wainwrightjakobshammerlock

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

got into borderlands worldbuilding discourse with a youtuber yesterday and he agreed with me and i am still riding that high ngl

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

Settles down on your dashboard gingerly and with a big heaving sigh

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

There is in fact not good explanations for any of this except that Monty liked spending a lot of time in his little cringe mancave cellar so he can avoid his son. But that's what headcanons are for

Been getting back into borderlands again recently and I never noticed how odd Jakobs Manor is. Like there's so many just. Weird things in there???

Like there's a bed just. Out in an open room with no doors. And a desk. Maybe im just not rich but thats weird. And there's like. Lowkey a cuck chair in the dining hall. WHY??? And why does Monty have a full kitchenette in his cellar office?? Like he can't even cook anything Good down there is he like making kraft mac and cheese what the fuck is going on in this house LMAO

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

Hi everyone sorry for not posting, it's just that I've descended into the Rimworld mod mines because the only Borderlands rimworld mod that exists is really out of date and kinda shit so now I'm trying to code in a goliath xenotype and some other things.

Anyways if anyone from the rimrim mod community can help: how do I make a gene that checks if a specific bodypart is uncovered and applies painOffset based on that

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

Who got comfortable farting in front of the other first? (Hammerlock)

first of all, if this was meant to be sent to the rp blog then you made an oopsie

second of all, wainwright. to me.

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

y'know what, sure. a broken-then-mended bone is the first sign of civilization after all

what would be the h. sapiens mamapost. let's use tools with mama? let's cook with mama? let's pray with mama?

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Borderlands (Video Games) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Sir Hammerlock/Wainwright Jakobs Characters: Sir Hammerlock (Borderlands), Wainwright Jakobs Additional Tags: Weapons, Jakobs Corporation (Borderlands), mild spoilers for bl4 gear i guess, Fluff, Explosions, Old Men Bara, Trans Sir Hammerlock, Trans Wainwright Jakobs, T4T Sir Hammerlock/Wainwright Jakobs, Autistic Sir Hammerlock, Autistic Wainwright Jakobs, Post-Borderlands 3 (Video Game), Sir Hammerlock has PTSD, Sir Hammerlock Has ADHD Summary:

In the fourth installment, they've expanded their product line into grenades, which take the form of throwing knives. Unlike other Ordnance, these have no splash radius, but can Critical Hit on headshots like guns.

- Borderlands: Jakobs on TvTropes

 In which Alistair is invited to a Jakobs testing range, and Wainwright gets kissed a bunch of times.

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

So. Since a while back, I've had the goal of making at least a few headcanons for each Borderlands corporation. Except that Tediore's been really tricky... until the new Rafa short dropped.

Thus: Nikolai's Tediore Headcanon.

TLDR; the people who started Tediore were such massive cheapskates they basically AI generated an entire corporation slash pyramid scheme (with an AI that's programmed to be cheap and is the real victim because it has the mind of a three year old that's also a gigantic supercomputer)

The CEO of Tediore, whoever it happens to be at the moment, is unbeknowst to many, more or less a figurehead. Sure, they make decisions, but far less than than in any other corporation.

The reason is that their decisions are made for them, by an AI called TEDIORE (yes, the corporation is named after it), or as it's colloquially known, the Taskmaster. Unlike later-gen AIs like Felicity or Balex, Taskmaster doesn't have humanlike intelligence; its smarts are comparable to a pig (which, FYI, still a really brainy animal), but it's just enough to allow it to make basic decisions.

Taskmaster was originally a generic efficiency-increasing AI, perhaps tasked with reducing resource costs of running human colonies on inhospitable worlds. Basically the protagonist of Universal Paperclips but w/o the hypnotizing the entire human race part. But some time before the Central Government's fall, a group of people took it and decided to utilize it in order to cash in on the "corporate craze", so to speak, without expending too much of their own capital. And so, Tediore was born.

Yes, Tediore started as a get-rich-quick scheme for a few individuals. That succeeded in a massive way.

Modern day Tediore has an R&D division, and logistics, and so on. But they are largely cosmetic, as most things are organized by Taskmaster relaying commands to humans, who then relay it down the hierarchy to people who think they're taking orders from an actual person. And their data is usually fed back to Taskmaster for processing.

This is why Tediore's upper management is... sparse, even for a highly stratified megacorp. There's however another reason: Tediore sort of runs like a pyramid scheme.

A promotion isn't something you can just get, unlike at Hyperion (where all you really need is good intrigue skills, connections and a weapon). There's a whole checklist of things you need to do to have a hope of advancing, like recruiting new people and completing various tasks. Oh, and you also have to pay a lot of money, because "we need to relocate your things" and a billion other excuses. Actually now that I think about it, this sounds more like Scientology than a pyramid scheme, but tomayto tomahto I guess

You may ask, if this is the case, why do people even work at Tediore?

If anyone in the Borderlands universe is the Debt Guys(tm) who run Fortuna-esque debt colonies, it's Tediore.

They make so many AIs they slap them in guns for fun. A big chunk of their workforce is most certainly automated, because that's cheaper than having to pay workers.

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

Moxxi is in Fortnite, you can get her right now if you pre-order Borderlands 4 on the Epic Games Store. Otherwise she will be in the Item Shop in September.

There is Maliwan, Jakobs and Torgue wraps that will be available too.

(No, you cannot pre order borderlands 4, then cancel it to get the moxxi bundle for free)

Source for sc: some guy on twitter that tried it, it's nearly 1am im not finding the source again-

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

"People have been telling stories about renewable energy since the nineteen-seventies, when the first all-solar-powered house opened on the campus of the University of Delaware, drawing a hundred thousand visitors in 1973, its first year, to marvel at its early photovoltaic panels and its solar hot-water system, complete with salt tubs in the basement to store heat overnight. But, even though we’ve got used to seeing solar panels and wind turbines across the landscape in the intervening fifty years, we continue to think of what they produce as “alternative energy,” a supplement to the fossil-fuelled power that has run Western economies for more than two centuries. In the past two years, however, with surprisingly little notice, renewable energy has suddenly become the obvious, mainstream, cost-efficient choice around the world. Against all the big bad things happening on the planet (and despite all the best efforts of the Republican-led Congress in recent weeks), this is a very big and hopeful thing, which a short catalogue of recent numbers demonstrates:

It took from the invention of the photovoltaic solar cell, in 1954, until 2022 for the world to install a terawatt of solar power; the second terawatt came just two years later [in 2024], and the third will arrive either later this year or early next [in 2025 or early 2026].

That’s because people are now putting up a gigawatt’s worth of solar panels, the rough equivalent of the power generated by one coal-fired plant, every fifteen hours. Solar power is now growing faster than any power source in history, and it is closely followed by wind power—which is really another form of energy from the sun, since it is differential heating of the earth that produces the wind that turns the turbines.

Last year, ninety-six per cent of the global demand for new electricity was met by renewables, and in the United States ninety-three per cent of new generating capacity came from solar, wind, and an ever-increasing variety of batteries to store that power.

In March, for the first time, fossil fuels generated less than half the electricity in the U.S. In California, at one point on May 25th, renewables were producing a record hundred and fifty-eight per cent of the state’s power demand. Over the course of the entire day, they produced eighty-two per cent of the power in California, which, this spring, surpassed Japan to become the world’s fourth-largest economy.

Meanwhile, battery-storage capability has increased seventy-six per cent, based on this year’s projected estimates; at night, those batteries are often the main supplier of California’s electricity. As the director of reliability analysis at the North American Electric Reliability Corporation put it, in the CleanTechnica newsletter, “batteries can smooth out some of that variability from those times when the wind isn’t blowing or the sun isn’t shining.” As a result, California is so far using forty per cent less natural gas to generate electricity than it did in 2023, which is the single most hopeful statistic I’ve seen in four decades of writing about the climate crisis.

Texas is now installing renewable energy and batteries faster than California; in a single week in March, it set records for solar and wind production as well as for battery discharge. In May, when the state was hit by a near-record-breaking early-season heat wave, air-conditioners helped create a record demand on the grid, which didn’t blink—more than a quarter of the power came from the sun and wind. Last week’s flooding tragedy was a reminder of how vulnerable the state is to extreme weather, especially as water temperatures rise in the Gulf, producing more moisture in the air; in late June, the director of the state’s utility system said that the chances of emergency outages had dropped from sixteen per cent last summer to less than one per cent this year, mostly because the state had added ten thousand megawatts of solar power and battery storage. That, he said, “puts us in a better position.”

All this is dwarfed by what’s happening in China, which currently installs more than half the world’s renewable energy and storage within its own borders, and exports most of the solar panels and batteries used by the rest of the world. In May, according to government records, China had installed a record ninety-three gigawatts of solar power—amounting to a gigawatt every eight hours. The pace was apparently paying off—analysts reported that, in the first quarter of the year, total carbon emissions in China had actually decreased; emissions linked to producing electricity fell nearly six per cent, as solar and wind have replaced coal. In 2024, almost half the automobiles sold in China, which is the world’s largest car market, were full or hybrid electric vehicles. And China’s prowess at producing cheap solar panels (and E.V.s) means that nations with which it has strong trading links—in Asia, Africa, South America—are seeing their own surge of renewable power.

In South America, for example, where a decade ago there were plans to build fifteen new coal-fired power plants, as of this spring there are none. There’s better news yet from India, now the world’s fastest-growing major economy and most populous nation, where data last month showed that from January through April a surge in solar production kept the country’s coal use flat and also cut the amount of natural gas used during the same period in 2024 by a quarter. But even countries far from Beijing are making quick shifts. Poland—long a leading coal-mining nation—saw renewable power outstrip coal for electric generation in May, thanks to a remarkable surge in solar construction. In 2021, the country set a goal for photovoltaic power usage by 2030; it has already tripled that goal.

Over the past fifteen years, the Chinese became so skilled at building batteries—first for cellphones, then cars, and now for entire electric systems—that the cost of energy storage has dropped ninety-five per cent. On July 7th, a round of bidding between battery companies to provide storage for Chinese utilities showed another thirty per cent drop in price. Grid-scale batteries have become so large that they can power whole cities for hours at a time; in 2025, the world will add eighty gigawatts of grid-scale storage, an eightfold increase from 2021. The U.S. alone put up four gigawatts of storage in the first half of 2024.

There are lots of other technologies vying to replace fossil fuels or to reduce climate damage: nuclear power, hydrogen power, carbon capture and storage; along with renewables, all were boosted by spending provisions in Biden’s Inflation Reduction Act and will be hampered to varying degrees by congressional rollbacks. Some may prove useful in the long run and others illusory, but for now they are statistically swamped by the sheer amount of renewable power coming online. Globally, roughly a third more power is being generated from the sun this spring than last. If this exponential rate of growth can continue, we will soon live in a very different world.

All this suggests that there is a chance for a deep reordering of the earth’s power systems, in every sense of the word “power,” offering a plausible check to not only the climate crisis but to autocracy. Instead of relying on scattered deposits of fossil fuel—the control of which has largely defined geopolitics for more than a century—we are moving rapidly toward a reliance on diffuse but ubiquitous sources of supply. The sun and the wind are available everywhere, and they complement each other well; when sunlight diminishes in the northern latitudes at the approach of winter, the winds pick up. This energy is impossible to hoard and difficult to fight wars over. If you’re interested in abundance, the sun beams tens of thousands of times more energy at the earth than we currently need. Paradigm shifts like this don’t come along often: the Industrial Revolution, the computer revolution. But, when they do, they change the world in profound and unpredictable ways...

In retrospect, it’s reasonably easy to see how fast solar and wind power were coming. But, blinkered by the status quo, almost no one actually predicted it. In 2009, the International Energy Agency predicted that we would hit two hundred and forty-four gigawatts of solar capacity by 2030; we hit it by 2015. For most of the past decade, the I.E.A.’s five-year forecasts missed [underestimated the amount of renewables] by an average of two hundred and thirty-five per cent. The only group that came even remotely close to getting it right was not J. P. Morgan Chase or Dow Jones or BlackRock. It was Greenpeace, which estimated in 2009 that we’d hit nine hundred and twenty-one total gigawatts by 2030. We were more than fifty per cent above that by 2023. Last summer, Jenny Chase, who has been tracking the economics of solar power for more than two decades for Bloomberg, told the Times, “If you’d told me nearly 20 years ago what would be the case now, 20 years later, I would have just said you were crazy. I would have laughed in your face. There is genuinely a revolution happening.”

-via The New Yorker, July 9, 2025

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

Chapter 49: The Train to Hell, Part One

Summary:

Warnings: None A rail-based adventure begins.

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

this blog's officially 7 years old today...

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

sci-fi jobs that must exist that i find inexplicably amusing:

space customs

tow trucks except they’re towing illegally parked spaceships

for that matter, spaceship thieves, if only for how much more effort i imagine that would take

irs agents who have to find tax evaders who went 2 or 3 galaxies over

literally everything about the concept of the space version of the dmv

imagine being the person who teaches hapless 16 year olds how to fly a spaceship

people who analyze Old Earth media for a living the same way people now analyze shakespeare or beowulf, aka a bunch of scholarly and serious academics writing papers arguing the true meaning of Mean Girls and Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure and A Very Potter Musical

cruise spaceships. you’re taking a slow tour of saturn’s rings and people are still complaining about you running out of cocktail sauce

feel free to add more

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

Guards !!! Bring in my Yuri That Makes No Sense !!! It's a NECESSITY

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

Finally gave JFV Aurelia an updated refsheet because her original one is [checks timestamp] two fucking years old, by Gythian that's even longer than I thought

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

Finally gave JFV Aurelia an updated refsheet because her original one is [checks timestamp] two fucking years old, by Gythian that's even longer than I thought

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

ahh i'm so happy my ask made you happy! since you mentioned character requests, i would love to see your vex or harlowe. can't wait to see what you draw either way!

of course! 🥺🫰 drew both of them because i couldnt decide hope u dont mind hehe thanks for waiting💞