#idk rant over peace out

[feralsneeze]

Not sneeze just mental health rambling in the tags

[jacksmusesdrv3]

I know I've twisted myself into a goddamn pretzel the past five or so years trying not to be 'too much' and backing off when I am

but

A good deal of why I started the #dr literacy tag is precisely because of this- I am beyond tired and fed up, with the kinds of things that people have ignored and left on my back- whether it's to do with Kokichi, or V3 overall. It's easy to deflect and call me 'delusional', and five years later never even consider the implications of having called me that over what I've been trying to grapple with, much less apologise to me sincerely and genuinely try to understand where I'm coming from and why it's so hard to discuss in the first place- not to mention why it's so easy to make mistakes not least because the way Kodaka plays with themes can be decidedly insensitive (and I was clearly out of my depth with that when I started this blog)

This isn't about all of you. A good number of people here have been wonderful about this, even if they don't understand all too well. But frankly such people are the exception rather than the rule, and the rule is that people don't bother to interrogate their own biases about Kokichi, or really grapple with the way him and V3's narrative might be constructed with bias. And this unwillingness to accept ambiguity and nuance results in some genuinely hurtful behaviour towards people who try to point out that, maybe, not everything was even his fault, or that his character and situation is far more layered than it appears on a first run of the game. Or even a second, or third.

So I'm gonna need people in that camp to swear that you'll do better about this going forward. No really. This situation I've been in didn't come out of nowhere, and while I've beaten the proverbial horse to death that I haven't always been fair or reasonable either, that does not mean I should just back myself into a wall and take the status quo that is 'Tsumugi is telling the truth and Kokichi is just a clown' as a 'fact of canon'. Because there's a very good chance that that might not even be true, and that there's even more tangled messes Kodaka left in the text to unpack that you never even thought of, and that really NEED extra care and nuance to fully understand.

I know you're probably sick of hearing this from me by now. But this is an issue that can never be helped until it's faced head on, and the effect of basically being pathologised over it (due to *checks notes* autism), is seriously damaging- the inability of people to address things as serious issues and themes rather than 'just the pet theory that came out of my nutty head', is something I cannot, on principle, force myself to accept. So please just think about the way you're approaching issues in the future. I will try to do the same.

[tanicus-caesareth]

guarana drama, damage control

[f1owermoon]

sorry i just. need to rant for a second

[wings-of-flying]

could i, an eighteen year old with zero experience running a d&d podcast and a patreon for said podcast, do better than the council who've had several years of experience and amassed a fan base who so willingly offer (sometimes constructive) criticism on all that's not working? well i don't know, because i don't have the resources or time or energy for a project like that, but i do still understand that their current system isn't working

[epsilontauri]

hold up you know what i’m mad as hell.

[its-hell]

IM A CHANGED WOMAN OH MY GOD I CANT BELIEVE I JUST SAW HOZIER LIVE AHAHAHSHSHSJJEHWNSJWN

[oh-cramity-its-amity]

its so weird to read some of my old fics (do NOT do it but i'm just being hypothetical rn) and reading it. like who even was this person?? i completely was in a haze back in 2020. i literally was posting 3 chapters a day. A DAY. what in the WORLD was that shit.

anyway i remembered some STUPID sappy shit and i didnt remember if i'd put it into a fic or not BUT I FOUND IT.

She and Hope had been dating in secret for months anyway, and any attempt to go talk to Ryan only filed her disposition of displeasure upon knowing that she couldn’t tell anyone, Molly especially, it destroyed herself mentally. They couldn’t really go anywhere near the school, always having to lie to everyone about having projects together when Molly wasn’t around them. It’d consisted with 9 PM - 2 AM intervals of being able to actually see each other. Hope would sneak through her small bedroom window with a portable record player and whatever she had gotten from the vintage record store downtown, and Amy would always fall asleep around eleven because of her internal clock. She would always wake up to find a single sticky note stuck on the edge of her desk whenever she woke up to her alarm the next morning. One of them, Amy still had tucked inside of her phone case, a heavily detailed human heart, with blue and red ink sketched onto a neon pink sticky note, there was a caption that headed the small paper reading the phrase over every now and again makes her almost melt every time. “You have my heart.”

yeah idk why the fuck but i thought of this fucking idea again today and i was like "omg did i ever put that heart note thing in a fic???" yeah you fucking did.

all that to say ME AND WHO???? imagine. thats so fucking.... RAHHHH.

[picklesthenonbeanary]

running low on tagged drafts, gonna need to make some more or actually finish the ones I’ve already got started, oop-

I feel like I’m making empty promises on my Au, it exists I just have been getting distracted and also life is getting in the way a bit. I’m gonna finish my rant eventually my brain just has to actually cooperate with me on it, agh!

[dmumt]

genuine question is having a flatmate ever a pleasant experience

[cpyclopse]

I just got home from watching the fnaf movie and its actually so good! I really like the story they gave the characters. They did a good job with william afton too he was actually scary(i saw enough shaggy edits to ruin the illusion of scaryness) in a real serial killer way. It was kinda scary but like it was ok- no horrifying jump scares more of a cut to another scene while implying what happened. I was worried about it my horror movie tolerance has dropped dramatically from when i was a little kid.

Also Matpats "just a theory" bit was so funny god- the ending song LAMO i was not expecting that but it was actually a great inclusion. 100/10 movie

[femmeroll]

are you guys sick of older!sevika yet or what…

sevika x fem reader

cw: age gap, modern setting, sfw & nsfw, idk this is just feeding my delusions

older!sevika will always give you a ride. in fact, the thought of you having to drive yourself anywhere makes her sad. you’re a princess who deserves to be chauffeured around!

she’ll pick you up in her truck from your college classes with your favorite drink from dunkin in the cupholder. she’ll wake up at seven in the morning just so she can drive you to your eight A.M class.

“babe, it’s your day off. you need to rest, i can drive myself!”

“is that some sort of joke? get in the truck.”

older!sevika is physically incapable of watching a movie with you without falling asleep. the second her ass hits the couch in your apartment, it’s like she swallowed ten melatonin gummies.

you guys are cuddling up under a blanket, peacefully enjoying some movie you found after scrolling through disney plus for ten minutes. around fifteen minutes into the movie, you turn to see her eyes closed, softly snoring against the pillow.

“sevi…c’mon, wake up. it’s been like…thirty seconds.”

she stirs awake with a groan. “i’m awake, i’m awake. i won’t pass out again, promise.”

she falls back asleep twenty minutes later.

older!sevika is, contrary to popular belief, a huge fan of romantic sex. she hates quickies, they just don’t satisfy her need to be intimate with you in every sense of the word.

she loves to take her sweet time with you. making out turns to gentle grinding on her lap, which then turns to neck bites and soft rubs on your hardened nipples. she won’t touch your cunt until she’s positive that you’re dripping with need. everything with sevika is an expression of her love. every deep thrust of her strap into your pussy is filled with sweetness and appreciation for you.

during aftercare, she’ll do whatever you ask. she’ll rub your back, get you water, feed you, clean you up in the bath. the whole time she’s mumbling praises in your ear about how much she loves you.

and on that note…

older!sevika gets turned on by the most random things. wearing her shirt? she’s ripping it off and getting on her knees for you. doing work with a concentrated look on your face? she’s blushing down to her neck. singing along to a song in the car? she’s pulling over and tonguing you down.

“babe…i’m studying for midterms. what are you kissing my neck for?”

“you’re so hot when you’re focused. i think it’s time for a break, baby girl.”

older!sevika starts facetiming you during her lunch at the office. she’ll listen to you talk about your classes or your outfit or the weather for the entire hour she has free. the whole reason she calls you every day is so she can hear your voice and look at your gorgeous face.

she’ll have her phone propped up against a stack of papers on her desk, staring at you through the screen with hearts in her eyes like a cartoon character. nodding mindlessly as whatever you need to rant about, completely at peace due to the sound of you.

older!sevika smokes a concerning amount of cigs, just like in the canon universe. between clients at work? she’s going out back to smoke. after sex? she’s smoking in bed. driving you somewhere? she’s smoking in the car with the window rolled down. she’s literally always coughing.

that being said, she thinks vaping is just ridiculous. she just thinks it’s lame. if you vape (like me), she’ll make the most dramatic, grossed out face the second you pull it out. it smells too sweet, and they’re like forty bucks a piece.

she will absolutely buy you a new one when she’s out getting herself cigarettes, though. she can’t say no to you ever.

[deosilplanarglitches]

Reason #345734 why I don't tell my mom shit.

Her pain and suffering is the only kind she cares about, and she'll play stupid games with me like ghost me for 3+ weeks after a minor surgery, just to make sure I'm worried enough about her life to check, so she "has permission" to start in with the talking my ear off about her problems without boundaries or preamble. She won't know shit about my issues til after they're over (if she hears about them at all) bc she never asks a damn thing about my life, and literally only ever leaves room for herself and her feelings in any equation literally ever and then peaces tf out like. Bitch I'm permanently disabled and in a degenerative spiral that's gonna last my whole fkn life, and you're still bitching about yourself? Wanting me to cater to your emotions when you haven't even spared a CRUMB of consideration in return?

FUck all the way off.

Should have known that if she had died or sth bad happened, I'd have heard something right away. After 30+ yrs of her pulling the "yeah my kid tried to kill themself for the 7th time, but have you asked ME how hard it is to raise them doing the nothing I have been, bc I still don't know them as a person at all or even try to? Where's the compassion?!" shit... you'd think I would know better, but my compassion gets me fucked over YET AGAIN.

If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty.

Back to no contact.

Let the bitch suffocate if she can't self soothe.

[yoyomomiko]

WHAT ARE UR HEADCANONS 4 DAISUKE X READER??????

Pairings: Daisuke x F!reader

Warnings: a lil cringe, maybe some cursing, not proofread, probably contains grammar mistakes, ENGLISH isn't my first language!!

(A/N): OMG I LOVE DAISUKE😍😍 ANYWAYS THIS IS KINDA SHORT AND RUSHED BECAUSE I WAS EXCITED TO WRITE THIS I'M SO SORRY👉👈 -> m.list

★CRUSHING/CONFESSION

Hear me out, you fell first he fell harder.

I am very confident that at first he didn't even realize he himself had a crush on you... Like, he wanted to make you laugh more than he wanted to to the others, he always wanted to help you and be there for you... So, he pieced two and two together, and figured out that he actually was in love with you.

If he were to tell someone (probably not) it would OFCCC be our nice old man Swansea☺️

You see, Daisuke is very... Uhm, an idiot, so he won't understand when you're flirting with him. That's just him, he's too dense. You have to speak up, or else he won't pick up.

He always cracks jokes around you just to try and make you laugh😀

But like, it's so obvious he likes you

He's following you like a lost puppy, eager to please you in ANY way.

He's crushing on you so hard...

You kinda notice it since he just helps you with everything, offering help with your chores or just anything in general.

HE THINKS HE'S HIDING IT SOOO WELL BUT IN REALITY AT LEAST SOMEBODY CAUGHT UP TO IT (probably Swansea duh)

Let's say he's the one to confess first...

He would do it on accident for SURE. Do what you will with that information, let your imagination get ahead of you😍 (I'm actually lazy that's why I didn't write it but yeah whatever sue ME)

So then, he realizes what he said and then you also confess and BOOM, he's all over you. Good luck trying to get rid of him (who tf would do that🤨)

★DURING THE RELATIONSHIP

This man will go show you off the moment you two have an established relationship (unless you don't wanna)

RANTS TO SWANSEA ABOUT YOU

No but fr Swansea's probably tired of hearing him babble about you, he seriously had to force him to shut up just for a small moment of peace. BUT he secretly likes the fact that Daisuke is happy so like🤭

Daisuke is a really energetic guy so I feel like if you match his vibe he's never gonna let you go

LISTEN TO MEEE, he loves both physical affection AND words of affirmation, he's big on BOTH.

If he could, he would hold your hand forever, NEVER would he let go of you. He wants to hold you, close, for as long as possible.

If you decide at some point to sleep in the same bed, you will get cuddles every single night.

Big spoon or little spoon, he doesn't care. Just TOUCH him, in ANY way, he doesn't care and doesn't mind just do it!!

OMG PRAISE HIM

He always searches for your compliments, just PRAISE HIM please, tell him you're proud of him or something IDKKKK

"Did I do good?" "I'm doing great, right?"

UGH if there's something he loves most about you (he would kiss every inch of your body but whatevs) it's definetly your laugh.

Okay, maybe it's the way you praise him at the end of each day.

Okay, no, MAYBE it's the way you play with his hair while he slowly drifts to sleep from your soothing touch.

Okay, maybe he just loves you wholeheartedly and would do anything for you (he's whipped)

I imagine that he seeks out for head pats. Just pat his head. Pet him or sum idk ask him.

While in bed, he definitely headbutts your palm just to let you know what he wants. Cause like at first he just nudges you but if you don't get the hint, he'll straight up headbutt your hand (I saw someone say this and I love you for that)

CALL HIM A GOOD BOY UGHHH

Lowkey imagine if you called him a good boy tho that's crazy

I have to say that I think Daisuke, as much of a dumbass as he is, listens very well.

He's surprisingly very good at comforting you

He might now understand you, but he listens, and tries his best

TELL HIM YOU'RE PROUD OF HIM OMG

He's gonna find cheesy nicknames for you so buckle up >⁠.⁠<

Daisuke LOVES kissing you, there, I said it.

Whether it's a small peck on the cheek or a full on make out session, he's gonna enjoy it and THANK you.

He sometimes wonders how he pulled you ngl🤨

If like, some sort of small argument got in between you, he'll be apologizing on his knees and begging you to forgive him with snot running down

Imagine you called him a good boy that'd lowkey be crazy

If you somehow ever decide to wear a piece of clothing that belongs to him, it WILL be yours.

He's gonna squeal like a school girl and compliment youuu

Overall 10/10 boyfriend. He's sweet, charismatic, energetic, a bit of an airhead, kisses the ground you walk on, and bonus for being handsome.

★yoyomiko ★miko

[tevanbuckley]

some low points from the ry*an g*zman interview because i need you all to feel my pain.

when talking about his celibacy (yes he uses that word): "I haven't entertained any interactions with any other females" — gave me the ick 0/10

uses the phrase "a woman's touch," to explain why women are inherently good at interior decorating(?) and that this skill is how women are able to enrich a successful man's life — side note: at no point do they talk about how men enrich women’s lives.

immediately after this the religious imagery takes a left turn and exits my frame of reference, bc instead of just asking "do you think you still have things to work on?" like a normal person, the host says "I want to know what one Thorn is in your flesh." — someone raised more religious than i was needs to chime in on if this is normal christian doctrine or a sign he might be in a cult. (is it a reference to the thorns in jesus' crown?)

ryan makes a weird comment about how "you've seen civilizations built on [a man in love]" — genuinely idk what the fuck this means — but it leads into a tangent about like, men as providers and how "I would do anything for my women."

"peace is key yeah we got enough problems in the world outside the house and so long as I come back to the house and I get peace," — maybe i'm being pedantic but the way he keeps framing woman as belonging in the home is 🚩🚩🚩🚩

"for the next woman I would have in my life I can see that they navigate their their problems and still offer peace to their men." — again 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

surprisingly claims he has been to therapy, which assuming is true, idk it worked.

the host: "women may be fighting internal battles you know kind of themselves do you believe that a woman still fighting those battles are able to still bring peace" — because remember ladies, no matter what you're going through your job is to bring peace to your man's home.

there's some more brief gender essentialist bs where ryan talks about how men "like to fix things," but are bad listeners, and how "problems within women are so specific to women that I wouldn't even try and and say that I have a grasp on them."

then the host randomly asks him if he thinks men need to be financially stable before entering a relationship or if dating a broke guy is a way to "present loyalty."

weirdly ryan actually kind of dodges this question, but ends up suggesting social media is a good place to get "great examples of what does and what doesn't seem to work." in relationships — and no. no it isn't.

oh and then he starts talking about conor mcgregor for some reason? and how it's bad he disrespected his wife by stepping outside their marriage — and i mean sure, although infidelity feels second to the rape accusations??

says it's harder for a woman to come into a man's life when he's already established because "now the man has proven to himself that he never needed a woman." — which, interesting given how later he talks about how women need to stop trying to do the independent woman thing.

he also gets weirdly possessive over his daughter at one point. does the classic "God forbid I find out that man disrespects my little baby." — idk, on the surface he talks about how he wants her to know her value, but it seems like he has a pretty limited view of what that value is.

the host drops lore about how she moved out of her parents house at 14/15 and how she had to "stop thinking like a woman and start thinking also like a man," but stay feminine and "know what a man wants and how to cater to that but also still be soft." — i mean good lord, i don't even know where to start 🤢.

this btw is the preamble to ryan's rant about "independent women."

and god the more i read the more i am deeply concerned about the woman hosting (i saw someone earlier say she's 21). this woman is barely an adult and has so much internalised misogyny, talking about how "us women don't know how to direct our emotions." and "in today's generation a lot of men are deprived of even the small things because a lot of women are takers."

this whole interview is utterly bizarre and i feel like it's taken years off my life. like i said earlier, this isn't a normal podcast he got weird on, this is straight up christian propaganda

[chkrschss]

SQH Fanfic Concept

SQH kinda angst fanfic where he feels completely out of place with the Peak Lords. Then he goes to the Demon Realm and feels additionally out of place. Especially with LBH, MBJ, and Sha Hualing.

So he decides to start periodically fucking off to different places in small outings. Just little few day trips. And he begins building it into his schedule. So people think he’s somewhere else. And NO ONE CATCHES ON. For months, even maybe a few years. He’d disappear on an excursion once every other month, then every month, then every week. He ends up developing a pseudo-identity. He’s actually enjoying it. And visits different people in smaller villages. And at some point, he decides to maybe leave for longer.

The person who actually notices after a long time is Mobei Jun. SQH had enlisted some demons and disciples to shoulder his responsibilities while he’s gone and finally MBJ noticed a small error/tick or whatever that SQH would never do. And he raises the alarm. Even the Peak Lords panic. They begin searching for SQH but home dawg is currently starting on a 2 week adventure.

SQH is eventually found after people who met SQH’s pseudo-identity point MBJ and the others to him. He’s prolly like vibing in a lovely little cottage that he’s renovated as homebase. Maybe even developed some talismans or smthing to teleport there. MBJ finds him like…. Idk watering w garden or smthing. He’s outside. And SQH is so at peace and is smiling n shit m. MBJ is shocked. He never thought SQH could even make a face like that.

Maybe SQH finds a kid who is a lil rascal but is overprotective of him. Maybe jokingly calls him A-Niang. People kind of know that SQH is lying about who he is but they’ve been assuming it’s because of some shit. They want to protective SQH. An elderly woman berated MBJ “for scaring his husband away”. She rants about SQH being a catch and MBJ is a fool for not paying attention. “Happy wife. Happy life. Yknow?” MBJ is confused but it turns out that SQH starts gushing about him whenever he’s too tired or drunk. So everyone can tell who he is in the village. The old woman demands that he woos SQH back.

Cue a whole redemption arc of MBJ paying attention to him. MBJ actually writes a letter formally berating the Peak Lords and especially SQQ who was suppose to be SQH bff. He starts defending SQH as SQH remains oblivious.

On SQH’s side, he was fuming. He just wanted peace. He wanted to be left alone. The kid he’s been watching over is asking about MBJ. He tells the kids that MBJ is his boss that he thought wouldn’t notice him gone. The kid hugs and says something along the lines of “Well SQH is so cool he can’t be forgettable and those who forget him as dumbasses” which makes SQH laugh.

Timeskip occurs and SQH’s two week trip has now lasted three. He’s kind of gotten used to MBJ helping him. At one emotionally charged moment, he cups MBJ’s face in his hands and has the urge to just kiss his king for being so silly. The kid noticed how MBJ’s actions mirror someone courting another. The old lady tells tum it’s because MBJ is courting SQH. The kid snarks about how SQH doesn’t even reciprocate but the old lady misses that he doesn’t even realize what MBJ is doing.

(Note: this is where I stopped rambling but indulgent concept for myself lol)