus didn’t need consent for was a forehead kiss. As such, Otto tended to give them out abundantly when he wanted to show his love. He loved watching the tired, grumpy face of his partner morph into a sheepish little smile and their small body sigh in contentment.

“Thank you. I love you,” they replied laying their cheek on his shoulder.

“I love you, too,” he said.

“I’m up now. And, honestly? Really curious to see if your plan is gonna work, today,” Atticus admitted.

“Hmm. Well. I guess I’ll go make some coffee then…”

“Cool. Tell me when it’s ready,” Atty said, and turned around in bed again, closing their eyes as they took off their glasses.

Otto laid there for a beat, a little amused at the reaction, “Okay then!”

As it turned out, coffee was not the instigator they’d both hoped for. Otto was certainly gassy this morning, but the hiccups were elusive despite the clock maker feeling like he was going to get them. He described the feeling as a sort of pressure in his throat. It was like a sneeze that wouldn’t come out, almost.

They both decided before Otto tried the root beer that it would probably be a good idea to have breakfast. Otto went all out. He made all of Atticus’ favorite breakfast items. When all was done there were plates with belgium waffles with fruit and whipped cream next to eggs over-easy and sausage patties and breakfast potatoes. The coffee was a peaberry blend, light roast. Otto made it in a chemex because both the blend and the brewing technique tended to be Atticus’ preference. It was the small things Otto had recorded in his mind that made Atticus feel wholly seen and loved.

Atticus literally couldn’t finish it all, but saved what they couldn’t eat for later. Being a “small king,” as their friends called them, putting away food wasn’t really what their body did best. Otto accomplished more on the food front, but he had already felt a little bloated so he ate less than he normally would. Still, it was much more than Atticus. But that was just a matter of mass. Otto was more than a foot taller than Atty, after all, and much broader though he still read as a lanky man with his long limbs and torso. The writer coveted the clock maker’s soft belly, though. Society be damned, sculpted muscles had never been their thing.

They both came away from breakfast feeling sufficiently full from the feast. Atticus collapsed on the couch in the living room while Otto insisted on cleaning up by himself. It was usually Atty who cleaned up as he did most of the cooking, but because it was their birthday they were shooed away with their coffee mug to luxuriate while their husband took care of the chores.

Atticus watched Otto’s tall form navigate the kitchen, his long arms easily reaching the cabinets and his long legs quickly navigating the space between placing objects in their proper places. They caught him belching and burping a few more times, rubbing his stomach absently as if coaxing more gas out.

After that breakfast, Atticus felt their own stomach was a little distended as well, but not painfully so. It was a pleasant plumpness, like Otto’s presented. Atticus was happy to have the shape they did. After their top surgery and hormone replacement therapy they grew fond of the way weight distributed in their middle and the softness it gave them. They appreciated it as much on their own body as they did on Otto’s.

Finally, with one final reach of Otto’s arm into the refrigerator to grab the root beer, the clock maker made his way from the open kitchen to the couch and settled himself next to Atticus.

“You didn’t talk much during breakfast,” he noted.

“I was too busy enjoying it,” Atticus said, sipping their coffee and watching Otto’s hand twist off the top of the brown glass bottle.

“Mm,” Otto said with suspicion. “You weren’t too busy watching every time I burped to make sure I wasn’t hiccuping?”

Atticus sputtered a little, glad they had swallowed the coffee before his question.

“I—” they said, about to deny it, “Well. I mean. Maybe…”

Otto laughed softly.

“I’m not teasing you too much, am I?” Otto asked, checking in.

“No,” Atticus responded seriously, shaking their head. “It’s kind of cute. I like it.”

Otto put the bottle up to his mouth and then lowered it suddenly, “Oh good, cause I just wanted to make sure.” He took the bottle up again and lowered it. “I just didn’t want it to seem like I was being cruel.” the lip of the bottle almost reached his lips when he lowered it once more. “Because sometimes I have a tendency to over d—”

“I swear to gawd…” Atticus interrupted him in a calm but stern voice having been following the path of that bottle every time he raised it.

“I can hear the threat of bodily injury in your voice,” he said, amused.

“Drink it!” Atty exclaimed.

“Guess it’s not cute anymore,” he muttered, his voice echoing into the neck of the bottle as he finally took a few healthy gulps of the root beer.

At the last swallow Atticus watched Otto’s body spasm suddenly. This was more than just a suppressed burp.

Otto lowered the bottle to his lap and his body jerked two more times, silent hiccups rocking his body backwards. “I think I’ve got ‘em,” he said, face concentrating as another hiccup jerked his head back with a little squeak from his throat. He also released a couple more airy belches as the hiccups continued interspersed. “They’re a little heurp!-a little weak. I’m gonna drink a little more.”

“Okay,” was all Atticus could say as they felt excitement thrum through them like electricity that all of the anticipation was leading to him actually getting the hiccups...for them. They felt an emotion beyond simple arousal, but one filled of gratitude that they hadn’t expected feeling.

As Otto downed the rest of the bottle Atty enjoyed watching his stomach jiggle softly with the hiccups triggered by his gulping. Still, they noticed, the hiccups he’d developed weren’t as fast or hard as his normal hiccups.

Otto had his hand on his chest as he waited for one hiccup after another. He seemed to notice their lack of boisterousness, too. They were squeaky, airy hiccups. While it was humorous to hear the higher pitched hiccups come out of Otto compared to the huskiness of his regular hiccups, they didn’t seem to create as much body movement. Still, Atticus was extremely excited to see his hiccups at all after so long.

“These are different, right? Heulp! Than my regular hiccups? Not as hyup!-as fast or strong?” he asked.

“Yeah, but that’s okay,” Atty said. They cuddled close to him, putting a hand on his belly as it bounced in another spasm.

But Otto seemed to be thinking about something, eyes narrowed in consideration. Atty listened to his chest as he released another soft burp and hiccuped right after.

“I have an id-idea,” he said, jolting with another silent hiccup. “I’m gonna hold my breath.”

To anyone else this would’ve seemed counter productive to the goal, but both Atticus and Otto knew that when he’d tried to cure his hiccups in the past by holding his breath it made them remarkably worse. Specifically, Otto’s hiccups became even faster than normal.

Atty hadn’t seen this themselves, but they’d been told by Otto that for about a minute after holding his breath they would speed up quite a bit before calming back down to his normal pace (which was still quite fast compared to other people’s hiccups).

The speed of those hiccups apparently startled his friend, then roommate, so much that he suggested going to the hospital. But Otto laid down to see if they would go away on their own first and they did, eventually. It was the longest time he’d had the hiccups (sober), a little over 5 hours in total.

Knowing this story brought some concern to Atticus.

“You sure?” they asked.

“Yeah,” Otto said. “If they get too bad w-hmp!-we’ll cure them. I just feel like these aren’t go-gonna last very long.” He gave a soft chuckle. “I hope I don’t end up-up curing them.”

Even Otto’s weak hiccups had a pretty decent effect on his body. The indentations in his neck might not have been as deep but his body still jerked and swayed with every hiccup. Atticus rubbed his back reflexively.

“Alright,” they agreed.

Otto took a large breath in and held it. For a moment nothing happened. There wasn’t even a hiccup after the time there had been before. Otto shot Atticus a frown of disappointment. Had it cured them after all? But then there was a hard hiccup and it jerked Otto’s body so hard that it shocked them both.

The clock makers hand went to his chest instinctively. Another hiccup barreled in close to the last. And then almost immediately after that a third hiccup shot through his body, throwing his head back as he widened his eyes in surprise. After that they were coming pretty consistently.

Atticus immediately felt their body react to the stimuli. Between their legs started pulsing as Otto let out his breath to a cacophony of newly energized hiccups.

“Hu-uck!-huuck!-h’muck!-huck!-HUCK!-HUCK!-hmk!-hmmmk!-hmmMMK!-I-mk!-I thmmk!-think th-uck!-that dihip!d it!” Otto struggled to say.

He turned toward Atticus and the writer watched his head be forced back over and over again. Anyone else wracked with such strong and fast hiccups might have a hint of distress on his face. Otto’s face held a soft smile, though his brows scrunched a little at each hiccup.

“Do-huck!-you-h’muck!huck!HNK!-wa-hmk!-nthup’k!-humk!-to-huck!-hu-uck!-go-unk!mk!huUCK!-upsta-hrk!hrk’l!-huck!-stairs?” Otto eventually got out.

‘Do you want to go upstairs?’ Atticus translated in their head through the nearly blinding arousal that hit them.

Otto’s head bobbed with each hiccup. His stomach was visible through the tight white undershirt and it jiggled in reverb as the hiccups kept forcing it over the edge of the waistband of his plaid pajama pants.

Despite Otto being the one that should’ve been rendered speechless by his hiccups’ speed, Atticus found themselves not able to verbalize a response in the throws of their excitement and simply nodded in agreement.

The couple traversed the stairs to their bedroom single-file, as the narrowly designed stairwell only allowed as such. Atticus kept their hand on Otto’s ever bouncing back as they followed him. The sound of his hiccups, which were louder as he exerted himself with the climb up, echoed off the walls.

They came in doubles and triples in between small second respites where Otto found his breath. The clock maker realized that it would have been smarter to induce in their bedroom once they both finally landed on the bed. His hiccups were giving him very little leeway in catching his breath. He forgot how exhausted he got when they had been this fast before. But, unlike before, he was also getting excited. He wanted nothing more than to give Atticus the very best for their birthday and, judging by his partner’s face as they sat down on the edge of the bed next to him and rubbed his back in acknowledgment of his struggles, he was succeeding.

“You good?” they asked, checking in on him. They’d never seen him hiccup this fast so consistently.

He was still on the edge of the bed and was leaning his elbows on his knees. His body was jerking upward every half-second. The hiccups had gotten rounder and sharper as they continued, interspersed with his normal lower and huskier hiccups.

“Hup!-hup!-hup!-hup!-mk!hpk!-hmp!hup!-huUP!-hulp!-huck’l!-hip!hip!-hip!hip!hup!” Otto had attempted to talk but had given it up. Instead he nodded and put a thumb up.

The Saucy Bit

He scooted back on the bed and used a pillow to prop himself up as he pulled out the drawer of the nightstand to dig out supplies. When he looked up he saw Atticus had already begun to disrobe. Their top surgery scar, running across their entire chest from one side to the other and peaking at the middle in curvature, picked up the reflection of the sun through the window. The thickened skin was raised in places a little, hypertrophic scarring that had never decided to settle into the small white line the other parts of the scar had taken on.

The writer was self-conscious about the thickness of the scars, but Otto loved the texture they made as he rubbed his fingers across them as he did now while they leaned forward to take off their sweatpants. They smiled at Otto’s touch trying to set their head against his while he explored their chest but was unsuccessful with how hard Otto’s hiccups continued to jerk his head back rapidly.

As usual, Atticus left their boxers on. Otto never questioned why they didn’t want to expose themselves fully, but he could only guess at the dysphoria they may feel so he trusted them to create that boundary without having to spell it out.

Otto was delighted that Atticus still allowed him to explore their anatomy, though. Being able to actively increase their arousal when they were already aroused by touching them was euphoric. He loved how different Atticus felt to his fingers than anyone else he’d been with, vagina or penis. He had greatly enjoyed experimenting with them to see what felt best and how much pressure to give and where.

With this being in his mind, even while hiccuping madly from his self induction, he rerouted Atticus’ body when they came toward him while facing him. He had an idea and he was having trouble verbalizing anything so he hoped his non-verbal manipulations of their body would translate.

Atticus was confused at first, but at the encouragements of Otto’s hands on their body they found themselves turned to face away from him. Then Otto pressed their back into his front and they suddenly realized why. They could feel every movement facing this way. It was like when they were in the park underneath that tree during Mark’s birthday. Otto, now stripped down nude, was flush to Atticus’ back as he leaned on the pillow cushioning him from the headboard of the bed.

Atticus’ body jerked with Otto’s and they took a breath at the rush of arousal that hit them. They felt his stomach spasm in the small of their back while simultaneously feeling his chest jerk away from them. As usual, Otto found Atty’s neck and nuzzled, his hiccups jerking his head across their shoulder and the loudness of some of them hitting Atticus’ ears increasing their arousal all the more.

“HUP!-HUP!-HUP!-HUCKAH!-huck!huck!-huck’m!-mk!-hup’k!-huppah!huck!-h’muck!-mk!mk!-huck!…” and so on as Otto’s excitement continued.

To say Otto wasn’t getting tired from the onslaught would be a lie. But the excitement he felt as he continued to get harder and harder with each squirm Atticus made and each gasp of ecstasy they let out was worth whatever consequences he might face from the strength and speed of this case.

When Atticus’ hand made to relieve and pleasure Otto he pushed it away.

“Le-hup!-Let-hup!-me-huck!huck!-focu-ulp!-focu—f-hulp!-s on-hup!-on-hup!-yo-hup!hup-you!” he said, struggling. ‘Let me focus on you.’

With a gasp, and boy had Atticus been doing that a lot, they felt Otto’s long fingers slick with lube travel under the front their boxers from behind. They whimpered as he coated them and started his slow administrations. Atticus’ body pressed into Otto’s behind them, legs opening.

Otto’s hand and fingers would twitch as his body lurched with hiccups in between the soft and focused movements and, every time, Atticus found their body jerking in time with the twitches and hiccups. They lost themselves in Otto’s fingers and body and sounds. They moaned and cussed and hissed until breathy gasps hit them when Otto stroked faster against them and they felt the cold hot rush travel up and down their body with a shivering arch of their back and final whimper and their body fully relaxed into the cushion of Otto’s body, still jerking with hiccups.

It took them a few moments to open their eyes, not realizing they’d closed them, and turn toward their husband, head craning up and back to catch his pinched expression of arousal. Knowing, somehow, that Atticus was responsible for that intense look brought a warmth into them they didn’t know quite how to explain.

Otto had already started to grab himself, no longer able to hold back his own needs. Really, he didn’t need lube or a condom and only used the latter for quicker cleanup. He was uncircumcised and made full advantage of his ability to pleasure himself so freely.

“Can I watch?” Atticus breathed, voice as low as their register would go and husky with recent climax.

Otto shivered at their voice and nodded quickly as Atticus turned around. They watched him as he whimpered in stimulated arousal between the spasms his throat was still emitting. Atticus settled themselves beside his body, hand on his stomach, half straddled on his thigh.

Otto locked eyes with his spouse, dark eyes to dark eyes, his hooded by his prominent brow and theirs behind the lenses of their glasses. His hiccups stayed fast but became squeaky, desperate, as he closed his eyes. The feeling of moistness on his thigh from Atticus’ wet soaked crotch through their underwear broke him through with a grunt as he gasped and relaxed, opening his eyes finally and blinking.

The Afterglow

He could feel Atty’s head next to his neck, now, in the crook of his shoulder. He could feel their hand slowly massaging his belly and he realized he did, indeed, still have the hiccups. But, small miracles, they weren’t as fast. Though they were still strong.

“Hu-UCK! Aaah. Mmm. Hu-mmk! Uh. MMK! Mmm,” he muttered as he rubbed his chest.

“Starting to hurt?” Atticus asked, lips moving on his chest before looking up at him.

“Not yet Hu-ulk!-mmm. Just h’plmk!-uh, just tight. Huppah!” he gave a sigh. Some of them were still a little squeaky and it was starting to tickle his throat. He cough-hiccuped a couple of times in response, holding a fist over his mouth. He plapped his hand back down on his chest after he cleared the irritation.

Otto felt his partner’s hand on his cheek and he let his head be guided lazily to their eyes.

“Thank you,” they said passionately.

“That was-huck!-that was good? Huck’m!” he asked.

Atticus took a hand to his chest and gave it a brief massage that elicited a hiccuping sigh from Otto.

“That was amazing,” they confirmed. “I’m going to kiss you, now.”

“Ooh-hoop!” Otto exclaimed, straightening up a little bit past the pillow that cushioned him in excitement.

Atty giggled at the movement and expression on his face, eager and earnest. They held his cheek again, loving the rough texture of his short beard on their palm, and leaned in to provide their thanks in a kiss far past their normal chaste fare.

Otto hiccuped once, hard, in the middle of the kiss and as the kiss ended he hiccuped again just as forcefully. His head met the back of the headboard sharply with a crack that probably sounded worse than the impact.

“Ow!” he yelped, holding the back of his head with a wince.

“Holy crap, man!” Atticus said placing their hand over his on the spot where he’d impacted. “Wow, way to ruin a moment!”

“Mmk!-uh, thanks for the sym-mmp!-sympathy huck-ah!” Otto said, the last hiccup hitting him with such force that it sent his head back toward the same spot it had hit before. Fortunately both his and Atticus’ hands prevented it from impacting this time.

“Alright, sit up! Sit up! I do not want a concussed husband for my birthday,” Atty insisted. “You need an antacid? Or cure? I got that lemon juice the other day at the store so you don’t have to keep biting into lemons. Bad for your teeth.”

As Atticus’ hand finally trailed off the back of his hand and down his face before departing completely, Otto sat up, slouching a little, and smiled fondly. The position made his hiccups more apparent and he rubbed his neck feeling the muscles there pull. He’d not had hiccups in so long that he’d forgotten how sore his neck got when they were that fast. Talk about repetitive motion injury. But, spying one of his many clocks, he realized he hadn’t really had them for that long. Though the pleasure he experienced with Atty had made time seem a lot slower. Their speed certainly did a number on his body, though.

“Mmm-hmuck!-mm. Shower fir-erk!-irst?” he suggested. “And I need to holmk!-need to thro-mmk!-throw these sh-hip!-sheets in the washer while mmk!-uh while I’m thinking of it HILP!”

“Shower does sound nice,” Atticus agreed.

“You go st-HERP!-start it while I thr-hup!-throw these in the mmk!-laundry?” he asked, gathering the sheets as they both slid off the bed at last.

“Okay,” they said with a smile and a small kiss to his cheek as he bent down to collect the linens.

Shower-time (implied nudity)

Atticus stood in the shower letting the warmth through their hair and over their body. Their muscles were still charged and they were still a little sensitive from Otto’s birthday present. Just reminiscing the way he looked and how it felt was enough to get them a little excited again.

These sessions they had were infrequent compared to other couples, but absolutely worth the wait. And chances were high that even after this case ended Otto was bound to get them again a few more times before the end of the day.

Atty heard the bathroom door open and: ~H’MUCK!~

The sound shot around the room bouncing sharply off of every surface in a reverberating tinny echo.

“Shit!” Atticus startled. They held the bar of the glass shower door to keep themselves from falling.

“Damn! That wa~higgup!~-uh, was loud. ~hmmk!~” Otto said, covering his mouth to the last hiccup, though it still found a way to echo in the small bathroom. “Sorry!”

“It’s okay!” Atty said pulling the glass door back and peeking out. “Come on in.”

He stepped into the tub and pulled the door to behind. ~Hk-mmp!~ He was trying to muffle them now to prevent the loudness, but now that Atticus was prepared for it his hiccups sounded amazing when amplified by the bathroom’s acoustics.

“I can’t tell,” they said as they moved aside to let him wash water over himself, “are they worse or is it just the bathroom making them sound worse?”

This was the writer’s casual way of checking in on their husband to make sure they were okay. Those hiccups had been no joke. And he’d let them get that way on purpose because of them. While Atticus was touched by the gesture, they were aware that having the hiccups like he had was exhausting and possibly painful.

“I think it’s the ~hulp!~ the bathroom-~HUP!~ Shit! Sorry!” Otto said covering his mouth and then putting the hand on his chest as his head jerked back a few moments after with another that he silenced. That last loud one had taken him by complete surprise.

Atticus couldn’t help but chuckle a little.

“It’s okay. I kind of like how it makes them sound,” they admitted. They said this while lathering up their hands and starting to wash his stomach and chest.

Were the silicone scrubbers much more efficient at washing than soap and hands? Yes. But any excuse to touch their partner’s belly and watch the hiccups continue to affect him was worth the deficit.

“Yeah?” Otto said, looking down at their administrations with a smile and a, “~HUCK-uh!~”

He laughed at the ridiculous way the sound carried his hiccup which made him hiccup again, this one a little squeakier. “~HILK!~” Which made him guffaw and he eventually released a, “~huUUCK!~” But that one made him wince as his stomach and chest told his brain that all of this hiccuping nonsense was getting a bit much by sending a little spike of pain into his core.

“Oof…” Atticus responded sympathetically.

“Ugh. ~hu-UCK!~ Yeah. I’m def—definitely getting rid of ~h’MUCK!~ of these before ~mk!mk!~ before going to the antique’s ~humpk!~ store. Ow…” he hissed and then looked sheepish. “Sorry…”

“No apologies necessary,” they said reaching up to caress his face. “You jacked up your diaphragm for me and I am very grateful but you definitely need a break.”

He laughed a little in response, it ending in a “~hu-UP!~” that encouraged him to take a deep measured breath in an attempt to soothe his abused diaphragm.

“Can I ~huULP~ wash the rest of my body, now? ~ULP!~-uh!” he asked as he watched Atticus continue to circle the soap along his chest and belly, his body hair there swirling in response to the movements of their hands.

Atticus paused and looked up, glint of mischief in their eyes for just a moment before they rolled their eyes and sighed dramatically.

“Okay, fine!” they relented.

They turned away from him (and quite possibly the most adequately cleaned belly and chest on the planet) to soap up their own body as he chuckled again.

Planning for the Next Installment (no hiccups)

After both of them had showered and dressed Otto made quick work of curing his hiccups. They had finally started to settle down anyway after the shower and by the time he swallowed the shot of lemon juice they relented easily.

Popping an antacid for good measure, he ushered Atticus into the car.

“You’re up to something…” Atticus said suspiciously.

Otto was grabbing his seat belt and snapping it in with gusto when he looked up.

“Yeah I am! Up to some antiquing!” he said with a grin and a small pinch to his spouse’s shoulder. “C’mon, get your seat belt on!”

“Yeah...no...this is more than that,” Atticus replied as they buckled themselves with not quite as much energy as Otto had somehow revived after his show-stopping hiccups earlier.

“Pssh! What? No! I love antiquing! You know that!”

“Not this much. In fact, you usually get bored halfway through the lots,” they said, eyes narrowed.

“Okay. Do you actually want to keep asking questions?” Otto said, lips pinching closed and eyes wide in askance. His brows went up too as he cocked his head to the side. The expression and gesture implied that if Atticus wanted to be surprised then perhaps they should stop digging.

“...no,” Atticus decided.

“Good answer! Let’s go!” Otto exclaimed.

To be continued… (fondly written ellipses, not ominously)

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Hi Makenzie

I'm sorry for bothering you, but as I followed your blog for over a decade now and this is the first time I need to deal with questions around sexuality, it seemed to me like the best way to get good and trustworthy input was to ask you.

There's a lot of context to this, but the TL;DR is that I (a trans masc) used to staunchly believe I'm aroace (which I'm still not sure of that I'm not) until last month this person swaggered into my life and basically upended my understanding of myself by somehow making it so we're in a relationship together. That means that for the first time in 23 years I have to think about the downstairs equipment and, worse, use it.

Now, my partner is absolutely lovely, don't get me wrong, but I am very much not into sex at all. Or like, it's fun, but it's also a chore and while I like the intimacy of it all, I just... don't like sex. It's extremely painful and since my partner has been circumcised it takes so long to get them off (over 4 hours!), even on their own- the closest we've come to me being involved at all when they do is my letting them come in my mouth by some last-minute manouvering- and even so, after two times I physically cannot bring myself to do it again, which puts them off too.

I know one of your mottos is that orgasms aren't the end-all-be-all of sex, but it seems to be the only thing to make the whole ordeal worth it at all. It's like we're stuck in a feedback loop where I only put up with sex because I want them to enjoy themself, and they need to see me enjoy myself to enjoy themselves, but with them having a really hard time getting of and me being physically unable to (even on my own: I never feel anything, even if the muscle-spasms indicate something happened).

I'm very worried about the strain this will put on the relationship, since they told me on the very first day that they do need to get their rocks off, and while I'm fine with them watching porn to get off and the occasional comment that they would prefer me have the body of one of those actresses, I'm not secure enough in this whole relationship yet to just set them free sexually. Not in the least because a part of me doesn't want to lose the way our sexuality works atm. It's dysfunctional and painful, and there is practically no benefit to it at all, but it's fun having them so close. If only the rest of the deal didn't exist.

It's basically a lose-lose situation where I was wondering if you could tell me if I should be worried about the sheer amount of pain I experience with penetration (also with tampons: the two times I tried putting one in, I ended up crying on the bathroom floor because of the pain) and if you maybe have any advice regarding the rest of the whole shitshow.

Thanks in advance and have a nice day!

hi anon,

oh my god there's a lot to unpack here

before we get into the important stuff I just want to open by saying your partner's four hour plateau period is maybe not an outright medical marvel but is definitely unusual, and both scientific and anecdotal evidence indicate there's no particular reason why that should be linked to circumcision. I have no idea what would actually be causing that, but it's probably not a lack of foreskin! just wanted to point that out, because it's interesting.

anyway, and much more importantly: you two should not be having sex with each other and maybe need to just break up entirely.

literally every single thing about how you are talking about sex indicates to me that you don't want to be having it, you don't like it, it's painful, you don't see the point, you can't bring yourself to do it... literally stop doing it. stop that right now. there's literally nothing but trauma that's going to come from repeatedly forcing yourself into something that sucks this bad for you.

okay, so, where does this leave your partner? well, in grand sex witch style I am humbling suggesting that they either put up or shut up. sex is important to them and that's fine, wahoo yay sex, but they've chosen a partner who Does Not Want To Do Sex At All and that has consequences, namely that they do not get to have sex with that partner.

if you're uninterested in opening the relationship up (which is fine!) that means they either need to cope or y'all need to break up, which frankly sounds like it might be awesome for both of you based on everything you're saying here. no one is necessarily at fault here, but this is a major lack of compatibility that seems like it's only going to keep eating at both of you. there are lots of different ways to be intimate in a relationship, and you both deserve to find someone operating on a more similar frequency.

also, hey, this?

I'm fine with them watching porn to get off and the occasional comment that they would prefer me have the body of one of those actresses

you shouldn't be fine with that. talking about anyone's body like that is shitty, let alone an intimate partner. I would hit somebody with a car for that, personally.

also hey PS if tampons suck that much there's a chance you have vaginismus, a condition that causes the vaginal muscles to reflexively and often painfully tighten to prevent penetration. it's a fairly common condition that's often caused by anxiety or trauma, and in many cases the easiest solution is to Stop Putting Things In Your Vagina.

[genericmain]

I'm 24, Born in 2000

I'm Canadian

I'm Married (I know it's shocking)

I like anime, cartoons, horror, Spooky things, Crowcore, Podcasts but especially the magnus archives and protocol, I'm an artist & hobbyist writer (as in I don't really write so much as delete all my drafts), a poet, And I'm a lesbian.

I'm trans masc and it's taken a LONG time to figure that one out. I use He/Him pronouns and Ze/Zir/Fae/Faer pronouns. I have a slight preference for masc terms but I still identify as female, and gender queer. I'm seeing a wonderful nonbeanie who might be an egg, so we're seeing how that goes while they explore. You can call me Wren, if you gotta call me anything!

I can already hear the but haven't you talked about dysphoria and being a trans guy? Yes. Yes I did. Turns out self discovery is kind of hard. You can find out a bit more here. Nsfw warning for under the cut, it is the ONLY exception I've posted/will post but it does feel necessary to me to explain that too. The flag I use in my stuff jic.

This isn't my first time here, but I am hoping it'll be the last account I make unless I decide to write an interactive choose your own adventure blog again, that was fun. I'll keep y'all posted if I do.

That being said please kindly leave me alone if: you're a creep or a bigot of any kind, you sexualize kids, You're anti-systems/Any of my interests, You're here to start drama, You're gorey or gore related strictly, You post about self harm frequently or eating disorders, Or you think literal animals are sexy. Basically the standard DNI. Additionally, please don't interact with me if I can't interact back. Thanks. Adding: Pro-Ship, because pedophilliac relationships bad. I understand the argument of fiction, that argument was used by my pedo ex (confirmed that he had non fictional materials, no I didn't see them why would I want to) to try and convince me non fictional materials were okay too, so while I understand that fiction doesn't always equal reality.. I've seen evidence that it can. & I don't support that.

What is my policy on asks regarding donations?

Note: Some of these things are hands down worse than the others. Just because I am lumping them all together doesn't mean I think self harm is just as bad as being a pedo. Some of the things on this list are there specifically for my safety & comfort. I'm stating this plainly & explicitly because I know some people on this website struggle to differentiate between "I'm saying all these groups are bad in general" and "I'm saying all these groups are bad for me" and I quite frankly don't want to deal with that again.

You might see swearing here, I'm not sure honestly. It's a generic main blog. I'm not even sure I'll use it honestly.

Fictional others list:

Main F/O's

Asra - The Arcana (Non-canon system Fictive) QPP

Beidou - Genshin impact (Fictive/FO, kinda unclear) Partner.

H - OC (Fictional other)

Retired/Rarer F/O's

Kaeya - Genshin impact (semi canon) platonic

Itto - Genshin impact (Canon) Platonic

Arrlechino - Genshin impact (Semi canon) Platonic(?) Romantic(?)

There defo are more but I'm struggling to list them all. That being said, I don't think I have an issue with sharing outside of H? If you do I won't interact if I know, or be upset if you block me for it! I respect wanting to not share!

New list of ship names & tags

[bodhrancomedy]

I wasn’t going to respond to this, I looked at your blog. Your irrational hatred and bile directed towards trans people is palpable and pathetic. This was intended to upset me. 

But I now have a chance to talk about who my grandfather is. 

You see, I find it interesting that you claim the only way my 90yr old grandfather could possibly be so accepting is if he was dying of one of the most horrible diseases known to man, a condition which eats your brain from the inside out and turns you in an angry, scared shell of the child you once were while your family has to grieve you long before you’re dead. 

You find it easier - and evidently prefer - to believe that to accept me, my grandfather must have Alzheimer’s rather than any other reason. 

Why is that easier to believe than a man who lived through (not was born during, not was around for, lived through) the Second World War and the aftermath, seeing footage of the concentration camps and meeting refugees would be accepting?��

A poor builder and a farmer who worked alongside queer men and deaf men and the few people of colour in Northern Ireland in the 1950s and was himself barred from many places of employment and education due to his religion?

This man, whose oldest son was born the year the British army began occupying his country, who lived through the Troubles and was automatically considered suspicious and dangerous through an incident of birth? A man who helped raise six children - most of them boys and therefore in great danger of the army turning their guns on them for playing kid-games - in a time of civil war where it didn’t seem to matter which side you were on, the bombs and shootings could get you either way? A man who once was taken hostage by the IRA? 

My grandfather’s oldest son - my dad - was the first in his family to go to university and there he met and fell in love with a Protestant woman. This was before the Good Friday Agreement, when the civil war was still happening, and if my grandparents had a problem with it - they never let said to my mum. 

(My grandpa and my mum don’t really get along, but that’s more to do with me being a premature baby and tensions over my survival and disagreements on how to look after me. My mum and my Nana? Thick as thieves.) 

They certainly never let it slip to us when we came along because it wasn’t important anymore that we were something many people in Northern Ireland would have preferred to not exist. It didn’t matter. 

He voted in the Good Friday Agreement in hopes of stopping the conflict. He spent a lot of time listening to me about the bullying I was facing for being - unbeknownst to me at the time - queer and disabled. He just told me that being happy was far more important. 

Being trans? It does not matter. Of course it doesn’t matter to him because he’s seen worse things in the world. 

He’s ninety years old. He’s still out on the farm, he’s still studying history, he’s still sharp as fuck. I’ve seen someone die of Alzheimer's. I know every bit of it and it’s not him. Besides, I’ve not medically transitioned in anyway yet. He’s only seen me presenting fully masc for six days in person. Two years in total. If he had Alzheimer’s he’d be calling me by my deadname and using she/her. 

And he’s not unusual. Outside of your echo chamber, most people are fine with trans people. Most people don’t care. Most people are accepting. They may not understand, they may not use the right words, but they’re accepting. 

I do find it interesting that once again the TERF tactic is try and wrestle autonomy and self-control away from people who don’t follow your bigoted stances. Autistics must be being manipulated. Trans men are clearly confused little girls. Children obviously can’t understand their own minds and bodies. 

My grandfather must have Alzheimer's. 

Of course my view of a world I’ve seen in a Tumblr textpost must be more correct than the reality everyone else lives in. 

Have the day you deserve. 

My 90yr old Irish Catholic grandpa doesn’t miss with my gender. He’s never gotten my name wrong, or my pronouns, never even faltered over it.

It’s all so natural too: son, big man, young man…

We’ve never talked about it. He’s the only one who hasn’t pushed for details. He just accepted it and carried on because it’s not a huge deal.

It’s so comforting.

[xthelastknownsurvivorx]

we all know that sy goes through the most insane comp het mental gymnastics to convince himself that he's straight. and so i'm sure that sy would also do the most in order to convince himself he was cis despite plenty of evidence to contrary. but since gender and sexuality both inform and can have an impact on each other, he would be so much more infuriating and worse bc it would turn from one type of mental gymnastics into another before finally accepting both identities. if sy was trans masc i think it would go something like this:

first, he'd have naturally developed some crushes on boys in his class bc he is actually attracted to men and wouldn't repress himself bc it's "straight" attraction (since he still thinks he's a girl). however he would rationalize away any additional gender envy as also being romantic crushes, plus be like well everyone wants to be a boy/hero/fairy tale prince, that's why so many girls like fairy tales and why there are so many pieces of media coming out putting women in those roles haha, all while ignoring the fact that he does not tend to consume that media

eventually he would finally come to accept his gender identity as male and immediately flip the switch and rationalize away all and any romantic feelings he had/has towards men as having been solely gender envy and the result of comp het bc he thought he was a girl and girls are supposed to like boys, all while doing the same exact damn thing this time around but in reverse; also see: "of course i like lbh, he's the model of the perfect man that everyone should strive to be like with his protagonist op'ness and harem of beauties"

tl;dr sy having to figure out both his sexuality and gender would be that much more infuriating because he'd go straight (ha) from comp cis to comp het (or vice versa if you wish), all while being like wow glad i'm now over deceiving myself (he is very much not, he's got a whole 'nother crisis to get thru)

[ursie]

Why do you keep calling Shatterstar gnc? He’s always been masculine? Just because he’s Bi doesn’t mean he has to be effeminate you know

Ok so I’ve gone back and fourth on how seriously I was gonna answer this so I’m sorry this took a bit to answer anyway here we go : I’m sorry if this makes no sense I’m tired

First off it’s important to remember in media what’s considered masculine and what’s not so while a lot of Star may be considered either or what’s important to remember is when him being a warrior, fighter/ect is being emphasized that’s them playing up traditional masculine characteristics and his presentation or softer moments is them playing up “feminine” characteristics (obv this is stupid but it’s also undeniably how people write characters 99% of the time)

Second off there is textual evidence he is at least viewed as gnc in universe in X Force-many comments were made about his makeup, hair (also I remember the pigtails) and general demeanor. Was it done in a ala homophobia way? Absolutely is it still canon? Yes (also so much worse now that it’s retroactively canonically homophobic as he’s literally Bi and definitely had a known thing w Julio at the time-so..way to teach him micro aggressions guys)

Now post x force in xfi he is drawn and written as far more traditionally masc, in appearance and presentation- even his body type seemed to change-as in x force he was described as acrobatic and fast, avoiding hits when he could in xfi he’s made into a brick house that just. Tanks hits-far more direct-even his fighting is made out to be more traditionally masculine

Now this could be broken down to character development (which we did not see and it’s important to note I can’t stress how ooc xfi Star is) but really it just reads as more homophobia as not only is Star aware enough of homophobia and gender roles to adapt to a more accepted persona (because the x force taught him homophobia) but also the writers at the time when he was canonically Bi went out of their way to adapt his character to both fit and avoid different stereotypes-he’s allowed to be a walking slutty Bi stereotype (which is literally so ooc) but can no longer be gnc-he’s allowed to be slutty and hit on women despite his relationship w Julio but he’s not allowed to present as anything less than “macho” in summary Star was just made palatable in all of the worst ways to straight audiences-they stereotypes they love were forced and the ones that make them uncomfortable were dropped

Later on we’re back to getting glimpses of less than traditionally “masc” only a warrior Star w him cooking for Julio and buying him a sweater in new mutants (which are not actually feminine traits but are presented as feminine/gay traits in media even lampshaded by what’s his name asking of his boyfriend bought his sweater to Julio (which he did-also another micro aggression marvel forces me to witness))

(There was that super racist x force run I didn’t read that came out around here-Star was back to being a super warrior macho macho man idk it was bad and the art was racist ignore it )

The slightly less masc Star is dropped in the Shatterstar solo where his character is p much completely retconned but also another more traditionally masc Star is pushed again w the crux of his problems w Julio being “they don’t fight enough”, the emphasizing of him still being a warrior despite how the crux of his character was trying to define himself out of that role assigned to him, there are definitely homophobic connotations to what’s her name (yes he’s Bi him having an ex who’s a girl isn’t the issue it’s the entire plot that is), and even weirder connotations with the use of his slave name/dead name as his go to name-he has only ever referred to himself as Shatterstar-that’s his name-other people either call him Shatterstar or Star-giving him a “traditionally masculine” name is certainly. A choice. There are a lot of problematic elements to the solo to unpack but the rest don’t really have to w the homophobia and forced gender roles Star seems to consistently face

Then in (new) xfi he’s gone something happened he’s on Mojoworld again he has long hair again (king) but his outfit is a wrestling one and his “masculinity” is once again emphasized with his being forced into being a warrior again just to like. Be on the island being tasked w immediately fighting Terry (I actually liked this scene but there were some choices about to consider especially about how the rest of the mutants still seem to view him)-and now we’re here where we’re right back to where we started w long hair, just left Mojoworld, definitely a warrior you can’t forget it Star. Only this time his identity isn’t up for interpretation or debate.

So long story short while Star may not be consistently gnc it was noticeable enough that once he was openly Bi they immediately started pushing for a more masculine Star and you can see the difference in characters as xforce Star and xfi Star might as well be different people. Stars ambiguous gender non conformity was enough that Marvel seems set on “fixing it” and writers are constantly walking a line in making sure he’s “not like those other gays” despite the fact that apparently he used to be. There is def canon evidence for a more gnc/less traditionally masc Star. No one is saying (but me) that he should be a Femme Bi dude they’re just saying they see him as gnc and like. Yeah he was🤷‍♀️

Also narratively him being Trans makes wayyy more sense also his people are machine made why do they even have different sexes or genders let alone follow the earths idea of it like he’s an alien., why would he care about the our perception of the sexes or gender- main point is he should be Nb and intersex but that’s another conversation

Anyway Star gnc king

Also yes just because he’s Bi doesn’t make him effeminate-he’s effeminate-not because of his sexuality - it is not his gender presentation despite how much it undoubtedly influenced it. People aren’t calling Star gnc because he’s Bi they’re calling him gnc because he used to look like this

[babsaros]

First of all, i want to sincerely say thank you for the way you’ve formatted your response; it allows me to see exactly which statements you’re misinterpreting, perhaps because you’re cutting around the parts where I explain those statements. So, I’ll respond in kind and see if I can’t break this down a bit more simply:

“Listen, I have been gender non-conforming in a [misogynistic] household and I am telling you, that being a trans man makes that experience different.”

So, this is anecdotal evidence at best. I mean, we’re not merely talking about living environments growing up, we’re talking about systems of oppression normalized throughout society at large and all walks of life. Nearly every household in America is misogynistic because our society is built on patriarchy.  

->“You understand trans women when they say that they are treated worse when they identify as trans women, rather than gnc men, why do you not comprehend trans men saying basically the same thing?” 

The whole point is that men hold more power, control and influence than women, de facto, point blank, end of. GNC men are still perceived as men, because they are men. You cut off my original post before i go on to explain the very first statement, that trans men are specifically not perceived as men by transphobes. If it were possible, you would not see hardcore denialist transphobic parents still referring to their child as a “daughter”, even after “she” has transitioned into a ripped beefcake with a full beard. Trans men are seen as either delusional women or offensively effeminate gnc men, NOT *TRANS* Men. I’m sure going from being perceived as merely a gnc tomboy-type “girl” to identifying as a man or masc and wanting to transition did come with a new level of aggression to any pre-existing transphobia, because that transphobia is rooted in misogyny, and hey, btw that was my exact experience growing up too, wild!

when cis society oppresses a trans woman, they are able to do it on multiple levels at once'.

Right, same with trans men. Those levels are different, but there are still multiple. Examples include:

Heretic for standing against god's will and believing she can become something as sacred and intelligent as a man

Worthless woman failing at her only job (provide children)

Dyke

Unnatural pervert who does not belong in society

The next statement you respond to, you say trans men are oppressed on multiple levels, distinctly different from the way trans women are oppressed. I would argue that really you only provide one example, as biblical misogyny is nearly indistinguishable from secular misogyny; Both camps see women for the same singular purpose, intended by Nature/God, as offspring factories and homemakers. And “unnatural pervert” is a fitting definition for how trans/homophobes perceive Dykes, who are still ultimately women failing at their one intended purpose in life. That’s not multiple intersectional levels of oppression, it’s one called Misogyny. 

You then conveniently cut around my explanation of how trans women Do face multiple intersectional levels of oppression:

“She's a woman failing at her gender, a dyke that needs to be fixed. Or she's an evil and grotesque crossdressing pervert, a rude caricature, a danger to polite society. she will never be doing enough to escape oppression entirely, no matter if she gets every surgery she can and wears makeup every day and passes perfectly, because she lives under a patriarchy, and she's a woman, so she lives in a panopticon, and HAVING to get surgery and wear make-up to be respected IS oppression, especially if the alternative is being hate-crimed.”

'Or she's an evil and grotesque crossdressing pervert, a rude caricature, a danger to polite society'

Genuine question here. Do you... think that trans men are not seen as evil gross perverts and dangerous to children?

Yes. On average, and by far wider social conceptions, women are seen as natural caretakers, inherently incapable of sexual assault or molestation, whereas transwomen are seen as the inherent opposite, accused of fetishizing femininity or co-opting it as a manipulation strategy to get closer to potential victims, accused of using femininity as a shield against allegations of assault despite the witchhunts transwomen are frequently subjected to for any expressions of sexuality. Generally, despite this being a completely misguided notion AGAIN built and perpetuated by the Patriarchy, the “danger” transmen are seen as presenting to children is notions of transgenderism, having been brainwashed into rejecting their assigned gender role and the happiness that supposedly came with it, and less so the threat of molestation or assault that Conservatives fearmonger about and trans women are instead disproportionately accused of. 

You can argue women have had historically less access to alternate modes of dress or the independency to explore gender and transition perhaps, and I would love to see a source if you did, but the reason conservatives grab pitchforks and AK47s at the mention of a Drag Queen Story Time at the local library is because they view transfeminine people as inherent threats and transmasculine people as inherent victims. Cis men also do not view Trans Men as offensive caricatures of masculinity, the way some cis women see Trans Women as offensive caricatures of femininity no matter how genuine or subtle her presentation. Transwomen are vilified, seen as wanting to be women for sexual reasons and wanting to be a woman as a man is a bad thing, whereas transmen might be viewed as transitioning to escape misoginstic treatment, and wanting to be a strong powerful man is not a shameful thing. Seriously, have you or a loved one ever been accused of autoandrophilia? Do men clutch their wallets and fear for their purity in the public restroom when they see you rock out of the stall? How many transmen has LibsofTiktok publicly posted the faces of and gotten fired from their jobs working around children as a result? Genuine questions here.

'IN FACT!! experiencing the byproducts of misogyny in a patriarchy!!!'

Well done genius. Every single form of sex or gendered discrimination in the patriarchy (including transphobia itself!!) is a byproduct of misogyny in a patriarchy. Are we gonna argue transphobia isn't real now?

I can tell you’re getting a little emotional at this point, and that’s okay. We can walk through this rationally together. I brought up an example of supposed “transandrophobia” I had seen someone else posit, that trans men who are rejected or ostracized from queer/women safe/prioritized spaces for being “too masculine” are experiencing transandrophobia. I reject this by pointing out that transfeminine people rejected from those same spaces are being rejected for misogynistic patriarchal norms meant to keep people separated and subjugated, and that TERFS more often than not uphold and reinforce patriarchy rather than rejecting it because they refuse to reject gender norms first. You clearly grasp that much and agree. So, I really don’t get where you get the idea I'm arguing transphobia isn’t real. I’m merely pointing out that phenomena labeled as “transadrophobia” is identical to plain old transphobia and misogyny, and that there is no “androphobia” to be found in the first place.

'you don't say cis gay men experiences "androphobia", bc that's not a thing!'

Yes. Because androphobia is not a form of oppression on its own.

So you do agree! Androphobia is not real. Men cannot be oppressed under a patriarchy. Why are we still here? You claim the definition is an intersection of transphobia and misogyny, which is almost the exact same thing i’m explaining, so why are we still trying to call it transandrophobia. It’s transphobia. It’s misogyny.

-> "Transandrophobia is a term coined to describe the intersection of misogyny and transphobia face by trans men, because it is an intersection."

Except they do not overlap in a distinct flavor of hateful treatment of trans men. Are there any widely known specific slurs with heavy sexual connotation about transmen the same way there are multiple slurs for transwomen? Do people throw them around with the same casual air they talk about "traps" and "sissies" and "femboys"? If a transphobe correctively rapes a transman, is the goal to "correct" him into a more traditionally masculine man, or is it to treat him like a woman, make him feel like a woman, and force him back in the closet? Instead, effeminate cis men are subject to homophobia (regardless of their actual sexual orientation) rooted in misogyny; the disbelief they would align themselves with women, the disgust over the idea of taking a “woman’s” role in sex. Trans men might be trans/homophobically shamed for being effeminate or not passing, or misogynistically oppressed for clashing against gender norms. Transwomen are subject to transmisogyny, shamed for taking a woman’s place and then *again* for failing at being a conventional woman. Transmisogyny is intersectional that way. Why are we still here! 

-> Arguing over etymology is just stupid because language evolves. 

The conversation has not evolved to the point to necessitate language evolving. That’s. My. Whole. Point. By calling it “transandrophobia” we obfuscate the root causes of oppression, we give fuel to genuine Men’s Rights Activists to co-opt our language and let transphobes walk back progress by not standing in solidarity for the most vulnerable in our community and instead arguing that oppression is equal across the board when it explicitly IS NOT and CANNOT BE while we still live under patriarchy. 

-> Shockingly the patriarchy has more layers to it than 'men > women'. Wait till you learn about racialisation of gender, intersex and non-binary people and how sex and culture impact understanding of gender (THE SOCIAL CONSTRUCT, which is subject to cultural nuances). 

I say it sounds like MRA rhetoric because it does. It sounds like a refusal to acknowledge privilege because grouping yourself with the oppressed is less work than standing up for them.

I’m not even sure you knew what your point in this section was. I am a queer nonbinary trans person. Yes, this is an incredibly complex topic, but a patriarchy is genuinely Men>Women as a societal structure. That trickles down to affect sex and culture and popular connotations, of course it does. Your argument then, as you claim to engage with me in good faith about this, is that my understanding of gender dynamics doesn’t have enough nuance? It’s hard not to feel like you’re just parroting buzzwords here, and then not laugh when you accuse me of making assumptions and changing the subject.

I mean, you bring up the racialization of gender, and then cut away my point about misogynoir! Like, c’mon!

“...You don't say a black man experiences "misandrynoir"!! because living in a patriarchy fundamentally means men do not experience oppression based on their gender.” 

I reciprocate the sincere invitation to take everything here point by point, try to glean some new understanding from it, and let me know if there's anything further i can clarify.

I would also advise you to reflect upon who you’re reblogging from, and who reblogs from you. Just in the handful of likes and reblogs your response picked up, there was at least one blatant TERF, and again when I checked out your blog I noticed a few posts from blogs dedicated to circulating hateful rhetoric. It does nothing to strengthen your position as a rational trans rights activist when you’re publicly aligning with the exact group that attracts the most criticism to your stance. If you’re serious about promoting feminism and increasing awareness of transmasc issues to the wider largely-ignorant cis population, they need to be able to grasp the simplest points of how intersectional oppression works and understand the language the trans community uses. Feminism still struggles to illuminate gender inequality and escape the reputation that it’s a movement for female domination over men. Quibbles like this are a waste of time til then.

Hope this has helped! ^-^

hey. when cis society is oppressing a trans man, what he is experiencing is. In Fact. misogyny. i'm sorry i know none of us like to be reminded of our agab, and it hurts whenever people perceive you as the wrong gender. but a cis person hate-criming, assaulting, verbally abusing, etc, a trans man is not doing "transandrophobia" because they do not perceive him as a man.

they perceive him as a woman failing at her gender, as a woman who has been seduced and lied to and manipulated because women are so easily led astray, just like it says in the bible. they perceive him as a woman who has been mutilated. they perceive him as a dyke that needs to be fixed. if they are hate-criming him because they *do* perceive him as a man, because he passes well enough they aren't thinking he could be trans, then they're doing so out of homophobia, perceiving him as a gay man, a pervert, a sissy, a danger to children. OR, they are being transphobic but specifically because they think he might be transfeminine instead. when cis society oppresses a trans woman, they are able to do it on multiple levels at once. She's a woman failing at her gender, a dyke that needs to be fixed. Or she's an evil and grotesque crossdressing pervert, a rude caricature, a danger to polite society. she will never be doing enough to escape oppression entirely, no matter if she gets every surgery she can and wears makeup every day and passes perfectly, because she lives under a patriarchy, and she's a woman, so she lives in a panopticon, and HAVING to get surgery and wear make-up to be respected IS oppression, especially if the alternative is being hate-crimed.

trans women (and trans men who pass) are not experiencing "transandrophobia" when a 'queer women and nbs" event turns them away at the door for being too masculine. they are. IN FACT!! experiencing the byproducts of misogyny in a patriarchy!!! where the terfs and coward cis women running those events and occupying those spaces have been taught (sometimes through experience, sometimes by men, sometimes by women) throughout life that men = stronger and more dangerous than women ALWAYS. That they need to protect themselves at all times and always be vigilant. That men and women can't be friends without sexual tension (and so as queer women the mere existence of what they perceive as a "man" is a threat). That women need a separate sports league because they can't possibly compete with someone who has even a little bit "extra" (an unquantifiable amount actually because there isn't a standard range) testosterone. That women should cook and men should fix cars. i promise you, i promise i promise i promise. it's misogyny. like!!! you don't say cis gay men experiences "androphobia", bc that's not a thing!! you sound like fucking mens rights activists guys please! you don't say a black man experiences "misandrynoir"!! because living in a patriarchy fundamentally means men do not experience oppression based on their gender. its not happening. shut the fuck up. stop walking us back to 2014 can we please take a step forward and stop bitching about this. there are genuine issues in the world and i'm frankly sick of people who should be smarter than that needing to be gently hand-held through this fucking explanation for the millionth time and still stomping their feet.

[yearning-mlm-hours]

Ok so tw discussing transmedicalism (and why it's bad) //

I feel like i probably should say this because I'm so tired of the argument between people who aren't in a good headspace to be arguing with each other, especially since that can prompt nasty things to be said

There is SOME truth to transmedicalism, but a lot of the details have been taken put of context or misinterpreted. You don't need gender dysphoria to be trans. What you DO need is Gender Incongruence, which is not the discomfort relating to your assigned gender, but rather the difference between the way you percieve your gender and what your gender was assigned at birth.

"But wait, mr. yearning mlm hours, isn't that what being trans is?" Yeah! Essentially, if you do not identify 100% with your birth gender at all times, you're some level of trans.

Now back to the transmed narrative. Why do they think you need dysphoria to be trans? Well, back in The Day, many people who had dysphoria would *medically* transition. Doctors noticed this and set it as the standard to recieve medical treatment. Also, many people who thought they didn't have dysphoria noticed feeling better after treatment, and so it was assumed these people didn't realize they had dysphoria in the first place due to denial. Whether or not that is the case is still undetermined, as most of those doctors are now deceased.

"Wait, aren't you dysphoric?" Yeah. I am. However, it didn't make me trans. It's a side affect of being trans. Before I first came out, I used to cry in dressing rooms trying on bras because I thought that my chest was too small or looked wrong, when in reality I just hated having a chest. I misinterpreted my own gender and discomfort because I was not only in denial, but just a kid. After coming out, I thought I didn't have dysphoria. I recognized how much better I felt identifying as another gender, which is where incongruence comes in, but I didn't really know that I would begin to feel discomfort about female puberty. Later, I started to feel worse and worse, still not understanding. It was only til I drew myself with short hair for the first time that I realized I was experiencing dysphoria, a side affect of being trans. My brain didn't recognize me as I was, because in my head I was not a girl, but I looked stereotypically feminine and was percieved as such, so I felt awful.

Now obviously, my experience with gender is not the only experience. Some people know, and have always been masc or femme, or never understand the incongruence until they're much older. Some people will never know.

Now I'm gonna address what is called the "tucute" side. Dysphoria isn't hating your body. I like my body, but it doesn't feel right to me. It's essentially comparable to "I like watching basketball, but I don't like playing it." Also, transmedicalism often stems from a place of "wanting to understand why" someone is trans. For a long time I wanted to know why, and when people offered an explanation, I simply agreed. Now, I've learned that the explanation I was given was not correct, and that there's not enough evidence to back it up, because so few trans individuals have offered to be part in the studies cited.

"Well, why don't a lot of people want to dress like their gender?" A lot of trans people, including myself, are somewhat or totally GNC. I understand that no matter how I dress, my body and voice are going to be seen as a woman, or nb. I also really like fashion, and don't understand why clothes have to be gendered (curse you, adhd that alienated me from social standards) (jk). So anyways, many people feel that expressing themselves gives them a sense of joy that is separate from their gender. Being able to change how you look and look cool in fun colours or fashion is enjoyable, and shouldn't be spit on.

Anyways, td;lr, the only thing that makes you trans is being trans, not dysphoria, and GNC trans ppl are absolutely valid. Also nb ppl are trans, and a lot of transmeds are misinformed rather than purposely hateful, though that doesn't make transmedicalism good.