#they're basically already a whole fanfic

[faislittlewhiteraven]

Been thinking this a while but

You ever think about why the House and King in SASASAaP is so much worse than it is in ISaT?

Like, at first I put it down to just 'different timelines/different worlds' but the more I think about it, the more I've realized it is very much the same world and King and the difference specifically lies with the two game's respective Siffrins.

Why the House is so different: In Act 5 of ISaT when Sif 2.0 is running around losing his mind, the House very clearly warps around him. At first this seems to be just Sif's perception of events but when the friends come to rescue him, they bring up that the rooms were warped around, which means that Sif's Wish Craft doesn't just warp time but also space. Because ISaT Sif on some level didn't want the loops to end, the House grew longer, pathways stopped making sense, they were lead to every room of the house where they had any kind of precious memory with their family (but notably not the rock trap room) etc...

And clearly the same thing is happening to the House in SASASAaP, the difference is Loop/OG's mindset: They want to get through the house as fast as possible without 'distractions' like the very helpful Hidden Library they don't know exists but at the same time they dread the king (dread their friends dying over and over and over) so the path is short and free of bosses (including those 'Nostalgia' star crest Sadnesses), but full of time consuming and tricky puzzles to delay them -even just a bit longer- from what they see as the inevitable end. ...Also the path no longer requires the Keyknife and OG Sif gets outright angry at the Change Statue when the others pray at it so make of that what you will.

Ok, so the Houses are affected by Sif's mental state, but what about the King? The King is a totally different kettle of fish. He very much is not effected by the respective Sifs' Wish Craft but he can pick up on it. And well, how does he react in ISaT when he realizes Siffrin 2.0 is using Wish Craft?

... *Thinks about a hand, squeezing*

So yeah. My theory for why the King is so much worse, especially in the Perfect Route in Start Again is simple: Loop/OG Sif had been looping so long that their reek of Wish Craft's sweet smell was basically covering the whole party and the King, not knowing who to torture directly, responds by trying to kill them all especially horribly, especially on the 'Perfect' route where Sif likely continues hiding their looper status even as they are dying. ...Trying to mentally break them just as he tries to break Siffrin 2.0 in ISaT.

...Which is also why he doesn't auto kill everyone in the 'True' route - because that's the route Sif gives up pretending they're not a mess, meaning the King can identify that Sif is the Wish Crafter by the party's concern for them and their lack of reaction (much like the King did in ISaT), can see that Siffrin is already breaking, and thus being the 'merciful ruler' he is, decides to toy with them a bit, only going for the killing blow when he gets lower on health and starts getting concerned he might lose (which in turn means most of his attention in the fight was on the clearly not ok Sif, the party likely noticed and that's probably why Isabeau was able to jump in and block the King's fatal attack in time).

So um. YEAH. That's my thoughts on SASASAaP's King; he's the exact same as ISaT's King the only difference is that by the time OG Sif reached him the first time, they'd already looped a horrific amount of times and reeked so strong of Wish Craft that the King never even entertained the 'talk them down' facade and went straight for the kill/'torture them into submission' option every time.

Not sure these details matter too much really but I figure it might be helpful to all the Loop lovers out there making wonderful fanfics to consider (circumstances Odile can theorise about if Loop ever gives her enough hints to try, perhaps?) so... yeah. Hope my thoughts were interesting and would like to hear your thoughts on the stuff I didn't manage to figure out like the skill differences between the two parties, and various people frozen in the House having different pronouns and things (currently going with: Loop/OG Sif is not really listening to anything and is possibly misremembering details they don't care about for the later but the former is very much 'I know this is probably because refined mechanics but what if-?!' area for me and I'd love to see in-setting reasoning for it) <3

Edit: Realized I forgot to mention a thing: A sweet scent is never brought up in SASASAaP probably because that might've been a later addition to the plot but I like to think it's more because everyone in the prologue is just so used to it at this point that the party are putting it down to being part of the 'King altered' House while OG Siffrin is completely numb to it at this point, and the King's not interested in talking so... yeah. No one brings it up. ...Might also explain why Bonnie doesn't offer the Melanga fritters: the sweet scent could potentially alter the taste (and also they're not 100% sure Sif likes them) so instead they offer sweets like the candy and Palmiers that would be less effected, the burnt samosas which are 'already bad' and the fish head which probably tastes so strong that Bonnie's less worried about it's taste being masked. But that's just my spitballing for excuses so hope that's helpful for anyone wanting to use this info? XD

[tsukimefuku]

The Event (Part 1)

This is an older version of this. The current one can be found linked on the masterlist.

You find yourself entangled with Nanami in his apartment, and worry where this might be going.

Tags: +18 (!!!), WITH PLOT (there is always a plot), Jujutsu Kaisen, SMUT, f!reader, Nanami x reader, alcohol consumption,  they're clearly in love, fingering, bj, penetration, a little angst, some fluff, hurt + comfort.

WC: 5.2K

Theme song (?): Want me too - Mons Vi (on Youtube)

Hope you guys enjoy my filth, yet again. This is part of my "Jujutsu Partners Canon Divergence AU", a sequence of short stories and random drabbles for a Nanami x f!reader x Higuruma fanfic I'll eventually write (eventually). This is preceded specially by "Would you let me die?", here, and "Where does your mind drift", here. It comes before “The man who played with fire”. To see the ever-growing list of one-shots, please visit my masterlist :)  

Disclaimer: these one-shots are NOT written and posted in chronological order of events. To see where this story fits in the timeline, please check the masterlist mentioned above.

“I've been fooled twice and again

Flowers dying that I send

But I want you

I want you

I want you to want me, too”

— Want me too, Mons Vi

You were pressed against the wall of his apartment, and Nanami's insistent hands on your waist were doing the pressing, while you fidgeted around his shoulders to remove his suit jacket. You both had locked lips and tongues to each other, and you couldn't remember another time in your life you had been this breathless while kissing someone. That boulder of a man and the heat of his body sent all your senses spiraling as you finished taking his suit jacket off and tugged his shirt to pull him even closer — something that was clearly impossible, given you were both already glued to one another.

Then, you tried to remember how the fuck the both of you wound up in this situation.

***

"Nanami..." you hiccuped, "you're d-drunk!" Lowering your beer mug on the bar counter, you pointed at him, accusingly. "C-completely hammered."

"Is..." Nanami took a moment to realize he had his eyes closed for a few seconds. Were it seconds? He opened them, as if that would help him with the drunken vertigo. It just made the situation worse. "... That so?"

"You're talking so damn slow, and you had your eyes closed for like a whole minute. Dude, you're so-" you hiccuped again, taking another gulp of beer, completely forgetting what you were about to say.

Somewhat amused at how you simply never finished the sentence, he pinched the bridge of his nose with his fingers, trying to ground himself. Nanami didn't recall the last time he got this completely boozed up. Both of you were pretty strong when it came to alcohol, but tonight, you two maybe went a little too overboard. "You don't seem to be fending off so well..." He stretched his last word, feeling a little dizzy, "... Either."

"Is this a competition, Nanami? ... I'll win!" You declared, bottoming out your beer mug, making a pretty huge effort to put it back on the counter without breaking the glass. "... Do I want to win this-" 

The barman looked at you two. "We're closing. Can I get you guys some water?"

Oh, that was why you were both so banged up. You had been talking and drinking nonstop for hours without eating anything.

"Holy shit, Nanami, we've been drinking for five hours?" You asked him, stunned. He answered nothing, having his eyes shut again, head dangling back, while he leaned on the chair. How does he keep sleeping while seated? This is so bizarre. You grabbed his arm and shook it lightly, and Nanami was pulled awake.

"We need to pay for the drinks, sir." He said to the barman, much to the barman's worry. 

"I'll... Get your check, and some water for the both of you, okay?"

You both nodded, like puzzled kids.

After paying (with a lot of effort), you and Nanami walked outside, just to realize basically every joint was closing, and that it was raining. No, raining wasn't the most adequate word for it. It was absolutely pouring.

"Shit, I'm never getting home like this." You complained, as Nanami fidgeted with a small umbrella he somehow had on him. Considering he easily walked around with his blunt blade underneath his suit jacket, carrying this must've been quite easy. 

"How did you know?" You asked, pointing at the umbrella.

"I always check the forecast before leaving my apartment." He answered, still fumbling with the thing. Of course he does. You took the umbrella from Nanami's hands and opened it, giving it back to him.

"Hey, Nanami... Do you live nearby?"

He started to look around, pondering for a moment, until he could locate exactly where the both of you were. "I... do, actually." He paused, realizing he had his posture crooked, fixing it. "It's a 20-minute walk from here."

You thought for a moment. "Can I-" hiccup, "come over and wait for the rain-" hiccup, "to pass?"

"Yes..." He blinked slowly, still processing the words on his mind. "Of course."

As he held the umbrella on his right side, you intertwined your arm to his, pushing yourself closer, so the two would fit under the tiny thing. However, given the fact that the both of you were considerably tall, and that he was specially broad, that didn't work so well, leaving each with some shoulder exposed to the unforgiving weather.

Nanami sighed slowly. "We will get completely drenched."

You scoffed. "No, we won't, and if we do, it will help us sober the hell up. Come on."

***

Feeling less under the influence after a walk in the rain and cold, Nanami took his keys and opened the door, letting you in. He noted you were both somewhat damp while taking your shoes off, but not completely soaked in water as he'd expected. He flipped the lights on, and then, you could see the inside of his apartment — something you, not so proudly, used to wonder about from time to time.

It had mostly light colors with warm tones to the furniture. He had two bookcases completely filled with books that seemed to be organized in a pretty specific and convoluted way. They neatly met together on each shelf. He had an armchair, and above it was a greenish type of light fixture for reading. The windows were incredible, and provided a great view of Tokyo. The kitchen was on the opposite side of the sofa, and it was an open-type of kitchen, where someone from the living room could see all of it. It was an impeccably clean and well-maintained place, and if this wasn't Nanami, you'd probably think it belonged to a serial killer, given how it was extremely tidy, to a clearly obsessive length. You felt you were dirtying the apartment just by looking at it.

"Um... Where can I sit?" You asked, hesitantly. He pointed to one of the chairs at the dining table, and you promptly sat there, trying not to move too much and spread water around the place.

You started to slide your hand through your hair, just to realize it was quite wet. He noticed, and went inside his room for a minute, coming back with a blue towel, giving it to you. Taking the towel from his hands, you shuffled it around your head, drying whatever you could. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." Nanami replied, sitting down on the edge of his sofa and removing his tie calmly. He folded it a couple of times before putting the tie over the sofa's arm.

"So, how are you feeling? You look more sober." You said. He did, actually. You noticed his usually neat, perfectly aligned hair had some locks over his forehead, probably due to the rain. His blue shirt was slightly damp, and his pants, just under his knees, had definitely seen better days.

"I feel more alert, yes. And the vertigo has stopped, thankfully. Although I'm still quite inebriated." Nanami replied, as he leaned back on the cushions crossing his legs, and you noticed the slightest hint of imbalance. "What is your status?"

"I'm sobering up a little. But I'm still pretty fucked, though." You answered, chuckling while you rested the towel over your lap. "I'll definitely regret this tomorrow."

He huffed, amused. "I will too, probably."

You were both silent for a moment, while the pouring rain filled the ambiance. It had eased out, but was still pretty heavy.

"Nanami..." You began.

"Yes?" He braced himself. He knew some complicated question or contemplation was just about to be thrown at him. Nanami had noticed for a while now that you liked to think out loud and chat about your ruminations.

"Remember when I asked you to let me die if it would save somebody else, and you refused?" You questioned, starting to probe him.

Strangely, it didn't annoy him at all, especially after the conversation you both shared when you were stranded with Ijichi by the mountains. He thought at the time you made that request, he'd like to go back to it, eventually. "Yes, I do recall that." Nanami answered.

"Why did you- I mean, we're supposed to-" Talking about this was hard, and being still somewhat drunk made the task nearly impossible. Gladly, he already knew what you wanted to go on about.

"I don't want you to die. You see, even with your antics," he began, "you have become an  important person in my life. As jujutsu sorcerers, that unfortunately is hard to come by and stay. You..." He paused for a second. "You stayed, and I'd like to keep it that way."

You were slightly surprised, given you expected from Nanami some sort of less straight-forward declaration about the importance and relevance of people in his life. It must've been the alcohol, you thought.

"Why did you request that from me, in particular?" He inquired.

"Because you know me better than anyone currently in my life," you blurted out, "and I knew you'd not take it like... I don't know. I just knew you'd understand where I was coming from, especially having been by my side when-" You choked up and couldn't finish the sentence. He knew, he remembered clearly what transpired ten years ago in your hometown, one of his most significant missions. You weren't aware of it, but even after the conversation you had years ago, he still blamed himself to some degree.

"You know me well, too. So how did you arrive at the conclusion that I would agree to such a request?" Nanami questioned, curious eyes glancing at you.

"You're such a dutiful and respectful person. A decent one, too. Especially regarding other people's wishes, when it's within your powers to honor them. So I thought you'd agree to it." You confessed, shrugging. 

He sighed. "I'm not a hero, I'm a jujutsu sorcerer. I came back because out of the two stupid things I could do, this was the one I was better suited for."

"You see, I think that's bullshit." You said, finally confronting him on this ready-to-go speech Nanami had most of the time. He was a bit surprised. You continued. "I know you care underneath that facade. Hell, I think I can actually say I know you, Mr. Bangs — yes, I remember them. We go way back, so don't try to preach to the choir. You're someone actually worried about saving people and doing good deeds in this dirty world of jujutsu."

The corner of his mouth stretched a little, and he seemed to be almost smiling. However, his expression was still blank enough to make his surge of warmth and fluttering unnoticeable. "If you knew that, then why did you believe I'd oblige to such a request?" He was still under the influence, and in normal circumstances, wouldn't be tap dancing dangerously around this boundary like he was right now.

You blushed and looked away as you began to answer him. "I just... Believed your 'preaching' for a second, I guess."

"I see." He answered, still looking at your face, thinking how lovely you looked when you blushe- No, stop it, he thought to himself. You noticed his eyes staring at you in a way that remembered the conversation you had while stranded some days prior.

“Is your mind drifting, Nanami?” You inquired, playfully. Looking at him to wait for an answer, your eyes locked onto his prominent jaw and chiseled face, and you wanted to rub your own face on his until you got cuts on your ski- Get a hold of yourself, woman, you mentally chastised yourself.

He didn’t fail to notice it, too. Rather than feeling embarrassed at being caught red-handed, daydreaming of you, he threw the ball right back at you. “Is yours?” 

You promptly looked away, yet again, heart skipping beats as you tried to keep yourself under control. Then, you noticed through the window that the rain had finally subsided.

Time to run before you went past the point of no return.

"Nanami, the rain is gone. I guess this is my cue." You said, hastily getting up. You were nervous, and having him probing you — not the other way around — was pushing all of your buttons in ways you were not prepared for. Furthermore, you were the type to make other people uncomfortable through joking and blunt sincerity, just so no one couldn't do it to you first. But with Nanami, after so much time, you had become vulnerable, something that scared the living shit out of you. You just knew Nanami was a decent and good man who'd never take advantage of this, and on top of that, you kind of owed the fact you were still alive to him.

He seemed a little disappointed, his expression less indecipherable than before. "I understand. Well..." He said as he got up. "Return safely."

You approached him to say goodbye, and your senses — as well as your common sense — dulled as you felt his perfume, now evaporating along with the water from his clothes. "Bye, then." You said, suddenly planting a chaste kiss on his cheek. 

Instead of retreating, as he normally would in a situation like this, Nanami closed his eyes and leaned his face to press your lips harder against his face, letting out a deep sigh of satisfaction that sent chills down his body. You inhaled him in, and before you knew, he was sliding down his own face, brushing his cheeks against your mouth intently, until his lips met yours. He let out a soft low groan as they made contact, and one of his hands made its way to your back, effectively pulling you into his warmth.

That was the moment you lost any willpower to get out of this unscathed, and you threw your arms around his head, which stole a light gasp from him. You used this opportunity to press your tongue inside his mouth, and his own tongue came to entangle with yours. Nanami grabbed you by your waist and pushed you against the wall, starting to pant lightly while the both of you were locked in a passionate kiss, ready to wash away the last ten years.

Oh, yeah. That's how this started.

He had his body pressed against yours, and you both did not dare to part the kiss or open your eyes, for you knew the moment you did, one or the other would pull the both of you back to the reality of how much of a bad idea this was. Not only were you and Nanami colleagues, but you effectively worked together on missions. On top of that, this wasn’t just a one-night stand or a random hook up, it was pretty well established you had feelings for each other, and some complicated unresolved issues. Things that having drunken sex usually tends to make even more chaotic. 

Suddenly, he rubbed his hips against yours just the right way, and you felt his throbbing erection pressed against you. You moaned loudly against his lips, open-mouthed and tongues grinding each other. Your moan made him press his mouth against yours to a closed kiss, and all the hairs on his arm and neck propped up with a shiver. Nanami went still, and the lack of mindless friction against his body brought you back to Earth for a split second.

“I’m leaving/Please leave” you both said at the same time, as he jumped back, sitting haphazardly over the sofa’s arm and tried — without much success — to cover his hardened length with his closed fist, looking away with a completely flushed and vermilion face. I should consider quitting alcohol, was the idea he entertained.

Panting frantically, you ran to the door, snatched your shoes from the entrance without even putting them on, and got out, letting it close behind you. You tried to catch your breath while hunched over, and evening out your breathing was being much harder than you thought, though you figured it could be from your heart racing and throbbing against your chest insistently. There was a ringing in your ears that you wanted to wait out until leaving the building, and so you stood there, right outside his apartment, for some minutes. However, while trying to pull yourself together, you noticed something.

You never heard the door locking.

I want him, I’ve wanted him for so long now, and he wants me too. What am I doing out here? I’m seeing this through to the end, you thought to yourself, with liquor-bought courage, resting your hand on the door knob. Pushing your body while you tried to silence every anxiety and impression that this was a bad idea, you entered the apartment again, to find Nanami sitting at the edge of his bed, beads of sweat on his forehead, as he incredulously and eagerly lifted his gaze to glance at you. You felt you must’ve looked desperate, and simmering under his slightly vacant stare, he seemed desperate too, clutching his fist on the mattress strongly enough to deform it a little.

“You… never locked your door” you remarked, removing your coat.

“I… did not.” He answered. “More specifically, I couldn’t find the strength to do so.” 

Nanami seemed to have reached the same conclusion you did when you were given time to think by yourself outside. 

Starting to walk towards him, you removed your socks, then started to unbutton your shirt, and he seemed hypnotized, following your stride with needy eyes. You let your shirt fall back, sliding over your arms until it hit the ground. Standing right in front of him, you put your hands together to unbutton your pants, and he held your hands in place, hesitantly.

You were resolute, but he seemed to still be swaying between what to (not) do.

“I want you. I’ve wanted you for so long. I… please…” you pleaded, barely brushing the side of your face against his, sending electricity all throughout his body. “I know you want me too.” You brushed the tip of your nose delicately over his chiseled cheekbone, to look him in the eyes.

Sighing deeply with his eyes closed, he finally opened them, and put his own nose right beside yours, making it possible for you to feel his breathing, lips nearly touching. “I do.”

You immediately kissed him, and it was different this time. The feeling wasn’t so urgent, but your lips locked deeply and intensely. He caressed the side of your hair with his fingertips, sliding his index finger around the edge of your ear, sending chills down your spine. Nanami then put his hands, one to each side of your hips, and guided you delicately to sit beside him on the bed. After that, he slid himself further back on the mattress, and you followed along.

As you both were in the middle of the bed, he rested his palm on your chest, pushing you softly to lie down, with his honeyed eyes still locked to yours. Every touch he made was so intent you felt your body shiver, like this was the first time you were ever touched by another person. To call Nanami an intense lover would be an understatement.

Lying down slowly, you gazed up at him, feeling your face searing hot as you did. This man was so goddamn handsome, and the way he looked at you nearly knocked the air out of your lungs.

His hands traveled between your breasts, down your abdomen, and reached the edge of your pants, unzipping you and pushing them as well as your underwear to your mid-thighs. Still looking at you, analyzing your each and every facial expression, Nanami started to slide one of his hands to where your already drenched underwear was previously. You felt somewhat embarrassed to be already that wet from some kissing and grinding, but oh, well. He apparently had that effect on you. 

As his fingers reached your dripping folds, his eyes widened a little, and his expression was kind of… amused? “Oh.”

Your face blushed even harder. “I… You… We were and-“

“You want me that intensely?” Nanami said, touching his forehead to yours, nose side by side.

“I… do. Please.” You answered, a little defeated.

He rubbed his lips against yours, and sighed, seemingly fluttering. “Then have me. Have all of me.” He pressed his tongue against your mouth, and you let him in, at the same time his fingers started to rub against your core. You mewled into his mouth, rolling your eyes back, and propping your hands to hold the nape of his head. He was softly grinding himself to the side of your body, searching for any relief to this throbbing clothed erection. 

He rubbed his middle finger to your clit, and the others rolled your outer folds in, pinching them delicately. As you mewled and moaned into his mouth, he let out satisfied groans, trying to hold himself together as you fell apart to his touch. The sounds you made being under his will were just exquisite.

You started to grind your pussy against his hand, and attentively, he applied more pressure with his fingers over your nub, eliciting a loud and powerful moan from you, as you pushed full force your lips on his. His body trembled, and he wasn’t sure if he’d be able to stop doing this to you right now without going mad if you, by any chance, changed your mind about this whole endeavor.

Rocking your hips back and forth, you started to feel the heat pooling on your lower abdomen, tugging at his shirt urgently and desperately. He noticed it, and parted his lips from yours, keeping a small distance between your faces so he could watch you crumbling down in real time. You were completely debauched, flustered and messy. His heart throbbed in his chest, as he had never seen you look so beautiful as you did at this very moment. He could still smell the flowery scent from your hair, now mixed with your breath and sweat. It was heavenly.

Bubbling up and all throughout your body, you came onto his hands nearly yelling out of sheer pleasure, saying his name, and with your hands to the back of his neck, pressed your nails so deep into Nanami’s skin it almost drew blood. He huffed, delighted, as you quivered and convulsed underneath him. Nanami wanted to ask you to stay and not leave ever again.

Riding out your high, you pulled his face closer, planting a soft kiss on his lips.

Then, you moved your hand smoothly down his chest and abdomen until you reached the outline of his cock underneath his pants. You grabbed it firmly, and he let out a choked grunt from the back of his throat, launching his head back and pumping his girth involuntarily against your touch. You smiled.

“And you want me too, that badly?”

“I do.” He replied, pulling his hand up from your folds and tasting you from his fingers, while he looked straight at you. You saw his eyes half lidded as he tasted it. Sighing at the sight of that, you thought for a moment you came a little just from it. 

You pushed him back on the bed with your hands and slowly began to unbutton the rest of his signature blue shirt, removing it, and straddling yourself on top of his hips. Your pussy was pressed over his cock, and he put both of his hands firmly over your thighs, grinding up, grunting as he did. The motion, after you became so sensitive, had you seeing stars and sparkles in the back of your eyes. Letting out a mixture of a huff and a chuckle, you basked in the vision you had in front of you, and slid down your hands to open his pants. You did, and removed them until they fell on the floor. 

Suddenly, you gave a lick on his abs, and he shivered, letting out a faint moan. You made your way with your tongue slowly down his body, planting a few kisses until you got there. His cock was extremely hard, the tip was red and already leaking. Your mouth watered at that sight to behold.

Nanami suddenly put his hand on your cheek, and you looked at him. His face was flustered, his hair had already fallen completely out of its usual slick arrangement, and the needy look on this man’s face sent a wave of heat down your back. 

“I don’t want to alarm you, but I’m… Extremely wound up.” He confessed, a little embarrassed. “If by any chance this becomes too much, tell me to stop.” 

You smiled at him. “I won’t. Have all of me, too.”

His gaze deepened as your tongue made its way to his tip, glazing it with saliva. He immediately grabbed your hair and let out a strained moan, launching his head to the pillow underneath it. You swallowed his length, inch by inch, careful not to choke ahead of time. You noticed him squirming his hips underneath you, probably holding himself from bucking upwards full force.

Once you had taken him all in, you positioned yourself the most comfortable way and started to encouragingly press your hands on the sides of his hips, for him to pump his cock inside your mouth.

Still tightly — though not bruisingly — holding onto your hair, he asked, “are you sure?”

“Mm-Hmm”, was all you got out, with that massive cock inside your mouth. He started off slow, grinding the back of his cock to your tongue, gravely groans filling the room. As you seemed to be taking it well, his pace picked up, and his tip began hitting the back of your throat, deliciously choking you, as a few tears bubbled up in your eyes.

You were moaning to the taste and sound of Nanami, and your moaning seemed to snap something inside of him. Nanami began thrusting into your mouth intently, and after so much build up and grinding, suddenly, came while bucking his hips sloppily, painting the back of your throat with pure white. You began drinking him all in.

When you finished, you cleaned your face with the back of your hand, slowly making your way back to him. Before you did, though, Nanami held your waist and laid you down on the sheets, climbing on top of you and kissing you passionately, moving his hands to hold the sides of your head. He let his body weight rest over you, carefully, and you sank underneath that mountainous man, sliding your nails delicately down his back. He pressed himself in between your legs, and you gasped at the sensation. 

“Please…” you begged, now holding his face, looking straight into his eyes. “Please.”

He sighed, pressing a quick kiss on your lips, as he grabbed a condom from someplace you couldn’t quite make out. Nanami opened it with his teeth, and slipped it on quickly, hovering above you. He locked eyes with you again, resting his forehead against yours, and extended his hand behind your back, accidentally pressing the deep scar you had over your spine. You gasped in pain, and he retreated his hand immediately.

“I apologize, I… I…” his expression looked equally pained, with a distinct frown between his brows. “Please, forgive me.” This wasn’t an apology about current events, and it clenched your chest to see him like this. At this moment, you knew he still carried blame for what happened years ago.

“There is nothing to be forgiven, stop apologizing,” you said, holding his head against yours, eyes piercing through his. “You never failed me. Don’t apologize anymore. Please, don’t… don’t blame yourself.” 

His gaze softened, and he rested one of his hands on your cheek. The touch was wholeheartedly delicate, like he was holding a flower petal, and it sent your heart thumping against your chest. You could feel a surge of words stirring up your throat, and decided to let them out.

“I love you,” you said, gazing intently into his eyes, “I love you completely.”

Nanami looked at you pleadingly, and immediately pressed his lips to yours, brushing away to all the pain the both of you had endured together and apart. Only then, did he separate his lips from yours to breathe out, “I love you too.”

At that moment, you were sure you had sunk in too deep, and there was no escaping it anymore. Not even if you were an expert at fleeing. 

He positioned himself and sunk in slowly, wanting to feel as every inch made its way into you. You both shared an intense and strained moan in unison, as he bottomed out, tearing you apart slowly. There was no build up whatsoever to the coil that instantly formed in your lower abdomen, ready to snap. You stretched and clenched around him, walls fluttering, and Nanami groaned against your lips, halting any movement from his hips. 

“If I move too quickly, I’ll…” he said, closing his eyes and trying to concentrate, while pressing his hands to the sides of your shoulders. You were caged in, right underneath him.

You huffed and laughed softly. “I… I know, m-me too. Let’s take it slowly…”

Nanami smiled with the corner of his lips, planting an open-mouthed kiss on your jaw and contouring your face with the tip of his nose, until your noses were beside one another. He gazed at you, glancing straight into your eyes, and you looked right back, as he started to slowly glide in and out of you, pulling entirely and bottoming completely with each movement he made. Both of you moaned and groaned into each other, as he pressed you under him from every angle possible. Your heart whirled content, and at that moment, you felt heartwarmingly held and protected by him. 

His pace started to pick up, and you were babbling incoherently against his mouth. He kissed you and pressed your head against the bed with his urgent, insistent lips, while the heat pooled in your belly began sparkling, ready to burst. 

“I-I’m… I…” you huffed, nearly out of breath.

He thrust into you sharply and picked up a quicker pace. With that, you let go, orgasm hitting you like an avalanche, while you trembled, twisted and turned under Nanami. He came right after, muffling an almost shout with his mouth against your puffy lips, and his hips were slowing right until the movements stopped.

Your mind was blank and your sight grew dark, as you brushed the hair over his forehead with your fingertips away, a dumb smile on your face. He caved, falling beside you, pulling you in for a hug as you two drifted away.

***

You woke up, and realized you were sleeping with your stomach down. You had no idea what time it was, but the throbbing headache was relentless enough for you to not care about it. Looking to your side on the bed, you realized Nanami was nowhere to be found.

“What…?” You asked yourself, getting up and almost falling down in the process. His phone, which was on the nightstand before, was also gone. As you walked towards the room’s door, you saw that his blunt blade was gone too, and there were some toasts and an omelet ready on the table, accompanied by an assortment of toppings. The other side of the table, however, was empty, and over your chair there was a note.

For some reason, you had a bad feeling about it.

What was that about regret the morning after?

[kissmypoets-hp]

📚 Fanfic Classics Series: The Lettered Special (Part One)

Some covers for @letteredlettered's beautiful fics, which have kept me company over the years. The Drarry fandom is extremely blessed to have so many talented writers and to me lettered's fics are foundational texts. I've had a number of these already saved and when I started making ebook covers for my Kindle I knew I had to make covers for these. Life-changing!!!!! I know I use the term "life-changing" often whenever I recommend fics, but it is what it is. Please, it is 3AM. Read (or re-read) these masterpieces and thank me later.

Away Childish Things Harry gets de-aged. Malfoy has to help him.

Friends at Last This can be considered the sex extra from Away Childish Things, if you like, but you don't have to have read that to enjoy this. It's porn.

He Who Must Not Be Normal Potter has fame and fortune and posh clothes and all he wants is a simple life. Draco has a flat and a cat and a steady job and all he wants is a complicated life. Which makes you think this story has something exciting like body-swapping, but it doesn’t. Instead it has Indian takeaway and a blue jumper and people wanting a whole lot of what they can’t have, discovering themselves as they discover each other.

Hope Springs Eternal (But Love Springs in the Forest, Unannounced) Draco falls into a love spring. Harry saves him! And now they’re bonded for life. Draco is horrified. Harry thinks it’s kind of neat.

By the Grace Harry is an Auror instructor. Malfoy wants to be an Auror.

art credits + comments under the cut :)

Artworks used, in order:

“L'Atre (The Hearth)” by Édouard Vuillard (1899)

"The Open Door" by Edouard Vuillard (1900-04) 💬 Away Childish Things is one of the first fic covers I made, ever. I've reread this fic often, mostly because Harry deserved a better childhood for real!! This is, like, THE kid fic ever. Seriously. I enjoy making covers for fic series because it means I get to do matching covers by the same artist (thank you sir Vuillard). I chose the first piece because it fit the visual mood of the first fic: kind of dreary, but still warm (Draco's lab, baby Harry and his terrible childhood). I also remember some adventures involving Floo powder here :) Honestly, I think Harry and Draco were lonely in their own way before the de-aging incident happened, and both Harry and Draco (in their older and younger counterparts) needed one another. It's so special to me that they were able to meet each other where the other person was without romance involved — they weren't even friends at the start but they still managed to meet each other halfway... For Friends At Last I wanted to choose a painting with a brighter mood because hello, resolution. They're friends at last (okay, title drop)! They have communicated and [insert ACT ending here because no spoilers]! They.... have sex! The same style of chair being featured in both paintings is a happy coincidence. Perhaps Sir Vuillard had an inkling that one day his artwork would be used to make ebook covers. IDK.

"Still Life" by Pablo Picasso (1918) 💬 I was thinking of Draco's apartment here. He Who Must Not Be Normal is a dynamic I can't get out of my head (and it was published in 2013!!!). Basically, all of lettered's works are so compelling. I could be wrong (I wasn't really an active participant in the fandom until this year haha), but I swear I can see lettered's influence on other fics in the fandom...

"Schizonema Dillwynii" by Anna Atkins (1853) 💬 This is actually a cyanotype of a plant LOL but it reminded me of a spring. Sometimes the process is that literal. Anyway, this fic... It kind of set the bar for magical bond fics for me??? I still can't describe why or how. But please read it if you haven't yet!!

"The Lone Tree" by Caspar David Friedrich (1822) 💬 Because of Timothy Tree... I couldn't find a good tree artwork that perfectly got the vibe (in the public domain, at least) but I like this one too.

[got-into-worm-by-mistake]

So, I'm not done with Worm yet, so I may be surprised by something, but while I will 100% agree that people who haven't read Worm (and have just read the fanfiction) shouldn't write worm fanfic, I think the degree to which 'the fanfiction gets stuff wrong' is vastly overstated.

Because things like the Wiki exist, and a pretty active fan community, getting the actual basic facts is not hard. Apart from particularly controversial bits of fanon (Aura Theory, for instance) it's rare that a fanfic, even one written by someone who hasn't read Worm, gets fundamental details about basic facts of the setting wrong. (At least as long as the person is making the effort to do that).

Where fic can trip you up is in implications, impressions and errant details regarding the motivations and personalities of secondary characters. That's where I've found the biggest 'that's not what I got from the fanfic'. And while those things can be really big deals and trip you up, I don't know if they're really as big a deal as a lot of people want to nitpick and bitch about.

Because while those things can be wrong, they're not usually wildly out of left field, but rather just - what happens in fanfic and frankly, in any sort of writing that goes on long enough (see TV shows, long running book series, etc) - an exaggeration of what's already there.

To take a recent example - the degree to which Carol Dallon gets portrayed as an abusive parent to Amy can absolutely and has absolutely been overplayed in some fanfics. Especially ones that make her trigger-happy with her magic lightsaber axe. But at the same time, while we don't see a lot of Carol in Worm, what little we do does give various impressions of the character, most of which are pretty fucking negative. The degree to which a fanfic then takes those impressions and then plays with them can start to get absurd and give someone unfamiliar with the source material false impressions, but they are derived from the actual text of Worm.

Like, I don't think Carol actually hates Amy, in the text. But I also think 'Carol hates Amy' is not a huge leap from what's in the text. It is, to paraphrase Buffy Summers, more like you take a few small steps and there you are.

This whole thing is a bit of a roundabout way of saying: That annoying fic trope of the SI into Worm who 'only reads the fanfic' as a way for the fic author to knock those who write worm fanfic without reading Worm is actually pretty stupid. Because in practice, they'd probably get along fine overall.

[takerfoxx]

I'm not traditionally a poly shipper (though I've been delving more into it as time goes by), but if there's one that I'm absolutely gaga about, as if in makes my personal top five ships and might even slot in right beneath KyoSaya and SuleMio, it's the one that almost certainly could not and should not happen in canon, but the thought of it still kinda makes me rabid with what could have been.

I am of course talking about AsuReiShin, AKA the Israfel Special.

Evangelion shipping is often a bizarre experience, especially amongst the core trio of pilots. There is just so much material among these incredibly fucked up characters, so many things that ought to be drawing them together, and yet they are all damaged in such specific ways that drive them to behave increasingly toxic, avoidant, or even abusive toward one another. They're all such hot messes of trauma and hangups that, hate to say it, the Rebuild ending of everyone essentially just making peace with one another and fucking off with Shinji hooking up with the controversial new girl that he at least doesn't have any baggage with was probably the healthiest choice, if not the most satisfying.

But even so, the reason I dig this triad specifically is because if you change even just a little bit about each character, you find the same traits that drove them apart suddenly drawing them together, and each individual pairing makes so much sense. Asuka and Shinji is the most obvious, with Asuka's aggressive bullying suddenly becoming proactive encouragement, and Shinji's meek avoidance now becoming the calm, stabilizing force that she needs. With Asuka and Rei it's similar, with Asuka's hatred of Rei's passivity now being being a drive to push Rei to experience and enjoy life and establish an identity, while Rei's gentle observation and lack of a filter would be give Asuka a much-needed source of self-reflection. And with Shinji and Rei, we've already seen how Shinji's kindness has encouraged Rei to step outside of her sheltered world and seek human connection, while also providing Shinji someone he felt was worth stepping up and fighting for.

Now, take all three of those dynamics and combine them together. You've basically got the perfect Id, Ego, and Superego situation. It's practically the adolescent Kirk, Spock, and McCoy dynamic!

Plus, there's also the other factors that would bring them together, even beyond the whole being hormonal teenagers in a stressful situation. Despite having wildly different personalities, they all had their lives destroyed by NERV, from Shinji losing his mother and being neglected by his father, to Asuka's mother losing her mind and taking her life thanks to the Evangelions, to Rei literally being created by Gendo to serve a terrible purpose and thus being robbed of ever having a life. That sort of "in the trenches" experience is exactly the sort of thing that would cause them to form bonds and seek comfort with one another, especially if they were all to learn of each other's past histories, and motivate them to stand up for one another against NERV's machinations, but ah, I'm delving into AU fanfic territory.

Point is, no, I don't think it would be wise for these three to seek out romance with one another, either as couples or all three of them together. But man, if they each just had just a little bit changed about them, can you imagine the pure emotional catharsis?

Note: I didn't really say anything about Kaworu because while I feel that he's probably the healthiest singular choice for Shinji, it's basically only with Shinji, making him his own separate deal entirely.

[ultrapoppet]

I finished tale of the body thief and I think it may have been my favorite. It was definitely more action packed than the other ones.

I have to say I've become used to the YA style of morally grey characters, where the charachter is actually morally white with some specs of grey everyone makes a big deal out of. But Lestat is not even morally grey. He's a villain who is hot and cries a lot and is the main charachter.

And respect to Anne and Rolin for going there and trusting their audience to be captivated by the hotness and the crying. And kodus to sam reid for nailing hot and emotional.

I don't think I would've stuck with these book if it wasn't for the show. I enjoy Anne's writing but I dont get these books? They seem like the YA type of book where you're supposed to want the main charachter, or want to be the main charachter, or some wishfullfiment thing but then the main charachter is a whole rapist? I mean teenage me would've probably been into it irregardless for the angst alone but that was a while ago.

Some thoughts:

The lesson of these books seems to be that you can get away with anything if you're a hot and rich white man. Everyone will continue to love you regardless of your actions. Finally some moral lesson that applies in real life.

I feel like tvl was the uwufied version of Lestat but from then on he went back to being a full on villain. Having read this book, the drop and the fight in the show make way more sense.

The rape scene is actually in charachter for post tvl Lestat when I think about it. He is a hedonistic, selfish and impulsive man. Not stopping when he's in it and only feeling some remorse after is in line with that.

Then he goes back and gives her an expensive necklace and an apology like that solves anything? But hey it's more than most women get.

Anne is from an era that people had a much more blase attitude towards rape and domestic violence. A lot of people still do despite what online spaces might lead you to believe. So it makes sense that book doesn't make as big a deal out of it as a contemporary book would.

That being said I get why people think Anne was trans. She does not seem to like women much. Definitely prefers men. But that sentiment sadly applies to a lot of straight women. I think Akasha, Claudia and Gabrielle are all good charachters. But they're all secondary.

Lestat doesn't deserve David's love but I ship it so much. Especially after he was all I'm the boss now. Yes please make him pay. Can we get dom David × bratty sub Lestat please? Where are the fanfics? Or just more bratty sub Lestat in general. I already said I think Akasha is a femdom and Louis was doing that for 77 years so he must be into domming at least a little.

What was really interesting to me was that Lestat saying he's a lier who lies to himself and others. So basically his narration is unreliable. I already knew he was probably not 6 feet tall but what else is he lying about. He could be a brunnette.

There's a section in the book where he is in the human body that I can imagine him actually being human, and the vampire lestat being his serial killer alter ego. He's just some delusional guy with a vivid imagination perpetuating the cycle of abuse. Being a vampire already seems like an allegory for rape so it fits perfectly and that was kind of the most interesting part to me.

Time for a confession: I skipped iwtv. Between the movie I had watched ages ago, the show and the excerpts I've seen around, I figured I got the gist. Should I go back and read it?

I'm going to take time off from these books and possibly tumblr. But then I might go back and finish them before season 3. Or at least finish the Lestat ones and the vampire Armand for my second fave.

[cecilysass]

Please write more of these, never stop

I love original fanfic ideas so much, but also: I could read these particular contrived scenarios told again and again and again, and I am not ashamed to admit it. Okay, I'm a little ashamed. But not very much.

Marriage of convenience (like Nuptiae Sub Rosa by @xfmaweezy and @sisterspooky1013 or All That Is Dark and Bright by @malibusunset-xf-blog). Absolute gold in every way and I will read every variation.

Scully pretending to be Mulder's 900 number girl (done recently in Dropped Call by @phillippadgettwrites)

The awkward first descent into phone sex in general, including and especially calls from the fertility clinic. This is done in an especially brilliant way in Vox Mulder: Wired and Fired by @darwin-xf.

All Milagro post-eps that force them to address "Agent Scully is already in love" without being too obvious

Almost all DeadAlive and Three Words post-eps period, because those eps just are fertile ground, no pun intended. I have a whole discussion about that and recs right here.

M&S have sex for non-romantic reasons (like, they're trying out friends with benefits, or they're trying to conceive a baby, or some other ridiculous reason). This obviously is a delightful way to show repressed feelings.

Mulder's psychic fics. I feel like there could be so many more of these. This one (Dissonance by suilven) has a killer set up and I revisit it a lot, but we should have more riffs on this concept.

All right, yes, jealousy fics, I know, very basic of me, but I just really like these. I personally like them when the angst goes really, really far. Like you want to die it hurts so bad far. That one moment in Pilgrims Creeping Towards the Dawn by @softnow where Scully hears Diana say “Fox” in the background on the phone? Inject that into my veins.

Contamination shower fics. Yeah. Enough said.

There are more than this, because actually I get wasted on tropes all the time. What do y'all like? And more importantly, DO YOU HAVE RECS FOR ANY OF THESE?

(The fics I mention here are linked here on my favorite fics doc, if you want to find them. If you haven’t read some of these, DO IT.)

[thisismyname43]

Okay so....

This is highly unlikely but I just thought of this and decided that I needed to dump this out.

What if SMG3 was under the assumption that he and SMG4 were already dating? I know this is probably stupid but hear me out. It would totally explain why he's always blushing around him and calls him "baka". I feel like SMG3 is aware of what it means and implies (being used as a term by Tsunderes to insult their love interest...I think) because he specifically ONLY calls SMG4 that, nobody else. Cuz that's his bf's special nickname for him. And what if SMG3 said "I'm not your friend!" at the end of IGBP because he was internally thinking "Yeah no I'm your boyfriend you idiot". It would also do a good job at explaining why he's so close to specifically SMG4, he's always coming inside SMG4's place asking for favors without even batting an eye. Basically anytime we see him around anyone it's usually because of SMG4, cuz SMG3 would obviously want to spend time with his boyfriend.

But would SMG4 know about this? Absolutely not! In his mind they're just friends while SMG3 is waiting patiently for SMG4 to make the first move. I can just imagine how hilarious it would be if SMG3 made hints directed at their "relationship" and have SMG4 get the biggest look of realization and pure shock plus horror on his face 💀

SMG3: "So...how are you enjoying this date? " SMG3 would ask him while they're at the park

And of course SMG4 doesn't know what the fuck is going on cuz SMG3 didn't even say it was a date, he just expected SMG4 to know when he invited them out because of their "relationship". So of course SMG4 naturally goes:

SMG4: "THIS WAS A DATE?!"

SMG3: "Yeah we've been dating for so long, I thought it was about time to finally go on a date without your dumb friends"

SMG4: "DATING!?!?!?"

I know this whole thing was ridiculous and definitely not canon, but I just thought it would be a funny and sweet idea for a fanfic or something. So if anybody wants to write something based on my idea, feel free to do so, I'd love to read it!

Anyways thanks for listening to my rambling, have a nice day!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I dated a guy I like "first", thus making my mom unable to enter a relationship with his dad? TW for possible "incest" between step-siblings (?) and abuse mention

This situation is honestly quite ridiculous and looks like straight up out of a Wattpad fanfic. But funnily/sadly this is my life rn. So yeah, definitely not a fandom post though it probably looks like it. Names are fake of course.

Basically I (mid 20sM) recently made a new friend, Jake (early 20sM). I talked with Jake a few times before, but I got his number on a party we both assisted and started to actually talk there. I already knew Jake because my mom (mid 50sF) is friends with his aunt (late 50sF). However, we just held superficial conversations and that's it. After I got his number we have been having more in-depth and longer conversations, realizing we have a whole lot in common. I like him a lot and I think I can have a chance. I don't know if this influences the judgment, but I'm a really anxious person (among other brain things) and it takes me a LOT to make friends, or even talk to someone. This was just a miracle, honestly.

The thing is that my mom is also interested romantically on his dad (late 50s?M), have been for a long time. He's a divorced father of 5 including Jake. He's a really chill dude and basically the opposite of my dad, who was a really abusive piece of shit and my mom got divorced from him when I was still young. So if she got with him, it could be her chance at having an actual healthy relationship after my dad. Though, I'm not quite sure if she has a chance (she never told me so), they're just good friends afaik.

I think the problem is becoming obvious. If she were to date his dad, that would make us step-brothers, and liking my step-brother is the weirdest thing in existence, let alone wanting to date him, even if we didn't really grew up together or anything to consider him my actual brother. On the other hand, if I dated Jake, my mom wouldn't be able to date his dad without making things between us weird.

So, WIBTA if I "ruined" my mom's possible chance at having a healthy relationship if I were to get with the guy's son, even if nothing is really confirmed? (Note: I don't want this to turn into discussion of actual incest between blood-related siblings thx<3 this is not what the question is about)

What are these acronyms?

[silverskye13]

Will enby Helsknight/trans Tanguish/top surgery scars/stubborn avoidant Welsknight in a gender crisis make it into the main story of RnS? Like, a full acknowledgment of it? Because yes, us on tumblr are aware (and happily bully RnS Wels for it) but I’m curious to how it may be brought up in the main storyline instead of rambles and drabbles. (Don’t get me wrong, those rambles and drabbles are what get me through the day. But my best friend, who isn’t in the MCYT fandom whatsoever, just caught up with RnS and doesn’t use tumblr, and besides spamming her with tumblr posts I wanna know how much I can revel in the glory of the skrunkles with her!)

That is a great question, actually. And the answer is I don't really know.

So this is one of the downsides to writing things chapter by chapter. If I had gone into this going "oh heck yeah they're trans", this would've come up in the plot way sooner. It's nice information 1) for all the trans folks reading and 2) because it has the potential to inform the themes in the narrative. This whole story is about two chief things I think: death [the inevitability of] and identity [what defines you and why]. Why should you care if literally no one else (including the universe) does? That would be so cool to speak about in terms of a trans allegory! Why do you care about gender when it's just one thing in a world of crazy things? Or at the very least, how does it inform your identity? But this is a change I made on a whim suddenly, and I know Exactly Where I Want This Plot To Go, so trans topics and allegories as Plot Points probably won't happen.

On the more technical side of introducing trans characters -- how do you do that without just dropping "oh btw they're trans" in? Like, how do you make it a relevant thing to talk about, that doesn't feel forced or shoehorned in, especially this late in the story? Probably me overthinking, but I read it done wrong so often. It gets tired. And if I ever work on my original stories, there are trans characters in there! If I can figure out how to Do It Well in a fanfic, then I can figure out how to do it in original fiction someday maybe. So I kinda wanna take the introduction seriously? I've actually been thinking about it so much I've thought about rewriting the intro to the next chapter ahaha [it already needs rewritten in general, there's a lot going on, but the intro was going to be Helsknight waking up from something, and he sleeps shirtless, and not addressing top surgery scars then would be kinda silly I think.]

I can say at the very least, Gender Avoidant Wels probably won't factor in the story much. He is a character, but I don't think he'll become Enough of a character to faithfully address something like a trans self discovery arc. At best his issues with gender might be mentioned in passing.

Sorry! I know you probably want a better answer! My answer is basically: I don't know I'm still working on it. I want it to be there, but the capacity it's there is undecided.

That being said, I've been sitting on this glorious ask since the shenanigans started and the temptation to just Do That grows every time I read it:

[coppermarigolds]

Thanks to my reliably terrible timing, I didn't get into TBB hyperfixation/fandom until basically right as the show was ending. So I know I'm like 3.5 years late to this question, but how the heck did Crosshair survive 32 rotations on that Kaminoan platform?

At first I figured, maybe he stayed alive by collecting rainwater in his helmet and catching fish with the grappling attachment on his rifle, the same one he used to save Omega and AZI. Granted, I had no idea how he could cook the fish, but I guess if you're desperate enough you could eat them raw? (Not that that wouldn't open up a whole other host of potential problems.)

But then rewatching 1x15-16, I realized he doesn't even have his helmet with him--it got left behind when they all booked it out of the training room at the end of 1x15. And he doesn't have his rifle, either. He gives it to Wrecker in the previous scene, but then in this sequence it's just...missing entirely. There is a whole lot of nothing on that platform.

So maybe he used his boots to collect rainwater instead? That at least would keep him alive for a while. A cursory google search indicates a person can survive 3-4 weeks without food, if they have enough water. 32 days already puts him past the edge of that window. He must have been nothing but skin and bones when the Empire finally picked him up--to say nothing of the mental strain of spending a month completely alone, without shelter, on a planet where it rains almost constantly (the above scene is the only shot of Kamino I can recall where it's not pouring down hurricane levels of rain). I've watched enough episodes of Survivor to know that people's morale starts to deteriorate really quickly when they're out in the cold and rain without adequate shelter for even just a couple of days. (Granted, Crosshair being a soldier would have more mental fortitude and capacity to survive inhospitable conditions than your average reality show contestant, lol, but still. A solid month of rain pouring down on your head would wear anyone down, I imagine.)

Of course, it's possible, maybe even probable, that 32 Kaminoan rotations aren't equivalent to 32 Earth days. I don't recall Star Wars ever having addressed different planets having different rotational speeds, etc, but maybe 32 days on Kamino is more like a week on Earth, or something. Even that would still be an ordeal, but obviously easier to survive than a full month.

Anyway, I'm probably overthinking it, but I am curious if anyone involved with the show ever addressed this (I know many of them are/were active on social media). Yeah, this is a Disney cartoon with 23-minute episodes that have to stay (mostly) family-friendly, but I still wish they hadn't almost entirely glossed over how physically, mentally, and emotionally taxing that whole situation would have been.

Come to think of it, Glossing Over Really Traumatic Things could have been the name of this show, but I guess that's what fanfic is for.

[ejunkiet]

ej's adventures in romance: the good, the bad, the ugly

i've had kindle unlimited for the few months, and have been on a deep deep dive into all the recs from the romance genre that i can get my grubby little paws on. I've read.... many, many books. so many.

I've made a rec list of my new fave authors in the genre before, and this is not that. I'm just gonna list what I've read, by tropes, with ratings, and you can read my full reviews on goodreads. I've gone there. there are quite a few of the booktok hits here, because they came up on rec lists, and I'm gonna give my honest opinions on them okay. my goodreads!

Before we get down and dirty, have my actual recs from the last month: Heather Guerre remains a diamond in the rough, although she can now be joined by a further two authors: Kathyrn Moon (smutty RH queen) and Zoey Draven, a surprise last minute entry that doesn't shy away from darker themes, but handles them maturely.

other recs are the obvious: Talia Hibbert, Katee Roberts, and our very own @dominimoonbeam (whose book Doors I've been reccing a LOT lately, as I love it so much, and the sequel will be out soon >:3)

Okay. lets do this. this gets long, be warned. >:3

the "grovel" trope

books where the MMC fucks up and tries to make up for their mistakes. a good read where you get a healthy dose of angst and then a lot of making up for it. can be a great cathartic read.

Cate C. Wells has a whole series dedicated to this, "the five packs", one of which I already recommended as a guilty pleasure: the lone wolf's rejected mate". Now look, these books are ridiculous, the worldstate is terrible, each pack is a dude fest that reeks of misogyny, but they're pretty fun. I've read book 1 and book 3. I want to stab the MMC of book 1 with a rusty spork. you can skip it.

the lone wolf's rejected mate however is a ride, with a broken MMC who rejects his soulmate because he thinks he's too broken (literally, his wolf tries to kill her), and then they get captured, save each other, and he builds her a treehouse, yada yada. mind the content warnings, but if you want to read something OTT that basically epitomises the craziness that is the PNR and "grovel" romance genre, read this, and hold onto your butts.

the paranormal romance genre: shifters, vampires and more

Heather Guerre's books. okay, so actual recs. She focuses on characters from working class backgrounds with a sprinkle of the paranormal thrown in, everyone is over the age of 25 (thank god, most are in their 30s), and she can really write. I won't tag Eeshley again, but the "Tooth and Claw" series was their rec and *chefs kiss*. this is still the self-published romance genre, so these books could use an editor/polish, but honestly, I'm a big fan of her writing, and have picked up all her books. (her contemporary romance is also excellent.)

post-apocalyptic trope

Claire Kent's books. Imagine Joel from the last of us as a book series. I've only read Last Light so far, which is the prequel to a longer series that explores life in america 5+ years after an asteroid collides with western europe, causing global environmental catastrophes. I'm not 100% sold on her world building, but this is a romance novel, and the way she writes the characters and their relationships are human and organic, and the most realistic I've come across so far. the world state is the walking dead, with evil biker gangs that rape and pillage. i'm assuming this is an american thing, but can't comment on what it'd be like in the UK considering we no longer exist, due to aforementioned asteroid collision. probably for the best.

omegaverse and reverse harem tropes

yeah, I thought omegaverse was just a fanfic thing too. it's not, and it is super prevalent in het romance. it was never really my thing in fanfic, and the fact it is not a shifter thing was very surprising to me, as knots/packs/heat/rut still exist, but it's just humans with animalistic traits. I kept on waiting for the motorcycle gang in 'baby and the late night howlers' to turn into wolves, and they never did.

So Kathryn Moon writes some delicious reverse harem books. I read the first of monsterfucker series 'a lady of rooksgrave manor' years ago, and liked it, although there wasn't enough plot for me to continue. she writes excellent smut. Seriously, just really, really good smut. BIG FAN. I've been making my way through her 'Sweetverse' series, which has more connections and actual relationships between the characters, and polymances, and I recommend starting with Lola + the millionaires, if you can handle a little omegaverse. mind the content warnings, this is a book about recovering from trauma, which happened in the first book (baby's book, although offscreen. Lola has a lot of flashbacks in italics.)

Otherwise, you can stick with the monsterfucker books! I bought her latest monster series off of regular kindle, instead of KU, and I'm really excited to read it hehehe

"mars need more women" and "fated mate" tropes

hehehe okay HERE WE GO. these books are all about women ending up on planets where due to some sort of cataclysmic event - disease, mostly - 80% of the female population of the planet has died. now as we're not here for angst, the arrival of these women are usually due to some other species abducting them, and they are then "rescued" or recovered after a crash on metaphorical mars, which needs a better sex ratio to ensure the survival of the species.

this trope is coupled with "fated mate" tropes, where basically the rescued/recovered women end up with a devoted alien husband, who yearns until he can win her over (we're all about consent here folks)

the ice planet barbarians series by ruby dixon. this is basically na'vi aliens that crashlanded on an ice planet 250 odd years ago, and have made it their home, living in tribal colonies. to survive in this planet's toxic atmosphere, they've taken in a native parasite called a 'khui' which helps their bodies adapt to the climate and atmosphere. the women in the books also receive the same parasite to survive (they're given the choice), and this is the basis of the "mate bonds" formed throughout the series.

now book 1 is a rocky start, and the weakest of the series. I nearly put it down because of the first 20 pages. you can skip the first 20 pages. it basically recounts the abduction of the women from their home planet, and mistreatment by their captors (tw for sexual assault of a side character, not explicit). the ship malfunctions, and the women "cargo" are dropped onto the ice planet, where they are found by the not-na'vi, who are called sa-khui, because of the parasite.

now the rest of the series is about adapting to life on an alien planet, understanding the culture of the sa-khui, and gaining a devoted alien hubby. look, I read four books in a week. they're fun, they're exciting, the smut is good, and it's an easy read. it's also written by an experienced and practiced author, as the topics are handled maturely, it doesn't take itself too seriously, and it has great representation.

(one of my favourite books in the series, book 7, is centred around Lilah, who was born deaf and had a cochlear implant that was surgically removed during the abduction. the book focuses on her struggling to adapt to life on the planet, aided by a sa-khui that rescues her and learns ASL to communicate, and it's an excellent read okay)

I'd say read book 1 (maybe skipping first 20 pages, or even to part 2) for context, read book 2 (my favourite of the series omg), and then pick and choose from there!! I've read 1,2,4,7, and I'm gonna end up coming back for more hehehe.

"choosing theo" is another in this genre, but it didn't quite vibe with me. it leans into the 'rescued human ends up on a planet that needs women for propagation', with a matriarchal society where the men go to husbandry school to learn how to please women, and all residents of the planet are required to participate in three month long marriages to try to find potential mates to propagate the species. the premise is a fun one, but the first book is not the strongest, and I didn't continue from there. (another rusty spork for the MMC...)

dothraki in space trope

we're at the end of my trope list! I liked the ice planet barbarian series a lot, and I'd kept on seeing the Horde Kings of Dakkar by Zoey Draven recommended, and they are good. (thank you woofs >:3) think dothraki from GoT in space; humans live in small, poorly maintained colonies on the Dakkar planet, where they aren't allowed to hunt or damage the earth. offenses are punishable by death. these books lean into the captive trope, and handle the issues of the worldstate and navigating cultural differences super well, with a heavy dose of consent and BAMF heroines that rise up to their situation and make a place for themselves in their new (objectively better) lives.

i'm on book two now, and I love the maturity in the characters and the writing (which I did not find in 'choosing theo'), and they're an excellent romp. fantastic rec, really glad I picked this up >:3

am I finally going to take a break from my reading binge now? I keep on saying I will, and then not doing that ahahahaha. my kindle library is still stuffed full, mainly with other books from my fave authors above, but also some nice space horror to round it off.

next on my list is gonna be either 'Haunt, Heart, Havoc', a horror romance that I've been meaning to read forever, or 'Dead silence', which is aliens meets titanic in space. >:3 if you read all of this, KUDOS TO YOU, have a lovely sunday ahahaha!

[vsyrworld]

get to know my favorite driver's ship

this was made by me and for me and i wrote fanfic about them!!!

(fyi; i started watching f1 in 2015 so ofc you guys KNOW what my FIRST and ULTIMATE ship)

(older f1 ships: )

Brocedes :D (childhood friends, teammates, rivals, anything but a lover - crofty 2021)

OH COME ON. I will write an essay about their history. BUT ANYWAY, despite their toxic year in 2015/2016, I still adore how young nico and lewis friendship or whatever they had in Greece back then and I still keep this ship alive until the 2021 season. Their battle on the track was BEYOND TOXIC, yet their battle off the track (media drama) is HILLAARIOUS. How come Lewis accidentally spills out, the name that shouldn't be spoken for Half of DECADE. God both of them are dramas king. NICO PODCAST omg the talk with Alain prost and they compared his vs Senna battle with HIS AND Lewis's battle PLUS when Nico's storytelling his "friendship" history in ITALY at the SPONSOR EVENTS *CRIED* and lewis always mentioned how he loves ice cream and do cheating day in imola and monza BECAUSE IT WAS NICO WHO INTRODUCE THE FOOD THERE. ugh I hate and love them at the same time. (I do include some Seb/NICO too because I like see Lewis getting rilled up)

2. Kimi and Seb (I ADORE THIS A LOT)

my calm and serenity wise iconic ferrari couple. I feel like Kimi was the rock ice and water for Seb to prevent him from burnout because of ferrari. during 2017-2018, Seb pushed hard (same like Charles) and yet the car reliability fuck his championship standing. and kimi (--kimi was the last ferrari champion hiks) kimi just so attentive to seb and I genuinely like both of them being rebels to whole ferrari tradition (like they don't do rollercoaster thingy, they DON'T master Italian, they just become their self and being so comfortable in their own bubble, fuck world). I had noticed also Seb (and Gio) is the only teammate that can make Kimi laugh. I just super super adore them!

3. Maxiel (TRADITIONALSHIP! I REFUSE OTHER SHIP FOR MAX BESIDE DANIEL. I REFUSE!)

ugh should I explain them? THE CHAOTIC GAYEST ENERGY IN WHOLEEE 2016 GRIDS COME ON. I love how Daniel basically took young rookie Max under his arm and just had fun on and off the track with It? The biggest flop was when Max was just so hotheaded and they crashed in Baku. I thought their relationship gonna be stranded but GUESS WHAT? MAXIEL IS STILL ALIVE UNTIL NOW HELLO? and their relationship is so real not only for the camera but also out the camera. The other highlight moment is when Max is already 'too big' daniel really steps down from RBR because he knows, Max will outshine him, and he knows (what he learned from brocedes too) that it's better to go the other way.

(newer)

4. Dando (COMFORT SHIIP Not romantically also)

I thought daniel was max soulmate but LANDO excuse me? They can share daniel If they want. i just love how lando becomes so silly and blushes like school teenager around Daniel. i love how they INFLUENCE each other. I think because I feel nostalgic with them because they really similar with Maxiel in 2017 era, just one season before Daniel goes to renault, Maxiel was strained on thin paper. Dando other hands, well Daniel mostly, struggled in McLaren (with the papaya fans also still adore Carlos that time and refuse to let go him) plus Lando was shining bright just like Max 2016. Again, daniel he stepped OUT (this time). I guess, that similarity made me miss maxiel too.

5. last one C2 (Charlos) gosh, please!! ultimate!!!

loving and adoring them was expected though. It wasn't because they're both handsome (I already know Carlos was goofy ever since his Renault era so I never consider him as a handsome man) BUT DANG BOY, RED ON CARLOS WAS SOMETHING ELSE? RED ON CARLOS, BLACK ON CARLOS WAS SAKDAJSKDFHLKJSAFHKJAF.

-- okay back to the c2. It was a slow build okay? I realized that they are special during Carlos's first podium, Monaco 2021. Charles WAS LIKE ME. Blushing giggling, shy gazes toward Carlos. they are so endearing. Both of them are the victims of the Ferrari team. But I think they both understand each burden (Charles being the predestinated one, and Carlos had to prove his talent bcs he is a two times world champion son) plus, the way Ferrari screwed Charles in 2019. The team was cracked but with Carlos, I didn't expect this cursed team is heal :"D (Crying) and Charles become more relaxed, more enjoyed, even his coping mechanism is with laughter and Carlos just matches his energy. Idk , they gave me... a relationship through ups and downs.

and I realized there are so many people trying to pit them against each other, their fans are constantly arguing about who is the best and better driver, always dragging one of them down, but guess what is Carlos and Charles's response? it's completely differs from real life. They knew and fucking see it their fans tension. Carlos's anger to the Spanish media has already proven enough he had enough of these things. Charles also said in an interview that "what he saw about him and Carlos is nowhere true". they are the best PR relationship couple out there, but I also can see a genuine, how they know each other so weell. How Charles kept the football game updated just because of Carlos, how Carlos knows his favorite food, how they had their own internal jokes,

they are both soo lowkey on the camera during and outside the race. and I think that Is why people never hype them like carlando or everyone's favorite childhood rival to lovers lesttapen. And I thought they didn't really hang out with each other that much but WHAT WAS THAT SUMMER BREAK? HUH? YOU IN MALORCA AND WENT TO SOUTHERN FRENCH? What were the matching Instagram feeds color and aesthetic at New York? WHAT WAS THE THING ABOUT PASTA CARBONARA UN LUNGA NON PENNE? WHAT WAS THAT THING CHARLES SLEPT ON THE FLOOR just to accompany Carlos watching World Cup? The dolomites? The Sardinia?

there are soo many thing that they keep it so low-profile and under camera, and yet their conversation is so domestic.

[horizon-verizon]

Phoebe Campbell saying about Baela and Rhaena “There’s a little bit of tension because of their separate upbringings, Baela was raised with grandma & grandpa, Rhaena by stepmom and half siblings. Rhaena feels quite a lot of resentment there.”

So... that garbage fanfic wants to put the dragon twins against each other ?? They aren’t Arya and Sansa, Baela and Rhaena actually love each other, and unlike Sansa, Baela never bullied her sister. And why would Rhaena resent the fact that she had to live with her stepmom and half siblings ??

This is if--and only IF--Phoebe is correct in how the show will decide to characterize Rhaena, and since they literally acted the character, shot all the scenes, and haven't gone on record with bad takes, I think we don't have much a reason to suspect otherwise.

Link to the article that came out today and what anon refers to:

BranwynHlfwitch over at Twitter has a whole thread pointing out other stuff how Ryan Condal has never had a great grasp on the plot or really of history & historians.

I think that part of it is they are trying to develop these characters for their larger roles they're planning during the Dance & the way they decided to go about that is to create conflict b/t the fan fav sisters. And I think they might try to to argue or imply that she is resentful bc of not just second-son syndrome, but basically Baela was picked by their grandparents to be closer and let Rhaena be. Why not both of them, if they are already seeming to break tradition? It will likely folow the theme of silent rejection the show allows the audience to quickly assume from episode 6, where Rhaena bemoans Daemon ignoring her bc of her not hatching an egg...which I already talked about.

Baela--for a very dumb reason--becomes the "ward" of the Velaryons & Rhaenys wants Corlys to name Baela as his heir...presumably without consulting Daemon, the girl's father or Viserys, the head of the house Baela is actually a part of and who would determine how his house's possible heirs inherit what over other candidates...bc Baela & Rhaena are both technically still in line for the throne though they aren't titled as princesses. Just way down and the claims would get stronger the more people before them die...which we already see in the bk.

Anyway, Baela is seemingly older than Rhaena instead of being her twin as by canon; she has a dragon where Rhaena does not; she is, bc she is older, taken to Driftmark to learn the ways of a leader as if she might become the head of a house or whatever even though we also know that Corlys has definitely not named her his heir by his & Rhaenys' conversation in the last episode (so for 6 years why is Baela there without being named when they could just visit each other--her and Rhaenys--by ship and dragonback [pic below] idk, the spectacle of it?).

And while Rhaena loved her dad, loved her stepsiblings/1st cousins-once-removed & I believe that Rhaenyra was a great stepmother to her, because the show did not show us their lives, they will take advantage of that and present us with a lot of stuff like this--breaking lore and going along with the breakage to build their own tale but also sometimes not showing a logical progression from that point of breakage [again, lok to the link abt cradle-bonding].

Yes, there's the argument that Daemon is merely worried over Rhaena's being singled put and left out or belittled, sidelined, for not having a dragon as he felt being a second son/child even with his dragon...but again, look to my post about cradle-bonds and the history of dragon bonds he supposedly knows and it becomes still dumb when he still ends up doing the very thing he's supposed to have feared for his daughter, to her.

Would it have helped if the writers actually developed these people's lives before the Dance and actually think through their plot decisions if they planned to make Rhaena-Daemon's deal this, absolutely! But we have what we have.

Show!Rhaena could come to just resent her sister for all this perceived favoritism.

I may be wrong, who knows.

[tleeaves]

5, 11, 12, 13, 16, 17, 18, 19

Gimme all the deetz...

Oh hi <3 thanks for the ask, lovely!

5. Which character did you choose as your first ghoul and why? Jin because I liked his cold personality and thought it could use some warming up with story/character relationship development 🙈 I'm a sucker for the trope of mean-person-does-not-like-you-but-you-persist-and-against-all-odds-they-do-actually-end-up-liking-you. You can see this reflected even irl with some of the friendships I've pursued and also with characters I like in other fictional sources.

11. Top five favourite characters? Aaaaa okay maybe like Haru, Sho, Tohma, Rui, and that random unnamed Darkwick janitor character!

12. What's your favourite character from each house? These questions are so difficult for someone who loves basically the whole entire cast 😭 okay, Frostheim: Tohma, Vagastrom: Sho, Jabberwock: Haru, Sinostra: Taiga, Hotarubi: Subaru, Obscuary: Rui, and Mortkranken: BOTH I can't- I just- 🥺 just look at them! There's not nearly enough fanfic for Yuri but I absolutely love Jiro too, they're both sooo ! Argh I'll go with Jiro for this question.

13. What's your least favourite character from each house? Such tricky questions. Frostheim: Lucas, Vagastrom: Leo, Jabberwock: Towa, Sinostra: Romeo, Hotarubi: Haku, Obscuary: Edward, and that leaves Mortkranken: Yuri 😔

16. What's your favourite house overall? YOUR HONOUR, I REQUEST A DIFFERENT QUESTION, THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE. Umm maybe Jabberwock? I love the house's domain, they have a pretty charming captain, Towa's so adorable and compassionate and funny, and Ren is a ray of sunshine (I want to do movie nights with him). And I think the Jabberwock mission in the game remains my favourite! I think their dynamics with each other are interesting and super entertaining.

17. Which house would you be sorted into? OMG I didn't know there was a house sorting quiz. Oop. I got Frostheim! That was surprising.

18. Which character(s) would you get along with the most? You know, I'm not really sure 🤔 everyone's pretty busy with something or other and has their own priorities. But probably Rui, actually? I tend to be the flirty friend as well and I love when people play along! (On that note, I'd probably get along with Haku too, but he's got such suspicious behaviour). Would definitely get along with Lucas and Kaito, they're some of the friendliest and loveliest ghouls, honestly. I'd probably get along with Tohma too, though idk if we'd actually hang out heaps? One of those friendships where we really vibe despite seeing each other maybe once a week or fortnight, same with Haru.

19. Which character(s) would you actively avoid? Jin. Romeo. Taiga. Leo. Edward. The professors. Also that guy from the Darkwick general store. Jin is only because I hate being told what to do unless I really like the person and they're nice about it. Romeo because my ego could not take all those insults, I already have rather poor confidence in my self-image - and he's also ruthless and incredibly self-serving, and I don't even mean this in a bad way, I admire his character, I just could not be around him. Especially if he's so pretty. I would not last. Taiga is unhinged and I think for a while I'd be genuinely scared of him, as much as I like him now (because of you). Leo is... the greatest threat to my life lmao I do not need to be dragged across social media or have gossip collected on me. Edward creeps me out. The professors are suspicious. Guy from the general store is also creepy.

[immaturityofthomasastruc]

Something I dislike about Chloe’s damnation is how her good actions never have that “selfish” part of them

My main examples is Zombisue and Queen wasp

She sacrificed herself to save ladybug and apologizes at the end, saving ladybug is selfless since she genuinely trusts ladybug will save them all (LIKE CHAT NOIR DOES, she’s doing the same chat does and is meant to and she doesn’t gain anything from apologizing since she already looks good in ladybug’s eyes for saving her

And in queen wasp she knows she’ll won’t be getting the miraculous back but she gives it up because of her devotion to ladybug

If the writers wanted to make her seem evil and selfish they would have given her something to gain out of this situations like money or fame, not the sympathy of her idol, is like the writers don’t know how to make actions have a selfish intentions to them and it shows with Marinette

Marinette has done this multiple times (for example she goes to Shanghai under the excuse of following Adrien which is extremely selfish) and the writers never seem to notice

I once read a fanfic called “bad for business” about a side villain of a show (which show ain’t important) not joining the main villains which invade he’s territory and basically plan to destroy the whole place.

The villain constantly makes deals and promises with selfish goals knowing full well most of he’s Allie’s might end up weakened, in Jail or dead at the end, and everything he does is selfish even if they aren’t flat out evil (I will help them in this turf war so they will help ME in this turf war, I will give them valuable information so they will destroy our mutual enemies for ME, I will kill this terrorist so I can frame it for the murder of another goon I murdered)

And the fan fic makes this clear every single scene, he does have good traits like caring for he’s partner and trying (emphasis on trying) to console a girl (which would have been he’s enemy in the canon show) after the two think a friend of hers died in front of their eyes but even till the end it’s shown how he’s never done a single selfless thing in the whole history and that’s why despite everything he did on the fic and what he wanted to achieve and by the means he did, he still rooted for him, because he was evil and nothing was hiding it (specially not the writer)

Meanwhile miraculous doesn’t know the difference between a selfish and selfless action, a fanfic does something better than miraculous, a fanfic of a series far worse than miraculous is more aware of good and evil than a children’s show

God I love ranting about miraculous mistakes and double standards

I feel like the writers have no idea what an anti-hero is, because characters are either completely perfect and can do no wrong, or they're complete monsters who are pure evil.

The show tries to write characters like Chloe, Gabriel, and Felix in a morally gray light, yet the writers always try to either downplay their actions or act like they've been good from the start.

The whole point of writing an anti-hero is that it allows you to explore stories in a way that differ from the usual moral paragons people are used to seeing in superhero media. These kind of characters usually find ways to accomplish their goals that don't allign with the beliefs we have. It makes us think about whether the ends justify the means, or how thin is the line between being a hero and being a villain.

But this show doesn't do that sort of thing. When a character does something, it's either good or bad, no matter the consequences it has. I'm not saying we need complex writing on the same level as Breaking Bad for this show, but if they're going to try and discuss topics like redemption for past deeds, you need to draw a line and show what kind of things are okay to do, what things aren't okay to do, and why actions are viewed in a certain way.