#this choice is so odd to me

[leahthedreamer]

I’m sorry Jason being assigned a worlds spot is ridiculousssss

[foldingfittedsheets]

I’d like to be clear to new followers that I’m not vegan? My fish cruelty post has moved into vegetarian/vegan circles and I’m getting a bunch of new followers so I don’t want someone getting pissed later because I post about what I eat.

I grew up on a farm, I believe that humans are interconnected in the food chain with other plants and animals. I believe we have a duty to reduce any undue suffering and allow any animal in our care to thrive, but I also believe that to eat an animal you raised with care is part of the food chain and eating it without waste is respect.

These are my beliefs and choices and I’m not knocking anyone else’s, but I’d like for it not to become a hot button later.

[ruporas]

i killed. i murdered. i'm nothing like these sleepy people here… nevertheless, you can actually be grateful? bastard… i’m saying… thank you. because you spilled blood, you saved all of these people’s lives. i couldn’t have done it without you. (ID in alt)

[galacticlamps]

ok I have A Lot of thoughts about the staircase confession (well really about Edwin's whole character arc, but all roads lead to rome) but for now I just wanna say that, yes, I was bracing myself for something to go terribly wrong when I first watched it, and yes, part of me was initially worried its placement might be an uncharacteristically foolish choice made in the name of Drama or Pacing or Making a Compelling Episode of Television but at the expense of narrative sense--

But I wanna say that having taken all that into account, and watched it play out, and sat with it - and honestly become rather transfixed by it - I really think it's a beautifully crafted moment and truly the only way that arc could've arrived at such a satisfying conclusion.

And if I had to pinpoint why I not only buy it but also have come to really treasure it, I'd have to put it down to the fact that it genuinely is a confession, and nothing else.

That moment is an announcement of what Edwin has come to understand about himself, but because it takes the form of a character admitting romantic feelings for such a close friend, I think it can be very easy, when writing that kind of thing, to imbue it with other elements like a plea or a request or even the start of a new relationship that, intentionally or not, would change the shape of the moment and can quickly overshadow what a huge deal the telling is all on its own. But that's not the case here. Since it is only a confession, unaccompanied by anything else, and since we see afterward how it was enough, evidently, to fix the strangeness that had grown between him & Charles, we're forced to understand that it was never Edwin's feelings that were actually making things difficult for him - it was not being able to tell Charles about them. 'Terrified' as he's been of this, Edwin learns that his feelings don't need to either disappear completely or be totally reciprocated in order for him to be able to return to the peace, stability, and security of the relationship with which he defines his existence - and the scale of that relief a) tells us a hell of a lot about Edwin as a character and b) totally justifies the way his declaration just bursts out of him at what would otherwise be such a poorly chosen moment, in my opinion.

Whether or not they are or ever could be reciprocated, Edwin's feelings are definitively proven not to be the problem here - only his potential choice to bottle it up - his repression - is. And where that repression had once been mainly involuntary, a product of what he'd been through, now that he's got this new awareness of himself, if he still fails to admit what he's found either to himself or to the one person he's so unambiguously close with, then that repression will be by his own choice and actions.

And he won't do that. Among other things, he's coming into this scene having just (unknowingly) absolved the soul of his own school bully and accidental killer by pointing out a fact that is every bit as central to his self-discovery as anything about his sexuality or his attraction to Charles is: the idea that "If you punish yourself, everywhere becomes Hell"

So narratively speaking, of course it makes sense that Edwin literally cannot get out of Hell until he stops punishing himself - and right now, the thing that's torturing him is something he has control over. It's not who he is or what he feels, but what he chooses to do with those feelings that's hurting him, and he's even already made the conscious choice to tell Charles about them, he was just interrupted. But now that they're back together and he's literally in the middle of an attempt to escape Hell, there is absolutely no way he can so much as stop for breath without telling Charles the truth. Even the stopping for breath is so loaded - because they're ghosts, they don't need to breathe, but also they're in Hell, so the one thing they can feel is pain, however nonsensical. And Edwin certainly is in pain. But whether he knows what he's about to do or not when he says he 'just needs a tick,' a breather is absolutely not what's gonna give him enough relief to keep climbing - it's fixing that other hurt, though, that will.

Like everything else in that scene, there's a lot of layers to him promising Charles "You don't have to feel the same way, I just needed you to know" - but I don't think that means it isn't also true on a surface level. It's the act of telling Charles that matters so much more than whatever follows it, and while that might have gone unnoticed if anything else major had happened in the same conversation, now we're forced to acknowledge its staggering and singular importance for what it is. The moment is well-earned and properly built up to, but until we see it happen in all its wonderful simplicity, and we see the aftermath (or lack thereof, even), we couldn't properly anticipate how much of a weight off Edwin's shoulders merely getting to share the truth with Charles was going to be, why he couldn't wait for a better, safer opportunity before giving in to that desire, or how badly he needed to say it and nothing else - and I really, really love the weight that act of just being honest, seen, and known is given in their story/relationship.

[alphacrone]

the thing about nate ford is he’s unpleasant, unlikeable, and uninteresting. but his importance to the other core four, his relationships with them and the way he helps them grow, is SO GOOD.

[shalom-iamcominghome]

It's weird being simultaneously jewish and non-jewish at the exact same time. Because to non-jews, I am jewish. They see someone like me, and they don't typically care about the intricacies of jewish thought and law - they only see a jew, and they react accordingly. This isn't malicious on their end, I think, it's just a consequence of not being jewish or having people close to you who are. But to jews, they know that I'm not jewish yet, correctly so I may add, and I'm treated as such.

I'm not complaining about being treated as jewish or not being treated as jewish, but I'm saying it's a weird tug-of-war where I simultaneously am and am not. I don't compromise on where I am visibly associated with jews, and as a consequence, I'm treated as a jew for good and bad. I want that, though. Even when I have been terrified of being visibly associated with jews, I wouldn't abandon it.

[fairylando]

don't ask me why, but me and my friend were talking about how carlos is going to be free from fraudrrari in less than 20 days and we ended up comparing him to the virgin mary (i swear it will make sense and we both grew up in christian italian families as atheists) and... how her given festivities actually add up with some of his important dates ??? buckle up!

‧˚

⭒ "Festa dell'Assunzione di Maria" — august 15 she was raised to eternal life without bodily death, and very close to it carlos announced he signed with williams.

⭒ "La Natività della Beata Vergine Maria" — she was born on september 8th, he was born on september 1st (BOTH VIRGOS)!

⭒ "L'Immacolata Concezione" — december 8th, "from the first moment of her conception, the Blessed Virgin Mary was, by the singular grace and privilege of Almighty God, and in view of the merits of Jesus Christ, Savior of Mankind, kept free from all stain of original sin."... and what happens on december 8th? his last race in fraudrrari, exactly.

she was the lightly brushed by melancholy blue print after all!

[meirimerens]

do you simply email French colleges, and they take you in? no admission exams? no scores competition?

i mean i guess some people would prefer it go that way but can you imagine how much of an administrative bloodbath that would be?

in order to get into higher education in france you have multiple options. if you're going to specialized med, engineer, business, vet schools, you will need to pass an entrance exam. to do so, you might have to take a "prépa" [preparation] year, which is a bunch of privatel-run specialized classes which can run you some fucking moneyyyy and some students put themselves into debt over it. entrance exams are also done for most art school regardless of it private or public, such as the public one i was in for my first run of post-highshool education.

if you want to go to free public university like most (me included rn) do, in which you have a wider chance of getting into, you have to go through

which is the government online platform that regulates access to higher education. every french person who's had to use it (me included) will tell you it is the bane of our existence.

basically you have to put down your "wishes" for which branch in which uni you want to go. you have to add to them your grades of your baccalauréat [high school final exit exam] and to boost your chances a like. cover letter as to why you'd want to get in so so much. and then you WAIT. you wait for months that your submission be viewed by the professors (allegedly) of the uni you want to go to and they accept or deny you. multiple rounds of acceptation go around. once accepted into a uni, you can either accept it definitively or wait if another you you'd prefer also accepts you, with the knowledge you could be kicked off your first acceptation if someone accepts first if there are limited entrance spaces.

i know of plenty of people who were rejected from their first choice on parcoursup, and then had to fall back on a uni/class they were not that passionate about but still put in their wishes list because Parcoursup PUSHES you into high ed, even if you would have benefitted from a sabbatical, from getting a job, or from travelling. i always always say this. i can feel it in many of my classmates who were highschoolers last year, SO MANY of those people would have benefitted from getting a government grant to go travel across europe & chill for like a year. i know of plenty of people who were rejected from all of their wishes full stop because they didn't have good grades in high school. it's a goofy as fuck system which brings nothing but stress to high-school students who were (at my time) expected to study for the most important exam of their life so far alongside it (baccalauréat) [they might have changed the examination methods since i left like. 7 years ago man] and More Segregation in higher ed even if it was supposed to help with it.

even if you get into a branch with a very high acceptance rate (such as mine, who had like 90% acceptance iirc), there is a 30%-50% dropout rate for the first year only because it's so different than what you've done before.

tldr : do we wish email and no exams or score competition ? probably.

is it that way? goddess have mercy on us all No.

[mossterunderthebed]

[polar-bears-making-pancakes]

why Phil's go to face in photos is 😛 now

[hieropedia]

something thats always been on my mind about the eah destiny system is that a lot of the time i dont think the book actually needs to play a factor ... especially w regards to briar — sure she can opt out, can say No Thank you to the curse but i dont see how that stops anything ? the original sleeping beauty didnt consent to be cursed to sleep , we know the stories change and just have to keep the essense of the fairytale ? so whats actually stopping faybelle cursing her anyway . . . just trust ? hope ??

[michyeosseo]

I want to become stronger sooner to help Master wipe out the miasma from the Immortal Realm to free the people from oppression.

[gophergal]

TFTober 4 - Provision

[shouldprobablybereading]

I really do hope Gav ends up with Navani and Dalinar, because I’m not sure how he fits in with the ghostbloods stuff. And the thought of him being alone in there is horrifying. It would require a significantly more serious reaction than Lift going “oopsie now Navani and Dalinar will be mad and won’t let me have dessert”. Like if true they’d be rightfully fucking furious

[beaft]

hey it’s obviously not my business telling you how to live your life but i’m gonna suggest smth to u. as u mentioned BSL recently i’m gonna assume u live in the uk. i do too. i was on a two year wait list to get my autism diagnosis. i finally have it and it is a massive relief. i don’t know what the resources are like where you live, but if you can i would seriously recommend doing the preliminary screening thingies and getting put on a waitlist. being able to have actual medical justification for why i am Like This has made a big difference for me and i imagine it would be helpful for you too. sorry, im sure this stuff has like occurred to you before but yeah i just wanted to reach out

i actually did have a free autism assessment a while back, courtesy of my uni's support service, but it was... kind of a mess? everything was super rushed, they weren't clear on what was required, and the assessment mostly consisted of things like bringing out a picture of a cartoon smiley face and asking what emotion it was feeling, or getting me to read a kid's picture book and describe what was happening on each page. the assessor also spoke to me as if i was about four years old, which i didn't much appreciate as an adult human midway through a master's degree. in the end, she told me she thought it was more likely to be severe anxiety, and that i couldn't be autistic because i was "creative" and "found it easy to make friends". i found the whole thing very off-putting, which is partly why i have not tried to seek a diagnosis since.

nonetheless, thank you for the suggestion - i might look into it and see if i can get anywhere. i'm glad it helped you! i think it would help me too - i've just been put off by the long waitlists, not knowing exactly how to start the process, and the possibility that i might wait two years only to get the same result (not autistic, just weird).

[that-butch-archivist]

1 out of 4 accelerated summer courses finished today. Next to go is Chem.