#this is a reoccurring thing that i have zero problem with

[laurenkmyers]

winteam + win putting team exactly where he wants him.

[bamsara]

I'll ask, if it hasn't been already - regarding the tags on the fanfic poll:

What kinda things make you click out/give you the squick? I'm so curious 👀

rubs my hands together: could be a mix of things anywhere between character dynamics, personalities or even how the fic is formated

Btw for people who don't know what squicks are: 'Squicks' are just personal preferences that someone doesn't like. Nothing wrong with em it's just not your vibe. (Exp: Like how all my friends HATE tomatoes but I am tomato eater forever)

anyway long ramble list:

Can't read big blocks of text without breaks very well, and I dislike when characters (esp main characters that are talking in every chapter/scene) have bolded or italicized dialogue. I think it's fine for special reoccurring characters but it genuinely messes up with reading flow for me when it comes to taking in information if used too much

If I'm reading a fic specifically for a monogamous romantic paring, I don't care for the 'past lover interest reappears' trope or one of them currently has one, or the love triangle that results in one of them being like 'oh but i love them both i can't possibly choose!' *cough twilight cough* it just makes the relationship feel disgenuine and icky. zero stars. Any mention of a character's past relationship usually makes me just click out, just personally not here for that

-^^^ to go with this, big fan of the 'misunderstanding where someone thinks there's a love rivelry but the third person never had a chance.' Like to the main pairing there's only eyes for each other and that's all they care about, there's just some third person who's there and causing problems (either because someone in the pairing is jealous of the third person thinking they're gonna steal the other when it's not, or the third person thinks they're a love rival when in reality they're not even thought about) *cough Tyren cough*. I think there's a lotta comedy to have with this. Bonus points if it brings main pairing closer together

When characters have linear character development and recovery. I prefer my characters to realistically relapse and bit a little bit of a hypocrite as they develop from start of story to end. Failing and falling short and again makes the final result much more satisfying when they're healing

When characters use 'therapy speak' or otherwise react perfectly 'acceptable' to stressful situations. Again, I prefer realistic depictions of characters under stress, and work out becoming better under that stress rather than just One Big Thing Happen and suddenly they're never going to react negatively or lash out again because another character told them It Was Bad and To find Better Coping Mechanisms.

Unhappy endings. (Or open ended ones) Sorry for hurt/no comfort lovers but none of my fics will have unhappy endings. I like my stories to have people that go through absolute hell and still come out on the otherside

The ace in me doesn't care for fics where physical attraction is a large part of the ingredients that gets the pairing together. Not saying they can't admire each other when the sunlight hits them or wearing a nice outfit but just not a fan of reading about how 'sexy' a character is to another. Probably why I usually blast all my characters with the aspec beam

That's all I can think of off the top of my head but if someone had a more specific question I might be able to answer

[false-lycanthrope]

I really hate that I even have to say this, but I'm going to because it's a reoccurring theme I keep seeing recently in therian/otherkin tags.

Keep your misanthropy out of the therian/otherkin community. It is not fucking welcome here.

It is insanely frustrating to see us going backwards like this! Not only that humans are not inherently evil by nature!

I'm so tired of constantly having to fish out misanthropes in my feed because you have such an insecurity with your own identity that you project that hatred into innocent people- I mean it's gotten to the point I've had to filter the tags entirely!

It is not fair and not true at all to call humans an evil race or species. If you simply just LOOK you will find kind and loving people out there, you just have to give kindness first.

I get it. People are mean. But you must also understand that meaness is not within their nature, hatred and disrespect are things that are taught by the generation before them or the others around them, it is not something they were just born with.

There is absolutely zero reason that humans as an ENTIRE species should be hated. Ever. Period point blank. Even those who identify as nonhuman, are still outwardly human, and at the end of the day you could be very well hurting your own community with your hatred! Even if humans are rude and mean to you, returning the favor is not how we will solve the problem. We must educate those who are willing to listen and ignore those who choose to hate us for existing. We must be the ones to create the peace that we all desperately fight for.

That is all I have to say. I apologize if this seems like a stream of consciousness, but this is a topic that has been bothering me as of late. Just wanted to get it off my chest.

I love and adore this community with my heart and soul but sometimes it can become upsetting to see some of us cresting more problems that should not have to be something we fight over. All I want is for us to live in peace without divide.

[furiousgoldfish]

I have this reoccurring problem where I feel like I've found a friend in someone, and then some time later, this person does something to hurt me, and rather than apologizing, they snap at me, act like I'm awful and a nuisance to them, and generally get very angry with me. First it makes me feel guilty, and I go over everything I did to see how I deserved this, but then I realize I didn't do anything, they just hurt me and snapped at me, made me feel like it's my fault. And then I get scared that this person could do that, because I can't even imagine doing that to anyone, it's so deeply unethical and shitty, but people do it like it's their second nature. Once I realize that this person scares me, I know I have to get distance and move away from the friendship if I don't want to live a very anxious and triggering life, so I do that. And thus I have no friends anymore.

Now for me, this occurred easily over 30 or 40 times with different people, to the point where I've started to wonder if I maybe draw this behaviour out of them. Because I will usually pick people who I believe would never do that, who seem to be kind, understanding, gentle, funny, easy going, I go for that almost every time, and still they snap at me. I'm wondering if it's because everyone in their mind thinks there's one person somewhere they're allowed to snap at, and since I'm very mild tempered, easy going and understanding, it feels to them like snapping at me couldn’t possibly have any consequences?  Again, I don't understand this, I would rather never snap at any person in my life.

My problem is that sometimes, I end up very bonded to these people, and I start building hope that maybe I could be normal, have friends, function in society, just because it feels for a bit like I'm accepted, I'm allowed to socialize and chat and joke around and tell things to someone, and this means the world to me. I've lived in an environment where I was not allowed any of that. So when these specific people snap at me, my hopes crumble to the ground, and I'm back into the place where I don't feel like I'm a person anymore. Even worse, I get triggered back into my childhood, where my parents screamed at me telling me how disgusting I am, how nobody will ever want anything to do with me, and how I'm the worst thing to ever exist on the planet. That's how I end up feeling when anyone turns against me, or abandons me. I keep it to myself, because I don't want the triggers affecting the friendship. But they affect me deeply.

That feeling of someone I care about finding me disgusting and awful and poisonous gives me so much pain I want to curl up and disappear. I want to not exist anymore. I would rather be alone forever than experience more of that. And that's exactly what I do; I curl up in my own little corner and don't socialize out of terror that more of this will happen, because it does happen so often and I still never see it coming.

I know on some deeply logical level, that people are snapping at me because it's easier for them to do that than to face that they've done something wrong, that they've hurt our friendships and acted badly towards me; they need it to be my fault so they'd feel better about themselves. Taking it out on me is just an easy route because I have zero vindication in me and probably won't ever snap back or get angry in return; I'll just withdraw. I'm always too worried I've genuinely done something wrong when it happens, I'll apologize a thousand times, I'll spend a while trying to figure out what's the truth, and then before I even think about getting angry, I'll be swallowed by pain and sorrow that this happened to me again.

Has anyone found any ways to have people not snap at you when they hurt you? What kind of change in attitude would achieve this? Do I just have bad friend-picking skills? Is this just a normal part of life that other people can handle because being snapped on doesn't make them suicidal? Is it considered normal that your friend will sometimes snap at you when they hurt you? Is it not a glaring red flag? In some cases people will not only snap but also gaslight me about what happened, and I know gaslighting is way over the line. Has this been happening to others? Please give me any opinions or experiences of this, especially if you found a way to deal with it.

[mdhwrites]

The Owl Curse: Or How Eda Stopped Fearing the Curse and Learned to Love the Pet It Totally Always Was.

Sometimes my Discord can trigger me to want to write something. After rambling some base thoughts, someone pretty much summed up what this blog is going to say in the best way:

Eda's Curse in S1: Bit like lycanthropy, drains bearer's magic, functions well Eda's Curse in S2: "Hey guys, remember Naruto and Kurama? That was interesting."

Which is just SUCH a perfect way to describe the difference in how the curse is treated but I want to go a step further. Let’s talk about just how bat shit crazy this curse is from a narrative perspective and how many retcons Knock Knock Knocking introduces that make ZERO sense. Before I get into this though: This all effectively nitpicking. It’s not even “Oh, all these nitpicks become a genuine problem.” No, nothing like that. The Owl Beast is very effectively used emotionally and narratively and its only real problems are in lack of exploration/use of Harpy Eda and the stupidity of the plan against the Day of Unity and that’s more a plot problem than it is specifically the curse’s. So first: What is the curse shown to us in Season 1? Well, it’s actually kept pretty consistent and does a bit of back fill for why the strongest witch in the Isles doesn’t exactly do all that much magic in the first couple episodes. It seems directly tied to your magic supply and emotions, which in TOH are one and the same regardless of jokes like magic ‘coming from the heart’. If your emotions go too high or your magic goes too low, you turn into the beast. Worse yet, it chips away at your maximum magic until eventually you are always at the minimum threshold and will permanently become the beast. (Also, yes, you could claim it as a ripoff of All Might but All Might is a REALLY good idea for a mentor figure so taking from him is not exactly a bad thing.) This also frankly explains what the elixirs do. While they can’t fix the maximum mana issue, they can be a temporary reserve of mana that satiates the curse, This allows the witch to have more tolerance on both magic and emotions that might not otherwise be available, though they won’t stop a panic attack or excessive magic use from causing a transformation, at which point the mana cap is cut even harder. It’s frankly a pretty good curse and in S1 had a lot of interesting possibilities and implications. From disability allegories to possible worldbuilding explanations for why you became any sort of beast, to even the idea of soul animals seeing as both Eda’s palisman and beastial form take elements from owls. The one thing it doesn’t feel though is alive or sentient. It is feral and seemingly designed to specifically make a powerful witch into a mindless monster. To turn the intelligence and magic required to be a powerful spellcaster in most settings into a creature of pure instinct and brute force. Anytime there is any intelligence within the creature, it is explicitly stated that that is due to Eda. And a final note on the S1 elements: We do see Eda’s nightmares. She has reoccurring, lucid nightmares where she sees Lilith but shrouded in darkness. Her actions are of aggression and demands which is very fitting for Eda. This is her way of responding to something that annoys her. Something she wants answers to. Then we get the finale and Lilith takes half of Eda’s curse. Because the final stage of the curse takes ALL of your magic away though, literally any spellcasting power is taken by the curse. A possible stretch but one that works, especially since now the curse itself is halved and its floor for their magic is effectively no longer existent. It’s something that will get them without medication and in highly emotional moments but now that they have no magic, how it functions in terms of the magic they have in them is questionable. But it works well for a finale and a theoretical resolution to the curse. Except... It’s not. I’m actually going to skip Affearances. We’ll come back to it, don’t worry, but we actually first need to discuss the creation of Harpy Eda first. After all, if it’s simply a normal curse, or even mental illness because in S1 it works well enough as a disability allegory (including in Affearances frankly) the Lilith being able to gain it as well makes sense. Knock Knock Knocking makes it a literal owl beast though. It can be reasoned with, make deals and while it looks big and scary, a minor act of aggression can have you realize in your dreamscape that it’s actually tiny and pathetic. It’s just a little guy who got trapped inside you with the power of the curse. And this fucks EVERYTHING up. If aggression can have you meet with its tiny self, because Eda only shows it kindness once it’s small and effectively a baby, then why hasn’t she met the owl baby before? We literally saw that be her reaction to the Lilith dream. Also, that entire sequence is kind of awkward because Eda goes from being ready to throw hands and beat the shit out of it to “No... No. This isn’t your fault. This can be a team effort,” effectively in the span of a screen wipe. But also how about the fact that it can be reasoned with at all? Eclipse Lake straight up shows that it can communicate with its host. That it can make deals and that Eda can even understand it. Why hasn’t this ever come into play before? If it’s an active entity instead of a passive force, why does Eda have to still take the potions instead of just changing her terms with the owl baby? It didn’t seem to actually hate her at the mental beach and that immediately created Harpy Eda once Eda was willing to give it some head pats. The fact that the full Owl Beast form exists at all post Harpy Eda makes no sense. In the finale, she warns the Collector that she won’t be able to control herself before going beast form... But why? That’s not Eda. That’s the Owl Beast. And what the fuck does the Owl Beast about Luz? Instead, it should have been a true fusion of her and the beast. Put some of Eda’s red in its fur or REALLY go monstrous on Harpy Eda’s form since it’s not even as monstrous as most werewolf forms. It’s too sleek to be that frankly. But Eda and the Owl Beast are two different beings. They are not one like they were in S1 where if a fully feral Eda had protected Luz, it actually would have made sense because of the found family aspect. It’s a momma bear protecting her cub or the like. But the owl beast has no relationship to anyone in Eda’s life. It only saves Eda’s life because of the promise of food in Eclipse Lake. And all of this brings up an additional question: WHAT THE FUCK DID LILITH SPLIT!? The Owl Beast has its full form with Eda and since it is the swapping of yourself with the literal creature inside of you, not the figurative one anymore, you can’t just cut that in half. Eda’s beastial isn’t diminished after all. It comes out in full force. Why isn’t it still consuming Eda at full speed then if it’s still entirely inside Eda instead of just being a curse? Or for that matter: Why is Lilith’s beast form different? It’s a literal creature now. People can want it like the possible archivist we see in that dream which... Not gonna touch on it. The point is that Lilith just has a new creature in her that isn’t the same owl beast. When it’s just a curse that is going to have slight variations based on the host’s magic and personality, that made sense. As literal, sentient creature you can reason, NOT SO MUCH! And all of this is without getting into the fact that the plot HINGES eventually on the curse... Still being a curse. Still acting the same way it did in S1 where it just devours magic. It’s why her bard magic now destroys everything it touches. It’s where the BRILLIANT moment of “Let’s counter this spell that kills people by draining of them with their magic with a curse that turns people into monsters, effectively killing them, BY DRAINING THEIR MAGIC” comes from. It’s not good, but it is CRUCIAL to the plot that it can still work like this when we don’t even know why this beast consumes magic at all. We know it likes eating voles. If Eda caught a few voles once a week, would she need to stop taking the potions? So with all that said, with all the questions... Why don’t I condemn this like I do a lot of other half baked elements of TOH? Well... Because it actually has payoff that’s relative to the necessary suspension of disbelief. It’s a curse and it’s magic. So long as it is a detriment to the user, it can do a lot of whatever you want it to. And for S1, its arc with Eda and Lilith is powerful. It’s a lot of what makes the last two episodes of S1 as effective as they are and kind of why Affearances being the last time the two take each other seriously (and not even really that. Eda doesn’t really have a relationship with Lilith after S1 and that just sucks and plays into the utter wasting of Lilith’s character) is such a tragedy. There’s still more there to do but it’s just kind of thrown off, but the double beast battle is GREAT and Lilith’s beast form is PHENOMENAL. Even Knock Knock Knocking and all of its retcons to one big point: Eda coming to terms with the curse. Because we as an audience know how long she’s struggled with it, how much it has hurt her, her coming to find peace with it is powerful and evocative. It’s part of why I REALLY wish Eda had just mastered there and then. They never do anything with it after all and pulling back and being like “Actually, she still has little control over it and needs the elixirs,” kind of cheapens the moment. It’s in line with TOH always not allowing the climax of an episode to be fully impactful (Reaching Out with Amity and Alador, Understanding Willow with Amity and Willow, Eclipse Lake with Amity and Hunter, though that one actually works). Which, fine, but you have to have a point to an anti-climax like that and TOH doesn’t ever plan for those. It’s just another way that the show can say it’s not as twee as other kids’ media, or media in general, when in reality it’s just wasting time. Which frankly, trying to say it isn’t a problem, especially with how the plot handles it with the Day of Unity and all the ways it makes no sense, short term or long term... Yeah. It’s just bad. But it’s indicative of a deep rot at the core of the show that’s constantly eating at it so that its highs can’t ever be as they once were and their options for how to actually fix their issues become less and less. Almost like a certain curse I know. ======== I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead, If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

And finally a Twitter you can follow too!

[residentdormouse]

Reiterating those Rogue ‘R’ Words

I will reluctantly but respectfully relinquish the reins on the ‘r’ alliteration and renounce any reclaim, regardless of ‘Resident’ reoccuring in my repertoire. In retrospect, your ratio of resounding ‘r’ rhythms ring more readily than my own. Remarkably, even with more reserves running rampant, I’m rubbish at rounding up the required rolling resonance. Maybe I should rethink my rapport with the reverberation before rescinding my right and reaping any resulting repercussions, but really? Any further redundant repetition on my part would be rudimentary at best.

(I’ll give you the “r”s @mrsmungus , not sure I can find any good alliteration using them in mine; I just like saying ‘Fuck off, Flagg’😂)

My Words: Rather, Rest, Reveal, Road, River

Your Words: Support, Scared, Sincere, Star, Safe

If you feel inclined to join, don’t hesitate to ‘@’ me! -OPEN TAG-

Rather

(I thought I used this more than I did. Weird. Ah well, a lot of them are very spoiler-ish, so this is the least of the bunch I think? TW referenced drug use in case that’s an issue.)

“Both of us. Attachments only cause problems.”

“You really are full of shit, you know that? Problems? Pretty sure the way you're living, causing problems is exactly what you're doing right now. Fucking people you consider desposable while doing coke in the back of clubs. You’re saying attachments are more problematic than that?! That makes zero–”

“Because people leave, Harold! They die!”

And there its was, the raw nerve that needed the walls, that required her to wear a mask. Running from a past that would never leave her.

“So you’d rather not even bother, then? Hm. I guess, you just didn’t seem like the type.”

Everything stopped. Her movements, expressions, breath. She was frozen until the words were fully actualized.

“What did you say…”

“Being afraid, playing it safe. Hiding away. Never would have guessed that was the real you, Max.”

The rise and fall of her chest was staggered, and he could tell she was doing her best to control herself. After a few moments, she let out her short but articulated reply.

“Fuck. You. Harold.”

Rest

"Mother Abagail said that we need to have faith. I'm not sure what's beyond here. God. An afterlife. Heaven. Hell. I don't have much faith in all that. But I have faith in you. If this is going to be successful, you'll need to be ready for him."

He put a hand on her cheek, and her shoulders slumped down, head leaning forward to rest against his. A brief moment passed before he urged her to look back at him. Still wet, her eyes shimmered, but held anything further at bay.

“So what do you say, Giggles? Give this another shot?”

She nodded her reply, took a deep breath, and adjusted herself into a comfortable position. She let her eyes close and let her mind focus solely on his words in the moment.

Reveal

(I can only use one sentence because both before and after are spoiler heavy, but its a reference to a canon joke, and it made me laugh when I read it.)

Teddy fired a couple shots, finally revealing the gun he had yet to shoot his dick off with.

Road

(Road and rest in one go - double whammy.)

“Ah, c'mon, nobody saw that coming… Come here,” he held out his hand to her, and she pushed the blanket to the side to take it. In a quick movement, she was pulled up and wrapped in a hug. Her head rested on his shoulder, and she couldn’t argue; this warmth was prefered to that of the blanket. As she continued to regulate her breathing, he continued with his thought. “You can’t just stop all the bad things from happening. Bad things happen to good people, for no good reason, all the time. You can only try to help, and I think you are doing that more than you’re giving yourself credit for. So no, it's not for nothing. Who knows how much worse it would be right now if you didn’t try. No sense going down that road.”

The speech gave her thought; who knows, really. But somehow she couldn’t shake the feeling that this was how it was meant to be, that she was fighting a losing battle.

“It's what he said… I’m afraid of who I was, failing at who I am, and I’m not able to help anybody…just wasting energy on dead men.”

He pulled back slightly, holding her by the shoulders, looking directly in her eyes, searching her face.

“You’re letting him get to you is what you’re doing. Don’t give him that.” He gave her a kiss to the forehead, and she leaned into him again. “Let's get some rest though, this is going to be top of the agenda for tomorrow's meeting.”

“So much for enjoying the win tonight…”

River

(Only two instances of River between both stories. This ones in reference to the song ‘The Humbling River’, which I definitely listened to more than I should have while writing this.)

"You sure about that? You think I don't know your type? Haven't gone rounds with a few tough guys that thought they were some kind of hot shit? Rough exterior, but all raw nerves underneath."

"Lot of assumptions you're making."

"You want to tell me I'm wrong?"

Her eyebrow arched to further advance the question, but there was no response from him. "Nobody here's going to hold you to your past beliefs or practices. Past mistakes. We all have our demons, blood on our hands. Some more than others. As long as you're making an honest effort to change, want to change... Well, what you were back then, it isn't the only path forward, and you might be surprised what you’ll find on others."

"Hmm, again with the mission statements. You all pitch it alot…"

"Not really. Only have to pull it out for the stubborn assholes who think they can do everything themselves.” This time she wasn’t waiting around for a response; he heard it or he didn’t. It was, however, a calculated strike, and she was rarely wrong about these things. She breezed past him into the kitchen to pull the curtains. “Never gonna make it over the river that way. Alone. You need help, and you have an opportunity here. One I'm sure you're not getting anywhere else."

Lack of an immediate answer told her she hit a spot.

[mardybum]

I keep wondering if Vulcans might be so "upset" with humans continuing to emote (additionally to being reminded of their difficult past) because they see that humanity, after bringing themselves to the verge of the very same cliff they stood on, made the turn for the right course without purging themselves of emotions. They might not be jealous or envy of humans in the standard sense of the word, but (maybe even unconsciously?) they are aware that the path they had chosen requires constant attention and carefull upkeep to maintain the emotionless status quo, whereas humans, who are faring generally on a similar level, can have what they have with very little work.

Sort of like that kid in your class, that was being a court jester and having daily behavioral issues, until one day something momentous happened in their life and they've started studying, didn't refuse your help with homework and before you know it, their grades are almost as good as yours, but you study everyday after school for hours and they're still getting a plenty of free time and, well, maybe occasional trip to the principal, but they're clearly enjoying their new life. Wouldn't that rise your hackles?

If this suspicion would be correct, I can see other issues pilling up on that. First, if you are a Vulcan with a low IDIC mentality, you dive further into Surak's teaching, trying to supress and box whatever feelings this situation may awake in you. Though, meditating them away might be a reoccurring problem because there's no actionable way out of this situation (why in a moment). On the other hand, if you are a Vulcan with moderate to high IDIC mentality, you have to be aware that a) you are the only (known, very well) humanoid species that decided to continuously go against your natural reactions to such a degree and b) Surak couldn't be the Smartest Philosopher of All Times™️ and if your species wouldn't clung to his words like a lifeline for the couple thousand(s?) years, there might have come someone along the way with more mild, elastic teachings who would be able to gain traction. But even if they did, they weren't heard and accepted by enough people to change the society's mindset.

This brings us to the second point - the probability that your conservative and used-to-your-own-ways species will admit - to themselves and others - that the system they operate in might not be the ideal, most efficient one, is so easily rounded up to zero. Vulcans made sure to place into their societal norms and rules enough safekeeping mechanisms that even setting things in motion on a species level is close to impossible. Thus, why anyone rocking the boat - say by entering an interspecies relationship or entering non-Vulcan cultural or organizational circles - is being met with this old, supremacist mindset so quickly.

It's hard to live by IDIC when your people want to see none of it on your own planet.

makes me a little sad when star trek ignores IDIC. like. vulcans are logical. that is true. But 'logical', for vulcans, does not amount to 'without compassion,' and it definitely doesn't amount to 'racial superiority.' Belief in 'infinite diversity in infinite combinations' should NOT result in the weird racist/speciest stuff we're getting in some of the newer treks. It does make sense that some vulcans are discriminatory. They're still flawed. But that should not be common or expected, like it seems to be in SNW. If it is, then it's a race of hypocrites, which. doesn't seem very true to Star Trek's message.

I think TOS Spock does a pretty good job of embodying this. Not always, it was the 60s, after all, but mostly. He was often trying to find non-violent routes, and get by without killing - even if they were in danger or had already been attacked. (See: the mugato, and the horta (until Kirk was the one in danger, lmao. t'hy'la > IDIC), the Gorn ship). Kirk, in his eulogy, calls him the most human soul he's ever known, and I've always read that as Kirk calling out Spock's overwhelming compassion.

It's just so much more interesting when Vulcans get to be radically compassionate. I want them to believe that everything and everyone has value. I want them to respect all ways of being. I want them to find ways for even very non-humanoid aliens to exist unfettered in society. I want them to see hybrids and think that it's amazing. Also, like, disability rep. I want Vulcans to have The Most Accessible Planet and available resources because they want everyone to feel accepted and valued. It makes for better characters and more interesting stories.

[anthonysstupiddailyblog]

Anthony’s Stupid Daily Blog (414): Fri 5th May 2023

I was so happy riding my bike to work this morning. After almost an entire month of it being broken and me being forced to get buses and taxis (mostly taxis...I hate the bus) has been absolute Hell and has probably cost me a small fortune. Hopefully the fucking bike will be able to go longer than three months without breaking down on me or some dickhead trying to hotwire it again. Today felt long as fuck but tomorrow I only have to go in for two hours in the morning because we've all been given 8 hours worth of holidays so that we can stay off to watch the King’s coronation...I mean I'm not going to actually watch it but I'm grateful for the day off.

Today was the start of my brand new diet / exercise programme (In the ten years since I started this blog I thing I've uttered this phrase so many times it's become like an unofficial catchphrase of mine. I've probably said it more times than Bruce Forsythe said "Nice to See you to see you nice" and Penta says "Zero Miedo" combined). This time around I'm going to attempt to go for a 30 minute run every day after work for a whole month. On days where running is impossible due to bad weather then I have to do 1000 weight lifts / stomach crunches instead. On days where I'm off work I'm going to try and go for two runs: a 30 minute one in the morning and an hour long one in the evening. Diet wise I'm going to take Bivita breakfast biscuits with me to work and have one every hour so that I can constantly stuff my face throughout the day but at least it will be on something healthy. I will also drink water throughout the day and treat myself to either juice or a cup of tea with honey when I get back. These seem like extreme dietary measures to take but like I say it will hopefully only be for a month before I'm down to 12 stone. In order to make things easier and to track my progress I've downloaded the Lose It app so that I can journal every item of food of eat and every bit of exercise I do. I've also drawn a calendar on a piece of paper and for every day I stick to the plan I'll cross off. The hope is that if I can get a decent amount of days crossed off it will motivate me to finish the thing as I won't want to give up when I know I'm so close to the end. Everything seems easier when you try and turn it into a game…except working in a call centre. Literally 5 minutes in to my first run of this challenge my right calf muscle started to hurt like a bitch. It genuinely felt like someone had stabbed it at the top and then slashed down the rest of the muscle. I was beyond pissed off because I thought I was going to have to cancel this newest regime five minutes after starting it but I did some stretching and shaking and eventually managed to push on and finish the run. I don't now what the fuck happened but I'm glad I managed to overcome it and I hope to fuck it doesn't become a reoccurring problem over the next month.

[7-ratsinatrenchcoat]

Melizabeth headcannons + a sprinkle of Tristan

When Elizabeth gets in her head about not being combat-oriented like the rest of the team, Meliodas gets the two of them alone and talks to her about everything he wants to do with her. (Usually, he's just picking things he and Elizabeth have done and loved in past lives. It's bittersweet, but it works.)

Meliodas has been asked who his favorite Elizabeth incarnation was. He says he doesn't have one, and he doesn't, but if you ask him in private it was Elizabeth Liones that made him fall in love with her as hard as he fell the first time.

Elizabeth thought about proposing after the first outbreak of the Holy War, but decided against it. If she had asked, Meliodas would have said yes and made a huge deal about it.

Meliodas cried the first time he held Tristan. And the second time. It took a solid couple months, actually. He still tears up sometimes when he hugs his son (!!!!his son!!!!!!)

Both of them were really anxious about becoming parents, but especially Meliodas, since he has zero positive reference points. He ends up being a huge pushover when it comes to Tristan, but doesn't care at all. If it's that serious, Elizabeth will say no. It's better than the alternative.

Elizabeth was so indecisive with her bridesmaids. so indecisive. She ended up asking both of her sisters to be maids of honor, and asked Gelda. (She didn't want the responsibility, but was very touched that Elizabeth thought of her.)

Meliodas was a wreck before the wedding. Zeldris managed to do anxiety control and kept him in one place until Elizabeth walked down the aisle, at which point Meliodas promptly started crying.

Meliodas has issues with compulsively lying to Elizabeth, but he hated that he did it so much he kicked the habit in a matter of weeks. Elizabeth is very proud of him for that and many other reasons.

Elizabeth has reoccurring nightmares about Meliodas in assault mode, telling her to hit him. Meliodas forgave her for it almost immediately, but she still thinks she could have found a better way.

Elizabeth originally wanted a small ceremony with just family and close friends, but wanted Meliodas to have whatever he wanted for the wedding more, and he wanted a big ceremony. She's glad they went through with his vision.

Meliodas has reoccurring nightmares that they were wrong about breaking the curse, and he'll still be immortal while Elizabeth and Tristan grow old without him.

Elizabeth is bisexual. Her first crush was Nerobasta when they were fledgelings, before she met Meliodas. I will die on this hill.

Meliodas' favorite sound is Elizabeth purring. Yes, she purrs. It's much quieter than him, but he can hear it when she falls asleep on him, which she does a lot.

You think Meliodas has a problem with giving Elizabeth whatever she wants? It's even worse the other way around.

Elizabeth is a huge sucker for Meliodas' puppy eyes. He knows and takes adventage of this all the time.

[showtoonzfan]

I’m not trying to be rude(trust me, I agree with a lot of your opinions on the show) but like..Millie is allowed to be one note and reoccurring. For example, Amity Blight from The Owl House is a very one note character whom has her main traits be “Luz” and “perfection”. She’s very bland but it’s not a criticism, characters are made to fill the roles they play and both Amity and Millie just fit the romantic partner with some extra traits(although, admittedly Millie could fit the “good wife” role better.)

I see what you mean, however Amity is different from Millie. Amity was introduced to be this one note character from the start because her purpose was to change eventually thanks to Luz, as well as set up their future romantic relationship. She was the mean girl that needed to be put in her place, because she was driven so hard to be the one to succeed (foreshadowing her future backstory with her parents on how she was pressured to be perfect). Honestly to sum this up, Amity was clearly introduced as one note because the writers clearly did that on purpose so they can build up her character for the story. Helluva Boss and The Owl House are….completely different shows in many ways. More importantly the Owl House is story driven, so that’s why Amity needed to be one note so they can progress her later. Helluva Boss on the other hand kinda has no excuse. The show introduced itself as a comedy about demon assassins, a show kinda like The Office where these characters just bounce off of one another. Of course until they wanted to make the show story driven and character driven at the same time, becoming a deep show as well. Millie is introduced as Moxxie’s wife, a badass girl yet having a sweet side, and…..that’s it. The show had time to develop characters like Moxxie, Blitz, and Stolas, but Millie is one of the 4 main characters and yet she has zero development. Part of the problem is that this show…let’s be honest, is now mainly centered around Stolitz, when Stolas at the start wasn’t even supposed to be a main character. Millie is literally part of this main cast, and yet she’s just the badass happy wife and that’s it. And the thing is…once again they HAD the chance to layer her, they could have done so in episode 5 because they literally set up how they’re going to her home town and meeting her parents, yet the writers don’t do that. They could have also layered her in episode 6, as they had set up how she has a prejudice against Hellhounds, and since Loona is SUPPOSED to be another main character, they could have bounced off of one another and worked together to save Blitz and Moxxie….yet they didn’t do that either. When I say I want Millie to have development, I’m not begging for like…something big to happen to her, just give us SOMETHING, show us her other sides, more interests, hobbies outside of Moxxie. She just feels like a character on the back burner right now, someone stuffed to the corner like Loona, while Viv keeps on writing Moxxie, Blitz, and Stolas.

[thebibliosphere]

Looking it up and looking at the problems I have with walking: it’s likely the reason I’m constantly rolling my ankles because there is zero joint stability when combined with my EDS. It’s why the exercises I’ve been prescribed aren’t sticking because there is something structurally wrong with the joint that exercise does not help. At the very least, it looks like they need to be splinted to prevent continous injury.

It could also be the reason I’m prone to reoccurring Achilles tendinitis, which is the current thing that made me go to the doctor because it got so bad I was unable to walk without a cane for eight weeks. And even with the cane I could barely stand.

Basically, everything I complained about in the appointment and was told, “oh, you need to do more stretches.”

Walking has hurt my whole life, and I even complained in the appointment, “it feels like my ankle bones are constantly grinding and in the wrong place” and the doctor specifically told me there was nothing wrong with my ankles, just my Achilles tendinitis.

Not once did she mention the bone deformity stated explicitly in the notes, or that it requires surgery, something else she wrote down.

And I’m honestly disappointed because she was otherwise nice and outright dismissed her assistant from the room and apologized when the assistant suggested (insisted, really) that my “significant weight gain” since 2020* was likely the cause of my pain.

It's just... Like at least mention it to me? Put it on the notes I am given as I walk out the door? Don't leave it as a third secret thing for me to find in the electronic notes months later.

I could have been doing a different type of PT this whole time and not reinjuring myself every few weeks.

-

* If you are new here, I gained a lot of healthy weight after almost starving to death in 2018-2019 from complications due to an undiagnosed genetic disorder. (3, actually, but who’s counting?)

I am now technically overweight for my BMI but none of my doctor’s give a shit because it means I’m well enough to retain weight and gain muscle again and they’re all ecstatic over it.

So I hurt my ankle last October, and it's still not quite right. Anyway, filling in an insurance form, and I had to go back and look at the notes to see the date of the appointment. By reading the additional notes that weren't on my printout, I just found out that both of my ankles are deformed and require surgery to fix. It says right there in the notes, "likely cause of substantial pain."

At no point was this mentioned to me during the appointment. What the frick.

[kurokoros]

Nancy’s side-quest in S2 about taking down the lab actually just... should not have worked at all, like you’re trying to tell me this is a high security government lab who, in S1 alone, murdered Benny Hammond for simply learning El existed, managed to break into the Byers home completely undetected, and created a convincing enough fake corpse that Hopper couldn’t immediately tell it was fake and you mean to tell me not one person thought to search Nancy’s purse???

Nancy and Jonathan absolutely would have been searched for weapons. her bag would have been dumped out. they would have been detained by the lab and possibly faced with legal action for attempting to break an NDA. them getting a confession on tape simply does not work. it doesn’t make Nancy look clever like the show wants you to think she is, it just makes the people working at the lab seem painfully incompetent at their jobs

(not to mention the lab probably just would have made a fake body for Barb, too. and Nancy’s crusade is only about Barb, not about the other residents of Hawkins who were killed by the Demogorgon, or Benny, who was the only one directly killed by the lab, but whatever I guess)

bit of a tangent, but the characters in ST diving headfirst into things with zero plan and having things work out because the plot says it has to is a reoccurring thing that pokes so many holes in the story it isn’t even funny. I don’t want to think about S3 because the writing pisses me off so much and I basically scrub the plot from my brain immediately after I finish rewatching it because the entire premise just... fundamentally does not work (it’s obvious the duffers were raised as city kids, because lmao everyone who lives in a midwestern small town would immediately take notice of a goddamn military base being built beneath the mall), but there are minor things too, like the entire scoops plotline: all four of them realistically would have been shot on sight and Steve and Robin are extremely lucky that all they did was smack Steve around a little and then give them funny drugs that they were able to “puke up” despite said drugs being injected into their bloodstream 🙃 it was also very stupid of them to go in with no kind of weapon, no plan, and without having told anyone where they were going and what they were doing. this wasn’t like season one where no one really knew what they were getting into, this was three teenagers and a child breaking into what they fully believed was a facility being run by Russian spies

S4 is even more egregious with the final showdown against Vecna. I’ve seen people try to argue that the plan was meant to be bad because of how desperate the characters were, but the problem isn’t that it’s a bad plan, the problem is that it’s a bad plan that works at all. the entire plan hinges on Max keeping Vecna distracted and then using the power of music to get away, but Vecna has literally no reason to go after Max again, knowing that she knows how to escape, when there’s an entire town full of potentially traumatized teenagers to choose from. but I guess he doesn’t have any backup options at all. and I guess he has to psychologically torment his sacrifices first for the gates to open, but haha that’s not ever explained because fuck you duffer brothers

TLDR: the main characters in ST only seem smart because the antagonists are written to be painfully stupid by comparison

[umbralrosa]

10 Q’s

Tagged By: @s-talking Tagging: @casketdweller, @xmpereur, @the-ghoul-remains, @hail-the-one-eyed-king, @fallesto, @alvcrd, @astra-stellaris, @calamxty, and anyone who wishes to do so

ℒ:

1. When are you usually online? It’s spotty nowadays because of school, but otherwise -- always. I’m usually checking my phone the most or popping on the comport to check the activity page or scroll the dash. I’m always on my phone exclusively reading in tags and hanging around in IM’s if they’re blowing up. I’m eastern standard time in the U.S. so I’m particularly on my phone around 10-12 and my computer is varied.

2. What verses are you involved in? Yes. Just check the verses page I got one too many: Tokyo Ghoul, Destiny, Naruto, Witcher, Avatar The Last Airbender, InuYasha, Demon Slayer, Jujutsu Kaisen, My Hero Academia, Hellsing, Black Butler, Final Fantasy VII, and Hazbin Hotel/Helluva Boss.

3. What is your biggest RP pet peeve? When people obviously don’t read my rules, particularly any of the information on my muse on the blog before or after interacting. I have everything on SakuYoru on this blog that should cover just about all things real-life and fictional. Usually I get the occasional hypotheticals or needed clarifications, which I do enjoy dearly, but I always have been able to tell in the interactions when someone hasn’t done the needed homework. People always specify needing all information on an OC somewhere on the blog and I have it -- then they don’t do their own part reading it. Which goes in tandem with blogs that set up a muse page but have zero information on their muse or the verse they intend to write them in -- this is particular with canon muse blogs, and this leaves me confused despite knowing what canon character their roleplaying with. I also hate when there isn’t a tag for posts, particularly OOC ones so I can just block it without issue. I also have a problem with people following the blog and never interacting or reaching out at some point -- this is exclusively for those who I tried interacting with and received zero answers or was outright ignored, because I myself am extremely socially awkward and anxious so interacting is hard even with mutuals at times, and being ignored while seeing apparent favoritism is just... It cripples my confidence y’know, so I end up doing a clean-out to see who cares or not.

To name a few.

4. Are you drawn to specific types of muses? Them broody dark types always get me. Any character with a dark trauma-filled past basically. Bonus points if they make SakuYoru think and want to come out of their shell.

5. Are there reoccurring themes in your writing that people might not notice? I’m the one who doesn’t notice, so I have no idea m’self. I think I switch between 1st/2nd and 3rd person with SakuYoru in my writing, and lean on descriptions of the character, environment, and what the character is perceiving in real time. It’s the details that SakuYoru catches, and I want that conveyed always that they are always aware.

6. What are your favourite RP trends? I don’t even know what is trending right now on Tumblr. I live under a whole different rock even on the internet. I guess one of those aesthetic boards.

7. What is your process for starting a new story with someone? Plotting spooks me, so anything off an ask or meme that’s turned into a thread is much preferred. I think a given concept of a thread is what can roll with but I prefer that go-with-the-flow vibe.

8. How do you feel about duplicates? SakuYoru is my own OC, so I don’t think there will be duplicates there better fucking not be owo. I have had suspicions when people suddenly pull an idea out after interacting with SakuYoru and add a few copypastes, but I’ve anxiously assumed that 2 times on my whole time on Tumblr. 

9. How long have you been involved in roleplaying? *squints* 2009/2010 for sure. Assuming you’re not counting the weird larp/roleplay shenanigans kids do with their siblings through characters in multiplayer video games.

10. Is there a muse or verse you could write in, but haven’t? I think I got everything covered so far. I do have to get around to that Bloodborne, League of Legends, and any sub verses within other completed verses.

[rutilation]

Caught up!  My meandering thoughts are as follows:

oof

ouchie

First off, if your work ascribes visual and/or symbolic significance to apples, penguins, and aquariums, and what’s more, the emotional core of your story is a found family of three would-be siblings, only one of whom survives to the end... I’m going to suspect that you maybe watched Penguindrum back in the day. 

If so, congrats on the good taste, Fujimoto.

Aki's my favorite character in terms of whose story I found most compelling--what with his five-car pileup of cruel dramatic irony.

I reiterate: ouch.

Don’t think for a second that I didn’t notice that Makima added insult to injury by casting Aki in the role of Denji’s abusive dad who he was forced to kill. Don’t open that door, indeed.

In terms of who I personally find the most charming, though, Asa’s my favorite.

In both halves of the story, there's a preoccupation with these little thought experiments that have no definite answers.  The city mouse and the country mouse, whether or not ignorance is bliss, and, in part two, the trolley problem. While I've seen people come away from the story with the impression that the narrative is positing a single answer--that ignorance is bliss, and that the country mouse is better off, it seems to me that these are being presented as, ultimately, false dichotomies, that there's no trick that will spare you from suffering, and that keeping your head down is not enough to avoid tempting fate. Hug your loved ones while you still can! So it seems to say.

So it goes in part two as well. There's a reoccurring theme of Asa making an error in judgement (or just tripping,) and precipitating some disaster or another. She blames herself, but it's later revealed that she was just one domino in a larger sequence of events, and that she doesn't bear enough responsibility to warrant beating herself up over how things turned out.

The flavors of the thought experiments are slightly different between parts. Whereas in part one the characters are asking: how do I personally avoid suffering in my own life, the question in part two is: how do I do right by other people?

I suppose it’s a fitting shift in priorities now that we’ve climbed past the first two rungs of Maslow’s pyramid.

I feel that the adversarial, zero-sum approach to fandom which ship-war culture engenders has blinded many fans to certain self-evident truths. Good thing I'm here to set the record straight:

Number One: the fact that both Aki and Angel have loved and lost before meeting each other enhances the heavy atmosphere of yearning going on between them. Why ignore one side of their doomed love lives or the other, when the hurt feels best in tandem?

Number Two: if Himeno were still alive, she absolutely would have suggested a threesome.  Look me in the eyes, and tell me I’m wrong.

At first, I didn’t understand why people had such a stick in their craw about the anime’s style being ‘too live action.’  While Fujimoto’s line work has a messy, impressionistic feel to it, the way he blocks and paces his scenes is very much in line with the New Hollywood vibe that the anime is also aiming for.

Then I found out this was mostly just a smokescreen for a bunch of otakus clutching at their pearls because the director said he didn’t like moe, or something.  Figures.

Mappa’s out here running a sweatshop, but the real problem is that they killed the heart and soul of the work by making Power’s hair strawberry blonde instead of pink.  ‘Mkay.  You guys do you. As for me, I'm going to go watch the ep. 12 credit sequence again and cry.

In the end, both Power and Aki helped Denji kill Makima. Power in a flashy, bloody, chainsaw-go-brrrrrr way, and Aki in an appropriately down-to-earth way: he's the only one who would have taught Denji how to cook.

I think it would be really funny if the blood devil came back as a boy this time around. If he got both a younger sister and a younger brother, both of whom are absolute little menaces, then Denji's transformation into Aki would be complete.

If I had a nickle for every time I was devastated by a ‘WINNER’ popsicle stick, I’d have two nickles.  Which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it happened twice.

I like the symbolism of giving Nayuta a messy braid full of loose strands.

speaking of which: Nayuta, both your succulent and your brother are going to suffer if you keep over-watering them.

People keep saying Yoru's true form looks like an owl. I don't really see it. It's too stylized to call it definitively one way or the other, but I'm inclined to believe her design is evoking a raven/crow. Owls are associated with war only by way of Athena, and Yoru is... more Ares-ish. Scavenging corvids, on the other hand, are a common sight on battlefields.

The Nintendo Direct announcement coming out as I was catching up made me realize something: Pochita has spent the entire narrative playing Ghost Trick. He’s retroactively erasing tragedies from existence, all while moving heaven and earth to keep his favorite human alive. What a good boy.

That's about all I can think of for the moment. My queue is now full of chainsaws. Look forward to it I guess.

have started watching/reading chainsaw man

[thefisherqueen]

Review of The Green Knight

As a lover of Arthurian legend and medieval reenactment and a once-upon medieval literature student, the new movie The Green Knight of course was on my to-watch list. Especially after reading qqueenofhades’ excellent essay. I finally watched the movie last week. And I have some Thoughts to share.

There are a lot of things to like about this movie. It was delightfully non-sensational and devoid of GoT-like violence and political power struggles. There was some really beautiful cinematography, partly thanks to the beautiful Irish mountains this movie was shot in. I love that TGK not just adopted, but instead reworked the legend. The main moral themes and outcomes, while not a literal copy, felt authentic to the Christian medieval context of the poem, involving questions around honor, courage, hospitality, greatness, humility and what it means to be a good knight, or even a good person. The movie made it beautifully clear that Gawain’s main problem could have been avoided had he just given the Green Knight a scratch, but because he chose to behead the knight while said knight was lying kneeling and harmless at his feet, there is no escaping from facing the consequence of that action, which is neatly echoed throughout the movie. The green knight, the knight with the green belt and the lord who goes hunting in the green. The lover, the saint and the temptress. What you give, you will receive, and the other way around. The cast was great (too asexual to be thirsty for Dev Patel, though, sorry). The messing up of the mistaken image of medieval europe as just white is also always appreciated. I too liked that the film didn’t care to explain some of the wonders and mysteries, like the giants and the saint who lost her head, they just were accepted as part of that world. Being somewhat puzzled and enchanted is sadly rare in media nowadays where everything has to be explained or else it’s a ‘plot hole’. The liberty this movie takes with time, with multiple possible versions playing out and the reoccuring circular motives were impressive. However, the film as a whole didn’t quite work for me and I don’t really care to rewatch it. I think there are two fundamental reasons why.

The first is that the viewer isn’t given reason to care about the main character. I think this choice is deliberate, as we see Arthur asking Gawain to tell a tale of himself to get to know him, and Gawain replies that he has none, and after Gawain takes on the Green Knight’s challenge as an opportunity to gain a tale for himself. Questions about telling and re-telling tales and achieving greatness are a central theme. However, this narrative choice poses a problem, as it results in a movie where we see Gawain wrestle through difficulties on his quest and he’s this strange identity-less puppet, escaped from the children’s puppet show. We as audience are set up to be detached from him, which makes it hard to root for his success or even his survival, despite how pretty and sad Dev Patel may look in a dirty-and-distressed state. This could have been solved without removing those identity themes by giving Gawain, if not great deeds, at least some establishment of his character at the start of the film. He doesn’t have to be likable, but he has to be something more than a drinker and brawler with a faint sense of wanting to prove himself. That is just not enough to make us attached to Gawain’s wellbeing and involved in the quality of his decision making. The rest of the movie doesn't quite build Gawain’s character either. We get that he’s uncertain and afraid, yes, but his actions remain inconsistent, his motivations unclear. His main character arch - that he needs to give up the protection of the enchanted green belt, needs to face fear and consequences rather than to rely on the treacherous protection of witchcraft - doesn’t come off the ground because we only learn close to the very end that the belt is a problem to the completion of his quest. That’s no arch, that’s an exhausting flat march and a sudden steep slope right before the finish line.   

The second problem ties into the first. Namely, you don’t need a strong emotional tie to the characters if there’s a light tone, an adventure with a side dish of some fun and humor perhaps. This movie, however, is anything but light. It’s dark. It’s grim. It’s cold. It’s wet. There’s exactly zero humor. Above all, it’s slow. So slow. Apart from an emotional connection, you also need a sit-on-the-edge-of-your-seat amount of story tension for this kind of dramatic tone and slow pace to work, and the script just doesn’t build that tension. A shot of Gawain riding through the moor after he leaves his home is just that: the confrontation with the Green Knight is still far away, there’s no looming threat we’re aware of, there’s nothing else to be told or resolved. Together with our emotional detachment it makes for a movie that switches between boring and ridiculously overdramatic, while occasionally looking stunning and taking on deeper questions and parallels. Overall it just makes for a frustrating viewer experience that lacks impact. I was left with a thorough “meh”. Which is a shame, because this movie is very interesting and could have been so good. That clever panning shot showing Gawain as a tied up skeleton should have been devastating. I should have been shouting “No DON”T do that, you IDIOT!” at the screen the moment Gawain scares away his adorable guardian fox. Instead, I couldn’t care less. Come on, Green Knight. Off with his head.    

Some final details to note: erotic movie scenes are normally already awkward, but the scenes in this movie take the usual akwardness next level. At least it’s handled consistently - whether straight or homoerotic, it’s basically all a dissapointment. (That cum shot has scarred my brain forever). Which has its own merit, I guess, but does make for an odd contrast to the camera’s loving, even somewhat objectiving depiction of Dev Patel and the way about every character tenderly touches his face. I’m left wondering what the point was of this choice. It tells something about Gawain’s failure to meet chivalry standards, maybe.  

The scenes which show witchcraft was used to make the Green Knight appear were rather cliché and I don’t think they added anything, as the Christian morality and consequences of relying on witchcraft are already addressed in the theme of the enchanted green belt. Also, it’s frustrating to keep seeing scratched-in runes used as literal magic. As far as our limited knowledge goes, runes were a whole writing system, magical only in the sense that writing something down can have a power of its own. Please, movie makers, think of something original.

Also, torches are terrible for indoor lighting. They burn out quickly and are horribly sooty, so it’s lanterns or candles you want indoors. But the use of the pentacle shown as a common talisman for protection rather than a specific symbol for evil or magic was nice. I’m not equipped to comment much on the choice of costumes and they didn't try to be accurate to a specific historic period and place anyway, but would have loved to see more men in long robes like the beautiful ones they gave king Arthur. Somehow, medieval themed movies only seem to go for the pants and knee-length tunic style for men, while long dress-like garments were in fact very common. Gawain’s beautifully patterned yellow mantle was the brightest point of the entire movie.      

[anti-catradora-receipts]

Idk if this has only happened to me, but it seems that whenever I bring up being anti-catradora with people they claim I'm Lesphobic or simply want a "Fetishized Version" of a Lesbian Relationship in media. No, what I want is a good portrayal of not just Lesbian romance, but LGBT romance. But since I don't like the abusive & incestuous lgbt relationship, I'm the problematic one. It's tiring. (P.S: Do you know of any Discord Servers that are accepting of Anti-Catradora?)

(updated: with link to chat room!)

Dear anon,

Firstly, I’m really sorry but I no longer know about a discord server accepting of anti-catradora people. I used to but I think the link to the server disappeared. 

Update: Here’s a link to a chat room that is accepting of anti-catradora people.

Secondly, I’m really sorry that you were treated that way. That’s not okay.

I haven’t personally experienced this specific issue. But I have seen people call anti-catradora people “lesbophobic” and accused anti-catradora people of not liking complex w|w relationships. In fact, I’ve seen people call anti-catradora people a lot of terrible things. 

That kind of behavior is unacceptable.

But I just want to unpack this statement here:

“or simply want a "Fetishized Version" of a Lesbian Relationship in media.”

I feel that the people who make this accusation of “anti-catradora people just want a “Fetishized” w|w relationship or a “sunshine and rainbows” w|w relationship” actually has an underlying meaning. The statement presents the fact that these people want more portrayals of conflict in w|w relationships in the media.

And I also believe that having realistic portrayals of conflict in w|w relationships in the media is important. 

But conflict can be portrayed in the media in a healthy way because in reality, there is such a thing as healthy conflict in a relationship. This article presented 11 ways in which partners can have a healthy conflict (the article’s information is within the quotations): 

“Yes, all couples argue. But it’s the way they argue that determines if their relationship will not only last a lifetime, but will be *happy* for a lifetime (there’s a big difference). Disagreements and, yes, even fights, don’t actually have to be emotionally distressing or negative. The happiest relationships don’t avoid or fear disagreements, but use them to become closer. Here’s how to have healthy fights with your partner and use disagreements to strengthen your relationship:

1. Make requests, not complaints.

If you’re not getting what you want out of the relationship (but your partner loves you and treats you well), you’re likely not asking for it the right way. 

Make your partner feel like they have the power to make you happy, and then tell them exactly how to, instead of making them feel that they don’t make you happy.

2. Acknowledge your partner’s point of view.

In the happiest relationships, both people feel heard and acknowledged. 

It’s not because they never argue, but because when they do argue, they know how to make the other feel listened to.

3. Don’t avoid disagreements

Couples that are in it for the long haul cannot shy away from arguments or sweep little things under the rug. 

Get in the habit of asking the big, scary questions ASAP instead of putting them off, and remember that every bad feeling or disagreement should be addressed. 

Communicate everything you’re feeling with your partner, and listen when they’re communicating to you.

If you find that your partner doesn’t voice little things but then blows up with bigger arguments, or that it’s hard for you to bring up issues, make it a priority to check in with each other.

4. Take turns talking

Couples who know how to argue have mastered the art of give and take — a useful conversation will include both people listening and responding. 

An unproductive fight will include one person speaking the entire time, or both people speaking without responding to what the other one said. Interrupting means you’re listening in order to respond, not listening in order to understand — wait until your partner is finished talking, and then respond to what they said before bringing up a new point. 

Don’t talk for too long without giving your partner a chance to respond, and always ask A LOT of questions.

5. Be curious about reoccurring disagreements

Fights should technically be solved after you’re done having them, but that’s likely not the case. 

Couples usually have one specific thing they fight about the most, and might even have one time of day or week that they fight the most. 

Notice the arguments that reoccur, and look for any patterns in your arguing.

6. Don’t label

No matter how mad you get and how much that inner temper in all of us might flare up, resist the urge to unleash your anger in your speech. 

Think through everything you say so you don’t say anything you don’t truly mean. 

Don’t label their actions as bad or wrong — instead, just explain why the specific actions hurt you and what about your past or priorities make you care about that specific action. 

This should go without saying, but absolutely zero name calling under any circumstance.

7. Know when to pause

If you feel like a fight is getting too heated, say, “can we revisit this in the morning?” or offer to do something relaxing together so you can both reset your perspective. 

But here’s the key: whatever it is, make sure you’re taking a pause together. 

Pauses should not mean not talking at all or spending some time apart (that will only build up anger). 

They’re meant to remind both of you that you care more about the other person than you do about the fight.

8. Set mutual rules for your arguments

You probably have made argument mistakes in the past (all couples do) that you’ve learned from, whether it was a subject that was particularly sensitive for your partner or a statement you didn’t mean. 

Making mistakes is a good thing, as it gives you the groundwork to potential rules you can make together to argue better and more efficiently. 

Whether it’s no interrupting or no generalizing, come up with a set of rules that will help you both disagree in a productive way that won’t cause any more hurt.

9. Give your partner the benefit of the doubt

Part of being in a happy, supportive relationship means always seeing the best in your partner. 

This doesn’t mean you can never feel hurt or angry, but it does mean that if there are little things you don’t really care about, let them go and realize your annoyance or anger is about something other than your partner. 

You should also separate your insecurities from your partner’s actual actions, and make sure you don’t jump to conclusions based on your own fears. 

A healthy relationship means both people assume their partner is doing the best they can, and not doubting their love or dedication to you.

10. Learn the right way to apologize to your partner

Because what would a relationship article be if I didn’t mention love languages, right? 

Whether or not you were wrong is irrelevant — if you’re in a fight, you should want to get back to a happy equilibrium as soon as possible. 

Instead of just saying “sorry,” put a little extra effort into making your partner feel loved and secure after every argument. 

If they’re a words-of-affirmation person, tell them how much you love them, or if they’re more acts of service, finish a chore they usually do.

11. Rather than you against your partner, remember that it’s you two against the problem

As cliche as it sounds, you’re on the same team. 

Every argument you’ll ever have should be thought about through the lens of how to fix it, rather than how to win it — because when you find the person that you like enough to spend your life with and love enough to standby through ups and downs, do the dirty dishes in the sink or a careless comment really matter? 

What matters — and will continue to matter through the rest of your lives — is the strength of your relationship and the happiness of your partner.”

Moreover, there are lots of ways of portraying healthy conflict in w|w relationships in the media. 

But the conflicts that Adora and Catra have throughout the show are not healthy. Catra abuses Adora and attempts to murder Adora. And that’s not healthy whatsoever. 

Lastly, I understand your fatigue because I’m also very tired. Please make sure you are taking time to rest. 

For me, I’m going to try to highlight the problems with Catradora as much as possible, so that this kind of poor LGBT+ representation is not repeated in the future. And thankfully, I see more and more people coming to the realization that Catradora is poorly written and extremely problematic. 

Thus, progress is on the horizon.

Again, I just want you to remember to please take care of your mental health, especially if you’ve been harassed or bullied. It’s perfectly okay to take some time to heal and recover. 

Thank you very much for sharing. ✨