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purple-writer8 · 8 months ago

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I Know Places - ACOTAR

Rhysand x Vanserra!Reader

“They are the hunters, we are the foxes. And we run.”

warnings: abused eris, autumn court shenanigans, mentioned abuse (verbal and physical), talks of violence, forbidden love, beron being beron, beron being abusive, physical abuse, angst, sexism, the autumn court brothers, angst, beron slander (as he deserves)

1.1k words

Part Two to But Daddy I Love Him

Masterlist :)

Your father had struck you across your face. He killed you. Killed you and killed your happiness. You thought he would understand, that he would let you marry Rhysand and you would be happy. What a fool you were to think Beron would ever allow you free will. “I’m sorry, darling,” your mother had been comforting you for hours now.

Your head rested on her lap as she weaved her fingers through your dirty blonde hair. “How can he be like this? Why doesn’t he want me to be happy?” You cried softly, your hands gripping your mother’s skirts with a white-knuckle grip.

“He… well, he loves you… he means well…” she trembled as she spoke, and you knew that she did not mean that. “How can you say that, mother? Means well? He struck me three times…” you sobbed unto her lap, your heart aching for one person— your lover.

“Darling, I know he is… unorthodox in his ways, but he cares about your future.” You sat up from your stance when she spoke those words, rage flaring inside your body at her claims. "Cares about my future?! How can you say that after what he did?" You spat angrily, your hands burning with your fire that was just begging to be let out.

"Rhysand is a bad man... his court... it's a nightmare. There are no morals there. He is a cruel, wicked man, just like his father," your mother contested. You could tell that she was distressed, just like you could tell how abused she was by your father, how she feared him even when he was not around.

"Do you think I am daft, mother?" You asked quietly.

"No, honey. You are just youn-" You cut her off.

"Do you think I don't know, mother? You think I haven't seen how beaten he leaves Eris after he makes a small mistake? You think I haven't seen how he eggs Fenix on to compete with Eris constantly? How he beats each of my brothers into oblivion? You think I don't know what happened to Jesminda and Lucien?" You were erratic, trying to get her to understand that you were no longer a child.

Your eyes drifted to her arms, covered by her long sleeved dress, "you think I don't know what he does to you?"

The Lady of Autumn stilled, her face falling as she stared at you solemnly. "I have tried to protect you... Eris has tried. Even Beron has tried. Our reality is not perfect, but your father loves you, and he wants to protect you."

"I don't need protection, mother. I am not a child anymore... I am a female grown... and I want Rhys, and he wants me." You stated in an unwavering manner.

"You must understand that Rhysand is not a good man, honey. The Night Court is the worst place to be, the fae there are deranged and depraved," your mother countered.

You knew there was darkness in the Night Court, but you also knew there was light. So much light. You saw it, Rhys had shown you. But you could never say that, you had promised to keep Velaris a secret, and you would. "There must be good there, mother. I know there must," you stated softly.

When she did not answer, you said, "he loves me and he would never hurt me. I deserve him, and he deserves me. I wish to be happy."

She blinked and wiped her hands on her skirts, shaking her head, "your father has made up his mind, it is time you come to terms with that. We are Vanserras, it is the hand we were dealt." With that, the Lady of Autumn left your chambers, sending you further into despair. So, just because you were a Vanserra you had to deal with abuse and unhappiness?

You would let your family say what they wanted, but you wouldn't hear it. Loose lips sunk ships all the time, but not this time. Left to your own devices, you decided you wouldn't put up with your father's abuse. You rushed to your vanity and rummaged through the cabinet that held all of your trinkets until you found it.

A mirror. A beautiful sapphire encrusted mirror given to you by Rhys a few months back. You reached for your red tube of lipstick and wrote on the glass, Come and get me. It was an enchanted mirror, made for the two of you to communicate through it, since he could not reach you in Autumn. You set the mirror down and waited, hoping that your lover hadn't shoved his own mirror in a drawer and forgotten about it.

You spent the day pacing back and forth in your chambers, hands trembling as you constantly checked the mirror for a reply back. Rhys, please, you pleaded in your mind.

"I love it when you beg," you let out a happy shriek when your lover appeared in the middle of your room, having winnowed in suddenly. You jumped into Rhys's arms, snaking your own over his neck and pulling him in. His arms slithered around your waist, holding you steady as you held on to him for dear life.

"Thank the Cauldron," you cried happy tears, ready for him to take you away from this cage. Rhys pulled away and inspected your figure, his violet eyes turning dark, his thumb grazing over the bruising on your cheek as he growled, "Beron."

A tear slipped down your cheek, a tear he collected with his thumb, "you won't ever suffer under your father again."

"I just want to go with you," you sniffed, leaning your head against his hand as he cupped your cheek. The door to your chambers opened swiftly, "sister, I've brought you suppe-"

Eris dropped the plate when he saw the High Lord of Night holding you close, his expression turning into steel. You yelped and clung to Rhys for dear life as your older brother sent fire bolts his way-- bolts that bounced off the shield Rhysand had put up around the two of you. "It doesn't have to be like this," Rhysand told your brother in a sing-song voice.

"Let her go! This is a breach! This means war, Rhysand." Eris growled and you could only shake your head. "I'm sorry," was what you said before Rhys winnowed the two of you away.

As you were winnowed into a manor-- in the Night Court, you assumed-- you fell to your knees, loud sobs leaving your body. Rhys was quick to kneel with you, taking your trembling hands in his. "This is what you want?" He asked in a soft tone.

You nodded, "for me it's always you. It's only you, but... I'll miss Eris."

"I know, lovely. But this is the only way."

"I know." You said, standing up with his help.

A feline smile spread on his face as he motioned to the starry and gorgeous view outside the balcony he had winnowed into, "Welcome to the Night Court."

Author’s note:

Part three of her meeting th IC and fluff? ALSO THANK YOU SM FOR THE COMMENTS ON PART ONEEEEE i am bursting with love

General Taglist: @mybestfriendmademe @lilah-asteria @sheblogs @x-reader-x @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @circe143

Series Taglist: @minaethrym @cherry-cin @acourtofimagines @slytherintaco @mp-littlebit @misskennygirl @umgatochamadopercyval @nayaniasworld @tenaciousperfectionunknown

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eve-was-framed · 1 year ago

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okay this is gonna be a bit of a long rant (with some SA and CSA mentions so pls don’t read if that will be too much for you rn) but I’ve been thinking a lot about the “male loneliness epidemic” lately and I have some Thoughts ™

we live in very isolating, depressing and scary times. we live in a hyper-individualistic capitalist hellscape that seems to punish people who need community support. and I truly believe that we as humans should try to help each other out in the ways that we are able to.

but I lose 100% of my empathy for lonely depressed men when they start using their own personal issues as an excuse to peddle ideologies that advocate for rape, pedophilia, child marriage, sexual slavery, and even murder of women and girls. I don’t fucking care how sad you are, if you advocate for other humans beings to be subjected to the cruelest treatment possible then you either need to get serious help or die (and not take anyone with you when you do).

you do not have a fucking paramount on suffering. you are not the only ones who experience loneliness. I know you think women get to just pick and choose whichever romantic partner/friends we want, but that is false, and also being seen as nothing but a sex object by men is so incredibly isolating too. that’s not real love and connection, that’s only being valued for what we can provide for men. so many people feel so alone and it genuinely is a big problem.

I was raised in an extremely misogynistic cult that preaches that grown men are not responsible for anything they do to little girls bc “they’re wired that way.” I had very bad things happen to me before I was even old enough to realize what it meant. and you know what the excuse always is? “well it happened to him when he was younger too so he can’t help that he does it to you.” I learned very early that male suffering is viewed as more important than the suffering they inflict on innocent people. and despite going through this, despite seeing nearly every woman in my life go through something similar, despite all of this, I still would never ever sympathize with any ideology that preaches rape, slavery, sex trafficking, pedophilia, white supremacy, etc. and that doesn’t make me some super hero, it makes me a mildly normal person.

so no, nobody “pushed” you into your evil ideologies, nobody made you do that. if true suffering at the hands of the opposite sex is really the root cause of inceldom then almost every single woman I know would be the most insane incel you’d ever meet in your entire life. but they’re not, even though many of them are lonely and long for true companionship, none of them feel so angry and entitled to it that they want to murder and rape men or little boys. not a single one. the root cause of inceldom is, and always has been, male entitlement. men who were raised to believe the world and every woman in it exists to serve them in some way, but then grew up and realized that actually nobody is owed sex and you don’t get to force women to marry you and have kids, because we are human beings who deserve to be happy too. and this makes them so mad that they start thinking it’s okay to do whatever they want to whoever they want, because after all, nobody on planet earth could ever suffer as much as incels do when a woman tells them no.

I’m fucking sick of it. stop saying “they pushed me to this” and start taking even an ounce of accountability for your deranged, entitled mindset.

#radblr #radical feminism #radical feminists please touch #radical feminist community #I cooked here tbh #male entitlement #male violence #tw csa mention

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vanpalmerenthusiast · 1 day ago

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Hii! I came by to meet one of my oomf’s <3 (sorry for such a surprising visit, though lol). I got curious about your liking for Van, and wanted to ask for your thoughts about both her counterparts - teen and adult. Have a great day!

ahh hi!! thank you so much for the ask, i love answering these!!

van is such a complex and beautifully written character, and i think we as a fandom don’t dive into that enough. i could go on and on about the symbolism within her character and all that, but focusing mainly on her teen self and adult self-

one of the things i love about teen van is that we can see her change so seamlessly from someone who is constantly joking and smiling to someone who is, well, carrying a teenage boy’s frozen body back from a hunt looking completely dead behind the eyes. she has looked death in the face multiple times and each time she does, a piece of her breaks off and falls away. she continues to survive all these situations that realistically should have killed her, and every time she rises from the ashes as someone new. (the phoenix symbolism drives me actually insane, i need to make an entire post solely about that.) i also very much love that she is the exact opposite of the “bury your gays” trope, proof butches live forever.

liv hewson’s portrayal of teen van is fucking flawless, from van’s class clown energy in the pilot to the deranged girlacolyte of the year that we see in the last episode of season two. i could never imagine anyone else playing van the way that they do- they deserve all the awards and i love them so much.

with all that being said, adult van is a completely different person than the girl we meet in the pilot, and she knows that. she immerses herself in the past- she runs a 80s-90s-esque video store, for god’s sake- but it doesn’t change the fact that all those run-ins with death and the mind-numbing trauma she experienced transformed her.

adult van’s storyline is crazy to think about, honestly- you’re telling me she survived three fires and lived through 19 months in the wilderness but she’s going to lose her life because of something manifested inside her by her own trauma?? i know it’s a long shot, but if she doesn’t get cured i’m suing.

and i just love how lauren ambrose plays van. my all-time favorite scene of adult van is that moment where she sees adult lottie again for the first time and you can see EVERYTHING happening inside her head. lauren did an outstanding job with that and i think about it so often. on that note, im also obsessed with the whole van and lottie relationship, let me know if i should post about that too x

okay this was super long but i hope you got something out of it 💋💋 will be posting more van content soon

#van palmer #liv hewson #lauren ambrose #yellowjackets #im sick over this character #i love you vanessa palmer

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ryuichirou · 6 months ago

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A couple of short ones and one longer one as a follow-up to the Twst and its age rating topic.

Anonymous asked:

Hello!! Would you ever consider doing an art of Riddle being pegged? Not by anyone in particular, just some anonymous person. Your art would make him so much justice, you're the only one that understand THE VISION!!!!

Anon, thank you so much! I really appreciate your high praise, especially as someone who doesn’t draw Riddle as often as he deserves to be drawn 👏

I wouldn’t be opposed to that, Riddle would look great being pegged. But pegging isn’t necessarily the type of kink that I go for in my head. So I guess only if it’s a commission…

Anonymous asked:

So there’s this game called Nameless: The One You Must Recall. Anyway, there’s a character called Tei who at first seems like he’s the team mom buuuut….well let’s just say nothing could be further from the truth. Anyway, he kind of reminds me of Trey. Even the name is eerily similar.

… based on the way you’re describing him, he certainly reminds you of Trey because of his name! 😎

I bet Trey would awkwardly giggle and say that at least he is different from him in every way other than their names sounding similar. Oh buddy…

Anonymous asked:

What's the argument for why twst's age rating should be put higher? I've been playing under the assumption that it's an all-ages game, and I never got to any point where I thought "a kid shouldn't see this" (although I am very open-minded when it comes to what I think kids can handle) so I've been wondering what specifically has people thinking it's a more mature game?

The biggest argument is that I am a bitter old gatekeeper with a stick that doesn’t want kids on their lawn (this isn’t their lawn, it’s a park, but the old gatekeeper doesn’t care).

Jokes aside, I think it’s a bit of a complicated topic, but I will try to explain my thoughts.

The game age rating is sometimes being used as an argument against adult fans enjoying the game or creating explicit content with its characters. I’ll dive into this later, but please keep this in mind while reading my entire reply because otherwise it does sound kind of deranged without this context lol To be honest, if not for that type of situations, I wouldn’t even be talking about this at all or being so gatekeeping. It would’ve help to filter out some annoying fans simply because those complaining are usually too immature both for understanding the media in question, ironically, and interacting with the fanbase in a proper way.

It is tricky because every age rating system is slightly different, and I’m guessing Twst uses Mobile software content rating system, so 4+/9+/12+/17+ for AppStore and 3+/7+/12+/16+/18+ for Google (apparently they use International Age Rating thing)… and in my quick 2 min search I couldn’t find any strict parameters that indicate the game belonging into a certain category according to these rating systems so I gave up, but. The point I am making is that yes, technically, Twst doesn’t have any nudity, any blood, profanity, substances and sexual content. But some of the themes brought up in the game + the way they are expressed don’t feel like 3-4+ content to me. I feel like even 13+ would’ve been more fair, not because a toddler couldn’t handle it, but because it doesn’t feel like it’s entirely suitable for them and they would have an ability to grasp what’s going on and have enough emotional maturity to understand some of the darker themes of the game. Why would 9+ or 12+ even exist if it was just a matter of “well there isn’t anything horny in it” (not saying that this is your point by the way! Your question is absolutely valid.)

I don’t think a kid wouldn’t be able to handle twst, in fact, I think kids are able to handle a lot of things they aren’t supposed to watch or play at their age. Just the other day I wanted to scold my younger sibling for playing a game with very dark themes, but then I remembered what I watched when I was their age. It depends on a person, so in terms of protecting kids, the age rating really doesn’t do anything: if they really wanted, they would have played it even if it was R18.

That being said.

People don’t always keep in mind that age rating and target audience are two completely different things. Yes, twst is 3+/4+, but its target audience are older teenagers and young adults (mostly in their 20s) – this is the majority of people who are invested in the game. And thus people who want to shun away those who are on the older side of the fandom OR like to explore darker sides of the canon (and it has PLENTY of dark elements) start using this as an argument: this is a kids game, this isn’t for you, this is Disney and it’s made for kids, as if it’s a My Little Pony fandom situation. Not only it’s stupid and gatekeepy, but it also kind of… infantilises the game that is actually quite mature in its writing, even if it avoids some explicitly adult topics? I hope that makes sense.

I feel like I just used your ask to rant about something that’s been bothering me, I hope it’s okay Anon lol

But yeah, a TL;DR answer to your question would probably be even though there isn’t anything too shocking or explicit, I think the themes of the game are more suitable for teens than for pre-schoolers. Even W.I.T.C.H. was 11+ when I was reading it back in the day (shrug)

#replies

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bohemian-nights · 1 year ago

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I’m not upset about the teaser fr I had a feeling it was just gonna lack anything I wanted to see, lots of characters weren’t in the Teaser like Rhaena, Jace, Creagan and Alys. So for the trailer I’m PRAYING we see nettles because the dragon seeds are a BIG part of the story and if they only have half of the cast it makes zero sense to the plot

I love your optimism anon, but right now I’m pissed off because of the treatment so far with her character.

For me, she should’ve taken Addams place in that teaser(the fact that people thought that he was Nettles shows how that wasn’t right).

Sorry not sorry, but Netty deserves that kind of treatment.

She is the one who claimed a wild dragon who killed the most dragonseeds. She’s the one who came from nothing. She’s the one who stands out from the bunch(the only in-canon Black character, the only non-Valyrian dragonrider, and still the only female dragonseed).

She’s the one who was at Maidenpool.

The one who of all people Daemon Targaryen would die for. She survives the Dance. She becomes a fire witch. She is remembered by a group of people even in the main series. She has broader implications to the main series(you might not need to be Valyrian to claim a dragon).

She’s the one with a legacy. She’s the one who has been featured in every single version of this story even when people like Addam are barely mentioned(or not at all).

Addam doesn’t even have an official rendering/artwork unless you want to count this:

Meanwhile:

Is she a secondary character? Yes, but despite what the haters try to say, Nettles is the least irrelevant secondary character in the Dance.

Again who did GRRM want to write a novella on🙃

She isn't just a plot device. She isn't there just to ruin a ship. She has a purpose. She stands on her own.

So really if she’s cut, replaced, reduced, whatever with a race-bent Black man whose main purpose is to sacrifice himself for some crazed white woman🙃

How anyone can not see the blatant racism in this show is beyond me🤦🏽‍♀️

I don’t like what is being done, but of course, I will start cackling if she’s in the official trailer with how the deranged racists are getting giddy over her being potentially cut from this season.

They could just be saving the best as a surprise🤷🏽‍♀️

Regardless, as much as I am pissed off right now, I’m about 98% she hasn’t been cut from the show. Sheepstealer is still being shown and Addam is for sure claiming Seasmoke(which is the elephant in the room some of you morons are avoiding).

Anyway cutting a character like her would be an idiotic move(even the TV journalists agree with that). I doubt that even this show would be idiotic enough to do that.

#bnasks #bnask #nettles #anti hotd #anti hotd fandom

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sealhaus · 1 year ago

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If nobody’s asked then I guess I should just speak:

My thoughts on kfp 4 so far as someone who’s been so invested in this franchise most of my life to the point where I took 2 autism assessments about it.

Mostly euphoric tbh, mostly because now the weight waiting for it held on my anxiety and heartburn ridden chest is gone. My socks were knocked off but i didn’t have to be hospitalized.

For most of my time in this fandom (or pandom if ur even more insufferable then usual) I’ve been under the assumption that dreamworks doesn’t really care about this franchise while at the same time knowing in my bones they’d make more. For most of that time I was pretty set on just having my own fun with it and that’s still my plan.

I’ve been so detached from the cannon for so long that I’ve entirely accepted that this movie could be garbage, I’ve already coped with that like 3 years ago. So I’ve had a relatively chill reaction.

So far it’s like exactly what I expected from the plot summary for better and for worse.

• I dislike Zhen so far but we’ll see what the writing has in store for her, she could be partially redeemed. Her design is overall lackluster and could really use something to make it more interesting. Her personality reminds me of the betta version of Kyoko before I had her loose her fuckin marbles. I don’t like her much but I also don’t seriously want to rip her apart with my teeth quite yet.

• I’ve never liked the five much, except for tigress, but it’s also kinda weird that they aren’t there. But the reasoning being that they basically ditched Po is hilarious to me. It’s a total copout but. Good for them honestly.

• I LOVE THE CHAMELEON!!!!! SHE LOOKS LIKE A BRONZE VASE AND YZMA HAD A TERRIBLE LITTLE CRACK BABY AND ITS WONDERFUL!!!! Getting ready to defend her with my life, heaven forbid women have hobbies.

• also my husband is coming home from rotting in Gongmen harbor so that’s fucking lovely. I went to bed and cried while hugging my Shen plushie because I’m absolutely deranged so that’s exactly the reaction I wanted.

• overall I don’t really care what happens to Po because I genuinely want to hit him with a car./hj But it seems a little early for this unless we’ve got a big time skip which it seems like is the case, but I still don’t think it’s enough of a timeskip.

• I hope the five get new outfits when they show up for 5 minutes. I just like clothes…

• I hope Shifu says sorry for accidentally ruining his son’s life. I don’t care too much about Tai Lung redemption, but I think he deserves an apology.

• save us Nico Marlet we miss you.

I was fully prepared for this to be a nightmare level shitshow but I don’t think it’s total garbage. At worse I’ll laugh at it with my friends, at best it’s a masterpiece either way I’ll be going into cardiac arrest

I don’t want to completely trash it because it hurts me a little for some reason and I don’t think it deserves it but I’m more then open to some playful mockery.

It did knock my socks off but I didn’t need to be hospitalized. Mostly feeling vindicated because my visions prophesied all of this actually.

#kung fu panda #lord shen #dreamworks #kung fu panda 2 #kung fu panda 4 #tai lung #the real kung fu panda 4 was the friends we made along the way

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saskiacornelli · 6 months ago

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Quotes that made me feel shit

“Our love wasn’t the kind of love that was written in the cards… it was the kind of love that burned them.”

“Do villains have hearts baby?”

“Always a rebel, forever a soldier, one as a lover, the other don’t bother.”

“Always a rebel forever soldier, one as a lover, the other forever

“I fed them chaos… …so they swallowed me whole. “

“I prefer the men who lurk in dark, dusty corners. After all, that’s where all the secrets lie.”

“You only think I’m perfect because you haven’t seen my soul”.

“The thing about the people who know how to ignite your rage are usually the only people who also know how to put it out”.

“A smile is strong enough to conceal sadness, because it’s easier for people to acknowledge that someone is happy, rather than offer sympathy for another’s desolation.”

“She wasn’t pretty or attractive. She was damn right lethal and she fucking knew it.”

“I was a Doll, but I wasn’t made of plastic. I was constructed of the names of all those who’d wronged me…”

“All three of us lived with damage. None of it made sense, the pieces didn’t fit; until we met each other.”

“Love will never die if it exists on the lips of death.”

“Once you’ve tasted the bitter tang of sin on the tip of your tongue, you’ll do everything you can to drink from its poison for the rest of your life.”

“I live for chaos. I bathe in it, dance in it, and fuck in it”

“People who know too much are walking time bombs, ready to explode and exploit at any moment. They have too much control.”

“You are brutally beautiful in your own way”

“Knock knock, bitch now let the devil in”

“Stuck between a rock and a hard place, so I dug her fucking grave screaming, this bitch can’t be saved”

“Fuck love, but it’ll fuck you too…”

“I’ll take away your sadness with my deranged madness.”

“The most beautiful faces hide the darkest souls.”

“Could the same hands that end lives be the same ones to make mine come alive”

“In the dark is where wilted flowers grow, they get watered with the blood of his enemies and the fluid from my broken heart.”

“A wish is just a sentence that’s said aloud in the hopes of it coming true.”

“You’re not just a switch for my humanity, you’re a goal trigger for my rage too.”

“I’d much rather sleep in darkness. It’s where my thoughts reside.”

“My knight was darkness, fighting fire with fire- I fought darkness with darkness.”

“In our world of shattered reflections that look back at us, I’m the girl who wants to dance with the devil.”

“I was light, and I was pure until I wasn’t.”

“Your mind is like your very own diary, locked and sealed between the gushing of blood that is being courted through the fibers of your cranium.”

“The devil should run.”

“I was made for war, not for love. I don’t want to break people. I want them to be broken already. I don’t want to feel that way, but I can’t help myself.”

“Love is savage, love is blind, love is something they may not find…”

“The most crippling pain

That comes isn’t from losing your lover, it’s from losing something that was so precious that you didn’t deserve it to begin with.”

“Some angels have the devil on their side…”

“Love doesn’t care who it destroys to get what it wants.”

“His eyes were the entrance to Hell, and every time he looked at you, he would draw you in closer to the burning iron gates.”

“Lost can be whole again once it has been found.”

“To rare for earth, too doomed for heaven.”

“If he wants a show I’ll give him mayhem.”

“I don’t care if I will fall in love with a devil, as long as that devil will love me the way he loves hell.”

“He set fire to the world, but never let a flame touch her.”

“His love is aphotic, but she’s willing to drown in it.”

“He held a darkness that could never be touched. She carried a light that could never be seen.”

“A dream is just a nightmare wearing makeup.”

“There’s no price to power; there’s just blood.”

“He told me he loved me. And that may be true, but the only thing left between us, is broken and strewed.”

“Till death we don’t part because even if we do die, our souls still continue to find each other.”

“This world was all fun and games right up until the finally came.”

“I’ve always been one that would prefer to dance with danger than walk with the mundane.”

“To all the fuckers who said I would never amount to anything.

*grins*

Sup.”

The devil furnishes his darkest souls with the prettiest smiles.

And as I was in the darkness so darkness I became.

Most people want to be the sun that lights up your life, but I’d rather be the moon that shines don on you in your darkest hours

Our love tore everything apart… including each other

Tricksters don’t have hearts. They just pretend they do.

Trouble never looked so fine

She knows who she is. She just forgot it for a little while.

Tell the wolves I’m home

Family ain’t who your born with. It’s who you die for.

What if the same hands that soothe me are the same hands that harm me

I kind of want to eat u rn

Later. I want to play first

My karma may be a bitch, damn that bitch is beautiful

I was the trick that they could never play.

She was the greatest game of all…

There was elegance that comes from being carved from the ashes of all the darkness that surrounds you in the world.

You start as dust, and you end as dust. At least that’s what I always thought.

I wasn’t someone who needed protecting… they were.

People whispered his name in fear. I screamed it when he was in between my thighs.

You may be a princess on the streets and people may fall to their knees in your presence, but in here? You’re my little fucking toy, and the only one kneeling will be you.

I was her weapon but she forgot to protect her heart.

She wore a thousand faces all to hide her own

Who needs enemies when you have memories that torture you all the time

They say drowning is the most peaceful death, I can imagine why.

To protect a monster, one must be a monster

The darkness has always lingered inside me, I’ve just subdued it by feeding it my fears

When you’ve been raised by monsters, they teach you how to exist with them

A killer’s love is as violent as the art in which they take lives.”

Cheers to more bodies dropping. As the old saying goes, may they all rest in pieces.

He exists within darkness so that I can be the light to guide him home

She can see through people. Their lies, their secrets, and the decayed skeletons they try to hide in their closet

In or messed-up way, the Cherry will always symbolize our bond. We grew as a pair from the earth and shared the same flesh and blood. When one is disconnected from the other, we rot and die. I rot…. And die

Betrayal is a poison , and once you taste it, you can’t get it out

My life is full of messy people who don’t always make the right choices

Before he was the Devil’s pet… He was mine.

They killed lots of people, but they would hug me if I’m crying

She was fearless, and crazier than him. She was his queen. And god help anyone who disrespected his Queen

I’ve seen the devil more than I’ve seen god

The prettiest smiles hide the darkest secrets

The prettiest eyes have cried the most

The kindest hearts have felt the most pain

You thought you could live like a saint but forgot that you’re claimed by am Antichrist

Beauty is the deadliest curse of all because it tricks you into thinking you’re attracted to it

People don’t just disappear, other people just stop looking for them

There was a women who also sought the light but it burned her and she fell into darkness

I’ve always loved messing with people who try to hard at life

They wanted to own me… I just wanted to survive them

He wasn’t cold to be cruel. He was cold out of necessity to survive a brutal world.

I think I scare him as much as he scares me

The foe, the weapon, the ruse, the liar

Not all soulmates are lovers

Bloodied and broken with the kind of torment that breeds, but never dies.

A story about two souls destined to be together, but who are trapped in bodies that hate each other

The stories would never die… not until the real one at least has been told.

It all started with a game. The kind of trickery that poisons your heart because it knows the mind is week

A daughter, a friend… a liar

To the people that fuck red flags. Saddle up.

Hades hollow has a secret, and like the bones of our ancestors that live beneath the waters here, it should stay dead.

He had eyes that matched the gates of hell and an air about him that made all the warning bells inside my head go off

I have to know what freedom tastes like on the tip of my tongue

The worst part about regret is the fact that you do t know when it’s going to hit you.

The only people who get killed are those ignoring the signs.

Diavoli dell’oceano (The devils of the ocean)

Who you are today will not be who you’re going to be tomorrow

He was everything bad that no one should ever want, much less a Queen

There are whispers that go through the streets, and all of them begin and end with us

Bloodied and broken with the kind of torment that breeds, but never dies

Make the high and mighty low arrogant creatures down you go

If I can't have you, my love, I'll destroy you!

if he loves another and gives his heart, then magic will appear and everything he loves will die

Sleeping flame, I summon thee / To your form return / Make the night as bright as day / And burn, baby, burn!

Break my heart. Break it a thousand times if you like. It was only ever yours to break.

When it comes to the high seas. Not all monsters lurk beneath the surface

Never break in somewhere unless you know the way out

The only ones that aren’t afraid are the monsters

It’s always the prettiest girls who think they’re ugly

"If it's death that I've chosen, then so be it. Let it flow through my veins."

Sometimes you think you want to disappear but all you really want is to be found

I was so lost in hatred and revenge. You stole what was left of my heart

You think no one loves you, and yet you attracted the devil babygirl

Evil queens are just princesses that were never saved

If you treat me like a game, then I’ll show you how it’s played

If I can’t have you my love, I’ll destroy you.

Beautiful boy, you don’t even realize that some people look at your madness and see nothing but grace and brilliance

Why should I apologize for the monster I’ve become? No one ever apologized for making me this way

If I can still breathe I’m fucking fine

Didn’t your mother ever tell you to never shake hands with a demon

Never hide your bad side to make someone stay, show your bad side and see who will stay

People don’t change. They reveal who they really are

Someday someone will break you so badly that you will become unbreakable

I’ll never be that me again

Fuck death till us part. Hell better lock its gates if I ever loose you.

To the girls who think that the grim reaper will fuck like a god

When we’re young we’re taught the distinction between a hero and a villain, good and evil, a savior and a lost cause. But what if the only real difference is who’s telling the story

I found my own light when you left me in the darkness

Hell is empty and all the devils are here

The people that are the most broken and the saddest are the ones that would do absolutely anything for anyone else.

Sweet as sugar cold as ice hurt me once, I’ll break you twice

She wanted to feel loved without feeling like she was begging for it

She’s fading away slowly and not noticing

She passed her hardest moments alone when everyone thought she was fine

He’s not gods disciple he’s Lucifer’s little bitch

Don’t enter the den of wolves and ask not to be bitten

You’re my heaven and I’m your hell

I want toxic. I want madness. I want someone who makes me question my sanity

They say even monsters have weaknesses

Yeah, he is a liar. But he’s a liar that loves you

To the girls who fall for villains… Their hearts are only black until you tear them out

He was always there to take my hand… even if it was to lead me straight to hell.

Every time you fall, I’ll catch you. Even with blood on my hands

You’d lose your mind trying to understand mine

And suddenly, sadness turns to anger

My mother didn’t raise a fool. A psychotic cold-hearted bitch, but not a fool

Some children are simply born with tragedy in their blood

Quietly she fell apart

I wanted to feel love without feeling like I was begging for it

Personally I’m both fucked-up and misunderstood

But it made you stronger

I was a child

I didn’t need to be stronger

I needed to be safe

I feel like it’s my anger that has helped keep me alive

Being raised by cold eyes taught me not to cry

Run, and when you come back burn this place to the ground

So heartless yet so full of feelings

I have slit throats far more beautiful then yours

A part of me always knew you weren’t villain in my story

They were the product of every nightmare you were told as a child, only now, they don’t go bump in the night.

They throw parties to conceal your morbid games, and leave behind the chaos that can never be tamed.

My biggest fear is that you see me the way I see myself

Abuse can feel like love.

We are all born beautiful. The greatest tragedy is being convinced we are not.

The problem with trauma is it leaves its scars behind, so it knows exactly where to find them again when it comes back. And it does, it always comes back.

Yeah I’ve done some pretty horrible things to survive but unlike you poor, delicate, (insert there name) I deal with my shit. You wouldn’t last one day without everyone fawning over you.

I am the object of his art, his desire, and his depthless scorn

When you make someone fall in love with the darkest parts of you, there’s nothing you can do that will scare them away.

This shadow ruined every expectation I had of seeing the light

I fell so deeply that I’ve found myself in the devils lair being feasted on from the dark god himself

Humans don’t need to decorate themselves in gory make-up and fake blood to be scary. It’s the insides of us- the darkness that lurks beneath the surface that’s what truly fucking terrifying.

The fun has only just begun little mouse.

When he walks through the room, it’s like the darkness cringes to him. He is darkness.

They’ll soon realize that I sit on the fucking throne, and their nightmares, bow to me.

You might be a psycho, but you’re my psycho, and I’m yours

To the world, she is formidable.

To me?

She is the world.

I was certain I would never love him. And now that the rain has calmed, my resolve has shattered, and I’m left with a screaming heart and a silenced world

For centuries. Both of us wearing different faces, inhabiting different bodies. But the same souls, colliding over and over, until this planet decides to crumble and our souls have nowhere else to go

Parsons Manor will always be destined to be the house that burns and takes lives

I always thought I would be protected. Untouchable. I thought I was unbreakable, but I’m the right hands, anyone can be fragile.

When love grows where have was planted, you don’t get flowers. Just thorns.

Pretending your demons don’t exist doesn’t make them stop chasing you… only slows the race.

He saw the devil in her beauty, she saw the beauty in his darkness

Life was nothing more than a mask used to forgive someone for all the wrong they did. Love didn’t exist. Obsession did.

In darkness, even the violent burn of hatred could lead you home

Cunning. Unexpected. Not to be fucked with. Gentle but not soft.

Forgiveness wasn’t a currency I’d ever spend. If you crossed me I’d simply make you pay.

People don’t tell you their lies. They show them.

In sin, and until the last drop, long live the EKC until our hearts stop

I’d felt the thunder of her dark side over the years, but I was yet to taste its rain.

The weight of love can be trained to straighten you, or it will be the anchor that drowns you.

Love is like cocaine. Easy to snort, hits fast, but then you realize it’s not worth it.

Betrayal is a wound that most girls cannot forget, it cuts deeper than love itself. That’s why it lingers in our blood as a reminder to us that men like (name) exist, and why at the end of the day, they’ll only ever be some guy you thought you loved

To love a beast, you must be a best.

They say you could feel the shadow of death before it took you. And tonight, that shadow was here

If I wasn’t so tired, all I’d be able to feel are the new wounds over my heart.

The hardest part about sharing any kind of trauma with people is sometimes, we don’t want to give the ones we love the pain that we’ve held on to

What’s your favorite food?

If you let me taste you, it might just be you

I am strong. I am wild. I am a survivor

Are you still a survivor if you can’t remember the darkest part of your memories

Hit him hard and hit him deep. Strike the heart and make him weep.

Mater et luna voco, redde unde exierunt, Cinis cinerem. Pulvis sunt pariter

This women came straight from the pits of hell. She’s strong, smart, and cunning.

I heard true love never dies, but your love killed me.

She was wild but loyal

She was like the moon, part of her was always hidden away.

She was wild but loyal

She was the type to fall in love with the stars and everything that was beautifully unreachable

Her angel eyes saw the good in many devils

The devil furnishes his darkest souls with the prettiest smiles

He came into this alley as the predator. He’ll die as the prey

To defeat a monster, you have to be twice as monstrous. To love a monster, you have to share your soul

They took too much. Left too little. I had nothing to lose, until him.

My mind is whole, even if my soul is not.

She’s resistive and unattainable. She has everyone yearning for her attention, only to feed them crumbs

I’ll pain the town red just like they painted the streets with our blood

The time for secrets is over. Tell my story. Save your soul.

I thought love would rip my heart out.

I thought it would set me on fire.

Instead, it turned me to ice.

I’m still the twisted monster in the night while your the honest hero in the light

Mentally, I was a slut. Physically, I was terrified of intimacy. Spiritually, I didn’t like men.

You walk a fine line between macabre and uncharacteristically psychotic

Seduce and destroy

You can play hard to get all you like. I fucking love the chase.

And I like to run

Let the games begin baby

With the fallen, I rise

With the broken, I cry

With the lost, I find my own

With the outcasts, I am home

With the forgotten, I remember

With the chaos, I am centered

With the wrong, I find the right

With the exiled, I will fight

To all the book sluts who go feral over masked strangers that fuck like they kill… I got you

She was the sea. Calm but so deep

She was like the moon, part of her was always hidden away

Take my hand, take my whole life too and dance with me in the dark

The Devil and I get along just fine

Divine violence

A Prophecy of Secrets & Poison

Secrets are cancer, so here’s a truth. I know yours. They were never meant for you!

It’s crazy how trauma makes you push people away when all you want is love

If they tried to take her from him, he’d rip the world apart with his bare hands. And for some reason that didn’t scare him

She’ll know all my secrets except one: that I’m in love with her

In the trauma of my death, I became the Aglaeca. Those who died by the monster's hand had already been warned. They made their choice. Just as you did.

They say I’m emotionless. I’m not. Because I hated her.

It’s giving little red riding hood if she loved the wolf

They created a monster and asked why I bite

He wanted to play games… but forgot who he was playing with

Love is a theme park, so let’s burn this bitch down.

They say true love never dies. But they never cut deep enough

She tried to hide her demons… so I ripped her apart to get them. Wonder if they tasted the same way they did all those years ago

They had the kind of love…that should never exist

#quotes #quoteoftheday #books #booktok #relationship #toxic love #toxic relationship #toxic people #forbidden love

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bereft-of-frogs · 6 months ago

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Ok I really meant it when I said I was starting a detox, I literally put a sticker on my phone screen over where the ‘for you’ tab is so I do not click it. (Dw it’s on a screen protector that I need to replace anyways.) On my laptop, I have a filter setup, but I can’t find one for iOS apps and I’m unwilling to fully delete the app so sticker it is. If anyone knows of a blocker to only block a specific function of an app so I can get rid of the sticker lmk

I am a little sad because I’m going to miss some bonkers takes, funniest I’ve seen under the cut

- Vernestra is the Sith Lord. Look, I know everyone wants a twist villain but genuinely, it would take both Justina Ireland and Leslye Headland coming in person to my home and explaining themselves for me to accept this one. (My money is currently on Koril.)

- Indara plans and insists on the massacre and everyone else’s guilt is from being unable to stop her. ???? This is one of those ones where I just think we’re somehow watching different shows, if you think the character we’ve seen so far would be like ‘hey guys I think we should unprovoked do a bunch of murder’. This post was specifically like ‘and Sol tries to stop her!’ which like, were you in the bathroom for the part when Indara thinks Sol is going for his saber and warns him off of violence? Also they seemed to still be on good terms after, you’d think if your colleague was like ‘yay massacre’ and you nearly died trying to stop them you’d distance yourself a bit, or at least maybe not try so hard to solve their later murder.

- I also think it’s deeply funny how many posters watched an episode with two groups in conflict, and decided that one of those groups would 100% be down to commit an unprovoked massacre. And it’s crucially not the group that literally plans an unprovoked massacre on screen 😂 no seriously. Out loud. After the confrontation at the ritual in the advisors meeting, Koril is like ‘we make our move tonight’, which for a second I thought meant they were going to flee and then she’s like ‘there’s only four of them, who would miss them’ because she definitely means ambush and kill them. And I know the whole point is we haven’t yet seen the other perspective, it’s possible the Jedi ARE saying the same thing on their ship but like. Given what we’ve seen so far, I think it’s funny how much posting has been dedicated to ‘No for sure the Jedi WOULD murder these innocent people unprovoked’ when…well that’s true of the other side actually 😂

*also I rewatched that sequence to double check it was not me misinterpreting, and I’m so obsessed with Koril calling the Jedi ‘deranged monks’ 😂 that was so funny

- someone saying Mother Koril deserved better which hm. Did she tho? 😂

In conclusion: I’m not confident I’m spelling ‘Koril’ correctly but I’m too afraid of finding more deranged takes to check anywhere. 😂

I will miss some of the more wild theories. I will not miss the usual mundane sniping. Goodbye for you page, and good riddance.

ETA A THEORY THING: I think people are making too much of the Barash Vow. Ok maybe not the suicide, but Dez also objectively did nothing wrong except be a little impulsive and not look before he leapt, and he does it at the end of Into the Dark. I wonder if it ends up being a trauma thing from having your mind/sense of self being overridden by the dark side, we don’t know yet really what the whole ‘eyes turn black’ thing is, but judging by Aniseya’s line about ‘returning your padawan to his right state of mind’, it doesn’t seem that dissimilar to the Drengir poisoning and brainwashing Dez?

my episode 3 thoughts:

we are definitely missing like at least 60% of what’s going on yeah we’re getting rashomon’d

related: disney really continues to struggle with how to break season arcs into episodes, this would have been much better with some kind of framing device in the ‘present’ to anchor the flashback, it is otherwise just unmoored, and this was also my critique of Andor (as one of the like 5 people who didn’t love Andor) that they struggled with the structure of the season as a whole, it turns out that hiring a well-regarded tv writer doesn’t do the trick, this has to be something coming from above which is odd and this is my only coherent #critic thought

guy who got really obsessed with the path of the open hand while reading the phase II novels: I’m getting a lot of path of the open hand vibes from this

I would 100% be enjoying this more if I hadn’t had my brain steeped in like a decade of poisonous internet discourse, forgot my whole plan to (yes ironically) remove the locked tomb from my brain so I could experience it for the first time again, if I were given the opportunity to remove any one thing from my brain like it never existed it would be the built-up plaque of scorching hot takes that have me preemptively cringing at things I’d actually really be vibing with. I need a cleanse or something. Detox.

um torbin is a baby wtf do they do to him. must protect. don’t like this. ☹️

also that one line where that one witch was like ‘who would miss them’ and everyone acted like that was a terrible suggestion but judging by past murder cult experiences yeah it probably actually would have been fine RIP Kevmo and Zallah sorry that guy took the scenic route to report your murders and apparently no one else noticed you had been turned to dust

these have been Thoughts.

ETA in the morning, slightly more coherently: I did like this episode a LOT more than the first two. Like after the first two I was like ok let’s give them a chance to see where they’re going. This is the first one to make me go OH #intrigued. Maybe just because I’m a sucker for cults. Actually really looking forward to next week this time.

#star wars #ban violation #the high republic #the acolyte spoilers

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cassatine · 2 years ago

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I would love to know your ideas about Daemon/Rhaenyra and their deranged love!

Ongoing manifesto is [here]

that being said idk that’s a bit. too vague and open-ended a question. pls be more specific next time but for now:

They’re the same person in different bodies and they both looked at their mirror self and thought yeah I’d tap that?? And after ten years of separation, ten years of distance from the mirror self, the only one that truly understood them: I’d rather burn the world down I’d rather be feared than live without that again?? Heights of Targ psychosexual fuckery right there!!

They both subscribe to the idea that only dragon people are real people! Targaryen exceptionalism all the way for them. Why do you think even Rhaenyra’s love for Alicent did not translate to understanding or protection or anything beyond ‘love me fear me adore me’.

Not to deny the unhinged romanticism of the “meant to burn together” line but what I’m personally obsessed by is “they will fear what else we might be capable of”, like that’s their thesis statement and political program rolled into one and it’s hot as fuck. Also stupid as fuck, because that program hasn’t worked out that well for any dynasty in the long term, like, ever, but also: better burn together than keep on living a half life. Viserys called them “restless and chaotic” back when he first thought they’d shagged and really, he’d pegged them right. They tried normalcy (as much as feudal people with pet metaphorical nuclear weapons can be normal) and it turned out to suck ass — “happy enough”, says Daemon of his time with Laena (which, ouch), “droll tragedy”, says Rhaenyra of her life, of her years trying to play by the rules (also ouch). And they’d have gone back to it if not for each other — one spousal funeral reunion shag of tenderness and they were like “meant to burn together” never gonna be separated again!! No cost too dear!!

I get that the argument that they’re getting married for political reasons only get people’s hackles up, and lbr it is on the level of saying water is dry, but imo swinging the pendulum to the other extreme (nothing to do with the political at all) isn’t that much better in the end. It is a political partnership. Rhaenyra doesn’t say “with you as my husband and prince consort my claim wouldn’t be so easily challenged” for people to say that she hasn’t taken the political repercussions of a wedding into account. And whether Rhaenyra is really, really crap at maths or whether she’s fudging the numbers because she wants Daemon that bad (it’s the later, of course it’s the later), the fact is that she makes a political argument for their getting married. Sometimes people both want to climb each other and to be a political power couple steamrolling all opposition until everything explodes in their face (better have everything explode in your face than go through life like you’re already dead for one minute longer than needed).

Rhaenyra has it bad for Daemon, but she has it bad for the throne too. If she didn’t she’d cut her losses and they’d move to Pentos or wherever, and she is very much not gonna do that. They love each other insanely, but they love power too.

Laenor is a darling and we love him but by ep7 it’s kinda obvious that while Rhaenyra does like him she’s been disappointed in him as a political partner for a while (ftr it’s understandable that he’s flaky, what with the trauma of what happened re: Joffrey). He gives her the ‘ready to commit now’ speech and for ten years she’d have had to take it even with no way to know whether Laenor would follow up on it, because she had no other option, but alas for him he gives her the speech after Daemon pops up, freshly single, while the situation with Alicent and the Greens hits No Return Point, and Rhaenyra says: actually yes I deserve a husband that supports me, a political partner I can actually trust to look after my interests, one who will kill a bitch for me, and that ain’t you.

She didn’t free Laenor!! It’s not a victory for the gays!! She functionally exiled him because she chose Daemon over him. She told her husband and friend of ten years to fuck off to Essos and never come back and let his family believe him dead because her mirror self was back and it’s her mirror self she wants. Let her and Daemon be selfish on that one instead of dressing it up as a victory for us queers.

Everyone goes on about Rhaenyra having a case of gender, and she sure fucking does, but you know who else does? Fucking Daemon, that’s who. Viserys says he’s the Visenya of the family. He straights up wields Visenya’s sword. He was sent off to Runestone where his wife was in charge, and where all that would have been expected of him was to do the do and bring forth some heirs, which in Westeros is what's expected of women (also he’d obv. have resented being married to a normie and not another Targ, because only dragon people are real people), and being a cursed mix of extreme insecurity and overblown dragon pride he simply couldn’t handle any of it, hence the extremely unhappy wedding with Rhea, but also his tendency to overperform masculinity à la westorosi (violence). And yet he’s gonna fucking kneel to Rhaenyra!!

Daemon is literally going to crown her!! I am the crown (I am the realm) she told Criston and what’s the one title Daemon will take? Protector of the Realm. He’s going to die for her!! Fighting her war!! Just like Rhaenys died fighting Aegon’s war!!

Ok. Look. Wherever canon goes — at the end of the day some people see incestuous legacies fuckery and like clockwork they go, oh the latest generation has to fuck and do it in full ancestors cosplay while insistently calling each other by familial relationship terms, and they have to make it weird for everyone else, and they also have to kill a lot people to maintain their grasp on power, and by some people I mean me.

#house of the dragon #daemyra #daemon targaryen #rhaenyra targaryen #meta #the rhaenys wannabe agenda #ask #anon

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hoodoobarbie · 4 years ago

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The mythology of the Siren, Mermaid, Water Spirits & Mami Wata and it’s origins within black feminity.

Today I had to listen to other another black woman rant about how mermaids/sirens/mami wata are evil low key. So this educational post was born in response.

Did you really think the divine essence of the black feminine wouldn’t protect itself ? That energy exists for a reason. Suddenly it’s evil, to have teeth and protect yourself from predators. Water is a precious resource. You will be tested to see if you are deserving of it or not. Also these spirits will defend natural resources so they don’t get fucked up by human greed.

It’s common for some places in Africa for people to offer the Sirens/Mami Wata/Water spirits or make an offerings/contracts with them in order to use the resources on their land. It also keeps the white ppl away too because they cause so much trouble.

Sirens are also associated with being the killers of children and men, but often this is completely misrepresented intentionally.

Men fear the power of the siren because she can override the patriarchy at core and can completely unravel them. The orgins of many water spirits lie in matriachal societies, temples divine feminine and motherhood. This is why temples and sacred magikal knowledge was intentionally destroyed and stolen, especially to empower the white patriarch.

Sirens are also described as thiefs of children and child killers. Sirens have been known to kidnap kids who were being abused or have were murdered near water and take them to their kingdom to restore them.

Sometimes the child returns, sometimes they are not. However in general they are big on kidnapping people, mostly women and giving them powers, if they decide to return. The idea of them eating and killing children, was a lie perpetuated by Greeks to cover up some truly horrific acts. Unfortunate these false accusations have been allowed to continue to perpetuate.

If a siren is acting in a predatory way, there is a reason why as their energy as been disturbed. Sirens are natural guardians.

So the real question is . . . what did you do ? Did you destroy their habitat ? Abuse a child or a person ? Commit an egregious act against a woman ie rape/murder etc ? Disrespect a sacred place, the land, the seas or rivers ? Steal precious resources that weren’t yours to take ?

These sacred traditions are more than just deities, spirits and our ancestors. All forms of ATR are access to our spiritual mind state as an entire community. When you move in Vodou, you can sense the whole of black consciousness and all of our problem spots, specifically areas that need healing.

Oxum-Oshun, Olokun, Yemaya, the Mami Wata, La Baliene, La Siren, Met Agwe, The Simbi - these are all spirits with a connection to waters. Water is life and has always been inherently associated feminine energy. I’m not going into detail about all these cross connections but let’s chat about La Sirene, specifically.

La Sirene, Queen of all Mermaids is more than just a powerful sorceress and queen of song/music and dreams, she is also a keeper of secrets an a guardian of sacred memories & knowledge.

Many of the souls of slaves, from the Transatlantic slave trade that were thrown off the boats into the ocean are her children, citizens and warriors now. She comforts them eternally & they live in paradise. That doesn’t mean all of these souls are at rest, plenty continuously ask their mother if they will be avenged, especially the young children. She also has a close connection with the Indigenous Taino. The isle of Hispaniola also known as Haiti (Ayiti) & the Dominican Republic is her most known domain.

Let’s not act like slavery and colonization was a cake walk. Rape was common place and mermaids, water spirits offered African and Indigenous women protection and power over men. They became demonized overtime for their hypnotic powers and killing men, who often overstepped their boundaries. Women could leave offerings to these spirits, work or commune with them and be quickly avenged or gain great power and wealth. All of this was threatening to the white patriarchal standard.

La Sirene’s presence in Haiti and other merfolk tales that float around the Caribbean/West Indies, is not without purpose. She has ties to many people and many different cultures. Her sacred symbols are global. This is why I speculate she is much older than people think. La Sirene, is a fairly young evolution. She clearly has ties to much older things. Her older names might have been lost but she has evolved, to save her self and also document other forgotten elements of history in the process. There are those who speculate that La Sirene is the embodiment of a cross mixed culture, the evolution of Indigenous & African water spirits combined, due to the excess trauma of colonization and so the Mermaid Queen was born. Others will argue that she is the Orisha Yemaya but a newer avatar of her. I hate to argue semantics but I will say this, she exists and her presence is felt to this day, all around the world.

La Sirene is often depicted as a mulatto woman with eyes like the sea but if you have been blessed to see her in dream state, she does appear sometimes as a brown or dark skinned skinned woman of possibly mixed Indigenous/African ancestry with glowing hypnotic eyes. Alot of her older depictions, deal with colorism and slavery, but as things have grown in the modern world this imagery has begun to change. However mermaids, are known for their shapeshifting powers - to truly behold her true form, is a gift reserved for the rare few.

As a keeper of the mysteries, La Sirene also access to many forgotten things in the black subconscious. The element of water is an intensely psychic sign. Water is her domain, and what is the human body 80% of? WATER! The truth does not hide from her hypnotic eyes. This sacred connection to water and her essence, also means you can track forgotten elements black history and connect to other deities/cultures who’ve had contact with her & her whole court or other black water spirits as a whole. So let’s take a short historical trip down memory lane.

The Greeks & Black women. Sirens, Aphrodite, Sibyls and other Children of Water 🧜🏾‍♀️

The deity Aphrodite/Venus is of Grecian and Roman legend.

A little known magikal fact is that Aphrodite/Venus is half siren. She is a child of the water, she was literally birthed this way after Uranus got his balls cut off & thrown into the sea. Much of her Venusian influence and powers of love and beauty come from this element. Now my Mambo doesn’t like mentioning it but Aphrodite, is tolerated by the oceanic court of sirens/mermaids. Any child of water, falls under the domain of the queen. La Sirene has a sort of strange fondness for her and so does Aphrodite for her. However this doesn’t mean they are best friends. It’s tentative friendship at best and comes with some perks. Aphrodite works quickly for children of water sirens and often will send mermaids to her devotees who misbehave. She has deliberately placed me around her people have pissed her off, to cause mischief. She’s quite petty but also very generous. I won’t go as far to dare and say she is in the queen’s court, but she does curry favor with the queen. Being born of water, her half siren/mermaid influence has definitely attributed to legends of her beauty in myth but also her treachery with men 🧜🏾‍♀️😂. She clearly also has some sort of homesickness for the world underneath the water, because many of her offerings are gifts of pearls, kisses, sea shells, beauty products etc. Anyone who serves the Mermaid Queen knows the meaning behind those gifts. If you’re a black gyal with water or siren energy and decide to work with Aphrodite, do it! If you ever irritate her, the least she’ll do is give you pimples and fuck up your skin, she won’t have the full power to completely fuck up your love life like she does with the white girls. And let me tell you, she has completely ruined some white girls lives by giving them terrible lovers or men.

The trident 🔱 is known for its connection in Greek and Hindu cultures. However La Sirene or other African water spirits are depicted carrying it, which is largely ignored in the occult world.

You can track the trident in Hinduism, with the serpent spirits, the nagas or Lord Shiva but let’s focus on it’s Grecian connection. The usage of the trident and Poseidon, even in mainstream society today is associated with him. This lets us know there is a connection between the mermaids, merfolk and La Sirene/African water spirits. Poseidon’s trident was rumored to made in Athens by the Cyclops - this is the city of Athena. So now we can track an element of black history all the way to Poseidon & Athena. Keep that in your thoughts we’ll come back to that later.

Tridents were also used ceremonially in Africa & India as well, as scepters, tribal weapons and religious symbols.

They were also associated with the sea faring people and fishing. It’s highly likely the origins of the trident are cross mixed between these two societies. Indo-African relations, go back to the Bronze age and the Indus Valley civilization. Which means traveling over by sea to reach each other was necessary. There is historical evidence of African millet being found in a Indian city Chanhudaro, including a cemetary or burial ground for African women. Maritime relations between these two groups existed before Grecian & the Egyptian Ptolemaic dynasties.

Now of course there are some deranged historians that will try to whitewash history and say the trident has its origins from the labyrs but the Ancient Greeks & Africans/Indians interacted regularly. The trident also looks nothing like a labyrs, which is quite literally a double sided axe. This is one of the more painful obvious pieces of white washing and historical revisionism.

Regardless, the trident is associated with water, ceremonial/religious purposes, fishing, battling in the coliseum and the symbol of power for a few African, Black diasporian an Hindu deities.

🧜🏾‍♀️ Oracles & Sibyls

Some sibyls/oracles were known to be African prophetesses/Mamissi to the Mami Wata/Sirens in Africa, some were stolen or captured by Greeks or Romans, sold into slavery and made to be oracles, some of whom became quite famous in legend. Their connection to these water spirits, is what gave them their gift of prophecy. Not every sibyl or oracle was African but SOME were. This lead to the sharing and theft of sacred knowledge. It’s likely these women shared this sacred information, with their colleagues, some whom may or may not have been enslaved or kept in these temple and likely this information was traded, for their freedom, power or money etc. This gave way to the usage of sacred spirits and magick being used by men. A great example of this is the snake spirits of the genii, genius spirits (not to be mistaken with genies) and which then evolved into a diluted lesser energy in Greek society being known as daemons (not to be confused with goetic demons) Instead of a woman commanding these specific energies/spirits, the patriarchs decided that these specifics powers were only worthy of being used by men. These spirits were whitewashed, adopted into their religious practices and said to only be given to men at birth. No woman was allowed to possess them anymore.

🧜🏾‍♀️ The whitewashing of Medusa & Lamia.

In mainstream society these two women stories have been white washed but also to hide a very shameful history and narrative. These two were beautiful women, in older stories of black black mythology were known to be black and they were children of water & daughters of the powerful water spirit/snake/siren divine mother/feminine goddess.

Medusa was raped by the GREECIAN GOD OF THE SEA, POSEIDON and Athena covered it up, refused to avenge her and punished her by making her ugly to everyone. It’s speculated in several magikal circles that the snakes in her hair were actually dreads, due to their lack of understanding of black hair and also allegorically might have been a reference to her devotion to the fish or water snake, great mother goddess. A child of the divine feminine, mother goddess was assaulted in a temple by a man and a woman covered it up & celebrated it.

Let’s start there ... cuz this story says a lot! It’s one of the first historical cases in myth that really documents the issues that surround the black feminine specifically and it was intentionally whitewashed. Then to add insult to injury, Athena made her hideous to all men and her chopped off her head and used as a symbol of protection but also a subtle sign of disrespect to the fullest. This still goes on to this day.

In fact ALGOL, the demon star, which is considered to be strongest protective magick talisman in the occult world today is the HEAD OF MEDUSA. The child of water! BITCH! This energy is invoked constantly and the spirit of medusa is never allowed to rest.

However these egregious acts did not come without a price. Athena at time was a goddess of fertility. However desecrating a child of water or the sirens, is seen as an attack by the divine feminine and can will cause people to be afflicted with fertility and other mental health issues as well. This is speculative but it’s also likely that after this they were constantly visited by droughts, floods or repeating issues with water sanitation & purity after this. Lowered fertility rates and miscarriages might be more prominent, for Athenians and Athena devotees & likely continues to this day.

Devotees of Athena may also develop severe issues when it to their mental health because of this connection. They completely lose touch with their feminine energy and become extremely misogynistic after continued work with her.

Not only did Athena, cause Medusa to be seen as hideous throughout the land but she celebrated when she was murdered and proudly wore Medusa’s decapitated head on her shield. From the feminist eye this virgin deity/woman was extremely male identified and adhered to the patriarchal standard. She was tested by the divine feminine and failed.

Even more strange, Athena’s birth allegorically proclaims her essential character: her wisdom is drawn from the head of a male god; the bond of affection between father and daughter; her championship of heroes and male causes, born as she was from the male, and not from a mother’s womb. A dreaded goddess of war, she remained a virgin and a servant of the patriarchal society and remains so to this day. She is the misogynistic cool girl and very asexual at the core. In fact if you explore more of her mythos, it becomes very clear she hates women. I’m bewildered at how she has become associated with lesbians and the feminine at large, when it’s been very clear that she was intent on transcending her gender from the very beginning, but never managed to escape it.

To top it off, I’ll leave you with this quote from Aeschylus’ Oresteia by Athena:

“There is no mother anywhere who gave me birth, and, but for marriage, I am always for the male with all my heart, and strongly on my father’s side. So, in a case where the wife has killed her husband, lord of the house, her death shall not mean most to me.”

Queen Lamia was a said to incredible beauty who seduced Zeus, (a literal man whore) which as made Hera jealous. Hera cursed Lamia with infertility and insomnia. She went insane and is said to have killed her own children and ate them. Zeus is said to be the one who gifted her prophecy and gave her the ability to take out her eyes, so she would not be irritated at the site of other happy mothers.

She became associated with a child eating monster who was half woman and half snake, which ties into the Libyan snake cults. She was associated with phantoms, the shapshifting laimai or empusai and the daemon spirits.

Medusa and Lamia were Libyan by heritage and came from a place in Africa where temples to the water snake mother goddess & divine feminine were common before they were destroyed by invaders intentionally. These women likely had extreme gifts of seduction, mind control and other abilities etc. It’s highly likely that Queen Lamia used her powers of seduction, at the behest of her people to save them from colonization and was demonized for it. Zeus’s temple was in Cyrene in Lybia, so this is far more than an allegorical story. This may be a real life story that was disguised in mythos. Unfortunately deeper research into this subject has turned up many dead ends for me. It’s highly likely Medusa was a priestess of the the matriarchal Mami Watas or water goddess/snake spirits and was likely raped intentionally in Athena’s temple, as a show loyalty to the rising patriarchy by descrating the symbolism of the great mother and the divine feminine. This was likely an attempt to lessen power and status of the matriachal societies that existed at the time. Rape was common war tactic amongst colonizers and news of such disgrace would likely spread like wildfire. This also solidified Athena’s place amongst the male gods and gaining her their respect. Athena and her devotees went a step further to show their allegiance to the patriarchy, by stripping Medusa of her beauty supposedly and exiling her, then parading her decapitated head on shields, when going into battle likely with Libyan enemies.

This is just a brief explanation of a few horrific acts in history, which were whitewashed & explain why the essence of the black feminine has evolved to become more protective, predatory and fierce. She learned to defend herself. Now she kills those who threaten her.

Fun history tip: Usually anytime you see a snake in Grecian mythology, just know something got whitewashed, because the truth was really fucked up, made them look really bad & a black woman was there.

🧜🏾‍♀️ The black feminine is capable of more than you know.

Yes, mermaids/sirens/snakes & the mami watas can be scary at times but that’s what stepping into mysticism of deep waters is like. Water is capable of many things, it is one of the most powerful elements on earth. It can nourish you and kill you, and that’s the beauty of it really.

We should all be grateful the black feminine is so beautiful, fierce & scares the living daylights out of everyone.

You would be dead if it wasn’t.

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bodycountgame · 3 years ago

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For Adegoke Fluff 13. “i didn’t mean to say that but yeah, i love you.” 💞 Though I feel like a bit of angst would make that even better hehe

i didn’t mean to say that but yeah, i love you + adegoke

You storm down the street, your jacket on as you go. In your haste, you just cannot get your arm into the fucking sleeve. While you’re now basically impervious to the London drizzle, it does undercut your anger a bit to be flapping around like a deranged chicken.

“You’re being belligerent,” Adegoke calls after you, and you stop, look back. He’s standing on the pavement with his arms folded, steadily holding your gaze. Solid, unwavering. He’s never been the type to run after you, but he always has a way of drawing you back regardless.

“No, you’re being… irritatingly reasonable.”

And it’s true, he is. You’ve really fucked up this time, and he just… doesn’t seem to care. He just keeps saying very sensible things, calm things - the sort of things you’d expect to hear from a therapist rather than a boyfriend.

“So, what is it you want? For me to get all mad and yell at you and smash some plates? Not all feelings have to be loud to be real.”

What do you want? You don’t really know. Your head has been scrambled ever since you got back. Nothing feels as easy as it used to feel. Everything feels fucking hard. Even getting out of bed in the morning is a challenge - and not in a steamy sexy way.

“I’m not going to just let you walk off, $!{mcname}. I want to talk about this. I love you, and that’s not just… That’s not something I’m willing to just give up on.” Adegoke folds his arms across his chest, wet t-shirt sticking to his skin. He doesn’t seem at all bothered by the cold. He also doesn’t seem to have realised what he’s just said.

You haven’t said that to each other before.

You’ve thought it. You’ve thought it a lot of times – when he wakes you up in the morning with a cup of tea and a kiss on the forehead, when he climbs back into bed with you when he’s all sweaty from his run, when he rests his hand on your leg when you’re sat on the sofa. About a million times a day, actually.

You just haven’t said it yet, because you’re a mess. You’re a mess, and he is just trying to hold you together, and he deserves better.

“Oh,” is all you manage to reply with, which sounds fucking stupid. It comes out all distant and gormless as you walk back towards him. You’re not struggling with your jacket anymore.

Then he realises, but he doesn’t seem regretful. You were worried that maybe he would be.

“I didn’t mean to say that, but yeah, I love you.”

“Saying something you mean? Doesn't sound like you.” you smirk, digging your hands into your pockets as you reach him. At least, you hope it looks like a smirk - you might be too nervous for it to be all that convincing. You look into his deep brown eyes, and they remain steady as they look back into yours.

“I said that I didn't mean to say it, not that I didn't mean it. I do.” A smile slowly spreads across his face, and it looks much lighter than yours feels. Easy. Confident. “Do you love me?”

“Of course, I do,” you breathe back, because you just know that you do. And now you know that he really isn’t going to let you leave.

Even if maybe he should.

“Good. Then let’s go back inside, and I’ll get mad and yell and smash some plates for you, and then we’ll get on with our lives again. Okay?”

#i don't normally use name tags in prompts but adegoke just loves calling people by their name he can't help it lmao #in which BC MC is a mess AGAIN jflskjfds #ch: adegoke #drabbles

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wainwrightjakobshammerlock · 1 year ago

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- Ahem. - Zane coughed, drawing attention to himself. - Boyos, ladies, bots and every feckin' other concievable point on, around and beyond the spectrum, we're gathered here today to get these two gentlegeezers married again, because the last wedding got interrupted by a bunch of shitehead tentacle-faces. Blah, blah, whatever. If any of you object to this union, speak now and get shot or shut yer japes forever.

[...] Sure, sure. Was that before or after the automaton-assisted murder?

But his beloved has forbidden him from going out until he recovers, and a Hammerlock never betrays someone's trust, especially if that someone is a person they care about. At least, that's what his family liked to tell themselves - they usually didn't actually obey that rule. [...]

[...] I AM ETERNAL, INVINCIBLE. - the meat walls close in - I KEEP MYSELF ALIVE. - the staircase flattens into a slope - I LIVE IN MY OWN GLORY, MY OWN PERSONAL LIGHT, WHERE THE SHADOW OF PAIN 'N' PAST CANNOT TOUCH ME. - the voice laughs one last time.

We both recognize what needs to be done, an’ that’s when you allow me. [...] I once mapped these lines, charted ‘em, and now I’m ripping ‘em like an old shirt’s seams.

You are a manor onto yourself. [...]

- You care for those you love, an' they care right back. Least, that's what my father told me, or to be precise, what I understand from what he told me. It's confusin' sometimes. - Wainwright chuckled. - Now, eat. You deserve it.

There was another constant now, one that he also loved. This one wasn't so chaotic - quite the exact opposite, in fact.

[...] asinine reasons are why this planet’s still kickin’. Either they were gon’ go crazy - like they did - or die.

[...] Wainwright recalled the last time he was in there: an unfinished taxidermy on the table, sketches of various creatures on the floor, a half-empty cup of tea on the end-table and a scent of dried blood. It was... odd and unfamiliar, yet somehow comforting.

[...] Slightly suspicious, like a burnt smell from the kitchen or a gun not clicking on reload the exact same way it did the last 263 times... but that thought didn't stay in his mind for long.

The beams, the paths, they converge. I- I can’t, oh god. I can’t take my eyes off you. You’re being laid bare before me [...]

[...] he had more time now, time to rest and enjoy himself. In a way, he felt more grounded, leading the mere humble life of a mildly deranged wealthy man who doesn't need to rely on meagre royalties and stretching the allowance his parents gave him when he left his homeworld, never to return there again.

- Not to be all "back in my day" - Wainwright said, his warm voice punctuated by his hands pinning the buttons of his shirt - but these days, you can just walk up to a Quick-Change an' will yer dick 'n' balls into existence. When I was a boy, we had to get ourselves the long way.

By jove, you look handsome. A carbon tesselation [...] You reflect my light like a fine mirror, or like a cephalopod mimicking its environs.

Unfortunately, they didn't have the time to savor its flavor properly. They were in too much of a hurry to savor its flavor on eachother's lips.

[...] The blood will split itself, or blood shall be split here.

I find you there, holdin’ me. Me, as a fresh body. You’re surrounded by wonders uncountable and yet only desire one, so you pull me outta there like a sculptor makin’ men from marble. I can feel the love you put into every motion of this needle, every slash of that knife. Eternally preserved as part of your heart.

Wainwright felt his own eyes grow heavy with affection, his mind waning like a celestial body with a name lost to time. [...]

The over-man is three meters tall. [...] throwing bread to the oviraptucks in the lake with two hands, and sketching their anatomy with a third. The pencil is too small for it, yet it doesn’t break.

Well excuse me, Sir Jakobs, I can't exactly use your last name like anyone else, now can I? / Is that not because you stole it, Mr. Hammerlock? / And you stole mine, Sir Jakobs. / That is not an excuse, mister. / It's called gettin' even, sir. Frontier justice, if ya may. / I say, I say. If so, then I shall "get even" for all this affection you've given me, mister.

Your arms. Yes, yours. Therein lies the promise of that great and terrible feeling of safety.

- I... I know you love me. You have said that a thousand times, and proved it at least thrice that number. [...] But sometimes I'm afraid I'm just not the man you fell in love with anymore. It has been years, dear. So much has happened since then, and I sometimes fear what might happen next.

[...] I can't help but feel I am the one with my neck exposed, here. / I am always that when I am with you, in a way. [...]

Alistair raised his head [...] Oh god, he looked so pained.

The word left him like steam from an opened pot. It was not easy to say for him, it never was. But with Winny being the only one to hear it, it was easier.

a slow, groggy settling into rest, like the setting sun and all the beautiful colors coming with that sort of phenomenon. / Alistair’s big, beautiful, brown, blood-and-retina eye - already half-shut - finally closed, the curtains of his bright soul sealed for the day; [...]

[...] did I fucking recognize it then. Hard to not recognize that particular mind's eye vision of a certain man when his white suit is soaked through with blood.

- This… erm, reminds me of the time I spent a weekend in a cabin with my first proper long-term boyfriend. Unfortunately, the corporate death squad his wife sent after him cut our stay short…

I retreat to my den to hibernate through the eclipse winter, as an animal does. [...]

[...] Oh, you're so beautiful like this, with your gunpowder curls exposed against the pillow like billowing smoke against the clouds.

[...] You must wrestle the horrors from within yourself and try to make something meaningful out of them. That's the way it always is. That's the way it always was.

Then, you open to me like a door, and I can feel myself sinking even deeper. I embrace this and that of you, the still and beating, and in turn you embrace me from the inside.

Little boy who is a man, where are your friends? [...]

[...] Normally, a female asset is to be inducted at an earlier age, but a procedural alteration had to be introduced, accounting for unforeseen disruption of homeostasis.

[...] Tears poured out of his organic eye like water out of a high pressure pipe. His nose was getting runny, his face was searingly hot. It was so, so, so hard to think like this, the weight of the world closed onto him.

- Well, what else am I supposed t' say? Bastard who caused an entire war to aerate his unleavened bread of an ego?

- Winny, my love, - Alistair raised his head again - would you be so kind as to carry my faggot arse to bed?

[...] that I am a warlock and either should or would be burned at the stake, were it not for my obvious status [...] Baseless rumors aside, things have somewhat changed since that fateful day when Elpis shone bright enough to be visible from here.

It's the crucible, the forge. Can't forge something without hitting it a lot, Father says in one of his many wisdoms.

cant do a proper art vs artist till i get home but haha what if i showed my favorite lines i wrote this year

#text post #my ramblings #self reblog #writestuff #long post #anyways if you havent yet pls check out my ao3 :3 #borderlands #yes all of these lines are from borderlands fanfic

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stressedoutcanary · 3 years ago

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Do You Ever Feel Like A Misfit (Everything Inside You Is Dark & Twisted)

Dick Grayson x Reader

Word Count: 3.5K (I don't know how tf that happened)

Warnings: Explicit language, Blood and Violence, lots of angst, Hurt/Comfort ✌

A/N: Guess who's back! Just for some context the reader is a magic user and her style is similar to that of Zatanna <3

•°•°•°•°

She’d have reasoned with herself that stealing from one of the most secure and heavily guarded safe-houses of a deranged sociopath was probably not the brightest idea she’s had all day. It never even made it on her to-do-list for the weekend, but here she was, running across rooftops, holding on to the stolen totem like her life depended on it, it probably did. The three assassins sent after her were no Lady Shiva or Talia Al Ghul but they weren’t exactly amateurs either. The deep cuts and two broken ribs she got from their earlier encounter were proof of that.

She glanced back and even though there was no sign of her would-be-killers she knew better than to assume they’d just let her be. They were sticking to the shadows, exploiting her blind spots. The only thing she was sure of was that they were still hot on her trail and would happily plunge a dagger into her back given the opportunity.

She was right. As of this moment she hated being right.

She caught the glint of the two sharp objects slicing through the air, hurtling towards her at full speed. A slight shift of her upper body was all she could manage as one of the daggers got embedded right into her scapula while the other one, fortunately so, whirled past her, slightly grazing her left hip. The impact of the blade on her shoulder made her lose what little balance she had left. Despite her best efforts, when the wounded shoulder made contact with the hard concrete, a loud, ear-piercing cry ripped out from her throat before she could push it back down.

Cursing under her breath she knew, she knew all she had were those few seconds of numbness and disorientation to get a grip and figure out her exit strategy. However, all her hopes started to sink as she saw one of the assassins come closer, appearing more of a blur than a person. Then again that was probably because of the nice, little concussion she got from her fall. The assassin walked over to her, unsheathed their sword and placed it right on her neck, blocking any and every way out.

“You were warned. The Demon’s Head does not tolerate treachery. We are here under his orders to bring back the totem along with the witch’s head; your head”

If she could, she would’ve rolled her eyes at the classic villainous dialogues thrown at her.

“Witch? Who’re you calling a witch Snow White? I’m clearly a sorceress, don’t they teach you the difference between the two in assassin school or something? Hell, I’d even let you call me an enchantress, though that name’s already been taken but you get my poin-”

The remaining words died in her throat as the sword on her neck shifted slightly. She knew she had extremely poor self preservation skills considering she’s clearly been instigating the very person sent to kill her, but even she wasn’t dumb enough to keep talking when the tiniest movement on either part could result in her having a severed jugular or carotid.

‘This is a pretty shitty way to die’

She thought back to how she used the last of her mystic energy to hide the totem away before her fall and how stupid that decision really was because now she could actually feel the agonizing pain coming from her shoulder. It started to spread throughout her back like wildfire, eyelids grew heavy against her wishes. Suddenly she felt really tired and the idea to close her eyes just felt so goddamn appealing.

‘No (Y/N) that’s the blood loss talking. Blood loss doesn’t get to make decisions’, she mentally scolded herself, still not breaking her eye contact with the person standing above her.

“Give us what you stole and we shall grant you the mercy of a quick death.”

That made her raise an eyebrow, “Ah, lemme think...the correct response here would be…”, she hummed, making a show of how hard she was thinking about the offer she was granted, “How about a fuck you? How would that do for you?”, she gave them a vicious grin, it was all teeth. They probably weren’t impressed by her response and it showed.

She knew there was no way out but she had promised herself once that if she were to die, that if she ever goes out, she’d be anything but a whimpering and sobbing mess. She was scared shitless, more so than she’d ever been while fending off the league, she won’t deny that but she would rather die than let them know that. ‘Well at least I got that ‘rather die’ part down to a T.’ she thought, eyeing the sharpness of the blade which was now raised up in the air

She felt bad for just giving up the way she did. Her whole life she was told to fight her way through the impossible, to attain the strength rivaling that of Zatanna Zatara, John Constantine and Doctor Fate himself. To be better than them, and there she was lying on the ground limp as a sword came down on her throat; all for a silly necklace. She would’ve huffed out a laugh if only her ribs weren’t broken, if only her body wasn’t screaming in pain, if only she had a way out. She didn’t. She was too tired, too drained, too numb to do anything else. Closing her eyes she stopped fighting, she let her growing unconsciousness claim her.

‘This is what you deserve anyway’, her barely there conscience remarked.

‘Fuck you too.’ she replied.

Everything went pitch black. The darkness encompassing her was peaceful, unlike the pain she had felt before. It was nice for a change. It sounded pathetic but she couldn’t bring herself to care.

•°•°

When she came to, the first thing she observed was the feeling of something soft against her back, next was a dull rhythmic sound which she realized was her own heartbeat. Though opening her eyes was a tiring task. It shouldn’t have been, but it was. She used all the energy she had into it and her eyelids fluttered open. She stared at the white ceiling and stayed like that for a few seconds; a few minutes? She couldn’t tell, but the pain was back now, not too much but enough to tell her it was there, to tell she was still alive.

She saw something shift in her peripheral vision and her body instinctively went stiff. Her mind which was blank before now ran in all directions.

‘Could be Ra’s Al Ghul… Could be worse’, she tried not to think about the worst case scenario, but she knew she had pissed off a lot of beings, beings far more powerful and far crueler than Ra’s himself. An involuntary shudder passed through her at the thought. That must’ve caught her captor’s attention as she felt the person move closer to her. Begrudgingly, she tore her gaze from the spot on the ceiling which she had been staring at this whole time and tilted her head. The man in black and blue who appeared, was probably the last person she had expected to see.

“Nightwing…”

Her voice was barely above a whisper and the hoarseness with which it came out it took her by surprise, but her body visibly relaxed at the sight of the familiar figure, at the sight of someone who would never hurt her.

She watched him pull out a chair from the desk nearby. He sat next to the bed she was lying on and gave her a soft smile, a smile that spelled one word ‘relieve’. She remembered how when she first met him two years ago, she found that particular smile extremely annoying, she had no reason to, but she did. What she couldn’t remember was when she had grown so fond of it.

“How do you feel?”

“Like shit.”

He snorted a laugh which made her pout. She was planning to point out how he was being mean; laughing at her when her response truly defined the way she was feeling, but any words she thought of were cut off by the change in his expression. His smile faltered, lips were now pressed in a thin line, face contorted in a way which showed his genuine concern.

“This is the second time, this week.”

That you almost died, he didn’t say. That I had to save you and bring you back from the clutches of death, he didn’t say.

“I know.”

“That doesn’t make it better.”

“I know.”

The silence that settled, stretched far too long for comfort, but she wasn’t going to be the one to break it. She wanted to, but there was nothing she could say, that would make it better. Nightwing ran his fingers through the locks of hair, burying his face in his hands.

For the first time since she woke up, she took in his appearance, he looked disheveled, his suit was torn in different places along visible faint cuts, most likely he got them when he rescued her. She felt a pang of guilt rising in her chest. He risked his life for her, she knew he had done it before, she didn’t get it then and she didn’t get it now. Why would someone do that? Why would he? She was pulled back from her spiraling thoughts when he spoke again, exhaustion evident in his voice.

“Why are you so reckless?”

“Excuse me?”

She looked at him like he had grown another head. She wasn’t ready for this conversation but by the looks of it they were gonna have it anyway.

“What if I hadn’t been there today? Or any of the other days you almost died. What then?”

“My best guess? I would’ve been dead.”

“And that fact doesn’t bother you at all?!”

She flinched at little when his voice rose, but she stood her ground, at least figuratively since she was still in bed.

“I don’t know, should it?” She didn’t try and tone down the venom dripping from her words. Her words cut deeper than the wounds he got from the assassins; she saw it clear as day on his face. She let out a deep sigh but continued. She had to get it out and he had to hear it, that’s the reason she gave herself for the confession that followed.

“I don’t need your help, Dick. I don’t know what gave you the impression that I did but I’ve never needed it.” She swallowed the lump in her throat. ‘Why was it getting harder to speak?’ “I don’t need you to save me every time. I don’t need you to risk your life for me and I definitely don’t…” She moved to sit up straight, her back resting on the headboard. She shifted her gaze on her open palms resting in her lap; palms covered in blood, in her blood, not very long ago.

“I don’t need you to care...”

The last part was a whisper and Dick was silent, so silent that for a brief moment she wondered if the man she’d come to care about even heard her, admitting something that was so painful for her to say out loud.

Dick moved to sit beside her, his shoulder bumping hers. He didn’t know where all this was coming from but he knew better to leave it unattended.

“(Y/N) I help you because I care about you. I always will, you know that.”

“Why? You have nothing to gain from it”, blinking back the unshed tears in her eyes, she looked at him with a hurt expression as if she couldn’t bring herself to understand.

“Why… as in why do I care?”, Dick tilted his head to look her in the eyes, trying to understand what she meant all the while making sure not to let his own surprise at her words show. She nodded not trusting her voice to not betray her anymore than it already had.

“I don’t care about you because I feel like you need it nor because I would gain something from it”, Dick knew he shouldn’t have to explain it to her. He briefly wondered what she had gone through to make her think that she needed to be useful to be cared for or that she had to need it to be cared for. He felt something pull at his heart at the thought; It was sorrow.

“I care about you because… well I do and there’s nothing you could or couldn’t do to change that. And it is because I care about you that I ask you to be better at taking care of yourself. Now I know for a fact that whatever you stole from The League’s safehouse definitely did not belong there, but I also know that whatever it was, it wasn’t worth your life (Y/N) It never will be.”

Dick grasped one of her hands, interlacing his gloved fingers with hers; she hadn’t even realized she was shaking until he did so. Closing her eyes, she forced herself to take a deep breath despite her protesting ribs. Opening the palm of her free hand she muttered an incantation with practiced ease

“Eveirter tahw saw neddih “, her hand glowed, the golden aura taking the shape of a object. When the light subsided, Dick saw the object in her palm as she rubbed her thumb across it, quietly leaning her head on his shoulder.

“It was this totem. It belongs to Madame Xanadu. Don’t know what Ra’s wanted it for though”, she shrugged as best as she could with an injured shoulder then continued, voice firmer than it had been the whole evening,“ She asked me to retrieve it in exchange for information on a girl I was looking for. The girl was somehow sucked into some other dimension, a mystic one and her mother was so desperate when she approached me that I just couldn’t say no. So when I say the Totem was important, then I want you to know that it really is.”

Dick shook his head at that. “Still not worth your life.”

“Dick…”, she sighed. It was all she could do at the moment because she was really getting tired from all the arguing.

“Do you remember the first time we met?”

“You mean the time I met the infamous vigilante Nightwing in a dumpster of all places.”

“In my defense I was badly injured”, she hummed in agreement.

“You smelled bad”

“You try smelling like flowers after falling from a building and into an open dumpster.”

His playful grumbling pulled a short laugh out of her. She was more than a little confused at the sudden trip into the past but happily accepted it as a change of topic. She should’ve know better than to think he’d have let the matter go.

“Anyway my point is when you saw me that day, you first instinct was to help me. You pulled me out and used your magic to heal my wounds. You didn’t have to. You could’ve dropped me at a hospital. You could’ve even walked away and pretended that you never saw me, but you didn’t. Why is that?”

“Because I thought you were handsome?”, she said trying to lighten this too-heavy-for-comfort conversation he was trying to have.

“Nice try. I know you. You saved me because you cared. You helped me and the Titans save the city more than once because you cared. It is who you are. I’ve seen you care about and worry over complete strangers without conditions. So why do you think that there has to be some kind of a barter system when it comes to you? Why think that I would want to gain something if I cared about you?”

“Because everyone else did.”

The words shot out from her mouth quicker than she realized. She had voiced her greatest insecurity to the one person who never had anything to add to it and Dick’s heart clenched at the implications of her words, ‘She has never been loved unconditionally before’ his brain provided.

The tears she blinked back earlier came back with full force. She felt two strong arms that wrapped around her, all the while being mindful of her injuries. Dick pulled her into a hug and that was it. She couldn’t control the sobs that tore through her throat, the pain in her body flared due her erratic movements. She knew once the tears started flowing they wouldn’t stop at least not for a while, but now that her façade had been broken she couldn’t bring herself to give it another thought.

He waited for her to let it out, let out all the pent up emotions she had. Now that he thought about it he had never seen her cry. He never questioned it, maybe he should’ve.

“I don’t know who’s responsible for hurting you (Y/N), God, how much I wish I did”, his arms slightly tighten around her at that. “I am so sorry that you have felt like you have to have your walls up all the time, even around me and I should’ve seen that, I should’ve realized that before but I didn’t and I am so sorry for that. I can’t undo the damage you’ve endured and I will not pretend that I can. What I can do is promise you that I’d never let you down like that, never.”

The words he spoke were clear. He didn’t try to tell her to put her walls down, to trust him when she had no reason to. He also didn’t need to justify himself or make such over the top promises but it felt nice to hear it. She had already stopped crying the moment he started speaking again but she still had her forehead pressed against his chest, listening to his heartbeat, it was calming in a way she couldn’t describe. She pulled her head back to look at him, and the honesty in his voice earlier matched the one in his eyes.

“Okay”

Hearing her response, he gave her his signature grin. It sent unexpected warmth through her, he always had that effect on her. She was sure she was just blushing at this point and was suddenly thankful for the dim lighting in the room.

She ended up composing herself rather quickly, jabbing a finger at his armored chest with her usual smirk plastered on her face.

“Now that you’ve made that promise, know this, Dick Grayson, if you let me down I will drop a mountain on you.”

“You mean that figuratively?”

“No I mean that geologically”, he waited for her to say she was kidding. She didn’t.

“Alright, alright”, He held his hands out in mock surrender. After considering the look in her eyes, Dick refrained from questioning the feasibility of that action nor did he want to question her magical abilities or intent. Last he remembered, Wally did that and that conversation ended with him being teleported to Sahara and Dick would very much like to avoid the same fate as his best friend.

Deciding that was more than enough exhaustion for one night, he got up from the bed and kissed her goodnight, informing her that he’d be sleeping on the couch so that he wouldn’t accidently hit her injuries in his sleep. She agreed and watched him slip out of the room before falling into the blissful sleep she had been putting off since forever.

•°•°

She knew Dick Grayson was full of surprises but the next morning when he put forward the offer of become a full time Titan, in front of her, she wondered if she fell from the bed in her sleep and ended up getting another concussion because he was so not making any sense.

“So let me get this straight, you want me to come live with you and your superhero friends, in the Titans freaking Tower?!”

“I was hoping for a little less yelling after an emotional evening but yes that is exactly what I’m asking.”

“Dick that’s just ridiculous!”

“Look, you don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

He looked like a kicked puppy which made her feel kinda guilty for all the yelling.

“It’s not that…It’s just there is still a lot about me I haven’t told them. There is still a lot I haven’t told you. I don’t see a reason why you all would want to trust a possible threat, let alone live with it”, she gestured to herself.

Dick felt like there was a deeper meaning behind her words, as if she was voicing her own fear rather than theirs but he trusted her enough to tell him about it when she was ready, on her own terms. He could wait till then but for now he crossed the short distance between them, going around the breakfast table till he stood in front of her. He grasped both of her hands in his and ran his thumb soothingly across her knuckles. He bent down to place a soft kiss on her forehead, and then moved to meet her gaze.

“(Y/N), I know you and I trust you and…It sounds silly considering I was raised by the worlds greatest detective but I believe that you don’t have to know every little detail about someone as long as you already know what’s in their heart.” Bruce probably would’ve disagreed but he wasn’t Bruce.

“And you know what’s in mine?”

“And I know what’s in yours.” His statement was firm and left no room for argument, not when it came to this.

“If you’re sure about this, then I guess...”

“Is that a yes I’m hearing?”, There was that smile again, seriously what was up with him and his smile that made her giddy inside.

In between thoughts she realized he was still waiting for a response so she nodded. Any underlying doubts she had about her answer vanished when she took in how happy it made him. As cheesy as it sounded seeing him happy made her happy. A part of her said it wouldn’t last long, but seeing her boyfriend hop onto the couch full of joy as he called his friends about the latest development in their lives, she wanted to believe otherwise.

°•°•°•°•

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sukirichi · 3 years ago

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Hi! I hope you're doing okay. So I just had a thot. And idk what to do with it. So Imma just put it here cause your blog is my new favourite. I'm not even joking. I literally devoured everything related to Tokyo Rev on your blog. So here's my theory. Do correct me if you think I'm wrong Sensei!

Bouten husbands and where they liked to be kissed the most/ or is their weakness. (Ps: it's just my opinion. I mean no offense to anyone.)

Mikey~ Kiss him on his shoulders and he'll cry. Cause he's been bearing all the burden of his dark and decaying world for so long that he doesn't even know that he needs to take a minute for himself and rely on others around him. Especially since most ppl around him are willing to give their life and limbs for Mikey. He just can't seem to keep that in mind. So you've taken it upon yourself to remind him frm time to time. Just a little peck on his strong and broad-ish shoulders to remind him that he's not alone. That if nothing, he has you. He always will.

Rindou~ Something about being kissed on his cheeks, especially by his lover, does things to him. Like his cardiovascular muscles do a little somersault in his chest or something. Because yes, it doesn't matter if he's one of the big, scary and irreplaceable executive of Bouten, he still has an unconscious inferiority complex. Sometimes it just skips his mind that despite everything, he too deserves the world. And every once in a while you need to remind him about it. That he doesn't have to be flashy and snarky like his brother. He just needs to be himself and that he is undeniably worthy of love.

Ran~ Not many people are taller than him, you are no exception. So it makes sense that in order to kiss him you need to be on your tippy toes. And still you're only able to reach his neck. So yeah, just kiss him there. Right on his Adam's apple and he's a goner. It doesn't even have to be sexual. Ran is always the one to take charge. It's kind of in his nature and you happily oblige him. But every now and then, you also need to remind him to take a breather That he can just let go and get dotted over for a change. You're more than happy to take care of him, that he needs to be taken care off.

Koko~ This man not only, brings in the big dough for Bouten, but also beats up people while at it. To say that he's always overworked is an understatement. His hands are always doing something, illegal things most of the time. He knows he's no saint. That there's no coming back into the light. He's painfully aware. But once e intertwine your hands together and kiss him on top of his knuckles, he swears that it's his redemption. You're the only light in his dark and dangerous world.

Kaku-chan~ Please. Just kiss this man on his forehead. Please. He's literally out there, ready to give his life for the things he wants to protect. He's always doing that. Protecting the people that have gone astray, who have no more hope left. He's ready to die for them, if it means they'll keep going. So please, just once, just protect him instead. Protect him from the demons he skillfully hided in his head. Protect him from the nightmares that torment him every night. Just protect him for a change. He needs it more than he's willing to admit.

Sanzu~ Okay. Hear me out. He's deranged and he knows it. He knows he's won't bat an eye before painfully torturing someone to death. Heck he'll even do it with a smile plastered on his face. He knows that he's stained in blood almost all the time.(sometimes his own, most of the other times, not his own). He'll even relish it. He knows that he's been tainted with burden of death. He knows that he lives in the shadows. He's not sane. He's not good. He's bad. He's ugly. You can tell that these awful thoughts keep him awake at night. So when they do and he has this almost painful look on his face. Just pull him close and kiss him on his face, over and over. Kiss his scars, kiss his lips, kiss his nose, his eyes. Just don't stop until he's got your point across. That yes, it's true that he's despicable. But you still love him nonetheless.

Ps: Sorry that was too long and kinds got out of hand. But these are just my "thots". Thank you for hearing me out!~ Thot anon

hi i’m doing okay, thanks for asking n i hope you are too !! also aaah i’m glad to know my blog is your new fave, i hope you enjoy more of my future tokrev content 🥺 ALSO YES ITS HEADCANON TIME LETS GO LETS GO

mikey n shoulder kisses 🥺 i hc that mikey is stiff and rigid all the time without knowing. like you said, he has a lot on his mind and draken even said mikey had a heavy ass cross to bear, so imagine the weight and burdens he has to shoulder 🥺 so if you lean into him for a hug then kiss his shoulders, mikey deflates. to him, its like a reminder he doesn’t have to carry it all by himself all the time and poor bb forgets that often

cheek kisses for rindou 🥺 the idea of this big, bad executive infamous for breaking limbs but is actually a sucker for cheek kisses and turns into a soft lil bean when you cup his face and just smother him with love n affection? bless. rindou probably unknowingly exerts too much effort sometimes to prove something - may it be his strength, his power, or how he’s perfectly capable of fighting by himself - he’ll have that voice at the back of his head that he needs to do something. giving him cheek kisses grounds him and elicits butterflies in his stomach bcos he realizes that, “oh, i don’t have to try so hard. silly me...now more cheek kisses, please.”

ran and neck kisses !! ON THE FLOOR RN, TELL ME MORE. but yes omg i also hc that ran is such a giver and grown up to look for others the way he does for rindou, so in his head, he’s kind of drilled it into himself that he has to be the one in the lead - not necessarily in a mikey way - but in a “he needs to take charge and take his responsibilities seriously” kind of thing. like mikey, ran is probably often deep in thought as well despite his teasing mannerisms, that when you kiss his neck he can’t help but soften. he enjoys being doted on. loves to be the one on the receiving side. has the sweetest smile on his face when he gets a lil ticklish and he just feels like he’s on cloud nine <33

knuckle kisses for koko 😫 everything you said was on point !! his hands are probably so tired from fighting and counting bills all day, not to mention the amount of paperwork he has to do bcos who else will do them ?? no one knows the inner system of koko and how it works as well as koko does, and he wants to do his job right. he gets a little too absorbed in his work, however, that koko gets a little confused when you take his hands away from whatever he’s working on to leave little kisses at the pads of his knuckles, maybe even massaging his hands or playing with his fingers to help him relax a bit. and you know how koko is so good at what he does bcos its all he knows, but at the same he probably hates how he treads on this dark path ?? so when you kiss his knuckles, he feels relieved. like everything will be okay and second chances are real n something he’s worthy of

omg now this is my favorite - kakucho + foreahead kisses. forehead kisses are always so intimate and soothing in a sense. like come here so you can kiss him on the forehead, watch the way his eyes flutter close and a smile tugs at his lips when your lips trail down to his scar, all the while your hands are cupping his face with such tenderness he never really knew of. kakucho is so used to being the tough guy with his rough childhood that it almost feels surreal. surreal that he’s in bed, with you, safe and sound and you’re kissing his forehead so comfortingly he doesn’t have to worry about putting his walls down for a second. he feels safe. he feels at home. but most of all, he knows he’s not alone and he has you - his family

kissing sanzu’s scars 🥺 everything you said was beautiful n i can totally see it happening !! as much as we all know sanzu takes great pleasure and finds entertainment in what he does, it sinks down a little too late. when he’s not high, that’s when he feels the lows. when the blood on his hands are dried, that’s when he realizes it gets harder to wash them off until it stains deep all the way into his soul. then his scars. he sees his scars and remembers how he has to hide them at some point. he stays awake at night and oddly enough, silent and unmoving. and what better way to ease his worries than to pull him close and just to kiss his scars that he thinks are only one of the ways the darkness - the ugliness - of his soul shows through. keep him close and kiss his scars. sanzu may not always be in the right mind to understand your words, but the simple gesture of showing love and acceptance to a part of him that makes him a whole will engrave deep into his heart. leave him butterfly kisses. kiss him from everywhere to his eyes until they flutter close to sleep. kiss his nose adoringly until they scrunch so cutely. kiss his lips until its your taste that overwhelms him. and kiss his scars to remind him his imperfections are accepted and loved

#asks with naoya's trophy wife #thot anon #ANON I LOVED THESE THANK U FOR SHARING ME UR THOTS 😭#I loved them all especially the kaku n sanzu one 🥺#i swear you guys keep making me soft for sanzu LMAOOO #👔 ― bonten! husbands exclusives #long post #unedited

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