#this is all from a discussion in a discord server
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*throws these at you*
#twst headcanons#again#this is all from a discussion in a discord server#actually various discussions#the kalim one somehow began a discussion that escalated into American politics#twisted wonderland#Jamil viper#kalim al asim
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Inspired by a conversation that @divorcingjimmatthews and I were having
#very important discussions happen in our little discord server#from epix#fromblr#from 2022#from mgm#i could tag all of these characters but. no <3#i trust that this will find who it needs to find
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I really need some gravity falls friends I think :(
#idk im feeling annoying about talking to non gf friends about it again.#i just said a lot of stuff about stan and his memory loss in multiple discord servers im in today and nobody really. interacted with it in#any of them so i kinda feel stupid for wanting to talk about it ?#any time i feel like this i KNOW its because of how my ex treated me regarding it (can elaborate if asked) and its been hard to...#deal with on my own really.#ive been going through old gf content and such that ive forgotten about in the like? 6 or 7 years i kinda strayed away from it#BECAUSE of that one ex i mentioned#i tend to get on little tangents and talk a LOT about specific gravity falls things for paragraphs accidentally and... nobody who isnt into#the show rn like me isnt gonna like. read that. and respond to it.#i guess i need. conversation? instead of feeling like im talking AT people who just arent as interested as i am.#i think something that really got me down about how much i typed put earlier today is that in one server someone completely changed the#subject about it and the topic got changed without much interaction or discussion at all and in another it was kinda completely ignored#nobody talked over it or anything but nobody has said anything about it at all either. that channel has just kinda been dead and silent#since i stopped sending messages in it. its just#sad? i guess? disheartening.#to be super enthusiastic about something and just not have that enthusiasm met by anyone else. or even like. vaguely hyped up by anyone else
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HI HI HOLLY i saw your tags by the way and it made me so happy to see you reference the yuuyu/yuusha lore and that you noticed that yuusha’s tnbc hairstyle was the elsa hairstyle 😭👋
i dont have irl twst friends as well so im glad to hear i can help fuel that jamil love 😭
ALSO your blogs are SO pretty??? very aesthetic??? i’m going to go through your main and check out your work + your ocs when i have time omg. i’m actually kicking myself having not followed you yet 😤🫶
(also also i got your ask btw!! im having fun working on it rn dhbsjs)
hiiiii!!! ofc i’ve noticed heheh i love the ocs people are coming up with, plus the lore you created around yuuyu/yuusha was super interesting, so naturally that’ll stand out to me ^^
ahsjsh you’re so sweet ㅠㅠ i don’t think you missed out on much, i was knee-deep in a (semi) hiatus for most of the year, so i didn’t actually write all that much ^^; (but there’s this azul thing i’m hoping to finish for halloween 👀)
still i’m so flattered help… 🥺
and ahhhh THANK YOU so much for liking my aesthetics!! 🥺💕 i’ve thought about changing it to a ghost (pokémon) theme bc chandelure is my favourite little guy and halloween is upon us jsjsh (i guess it would be for this blog since i like botw too much to let it go jsjsh)
as for my ocs… carmilla is like the only one i’m thinking about atm (well and this yuusona i haven’t introduced yet but basically already has a feature length film in my head); these two are the reasons i want to learn how to draw, just so i can doodle the sillies jshhs
ooooh i’m glad you’re having fun!! my evil masterplan has worked hehehhe :]
also also i saw the posts you made about posting for multiple fandoms, aka the essence of my online presence, and doooooo it (esp if it’s fandoms i specifically am in, like obey me or hsr jshshs :>)
#❃ ˗ˏˋ➛ righteous heart#❃ ˗ˏˋ➛ sitting by the water with ian#actually not having any irl twst friends and also not a lot of twst moots was the reason i made my discord server#i’m not as active in there as i should i be think but it’s still fun to see everyone discussing events hcs ocs etc#carmilla and [yuusona] is where my mind is at; girlie has her own spotify playlist and all (that’s how you know the brainrot is real)#cheron on the other hand is just chilling vibing hanging out#i was thinking of his design yesterday and i think it changed from how i envisioned him last year so i might have to go back and change it#BUT ANYWAY RAMBLING ASIDE#AHSHSJSHJS YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW HAPPY THIS ASK MADE ME!!!#so happy to find another person of the ‘also also’ variety bc it’s a word i use entirely too often ㅠㅠ#i need to put a cw somewhere that i talk /a lot/ when people ask about specific stuff jshsh#holly shut up challenge: level impossible; chronical yapper here#well i started writing for a reason jshshsh
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Ok hear me out because I'm tempted-
Goddess Earth/flowerboi Ai chat :>
(Idk random also can't escape me >:])
*gaaasp*
I'd love to chat with Flowerboi!
He is always on my mind I love him so much >w<
#answered ask#for context: this is from a discord server#where during brainrot hours we discuss what-ifs and AUs#one of the first was about if Earth got the star from Eclipse who gave it willingly to her#she then becomes a goddess of sorts#and she tries to reform him#it's a rocky journey but it works#he tends to her gardens#maintains the flowers and fruits and such#he also has a butterfly companion named Charlotte#she is feisty and fierce#they are besties#tsams au#sun and moon show au#we all love Flowerboi#which is what we call him for short#we've built a wonderful story for him that is really fun to imagine#oh my this is a lot of tags
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forever annoyed by the inability to have constructive conversations involving media criticism anymore. I feel bonkers because it's like everything immediately dissolves into reactionary, all-or-nothing arguments that leave me baffled and usually uncomfortable
#personal#thinking about the person who joined the book club I'm in then got mad at the queer and/or poc members#because we were reading a book by a poc author that involved queerphobia#and when this person reached the queerphobic part she just could not engage with it at all#which obviously it's fine#you don't have to read those things#but to accuse everyone reading of excusing queerphobia because we were trying to discuss the context of when and where the book was written#despite the fact we had for like weeks been having very nuanced discussions about this author and his work#honestly mostly calling him a misogynist and queerphobe lmao#despite the fact that a woman from the same area the author was from was there discussing her experiences etc#and then the other side of this is like#you're an sjw if you discuss the implications of how poc/disabled/etc characters are treated in fiction or whatever lmaooo#obviously people don't generally say “sjw” but it's basically what they mean let's be honest#thinking about the person who got mad that I had a rule not to send certain content in a discord server#because obviously that meant I was engaging in (insert shipping discourse)#obviously it meant I disapproved and was being an sjw type#but really it was just that someone helping to mod had trauma surrounding this one specific thing#so when the mad person decided to show me who's boss by sending that content anyway they were literally doing nothing to me#but they were hurting someone else#all or nothing you're not allowed to have boundaries because if you have boundaries it's actually commentary on your stance or whatever#so annoying
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I was thinking “haha it’s so weird and silly i got soOOO into this one very specific part/arc/related minor-ish character group of a franchise, i haven’t done that before have i? this is a new weirdness for me isn’t it?”
and then suddenly vividly remembered my inconvenient and untenable and frankly quite extreme obsession with the romulan star empire all throughout middle school, with such force and clarity that i had to put a hand to my face
#i would absolutely have made a Discord For Romulan Likers#that was still a bit different though since a portion of that came from an instinct to subvert#bc i felt like what some of TNG era canon did with Romulans basically being pre programmed to Do Betrayal was silly needed deconstructing#(and at the same time was intrigued by how a society of people like that COULD function if taken at face value)#whereas my hangup on the village arc and Ganja is bc i rly rly rly like the story + characters (also feel Longing (tm) instilled by tragedy#and wanted to talk about them a lot and nearly all english language spaces for MiAbyss were just crammed with the s1/movie parts/characters#and not my Special Sillies#like obviously theres no ‘hey ONLY talk about season two of the show’ rule on the server. that would be unhinged#but i made it because the rest is always getting discussed everywhere else so i hope that focus is ok with everyone and hopefully that’s no#uncouth of me to acknowledge that i personally made it for that specific reason. wait this got off topic. THE ROMULANS…. RIGHT#anyway i remember i was kinda grumpy at how much stuff Klingon Likers had in comparison#you can learn Klingon#you can’t learn Romulan!! (real ones know its called Rihan and not Romulan though)#(the Romulans call themselves the Rihannsu. i believe thi is 100% extracanonical material though)#(ebil did you really get tipsy on a tuesday night and start rambling about Romulans???? yes. yes i did. )#(look i had a difficult appointment today i deserve it)#anyway it’s actually insane that i never read Diane Duane’s series abt them#i didn’t really have internet purchasing power and was restricted to what was at the library and easily available online#i should read those books eventually#i still have a soft spot for them pointy eared maniacs
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A writer friend told me something that broke my heart a little bit today; they're going to quit publishing their fanfic.
My instant thought was that they had been trolled or attacked or that something terrible had happened in their life because this person is so passionate about their writing. It wasn't any of that. Engagement with their works has been going down, as it has for many of us. Comments are like gold dust a lot of the time, and just looking through the historical comment counts on old fics on ao3 demonstrates this trend very clearly. It was not simply the comments dropping off which caused them to decide to stop posting, however.
My friend came across a discord server for their fandom (I should point out here that their fandom interest and mine diverged a couple of years ago, we stay in touch but don't currently read each other's posts because I'm not into their fandom and they would rather gouge their eyes out with a wooden spoon than read anything Star Wars) and specifically to share fic in that fandom. They joined, because we all love a good fic rec, only to discover that their latest multichapter fic, which has almost no comments and very few kudos, is being hotly discussed in this server as one of the best stories ever. Not one of these people has bothered to say this to them on the fic. When they asked, none of participants could see the point in telling the author of the fic they apparently loved so much that they love it.
This discovery has absolutely destroyed my friend's love of sharing fic. They share because they love seeing other people's enjoyment, and fic writers do that through comments and kudos/reblogs/likes because we don't get paid. There is no literary critic writing a blog post/article about how amazing the story is for us to copy and keep/frame. There is no money from royalties. All we have are the words of the people reading our works.
Those people on that server could have taken five minutes of the time they spent gushing about how amazing my friend's story was to other people and used it to tell the one person guaranteed to want to hear that praise how much they loved it. They could have taken a moment to express their opinion to the person who spent hours upon hours plotting, writing, editing, and posting those chapters. Instead, they deprived my friend of thing that keeps them sharing their writing, and in the process have killed their love of it. My friend now feels used and unmotivated.
I won't be sharing a link to their fic, they said I could share their experience but not their identity. I know they plan to post one final chapter. I know they intend to express their hurt at being excluded from the praise for the thing they created, and I know they intend to announce that as a consequence they will not be posting for a long while, if at all.
So please, I beg you, don't hide your love of a story from the writer. It's just about the only thing we have.
#fanfiction#fanfic#ao3 writer#ao3 fanfic#writing is hard#fanfic writing#writer stuff#archive of our own#ao3#this isn’t about me#my stuff still has great interaction from readers#although I would never say no to more#but please please please don't hide your enjoyment from us#they feed the gremlins in our heads which give us the stories
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HELP US STOP CHAT CONTROL!
If you live in the EU, you absolutely need to pay attention to what's to come. What is Chat Control, you may ask? In a (failed) attempt to combat child abuse online the EU made Chat Control, Chat Control will result in getting your private messages and emails to be scanned by artificial intelligence aka AI to search for CSAM pictures or discussion that might have grooming in there. And on top of having your private conversations handed to AI or the police to snoop in, like your family pictures, selfies, or more sensitive pics, like the medical kind, only meant to be seen by your doctors, or the "flirtatious" kind you send to your partner, you either have to ACCEPT to be scanned...or else you will be forbidden from sending pictures, videos, or even links, as said here.
Kids should absolutely be protected online, without question, but the things that Chat Control gets wrong is that this is a blatant violation of privacy, without even considering the fact that AI WILL create tons of false positives, this is not a theory, this is a fact. And for all the false positives that will be detected, all of them will be sent to the police, which will just flood their system with useless junk instead of efficiently putting resources to actual protect kids from predators.
It also does not help that politicians, police officers, soldiers etc will be exempt from Chat Control if it passes. If it's for the sake of protection, shouldn't everyone get the same treatment? Which further prove that Chat Control would NOT keep your data of private life safe. Plus, bad actors will simply stop using messenger apps as soon as they know they're being tracked, using more obscure means, meanwhile innocent people will be punished by using those services On top of this, the EU also plans on reintroducing Data retention called "EU Going Dark". Both Chat Control and EU Going Dark are clear violation of the GDPR, and even if they shouldn't stand a chance in court, its not going to prevent politicians from trying to ram these through as an excuse to mass surveil European citizens, using kids as a shield. Even teenagers sending pictures to each other won't be exempt, which entirely goes against the purpose of protecting kids by retaining their private photos instead. Furthermore, once messaging apps are forced to comply with Chat Control, the president of Signal, a secured messaging app with encryption, have confirmed that they will be forced to leave the EU if this is enforced against them.
If Chat Control also ends up targeting any websites with the option of private messages, you better expect Europe to be geo-blocked by any websites offering such function. I would also like to add that EU citizens were very vocal in the fight against KOSA, an equally bad internet bill from the US-- and it showed! Which is why we heavily need the help of our fellow US peers to fight against Chat Control too, so please, because we all know if it passes, the US government will take a look at this and conclude "Ooh, a way to force mass surveillance on citizens even more than before? don't mind if I do!" It's always a snowball effect.
KEEP IN MIND THE EUROPE COUNCIL WILL LIKELY VOTE ON CHAT CONTROL THIS 19 JUNE OF NEXT WEEK TO SEE IF IT WILL ENTER TRILOGIES OR NOT. Even if it does enter Trilogues, the fight will only be beginning. Absentees may not count as a no, so it is crucial that you contact your MEPs HERE, as well as HERE, and you can also show your support for Edri's campaign against Chat Control HERE.
You can read more on Chat Control here as well, and you can find useful information as to which arguments to use when politely contacting your MEP (calling is better than email) here, and beneath you will find graphics you can use to spread the word!
YOU CAN ALSO JOIN OUR DISCORD SERVER (linked here) TO HELP ORGANIZE AGAINST CHAT CONTROL NON EU PEOPLE ARE MORE THAN WELCOME TO JOIN TOO!
https://discord.gg/FPDJYkUujM
PLEASE REBLOG ! NON EU PEOPLE ARE ENCOURAGED TO REBLOG AS WELL CONTACT YOUTUBERS, CONTENT CREATORS, ANYONE YOU KNOW THAT MAY HELP GET THE WORD OUT ! Let's fight for our Internet and actually keep kids safe online! Because Chat Control and EU Going Dark will only endanger kids.
PLEASE REBLOG! NON EU PEOPLE ARE ENCOURAGED TO REBLOG AS WELL CONTACT YOUTUBERS, CONTENT CREATORS, ANYONE YOU KNOW THAT MAY HELP GET THE WORD OUT !
Let's fight for our Internet and actually keep kids safe online! Because Chat Control and EU Going Dark will only endanger kids.
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I've never really talked on here about how I figured out my gender, and since this whole egg discourse is going on, I feel like I should.
I'm not one of the trans women who figured out their genders at age 4 and became fully confident of it. Up until around 16 I didn't even begin to consider that I may not be a cis guy and it took me up until almost 19 to fully realise I was a trans woman. Before this, at 18, after feeling particularly shitty for weeks (from what I later learned was definitely dysphoria), I attempted suicide.
I only really started to understand myself once I started hanging out with other trans people on discord servers. My perception of transness was the more mainstream-accepted version (at that time) of "I always confidently knew I was a woman basically from birth and I exhibited x, y and z feminine behaviours at all times etc." which I didn't fit in with, so I always thought "well I can't be a trans woman because that's not me". Being around other trans people, and especially having other trans women point out behaviours I had, and tell me "that's also how I thought before I realised I was trans" helped me immensely.
I didn't get any of the rigid online definitions and examples, nor did I get the perfectly sanitised videos from the handful of trans people who made it on youtube. None of that felt like me at the time. I didn't have any point of reference. I only really understood myself once I related to someone who used to be in the same position. If some trans girl didn't call me an egg, I might still be a completely miserable "cis" guy to this day still, or even dead.
I understand that others have had worse experiences when it comes to this, but we must recognise that the problem in these situations is outing or harassment. The porblem is abuse, and as with all things interpersonal, you can always turn it into abuse. As with all things interpersonal, you have to have some amount of tact and caution.
I don't think we should harass anyone into getting their egg cracked (and this happens vastly less often than people here seem to think but it does happen), but also we shouldn't be constantly agnostic about if someone is trans or not, because in the end not everyone is capable of coming to that conclusion by themselves, and by the time you've "let them figure it out" they might've spent several more years being miserable and not knowing why or they might be dead.
It is also very important to point out that this discourse is only really happening because there is a particular bias against trans women. This isn't a discussion of how to approach the subject, or a handful of people talking about their experiences with it, it's a discourse where one side is trying to problematize another aspect of the transfem community. Notice that people are arguing this when it comes to transfems and not cis gay people or even transmascs. Notice that this website always cycles back to attacking some aspect of the transfem community every couple of weeks.
Do you really think these arguments are being made in good faith? Do you really think it's worth adding to the sea of transmisogyny that is this website and most of the world?
As always, this post is meant for people who are genuinely well-meaning. The dipshits who keep jumping on any excuse they can to harass trans women can go fuck themselves.
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‼️ This is very important so please read ‼️
The ex-admin for Dansir, Lapin, and Sk8ter (a penguin) came out on Twitter with her experience as a QSMP admin and it’s very grim. The user is @/Leasagne_ on Twitter.
I’m gonna try my best to translate from French :
1st Tweet : « Imagine having the first multilingual minecraft server in the world and paying your staff 150€/month and threatening to sue them if they complain. »
2nd Tweet: « «You signed an NDA blablabla if you speak we’ll sue you. » Yeah Yeah, sure. They think they can gift me a toy and i’ll forgive them and shut my mouth. They don’t know who they are facing »
3rt Tweet : Talking about the NPC she played « Dansir, Tototte, my version of Cucurucho and Lapin won’t come back. Enough of treating people who give a lot of themselves like trash »
She then tweeted art she made for QSMP that she hasn’t been paid for. This include for exemple a Rose drawing, a Lucy drawing and the Techno fanart from Dia de los muertos event.
4th tweet : « Everyone is burnt out in their entreprise but it’s not a problem bc no one can talk or they risk getting sued. »
She then make a serie of tweets explaining why they got fired : « During a stream, Aypierre leaked my name, thanks dude, they saw that i was talking to him on discord, which is a FORBIDDEN THING. I was then accused of leaking things to him, bc on the screenshot, i was talking about DDOSon the server which is considered sensitive information. There was then an investigation on me, which i said was useless as I didn’t have anything to hide and was ready to answer all their questions. I admitted not following the rules (btw it’s forbidden to have chatrooms BETWEEN ADMINS, that’s why I wasn’t following the rules). We aren’t allowed to talk to streamers out of stream, but everyone does it i was just caught doing it. »
She also added some more stuff
-Saying that they were only TWO french admins (the other being Pomme’s) and OP had to do all the translations of QSMP newspapers, as well as adding articles on french CCs as they had been forgotten.
-Said that Empanada wasn’t supposed to be killed that day, it was an accident.
-Said that Pomme’s death, which was reversed, was forced so that « Baghera would have a tragic reaction »
-Said that the QSMP admin staff are all wonderful people with good dynamics, higher ups are the problem.
-Said that she believes Quackity isn’t aware that this is happening.
-Said that now QSMP ccs are aware that this is happening and want to discuss it with the admins.
I’m on my phone so it’s hard to include screenshots or links of everything so if you’re able to feel free to do it by reblog. I’ll add more things as soon as possible.
https://x.com/leasagne_?s=21&t=fDVoT5qDN_AAqnxYhZF3uQ
#qsmp#qsmp neg#qsmp crit#qsmp dansir#qsmp lapin#qsmp empanada#might as well tag her as she’s mentioned#qsmp pomme
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✨We encourage you to keep an eye on our Official Santae Discord announcements and to follow us on our social media platforms if you would like to be a Beta Tester!✨
✨ Bestowed with the combined blessings of all nine deities, Radiant pets are the chosen champions of the divine pantheon. The enigmatic and alluring radiant pets shine with unparalleled brilliance and majesty, symbolizing the ultimate pinnacle of divine blessing and pet rarity on Santae. Additional opportunities to add these species to your adventuring party will be announced at a later date!✨
Staff Applications are OPEN!!
* Positions are currently open, although at the moment we are currently searching for Moderators with previous experience, or a strong desire to learn and grow with our dynamic staff team!
* Staff are paid in Cash Points, or in the instance of artists, the option of Cash Points or USD$.
* To maintain fairness, please refrain from discussing your application status, as all submissions are reviewed anonymously.
~ CLICK HERE FOR MORE INFO ~
STAY CONNECTED
* In the meantime, be sure to join our Discord server for updates, engaging community discussions and all things Santae!
#santae#neopets#dappervolk#rpg#grundos cafe#virtual pet site#flight rising#pet site#lorwolf#virtualpetsite#marapets
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CUPID’S CORNER — nishimura riki
synopsis. because he’s a little shit, nishimura riki sends a totally embarrassing confession about you to “cupid’s corner”, a twitter account that posts anonymous confessions from decelis academy students. but when that joke confession suddenly makes a bunch of people confess to you on cupid’s corner (for real this time!) riki finds that he’s jealous — and oh… he can’t believe it took him a fake confession to realise that he’s crazily in love with you.
pairing. best friend! riki x fem! reader
genre. smau, fluff, humour, slight angst
warnings. swearing, riki’s a little shit but so is yn😭 rikiyn are dense and just overall silly people in general
status. complete
author’s note. i lied about never having another smau. this is inspired by my friend submitting an embarrassing confession of me to one of those confession accs . i got my revenge tho😍
server link . here's the link to join the discord server. you're welcome to discuss theories with fellow readers ^_^
profiles 1! / profiles 2!
ONE — be my girlfriend TWO — my kyky THREE — get a job! stay away from her! FOUR — gimme chocolate FIVE — BS = bank statement SIX — im so eunchae SEVEN — stupid vball anon EIGHT — deep thoughts in the toilet NINE — hiiiii (manipulatively) TEN — bob, the cat ELEVEN — i keep it 99 cuz i b lying sometimes TWELVE — stupid moral compass THIRTEEN — me when im ran FOURTEEN — ugly emotion FIFTEEN — hyungyeom's adventures in hell SIXTEEN — cried into my suitcase SEVENTEEN — fuck up that plastic packaging EIGHTEEN — toilet emoji NINETEEN — he’s poohing TWENTY — out of all people TWENTY ONE — i don't know when i want!!! TWENTY TWO — niall horan TWENTY THREE — i have a confession TWENTY FOUR — riki fanclub TWENTY FIVE — r u srs TWENTY SIX — may god bless the asteroid TWENTY SEVEN — my #1(0) TWENTY EIGHT — rikiy/n > the world TWENTY NINE — cupid dumb era THIRTY — be my boyfriend
#k labels#kflixnet#enhypennetwork#enhypenwriters#enhypen smau#enhypen imagines#enhypen fluff#enhypen angst#enhypen au#enhypen scenarios#enhypen x reader#riki smau#riki imagines#riki fluff#riki angst#riki au#riki scenarios#riki x reader#ni ki smau#ni ki x reader#ni ki scenarios#ni ki imagines#ni ki fluff#ni ki au#ni ki angst
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🎃🦇🎃🦇🎃🦇🎃🦇🎃🦇🎃🦇🎃🦇🎃🦇
Hey everyone! This October I would very much like to present to you a list of prompts for our very own Erisoltober!!! 🎉 For all that participate and do all 5 prompts there will be a lil *TRICK OR TREAT PRIZE included! WOOOO!!! Everyone is welcome to contribute and put in alittle something from whatever medium suits your tastes. Please make sure to share your work here and tag #erisoltober AND @poxxxum (me) for me to spot so that I may spread the joy these two characters give to me and others!
This is stress free kinda event, so please have fun with it! If you have any questions feel free to drop a message or ask on our very own Erisol Discord where we might discuss ideas and plans throughout the course of the event!
(For server link please ask @nebulous-tundra on their page!)
🎃 PLEASE REBLOG OR JUST TELL UR FRIENDS TO SPREAD THE WORD🎃
((**the prize will be a personal 60 sec erisol drawing made by me thanking you for participating!^^))
#homestuck#erisol#erisoltober#erisoltober2024#eridan ampora#sollux captor#sollux#eridan#inktober#inktober prompts#homestucktober#homestuck inktober#aaaa my first event#this will be fun!#cant wait to see everyones fics or art
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stuff for @spoopdeedoop's starlight strings au that i didn't get around to posting on here
(context for the last one: discord server was discussing how funny it would be if all the doctors just spontaneously appeared in some way that referenced their regeneration story. so ten sleeps for 40 hours straight, they pull eleven out from the ground like a carrot, twelve crashes out of the closet ranting about dinosaurs, thirteen falls through the ceiling, etc)
#id in alt text#my art#dw#doctor who#tenth doctor#eleventh doctor#thirteenth doctor#ninth doctor#twelfth doctor#dr who modern au#starlight strings au#i was hoarding these because i wanted to do some more before i posted them. but well. yeah. so here#long post
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Where to make friends as an adult.
Recently I saw a devastating citation stating that most adults find it hard to make new friends as it feels like there is a lack of community and resources to do so. It takes nearly 50 hours of time together to move from mere acquaintance to casual friend. For more advanced levels of friendship, it can take more than 200 hours before you can consider someone “close”. (source)
So, though I'm not an expert by any means, I thought I'd offer some examples, ideas, and tips on finding and making friends as an adult! Check below the break :>
Ideas on where to find friends:
🆓 Local free (or cheap) events. I went to a presentation that included a free beer in the ticket cost and I had a blast! Most cities have an events calendar you can look at. Soon I'm attending a free event for the transgender community honoring those that came before us. 📖 Library programs. Most libraries that I've seen don't even require a library card, just your email or phone number to sign up for a program! Be it a presentation, class, or event, the library is the place to be!
❕Events of interest. I think about what I'm interested in and what I would like to connect with people about, and I search around to see what I can find. I use sites like Eventbrite to help me search.
💻 Online Communities. For those who can't make it out very often, consider joining online communities by searching for fandoms or topics of interest and see if there is a discord server, bluesky feed, tumblr community, or other communities on socials!
How to make friends:
Consistency. Once you find a place you enjoy going to, an organization you whose events your enjoy attending, or a series of events that takes place KEEP GOING!! Consistency is key, you have to keep interacting with folks to become friends with them.
Transparency. Just be yourself, but that doesn't mean you should be trauma dumping! Sharing personal detail allows us to feel closer to people, but make sure you're not sharing too much information! That can always come later when you're closer friends.
Confidence. You have to believe that you're someone that people want to be friends with. Don't believe it? Well ask your current friends why they are friends with you! You'll not only get a confidence boost, but also hopefully share a touching moment with your existing friends.
Follow up. If you want to be friends with someone you've met, you have to build up the nerve to further connect with them. This means sharing phone numbers or socials.
Start talking. The best way to do this is by asking questions or by giving a non-threatening compliment. Try not to make it all about you, though it is easiest to talk about the one thing we know best (ourselves) it typically won't help you make new friends! Show that you're interested in them, their thoughts and feelings on the topic of the event or a neutral topic such as musicians or food.
Questions. Ask open ended and non-invasive questions and follow through. Examples below!
Invite them out. Once you've established an acquaintance, invite them to hang out! BUT if you're the one inviting them out then you need to make sure you have some plan in mind. This could be going to a trivia night, a local event, or going to a new place together.
Further questions or topics of discussion:
I'm new to this [place or reocurring event] how long have you been coming here? Do you like it so far?
If you could be a crab or a lobster, which would you be and why? (make sure you have an answer ready!)
How long have you known about [place or event theme]? What got you interested in [place or event theme]?
(If at an event with drinks or food) I'm having trouble deciding what to choose, what should I try?
What superpower would you want and why?
What do you do for work? Do you like it? (follow by asking non-invasive questions about their job. This is easier when you have no clue what the job position actually is, lol).
Hey, I really like your style! Where did you get your outfit?/Who or what are your fashion influences?
What questions or topics of discussion do you typically go for when meeting new people?
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