#things are so difficult right now
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Last week, I was unexpectedly laid off from my dream job. Unfortunately, I still haven’t been paid for the last month of work plus some reimbursements that the company still owes me, which has left me very tight on money. And I need to pay rent.
So I’m available to work ASAP, whether it��s freelance or full time. You can see more of my work on my website: www.lesliestrock.com.
I have 12 years of experience doing character design and illustration work. I have a diverse background and an even more diverse skill set. I’ve created art for animated series, comics, games, and apps. I’ve also worked on puppets and costumes for theme parks around the world.
I’m not picky about what the next step in my professional career is. I just need to find good work as soon as possible.
So please help me out and spread the word. Maybe reach out to anyone you know in the studios to see if they have any positions available right now. Anything helps. Thank you!! 💖
#things are so difficult right now#freelance#digital#artists of tumblr#illustration#art#character design#sketch#zombies run#zr#painting#runner 5#how to train your dragon#sam yao#mermaid#centaur#kingdom hearts
235 notes
·
View notes
Text
Let’s pull up that improvement chart again shall we …
#sans#undertale#Im in a frustration period right now#I’ve wired my brain to enjoy the process of learning to draw difficult things#So it’s just a period of feeling a mild lack of a sense of self w my art
994 notes
·
View notes
Text
New Leokumi content in the lords year of 2024?? It's more likely than you think! (x)
#I gotta say its been so so nice to go back to something I was passionate about as a teen#its hard to describe#a sense of coming home almost#'Hey I know you and hey I can see my younger self in the way I react to this and that'#fates? People would stone you if you said you liked that thing ten years back#now im an adult and I write 160k words about leokumi#idk dude#being an adult is difficult but being unapologetic and knowing you have every right to do so is just so cathartic#Hah never thought id go back to fates one day and be nostalgic would you look at that#im glad im alive actually#leokumi#fire emblem#fe#fire emblem takumi#fire emblem leo#fire emblem fates#fire emblem if#fire emblem fanfiction#fire emblem camilla#look she deserves the tag FEH loves her for her#Personality#my art
111 notes
·
View notes
Text
So every year my company has a huge conference where we all come together and go to different presentations and stuff. That’s the boring part. The FUN part is getting to talk to everyone and drink and party and listen to the higher ups talk about their experiences which always ends up being super inspirational.
Long story short they had a discussion about like. Taking chances and getting involved in things you want to be involved in even if it means changing positions in the company. And y’all know how much I fucking HATE my current job lol and while I have been searching for work outside of this company I haven’t had much luck (very competitive field + not a lot of open jobs that suit my experience + half the jobs in my field getting taken over by AI, etc etc). But!! While it’s not EXACTLY what I want to do with my life there is a position in this company that definitely has a more creative and artistic side. And that’s marketing. And there’s one (1) guy handling marketing for our entire company and he offhandedly mentioned to me a few weeks back about how he’s looking for help—and he went straight to me in particular bc he knows I have a background in art and design and stuff like that.
So being ✨ inspired ✨ by the conference I stepped wayyyy outside my comfort zone and worked up the nerve to tell him hey I’m interested in what you do and I know you mentioned you might need help and I’d frankly love to help. And he was SUPER excited lol I mean we’ve been friends for a while and he’s literally the friendliest and most extroverted person I’ve ever met. Things are already moving so quickly lmao he’s talked to my boss and his boss about getting me into marketing so I’ll be able to do things like. Photography! And video editing! And web design! And swag design! And lots of creative things!! And I’m very excited!! Bc I’ve felt so fucking stifled at my current job bc it’s just. Very opposite of a creative type job and while I do appreciate my teammates I just. Don’t want to be there anymore.
So I saw the opportunity and I was like. Clearly looking for other jobs is not working rn so you know, maybe marketing isn’t something I want to do forever, but it’ll at least give me more experience in my field if I do end up finding a job elsewhere. You know? And if I do this I won’t be absolutely miserable every single day doing something I don’t care about and don’t love doing. So.
Anyway long story short I might be getting a new position soon and I’m VERY excited and jazzed and grateful to finally get to have a job that I’ll actually enjoy doing. And I wanted to share. :))))
#AND I can negotiate a better salary bc they’re paying me like shit right now lmao#I’m excited. I’m very excited#And I could tell that our marketing guy was super hyped when I mentioned wanting to help I think he’s been wanting to steal me for a while#😂😂😂#My mom was very proud of me for speaking up too#It’s very hard for me to do things like this. I’m super introverted and talking to people is difficult#Let alone being like hey. I want to work for you. Putting myself out there is NOT easy#And my boss was proud of me too#AAAA. AAGFHDHFH. I’M SO#I’m very jittery 😂#But very happy. Eeee!!#Shima speaks#Finally getting to do fun stuff that I like doing. You know?#Long post
63 notes
·
View notes
Text
kremy nation help me kremy nation i am. very. indecisive
#i did buy baldurs gate 3 recently………..my wallet is screaming and shaking and quaking in true raw fear right now#I WANT ONE SO BAD BUT..#i mean it’s not /that/ much money……………..#but i just. hmgdhrgnr#there are two wolves inside me: one wants every cool little internet thing i can buy and the other is so cheap it won’t buy anything $20+#they are currently locked in a very homoerotic battle#ITS FORTY FIVE DOLLARSSSS AGH#man.#it’s a friday morning and apparently the vibe is “despair over two equally difficult choices”#legends of avantris#once upon a witchlight#not art#kremy nation#kremy lecroux#morning frost#ouaw plushies
35 notes
·
View notes
Text
parents of disabled kids will be like “we know our kid is disabled but we just won’t tell them about it. we don’t want them to think they’re less valuable than other kids. we don’t want them to feel limited by their disability, we want them to know they’re capable of anything.”
meanwhile those kids are growing up thinking “why is everything so much harder for me than it is for everyone else? there’s no reason i shouldn’t be able to just do this. i guess i’m just a failed, broken person.”
#text post#ableism#like if you don’t want to get your kid diagnosed with something then that’s one thing#but not KNOWING what’s wrong with them isn’t gonna make the problem just magically disappear#and just personally speaking. SO MANY things i do that i used to feel such deep shame about?#i now realize they were because i’m autistic#the meltdowns the social awkwardness etc#and i feel so much better to know i wasn’t just being whiny or difficult or weird for no reason#i feel like my whole life i’ve been gaslighted into not knowing what i really feel#because everyone always told me i was being ‘dramatic’ or ‘too sensitive’ and eventually i decided they must be right#so now i literally can’t tell what i’m feeling sometimes#because i dismiss my own feelings as stupid and wrong
111 notes
·
View notes
Text
OH ARTHUR BENNETT.. such a gorgeous and intriguing character. terribly burdened by a GRUESOME set of crimes, his light suffocated by a HEAVY century of GUILT. so tragic, so dark and broody, and yet PAINFULLY awkward in any social setting ever
#jrwi fanart#cw blood#jrwi show#jrwi suckening#arthur bennett#OUHH THIS ONE WAS SITTING IN MY WIPS FOR SO LOOOONGwhen i took it out there was mould on it :sob:#BUT i think i was able to fix it up okay#i keep seeing SO MANY MISTAKES RRAAAHHH BUT YOU DONT SEE THEM RIGHT?? THATS ONLY ME. RIGHT?? EXACTLY.#THE KEY IS TO SAY. AND REPEAT AFTER ME. 'FUUUCK IT WE BALL#so anyway. arthur bennett huh? grizzly says that arthur is reaal fuckin difficult to play. and i SUPER get that. i mean LOOK AT HIM..#grizz often needs a minute to think abt what hes gonna say in a way that matches w that Stoic Personality. which is FAIR but also that#ends up making way for awkward confrontations like: the lady in the parky lot. he took too long to answer and scared her away.& I LOVE THAT#arthur is tragic and sad and cool and stoic but hes ALSO awkward and silly and kinda dumb and short sighted. HE HAS COMPLEXITIES#I LOVE WHEN TTRPG CHARACTERS HAVE A GOOD SET OF SHORTCOMINGS. ESPECIALLY WHEN U FIND THEM ONLY AS U PLAY THEM.#I COULd go on and on saying the same things w different words abt arthurs intriguing and entertaining character but i shall spare u. for no#ILL ALSO MENTION HOW MUCH I LOVE HIS FLAVOR THO.. I LOVE TALL HOT BOY WHOS ONE W THE DARKNESS.. I REMEMBER WHEN HE FIRST MENTIONED THE#BADLUCK. N I WAS LIKE OOOHH THATS WHY HIS DESIGN IS SO COOL N CHAOTIC N ASYMMETRICAL. HES UNLUCKY!!! i love love love his design so much...#GRaaauruguguraguhhghghgh what else what else is there for me to spew on abt...i think im reachin a limit here..OH MAGNUS. i hope that#we get to know more abt how magnus and arthur met.. like How they became besties... ouuhh... I ALSO WANNA KNOW MORE ABT MARY DAVIS. LIKEHOW#he also apparently spent alotta time in a zone dominated by edward twilight? all he remembers is constant partying? I WANNA KNOW MORE..#i think i got room 4 one more ramble SO. THE ART PIECE.as i said its gone a lil stale BUT. im still very proud o the bits where hes allScar#I WANNA SEE HIM GET SCARYMORE. I like the idea of shadows solidifying to make him strange and eerie.like TEETH n CLAWS n SPINES n YESS#also the SILVER EYES.no1 does silver eyes like the show Claymore. they make em look so striking and eerie...i also like to think that#human arthur had deep beautiful brown eyes.just in my beaitufl heart.i mean look at him..i wanna cook him n eat him.ANYWAY#i think thats all my ramblin for this piece. now i gotta go cancel a single day i had ata hotel bc my work schedule change last minute FUCK#feel free to ramble in my tags aswell tho i read all of them and i chew on thenm and i love them so sos os mcuh
146 notes
·
View notes
Text
starting to think that maybe it's a good idea to stop forcing myself to create and take a break actually
#i really want to make something. i don't feel good not working on things. i don't feel good just watching videos all day#but i think i need that right now haha#it's so difficult to do anything and it's impossible to enjoy it#and trying to work in another medium doesn't help either#i just need to rest#i just need to be nice to myself and think my little thoughts and rewatch hbomb and gabi belle for a thousandth time#and talk to people i like and treat myself to an occasional sweet#this does mean spending time away from the creative side of fandom because i do get a little jealous of people who can create still#i want to appreciate others' art but i need to be in a better headspace for it#so i'm just taking my time#i will still be opening commissions later this week because maybe money will be enough of an incentive for me to get to work#and i just really really need the money haha#and i need to promote my stuff in certain places and i need to have my comms open for that#but even then I'll try to take it easy#either way i love you all and i appreciate that even when i don't have anything to give people choose to be kind to me#i promise I'll repay you. even those who just donated money to me. if only a fraction of it but I'll give back i swear
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
i have been listening to quite a bit of U2 today and now the age old question of "which member is actually my fave?" has resurfaced
#text#i really like all of them#though i never had a particularly strong Thing for larry (im sorry larry)#larry is the backbone of who they are and i really appreciate him a lot#and i love his attitude#but right now i am kinda going back and forth between edge and adam#i think adam is my current fave because he is just so chill#he has such a natural elegance to him#and he is such a gentleman#he also came up to me after i played on stage with them and was shaking like a leaf the moment adrenalin kicked my butt#and he told me that i did great and reassured me with his gentle aura and we hugged#i just really love the balanced at peace energy he has#edge is the sonic architect of the band!!!!#and i just think he is So Incredibly funny#(and he was also kind by teaching me the chords 😭)#bono is just.....#he is A Lot and loving him is like trying to idk stand in the middle of hurricane winds#it can be difficult to hold onto him without needing a bit of a breather every now and then#but he is very loveable and he has his heart in the right place#even if the execution is not always... great#and i have never met someone who could read people so well as he can#and i love how he uses that to just give everyone memorable experiences#such a natural showman and people person i suppose#he can center you out in a crowd of dozens of people screaming for his attention and give you that personal moment#... yeah im having U2 feelings#not in the way that i feel an intense moment of hyperfixation on them brewing#it mostly feels like visiting an old friend
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
im really normal about them <- lie
#ace attorney#mia fey#diego armando#miego#lorillee.png#THATS RIGHT BABY. AFTER -um . hold on. *checks notes* - SIX MONTHS. LORILLEE IS BACK WITH PHOTOSHOP ART 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥#every now and again i like to put effort into something just to remind everybody that i can actually draw#well i say that but to be honest i put a lot of effort into those ms paint ''diego fey REAL'' doodles#but half of that is just because humans are a . something. to draw. and urban backgrounds are my worst nemesis#and also trying to work with ms paint to like slightly transform things is an incredible pain in the behind#anyways. yeagh 😎👍 behold the power of miego. getting me to actually finish something in photoshop for the first time in months#anyways. ive discovered the secret to getting me to draw stuff on photoshop. prepare yourselves accordingly#what i need to do is sketch & line something in ms paint. and then directly trace it over into photoshop#and then i can go ham#see because the reason i never did this before was because i would sketch things in ms paint#and try to line them in photoshop and it simply Wouldnt Work.#so i had assumed that if i wanted to draw in photoshop id have to sketch in it first. yknow. which i cannot do for some reason#something about the way the pen feels and the . its like the smoothing setting is on even when its on 0 percent. you know. anyways#but with this one i drew mia in ms paint as per usual . and i wanted to mess around with color & light#and i triedddd to do it in ms paint but unfortunately as you can probably imagine. doing stuff like this without layer filters#can get a little difficult. if you know what youre doing its obviously going to be easier but that being said i do not#when i pick colors i am literlaly just wildly guessing 😭🙏 which is fine for more straightforward coloring/shading#but not quite here. which is why i wanted to take a stab at it in the first place#so anyways i was like FINE WHATEVER and tried tracing the lineart in photoshop so i could take a stab at coloring in there#and i was . enlightened. (no pun intended). it WORKS#so anyways . you may actually be able to expect. some photoshop art from me#well ok thats a lie never expect art from me. but we can all dream together#anyways they really are the star-crossed doomed by the narrative romance ever. everything to me
186 notes
·
View notes
Text
patty sighting !!
#did u guys know kelly has a sister#this scene takes place a good few years (6...?) before the apocalypse starts BUT#it's relevant to red's origin story so it's being included in the thing i'm making#i've actually had this specific image in my head for a while but i was saving it for when i made the mbz story posts. however#i'm probably never going to do that so i'm making it now#btw the lighting in this scene.......... so difficult#took me a million tries to get right#i wanted it BLUE but it kept being too DARK#i still have to fix some clipping. & the gravity on their bracelets#(the bracelets are also a big part of red's origin story. symbolism. etc.)#but otherwise first scene mostly done :-) yay :-)#rainyrambles
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
so i already have an au or two (or three) for dead plate and you're never gonna guess what they involve
#dream's textposts🖋️#[Guy who's overly obsessed with undead things as a plot device voice] you'll never believe what i just thought of right now#so yeah at least two of these are gonna be easily guessed by people who know me just given my track record of being into nonhuman creatures#the third one is neat though. i need an excuse to talk about them online but it's difficult sometimes without being prompted to#if anyone guesses them all correctly you get a random doodle. im clawing my way out of art block but trying not to get overwhelmed#dead plate#dead plate au
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
day 192
a break from artfight for some good news! i have finally scheduled a surgical consult to have my enemy (read: uterus) removed. this is a bit of a scarier prospect than my breast reduction was, but i think it will be an equally impactful quality of life improvement when all is said and done!!
anyway those of yall who have been here since the beginning may remember me posting through that whole process so i figure why stop now.
#day 192#year 5#it me#cw gore#cw blood#cw... anthropomorphic uterus?????#hysterectomy#anyway much like the tit surgery this is both gender affirming and ALSO fixing a health problem that has been gnawing at me for years#never been confirmed but we suspect i have pcos and the usual medication regimen for that hasnt been managing things very well#SO suffice it to say my periods are logistically and mentally extremely fucking difficult to manage#always have been but since my thyroid problems began about a decade ago they've become horrible AND unpredictable#frankly im fuckin sick of it and going on T for the 6 months i did gave me SUCH a nice break from it all#that as things have started back up it has been made EXTREMELY clear what a huge burden i have been dealing with this whole time#basically i dont want to go back on T right now im happy where im at. BUT. the thought of having to have periods like this#for like 20-30 more years is rapidly becoming un fucking bearable#SO. we yoink that thang asunder
124 notes
·
View notes
Text
You can become so used to the darkness that you mistake it for the light. What feels safe, feels familiar, is not always as it appears to be.
#sorry that this is so ominous#it's more of a vent post i guess#I'm struggling with my depression and PTSD a lot lately#and it's becoming very difficult to deal with#sometimes with mental illness you end up falling into unhealthy cycles of thinking#or you resist the things that are good and healthy for you#I'm struggling a lot with those things right now#where i am just having a very hard time looking at the positives within my situation#but yeah#personal#vent post#vent
89 notes
·
View notes
Text
i haven’t been here much recently, and i’m sorry i’ve only been negative on the off chance i’ve been online, but let me just say one last piece before the end of this month, so that maybe the next might be better….
#or maybe my time here ends w this month…i’m not sure i guess it all depends on how i feel but as of right now#everytime i think i'm fine i open tumblr and immediately am sad again the whole app has become my doomscroll at this point#i got a notification on a random talking post from a while ago and it felt like reading the words of a completely different person#lately i find it difficult to find any joy here at all when it always feels so lonely… a type of loneliness i’ve never experienced before#everyone always has ppl interacting w them who are interested in their stuff or are always sent things that are reminiscent of them....#i’m always praised for remembering stuff abt other ppl but i wonder if anyone remembers anything abt me#what is it about me that is so forgettable am i dull am i uninteresting did i not solidify myself enough do you guys just not like me lolz#but i don't want this to come across as guilt tripping or being ungrateful to what i do have because ik comparison is the death of joy but#it's still hard to watch when it's so in your face and it makes me think if ppl only talk to me because they feel obligated to#because anyone can say empty words.... i wish my perception of things didn't turn bitter i wish i hadn't become so jaded but#over and over i've felt irrelevant cast aside overshadowed and i cannot exist in a place where i feel like i'm a ghost in the corner#idk i've never felt like This before and i'm at least glad it's something i can walk away from by just....leaving...#sad that this used to be somewhere i can run away To but now it's become somewhere i want to run away From#i don't know...even if i get over whatever this is...things will never be the same for me... i just don't think i belong here#if only i had never made this blog then i would have saved myself a world of turmoil
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
youidraw.com was lowkey a little disappointing
#bandit's doodles#grian#mumbo jumbo#waffle duo#is waffle duo even their duo name anymore#this must be some kind of sick joke right#Just for a bit in his video#Im calling it rn#It can't be permanent#waffle duo will live on forever#big fan of the grey hairs but the waffle man#think of the waffle#cue montage of all the waffle fun we've had over the seasons#now for the website#The setup looks great#looks professional#my expectations were high#They should not have been based on my last reviews#it had an eraser but it just didn't work?#whenever I tried to change the brush size it would just revert to the huge default??#It had that color picker thing with the gradient which was great#But whenever I tried to switch colors#the last brush stroke I did would change color#the selection tool was fine but when I tried to move things it was being so difficult#this might just be a mobile problem but still a problem#But there was this massive ad on the side of the screen so I didn't get the optimal canvas access#the stabilizer on the pencil was horrendous#that little 'no waffle :(' on mumbos head took like 8 tries for it to look legible in any way#Thats why I just used the text for grian which worked fine#actually 4/10 it looks good but works badly
23 notes
·
View notes