#this game is doing cocomelon shit to me

[birdpaladin]

god isnt watching

[omorinintendoswitchedition]

okay time to go to work (play papas bakeria for two hours)

[dellamortethelesser]

I didn’t like inquisition but one thing I will say is that I’ve brought latent dread from that game with me. Every single time I activate a Fen’Harel altar or an Evanuris altar I keep thinking, “what fucked up consequences is this going to have?” because all I’m remembering is how anxious we all were about those fade orbs that Solas was making us activate during inquisition. I can’t believe he was telling the truth about those. They were , in fact , fade stabilizers. I’m still convinced he’s doing some cocomelon shit to me.

[lesbiansurge]

yeah man i dont even like brawl stars anymore *continues to talk about brawl stars*

[astro-b-o-y-d]

I am apparently not immune to funny water pour mobile game

[sleepknoot]

Man. . .House Flipper kinda dangerous.

[coldbrewpup]

i'm so balatro pilled now

[mouthwashingconfessionsblog]

I absolutely HATE aus where they completely erase jimmy out of existence. yes, he's an asshole. we all hate him. but he's such a crucial character, for gods sake we play 90% of the game through his eyes

i also hate curly dickriders like holy shit. he's not a good person. he didn't do anything about anya & jimmy. he's the most perfectly morally gray character and all the fandom can do is water him down into this hot heartthrob, and, even worse, literally ship him with anya??? and if not, a dumb fucking animal in his post-crash version? holy shit, have you lost your morality? that's a human fucking being and you're watering him down to a pet just because he's completely disabled. no the hell he wouldn't watch cocomelon. no the hell would he use literal dog talking buttons to communicate??

daisuke is not a teenager, oh my god are you guys stupid?? just because he's this enthusiastic, outgoing and generally happy character doesn't mean he's young young. i mean yes, he is the youngest, but by youngest he's literally 20+. you can't apply for an internship if you're 19 and below. plus, he literally goes clubbing way before he signed up for pony express.

for anya, i literally cannot stress this enough — she. is not. a shy. character. we play the game through her assaulter's eyes for crying out loud, of course his pov of anya would be significantly different. no the fuck she wouldn't fall for curly. you never know, she might actually be very outgoing and extroverted, she just cant express that side of herself because of jimmy. you never. fucking. know.

i have something to say about swansea too. people tend to water him all down, too. he's not grumpy all the damn time, he's literally just any other old man near retirement. also, he would not, in any fucking way, infantilize daisuke or anya. or any of the crew.

all of the crew members are full, grown adults, for fuck's sake.

anyway that drained me goodnight chat stay skibidi

.

[thenamesapollo]

IT'S ME BOY I'M THE PS5, SPEAKING TO YOU FROM INSIDE YOUR BRAIN. LEAVE THE GIRL, WE DON'T NEED HER. COME WITH ME, PLAY MY GAMES! WE'LL HAVE COWBOY TIMES IN SPACE...!!!! DOO DOO DOO DOO!! I OWN YOU BOY YOUR FREE WILL IS AN ILLUSION!!!!

u are doing some cocomelon shit to me

[genericpuff]

I've come to the stunning realization-

-that Lore Olympus is basically to the webtoons industry what Youtube Kids is to Youtube.

And I'm not talking about the general "Youtube Kids" label, I'm talking about those videos - Elsagate, Johny Johny, Cocomelon, Mickey Mouse tattooing Spongebob or whatever other weird example you can think of - which are explicitly designed to game the algorithm, turn views into money, and most of all, gain and keep the attention of the one demographic that won't question what they're consuming - children.

!!!!THIS POST HAS FAST PASS SPOILERS AHEAD!!!!

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I mean, this is undoubtedly just a tinfoil hat theory, but think about it:

Bright oversaturated colors that are attention-grabbing.

Meme faces and 'lol rAnDoM' humor even when it doesn't suit the situation at all.

Art that's all around ugly and cheap on a technical level but still stands out due to its color design and prioritized advertising.

Vapid surface level scene-to-scene writing that doesn't connect or have any meaning in any coherent way.

One-dimensional projection characters who are easy to manipulate and sway for audience sympathy or anger even if those opinions change on a dime based on actions in the moment.

Cliffhangers that are less like true cliffhangers and more like clickbait. Episodes nowadays tend to be filled with drawn out plotlines, vague hints that can be applied to just about any school of thought, and non-sequitur memes to fill the time until they can hook the reader with another cliffhanger to keep them coming back next week.

Coin prices have gone up but episode length, substance, and quality have noticeably gone down. Even if they reach the same panel count they usually have, dialogue is minimal and pacing is brutally inconsistent to the point that plot progression is often non-existent.

Banner ads that run constantly, often in the first or second (or both) slots, with push notifications and pop-up ads also becoming more frequent whether you're subscribed to the comic or not.

And underneath ALL of that, we've got blatant objectifying and sexualization of female characters regardless of context, misogyny that claims to be progressive, racist undertones, borderline fetish content that constantly toes the Terms of Services line, normalization of problematic/toxic relationship dynamics, a creator who's more interested in 'getting back' at critics than writing an actual story, and underlying messaging both from the characters' and the creator's behavior that encourage witch-hunting, rejection of accountability, and blind devotion.

All this is essentially why I've given up consuming LO entirely, beyond just on a critical level as of late. There was a time long ago when I stuck around in the hopes it was going to get better, that maybe it was just going through a "rough patch" as some stories do. After that I stuck around because I wanted to see how it could possibly pull off its ending. And then after that, I simply stuck around for the laughs and community banter. But now I don't even find it funny anymore, the punchline of how bad it is has gotten incredibly old. And at this rate, as much as we'd like to believe it's going to end in its third season as it's been mentioned in the past, we also were told it was going to end between 100-200 episodes prior to that - the way it's going, I can't even stick around "for the ending" because LO is going to be around for as long as WT tries to milk it, despite it no longer having a heartbeat.

As much as I've loved talking shit about this comic and it's undoubtedly the main reason so many of you followed me here in the first place, I'm not going to lock myself in some kind of purgatory hell just to be proven what I already know is going to happen - either the comic continues on forever, doomed to be a lifeless mascot for the zombie corporation that is WT, or RS eats shit while trying to stick the landing with a plane that has no functional parts.

There's a quote from Caddicarus that I couldn't help but think of as I typed this up, from his nearly-decade-old review of Dalmations 3 (oh god, it's nearly been a decade since that video came out what the actual fuck-)

"And this is where I officially lost all fucking care. I realized it wasn't going to end anytime soon. It's one of those rare instances where the novelty of how awful everything is actually gets really tiresome and unfunny." - Caddicarus

[yb-cringe]

I’m just gonna

Pangi rambling to himself while doing stuff in lifesteal, asking a question and waiting for an answer. Waiting, pausing, turning and looking around at the empty surroundings and realizing how lonely it feels.

No one on lifesteal interacts with him much outside of those games he hosts, and having Pili on realms made him realize how painfully lonely he is.

He had to call Pili and talk to him for hours before he was able to fall asleep. Listening to Pili’s voice and letting it soothe him.

u guys r straight up doing some cocomelon shit to me

[r0zeclawz]

this is really nitpicky but huge pet peeve of mine is roguelike type games where youre killing things and then you level up or whatever and the whole game automatically pauses and makes you pick one of like three upgrades it annoys me so much like jesus bro chill out im trynna play my game youre doing some cocomelon shit to me brother!!!

[jewfrogs]

4, 8, and 9 for the ask game?

4. if you DNF any books, what was the pettiest reason you put a book down this year?

i dont really write down when i dnf books but i know i stopped reading some because i didnt care for the formatting. like if the font or the margins are egregiously small or the kerning is bad i am not reading your book do better!!

8. if someone were to ask you what your top ten books for this year were, which would you choose?

i fear i may make a post about this in the coming days so i dont want to say too much. i will simply say my top 1 book was the archive of alternate endings by lindsay drager. pure cocomelon shit to me

9. what book(s) had the biggest influence over your life this year?

toni morrisons whole oeuvre. i chew through most books very fast but her writing is just so wonderfully rich and dense that i actually had to take my time and read her novels slowly over a few days to a week so the whole summer to me was the summer of ms morrison

[bottomschlatt]

house md is doing some cocomelon shit to me why does the intro to s3 ep14 read IDENTICALLY to a dark pictures anthology game. somehow even down to the rendering of the people it’s THE SAME

[euclydya]

📌 how did you find your hyperfixation? -Pokemon

✨ what draws you towards your hyperfixation? what is interesting about it? -mouthwashing

💎 are there any fun facts or trivia that you would like to share? -mouthwashing

🎥 do you have any favorite scenes from your hyperfixation? -gravity falls

🏳‍🌈 do you have any headcanons (lgbt, race, neuro, etc) that are important to you? -Pokemon

💢 what do you NOT like about your hyperfixation? is there something you would want to change about it? -gravity falls

-🐀🌊

we got into Pokemon to impress a boy. it changed our life for the better i shit you not. we did not really impress said boy (we had the biggest crush on him as a lil kid I'm talkin like 3 years of age and he did Not like us like that) but getting into Pokemon was one of the best things we ever did i think. we would Not be who we are without Pokemon in our life JDJDJDJFFJ and we gOT INTO IT SOLELY TO IMPRESS SOMEONE!!! FJDJDJDJDJDJDDJDJF

So what initially drew us towards Mouthwashing was Curly. Like... We saw his face post crash and it scared the shit out of us because it touched on a huge trigger of ours and we were like WHAT IS THAT WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK AAAAAAAA!! AAAAAA!!!!!! and we saw this game was suddenly EVERYWHEREEEEE but people were saying it's REALLY FUCKING GOOD so we were like. Well shit gotta sit down n see what all the fuss is about huh. Fuck. And let me tell you getting into this game has helped with getting over said trigger a bit!!!! As for what's interesting about it I'd have to say just. Everything??? The whole... Watching everything fall apart tbh. Seeing things through the eyes of an absolutely horrid person like Jimmy also. It's just. it's very Advanced Cocomelon. But *shakes Jimmy like a fucking maraca* THIS FUCKING GUY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WANNA STUDY HIM UNDER A MICROSCOPE!!!!!!!!!!!! HE'S SUCH A NEAT VILLAIN TO US??????? he has So Many Issues. I'm just fucking Intrigued. ajakdjfjfjsjdjffjdjfj

DID YOU KNOW EVERYONE HAS A CANONICAL FAVOURITE POKEMON?????? curly's is pikachu, jimmy's is mega rayquaza, anya's is glaceon, swansea's is herdier, and. daisuke's is fucking weregarurumon??????? HELP????!! THAT'S SO FUNNY HI

we honestly don't remember many scenes from the show shdhdjsjdjfjdd bbut the scene where Mabel hesitates on shutting down the portal and trusts stan and Doesn't.... Good lird. v impactful

NONE THAT COME TO MIND TBH!!! we do like the hc that Ash is aro/ace though!

also nothing that comes to mind!!!

-Bill

[darklight-owl]

Game doing some cocomelon shit to me HUH?