#think its part why i like living in new zealand so much

[spacebarsidecar]

love love love when I get to think or talk about dinosaurs

[b14augrana]

Scrubber: Off-season

You go on vacation with all your teammates and the location is somewhere familiar to them

Barça Femení x teen!reader

Part of the Scrubber universe

pt. 2 masterlist

Warnings: none! just a long, cute fic 👼

A/N: scrubber content is back 💝 just a little filler / mini scrubber series while the next part to the actual series gets written slowly but surely. i’ll most likely write a part 2 if people want x

fridolinarolfo

→ Does anyone have vacation plans??!

ingrid_engen

→ no not yet 🫤

fridolinarolfo

→ Hellooooo where is everyone else

ingrid_engen

→ get active plz @/aitanabonmati @claudiaapina @/yourname @/alexiaputellas

Replied to fridolinarolfo

Does anyone have vacation plans??!

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ↳ anyways why did you ask about plans for the holiday? do you have any?

yourname

→ i dont have plans frido. omg do you wanna hang out??? 😋

patri8guijarro

→ I’m not doing anything

fridolinarolfo

Replied to yourname

i dont have plans frido. omg do you wanna h…

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ↳ I have an idea 🙂‍↕️ How about we all go on vacation together? We can all decide on a place

❤️ 8

ona.batlle

→ That sounds fun 😍 Nobody be boring and say no!!!!

yourname

→ ona’s right it does sound fun i wanna do it plz 🐒

alexiaputellas

→ Where will we go

ingrid_engen

→ hmm any ideas guys? 🥴

claudiaapina

→ Ibiza so we can party 🔥🔥

alexiaputellas

→ No not with bebita around

👎 1

yourname

→ guys my friend said we should go to new zealand. i think she is biased bc she is from there but it looks like a nice place 😄

fridolinarolfo

→ I really liked New Zealand actually

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ↳ I wish we stayed longer 🫠

ingrid_engen

Replied to fridolinarolfo

I really liked New Zealand actually

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ↳ same!! it was such a nice place and the people were really sweet

❤️ 6

patri8guijarro

→ We should go to New Zealand on vacation 🤩

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ↳ Me María and Clau didn’t go with you guys for the world cup so its our first time

yourname

Replied to patri8guijarro

Me María and Clau didn’t go with you guys f…

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ↳ i haven’t gone there either PLZZZZZ can we go guys pleaseeeeee 🙏🙏🤞

alexiaputellas

→ I liked it there so if everyone else wants to then yes I think we should go 🙌🏼

❤️ 9 🔥 4 🎉 2

patri8guijarro

→ Barça on tour already??? 🤣

❤️ 7 😂 5

“I’m so excited for our break!” you exclaimed, skipping over to Alexia. The team was warming down in the gym after a training session, and you had all spent the entire day talking about your plans to go on vacation in New Zealand.

“I’m excited too. It’ll be nice to actually enjoy New Zealand, because we didn’t get much time during the World Cup,” Alexia said, walking at a steady pace on the treadmill. You leaned on the handle, nodding at her words, “I can’t wait. It looks so awesome, and my friend said it is awesome.”

“Who’s your friend?” the woman asked, looking at you with a small smile as you responded. “I met her in the park a few weeks ago — her name’s Ludo. She told me that she was born in Italy but lives in New Zealand, and apparently she’s studying here, in Barcelona. How cool is that?”

Alexia raised her eyebrows, a surprised expression on her face, “Really cool, and she’s right, New Zealand is awesome. I liked Auckland a lot. There’s a tall skyscraper in the city that lights up at night. Se ve precioso.”

“Hey, maybe next time we can go to Australia for vacation. Laia must have some friends at Arsenal that can give us some advice on where to go,” she added. Australia was another place you thought was beautiful. The beaches looked so… beach-y. They looked like the type of beaches you imagine when you hear the word ‘beach’, but Barcelona beaches weren’t too far off either in your humble beach-lover opinion.

"Are you two talking about the holidays?" It was Ingrid asking now, and she emerged from the other side of Alexia. You nodded, a smile on your face. "Yeah. I can't wait, it's literally all I've been thinking about, I'm so excited! I want to go to the beach and the city– Patri! Clau!" you yelled, beckoning to the women across the room, "We should go bungee jumping!"

Patri's face lit up. "I'll do anything that gives Ale a heart attack," she jeered, nudging Alexia gently as she stepped off the treadmill and wiped her forehead with a towel. "Cállate, tonto," Alexia laughed.

“I’m excited to try their coffee. I hope they’ve got a good coffee culture,” Ingrid said, earning a hum of agreement from Fridolina, another café enthusiast.

There were so many things to do, you couldn't keep up. When you and Irene got home, you immediately dashed to your room and flopped onto your bed with your notebook and laptop open, searching up and scribbling down a list of activities for you guys to do during your time in New Zealand. It ranged from bowling at an arcade to dining in a restaurant situated at the top of a skyscraper, so the options were endless.

Honestly, you were just happy to be going on holiday with your teammates. The destination didn’t matter.

Mateo stumbled into your room with his stuffed moose, Bombón, and climbed onto your bed, sitting politely beside you with his moose in his lap.

“Teo, me and Mami are going on holiday, so you and Bombón will be with Madre for a little bit,” you explained, earning a little nod from Mateo who pointed at your laptop screen.

“Es aquí donde vas?” he questioned, motioning to the photos on the website you had open. “Sí. Bonita, verdad?” Mateo smiled and replied with a little ‘Sí.’

“Nenita,” Irene yelled from the living room. You peered out of your bedroom as she spoke, “Can you text Fridolina and ask her how we’re booking the flight tickets?”

You nodded and retreated into your bedroom again, picking up your phone and opening iMessage.

yourname

→ @/fridolinarolfo how are we booking the tickets frido??

fridolinarolfo

→ 😅😅

patri8guijarro

→ Let’s take the Barça plane 🤣🤣

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ↳ It’s there for a reason lol

claudiaapina

→ Barça plane or I’m not going 💯

fridolinarolfo

→ 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ↳ I’ll ask Jona then

“Irene, Frido’s gonna ask Jona if we can take the big plane!” you said. She didn’t respond for a minute, but then she appeared at your bedroom door. “The Barça plane? The one with our faces on the side?”

You nodded once more, and Irene let out a laugh as she shook her head. “Claudia’s idea, or Patri’s?” she asked. “Patri’s, but Claudia did say that she’s not going if we don’t take that plane,” you giggled, showing her the texts on your phone. Two tiny hands grabbed ahold of you as Mateo braced on your arm and took a peek at your phone screen.

The next day, Alexia picked you up to take you to training while Irene dropped Mateo off at preschool. It was one of the last training days before the season ended, so there were some bittersweet feelings surrounding the next few days.

"I love being at work and I'm a bit sad because this season has been so good, a holiday only means it's finished,” Aitana said while you two sat down and used the foam rollers beneath your legs, “But pequeñita, the last time I went to New Zealand, all I wanted to do was win the World Cup, so I didn't do anything around the city because we weren't there for a holiday. Now that we have won it, I want to do as much as we can!”

Fridolina burst through the doors of the gym with a big smile on her face, her gym bag slung over her shoulder. “I just asked Jona about taking the Barça plane and…”

Everyone looked at her eagerly, waiting for the verdict.

“It’s a yes... but we have to pay for our own tickets since it isn’t for work.”

Claudia was the first to jump up and celebrate, followed by Patri and then everyone else. The tickets part didn’t matter, because you all got to sit together anyways.

“We’re going to New Zealand!”

After your training session, you all sat in a circle to do some stretches. The stretches part happened for maybe a minute, before you pulled a folded piece of paper out of your pocket and laid it out flat on the grass in front of you all. "I wrote down a bunch of things we can do in New Zealand. There's something for everyone, so don't worry about missing out on any cafés, Ingrid," you jeered.

Patri grabbed the paper and scanned it, a smile quickly appearing on her face. She passed it down to Claudia, and the paper made its way around the circle before ending up in the middle again.

"I want to have dinner at the skyscraper restaurant," Alexia said, her eyes lighting up as she spoke about it. A few people hummed in agreement, including you.

Claudia scoffed and shook her head, "The first thing we're doing is going to the theme park. Look forward to dinner at dinnertime!"

"You look forward to dinner at breakfast time."

"Okay, shut up Mapi."

"What about the trampoline park? You guys are totally ignoring the trampoline park!" Patri exclaimed, flailing her hands in the air. Alexia laughed and leaned back on her arms, "Yeah, because a group of grown women are allowed to be in a trampoline park with little kids. We'll crush them!"

"Not if we rent the whole place out," Patri winked, making Alexia raise her eyebrow. "Imagine that! A trampoline park, all to ourselves."

Alexia shook her head, laughing once more, "That wouldn't be too bad. At least you three could be clowns and not hurt anyone's kid," she remarked, motioning to you, Patri, and Pina, all of which made faces at her.

"It would be way cooler to hire the theme park for the night. No lines, unlimited turns, and we wouldn't need to wait forever for food," Claudia responded.

"We should go to the beach!" Ingrid chimed, pointing at the sheet of paper. That was something everyone could agree on; a nice day at the beach, soaking up the sun. There was nothing quite like the Barcelona sun, but you could at least see if the New Zealand sun came close to comparing.

“(Y/N), come on!” Alexia yelled from the living room, rolling her suitcase along the floor. You groaned, currently in the middle of trying to zip your own luggage up. “I’m almost done!”

You sat on top of your suitcase, desperately trying to push it down, and eventually, you finally managed. With a sigh of relief, you quickly zipped it up with one hand while the other kept pushing it. Alexia appeared at your door, sticking her head through the gap, “Have you got it, Chiquita?” You nodded, heaving the suitcase off your bed and onto the floor with a thud as you smiled proudly. “All done!”

"I logged into Hay Day for you, because I knew you'd be busy and forget," Alexia added, a smile of her own now gracing her features as yours simply widened. "Graciés, Ale!" you exclaimed, wheeling your suitcase forward. You stopped at the door as Alexia pulled you into a hug and placed a quick kiss to your forehead.

"Are we forgetting anything?" she asked, walking with you to the living room, and you thought about it for a moment before shaking your head with an unsure expression, "I don't think so..."

“Wait!”

You ran back into your room quickly, skidding around the corner. Alexia could hear you rummaging around for something and mumbling, ‘Where is it’ and, ‘Mierda’ before you emerged from the room empty handed. She looked down at your feet and laughed when she saw the navy blue house slippers on your feet, paired with the Barça socks you were already wearing.

“Don’t laugh, you don’t understand how nice they are,” you grumbled, brushing her off as she laughed even harder.

The pair of you walked out of Alexia’s apartment with your suitcases in hand, and you took the elevator down to the car park. There was a brief silence in the elevator for a moment, but the urge got the best of you and you began making faces at Alexia in the mirror.

You returned to a normal expression when she suddenly looked at you with her eyebrow raised, and you glanced back at her like she was crazy for being suspicious of you. Once she turned back around, you continued making stupid faces in the mirror while she wasn't looking.

The antics didn't stop when she eventually caught you; instead, Alexia joined in, poking her tongue out at you in the mirror until you both were going back and forth making silly faces at each other for the rest of the elevator ride. Soon, the empty car park was filled with the sound of laughter as the pair of you exited the elevator, stumbling over your own two feet from laughing too hard while you walked to her car.

She unlocked the car and you both hauled your suitcases into the trunk with a grunt. "Dios mío, it wasn't this heavy before..." Alexia mumbled, pulling the trunk lid down before strolling to the driver's side.

You nodded in agreement, letting out a slightly exasperated sigh as you sunk into the passenger seat.

"I can't wait until I can drive," you remarked, buckling your seatbelt. "When that happens, you owe me about... 1,000 car rides," Alexia teased, buckling her own seatbelt as she glanced at you with a small smile. You rolled your eyes, seemingly annoyed at her words, but the smile on your own face told other tales.

You wound down the window a bit, filling the car with fresh air as you emerged out of the car park and traversed the streets of Barcelona. "Are we picking anyone else up?" you inquired, and she shook her head.

"We were going to pick up Irene, but Lucia said she'd drop her off at the airport," Alexia responded, and you acknowledged her words with a little 'oh'.

"Want anything to eat, Chiquita?" Alexia asked, glancing at you for a sliver of a second. You contemplated her question carefully, hesitating every time you thought you had an answer, until eventually you came up with a nod of your head. "I'm craving an almond croissant, you know the ones?"

The blonde nodded her head, knowing exactly what you meant. It only took a few turns before Alexia pulled over in front of your favourite pastry bakery. "Vale, I'll be 2 minutes," she notified, opening her car door and shutting it behind her as she headed for the entrance of the bakery.

Shortly after, she returned with a brown paper bag in hand and a smile on her face. Opening the car door once again and sitting down in her seat, she handed you the bag. Immediately, the sweet aroma of a fresh-out-the-oven, icing sugar-dusted, almond-garnished croissant graced your nostrils. "Graciés, hermana," you thanked her, a smile akin to hers on your face.

"Want a bite?" you asked, offering the warm pastry to her as she merged back onto the main road. She took a little nibble, mumbling a thanks in between her bite. As soon as she straightened herself up, you brought your croissant back to your mouth and took a massive bite, savouring every moment spent with icing sugar on your face. ‘It adds to the experience,’ you thought.

The last bites were consumed at an agonisingly slow pace. You wanted to savour the almond-y goodness, but you also wanted to wolf it down and quit stalling — you were conflicted. Would New Zealand have such nice almond croissants? Probably not, but you’d never know unless you tried!

The prospect of more almond croissants in New Zealand got you through the last few bites without having to mourn the pastry, and before you knew it, the airport was coming into sight.

Travelling wasn’t a new concept for you; in fact, you had lived abroad in France before. You couldn’t say why, but you did for two years (give or take a few months), and some would call it a miracle that Lyon didn’t pick you up before Barcelona did.

You hated living in France anyways. It was pastry heaven, of course, but it was not Vidić lover heaven. They were all about Zidane and Henry, not a single word about Vidić. It was understandable, but still, not cool.

Also, the amount of pigeons freaked you out.

Your phone buzzed in your pocket, and you pulled it out, already knowing who it was. Alexia’s buzzed too, but as she rummaged around for it, you had already opened the message, so she just looked at your screen.

claudiaapina

→ Where are you all

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ↳ Deja de ser perezosa hermanas 🙄

patri8guijarro

→ Don’t listen to her we just got here because someone @/claudiaapina wanted to stop and pet someone’s dog 🖕🏻🖕🏻

claudiaapina

Replied to patri8guijarro

Don’t listen to her we just got here because s…

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ↳ Cállate cerdita

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ 💩 1

fridolinarolfo

→ I’m here with Aitana we’re just getting a bite

yourname

→ me and ale just got here 😆

lucybronze

→ I’m with Ona in the lounge 🥴

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ↳ I saw Marta dragging Caro to the duty free though 🤣🤣

graham95

→ Be quiet Lucy I saw you kicking a vending machine earlier 😒

ingrid_engen

→ im here with maría now

yourname

→ i see irene 🥳🥳🥳🥳

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ↳ bye guys me and ale will see you inside 🥸

You switched your phone off, shoving it back into your pocket as Alexia spoke with a smile. “This is going to be a fun trip.”

You nodded, your face contorting into a smile of your own as you unbuckled your seatbelt. “Let’s grab our stuff and go to Irene,” you said eagerly, jumping out of the car and rushing to the trunk, pushing up the lid so you could lift your suitcase out slowly.

You wheeled it around the side of Alexia’s car before abandoning it and breaking into a sprint towards Irene, but you were actually heading for Mateo who was toddling along behind her. You swooped him into your arms, and Irene bore an affectionate smile as she watched you carry him.

“Pequeño, I’m gonna miss you!” you said, placing the toddler back down. He latched onto your leg, hugging it tightly, and you ruffled his hair. “I’ll bring you back a friend for Bombón, I promise,” you added, giving Mateo one last hug before picking him up once more and handing him to Lucia. Irene gave the two one last hug goodbye, and then put an arm around your shoulder while her other one held the handle of her suitcase.

Alexia wheeled your luggage back over to you, and held her own in her other hand. “Ready to go?” she asked you and Irene, who both nodded.

“Let’s go!”

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

[unofficial-book-of-quotes-tm]

Taskmaster New Zealand series 1 summary

So, I finally caved and decided to expand to Taskmaster NZ and I have to say, I like it a lot, which I didn’t exactly expect, to be honest. I know a lot of people like TM NZ and have been recommending it to me non-stop, so yeah. It’s genuinely brilliant. Paul Williams and Jeremy Wells are great choices in my opinion for the assistant and the Taskmaster. They aren’t at all like Greg and Alex which I find quite refreshing. Don’t get me wrong, I adore Greg’s and Alex’s dynamic and it’s a huge part of why I adore TM UK so much, but I’m glad they didn’t try and replicate it. Jeremy is a lot quieter, more lenient and nicer when scoring the contestants, and whereas Greg has rarely a nice word to say about Alex, Jeremy basically showers Paul in praise. It’s so different, yet I think that’s why it works so well. I’m a BritCom kind of guy through and through, so I don’t know any of the NZ contestants, but everyone won me over so fucking fast. The first series is always difficult, and TM UK was already an established show when TM NZ got its first series, but I think they pretty much nailed it. The first series of TM UK holds a special place in my heart, but TM NZ slots in so easily alongside it. I expected some awkwardness, and especially Jeremy seems to struggle a little to find his footing in the early episodes but I don’t mind. I also think the Taskmaster Ranch is a nice location and so much bigger than the Taskmaster House, allowing more variety in scenery even when they’re just in one location, and I really think they nailed the tasks too. As far as I’m aware, Alex writes the tasks for TM UK himself and it’s just him who does it whereas for TM NZ they have a team creating them and it’s somewhat noticeable on occasions, but I don’t mind either way. I don’t have anything negative to say about the first series. Sure, there were things they could have done better, but who cares? I was also quite lenient about TM UK’s first series and I think they’re both highly entertaining, which should be the main point, right? The cast is also just really wholesome and I appreciate that when showing the VTs, the editors don’t just stay on the VT but intercut it with the reactions from the cast and you can also hear their reactions throughout the VT, something I miss in TM UK (I know they did it in earlier series, but why they stopped I don’t know (I mean, Tim Key’s reaction to Romesh smashing the watermelon on the ground lives in my head rent free)). Jeremy’s scoring feels sometimes even more arbitrary than Greg’s and introducing half-points in the first series could have gotten messy, but it didn’t. And I like his use of bonus points. As I know none of the cast, I basically couldn’t give less of a fuck about who won, so, yeah, I’m down with Jeremy’s scoring. As a side note: A funny thing I noticed was in episode 4 and 5, there was a guy in the audience who really, and I mean really, enjoyed himself. He was there to cheer and cheer he did. Good for him.

I love Angella Dravid. She’s so awkward and anxious but she has some prime responses / one-liners. She and Guy are the contestants I thought were funniest and she seems to be a genuinely sweet person, the way she interacted with Paul and the other cast. I thought about comparing her to Joe Thomas, but they’re on opposite ends of a spectrum for me in terms of awkwardness. I think she might be my favourite contestant overall (at least at this point in time).

I don’t know if this is a controversial opinion or not, but I think Guy Williams is a better Iain Stirling, as in, Guy did annoy me slightly, but he was also genuinely hilarious to the point where he managed to combine these things perfectly, and he was a joy to behold, especially him and Paul bouncing off of each other. You really do feel the sibling dynamic there.

I don’t know enough about Leigh Hart to conclusively determine whether he was just being nice when he offered Paul a drink anytime he was leaving to get stuff or if this is a joke I don’t get. I think I laughed each time he hit his head on the shed’s ceiling (and I feel kind of bad for laughing). Also, I loved Leigh’s feud with the blender and mixer. He seems to be one of those inoffensive white guys every iteration of Taskmaster has had at some point, so yeah, quite competent without doing anything too memorable — although that cheese sandwich looked fucking delicious, admittedly.

Watching Brynley Stent attempting most tasks was like watching an overexcited puppy, peaking in episode 7 with her crawl whilst carrying the frisbee in her mouth. I got to say, VT Brynley and studio Brynley are two entirely different people for me, like, how are they the same person? My brain can’t compute that at all. I did enjoy watching her, even though some of her ideas felt a little unhinged, overall she had a rather innocent brand of comedy about her. I liked that.

Madeleine Sami looked quite handsome in her suit, didn’t she? As I loved Leigh’s feud with the blender, I also adore Madeleine’s love story with the leaf blower. I don’t have much to say about her otherwise. Madeleine was very average, in my opinion, despite coming second with a massive lead over third place, I don’t remember much of what she did, although I have since gone on to watch Deadloch, specifically because Madeleine Sami is in it.

And I think it’s wild to have that many musically talented people in one cast. Anyway, that was TM NZ series 1. I’m not going to follow this up with series 2 immediately and put my focus back on TM UK for the time being, although series 2 and 3 were hilarious as well. But yeah, I’ll figure out a way to change it up a little every now and then. Thanks for sticking around!

[tloaak]

@endless-demon thank you so much for asking! it's a little complicated but I think simplification does a disservice to the issue and is exactly what people like David Seymour rely on to spread lies about historical context and current consequences. I'm putting this in a reblog because it's long, and I'm putting it on this post because I'd rather this video be the one to get seen. as always I'm pakeha and also not an expert, so I'm very open to corrections on details but im confident of the broad strokes.

so when the English first arrived to build settlements in aotearoa, they formed a treaty with Māori (te Tiriti o Waitangi), the people already living there, that the English can govern their own settlements, as long as they allowed for continued māori sovereignty (tino rangatiratanga). there exist two versions of the text, English and te reo Māori, which do not perfectly match. after this, the English settlers began acquiring massive swathes of land by legally questionable means, and asserting absolute sovereignty over these areas. these culminated in the land wars, which then lead to massive land confiscation as a form of both political punishment and colonization. the end result is that now the crown own nearly all land in aotearoa and claim absolute sovereignty over it.

now, the Māori text does not claim sovereignty over the property that the crown recognizes Māori own. the text promises, among other things, self determination for Māori, which is essentially impossible under a westminster system of government because they are currently a demographic minority. it's only very recent in our history that the crown has acknowledged the legitimacy of the te reo Māori text, and even more recently that we began to actually implement any of its principles. one of the biggest ways the treaty is used in modern day is to guarantee Māori have an opportunity at the table for major national decisions (particular those of environmental significance), and to defer organizational power for Māori issues to Māori communities.

the treaty principles bill seeks to water down these promises by allowing these rights to all new zealanders, "democratising" the treaty and removing those guarantees that have been so hard fought for by Māori. but, more importantly, it seeks to seed division and racism within this country to gather more support for the ACT party who are sponsoring this bill.

this bill was part of the coalition agreement by our current 3 party right wing government. the national party agreed to sponsor this bill to first reading (allowing public submission on the bill) but no further. I personally believe, along with many others, that when the time comes to vote for the second reading the act party will threaten to pull out of the coalition if the bill is not passed again, and our prime minister will not have the strength of character to stand up to his deputy. regardless, the relationship between the crown and Māori has already been damaged, both by the simple introduction of the bill as well as all the changes our current government has implemented.

as Paul Goldsmith, Minister for Treaty Negotiations outlined in his speech during the bill, the National party believe that te Tiriti must be killed, not in a single action, but by a thousand cuts, like the removal of references to the treaty from our legislation and curriculums, and the disestablishment of agencies like the Māori Health Authority, cuts to Māori advisors to govt departments, removing māori seats from local government, etc.

there's so much more to this issue, like the centuries of abuse and mistreatment of Māori by the crown authorities, how this abuse is ongoing to Māori children and adults today in state care, how iwi voices are our last line of defence against environmental and ecological damage by industry, the unilateral natural of the treaty reparation settlement process... but this is why this protest was staged in parliament today.

(in fact, there is a much larger protest taking place nationwide, scheduled to arrive the day the bill was supposed to be introduced. the bill was in fact introduced a week earlier, in a move many suspect was done to prevent exactly this kind of protest.)

as far as I'm concerned though? I think te pāti Māori achieved exactly what they wanted by this protest. they forced the government to drop the mask of civility, and force the protestors out of the building. and they showed their supporters that their protests are working - they felt threatened enough by this that they lashed out, felt a need to retaliate by suspending hana-rawhiti maipi-clarke from the house for 24 hours. the coalition are getting nervous

much better footage of the haka that shut down parliament today

[ashadowofburnedoutstardust]

To answer your questions about America

1. Yes we have reusable bags but we still use plastic unfortunately. A lot of places charge for them and a lot are switching to recycled plastic (at least in California idk about the rest of the country)

2. Ambulances are expensive and so is health care 🫠 we all know this

3. Yes we have banking apps, but Venmo is safer and protects your info like PayPal. It connects to your bank and pulls money from there unless you have the credit card

4. If you get heated towel racks you’re bougie as hell over here (again in California idk the rest of the country) I wish I had one

5. If you get your eggs locally you don’t have to put them in the fridge, I keep them there out of habit, but I do think most eggs sold should be refrigerated? Idk why

6. As kids applesauce was an easy snack, I don’t know many adults who eat applesauce on its own, but maybe they do 🤷🏼‍♀️

I have to be honest these questions came from a tiktok and with things that an American living in New Zealand will pointing out that just kind of blew my mind a little

Like we used to collect the plastic bags in one of those like bag bags when I was little but I literally have not seen a plastic bag and over a decade, so to be reminded that they still exist kind of just broke my brain because I'm so used to the sewn hessian ones or the foldable ones that we keep in our handbags

I know I've talked before about my arm being hurt, but after several doctors appointments and x-rays and physio appointments I'm still yet to spend more than $200 on the total and you guys should absolutely be rioting for better Health care because you can best believe the rest of the world will back you on that one

We have epically secure banking apps, but we literally do not have any version of cash apps in this country. PayPal is something that we use to protect ourselves on foreign websites

The only time I've used my debit card in the last couple of years was actually via PayPal and the information ended up getting stolen and the banks stopped the transfer immediately before it even happened and notified me and I was able to block my card on the app because the transaction they were using it to make was suspicious, they sent me a text in order to have the transaction approved, which I have to do for pretty much all foreign purchases

Heated towel racks in this country are typically like a lower middle class and up kind of thing, but you will find them in rental houses as well, and they are pretty standard in houses that were built after 2000

The lady in the tik tok said that you guys sanitize and wash your eggs in a process that removes part of the protective coating on them, whereas we don't do that so we don't necessarily need to refrigerate them. I do personally put them in the fridge but that's because I don't have room for them in the cupboard, and they do sell them straight on the normal shelves at the supermarket

I've never eaten apple sauce in my life, but that's only because I hate pork, unless it's crackle, do you guys call it crackle? The crunchy roasted skin bits? You can buy those here like a packet of chips

[lady-wildflower]

So, I'm not USAmerican. I'm a random kiwi, ie I'm from Aotearoa New Zealand. But USAmerican politics affect the world, and so against our will one must pay attention to it. Your election will decide the stability of huge parts of the world and the lives of a lot of people.

Right now, your election hasn't been called. People are talking about a red mirage leading to a blue resurgence, and gods I hope that happens, for the sake of the people of the States and the entire world. But even if it does, this being the map of your results at 8:15pm NZDT, is absurd.

This sort of thing is why I've always been bemused and frowny whenever your (barely) progressive figures insist of Donald Trump's behaviour "this is not America," or the like. It's something that seriously bothers me about USAmerican politics.

Sorry, but yes it is. It's been patently obvious from an outside viewpoint for a very long time that the United States are not a beacon of progressiveness like some of your leaders would like to think. The United States are a haven of bigotry, prejudice, and mean-spiritedness. At this point, sixty-eight million USAmericans would rather vote for a convicted criminal, liable sex pest, and traitor who entered politics by promoting racist conspiracy theories than a politically qualified and basically progressive prosecutor who is also a black woman.

In the United States, bigoted, sexist, vindictive, small-minded violent fascism is so far leading against the most mild of progressive leaders. It has a real likelihood of winning.

Oh, and while I've been writing this the AP just called Pennsylvania for Trump. So now that picture above is already out of date, now Trump would seem to have 267 Electoral College votes.

Even if Kamala wins thanks to the last minute wave of Democratic votes in slower-counted population centres, this is how close your politics are. This is how much the United States can teeter. USAmerica as a whole needs to stop sticking its head in the sands and reckon with the fact that a vast amount of its population is either unbothered by, or outright supportive of, fascism, treason, vile sexism, white supremacy, rape culture, violent racism, and authoritarianism.

The United States on the whole are not better than this. Stop blithely pretending they are. It's days like this that make clear how nauseatingly self-deceiving statements like 'this is not America' are. You guys have a long way before saying that is anything but dangerous ignorance of the reality of how far you have left to go.

[xtruss]

‘It Felt Like Bad News After Bad News’: Why Record Numbers Are Leaving New Zealand

Many young people are lured by hopes of better opportunities in Australia as experts worry a soft economy means departing Kiwis may not come back

— Pete McKenzie in Wellington, New Zealand | Thursday 20 June 2024

Auckland, New Zealand’s Largest City. Record numbers of people are leaving the country amid cost-of-living pressures, with more than half of the recent departures heading to Australia. Photograph: Xinhua/Rex/Shutterstock

When New Zealand opened its borders after the pandemic, the departures began immediately. For Kirsty Frame, then a 24-year-old journalist for the country’s national broadcaster in Wellington, the sense of loss was constant.

“It was goodbye dinner after goodbye dinner, leaving drinks after leaving drinks, and I think that started to take a toll.”

For her, the city’s beauty came from its people. “If what made Wellington so great as a place to live and work was my community, and I feel I don’t have that here now and there’s a lot less people my age, what do I want to do?”

She considered moving to Auckland, New Zealand’s largest city, but heard it felt empty too. She mulled London, but Britain seemed too distant. Finally, in the middle of 2023, she moved to Melbourne.

The flow of departures from New Zealand has accelerated since then. Now, record numbers of people are leaving the country as cost-of-living pressures increase and residents grapple with limited job opportunities. Provisional figures from Statistics NZ show a net loss of 56,500 citizens in the year to April – up 12,000 from the previous record.

New Zealander Kirsty Frame moved to Melbourne where she found a higher-paying job and a flat with lower rent. Photograph: Penny Stephens/The Guardian

Separate figures indicated that half of those who left New Zealand recently moved to Australia. Now, experts are worrying that a grim economic picture means departing Kiwis may not come back.

“We can’t compete with the salaries in Australia,” says David Cooper, director of immigration firm Malcolm Pacific. “Some people view that New Zealand has gone backwards, and so they’re voting with their feet.”

Frame says it “just felt like bad news after bad news” in New Zealand, and in Melbourne she found a higher-paying job in communications and a flat with lower rent.

“I could be happy here for a long time. I think I will be here for the long run.”

‘Grass Looks A Lot Greener’ In Australia

New Zealand has a tradition of young residents travelling for an overseas experience. According to Gareth Kiernan, chief forecaster at economics consultancy Infometrics, part of the reason the recent surge hit record levels is a backlog of people travelling abroad after delaying their plans due to travel restrictions and uncertainty amid the pandemic.

Among them is Joshua Scott, who weathered the pandemic in Wellington, then decided to move to the UK. The prospect of European adventures and a larger city beckoned, and the 29-year-old settled in east London last year, and found a job in healthcare.

The shift was made easier by the number of New Zealanders making a similar move. “I haven’t really made new friends here, beyond getting to people that I sort of knew from Wellington,” he says.

Shoppers in Sydney. Photograph: Steven Saphore/AAP

But much of the record flow out of New Zealand, according to Cooper and Kiernan, is also due to the growing attraction of Australia. As New Zealand inches out a recent recession, many citizens have a perception that the cost of living is lower and salaries higher in Australia, says Keirnan, which might lead to more permanent shifts.

“It’s all very heavily in favour of people getting across the Tasman, because the grass looks a lot greener,” he says.

Emily Partridge is one of those who recently left New Zealand in search of opportunity. The 26-year-old, who grew up in Dunedin, made a professional calculation when the clothing company she worked for was sold to new owners.

“I was working in a relatively small industry in a small country,” she says. “Looking into the future five or 10 years, I’d think: I’m not sure how much growth there is down the line.”

She decided earlier this year to move to Sydney, where she works for a perfume brand.

Maia Vieregg, a 26-year-old geologist, doesn’t expect to return to New Zealand any time soon

“In New Zealand, you could either work for a cool company and get paid quite poorly, or you could work a job that’s less exciting but pays well. In Australia, because the economy is better, I can do both of those things.”

Fears New Zealanders Won’t Return

Maia Vieregg, a 26-year-old geologist, graduated university last year and struggled to find work in Wellington or elsewhere in the country. And when several conservative parties displaced New Zealand’s former progressive government at the last election, she felt “cynical and hopeless” about New Zealand’s future.

She had never planned to go overseas, but the combination pushed her to consider new options. In January, Vieregg moved to Newcastle – a couple of hours’ north of Sydney – where she found a job with a mining company that paid much better than anything she had seen at home. She has found Australia difficult to adjust to.

“New Zealand is a quite down-to-earth place,” she says, compared with Australia’s materialism. She plans to eventually return home – but does not expect that to happen any time soon.

Cooper worries that outflow might worsen an already severe skills shortage in the country.

“The record numbers of Kiwis leaving are not the desperate and dateless. They’re the young, skilled people,” he says.

“These are people who are well qualified, with good skills. It’s hard to attract the highly skilled people we need to replace the ones leaving.”

Kiernan agrees. “If we’re not able to keep people here because the economy isn’t going well and the cost of living is too high, it does reflect pretty poorly on our economic situation.”

For many of the young travellers, the pull of having children will probably be the driver to bring them home. Partridge does not expect to return to New Zealand unless she decides to have children, while Scott will also head back when he’s ready to start a family.

New Zealander Kirsty Frame moved to Melbourne about 12 months ago for financial reasons. Photograph: Penny Stephens/The Guardian

Frame, meanwhile, says: “What might bring me back is that feeling of missing my family, or a new chapter of my life starting. Or just feeling homesick for the country and the smallness of it.”

In the meantime, she does not even need to return to New Zealand to get a taste of home.

“There’s so many New Zealanders here, it’s kind of ridiculous,” Frame says. “Bumping into people from Wellington here is almost an everyday event.”

In recent years, New Zealanders – particularly young professionals and graduates – reported leaving the country due to high living costs and job shortages. Photograph: Saeed Khan/AFP/Getty Images.

Record Number of People Leave New Zealand Amid Cost of Living Pressures

More than half those who left recently headed to Australia with promises of higher pay and better working conditions

— Eva Corlett in Wellington, New Zealand | Tuesday 11 June 2024

New Zealand Citizens are leaving the country in record numbers, with large numbers heading to Australia, new figures show.

Stats NZ’s provisional international migration data shows there were an estimated 130,600 migrant departures in the year to April – the highest on record for an annual period.

Of those leaving the country on a long-term basis, an estimated 81,200 were New Zealand citizens – a 41% increase on the previous year. The figure is a rise from the previous record of 72,400 departures in 2012.

With 24,800 New Zealand citizens arriving during the period, that put the net migration loss of citizens at 56,500 – exceeding the previous record of 44,400 in 2012.

Overall, there was annual net migration gain of 98,500 as 154,900 non-New Zealand citizens entered the country. Migrant arrivals from India were the largest group, followed by the Philippines and China.

On Wednesday, Stats NZ also released provisional data on migration with Australia. It showed in the year to September 2023, 53% of New Zealand citizen departures were to Australia.

In recent years, New Zealanders – particularly young professionals and graduates -reported leaving the country due to high living costs and ongoing job shortages. It is also considered a rite of passage for many young New Zealanders to head overseas once they finish school or higher education.

Stats NZ does not gather specific data from New Zealanders about why they are leaving, but said it can look at overall trends.

New Zealand Tightens Visa Rules After Migration Hits ‘Unsustainable’ Levels! Net migration to New Zealand hit a near record high in 2023 after a new temporary work visa was introduced after the pandemic. New Zealand immigration minister Erica Stanford said the system would be changed to tighten visa rules. Photograph: Ben Mckay/AAP. Eva Corlett in Wellington and agencies, Monday 8 April 2024

“Historically, changes in migration are typically due to a combination of factors – those include the relative economic and labour market conditions between New Zealand and the rest of the world,” said Tehseen Islam, Stats NZ’s population indicators manager.

Brad Olsen, Infometrics principal economist, said there are two main factors driving the migration overseas.

“There will be younger Kiwis going overseas for an overseas experience, or a delayed overseas experience, because there have been heavy disruptions over the last few years on that front,” he said.

But half of New Zealanders are moving to Australia, which suggests a greater number of people and families are looking for opportunities and making a more permanent move, he said.

Australian employers have frequently attempted to recruit New Zealand workers with offers of higher pay and better working conditions.

Olsen said while it is normal for New Zealanders to leave the country, it will be harder to convince people to return, if there are ongoing issues around housing affordability and job prospects.

That ‘brain drain’ could pose problems for society as the population ages, Olsen said.

“We need to have as many young people as we can who are still part of the economy … who are being innovative and bringing their new thinking to the game so we can be more productive,” he said.

“If we are losing our young talent and we’re not able to attract them back it makes all of [that] so much harder.”

[dutifullytoocloud]

My obsession with colour

Happily occupying my thoughts this week. influencing both what music I am listening and coincidentally what I am reading. I actually ordered the book last Friday and had it on my doorstep the very next day. I wasn't even sure if the order came through. Just finished reading up on "Isabelline", a variant in the grouping of White. I really like the book despite the book reviews. So its coffee table trivia, as some have labelled it, suits me just fine. When it comes to subject that infuses art, science and history I'm all for it and I will continue to weave through it slowly at my discretion as there is no due return library date and in some ways its really a reference book. "The Secret Lives of Colour" by Kassia St Clair" has happily found its place in my household. As for playlist, urged by Billy Sloan radio broadcast suggestions, which I always succumb to. I just enjoy music themed challenges. I am sure that most of the obscure song selections would not get a look in and an Aussie suggesting Aussie songs on a Scottish radio station is kinda taking the piss....loud and proud I guess. Hey the music from this part of the world is pretty impressive and vice versa. I have grown up with an immense appreciation of music coming from Scotland. Here's my colourful full list.....no longer unnecessarily overwhelming a facebook page and on your own blog you have that freedom to do as you will.

Songs about colour in general

Colours fly and Catherine's wheel- Simple Minds- Why I love - its fireworks its the colour and the motion working together.\

Love is full of Wonderful Colour- Icicle Works- An advisory tale with a positive outlook

Jimi Hendrix- Bold as love- Geez how to wrap up so much in 5 minutes. Genius. Concise and yet has the ability to get your brain ticking overtime in regards to imagery and meaning. Guitar and drumming are both out of this world.

Now for those blue songs- Adore the colour

Bullets and Blue eyes- The Silencers, could of picked a few from "A letter to St Paul" such as "Blue Desire" and " I see Red". But when it comes to dynamics, "Bullets and Blues eyes", really kicks in.

Blue Light Disco- Olympia....she's almost Australia's answer to Joni Mitchel and I swear she must of grown up listening to her music. Dealing with the subject of refugees making the life threatening decision to make their way to Australia perilously by boat. The 1st glimpse of land are the lights in the distance, casting its blue haze. Her lyrics are poetry. " And hope falls like cut kite strings Releasing paper parts from their diamond dreams" Again concise and brain clogs churning.

Out of the Blue- Roxy Music- That demented electric violin it takes you to another realm.

No Blue Skies- Lloyd Cole- Soulful melancholia, and makes me think of being 21 again playing it on cassette.

Blue Bell Knoll-Cocteau Twins- Elizabeth Fraser and her angelic gibberish and mystifying atmosphere. Played this song to death when we were holidaying in Toowoomba. Especially at the end of the day after visiting Federation style houses. It was just so apt.

Blue Day- Mi Sex- New Zealand 80's, great voice and sad loss.

New colours

Green- Alex Lloyd- love the song and also love the film clip. Students reactions show what power music has on people from all walks of life.

Silver tongue- Zulu Winter- I don't think this band is around anymore. Sometime great debuts are really a summary of what a band has gathered in their entire lifetime to that point, and to come up with more is a huge challenge.

Red Letter day- China Crisis- much respect, " Diary of a Hollow horse" was released in 1989 is a great record and a band I have followed on and off. "Christian" from earlier on in the 80's is divine. This song easily led onto the next song choice from a different artist and album that had the same song title "Red Letter day"- but I was taken back more so by the bonus song- "Jet Black the Night"- Lostboy aka Jim Kerr.

Golden Brown- The Stranglers- I was 11 when I 1st heard it and its a song that had a huge bearing on why i am equally obsessed with music as I am with colour. I would hide under my bed to avoid household chores just to hear this song. Its about "escapism" and it was.

New Gold Dream- Everything falls into place. Loving this version at the moment.

[smute]

i really wish i had a home... a geographical home. a place with family or even just distant relatives or childhood friends, a place that feels familiar, a place to return to. but i dont

[knowlesian]

Genuine question, what we know of real blackbeard he was British which ofmd has clearly shown his British roots so we know its canon there. His parents are also white in the flashbacks. So why do you keep saying blackbeard is maori? It seems to me Taika is maori but this part of the actors personal identity is not being highlighted or referred to in the show so I am just curious as to why this seems to be prominent in your metas.

so: i am going to take you at your word that this is a genuine question, and you truly want to understand. i hope i'm right, because i’d like to live in a world where this is genuinely a teachable moment. that said: there is a sick feeling in my stomach as i answer this, and i want you to know that.

the sick feeling is named "this person just did the thing i'm talking about. i have spent all this time and effort and care trying to communicate something i find so very important: it was wasted. either i failed, or they didn’t even try."

like i've said in my meta: when this happens, it hurts. it makes me angry. there is a much angrier version of this ask in my heart where i give it to you real good, because it would make me feel good to do so.

gonna be honest: i do not like this ask, sam i am. i considered not even answering it, in the same way i auto-delete anything hateful or obscene (not colloquial or affectionate). i try not to waste my time in life, and indulging open bigotry with debate or explaining things to people who aren’t interested in what i have to say both feel like time-wasters to me.

but much in the fashion of olu (because at the end of the day, i really hope if i’m like anybody on this show, it’s him) i'm gonna keep hoping for a better world, and so i will swallow that first emotional instinct and lay it out in kinder terms. and just as much as i hope you understand that even asking me this question kind of sucked if you read a word i’ve written and taken it seriously, i hope you take my answer here to heart instead.

there is a quick, practical answer. i will knock this out first, because it’s easy: the reason i say that is because david jenkins says that. to quote this interview:

It ended badly in real life, but we're not doing real life because we've got a Polynesian-Jewish man from New Zealand playing Blackbeard. Once you're doing that, you're not doing real life.

so: i keep saying it because the show is saying it. if you want to argue with the entire creative team up to and including the creator, that’s your choice, but the matter is settled. 

(also, just to clarify: his mother is not played by a white actor in the flashback, while his father is.)

now. let’s tackle the reason i keep having to take stress breaks while i write this.

i understand that you think this was asked politely. you didn’t insult me; you just asked a question. and if we simply deem ‘polite’ to dwell in framing but not context, then i suppose you have been.

i do not see the world this way. hatred rendered in poetry is hatred; justice communicated through the profanest terms is justice. i care a lot about the words i use, in part because i know they’re going to be out there in the world without all the context that lives only in my head and my experiences. it’s why i know i fall short all the fucking time and want to keep improving and refining my language as a life goal, not just a writer thing.

so, you and me? we’re one on this. i’m not saying all this to be like “you are a unique and shitty person”. i have asked many an inadvertently shitty question myself, and i assume i will do so again and again and again. 

now: i’m gonna go ahead and use your words next. 

“It seems to me Taika is maori but this part of the actors personal identity is not being highlighted or referred to in the show”.

i have bolded and emphasized that myself, obviously, because that’s the actual point here. to you, it has not been highlighted or referred to. 

and just real quick, because it’s gonna bug me not to say it:

ofmd has clearly shown his British roots so we know its canon there

using british that way implies british always means white; i am not british, but i can assure you it does not.

now, my own analysis on these issues has focused in on colonialism and race and christianity’s impact on the world (and much like i myself am not māori, i am not jewish; i am very openly a Weird White Jesus expert, so pretending i can speak with any authority on the matter outside my general focus on the very broad history of colonization/empire/enslavement and my own lived experiences would be A Dick Move) but i can also assure you, these things are being highlighted.

the hard pill to swallow here is that these stories are happening right out in the open, alongside a million others; you just can’t see it. and that baseline fact is also okay! like i said: i can sometimes tell those stories i will never live and often can’t even claim i brush up against are happening, but the best i can do is listen and absorb and not pretend i own every floor i step on. so we’re also together on that. 

i am 10000000% sure i have missed so much of the commentary this show is making. it’s part of why i love it so much!

in that vein, the māori and jewish members of the audience i’ve seen speaking on these issues have a lot of really important shit to say, so i’ll direct you towards those perspectives for more on the specifics there and direct myself back to what i can talk about with any authority: why regardless of intent, this question is actually saying “i want you to stop talking about race”.

because why ask it like this? what’s the utility here? you could have just said “hey, i want to understand but i’m not seeing it. why is it important that ed’s māori?” 

instead, you came in with a set point: “it’s not there, because i don’t see it. i’m asking this like a question, but it’s actually a rebuttal.”

i don’t really have a big emotional ending here like i usually do, because i’m tired and was supposed to be doing other shit tonight, but this felt worth nipping in the bud. 

so i guess i will just say: i hope this answers your question, and that it was a genuine question at all.

[conarcoin]

SMPEarth Fanfics

There really isn’t that much fic for SMPEarth so I decided to make a post with a bunch. Some of these are my own, but most aren’t. Long post, so under the cut. I haven’t read all of these myself yet.

MY FICS:

playing imitation games - JoshA20 character study, largely based on the ARGs of SMPEarth. (Oneshot)

and if they laugh at me, i’ll make your heart my home - In an AU where Deo is exiled from Business Bay and joins AE, he finds comfort in Wisp among his new cold & hostile home. (Oneshot)

i’m so sorry (returns) - Slightly canon divergent (just timeline changes, shifting events around). Wisp apologizes for abandoning Business Bay. Deo is upset. (Oneshot)

OTHERS’ FICS:

The Stars Still Love You (They Always Will) - c!Tommy gets sent back in time to SMPEarth. (40/?)

off with their head (wait, are you serious?) - Caught in the middle of the war between Business Bay and the Empire, Charlie has to face his friend, Wilbur, on the battlefield. (Oneshot)

To cure it of sorrow would destroy it - An immortal god, Deo, grows attached to a mortal named Tommy, and is devastated by his death at the hands of a traitor. (Oneshot)

we are the crossroads - Technoblade overworks himself on a particularly scary night at the Antarctic Empire. Phil helps. (Oneshot)

the criminal from korea - Charlie got banished from New Zealand, and lives alone in his country, Kpop. Jack, a leader of the island nation, pays him an unexpected visit to apologize, much to the dismay of the other two New Zealand Soots. (Oneshot)

step one, light me on fire - On Day 19 of Charlie's SMPEarth history, he was named the first and only criminal of New Zealand. (Oneshot)

Letters From Another Millennia - Tommy and his family move into a new house in a small village, it is said to have sheltered magical creatures hunderds— maybe even thousands of years ago. What happens when he finds old letters hidden underneath the floorboards and decides to write responses to them for fun, but ends up getting in touch with a certain someone from the past? (2/15)

Before We Get Older (Let’s Do Everything) - The happiest Deo has ever seen Tommy, he thinks, is right now, as he looks over at Tommy from where he’s lounging in the co-pilot’s seat. (Oneshot)

Misunderstood Emperor - The Antarctic Empire is a grand but isolated country. It plays by its own rules in the grand scheme of things, but one thing is for certain. They are powerful extremely powerful. Ruled by their Emperor Technoblade, who is a mystery to everyone. There are several legends that have told people stories about the great Emperor but none ever tell as much as people would have liked. As one of the immortals, he is a legend in that part. But it's something more for his people and the world. He is a god, The Blood God. He not human as he is above them. This is great and all but what happens when Antarctica is forced out of isolation and people really start to meet the ruler himself. Is he anything they thought him to be? And is being called a god as good as people imagine? We shall see... (2/?)

it’s just a waltz (i’d give you anything you wanted) - After a successful battle campaign across the globe, co-emperors Technoblade and Philza take a reprieve in their mountain palace they call home. A reprieve means a break. Avoiding work. Techno struggles with this, so Phil takes matters into his own hands, and orchestrates a simple, fun plan to help Techno loosen up. (Oneshot)

Moonglass - The Antarctic Empire has long since peacefully disbanded- really, there never was an Empire in the first place. A means to an end and nothing more, their work was done and they retreated back to where their simple work waited in the southern snow. That is, until one day, when Commander Philza Minecraft is nominated to be part of the first group of players to land on the moon. Just a simple trip to survey the land, to evaluate what could be built there one day.... The reports never mentioned the dragon. (7/7)

Snow Angel - The Angel Of Death, now more than ever, is faced with the prospect of eternity. He selfishly hopes he will not fly it alone. (21/21)

Earth and Its Connotations - If things were different, if time had been a little more fluid when her hands had set events into motion, then we might have watched a completely new story unfold from the start. Dream has a question to ask of one of his friends, and that friend has an answer. The butterfly beats its wings and a hurricane brews in the far reaches of the arctic north. (Oneshot)

The Cold Brings People Together - No one would question the bond between the leaders of the Antarctic Empire. Some would call them thick as thieves, birds of a feather, peas in a pod, bolder ones would even call them like a father and son, others would run in fear at the titles 'Blood god' and 'Angel of Death'. Everyone knew that to get to Techno you would have to go through Phil and to get to Phil you would have to go through Techno. The question on the more curious, more daring peoples' minds was, how did the two get so close? (Oneshot)

for dust thou art - The Antarctic Empire's civilization fell long ago, it's cities in ashes and it's kingdom fallen to dust. The ruins are precarious and no one dares trod to the arctic to pick them over. No one, that is, except for you. The ruins of an empire beckon at your mind like the claws of a beast. (Oneshot)

hell hath frozen over. - in a world where not one angel showed him warmth, techno finds life in the arctic thrall of Death. (Oneshot)

Why Did You Return. -  And even as Deo brought the feared Midas sword to hiss neck, he couldn't find himself to feel any fear. The only emotion he could feel was raw regret, and acceptance. He knew he would relinquish his life to a God-slayer, a renowned fearless being, who would stop at nothing to protect those who he considered family. He would lose his life to TimeDeo, once a brother, now an enemy, and Wisp could not bring himself to feel any fear, only the relief that it was someone he still deeply cared for taking the anger out on him in a way he deemed justified, and there was no fear. Only the cold accepting that this was the end. (Oneshot)

I Wear The Chain I Forged In Life - “Oh,” Doomsday says. “We’ve run out of time.” “Doomsday, please, just tell me how to stop this,” Tommy begs. Doomsday does not meet his eyes. “I wear the chain I forged in life, TommyInnit. I made it link by link, yard by yard. Let us hope you’ve done the same.” (Oneshot)

old friends, old scars (new starts) - After betraying him during SMPEarth, Wisp joins the Dream SMP to offer his alliance to Tommy once more. (Oneshot)

After What I Did, How Could You Not? - Nobody had heard from this world-conquering Empire in quite some time. It had been months since Phil or Techno had spoken out for their kingdom and even Newfoundland had been wondering where they’ve gone. Tommy seemed to know, but he didn’t seem keen on sharing. (Oneshot)

[mercurygray]

So, I Hear You Liked: 1917

More World War One Films

I was very excited about 1917 when it first came out because it almost perfectly coincided with the 100th anniversary of the First World War, a conflict that I love to read about, write about, and watch movies about. This period is my JAM, and there's such a lot of good content for when you're done with Sam Mendes's film.

Obviously there are a lot of movies and TV shows out there - this is just a selection that I enjoyed, and wish more people knew about.

Note: Everyone enjoys a show or movie for different reasons. These shows are on this list because of the time period they depict, not because of the quality of their writing, the accuracy of their history or the political nature of their content. Where I’m able to, I’ve mentioned if a book is available if you’d like to read more.

I'd like to start the list with a movie that isn't a fiction piece at all - Peter Jackson's They Shall Not Grow Old (2019) is a beautifully produced film that allows the soldiers and archival images themselves, lovingly retimed and tinted into living color, to tell their own story. It is a must watch for anyone interested in the period.

Wings (1927), All Quiet on the Western Front (1930), A Farewell to Arms (1932, 1957), The Dawn Patrol (1938), Sergeant York (1941), and Paths of Glory (1957) are all classics with a couple of Oscars between them, and it's sort of fun to watch how the war gets changed and interpreted as the years pass. (The Dawn Patrol, for instance, might as just as easily be about the RAF in World War 2.)

All Quiet is based on a famous memoir, and A Farewell to Arms on a Hemingway novel; both have several adaptations and they're all a little different. Speaking of iconic novels, Doctor Zhivago (1965) based on the Pasternak novel of the same title, examines life of its protagonist between 1905 and the start of the second World War.

I think one thing historians agree on is that the start of World War One is worth discussing - and that there's a lot of backstory. Fall of Eagles (1974), a 13 part BBC miniseries, details the relationships between the great houses of Europe, starting in the 1860s; it's long but good, and I think might be on YouTube. The Last Czars (2019) takes a dramatized look at the Romanovs and how their reactions to the war lead to their eventual demise.

As far as the war itself, Sarajevo (2014) and 37 Days (2014) both discuss the outbreak of hostilities and the slow roll into actual battle.

The Passing Bells (2014) follows the whole war through the eyes of two soldiers, one German and one British, beginning in peacetime.

Joyeux Noel ( 2005) is a cute story - it takes place early in the war during the Christmas Peace and approaches the event from a multinational perspective.

War Horse (2011) is, of course, a name you'll recognize. Based on the breakout West End play, which is itself based on a YA novel by Michael Morpurgo, the story follows a horse who's requisitioned for cavalry service and the young man who owns him. Private Peaceful (2012) is also based on a Morpurgo novel, but I didn't think it was quite as good as War Horse.

The Wipers Times (2013) is one of my all-time favorites; it's about a short lived trench paper written and produced by soldiers near Ypres, often called Wipers by the average foot soldier. The miniseries, like the paper, is laugh out loud funny in a dark humor way.

My Boy Jack (2007) is another miniseries based on a play, this one about Rudyard Kipling and his son, Jack, who served in the Irish Guards and died at Loos. Kipling later wrote a poem about the death of his son, and helped select the phrase that appears on all commonwealth gravestones of the First World War.

Gallipoli (1981) is stunning in a way only a Peter Weir movie can be; this is a classic and a must-see.

Gallipoli is a big story that's been told and retold a lot. I still haven't seen Deadline Gallipoli (2015) an Australian miniseries about the men who wrote about the battle for the folks back home and were subject to censorship about how bad things really were. For a slightly different perspective, the Turkish director Yesim Sezgin made Çanakkale 1915 in 2012, detailing the Turkish side of the battle. Although most of The Water Diviner (2014) takes place after the war is over, it also covers parts of Gallipoli and while it didn't get great reviews, I enjoy it enough to own it on DVD.

I don't know why all of my favorite WWI films tend to be Australian; Beneath Hill 60 (2010) is another one of my favorites, talking about the 1st Australian Tunneling Company at the Ypres Salient. The War Below (2021) promises to tell a similar story about the Pioneer companies at Messines, responsible for building the huge network of mines there.

Passchendaele (2008) is a Canadian production about the battle of the same name. I'd forgotten I've seen this film, which might not say very much for the story.

Journey's End (2017) is an adaptation of an RC Sheriff play that takes place towards the end of the war in a dugout amongst British officers.

No look at the Great War is complete without a nod to developing military technologies, and this is the war that pioneers the aviation battle for us. I really wish Flyboys (2006) was better than it is, but The Red Baron (2008) makes up for it from the German perspective.

One of the reasons I like reading about the First World War is that everyone is having a revolution. Technology is growing by leaps and bounds, women are fighting for the right to vote, and a lot of colonial possessions are coming into their own, including (but not limited to) Ireland. Rebellion (2016) was a multi-season miniseries that went into the Easter Rising, as well as the role the war played there. Michael Collins (1996) spends more time with the Anglo-Irish war in the 1920s but is still worth watching (or wincing through Julia Roberts' bad accent, you decide.) The Wind that Shakes the Barley covers the same conflict and is excellent.

The centennial of the war meant that in addition to talking about the war, people were also interested in talking about the Armenian Genocide. The Promise (2016) and The Ottoman Lieutenant (2017) came out around the same time and two different looks at the situation in Armenia.

This is a war of poets and writers, of whom we have already mentioned a few. Hedd Wynn ( 1992) which is almost entirely in Welsh, and tells the story of Ellis Evans, a Welsh language poet who was killed on the first day of the Battle of Passchendaele. I think Ioan Gruffudd has read some of his poetry online somewhere, it's very pretty. A Bear Named Winnie (2004) follows the life of the bear who'd become the inspiration for Winnie the Pooh. Tolkien (2019) expands a little on the author's early life and his service during the war. Benediction (2021) will tell the story of Siegfried Sassoon and his time at Craiglockhart Hospital. Craiglockhart is also represented in Regeneration (1997) based on a novel by Pat Barker.

Anzac Girls (2014) is probably my favorite mini-series in the history of EVER; it follows the lives of a group of Australian and New Zealand nurses from hospital duty in Egypt to the lines of the Western Front. I love this series not only because it portrays women (ALWAYS a plus) but gives a sense of the scope of the many theatres of the war that most movies don't. It's based on a book by Peter Rees, which is similarly excellent.

On a similar note, The Crimson Field (2014) explores the lives of members of a Voluntary Aid Detachment, or VADs, lady volunteers without formal nursing training who were sent to help with menial work in hospitals. It only ran for a season but had a lot of potential. Testament of Youth (2014) is based on the celebrated memoirs of Vera Brittain, who served as a VAD for part of the war and lead her to become a dedicated pacifist.

Also, while we're on the subject of women, though these aren't war movies specifically, I feel like the additional color to the early 20th century female experience offered by Suffragette (2015) and Iron-Jawed Angels (2004) is worth the time.

As a general rule, Americans don't talk about World War One, and we sure don't make movies about it, either. The Lost Battalion (2001) tells the story of Major Charles Whittlesey and the 9 companies of the 77th Infantry division who were trapped behind enemy lines during the battle of the Meuse Argonne.

I should add that this list is curtailed a little bit by what's available for broadcast or stream on American television, so it's missing a lot of dramas in other languages. The Road to Calvary (2017) was a Russian drama based on the novels of Alexei Tolstoy. Kurt Seyit ve Şura (2014) is based on a novel and follows a love story between a Crimean officer (a Muslim) and the Russian woman he loves. The show is primarily in Turkish, and Kıvanç Tatlıtuğ, who plays the lead, is *very* attractive.

Finally, although it might seem silly to mention them, Upstairs Downstairs (1971-1975 ) Downton Abbey (2010-2015) and Peaky Blinders (2013-present) are worth a mention and a watch. All of them are large ensemble TV shows that take place over a much longer period than just the Great War, but the characters in each are shaped tremendously by the war.

[cafffine]

Hey guys, I’ve decided to stop publishing Saltcoats for a number of reasons. I'm aware that many of you are going to initially be let down or confused, but hopefully once you’ve read through this post you’ll understand why this had to stop. I’ll try to hit all my points, but of course if you have any questions pls feel free to dm me or reply to this post.

DISCLAIMER: Ending this fic was a decision I came to by myself! No one asked me to do this, though many did help, and if you have something to add please do not bring other tumblr or ao3 users into the conversation unless they’ve explicitly said they’re ok with that. It’s a draining and heavy topic (not to me, but for those affected) and I don’t want to cause anymore unneeded distress.

Also, I’m the only author, all the problems with this story were created by me, and were biases I should have recognized and acted on much sooner. I’m very thankful to all the people that have reached out to me about the negative impacts on this fic, but it really does come down to: I wrote and published a story that was fundamentally ignorant of its setting and racist. So now I have to do my part to apologize and educate myself/take accountability.

First off, this was a flawed concept to begin with because I was trying to do a low fantasy setting with aliens in period clothes and a work of historical fiction at the same time, and those are not things you can go halfway on.

Historical fiction that centers around people of color has a long history of simply going race-blind and faking diversity by giving poc the roles of white people in Eurocentric stories and erasing their identities. (This article about Bridgerton explains the problem better than I could.) And it was something I tried to avoid by still having the Fetts written as immigrants from Aotearoa (NZ), but completely missed the execution on because I didn’t commit to full historical accuracy in all characters and aspects of the story. Meaning, I might as well have gone race-blind because you can’t pick and choose what to include, it’s just as racist.

This creates situations like the Fetts being immigrants facing real life oppression while the Organas, also people of color, are unaffected by the social climate and living as members of the British upper class. That’s not accurate to any version of history and ends up wiping clean any point I was trying to make about race and oppression. That also extends beyond the Fetts, I was not addressing how the american characters come from a country that still allows for the ownership of slaves, the British oppression of Scottish people and their culture, or even an in-depth look at real Queer communities of that era. (and more)

Given the real life historical climate in the 1850s, a multi-racial story like this one is not successful, and is racist in its ignorance of the struggles of poc, immigrants, and the intersectionality that had with class and crime.

In addition, the Fetts being written as criminals, even if it is framed as a morally correct choice*, is still playing into negative racial stereotypes that shouldn’t have been ignored.

* I should add, I don’t mean to make it sound like i’m creating excuses for myself when I give explanations for some of these choices such as “but it was framed as morally correct”, that doesn’t lessen the damage being done, it’s still racist, I guess I'm just trying to show why so many of these things went overlooked for as long as they did, and how easy it is for white/privileged people to find mental loopholes around racism when you’re not being sufficiently critical of yourself.

On another note, the Fetts being indigenous immigrants to Britain in the 1800s is not something I should have tried to tackle in fanfiction - a medium that often lacks nuance and can easily end up romanticizing or glossing over most heavy topics. This goes for period typical homophobia, addiction, and class struggles as well.

That being said! I’m not implying that any of those things should be completely ignored in fanfiction. Addiction, for example, is something very close to me that I do still want to explore in fanfic for the purposes of education and normalization, I’m not telling anyone what not to write, just checking myself. Because in a story like this where literally everything is so heavily dramatized and also applied to characters of color by me, a white person? It’s only going to end up being out of place, lacking in historical accuracy, and wholly disrespectful.

Another major problem I wanted to address is the relationship between a rich white person and a poverty stricken poc. That's a bad stereotype to begin with, but then I tried and failed to frame Obi-Wan as ignorant and biased to a point where his social status plays into the theme of class critique. But, if he’s still being written as Cody’s love interest, all his negative characteristics are ultimately going to be ignored and excused by the narrative (by me).

I’m not trying to end this conversation, I’ll always be willing to talk about this to anyone who’d want to say/hear more, but I don’t want run the point into the ground with over-explanation.

So, in conclusion, this fic had to stop and be broken down into the problem that it was. All white authors who write for the clones need to be hyper-vigilant about the fact that we are creating narratives for poc, and that our inherent racism is always in threat of being baked into in the stories we publish and spread to an audience. I was in the wrong when I wrote this story, and it should never have gone on for this long. I apologize for both my actions, and to anyone I may have hurt along the way.

This is getting posted on ao3 in the fic, and then, for now anyway, the fic is going to be deleted after a week. I’ll leave this post up and answer everyone unless it's someone trying to change my mind. Also, if I ignore an ask please send it again, tumblr might just have deleted it. I don’t want to try and bury this or run from my mistakes, I just don’t think that leaving the fic up where it can still find an audience will do anyone any good. Thank you for reading

If you're interested here's some resources I've been using to educate myself further:

What caused the New Zealand Wars? - An excerpt of the book by Vincent O'Malley of the same title. It gives a good summary of the violent colonization and oppression of Māori people and their culture by the British empire.

NZ Wars: Stories of Waitara (video) - Very educational documentary about the NZ wars and British colonialism. There are some historical recreations that get violent so pls watch with caution.

Historical American Fiction without the Racism - Tumblr post by @/writingwithcolor that talks specifically about Black people in the 1920's, but makes a good point about race and historical fiction in general. I'd recommend any post from this blog, especially their navigation page just a lot of great resources

Who Gave You the Right to Tell That Story? - An article about writing outside of your race that includes a diverse series of testimonials

History of Scottish Independence - Details the colonization of Scotland by the British empire, sort of long, can cntrl + f to "The Acts of Union" for a more direct explanation.

The best books on Racism and How to Write History - A list of well written and diverse works of historical fiction and why they are good examples of representation

I have a lot more that I can share if you're interested (x x x x) but this post is getting a bit too long.

[rein-ette]

Are you still working on your Commonwealth study? Do you have any thoughts on Arthur's relationships with his colonies apart from Canzuk + US?

Not properly, unfortunately with exams and then work I haven’t had mental/emotional capacity to do real research (and probably won’t for a while 😔). But I have continued to think about and develop certain relationships, and I think I also have old hcs I’ve never shared, so I’ll put those down!

Born into the Empire

Australia

@oumaheroes has already done such great hcs on him idk what I can add, but basically he was a little bit of a rowdy child, always breaking windows and shattering fancy pots, never able to sit still. I think rainbow once mentioned that Ken (short for Kenneth, my name for Aus) was a lot like England as a child in his curiosity and energy, and I wholeheartedly agree. But I think Arthur’s intensity was more inwardly directed, pushing him to pursue and master new talents and learn whatever he could, while Australia is a little more carefree in his love for the outdoors, exploring, jumping around and off things, little wild animals. Unfortunately for him, he was born in a period of the empire when Arthur was very serious about his kids education, and therefore often praised those who studied hard and learned fast, which really just wasn’t Australia’s cup of tea. Australia took this kinda hard and thought he was the “dumb” one in the family that Arthur was always scolding, but in reality Arthur knew and appreciated that Australias interests lay elsewhere — he was just a frustrated, tired, parent who really wanted to give his kids the best while also holding his empire together, two goals that were never going to fit well in the end and would completely exhaust him.

As Australia’s grown older he’s realized a bit of this (not entirely, though) and also that 1) he really did break a lot expensive things and cause general mayhem 2) scolding us Arthur’s way of showing he cares, if he didn’t he wouldn’t have payed attention to him at all 3) despite being a penal colony, he was still one of Arthur’s more “legitimate” children (being white and a boy) and was therefore still incredibly privileged — never having to question, for example, why it was that Arthur was his dad, if it should be this way, or if he had a seat at the family table at all (more on this later).

New Zealand

Zee, from birth, was a clear favourite. Obedient, calm, quietly intelligent, he would also later develop a blistering sense of humour which combined with his appearance made it overwhelmingly clear who’s child he was. If Ken questioned his place in the family because of his poor academic record and others did because of their appearance/race/other complications, Kaelan never had such problems; his siblings called him the “prince.” Zee, however, also had a charm that, like Matthew, endeared him to his siblings and mostly protected him from jealousy, though he certainly still had issues with being called a try hard, daddy’s boy, bossy, arrogant. Certainly as a child Zee was a little prideful and, under that unperturbed demeanour, willful, but he grew out of it by the 20th century and became one of those most trusted by Arthur, second only to Matthew. He’s also always been inseparable from his brother Australia despite their differences, and today they both have one of the healthiest and most amicable relationships with Arthur of any nation, let alone former colonies (family road trips, every summer).

Bermuda

I absolute fell in love with this girl after reading about here, once, in this fic by @shachaai, and after that my mind just ran away with me. For me, her human name given to her by Arthur just has to be Ariel — for the little mermaid reference, yes, symbolizing her connection to the sea and stunning good looks, but also because:

1. Ariel is a biblical name, meaning lion of God. This makes sense to me, because Bermuda began as a Portuguese trade post, so Arthur definitely consulted our resident bad catholic Port before naming her.

2. Ariel used to be boys name. This also makes sense, because I hc Bermuda was and still is a tomboy. Bitch is fierce, takes no prisoners, and has zero filter. Her letters to Arthur, which all the colonies sent so Arthur could keep an eye on things, were full of shit like “I swear to god if the Spanish don’t get out of my waters I might eat one of them,” and “father, I asked you for destroyers two months ago, and yet you sent them to Hong Kong — could you explain this most unusual occurrence, surely it’s not that you forgot”, and “thank you for the harpoon on my birthday, I caught a small shark a couple days ago and have sent you some of its teeth for your collection.” Arthur tolerates this attitude because he’s weak when it comes to girls; he absolutely spoils his daughters (and flushes like a 16 year old when a woman so much as bats her eyelashes at him). Yes, p*ssywhipped Arthur is a hill I will die on.

3. It also suits her because? Ariel? Shakespeare? The Tempest? Bermuda Triangle? Shipwrecks? Daughter-like figure of powerful and vengeful sorcerer? Yeah. And this girl is a fire spirit — she is so lively, snarky, clever. As she’s grown older she’s mellowed out a little, but still: a no shit taken, no fucks given type of gal.

4. Speaking of growing up, she’s also become quite the beauty. Shacha, if I’m remembering correctly, described her as dark skinned, wavy-haired, and green eyed and that image has been burned onto the back of my eyelids ever since. Those Iberian genetics really be pulling through for her, that’s for sure. Engport love child if I’ve ever seen one. Definitely one of the prettiest in her family.

Singapore

I’ve already mentioned this to needcake, but I’m not too big a fan of canon Singapore, so this is my oc version. Singapore is fascinating to me because it had only a very small local population before it became a colony (The original settlement had actually been destroyed by the Portuguese about two centuries before the British started building a port there.) So nation-tans like Singapore and Bermuda really are Arthur’s children in the most direct sense of the word. And yet, Singapore is mostly ethnically Chinese, with Malays being the second largest group. Growing up Asian in a white, Victorian era family surely cannot have been easy and more than once Singapore probably wondered if there hadn’t been some mistake. To make up for the constant fear that he wasn’t “really” British, Singapore studied ferociously and had a truly terrifying work ethic. I’m not sure if this is common knowledge outside Asian circles, so I’ll mention that this hc comes from the fact Singapore is well known for having truly exceptional students and some of the most prestigious schools. Singaporeans score highly in literally everything and they have an advantage with good English learning environments, a highly desirable trait in Asia, but these results come from brutally long hours — and its really saying something that they’re known for working hard, considering the studying ethic of students in Korea, Japan, and China aint nothing to sneeze at, either. To me this actually fits really well with Singapore’s upbringing in Arthur’s household, because Arthur himself prizes intelligence and hard work above all else, being a workaholic himself.

As for their relationship, it was probably the best when Singapore was young and peaked in the 1930s with the massive naval base the British built at Singapore, at the time the largest dry dock in the world. Singapore was a well-behaved child, not necessarily introverted but not rowdy either, and all the way into his teenage years he truly admired Arthur and was proud to be a part of the British Empire, despite his lingering unease and insecurities. The British defeat in World War II, however, was a massive turning point. He had worked his ass off to be a good son, a good brother, to contribute to the only family and system he had ever known, and he had thought by the 30s he was finally on his way to becoming a fine adult. And suddenly, the British surrender brings his entire world crashing down. He had followed the rules faithfully thinking it was his destiny, but suddenly it was clear that all rules were made up. Of course, his insecurities exploded. If the empire was a ruse, what the hell was he? A part of the illusion? He couldn’t have a truly Asian identity, because many of the old East Asian nations shunned him for his Western upbringing, and he could not entirely understand their values either. So he was a kid who kinda had to figure out late and very very suddenly who the fuck he was and wanted to be.

And, well, he’s done pretty well for himself, hasn’t he. After having a total crisis and questioning everything, I think Singapore slowly started to realize that just because the British Empire as a political entity didn’t last forever, that didn’t mean that his entire childhood and identity weren’t real. The love he gave to his siblings and the love he got back, the hard work he put in, his bond with Arthur and the safe, happy childhood he had — those memories and feelings didnt have to be diminished by what came after. Essentially, he learned the lesson all nations have to learn, which is that one needs to be able to discern between duties as a nation and feelings as a human being, and to some extent keep them separate to protect both.

Whoooooo ok I’ll stop there because this turned into a dissertation, sorry. Let me know if there are any specifics u want me to elaborate on or anything I missed, but I’ll leave this here for today :)

[agentnico]

Dune (2021) Review

Hey, I watched a 2 hour and 30 minute movie trailer, what did you do today??

Plot: Paul Atreides, a brilliant and gifted young man born into a great destiny beyond his understanding, must travel to the most dangerous planet in the universe to ensure the future of his family and his people. As malevolent forces explode into conflict over the planet's exclusive supply of the most precious resource in existence, only those who can conquer their own fear will survive.

So me and my fiancée watched Dune. The new big science fiction epic by acclaimed director Denis Villeneuve and based on the classic book of the same name by Frank Herbert. Before I go on with this review I’d like to note that I have not read the original novel, nor have I seen the old 1984 film adaptation by David Lynch, so I went into this thing with a blank slate, not really knowing much about the movie besides the cast members in it and that there are giant worms doing worm stuff. As such my opinion is based solely on what I’ve seen in this movie, so for all I know fans of the original novel are going to dig this film and think it’s the best adaptation to have ever been adapted in adaptation form! I’m saying all this because having seen Dune, I cannot say I am a fan.

Denis Villeneuve is unarguably a very talent filmmaker. I’ve grown to appreciate many of his prior works from his more mainstream stuff such as Arrival and Prisoners, to the more indie smaller films like the weird yet thrilling Enemy. What I feel Villeneuve specialises in most is blending the big scale of blockbusters with the more alternative art-house flicks. His best example of this is the epic Blade Runner 2049, that featured a stylized look and feel, with the neon lights and the bright colours and massive CGI effects whilst telling a more grounded and intelligent personal story. Look, I really really enjoyed Blade Runner 2049, okay?? I thought it was really good and thought provoking and I won’t accept any of the harsher reviews! But I digress, Villeneuve is a talented filmmaker. And with Dune you can tell that he definitely has a strong passion and love for the Frank Herbert original novel, as the movie tries to create a futuristic dystopian world that feels lived in and has its own mythology and beliefs. However from a visual aspect straight up this is the most bland looking Villeneuve movie. The colour palette is non existent and everything looks dark and grey. Which is really disappointing after seeing how much colour was in Blade Runner 2049. I get that that is a different movie and the world is different, but there are so many ways one can make a dessert look more interesting. Both Mad Max and Star Wars have managed to make dessert plains look visually more interesting than this. The sands of Dune look, I keep saying it, so bland. There’s a couple of nice shots but at the end of the day its just a dessert. Which is why I very much preferred the first 20 minutes of this film that is set on the home planet of House of Atreides, as the landscapes show more colour and life and even reminded me a bit of the New Zealand vistas of Middle Earth. Literally, just look at this shot...

In the actual movie this shot is much more bigger and epic and I truly felt like I was about to see something truly beautiful. But then half an hour in we actually reach the sands of Dune and from there the movie lost any last piece of visual appeal.

Now let’s discuss my earlier comment about watching a 2 hour and 30 minute trailer. For that is what this movie feels like. The entire thing is constantly building up to something, and providing endless teases through dream sequences about what is to come, and the entire exposition focuses on prophecies and what is meant to happen, and just when we’re about to get to the good stuff, the movie abruptly ends. Look, I get that this is a Part One of a story, but with the sequel currently not even green-lit, the film feels incomplete. I just feel like I paid to see a big prolonged movie trailer. Yes, naturally we’ve had films before that only told a beginning of a story, but those films still had a natural beginning, middle and end. Think of any of the Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter movies, they all told their own individual stories whilst also managing to tease future instalments. Dune however is specifically only a massive tease. And whilst you get teased, you have to spend time with characters all of which only have one-note personalities. Oh look, there’s Oscar Isaac moping about telling his son that he’s meant for better things but that he will still love him if he doesn’t accept his destiny. There’s Josh Brolin walking around acting cool. That’s it, that’s the character. He’s jacked and muscly and he’s cool. Or Dave Bautista walking around screaming like his character Drax from the Guardians of the Galaxy movies, only with even less personality and life in him. There are many talented actors here, but they all seemed to be forced to act minimalistic with hardly any expressions. The only members of the cast I’d say actually showed some form of emotion is Timothee Chalamet as the lead character Paul, who at least sheds a tear or two, and also Jason Momoa seems like he just walked onto set after a lunch break on Aquaman, did his thing and then jolly-like skipped back to the Aquaman set. Otherwise everyone else simply walked in, said their lines in a dark and brooding way cause dark and brooding is cool these days, and that is all.

The story of Dune I feel actually had a lot of interesting stuff in. I loved seeing the political agenda of the various Houses, and how the Emperor (not Palpatine!!) who they all serve is an insecure fellow who’s afraid of any of them stepping out of line, so he makes the Houses argue amongst one another instead. I also appreciated the metaphor of the group of witches who are treated like this religious cult that no one messes with and who’s orders and requests are followed no matter what. Catholic Church anyone? So there are many interesting ideas and narrative dynamics at play here, I simply wish we got to see more of that. Oh, and I completely forgot to mention the music score by the one and only Hans Zimmer! So here’s the thing, Hans Zimmer does his usual shtick of using musical instruments and techno keyboards to emphasise the darkness of the situation, but he also gets this woman to operatically scream the main theme over and over again every 5 minutes, and honestly I’m surprised that woman didn’t lose her vocal chords by the end of the movie. Just the same vocal theme over and over again.

Dune is an incomplete movie, but also on its own merit is a flawed piece of work. I appreciate that it may possibly be loyal to the fan base of the original novel, but as a movie I can’t say I enjoyed it. It’s difficult, I can’t say it is a terrible movie. Again, you can tell the production crew went through a lot of effort to bring this thing to life, but personally I feel like they missed the mark. And my lovely fiancée agrees and her word is gold to me so that’s enough for me.

Overall score: 5/10

[arrivisting]

I’d love author commentary on basically the whole scene at Ekkaia in all my war is done (or any individual part of that scene, if your prefer). Taken together, it’s one of the most beautiful and emotionally complex and heartrending things you’ve written, from the description of the sea itself, to the difficulties of Fingon and Alqualondë, to Gil and the ocean and his ‘mother’, to Fingon and Gil beginning to tackle the thorny subect of Maedhros.

I should admit something about all my war is done: it's the most fugue-like my writing has ever been. I jotted down a few notes on my commute into work - I was deeply underwater with my PhD at the time, three months away from submitting - and then the idea of writing a sequel to scion seized me so profoundly that I sat down in the Starbucks where my bus stops, took out my laptop, and wrote instead of just collecting my coffee and walking down to my office. I wrote 15k. In one day. In about five or six hours. I've never achieved anything like that before or since - I do have good days where I can knock 2-4k out easily, but not 15k. (You might note that the posted part of all my war is done is only 12k, but I wrote all the way up into the next bit with Fingon in Tirion that you've read, up until Turgon at the dinner table). I didn't sit down or plan events; I didn't actually know much about what would happen: but I knew they were going to Ekkaia and they'd have some kind of resolution there. These are my phone-notes, from that morning:

You can see, I think, something of the way an idea hits me. I note down a few snatches of plot, not necessarily in any order, some lines I think people should say at some point, although I might not use them, sketch out some things (Formenos's ruins were going to feature more heavily, but they're waiting for a later story).

(It makes me laugh, the words my phone doesn't accept - Gil-galad, for one - and the ones it automatically capitalises from where I've yelled enthusiastically about elf things at people. I never stop long enough to correct spelling etc when I'm trying to get something down).

I clearly knew from inception that I wanted Fingon's place to be called the hill of waiting, and had tried out the name in Sindarin; because my verbs are not good, I came up with Amon Dartha. It was when I was redrafting that I realised Amon Darthir had existed actually in Dor-lomin(!!!) and the name was even more perfect symbolically than I'd meant it to be! Did I know that, unconsciously? I don't know.

You can see, too, that the Sea of Ekkaia was almost the very first point to hit me, and that I knew it and the scene there would be important, and that I knew that the story was about Fingon finding a way to tell Gil-galad that he had been loved, and wanted, and that meant talking about Maedhros; and that at the end I wanted Gil-galad to be gently, impersonally, firmly clear that he would not, could not, be staying to wait with Fingon.

Okay, DVD commentary proper - I'm sorry, I remember awfully little about writing this, given the fugue state and my thesis and everything, so I'm not sure how useful this will be!

“Oh,” said Gil-galad when they broke out of the woods and began to ride down over the dune-lands to the rocky shore. “Oh!”

The Sea of Ekkaia was beautiful, in its own way, but that way that was like no other place in Arda, in either Aman or Middle Earth.

It was a dark-blue that was almost black, even in the late afternoon, and the shore was less sand than gravel, a strange inconsistent rubble of rock and broken sea-shells that had been dashed to pieces by the constant fury of the waves. Staring out to sea, one did not see the far-away horizon the way one did on the gentler coast of Belegaer: there was no gentle faraway blue haze through which one might, perhaps, on a clear day, imagine that Middle Earth could be glimpsed, or at least the Straight Path.

No: instead along the horizon there was a seam of silver light, and then a great blackness, where the Sea of Ekkaia met the Uttermost West that was not quite the Doors of Night, but was certainly the end of Aman itself. If you stood on the shore watching, the seam would ripple with a pulse of light, sometimes green and sometimes white.

It was so far from anywhere the Eldar of Valinor lived. While they clustered around the Belegaer like moths to flame, this shore seemed instead to repel them. Was it the sight of the world’s end itself? It might be; yet Fingon thought there was more to why this wilderness was so little visited, this howling black sea lashing itself against a grey shore. It was beautiful, but not in the way Elves liked things to be beautiful: it was too raw, too unfinished, too savage.

It was too close to where Mandos kept his Halls, which were not only a thing of spirit but also matter, at least in the way that things in Aman were both. Too close to where Nienna’s tower looked out into the Void and where she wept, and wept, and wept. It was too close to death and to rebirth, to judgment and to pity.

There's a little Dawn Treader, I think, in this idea of the uttermost West. I don't know why I thought the seam of the world should pulse with strange light, but it's an uncanny kind of geography, so near Mandos and Nienna, and I like the sense that this is the end of the world, but not the end of the universe.

A lot of this came together serendipitously. I knew some kind of memorialisation of the river that bore Gil-galad needed to be part of his story; that meant going to the sea; and it's clear from the notes that I had already decided that couldn't mean Alqualonde because of kinslaying reasons and memories. (And that that too would need to be confronted). Therefore: roadtrip to Ekkaia. Therefore, the question: what would Ekkaia be like? We don't really know anything about it - only the good qualities of Belegaer. This was really written by a process of inversion, a way of pulling what we know about Belegaer inside-out, and imagining a place at the world's edge, a place that was empty, a place that was uncannily close to difficult things, to Mandos and Nienna; a place that seemed to repel the Eldar as surely as Belegaer drew them like iron filings.

I was thinking visually about New Zealand, too. I spent my childhood summers on the beaches up north, mostly around Tūtūkākā, which are bright and lovely, with golden or white or tawny sand, with gnarled pohutukawa and blue-green water. Like this:

That's what beach and sea meant to me, and it was a shock the first time I went to one of the black sand beaches where the wind howled and the colours weren't blue, green, gold, but iron, grey, navy, black. I loved it, but it felt so other, so passionate, so strange. That shock and that wild beauty and desolation were things I wanted to get at, though Ekkaia would be far more wild and desolate still.

They left the horses in the thin sea-grass, and their shoes, too, and walked down to the water. “I missed it,” Gil-galad said, and closed his eyes, breathing in the brine. “I missed it badly, all the long years besieging Mordor before I died.”

I think Gil-galad would be very marked by his upbringing first in the Falas and then on Balar; you don't lose that, if you grew up by the sea.

The wind took up his long dark hair and made a banner of it as they walked along the rough crescent of rocky ground where the waves met the shore, and around their bare ankles small stones tumbled back and forth in the lace-edge of the water.

When I was young I used to stand in the water and let the waves bury me up to my ankles, watching the water move in, out, spreading skirts of lace overlapping as new waves came in. I could do it for hours. There's something very liminal about the water's edge, between the solid land and the sea, which is why I put this conversation in it, I think. They're in a liminal space and at a liminal moment. It's the scene the whole story has been inexorably building toward, the point where all Fingon's painful scraping-away of his barriers finally reaches his skin.

“Sometimes in Middle Earth it became very difficult to believe in the Valar,” Gil-galad said, his eyes still closed, “in the blood, and the mud, and the filth. There were so many great and small unfairnesses, day upon day, year upon year.” He opened his eyes and looked towards the Uttermost West where the world ended. “And here it is impossible not to. Look at it!"

This is a little more hopeful than the original version, which I don't have anymore, but went pretty much:

"Sometimes in Middle Earth it was very difficult to believe in the Valar,” Gil-galad said. "In the blood, and the mud, and the filth. There were so many great and small unfairnesses, day upon day, year upon year.”

It was a comment more about Gil-galad's rueful scepticism than wonder - because he fought the Dagorlad before he died, because he spent the last ten years of his life in mud and blood and filth and horror. I work on the First World War - its literary legacy and traces in the decades after, more than its immediate experience or actuality, because there was a ten-year period after 1918 where it was more latent than overt, a traumatic lacuna of silence, a Nachträglichkeit- and I thought in the blood, and the mud, and the filth was a little too on the nose.

I kept it, though, because Tolkien was drawing on his own memories of the trenches with the Dagorlad and the Dead Marshes, with those blurred lines of solid land and mud/bog, the living mixed up with the remains of with the dead, all the themes you see again and again in the war poetry and the officer war-books. (Santanu Das is very good on this, as is Eric Leed). Paul Fussell is a bit old-hat now, but his argument that WWI altered the sensibility of its survivors because of their close, consanguinous co-existence with the dead is something I still find valuable. I think there's a lot of WWI survivor in the way I think of Gil-galad, actually, I'm just realising - not that he survived the Last Alliance. He's detached in a different way from Fingon. Fingon's built himself a thick layer of repression/denial, a kind of callous to protect himself from confronting or thinking about what Maedhros did, and what that means for him and to him; Gil-galad is entirely present, but somewhat detached in some ways, the way people who came back from war could be. Not that Fingon and Finrod aren't also separated from the Amanyar by their time in Beleriand and experience of war and death, but Gil-galad lived there for millennia, and he fought a longer, harder, more total kind of war than they did.

But he's at the Sea of Ekkaia, as west as you can get. So much of Tolkien is about that endless longing glance west, that movement: why is this very westernmost edge so under-explored?

I wanted Gil-galad to be softened by this encounter with the sea, so I went back and let his wonder be as much at the spectacle itself as the sea, like the greater hand at work he had sometimes doubted being visible was something wonderful rather than something to be bitter about. I wanted to position him to be potentially open to, perhaps, the Valar; perhaps, to Fingon. I hope he doesn't come off as closed-minded: I think of him as having a fair mind, and good judgment, but - despite placing him here between the sea and the shore - very clear personal lines between what he thinks is just, and what is not. Certainly, it helps a lot, never having known the Feanorians when they had not fallen.

The seam of the universe pulsed with light, and beyond it was – what?

Unutterable nothingness, something worse than death.

Perhaps Maedhros.

This is an important line for Fingon. He hasn't though the name of his own accord for much of the story, flinching away from it; it's only come in when Finrod and then Gil-galad speak the name. This is the first time he's thought it clearly of his own free will, and this is I think the first signal that he's brought Gil-galad here to be as honest and earnest with him as he can be, however much it hurts, or however much it might drive him away. Because if he isn't, and doesn't, Gil-galad will be driven away anyway, and Fingon wants to be connected with him, the first time he's wanted that kind of bond with anyone since he returned.

(I think of Finrod as someone who just kept turning up, regularly, and forcing Fingon to associate with him; and then bringing Amarie; and then his children; and not taking no for an answer. It bothers Turgon rather terribly that they seem to be friends now, when they were never that close Before: that Fingon pushes him away, but allows Finrod to keep pushing; that Finrod does push. He doesn't know about Gil-galad, of course).

He's brought Gil-galad here to show him if possible that he was wanted, to conjure up lost Ringwil where she might be felt if not found; and to do the same for Maedhros. This is a signal that this journey to the sea is as much about Gil-galad's missing father as his missing mother.

The almost-forgotten tang of salt in the air always mingled with the smell of blood in Fingon’s worst memories, and he was not the only one who remembered. The waves were gentle around Gil-galad’s feet, but they boiled furiously around Fingon’s, delivering small spiteful slaps at his calves.

Spiteful was probably the wrong word here. I don't necessarily mean a dramatic boiling or bubbling; but the water is harsh where it touches him, the kind of slapping roughness you get when the tide is coming in rough.

It took Gil-galad longer to mark the difference, engrossed in the joy of the sea and spectacle as he was, and when he did, his face changed. There was something terribly sad in his eyes when he lifted them from the water to look at Fingon.

It wasn’t why he had brought Gil-galad here; but Fingon didn’t want to imagine the look he would receive if he brushed aside the silent question. “No,” he said. “I am not forgiven.”

“So I see.”

They could probably leave it there.

But Fingon won't, because he's trying. He's really trying to connect after all the time flinching away from it, and he's remembering what Gil-galad said about talking, and what Finrod said about mistakes and silences in their first life.

He said, “You said you loathed the thought of being the son of – a murderer. But my own hands have not been clean since Alqualondë, and death didn’t unstain them. All the time you thought I might be your father, you must have known I was a Kinslayer, too.”

I tried to signal this in their earlier tower conversation with Finrod, and Gil-galad's changing of the topic, but I feel like it's a little abrupt here.

“Yes,” Gil-galad said, and his expression didn’t change. “And when the knights that had served you came to me, they told me that you killed that day in ignorance, that you came upon a battle already being fought; that you took up your sword to save those you loved and didn’t question whether it was just. I heard that from others, too, those who had less reason to bend facts to a flattering pattern; survivors of Gondolin and of Nargothrond. I did ask."

“Ignorance wasn’t an excuse. I died ashamed of it, and I live again with the shame.”

"Good!” said Gil-galad, and there was no forgiveness in his voice, even when Fingon jerked his head up in shock. Instead there was the stern ring of a king used to weighing the ideals of justice against the world as it was, the king who had walked arm in arm with Eonwë the Maia, led his people through many full-fledged wars, and held court and meted justice to them for an Age. “That gives me a far better opinion of you than any of the stories did! I’m glad.”

I remember talking to you about this in the comments, about what it meant that Gil-galad wasn't forgiving him. I think I really meant condone, but I also don't think it's Gil-galad's place to absolve Fingon - he wasn't the one wronged! - and that it's important to me that, because Fingon does truly regret it, he doesn't wish to be absolved, to slide away from it. I don't mean he ought to wallow in it or flog himself with it daily, but I think it would be important to him to shoulder and own that guilt rather than ever allowing himself to put it behind him or have someone else tell him it’s quite all right.

I think this is a moment where I show that they're quite similar, too, because even if Fingon wasn't aware that a bracing, clear assessment was just what he wanted, it was what he needed, rather than people being kind (which he's had a lot of, since he returned; and which hasn't touched that central guilt he's hidden from them, that he loved Maedhros, who had done such terrible things. It's prevented him from accepting kindness made him block people reaching out to him. Gil-galad is not being kind, but just, and still reaching out).

It felt like Fingon had been struggling to take a full lungful of air for a long time, and now something constricting in his chest had loosened, as it hadn’t even after the Valar themselves had judged him. It was only now that he realised that he hadn’t wanted Gil-galad to forgive or absolve him. He had wanted – needed – Gil-galad to be better than him, to withhold forgiveness when it was unmerited; and Gil-galad had. He had become the shining legacy they had all hoped he would be, the thing they had all somehow done right.

The water slapped at his ankles again, in impatient reminder.

This is too brief a transition. I should have fleshed the join out more.

“I think Ulmo would come to you here, if you called. You were a king by the sea in Middle Earth, and you may not remember it, but it was a river who gave you life.”

Gil-galad looked at him as if he’d grown an extra head. “What?”

“I brought you here for a reason,” Fingon said. “Where did they go, the drowned and poisoned rivers of Beleriand? I don’t know; but Ulmo might.”

I've really personified the rivers, but I think it's a clear and easy extrapolation from the Withywindle and the River-daughter in The Fellowship of the Ring that I don't need to justify in order to argue that every river might have had its own attendant Maia-spirit. It does make what happened to the Rivers of Beleriand much worse, though, and I wanted to look at the way a character that was a throwaway mechanism in scion ended up being sickened and dying as horribly as Beleriand did; this story was really about following all those lighter bits in scion home, to the end of the line, and looking at the long-term impacts of something that began more lightly. In this verse, Ringwil was a river, but also a person; and I think of her and Finrod as sharing a strange human-river friendship and overlapping enthusiasms.

He clapped Gil-galad on the shoulder, hoping it said all the things he meant it to say. Affection had been so easy for him once, in the life that had been taken from him by the fiery flails of the Balrogs, but now it came hard, and the sea-smell was in his nose, the terrible memories too close to the surface.

He had surely outstayed Ulmo’s tolerance by now. Fingon left Gil-galad there in the water, and didn’t dare glance back until there was thin sandy soil under his feet again.

Only then did he look once more towards the sea.

Gil-galad was standing in the shallows. His broad shoulders were bunched tight, as if he was readying himself for something very difficult, a confrontation with one of the Valar he had long doubted.

Then he spread his arms out, empty-handed, and tipped his head back, and the light on the horizon grew unbearably bright, whiter than white, more silver than silver; and a face began to move upon the water.

I really like this, honestly. Which I can't/don't say often! The temptation to overwrite this was strong, to show this encounter, to describe the Vala: but I think it's often stronger not to show something numinous, to pull away, to let the mind fill it in.

Again, this is Gil-galad as I imagine him: still somewhat distanced from the Valar by the Dagorlad and the things that happened there (and I think perhaps doubly unhappy in that he lived through the end of an Age once before, and that time, at least, the Valar came: they did not come in the Second, nor send so much as a messenger, and such obscenities as the fall of Ost-in-Edhil and the drowning of Numenor had been allowed to happen, and Men and Elves were left alone to come together and break Sauron's grip). Doubting, but not angry; doubting, but still curious. Open to listening.

a face began to move upon the water is of course a deliberate sideways reference to

And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.

-

It took a very long time. Fingon could not watch; his eyes dazzled.

Can you tell I was teaching The Duchess of Malfi at this time? Cover her face; mine eyes dazzle; she died young. That sense of a light too bright and white to look upon; that sense of guilt; that faint reference to life lost untimely. This wasn't meant to be a direct intertextual reference, but that net of meaning was there, lightly. Again, I wanted to under-write rather than over-write. I know I have a tendency to over-write.

And of course - there's a sense here that Fingon is refusing the kind of close enoucnter with Ulmo he could/might have. There's water in his eyes. From the wind?

-

“Thank you,” Gil-galad said when he rejoined him at last. His eyes were glowing, and he whistled Ceredir to him from where he was tearing ropey roots of sea-grass from the dunes with great relish. “Thank you for bringing me here;” and he didn’t say it the way he’d thanked Fingon for the horse, or the armour, or the sword, or even the lance.

Because this is a real gift, something that means something to both of them, something more honest/painful. Fingon's been trying to connect through gifts but not serious conversation or sharing, like some estranged parents do, throwing money at the problem rather than giving of their time or their selves, and however well-meant, it hasn't worked.

“I didn’t truly do anything."

“You brought me to the Sea. I know – I could see – how difficult it was for you."

"Well,” Fingon said lamely. He cleared his throat. “What did Lord Ulmo say about – oh, I can’t call her your dam! – the Maia who bore you? Did she – was she there?”

The dam pun is Finrod's. Don't blame me.

A little of the light dimmed, but it didn’t quite fade away. “No, she’s gone. Back to the Timeless Halls, he says; but one with him again, Ulmo, at the same time.” Gil-galad made a noise. “I don’t pretend to understand any of it, all the metaphysical nonsense of the Ainur! But he was kind to me, and he told me something of her – that she delighted in the making of me.” The corner of his mouth turned up. “I left the flowers we gathered earlier in the waves for her and the sea didn’t dash them back onto the shore. I’m sure Ulmo broke a few laws of Arda there.”

I like this image of the flowers suspended in the water. I had it clearly in mind from before I began to write.

"You were wanted.”

“I’m beginning to believe it,” Gil-galad said.

“You should,” Fingon said. He took a breath. Talking is how you sort things out; and a long time ago, Fingon had been known for his valour. Gil-galad deserved to know how much he had been wanted, who had called himself a political compromise given birth. The truth of that had stung.

And it was less than the truth. Fingon could still remember the first time he had opened his mind to Maedhros over the leagues between them and let him see Gil’s small face through his own eyes, holding nothing back. He had shown Maedhros the dark long lashes and the squashed baby nose, the milk-blister on the bow of Gil’s upper lip, the way his whole head turned an alarming red when he wailed; shared with Maedhros Gil’s fondness for being tossed in the air, his splashing joy in his bath.

This is is me trying to describe a baby without being too sentimental about it, because Fingon wasn't all, oh look at the toesie-woesies, or my son, my son: his eye was more detached, and you see him in scion thinking of Gil-galad as it.

I've been thinking about why Fingon in no way allowed himself to consciously dote on the baby, why that streak of denial that's so strong in his second life was there in his first light, and really: it would have been dangerous to let himself love him, to see Gil as his son and Maedhros's. He was born at a time of terrible loss, after the Flame, when they all expected they could die themselves. He was moved around Beleriand like a game-piece. Fingon was always going to lose him: he wasn't going to get to raise him, after all, until and unless Morgoth was defeated. Maedhros wasn't going to meet him, until and unless &c. It was easier not to let oneself get attached than it was to confront those hard facts and let oneself be hurt by them. Easier to think of him as a baby Finwean prince, and that only: a political pawn, not a son.

Conversely, Maedhros maintains a physical distance, but not an emotional one. Here's a bit from Maedhros's perspective:

Finrod had told him that. They had written, back and forth, in the long months as Ringwil’s belly swelled, as the child formed, as it began to move and stretch and turn frog-like inside her. They had corresponded constantly during the first months of the child’s life in Nargothrond, and during the first months of his life, Finrod had sent long scrolls detailing every change in Artanaro’s weight, his length, his hair colour, his eye colour, how much milk he’d consumed each day: screeds winging forth to Himring until the child was old enough to survive the secret trip north.

Fingon’s letters had been infuriatingly spare of useful information while the child was fostered at Barad Eithel. Beloved, ineloquent Fingon: Fingon, who had nevertheless shown him the child as no reams of paper could.

Fingon had given him forever the rounded bloom of his full cheeks, and the pursed mouth, sullen in sleep: the feathery, rather cross-looking eyebrows, and the small hands with their deep dimples and smaller fingernails, curled into the edge of Fingon’s furred mantle.

Maedhros had felt the way Fingon hovered between wonder and confusion at what they’d wrought: the way he couldn’t quite manage to think of the child as his own, this thing spun out of air and calculation and freshwater into heavy, solid life. He could have loved him so desperately, Maedhros knew that. He was halfway there, hovering in terror on the edge, afraid of falling. If the baby had stayed in Barad Eithel longer; if Fingon had watched him begin to creep around on fat little knees, to pull himself up on the furniture and to take his first steps – to hear the baby babble turn into words and speech – his heart would have opened to him like a flower, and the child would have become the centre of his universe, the sun in his sky.

Fingon had never known what to do with Idril as an infant, either, but he’d easily become an adored uncle as she grew up. If they’d had more time – if the child had been permitted to stay with Fingon even a month longer before being sent for safety to Cirdan –

Well, they’d never had enough time.

There had been few walls between them then, so he had felt Maedhros’s bright joy, the painful love, in its moment of birth: swelling and swelling like a cloud with rain, as though his heart was growing and his blood was leaking out of him at the same time, transmuting into pure tenderness and iron purpose.

I like this because I think of the Ekkaia scene as a cloudburst, full of emotion that has been swelling and swelling and now released. This is one bit of the breaking-through.

He had never needed to ask whether Maedhros considered Gil-galad a son.

“I don’t want to talk about – him,” Fingon said with difficulty, and the salt breeze stung his face, his eyes. “I know you loathe him, and rightly; and I do, too. I do hate him; or I hate what he did. I do! But you should know – you deserve to – that he wanted you, badly, although he never met you; he never wanted the shadow on him to touch you or to taint you.

And this. You can see here where I spun off into cliffs of fall, which isn't a scion story, but sprung out of this speech. It was already there in those sketchy notes, too, a lot of what Fingon's saying here: this important line about hating Maedhros, or what he did (that movement from clear certainty to trying to separate the deeds from the loved one; to urgent reptition - I do! I mean it, I really do! - which means he doesn't, can't: this is the heart of Fingon's guilt, because he wants to hate Maedhros utterly, but he can't, and he is profoundly in denial about that).

“He always wanted children; I took that from him even before the Oath did, but I gave it back to him with you. I loved you first of all for that, but he loved you for yourself. Because you existed, against all hope and possibility and fate and chance; and because you were ours.”

Gil-galad said nothing. There was still a wildflower tucked behind his ear, but the brilliance had quite left his eyes.

“Well,” Fingon said at last. “I needed to tell you that. You should know that you were never – not only – you were wanted very much."

Beloved ineloquent Fingon, &c.

-

They were some miles from the beach when Gil-galad said, “‘Ours’?”

“Yes."

-

I was trying to let the gaps and breaks talk for me in the text. Under-writing.

The beginning was full of these little breaks, too, because they didn't yet know how to talk to each other; now at the end, that connection, and their conversations, are breaking down again. It's echoing that ride together at the beginning very strongly, but now it's not Gil-galad trying to become acquainted and Fingon giving light, unsatisfying answers. These are the real questions/answers at last, and the whole story has really been about getting to the point of Fingon and Gil-galad in Aman where they actually could have the kind of conversation Gil-galad was trying to have at the start.

-

Some miles further, Fingon said, “Did you ever meet him in Beleriand? After I died. I always wondered.”

“No,” Gil-galad said.

It didn’t seem like he was going to speak again, and Fingon had begun to assimilate that knowledge, that pain – that Maedhros had never seen him, had only ever known him through Fingon’s own eyes – when he added,

“But I saw what he did. Have you ever seen a whole city ruined, and known the ruiners to be Elves? It wasn’t even a city, poor Sirion! It was a refuge, a place for the desperate, as far to the West as they could get, as close to the safety of the Sea. They had so very little. No great stone palaces, no towers, no spires. Little enough fresh food. They were able to grow so little, and they lived on fish, and sea-weed, and what brave hunting parties would bring back; and hope. They lived on hope, and they thought Elwing wore it around her throat, but the Valar didn’t come for them: Maedhros Fëanorion and his brothers did instead, and they burned and killed and ravaged. I’d say they salted the earth, but it was salt already. To fall on any innocent Elven city would be a horror: on poor Sirion it was the greatest cruelty I ever saw, and entirely pointless."

They said nothing more.

I like this, too, actually. You see a little here of why Gil-galad might be healthily sceptical of the Valar - they didn't come for them: Maedhros Feanorion and his brothers did instead - and that very post-war experience of seeing a descrated, destroyed town. Worse when you had seen it when it was whole, when you knew the dead and fled.

Sirion is, I think, the worst thing the Feanorions did. I find it worse than even Doriath or Alqualonde (though they're all awful!). These were desperate survivors, huddled together at the edge of the sea for protection. So many of their leaders had been killed or lost. Idril and Tuor had disappeared; Earendil was away; Maedhros and the others struck while only Elwing was there, and she was so young, and so alone, and so damaged already by what they'd done in Doriath. And now they’d come again. There's something about the revictimisation that gets me. It's awful.

I wanted it to be weight and counter-weight - that soft, painful, remembered moment of Maedhros seeing baby Gil-galad through Fingon's eyes, something Fingon has clearly not deliberately thought about since he was reborn, but dredges up now for Gil-galad, because he should know: and which is echoed in the beginning by Fingon's question to Finrod. But Maedhros is still the person who did the things he did, and I wanted to set that soft moment of truth against his deeds at Sirion, another truth, to point out clearly why Gil-galad would recoil so hard from this offering, this honesty Fingon wants to be able to give him. This is the dichotomy at the heart of the story: reconciling Maedhros and how one felt for him with what he did, and how one feels about that. It is irresolvable, at least for Fingon, at least at the moment I've ended it at for now.

I don't know if this is quite what you wanted, @warrioreowynofrohan, especially because like I said, I wrote this story in a frantic fog, but I hope this in some way suffices!