#this gifset fought me like no other

[tardxsblues]

THE DOCTOR AND CLARA IN INTO THE DALEK

[demadogs]

i always say i dont want a book to have a screen adaptation out of fear of them doing it dirty and then i think of the most perfect casting ever for the main character and im like FUCK now i wont sleep until i see this happen

[neyafromfrance95]

i know a lot of people think pre-raft sauron flashback was unnecessary but listen, hear me out! IT WAS ACTUALLY SO IMPORTANT!

it was important for establishing one more fateful connection between sauron and galadriel!

those scenes parallel too perfectly (just look at how identical they look side by side in the gifsets/edits) for a reason!!!

we now have an understanding of what was going through sauron's head when galadriel told him that her closest friend conspired and her company mutinied against her bc she couldn't stop fighting and they could no longer distinguish her from the evil she fought!

she was like a perfect mirror to him, the only other being capable of truly understanding him!

BECAUSE SHE IS!!!

they both were so desperate in their pursuit of their ambitions that they disregarded the lives of the people who followed them and led them to their deaths! they were fully aware of what they were doing and rationalized it! bc it was all "for the better world". they just couldn't stop and their closest allies (elrond/adar) recognized their very adversaries in them (sauron in galadriel, morgoth in sauron). and they both knew that but pridefully held onto the belief that they were breaking the cycle and creating a better reality for the middle earth!

sauron recognized the same unhinged spirit that he has in galadriel! and probably for the first time in his life, he felt empathy and regret, the regret for ever having contributed in hurting HER! and while galadriel won't admit this, the only person capable of sympathizing with her ways is sauron!

[corazondebeskar-reads]

all I did was what I had to - part one

all I did was what I had to miniseries

part one: all I did was what I had to

series masterlist | part one | part two | part three

dark!Joel Miller x f!reader

Word Count: 2.1k

Summary: A newcomer to Joel's group of raiders makes a pass at you. Joel reinforces his dominance.

Warnings: DARK. dead dove do not eat. raider!Joel is not a good man, dark!Joel Miller, mention of past assault (not by Joel), dub-con due to power imbalance and implied captivity, reader can have a little stockholm syndrome as a treat. watersports, piss drinking, canon-typical violence, gore, piv intercourse, unsafe sex, oral (m receiving), oral (f receiving), bit of both game and show joel, sorta d/s dynamics I guess, not RACK compliant

Originally written for Kinktober 2023 - Day 4 - Overstimulation / Human Urinal, inspired by this prompt list from @absurdthirst and this gifset from @a7estrellas. I did not come up with raider/hunter!Joel or dark!Joel and many great writers have built in this sandbox before me.

also on ao3

You’d like to say that six months ago, when the group of raiders “took you in,” you would have fought tooth and nail to avoid this situation. You wished you could say you ever really fought back at all.

But after Joel Miller had found you in a supply room during a raid, sobbing and struggling under a FEDRA officer, you had never even so much as told him no. Not after he pulled the man—your husband, who had been starving and abusing you since your wedding night three weeks ago—off your aching body and pummeled his face into the ground. When all that was left was pulp, he had helped you to your feet with bloodied hands. 

“You okay?” he said. His furrowed brow and cold eyes told you he was dangerous more than the corpse on the ground, as his concern was for you alone, entirely barren of remorse or disgust. 

You nodded, but the tremor of your hands betrayed you. He shucked off his jacket and helped you into it, numb as you were, and zipped it up. It was long enough to give you the illusion of modesty since your clothes were nowhere to be found.

He had led you down the stairs and outside, crowding you into the passenger seat of a dented, rusty pickup.

“Wait here,” he said, shutting the door. 

And you had. 

Now, you were knelt between Joel’s heavy boots in the living room of the main safe house. He was sprawled on the main sofa, beer in one hand and the other on the back of your head. The others were milling about, drinking shitty moonshine, and enjoying the spoils of today’s raid. 

You had an old, soft flannel on and Joel’s thick cock in your throat. He was holding you there, motionless, while your eyes stung and watered. Every so often, he’d guide you to bob up and down or shove your face down to lick his balls. He was dragging it out, savoring it in a rare display of luxury. 

Their haul today meant easy living for a couple months after striking an unfortunate band of Fireflies. After the slaughter, they had returned with crates and cases of supplies. You, however, had spent the last two days locked in your room upstairs.

The upper floor of the house was Joel’s. The door at the foot of the stairs locked from both directions, the sole key to which never left the chain around his neck. Your little room had a mattress and a door to a Jack and Jill bathroom. Joel’s room, where you actually spent most of your time, was on the other side. But it had been locked, and you had been left with plenty of food and water but absolutely nothing to do. 

So when Joel came home in a better mood than you’d ever seen him, you jumped at the opportunity to go downstairs. He didn’t like you down there most of the time, didn’t like anyone seeing you but him, unless he was putting on a show of dominance.

Like now. Your quiet obedience on full display, a reminder that even in a time of prosperity, Joel Miller was still the king. 

He took the last swig of his beer and handled the bottle off to a lackey (you didn't see them enough to tell them apart, or care enough to learn their names). He let go of your hair and gave your cheek two sharp pats, smirking when you scrambled to please him. Your hands had been clasped behind your back where they belonged, but he was ready to cum, so you wrapped one around the base of his cock and massaged his balls with the other, using your throat as roughly as he would.

This was second nature, now. The only days you went without his cock in your mouth were the days he was away on raids. When you had woken that morning without the ache in your jaw and throat, you had been sad. (Whatever that said about your life now wasn’t something you wanted to think about too hard.)

Saliva coated your fingers where they grasped the very root of him, smearing on your face as you buried him as deep within you as possible. Tears scorched your cheeks as you gagged and struggled to remember to breathe through your nose. 

He snapped his fingers in your face, drawing not just your eyes to his but capturing the attention of everyone else in the room. He held your gaze and your head in place as hot ropes of cum shot down your throat. 

Drained, he let you up, a lazy grin spreading as you coughed and sobbed for a moment. 

“Shit,” said one of the newer recruits, too young and stupid to survive for long. “I call next.”

The tension in the room was immediate. One of Joel’s smarter lackeys stepped away from the splatter zone. He was, after all, sporting a new denim jacket from the haul. 

Joel held your eyes for a moment before slowly looking up at the offender. He rose, forcing you to scramble back a few inches to make room. His flaccid cock was eye level with you now, but you didn’t dare look away from his face. The satisfied grin had sharpened, his dark eyes clear and dangerous. 

“Yeah? You want her to suck you off?” Joel drawled.

How this man had lived to his mid-twenties astounded you. He was making eye contact with a predator with apparently zero awareness of the danger. 

“Fuck yeah, man,” said the future corpse. 

Joel dragged his eyes back down to you. “Open up, sweetheart.” 

The other man made to move toward you, but Joel raised one finger and waited while you opened your mouth, tongue out. Your heart was racing. You didn’t believe he would actually let someone else touch you, but there was still a sharp jolt of fear.

Joel took himself in hand, lifting your chin up with the other. He cocked an eyebrow at you—not seeking permission, but granting a warning. You realized what he was about to do right before it happened, tensing every muscle to fight the instinct to snap your mouth shut.

It wasn’t the first time Joel had pissed in your mouth, but that didn’t make the acrid stream any more pleasant. It burned your raw throat on the way down. He didn’t look away from you, thumb stroking your jaw gently. When he finished, he held his cock out for you to lick the tip clean. You pressed a soft kiss, offering forgiveness he didn’t require, and sat back on your heels.

He looked up at the other man, waving a loose arm in your direction. “Ya still want her?” 

“You’re fucked up,” the newcomer said, shaking his head. “That’s fucking disgusting.”

Joel laughed and pulled your head to his thigh, one ear pressed against it and his large palm over the other. You squeezed your eyes shut just in time as he drew his pistol and shot the man in the crotch in one fluid moment. The bang still jolted you, and you pressed your face harder into Joel’s rough jeans. 

He took his hand off your ear to stroke your cheek. “Get him out of here,” he barked at one of the others, who immediately dragged the screaming, writhing man out of the house. 

Joel squatted down, hands on your shoulders. “You okay?” He inspected you, brushing his hands over “your” shirt to make sure none of the viscera had reached you. 

You nodded, though you were shaking a little and forcing slow, wavering breaths in and out. 

“That’s my girl,” he said, brushing a thumb over your swollen lips. He stood up and helped you up, leading you upstairs without another glance at his men. 

Your hand grasped tight in his rough, calloused palm, and he led you to his room, where you sat on the edge of the bed, eyes downcast.

He toed off his boots and slid his belt out of the loops of his jeans. “Don’t worry, baby. We’ll wash the taste outta your mouth.” 

You looked up to watch him shuck off his gray t-shirt, captivated by the way it peeled off his biceps and fluttered to the floor. It was followed quickly by his jeans and boxers. His cock sprung free, hard again already after the thrilling turn of events.

You made to slide to your knees, but he clicked his tongue at you. “C’mon, I ain’t that mean. Lay back, sweetheart. You did so good out there for me.”

You obeyed, ass perched on the edge, knees bent and legs spread wide, braced against the footboard. He stepped between your legs, running a hand over your stomach.

“Look at you, princess, you’re soaked.” The crooked smirk returned as he lightly dragged a finger through your wet folds. “You liked that?” 

A wretched flush overtook you from your face to your chest, ears burning. You looked away, but the sharp tsk brought your eyes back to him. 

“Don’t hide from me,” his voice pitched low and dark, the drawl always thicker when he was stalking prey. “It’s a good thing, baby. Tell me why you’re dripping.”

“Felt safe,” you murmured, blushing harder. “I like bein’ yours.” 

He grinned and pushed his thumb down on your clit, watching as you gasped and jerked.

“Good girl,” he said and sank to his knees.

He chuckled, watching your eyes grow wide. He didn’t want to spoil you, so this was a rare treat. He spread you with two fingers, licking a wide stripe from your cunt to your clit. Your hips jerked, and he lay an arm over them, pinning you down as you sobbed a long moan. 

A rare treat, but a divine one. He ate you out like you were the first oasis in the desert. Licking and sucking, plunging three fingers deep into your pussy until you fell apart on his tongue. And he didn’t stop, teeth nipping at your clit until the aftershocks of your orgasm crested smoothly into another. And another. You were sobbing full out, thrashing to pull away from the suffocating pain and pleasure, but he held you in place until the sixth orgasm left you sprawled, loose-limbed, eyes dazed. 

“That’s it, baby,” he crooned, standing up and raising your knees to your chest. You hadn’t the strength to move where he wanted, but he was more than happy to manhandle your pliant, soft body. 

Your eyes fluttered open when he notched the fat head of his cock at your entrance, only to roll back and shut again when he pushed into the hilt in one smooth stroke. You were slick, and he had stretched you with his fingers (another luxury you weren’t always awarded), but the sheer size of him never failed to take your breath away.

There was no slow, gentle sex with Joel. Only the rough, demanding pace he set immediately, hands bruising your already mottled hips. It didn’t take long, him having already spent once that day and your body in no condition to handle a long session. When he began to flood your cunt with his warmth, he reached down and pinched your clit, twisting cruelly. Your scream was loud but broken, rough with overuse, as he ripped another orgasm from you. 

He slipped out and crawled onto the mattress, gently moving you up to rest against the pillows with him. “Open,” he said, tapping at your jaw. 

You let your mouth fall open, not a spare thought in your brain, as he made good on the promise to wash the taste of his piss out. Reaching between your legs, he scooped up a glob of your mixed juices, bringing them to your tongue. You automatically closed your lips around him, sucking and licking. He repeated the motion twice more until he was satisfied, then pulled you in for a deep kiss, chasing the taste of both your pleasures. 

It wasn’t until after he lulled you to sleep, brushing the sweat from your brow, that he pulled his clothes back on and crept out of the room.

Outside, his men had tied the injured sonofabitch around the wrists and slung the rope over a solid branch, his feet just barely dragging on the mud below.

He jolted alert as Joel approached and began sobbing in fear. Joel spit at his feet.

“Shame you didn’t bleed out already,” Joel said, drawing his finger along the blade of his favorite knife. The blood pooled on Joel’s fingertip, dripping down to his wrist. 

The other man watched, eyes wide with terror, and began screaming around the rag in his mouth. 

“I mean, a shame for you,” Joel said, with a shrug and a quirk of his lips. “I’m gonna have a real good time, though.”

*title from "There's No 'I' in Team" by Taking Back Sunday.

[girllookingoutwindow]

I just love when Colin shows Penelope where they are going to live after they marry.

It’s so good

Hi, anon. It's very good. But I think he's to anxious about everything. Like, boy child out, poor girl, it's too much for her in one day .

And makes me wonder about time. I mean, he planned this, when? He was thinking about it before even asked her I assumed. Everything he does, it goes very well with his obsession. Like, he asked her to marry him, he spoke with his family, he fought with Portia, and then boom house and baby in just one day. He knew what he wanted that's for sure.

I think will need one year to process all that. And I have a dirty mind who question herself if he didn't have dirty intentions going there. I'm not saying he did, just maybe?

I was doing a gifset about it the other day but for some reason I didn't finished. Maybe later.

Love it, it was romantic too. A great hero gesture, lol, and it's goes well with drama queen chaos Colin.

Thanks for writing, ♥️

[wistfulwatcher]

I agree 100% with the tags on your gifset of Misty looking to Nat for approval. I think we start really seeing it in the teen timeline earlier but Misty pledging herself to Nat when Nat was crowned the antler queen is like, just a formal pledge. She's solidifying what was already there. Nat wasn't the antler queen when she chose to save her over Javi. Nat was the one being hunted for sport, and Misty could've run over to her to finish the job. Or help Javi and then finish the job. But nope, she just went straight to pulling Nat off of him and telling her if she doesn't run the others WILL kill her. Nat was also the first person to jump in front of Misty and defend her to Shauna after Shauna punched her in 2.07 so I'm sure that helped Misty glom onto her a bit lol

Fully agree, this is my reasoning as well! I do also believe that Nat and Misty have always had a level of understanding as outcasts - I think Misty always saw her as "safer" than the other girls, and I think Nat could understand Misty in ways that allowed her to be more tolerant than others because she understood where Misty's need for acceptance comes from. (Though, the other side of that is, I think Nat also got more frustrated with Misty because she understands what it's like to be an outcast, except Nat leaned into it where Misty fought against it - in the sense of, "if it was so easy for me to be different, why can't you just do the same?") And not that it was official/canon in the show, but at least some of the actresses (I think Christina and/or Juliette, but could have been Sammi/Soapy too) have mentioned there being that sort of understanding, where Nat was always nicer to Misty than the others were.

I also, on the less romantic side, do think that Misty is just too pragmatic to not see Nat's value (even pre-wilderness). I think she has always seen Natalie as someone important to have around, and since she is such a practical person I think her emotional responses are sort of tied up in her pragmatism; in fact, I would argue that practicality is inherently romantic for her. So Misty has the - arguably, as a hunter - most useful person in the group, who understands her, and is kind to her (even if distantly), and then defends her? And on top of that, is indebted to Misty (at least as far as Misty is concerned) for saving her life? That is a romantic-pragmatic mashup feast for Misty.

So I definitely think the seeds of her attachment and obsession were there far before the coronation. (Sorry Christina. I agree with 99% of what you say, but not this.) And I agree, the pledge was really just a formal commitment, and more of a conscious decision for what she would already have done subconsciously. I think that moment of Misty looking up is very much things clicking into place for her, like that it's okay to appreciate and care for Natalie the way she does, because now she's her queen. (Not to mention that Misty is neck-deep in comphet. Her being given this tool - this religion, this coronation - that not just allows her to feel the way she does, but encourages it?) I don't see anyone bending the knee with the fervor she did without the seeds being there beforehand.

[khaopybara]

tag game ✨

@mbjw saved me from saturday boredom and tagged me in this, so thank you jubs, i enjoyed these a lot.

1. why did you choose your url?

i love khaotung. khaotung was obsessed with the capybara song last year before i even knew who he was. capybaras happen to be a very common animal in the region i live. i was very happy they were getting the recognition they deserved. put them together, we have lovely khao + capybaras = khaopybara (i'm also super sure i've seen people here and on tw use this and i just stole it. i'm not creative especially when it comes to usernames).

2. any sideblogs? if you have them name them and why you have them.

i have two other sideblogs. @tuseryoo for all of the gifs i make so i can have all of them in one blog just because, so i feel like i'm not losing track of the things i create (even though i haven't updated that one in a while), and @captain-xandis that some moots might have noticed in their notifications bc i recently created that one to post gifs about critical role, but i always forget to check which blog appears on top of the thingy, so i'm constantly deleting and reblogging things in the right blog these days.

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

as of july 3rd, i've been here for 11 years now, so since 2013? which tracks with my super strong k-pop phase tbh.

4. do you have a queue tag?

nah, i have a queue going for gifs that are requests or for episodes that already aired, but usually i just post things whenever.

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

ha, i was into super junior. and i was experimenting with fandom for the first time at the time. that's it. i felt like tumblr was a lot more creative and pretty than twitter or facebook, so i stayed.

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

i am a mook defender and apologist. i also think aya is super cute and super pretty. i change icons so often though, i blame all the pretty women in qls these days for making me change it all the time.

7. why did you choose your header?

i am breathing and living for the heart killers and kantbison and unfortunately i'm dying from lack of content. the tattoo table kiss is going to change lives i think, so until we don't get the official version, i'll have this masterpiece displayed there somehow.

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

as of now, it's a 23.5 official trailer gifset of sun being jealous of ongsa with amazing 939 notes, but the gifset of lada protecting earn from hitting her head on the table is quickly catching up with 877.

9. how many mutuals do you have?

17 mutuals? i think that's right.

10. how many followers do you have?

843 if you count the main blog + side-blogs.

11. how many people do you follow?

... 27 blogs.

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

i mean, sure? i do get embarrassed by my own shitposts sometimes and i delete them tho.

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

all the time. it's my favorite social media for sure. i get to see pretty things and my dash is much better curated than other apps. it's great.

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

i don't think i ever fought online. i block people with remarkable expedience tbh if i don't like their vibe or their tone or the shit they post, and i also make use of the filtered tags, so you know, no reason to fight.

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts

these exist? good for them. you shouldn't tell people what to do.

16. do you like tag games?

sure! i only started being part of them now, so sometimes i forget them, or i just don't see i was tagged, but i do enjoy them.

17. do you like ask games?

i don't think i've ever done an ask game but that's mainly bc i think people won't want to know and won't send any asks, and i'd rather spare my ego from that humiliation.

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

i think many of my mutuals are famous in our ql bubble which makes it a little crazy that some are my mutuals tbh. that's most of them actually.

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

i do have people that make me kick my feet when they interact with my posts like, twirling my hair, silly smile, giggling because they've noticed me. but actually crushing, imagining our lives in the countryside, with a kitchen facing the meadow in a fine spring morning, with two dogs and three cats, no.

20. tags?

i'm tagging @namtanfilm, @aylinaliens, @sollucets and @sherrymagic, @ayansukkhaphisit and whoever feels like doing it, and to those i've tagged, just ignore this if you want, too, no pressure.

[matan4il]

Hi, I’ve seen some gifs of that Thai show, but are those two actors together in real life too?

Hi lovely Nonnie!

Oh wow, I did not expect an ask about Kinnporsche The Series / Mileapo, but I probably should have since I went off a bit in the tags of that gifset reblog, didn't I? XD Please never take me too seriously whenever I claim two specific individuals have invented love, I'm just joking around. Unless I'm talking about David and Jonathan, because they totally did. ;p

But if I'm to try and answer seriously, I would say that officially, the last time either Mile or Apo have addressed the issue of their romantic status, they both said they're single (Mile in Aug 2022, Apo in July 2021 if I'm not mistaken). Of course, that's also the response I would expect from them if they were together. Because just like there are opposite sex couples who meet on the sets of movies and TV shows, and fall in love or just have an affair, there are same sex couples who go through the same thing. The difference is that society (and the entertainment business even more so) is still so homophobic, that these same sex couples often can't come out. I mean, if opposite sex couples sometimes feel they need to keep it to themselves, and we only find out about their romances decades later, like in the case of Jane Seymour and Christopher Reeve (if we find out about them at all), then imagine how much harder it is for same sex couples who fall in love as co-stars... (or even when there's a same sex celebrity couple, period)

Other than Mile, Apo and the people they trust, no one really knows if Mileapo actually are a couple and have to be closeted, or if they're just truly the best of friends who bonded so much as co-stars on the set of KPTS that their behavior is hard to distinguish from the way lovers act towards each other. We also have to take into account that they're from Thailand, and the cultural norms for how men are allowed to interact can be very different. Especially when we remember that they starred in a BL (gay themed show) together, and the norm for that is heavy fan service. I AM convinced that even then, their bond runs deeper than fan service, especially since the original production of KPTS was canceled, and the production company that was set up instead explicitly said it would not require fan service. Plus, this company was co-founded by Mile to save KPTS and give Apo his second chance to shine as an actor, after he had been previously bullied by homophobes into leaving the acting world. So yeah, I have every reason to believe their connection is real.

And the fact that this is a part of their unhinged story (that they met briefly as models 7 years before they auditioned for KPTS, that they obviously thought the other one is an attractive man and remembered each other all of these years, that Mile watched Apo's shows, that they re-connected at the auditions and seem to have been inseparable since, for over 2.5 years now, that they fought together for KPTS to be made and then gave us on screen an astounding love story, that they chose to go on working together on their next projects, including the upcoming queer film Man Suang, and continue to hang out even outside of their busy schedule together) brings us to what is most meaningful to me about them. Whether their bond is romantic or platonic, it's clearly so deep that I wouldn't hesitate to call them soulmates. They love and care for each other, support one another, and I think they healed each other in ways that make me feel soft and happy to know that such love exists in the world. So I'm going to continue rooting for them, and possibly joke about it like I know that they're a couple, because in a very profound sense of the word, even if it's not romantic, they are.

This was probably way too long, my apologies. Okay, have a Mileapo being in sync gif just to make it a bit better...

Have a good day! As always, my ask tag. xoxox

[annemarieyeretzian]

I know better than to elbow into or engage in Discourse™ in the critical role fandom, which is easily the most toxic I’ve ever met. but I got time today and people are pissing me off on the internet with willful ignorance, so here we are.

the phrase “I know loneliness you don’t” appears on closed captioning,

in the official transcript,

and has made its way onto gifsets and other tumblr posts, but ashton/taliesin said “I know a loneliness,” not “I know loneliness;” they/he said it in the same breath, but if you listen closely, it’s there (and before anyone comes for me for hearing things that aren’t there or whatever, the transcript is consistently wrong – every single episode, there are significant mistakes).

ashton saying “I know a loneliness you don’t” to laudna – or to any other member of the party – is true. they know the loneliness of not knowing who they were or where they came from, something no one else in the party (except for fresh cut grass, which ashton themself acknowledges: “all except for one”) knows.

imogen remembers her childhood and her parents. laudna remembers her self-proclaimed happy childhood and her parents. orym remembers his childhood and his mother and his husband and his husband’s family. dorian remembers his childhood and his parents and his brother. fearne remembers her childhood and her nana and all her feywild friends and her parents. chetney has even lived long enough to forget much of what he once remembered. ashton doesn’t remember their childhood, and they didn’t remember anything about their parents until their friends fucked around and found out in their brain (also – brief flashes of painful trauma can hardly be considered true memory).

but it shouldn’t take semantics for anyone to understand that “I know loneliness and no one else does, including An Actual Widower, a werewolf in a pack of one (1), and the undead woman in front of me who I personally fought the spirit of delilah to bring back from memories of her own loneliness” is not what ashton meant. whether it was “a loneliness” or “loneliness,” the only thing ashton claimed to know that laudna didn’t was the specific loneliness of not remembering anything before the age of 11 or so.

I’ve also seen other members of the ashton greymoore defense squad defend what ashton meant while admitting ashton was “being an asshole” or was “out of line,” but I don’t think they were. and maybe that says more about my neurodivergent bitch ass than ashton, but again, I got time today and I don’t think we need to placate people who’ve already decided on their version of things. ashton wasn’t being an asshole and ashton wasn’t out of line. ashton was a little indelicate, or a little insensitive, maybe, but... how/why is that surprising? especially nearly 50 episodes into this campaign? if you’re surprised that ashton didn’t fully think about what they were saying while being blunt about their feelings, I don’t know what to tell you other than all 49 previous episodes are now available on youtube.

ashton wasn’t even fucking being inconsiderate! it’s like you all heard laudna react to what she thought ashton was implying �� she also missed the point of what ashton meant, which was made clear by her initial response – and lost your entire damn minds while rushing to defend her (as if that was even necessary). ashton went out of their way to be considerate right from the beginning of the conversation: “all of you have, with one exception, a place that you came from, people who made you who you are, all except for one.” “you know things, too. don’t think I don’t know that.”

ashton brought up their lived experience, but took care to a) acknowledge that they might not be the only person in the party with this specific experience and b) acknowledge that the others (specifically laudna) have lived experiences that they don’t. ashton is actively holding space for this specific loneliness to also be fresh cut grass’ experience and actively affirming that laudna’s lived experience(s) is/are her own trauma that they have not experienced.

shouting “HOW DARE ASHTON SAY THAT! HOW DARE ASHTON SUGGEST THAT LAUDNA’S NEVER BEEN LONELY!” is simply untrue. it’s also incredibly stupid. please don’t pick up the closest (and often worst) possible conclusion simply because it’s easiest to reach and lowest on the shelf.

ashton wasn’t selfish, and if you a) can’t practice critical thinking b) are unwilling to reflect on why you want to make ashton the villain and laudna the victim in a conversation where both parties were clearly comfortable with each other and c) truly think it’s selfish to be honest and open about specific pain with people you care about? have some animal crackers and apple juice and take a damn nap.

[japrilfools]

48 + Japril?

Thank you for the request! For the purposes of this AU, Jackson finds out that April is in the ER sooner than he did in the actual S14 episode. Also, I can’t remember who made the gifset with Japril + Running Up that Hill lyrics, but this was definitely inspired by that!!! So shout out to whoever made it and I’ll try to see if I can find it and rb it again!!!

Song: Running Up that Hill (A Deal with God) by Kate Bush

“And if I could, I’d make a deal with God, and I’d get him to swap our places”

His hands shake as he reaches for her, recoiling as soon as he feels her freezing skin. Panic settles in the pit of his stomach, and he barely hears all of the frantic voices around him. Jackson doesn’t want to let her go, but he also doesn’t know how much longer he can take watching them try to save a corpse.

That’s all she is, isn’t it?

Jackson had been in the pit when they’d brought her in, and somebody had pulled him away from her unmoving body, begging him to not watch. But he couldn’t look away. He couldn’t not be there as she fought for her life.

Even if there isn’t much left of it.

Being in this room isn’t going to do anything to save April, but they’d finally acquiesced when they realized that he refused to leave. He knows that the other doctors are arguing on whether or not to keep going, but he can barely focus on anything other than her pale, ashen face. April was strong. She was good. Something like this shouldn’t be happening to her. He’d do anything for it to be him on the table instead. For it to be him slowly slipping away from the earth. She could last without him, he was pretty sure, but he knows he could never last without April.

And just as he finds himself accepting that he will beg a God he doesn’t believe in, the monitor shows that she has a heartbeat.

Sobs leave him indiscriminately as they continue to work, but all he can think is that she’s alive.

She’s alive.

Send me a number 1-100 + a ship, and I’ll make a drabble corresponding to the number on my spotify wrapped

[vaicomcas]

There are gifsets about this. But sometimes words show things more clearly.

-----------------------

Bobby: About that. I liked the kid. We fought together. But there's only one way this ends. Castiel: Bobby's right. We have to find Jack and help him. Bobby: What? That kid -- he killed Mary! Castiel: I know that. Bobby: Ah-ah. Don't say "but. Castiel: But he -- Jack may not even realize what he did was wrong. Bobby: If his human side is gone, you know what's left -- Lucifer. Now, if you boys want to sit around and talk, fine. But me? I'm gonna get on the horn to some of my people and go find that boy. Castiel: And what then? Bobby: An unstoppable monster who don't know right from wrong gets put down -- or the closest we can get to it. And anybody who don't know that needs to go back to school.

It's not just Dean Winchester the big hero, some random hunter from another world that Jack (and Cas) helped rescue also gets to talk down to Cas and "school" him? About how he should be on board with murdering his son? Cas wasn't given the chance to say a word back to this?

Dean: He's locked up, safe. He's in the Ma'lak box. Castiel: No! Dean: And that's where he's gonna stay. Castiel: Even after hearing what I said, you want to keep Jack sealed in a living death? Dean: He agreed to it. Because deep down, I think he knows it's best. Castiel: No. You're doing what Dumah -- You are manipulating him. Sam: Cas. Castiel: What? You just want to forget about him? Dean: I wish I could forget about him! After what he did? And you know what he can do. This is our only play.

SAM: Okay, the last time we found Jack, it wa—it was by praying to him, but that's not gonna happen again. DEAN: Yeah, you think? CASTIEL: You should never have tried to lock him away. DEAN: You know what? You're right. I never wanted to put him in that damn box. I wanted him dead. DEAN: He's dangerous, Cas, and you knew it! You've known it for a long time! But that's okay. You know why? Because me and Sam, we've killed just about everything there is. And this -- Jack -- oh, we'll find a way. Because he's just another monster. CASTIEL: You don't mean that. DEAN: The hell I don't. (Dean and Cas stare each other down for a moment and then Cas storms out of the room) DEAN: All right. So, I guess we got to find Jack. SAM: Yeah. Then what? DEAN: I don't know. Maybe we call Rowena, see if she can put together one of those, um, "soul bombs." SAM: The...thing you were gonna use against the Darkness? DEAN: Yeah, might actually put a dent in the kid. SAM: (looking troubled) Okay. (quietly)

Dean and Sam were going to kill Jack with a soul bomb.

They threw out the red herring of Chuck to erase all this. But I am not fooled. After this, there is no way Cas doesn't take up arms to defend Jack. Against the apocalypse world hunters, against the Winchesters.

[follows-the-bees]

I'm celluloidbroomcloset's anon about SPN fandom. You're very lucky! In my corner of the fandom the fans don't even know Buckleming are two people, think Bobo (BOBO!) is pro-wincest, and are convinced "the writers" have been gaslighting us all along. To these fans there's no such thing as corporate interference, "the writers" hate us and call us crazy, queer coding is just another word for queerbait, and Destiel only exists because of Misha and the fandom. They're on every script release post and deleted scene gifset screaming how dare "the writers" cut this and how dare they call us crazy for seeing Destiel.* "The secret good SPN that lives in my head" is their favorite phrase and calling everything good "the writers" did just a happy accident is their favorite hobby. That bit I said about people saying the writers suck on the scripts they wrote is not hyperbole. I have seen it said, right after going on about how shippy the cut scenes are, far more often than should ever happen.

Maybe it's not fair to paint all of us transplanted SPN fans with the same brush, but I do know some of those same people I fought with over things like the Cas and Crowley "maybe he's your boyfriend" scene or the script-cut scene of Dean spreading Cas's ashes at the windmill are here as well. I am also a fandom old, been here since the beginning, and have been fighting against the nonexistent monolith of "the writers" since about season eight. "The Writers Suck" has been an SPN fandom mantra for a very long time and it does spread to other fandoms SPN fans who shout it have moved into.

You are, again, very lucky and I am glad you've gotten to see some of the best of the SPN fandom. I am not so lucky and have seen all of the worst and it is getting a foothold in OFMD. I don't want it to spread more than it already has.

*"The writers" calling us crazy is entirely made up, twisted from an incident when an executive for WB was bullied off twitter by Destiel fans because he didn't know Destiel was a thing. It led to a hard pushback on Destiel from corporate, which led to the infamous "three straight guys" press releases for season nine, and is the origin of Misha's "you're not crazy" tweet. It had nothing at all to do with "the writers" save for forcing them into even more heavy queer coding and dodging censorship.

Hello!

I will start by saying that I too have seen instances of people blaming the writers, but they have not been the most prominent. So, I know it is a thing. But for the most part, I have seen mainly CW and WB said as the queer censors.

I think our experiences are very different for two reasons: while I watched SPN pretty much from the beginning, I did not join the fandom until after the finale. And I joined SPN twt, which you have to heavily start muting or blocking people. I highly curated my tl, so most people who told me Cas' love confession was platonic or would tell me that I was wrong for saying the finale was bad were not present. Of course, I still get those people coming onto my posts, but not as much.

I joined Tumblr just over a year ago, and I have just started moving over my filmmaking metas.

And living in the trenches of it like you have as everything has been developing, and coming in after, being able to look at SPN as a whole can lead to very different outcomes and experiences.

I did not have to experience live the disagreements, but I have caught up on many of them as well as all the new stuff that has happened after the finale.

I am very confused about what side of the fandom you are on - at first I thought it sounded like the brothers first side, but then you talked about the "good spn that lives in my head" and I have seen that a lot with the Destiel side (to be fair, I have heavily blocked bronlys since I am a TFW fan). I'm not quite sure how someone can think Bobo is pro-wincest. He wrote the second divorce arc and Cas' love confession, tying phrases from as early as Cas' introduction into the speech. And for Dean's side, just like when Mary died the second time, he cries and goes mute (which is what he does when he is overwhelmed emotionally). Sam called him and he didn't pick up, crying on the floor. That shows how much he cares about Cas, he's in so much grief he cannot pick up the phone for Sam.

Ok, moving on. I guess my "side" of the fandom is analytical. I personally study the writers and the filmmaking (cinematography and camerawork) and how those aid in the character and plot development. I am also personally in the middle where I love all of TFW (honestly every character on the show) but also ship Destiel. I can tell you exactly which writers I like (Edlund, Thompson, Carver, Perez, and such) and which I don't (Buckleming - they will always have a weird sexual thing or take Dean back down to S1 basics in their episodes.)

One of my biggest pet peeves in fandom are people blaming writers for decisions that were made later on down the line. And I have pushed back on that numerous times. It makes me sad to know that this is still prevalent and that it is being spread to other fandoms. I can only hope that changes in the future.

I have seen a huge divide in the people I know who are both SPN and OFMD fans. And most of that revolves around Izzy's character. But that's another topic for another day.

I'm trying to remember if I have seen any "blaming" of the writers in the OFMD fandom. I have unfortunately seen some: mainly criticism of DJ and how the ending of S2 went down. I think most of that deals with how you felt about Izzy's death (I've seen several people say it is exactly like Dean's - I personally do not agree with that, yes it has echoes, but Izzy and Dean are entirely different characters and represent entirely different arcs and ethos in the show).

Also used to weaponize the OFMD ending is the "the ending will be satisfying." I could write a whole essay about this, but just like with SPN, a very divided fandom, I've come to see OFMD is also very divided, so no, the finale was not going to be satisfying to everyone. Especially because it is the end of an Act II of III, the famously darkest moment/plotpoint of a story. BUT there was no cliffhanger, there are threads to follow with everyone's story. There is hope and love and joy. And that is "satisfying."

I feel like this is a long response and I apologize if it turned into rambling. I guess that's what happens when you're a writer. Lol.

I completely agree with you. I am worried about blaming the writers gaining a foothold in another fandom. Especially on a show that at every turn has shown how much care they have put into the show. That allows a collaborative environment for the cast and crew. That makes sure not to punch down. And has not made fun of fans and their beliefs and readings of the show (yes, that is a dig at SPN and how they treated fans) but instead embraces them. Samba went to set on days he didn't have to just to take videos for us!! I hope the fandom can embrace the love and hope the show radiates instead of giving into poison.

[tarnussy]

Bit of a DIY year in review from your resident Stormveil dweller here. Soon-to-be Elden Lord for the first time.

No Steam review from me with that questionable toxic relationship line everyone is getting, but here is my year in review regardless. I am only posting this for myself mainly.

I have also shown these at some point this year (with less hours), so no changes in characters, just my self-insert Tarnished and Godrick. I nearly opened this game every day with a few exceptions since I first played it in February (honorable mention to being utterly smitten with it since release, even though I couldn't play it at the time for a whole year).

My main and first gameplay is the one with over 500 hours, and yes, I still have not finished my first playthrough. I am on Elden Beast though, and I know I want to gif parts of it because I'm doing a DIY Age of Grafting with everyone essentially being dead except Godrick (plus Rannald sitting underground forever, good for her).

I also don't know what outfit to wear for the final cutscene that would make sense for the ending I'm doing, I have a lot of contenders. Plus I am in no rush, I play this game to be immersed in it, to collect my little plants and to loot the same areas over and over while taking my little grafted silly guy with me - and Godrick's summon made this game 500x better, even though it was already my favourite before that.

I have multiple playthroughs because I like to be able to access every single area and boss in case I decide to make a gifset or post, without having to spend hours to fight my way across the map to a boss I wanna gif but already fought. Therefore, Rivers of Blood my beloved, it is a gifmaker's / virtual photographer's best friend if you want to clear out an area fast for footage. Makes me sad how I feel anxious even to include it in posts bc I know how hard people tend to go off on players who use it, even if you play offline.

Other favourites are: Meteoric Ore blade, Crystal sword, Lordsworn Straight sword, St. Trina's sword, Eleonora's poleblade. None of these were tainted by gamerbros (unlike RoB and Moonveil), I went in absolutely blind when it came to weapons and I used what I genuinely liked and like to this day. My fav kind of magic is gravity magic.

One thing I am sad about is the gameplay timer, and the fact that it stops at 999 hours played. That will probably be the only thing that will stop me from continuing my very first playthrough on my main character. I must track the playtime at all times. We'll see.

Oh I guess it won't hurt if I mention that ER is my first Souls game, and it was nowhere near as hard and scary as people tend to tell that to new players. It was fine, save for late game areas. But I guess it also helped that I came to open world fantasy games from survival horror games, so getting my ass kicked was just normal. Now of course I'm so used to the keyboard settings on this game that I can't even go back to other games like TW3 at the moment because my brain just can't comprehend it. I constantly want to double jump with the horse in other games.

Yeah I could go on for hours just talking about what comes to mind, but that is enough I believe. Favourite game. Thank you Godrick for terrorizing my Souls-virgin ass with your cutscene when I had no context or idea about anything at all. Seeing your cutscene and fight made me say it out loud that I'll never play this game and that I didn't see the appeal. Biggest clown shit I've ever said in my life, look at me now 🤡 I'm running out of face paint.

[thevikingwoman]

5 and 13?

Thank you, Fatale!

5. Which WIP is first on your list to complete this year? Will you post a snippet?

My first WIP I want to finish is a ffxiv Shadowbringers piece - I have the bones of it but it needs a heavy edit. I've already talked a little about it before - after Holminster Switch, Meryta freaks out a bit, and runs into the arms of Tansui. For no reason she can discern herself of course. It's a turning point, in that he offers comfort readily and it changes their relationship from something physical to something else. If they can manage to figure it out.

This is unedited, and I'm - still trying to figure out how to write Tansui's voice, but I'm excited for a little POV flip here

Meryta looks tired, and somehow smaller than he recalls, curled up like this on his bed. She’s a warrior, and he’s seen her fight – Garleans and their war machines, tearing them apart. He knows she’s fought other things, things he can barely comprehend. Right now, she just looks young and worn out. Feeding branches to his stove, he sets to work, rice and water and dried meat. He chops scallions and considers fetching eggs, but opts against it. She could wake any time. So, he goes on and chops and cooks and lets the smell fill the small room.

13. Aside from fanfic, are there any other fan works you’d like to try creating? Fanart, or fanvids, gifsets, or podfic?

I don't think so? I don't even know where I'd start with fanvids or gifs and it has no real interest. I wish I had time to learn to draw, but I doubt that's going to happen - if I were to pick up some art it would be more likely to be playing around with physical media stuff than trying to do fanart (aka people). The only thing I can see may happen is turn to gpose crimes, which I do think is a from of fanwork, but currently I have a couple of thinks holding me back.

Fanfic asks for the new year

[englishstrawbie]

Imprints was so good! I loved the story from start to finish. Seeing how you worked Dean and Pruitt and Ryan and Andrew in was amazing. I miss those characters.

There were two parts that fought for my favorite... 1) Finally seeing a story where people understand what Maya means to the team and especially where Maya gets to hear it. 2) Maya's refusal to leave Carina hurting in any world and knowing her so well that dream Carina can't help but let her in. Who am I kidding, its the second one. They love each other so much!

Your concept was great, your story telling even better. My heart squeezed in sadness and joy more than once.

Thank you so much! When I started plotting it out, it was very much about Maya and her family, and what their lives would look like if she'd never taken up running - with the message that her running had nothing to do with the way Lane behaved. But then I started thinking about what that would have meant for Maya as she got older and was choosing a career, and what it would mean if she never ended up at Station 19. It was a lot of fun to think about that and I have to credit this gifset by @lacallemojada for helping me with it!

I loved the idea that Maya and Carina are drawn to each other, no matter the circumstances, so writing those moments where Maya is desperate to help Carina, even though she knows she's not 'real', and Carina letting her help, despite her being a stranger, felt right to me.

Thank you for taking the time to send this message, I loved reading about your favourite moments and I'm so glad you enjoyed it! ❤️

[besidesitstoowarm]

"Doomsday" thoughts

i'm realizing i forgot to mention my WIFE freema agyeman in last episode. i'm so sorry baby. i can't wait for s3

anyway this episode fucks severely and kind of reminds me that a lot of diehard ten/rose shippers don't like. GET what makes them work, bc they don't get what makes rose work. i think i've said it before that not only do moffat haters not understand his era, but davies lovers often don't even really like it for the right reasons. or like, reasons that are based on the text instead of the tumblr interpretation of the text. this isn't to disparage davies likers or ten/rose shippers or whatever, just make sure you're remembering the episodes as they happened and not as 1080p gifsets you reblogged 8y ago

anyway! this was a great finale to s2 and to the rose era in general (i'll make a season retrospective w more detail). it's just some goddamn great doctor who, davies is masterful at weaving deep and impactful character work into the classic balls-to-the-wall insane doctor who shenanigans. let's explore, shall we

i love the idea behind the "genesis ark" like tell me that doesn't sound like something that already exists in dw canon. calling back to needing rose's touch bc humanity– the human ability/desire/habit of crossing boundaries, inherently filling every space, colonizing to be less generous– has a power to it. the bit as well about "cybermen will remove sex and class and race and creed" is a critique of centrism bc our differences make us human! they're beautiful! the great equalizer is horrific, imposed violence

i'm sorry if this seems homophobic but i don't think a straight person could have possibly written the dalek-cybermen interactions in this episode. "the daleks have no concept of elegance" "this is obvious" sorry it's just pure cuntiness on a level i have never seen a cishet achieve. i'm not stereotyping davies as just "sassy" or whatever he's deeply talented in all facets but bitchiness is indeed one of those facets

continuing the anti-establishment theme, yvonne walking into the cybermen hell saying "oh god, i did my duty" is deeply telling. the cyberman she becomes crying an oil-slick tear and fighting back saying "i did it for queen and country" is kind of sad and kind of horrifying. it's about the layers

rose gets to flex w the daleks by telling them what she did as bad wolf. "i met the emperor....and turned him into dust" yes!! yes!! get their asses baby!! "both sides had secrets" all the time war seeding is so tasteful and delicious. it works as both bread-crumbing info that will be revealed eventually and as background worldbuilding should they decide to never get into the nitty-gritty. they obviously do in "the end of time" for one and then eventually the 50th but davies plays it just subtle enough that if they never did get deeper into it, i don't think it would have felt like a cocktease

i love the pete-jackie stuff sorry. i love stories about people finding/refinding/etc love in their 40s. they're not the version of each other that they each know but they're close enough and they do love each other. their big hug made me emotional

and of course. the ending. what is there to say about the ending that hasn't been said a hundred million times already. murray gold is a fantastic composer and he CRUSHES it. the fact that ten was ready to sacrifice rose without her consent (which he will later do to donna! themes!), the fact that she fought the narrative and refused until tragedy took over, as it inevitably must. bad wolf bay. "i love you" "rose tyler, –" as tears drip down his face. oh i am just so sick. they were codependent and unhealthy but you really can't deny how much they cared for each other, and even tho i KNOW they meet up again and get their "happy" endings i just. oh it hit. phenomenal acting on both parts, incredible score, oh it just destroys me. a beautiful end for the season and for rose

side note, i did not recall that "runaway bride" was the next story. i totally forgot that we get the season-long gap before seeing donna again. i can't wait to get back to donna, she brings out the best in ten (being divorced and a pathetic wet beast)

season retrospective up soon!