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i-will-go-with-you-five · 2 months ago

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My Five Lore

Heyyyyy I thought it was finally time to make this post! I've been doing ZR for about nine months now and have been posting from the sidelines so I figured it was about time to introduce myself and Five. Just a little rundown on what my Five is like and her story and stuff. She's basically me, but with a couple things changed.

Apperance:

She’s on the shorter side- Sam is always putting his elbow on her shoulder to annoy her but she secretly loves it :) And pretty stocky but really strong. Simon challenged her to a lifting competition once and while he eventually won, she had him sweating and it was a close thing. She wears her hair in really long double Dutch braids, and has a round face with bright hazel green eyes and a big smile. She also wears really brightly colored gear, especially shoes, its a long-lasting joke with her and the other runners. She's unreasonably attached to axes and baseball caps, and is pretty much constantly wearing something Jody made her.

She has a couple of pretty faint nicks and slices on her hands, from before the apocalypse. She got those was first learning to butcher as a teenager. But since the outbreak, she's gotten a stab wound on her left shoulder, and permanent bruising on her shins. She's very susceptible to shin splints, but its the apocalypse, so it's not like she can properly rest and treat them.

UPDATE: she has new scars now from the ending of Season Two. They are Pretty Important.

[One day I will make the most beautiful drawing of her ever. One day.]

Background:

Five is basically me, with a couple things (appearance, where she lived, some family details, etc) changed. She lived in Northern Montana, a stone's throw away from Canada, and was doing college remotely while working on a farm that raised big animals, and took care of her nieces and nephews while her siblings were at work. That's why she's such a jack-of-all-trades, with book and street smarts, she had a very diverse range of skills due to how she grew up. I consider Five as an AU of myself if I had been thrust into the apocalypse, so personality and history-wise Five and I are similar, except for the trauma of the apocalypse, where she was on her own for almost four months after Z-Day, and hardened her a bit. Five's real name is Lydia, but not a single person besides her knows that.

Early Outbreak:

She went on a rare vacation with her best friend, Nina, and her best friend's family to London two days before the outbreak, in early November of 2023. The worst timing. One day she's on a plane, the next she's seeing Big Ben for the first time, and the day after that hundreds of people have turned, including Nina's family, and they're fleeing for their lives in the chaos.

The plan was for the two of them to try and contact Lydia's family and try to find a way to get home, but the phone lines were all down within a day. So they decided to just get out of the city. Nina got bitten when they were on the outskirts of London, after a week of them surviving together. Lydia stayed with her as she died. Nina begged Lydia to kill her zombie-self, but Lydia just couldn't do it- she fled instead. She decided to kill her name, Lydia, along with her friend's death. It was the only way she felt that she could mourn.

She was then on her own for about four months, and her circumstances really changed her. She'd always been a a happy and trusting person, but each person she tried to group up with ended up betraying her, in a multitude of ways. She threw up mental barriers and became pretty grim and trusted no one. She can talk, but only to people that she likes, and only to one or two people at a time. The bigger the crowd, the quieter she is. But when she gets in a place of being comfortable, she has a lot to say. But in those four months, she said less and less, to the point where some people assumed she was mute. She had to stifle who she was in order to survive, and it took a huge toll on her. The pain of her bottled-up emotions was buried deep.

She's a Christian, and the only thing that kept her going in the apocalypse was clinging onto Christ with all of her might, even if her faith had been shaken by what seemed like the end of the world. She just kept running and fighting for something greater than herself. Save the next person stuck in a building, even if they stole her supplies. Run supplies to different groups of people, even if they then beat her bloody and left her for the zombies. Lead a pack of zombies away from a guy trapped in a tree, even if he then throttled her neck and made it even harder to speak. Give a message to a radio outpost, even if they then dishonored their side of the agreement and held her at gunpoint, rather than just attempt to send airwaves to the States in search of her family. Because if she couldn't do the right thing, and try to stay faithful to her values and Jesus, what good was left in the world?

She ended up at Mullins because, once again, she got betrayed. A group of highway robbers caught her unawares, and she literally ran into some soldiers, who promised to just help her get out of the tight spot, but instead brought her to Mullins and enlisted her. Sour and panicked, she was so uncooperative to the point where they shipped her out to Abel for Project Greenshoot so they wouldn't have to deal with her anymore.

Getting to Abel:

While the apocalypse has been The Worst Thing Ever, getting her helicopter shot down was probably the best thing that ever happened to her in the apocalypse. It was the last thing that she expected, a rocket launcher barreling towards her, after everything she's already been through, and it shook her. For the first time since when she had a depressive episode as a preteen, she just simply wanted to die. Death seemed like the best option as she fell through the air to the sound of hungry zombies beneath her. Everything hurt too much. God wasn't answering her sobbing cries of help every night. She'd given it her all and it still wasn't enough. Gave far more than she took and got hurt every time. If she gave up, everything would just be easier. She was about to accept her death and simply let go of life. It wasn't like she had any friends or family left to love her anymore.

But when that voice crackled into her headset, urging her on and giving her a name, Five, which felt right in a way she couldn't explain, encouraging her- she knew she had to keep going. Life wasn't over yet. There was still hope. So she ran. And the longer that voice, Sam, spoke, the lighter she felt and the less emotionally exhausted she became. A voice in the back of her mind told her that this was the answer to her prayers for a friend, and for help. But she was still incredibly cautious. This seemed like the nicest person in the world, but what if he hurt her? What if she got betrayed again? After all, she knew nothing of who this Sam Yao was, beyond being awkward and sweet and kind of adorable. Wait, adorable? Where had that thought come from?

She wanted to be mistrustful of everyone at Abel when she got there, that was her intent. Especially after the doctor threatened to not let her in. But having those people show her kindness that she hadn't seen in months crumpled her barriers like wet paper. By the time her 8-week training was over she'd sunk right into Abel perfectly. Jody was her good friend who was always up for a hug and a story, Janine was smart and practical and reminded her of her older sister to the point where she started to treat Janine like an older sister, Eugene was a goofball who made bad jokes with her while sympathizing with what she'd been through, and Maxine was a God-send for figuring out how to turn off her survival mode again.

And during that time, she wanted to become friends with Sam, the voice who saved her, so badly. But he was wrapped up in grief from Alice's death. Which she understood. Nina's death still ate at her. Not to mention having no idea if her family was dead or alive. So even though it killed her, because this was the first time she'd wanted to have a friend in forever, she kept her distance to protect him from her brokenness. Because even though she'd lightened up, she still was a woman of few words who held all of her pain back from everyone. Even if that voice in her head saying Sam was God's answer to her problems got stronger and more insistent every day. And even if Maxine told her multiple times that Sam relied on her more than he could express or she could realize. She had to hold back.

Being a Runner: falling for each other

Until the night run in the dark. [fanfic one shot here that will eventually become a twoshot once I finish the post-run debrief.] Where all that slammed through Sam's head was I need a miracle for Five, and all that slammed through Five's was I'm running for Sam. And the moment she crashed into Sam's arms, him sobbing with relief and her sobbing with exhaustion and delirium, was the moment that she realized that she did, in fact, love Sam Yao. And for Sam, that was the moment he realized that he had to become her best friend. And the rest of that night was the first time Five told anyone about her past and her pain and what the apocalypse had been like for her. And Sam was there. As they talked and listened to one another was the moment they firmly became best friends.

Five’s love for Sam only grows in the next few months. But… she doesn’t know what to say, or even think honestly. She’s never been in love before. Ever. She’s, well, she’s scared. Which she knows is stupid. But what do you even say about something like that? ‘Hey Sam, you've chipped away at the hardened exterior that I was forced to adopt bit by bit, and I've become myself again, and you push me to be even better than I was every day. Also I am totally in love with you.'? So she says it in every way besides words. With each moment with Sam. Each gesture is her way of saying I love you. And she runs. For the same reasons as before- her faith. Her trust in God. Her putting goodness back into the terrible world. But now for another reason too. For Sam. For his voice. And even if he doesn't understand it, how he pushes her to trust in her faith even more. Her faith and trust in God are stronger than ever now and she's very strong in it and tries to shine that light to others.

Sam realizes that he loves Five when someone sends Five to die out of spite, as revenge. She's coming back into the gates, angry but not as angry as he is. He's ready to throw down with the person who did that to his runner. Then the way she just grasps his shoulders, locking eyes with him, and reminding him to breathe, he just- falls. So hard and so fast. He knew that this was coming. He's felt it growing since she came back brandishing supplies with the biggest smile in the world for the DnD campaign he was starting. But he ignored it. And now he can't anymore. Because it's Five. His Five. But what do you even say about something like that? ‘Hey Five, you mean everything to me, actually. You've given me something to fight for each day, given me hope when I've had none, and have helped me grow so much and overcome my doubts. I really, really, really love you, more than anyone or anything.’ So he tells her with his words, with every single thing he says. Every voice crack of fear or excitement over comms. Except those three, which are coincidentally, the most important ones. He talks, for the same reason as before. To protect the people he loves. But now for another reason too. For Five. For her running. For who she's pushed him to become. How she's taught him to fight for something even bigger than before.

There is an ending for their story (its REALLY good) but you're just gonna have to wait to read it until I'm done writing it tehehehe! It's more climactic that way. I'll link it here when it's done.

And there we go! A little bit about my Five and her story <3 Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed!!

@stellar-collective drew my Five!! You can see her here<3 It's from this fanfic dabble

@tazzy-zooming the incredible made another drawing of her that I adore

and my dear friend @book-girl4evaaa did another here!!! Go flood her reblogs please

oh and @masterfuldoodler who is a WONDERFUL human being did her in her survival running mode SO WELL

and then she awed me again with this one which is like,,, the coolest thing EVER?? All of them are just SO SO SO GOOD IT PHYSICALLY PAINS ME HOW AMAZING IT IS

oh we are EATING now and have even MORE talented friends who have done me the honor of drawing my Five here's @valesyn 's incredibly dramatic rendition of Five fleeing zombies to that epic verse in Heavydirtysoul by Twenty One Pilots

Ao3

#i-will-go-with-you-five #mild spoilers #zombies run #runner five #sam yao #zr blog #runner 5 #zr #maxine myers #janine de luca #simon lauchlan #jody marsh

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runner5anna · 29 days ago

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zombies run secret santa for @are-you-sure-its-me-you-see

HI i hear you like hurt / comfort ?? HERE YOU GO

It's set post-season three, pre-season four.

It's coldand dark, and everyone is tired. Yet, it's the first Demons and Darkness session in months. Sam and 5 are sat together, waiting for everyone, as they slowly radio that they can't attend for whatever reason. They've not talked in months, let alone looked at one another. And now they're stuck in a room together.

Big thanks to @notforconsumption or @delucadarling !!

The ticking of the clock echoed around the room, the hand moving in time with Five’s bouncing leg. It was a cold, fresh day. The type that makes you wear gloves in doors and blankets around the house.

Tick. Bounce. Tick. Bounce. Tick. Bounce.

On a day like this, Sam and Five would have made a blanket fort in the shack. They’d huddle against the cold with warm tea and whatever snacks they could salvage from the kitchens.

That was a long time ago now.

Bounce. Tick. Bounce. Tick.

Fifteen minutes. They were supposed to start fifteen minutes ago. Yet, still, the radio calls still rolled in.

Jody was first. ‘Yup, sorry Sam. I had something last minute crop up. Sorry.’

Then it was Simon. ‘Yes Sammy boy…Jenny and I had other plans! Sorry I didn’t tell you.’

Finally, it was Maxine and Paula. ‘So sorry Sam! Sara’s been fussing. Again.’

It had been weeks since Five and Sam had a proper conversation. Ever since Moonchild, ever since Sara, ever since the seasonal depression on top the normal depression…It was all rolling on - and the once free flowing sunny conversion turned to frigid small talk.

Tick. Bounce. Tick. Bounce. Tick. Bounce.

Something. He had to say something. They couldn’t just sit there in this freezing room watching the snow pile up outside. Sam had to at least start a conversation. But what to say?

‘So…how are you?’

Bounce. Bounce. Bounce.

He was only met with the ruffle of fabric. Five was looking at something - away with the fairies as they used to call it. Now, Sam knew the glassy eyed look. It was Moonchild. Or the cocktail mix of meds that Labotse had put them on. Sam reached out over the table, tapping it with his palm. The noise startled Five out of their daze with a gasp.

‘How are you? Are you okay?’ Sam reiterated. He held their gaze firmly, speaking loud and clear.

‘Fine.’

‘That's good…Maxine and Paula will be here soon.’

‘I heard the radio.’

‘Sorry…sorry. I thought that you weren't listening.’

‘I was.’ They turned back to their original position - curled tight, like a spring.

And so, the incessant silence returned.

Bounce. Tick. Bounce. Tick.

Once, the conversation flowed like warm spring water. It would go on for hours, winding around them. They’d talk and talk long into the night, just sharing stories. Even then, when the stories ran dry, the silence didn’t feel hostile. Just a pleasant lull.

Five sat across from him, expression black and unreadable. They had their nails pressed into their cheeks, leaving little Cs imprinted in their skin.

Five would sit beside him, under blankets and sharing snacks and secrets. Under giggles and hot chocolate they’d spend time just together.

Sam missed it. Deeply. He’d feel a chasm deepen in his chest whenever they’d pass by. He missed his friend, his runner, his Five.

‘Fuck it.’ Sam huffed. ‘It's freezing. I’m putting the kettle on. While we have tea, you can help me plan this encounter.’

He slapped the table as he stood up, knocking down a few minis which Five hurriedly propped back up.

‘The paints and brushes are on top of my bag.’ He pointed at the satchel with a spoon. ‘Can you grab them for me?’

At the suggestion, Five looked like a deer in the headlights - all wide eyed and scared.

‘Go on. I bought them for you. I know you like them.’

They looked down at his bag, then up at him. They didn’t move a muscle.

Sam flicked the kettle on and headed over to the bag, placing it on the table. He dug through and placed the paints and brushes on the table.

Five didn’t move. They stared at the paints and brushes like foreign, alien objects.

Sam pushed them towards Five. ‘Here.’ He grabbed a half painted mini off of the table - A finely detailed golden dragon. ‘You started it before…’ The words got stuck on his tongue.

The kettle began to screech, and he turned on his heel. Good timing really.

While he made the tea, he could hear the rustle of the paints and Five opened them.

‘It’s been a long time since I’ve done this.’ Five spoke gently, in an almost robotic tone. Their voice was choked from underuse.

‘It has.’ Sam inhaled sharp, braving himself for the conversation. ‘We should do it more often - like we used to?’

Five put the brush down and cleared their throat. ‘Is…it safe?’

‘What do you mean?’

‘Will it be safe? How do you know I won’t…’ They made a stabbing motion with their hands, mimicking the score of Psycho. ‘…you know.’

‘No. No I don’t know.’

Five fiddled with the ends of the brush, flicking out the crusted paint between the bristles.

Sam poured the water over the bags. He’d even allowed himself to have a fresh one. One mint tea for him, a chamomile for Five. It felt natural. He’d done it millions of times before.

‘You do know what I mean.’

‘I really don’t.’ Sam chuckled. He handed the mug towards Five.

‘Thank you. You’ve…put it in my favourite mug.’

‘I have!’ Sam beamed. ‘It’s been ages since we’ve done this. I thought you might like it.’

It was a Gromit shaped mug - a deeply impractical thing. Five was obsessed with it. Because it was so difficult to drink out of, no one else would touch it, and it was large enough to hold a ‘decent cuppa’ as they’d call it.

Five picked the brush up and put the end into their mouth, chewing. All of a sudden, they flinched, gasped and pulled it out. The brush clattered as it hit the hardwood floor. ‘Sorry!’

‘Why are you apologising?’

‘Sorry, should I not have done it?’ Their breathing became sharp and ragged as they looked to the floor, shoving their face behind their hands.

‘Five, it’s all right.’ Sam was well versed in talking people through panic attacks. ‘Just breathe with me. In for one, out for two. Are you ready?’

He counted up in twos, staying in front of Five, ready to pull their hands away if they started to scratch or draw blood.

‘In for four, out for six. You got this.’

‘I can’t. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.’

‘Five, I don’t know what you're apologising about.’

‘Chewing…’ They coughed and hiccuped between gasps of air. ‘Chewing your paintbrush.’

‘Oh - don’t worry about that. It’s just a paintbrush. I chew them all the time.’

5’s deep eyes began to well even more with tears. ‘Are you sure?’

‘Pretty sure. I haven’t chewed that one. The marks there are you, actually. Didn’t think we should be sharing chewed pens. That was gross before the apocalypse.’ Sam dug around in his pockets and produced a handkerchief. ‘I have a feeling this is about more than a paintbrush.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘People don’t start having panic attacks for no reason. Talk to me. I’m here to listen.’ He resisted the urge to wipe the tears from Five’s face as he once did. They’d simply flinch away.

Five cleared their throat as they took the handkerchief. They pulled their feet up, crossing their legs. ‘Uh…’ their eyes skipped about the room. ‘It’s just…’

‘Moonchild?’ Sam offered.

‘Yeah. Yeah that. She used to get…funny about me chewing her pens. Said it was gross. That morning she got all…fussy about it before sending me to Abel. And I am looking up at you with a pen in my mouth and suddenly I watch it all over again. Whenever I blink I am back in that moment.’

‘Like a flashback?’

‘Yeah. That. It will be the pens, then the boat…then the axe..’

Sam held his hand out, lying palm up on the table. ‘I don’t blame you.’

‘Pardon?’

‘I don’t blame you. It wasn’t your fault. You weren’t all there, Five. I can’t blame you for something you can’t control.’

Five’s tear stained face stared back at him. For a moment their lip wobbled, until they pounced forwards, wrapping their arms around his shoulders.

Sam gasped and flinched - his muscles going tense. A natural reaction. His hands hung in mid air. It had been so long. Usually, Five would jump away if he came anywhere near them. Yet, here they were, hanging off his shoulders.

‘I’m just so scared. So scared I’ll hurt you. Or that I have hurt you more. Or someone else.’

Sam slowly lowered his hands down, gently resting them on Five’s back, rubbing up and down. ‘You won’t hurt me.’

‘How do you know that? How do you know that for sure?’

‘Because we have plans for that.’

‘What happens if those fail?’

Sam lifted Five off of him, holding them by their shoulders. He looked into their watercolour eyes - watery and round. ‘Because if you were going to hurt me, you wouldn’t get so upset about it.’

Five sniffed and leaned back, holding the handkerchief in their hands, pressed against their cheek. ‘Why are you so nice to me? It’s not like I deserve it.’

‘Because you're my friend. My Five. And I trust you.’

5’s lip curled at the edge, showing a single white tooth. It was brief, but picturesque. A rare sight nowadays.

‘Thank you.’ They mouthed.

It was 8.30 by the time Sara was asleep. She was fussy, teething probably. Maxine had been pacing up and down the hallway while Paula tried whatever home remedy she could think of. Eventually, a combination of Celery sticks, rubbing her ears and a poor rendition of Sam’s Chinese lullaby to get her to sleep. And so, she was relinquished over to the babysitter so they could pretend to be normal humans for a few hours. By pretending to be elves, gnomes and druids.

‘Hey! I am so sorry we’re late-’ Maxine was cut off by Paula grabbing her swiftly backwards.

‘Shhh.’

‘Why did you do that?’

‘Look.’

Sam had Five tucked under his arm, a book in the other. He talked gently as he ran his finger along the pages of the game master manual.

‘What about this one?’

‘No. That one has no legendary action. If it's a battle against the BBEG, it's got to have a legendary action.’ Five said back. They cupped tea in their hands. The smell of chamomile sang through the air.

‘True. But it looks so cool.’

‘Could we homebrew it? Combine it with another monster. Steal a few legendary actions.’

‘Wouldn't hurt - would it?’

Five nodded, flicking through the monster manual on the table. ‘Here. ‘This is a good Legendary action...’

‘It’s been ages since they’ve done that.’ Paula whispered over Maxine’s shoulder. She wrapped her arms around her waist, bringing her into her chest. ‘Let's just…give them space. Let them be together. Just for now.

#zombies run #zr #runner five #runner 5 #sam yao #zombies run!#zrs3 spoilers #zombies run secret Santa 2024 #zombies run secret Santa #zr secret Santa #zrx

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