#this is 100% inspired by my own behavior

[whatsfourteenupto]

Fourteen is the errand friend who just likes to go places with everyone. Someone running to pick up the takeout? He’s in the passenger seat. Rose is swinging by a friend’s to grab something for a school project? She’s got a shadow. Donna needs to stop by the post office and drop something off? “Can I tag along?” He doesn’t even offer to give them a lift in the TARDIS most of the time, he just sees someone going somewhere and is like “Me too!”

[jweekgoji]

Hello. Can a Resquest, TFO! Yandere Sentinel prime x Femme cybertronian reader who is his conjux

Yandere!Sentinel Prime/Femme!Reader. (hcs. NSFW!)

haven't done requests for a long time so better do it now until my inspiration is gone haha

tw: spoilers for Transformers One; yandere Sentinel Prime, mentions of punishment, stalking, manipulation, controlling behavior, hints on grooming; NSFW at the end.

Yan!Sentinel has no interest in someone who is bold, bossy or demanding like him. At first, it might amuse him when you put up a fight and show your disrespect to him but it quickly gets boring. Even if, somehow, he chose a darling who liked to fight him, his patience would run thin. He literally killed so many bots just to feel like he's in power. Plus, he's looking for his conjunx, not another bodyguard or a troublemaker. He already had enough of them in Iacon.

Yan!Sentinel has a type. imo his perfect type would be someone young, inexperienced and naive. Sentinel is careful and he wants everything to go the way HE wants...and yandere Sentinel just ×100 this need of being in control. He might pick his conjunx from the low rankings, of course, after looking through thousands of bots' profiles until he finds you, a hardworking little femme who was created not so long ago, probably a big fan of him too! Isn't it perfect?

Yan!Sentinel can go even further and be the one you first see in this world. This way, he could teach you everything you should and should not know. You just can't not to trust him, considering how charming and sweet he is to you.

Yan!Sentinel might have trouble with choosing. Should he let his conjunx keep their t-cog? Should he keep it away? Sentinel really wants his darling to be betterthan other bots because you're his conjunx endura, but at the same time he never thinks of you as his equal. 

It might sound cruel at first, but he does love you, in his own way, of course. He adores you, he takes care of you, and he even makes sure you won't get in trouble, but if you think about it, is it genuine love you get or are you just some sort of pet?

Yan!Sentinel is controlling. When he's busy or not around, leaving you all alone, I believe that he will probably have Airachnid looking after his conjunx. He at least considers her good enough to keep her optics on his personal things, so the big, scary spider lady is 24/7 around you if he tells her to do that.

↑ You might try to talk to her once, when it's only you two alone in Sentinel's berthroom since it's well...a little awkward being in silence, only for her multiple optics to track your every move. What Airachnid knows = what Sentinel knows, so don't try to hide anything from her.

Yan!Sentinel has an ego as big as his TFA variant. don't think he would ever beg for something, but... please send him your pictures or videos! when he's busy on some important, serious mission, still searching for Matrix of Leadership, he really, really needs something to cool off his systems after a one particular stressful meeting! His joints are aching for some reason...

Yan!Sentinel loves giving you punishments. Though, he always keeps them “light”. The old-fashioned spanking, where you're bent over his lap or your chassis against his desk, is his favorite. That's the best way for him to teach you a lesson, though he never finishes up to the number he gives you. At first, he would be “That's just 20 spanks! Come on, don't you want to prove what a good girl you are for me?”and after a minute or two of your sobs and whines, he just pauses in the middle of it, only to pull you on his lap and force you down on his spike. He's not very patient himself. ( ͡°з ͡°)

Yan!Sentinel who just loves keeping his servos around you. Whether it's just around your waist, keeping you next to him, while he talks with some bot, or holding your behind, tightening his hold just so you won't try to pull away from him. Touching is everything for him, mainly because he just has to deal with a lot of stress. You're just cute enough to make him not snap at someone, despite how hard he tries to keep his persona.

Yan!Sentinel doesn't like to beg, but when he needs something, he will find a way for you to do this. It is hard to tell him no. I mean, why would you? You're either stupid or have no spark at all! He might say the most ridiculous things to thousands of bots in front of him, and no one would dare criticize Sentinel because they all love him. That's why you should too.

“What—what is it, love? You don't love me anymore, hm? I didn't do enough for you?” Sentinel muses, his optics focused on your face, feigning innocence. “Well, that's a shame. I guess I'm not worthy of you.”

Guilt keeps eating you from the inside. Guilty, guilty, guilty bot you are. So ungrateful. But you can't help but think how ridiculous it sounds. Guilty of what? For having your own boundaries? For telling him no for once? You don't really want that, but still...he works so hard for you, for both of you and all of Iacon. What he wants from you is easy, isn't it? That's not so hard. If you just lean back against his chassis, optics lowered to the ground, you eventually might feel less shame for trying to tell him no at first. A satisfied smile plastered on his face, that works so well every single time it's getting funny.

You sigh softly, letting his servo wander between your thighs. It's difficult not to writhe and whine on top of his lap when he finally pushes his fingers inside you, stretching you with just two digits. Your optics flickering up at him in hopes of meeting his blue ones, just to ask a little more, more attention, please—sssh! Not when he's busy with a big bot job. Just keep your voice down, you don't want to interrupt him, right? If you keep staying like this, he might finish faster with all his plans to give you what you need. 🤫

Yan!Sentinel enjoys it when you depend on him. He basically changed your entire life and is the only one who's protecting you from big bad quintessons, while you can rest in your shared berthroom, not a single thought in your innocent processor! That's why he knows that you might get a little lonely without him. After all, why wouldn't you? When he pleases you so, so well, you just can't help but want more. Greedy you! Can't wait a day without him? Sigh. Your conjunx is kind enough to soothe your needs. He definitely left some “toys” for you, made in blue-and-golden colors...what a coincidence!

↑ With how much of an icon he is in the city, there's a big variety of merch made of him.

[bblovetarot]

{୨୧} Why are people attracted to you? + a Quote

ʚ ═══･୨ ꕤ ୧･═══ ɞ Pick a Pile ʚ ═══･୨ ꕤ ୧･═══ ɞ

i listen to music while doing pac, so i decided to put down lyrics down that i feel are important to the specific pile. let me know if it resonates!

i was listening to the miseducation of lauryn hill by lauryn hill

. ༄ paid readings . ༄

。°⚠︎°。follow your intuition when choosing a pile. if you're drawn to more than one pile, that's okay! you may have messages in more than one.

。°⚠︎°。tarot readings are not 100% accurate, and do not dictate your future. please keep in mind that you have free will. these readings are also general and aren't specific to one person, so please take what resonates and leave what doesn't!

Pile 1

"you might win some but you just lost one"

People are drawn to your positive energy, admiring your ability to shake off negativity swiftly. It's possible, however, that you've encountered manipulative individuals offering empty promises and taking without giving. This may have hindered you from stepping out of your comfort zone to pursue your desires. You're likely someone who wears their heart on their sleeve, exuding compassion and love. Unfortunately, others may have taken advantage of your generosity, and Spirit suggests establishing stronger boundaries to protect your energy. Whether in friendships or romantic relationships, be discerning. Your commitment to connections is evident, yet you're also keenly aware when something impedes your potential. While you invest deeply, you won't hesitate to walk away when necessary, although this decision may take time. Your dedication, primarily to yourself, is apparent to those around you. Despite being caring and open-hearted, you refuse to let anything keep you in a low vibrational state for long. You're determined to rise above challenges, trusting in the universe to deliver what you deserve. You possess significant aspirations, and people admire your refusal to succumb to those who may want to limit you. Your persistence and determination resonate with others who see you as an inspiration. Your creative side, though possibly overlooked by yourself, is a gift meant to be shared with the world. The universe encourages you to press on, assuring you that your journey is not in vain. Even if you're grappling with recent departures or energy-draining situations, the universe urges you to persevere. Acknowledge your self-worth and creative talents, recognizing that your journey inspires those who witness your strength during difficult times. Your energy, though not always consciously recognized, radiates strongly, attracting people who genuinely appreciate you. Embrace your worth, rise above negativity, and trust that your dedication will lead you to the success you envision. The universe is continuously supporting your journey.

Pile 2

"girls, you better watch out, some guys are only about- that thing"

Oh dear, it seems you may have encountered individuals drawn to your physical allure, making false promises of mutual connection while harboring ulterior motives. Your captivating and welcoming nature, combined with a lack of boundaries, can attract those who see an opportunity to engage with your vibrant energy. These individuals, often described as energy vampires, thrive on noncommittal behavior, utilizing others for their own gain and enjoying the thrill of the game. The universe is sending a clear message: establish boundaries with yourself. Not everyone deserves access to your fiery energy that breathes life into everything you touch. Fight for yourself, my love, and refrain from giving everything away indiscriminately. Recognize that your fire is a precious gift, not to be played with by those who lack sincerity and maturity. By setting boundaries, you shield yourself from burnout and unlock your full potential. Your generosity, showcased in your gifts and love, is admirable, but it's crucial to discern who truly deserves your precious energy. People may desire your warmth and affection, but establishing boundaries is key to maintaining the authenticity of your connections. The universe assures you that you can manifest the deep, meaningful relationships you dream of. Despite any doubts, know that you are deserving of love and the companionship you seek. Upholding boundaries is not a hindrance but a declaration of self-worth. Rebuild your self-confidence and continue the journey of self-protection. As you assert your needs and stand up for yourself, you will attract those who genuinely appreciate and reciprocate the love and energy you offer. Trust in the process, my dear, and believe in the love and friendships that align with the standards you set for yourself.

Pile 3

"forgive them father for they know not what they do"

Pile 3, you emanate the essence of a healer. Whether in a profession that involves assisting others or simply through your natural inclination to help, people are drawn to your compassionate nature. Your emotional maturity sets you apart, allowing you to discern when situations aren't working and find compromises without resorting to chaos. As a leader in your own right, you stand firmly in your power, not reliant on others to pave your way. Individuals seek your counsel, finding solace in your wise advice. Your maturity is a beacon that attracts those tired of drama and dysfunction, as you offer a refreshing and comforting energy. You have the ability to make people feel welcome, particularly those who tend to isolate themselves. Your presence infuses life and joy, uplifting those who may be struggling. Your positivity is infectious, creating a ripple effect of happiness. Even if you possess a hint of shyness, your radiant inner light shines brightly, capturing the admiration of those around you. Your beauty, both inside and out, is truly remarkable. People are enamored by your ability to bring happiness to any situation, transforming the energy of those who may be feeling lonely or disheartened. In your presence, gloom transforms into light, and you serve as the beacon that lifts the spirits of those around you. Your light is not only captivating but also transformative, making you the radiant center of any group. People are undeniably attracted to the positive, calm, and surreal energy you exude. You are, without a doubt, the light that others are drawn to, and your presence has a profound impact on those fortunate enough to be around you.

[gladiatorcunt]

i’m thinking about modern!coryo again… ‘n the way he’d just love humiliating you. when you’ve been particularly bratty (let’s be real, any time you tell him no he thinks you’re being defiant… no matter the circumstances), he loves to shove your face into the mattress so your ass is facing him, and grip your hips, teasing his cock against your entrance until you’re whining and begging for him to fuck you. but he doesn’t! he just lets his cock slap against your clit and tease your slick hole until you’re soaking your panties. his favourite thing though, is filming you take his cock, because even though he’d never let anybody see the videos (besides maybe his friends), he gets off on the way you’re whining for him to put the phone away as he fills you up, pearly cum sliding down your soft thighs. but he won’t, because he just loves the way you’re absolutely humiliated at the thought of somebody seeing how much of a whore you are for him

CW: anal, sejanus mention (throuple au tease), typical coryo type warnings, yandere/possessive & obsessive behavior, gn reader but there is feminization (reader calls themselves a "good girl", coryo calls your pussy "sweet girl" & assigns it she/her pronouns), blood (coryo has a fantasy of you tearing), accidental slight pet play/dumbification, my modern coryo's typical inability to understand/care about poor(er) people, the ending is inspired by ghostface's finishing move in dbd, implied plus sized reader (who's afab) he loves you really.

So true, you could do something as small as say “i want to be alone in the bathroom for 5 minutes” and he’d lose his shit. Something about that arrogant rich boy behavior turned up to 100 because he’s inherently a psycho….. like he loves you deeply but wdym his prized possession has a mind of their own (if you just decided to do everything he wants, he’d support you making your own decisions). His whole vibe was being untouchable and unavailable but now it’s coming apart. Like do you know how much he planned to hoe around when his family inevitably made him get married??? But now you’ve fucked it all up and made him feel like he’s constantly writhing around in every circle of hell fr.

So yeah, he can’t take it if he feels like you aren’t “putting in as much effort” as he is. And i don’t mean that he’d be pissed if you’re not cooking or cleaning, i mean that he’d be peeved if you weren’t matching his energy (batshit balls to wall insane). He’ll do a little cute open palm wave like “Hi, baby 🥰” when you look at him over your shoulder with tears in your eyes. King of false sympathy with all the cooing and mocking your facial expression (which you wouldn’t even have to make if you were behaving). His weird ass is completely naked even though he made you keep your clothes on, and he tore a hole in your leggings with his teeth for easy access.

He’ll put his dick in between your ass cheeks and fuck you like that until the sheets are soaked because you got so desperate (you nearly pissed yourself). He’ll press the head against your asshole and see how deep he can get before you realize that he’s using the wrong whole. Sometimes he wishes that he’d tug his cock from your hole to find the whole thing covered in blood. If you catch on him, he’ll just say that it was an accident. But to be real, you knew immediately. It just gets you hot watching him go on his little power trips. The pleasure of letting your rabid dog off of his leash but he thinks it’s his idea does something to you that you’re currently ignoring.

The iPhone camera you can see from the standing mirror by your bed doesn’t exactly catch you off guard. Coryo’s got a fair few videos of you getting backshots in his family’s limo and even more of him devouring your pussy anytime and anywhere he pleases. Your stomach rolls with shame but your pussy clenches in arousal. A big part of being able to handle being his s/o means having the ability to straddle the line between calling his bluff and baring your neck in submission. So you just whine pleadingly and let your head fall forward onto the pillow.

You'd never admit that there are times where you'd be perfectly happy if your ass was all he fucked; that on mornings when the sunlight beams down on you as Coryo pushes the velvet curtains from the large penthouse windows and all you can see out of the eye that's not smothered in the pillow is your boyfriend in a pair of gray sweatpants, you feel feral with the need to swallow his cock all the way to the base and lie there forever.

A "love tap" to your clit brings you out of your thirsting. When all you do is gasp, you receive a firmer strike.

"Don't tell me you're already out of it? Did I make my smart baby all stupid already?"

"Hngh~ Uh huh, don't stop..." You beg, the carefully maintained image of the prim and proper perfect student crumbling under his touch.

Your need to be praised and to have male approval can really be a curse sometimes, because outside of the bedroom you don't let yourself be as willing of a kept pet as Coryo wants. But as soon as you're alone, you gratefully sink into the safe space he creates for you where you can just... let go and have someone else think for you for a change.

It feels like bolts of electricity go through you when two of his fingers start to trace letters on your pussy lips. It makes you think of his family crest branded on the gates of their mansions.

C-O-R-I-O-L-A-N-U-S S-N-O-W, pinching your clit after every letter. (training)

"That's okay, I like you dumb anyway. Can't use that big brain to think about anything else but me when I get this dick in you." He says and wags it in his hands at you like it's a treat.

The bed creaks as he sits back on his heels, and like a good girl you parts your legs as far as they can go.

Welcome Home.

The heavy weight of his palms clutching your hips calms any lingering anxiety, his nails bite into your flesh but you know he'll be licking and nuzzling the marks soothingly later. He's told you how beautiful you are in the beginning, that he relishes in the way you give up all tension to him with a sigh; that one of his favorite versions of you is the you that shuts down. Has him feeling like the "family man" he always vowed to never turn into.

"Now, you know the drill, take a deep breath..." He pants, somehow already pussy drunk, "It's going to be a tight fit, dove."

His grip tightens as he feeds his tip to your clenching hole, you soak in the mutters of 'aw, I missed you too, sweet girl.' You know he wasn't talking to you.

Your breath hitches when you start taking him past the tip, and like always, Coryo wraps a hand around the nape of your neck and massages it to distract you from the inevitable sting of pain. It'll always be there no matter how much of a mess he's made of your cunt.

"That's my dumb bunny, biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiig stretch." He grunts, dragging his words out when the thickest part of his cock comes to greet you.

You moan when he takes his other hand off of your hip to reach it around and rub your twitching clit. More juices drip from your hole, making the remaining inches slide in a lot easier.

You hear shuffling and the bed creaks as Coryo leans over to grab something off the nightstand. He quickly finds what he's looking for and settles back into position behind you. He gropes one of your ass cheeks and gives it a couple long squeezes before he jiggles it, letting out a low whistle when he does it again.

You mewl impatiently, clenching your pussy around his long cock. He doesn't give you what you want, however, until almost a minute later. He jostles his hips against your ass, showing off for the camera that's focused down on where the two of you are connected.

Coryo's head shoots up when he hears you sniffle, and even though he could tease about how much of a needy whore you are, you're HIS needy whore so he only smiles.

"Alright, alright. 'M sorry, petal, I know your pussy's gagging for this dick. I'll give her what she wants, don't you worry."

Your mouth falls open on a silent moan as he leisurely drags his length out of you until the tip catches on your entrance; being forced to be broken down and rebuilt around it until you both turn to ash. He has never wanted anything more than he wants you to somehow grow to only survive of his own body. His blood would be your water, his very dna would be your floss, his bone marrow would soothe your raw throat, his organs would be your snacks, his bones would be your jewelry, his teeth would be your little trinkets, and his surrounding flesh would be your every meal until you could eat no more.

You have no idea how much of your boyfriend's time has been spent making sure he tastes delectable, in every way.

Like those people from Pompei who are forever immortalized in the arms of their lover, chained to the passage of time but the eyes that dust them off are the only things about them that change.

You made him watch Titanic once, saying that your MasterChef binge could be paused for a night. He huffed but complied, and gun to his head, he wiped his tears on the arm of the couch before you could notice that he was crying. Rose could've done a little more to help Jack in his opinion (they both could have fit on the wood), he'd have never just let you go like that. But there was something in the way all they really had in the world was each other, in how calm the old couple was as the water creeped into their room; because they were together, and to Coryo, death after a very very long and happy life is an experience that's meant to be shared (no matter the circumstances).

His body has been moving on autopilot during his usual mid-sex spiral monologue. There's ringing in his ears as he tunes back into your hiccup-y whines and high-pitched moans (he loved when you stopped being so fucking shy). His thrusts had gradually sped up until they were at the speed they were now, your bodies now making wet smacking sounds as his dick pulverizes your pussy. He had been so lost in thought that he nearly dropped his phone, but he breathed a sigh of relief when he saw that it was still recording.

He removes his death grip on your ass cheek to slap your swaying tits one after the other. He can never resist showing love to the chub of your tummy either, so he hits that too.

"Yeah, you like that, bunny?" He sneers, tonguing your ear and gnawing at the lobe as the excess saliva trickles down the valley of your breasts.

It's a rhetorical question, of course you do.

But you answer, using your words like he often "urges" you to.

"Like it so much, Coryo.... fuck!"

His thrusts become even faster, and he gathers as much of your hair in his hand as possible. Your moans cut off into a gasp as he wrenches your head up off the pillow by your hair, bringing the phone around to put your tear-stained face into frame.

You're helpless to do anything but take every inch he slams inside your puffy cunt, which will no doubt be sore and red by the time Coryo's done with his latest fit. He bends down to whisper in your ear about braindead you look, sobbing with your eyes glazed over and your mouth gaping.

"Shh, that's it, keep going baby. It's all about you, these'll just be fun memories so I can have little parts of you forever, so you could never really leave me."

You never look away from the camera though, and he's suddenly overcome with so much gratitude that he uses his grip on your hair to bring you into a sloppy open-mouthed kiss; your tongues making it so wet you'd think he'd been eating your pussy nonstop with how soaked the lower half of his face gets.

He doesn't let you pull away, the impulsive french kissing only ends so he can lean his head against yours and get into the shot with you. He's smiling so warmly like you're taking a selfie on one of your numerous vacations, but his hips never stop their rough assault on your already thoroughly debauched pussy. Coryo tightens his hold on your hair and pecks your round cheek when you whimper due to the sting.

"Smile, petal."

The videos are kept in a locked folder on his phone titled “💍💒", and while he threatens to show his friends (in actuality he’d only show sejanus in some version of this au where he’s trying to force him into a throuple), he’ll apologize with his tongue swirling around your sensitive nipples once he feels like you’ve learned your lesson. If you’re really upset, he’ll offer to make up to you on his father’s yacht in Greece. (he has your bags packed already)

faetreides 2024. request rules. please consider tipping/reblogging if you enjoyed!

[pinkaditty]

Perv!Asmodeus Thoughts (Obey Me: SWD)

hihiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii this was totally 100% self indulgent it's just me thinking about Asmodeus if he was just a little more unhinged

summary: you're so innocent. he's quite the opposite.

a/n: can't really 100% say that this was inspired by anything ive just been thinking about Asmodeus and wanted to give him a little appreciation. admittedly perverted characters just... do it for me. my guilty pleasure lol <3 anyways anyways!!! answering more asks by the weekend or tmrw it depends on how much free time I have!!!! and am almost done with pervert pt 3!!!!! woo!!

cw: perverted behavior, creepy behavior, no penetration/sex but sexual acts mentioned, masturbation, non-con (no r*pe or anything just really weird scenarios in which one party is oblivious), cum eating, and other weird things that i don't really know how to tag, not proofread.

MINORS DNI AS PER USUAL!!!! PLEASE RESPECT MY BOUNDARY!

You're so innocent. And god, it drives him crazy. Your eyes make the most perfect alluring expressions, your lips curve into the most perfect smiles, and your body shaped so wonderfully… he can't help it if he feels a little wanting.

At first, he attempts to stifle it… keep it under wraps as much as he can. Sure, his eyes wander, but as soon as he starts imagining what you may look like under those clothes, he quickly tears his eyes away and censors his thoughts as much as he possibly can. Unusual for the Avatar of Lust, but he knows once he starts, he will not stop.

Saliva collects in his mouth so much he has to gulp it down as he watches you eat, teeth tearing and tongue licking and lips slurping. It makes him wonder, would you treat his flesh the same? Biting, licking, and slurping, leaving marks in your wake, swallowing down whatever juices spring forth from him before he is wrung dry? He often finds himself palming himself at the dinner table, completely enamored by your idle consumption of food, leaving his plate to grow cold from neglect. Even watching you walk is pure torture. He watches as the fabric hugs and rubs against your thighs, your ass, your torso, and your waist especially… He imagines how easy it would be to tear it apart, to simply lose control and throw the useless fabrics to the side, caring much more about the skin underneath. Sitting behind you in class proves to be a challenge, much more so when you're wearing that perfume he recommended. He bites his thumbnail until it bleeds, gripping his uniform pants, trying his hardest to resist the alluring scent of your perfume. The perfume is fine on its own, but mixed with your natural scent, it tears him apart.

As far as you are concerned, Asmodeus is a close friend, one you can come to in any scenario. He's proven himself worthy of your trust in your eyes, so you find it fit to spend time with him. Little do you know that while you suspect Mammon is going through your trash to sell things, it's actually Asmodeus, stealing this morning’s finished coffee to lick off the remnants of your saliva on the rim of the cup. While you suspect Belphegor of stealing your pillows, it's actually Asmodeus, humping into them at night, creaming to the thought of you sleeping on the same pillows he's used for personal pleasures. While you suspect Satan of nicking away your magazines, it's actually Asmodeus, taking note of which pages you licked your fingers to turn, carefully licking those edges. While you suspect Beelzebub of stealing some of your open snacks, it's actually Asmodeus, jerking off pointed directly at them, leaving his essence there for you to enjoy but be oblivious to. While you suspect Lucifer of taking your pens on occasion, it's actually Asmodeus, writing on his body how much he craves you, and then using that pen to pleasure himself, leaving his scent all over it. While you suspect Leviathan of stealing your underwear, it's actually Asmodeus, burying his face in them at night, wearing them, jerking off inside of them, all until he sees fit to return them to the wash. He just can't stop. He especially loves it when you visit his room with your guard down, having no idea how much of him you've consumed, touched, and felt just from doing your daily activities.

He's on cloud nine with how deeply you trust him, enough to feed you various snacks during your weekly spa session. He watches as you lick the icing off a pastry, oblivious to how most of it is his cum, simply enjoying the sweet-salty contrast. He is impressed with how much you'll let his hands wander as he gets a general feel of your body while you're in a robe. He's choosing the cutest outfit he can think of, but first, he needs to get a feel for your body to know what looks good on you, which is a total lie. He's letting his fingers drift awful close to your chest, dragging his fingers as they gently graze over your waistband, and pausing for an unusually long time when his fingers reach your ass. He's hard as a rock, but who can tell?

When you leave, having used his body products - to the point where you smell like him - and having consumed various amounts of his bodily fluids, he dreams of you laying on a pillow that he used to masturbate, eating snacks that he's creamed all over, using pens to doodle that are covered in his essence, reading magazines that he's licked every corner of, and having no idea about it at all.

You're just so innocent. And god, it drives him crazy.

a/n: this is short but regardless I enjoyed writing it. if I have any more insane thoughts about perverted characters ill post more.

reminder that i love likes, comments, reblogs, and asks!! tell me how much you liked it or ask for more! I'd love to hear your thoughts! <3

[sohnric]

BIGGER BOYS AND STOLEN SWEETHEARTS — K. SUNWOO

pairing: kim sunwoo x fem! reader

genre: fluff. platonic but also not really 👀 jealous sunwoo that is also very delusionally in love with the reader. sunwoo plays the electric guitar but also he's kind of shit so yn has to help him

word count: 1.8k

warnings: swearing, jealousy, the reader is basically half naked and sunwoo ogles a bit

a/n: this fic is my way of battling writer's block. uni is kicking my ass but also i thought of this in the train omw home so i guess its also good for something. this is very much inspired by sunwoo wanting to learn how to play electric guitar, me remembering i own one, and also miri @/satoruly associating bigger boys and stolen sweethearts with me and making me forever insane because of it. also reblog and comment pls its so quiet here its depressing.

once again thank u so much @csenke for beta reading this fiesty baby and thank u @from-izzy for helping me with the flirty bits i owe you my life.

“You have to leave by 5, because I’m hanging out with Mark later,” you call for him as you enter the room, eyes catching a glimpse of Sunwoo sitting on your bed, an electric guitar in his hand. The boy furrows his brows at your words, a bitter taste on his tongue making him roll his eyes as he focuses his attention on the instrument in his lap, fingers aimlessly playing with the strings.

“Okay, alright,” he hisses, clicking his tongue. If you notice anything odd about his behavior, you don’t mention it to him– and if he was self-aware enough to recognise the acid aftertaste your words leave in his mouth for what it really was, he’d be even glad for your sudden blindness to his infatuation with you.

“We’re going to the new bistro that opened downtown,” you hum, as if to only fuel the boy’s frustration further. If all you wanted to do was talk about the guy, why did you invite Sunwoo over in the first place? This was starting to feel like a trap.

“I told you about that place,” he huffs.

“Thank you for the recommendation,” you smile at him ironically, and when your eyes finally meet, Sunwoo recognises the playful glint in your eye– you’re 100% aware of the tension in the air, enjoying the way you have the boy completely under your spell, ready to be torn into pieces. It’s that look you have on your face every time a guy hits on you– the one that mirrors victory, the slightest kick it gives your self-esteem making you grin to yourself as you twirl your hair on your finger and satisfy the man with the slightest touch on his arm. You play into it– you always do– but you never quite let anyone sweep you off your feet completely.

“I thought we would check it out together,” Sunwoo says, fingers plucking at the E string of the guitar, making a dull sound resonate through your room as the background to your conversation.

“We can do that later,” you say, shrugging, “I’ll give you all the recommendations.”

“Traitor,” Sunwoo hisses, glaring at you with a tinge of hurt behind his orbs.

“Don’t be so butthurt.”

“Don’t be so merciless, then,” the boy counters, averting his gaze from yours. “Is he picking you up? I bet he doesn’t even have a car.”

“That’s an unusual way to express jealousy, considering you don’t even have a car, Sunwoo,” you grimace, chuckling at the emotional outburst of your friend. “Besides, his dad owns a car bazaar. I think the possibilities of him not owning a car are quite close to zero.”

Sunwoo stays quiet at that, the call-out making red splotches appear on his cheeks from shame. His eyes quickly move to the guitar again, hypnotizing it with his gaze, fingers clamming at the strings. 

Do you like torturing him? Is this what it’s all about? Just a few days ago, he thought he had it all– sneaking his hand into the back pocket of your jeans as he was dropping you off, receiving a ruffle to his hair after you pulled away from his hug, sending a flying kiss to him as you disappeared behind the front door. Today, all you’re talking about is Mark, Mark’s car, Mark’s family, Mark’s school, Mark’s fucking hairstyle, and all Sunwoo can do is either rip out all of his hair, or fantasize about ripping out Mark Lee’s instead– strand by strand, slowly, mercilessly.

“Whatever,” he comments, shaking his head at you. After many months of being friends with you, he should be immune to your charms. The more time he spends with you, though, the more unarmed he seems to be to your enchanting magnetism. You’re not nice to his heart, but up until this moment, he kinda liked the tug of war over yours.

The moment drags itself along before he hears you sigh from somewhere in front of him, frustration so evident in the sound. Sunwoo doesn’t really know what you have to be so infuriated about, since as far as he’s aware, he’s the one left cold and unwanted in the comfort of your room that smells deadly of your perfume (that’s so hard to shake off sometimes, yet he can’t find it in him to hate the sweet scent), but as he looks up to meet your eye, he chokes on his own spit at the image that meets his eye.

“You still don’t know how to play that riff, do you?” you click your tongue, shaking your head. It’s not the action that leaves Sunwoo feeling warmer than before, sweat almost comically appearing on his forehead– the image of you in only last remains of your school uniform does, though, as his eyes unashamedly scan the lengths of your now uncovered legs up your thighs to the curve of your bum, visible as you stare at him sideways, soft skin only slightly covered by the tinge oversized white button-down, red lace peeking out, piercing his gaze.

The boy silently shakes his head, licking his lips in a scattered manner. “Nope,” he admits, letting the last syllable pop in the now silent room, blood rushing to his ears as you stride forward and reach his position in your bedsheets.

“It’s really easy,” you huff, “you just– wait, let me show you,” you start, almost making the boy offer your own guitar back to you, before he watches you climb into the bed behind him, making his breathing hitch in his throat.

This is not at all what he expected you to do, he recognises when he feels your breathing on his neck as you lean over him, thighs straddling his back and pressing into his sides when you kneel on the mattress behind his back in order to have the best vision of the guitar. Sunwoo’s hands slip off the instrument when he finds your head next to his, your arms sneaking around his figure to press the chords down with your digits instead, strumming the strings and caging the boy into your scent and the flush of your muscles, forcing him to watch the little tutorial from first point of view. Your fingers move skillfully against the strings, having played that exact riff many times before (which is also why Sunwoo decided to pick it up, for it reminded him of the afternoons spent in the comfort of your room, laying on the rug in the middle of the floor as you played him your favorite songs), and he can’t help but feel the hair on the back of his neck stand up when your breath meets the side of his face.

“Clearer now?”

“Mhm,” he gulps, nodding. He’s too afraid to turn his head, too scared to see your face so from up close and not instinctively trail his gaze to your lips (of which curves have been sculpted in the heaven, he thinks), and so he only results to taking ahold of the guitar again, battling the reality of having your naked legs pressing into him from behind, fighting the image of your underwear out of his head to the best of his abilities.

He tries to mimic the position of your fingers on the guitar, but the fact that he remembered it wrong (or just was too distracted by his surroundings to really take the information in) is set out to him when you quickly take ahold of his hand, left palm glazing his to move his ring finger to the right position. “Here,” you hum, “that’s the problem. You keep pressing it on the 3rd fret instead of the 4th and that’s why it sounded so weird,” you laugh, the vibration of it against his back making Sunwoo feel like he’s being pumped with pure electricity, fireflies filling his stomach.

“I think it’s too fast for me to keep up with,” he complains, managing to drag a coherent sentence out of his mouth.

“I’ll pluck the strings for you,” you offer, voice saccharine right in his ear, “just try to get the chord patterns down.”

The boy nods, forcing the snapshots of the chord placements to the front of his brain, both begging to get it right so you end your little intimate tutoring session and also hoping he messes up again just to have you scold him and forcefully dragging his fingers to the correct strings– having Sunwoo pathetically yearning for the slightest of your touches. The heartbeat ringing in his own ears serves him as a metronome, and as he chews on the inside of his cheek when he starts, his head spins with the intoxication of your scent, making it hard for him to focus on the tune. 

“You got it wrong again,” you hiss into his ear, making goosebumps appear all over his skin. Oh, how mean you are– completely aware of the effect you have on the boy. He’s starting to think you love the idea of torturing him. It must be fun to have someone so under your spell, so drunk on your bare existence. 

“I’ll practice more until our next tutoring,” he gulps, laughing airly as you let go of him and move away, letting the poor boy finally breathe.

“You better,” you snicker, standing up and walking back over to your opened closet, bending over to pick up your discarded skirt off the ground and offering the boy a clear view of your bum from where he’s sitting on your bed. Now, there’s no denying you like to tease him. And Sunwoo is aware he might get burned, but like a little boy, he kind of enjoys playing with fire. “Or I’ll start to think you are enjoying my lessons a little too much.”

“Only the ones where you get all angry with me,” he notes, placing the guitar next to him on the bed, his palms now too sweaty to continue playing. “You’re kind of hot when you scream at me.”

Throwing a playful look over your shoulder at the boy, making the first two buttons of your blouse undone, a chuckle leaves your throat. “You’re not the first one to tell me that, sweetheart,” you note. “Now leave my room, you pervert. It’s almost 5 and I have to change.”

Defeated, but still obedient, Sunwoo stands up from your bed and takes slow steps towards the door, dreading his departure. The idea of Mark Lee getting to enjoy this side of you makes Sunwoo particularly green, but the feelings quickly fade when he remembers the moments from a few seconds ago, when he thinks back to the softness of your skin. Before he has the chance to leave, though, a tug on his tie yanks him towards you– the school uniform still covering his body from when he walked home with you two hours ago, carrying both of your bags,  proving as an effective attire for your afternoon hangouts.

Pulling him down so your faces are on the same level, the tips of your noses almost touching, has Sunwoo’s shocked eyes grow comically wide and his cheeks burn a crimson red. He feels your breathing fan his lips from the proximity, heart once again running a marathon in his chest when your voice purrs out in a feline-like manner, riling him up. “Always tugging on those strings, but I'll have you know, Sunwoo, you tug on mine all the time,” you grin, gaze only momentarily slipping towards his chapped lips.

Oh, you’re not nice. You’re pretty fucking far from nice– from how you’re playing with his heart, leading him on. 

Or are you not…? He guesses he’ll have to find out. 

You're a far better guitar player than Sunwoo is, but if you ever wanted a new instrument to perfect, he is more than willing to offer you his body to practice on. 

[the-s1lly-corner]

(This was inspired by an OC post I saw)

Can I request headcanons for Jax being affected by a love virus, (as in being forced to act lovey-dovey because of a glitch the reader carries)? I hope this makes sense.

Jax w/ a love virus!

might be a little different than the post youre referring to because i dont know what post youre talking about </3 written as the reader and jax already being in a romantic relationship since i think otherwise i may be uncomfortable writing it </3 will touch more on that in the actual post but!! kind of written with like, a slight angst angle at the beginning, going off my own silly ideas since i dont know specifics for this!! my toxic trait is seeing someone call a recipe "hard" and "difficult to master" and my immediate reaction is to make the thing. i learned how to make macarons i can learn how to make panettone... not today though i need to get the nuts and fruits for it

he doesnt care if he was sick, when he recovers from it hes going to be so embarrassed. will become argumentative with anyone who tries to bring it up, even if theyre being neutral or supportive of him.. it might be easier for him to come to terms with it and live it down if you (his main target) are already in a relationship with him

i think he might be really upset if he got the virus from you; regardless of if you can control it or not.. it sucks, yeah, but this isnt like a flu or cold, but

yeah

bonus points if you yourself dont show many symptoms of the virus and even more bonus points if you decided not to tell anyone about it; i think if it were like this it would warrant break up material for jax

obviously i dont know the specifics, and i do want to keep this somewhat vague so it can hopefully be morphed to fit what you, the anon, specifically saw/read

but how is he like during the actual virus/infection?

clingy. very clingy

sure, jax was already clingy in his own way before getting sick, what with keeping an eye on you and trying to keep you all to himself when you guys were alone... but this is... something else

he constantly follows you around, and might even drape himself over your shoulder while you're trying to talk to someone else

gets visibly antsy and even irritated when separated from you for too long, perhaps even becoming a little verbally aggressive to the other circus members if they try to get him to calm down

wont even hesitate throwing himself into danger. not to save you. but to be around you. "if you die im going to die with you" mentality, pretty much

audibly whines when you have to go do something. embodiment of the "nooo you hang up :3" thing but way more intense and kind of obnoxious (obviously not a knock to anyone who does it, jax is just ramping it up to 100 and beyond)

if hes showing typical... sickness.. symptoms (fatigue, fever, ect) youre going to have one hell of a time keeping him in bed. youre probably going to have to monitor him until he recovers; because otherwise hes just going to follow you around the circus

this is already normal jax behavior but hes going to push people, hes just going to do it a little more often and more aggressively in order to get to you while hes sick

[navstuffs]

A moment forever ago

Pairing: Leon Kennedy x GN!Reader

Summary: In an elevator, a moment forever ago, Leon might have found the love of his life. But it was over forever ago.

Warning tags: SONGFIC, PAIN PAIN, ANGST, hurt/some/no comfort, in italics are the song lyrics, happens during an elevator ride, love in first sight

Author's Notes: song fic 100% based on A Moment Forever Ago from the show called Central Park. my recommendation? you should read this fic as you listen to the music that inspired! every time i write angst fanfic i wonder if im going to outdo myself (creep, emptiness, ghost of you, the tragedy of leon s. kennedy) and honestly, i always try to break everyone's heart. you be the judge if i did it worse (or better)!

my leon's masterlist

It is hard to say if love at first sight exists. Some say it is pure bull, a stupid idea, whereas romantics try to find theirs on every street corner of a supermarket aisle. Leon Kennedy is neither of those. He doesn't have time for the whole arrangement of being a couple and ardently in love with someone.

He was probably destined to end it alone, which was a better deal for everyone, especially himself. But life happens to everyone, and even Agent Kennedy isn't immune to that.

"There was a moment forever ago

That keeps me up on quiet nights

And flickers like a pilot light"

It happens during a stupid elevator ride, during which nothing important ever happens. Leon is on the 28th floor of a hotel, returning from another exhausting mission, thinking when it is finally time to give up, change his name, and run away to some forgotten island in the middle of nowhere where no one would ever find him. He could change his name to Lucius Kelly. He would let his hair and beard grow, live peacefully with a farm and tons of chickens and pigs, and never return to the city, instead drinking coconut water and getting tanned the whole day.

The elevator door opens, and Leon finds himself face-to-face with you. You stand in the middle of the elevator, more to the left, not lifting your eyes as he enters. You are too focused on your thoughts, in a distant point of this reality. Leon stands on your other side, trying to give you the privacy not to stare, but he looks at you again with a sudden interest.

Staring at a fixated point in the elevator's doors, not acknowledging his presence. You don't seem the kind who will strike up a conversation or ask about the weather, nothing like that, which generally Leon didn't like. With a blank expression, you stare at the doors, which shouldn't intrigue Leon as much, but it does.

There is just something about you, and he can't quite place it.

The elevator bell dings and Leon's attention is momentarily drawn to a businessman walking in, ignoring both of you and standing near the door, too busy on his phone closing deals. When Leon quickly gives you a look, he glimpses your head, quickly turning to the wall on your side. As if you are caught staring back at him, too.

"A moment forever ago

That makes me wait through memories"

You are probably thinking he is a creep, Leon thinks. Exemplar behavior from a US agent, Mr. Kennedy, goggling at someone like that. But he can't help himself to look again, noticing you playing with the sleeve of your hoodie, a slight movement to someone who isn't paying enough attention. But Leon is. He figures it is a tiny nervous tick you develop to cope with stressful situations. You are enigmatic, ordinary to common eyes, but not to him. Beautiful in your own way. The elevator's door opens again, and a couple walks in, smiling and occupying the space in front of Leon. Leon gives them extra space, bumping his arm against yours. He quickly apologizes, but you don't seem to care, simply looking at your shoes. 

"But when I look back, all that I can find

Is that moment forever ago

Was it over forever ago?"

Elevator rides shouldn't take more than two or three minutes, but this one is surely taking longer than it should. More people enter the elevator (was there a convention of some sort in this place?), causing Leon's body to get closer to yours, his arm touching yours. He no longer apologizes, maintaining his eye on the door, hoping it can open. That's when he feels the light brush on the palm of his hand.

"Now that moment forever ago

Is home to more than one regret

A recurring sad vignette"

Or was it all his imagination? Maybe just a phantom feeling of a warm touch, a deep desire from his chest. It had to be your touch; it had to be because no one else was so close to him right now. Feeling his face burn and acting like his young self, Leon is ready to listen to your apology that never comes. He looks at you sideways, but still no reaction. He can't figure out your expression. It could have been just a figment of his imagination, desperate for human comfort. Jesus, Leon is miserable. Pitiful, an idiot.

It is the 10th floor now, and Leon suddenly sees himself asking for your name. Your phone number. He imagines your voice, the sound of your laugh. What are your hobbies, your passions, your favorite songs? The one you scream so loud from the bottom of your heart, the one who makes you cry like a baby. Leon sees him wanting something for the first time in his miserable life since Raccoon City, something that could change his life, something that only he, Leon Kennedy, could have. Something that could be his and only his.

"And that moment has taught me to know

That I can't let this one slip by me"

The elevator door suddenly dings again, and everyone starts leaving, you and Leon are the last ones. You give him a quick look as he stands his arm, letting you pass, and you exit as he follows right behind you. As Leon directs to the reception, you walk toward the exit, side by side arms brushing each other, a way to prolong this moment as long as you can. When it's finally time to depart, you look at him straight into his eyes. 

"I—" His "I" comes out so soft, so low you could pretend not to hear it.

Silence. No word comes out of your mouth, and no word comes out of his mouth. There is no one around you two. The world stops spinning, just you and him, and he can't bring himself to speak, as do you. A long moment passes, during which Leon waits for you to say something, anything, and you wait for the same. Leon wonders if you are imagining your future with him, as he imagines his with you. And Leon knows you do the same because your eyes are getting wet, and you finally stop playing with your shirt sleeve.

The moment passes, and you turn around, leaving the hotel, not looking back.

Leon doesn't follow you. He watches as you leave; probably the last time he will see you. He knows he shouldn't drag anyone into his life, his mess. Leon sighs. Maybe the romantic idiots aren't such idiots, and love at first sight could exist, who knows? Perhaps he isn't so cursed at all, he realizes with a tiny hint of a smile, walking towards the reception to check out. Because if it happens once, it could happen again, right?

"Or else it's sure to also be

A moment forever ago"

[ms-scarletwings]

Endearing through the Alien Lens: A Clue About the Primitive Irken?

I love literary xenobiology. I love it a whole lot, in fact. There’s a paradoxical line I dance across, between criticizing intelligent fictional aliens for their likeness to our species, and criticizing them for their unlikeness. It’s a pretentious and laughable dance between “Come on, the sky’s the limit, there’s no real reason for a bucket of different extraterrestrial races to just all be more flavors of quirky humanoids! Boring, show me something actually alien!!” and the yearn for the use of alien races as a funhouse mirror of mankind’s own evolution. I think the way Irkens nonchalantly dwell somewhere on that subjective tightrope is a good part of why I can’t seem to stop thinking about them.

They are inspired and yet creatively original. They are truly alien, and yet, they can still play foil to the bottomlessly decadent humanity that Vasquez’s Earth has set the stage for.

Before, in the very first brain dump I let loose about them, I noted a few of their parallels to the worst in Homo sapiens and the insects they resemble. This time, something is chewing on me that i haven’t seen another put into perspective. A something that seems contradictory to our collective view of the heartless, sexless, atomized conquerors that all of the cosmos will fear:

They… have parental instincts.

I didn’t necessarily say drives or wants; however, they undeniably havewhat seems to be an actual, instinctual “cuteness response”. Like us, like social pack animals which invest a great deal of resources and time into their young. Given that the closest thing that 100% of smeets born on the home world get to call a parental figure is a literal cold, unfeeling, automated machine, this seems kind of weird, doesn’t it? They’re not even born like mammals or nested like birds, they’re mass produced, like hived wasps or ants, miles beneath their actual society and out of the business of the adults. So, what the heck with them being written to be humanized with this baseless, arbitrary trait?

But, ah ah ah, nitpicker Scarlet, it’s not baseless. It’s only ✨vestigial✨

Y’all could probably make a good guess to what the cuteness response is and why it exists in Homo sapiens, but to sum up- it’s the phenomenon of when we see something we find “cute” and it makes us react to it in a protective, nurturing fashion- or also want to bite/squeeze things, weirdly, if it’s just too damn cute. Well, what do humans find cute? Things that resemble human infants, basically. It’s a biological reflex that makes us want to defend and provide care for our kind’s absurdly dependent and slow-developing young, rather than abandon them in the shrubbery like they’re just screamy, food-leeching paperweights.

“Pff, really? Well I must be special cause I don’t even LIKE babies. I think babies are icky gross, not cute! So, genetic instinct my ass!”

I hear you, sure, but what about… harp seals? Or koalas, or pandas and puppies and fawns and kittens? Or funny little cartoon blorbos? At bare minimum you’d have to be an alien yourself to feel nothing looking at photos of young hedgehogs

See, the fact that a lot of us may often find baby animals a great amount more endearing than even humans’ is not even in conflict with this understanding of cuteness.

The concept of the “baby schema” was formally proposed in 1943 by Konrad Lorenz, an Austrian ethologist. Fun fact is he was also the same researcher who originally observed and described imprinting behaviors, as seen in newly hatched waterfowl. Point is that his “Kindchenschema” idea grouped together a handful of infantile traits that make fireworks go off in the parts of your brain that wants to keep things alive and baby-talk to them. Included on the list were features like proportionally large heads, big eyes, round faces, short noses, etc. despite the name, the baby schema’s effect is something applied not to just actual babies, but children generally, and even in our reactions to non-human animals.

It’s the hypothesis behind both why we’ve jacked up the skulls of so many small dog breeds in the name of aesthetics and why we generally find the portraits on the left side of this image more appealing to look at than the ones on the right.

The consistency of these features across many species may also give some hint that they experience a similar phenonemon, especially given that these are traits shared among bird or mammalian offspring which require significant attention and protection to survive. And, it may also explain why this image likewise gives me a huge dose of that sweet, sweet response.

Awww, look at that lil’ mans! Look at his teeny noodle arms!! I just wanna pinch him like a marshmallow!

YOU are not immune to cuteness psychology, and neither are the proud Irken warriors. I’m going to cite Zim’s proclivity to what I can only describe as paternal bonding as a demonstration of this response, but before you go reminding me about his pak defects, it’s far from the only evidence that this is a natural Irken trait.

Check out little Timmy (importantly, the surrounding response to him), a hilariously out of place youngster who appeared briefly in the trial transcript for the sole purpose of a dark gag and to get us some lore revealed.

Take further note of the complimentary nature of smeets themselves.

Suddenly finding themselves alive, fresh Irken babies too, like the hatched gosling, begin to immediately seek an emotional attachment with the first animate thing they see. While mobile and fast learners, smeets are far from being able to truly fend for themselves. They’re tiny and naive and they need lots of mental enrichment/teaching. They also play and form something akin to friendships, much like human children. In the bygone era before Irkens were so reliant on Paks and all of the advanced technology of the modern empire, smeets would have been exceedingly vulnerable. All signs point to a phase in Irk’s natural history where they were once nurtured after by adults of their own kind, and commonly bonded with their caretakers. This could mean compact family units, or maybe even a communal raising situation, akin to penguin crèches (Personally I like to headcanon that the tallests/queens were traditionally the only breeding members of the population but that’s neither here or now). Either sense, the evolutionary remnants of a parental creature are still around.

Taking all that to note, instead of perceiving Zim as the bizarre outlier to the Irken condition when it comes to having this soft spot, I instead see him as an opportunity to see natural behaviors in action without the suppression of his militarized society and its distractions. Even someone as warped and selfish as he can be is still very, very full of love to give that he doesn’t even understand enough language to describe. He pretty clearly shows he has no cultural understanding or reference of cuteness, and still, he’s not so different in this “weakness” than the very humans he manipulated into fawning over Ultra Peepi. It just took an example his own sensibilities could relate to instead of an unfamiliar, repulsive alien rodent.

And when he’s given the rare circumstance to show that potential, well-

*(With the rough shape/size down, no nose, and huge, bug-like eyes, Li’l Meat man may actually be a great approximation of the key “smeet schema” features. More importantly, it was made to specifically resemble Zim himself)

- I feel that’s downright adorable.

[starburts-addict]

Aftermath

Note: I did my own aftermath version of the Shiny Jr fic. Some details were heavily inspired by Qeirxing's fic. Because I really did like how some things played out in their fic, but mine has noticeable differences. This work isn't 100% original fanfiction material, but it was just a fun thing I decided to write. Also it isn't 100% proofread.

CW: graphic recollection of choking, paranoia, PTSD-like symptoms,, obsessive behavior, threats (on the reader's side), unhealthy coping mechanisms

How long has it been? How long has it been since you arrived at what was supposed to be a wonderful and bittersweet experience? You don't know, nor do you care. Being stuck in such a cursed place that used to be your escape from reality was terrifying. Hell, you may have physically recovered from the multitude of attacks that day, but you haven't been the same. Constantly lacking sleep due to nightmares and you being paranoid if anyone who had the balls to break into your 'home away from home' would do so. You couldn't even call it your home away from home. It felt more like a prison you decided to isolate yourself in as Grim comes and goes as he pleases. You don't get mad at him for staying indifferent to what had happened. After all, he knew what these guys were like before your arrival in this game world.

Things were okay. You just had to stay inside, make sure you only go outside at certain times to get fresh air, and remove any social apps from your phone. That includes deleting any accounts it came with. It was just Magicam, you wished you could delete the calling and messaging in your phone, but all you could do was block any calls and texts that weren't from the teachers and faculty. Honestly, it was just the Teachers and Sam. You had half a mind to block Crowley as sometimes he would call you to start attending classes with Grim. Saying that the students have been rowdier with each other. Whatever that meant.

Grim still hung out with Ace and Deuce like normal, but ever since that attack, he's been more annoyed towards them. Fucking! Not just them! He's been annoyed at the entirety of the main cast!

Not only have they been badgering him with questions about your status, but they have been sending him home with stuff for the both of you. And most uncanny of all of this, they've been nicer to grim. Which, honestly? Has been very disturbing to him. Grim was so used to the hostility he's seen that seeing their desperate and futile attempts to get you to forgive them was terrifying.

Crewel, Trein, and Sam have the major staff who have come to visit you. Vargas was too busy making sure none of the boys could come to impose on your privacy. Crewel and Trein would sometimes tell you how holing yourself in the ramshackle dorm, but you reminded them that you aren't in a world that you don't belong in and have consequently received a trauma that you should have never gotten in the first place. Sam sometimes had to mediate when things almost turned into an argument. The three of you end up apologizing to each other. The only people you would ever apologize to in this game. Crowley would sometimes come visit and even try to demand you start attending classes. Saying he just wanted things to be less hostile between the students. Every single, annoying time he did, you'd end up threatening him with your departure to the rival school, saying that they will most definitely be the better school to take care of you. You knew that was a lie. You were actually unsure if the main side cast of Royal Sword Academy were any less dangerous. If you do end up running away, you'd rather stay on the island with the NPC residents of Sage Town.

It has just been another day that you have lost track of. Grim had come back from classes just like every other day. It's not like they get weekends off, Maybe in the story, but not within the actual mechanisms of the game. Once again Grim is watching videos on the phone on the couch, and this time you watched along. Usually, you'd spend your time cleaning the rundown place or even talking to the ghosts about your life in your own world. Beyond the game. You missed a lot, but today you were bored. You didn't like having that phone from the game. It only has reminders that this isn't your world. You started to get bored with the videos. It was starting to get dark, and you were tired of having Trein and Crewel open every single library book for you and find you a way home. You were tired of waiting. So you decided that right now seemed like the right time to go to the library. You stood up and looked at Grim. "Grim, I'm going to the library, want to come with?" Grim looked at you surprised, as if you just told him something shocking, well, it might as well have been because ever since you got here you haven't really gotten beyond the Ramshackle dorm ever since that day.

"Are you sure? You avoided stepping out further than the back door." He was worried, which brought you comfort. Out of everyone in the game, you could trust Grim the most. After all, he saved you from an untimely death and apparently cleared up a misunderstanding. A deadly one. Thinking about it, you nodded at Grim and gave him a simper. "Of course. I need to help find a way home." Grim exhaled. "As your protector, I must go. Just in case you get uncomfortable." You petted him as you got up from the couch.

Walking out the front door, you hesitated to open it, but in the end, you ended up opening the door. Off in the distance towards the mailbox that seems to stand barely. You see the plethora of packages and letters they have sent you after you blocked all their numbers and had Vargas fend off anyone who dares enter. It wasn't like the headmaster would fully prevent them from coming to your doorstep. Once you made sure the coast was clear you walked towards the gate where the mailbox was. Curiosity filled you as you wanted to see what the letters held. Although you had a huge idea of what they held, which held you back. As you patted the mailbox sorta to praise it for standing like this, one of the letters fell down. You picked it up and noticed it was from Malleus. The one who almost killed you.

You wanted to rip apart, cut and leave it on the mailbox to show the others what you would start doing if they didn't quit sending you things and harassing Grim about you but against your wishes, you decided to open it up. Grim looked at you with a concerned look. "You don't have ta if you don't want to." You shook your head. "It's fine." You opened up the letter carefully, tearing the wax seal off first and then tearing the flap off. The contents disturbed you, to say the least. The letter was desperate as soon as you read the beginning. You looked at the back, and that was even more disturbing.

The back had started off as a continuation of the beginning, but when the letter was supposed to stop at one sentence of 'I'm Sorry', it continued. The sentence 'I'm Sorry' continued towards the page's bottom. You couldn't tell if it was a diary entry that he decided to mail or what. There were two things that you can deduct. Grim had severely underestimated their obsessive admiration for you, it was beyond that. There were hardly any words that could describe this beyond deplorable behavior. Without a second thought, Grim swatted the card from your hand and tossed it alongside the pile of cards and packages he made without you paying attention. Before you could do anything, he burned it all. "No more of that. Besides, you're on a mission! Don't get so distracted [First]!" Grim stated, marching his way to the library. You followed behind catching up to Grim. Feeling relieved that Grim still wanted to protect you.

Eventually, you both arrive at the Library. You were actually surprised to hear from Grim that the library is open all day and night, but you are in a game, so you ended up losing that surprise. You wandered the library trying to find a starting place to even think where you could start looking. Eventually, you and Grim decide to split up. Hoping that maybe one of us can find a good starting place. As you were walking on the other side of the library, you felt a pair of eyes on you. Your paranoia was kicking in, and bad. You tried so hard to ignore it, but your feelings from being chased came back and you turned around.

To your horror, it was Malleus. He was about to approach you and you just stared at him. You couldn't move. The feeling of your throat being squeezed and the feeling of blood trickling down your throat, the pressure of the nails, and the feeling of air under your feet as you dangle up in the air all come rushing back as you hold back the urge to hold your throat. You didn't want to insult the dragon prince and face his wrath again. It was quite terrifying the first time, it will be the second time.

You couldn't squeak out anything, you seemed like a deer in headlights, but when you were about to open your mouth, Malleus spoke."How have you been?" He uttered. He seemed to be walking on a minefield, making sure that what he does is correct to not set off anything. You wanted to sneer at him for even asking that stupid question. You wanted to respond by saying, you clearly weren't doing well if they haven't seen them in a long time, but you advised yourself against it. "Okay, I guess." Malleus clearly wanted to rebuttal but didn't. "Have you received our cards, me and the others have noticed you haven't gotten the mail every time we drop something off." You almost physically cringed when he brought that up. You remember the card of his you read and how truly disturbing it was, but you don't bring it up. "I don't really leave Ramshackle itself." You shrugged. "I just saw the letters today, I'll read them when I get back." You said. It was a lie, of course. Grim had burned everything to a crisp after seeing you look terrified again. You couldn't tell him that though, you don't know what would happen to Grim if he found out.

There was a pause of silence. Both of you glanced away from each other to avoid awkward staring. It was annoying to you how Malleus so far has been pretending as if he didn't almost kill you. That was until Malleus spoke. "I really want you to know how sorry we are for hurting you. How sorry I am for hurting you and causing physical pain." To you, he looked absolutely pathetic for even trying to apologize. You wanted to humiliate Malleus for almost killing you, but you held back. That would make you as bad as the main cast. "… Don't worry about it. Just drop it." You ended up insisting. The fae prince seemed saddened by your response but didn't say anything. After all, he isn't the type to beg from what you gathered from his character when you played the game in the comfort of your room.

More silence ensued, but instead of Malleus breaking the silence, you did. "What brings you to the library?" Malleus seemed surprised that you asked him something about him, even if it was to ask about the purpose of his arrival. Just for a second, he seemed a little too happy for your taste. "I'm here on club activities, I would like to see the architecture of the library." He sounded a little too desperate. That caused you suspicion, instead of egging on, you thought it was best if you didn't.

Then you heard more voices coming in through the library, they sounded loud. Well, at least one of them did. The other one tried to shush the loud voice. You knew who they were. It sounded exactly like Silver and Sebek. "It sounds as if Silver and Sebek are here, I'll leave." You bluntly stated. Before you could turn around, you heard loud footsteps coming closer and almost at a running speed and then you heard him. "MY LO-" Sebek had cut himself off as he saw you. You recoiled at his voice, which was the loudest thing in the library. Then Silver and Grim came along. You weren't as scared of Silver as you were of Sebek and Malleus, but you were terrified of him nonetheless. You took a small step back and Grim took the initiative to stand in front of you just in case.

You were surprised to see Sebek kneel in front of you. Before Silver could say anything to prevent him from saying anything, Sebek yelled his apology. "Player, please forgive me for my insolence! Punish me as you see fit!" Malleus was left stunned and Silver grabbed Sebek and pulled him up and covered his mouth. It seemed out of character to you, Silver isn't really the type to get physical unless he has to. Grim was stunned at Sebek, dumbfounded even. The sleepy knight turned to Malleus and tried to hold himself back from scolding his lord. "My Lord, please stop trying to run off like that. We're lucky that Sebek has a good eye and saw where you ran off to." Malleus cringed when he said that. You looked at Malleus suspiciously. "I thought you said you were here for club activities." Silver looked at you and Malleus, he seemed to have had the color of his face drained as he still held Sebek who sounded muffled and tried to shake Silver off. Malleus couldn't even look you in the eye and turned his head in shame.

Grim shook his head in disappointment. "You guys keep making things worse for yourselves." You looked at Grim and then at the three Diasomnia members before speaking. "We'll take our leave, let's go Grim." You walked off towards the end of the row of books to avoid going through the three men who tried to bring harm to you once. Grim followed behind you and three other men seemed like they wanted to protest your departure, but they walked in the opposite direction.

The way back to Ramshackle was quiet, but you were busy thinking about that interaction. Maybe it would be best if you visit the library later in the night whenever you want to do research.

[codenamesazanka]

I need help writing the league of villains for a fan fiction. Like can you give me tips on to write their dialogue and stuff like that

Thanks for the ask! Here are some things that I think would be helpful, but please be aware that it's my approach to writing the League the way I interpret them. I'm sure there's people who finds my fic wildly inaccurate in terms of characterization. Sometimes I go back months later and disagree with my own stuff, given new information or outlook. You'll have different interpretations than me, and that's okay. And thus,

Tip #1: First of all, it’s fanfic, it’s fun, and it’s yours. You can do whatever the heck you want! It does not matter at all what you do with the characters, their dialogue, their personalities, their relationships, etc. I’ve read plenty of AU fanfics where I could not recognize Shigaraki Tomura/Shimura Tenko, despite the character having the name, but I still liked the story okay. Really, it’s all up to you and what you want. 

That said, to actually answer your question:

Tip #2: Re-read the manga. Read the scanlations - multiple versions from different scanlation groups. Read the official. No version will be perfect, some are better than others (Viz Official has its issues, but it is done by a professional translator and I tend towards it; Fallen Angels (Chapters 1-150s) was the first to scanlate and iirc they even included translation commentary at the end of their chapters; I found mangastream to be more accurate than Jaimini (Chapters 150-250s)), but having a variety of translations will give you insight into the intention of a dialogue, and different ways of achieving it. Read the original Japanese, if you can. 

Tip #2.5: Best way to figure a character, I find, is to describe the panels they’re in as if you’re writing a very plain, objective, impartial image description. Now you have an overview of their outward behavior, their actions, their dialogue. Using that, you have the basis for developing their motivations and personality. It’s the difference between ‘Shigaraki used gamer lingo a few times here, so he is a gamer... therefore he’s obsessed with games and that’s all he does’ and ‘In the first 100 chapters of the story, despite speaking sometimes like a gamer, Shigaraki is actually seen reading newspapers rather than holding a game console’.

Put another way, don’t assume generalized descriptions or traits for a character and write them based on that. You risk writing a trope or archetype or situation rather than the actual character. 

When a loved one dies suddenly, people will be in shock, before sobbing and weeping uncontrollably. That’s generally true, but the character may manifest grief in a different way. Someone close to Toga is killed - what does she do? You can write her breaking down crying, that’s perfectly reasonable. But if you look at the manga, when Twice is killed, she doesn’t cry right away. She gets angry; she lashes out. She’s deeply hurt by his murder, of course! But the tears she sheds for his passing are few in the immediate aftermath - her grief mostly takes the form of slicing Heroes’ throats.

Tip #3: Read everything else, for inspiration, for background knowledge, for tone, for your own gain outside of fandom.

Just the other day, I read Real, the wheelchair basketball manga by Inoue Takehiko. Its three main characters are marginalized by proper society - two because they’re disabled, one because he’s a high school dropout - and there were moments where I was reminded of the League’s situation. In the first chapter, the high school dropout makes a final visit to school where his teachers didn’t think much of him, and his classmates looked down on him. As he leaves, he thinks to himself that everything he does ends in failure and he’s an idiot, all the while he takes a dump at the school gates as a parting gift.

While I can’t see anyone from the League doing that exactly shot for shot, the spirit of it - being seen as a fuck up, being unwanted, being defiant in face of that, even in a inadvisable way - is similar.

Tip #3.5: Another book I’ve read years ago is Codes of the Underworld: How Criminal Communicate. It was very informative, and I think back to it sometimes when I write for the League. 

Criminals face severe constraints on communication imposed by the action of the law, and, unlike the rest of us, cannot easily develop institutions aimed at circumventing them. This central feature of criminal lives makes communication and above all reliable communication exceptionally hard to sustain. For instance, the same secrecy that protects criminals from the law hinders their opportunities to advertise their goods and qualities… In the underworld, moreover, punishments for mistakes and irrational behavior are harsher than they are elsewhere. In the world of regular business, failures of communication can lead to a loss of business, but in the underworld they can result in years behind bars, or worse.

I don’t follow it exactly, because the League is in a children’s fantasy story, and maybe this was obvious but now that it was written out to me, I know how to give the Villains an “edge” to them that a non-Villain might not have, because as Villains, they do often logically would to be secretive and brutal and cautious. Dabi walking around in broad daylight meant their hideout was discovered and All Might literally took down the wall to the bar; a breakdown in negotiations with Overhaul meant Magne dying and Compress getting his arm blown off. 

Tip #4: Related, let the League be assholes, because sometimes they are. Let them be mean and cruel and problematic. Sometimes they’ll be jerks to each other. Nearly all of them grew up in bad circumstances where they probably were not taught important lessons and details about respect and boundaries and being nice. They are definitely not going to be aware of the intricacies of fandom's (oft-American and oft-terminally-online) consensus about problematic behavior. And that’s fine. 

I remember once receiving an ask about why Shigaraki would pull Twice’s mask off in Chapter 224. Wasn’t that terrible of Shigaraki? Yeah, it was. It was also the quickest, most efficient way to get Twice to quit his arguing with the rest of the League, so Shigaraki can announce that they are going to rescue Giran (what Twice was arguing for). After that, he puts the mask back on for Twice. If you ask me, I’d say Shigaraki thinks this evens out - he does something mean that he knows will freak out Twice for a moment, but it’s because he’s arguing for Twice’s side, and he’s putting on the mask back at the end. 

You and I would likely never do something like that because we know taking away someone’s important assistive aid, even for a moment, hurts them and we don’t want to cause them pain for even a second if we could help it/there’s not ‘evening it out’/it demonstrates a power unbalance that perpetuates ableism/there are other ways to stop someone and grab attention/we know not to touch someone even the slightest without permission/etc. But does the character you’re writing know all this? Does he care? Does he think it’s worth following these rules? Does he have time for it, does he have incentives for it, does he have the lucidity, does he think he’s an exception because of this and that, etc, etc. 

A lot of things, most people often just don’t know until they’re taught to be specifically aware. As an example: When I was younger, I knew broadly that taking things without permission was bad; but what if I took these pair of scissors from my friend’s desk and used it and put it back before the owner knew? The owner is my friend. They once told me it was okay to take it, so it counts even today, right? It was just a pair of scissors, a common household item. My friend did not care; still does not care. But knowing what I do now about things like violations of boundaries, explicit consent, the continuation of these concepts for the most trivial and mundane things even in the deepest of friendship or familial ties - I feel the need to ask to use something. That’s me and what I’ve learned through the years, though. It’s probably not going to be [fictional character].

And sometimes the League are just bad people. Shigaraki tried to kill Toga and Dabi at their first meeting. Mr. Compress is seemingly a-okay with kidnapping and murder despite his ancestor being more of a Robin Hood type. Spinner likely knowingly doomed his family to even worse ostracism and harassment from his fantasy-racist hometown when he ran off to join a group of well-televised terrorists. 

That’s also fine. They’re not real. They’re fictional Villains, and you’re temporarily using them as hand-puppets to tell a story. 

Tip #5. For dialogue, it helps knowing what each character’s voice/speaking style sounds like. Some basics:

Shigaraki: 

“Shigaraki speaks with the normal masculine contracted speech, but with a sinister tone. Surprisingly not very cussy. He likes aggravating other people though.”

Caleb Cook notes that Shigaraki talks like an overgrown kid. (In comparison to ReDestro, who “uses more SAT words, since he’s had a formal education.”)

He can be a sarcastic smartass.

Kurogiri:

“Kurogiri is Extremely Polite”

He only refers to Shigaraki as ‘Shigaraki Tomura’. Always the full name, always just that.

He speaks very formally and respectfully; however, there is also a nastier side to him that comes out when he faces off Heroes: Saying to All Might, “I can't say I like the idea of having blood and guts inside my gate, but… if they're yours, I’ll happily oblige.” (Chapter 18); mocking Eraserhead and Mic when they're being sad over him, “Have you mistaken this place for a confessional of some kind?” (Chapter 254)

Dabi: 

“Dabi is like Shoto but ruder, though not to Bakugo’s extent”

He calls people names: Toga most often, as 'crazy'; he called Spinner 'lizard' once; when he first met Shigaraki, he said 'gross'.

Note that all the examples above are people younger than him; as far as I know, Dabi refrains from name-calling his allies who are older than him: Compress, Twice, Skeptic.

He inexplicably politely calls Ujiko ‘Ujiko-san’.

Compress:

“Compress is kind of like Sero. He’s got that trickster tone to him. Gets rougher when things don’t go his way.”

Likes to call himself an ‘old man’ at age 32; talks like an older gentleman as well. 

Twice: 

Twice contradicts himself a lot. Generally, he says one thing, his alter then says the opposite of that immediately afterwards. 

However, when things are urgent or serious, his alter’s speech fades. See Chapter 148, when he confronts Shigaraki about the Overhaul plan - he spills out his feelings with no contradiction. See Chapter 224, after they find out Giran’s been kidnapped - when arguing with the League about whether to say Giran, he’s completely coherent. 

Twice argues back with the alter sometimes, rather than the alter simply blurting out the opposite of what he says. 

After he gets over his clone trauma, the alter seemed to have…integrated into himself? He still speaks in contradictions, but less so, and it doesn’t seem to be a separate voice speaking out involuntarily

Spinner: 

“Spinner also speaks the normal masculine contracted speech like Kirishima and Kaminari, but he talks like Tokoyami during the Forest Lodge arc because he’s a Stain chuuni.”

An average, normal guy, compared to the rest of the League: not very polite, but not particularly rude; no great wit or affect (after he stops being a Stain fanboy), but not unintelligible; game references infrequently.

Giran: 

“Giran is also like speaks the normal masculine contracted speech similar to Shoto, but he’s a lot more mature.”

He calls Shigaraki “Shigaraki-san”, being polite towards him as a customer. 

He calls Twice by his last name, ‘Bubaigawara’, likely because they seem to be friends beyond just business. 

Toga: 

Toga is a generally polite girl, talks like a teenager. 

She can be bad at explaining herself! Seems to forget the people are lacking context for the things she says. “Hey, my best friend Jin just got killed by a Hero, which makes me sad, as well as worried that I'm going to be cut down like nothing as well, especially because I've been told how abnormal I am, even though I think I'm a normal person just like you, because I have emotions like love and fear, as any regular human does, and that lifetime of repression has hurt me.” -> Whatever she actually says to Uraraka in Chapter 289.

Only Toga uses first names with honorifics with the other League members. This is her being cute and desiring familiarity, but still polite. 

　◦ Twice is ‘Jin-kun’

　◦ Shigaraki is ‘Tomura-kun’

　◦ Dabi is, at first ‘Dabi-kun’; after she finds out he’s Touya, he’s ‘Touya-kun’ 

　◦ Spinner is ‘Spinner-kun’

　◦ However, Mr. Compress is simply ‘Mister’ 

Conversely, only Mr. Compress and Twice call her ‘Toga-chan’. All the 20-somethings dudes call her just ‘Toga’. 

*Note what the League calls each other. They all call each other using Villain names. If the male members of the League are using first names and honorifics for each other, they’ve either gotten extremely close and intimate and weirdly polite, or they’re being possessed by AFO. 

Tip #5.5. Instead of fretting over writing good dialogue right away, just write whatever you need to get a scene over with. You can go back later to change the tone and speaking style of the sentence.

Here’s a line I had for Dabi at first: 

“Whatever hospital he works at should be shut down for incompetency in background checks.”

Wayyy too formal. Here’s the line after I went back and fixed it:

“Whatever hospital he works at should be shut down for being shit at background checks.”

Still not my best shot, but better. Sometimes all you need is just to change a word. 

Tip #6. Humor. The League is ridiculous and hilarious. Always try to have fun with their interactions and antics.

[dbnightingale24]

Wounded Dog, New Tricks

A Follow Up ‘Pavlov’s Dog’

~~

Part 2

~~

I’m sorry this took so long! My life is crazy right now. I'm getting married in two weeks, and there’s still so much more to be done! Thank you so much for waiting patiently for part 2 of ’Pavlov's Dog’ !! As always, thank you to @fuckingbye for the amazing moodboard! (As well as helping to plan both of my weddings, cause I'd be lost without you!) (Also, for being my bridesmaid) (Basically, you’re superwoman and I adore you)

Lets get to it!

Word Count: 36,221 words (it’s me, what do you expect?)

Warnings: SMUT (MINORS DNI! 18+ ONLY), Public Sex, Daddy Kink, Degrading Kink, Angst, Heartbreak, Drinking, Arguing, FLUFF, Swearing, Depression, Anxiety Attack, Violence (only a little),  I’m pretty sure that’s everything...

Song(s) That Inspired This Chapter: Just For A Second It All Felt Simple

I do not give consent/permission for my works/stories to be posted elsewhere. I do not condone this type of behavior, this is for entertainment purposes only.

~~

“I don’t get why you’re so mad at me for getting some fucking blankets and cushions,” Ransom scowls as you two enter your new house.

Daisy’s gonna kill you for letting him be the first one to spend any real time with you in your house.

“I don’t-”

“I’m already about to have the most honest and uncomfortable talk I’ve ever had with anyone, I at least wanna be comfortable.”

“And the blankets? It’s practically Summer.”

“Think of it as a housewarming present.”

“Who says I want one from you?”

“Y/N,” he growls and you roll your eyes.

“You don’t get to be fucking annoyed with me for a while,” you snap as you take your wine bottles out of the shopping bag, along with wine glasses and a bottle opener.

You made him stop at the liquor store before heading over to sign the papers. You knew it wasn’t in your best interest to have this particular conversation with him while drinking, but it’s not something you can handle 100% sober. Ransom got his own bottle of bourbon, then he stopped at Bed, Bath, and Beyond to get drinking glasses and minimal furniture (blankets, towels, sofa and pillow cushions, and a comforter). You protested, but he told you to be quiet while he took out his card and paid for everything.

You didn’t speak to him for the entire ride to your new house.

“We’re not gonna get anywhere if you’re gonna be a bitch this entire time,” he mutters as he pours himself a glass a tall glass of bourbon.

“Then you can fucking leave right now.”

“Jesus, I know you hate me and have every right to, but can you just try to be patient with me?!” he questions, clearly frustrated and you know he has a point.

You let out a sigh before throwing a cushion on the floor and sitting down, “you’re right and I’m sorry. I agreed to this and I should at least be agreeable.”

“I’m sure you’re gonna yell at me, but if you...I know I don’t deserve any grace and patience from you, but if you could just...let me get it out before you decide you hate me forever, I’d appreciate it.”

“That’s fair,” you shrug before taking a sip of your wine. “Start from the beginning.”

“From the beginning,” he scoffs before taking a long drink from his glass, “as if you don’t know.”

“I don’t know-”

“Jesus Y/N, you know you do. Everything I said wasn’t a lie and you know good and damn well what parts I’m talking about, but if you want to start from the incident with Tommy, we can. I wasn’t expecting you to stick up for me, but you did and that’s honestly what set all of this in motion. Since the first time I laid eyes on you, I was in love with you, and from that moment...I couldn’t get you out of my head. Yeah, you broke the fucking rules because you spoke to me first-”

“What fucking rule is that?!”

“Oh c’mon! We were kids! What the fuck was I supposed to tell you?! I didn’t fucking talk to anyone, and here you were asking me if I was okay! We stared at each other all the damn time, but both of us was too shy to say anything, and then you-”

“You needed a friend!”

“I wasn’t ready for you!” he defends before taking a deep breath and then a sip of his drink. “I just...no one ever defended me. Not even in my own fucking family. I didn’t know what to say, so I just ran, and I kept running. You were so fucking nice, all the time, and what the hell was I supposed to do with that? You were like some mythical fucking...anyway, I-”

“No, if we’re gonna talk about this, you’re gonna-”

“Y/N-”

“Then go home, Ransom. I didn’t do this to us, you did!”

He takes a deep breath before finishing off his drink and pouring himself another, “by the time we were in the 3rd grade, I knew I’d never be enough. You just seemed like an impossible dream. If anything, I thought I’d lost out when I saw you and Daisy becoming so fucking close, because how much room can you have for fucked up people? As time went on, I never thought you’d go for me, and I knew I wasn’t ready for you, so I just fucking stayed away. What else was I supposed to do? You never spoke to anyone unless you had to, and I didn’t even know what to say to you, so I just said nothing. I didn’t acknowledge you, I didn’t go to your birthday parties, and I sure as shit didn’t go to your graduation party...I always thought I had time to get my shit together. Then Jack came along and fucked everything up.”

“Good old Jack,” you scoff, finishing off your drink and pouring yourself another.

“He just...I knew the bet was stupid when I made it, okay? He was so fucking arrogant about it though, and it was only because he figured out I had a thing for you. I thought you’d say no, cause you’re too smart for that shit, but Jack’s a good fucking liar. He gets it from his fucking dad. I honestly didn’t care about losing the fucking money, I cared more about you staying with him, and that’s exactly what fucking happened. What’s fucking worse is that he genuinely did start to care about you. Yes, the smug son of a bitch loved to rub it in my face, but he wasn’t bullshitting you entirely. He did try. He tried to not cheat, he tried to actually be presentable...he tried, and that only made you fall harder. That piece of shit only asked me to be his best man to be a prick, but pride wouldn’t let me turn it down. I wanted to fucking say something. When the fucking priest asked if anyone objected, I wanted to scream, but you were so fucking happy. You were so happy and you looked gorgeous, so I said nothing, because if there’s anyone who deserved to be happy, it’s you. My pride and my bullshit didn’t matter, so I just didn’t fucking say anything and I got fucked up,” he sighs before downing his drink and quickly pouring himself another, while you just sat there and dried your eyes while taking a long drink from your glass.

“Then he started cheating. Only took the little fuck three months, but he was still faking like he was the man you fell in love with. At first, he felt bad and he would tell me about how he wants to be better, but the more he got away with it, the less he started to care. Then, you left and that almost scared him straight. However, the fact that your precious parents bullied you into going back...it only made him more arrogant. Then he started with the fucking bragging and it pissed me the fuck off. How could he not understand how fucking good he had it? You’re the only person in this whole fucked up world we live in that’s actually worth a damn. I would pick arguments that were dumb as hell, just to have a way to yell at him for treating you like shit. That’s when the prick got cocky. He kept saying that he could do whatever the fuck he wants, because there’s no way you’d ever leave him. We were out one night, and he’d just gotten back from getting a blowjob from some whore, when he told me that I couldn’t even get you.

So, that’s when the second bet happened. I know, okay? Don’t fucking give me that look,” he scowls as you glower at him while taking a drink from your glass, almost finishing it. “It’s not lost on either of us that I’m a fucking asshole, so you can’t really be all that surprised that I took the fucking bet. I figured I could get you and the money, and everything would be fine. For as long as I’ve wanted you, needed you, and loved you, I knew it wouldn’t be hard for me to win your love. Yes, I left out the bet, but I didn’t fucking lie to you. Everything I said was true. My feelings weren’t fake. We’ve had a lot of talks about a lot of things that make me look like a pile of shit, and I was honest about all of it. I swear I was gonna tell you everything after your birthday party, and I knew I’d have hell to pay, but it was going to be okay. You loved me, I loved you, you could finally see that it was genuine, then fucking Jack...piece of shit knew what he was doing. Beside the fact that he knew he was losing you, he fucking called while we were in Chicago. Technically, I broke the rules of the bet-”

“Oh, you two had rules? That’s cute,” you laugh humorlessly as you refill your glass. “What were your rules about fucking me over?”

“Sweetheart-”

“What the fuck were they, Ransom?!”

He takes a deep breath before pouring his own drink and looking away from you, “I wasn’t supposed to wine and dine you, it was supposed to be purely sex-”

“Because you guys needed to see how much of a whore I am, or if I’m one at all.”

“Baby, that’s not-”

“What were the rest?” you mutter, sipping your wine.

“I couldn’t tell you that I love you,” he sighs, “I obviously couldn’t tell you about the bet, and I couldn’t tell you about tell you about all of the shady shit Jack was doing behind your back.” “Of course.”

“Oh, come on! I at least I told you about all the shit he was doing-”

“SO YOU COULD GET YOUR $40,000!”

“That’s not...I love you. I have always loved you. Even without the fucking bet, I would’ve told you. I didn’t say anything at that fucking wedding because he had cleaned up his act. I just wanted you to be happy, and you’re right, we are all a group of shitheads. The money shouldn’t have been brought into this, but you’re not just another Marta to me. You are the only person in this world that I want to do right by. You think I would’ve gone to that fucking bar and beat the shit out of Jack if this was all a fucking game to me?”

He had you there. Ransom never stuck his neck out for anyone unless it was for his own personal gain. He knew how much you didn’t want him to fight Jack, and did it anyway, knowing it could all blow up in his face.

“I don’t know what you want from me, Ransom. I really don’t.”

“I want, I need us to go back to how we were!”

“That’s not fucking happening!” you laugh before taking a sip of your wine. “Nothing can ever be how it was!”

“Why not?! I’ve been honest-”

“You still fucking lied to me, Ransom! You lied and had no problem-”

“It’s not that I didn’t have a problem-”

“You decided that the money was more important than telling me-”

“Cause fuck Jack!”

“UGH!” you scream, getting up and walking out of the room, full wine glass in hand.

“Where the fuck are you going?!”

“I don’t know! I don’t feel like looking at your stupid face anymore!”

Stupid face? Yeah, you’re buzzed.

“Stop it, Y/N,” he growls, following after you as you storm into the kitchen.

“Stop what, exactly?! You’re not in my position!”

“I love you!”

“What does that mean to me?! At the end of the day, even if I do believe you, you went after me over a fucking bet!”

“I told you that I’m sorry!”

“That doesn’t make it hurt any less! You’ve probably been fucking your feelings away-”

“No I haven’t!”

“Bullshit!”

“You think I’m gonna lie to you about that?! I’ve become a fucking laughing stock, Y/N! I used to fuck whoever, whenever, and now I’m just waiting for you like a fucking idiot!”

“I don’t know why you’re waiting for me, because-”

“Because I love you, I love you, I LOVE YOU!” he shouts and let out an exasperated sigh before taking a sip of wine and running your other hand through your hair.

“You used me like a fucking toy, Ransom. I was a bet in some stupid game for revenge.”

“I’m sorry, I am. I’ll never fucking-”

“Even if you don’t do it again, how am I supposed to trust you? How am I supposed to know that you aren’t keeping things from me?”

“Because I love you.”

“You keep saying that like it means something to me!”

“It means something to me! Do you know how many times I’ve told a woman that I fucking love her?! NONE! Jesus, I didn’t take the fucking money, I’ve been texting and calling you every day for the last month-”

“I DIDN’T FUCKING LIE TO YOU!” you scream at him, finally letting the tears you’ve been holding back fall. “I miss you, Ransom. I miss you so much and it hurts because you...God, I fucking trusted you against my better judgement and you painfully showed me that I was wrong! You knew all of the shit that I was going through with Jack, and you still did this! For as much as you love me, it wasn’t enough for you to be upfront with me! You broke all of the fucking rules except telling me that it was a fucking bet, because you wanted the fucking money!”

“Y/N-”

“And now you’re standing here, as if I’m the one being unreasonable, while I’m trying to figure out all of this shit! I love you so damn much and I don’t want to! I don’t want to think about you every day and miss you every night! I don’t want you to be on my mind all the damn time! That doesn’t change the fact that I do! I want nothing more than to believe everything you’re saying and take you back, but it’s not that fucking simple! All of this is so fucking complicated...you two did this! You two decided that it would be more fun to play games and bet money-”

“It wasn’t a game!”

“That’s exactly what it was! You made a bet to see if I would stay with my husband or if you could win my affection! It was a game!”

“It wasn’t a game to me! I have always loved you!”

“But the love you felt wasn’t enough for you not to hurt me like this,” you sob.

“Y/N, I will do anything you want. Anything. You can have the passwords to all my devices, you can randomly come by my house or my job-”

“It’s not enough, Ransom.”

“Then what is?!”

“I don’t know,” you answer softly, trying to fight back more tears. “I don’t know if anything will be-” “No, don’t say that. I know I fucked up, and it was a major fuck up, but I swear you’re not a fucking joke to me! I know I lied and it was for all the wrong reasons, but that’s the only thing I lied about! I love you!”

“I love you too, Ransom,” you sigh before finishing off your wine. “I honestly don’t know what to tell you, because I just don’t know. I know...I know that you care, and I believe you when you tell me that you love me...but Ransom, you keep saying that you only lied once, but that lie is the only reason you pursued me! A $40,000 bet is the only reason you finally started talking to me! After knowing me for years! And yeah okay, fuck Jack, but what about me? You could’ve told me earlier, and while you definitely would’ve had to work much harder, I wouldn’t have walked away. Now-”

“I can work harder now!”

“The damage is already done, Ransom.”

“I need you, Y/N. I’ve never felt this way about anyone and I know I never will again. I promise to never fuck up like this again, but please...” he trails off, his voice breaking as he fights off his own tears. “I didn’t take the fucking money, Y/N.” “I just need time, Ransom.”

“How much?”

“I don’t know. After all that’s happened...I just don’t know. I love you and I miss you. God, I miss you so much, but this isn’t something I can just forgive because you’re sorry and you miss me. After Jack and all of the shit with my parents...I need time. I need to be alone for a while. I’m not saying that there’s not any hope for us, but right now...Ransom, if you want us to have any sort of chance, you have to give me time.”

“With time, will you take me back?”

You stay silent and he lets out a frustrated sigh.

“Yeah fine, lets get you back-”

“We’re not going anywhere,” you mumble, making your way back to the living area.

“What do you-”

“I’ve gone through almost an entire bottle of wine and you’ve had at least 4 or 5 glasses of bourbon. Neither of us are in any condition to drive.”

“You don’t expect us to stay here?! There’s no fucking-”

“Ransom, bitch about the furniture one more fucking time and we’re gonna have a problem.”

“If you expect us to spend the rest of the fucking day here, I’m ordering some fucking furniture.” “I don’t need you buying me fucking furniture! It won’t even be here today!”

“I don’t fucking care!” he yells, sitting on the floor, pouring himself another glass of bourbon, and taking out his phone.

It’s funny how easy you fall back into habit.

After two more glasses of wine, you’re cuddling up to him and telling him what furniture what you want. You two go back and forth about what would look good for the house but, in the end, you win because it’s your fucking house.

In the end, in all his spoiled rich boy glory, he’s able to get a bed (along with a bed frame), bed sheets, two sofas, and a few lawn chairs, and four TV’s delivered same day. All because he was told ‘no’, Ransom makes the bed frame people assemble the damn thing, and you feel bad. Ransom protests when you tip them, but you told him that it’s your house, so you’re the one calling all of the shots. For as much of a dick as he can be, all of the furniture to come (and that was delivered), is paid for by him.

There he goes, sweeping you off your feet again.

“We need food and chargers,” he mumbles, wrapping an arm around your waist.

“Would it really be so bad if our phones died? Would it be so terrible if we just ignored everyone for a while?” you sigh with a slur as you relax into him.

“What’s wrong, baby?”

“I just hate everyone. With the exception of Daisy, everyone has been pissing me the fuck off. You know she had to destroy Jack’s car so he would finally sign the fucking papers?”

“That was her?!” Ransom laughs.

“That’s what he gets for showing up and yelling for me to talk to him.”

“Fuck him,” Ransom scowls before placing a soft kiss on your exposed shoulder.

You clear your throat before asking, “what do you want to eat?”

“What are you in the mood for?”

“I don’t know.”

“Well, I’m not choosing. Whenever I’m in charge of dinner, you want to argue-”

“I don’t fucking argue with you, Ransom. You just have shitty taste when it comes to certain foods.”

“That being said,” he scowls, “what do you wanna eat?”

“I don’t know,” you repeat with a shrug.

“Well, are you having a good day or a bad day?”

“It’s been okay, I guess.”

“Then lets get Gyros.”

“I hate how well you know me sometimes.”

“I know,” he laughs as you take out your phone.

Soon enough, you’re ordering everything from food to basic accessories.

“Why the fuck did you get candles?” Ransom laughs. “Your lights work just fine.”

“Because I wanted to,” you huff, only making him laugh harder.

“And the booze?”

“I’m out of wine and you’re going to be out of bourbon soon. If we’re gonna spend the night together, we’re gonna need the help.”

“Only you need the help.”

“So, you’re fine with us being completely alone together all night?”

“Babe, we could’ve sobered up hours ago. You chose not to.”

“That’s because being sober sucks right now.”

“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I’m sorry that I made it all that much more complicated for you.”

“I fell in love with you. It just is what it is.”

“I never wanted to hurt you. I truly didn’t.”

“I don’t wanna talk about it anymore.”

“I know, but I need you to know that.”

“I do, Ransom. I truly do, but it doesn’t change the fact that you still hurt me.”

“I know that ‘I love you’ doesn’t mean much right now, but I do love you. I will always love you.”

“Ransom-”

“What should be arriving first?” he sighs, his hold on you getting a little tighter as he slightly readjusts his position.

“I honestly have no idea,” you giggle softly. “I ordered everything around the same time. Why?”

“I can set up on of the TVs if you want.”

“Or if you want.”

“Well, what else are we gonna do?”

“We can talk.”

“What do we have to talk about?”

“What have you been up to?”

“Not much.” “Ransom-”

“I really haven’t, Sweet Thing. I’ve been missing you and that’s about it. There’s not really much else for me to do.” “There’s the company-”

“That’s-”

He’s interrupted by the doorbell and it almost sounds as if he’s letting out a sigh of relief. He lets go of you before slowly getting up and making his way to the front door.

What the hell is that about?

“Looks like the chargers and bullshit made it here first,” he laughs as he picks up the bags off your doorstep.

“I got you a charger too, ya know.”

“You’re the only one I want to talk to.”

“What about work?”

“What about it?”

“What if they call, Ransom?”

“I’m not worried about it. Where do you want all these damn candles?”

“Ransom-”

“Where do you want them, Sweet Thing?”

“What are you not telling me?”

“Where do you want them?”

“Ransom-”

“Another time. For now, where do you want these damn candles?”

“A few in here and some in the kitchen,” you sigh, pouring yourself another glass of wine.

Great.

“The toilet paper?”

“You don’t have to put everything away-”

“I want to.”

“Let me show you around then,” you mutter, getting up with your wine glass in hand (and wobbling a little), and leading the way.

The entire time you’re showing him around, you can feel his eyes on you intensely, and you know it’s not because he wants to make sure he doesn’t want to lose his way.

“Your ass looks great in those shorts,” he comments once you two reach your bedroom, pointing out the connecting bathroom where he can put the toilet paper.

“I didn’t wear them for you.”

“You also didn’t change for me.”

“It’s not my fault you’re missing out,” you shrug as show him the other two spare rooms.

“I thought you wanted me to be honest with you.”

“Ransom-”

“Have you been fucking anyone else?”

“Why does it matter?”

“You know that I’m not, I just figured we’d both just lay all our cards out on the table. Have you?”

“What if I have?”

“I’ll kill him,” he shrugs as if it’s not a big deal.

“Jesus, Ransom,” you scowl, closing the bathroom door after he puts two packs of toilet paper down.

“You still haven’t answered me,” he pushes as you two make your way back down the stairs.

“No Ransom, I haven’t been sleeping with anyone. I’ve barely gone out. I do my most of my work from home and I watch movies. That’s it,” you sigh as you reach the bottom step and make your way back into the living area.

“I can get a car service and we can go back to my place-”

“Stop it, Ransom.”

“Do you always have to be so hard headed?”

“Ransom...don’t.”

“You and I both want to-”

“It just complicates things that much more. Leave it alone,” you sigh as your phone buzzes. “Fuck.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Our order is gonna be delayed. They’re backed up.”

“Shit!”

“I should’ve ordered snacks.”

“At least you ordered a fuck ton of water.”

“Fuck you! You purchased me a water cooler-”

“That should’ve been here by now,” he scowls.

“You spent too much money on me. It’s not even your house.”

“It’s your house and I want you to have everything you want.”

“I’m not yours to take care of,” you mutter as you resume the spot you were in before.

Ransom says nothing. He just sits across from you and looks at you with those eyes.

You shouldn’t have said it. Ransom has always thought of you as his, so you telling him that you’re not his to worry about? Not good. It also doesn’t help that he’s all you’ve been dreaming of since the last time you saw him.

Mentally, emotionally...physically.

“Let me see your lighter so I can light these candles,” you mumble, trying to fight off those thoughts.

“You’re giving yourself away,” he smirks as he lights the candles.

If he’s gonna be smug about it, fuck him. Yeah, you’ve been drinking, so that’s pushing you to make this horrible decision, but fuck him.

“You like this tank top?” you ask seductively as you place your wine glass down.

“Don’t.”

“Don’t what? It’s a simple question. You’re looking at me like you like it,” you shrug.

“Y/N-”

“My tits look amazing in it. At least, that’s what Daisy’s told me multiple times. Jack even said so too,” you continue as you get on your knees and crawl over to him.

“Don’t-”

“You’re the one who said I’m giving myself away,” you moan as you straddle him. “You don’t think you’ve made what you want obvious since the moment you showed up at Daisy’s door?” you ask as you unbutton his board shorts.

“I just wanted...shit!” he moans as you start stroking him.

“You just wanted what, Ransom?”

“Don’t. Don’t...shit!”

“Don’t what?”

“You know exactly what. You think I won’t pin you down and fuck you senseless?”

“Maybe it’s what I want, Ransom. Maybe it’s what I need,” you moan as you pick up your pace.

“You’re d-drunk,” he stutters and you know he’s close.

“If you want me to stop, I will.”

“You’re-”

“I want you, I know that you want me, and I don’t care that we’ve been drinking. You love me? Show me,” you plead.

“Fuck!” he moans as he cums hard.

“Looks like you made a mess and it’s my fault. Wanna teach me a lesson, daddy?”

Fucking alcohol.

Ransom’s hands are cupping your face instantly and he’s kissing you deeply. You finally feel whole again. No, you don’t want to give him false hope, but you weren’t lying when you told him that you miss him like crazy. You’ve missed his love, his laugh, his voice, his scent, his touch...all of him.

Even the spoiled and arrogant parts of him.

You’ve tried to find substitutions for his touch, but your own fingers and vibrator won’t do the trick, because you need him. His body pressed against yours, his breath against your neck, his voice while he’s fucking you like he’ll never see you again, and his fingers entangled in your hair...

You just need Ransom.

“Ransom,” you moan as he kisses down your body.

“I’ve needed you so much, Sweet Thing,” he husks as he unbuttons your shorts. “Needed you in so many ways!”

“I’ve needed you too, baby. I love you so much,” you whimper, adjusting yourself a little so he can get your shorts off of you.

“You’re wearing panties I got you?” he groans, taking note of the of the sheer light blue panties with little flowers embroidered in them that he purchased for you about two months before your birthday.

“I’m wearing the set,” you moan as you grind yourself against him.

“You’re gonna make me rip my own gift off of you?” he pouts and you laugh as you pull his shirt off.

“Fuck,” you sigh, running your hands across his expansive chest.

“Still like what you see?”

“I love it and I always will.”

“I need to be deep inside of you, sweetheart,” he grunts, ripping your tank top off. “Thought about nothing but you and loving you since the last time I saw you.”

“Take whats yours,” you beg softly.

Once again, you’re not lying. Even though you can’t trust him, you’re still his. You know for a fact that you’ll never love another the way you love Ransom. For all of his flaws, it’s clear that Ransom has always seen you for you. He sacrificed his own happiness because he wanted you to be happy, he’s never asked for more than you’re willing to give, and hes always taken care of you. Whether you just needed to cry, needed to be fucked, needed to be loved, or needed to be heard, he gave that to you without complaint or without wanting anything back in return.

Well, nothing except your love.

In one swift move, hes got you on your back and is ripping your bra off.

God, you missed him so much.

“Baby...please,” you whine as he kisses down your body at a painfully slow pace.

“You need it, sweetheart?” he teases before ripping your flimsy panties off of you.

“I always need it, Ransom. I always need you,” you confess breathlessly.

You barely have time to catch your breath as he buries his face between your legs. He pulls on your clit with his lips while easily sliding two fingers into your soaked cunt.

“Yes!” you cry out, grinding your cunt against his face.

His grunt of satisfaction only makes you even more desperate for him to fill you with his love. The sounds that are coming from between your legs should make you ashamed of yourself, but it’s not like you’re surprised. Ransom gets you excited by just looking at you. Finally having him like this again? You’re surprised you didn’t cum instantly.

“Baby...I’m so...fuck, Ransom! I need...oh God, YES!” you yell out, squirting hard and pulling on his hair a little harder than you meant to.

It’s not like he cares.

“Still so responsive to me,” he chuckles after cleaning up the mess he made. “You want me to fuck you, baby?” he asks before slowly starting to kiss up your body.

“No,” you moan and he stops instantly, “I want you to make love to me.”

“Sweet Thing-”

“I don’t care that nothing is resolved and we don’t know what the fuck is gonna happen tomorrow. I just need you to love me, please.”

“You don’t know how long I’ve waited to hear you say that.”

Ransom continues his little trail up your body, stopping to lick and suck on each of your nipples, which are still covered so you whimper at the torturous pleasure, before his lips are finally on yours again.

“You sure you want this, sweetheart?” he husks as he strokes himself.

“Please, you don’t know how much...please, I need you so much,” you beg, sounding pathetic to your own ears, but you don’t care.

“I love you, Y/N,” he groans as he thrusts himself inside of you. “I love you so fucking much!”

“I just need you, Ransom! Only you!” you cry out as you wrap a leg around his waist, “Shit! You always...FUCK!”

“Feel so good, Sweet Thing!”

“Ransom...I’m so...been so long! You fill me up so...oh my GOD!”

“The way you’re clenching me...you need it, don’t you?”

“Please!” you sob, the pleasure becoming too much for you.

It’d been so long (as far as you’re concerned), you don’t even know how you’ve lasted this long.

“Give it to me, Sweet Thing! Give me all your-”

“FUCK!” you yell, gripping him tight as your orgasm washes over you and you squirt on him, more than likely making a mess on the floor.

You just got this fucking house for fucks sake.

“Jesus Y/N!” he growls into your neck as his own release overtakes him.

As you both lay there and try to catch your breaths, you faintly hear a knock on your door.

“I think our food is here,” you laugh.

“Or the fucking water cooler,” Ransom mumbles and you laugh even harder. “You hungry?”

“Only for you, baby,” you smile at him.

You and Ransom keep at it all night. It’s not lost on either of you that you need to eat, but after being so long without one another, food is the last thing you two are worried about.

“Fuck, keep it up, baby!” Ransom encourages as you continue to ride him.

“So full...Ransom...”

“Just one more time for me, please! Needed you...fuck! So fucking-” “Ransom...please! I need to...ah ah!”

“Make a mess, pretty baby! Cum for...ah fuck!”

“RANSOM!” you scream as you make a mess all over him.

“That’s my girl!” he groans as he fills you and you collapse on top of him.

“We’re a pair of true fucking idiots,” you murmur as Ransom lets out a full bodied laugh. “I miss you, Ransom.” “I miss you too, Sweet Thing.”

“I don’t know what the fuck to do...I just know that I want to be with you.” “I know you can’t right now, but you can trust me. I can be...you are the only person I’ll ever want. The only person I’ll ever need.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too, Sweet Thing. We should eat.”

“We should rest,” you laugh as you slowly get off of him, letting out a frustrated sigh when he’s no longer inside of you.

“Maybe I should spend the night inside that perfect little cunt,” he offers as you lay beside him.

“Fuck off,” you giggle while he gets up. “Where are you going?”

“Looks like buying those blankets was a good idea,” he chuckles, walking away and now it’s your turn to let out a full bodied laugh.

In the back of your mind, you know this is all drunken temporary fun, but for now you really don’t give a shit. Hell, you’ll take all the blame. You were the one that told him to come here, you got drunk knowing how you get around Ransom, you gave him the fucking handjob, and you begged him. When you get the third degree from Daisy tomorrow, you’re going to own up to everything.

No, this doesn’t fix everything and he knows that, but for now you feel better. You can pretend for now you’re in a house you own together, all of the shit that happened on your birthday didn’t, and that you both haven’t been hurting. For now, everything is perfect and as it should be.

“Ya know,” Ransom starts as he makes his way back in, “there is a bed upstairs.”

“Shut up and get your ass down here,” you giggle.

With an annoyed sigh, he does as he’s told, “so fucking bossy.”

“Says the man who bullied the store into having a bed and bed frame delivered and assembled today.”

“They shouldn’t have told me no,” he shrugs as he throws the comforter over the both of you.

“Spoiled little shit.”

“That you love.”

“Unfortunately so,” you sigh as you take the two water bottles he hands you, then resting your head on his chest.

So this is what it feels like to finally be home? It’s amazing.

“Sweetheart?” he calls softly as you start to drift off.

“Hmm?”

“Thanks for tonight. I missed you.”

“I love you, Ransom.”

“I love you,” he tells you softly before wrapping an arm around you and pressing a soft kiss into your hair. “Get some rest.”

Yeah, all of this is temporary, but for now? For now, it’s good enough.

**

Ransom’s P.O.V

“Don’t you have a fucking wife?” I slurred as Jack made his way over to the bar, smug fucking grin as he adjusted his pants.

The red head that followed behind him out of the bathroom subtly wiped around her mouth, before walking right past him.

“The same woman every night gets boring,” he laughed as he waived the bartender over, “whiskey on the rocks. What?” he questioned as he turned his attention back towards me. “Are you jealous that she’s all mine? That she’ll never leave me?”

“She’ll fucking leave you.”

“With the way her parents want to make sure their perfect daughter stays perfect, I know she’s not going anywhere.”

“Yeah, okay,” I scoffed.

“You couldn’t even take her from me.”

“Watch it, jackass.”

“Oh, did I hurt your feelings?” he laughed, taking a sip of his drink and looking me over.

“Jack, you won a bet, then married her, and now you treat her like shit. It’s not my fucking feelings you need to be worried about.”

“It fucking burns you that, for once, you’re not getting everything you want, huh?”

“She’s not a fucking piece of meat, Jack.”

“God, you really do love her, don’t you? I’ll make a wager with you,” he offered with a laugh. “You can try and take her from me.”

“What the fuck?”

“You heard me, try and win her from me. You and your cock seem to rule Massachusetts, so go ahead and try.”

It’s not like I can blame my actions on me being fucked up. I’m a prideful and arrogant piece of shit, and my ego already took a blow when I had to watch that fuck marry you. Of course I took the fucking bait.

“What do you want if you win?” I asked against my better judgement.

“$40,000.”

“Fuck you!”

“What? You don’t think you can do it?”

“It’s not that-”

“You think she’s worth more? Of course you do,” he laughed.

He fucking laughed. It’s amazing that I didn’t snap him in half in that moment. However, $40,000 and you? That wasn’t a bad deal at all.

“What’s the deadline?”

“Her 30th birthday.”

“Fine.”

“Aht, aht, aht,” he taunted, “they’re rules.”

“If you’re so sure she’ll stay with you, why are there rules?”

“Cause I’m not as stupid as you’d like me to be, Drysdale,” he chuckled. “You can’t tell her that you’re in love with her, you obviously can’t tell her that this a fucking bet, the shit I do behind her back doesn’t get back to her, and none of your fancy bullshit.”

“What fuck does that mean?”

“You can’t treat her to fancy restaurants, no fucking trips, no expensive shows...all the bullshit you usually pull. You get to fuck her, if she allows it which we both know she won’t, and a few sweet texts here and there, but none of the shit you pulled with Marta.”

“That’s not a fair fucking playing field.”

“That’s the bet, take it or leave it,” he smirked.

Why the fuck did I have to take it? Why do I have to be so fucking prideful and egotistical all the fucking time? What was the point?

I didn’t break the rules for the $40,000. I broke the rules because I’ve always been in love with you. I’ve always wanted to take care of you, always wanted to take you on trips, always wanted to bury myself in that sweet little honeypot of yours...

I’ve always wanted you.

The $40,000 wasn’t a big deal. What is it to me? That’s just a bad night at the poker table. I should’ve never taken the damn bet, but fuck all if I can’t ever stop being a piece of shit.

Now, you’re here in my arms and snoring softly, but it’s all just temporary, isn’t it? You’re chasing the same kind of peace and happiness that I am, but you didn’t do this. I did. You’ll wake up in the morning and I’ll drop you off, and then you have a choice to make. I already know that I’ll react in the worst way if you don’t choose me, which I know you’re also already aware of. You and I both know I’m a spoiled little shit, so it’s not like you’ll be surprised.

It’s not lost on me that you have every right to walk away from me, but that doesn’t mean I can fucking handle it. A small mistake, I guess two small mistakes, could lose me everything I’ve ever wanted.

Two stupid small mistakes could cost me everything; could cost me you.

“Ransom?” you call out softly in your sleep.

“I’m here, Sweet Thing.”

“Don’t...don’t go,” you beg softly, your hold on me getting stronger as you cuddle into me more.

How the fuck am I suppose to sleep without you now?

“Just rest, baby.”

“I love you,” you mumble sleepily.

“I love you with all my heart.”

“Promise me you’ll stay,” you beg.

“I’m not going anywhere, I promise.”

I feel you relax against me and I know you’re back to your original sleep.

You are my entire world; you always have been. From the first time I laid eyes on you, I knew I wanted to be with you and only you. Yeah, I’ve done a lot of shit wrong, but you? If you only knew just how long I’ve been waiting for you. The bet? That was just pride and ego, but it meant nothing. I just need you to give me another chance so I can show you.

Now, I just need to find a way to get you to believe that. I need to find a way to keep you in my arms forever.

**

Y/N’s P.O.V

You giggle at the sensation between your legs as you moan, “Ransom.”

“So fucking hungry , sweetheart,” he moans before licking your clit, “you feed me so fucking well,” he sighs before sliding two into your soaked cunt. “You want me to eat breakfast, right?” he asks before licking your clit teasingly, again.

“Fuck! Ransom!” you moan as you grip his hair tight.

The smirk you feel on your lips has you grinding your cunt against him, which is all the encouragement he needs to keep going.

He curls his fingers and they find that spot within you that always makes you so fucking pathetic for him, and you aren’t ashamed at all.

Last night, you could blame it all on alcohol. Today? Well, today it’s just pure need, want, and desire.

“So fucking close, baby!” you whine as he picks up his pace.

As silly as it sounds, hearing just how much he enjoys your pussy is all it takes.

“FUCK!” you scream as you coat his face and the floor with your release.

Thank God this is your fucking house.

“You want me to order breakfast?” he questions with a sly smirk after he cleans up the pool between your legs.

“Not before you love me again,” you whimper.

“There’s a bed that needs to be broken in,” he claims as he stands up straight, his cock hard, proud, and leaking with pre-cum, “don’t you think it’s time we took care of that?” he questions as he pulls you up before throwing you over his shoulder.

“Ransom!” you laugh as he starts on his way up the stairs.

“Gonna christen this whole fucking house today,” he promises as you laugh harder.

Yes, now you’re sober, so you should be able to make better choices, but it’s bullshit. Making better choices is lost on you at the moment because Ransom is all hat matters to you, and right now, he’s making you feel everything all at once.

“Need you so much Ransom,” you whimper as he lays you on the bed.

“Still the best tasting pussy ever, Sweet Thing,” he praises as he cages you between his arms. “You’re just the most precious little thing,” he coos.

“Need you, daddy,” you moan as you grip his shoulders.

“Didn’t get enough last night? Thought I did such a good job since you made such a mess everywhere,” he chuckles as he easily slides himself inside of you.

“Shit!”

“You’re such a desperate little thing, baby! Such a sweet little thing for daddy!”

“Still the best pussy you’ve ever had, daddy?”

“Always, sweet girl. Only ever want you! Jesus, the way these tits fucking bounce!”

“So close, daddy! Need to fucking...ahh shit!”

“Cum for me, sweet girl! I want it so fucking bad!”

“Fuck!” you yell as you make a mess that causes him to spill into you until it’s seeping out of you.

So much for having a clean bed.

“We really are a pair of morons,” he breathes after a moment and you burst out laughing. “We definitely need to eat. We need to order something.”

“Mhm,” you agree with a small giggle as you wrap your arms around his neck. “Our phones are downstairs.”

“We should go and get them,” he smirks, dipping down and kissing and sucking on your neck.

“We really should,” you moan, grinding your hips against his.

“How about after we make sure you really like this bed?” he grunts, starting to move within you again.

“Might take a few more times, daddy,” you moan, running your fingers through his hair.

“Nothing’s too much for my sweet girl.”

**

“You shouldn’t still be here,” you mumble as you hop up on the counter, your breakfast sandwich in hand.

“Stop keeping me here,” Ransom smirks, leaning against your kitchen island, before taking a bite of his breakfast burrito.

“You’re a very hard drug to quit.”

“You’re the only woman I’ve ever been in love with, how do you think I feel?”

“Why is this so complicated?”

“Cause I fucked up.”

“Lets spend a few months apart-”

“No, that’s not gonna fucking happen.”

“Ransom-” “I already spent a month without you and it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Now, after last night and this morning, you want me to spend a few more months without you? That’s bullshit and you know it.”

“I know last night was my fault, and I’m the one who extended this morning, and I’m sorry. I just missed you so much and I was upset...this morning...it just felt good to pretend. Pretend that none of this hurts as much as it actually does.”

“Lets just take this step by step-”

“Ransom, this isn’t that simple. I obviously am weak when it comes to you and I miss you, but when the fog clears and reality hits, it all still hurts. Taking away the complete fact that this all happened during my birthday party, you chose the money-”

“I didn’t take it!”

“You still took the bet, Ransom. Yeah fine, maybe your intentions changed after, but in the beginning, the money was enough to get you to say yes-”

“Okay, just hear me out. I...I was mad, Y/N. He was being such a piece of shit after getting that fucking blowjob...it was wrong, okay? You have always been my top my priority and you always will be my top priority. The first bet was out pure stupidity and the second one...God, you don’t know how fucking angry I was. I wanted you, I wanted revenge, I wanted to fuck him over...the thought of smashing his head against a fucking wall has crossed my mind more than you think.”

“Ransom, I’m the one who got hurt in all of this. Jack beat the shit out of me, he abused my love just because he could, he cheated and lied...you know all of the shit he did, and you still hid it from me-”

“I was gonna tell you everything that night!”

“You should’ve told me before!” you snap as someone knocks on your door.

Rather hard too.

“It’s your house,” Ransom shrugs as he looks at you.

You flip him off before hoping off the counter, quickly making your way into the living area and pulling the comforter around you (as the knocking comes harder and faster) then finally making your way to the front door.

“Ransom! Open the fucking...oh,” Marta stops short when she sees that you’re the one opening the door.

“Hey...” you trail off, not knowing exactly what the hell to say, cause she’s the last person you ever expected to see at your doorstep. “Um, how did you know...?”

“His car...it wasn’t in the driveway and he never answered. Everyone knows you moved, so I figured this was the next best bet.”

“So everyone knows I live here? That’s fucking great,” you mutter as you hear Ransom walk into the living area. You know he’s naked, and the fact that Marta’s eyes follow him let you know that she knows what you two were up to.

It also doesn’t help that you’re wrapped in a fucking comforter, instead of wearing actual clothes.

“How can I help you?”

“I uh...I need to speak to-”

“What the fuck do you want, Marta?” Ransom growls as he comes up behind you.

“Ransom,” you snap.

“She has no right to be here.”

“Then maybe you should answer your phone!” she bites at him. “Would you mind giving us a moment?” she asks you with a kind smile.

“Of course,” you nod at her, standing to the side so Ransom can get in front of you.

You’re thankful that he put his boxer briefs on.

“What do you want?” he snaps, his tone annoyed and menacing.

“Ransom, don’t be an asshole,” you scowl.

“Yeah fine. Go put on my shirt or something, okay babe?”

“Don’t be cruel,” you tell him softly.

You know that he can pick up on what you mean, because he turns to face you.

“Y/N-”

“Ransom, don’t be a dick.”

“Fine,” he sighs before turning his attention back towards her.

“I’ll be in the kitchen if anyone needs me,” you nod towards Marta before quickly making yourself scarce.

You grab his shirt out of the living area, quickly putting it on, before scampering off towards the kitchen.

“What the hell is going on with the publishing company?!” you hear her yell, on your way back.

“It’s mine to worry about, so don’t-”

“Ransom, you told me-”

“Marta, stay out of it!”

You quickly resume your spot on the counter top and try to mind your own business. It’s not like it’s hard, because you feel like a pile of shit.

For Marta to see you like that and knowing the Ransom was there...you obviously didn’t mean to hurt her, you didn’t even know it was her until you answered the door, but still. She had actually fallen for Ransom and it was all just a joke to him.

It was all for sport.

Yeah, what he did to you was fucked up, but what he did to Marta? It’s not like you haven’t asked yourself a million times, but how can you be so deeply in love with someone like that? Someone so ruthless and selfish...how is he the one you’ve fallen so hard for?

It’s a dumb question though, isn’t it?

Ransom protects you, he loves you, he cares about you, he commits to you...you’re in love with Ransom, because for as shitty as he can be, he makes you the center of his universe.

“Sorry about that,” he mumbles as he makes his way back into the kitchen, clearly annoyed.

“What’s going on with the company?”

“I don’t want to-”

“No, you dodged it last night, you’re not dodging it today. What happened?”

“It’s been a rough month,” he shrugs.

“Ransom.”

“I slacked off. Got depressed, didn’t do things I knew I should’ve been doing...I stopped doing my job.”

“Ransom, this is your baby now! You can’t just-”

“I did all of it for you! Without you, it all just felt pretty fucking stupid. So, for the last two weeks...I’ve been toying with the idea of just giving it to Walt.”

“RANSOM!”

“Stop it, okay? Just stop. I know, why do you think Marta just chewed me the fuck out? I’m fucking up.”

“You can’t just do things like-”

“I miss you. This isn’t something to fucking guilt trip you, it’s me being honest. You left and everything just went to shit. I obviously know it’s my fault, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t feel fucking empty without you. The second you left, none of it mattered to me anymore. So yes, once again, I fucked up,” he sighs.

You hop off the counter and make your way over to him, before wrapping your arms around his waist, “you can’t do this.”

“Don’t.”

“Ransom, whatever happens between us, you’ve done good for yourself. You-”

“It was all for you, Y/N. All of it. All of it was done so that I could be good enough for you. Without you, it’s all worthless. There’s no future to set up, there’s no need to be at least slightly personable, there’s no need for any of it. I want to be someone who’s worthy of being seeing with you, I don’t wanna be just some piece of shit asshole that lives off his wife. I want you to feel secure and know that I’ll always take care of you...I wanted to do...be better for you. Without you around, I don’t give a fuck about any of it,” he finishes softly, looking down at his hands.

And that’s why you’re so in love with him.

Without giving it a second thought, you’re pulling him close and kissing him deeply.

No, it’s not lost on you that you’re the problem right now.

He grips your thighs and hoists you up, and you instinctively wrap your legs around him, as you deepen the kiss.

“We have to stop,” you breathe as he sets you on top of the counter and starts trailing kisses down your neck.

“Why? Why can’t we just pick up where we left off?” he asks breathlessly once he finally meets your gaze.

“We have to set boundaries...we can’t...this doesn’t help anything. Sex doesn’t make everything better-”

“It’s not fucking sex, Y/N. It’s intimacy, it’s love, and it’s home. I can fuck whoever the fuck I want, whenever I want. That’s not the issue here. I only want you. I only desire you. I love you. I’ll only ever want you, Y/N. This has always been so much more than sex to me. You know me well enough to know that this isn’t just a reason to fuck you,” he broods.

God, why can’t you just ever make the smart choice for once?

You and Ransom spend the next few hours in your bed making love, arguing, talking, and just holding one another. It’s everything you want, it’s nothing you want, and it grips your heart. It grips your heart because, with anyone else, this situation would’ve been dealt with.

But with Ransom?

God, he’s your whole world. There’s honestly nothing you wouldn’t do for him, and you know he loves you, but it’s not enough. Right now, it’s just not enough. You trusted him once and it backfired on you so bad, so how the fuck are you supposed to trust him now? Yes, you know he loves you and he wants an honest future with you, but you also know what the hell he’s capable of.

For as easy as you’d like it be, it’s all that much harder.

“How about this?” you sigh, sitting up and facing Ransom, “we still talk, but we don’t see each other?”

“Nope.”

“Ransom, I told you last night that I need time.”

“Okay, but then we made love all night and all day today. I think that shows that you need me just as much as I need you.”

“Its never been lost on either of us just how desperate I am for you,” you scowl with an eye roll.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I really am, please...lets just start over.”

“You know it’s not that easy, babe.”

“Have I ever told you how fucking annoying it is to be with someone who won’t do exactly what you say?”

“You’ve mentioned it a time or two,” you chuckle softly.

“You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen,” he smiles softly, caressing the side of your face.

“I want to be with you, Ransom,” you tell him truthfully, your eyes watering a little. “I really do, I just...I’m sorry about last night and this morning-”

“I’m not.” “I’m not saying that I’m sorry it happened, I’m saying sorry if I gave you false hope, because I still don’t know. I love you more than I can ever explain, but it still hurts, Ransom.”

He’s quiet for a moment before responding with, “you’re my whole world, Y/N. You tell me to wait? I’ll wait. You want to explore other options? I’ll suck it up and deal with it. You need space? I’ll give it to you. I thought about this until I fell asleep, and I don’t have any right to demand anything from you. You chose me, you were more than happy to be with me, and then I fucked it all up. I can’t...I can’t keep telling you that I love you and not showing it,” he sighs mournfully.

“I don’t want anyone else, Ransom. Even if this doesn’t work out, I’ll never love anyone the way I love you. Yeah, you can be pretty fucking awful at times, but you also treat me better than anyone else ever has. Maybe that’s a testament to how poorly I’ve been treated my whole life, or maybe it goes to show how great of a person you actually are, but I never truly felt loved until you came along.”

Ransom says nothing. He just pulls you close, cups your face, and kisses you deeply.

His kisses are gonna be the death of you.

“I should get back,” you sigh once you two break apart.

“Another hour?”

“This is already too hard as it is.”

“I love you, Y/N.”

“I love you too, Ransom.”

He lets you keep his shirt since he destroyed yours and promised to send you a new underwear set even though you told him he didn’t have to.

The drive to Daisy’s is quiet, solemn, and Ransom never lets go of your hand. Every time you look over to him, you can see just how broken up he is over all of this, and it only makes your heart hurt more.

It’s not like you don’t understand where Ransom’s coming from, fuck Jack and get the woman hes always loved all in one shot, great plan.

Except for the part he fucked you over.

If he would’ve just told you, it would’ve been fine. No, you definitely wouldn’t have been happy with him, but you two wouldn’t be in the hell you’re in now. Besides the fact that he broke your heart and made you feel like a complete and total fool, everyone is in your fucking business now. When you go out with Daisy, there are stares and whispers, some women look at you with pure disgust while others just give you a side-eye and give you a smirk.

You’re clearly not as pure and perfect as everyone thought you were.

Daisy’s told you that there have been rumors that you’re the one Ransom fucked on his balcony that night, and men (both single and taken) have started feeling way too comfortable approaching you about the things they’d like to do to you. The men at work snicker at you as walk by, which is a big part of the reason you’ve decided to start working from home more, and the rift with your parents is only getting worse.

What are you supposed to do, though? Explain your side of it? Fuck no. It’s not like you even wanted people in your business in the first place, so now you’re supposed to publicly put your business out there? Tell them that your parents pushed you back into something that you tried to get out of? Your ex-husband beat the shit out of you? That he spent all of his free time cheating on you?

Why the fuck is it anyone’s business?

It’s been a fucking shit show since your birthday party and a large part of that is on Ransom. He didn’t take you into account at all (even though he truly believes did), and now you’re the talk of the town. Hell, it’s not like you’d mind all that much if he just told you the fucking truth from the beginning.

“When am I seeing you again?” Ransom asks as he pulls into Daisy’s driveway.

“I don’t know.”

“Will you at least talk to me?”

“Ransom...I’ll text you in a few days. That’s the best answer I can give you right now.”

“If I could take back what I did, I would in an instant.”

“I know you would and I wish that you could, but we don’t live in a world of what we wish we could do. I have to figure all of this out, and as you saw last night and this morning, I can’t do that when you’re around.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’m too in love with you,” you scoff. “I can’t think straight when I’m around you. I act on impulse and feelings, and I can’t afford to do that right now. I had every intention of just talking to you and coming back here, but I got sad and drunk, then remembered I was alone with you, and all thoughts of rationality went out the window. I know that I’m the one that initiated last night, but that proves my point. We started and we couldn’t stop. I couldn’t stop. I can’t be around you and make a good choice.”

“Because we’re in love! It was always supposed to be you and me-”

“You didn’t work up the nerve to have an actual conversation with me until-UGH! I’m not having this argument with you again, Ransom. You did something fucked up, and no matter how much I understand it, it still fucking hurts. I always pick people that aren’t good for me, and I need time to figure out what the fuck I’m doing. What I want.”

“You want me.”

“Ransom please!” you sob.

“I love you, Y/N. I love you so much and I fucking swear...none of this means anything to me without you. I’ll never hurt you like that again, I’ll never humiliate you...I will never cause you this much pain ever again,” he promises softly as his own tears start to fall.

You need to do this.

“I’ll text you in a few days, I promise,” you sob softly and he lets out an exasperated sigh.

“Whatever you need,” he responds, looking away from you so you don’t see him cry.

“Ransom, I do love you-”

“You’ve already proven that. Now, it’s my turn to.”

“Let me know when you’re home, so I know you’re safe, please?”

 “All of this, and you still wanna make sure I’m safe? God, I really fucked up, didn’t I? The only person to ever actually give a fuck about me and I fucked it up.”

“Ransom-”

“I’ll let you know, babe.”

“I love you.”

“I love you.”

Since he won’t even look at you, you go to leave, but soon he’s grabbing your wrist and you’re turning your attention towards him, and he’s kissing you as if it’s the last time he’ll ever see you. As always, it goes to far and you end up straddling him.

“I have to go,” you moan as he kisses down your neck.

You’re such a sucker for him.

“Just a little bit longer, please.” “Ransom, I can’t...fuck, no. Ransom, we have to stop.”

“You promise to text me in a few days?” he breathes heavily as he sits back and looks up at you.

“I promise.”

“Y/N,” he sighs as he strokes the side of your face, “I love you...I’ll let you know when I’m home.”

You give him a quick peck on the lips before opening the door on the drivers side and quickly getting out. You give him one last look before quickly making your way up the steps to Daisy’s house.

“That’s definitely not the shirt you left in yesterday,” she scoffs, not even turning her full attention away from the TV.

“I don’t fucking need it right now, Dais. I really fucking don’t,” you sob as you make your way into her kitchen.

“Oh no, what happened?” she sighs, turning off the TV as she gets up to follow you.

“This is on me. I fucked up and...he didn’t do anything wrong,” you try to explain as you grab a wine glass. “God, do you have a cigarette?”

“Babe, what happened?”

“Do you have a fucking cigarette?!”

“Jesus, okay! Just hold on,” she mutters before practically running upstairs.

You don’t mean to snap at her, but your nerves are so shot at this point. You need something.

“Alright, start from the beginning and tell me what happened,” she instructs, coming back into the kitchen and handing you a cigarette before lighting her own.

You really try to get it all out in one shot, but you start crying every 15 fucking minutes, which only makes the whole thing take longer. By the time you finish explaining everything, you’re ready for a nap. Somewhere in the middle of it, you feel your phone buzz, and you know it’s him, which just makes your heart hurt for him even more.

“He was an actual gentleman?” Daisy commented after a moment.

“He’s not a bad guy, Dais.”

“To you,” she scoffs and you roll your eyes.

You know she has a fucking point. Ransom ultimately hates everyone, but (to be fair) everyone hates him. If he isn’t satisfying a woman, she tends to end up hating him. Besides all of the shit he did before, he did just pay for all of the furniture that’s gonna get put in your house.

It’s truly not lost on you just how important you are to him.

“I mean...what do you wanna do?”

“I wanna pretend that my birthday didn’t happen. I want to pretend that I’m not hurt and that I can live in my new home with him, because he is home to me. I want to be with him, but I don’t trust him, Dais, and part of me doesn’t feel as important to him as he says I am.”

“I can’t believe I’m about to say this, but have you really looked at it from Ransom’s point of view? It’s easy to be mad at him, trust me, I wanna break his nose too, but it’s also Ransom. Hes never had a real friend, never been in a real relationship, and his family fucking sucks. You think he understood that not was the worst option?”

“He told me everything else-”

“He told you everything else because, in his eyes, it held value. He’s always loved you, so of course he was gonna tell you. If he truly didn’t care about your happiness, he would’ve said something at your wedding. Yeah, he loses points for not telling you exactly when Jack started cheating again, but at least he told you. It can be easy to say that he did it for his own self interest, but I told you years ago, I saw how he looked at you. That man has truly been in love with you forever. Once he had an even playing ground, he told you. The bet was vulgar and disrespectful, but it’s Ransom. He’s a fucking idiot.”

“So you think I should be with him?”

“I think...I think that it’s hard for me to see you like this. You didn’t tell me about him for a year, which you can still go fuck yourself for, but once you did, it was easy for me to connect the dots. He makes you happier than I’ve ever seen before, and you are so in love with him. You were never this in love with Jack, and I don’t think you ever would’ve been, even if you two would have worked out. You laugh and smile more when you’re with him, it’s clear that he gets and understands you more than anyone else, you threw all your morals out the window and you don’t do that for just anyone, and you love him. You are so painfully in love with him.

This man got his shit together for you, actually started taking things seriously for you, and stopped all his partying bullshit. Even now, when he’s rarely at a club, he’s there just to drink. Whenever a woman even looks his way, he moves to a new spot. You gave him your attention and he changed almost over night. My list of reasons for not liking him, as well as everyone else’s reasons, don’t apply to you. You are the only person Ransom has actually tried to be good enough for, and I know that deep down inside, you believe that.”

“How much did you hate saying all of that?”

“So much more than I’ll ever be able to explain,” she laughs and you laugh along with her. “Also, you getting him to buy all your furniture? Bad ass!”

“I didn’t get him to do anything. He wouldn’t listen to me when I told him not to. He just kept buying things, so I eventually told him what to buy, cause it’s my house and I’ll be dammed if looks Ransom’s vacation home,” you scowl.

“You are right. You need time alone to figure all of this shit out, but I do believe that he actually loves you. If there’s one thing you should take solace in, it’s that he actually loves you.”

“I don’t know. I just need time,” you sigh.

**

It’s been two months since you’ve last seen Ransom, and you’re proud to say that you’ve given into Ransom once.

Well...physically anyway.

It’d been two weeks since you’d last seen him, and you had just received the new lingerie set he’d sent you to replace the one he destroyed that night you two stayed over at your new house. You were already a few glasses of wine in, so you were emotional and vulnerable to say the least. You were alone and didn’t see the harm in that being the only thing you wore around the house. The playlist you randomly selected didn’t do anything to help. Every song was either about heartbreak, true love, fucking your partner senseless, and so on.

All of your thoughts effortlessly went back to him.

To make matters worse, every bit of furniture in the house made you think of, him, since he was the person who purchased all of it. As every second went by, you found yourself missing Ransom more and thinking more and more about that night. All you wanted was to feel his love, his embrace, and him deep inside of you.

By your 6th glass of wine, you’d thrown all caution to the wind.

The voices that were telling you ‘no’ didn’t stand a chance as you got on your bed and took your Scioness sucking and licking clitoral stimulator out. No, that wasn’t anything new, but recording yourself and sending it to Ransom was. You didn’t stop until you soaked the flimsy material and you were in a whimpering and desperate mess.

You barely had to wait all of three minutes before he responded with, ‘you desperate little fucking slut.’

You knew you should’ve turned him away when you opened your door to him, 15 minutes later, but it was useless. Drunk or not, Ransom had been all you thought about from the moment you got out of his car when he dropped you back off at Daisy’s, and you didn’t feel like denying yourself anymore.

“You tell me to leave you alone, but you send me shit like that? You expect me to not act on what we both want?” he husked with a slight slur as kicked your door shut, then pinned you against the wall.

Of course the both of you are drunk.

“I miss you so much, daddy,” you sobbed as he bit and kissed all over your neck.

“Daddy misses you too, Sweet Thing. Ya know, I didn’t even have to jerk myself off to that video. You’re the sexiest fucking little whore! Did you know that, baby? Watching you soak those little fucking panties...came so fucking hard!” he taunted as he gripped your thighs and hoisted you up.

“You did, daddy?” you whimpered as you wrapped your legs around his waist. “Am I still your favorite?”

“I’ll be more than happy to show you just how desperate I am to make you believe that.”

He’d only been in the house the one other time, but he maneuvered up the stairs to your bedroom with ease. His touch was urgent as he ripped off your panties and matching top, but there was also a gentleness to it. As his lips ghosted over your shoulder, his fingers skillfully trailed down your body. Every feeling you’d been craving and needing since the last time you saw him, finally felt satisfied, and he’d barely done anything to you yet.

“You’ve been on my mind since the last time I saw you,” he husked as he sat up and removed his shirt. “Your scent, your kiss, your smile...this perfect fucking cunt,” he smirked devilishly and you whimpered as you ground your hips against his. “Awh, don’t be so fucking desperate, Sweet Thing,” he taunted with a faux pout as he started to tease your clit, “you know how much daddy loves it when you make him work for it.”

“Need you...need you too much,” you sobbed as you worked on the front of his shorts. “I’m yours, Ransom! Please!” you begged, finally able to pull down his shorts.

“Tell me how bad you need me,” he demanded as he slid two fingers inside of you, but it sounded more like he was begging, and you let out a soft gasp. “C’mon, Sweet Thing! Tell daddy how much you need him!’ “Fuck! You’re all I think about...all I dream of...fuck!”

“Tell me more, Sweet Thing!” he demanded pathetically as his thumb started making little circles on your clit.

“Best...best days were spent...oh my GOD! Best days were spent with you!” you mewled as you tried to push him away, feeling way too stimulated. “Ransom...please!”

“I need you, Sweet Thing!”

“Fuck, I need you too! Can’t....can’t think straight...without you! I love you so much!”

“Jesus, give me what I want!” he demanded as he picked up his pace.

You screamed his name as you held on to his arms for dear life, doing your best to focus your attention on him as your orgasm overtook you. He always made you feel so light and happy, and that night was no different. He finger fucked you through your high, a look of pure satisfaction sat on his face as he watched come down, before he finally pulled his fingers out. He teased you by lightly tracing them over lips, but laughed as you whimpered in protest when he quickly took them back and cleaned them off himself.

“Daddy’s so sorry, Sweet Thing,” he groaned as he thrust himself inside of you.

It didn’t matter that you’d had him so many times before, you still weren’t used to the size of him and how he deliciously split you apart.

“Shit!”

“So fucking beautiful when you’re stuffed full of daddy’s fat cock, baby!” he cooed as he fucked into you hard and fast.

“Oh...fuck..!”

“Taking daddy so well, just like always!”

“So...so full! AHT! RIGHT THERE, DADDY!” you screamed as you dug your nails into his biceps. “FEELS SO GOOD WHEN YOU....FUCK!”

He didn’t slow down as he dipped down to kiss you, one had planted firmly by your head, while the other cupped your face as he deepened the kiss. His touch was always so gentle when it came to you, even when the sex wasn’t. Yeah, he loved to treat you like his little rag doll, but it’s always been obvious that he needed you to believe that you’re more than that to him.

Hes always needed you to know that you’re everything to him.

“I need you, Sweet Thing,” he whispered once you two broke apart, his hand traveled from your face to extremely sensitive bundle of nerves and started to tease it.

“SHIT!” you gasped, curling your toes as clenched your eyes shut.

“Eyes on daddy, Sweet Thing,” he pleaded as he started to kneed your clit softly between his fingers.

“OH FUCK!”

“Eyes on daddy, baby! Wanna watch you...FUCK!”

“Daddy...DADDY PLEASE! Too good! TOO MUCH!!” you cried, opening your eyes as you gripped the sheets tight within your fists. “CAN’T!”

“Give it to me, Sweet Thing! Give me everything!”

“FUCK!” you screamed as your legs gripped down on him tight, and you made a mess that covered both his lower abdomen and yourself.

“Can’t get enough,” he husked as he filled you with his love.

You both stilled, no sounds other than your labored breaths, and you knew you should’ve sent him home. You knew that you’d done enough damage, but that did nothing to stop you from saying what what was truly in your heart.

“I need more, daddy,” you breathed as you ran your hands through his sweaty brown tendrils.

“I’ll give you whatever you want,” he promised before he kissed you passionately.

You two stayed up for hours that night. Both of you ignoring the fact it wouldn’t resolve anything, and that you both were feeding into something you shouldn’t. It didn’t help that you both kept telling each other how much you love and needed one another. When all was said and done, he held you close and tight and peppered kisses up and down your neck, begging you to take him back. The best you could respond with was entwining your fingers with his and squeezing tight.

Fucking is a lot easier than forgiving.

When you woke up the next day, he was gone and if it hadn’t been for the ache between your thighs (and in your ass), you would’ve been able to pretend it was all a dream. You wanted to text him and ask him to come over so you could talk, but talk about what? You hadn’t come to a decision, you weren’t sure that you’d forgiven him, and another round of sex wouldn’t do either of you any good.

But you missed him. You missed him so much.

So, when he FaceTimed you that night, you answered. It wasn’t a deep and meaningful conversation, but it helped to kill the loneliness...for the most part. From then on, you two talked on the phone and FaceTimed every other night. Sometimes they ended with heavy breathing and him begging you to let him over, but you didn’t cave. Other times, you stayed on the phone with him until you fell asleep. Sometimes you’d wake up and the call or FaceTime would still be going on, and it made you feel so much less alone.

You keep telling yourself that taking Ransom back isn’t the worst thing in the world, but you also know it’s bullshit. Yes, you do love him, but he hurt you. He lied and decided to keep important information from you, so that he could get his way. You’d given him the benefit of the doubt before and for what? What did you get from it? A broken heart? You second guessing everything you did?

What happens if you trust him again? You already know his parents hate you (mainly Linda because she’s now dealing with another family scandal because of Ransom), your parents hate him, you’ll second guess every word that comes out of his mouth, and you know the stares will be constant. You cheated with Ransom and, according to Daisy, people have pieced everything together. To make the situation worse, Jack is singing his little sad song to anyone who will listen. It doesn’t seem to matter that he cheated first, long before you even started to catch on. Ransom and Jack were supposed to be best friends, and you’re the reason they aren’t anymore.

So many reason to say no and start over, but it’s not enough for you to actually do it.

Obviously, the whole thing wasn’t traditional or romantic, but you were truly happy. Ransom makes you laugh, makes you feel seen and heard, he loves you, you feel safe with him, your heart rate still speeds up at just the thought of him, every part of you yearns for him in the most desperate and pathetic ways, and the only time you don’t feel alone is when he’s by your side.

The man also always sends into the most mind-numbing blissed out state every time you two make love.

It’s all so heartbreaking and confusing, and you wish there was an easy answer, but you know there can’t be. If you take him back, you’ll live in a constant state of anxiety. If you move on without him, you know that no one will ever be able to fill the void that’s in your heart now.

To make matters worse, it’s raining and it’s only making you want Ransom even more. You can’t stop your brain from going back to the last time you two spent a rainy day together, and small sad smile comes to your face.

“Come back to bed,” Ransom whined as you made your way out of the bathroom and back into his bedroom.

“I have to go,” you laughed softly, “I’ve been here all day.”

“So there’s no reason you can’t stay all night.”

“Ransom-”

“Come here,” he demanded gently while a devilish grin tugged on his lips.

You didn’t even think of disobeying him, because your body was always on autopilot when it came to him. You crawled onto the bed and made your way over to him slowly, loving the desire and happiness that burned in his eyes, and didn’t stop until you were straddling him.

“Take your shirt off,” he instructed as his hands ghosted over your bare thighs.

His eyes followed your every move, and it made your heart swell to see him so enamored and obsessed with you. He’d seen you naked a handful of times, but it didn’t seem to phase him. To him, your beauty was something that would always take his breath away.

“Are you happy?” he asked as his hands traveled over your frame. “You seem happy.”

“I’m really happy, baby.”

“I wanna take you away again.”

“Ransom-”

“I miss having you all to myself. I love having you all to myself.”

“I do too, baby.”

“I love you, Y/N.”

“I love you too.”

“Stay. Please just stay with me. We can do whatever you want,” he offered as he wrapped his arms around your waist. “You wanna watch some cartoon? We can do that. You wanna make love for the rest of the day? We can do that too. Eat junk, sit in silence, play board games, literally anything you want. Just stay here.”

“I’m sure you can find someone else to fill your time.”

“You know there’s no one else. There’s only you.”

“Ransom-”

“Sweet Thing, you want to be here, so just be here.”

“I have to go back at some point.”

“No you don’t,” he scowled, “but, if you must, leave tomorrow. Today is the perfect day for us to be together.”

“What do you wanna do?”

“I wanna keep making you happy. I love making you happy,” he smirked as he started to rub your clit.

“Ransom!”

“You wanna watch a movie, baby?”

“I just wanna stay with you!”

“I want you to stay with me forever, Sweet Thing.”

“Oh God! Ransom!”

“So fucking beautiful,” he cooed as he quickened his pace.

“It feels...Ransom! It’s too much!”

“You already know what you have to say to get me to let you cum, Sweet Thing,” he smirked as he easily sunk two fingers into your desperate pussy.    

“RANSOM!”

“Tell me you’ll stay,” he begged desperately.

“Pl...please!”

“Not until you tell me that you’ll stay, Sweet Thing.”

“Fuck! I’ll stay! I’ll stay for as long as you want!”

“Careful, Sweet Thing,” he smirked, “you’re gonna end up staying forever.”

“Ransom!”

“Cum for me, sweet angel. You always look so fucking beautiful when you do.”

“Fuck, I love you so much!” you whimpered as you coated his fingers and his wrist. “Such a fucking bully,” you breathed after a moment and he chuckled.

“I only use my magic powers when you’re being stubborn,” he smirked as he pulled you close and kissed you passionately. “What do you wanna do?” he questioned while removing his fingers from your cunt, placing them between both your lips and his.

“Well, right now, I want you to use me up until you’re satisfied,” you whispered before licking his fingers with the tip of your tongue, “then I want us to make lunch and watch movies.”

“All of that is doable,” he promised as he shoved his fingers in your mouth.

You two spent what felt like forever underneath the covers, getting lost in one another, before finally getting out of bed and showering together.

“Ransom, do you ever go grocery shopping?” you laughed, looking in his fridge for anything to make.

“I mean, I send someone to go grocery shopping, but I’ve been slacking,” he admitted as he grabbed two glasses from the cabinet.

“And why is that...babe, these apples should’ve been thrown out weeks ago,” you laughed, taking them out and placing them on the counter.

“If you’re not here, there’s not really much of a reason for me to cook.”

“You can’t just order out all the time, honey. You have to take care of yourself.”

“I just...it doesn’t matter.”

“Talk to me, babe. What’s on your mind?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Why are you shutting me out?”

“I’m not, it’s just...its never mattered before, so why should it matter now?”

“Because I love you and I want to be there for you like you are with me.”

“That’s why you’re still with Jack?”

“Ransom.”

“I’m sorry...really, I am. That was a low blow...it doesn’t matter.”

“Baby,” you sighed, making your way over to him and wrapped your arms around his waist, “let me in. Talk to me.”

“I just don’t see the fucking point,” he scowled, turning his head away from you. “I’m not trying to guilt trip you, but without you, what’s the point? What’s the point of any of this?”

“Ransom-”

“No one cares, except for you. No one checks in, no one calls to see if I’m okay, no one really gives a fuck whether I’m stable or not unless they want something from me, my family always expects the worst of me, because all of us are terrible people...what’s the point? Without you, what is the point?”

“My sweet, sweet love,” you cooed as you cupped his face, “you live for you, not them. It doesn’t matter how they view you, it only matters how you view yourself.” “We both know I’m not worth saving.”

“I don’t.”

“Y/N-”

“I love you, Ransom. I love you so much that it terrifies me. It’s not lost on me what you’re capable of, but you let me in. You let me see the parts of you that hide from everyone else. The parts that you’re scared of everyone else seeing. Yeah, your family sucks, but you’re not them. You don’t have to keep acting the way they expect you to.”

“I’ll make something of myself and then what? Make them proud? Make myself something else for them to make a profit off of?”

“Like I said before: you live for you, not them.”

“I live for you.”

“You can’t make me your whole world, Ransom.”

“It doesn’t change the fact that you are.”

“What would you do if I do if I didn’t love you?”

“The same shit I’ve been doing,” he laughed humorlessly.

“That’s no way to live, Hugh.”

“Because there’s so much more to live for?”

“Live a life you’re proud of. No matter what your family says or does, no matter what you’ve done in your past, live a life you’re proud of.”

“Are you proud of me?”

“I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t. It’s not about me though, it’s about-”

“Its always been about you, Sweet Thing. From the moment I laid eyes on you...its always been about you.”

“I love you, Ransom.”

“I love you, Y/N,” he smiled before he dipped down to kiss you.

You ended up having groceries delivered to his house, and you both cooked together in a happy silence. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of you as danced around the kitchen in his white collar button down, and were obsessed with every kiss he surprised you with.

You made chicken and rice quesadillas, and ate them while sitting on the kitchen floor with him. Yes, he objected to it, but you were more than happy to remind him that it’s okay to not be prim and proper all the damn time. It’s perfectly fine to let your hair down every once in a while.

“You have to pick a movie,” you laughed before you took a bite of your last quesadilla slice.

“You’re the one who suggested watching a movie!”

“No I didn’t! Plus, you know I hate making the choice!”

“I think you’re the most annoying person I’ve ever met,” he smiled, his ocean blue eyes blossomed in excitement as you burst out laughing.

“Pick a movie!”

“I don’t know! I guess...’Casablanca’.”

“You don’t even like that movie!”

“How about...’The Nightmare Before Christmas’?”

“You hate that movie!”

“But its one of your favorites,” he smiled at you.

“Ransom-”

“I love what you love.”

“Does the mean you’re finally gonna love yourself?”

“Don’t be annoying,” he warned with a glare.

“Love yourself as much as you love me.”

“That’s not physically possible, even I was in a good head space. The way that I love you...the amount that you love me...I could never love myself that much.”

“Is it sad that I feel the same way?”

“I think it speaks to how much we need each other,” he smiled towards you.

You spent the entire movie in his lap, with him holding you close and pressing soft kisses into your hair. Afterwords, you both just talked for hours about everything. His childhood, your childhood, past traumas, past relationships, what you both love each other, and you’re reservations about starting a relationship (you more than him). At the end of the night, Ransom decided he wanted to finish off the night with his head between your legs, which of course led to an all night love making session, that resulted in you sleeping in. A small smile coming to your face when you woke up in his arms, while he was in the middle of a business call.

The whole thing felt like a dream.

Fast forward to now, where all you want to do is ask Ransom to come over, but you know it’ll only make things worse. Ransom has begging you to let him come and see you for the last two weeks, but you can’t trust or control yourself around him, so you tell him no. You see it every night in his eyes when you two FaceTime, but this is the only solution that works for now.

With a heavy sigh, you get up off the sofa, and decide that food will be your way out of your misery. You’re almost at your kitchen when you hear a rather hard knock on your door. You stand there for a moment, contemplating letting whoever it is, before another rapid knock has you scowling in sheer irritation and making your way to your front door.

You should’ve ignored it.

“Jesus, what do you want?” you mutter once the open door reveals a pretty wet Jack.

“Hello to you too.”

“Jack, I’m really not in the mood today, so please-”

“So you’ll take Drysdale back, but you won’t even hear me out?”

“I haven’t taken anyone back-”

“Marta was crying at the bar to one of her friends about how she came over to talk to him about the company, and you were wrapped in a blanket and he was naked.”

“We had sex, Jack. That’s all. I’m very much single and not seeing anyone. Not like it’s any of your business.”

“I just wanna talk, Y/N. I’m not here to argue or raise hell. I just wanna talk, because we never actually got a chance to. If you can hear Drysdale out, you can hear me out too.”

“Ransom didn’t beat the shit out of me.”

“You know I’m sorry about that.”

“And the lies you’ve been spreading about me?”

“If you’ll just let me explain myself....please,” he begs pathetically.

It’s not like he deserves it, but you do have questions of your own.

“The moment I feel uncomfortable or fed up, you’re out of here,” you sigh as you step aside.

“I just wanna talk, I promise,” he tells you as he makes his way inside.

“The house is nice,” he compliments softly as he looks around.

“What did you want to say, Jack?” you question as you make your way to the kitchen.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I really am, for all of it-”

“You could’ve sent all of that in a text.”

“I loved you. I love you. I just...my Mom never left my dad, and I figured we’d just make it work. My parents stayed together, your parents stayed together, Ransom’s parents-”

“So you just assumed that a toxic environment was okay?”

“I expected you to wait,” he sighs in pure disappointment, stopping at the entry way of your kitchen.

“That’s bullshit and we both know,” you scoff, crossing your arms and leaning against the counter. “You knew my parents were always going to push me to stay, so you took advantage of that. You never loved me, you loved the idea of loving me and took my love for granted, because you thought it would always be there.”

“Because you were so innocent in all of this?!”

“Jack, you started cheating years before I did! I begged you for a divorce and you refused to give me one! No, I’m not innocent, but I refuse to take the blame for everything that went wrong!”

“You didn’t do anything to try and fix-”

“No! You don’t get to yell at me and make me feel like shit! After all the work I did, it still wasn’t enough for you! Yeah, I slept with Ransom, I went away with him, I fell in love with him, but don’t act like I didn’t try to do everything to make you happy! You didn’t want a wife! You wanted a play to-”

“You were all too happy to be Ransom’s!”

“You’re the one who made the bet!”

“Because I thought you’d stay, no matter what!”

“BECAUSE YOU DIDN’T APPRECIATE ME!”

Jack is thoughtful before looking at you and saying, “I do love you, Y/N. Yes, it started as a bet, and I know it was wrong, but I do love you. I always thought...it’s all I’ve ever known. No, it’s not right, but that doesn’t make the mindset any easier to break itself out of. It started out as a bet, a cruel joke, but you made me love you. Beauty aside, you truly were everything I had ever wanted, I think you’re what mot of us want, honestly. I just...I got lost in all of the bullshit-”

“All of the bullshit I paid for.”

“I make my own money!”

“Your own money that you never spent! I foot the bill for all the shit you did!”

“Didn’t stop you from giving Ransom-”

“You don’t get to bring him up like he started all of this! Whatever I did with Ransom-”

“Like letting him fuck you on his balcony for everyone to see-”

“Where you yelled that you needed to get a whore just like that!” you snap. “Everything I did for Ransom, sexually and otherwise, I would’ve done for you! You shut me out and let this marriage fail! And for all the lies you’ve told-”

“You couldn’t really expect a clean-”

“YOU CHEATED ON ME!” you scream at him. “You cheated, you lied, manipulated me, embarrassed me, BEAT me, made me feel terrible about myself,” you trail off with a small sob as you wipe your eyes. “No, I shouldn’t have cheated, but it’s not like you gave me much incentive to try. There’s honestly no excuse for what you did! All because Ransom had a crush-”

“HE GETS EVERYTHING HE WANTS!”

“Do you even hear yourself right now?! How much of a fucking child you sound like?! Besides, what the fuck did I ever do to you?! You approached me! I’d never even spoken to you and you went out of your way to rope me into this bullshit! You made me fall in love with a version of you that doesn’t even exist-”

“That’s not true!”

“Yes it is! All of the charm, all of the kindness, all of the thoughtfulness was just a lie! All of it! It took you all of three months to cheat on me! I don’t believe that there’s single part of you that actually knows how to love and respect me, or anyone for that matter! I begged you for a divorce, multiple times, and you refused! It wasn’t enough that you won your fucking bet! What you did was cruel and fucking terrible! So yes, I fucked Ransom! I’m not going to feel bad because someone was giving me the affection and love you weren’t!”

“Drysdale isn’t some fucking saint-”

“He’s a hell of a lot better than you! He didn’t start this, you did! He didn’t cheat on me, you did! He didn’t go out of his way to hurt me, but you did! It’s not enough that ruined our marriage, and for the longest time, my fucking self esteem, but somehow I’m still the bad guy in all of this! You’re going out and spreading lies, everyone thinks I’m Ransom’s little whore, and everyone feels bad for you! Yet, you dare come to my home and tell me that your feelings are hurt because I fucked Ransom on a balcony?! Well, guess what? I let him fuck me on a hotel balcony in Chicago! I fucked him at our vow renewal party! I fucked him on our anniversary when you got too fucked up! I had been fucking him for over a year by the time you even realized something was off! That’s how wound up in yourself you were! You claim that you love me so much, but paid no fucking attention to me! There were nights that I didn’t come home, and you either didn’t care or were out with whoever fascinated you more than me and never even bothered to ask where I was! All of this was just a joke to you! It’s still a joke to you!”

“It’s not! I love-”

“Stop saying that!” you snap, slapping him hard across the face.

He takes a step towards, but you’re quick to raise your hand again, while opening the drawer full of knives, and placing your hand on the handle of the chef knife.

You’ll be dammed if you let him beat you up in your own fucking house.

“I’m a good person, Y/N. I have flaws, but I am a good person. Be with Ransom for all I care, but don’t come crawling back to me when he breaks your fucking heart!”

“I wouldn’t come crawling back to you if someone paid me to. Now, get the fuck out of my house,” you warn, fire in your eyes and scowl on your face.

Jack stands there for a moment, looking you over, before shaking his head and walking out, slamming door shut hard behind him.

You stay still for a moment, starting to shake before the tears start to rapidly fall and you let go of the knife. You blindly search your pockets for your phone, feeling your breathing start to become uneven and ragged.

‘Where the fuck did I put it?!’ you think to yourself as panic overtakes you.

When you get back to your living area, you’re quick to grab it off the arm of the sofa, quickly dialing the number of the only person you can think of.

“Hey, can I call you back? I’m in the middle of a meeting...what’s wrong? Are you okay?” Ransom asks, worry laced in every word, once he hears your sobbing and uneven breaths.

“Ne...nee...,” you sob, frustrated with yourself for not being able to put a sentence together. “Need you...shit!”

“I’m on my way. Are you home?”

“Mhm.”

“I’m on my way,” he promises before hanging up.

You make your way over to the corner nearest you and sit in it, clenching your eyes shut as you try to regulate your breathing and focus on something that calms you. No, you had no clue that seeing Jack would trigger a panic attack, the last one happening maybe a week after Jack beating the shit out of you, but you’re happy you invited him in nonetheless. You didn’t know how much you needed to say all of those things until you saw him, and you’re proud of yourself for standing your ground.

You’re also proud of yourself for slapping the shit out of him.

“Y/N!” Ransom yells as he makes his way into your house.

Of course you forgot to lock the door.

“Y/N, where are-”

“Here,” you squeak, still trying to stop your tears.

“What happened? Are you okay?” Ransom asks as he quickly makes his way to your side. You feel his fingers scanning over you, searching for bruises or scars, and you shake your head ‘no’ in a feeble attempt to tell him that you’re physically fine. “Y/N, what happened?”

“Ransom...please,” you sob as you wrap your arms around him and bury your face in the crook of his neck.

“It’s alright, baby. I’m here and everything is okay, I promise,” he coos softly, wrapping his arms around your waist, before standing up and picking you up.

You instinctively wrap your legs around his waist, doing your best to match your breathing with his heartbeat, slowly calming down as he closes your front door and locks it.

“It’s okay, baby,” he reassures you again gently, softly stroking your back as he makes his way upstairs. “I’m here now and I promise to not let anything happen to you. I’ll keep you safe.”

When he reaches your bedroom, he pulls back the covers and sets you down on your bed gently before getting in next to you, and pulling the covers over the both of you. You take note of his wet hair and you want to apologize for all of this, but you can’t find your voice or the strength. You’re using all the strength you have to hold him close, needing to feel safe and loved.

“Just rest, baby. I’m right here. I’m right here,” he coos into your hair before kissing it.

You finally feel calm enough to rest, the voices and memories in your head finally calming down enough for to start seeing through the fog. As you succumb to unconsciousness, you know one thing for certain: Ransom will always be the only person you’ll ever feel completely safe with.

Ransom will always be the love of your life.

**

3 Weeks Later

“Why do I feel like you’re not having fun?!” Daisy yells over the music, a small pout on her lips, small slur in her words as she tries to steady herself.

“I am!” you lie with a laugh, your own slur apparent as you take note of the fact that your fourth drink is halfway finished.

“You forget that I’ve known you forever! Your eye twitches when you lie! What’s wrong?! Is it because Jack is here?! I can have his ass thrown out!”

“It’s a club, Dais!” you chuckle, taking a sip of your Mai Tai.

“It’s my 31st birthday!”

“It’s not him, I promise! I just haven’t been out in a while! I promise I’m okay!”

“Bullshit, but I’ll leave it alone...for now!” she warns before making her way back to the dance floor and you laugh.

It’s not like you’re not trying to have a good time, but you just miss Ransom. Your mind keeps going back to when you had your panic attack and he came over in an instant. The memory causes your heart to flutter in your chest.

“Tell them I’ll take care of it when I get back,” you heard Ransom softly demand as he typed on his laptop. “Besides, the work on their end isn’t done anyway. If I have to tell them one more fucking time to show me the cover design, people are getting fucking fired....I don’t care! The book is due out in 3 months, and I haven’t seen shit. They want their fucking corrections? Show me a fucking book cover. It’s not that goddamn hard!” he snapped softly before hanging up.

There’s the Ransom you know.

“Did I get you in trouble?” you croaked softly, voice still sore from all the crying.

“Did I wake you? I’m sorry-”

“No no,” you reassured him as you sat up a little, looking around and seeing that was dark. “How long have I been asleep?”

“About three hours. Are you okay?”

“I have a headache,” you told him as you rested your head on his arm and sighed in contentment.

You’d missed him so much.

“I’m sorry I interrupted-”

“Don’t be. I brought you up some water. You should sit up and have some.”

“You didn’t have to stay...I shouldn’t have called-”

“Stop, Y/N. Sit up and have some water,” he urged again and sighed and gave in. “What happened?” he asked as he closed his laptop.

“Jack came over and-”

“HE WHAT?!”

“Ransom, it’s okay. Nothing happened. He wanted me to hear him out, and big surprise, there was nothing to hear. I started yelling, he kept bringing up that I cheated with you, so I of course got angrier and went off on him, I ended up slapping him and he walked towards me like he was gonna hit me back, but I raised my hand again...he told me that he’s a good person with some flaws and that you’re just gonna break my heart before he walked out and slammed the door shut. I don’t know, I guess reliving all of that trauma mentally, watching come towards me as if he wanted to hit me, seeing him...it triggered a panic attack. I hadn’t seen him in so long and it was...I could only think of you,” you confessed softly, too anxious to look up at him.

You had experienced entirely too many emotions in one day.

“You can always call me whenever you need me,” he promised you softly as he stroked your hair.

“No, you don’t have to-”

“I love you, Y/N. I always have and I always will. You think I would put a fucking meeting before you? You think I would put anything before you? You are my world and I’ll always be there for you. No matter what,” he told you sincerely.

Your heart both swelled and broke at his words. You couldn’t help but wonder if he told Marta the exact same thing when he was working to get his share of the inheritance back.

“Can you stay tonight? You being here just calms me and-”

“You don’t have to explain anything to me, Sweet Thing. If it makes you feel better, I’m more than happy to do it,” he assured you softly.

You want so badly to believe every thing he says, but how the hell are you supposed to do that? How are you supposed to turn a blind eye and pretend nothing ever happened when-

“Ya know, you’ve been looking sad all night,” a random man says to you, pulling you out of your thoughts.

“I promise I’m not,” you mutter as you waive the waiter over once you notice that you’ve completely finished off your drink.

“You don’t wanna give Jack the satisfaction of seeing you so unhappy, do you?”

“I’m sorry, do I know-ugh, get away from me, Tyson,” you scowl once you finally turn your full attention to the guy disrupting your evening of sulking.

“C’mon,” he smirks as he strokes your arm, “I know you know how to show a guy a good time, and I’ll be more than happy to show you a good time.” “A guy beats the shit out of me, but I’m labeled a whore for doing the same thing he did to me. Amazing,” you mutter as you roll your eyes.

“Oh, c’mon, honey. I saw you that night on Ransom’s balcony-”

“Leave me alone, Tyson.”

“Don’t be a bitch! Jack said you were an easy fuck-”

“I’m sorry to break it to you, but like he does with everyone else, he fucking lied to you. Now leave me-”

“You know you want it,” he pushes as he grips your arm, tight.

“She said to fuck off, Tyson. I’m pretty sure she fucking meant it,” Ransom snaps, pulling Tyson off of the bar stool next to you. “Fuck off.”

“C’mon Ransom! You can’t just keep her to yourself-”

“She fucking said no! Do you want me to show you what happens when I get pissed the fuck off over someone not listening to her and what she wants?!” he warns in practically a growl.

“You two are fucking pathetic,” Tyson scoffs, “I’ll find some other whore to suck me off, I’m not worried,” he shrugs with a devilish grin.

Ransom lunges towards him but you’re quick to grab his arm, looking up at him with pleading eyes, “please, Ransom. He isn’t worth it.”

Though you can see the fear in his eyes, Tyson tries to mask it before walking off.

“You should’ve let me kill him,” Ransom mutters, taking the seat that belonged to Tyson.

“You can’t beat up every guy who’s mean to me.”

“Only when you’re around.”

“Ransom-”

“Besides, why are you wearing a dress like this when I’m not with you?” he questions, taking a sip of his bourbon as his hungry eyes look you over.

“One,” you start as you turn your attention to your drink, pressing your thighs together because that look always makes you feral, “I didn’t pick out this outfit, Daisy did. Two, you’re not my boyfriend and I don’t have to run everything past you.”

Why do you always bait him? Seriously, at this point, you’re just begging for complication.

“You’ve been avoiding me for a week, and you think you have the right to catch an attitude with me right now?” he questions, leaning in and resting his hand on your bare upper thigh, and your breath hitches. “Don’t forget who you really belong to, Sweet Thing.”

“You...you’ve been seen with women-”

“Don’t. They flirt with me, I don’t flirt with them. I always go home alone, waiting for and wanting you.”

“Ransom-”

“I belong to you just like you belong to me, or did you forget? Did you forget everything I told you? Does daddy need to remind you?” he presses, giving your thigh a firm squeeze.

After he’d come over and stayed with you after your panic attack, you wanted him around all the time, and it was becoming too much for you. You two hadn’t even slept together (you two hadn’t done anything sexual in a while), you just craved to be in his space.

Ransom has made it a point in his life to put up walls and shut everyone out, but with you, he makes you his whole world and that makes it so hard to stay away from him. It’s not that you need him to be all about you all the time, but you’d be a liar if you said that having that kind of effect on him wasn’t something that made you feel just a little special though.

However, it’s so much more than that.

Ransom talks to you. Not at you, but to you. He doesn’t treat you as if you’re some object to just keep his cock warm and entertain him when he’s bored, he takes note of the things you actually like and surprises you with them, he’s gotten a lot better at talking to you about things instead of shutting down, he opens up to you about his childhood and his issues with his parents, his issues with Walt, and the issues he had with Harlan.

He doesn’t only call you when he wants sex and he respects your wishes when you say no, he calls you when he’s upset and lets you in, he calls when he’s lonely and just wants to hear your voice, he calls when something good actually happens and wants you to know immediately, he calls to ask about your day, he calls when he’s worried about you.

Never in a million years would you have thought of Ransom as someone who can be gentle and kind, and with the way he talks to people who aren’t you, you still can’t see him that way at times, but when given a chance, he truly can be. It’s understandable that after being around shitty people all your life, you become a product of your environment, but all Ransom ever wanted was for someone to listen to him and not treat him like some trinket.

That’s what everyone wants, but you definitely need it as a child.

Perhaps, if it had happened before everything else, all of this would be a lot fucking easier get past. Maybe it wouldn’t have happened at all. However, the fact of the matter is that he did lie and he broke your heart. Sure, he says that you’re not just another Marta to him, but if he made two bets concerning you, how the hell are you supposed to believe him now? How are you supposed to believe that he’s not just trying to string you along until he’s bored?

However, none of that really matters at the moment. Right now, both you and Ransom are drunk, touch starved, and desperate for each other.In this moment, all that matters to you is holding on to your resolve, which isn’t going well at all.

“Ransom, don’t fucking st-start...holy shit,” you sigh softly as his hands travels upward.

“Don’t fucking what, Sweet Thing? You’re opening your legs up for me, so I know you don’t want me to stop,” he smirks as he uses two fingers to push your panties to the side before starting to stroke your clit.

“Fuck!” you sigh softly as Ransom leans in close.

“Do you know how many times daddy has watched that video you sent? The one where you soak your panties?”

“Ransom-”

“Every single morning and every single fucking night,” he coos before biting the shell of your ear.

“Not here,” you pant softly, even though you desperately want it.

“ ‘Not here’ what, baby?” he taunts, using two fingers to spread your lips apart before easily sliding them inside of you.

“Daddy!” you cry softly, gripping the sides of your chair tight as you try and hang on.

You feel Jack’s eyes on you without even looking his way, and you know he knows what you two are up to.

Hell, anyone in close proximity more than likely knows.

“You keep making me wait and for what? You know you miss me being stuffed deep inside-”

“Daddy...please!” you beg as he curls his fingers. “You know...it’s too much, daddy!”

“At least you’re finally remembering your manners,” he chuckles softly. “So pathetic...you’re my little whore, aren’t you?”

“I’m anything you want me to be, please! Just let me...aht!”

“Don’t make a scene, Sweet Thing,” he chuckles darkly. “Should I fuck you in front of everyone like I did on my balcony that night? Does everyone need a fucking reminder that you’re mine?”

“Daddy please,” you whimper as you clench around him.

“You’ve got me so fucking hard right now, Sweet Thing. I swear to God!” he growls before biting down on your shoulder. “Go ahead, tell daddy how much you want it!”

“Need it! I need you so much!”

“Cum, like the good little girl you are, and then we’re gonna go back to my place so daddy can remind you why it’s in your best interest to behave.”

The fact that you don’t scream when you cum hard has you both shocked, because it definitely is enough to soak the little part of your dress that you’re still sitting on.

“Did so good,” he taunts “came so hard without making too much of a mess,” he chuckles as he slowly removes his fingers. “Now, clean me up and we’ll get out of here,” he snaps, shoving his fingers into your mouth while pulling his wallet out with his free hand.

You don’t even try to stop the moan that leaves your mouth as the bar tender comes over and takes Ransom’s card. Once you finish using your tongue to clean him off, you know the look you’re giving him is that of pure lust and desire, and the shit-eating grin that’s on his face only confirms that.

“We’re leaving-”

“Daisy,” you quickly interrupt, vaguely remembering why you left your house in the first place.

“You want to bring her?”

“No,” you laugh softly, “it’s her birthday. I came out for her-”

“Look at her, Sweet Thing. Do you really think she has any intention of leaving with you tonight?” he laughs as he motions to her on the dance floor, grinding between two guys while making-out with one of them.

So much for your saving grace.

“No, you’re gonna come home with me tonight, let me use you how I want to, and then-”

“You two are fucking sick,” Jack growls as he approaches the both of you.

Apparently, the alcohol has everyone feeling loose tonight.

“Back off,” Ransom warns as he stands in front you.

“She’ll always be-”

“She was never yours. The way she’d beg for me in her sleep, the fact that she never wanted to fuck you after sleeping with me, the fact that she never opened up to you like she opened up to me-”

“She’s just a slut and you’re just a piece of shit-”

“I’d advise you to use better manners when you talk about her in front of me,” Ransom warns, gripping Jack’s throat before throwing him against the bar.

“Ransom!” you yell as everyone turns their attention towards the scene.

“You stay away from her, understand me?” he warns, completely ignoring your pleas and cries. “No more calls, texts, impromptu visits, nothing. The divorce is final, she wants nothing to do with you, all of the assets have been split, so this is the last time you speak to her or me for that matter. Is that understood?”

“Ransom-”

“Do you understand me?!” he questions, gripping Jack’s neck tighter.

“You’ll fuck this up, just like you do everything else in your life,” Jack coughs, a sick smile playing on his lips.

Ransom doesn’t hesitate before landing a blow with his right fist.

“Ransom!”

“This is the last time I’m gonna be nice about it,” warns, throwing Jack down and taking a step back. “Stay the fuck away from her.”

Ransom’s quick to throw cash down on the bar and grab his card, before taking your hand and pulling you behind him as he storms out.

If there was any fight left in you to tell him no, it’s sure as shits gone now.

“Fuck!” you whimper as Ransom shoves you against the wall the moment he closes the door to his house.

The entire car ride, he was fingering you and telling you all of the dirty things he had in store for you the second you got into his house.

“Can’t wait to have to begging and screaming all night in my fucking bed. Missed you so fucking much,” he husks, hoisting you up and forcing your legs around his waist.

“Daddy please!” you beg as you fumble with his belt and undo his pants.

“When did you become so pathetic, baby? Hmm? I know you love daddy’s dick, but you’ve never never begged like this before,” he chuckles darkly as he rips your panties off of you.

“Been so fucking long, daddy!”

“And whose fault is that?” he questions as he thrusts two fingers inside of you.

“MINE! IT’S ALL MY FAULT, DADDY!”

“I’ve barely even done anything to you,” he growls darkly as he picks up his pace. “Have you learned your lesson? Are you gonna stop denying daddy what’s his?” he broods as he curls his fingers inside your tight little cunt and picks up his pace, teasing your clit with light circles with his thumb.

“Anything...anything you want, daddy!”

“Cum for me you little fucking slut! Cum hard for daddy!”

It’s not like you need much coaxing.

“All that cream for me and I haven’t even rubbed the tip of my cock against your fucking pussy? You really are the most pathetic little thing, aren’t you?” he chuckles as he pulls his two fingers from your pussy.

“I need you to fill me up, please! I need it!” you whimper, forcing his pants down. “You promised to fill me up!”

“Anyone else been in this perfect little snatch?” he grunts, sinking you down on his cock.

You whine, grinding your hips against his,“fuck! No...only want you! I always want you!”

“God, you’re needy tonight, Sweet Thing,” he chuckles condescendingly. “Did you wanna fuck Tyson tonight?”

“No daddy! No one ever has my attention! No one...no one except...you!”

“Good girl,” he praises as he grips your throat and starts rutting into relentlessly.

“Aht! Please..yes!”

“This is what you need, baby? To fucked hard and fast? Like the little slut you are?”

The only response you can muster is garbled and something between a whimper and a moan.

“This is the only time I’m gonna take it easy on you, so you better fucking thank me after I let you cum on my cock,” he warns as he starts kneading your clit with his knuckles.

“Fuck!”

You gasp and try to push his hand away, but he isn’t having that, “did I tell you to do that?” he growls gripping your throat tighter as tears start to well in your eyes. “Awh, those pretty tears for me?” he coos, licking one of them with just the tip of his tongue. “Still taste so fucking good!”

“Daddy...so full! Feels too good! Please!”

“You can still remember your manners? Guess daddy is gonna have to work all night to fuck you stupid, Sweet Thing,” he smirks, angling himself he hits that part deep within you that has you seeing stars.

“HOLY FUCK!”

“C’mon, give daddy what’s his,” he begs “give me what I need!”

You scream out his name as dig your nails into his shoulders, panting as you involuntarily grind your hips against him, your body spasms a bit as Ransom rides out your high.

God, if that was him taking it easy on you, you honestly don’t know if you’re gonna be able to last the rest of the night.

“Get on your knees and clean daddy off,” he demands roughly, pulling out and setting you down, and you don’t need to be told twice.

You whine at the sight in front of you; his proud angry red cock standing at attention, your essence dripping off it, and twitching just a little. The moment you get your mouth on him, you moan in satisfaction, eager to take as much of him as possible.

“Always such a good girl for me,” he groans, gripping your hair tight. “Now, hold still while daddy fucks your face like the little rag doll that you are,” he instructs in an authoritative tone that makes you clench around nothing.

You barely have time to get prepare yourself before Ransom starts roughly face fucking you. The last time you two did this, Jack was having friends over and you two almost got caught because Ransom couldn’t wait to get you upstairs...or for later that night.

Jack came into the kitchen looking for the good bottle of vodka just as Ransom had tucked himself back into his pants. Since your mascara was running down your face (courtesy of pleasure tears), Ransom made it seem as if he was consoling you about something. It’s not like Jack really seemed to care, which is why you didn’t feel the slightest bit of guilt when you snuck out and stayed up all night with Ransom later that night.

In fact, you’re more than sure you look the same way right now.

“Missed this fucking mouth...always taking my cock....so fucking well! “

You blink back tears as your hand travels down between your legs and starts to massage your clit.

“Forgot just how much you love being my little fuck toy. Daddy didn’t tell you to play with yourself, did I?”

You look up at him with pleading eyes, begging for mercy. Besides, it’s not like he’s not about to keep you up teaching you lessons on why you should behave.

“Fuck, alright, get yourself off. Fuck that little snatch and make a mess. Daddy’s gonna fill your little whore mouth!”

With a pathetic, gargled moan, you squirt hard, trying to maintain contain as you felt your release drip down your thighs.

“Christ!” he growls, filling your mouth his warm seed and moan in satisfaction, realizing just how much you missed his taste. “Open,” demands gruffly, breathing heavy as he tries to keep control of the situation.

You’ll be shocked if you two ever make it to the bed.

You open wide, some of his release trickling down your chin, and he slaps his cock against your tongue.

“Fucking swallow,” he demands, grabbing your shoulder and yanking you upwards.

He gives you half a second to do as you’re told before he’s picking you up, and forcing your legs around him again. You grip him tight as he pins you against the wall and kisses you passionately.

“Daddy’s tired of sleeping without you, Sweet Thing,” he broods, peppering sloppy wet kisses along your jawline.

“Please...please don’t!” you mewl, tugging at his shirt, trying to pull it up and off of him.

“Making daddy spend all these nights alone, taking care of myself...” he presses, getting his hands on the front of your dress and ripping it open, “fuck!”

“So lonely without you!”

“Yeah? Why is that, sweet girl?”

“Love you, daddy! I love you so much!”

“And you’re gonna spend all night showing me just how much,” he smirks before wrapping his arms around you waist and whisking you away upstairs.

You wish you could turn it off. How much you love him, how much you crave him, and how much you’ve come to desire every bit of his existence. It’s not healthy, the little dance you two do, but having part of him is better than having none of him. When everything first started, it was easy to say that it’s just sex (because it really was for you), but Ransom worked his way into your heart. Even on nights like tonight, when the sex is pure filth and not romantic in the slightest, just the feel of him is enough to make all the noise in your head stop.

The way he kisses, takes care of every part of your body, worships every part of your body, the things he says, the way he holds you...it’s impossible for you not to give in to him. You know that when you wake up in the morning, you’ll be at war with yourself just like you always are after you give in to him, but you just can’t be bothered to care about that right now. Not when he has you right where you always want to be.

“Pussy is too fucking good, Sweet Thing!” Ransom grunts, fucking you hard from behind as you claw at the bed.

You honestly don’t know how long you two have been going at it, and you lost count of the positions he had you in after the handcuffs broke. It’s not like you didn’t know that you’d missed every single part of him, but it helped to ease the pain a little that came with trying to be strong for yourself. However, the moment he came near you at the bar, your body and soul desperately craved him.

To get lost in the never ending dramatic mystery that is Hugh Ransom Drysdale.

“Please...can’t...I need to-”

“Need it, Sweet Thing! Daddy needs you to soak the bed. I haven’t had you like this in so long...I need it, baby! I love you so much! Please!”

You don’t mean to cry out as loud as you do as your final orgasm of the night washes over you, but it’s probably one of the most (if not the most) euphoric orgasms you’ve ever had. Everything fades around you for a moment and you feel as if you’re on a cloud that’s being charged by the most pleasurable sparks that set every part of your body alight in the most pleasurable way.

Ransom’s pornographic yell of your name is what brings you back to reality as you feel the mix of your juices run down your leg.

“You did so good tonight, Sweet Thing,” Ransom praises softly as he pulls out, catching you right before you collapse onto the bed. “You okay, baby?”

“Mhm,” you nod, trying to get yourself as close to him as possible, not even caring that the both of you need to shower. “I love you.”

“Take me back.”

“Lets not do this tonight,” you yawn, laying your head on his chest as he throws a cover over the both of you.

“You won’t answer me and you won’t see me-”

“Ransom-”

“We can make this work. You’re just as miserable as I am-”

“I don’t trust you.”

“It’s not keeping you away.” “Tonight doesn’t count, honey.”

“I’ll take you away again.”

“You can’t just take me away every time you want to fix things between us,” you giggle, eyes still closed as you make little circles on his chest with your pointer finger.

“Just say yes.”

“Ransom-”

“Do you love me?”

“You know that I do.”

“Then say yes.”

“It won’t fix everything.”

“But it’ll help with some things.”

“Ransom-”

“Getting out of this hell will help. We need time away and to clear our heads.”

“I don’t even know where we would go.”

“I do, you just have to say yes.”

“Ransom-”

“Just say yes.”

Your heart is agreeing before your mind could tell you to leave, “yes.”

“Good, because we leave next week.”

“WHAT?!” you snap, shooting up.

“In my defense, this night wasn’t supposed to go like this at all.”

“Ransom...what did you do?”

“I’m assuming your passport is up to date.” “PASSPORT?! RANSOM-”

“Is it?”

“Jesus, yes. Ransom-”

“Lay back down so I can hold you.”

“Ransom-”

“Do you want me to remind you who’s in charge?”

“Ransom-”

“Get back over here,” he smirks, pulling you down as you giggle. “I want...I need for us to get away together. Time alone will be good for us.”

“You planned all of this?”

“I had a plan, Sweet Thing. I was going to pick you up from Daisy’s party, take you to that park you love so much, and tell you everything. Then I started drinking because I got nervous. Then, I saw Tyson all over you and lost my shit, and the outfit you were wearing only got me even more fired up, and then Jack came over...I had a plan.”

“Ransom, we can’t just-”

“Trying again isn’t a bad idea. Besides, I already told you I’m not giving up on us so, if you would’ve said no to this, I would’ve thought of something else. I’m not giving you up because we-”

“Ransom, you can’t just keep holding on to hope that-”

“Why can’t I? You love me and I love you Yeah, I fucked up, but I didn’t do anything that can’t be fixed.”

“You slept with Daisy.”

“I didn’t even cum and I was soft after two pumps. I very clearly didn’t fuck her.”

“Ransom-”

“I don’t want anyone else, Y/N,” he sighs as tightens his hold on you. “I don’t need anyone else.”

“We’ll talk about all of this in the morning, okay?”

“I love you.”

“I love you too, babe. We’ll try and figure it out tomorrow.”

“Just don’t change your mind,” he sighs as he relaxes against you. “I can be the man you want me to be, the man you need me to be. I just need you to believe in me like you did before.”

“In the morning, babe. We’ll talk about all of it in the morning,” you yawn as you succumb to sleep.

As a million thoughts roll through your mind, there’s one that just won’t leave you alone:

What the hell are you supposed to do with Hugh Ransom Drysdale?

**

“HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND?!” your Mother screams the second you answer your phone.

“Hello to you too, Mother.”

“You let Ransom-”

“Just stay out of it. I don’t need to hear about how disappointed you are, and I don’t want to-”

“I don’t approve of him, Y/N!”

“Well, I’ve got one thing working in my favor, because the last guy you approved of beat the shit out of me.”

“How many times do I need to apologize for that?!”

“Because you’ve apologized for it so much? When’s the last time you invited me to one of your garden parties or something-”

“You don’t enjoy them!”

“Since when have you ever gave a damn about that?”

“You insist on making the family look bad-”

“How is it always my fault? No matter what I do, I’m always wrong!”

“He’s not someone you want to end up with!”

“Once again, you should stay out of things that you know nothing about.”

“So, you’re just letting random men finger you in-”

“I don’t even leave the house! Besides, how do you even know about that?!”

“Jack is telling everyone about-”

“Of course he is, and of course you believe whatever he says.”

“Is it a lie?”

“Nope.”

“Y/N-”

“It’s time for me to make my own decisions about what will make me happy. No, it’s it not necessarily the best idea, but I love him. I love him, he makes me happy, and I don’t know...I haven’t decided on anything yet.”

“Y/N-”

“However,” you quickly interrupt, “it’s my choice and I’m done doing whatever you and Dad tell me.”

“Do you know what Linda is saying about you?!”

“Linda hates everyone, so I’m not surprised that she hates me.”

“Y/N, do you realize what you’ve done to your reputation?! I told you to stop sleeping with that boy, and now look! No one has any respect for you, your grandmother is furious with you, you’ll be lucky-”

“That sounds like a them problem! Jack cheated on me! Jack beat me! Jack lied to me! Yet, somehow, I’m the bad guy? I was a bet to him!”

“And now you’re a joke to everyone.”

“Thanks mom,” you scoff. “As much as I’ve enjoyed you raking me across the coals, I’ve got to-”

“We need you to come over next week.”

“I won’t be in town next week.”

“Move whatever you’re doing-”

“No, you shouldn’t have assumed I would be around. I don’t sit around and wait for you and Dad to need me for something.”

“What the hell do you have to do that’s so important that you can’t help your Father and I.”

“I honestly don’t know, I just know I’ll be out of the country. I’m going on a trip and-”

“You planned a trip, but you don’t know where you’re going?”

“I didn’t plan anything, Ransom did.”

“HAVE YOU LOST YOUR FUCKING MIND?!”

“I knew you’d take it well.”

“What the hell has gotten into you?!”

“Once I know, I’ll let you know.”

“It doesn’t bother you-”

“It bothers you that I’m not letting you control me, the way Nanna controlled you! Your hatred for Ransom aside, it fucking burns you that I didn’t stay in a toxic relationship like you did-”

“I stayed for you!”

“I begged you to get a divorce! It wasn’t for me, it was because your Mother drilled it into your head that you needed to put up with things that you shouldn’t have, and I’m really sorry that you had to put up with that, but it’s not my fault! I want to be happy and yeah, it’s messy as hell, but at least I’m trying to figure it out! So, stop making me feel like shit because you chose a life of comfort over a life of independence!”

“Don’t come crying to me when he breaks your heart,” your sniffles and you roll your eyes.

“Well, I didn’t the first time, so I’m sure I’ll be fine without you if it happens again.”

“You’ll learn the hard way. Love isn’t what you need, what you need is security. Once you finally grow up, you’ll realize that,” she snaps before hanging up.

You sigh before throwing your phone down on the coffee table and leaning back onto the sofa.

“That sounds like it was fun,” Daisy scoffs as she brings you a glass of juice.

“Just another day of me letting down my family.”

“Your family let you down years ago. It’s only time you return the favor,” she shrugs as she takes a seat next to you.

“What the fuck am I doing, Dais?”

“Babe, if you don’t know, I sure as shit don’t. Hell, I’ve been staying here all week as your Ransom kryptonite.”

“The only way I can keep him away is if you’re here,” you laugh as you grab your drink, coughing as soon as you swallow the first sip. “Dais!”

“Yeah, that’s a vodka cranberry.”

“Is there any cranberry in this?!”

“Of course! Where do you think the color came from?”

“Jesus Christ, Dais!” you laugh, putting the glass down and getting comfortable on the sofa again.

“I was gonna just get you juice, but I heard the phone call and-”

“If she’s not happy with me now, she’s never gonna be happy with me.”

“Fuck her. Yeah, I know, she’s your Mother, but it’s not like she fucking acts like it. It doesn’t matter that she had a tough childhood, if anything, it should’ve been more of an incentive for her to treat you better, not make sure you’re just as miserable as she was. That little outburst was long overdue.” “What’s it like to know everything?”

“I don’t know shit,” she laughs as she laid back, “I just know how I dealt with my dad after my mom died. No, they weren’t the best together, but they did love another. When she died, he did his best to be there for me and made sure I never felt alone. He looked out for me. No, he didn’t deal with everything the best, but he did make sure that I was taken care of. That’s what your Mom should’ve done, not try and make your life harder.”

“When’s the last time you talked to your Dad?”

“Eh, he called after my birthday party. Wanted to make sure I was safe.”

“How is it that we’re grown ass adults, and our parents still find out every little thing that we do?”

“Cause we live in a town of gossiping pieces of shit. Nothing is ever a secret,” she sighs with a soft smile. “I’m gonna fight Ransom for taking you away from me for two weeks.”

“I’ll be sure to let him know,” you laugh, taking another drink from your glass. “What the fuck am I doing Dais?”

“Figuring out what makes you happy.”

“I shouldn’t be with him, should I?”

“I can’t say anything, because I don’t know him the way you do, but I know there’s been a change in him. No, I’m not best friends with the guy, or do I ever hangout with him, but he really has cut down on all the shady shit. I don’t know, I guess I believe him. I still don’t like the asshole, but he seems really committed to you and making sure that you understand that.”

“Why did he have to make the fucking bet?!”

“You act like Ransom’s ever cared about anything-”

“He has-” you quickly defend before you can stop yourself.”He has...maybe not relationship wise, but he did care about his family...I’m not going to defend some of his actions, because some of it is inexcusable and I know that, and maybe I am a complete idiot, but I just...he lets me in, Dais. He lets me in past all the drama and all the bullshit. It should take more than that though, shouldn’t it? All the people hes hurt, all the wrong hes done...it should take more for me to be this in love with him, shouldn’t it?”

“You know me, babe. I’ve never been in love and I don’t think I ever will be, so I don’t know how any of this shit works. However, the way you light up when he calls you? The way you smile and giggle at your phone when he texts you? The way you try to not look at him when you two are in the same space? You never had that with Jack. That spark, that smile, that laugh...only Ransom brings that out of you, and I hate that I believe him. I hate that Hugh Ransom Drysdale is the love of your life, cause he’s such a piece of shit,” she scoffs and you burst out laughing. “Make him work for it though, this trip is nothing. Make him grovel.”

“I don’t want any groveling,” you laugh, “I just don’t wanna fuck it up again.”

“I really do think you’ve got it right this time. No, I don’t like the kid, but I’ve never seen him act like this.”

“He did fuck you.”

“Attempted, I wasn’t really having fun and his mind was 100% somewhere else. I saw the way he fucked you on that balcony, I definitely got gypped.”

“You’re a fucking mess,” you giggle.

“When is Prince Charming coming to whisk you away to...?”

“I have no idea where he’s taking me, I just know I need my passport. He said he’ll be here at 3:30 in the morning.”

“He’s probably gonna take you to London.”

“Why would he do that?”

“Girl, you already need your passport, so it’s not gonna be anywhere local, and you’re obsessed with London. If I know that, I’m sure as shit he does too. How the fuck does he know so much about you anyway?”

“The hell if I know,” you scoff before finishing off your drink. “Thanks for agreeing to watch my house.”

“Of course! You think Jack is gonna come around or something?”

“I honestly don’t know, but I’d rather be safe than sorry. If Ransom suspects that Jack has done anything to hurt or upset me, he’ll kill him and I don’t need that shit.”

“Ransom talks a lot of shit and yeah, he can throw a punch, but he isn’t actually capable of killing someone.”

“Tell that to Fran,” you mutter as you grab your phone that won’t stop going off. “Hey you.”

“You should be asleep,’” Ransom yawns and you can tell that he has yet to fall asleep.

“You’re coming to get me, so shouldn’t you be asleep?”

“Why do you want me to stay away? Are you trying to get me to confess that I miss you?”

“I can’t tell if you’re annoyed or not.”

“You know that I am.”

“Ransom-”

“We’re about to spend two weeks away together, but you needed to spend a week away from me?”

“Ransom, I can’t think straight when I’m around you. Besides, it’s not like you even texted me all week-”

“Because you’ve been avoiding me!”

“Did you call just to argue with me?”

“No,” he mutters and you can tell he’s pouting, “I wanted to remind you that I’ll be there at 3:30.”

“I remember,” you laugh softly.

“Come over.”

“No.”

“Then let me come over.”

“Daisy is sleeping over.”

“Jesus fuck!”

“We’ll be together soon enough.”

“You really are the most infuriating person to be in love with.”

“You’re one to talk.”

“Alright, I’m not gonna go down that road. I love you, see you in a few hours.” “I love you,” you laugh softly before hanging up.

“Alright, back the fuck up,” Daisy snaps as you throw your phone down, “what the fuck did you mean by ‘tell that to Fran’?!”

“Oh, don’t tell me you haven’t heard the whispers-”

“About Harlan!”

“Why is it easier to believe that he killed Harlan, which he didn’t, than it is to believe that?”

“You see the assholes we’re constantly around. All of them would kill for money, and I can definitely see Drysdale offing his grandfather to make sure that he still gets his money.”

“That’s why he killed Fran.”

“The fuck did Fran do?”

“She kept telling Marta that she should break up with him because it wasn’t real to him. He wanted the money and he wasn’t being faithful, and that was getting in the way of his plans. Also, he never liked Fran anyway, so he poisoned her.”

“How are you so calm about this? How are you okay with it?!”

“Because I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing, Dais,” you laugh incredulously. “Never in a million years did I think I would capable of loving someone like Ransom. None of this is as black and white as I’d like for it to be. Yeah, he made a bet about me twice, he killed Fran, he’s a privileged asshole, he’s entitled, he’s arrogant...the list goes on, so that should be enough though, right? All of that is more than enough reason for me to walk away, but then there’s everything else. There’s the side that hes learned to keep hidden because of people like his family and Tommy Smotts. The fact that the only reason he didn’t speak up on my wedding day because he saw how happy I was, he was the one who told Jack to get me that dragonfly set because Jack didn’t know what the fuck to get me, the fact that he beat the shit out of Jack, when I call he stops everything for me, he’s funny, he’s incredibly sweet and thoughtful if you give him the chance to be. It’s the fact that when I’m not with him, I feel like a part of me is missing until I’m with him again. It’s the fact that he wants more than just sex and he actually fucking listens when I talk. He asks my opinion on the things he does with the publishing company, he will sit on FaceTime with me for hours just because I’m feeling lonely, he doesn’t do anything without taking me into consideration. Hell, last week, he had a bunch of groceries delivered to my house and it was everything I loved. The reason? He text me saying that he got groceries for himself and he figured he’d get some for me just in case I need something.

I really wish I could make a choice, because it would make my life a hell of a lot easier, but there are so many levels to him. Yeah, I know why he should be better for everyone and not just me, but it’s not like I don’t get why he is the way he is. No one in his life has ever given him a reason to do better, so he just shut down. I can’t fault him for that. Obviously murder is bad, but it’s not like that whole family isn’t capable of it. Linda did almost kill Richard after she found out about the cheating that went on behind her back for months. Is that making an excuse for him? Maybe it is, but that whole family is rotten so it makes sense. Hell, Walt was all set to go to jail before all the evidence mysteriously went away. I just...it was just sex for me when it all started. A way to get back at Jack for all the wrong he did and finally feeling wanted and cared about, but it was so much more than to Ransom and it has been for a while. He didn’t take the $40,000 and for as fed up and angry as hes been, he hasn’t gone to seek affection and attention from anyone else. He loves me, Daisy and I love him. God, I love him so much and I really wish I could just choose.”

“I’m sure this trip will be the best way for you to do that,” she smiles softly as you wipe your eyes. “How about we fall asleep to ‘Texas Chainsaw Massacre?”

“You always know how to make a girl smile” you laugh softly, making your way over to and cuddling up against her.

As you two slowly fall asleep to blood curdling screams, your mind wanders back to Ransom, like it always does. You hope that by the end of this trip, you can finally decide once and for all if he’s worth all this trouble. Yeah, when things are good, they’re amazing. However, when they’re bad...it’s a fucking shit show. It also doesn’t help that hes never been in a relationship. However, the part of you that’s scared isn’t louder than the part of you that’s pathetically in love with him.

God, please let this trip go well.

**

“Drysdale can’t seem to keep his eyes off of you,” Daisy smirked as she leaned against your desk.

You looked over to see Ransom sitting on top of his desk, eyes on you like a hawk, as Jack going on about something Ransom clearly didn’t give a shit about, “God, please no.”

“He wants to fuck you so bad,” she scoffed.

“I highly doubt that. He probably heard about my shit show of a birthday party and is silently judging me,” you muttered as you slouched down in your seat.

“Yeah, what the fuck was your Mom on? Holy shit!”

“About 7 shots of Jägermeister, some of her infamous “happy pills”, and her catching my Father fucking the caterer.”

“For fucks sake, your parents are a fucking shit show.”

“I wasn’t expecting them to be perfect, because they’re my parents, but I didn’t expect it to get that bad. Jesus, she almost set the fucking house on fire!”

“Fuck that shit, she almost drowned herself in the pool. What did your Grandmother say?”

“Oh, she’s seething mad. I’ve never heard my her yell before, and it was terrifying.”

“Did she at least yell at your Dad?”

“Nope. My Mother knows how my Father, and she needs to learn how to act accordingly.”

“How is it that your Grandmother is worse than your Mom?”

“As if I know,” you scowled as Jennie Taggs made her way in front of your desk, arms crossed and an evil little smile on her face.

Great.

“Your Mom put on quite the show on Saturday,” she remarked as she flipped her perfect blonde hair to the side.

“Fuck off, Jennie.”

“The speech she made about your dad being a cheating piece of shit while standing on the table? Truly amazing,” she laughed.

You hadn’t even noticed that Ransom had made his way over to the little spectacle.

“Hey Jen, how much longer till your dumbass Dad gets out of jail for money laundering?” you faintly heard him ask before he casually walked out of the classroom.

Wait...what?

“That’s hilarious,” Daisy laughed, pulling you somewhat back to consciousness.

“Shut the fuck up, Daisy. Everyone knows you’re a whore.”

“Great come back there, Jen.”

“Isn’t that what you let Mr. Smotts do? Cum on your back?”

“Yeah, I was practicing for when I go see your Father for a conjugal visit. Don’t wanna end up like your old babysitter now do we?”

“Fucking bitch!” Jennie started to sob as she ran off.

“Don’t you dare go after her,” Daisy snapped as she pushed you back down in your seat.

“That was too far-”

“It’s what she fucking deserved, stupid fucking bitch. She needs to be happy that only my words hurt her.”

“Did Ransom say...wait, you slept with Mr. Smotts?”

“No, he slipped his hand up skirt while I was standing in their kitchen, his wife came in just as I slapped his hand away, and she told everyone that I was trying to seduce her husband, which of course turned into I fucked her husband, and now the story just lives a life of it’s own,” she shrugged. “My Dad kicked his ass, so I don’t care.”

“That’s so fucked-”

“Hey, you okay?” Ransom asks, pulling you out of your memory.

“Huh? Yeah no, I’m fine,” you smile softly as he gets in the tub with you.

“What’s going on in that head of yours?”

“Just a memory.”

“Of?”

“When you defended me against Jennie.”

“God, she’s such a bitch,” he scowls and you giggle softly. “What brought on the memory?”

“I’ve just been thinking about a lot of things since we got here. You brought me to London, got us this amazing suite, you’ve been amazing-”

“But you’re still weighing your options.”

“I’m not weighing my options, Ransom. I love you and yes, you are good to me, but you’re terrible to other people and you’ve done terrible things.”

“I haven’t done them to you.”

“That’s not how this works and you know that.”

“Fuck everyone else! It’s only about you and me-”

“Ransom-”

“If I’m so terrible, why do you stay?”

“Because I love you.”

“Yeah? What do you love about me?” he asks seductively, tone dropping as spreads your legs open and pulls you close.

“Ransom-”

“C’mon baby,” he coos, placing you on his lap so you’re straddling him, “I wanna hear all of the things you love about me,” he encourages as a he starts to tease your clit with his thumb.

“I love the way you take care of me,” you sigh, keeping eye-contact with him as you try and hang on.

“Yeah? What else baby?”

“I love the...the way you hold me, how you let me in and get to know you, the way...God, Ransom!”

“C’mon baby,” he whispers as his lips ghost along the collar of your neck, “keep going.”

“How dedicated you are to the publishing company, the way you’re always surprising me with flowers, the fact that you...oh, I’m so fucking close, please!”

“Tell me more, Sweet Thing.” “Fuck! You’re so...you’re so caring, funny, s-smart, honest-t, you listen t-to me, only feel whole when...aht!”

“You only feel whole when what?”

“When I-I’m with you! Jesus, please!”

“Cum for me, baby,” he tells you softly and it’s all you need to be sent over the edge.

You grip the side of the bathtub, trying to ride out your high against his thumb, but it’s not enough and you need more.

“We should get ready to go to dinner, baby.”

“I don’t want dinner, I want you.”

“Sweet Thing-”

“Feels like you need me too,” you moan as you dip your hand in the water and start to stroke him.

“Always so needy,” he groans. “Fuck it, this pussy is my favorite meal anyway.”

This is how most of your talks have been ending since you both got to London. No, it’s not healthy, but it’s not like you can ever get your body to listen to you. That’s why you stayed away from him for a week.

“Ransom! The Ritz?! Are you insane?!”

“Had to make sure I made this trip worth your while.”

“Ransom this is too much!”

“Hush,” he smiled as you both reached the front desk.

“Welcome to the Ritz,” the concierge smiled, “checking in or checking out?”

“In. Drysdale, Ransom,” Ransom said nonchalantly as he took out his card. You can tell that he’s going to toss the card, but one look at the stern scowl on his face has him rolling his eyes and handing the gentleman his card. “Have the changes I asked for been made?”

“Yes sir, early this morning. Your bags are being taken up now and everything is all set up and taken care of,” the man smiled politely as he handed Ransom back his card.

“Great, we’ll be back in a bit.”

“Ransom, what are-”

“Lets go,” he whispered with a mischievous smile before he took your hand and led you out of the luxurious hotel.

“Ransom, how do you have something planned already?! We just got here,” you laughed in pure disbelief.

“I know what my Sweet Thing likes, and I know you’re way too wired to sleep,” he smirked before turning his attention to the bell boy “Drysdale, there’s supposed to be a car-”

“Of course, Mr. Drysdale, I’ll grab it for you right now,” the bell boy smiled before he ran off.

“Why is everyone afraid of you? Ransom-”

“The Thrombey name is worldwide, babe. When I called and said who I am, everything I wanted was made available to me.”

“This had to have been a fortune!”

“Nothing is too much for you,” he smiled as a red classic Ford Mustang Convertible pulled up, with champagne flutes filled in the console. 

“Ransom...this is...”

“C’mon, I’ve got a few surprises for you before dinner,” he smirked before he pulled you close and kissed you passionately.

The entire drive felt like a dream, and you felt as if you were in a movie. Yeah, you knew that he’d been paying a lot of attention to for a while, but how much did he know, and how did he know it? You probably should’ve been worried about how he knew so much, but you couldn’t bring yourself to worry or care.

“Ransom...” you gasped as he pulled up the Royal Botanical Gardens.

“Your obsession with flowers and gardening made this particularly easy,” he laughed as he pulled into the parking lot.

“You didn’t have to-”

“I wanted to.”

“Why are you like this?”

“Because I love you,” he replied simply with a shrug, as if it were something you should’ve known already.

You were still perplexed.

The entire time you two were there, you looked around in pure amazement. It’s not like you’d never been to a garden before, but this was more beautiful than anything you’d ever seen. You’d promised yourself you take yourself on a trip around Europe when you finished with college, but you could never find the time. Then, when you married Jack, you told him that you wanted to go to London and explore everything you could, but he had no interest in that.

“Ransom! How can you be on your phone at a time like this?! This place is amazing! Put your phone away, work can wait!”

“Yes ma’am,” he smirked as put his phone away and took your hand in his, “anything you say.”

“Thank you for this, truly. Everything is so beautiful and I’m so fucking happy. I love this. I love you.”

“I’d do anything to see you smile,” he promised softly as he cupped your face, “anything at all.”

As always when he kisses you, felt your knees go weak and you held on to him for support.You swear you’ll never get used to his kisses.

“We’re just getting started,” he smiled once you two broken apart.

“There’s more?! Babe, this is more than enough-”

“Not even close,” he laughed as he took your hand in his and resumed walking the trail you two were on.

After dragging you away from the botanical garden, Ransom surprised you with a trip to the Natural History Museum (which took up most of your time because the place is huge), which was followed by him taking you shopping for like figurines and antiques, then a trip to the theater.

“What are you doing in there? We’re gonna be late for dinner,” he laughed as you applied your last bit of makeup.

You put a few loose curls in your hair and put it in a half pony tail, tying it up with a burgundy ribbon to match your dress. Since Ransom wouldn’t tell you where the hell he was taking you, you had no idea what to do.

‘Just look nice’ is all he told you.

Knowing Ransom, it wasn’t going to be some hole-in-the-wall type of deal, so put on one of your fancier outfits. Nothing too crazy, but it was definitely something you wouldn’t wear on a night out with Daisy.

“I just wanna make sure I look good for you!”

“You always look perfect, now come on.”

“So pushy!”

“You’ll thank me when we get there, lets go!” he sighed, and you knew he rolled his eyes.

“Yeah yeah, is this okay?” you asked you stepped out of the bathroom and put on your heels into your heels.

When he didn’t say anything, you got nervous and looked up only to see him staring at you with a look of pure ‘awe’.

“What? What’s wrong? Is it too much? I have another-”

“How do you always manage to look so damn perfect all the time?”

“You’re so funny.” “I mean it. You will always be the most gorgeous woman in the world to me.”

“Ransom,” you smiled shyly as you quickly looked away.

“C’mon, lets go.”

Ransom held your hand for the entire drive, glancing over at you and smiling at you every so often, you it only made more butterflies appear in your stomach on top of the ones that were already there.

“Jesus Ransom!” you exclaimed as he pulled up to the restaurant and he snorted, “how much money did you spend on this trip, exactly?!”

“I can afford it,” he smirked as he opened his door and got out, quickly making his way to your side and opening your door for you, “now, lets fucking eat.”

As you sat down, you couldn’t stop looking around the restaurant. It wasn’t anything too fancy, but you knew he was gonna spend a pretty penny.

“Hey, what’s going on with you?” Ransom laughed, pulling you out of your thoughts as the waiter walked away.

“I’m sorry, did I miss something?”

“Yeah, the waiter came over and took our drink order. I got you Merlot. Are you alright?”

“Yeah no, I am! Everything is perfect,” you smiled at him.

“But?”

“This is just so much and it’s only our first day. No ones ever done anything like this for me before. Not even close.”

“What Jack didn’t take you away on trips?”

“You know he didn’t,” you scowled. “Did you pull these tricks with Marta too?”

“One, this isn’t a trick. I love you and I want to spoil you, because it’s what you deserve and the least I can do. Two, I barely took Marta out of the state, you think I took her of the country?” he scoffed as the drinks arrived.

“Ransom!”

“What?”

“Do you two need more time deciding on what you would like to order?” the waiter asked nervously.

“Yes please,” you smiled sweetly towards the waiter before your gaze fell back on Ransom and your scowl returned.

“I don’t know why you’re looking at me like that,” he shrugged as he reached for his rye and took a drink from it.

“How can you be so sweet, warm, and loving with me, and so cruel to everyone else? Like they mean nothing to you?”

“Because they don’t mean anything to me.”

“But I’m supposed to believe that it’s different with me?”

“I’m doing my best to show you that-”

“Marta was in love with you, Ransom. You broke her heart just so you could get back your cut of the inheritance and then some. You pursued me all over a bet-”

“I didn’t take the money-”

“Be that as it may, you still made the bet in the first damn place. You want me to believe you, and you don’t know how badly I want to, but you treat people as if they’re trinkets.”

“I’ve never treated you that way. Yes, I am an asshole that’s not lost on anyone, least of all me, but I do love you, Y/N. You think I’m doing all of this for just sex? You and I both know I can fuck whoever I want without even leaving my house. You think I’d spend all of this money just get back at Jack? You think I would stop sleeping around just to toy with you? I have never put this much energy or effort into anything. Why? Because what’s the fucking point? If I hadn’t been so damn scared in the past, I would’ve made a move years ago, but I didn’t and that’s on me. However, I’m trying now. I’m doing my best to show you that I am serious. Do I strike you the kind of guy who holds people when they cry? Do I strike you as the type of guy who deals with crying at all? You are all I think, all I dream about, and all I have ever wanted and more. I know I don’t deserve you, okay? Why do you think I kept my mouth shut at your wedding? I know you deserve better than me, but now I’ve had you. I’ve spent time in your arms, I’ve woken up next to you, I’ve made love to you. I could barely breathe around you before, but now I fee like I can’t breathe until I’m around you. You have consumed every part of my life, your air in my lungs, and every other sappy and romantic thing you can think of. I am doing my best to show you that you are everything to me,” he finished with a heavy sigh. “I know I’ve never been in a real relationship before and I know that when it comes to being truthful and having good intentions, my track record is shit, but with the exception of the bet, I’ve never lied to you. There were multiple times that it would’ve been in my best interest, but I’ve always told you the truth. I’ve done my best to be patient, watch my temper, and be more understanding. Waiting for you has been one of the hardest things that I’ve ever done and is insanely infuriating, but it’s not about me. I hurt you, I betrayed your trust , and now I have to wait and that’s what I’m doing. No, my love isn’t perfect, but it’s genuine and real,” he finished softly before he took a sup of his rye and kept your eyes on the menu and wiped your tears away.

“Are you two ready to order?” the waiter asked again, timidly.

“She’ll have the Langoustine tortellini to start and the United Kingdom CITE de KöD for her main. I’ll have beef carpaccio to start and the Japan wagyu for my main. We’ll also take another round of drinks.”

“Coming right up,” the waiter smiled with a nod before walking off.

“How did you...you didn’t even look at the menu?”

“I looked at it before I made a reservation.”

“How did you know what I wanted?”

“Because I know you,” he smiled with a wink.

The rest of dinner went perfectly enough: he asked you what part of the day you enjoyed the best, what you’re looking forward to, what you wanna do, and if you had any issues with your food. You tried to ask him what he wanted to do, but he only responded with:

“This trip is all about you, babe.”

Of course, when the check came, he already had his card ready because he knew you were gonna try and pay for it.

“You’re not as slick as you’d like to think you are,” he laughed as you two made your way back to the car.

“Ya can’t blame a girl for trying.”

The entire drive back, he had that same smile on his face that he had when he drove you two to the restaurant. He looked so content and happy and it filled your heart with so much happiness. It never left your mind how much you shouldn’t be with Ransom, but the heart wants what it wants.

“You’re the one who wanted to watch this damn movie, get your ass in here!” Ransom called from the bedroom.

The second you two got back to the hotel room, you raced to the bathroom and told Ransom that you were in a rush to get all of your makeup off, but that’s not what you had in mind at all.

“I’ll be in there in a second, this mascara is a bitch to get off.”

“I don’t know why you put makeup on at all, you don’t need it.”

“Aren’t you just a big softie?”

“Yeah whatever, just get your ass back in here,” he muttered and you giggled.

You were all set to go back in there when your phone buzzed. It was an Instagram notification from Ransom. He’d tagged you in something. It didn’t take much for your curiosity to win and you were instantly unlocking your phone and checking to see what it was.

RanDry88: The only person worth giving a fuck about in this shit storm we call life.

All the times you thought he’d been on his phone working, he’d been secretly taking photos of you, and for him to post you like it was nothing, with that as his caption, well... if you were smitten before, you sure as shit didn’t know what to call yourself at that point.

“What the hell is this movie even about, Sweet Thing? I read the info thing and-fuck,” he mumbled as you walked on in black heels to match the black lace lingerie you were wearing.

“Today has been the best day, and it was only the first one, daddy,” you told him seductively as you crawled onto the bed. “You did all this just to make me happy?” you asked as you straddled him, and he reached out to touch you.

“I’d do anything to make you happy, Sweet Thing,” he breathed out as you grabbed his hand and slowly guided it down from your tits to your clothed and soaked pussy. “Sweetheart-”

“Do you really love me, daddy?” you asked as you used your free hand to pull the flimsy material to the side.

“More than I’ve ever loved anything or anyone in this world...fuck, baby!”

“Take these two fingers and show me,” you demanded as you grabbed two of his fingers and slowly slid yourself down on them.

“Oh my God.”

“Feel how much I love you? How much I need you?”

“Greediest little cunt,” he husked as he picked up his pace.

“Tsk tsk, no daddy. You said this trip is all about me and, right now, I want you to take it slow. I’m in control right now,” you told him softly as you slowly started to ride his fingers.

“Holy shit!” he groaned as he clenched his eyes shut.

“Focus on me, daddy. You wanna fuck this tight little pussy? Your tight little pussy?”

“You can’t feel how bad I want it?”

“I want to hear you say it.”

“I need it, sweetheart. Need you. I wanna bury myself deep inside you every night for the rest of my life.”

Once he curled his fingers inside of you, you threw your head back and moaned, “I’ve never loved someone this much. Never...thought you could love me like...oh! Baby, that’s it!”

“You’re a fucking dream, did you know that? Everything about you is fucking perfect!”

“Shiiit!!” you screamed out as you came hard.

“Fucks sake,” he growled as you rode his fingers through your high. “I need you, please.”

“What do you need, daddy?” you breathed as you finally came back to reality.

“To get lost in you for as long as you’ll let me.”

You didn’t say a word. You lifted yourself just a little so he could remove his fingers and you slipped them into his mouth, before you started to get to work on unbuckling his pants and working his pants and briefs off just enough to expose what you both truly wanted to take care of.

“So hard for me, daddy,” you whimpered as you ground your hips against his. “Tell me how I good I taste,” you begged, as you removed his fingers from his mouth and he let out a pathetic whimper.

“Like a fucking dream!”

“You wanna get lost deep inside me?”

“Please!” he rasped as he gripped your hips and tried to hold on.

You said nothing. Instead, you just slid yourself down on his cock and you both let out a satisfied groan.

“Fuck, I love seeing you like this, Sweet Thing.”

“Like what, daddy?” you mewled, clawing at his clothed chest as you lulled your head back and started to pick up your pace.

“In con...control, taking what you want...what you need,” he moaned as one of his hands reached up into your hair and easily untied the bow in it, unwinding the rest of your hair as it cascaded down your face. “So fucking sexy,” he praised as his soft hands caressed your cheeks before they journeyed downward, exploring and caressing the shape of you. “I love you!” “I lov...I love you too! Oh my..fuck! Daddy! So close! Gonna cum so fucking hard for you!”

“Please!”

“Aht...shit!” you screamed as you squirted on his cock, trying to keep yourself somewhat upright as you rode out your orgasm.

“Never knew you could be this controlling,” Ransom chuckled with a smirk once your breathing was even again.

“Did you like it, daddy?”

“I fucking loved it, Sweet Thing.”

“I think you should show me how much.”

“We’ll take as much time as you time as you need to get the fucking point,” he promised as he flipped you onto your back.

Yes, there were days of the trip that were perfect and ended up with you two tangled up in the sheets. However, there were also days that you two ended up with you two tangled up in the sheets out of sheer anger and frustration.

“Oh God, Ransom,” you moaned with your eyes still shut as your hand gripped his hair tight.

“Time to for you to wake up,” he mumbled against your clit before he pulled on it with his lips.

“Fuck! Feels so good...shit!”

He slid two fingers into your soaked and, as you arched your back, you wondered what you did so right to receive a wake up call like that.

What you did so right to have Hugh Ransom Drysdale so in love with you.

“Fuck, just like that...aht! Fuck!” you cried out, grinding yourself against his face while your other hand fisted the sheets.

Your pathetic pleas and cries only made Ransom pick up his pace, desperate to taste you. Once he added another finger, you saw stars.

“Fuck!”

The vibration from Ransom’s hum of satisfaction almost sent you into another orgasm.

“Fuck me,” you demanded once he finished cleaning up between your legs.

“Daddy ‘ll take care of you later, Sweet Thing. We have to go,” he groaned, looking you over.

“Please-”

“Don’t be a brat. I want fuck you until you can’t walk, but we have a flight to catch.”

“A fl-WHAT DID YOU DO?!” you exclaimed as you sat up and he started laughing.

“Get up.”

“Ransom-”

“We’ll be back before dinner.”

“Ransom-”

“No more questions. Get up, join me in the shower, and lets go,” he smirked as he walked towards the bathroom. When he didn’t hear you following after him, he threw his briefs at you, “lets go, Y/N!”

You tried to question him during the shower, but he’d just kiss you to shut you up. Every time you’d try to take it further, he’d just pin your hands against the shower wall, and tell you:

“be a good little girl, or you’re in for a long night with daddy.”

Torturous asshole knew exactly what he was doing, but you decided that it would be in your best interest to obey.

For the time being.

“Do you still speak a hundred different languages for no reason?” Ransom asked as got to the airport.

“I didn’t learn them for no reason. It’s rude to go to another country and expect them to speak English.”

“English is the number one language in the world, and you didn’t answer my question.”

“It’s still rude, Ransom, and yes, I do.”

“Good, it’ll come in handy in Italy.”

“ITALY?!”

“I really do enjoy exciting you,” he chuckled as he pulled into a parking space.

“Ransom-” “Flight to catch, lets go.”

Everything was fine initially. You practically bouncing the entire flight, Ransom was happy because you were happy, and you two continued to learn more about each other. When the plane landed, you practically ran off and Ransom had to keep his arm around your waist to keep you close.

Once again, he surprised with just how much he’d been paying attention.

“You’re taking me shopping in Milan?!”

“Shopping, site seeing, and lunch.”

“You have to let me get you something!”

“What did I tell you our first night in London?”

“Baby-”

“You have all this money and you spend it on everyone else, I know for a fact that Jack never spoiled you, and your parents treat you like you’re a fucking show pony. Yeah, Daisy takes you on trips, but I know you don’t let her spoil you-”

“Who spoils you?”

“You love me and that’s all I need.”

“You’re working hard for that yes, Drysdale,” you teased as you two walked out of the airport hand-in-hand.

Everything was perfect up until lunch.

“I don’t give a fuck that Walt told you to call me! Did I not leave specific instructions to not call me until I get back?...I don’t care that he threatened to fire you! Besides, it’s not bad enough that you called, but you called with bad news!...It’s not hard for deadlines to be met, so what the hell is wrong with everyone that works for this company?! Ya know, you don’t have to worry about Walt firing you, cause I’m doing it now. Pack up your desk and good luck finding a job somewhere else, especially if you try to use me a fucking reference!” Ransom snapped before he hung up. “Everyone is a fucking idiot, I swear to God...oh, why are you looking at me like that?!”

“Because you’re being an asshole?”

“How am I being an asshole?! I told him-”

“Walt threatened to fire him! He was scared-”

“I told everyone not to call me until I got back. It’s not my fault that Walt is incompetent!”

“Okay, whatever,” you muttered as you reached for your glass of champagne.

“How are you mad at me right now?!”

“Don’t act like you don’t know you’re being a complete and total dick right now, Ransom.”

“It’s my company-”

“That you weaseled your way into.”

“Don’t be a bitch about it, Y/N.”

“Okay, we’re done talking about this.”

“Fine.”

“Fine.”

You two barely spoke to each other for the rest of the time spent in Milan, you refused to let him touch you on the flight back, and the second you two got back to the hotel room, you stormed off into the living area. By the time he was ready for dinner, you were in your pyjamas.

“You know you aren’t going to bed. It’s too early,” he sighed as he walked into the bedroom.

“I don’t know what else there is to do,” you shrugged as you continued to flip through channels.

“You need to eat dinner and I made reservation at-”

“Well, since I’m a bitch and you’re an asshole-”

“You know I didn’t mean it-”

“Well, I meant it about you being an asshole!”

“Stop it, okay? I’m sorry. I ruined the trip and I know you’re right, okay?”

“As long as you fucking know. I don’t want to have dinner with you anyway.”

“Yes you do.”

“No, I actually don’t.”

“Stop being so fucking stubborn,” he muttered as he made his way over to the side of bed you were on and sat next to you. “I really am sorry,” he said sincerely as he scooped you onto his lap.

“You can’t keep letting your temper get the best of you.”

“I’m working on it, okay? This is the first time I’ve ever had someone in my life to truly keep me in check.”

“You tell me you love me and then-”

“I do love you. I was just irritated. I was annoyed, because I know Walt did that on purpose. The fact that I run the company infuriates him, and the fact that Marta just handed it over to me only makes it that much worse. I shouldn’t have lashed out at you and I didn’t mean to. I really am sorry,” he promised sincerely.

“You’re gonna have to take me back to Milan to make it up to me,” you pouted and he chuckled.

“Just tell me when and we’ll go.”

“You can’t keep acting like this, Ransom. I know things were tough, but that’s no reason for you to take it out on everyone else. At some point, you really have to grow up.”

“I know, I know. I’m working on it. I’ll send the kid a text and let him know that he can have his job back if he wants it, and I’ll even apologize.”

“Don’t just tell me what I wanna hear.”

“I know better than to ever do that,” he scoffed as he kissed your forehead. “I know it means a lot to you, so-”

“It should mean a lot to you too.”

“People don’t matter to me-”

“I matter to you-”

“Which is why I’m trying-”

“I can’t be the only person who means something to you. I can’t be the only reason you try.”

“You can’t expect change over night. I’m trying and I need you to be patient with me.”

“I’m trying. I know that you’re capable of being a great guy-”

“But you also have to accept that there are some parts of me you’re just not going to like.”

“That sounds a lot like you coping out of trying.”

“No, that’s me being honest about the fact that there are certain things that I just can’t change. I’ve been this way for a while, and while it’s not impossible for me to change certain things, there are things that are just embedded in my DNA. You didn’t fall in love with me because I’m some boy scout. Fuck, I told you I murdered Fran and you’re still here. No, I don’t plan on planning on murdering anyone else, as long as they’re good to you, but we both know there’s a dark side to me that will always be there. You have to accept that part of me.”

You hated that he had a point.

“Ransom, I can accept a certain amount of darkness, but it can’t all be dark. You’ve gotta get your shit together.”

“And you’ve gotta accept that this isn’t some cookie cutter relationship. You have to accept that there are parts of me that you aren’t always going to like.”

“Ransom-”

“You know who and how I am. There can be light, but you know that there can be dark. I’ll do my best to be my best for you, but it’s not always going to be sunshine and rainbows. I’m an asshole, I’m unforgiving, and I’m unapologetic. You’re the only person I want to work on those things for and I don’t feel the need, right now, to spread that feeling of understanding to anyone else.”

“Ransom-”

“You can’t force me to change over night, Y/N. It’s just not gonna work. I love you, but I’m not God and I’m nowhere near attempting to be perfect. I love you and I want to be with you, but you have to accept that I come with flaws.”

You took a moment to think all of it over before you responded with, “I can’t tell you that I’m willing to accept all of the bad that comes with a little bit of good, but I want to try. I love you too much to not try.”

“So...are you finally saying-”

“No,” you quickly interjected with a laugh, “especially after today, you don’t get to call me your girlfriend so easily, but I am willing to explore this further.” “I’ll take what I can get,” he sighed as he kissed your shoulder.

“I’ll get dressed and we can go-”

“Not really in the mood to go out right now,” he murmured against your shoulder, as his hand traveled up your night shirt and pinched your nipple.

“Ransom,” you gasped, arching your back as you leaned against him.

“I honestly don’t give a fuck about making anyone else mad or upset, but you...will you let daddy show you just how sorry he is?”

“You can do whatever you want,” you whimpered as he ripped your panties off.

No matter how the days went, they always ended the same: Ransom deep inside of you, telling you just how much he loves and needs you.

Tonight is no different.

“Come on, Sweet Thing! I know this cunt can give me your sweet cream one more time!”

The best you can respond with is a garbled moaned as you strangle your hands strangle the pillows.

“Aw, did daddy fuck his little girl stupid?” he chuckles, slapping your ass hard while he continues to fuck into you relentlessly from behind. “Fucked so good you went numb?”

Ransom wasted no time getting you from the bathtub to the bed, and you don’t even remember how long ago that was, all you know is that you feel like you’re in heaven.

“Give it to me! Be the perfect little whore and give your daddy what wants,” he growls as he reaches around and grips your throat.

“Fuck!”

“Feel good? Having me deep inside you with this fat cock?”

“Too...too-”

“So fucked out,” he chuckles darkly as he grips your hair, puling you up right, “daddy wants another orgasm,” he whispers harshly in your ear.

“B-bite...please...my neck!”

“Anything for my sweet girl,” he husks before biting down on your sweet spot.

“FUCKING SHIT!” you scream out, squirting hard as you reach around and grip his waist.

Ransom follows with a loud, “FUCK!” as he lets go of your hair and you fall onto the bed unceremoniously. “Shit! I’m sorry-”

“I’m perfect,” you mumble, gripping a pillow as you try to find your way through the euphoric cloud he put you in.

“You promise?”

“You’ve been rougher than that, I’m fine,” you giggle softly. “I’m more than sure we missed our reservation though,” you whine as he pulls out.

“I’ll order up room service and make it up to you tomorrow,” he promises as he lays down next to you.

“You don’t have to make anything up to me.”

“You’ll see tomorrow,” he promises before kissing the top of your forehead. “I love you.”

“I love you.”

“You better. Now,” he starts as he pulls his phone off the nightstand and clicking through a few things, “what overpriced meal do you want for dinner?” he mutters as you burst out laugh and cuddle up to him.

Sometimes, just fucking sometimes, Hugh Ransom Drysdale is a dream come true.

**

“You haven’t said shit for almost the entire train ride,” Ransom laughs as you continue to look out the window.

“You’re taking me to Paris! Ransom!”

“It’s our last day, I wanted to make sure you enjoyed it,” he shrugs as he wraps an arm around your shoulder.

“I’ve loved this entire trip, you didn’t have to do this”

“I fucked up Milan.”

“You already said you’re gonna make it up to me.”

“Count this as part of that.”

“Ransom-”

“Just let me love and spoil you,” he interrupts with a laugh before kissing you passionately. “I love you.”

“I love you.”

God, you’re living an absolute dream right now.

Shopping in Paris is another thing you’d dreamed of, and promised yourself you’d do. Not even for anything selfish, it’s just something you’ve always wanted to do. Now, you’re here with Ransom and nothing is off limits.

“Ransom, no! Put it back!” you whisper as Ransom picks up a $1,500 dress.

“Try it on,” he laughs.

“No! That’s way too much for a dress!”

“You want it.”

“I don’t need it!”

“You can either try it on to make sure it fits, or I’ll just sent to your house and you can deal with alterations in Massachusetts.”

“Ransom-”

“It’s okay to have nice things, Sweet Thing.”

“Not this nice!”

“Try it on,” he laughs, handing you the dress.

“You’re letting me buy you an overpriced watch or something before we leave Paris,” you mutter, begrudgingly taking the dress and walking off in the direction of the dressing rooms.

As get out of your clothes, and carefully slip into the dress, you think about the last two weeks. Maybe being with Ransom won’t be the worst thing. Yes, he’s definitely going to have to tone it down on the gifts, but he’s not completely terrible. Besides, unlike Jack, he’s not hiding anything from you. Hes laid everything out in front of you; the good and the bad. Plus, it’s not like he hasn’t told you that he’ll try, and you can’t help but believe him. No, he isn’t some knight in shining armor, but you knew that when all of this started what feels like forever ago.

“Well, what do you think of it?” Ransom asks, coming into the dressing room.

“You can’t be in here!” you whisper yell and he chuckles.

“I think I want to rip it off of you and fuck you senseless.”

“Ransom!”

“I’ll behave...for now. Do you like it?”

“You don’t think it’s too tight?”

“It’s making my pants too tight.”

“Stop,” you laugh as you playfully shove him. “I like it. I’m only wearing it when I’m with you though.”

“I’m only letting you wear it when I’m with you. Now, get changed so I can spoil you some more.”

“You spoil me too much.”

“Get used to it, Sweet Thing.”

“We’re setting a spending cap for you. Now, get out so I can change.”

“I’m here to make sure no one gets in,” he smirks.

“Ransom.”

“Be a good girl and change so we can go.”

You swear there’s a raging devil in him at all times.

“Fuck,” he sighs once he sees you in your red lace lingerie set, his fingers ghosting along your torso.

“Don’t start,” you whimper pathetically, not even believing yourself, “you just had me this morning.”

“As if once a day is enough,” he murmurs as he pulls you close, “I always want you.”

“Ransom-” “Like I said, I’ll be good...for now,” he tells you with a foreboding tone as he let go of you.

“What do you have planned?” you ask as you quickly pull your shorts up. “Don’t worry about it. Now, hurry up and finish getting dressed so we can go. Daddy has a lot he wants to get done for his little princess today.”

“You are nothing but trouble.”

“And you love it,” he smirks, biting his bottom lip as you pull your tank top on. “Should’ve just kept you in bed all day.”

“Stop being a menace,” you whine and he laughs. “Thank you, Ransom. For all of this. These last two weeks have been perfect, and while I’m not used to anything on this scale, it’s been amazing. I love you so much and I’m so happy.”

“I wanna make you this happy forever.”

“Maybe you’ll get the chance to,” you smile as you grab the dress and make your way out.

You told Ransom that you were happy with just the dress, but he still insisted upon getting you a diamond bracelet and diamond choker to match. When you try to protest, he basically ignores you as he put his card on the table and tells you to ‘just accept it’.

It’s not like you have much of a choice.

“Okay, you’ve gotta explain it to me,” Ransom sighs as you two sit in the back of the car service her ordered.

“Explain what?”

“You have all this money and never spend it on yourself.”

“Oh,” you giggle as you lay your head on his shoulder, “I don’t know, I just don’t see the need to, I guess.”

“No, I know you too well. What’s the reason?”

“It’s just...no one we know is happy. The happiest person I know is Daisy, which is really fucking sad, because she’s just as sad and depressed as I am. She just drinks and fucks it away. I’m happiest when I’m helping others. The homeless, charities, soup kitchens...I don’t see the point in having a bunch of materialistic things when it doesn’t bring me joy. I have everything I need, so what’s the point of buying things I want?”

“You can still take yourself on trips and-”

“That would make me feel too much like my mom,” you scoff, “that’s how she dealt with everything. My Father cheating? A trip. My Grandmother giving her shit? A trip. Someone dying? A trip. Her response to everything is a trip, and I wouldn’t see a problem with it, except that with every trip, she became less and less of a Mom. My mom. She just became a shell of herself. After my infamous 16th birthday party, she took another trip. It lasted for two months. She left me alone to deal with everything and I hadn’t even done anything wrong. So no, I can’t associate trips with “self-care”, I associate them with trauma,” you laugh humorlessly.

“You came on this one.”

“Ah, but there are multiple factors to this one, Mr. Drysdale,” you smirk. “One, I would’ve felt terrible not going, because you planned all of this, so I already knew you’d spent entirely too much money on me. Two, I’m not alone. I’m with you and I love you. Three, I didn’t come along because I’m sad or running from something. If anything, I’m trying to figure us out and I’m happy to be here with you.”

“You are?”

“Ransom, I may be soft, but I still have a mind of my own. If I didn’t wanna be here, I wouldn’t be.”

“You love me enough to give me a real chance?”

“Unfortunately, yes.”

“Does that mean...?”

“It means that things are leaning more towards your favor than not, but we’ll wait until we get home.”

“That sounds promising.”

“Don’t get too far ahead of yourself,” you laugh as he kisses your forehead. “If I weren’t so damn happy, this would remind me of the time when my Mother left because-”

“We are here,” the driver announces as he comes to a stop and smiles at the both of you. “Such a young and lovely couple, I wish you all the best!”

“Thank you, we need all the help we can get,” you laugh with a smile, opening the door and getting out before Ransom has a chance to give some snarky response.

“Always stealing my thunder,” Ransom mutters as he follows your lead.

“I’m making the world a better pl-THE PALACE OF VERSAILLES?!”

“The trip wouldn’t have been complete without it.”

“Ransom-”

“It’s a tour, Sweet Thing. Everyone does it.”

“Honey-”

“Just enjoy it,” he laughs, wrapping an arm around your shoulder and dipping down to kiss your temple.

It’s not like it was hard.

You barely pay any attention to Ransom as practically skip from room to room, taking in the history of each room, and Ransom is fine to let you do that until hes had enough.

“What are you doing?!” you whisper yell as Ransom pulls you into a random room.

They’re all random since you’ve never been there.

“I told you that I’d behave until a certain point,” he smirks, kicking the door closed before he pinned you against the wall.

He would kick something in the fucking Palace of Versailles.

“Ransom-”

“I thought you loved making historical moments,” he chuckles as he undoes your shorts.

“They’ve probably got security cameras in here! We can’t...oh my GOD!” you mewl as he starts to play with your clit; his thumb being one of the most vicious toys that he uses.

His tongue being number one.

“Oh...fuck!”

“Be quiet or they’ll catch us,” he chuckles before starting to bite and suck on your neck.

“Daddy!” you mewl as softly as you can.

“Want me to make it all better?”

“Please!”

“Remember, Sweet Thing,” he coos as he gets on his knees and rips your panties off, “you gotta be quiet.”

And with that, he dives in like he hasn’t eaten a meal in years.

“Oh...oh shit! Ransom,” you whimper as you look down at him, his eyes telling you just how much he’s getting off on this. How much he needs it.

All he wants is to have the taste of you in his mouth all day, and you’re more than happy to give that to him. Two of his fingers tease your entrance and you do all you can to not scream and beg him to fuck you with them, and the devilish glint in his eyes lets you know just how much he loves how desperate you are to be good for him. When he does finally slide those two fingers in, you bite your bottom lip and clench your eyes shut to keep from yelling. Arching your back, you grip his hair and start grinding yourself almost his face, almost forgetting where you are.

Marie Antoinette would be so proud.

Ransom curls his fingers, finding that spongy spot inside of you that makes you blossom like a flower for him, and you swallow down your moan as you cum hard, trying your hardest to stay upright.

“So worried about security cameras, but you’re givin’ ‘em such a show, Sweet Thing,” Ransom broods darkly as he kisses his way up your body.

“Need it, daddy! Need you,” you whimper as you undo the front of his pants.

“Thought you wanted to be a good little girl?” he husks as he hoists you up and forces your legs around his waist.

“Fuck it,” you gasp as he thrusts himself inside of you.

Ransom is relentless as he fucks you hard and fast, not giving a single fuck if anyone walks in and catches you two.

“Please!,” you sob into his neck as you dig your nails into his shoulders.

“Feels so fucking good every time I’m deep inside you!”

“Daddy please!”

“Do you know how much I fucking love you? I would do anything for you! Anything to see you smile!”

“Aht! Baby...baby...that’s it!” you mewl into his neck before biting it.

“Fuck! The way this pussy squeezes me...give it to me! Want that fucking cream so bad!”

You moan into his neck as you cum hard, silently praying that no one heard you two, as spills his seed into you and fucks you both through your highs.

You really just had sex at the Palace of Versailles.

“You are nothing but trouble, Drysdale” you say with a breathy chuckle as he sets you down.

“Wanted to make sure the trip was historical for you,” he smirks.

“That’s a terrible joke,” you laugh as you lay your head on his shoulder.

“I love you, Y/N. I love you more than I can express.”

“I believe you.”

“I want to be with you. Really be with you. I want more trips with you, I want to come home to you, I want adventures with you...I want everything with you.”

“I know you do.”

“When will you trust me again?”

“It’s not just about trust, Ransom,” you sigh as squat down and pull up your shorts up and pass him your torn panties, “and you know that.”

“I told you that I’ll try.”

“And I told you that I need more time.”

“You know I’m never going to give up,” he mutters as he bends down and pulls up his briefs and shorts, before stuffing your panties into his pocket.

“Yeah, I know,” you laugh, “I won’t keep you in limbo for too much longer, okay? You know I love and want to be with you, I just....”

“Yeah, I know. I know,” he sighs.

“Lets just enjoy our last day, okay?”

“Anything you want,” he smiles at you before kissing you passionately.

“Stop, before you start round two.”

“You don’t know how hard it was for me to not tear that fucking tank top open.”

“Lets go,” you laugh as you lead the way and place your hand on the door.

“Y/N,” Ransom calls as he softly grabs your wrist.

“Yeah babe?”

“I do love you.”

“I love you,” you smile at him, “lets get back out there before we get caught.”

“I’m sure the whole palace heard us,” he smirks and you burst out laughing.

“Lets go, you.”

The rest of the tour is amazing, and judging by some of the looks thrown your way, you’re more than sure that people knew what you and Ransom had been up to. It doesn’t matter though, because the last two weeks have been heaven. Even with some of the arguments, the back and forth, and the fears that live rent free in your head. You’ve never been this happy, and you never thought that, in a million years, Hugh Ransom Drysdale would be the one to make you this happy. You know that things are going to be crazy when you get two get back, and while you’re not looking forward to it, you’re looking forward to Ransom being by your side for all of it.

You’re looking forward to finally letting yourself give him another try.

“Did you enjoy our little get away?” Ransom asks you two make your way down from the Eiffel Tower.

“I’m still trying to believe that all of this is real and not some dream that’s lasted much longer than it’s supposed to.”

“No, it’s very real,” he chuckles as he takes your hand in his. “If you’re so happy, why do you seem so far away?”

“I just...I want to say yes, Ransom. I want to let go of what happened and just start over, and that’s the direction I’m leaning towards but...”

“There’s still the fact that I’m a piece of shit,” he scoffs humorlessly.

“You’re not a piece of shit, Ransom. I never thought that before and I sure as shit don’t believe it now. However, the fact remains that you’ve done things that leave me...afraid. Trusting you...it’s not easy, Ransom. I trusted you before and it blew up in my face, on my fucking birthday, no less.”

“You know how much I want to take that back-”

“But you can’t, Ransom. No matter how much you want to, you can’t. I want to believe everything you say, because I love you more than I can explain, but I can’t. Yes, I believe that you love me and I believe that you want forever with me, but it doesn’t change the fact that you’ll use anyone to get what you want. Including me.”

“I won’t ever do something like that again, and I know-”

“You still did it in the first place, and that’s whats causing the issue. Me wanting to trust and being with you doesn’t cancel out the fact that I know exactly what you did, why you did it, and who you did it to,” you mumble as you two finally reach the last step.

Getting to the bottom of the Eiffel Tower is just as much of a pain in the ass as it is to get to the top.

“I’ll give you all the time you need to make your decision-”

“I don’t want anymore time, Ransom. You are who you are and I didn’t fall in love with you not knowing that. I am in love with you. I am so insanely in love with you and it scares me, because what the fuck am I going to do if you hurt me? If you leave me? I...want my forever to be with you, Ransom. God, I sound like a fucking airhead,” you laugh humorlessly as you grip his hand tighter. “I’ve thought about this so many times, and I keep thinking about all of the good that’s happened verses the bad and...the good outweighs the bad, I guess....I want to be with you. I wanna how the first few weeks go once we get back home, but I want...I want to be with you. Really be with you,” you smile up at him.

In one swift move, he’s picking you up and spinning you around, and you’re laughing into his shoulder and wrapping your arms around him tight.

“I guess it would’ve been more romantic to give this to you at the top of the Eiffel Tower,” he laughs as he sets you down, before digging in his pocket and pulling out a black velvet box.

“Ransom-”

“Relax, I’m not proposing. I didn’t get down on one knee, so I don’t know why you thought that was the case.”

“I don’t believe you’ll get down on one knee to propose.”

“My love for you will help me quiet my ego long enough for me to get down on one knee and propose,” he chuckles as he opens the box.

“Ransom...this is gorgeous,” you gasp and you hold up the sterling silver dragonfly necklace.

“I love you. I’m not easy to love, I’m rough around the edges, and I’m by no means innocent, but I’m all in with you. No lies, no more bets, no cheating, nothing. I want this to work because I love you more than you know and I’m...I’m committed to you. I’m committed to us,” he promises.

You wrap your arms around him and pull him close before getting on your tiptoes, and kissing him passionately.

He makes it so easy to get lost in him and forget. Forget that hell is waiting for you both when you get back to the states, forget that all of this is more complicated than it seems, and forget how scared you are. However, it’s not lost on you that you two are away, and things can easily change once you get home. Which is why you want to wait a few more weeks before you make anything official.

“Lets get back, huh?” he breaths once you two break apart.

“Please.”

The train ride back to London is torturous, because Ransom won’t keep his hands to himself, and you don’t want him to. The second you two are back inside the suite, Ransom is picking you up and carrying you to the bed, and you’re desperately trying to get his clothes off.

You two spend the rest of the evening in bed, making love and getting lost in one another. There’s no ‘daddy’, no slutty nicknames, no degrading, and no teasing. It’s just you and him telling each other just how much you both love and need one another, and how much you both just want each other forever. At some point, he orders room service, but you both only take a few bites of your food before he’s pulling you back into bed.

“We need to pack,” you yawn as you two cuddle up to another, finally ready to call it a night.

“I’ll take care of it, don’t worry about it.”

“What does that even mean?”

“It means that you need to rest and not worry about things that don’t matter.”

“Ransom?”

“Hmm?”

“Tell me you mean it when you tell me you want everything with me forever.”

“I mean it with every inch of my being, and I’m more than happy to spend the rest of my life showing you that.”

“I love you, Ransom.”

“I love you, Sweet Thing,” he tells you softly before kissing your forehead, “get some rest.”

As you drift off to sleep, you hope that the magic you two have found follows you both back to Massachusetts. You hope that you two can make this work for real and make it last.

**

“Why can’t you just stay over?” Ransom whines as he drives to his house. “Because,” you laugh as your phone goes off for the millionth time, “I like my house...Jesus, who knew one picture could get so many likes? I’m turning off my notifications,” you grumble as you fish it out of your purse.

Before you both headed back to the airport, you made a small photo set on your Insta account, with the caption:

Y/N Account Name: Took a little trip to my favorite place with my favorite person :)

Which Daisy was quick to comment with:

YourDadsBestFriend69: You go to Europe and get dicked down once, and I lose my title. This is bullshit.

You’re all set to turn off your notifications when you see that Marta has followed you. You tapped on username, but it was private. However, you did see her holding a small hand in her profile picture.

Did she have a baby?

When you go back to your notifications, her follow isn’t there anymore, which makes you all that much more confused. You let your curiosity get the best of you and go over to Ransom’s page and tapped on the photo set he posted of you.

You look through the very colorful comments until you find what you’re looking for:

M_Cab89: We’ll see if that’s the case when you get back.

Alright, what the fuck is going on?

“Are you listening to me?” Ransom asks, pulling you out of your thoughts.

“Huh? What? No, I’m sorry, what did you say?”

“The car should be delivered in two days.”

“You didn’t have to buy me the car, Ransom,” you laugh with a sigh.

“You like the car and now you’ll have it.”

“You don’t have to buy me everything-”

“We were still on the trip. The trip that I took great joy in spoiling you on. I was happy to do it.”

“You should’ve let me buy you the watch.” “I have too many watches,” he scoffs as he turns onto his street. “I’ll run inside, grab some clothes, and we’ll head back to your place...awh, what the shit?!” he gripes as he parks his car in his gravel driveway.

Why are Marta and Linda here? Who the hell is that little boy?

“What the fuck is this about?” he mutters, opening his door and getting out before slamming it shut.

Great.

“Ransom, calm down,” you sigh, getting out and following after him.

“It’s bad enough that either one of them is here, but them together? And who the fuck is that little kid?” he growls.

“Ransom, please.”

“What do you want, Mother?” he snaps, malice in his tone as he reaches his doorstep.

There’s no way that is going to end well.

“Don’t speak to me in that tone!”

“You’re at my house-”

“That Harlan got you-”

“What do you want?” he mutters.

“So, it’s true? You’re with her now?” Linda sasses as she looks you over.

“It really doesn’t concern you. What do you-”

“You planned your trip during my birthday, didn’t even bother to call-”

“Why should I? It’s not like you wanted me there anyway-”

“I’m your Mother, you ungrateful little shit!” she interrupts, slapping him hard.

“No!” you snap, standing in front of Ransom, “you don’t get to hit him! I don’t care that he’s your son, you don’t treat him like that! Especially because he’s your son,” you growl, a threatening finger pointed directly at her face.

The shit eating grin that comes to her face makes your stomach churn.

“When I got here, Marta was already here with that little guy. Seems like you can’t keep either of your whores in line.”

There’s no fucking way...

“What are you talking about? I don’t-”

“He’s your son, Ransom,” Marta interjects, stepping aside, so little boy can be seen.

You can’t breathe.

“The fuck he is!”

“Watch your mouth!”

“He’s not my son and this isn’t fucking funny!”

“We can take a test if you want, but he is your son!”

The comment she left under his pictures makes so much sense now.

“Well, I don’t want him! You wait...however many years to tell me about him, and you sure as shit don’t need any money, so why now?!”

“He deserves to know who his Father is, Ransom! He’s a Drysdale and-”

“Watch it,” Ransom warns with a foreboding tone.

You look at him in pure and utter shock. You know that he can be an asshole, but this is just cruel. He has a point though, why did Marta wait until now? There were multiple times to tell Ransom, including when she was pregnant, but she waited till he posted you? Is that why she went on your page? To see if there was something more? To see if we were both serious about each other?

“It’s not enough that you had to take this whore to London and miss my birthday, but now you have a bastard with the help? God, you don’t know how to stop yourself from fucking up, do you?” Linda spits.

This time, you’re the one slapping her while angry tears roll down your cheek, and Linda looks at you in pure shock.

“I’ll press charges!”

“Go ahead,” you mutter before turning and walking away.

“Y/N, please don’t go,” Ransom calls, following after you and grabbing your wrist, and you instantly pull out of his hold. “Sweet Thing-”

“Don’t call me that.”

“Please, lets talk about this!”

“I can’t be here right now, Ransom. I just can’t.”

“Where do you wanna go? We can anywhere you want!”

“I need to get away from you!” you yell, turning to face him for just a brief moment, but it was long enough to see the pain in his eyes.

The universe just couldn’t give you a fucking win, could it?

“Please-”

“I can’t talk to you right now. I have to go. I’ve gotta get the fuck out of here.”

You’re quick to grab your purse and cell phone from his car, before you’re walking off in the direction of your home.

The second you can’t see them anymore, you burst into tears.

You were just too fucking happy. You finally felt comfortable enough to explore things with Ransom, you were so ready to say yes and fully commit, and now there’s all this shit. What the fuck are you supposed to do now? No, he by all means did not have the right response to any of what just took place, but e was caught completely off guard, and it really does seem like Marta did this out of spite.

Linda help a single fucking thing.

You stop in at the liquor store and pick up four bottles of tequila, along with four packs of cigarettes, and completely ignore the stares and whispers that are coming your way.

None of it fucking matters anyway.

As your items are being scanned, only one thought keeps going through your mind: why did you have to fall in love with Hugh Ransom Drysdale?

~~

taglist: @emerald-evans​, @maroonsunrise83​, @whiskeytangofoxtrot555​, @companionjones​, @autumnrose40​, @fuckingbye​, @pono-pura-vida​, @nomadstucky​, @mazda098​, @chemtrails-club​, @bree-lyrie​

[ohdeerradiodemon]

(Inspired by this post, I 100% had to add my own thoughts as I adopt this headcanon as well, because it's such an incredible idea! You're a genius @shootinwebs!)

Alastor has (undiagnosed) temporal lobe epilepsy that developed when he was alive (and still has now in his afterlife)

details about the disease and comorbidities that are likely under the cut

Temporal lobe epilepsy developed in Alastor’s early 20s

Was a result of a traumatic brain injury at some point in his late teens

Somewhere between a medial and lateral origin site within the brain, resulting in combined side effects

During a temporal lobe seizure, a person may experience a seizure aura; an aura is an autonomic, cognitive, emotional or sensory experience that commonly occurs during the beginning part of a seizure.

Alastor’s auras may include:

rising epigastric feeling

abdominal discomfort

gustatory and olfactory hallucinations

tingling (somatosensory)

déjà vu and jamais vu

flushing

vertigo

humming/ringing/buzzing sounds in ears

hearing song(s) (particularly ones he tended to play on his show)

A person may then stare blankly, appear motionless (behavioral arrest) and lose awareness. Repeated stereotyped motor behaviors (automatisms) may occur. Alastor’s automatisms include: repeated swallowing, picking, and/or vocalizations. Visual hallucinations can also occur. Loss of awareness may occur (he might not realize he even had a seizure until he comes out of it.) Although, he’s never had convulsive seizures.

Temporal lobe migraines have resulted over time as well

It was never properly diagnosed, as it was something he heavily ignored and didn’t draw attention to at all (therefore it was left untreated)

Psychiatric co-morbidities:

Psychosis/Alice in Wonderland Syndrome

AIWS – episodic, which means it’s not a consistent thing. It can happen randomly, and the instances are few and far between

Type C – including symptoms from both Type A and B (visual/perceptual distortions)

Partial or total macrosomatognosia/paraschematia (a disorder of the body image in which the patient perceives a part of or the entire body as disproportionately larger than it actually is)

Micropsia (viewing objects and the environment around them as much smaller than they actually are) and/or tele- and pelopsia (viewing things as much farther or closer than they actually are)

Lilliputianism (people appearing smaller)

Depersonalization/derealization (a feeling of disconnection from one's own body, feelings, thoughts, and environment. Depersonalization is a term specifically used to express a true detachment from their personal self's and identity)                                                                 

Hearing and time distortions (sound perception - amplification of soft sounds or the misinterpretation of common sounds. Other auditory changes include distortion in pitch and tone and hearing indistinguishable and strange voices, noises, or music. A person affected by AIWS may also lose a sense of time, a problem similar to the lack of spatial perspective brought on by visual distortion. This condition is known as tachysensia. For those with tachysensia, time may seem to pass very slowly)

Personality co-morbidities:

Geschwind syndrome

Hypergraphia is the tendency for extensive and compulsive writing or drawing. Those with hypergraphia display extreme attention to detail in their writing. Some such patients keep diaries recording meticulous details about their everyday lives. In certain cases, these writings demonstrate extreme interest in religious topics. These individuals also tend to have poor penmanship.

Hyperreligiosity - characterized by increased, usually intense, religious feelings and philosophical interests. Some auras include ecstatic experiences. These religious feelings can motivate beliefs within any religion, including voodoun

Atypical or altered sexuality - in approximately half of affected individuals hyposexuality is reported.

Circumstantiality - tend to continue conversations for a long time and talk repetitively.

Intensified mental life - including deepened cognitive and emotional responses. This tendency may pair with hypergraphia, leading to prolific creative output and a tendency toward intense, solitary pursuits

Many of these symptoms manifested in his demon form in his afterlife

He never complained about hearing music during an episode and now everyone gets to hear it too

The other auditory hallucinations manifested as Alastor being something of a living radio in his afterlife, using radio static and music as a way to express himself

He still suffers from seizures in the afterlife and still continues to never draw attention to it unless someone actually catches him having one in which case he plays it off as not being a big deal and being unbothered by it (this is a bold-faced lie)

[generalluxun]

Inspired by my last ask, but yeah Sabrina & Chloe's friendship is fascinating if one looks at it from the early series.

Cos its easy to write off as the classic "Rich kid and their beleaguered modern day serf" but it very much isn't.

Off the cuff is that both of them enjoyed their nastier behavior, rather than one being pulled into it by the other.

Then that both girls can be so upset by their relationship fraying that they risk being akumatized, which means there is 100% mutual affection there regardless of any other differences.

Then there is, as you pointed out, the fact Chloe tends to buy Sabrina's affection with gifts, use presents as a form of apology, or compensation for homework. This is also however something Sabrina is very consciously aware of and is a system she's 'rewarded' in a sense for participating in and she's willing to hold back her role in the relationship if it suits her.

It is not strictly a good or healthy relationship to say the least but it feels more mutually messed up than I feel is often presented.

Then there is their own general head-spaces to consider.

Sabrina definitely knows Chloe has the stronger personality & wealth, while she generally less confident & well off.

Chloe's meanwhile is intensely defensive, has abonnement issues & needs Sabrina more than Sabrina needs presents.

What's more because of said aforementioned mean-streaks, both are likely fearful of what would happen if the other turned on them. Chloe may have the resources, but she is also a public figure much more vulnerable to scandal. So there's probably always a little voice in their heads, but especially Chloe's thinking "What if she turns on me?"

Which would naturally weaken any intimacy or safety they can feel around one another. Not to the point where its absent. But definitely to the point where there is a balancing act between protecting one's self, showing they care & expressing vulnerability or need.

& that's just their willingness to communicate/trust, it doesn't even approach differing understandings of social norms, class structure, love languages or general emotional intelligence.

Chloé&Sabrina's friendship is definitely a thing, and it *is* a friendship. It's just unhealthy because *lookit how Chloé was not raised*

I give Sabrina a little less 'enjoyment' angle out of being mean. She enjoyed the praise/positive reinforcement it got her, but not the acts themselves. She's not a forceful personality initially. Going along is her M.O.

Yes she was willing to break with Chloé that one time, everyone gets angry at friends now and then. Marinette also (inappropriately) egged her on. Seriously- presenting sucks. I gladly did more work writing/researching a group project as long as someone else stood in front of the class to do the talking.

[tofautisawa]

Sorry for opening a can of worms, but you mentioned a certain lion indie project did damage on how people view lions and lion media. I was just curious on why you say that.

Hoo boy this is gonna be a long post. I was mostly vaguing on how it's a possibility that My Pride may have skewed people's perception on lion behavior as well as how and what people might people expect from lion media by smaller creators, especially if they are a younger audience who might take everything that happens in it as 100% accurate to lion behavior. Let's not pretend that it's creator didn't influence and inspired a lot of people.

It's a bit of a stretch, I know and I am mostly speaking through experience of what I witnessed in the comments of my own comic and what I have seen towards online media that happens to have lions in it. It has basically died down now, so what I am mentioning was when My Pride was pretty much in it's prime. Thankfully, I didn't get it the worst but I can't say the same for some others. From what I recall, My Pride advertised itself as "The Lion King but realistic", and even though I feel they messed up that "realistic" aspect part, it wouldn't bother me as much if people didn't act like lion media they discover afterwards somehow has to operate exactly the freaking same or that My Pride is the pinnacle of realistic lion behavior so if you step outside of what is portrayed as "Pride Law" in your own works, it's gets questioned or people will flat out say it's incorrect. Pride Law was even brought up when Silver and Gatura had their fight for example even though no such thing even exists in my comic, and a comment mentioned that males will fight til one of them dies which I have never seen in a one on one fight, even if it did happen most of the time the losing male will retreat. But it happened in My Pride so Silver running away is unrealistic I guess. And no, Pride Law getting some things right about lions at a surface level doesn't NOT count. Just because lions commit infantcide in real life doesn't mean My Pride portrayal of it is 100% accurate because the circumstances on WHY they are doing it isn't realistic nor does it make a lick of sense. Don't get me started when people referred to my male lion characters as "manes". Ugh...

Anyway.... Given that Tau ( and by a lesser extent, Silver) get questioned on how they even have prides because they aren't aggressive who killed to get where they are, I can't help but wonder if this is just the standard now because every single male in My Pride ( if they weren't killed off) was a dick. And since "PRUYDE LAHW" states that a male lion's role in a pride is to lead and protect the pride, you couldn't POSSIBLY have a pride in your own works where the roles are reversed and the lionesses are the main protectors. Or that a lioness can simply have a male in a pride for no other reason other than she loves him and isn't just laying around having his cubs because of some "rules".

Speaking of lionesses, you'd be surprised at how many people now think that lionesses will in no way defend their cubs when another male shows up or hell, join in the fight themselves. I feel like people would not have criticized Tau's pride so much if HE was the aggressor and Ekene just sat being submissive because that is what is expected because something popular that claimed to be realistic portrayed it as such. As well as thinking that lionesses are completely weak pathetic creatures made out of wet toilet paper that even if they completely outnumber a single male, he could somehow beat them all without getting a scratch on his body. Nevermind that in real life, lionesses have been known to even turn on their males and kill them.

And some other things that probably escape my mind right now because this post is getting long, and I am just bitching at this point because I been holding back these opinions for quite a while now. Like I said, I know this is a huge stretch and most of it probably stems from my own bitterness. So I will be fair in this aspect, Even though I feel like the creator should not have advertised this as "realistic" since My Pride is HEAVY on the fantasy elements and tries to tackle issues like Homophobia- I know it's not 100% the shows fault and that people themselves should learn to separate different medias unless a creator flat out states that said media they are doing takes place in the My Pride universe or was inspired by it. My comic is definitely not inspired by My Pride, especially since I first started this comic long before it came out and while some thing have changed about my story over the years, the same major story beats were already planned and there was no "Pride Law" around to even influence that, not that it would have regardless.

[roo-bastmoon]

Quickie (but important) thingies

I've got like 15 minutes in between CT scans so of course I'm on my phone checking on Jikook because the crazy obsession is baked into my DNA by now. Y'all caught me.

Good news: Jimin is linked back up on Spotify. Well done, ARMY, for raising the red flag high and helping get this fixed today!! Let's always have Jimin's and BTS' backs!

Interesting news: It seems that folks Shazamed JK's behind the scenes video and the song that came up is called H-Thirteen (I can't check because the hospital won't let me access YouTube links). Can anyone confirm?

Request: I'm totally not trying to gaslight, minimize, or police anyone's fandom experience. But it feels like folks are on a hair's trigger out here these days. I get it, especially when it comes to Jimin. He has suffered so many insults over the years.

But before we assume Jungkook is a thief or plagiarist, before we assume his music video will be raunchy, before we assume the worst of any member, could we just hold out a bit for more information? It is possible all these concept choices for Seven are an homage to Jimin and Face. (I'm going to especially think this is so, if the song in the background is number-coded to Jimin and Jikook.)

It seems to me that Jimin has always been Jungkook's inspiration--perhaps even his muse.

And I'm not saying we have to blindly trust or believe the best in everyone. (I mean, I do, but that's me.)

Honestly? I have no great love of Hybe at the moment. I have too many suspicions around all the things that happened after Jimin's Hot 100 #1. But the people who work there are just people; I'm sure most are good and some are jerks, just like anywhere.

The members are also human beings. And human beings are always works in progress.

So I just would like to ask that if something a tannie is doing seems alarming, we say "Hm, that seems alarming!" rather than scream with our whole chests that a member is actively trying to hurt or sabotage another member. Especially when we've had years and years of evidence that BTS really love and trust each other.

Look, every member has flaws; they will make mistakes--sometimes big ones, as they grow. And we have a right to criticize behaviors we don't like. But I guess because of my past family life, I am personally triggered whenever someone automatically assumes mal-intent without asking any questions or waiting for more info to come to light.

Not saying we have to love everyone, or we can't call a spade a spade. I guess I'm just recommending we give a little grace until we get the whole story. I see folks on the timeline who just love Jimin so much, who fear the worst because of the lack of transparency or explanations. My heart beats with you, but I encourage you to hold on a bit longer. Let's see what Jimin has to say about all this.

It's entirely possible that Jungkook saw the way Jimin's hard work and sexy style was amazing but unappreciated by the company and he decided to pay respect to that with his single because he knows he's got the social capital to insist on it.

It's possible that stylists and marketing teams think these looks are the hot, sexy, edgy trends for this year and went with it.

I suppose it's also technically possible that Jungkook decided to "rip off" Jimin's style... and go all-in on payola for radio (which isn't confirmed yet)... and also lean heavily into a straight-acting macho-man raunchy music video (again, not out yet) -- but until we are very sure of any of that, may I ask that we speculate instead of accuse?

If it turns out anyone did Jimin dirty, I promise you I will grab my torch and pitchfork and be second in line (behind Hobi) to rage. But for our own health as a community, and as individuals combatting our own stressors, could we... could we just hang in there and give ourselves some time to do our due diligence before we assume evil or selfish intentions? That's my request.

(Caveat: of course--your blogs, your rules. You get to say anything you want in your space and I will never police you. If I'm really worried about something you're saying or doing, I'll just ask you about it directly. But I won't shade you, I promise. I'm just gently asking us to withhold judgement until we figure out what actually is going on. I hope that sounds reasonable and not condescending. I truly do value different perspectives and would absolutely love to count every person in the Jikook tag as a friend, even if we wildly disagree on things. So please don't read this post as me trying to be harsh or holier than thou. I'm simply trying to say: let's judge based on what is, not on what appears to be true.)

Ah, time to put more dye in my veins. Got to go. Love to you all!

P.S. Jimin smiling so happily while killing it in TikTok challenges is panacea.