#things that matter lifestyle

[kpoppersblog]

I just found out that my mom has a jewish grandfather who has roots from germany making him as ashkenazi despite being born in the west indies.

since judaism comes from the mom, it doesnt really matter if she got it from her mom or dad does it ?? all that matters is that it comes from the moms side. if the mother has jewish roots from her side then that her kids r jewish. by those means im jewish ????

never knew i was a jew until the age of nearly 17 and I havent celebrated shabbat or read torah, traditions, explored judaism and no nothing, worn a kippah, did hanukkah candles, went to a synagogue (except on my school trip but I was still so young???), and more.

how the fuck like

im in so much shock like you mean to tell me i am a jew all this time ??? and the fact that my uncle explained the judaism line in our family aka his family. like the jewish side comes from my uncle and mom (since they r bothers and sisters since they were both born to my grandma which had my mom so its my moms brother) their side is the German side (ashkenazi) and my moms grandfather (my great grandfather) is a jew from germany. his mother is jewish and the judaism is only in the father’s side all the way to my mom passed my grandma making it my moms side of the family.

like. u mean to tell me. I am jewish ??? JEWISH ???? ALL THIS TIME ???

I asked her yesterday to make me and her do an ancestry test and find out what else is in our tree. I come from an extremely diverse background so I wouldnt be suprised if HALF the generation is a jew up until this point of the grandfather.

the fact it is from the father’s side only ????? like... I AM SO IN SHOCK ???

[discountalien-pancake]

Extremely hot take that many will no doubt have knee-jerk reactions to, but I gotta get it off my chest.

I think people can choose to be queer, and that’s okay.

I think there are people who maybe feel only a tiny incongruity with their contemporary social constructs of attraction and gender, and they could just ignore it and continue on as a Sorta Weird cishet person for the rest of their lives and feel perfectly content. And i think there are some people who feel the same degree of incongruity and lean into and decide that the amount of weird they are is Queer, and that’s what makes them happy! And neither is the “wrong” choice.

I think the impulse to insist it’s not a choice—that all queers are queer because some deep biological, unchangeable factor makes them queer—is totally understandable! I think that it’s understandable to be afraid of conservatives twisting this to mean it’s possible to brainwash people into being queer, and that’s a scary political prospect.

But refusing to acknowledge that queerness can be a choice also feels like a trap. Because queerness acknowledges that queerness can change. Your particular flavor of queer is not immutable. A person who cannot conceive of the same gender even being an option may never consider whether they are attracted to the same gender. An “afab” Weird Lady may just be A Weird Lady, or they could be some flavor of trans—they are they only one who can choose which label they want, and you have no right to tell them they chose the wrong one.

Gender is a construct. Attraction to any gender is attraction to a construct. And everyone’s personal construct is a slight (or extreme!) distortion of “the” socially prescribed construct(s). But what you conceive of as man or woman or nonbinary etc is not going to be exactly the same as what anyone else conceives of as the same genders. It’s rooted in your personal understandings and at most we simply come together to agree that where our definitions overlap, those persons who fit into the overlap must be accepted as that gender. And those constructs are not immutable.

Saying that being queer is not a choice and cannot be a choice is so rigid and stifling, and that’s the opposite of what queerness should be. Queerness is fluid and vast! It is a space where we should be understanding and welcoming of those who choose to embrace us and sympathetic to those who choose not to even if you personally believe certain labels would fit them.

How queer is queer enough? What is the criteria for being queer? What criteria matters? Who gets to decide? Personally, I’m not interested in turning people away because they don’t feel like they were born queer. To me the only criteria that matters is that being queer brings them joy.

And don’t you think that someone who chooses to be queer—who truly wholeheartedly embraces queerness—even when they don’t have to, is someone who loves being queer?

[mohntilyet]

not to mention the entire antaam fleet like 😭 that was the PERFECT moment to show off what the lords could do!!! The antaam fucked over rivain, theyve been a thorn in the whole nations side for a long time now, they would not pass up a chance for payback via full scale naval warfare so that the veilguard can do what they need to!! Sure dreadnoughts are dangerous but at this point they probably have tricks up their sleeve, thats one of the few things they have!

also wouldn't it be personal because does solas not try to blow up kont-aar because he's trying to 5d chess tevinter and the qunari into destroying each other. like. i know technically this would not be incredible widespread news because the attack was stopped, but i don't think the wonderful citizens of kont-aar would have missed the tsunami that nearly hit them and the shockwave that actually hit them. rumors go around. and i assume irian/vadis tell varric. who i think would tell isabela. who would tell the group she leads. who would care because ofc, they LIVE IN RIVAIN, and now know that solas and his followers thinks they can trade rivaini lives* to further his plans.

*while i also think there's probably a divide between kont-aar and the rest of the nation, it's one that the rivaini love to jump across and back over. an interesting comparison to be made here with most of rivain having similar sentiments towards dairsmuid and the chantry. like this is the country specifically mentioned to have a lot of citizens who follow the qun/are non-andrastian + it being MUCH more multicultural and accepting than other nations. any attack on rivain, even if it's a qunari settlement, would fan a lot of flames that solas cannot put out so the idea of trying to him taking multiple steps back because he didn't realise how intensely the qun/rivaini/lords would react is very fun for me. it would have been soo interesting for rivain to be a hub for efforts against solas because of how it's not influenced by andrastianism, how he (or his agents) specifically fucked them over, and (maddeningly for solas) also part of this resistance has spirits who willingly guide them against him. this could have even been a plot device where the door goes both ways and solas finds out rook's plans because he manages to eavesdrop through a seer or something.

and on the spirits. all the stuff where the mourn watch regularly communicates with spirits could have been done with rivain as well, and with different takes on being 'friendly' with spirits. iirc there's a spirit in the hall of valor which is so interesting but it's literally just there for flavour text. THERE'S A SPIRIT IN THE HALL OF VALOR THAT DOES NOTHING BESIDES LIKE. SAY HI. ??? bioware i would have liked to see more spirits and seers and the matriarchal pantheists you have talked about please. and also the idea of the peaceful qunari settlement being pushed to protect the country they are part of and what that means for them as qunari vs. rivaini. taash's storyline could have contributed to this . so A LOT less about choosing a side, more about how kont-aar has developed, changed, how rivain has influenced it and what it means to be qunari. not the qunari agents and fighters that we have seen, but their 'civillian' way of life in kont-aar.

complete waste not seeing any of established lore reflected in the lords of fortune or rivain because i stupidly actually thought we were going to see some kind of settlement and be introduced to a very different cultural norms.. in my beautiful mind i like to think taash is a little taken aback by how badly mages/elves/etc are treated. like they understood it was different outside of rivain (they would have been young when the dairsmuid circle annulment happened right? so they don't 'remember' it themself, they likely heard others talking about it when they're old enough to understand) but until they actually saw what was happening first hand, they had a weird dissonance about it. but what we got was a deserted beach, ties to another faction (wardens are fine!! they are great !!!! the fourth blight is interesting!!!! yet they are not the faction with a lack of info about them!!!!!) and also the hall of valor that exists as flavor text with nothing meaningful behind it besides a pub used in a few cutscenes and a minigame.

[chirpsythismorning]

Watching Wayward Pines for potential ST5 inspo bc the Duffers wrote a couple episodes in s1, and when I got to their second (last) episode and their name crossed the screen, I noticed a visual parallel that might already exist on the show…

Recognize it??

It instantly reminded me of that last shot for the opening of s3, with the landscape peaking out behind the Russian base. But when I went back and actually compared the two, holy shit it’s near identical, and not just the landscape.

I didn’t even remember the helicopter being there on the left, not to mention the pillar-esaue contraption at the center. Like… they’re the same picture.!

With them being credited right at that moment, it’s obvious this was an intentional nod to their previous work.

I just thought it was cool so I wanted to share, but in terms of my watch overall, there is a LOT going on that they could pull from. I’m only halfway through s1, though I’ve heard the show goes downhill in s2 so we’ll see how that goes 😂

[messynchic]

[moondharse]

Looking back at the "severe" social anxiety diagnosis I got as a teen ..

It's like, if I went to a therapist and said: "I do not like being stabbed with knives. I do activly avoid situations that involve me being stabbed with knives. When I have to face a situation where I can expect to be stabbed with knives, I dread it and can sometimes not bring myself to pull through, no matter how much I want to reap the benefit I am after, that requires the situation."

And the therapist went: "Oh, so you're irrationally afraid of people. Got it."

[cowboyhatesithere]

never thought I’d be in a position of relating to former Drake or Kanye fans, but I do want to now take the time to clarify that Neil Gaiman being one of my most read authors for the last two years came from reading his work only prior to the news coming out about him now 🥴

[tearlessrain]

I do lowkey love both oriental shorthairs and bengals I just can't personally justify buying a purebred cat when the local shelter is constantly full of them.

[feralsneeze]

Not sneeze just mental health rambling in the tags

[rainyfestivalsweets]

Mmk, that felt super whiny.

Time to reframe.

What can I do today to feel better?

How about some low effort things?

Dress in workout clothes.

Stand at my desk.

Get some steps in.

Workout.

Yes, it is cold out but that doesn't mean thw work stops.

What can I do today to make my mindset better?

Podcast? Book?

I know part of it is body dysmorphia.... my weight loss is extreme, but I still have a donut around my middle. Some extra skin maybe but there still seems to be alot of fat with it. Makes me look like I have a front butt.

Fuck it. Who cares, keep going.

[crypt1dcorv1dae]

Metalheads who don't like/respect Babymetal bc their "look" isn't, what? Traditionally metal? are so cringe. Like bro it's an alternative music scene we're supposed to say FUCK tradition????? What's wrong w y'all... Embarrassing

And also they are missing out bc Babymetal fucking rules

[hell0mega]

the thing about bigotry is that the basic rhetoric is that the bigot just doesn't want that type of person to exist. and a lot of them will swear up and down that they don't want them to die, they just don't want them to exist in the way that they do. if gay people wanted their respect, they'd stop doing x y z. if black people wanted their respect, they'd stop being like x y z. if houseless people wanted their respect, they'd only have to do x y z. but none of that is true. members of those groups could follow all of their rules and expectations but they'd still be part of the group they hate. you can't stop being from a country they dislike, you can't stop being disabled, you shouldn't have to stop being of your faith. so then what's the solution? those people not existing in the first place.

THIS is why you cannot tolerate intolerance. bigotry is inherently violent.

[meownotgood]

Do you think you’ll ever grow out of your Aki phase

never

[variksel]

nah its weird being in your early 20s, being surrounded by friends going thru some sort of early adulthood crises and "holy fuck im never gonna amount to anything im already 21, im never gonna be making money im never gonna be famous" -thoughts when like. all of the media you consume is by people who are well into their 30s and often, 40s

like i feel like im so chill about this partly because i feel like if this random mid class guy who got famous for the first time off of a podcast he started at 35 after working restaurant and retail jobs ........ anythin can happen u can do new shit after 27 girl

[thechloup]

🔥HOT🥵MESS🔥

💜

[llycaons]

'this is a goddamn bitch of an unsatisfactory situation' sounds like the kind of exaggerated, colorful complaint that I associate with like, modern-day internet humor, but when hear see it in context it's completely different. jack's voice is breaking, he's holding back tears. the pain in his delivery of that line is starkly audible. this is at the end of nearly two decades of seeing ennis only a few times a year, and just hearing that ennis has to cancel their next meeting. he's at the end of his rope, and he's ready to break down. as much attention as "I wish I knew how to quit you" got, I think this is the line that stays with me for the sheer emotion in its delivery