#x files fanfic
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What’s going on in the world that made so many new people start the x files recently (including myself who started it last October) where did we all come from? Does the world go to shit and our preprogrammed instinct is to go “hey alien show from the 90s!”
#fox mulder#dana scully#the x files#x files#msr#txf#msr fanfic#x files fanfic#walter skinner#gillian anderson
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here's all my Aletheia illustrations ✨ this fic, no matter how flawed, is still my child that I birthed after prolonged labor (about a year long I think), so I'm proud of it 😌
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🥏 Where to find good XF fanfics
👽 On Tumblr
@lilydalexf has an encyclopedic knowledge of fics and continues to be an invaluable resource. You'll find a boatload of themed fic lists, individual rec posts and helpful answers to anon asks.
@txf-fic-chicks-blog seven years of almost daily recs, with well-written blurbs and a lot of fun, run by @kateyes224 and @piecesofscully. Look out for their themed days: "Casefile Monday", "Tumblr Tuesday", "Editor's Pick Wednesday", "Post-Ep/Missing Scene Thursday", "Novel Length Friday", "Smut Sunday", and the very cool "Because You Watched"
@msrlibrary a well-tagged library of MSR fics; each entry includes a short excerpt and a nicely chosen image from the show.
@201daysofxfiles a rewatch blog by fandom veteran @wendelah. Each episode in season 1-7 is paired with its own fic rec post.
@enigmaticxbee an aesthetically pleasing and neatly organized rewatch blog that is packed with great content, including excellent fic rec lists categorized by season, story type, trope, and more. Each episode guide sometimes features related fic recs.
@thatfragilecapricorn30 posts one fic rec every Friday, accompanied by a nice writeup.
@randomfoggytiger curates many fic rec lists sorted by often fun and creative categories.
@cecilysass has a google doc titled "fics I love", which is a fantastic fic list categorized by story type, complete with thoughtful blurbs. She's also shared two episode-related fic rec lists on Tumblr: here and here.
@pookie-mulder writes a monthly fic journal with good recs.
**self-promo plug** I post fic recs on my Tumblr blog @fine-nephrit under #nephrit's fic rec. Plus, I reblog others' fic recs that I come across!
👽 Rec Communities
XF Book Club: the best thing ever, an absolute gem that deserves to be preserved for posterity. During its run, 270 fics were recced and discussed in depth here. The community's intelligent and insightful comments on this blog are sometimes even more enjoyable to read than the fics themselves.
The Fic Filter (xf tag): well-curated selections with short blurbs.
Multifandom Het Recs (xf tag): a major rec site's xf section that offers nice "why this must be read" writeups. @het-reccers
Crack Van (xf tag): another major rec site with a big xf section, featuring endless recs and blurbs
Fancake (xf tag): another major rec community's xf section boasting an extensive thematic tagging system
👽 Personal Blogs
Emily Shore aka Naraht: meta essays, fanvid recs, fic recs—great stuff aplenty
Bad for the Fish aka Scarlet Baldy: fantastic fic list paired with highly enjoyable reviews and analyses of the fics she's read. @badforthefish
Ramblings of a Mind Untamed: reviews of a dozen or so classic fics
xxSKSxx XF Fanfic Recs: still active in 2024! @xxsksxxx
X-Libris: more of a fic library, this is the best place to download nicely-formatted ebooks of pre-AO3 oldies. What I love most is the incredibly detailed and extensive tagging system.
👽 Individual Rec Lists with good writeup
Character Manifesto - Dana Scully: a character analysis and 10 Scully-centric fic recs, categorized by "best of .." selections. Amazing format and choices!
Character Manifesto - Fox Mulder: same format as above for Spooky
bachlava's awesome fic rec essays, covering classic fics and slash fics
ShipRecced blog's classic MSR fics and newer MSR fics recs
luminary's 16-fic rec post
RivkaT recs fics and writers @rivkat
Anna Otto's favorite stories
Syntax6's rec list on her site, great rec list on Tumblr and FTF rec list @syntax6
👽 90s Old School Rec Sites
The Basement Office - Musea: a treasure trove of extensive fic lists with lovely written blurbs, recced by a group of talented writers from back in the day
The Other Side - Fanfic Recs from Beyond the Grave: a large collection of 'scary' or 'spooky' story recs with nice blurbs. Beautiful web design.
the Rookery - Favorite Authors: nice commentary on a list of classic fic writers
X-Files Fanfiction 101: an intro guide to fic categories and what to read for each
The Primal Screamers: a fun site run by a mailing list that hosts fic recs with blurbs, and a 'Coffee Talk' section full of delightful discussions of canon
Idealists Haven - Elemental Fanfic Archive: an archive with rec blurbs
Chronicle X: a large, well-organized archive with blurbs, plus a 'Can We Talk' discussion section of novel-length fics, plus a total of 46 author interviews. Simply incredible!
👽 Special Mention
The X-Files Lost and Found: a fic finder message board that is miraculously still very active today—How wonderful! Its FAQ page hosts a huge collection of well-categorized themed fic lists (not recs), including "Classics (or, Your Fanfic Education is Not Complete Until You've Read ...)".
Where do you find your next read? What did I miss? Reblog and share your favorites!
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After work
Fox Mudler x F!Reader summary: You decide to make the unwinding after work a bit more interesting for Mulder warnings: teasing, mentions of smut, implied smut. Just something short, sweet and fun for the end of the year. word count: 2.2K a/n: this is me trying to get out of my writing/art block. ALSO, first time writing Mulder! Thank you @chelseasdagger for editing this!
You lay on the small couch in Mulder’s apartment, resting on your side, turned to face the room as the gentle light from the TV shines onto your face. Some low budget horror movie plays quietly on the small screen, but to be completely honest, you don’t pay much attention to it, choosing to have it on as a means of killing time. You usually finish your work before Mulder does, even on the off chance he might leave the office at a normal hour. Killing time until you get to see him in the evening wasn't an unusual thing for you now you didn't mind it.
A cheap gag in the movie makes you sigh quietly before you look away, glancing up at the small window above Mulder's desk. You frown, suddenly realizing the late hour.
You check the time, squinting at the clock on the bookshelf next to the sofa, before glancing at the phone on the desk.
The thought of calling him passes by your mind, but you brush it off quickly. You weren't too worried about him, not today, the case him and Scully have been currently working on didn't seem particularly dangerous or high risk, at least not from what he's been able to share with you over the phone.
The subtle sound of house keys on the other side of the door to the apartment makes you smile, perking your head up and turning to face him.
“Well, well, well…look who's here.”
He speaks first, pretending he wasn't expecting to see you there.
“You mind telling me how you managed to get into my apartment, ma’am?”
Rolling your eyes at the tease, you turn away to face the TV again.
“I broke in using the keys you gave me.”
You explain without taking your eyes off of the movie, snuggling into the pillow harder while he pulls the work jacket off his shoulders and makes his way over to the couch.
“Well, damn.”
He mumbles quietly, his usual monotone voice makes the corner of your lips pull up slightly.
“I need to be more careful about handing out my spare keys, huh? I mean, what is this? It's like anyone can just walk in, lay on my couch and make themselves at home.”
“Oh, anyone?”
You raise your eyebrow, glancing up at him in an accusatory manner.
“Well…”
His lips push into a small pout.
“You got me, I give up.”
You breathe out a small laugh as he leans down, pressing his lips to the side of your head gently before moving away. He loosens the tie around his neck and tosses it off to the side before he unbuttons the top couple of buttons on his shirt.
“So…”
He starts after a moment once you pull your legs closer to your chest to make room for him on the couch by your feet. He sits down, lifting your legs up slightly just to rest them gently in his lap.
“What are we watching?”
He asks, fingers slowly rubbing up and down your calves.
“Ummm…not sure. Killer clowns, I think?”
“UUUuu, spooky.”
Mulder hums, unimpressed, and you chuckle at the reaction. There's a pause and you both actually pay attention to the movie for a short while.
“Aliens?”
You glance over at him, catching the small smile when you ask the work related question.
“No um… no, it was vampires, actually.”
He explains and you nod.
“Real ones?”
The smile widens as you seem genuinely interested. At least somewhat.
“Well…technically, yeah, you could say that but, you know.”
“No evidence?”
He shrugs.
“No evidence.”
“I mean, it's a possibility, right? You've handled cases like that before.”
You state, and Mulder nods, agreeing with you, his hand slowly rubbing over your thigh. He turns away from the TV, now looking directly at you.
“Do you think I should remind you that that is classified government information, you technically know nothing about, huh?”
“Oh, I'm soooorry.”
You talk back, head now propped up in your hand, face turned away from the movie you found yourself no longer interested in watching.
“Guess I just overheard it when you were talking in your sleep.”
“Hey!’
Mulder reacts immediately, and you can't help the laugh leaving your body when he pulls you up and into his lap with a slightly offended expression.
“.... I talk in my sleep?”
He asks, hands rubbing over your lower back while you throw your leg onto the other side of him, straddling his thighs in effect.
“Oh, not at all.”
You mumble quietly, pushing a couple strands of hair that fell forward onto his forehead away from his face with a soft smile, and he offers a small one in return.
“You know what? If I didn't know you any better, I would've said that didn't sound too convincing.”
He points out in the quiet, monotone voice, and you shrug your shoulders softly.
“I mean, I could’ve just read your mind, and you'd never know.”
“Oh, yeah?”
He asks with a slightly raised eyebrow.
“You're changing your confession now?”
He teases in a typical Mulder manner, and your smile grows bigger as you tilt your head to the side, letting him continue after a moment.
“So what-what you're trying to say is I work a case all week, and then I come back home to relax, and now I have another X-file on my hands? Is that what you're trying to say?”
You smirk, glancing up at him innocently.
“Oh, I'm not trying to say anything except that I missed you.”
He smiles so big, his teeth shine in the light of the TV screen.
“Me? You, missed ME?”
You hum quietly, confirming your confession as you rub your hand up along his chest.
“Well, that's good to know. Why didn't you call to tell me earlier, hmm?”
“Didn't want to interrupt you at work.”
You explain yourself, and he shakes his head gently before whispering your name softly.
“You are the only person who I want to interrupt my work, okay?”
His thumb brushes over your cheek, and you lean into the touch, staring into those dark brown, puppy dog eyes.
“Okay.”
“So you missed me?”
He goes back to your earlier point, and you breathe out a small laugh.
“I need to try and remember that next time I'm at the office, huh?”
“I mean.”
You brush your hand over his shoulder and down his arms.
“I wouldn't complain.”
You shift your position in his lap, and he grunts, feeling the weight of your body now directly between his legs, his grip on you tightening slightly.
“Oh, but I know you have your vampires and aliens and things you need to deal with over there.”
You speak softly, your fingers gently tracing over the shirt. Your head tilts to the side slightly as you try to make sure your words actually reach him. His eyes jump around your face as you talk, stopping at your lips for longer than they would in a usual conversation before he tilts his head down, eyes now fixed on the spot where your body presses against him between his legs. His hand moves up your back, pushing at the hem of your shirt.
“Hey.”
You start again when he doesn't respond.
“Earth to Mulder?”
“Hmm?”
He mumbles, questioning what you've just said, clearly too lost in the situation to pay actual attention to what's being said.
“When did you stop listening?”
“What?”
He blinks a couple of times before frowning, offended that you’d question his ability to listen to you…under the circumstances.
“Oh, I actually heard everything, for your information.”
He states confidently, and you raise your eyebrows, doubting his words.
“Oh, you did?”
He nods, slipping his hand right under your shirt, his palm flat against your bare back now.
“Yep, everything, yeah. Loud and clear.”
Still slightly out of it, he nods again quickly, doing his best to sound as convincing as possible despite the evidence you feel, oh so clearly, pressing against your body from underneath you.
“So, what did I say?”
You push.
“You said you missed me.”
He starts, and you can't really argue with that.
“And then you also mentioned how I am the best looking federal agent you ever dated, I'm pretty sure.”
Not giving you much time to disagree, or call him out, he raises you off of his lap, swiftly helping you lay back down on the couch. You lay under him as he leans closer to you, his hands playing with the hem of your shirt, his eyes stuck on yours.
“I don't think I said that.”
You frown.
“But you said you missed me.”
He points out again.
“And you called me an X-File.”
You mumble, unimpressed, and he laughs, shaking his head before it hangs low above your chest.
“I mean, you could argue that was a compliment? Maybe?”
You roll your eyes, a smile back on your face as you decide to let him have it this one time.
“Okay, yeah, that's what I'll do.”
You glance down, slowly raising your knee up, nudging at the bulge in his gray slacks.
Mulder hums quietly, grinding his hips down slightly as a response to your move. His hands linger over your body, one now under your shirt, the other on the side of your neck.
“Yeah?”
He asks, his voice soft, his touch gentle but impatient.
“Yeah.”
“Yeah and-”
He leans down, pressing his lips against your neck, and you tilt your head back slightly in response, a silent invitation for him to continue.
“I think I deserve some extra credit.”
He mumbles, his words breaking up between the kisses. He slowly moves lower and lower down your torso as he pulls the fabric of your shirt up to expose more and more of your skin, until finally pulling the fabric off and over your head. He tosses the shirt off to the side and his lips find their way back to your body, right above the waistband of your jeans.
“Credit for?”
You glance back down, your hands pushing through his hair when he looks back up into your eyes, lost in the moment, in the kisses and in the feel of your body under his.
“Creativity?”
You laugh, head falling back down onto the couch, fingers still in his hair as you feel his lips back on your body.
“Yeah, okay, I'll give you that.”
You purr softly. As gentle as possible, you scratch at the back of his neck, the short hair prickling the tips of your fingers softly. He lets out a satisfied hum, resting his head right below your belly button, facing you with his eyes directly on yours. You push your hips up slightly, feeling his fingers brush over the sides of your body, and he glances down between your legs before turning his head up to look towards your face again.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah, you get extra points, Agent Mulder. Now c'mere.”
Instructing him to move closer to you, you push your lips against his when his face is inches away from yours. He moans into the kiss, and in response you do the same as the kiss deepens more and more. Feeling his touch firmer on your body now, you reach down, palming the bulge through the fabric of his pants. There's a loud grunt, he breaks the kiss, his lips parted, eyes closed as his lips curl up into a big smile.
“Well, good job, me.”
He mumbles quietly, tracing his hand down your body, fingers curling under the waistband of your jeans while his big, brown eyes open and find yours once again.
“I think maybe-maybe I should try to earn more of these points, huh?”
Mulder asks, his thumb rubbing over the skin above your jeans.
“I think you really should.”
You agree quickly, nodding and pushing your hips up slightly at the same time.
“You got any-”
He pauses for a moment, placing a wet kiss on the skin right under your belly button, and you feel the warmth between your legs grow significantly stronger.
“Any idea how I could do that?”
He kisses the same spot again, then moves slightly lower, then lower and lower again before working the zipper open. Slowly pulling the fabric down your thighs, he brushes his lips over the newly exposed skin, and a moan slips past your lips.
He chuckles loudly at the sound, shaking his head when you look back down with a soft smirk.
“Oh, Agent Mulder, I think you know very well how you can do that.”
“Oh, yeah?”
He asks, in a lighter tone this time.
“I mean, I'm pretty much just guessing here, I-”
He quickly glances between your two bodies.
“I have precisely zero idea what I am doing here right now.”
You scoff loudly, pushing his face away and letting your head fall back onto the couch again.
“Too much sarcasm, too little action there, Mulder.”
You squirm impatiently under his body, hungry from the promise of pleasure.
“Copy that.”
He nods quickly, the big smile never leaving his face for even a second before he buries his face between your legs.
#x files#the x files#x files fanfic#fox mulder#fox mulder x reader#fox mulder fanfiction#david duchovny#fox mulder smut#mulder x reader#mulder x you
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kinds of fics that I need more of in my life
Skinner catches Mulder and Scully. doing what? idc - having sex, passing notes, concealing tax fraud, all of the above. just catches them
fics that let M&S get seriously pissed off at each other. bonus if it's over something so dumb
Detour but they make it to the conference (or have to go to another conference bc they missed it)
someone accidentally / slightly harms Scully and Mulder flies off the handle
fics set in that phase where they both Know and know that the other Knows so it's just a matter of when and not if but they're still dancing around it
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And Death Shall Have No Dominion by Jean Helms is having a moment on here, @thexfileswithoutcontext, @deathsbestgirl and @fringephile have all posted/asked about it and I absolutely love that this classic fic has stuck in so many people's brains. It's so good and is such a good reminder of how lucky we are to have literal decades worth of brilliant fic writing in this fandom. I'd love to know what other fics have lodged in people's brains in the same way!
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Undercover Smolder Mulder: Pine Bluff Variant Fic Recs
I'd describe Pine Bluff Variant as a low key fan favorite, an episode that I even feel like appreciation has grown for over the years. Oh sure, it doesn’t get the fan love that a Memento Mori or Pusher might, but we sure do see those Mulder Scully intense looks gifs popping up pretty often, right? Plus, it has partner trust angst, undercover intrigue, hurt/comfort, genuine thriller-style suspense, and serious MSR overtones.
I like PBV for all of those reasons obviously, but also because it feels like the show going with a slightly different tone. Starting from its action-based, FBI operation cold open, we know this is more conspiracy / bioterrorist thriller than classic X-file. Yes, there’s a sci fi component to the biotoxin--and the scenes that reveal its victims have a horror feel--but this episode just isn’t as much about the supernatural. It also raises the interesting--and nowadays more pointed--question: aren’t anti-government groups operating under their own rules sometimes potentially as dangerous as the government itself?
TXF tried several kinds of experiments in its later seasons, in production and structure of show (Triangle or X-Cops), in exploring all kinds of playful, self-aware and satirical comedy (lots of season 6, Hollywood A.D., etc.), in making drastic moves with its mytharc (One Son, Requiem, etc). Going in the direction of a more purely action-suspense thriller for a MOTW wasn’t something they ever tried again (that I can think of anyway). And I think that's kind of a shame? It feels like a good change up. Different without messing too much with the show’s basic DNA.
Not to mention, y'all, Scully thinks he betrayed her! And there's the scene with the finger! And Mulder thinks he's going to die! There's so much good stuff here!
Here is a list of Pine Bluff Variant fic recs. (As usual, I really think there should be more. This episode has sooooo many openings. You should write some.)
Calling Bluffs - mangokiwitropicalswirl An angsty little post ep that doesn’t flinch from the way coming close to death affects Mulder (or Scully). It also raises the question of how much their bond always puts them at risk. Moving ending.
Stop Me If You’ve Heard This One Before - pinebluffvariant Immediately post ep, Scully protects Mulder. There is some satisfying hurt/comfort. But what really shines in this fic is the ending, which ties a nice bow on season 5 and kicks me in the feels. Stop me if you’ve heard this one before, indeed: sniff.
Passing Solace - DarlaBlack An intensely romantic NC-17 scene set in the middle of the episode, focused on their deep care and need for one another. Beautifully written.
All of This (around) Us - secondsflat In this sweet fic they share whiskey before Scully sets his finger bone, and Scully voices her frustration at not knowing about his undercover work. An intimate, atmospheric little scene.
Snakebitten - onpaperfirst This is a riff on all of season 5 written with great skill and subtlety. So, so good. It’s canon divergent in that it seeds the Pine Bluff Variant / New Spartans storyline back earlier in the season—and it has more RST. Such a treat.
Postcards Slipped Under the Door - skuls Two years after Pine Bluff Variant, some time after the events of En Ami in season 7, Mulder begins receiving ominous postcards from the New Spartans, suggesting they have regrouped. Skinner and Scully think it’s too dangerous for him to get involved in the case again, so Scully goes instead. This is hard on Mulder, as they’re in a recently begun relationship. Angsty, plot-driven, satisfying.
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Caught on Tape
Summary: One late night at the office, Scully finds some strange tapes buried in the bottom of Mulder's desk. What she finds could fundamentally alter the way she views her partner - and their relationship.
Or: Mulder made tapes for Scully while she was abducted. One night she finds them.
Look, I may be in Season 4, but I will always mentally be in Season 2. The abduction arc is so dear to me, and means so much for both characters.
Rating: Teen and Up
Word Count: 4,044
TW/CW: Suicidal ideation, near-suicide attempt, references to abduction.
Read on Ao3
HUGE thanks to @theswisscheeserag for beta-ing this one. This fic was a struggle, and she really saved it from succumbing to all of my bad writing habits, so y’all have her to thank for that.
Tagging @today-in-fic :)
#the x files#txf#x files#x files fanfic#txf fanfic#x files fanfiction#txf fanfiction#dana scully#fox mulder#msr#msr fanfic#introspection#txf s2
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Calling all X Files fanfic writers!
If you have published msr fanfic in the 1990s or 2020s please consider filling out this form for my undergraduate dissertation: https://forms.gle/vdUDPg7yFaAPidgc8
You can send me your filled out version of the consent form via email ([email protected]) or dm me on tumblr. Please include your penname(s) when you do :)
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Shirts
Scully wakes up one morning to realize her usual shirts don't fit anymore.
Read on AO3.
She’s at Mulder’s apartment when she wakes up one morning and realizes that her blouse is way too tight to wear to work. The buttons at her middle are fit to pop and the whole thing is pulling until there are sizeable gaps between the strained buttons that show… well, everything.
With a sigh, she wrestles herself out of the shirt and silently bemoans the hubris that kept her from accepting her mother’s offer to help her shop for maternity clothes last weekend. She thought she had more time.
That’s the crux of it, isn’t it? Always thinking we have more time…
She swallows hard and digs through her side of Mulder’s closet for a different blouse. Everything there is the same size as the one she just tried to put on. She considers, for a moment, just re-wearing her shirt from yesterday – Sunday – but it’s more casual than she would prefer, especially since she feels she has an image of professionalism to maintain in light of her increasingly-evident condition.
She hasn’t heard any of the rumors – she suspects she may have Agent Doggett to thank for that – but she knows they’re circulating. She’s seen the shared looks and not-so-subtle glances when she walks through the upstairs offices. Most of the bureau must know by now that she’s pregnant and have a solid idea of who the father is.
Her skin crawls to think of what people might say, not because she’s ashamed in any way, but because she knows that no one will ever understand the depth of her relationship with Mulder; no one can grasp exactly what he meant to her and what she meant to him. They will think of tawdry nights out on the road or locked doors in their downstairs office, rather than the encompassing love and comfort and friendship that lay between them. The rumors will make their relationship sound cheap and dirty when it was anything but.
And then there are the people who will romanticize it, who will imagine her grief and try to sympathize when they have no real idea of how large the gaping hole in her heart is. They will never fully understand that Mulder had become her whole world, their lives entangled in a beautiful and painful and confusing way that even she isn’t sure how to define. She loved him, and still does, but they were so much more than just love. They were more than any simple word in this language or any other. The hollow sympathies and the cards and the flowers will mean nothing, if they ever come. They can never fully encapsulate who she and Mulder were, together.
And so, she isn’t sure what’s worse – the scorn or the pity. She’s glad she hasn’t heard any of it. She hopes she never does.
Her eyes slide from her own shirts to Mulder’s. There are a few missing; she has been slowly taking them out to sleep with, one by one, as Mulder’s cedar-y scent wears off. She grabs a light blue one and slides it over her arms and shoulders, starting to button it up.
It fits. Not perfectly, but it lays over her stomach and breasts comfortably. The shoulders are a bit large and she will certainly have to roll the sleeves, but the fit reminds her, in a way, of the looser suits and blouses she wore when she was younger, when she first started working in the X-Files.
She stands in the mirror, taking in the shirt and her face and the bump at her waist that is becoming more and more apparent. The shirt might be reminiscent of her younger days, but the rest of her is not; there are dark circles under her eyes and her cheeks look more hollow than they ever have. Her mother would say she looks haggard, if Maggie Scully weren’t too kind to make any comment on her appearance at all, aside from the occasional “you look a bit tired, darling,” or “I think you’re starting to show, dear. I can tell if you turn just the right way.”
Scully sighs and rolls the sleeves, sliding her jacket over it. She turns in the mirror and decides that her appearance is acceptable.
When she arrives at work, she sees Agent Doggett do a subtle double-take at her outfit. He seems to consider it for a moment before turning back to his work without comment.
She lets out a breath as she sits at her desk and opens a file.
—
Despite her mother’s repeated offers to help her shop for maternity wear, Scully continues to wear Mulder’s shirts. She washes them in his washer and dryer, using his brand of detergent and dryer sheets in the hopes of making them smell more like him. It helps, she thinks. Maybe.
A kind coworker from the fingerprinting lab gifts her a couple of maternity shirts that she had purchased but never worn during her own pregnancy. Scully smiles and accepts them, but they never leave her closet.
The material of some of Mulder’s shirts is a bit stiff and scratchy. She wears them anyway, over a tee or a tank on the days when her skin feels too sensitive.
Her stomach itches now from the stretching. At night, she sometimes imagines that it’s Mulder’s warm hands applying lotion to her abdomen instead of her own. She can almost feel his breath brushing her neck and tickling her hair if she closes her eyes.
Though she’s been able to feel the baby kicking on the inside for a bit now, the first time she can feel it from the outside is during one of the times she’s applying lotion. A tiny foot presses against her fingertips and she immediately falls apart, thinking of how excited Mulder would have been to feel that first kick.
She still uses lotion after that, but she refuses to think of Mulder while she applies it. She can’t.
She still wraps herself in his shirts every day.
Her mother stops offering to help her shop. Instead, she brings by a bottle of Mulder’s brand of detergent.
—
Eventually, Mulder’s shirts no longer fit.
She’s almost through her seventh month now, and his shirts fit almost as poorly as her own did the first day she started wearing them.
On the weekends she wears his sweatshirts, which are still mostly loose. During the week days, she wears sweaters.
She calls her mom. They go shopping. It’s a quiet affair, but they come home with a good handful of pants, blouses, and casual shirts for just about any occasion.
She still wears his sweatshirts on the weekends, even as they grow tighter. The material is soft and the fabric still smells faintly of him. Something about it holds the scent longer, she thinks. Or, perhaps, it’s just her imagination –the ghost of a scent lingering around the Oxford lettering.
Who cares? It feels good. It feels better.
She’s never heard the office gossip, not even a whisper. She does hear Doggett snapping at a pair of agents in the 3rd floor breakroom once, not long after she starts wearing sweaters instead of Mulder’s button-ups, but she never finds out what they had said to invoke Doggett’s anger. She doesn’t ask, and he doesn’t say.
He brings her hot chocolate sometimes. And ginger tea for her stomach. She remembers one day, as he hands her a mug of cocoa with extra marshmallows, that John Doggett was a father once. She wonders if her own impending parenthood brings up any painful memories for him. If it does, he never gives even the slightest indication. Instead, he asks her things like how she’s feeling, how her checkup appointments go, and if she’s still craving green olives. (“I picked up a jar last night. In case of emergencies.”)
She takes the olives appreciatively and eats the whole jar in one sitting.
—
When Mulder returns, she gives back his shirts. He gives her a small smile and lets her help him rehang them in the closet next to hers.
Things are a bit tense. He’s still not fully back, still feeling discombobulated from missing almost half a year of his life. Of her life.
She can see the flashbacks in his eyes. He’s remembering things – slowly, painfully – from his abduction. He flinches at the sound of a saw from the construction site across from his apartment complex. He pulls away when a nurse tries to grab his wrist to check his pulse. He won’t lace his boots around his ankles. Unpredictable sensations threaten to overwhelm him and she feels terrible that she can’t even fathom how to protect him from it.
She feels even worse that he seems resistant to letting her try.
They sleep apart for a few days. She cries and doesn’t even try to blame it on the hormones.
He calls her in the evening on his fourth day home from the hospital and asks if she’s seen his favorite Oxford University sweatshirt; “the blue one with the boxy lettering.” She realizes it’s still in her bag of things she had her mother bring her at the hospital, and she offers to return it to him that night.
He invites her into his apartment. She settles on the couch and gives the sweatshirt back, feeling a bit of loss as the treasured, Mulder-scented fabric leaves her fingers. Still, he smiles genuinely and thanks her, and she supposes that’s a sort of recompense.
He puts it on and freezes, looking down at it. The middle is stretched out a bit from Scully wearing it.
“Mulder, I’m so sorry. Maybe with a good wash and dry we could fix-”
Mulder shakes his head and takes it off. “No. No, it’s-” He swallows and Scully tilts her head at him, brows furrowed.
He offers her a hand, helping her to her feet and then, a bit awkwardly, he lifts her arms up and slides the sweatshirt over her head and down her arms until its snugly fitted over her and her belly.
He swallows again and blinks. “Yeah, that’s, um. That’s better.”
In a second, she’s wrapped securely in his arms and wrapping him securely in hers. Between them, she can feel their baby kick. Mulder gives a watery laugh and hugs her more tightly.
And she thinks, for a moment, that he’s more comfortable than any shirt.
#this is set (mostly) in the 3 months Mulder is presumed dead in deadalive#the x files#fanfiction#x files fanfic#msr#dana scully#fox mulder#mulder x scully#scully x mulder#x files#txf#john doggett#maggie scully#grief and healing#pregnancy#love in the face of loss#happy ending#angst first tho lol#todayinfic
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Sense, Chapter 5/5: Sight
Rated X / 737 words / Posted on AO3 / Tagging @today-in-fic
Scully is lying sideways on the mattress, her toes curled over the edge and Mulder perfectly framed between her open legs. He’s just pulled out of her mid-session and is standing beside the bed, stiff cock cooling in the breeze as he digs around in the drawer on her nightstand.
She takes the opportunity to have a good, long look at him, raking her eyes over his sleek runner’s body until she settles on his groin. He’s wrestling a cock ring onto his shaft: tugging it on one side and then the other, stretching his balls down to get the best fit. Scully’s hand wanders between her legs while she watches him, fascinated by how rough he is with himself. He stops to give himself a few short strokes, makes an adjustment, and then strokes himself some more. Watching him touch himself so casually, so expertly, is surprisingly erotic. She swirls her middle finger around her clit, which is already swollen and slippery; they’ve been at it for a while now.
She might have guessed that sex with Mulder would be an event. While most men she’s slept with saw it as a sprint to the finish line, Mulder’s approach is that of a decathlete. He paces himself, conserving his stamina by spending countless minutes with his hands and head between her legs, making her come at least twice before he allows himself any attention. Even then, she will inevitably be the one begging him to finish when she’s too oversensitized and wrung out to continue, requiring a nap before she has the energy to drag herself to the bathroom and get cleaned up.
He’s jerking himself steadily now, one hand cupped under his balls. The head of his cock is shiny and purple, and she can see how hard he is by the way it snaps back to attention when he lets his palm slide off the tip on a downstroke. A quick glance to his face confirms that he’s watching her as well, bottom lip sagging and eyes glazed as he stares between her open legs. This is something he’s asked for, something she’s been too shy to indulge him on, but now that it’s happening she can’t bring herself to feel anything but aroused. She doesn’t need to put on a show for him; it feels good and she’s genuinely into it.
She knows she’s going to come again, and the realization that he’ll get to watch her do it is like some kind of secondhand aphrodisiac. She gets up on one elbow so she can see him better, which also affords a better view of her own knuckles flexing as her middle finger swirls round and round. Mulder is stroking at an absolutely frenzied pitch, his breathing labored as he tries not to finish. She sees his abs tense and he lets out a strangled little whine, like he’s being tortured, and it pushes her over the edge.
“I’m coming,” she announces, her eyes still on his cock though she’s struggling to keep them open.
A hot gush suddenly coats her fingers and Mulder drops to his knees like an obedient parishioner, pressing his mouth against her soaking cunt. She sinks her fingernails into the back of his head and clamps her thighs over his ears, curling around him and coming so hard she can barely breathe. She’s wailing and moaning and probably alerting the neighbors, but she doesn’t possess the capacity to care. He doesn’t relent until she spasms and pushes him away, and he kisses a wet trail along the inside of her quivering thigh.
Scully stares at the ceiling, panting and dazed, until Mulder crawls over her, a lovestruck smile stretched across his shining wet lips. She smiles back at him, just a little bit embarrassed, then glances down between their bodies where his painfully hard cock is bobbing impatiently.
“Did you enjoy that?” she asks coyly, as though she got nothing from it.
He dips his head down and kisses the skin just in front of her ear.
“Almost as much as you did,” he husks, and she feels his erection brush against her belly.
She reaches down and grabs ahold of him, and he exhales a shuddering breath.
“Then why don’t you sit against the headboard so you can watch me ride you?” she whispers.
She’s never seen a naked man move so quickly in all her life.
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I really appreciate how much Scully cries on screen because usually a strong female character like Scully wouldn’t cry on screen at all but Scully does because she’s a real 3 dimensional character who gets to have feelings outside being strong and even though she doesn’t get to have a lot of female friends or she sometimes is forced to be more masculine because of her career but she still gets to be soft or scared sometimes and she gets to feel things
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once in a blue moon Rosenkranz does other things like fanfiction. check this thing out 😌 (or don't. I'm not your dad)
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a mini acute postpartum MSR fic
When Maggie takes up the baby-holding duties, Scully finally crashes. Mulder pulls up a chair and leans over the edge of the bed, mindlessly playing with her hair.
Softly, he asks, “Scully?”
“Hm?” She settles into the hospital bed that he knows from experience is not all that comfortable.
“I know I don’t say this a lot," Mulder says, "but I can’t believe that really happened.”
“Mm. Feels like it happened.” She closes her eyes.
Shit, from the way it looked, he’s sure it does.
“Hey Scully?”
“What?”
“Did you have an out of body experience when they handed him to you? Because I… when I held him, I definitely had some kind of cosmic experience. I wouldn’t say astral projection entirely, but something in that vein.”
“Mulder, please, not right now.”
“No, I’m being serious.”
Eyes still closed, toneless, she says, “I was definitely in my body.”
“Okay.” Mulder tucks a strand of hair behind her ear and rests his head on the crook of one arm, messing with her hair with the other. “I really owe you, Scully. I mean, I probably owed you before but this is…this is pretty crazy. And this might be a weird thing to say but I’m really proud of you and I’m not being flippant.”
No response.
“Scully?”
When he lifts his head, Scully is mouth opened asleep under the florescent overhead lights, her hair scorching the dryer sheet white pillow. She’s got eggplant dark circles under her eyes and she hasn’t put on mascara in over a week, hasn’t worn pants that fasten in much longer. A few hours ago, delirious with pain, she gave him a plump, vernix coated, gurgle screaming, magnificent son.
Mulder lays his head against the edge of her mattress, happy to be anywhere in her peripheral. His spine is going to ache when he wakes and a nurse wheeled a cot into the room earlier, but he kind of just wants to be close to Scully.
The baby is cradled in his grandmother’s long-waiting arms. To Maggie, Mulder murmurs, “Wake me if he wakes up,” knowing she won’t. She swears she will anyways. He closes his eyes.
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afternoon
pairing: fox mulder x fem!reader
word count: 7.8k
warnings: 18+, nsfw, smut, oral (f recieving), fingering
other tags: it’s alluded to that mulder is trans
authors note: i originally posted this on ao3 under the same title and username (afternoon by dollmulder) if you’d rather read it there :) otherwise, enjoy!
p.s, as i stated on ao3 this is the first bit of writing i’ve done in some years now, and it’s also the first ever explicit smut scene ive written, so i apologize if it’s not that great as i really have no idea what im doing here and my skills are rather rusty. but i do hope you enjoy and let me know what you think!
you stood in front of the stove that belonged to the kitchen of your small apartment. before you, a pink kettle was placed on the burner, while you patiently waited for the water inside to boil. it was midday, and for once neither you nor fox had any plans. typically, when one of you wasn’t tied up with work, the other one was. however, today was different, and you intended to take full advantage of it.
you may have wasted part of the day by sleeping in until the afternoon, but you couldn’t help it. fox was asleep in your bedroom still, and he looked so agonizingly beautiful while he slept. not that he didn’t when he was awake, because by god he did, but being able to lie in bed next to him, admiring him and listening to his heartbeat thrum in his chest was an experience like no other. the way his eyelashes rested upon his cheeks, and how he snuggled his face deeper into the pillow now and then.
you enjoyed moments of domesticity like that, even though they were somewhat fleeting. oftentimes the two of spent your time together at his apartment, and when you weren’t doing that, he was either at work or off chasing the paranormal. sometimes he would invite you on these excursions, and generally you would go if you weren’t busy with work yourself, but it seems this weekend he had nothing planned for once. it was as if all the stars were aligned to give you both this perfect day, and you were hoping to keep it that way.
you drummed your fingers against the wooden countertop, impatiently waiting as your thoughts drifted from weekends spent with fox to other mundane things, like going over your to-do list of errands for this weekend, laundry, dishes, shopping, etc. and you wondered how many of those things you were actually going to be able to check off. you decided though that for today, your list could wait. today was going to be a perfect day, you said to yourself, as if manifesting it to be true.
you watched the kettle for a moment longer but a watched pot never boils, and almost as if a meant to be a perfectly planned distraction, you heard your bedroom door creak open, and the soft thuds of fox’s feet making his way down the hall. you smiled to yourself, and turned around just in time to see him leaning in the archway, his hair looking scruffy and his face still wrought by sleep. he was wearing nothing but boxers that clung to him loosely, and you must say, even then in this disheveled state, he looked breathtaking.
“i was wondering where you went,” he yawned, rubbing his eyes and still trying to rid the slumber from his system. you felt your heart flutter at the way his voice was laced with sleepiness, before you sauntered over to him, his large hands immediately finding their way to your hips, like following a well traveled road. it was instinctive for him.
you reached up and placed a chaste kiss to his lips, cupping his face as you did so, your hands moving down so your thumbs could glide over his paltry amount of stubble. “miss me?”
“always.” he smiled at you and you smiled back, before reaching up to give him another quick peck on the cheek.
“well, good morning- er, afternoon i guess.”
fox hummed, and after a beat he asked, “is it really that late?” his eyes roved over your body, eyeing your outfit, and you squirmed under his gaze.
“i see the mystery of my missing t shirt’s been solved,” he remarked before you had a chance to respond to his previous question, not that it mattered. fox had realized his shirt was missing a little while ago and he had figured you’d borrowed it or that he had misplaced it, but now that he knew for sure, this was another mystery he could check off from his ever-growing list. he supposed he could’ve asked you about it before, but it was never a top priority to him compared to other unsolved cases that wracked his brain on the constant.
you pulled out of his grasp, swaying your way back over to the stove, as his hand outreached, wanting to hold you still. “i borrowed it the other day,” you said facing away from him, pretending to be watching the kettle and biting your lip, thinking. “i hope you don’t mind.” you knew that he didn’t. he loved when you wore his clothes, when you gave them back and your scent lingered interwoven in the fabric, as if he needed any more reasons to put off doing his laundry.
“do you want any tea?” you cut through his thoughts, asking over your shoulder while you still faced the stove, and he hummed in approval.
suddenly, a smirk befell your face as you walked over to the cabinets, standing on your tippy toes to reach for two mugs. your- his -shirt rode up slightly, but just enough to expose your light blue underwear and the way it hugged your curves. you stretched a little more than you needed to, making sure he got the vision.
he hummed, too focused on watching your little display, eyes focused on your movements as he spoke, voice still slightly gruff from sleep. “you know that i don’t mind,” he trailed off, returning to your prior conversation. he pulled his plump bottom lip into his mouth, “but i’d like if you at least told me first.”
you grabbed the two mugs, one of which being a dusty blue color, with darker blue dots and little white ghosts swirling all around it, and the other was a translucent pink, with a red and pink strawberry pattern encompassing it. you placed them on the counter and stopped being on your tippy toes, his shirt falling back into place covering you back up for now. it was an old shirt of his, one from his time at oxford, and it hung slack around your smaller frame.
“im telling you now aren’t i?” you turned around and found fox stepping towards you, his arms coming to wrap around your waist. this was another thing the two of you usually did at his apartment, which made sense of course, as you both spent lots of the time you had together there, but last night, after staying particularly late at his office, fox called and decided to crash at your place as it was less of a drive than going back to his own apartment, and of course because he missed being in your presence. you gave him a key a short while ago so he could do just that, and because you loved having him in your space too. you couldn’t quite explain it but it made your apartment feel more like a home whenever he was here. you wondered if he felt the same about you being at his apartment, and decided he probably did, seeing as your presence there did make it more homely. you remembered when you used to continuously pester him about using his bedroom for it’s intended purpose instead of a large cluttered storage space, and he teased you back asking what you meant by “intended purpose”. you told him he’d have to find out, and that he did when the next time you came over his bedroom was decluttered, ready and waiting.
a flush aroused on your cheeks as you continued to think, now about last night, where upon his arrival here, you had ushered him to bed while he sleepily rambled to you about whatever it was he was working on, probably things he wasn’t supposed to tell you. all you could remember was something about government conspiracies and alien abductions, which was the usual topic of his sleepy rambling. that, and talking about you. you loved to listen to his sleepy words and babbling, even if it didn’t always make much sense to you.
then you thought of later that night when you both were in bed, sleepy fingers fumbling, touching, teasing one another in the dark. the way his hands slithered up and around your bare chest as yours did the same, before dipping down below his boxers while your mouth swallowed up the sleepy whines and whimpers that mewled past his lips.
“more like showing me,” fox chuckled, bringing you back to the here and now, and your blush deepened at his remark. he then pressed a kiss to your forehead, and you smiled, holding your left hand out to rest your palm against his chest. his skin was warm, much warmer than your cold fingers. as if to prove your point, he shivered a bit as your fingers delicately traced the two surgical scars across his chest.
“sorry,” you whispered, giggling and pulling your hand back to rest a finger on your bottom lip, doe eyes looking up at him, but just as suddenly as you did that, he grabbed your hand away and brought it to his own lips, kissing each of your dainty fingers. you smiled, going to take a step back but forgetting there was nothing but counter behind you. you were too enraptured by the moment to think about anything else, but just as soon as it happened it was over with.
“pretty,” he muttered to himself, before letting go and walking off towards presumably the bathroom, and you sighed into a smile, body still pressed to the counter behind you. he was such an interesting man, and you meant that in the best way possible. even from the very first moment you had met him, you couldn’t stop thinking about him and all of his intricacies. he had enthralled you from the beginning, and you couldn’t help but to question what he saw in you, not in a strongly self deprecating sense, but in the way that you questioned how you could compare to someone like him.
you knew if you told him these thoughts he would simultaneously shut them down and reflect them back at you, wondering what he did to deserve you .
you then turned and reached up again, this time towards a different cabinet, your fingers sliding under the lip of the wooden door, pulling it open with a low creak. you were looking for your tea bags, and after a moment of shuffling between boxes you finally found the one you were searching for. grabbing the box of just plain black tea, you opened it carefully and plopped a teabag into each mug, before closing the box back up and stretching once more to put it back into the cupboard where it belonged, in perfect timing as the kettle began whistling.
finding your way over to the stove, you grabbed the kettle and turned off the burner, then stepping back over to the counter and pouring some water into each mug. you heard fox shuffling his way back into the kitchen and shortly after felt one of his hands grab your hips, the other brushing your hair to the side so he could kiss at your neck.
“grab the honey for me?” you asked him, leaning over and placing the kettle back onto the stove, and he groaned, not wanting to let you go, but nevertheless he did, returning a moment later, honey in hand, which he had retrieved from the nearby cupboard behind you both. you turned around and outstretched the ghost mug towards him. “i’ll trade you,” you said, doing just that, knowing he preferred his tea without any honey in it.
he smiled, taking the mug and blowing some of the steam away from it. “you gave me this mug on purpose didn’t you?” he questioned, already knowing the answer, he just wanted an excuse to hear your angelic voice once more.
“of course, spooky.”
normally, he didn’t care for when people called him that name, not that it necessarily angered him, it was more annoyance at best, but with you it was different. you used it as a term of endearment, and he loved it, along with every other pet name you would call him. you had a way of spinning things into a positive light, one of the many, many, things he adored about you.
you turned back around to face the counter, grabbing a nearby spoon and stirring the honey into your tea, while he sat his mug down and put the bear-shaped honey bottle back into its home where it belonged. he came back behind you again, wrapping his arms around you and resting his head on your shoulder.
“what’s the plan for the rest of today?” he asked, snaking his large hands under his oxford shirt so that they could rest upon the bare skin of your hips. he hooked his thumbs under the band of your underwear, just wanting to be able to feel the coolness of your skin beneath his fingertips and the way it’s softness complemented the somewhat calloused nature of his hands.
“whatever you want to do, monster boy,” another pet name. “it’s your day off after all.”
he hummed. “it’s yours too.”
you sat your mug down in front of you waiting for it to cool off some more as it wasn’t ready for you to take your first sip, and then you turned to face him. “we both know you’re busy with work much more often than i am. even when you’re not working, you’re working . so you choose. i’m just happy to spend time with you,” you stretched up to press a lingering kiss to his lips, “but if i do get a say, brush your teeth, you have morning breath.” you paused… “er, afternoon breath.” and he smiled at you before groaning in mock annoyance.
in return, you batted and fluttered your eyelashes at him. “please?” and he smiled once more. how could he not give in to what an angel asked of him?
“oh i suppose, anything for you, my dearest.” and then off he went again, back towards the bathroom. you always kept a spare toothbrush for him in a cup at the sink. it made you smile in the mornings to see it there, just a little hint of his existence in your life, along with all the other little things around your apartment. you’ve left your fair share of belongings at his apartment, probably more than he has here, and with that thought, you made a mental note to yourself to steal more of his clothes and other belongings to have around.
sliding the mugs to the side, you hopped up on the countertop, grabbing your own mug and blowing the steam away as you waited for him to come back. you gently took a first sip of your tea, cursing at yourself as it was still too hot for you, so you resumed blowing on it, and as you did, your mind drifted, thinking about what kind of adventures the day ahead of you might hold. who knows with what fox might have in mind, always conjuring up some new adventure to fill the boredom of the rest of the day with. you were perfectly content with just lounging around your apartment in your underwear all day, not particularly wanting to go out and about and do anything, so you hoped he wouldn’t suggest anything of that nature. you didn’t want to have to take his shirt off in order to change into something more appropriate for outside wear, as you enjoyed the way his scent lingered around you. although, you decided, while you don’t necessarily want to take his shirt off to change out of it, you wouldn’t oppose to taking it off for other reasons.
your mind drifted, envisioning your previous escapades, your mind conjuring up pictures of his hands roaming your body, your hands slipping underneath his boxers, feeling him, teasing him, palming him in a way he had rarely let others do. the way his mouth hung open, his hands clutching your shirt, the bedsheets, whatever they could grab ahold of. excitement stirred in your abdomen and you shifted your hips, squeezing your thighs together. your hands became his in your mind, as the vision shifted to how he teased you, holding you, kissing you, fingers dipping beneath your lace trim to slip inside of you, and you bit your lip feeling a familiar hunger starting to growl within you.
last night the two of you had fooled around a bit before he dozed off, but it was barely anything more than soft touches and sleepy kisses, hushed i missed you ’s and whispered i love you ’s. even if your fingers had curled underneath his boxers, it was mere teasing, and it left your body (and his) wanting more, but you were sleepy and you knew he was too. however, now that your body and mind were awake, your desire was too.
after a moment fox returned and found his way over to you once more, moving to stand between your legs, and even with you sitting on the countertop he was still a bit taller than you. his hands rested on your thighs as he leaned down to kiss you slowly. it was a passionate kiss, and even though your bottom lip still tingled a bit from burning it with the hot tea, you ignored it and focused on the new tingling sensation. there was nothing better than a gentle kiss from fox mulder himself, and you’d never trade up this opportunity for anything.
“what’s gotten you so bothered?” he asked with a smirk, pulling his lips away from yours and picking up on your flushed face and warm skin, and the neediness you kissed him back with. in response, you wrapped your legs around his torso to keep him there before saying anything. this moment now felt like home. having the man of your dreams, the man of your reality , standing before you, between your legs, looking at you with such adoration you’d think it was like you had gifted him the whole world. but you did, because to him, you were his whole world.
“just thinking about you,” you hummed, your mug off to the side, forgotten about for now as you reached your hands around so your fingers could twirl themselves in the bit of hair at the nape of his neck, and then you smiled as you pondered for only a second.
“of me?” he asked, smirking as you looked at him with such innocence, but a gleam of something else in your eyes. a look he knew all too well. “me how?”
“oh, you know.” you shrugged, playing coy.
“enlighten me.”
“well, i do have an idea for something we could do today.”
he leaned down, kissing the corner of your mouth, speaking lowly, as his lips moved their way around to your neck. you tilted your head to give him more access, and his breath tickled your skin as he spoke. “i thought you said i got to choose today's events?”
“would you rather do something else then?”
“you haven’t told me your idea yet.”
“i thought you liked solving mysteries.”
the way his mouth moved against your neck, you began to feel butterflies invading your stomach, sinking further down below, and you felt one of his hands slide from your hips to the expanse of your thighs, to the space in between, and you gasped at the sensation. his fingerstips delicately traced over you, nothing separating the two of you except for the thin cotton layer of your underwear, which had procured a small wet patch in the time being.
“something like this?”
you gasped, feeling his teeth scrape gently at your skin, followed by another pink flush rushing to your cheeks, and you felt him smile and chuckle against you, to which you smiled back.
“don’t laugh at me,” you breathed out as his fingers pulled away from you, sliding back up to hold your waist beneath his shirt, and the butterflies in your stomach began to flap their wings more vigorously. your mouth hung open, as his worked magically against your neck, and you couldn’t help but whine slightly as he pulled away, the only contact now being his hands holding you still, which on a regular day, you would never complain about, but you did desperately wish for his fingers back where they were moments ago, deeper, inside you . you shuffled your hips at the idea and a devious smirk swept across his face. “but uh, yeah i think you’ve got the idea now.”
he looked you over for a moment, his eyes holding sweetness like that of the honey in your now forgotten tea, and the softness of a prairie after a long night of rainfall. but there was something else lingering there too.
your hands, which had been holding onto the countertops edge for the time being, traveled their way back up to cupping his face once more, your thumb gently caressing over his bottom lip, plump and sheening with saliva. his breath was hot as he panted between parted lips.
“i love you,” you said before you could even register the words coming out of your mouth, and your face flushed again with subtle embarrassment. it was true of course, you did love him, you loved him like you needed air to breathe. your hand dropped from his face, down his neck, and rested languidly against his chest.
“what was that?” he asked, leaning down again to press sloppy kisses to your face, your neck and around your ear. his voice was low, and you sucked your bottom lip in between your teeth in anticipation. your fingers curled, scratching gently at his chest. “i couldn’t quite hear you from way up there.” and of course there it was, you were giving yourself to fox mulder, allowing yourself to be loved and touched and cherished by him, and he couldn’t help himself from making a joke at the expense of your height. you smiled and you couldn’t stop the laugh that he loved so dearly from tumbling from your lips.
“i said,” you spoke in mock annoyance, shoving him away playfully as his hands roamed up your stomach to gently cup your breasts, and you gasped at the touch, thoughts becoming more jumbled in your brain by the second. you scrunched your face trying to keep the facade of annoyance up, but you were unable to keep the smile from breaking through, and you swallowed thickly as his thumbs massaged in circles. “i said, i love you, you giant idiot.” and he smiled a toothy grin at you.
“i love you more.”
you couldn’t quite describe the emotions you were feeling, there was a culmination of so many at once. happiness, love, lust, contentment, desire, the whole lot. it amazed you how one person could conjure up such sentiments within you, and you could only hope you did the same for him.
he pulled his hands down to hold your waist again as he leaned down to capture your lips with his own, a kiss of fervor. you tasted the lingering effects of your toothpaste mixed with the earthy flavors of the tea you had made earlier still somehow soaked into the cracks of your lips. he pulled your bottom lip with his teeth softly, and you moaned into the kiss with surprise, a sound he swallowed up with nary a complaint. but then he pulled away, and you leaned forward, body and mind still begging for more, and he chuckled breathily.
“quite needy, huh?” he spoke softly, and your eyes fluttered open at the sound. you watched the way he looked at you, and it only fueled the flames of desire within you more.
“quite a tease, huh? ” you mocked, leaning forward to capture his lips once more, whatever passion that the last kiss held, this one was tenfold. it was sloppy, wet, incited by the intensity of your coupled desire. your lips parted and he took the chance for his tongue to slip inside, and your fingers grasped and tugged at his hair, earning a groan from him, and you melted into the sound and sensation.
you arched your back, head thrown back as his hands roamed under your shirt and gently traced up your spine, leaving goosebumps in their wake, and with this new angle his mouth kissed, licked, and nipped at your throat and your hold on his hair got impossibly tighter, and he groaned once more, feeling the vibrations rattle against your throat. you loosened your grasp suddenly and clumsily, uttering hushed apologies as you did so, fearing you might’ve hurt him by pulling too hard. you felt fox smile against your neck, and he pulled away, lips parted as he looked at you. your breathing was fast and your cheeks burned. your neck was red and glistening from his lips, teeth, and tongue, and you looked absolutely stunning in his eyes.
you sat there, deep breaths and adrenaline coursing through your body, and arousal pulsing at your core, as you waited for him to say something, anything. his tongue slid across his teeth into a smile.
“don’t be sorry,” his hands, which had found their way back to your waist, gave a gentle reassuring squeeze, and he leaned in close to your ear again. “i like it.” and you felt your heart flutter.
“i don’t want to hurt you,” you crooned, and his smile remained. he kissed you gently and you fought your bodies urge to lurch forward and devour him whole. your insides fluttered with lust and your core dripped with desire. there was an empty ache within you and while yes, you enjoyed this moment of intimacy, your arousal was like waves, pushing at the floodgates within your brain, and you were willing to let it take control.
“you weren’t.” fox said, pulling his lips away from you slowly, eyes watching you almost as if he could sense your internal struggle, and you simply tried to catch your breath in return.
his hands slithered down away from you, pushing your legs apart wider as he began to kneel before you, eyes watching your reactions the entire time as he cupped his hands and arms around you, pulling you towards the edge of the counter, ever closer to him, and during this process your heels naturally found a resting spot against his back. your skin burned where his hands held you, and all your brain could think about was how his long slender fingers would feel curling inside of you, and his plump lips and tongue tasting you. it was intoxicating.
“we’re doing this here?” you asked, and still he looked up at you, an eyebrow quirked. you felt like a divine being sitting here before him like this, even though he was not on his knees for prayer. fox mulder was not a religious man, but you held the power to make him one, for you were like a goddess to him, and he was going to treat you as such, even if it meant he would have to use his mouth for something so sinful, but for you, he would do anything. his eyes, a deep, dilated color like the moss covered forest floor stared up at you and you felt sacred, even with his gaze mirroring that of the hungry fox lurking within, but you, you were the forbidden fruit, and he was dying to have a taste.
“here.” you decided firmly before he could answer. it was your world, and nothing else mattered. you created the space before you now, and fox was nothing if not your devout follower.
your hands gripped the countertop tightly, knuckles turning white in anticipation, desire tingling in your abdomen and pooling in your underwear. his eyes looked up at you, hands going to push his shirt up your stomach so he could get a better view, and you shivered as the movement tickled your belly. a small tuft of pubic hair peeked out of the top of the lace trim of your undergarments, and your face grew hot as your eyes watched his every move.
fox shot you a quick look, a soft “can i?” surpassing his lips, hanging in the air as you nodded in approval, too busy staring at his face and analyzing his long eyelashes. your eyes traveled down his large nose, sweeping over his pores, and finally resting upon his parted lips, watching as they moved and his voice pulled you from your thoughts and brought you back to the moment.
“use your words,” was what he said, still holding you, but not moving an inch closer until you permit him to. you had control over the situation and your body trembled before him, your tongue darting out to lick your lips before you spoke.
“please.”
and that was all he needed as he leaned forward, pressing gentle kisses to you through your underwear. you gasped at the contact, hips shifting, pelvis tilting, but he held you in place, eyes closed as his mouth pressed more fervent kisses to you, and god, you never wanted to remove an article of clothing more in your life. as if he could read your thoughts, a sudden sound between a gasp and a cry escaped your lips as he pulled the wet fabric to the side, and his mouth pressed directly against you in a gentle teasing kiss. you throbbed before him, and it was almost torturous when you felt the slick cotton fabric covering you back up again, his fingers tracing over you through the fabric once more, oddly reassuring you that he was going to take care of you.
you groaned out of frustration, now exceedingly desperate for his touch, and he cocked his head at you, a faux innocent smile plastered on his face, looking like a dog sitting on the floor in front of you, paws on your thighs, tail wagging excitedly as he begged for scraps. you wouldn’t have been surprised if you’d seen him drooling before you.
“what?” he asked, unable to hide the teasing glint in his eyes as he stared up at you and you quivered before him.
“are you trying to get me to beg?” you asked, chest rising and falling with your heavy breaths.
“well… you know i wouldn’t be opposed to that.”
“i already said please.”
“so say it again then.”
his hands gave you a gentle squeeze causing you to squirm before him, your cheeks getting hotter and the ache within you deepening.
“christ,” you whined, rolling your eyes back in frustration. you knew what you wanted, he knew what you wanted. all you had to do was ask for it.
he loved it when you begged, and while yes, it might inflate his ego a bit, that’s not the reason why he loved it so. it’s because it was nice to have vocal confirmation that you wanted him so desperately as he did you. deep down he was a bit insecure that you didn’t love or desire him nearly as much as he loved and desired you, and while he knew this wasn’t true, there was always this little voice in the back of his head saying “what if?” and hearing your voice pleading for his touch drowned it out and shoved it away.
fox peppered kisses up your thighs, getting close but staying ever far away from where you desired him most. your hands found his hair yet again, intertwining in the soft brunet locks atop his head, and you sucked in a breath as he licked a stripe at the crevice where your leg and hip joined, breaths tickling your skin as the sweet scent of your arousal filled his nose.
“fox, please , if you don’t hurry up i’m going to-“
“what?” he asked, cutting you off while his eyes looked up at you and the cunning smile of a fox etched itself onto his face. you couldn’t quite help but think he had chosen his name appropriately. fox, fox, fox, the word played in your head like a melody, darting around your thoughts like an animal chasing its prey. “you’ll do what exactly?” his words sliced through you while you sat atop the counter like a divine meal, waiting to be ripped and torn to shreds by gnashing teeth, juice dripping and soaking into the earth beneath.
“christ, i don’t- i don’t know, okay? just-“ your words fumbled out of your mouth faster than you could think, frustration and arousal bubbling fast within your body like a pot boiling over on the stove.
“please, please , just touch me already. pretty please?”
“pretty please, huh?” he chuckled to himself as his hands slid to your lower back and over the curvature of your ass, thumbs hooking themselves in the waistband of your underwear. he looked up at you, eyes silently asking for your assistance and you obliged, lifting your hips, allowing him to pull the sodden underwear down off from you, and you kicked them off to the side, legs resting over his shoulders once more. your eyes locked with his as you stared each other down, wondering who would break first. your hand outreached coming up to cup his cheek and jaw again, your thumb tracing over his bottom lip out of habit, and your breath hitched as he pulled it into his mouth, tongue darting over your fingertip devilishly.
he was the first to break eye contact, eyes lurking down your body, finding their way to your dripping core, glistening in the dim lighting, and you were brought back to reality a little bit, realizing that here, now, fox mulder was about to go down on you, in your kitchen. thank god.
you squirmed under his gaze, both out of desire and longing to be touched, tasted, devoured, and picking up on this, he shot a glance up towards you once more, before leaning down and kissing your inner thighs, lips leaving ghostly kiss marks everywhere they touched, and your skin burned with want as his mouth got closer and closer.
fox decided that he had teased you sufficiently. you were a whining princess sat atop a tower, waiting to be rescued, satiated, and he was your knight in shining armor. that and of course, you had asked so nicely. pretty please. how cute and desperate you were, you really were like a princess, his princess, and while fox was never one to be controlling over you, he loved and relished in this possessiveness he was feeling. no one else got to see you like this, but him. no one else made you feel like this but him.
with that thought, he pressed a warm kiss to your wetness, and your body jolted at this, feeling electricity course through you as his tongue licked a tantalizing stripe up your center. one of your hands clenched at his hair, fearing your grasp was the only thing holding you down on earth, the other pushed against the countertop, holding you up as your fingers writhed.
your heart beat for him, quite literally as he felt it pulsing within you. his tongue was soft and his jaw relaxed as he tantalizingly licked from your entrance up to your clit, and a moan escaped from your throat and past your lips, sounding like an angel. your eyes squeezed shut and your head threw back again as his fingers dug into the flesh of your thighs like a soft ripened peach, and his tongue swirled around you.
“jesus, thank you,” thank you, thank you, thank you, you moaned out, not caring if you were being too loud for your thin apartment walls. that wasn’t an issue for now, you would deal with it later. all that existed to you was this moment and the man before you, as he clouded your mind and drank you up, your soul pouring right through you and into him, for him to hold, to love, to cherish. and cherish you he did.
it was like a stage, dark and empty minus the large spotlight shining on you, and only you. the audience was empty, spare for fox, watching you and encouraging your performance as a heavenly choir of moans tumbled from within you, to which his tongue danced in time to.
his mouth worked expertly against you, and your hand tugged at his hair, mewling and moaning, all this behavior just egging him on more.
and then he pulled away, chin slick with a mixture of his saliva and your arousal, and you whined at the loss of contact, eyes flashing open and looking downwards at him, confusion scribbled all over your face. you had thought the teasing was over.
“christ,” he chuckled at your expression, licking the taste of you off from his lips. “are you that desperate or am i just that good?”
“why’d you stop?” you whined, ignoring his gloating and teasing. usually you might feel embarrassed, but right now all you could focus on was the missing sensation of his mouth, and the panging emptiness within you, and his expression softened at seeing your pained one.
“relax princess,” he pressed a kiss to your inner thigh and you whimpered. “i wanted to know if you could hold yourself up okay? i want to use my fingers.” your insides pulsed and your gut clenched at the mention, and how he said it so casually. wordlessly, and quickly, you rearranged yourself into a better position to hold yourself up, his hands slithering down around you, and up your inner thighs.
“good girl,” he praised succinctly, patting your inner thigh gently as he did, the heat on your cheeks burning deeper at his words. his long slender fingers then traveled up towards you and his when they reached their destination, he began moving them in circular motions over and near your clit as you sucked a breath in between your teeth. they moved slow at first, and then gradually began to pick up some speed, stroking up and down, before his fingers fully moved down, parting your folds before slipping inside, slowly starting with just one, pushing inside and then pulling it out, repeating this process teasingly, knowing just how to get you going.
“you’re so beautiful, so needy for me, huh?” he teased, and you wriggled in response, unable to create a coherent sentence, so you opted to let a singular word flow from your lips.
“more.”
he hummed, and then suddenly it was two fingers, and a string of lewd noises and blasphemous curses came from you in response. you were drunk on him, on everything about him, his words, his actions, his smell, his taste, and oh how that thought made you desperately want his mouth and his tongue back on you, tasting you.
his fingers slipped out of you again, slick and shiny, and you looked at him with your mouth dropped open from pleasure, and a protest almost escaped from you before you witnessed him licking his fingers, like he could read your mind, and for a second you wondered if he actually could. your arousal coated his tongue, before he slipped both his fingers slowly back inside, gingerly picking up speed. your eyes closed, relishing in the sensations he was providing you and you were unable to control the soft moans that vibrated from the back of your throat.
“you sound so pretty,” his voice was soft as he spoke. “so pretty just for me, hmm?” he was taking expert care of you, as if that was his divine purpose. he felt that it was, for you were kind enough to let him see you like this, and it was so so much better than anything his mind had ever fantasized about.
he pressed a few more wet kisses to your thighs, and then just as suddenly his mouth wanted to resume it’s place, and so a bit of spit dribbled from his lips down onto you, adding a bit more wetness to the situation, before his tongue resumed its place, supping at you with unequivocal thirst. his fingers were coated in your wetness and he began curling them up and attacking one spot in particular, earning a whine and a sharp intake of breath from you.
his mouth and lips found their way back up towards your clit, pulling it into his mouth and then letting it go just as suddenly. but then it was back again, and he gently sucked on it, lips soft and warm as he darted his tongue over and around you, and you couldn’t help the surprised and wanton noises you created in return.
your eyes fluttered open to see that his were closed, and you looked down at him, watching his every move, pulsing as you sucked in a breath. the roles were now a bit reversed, you were still the receiver, but he was now the performer, dazzling you with his magical talents. his fingers moved miraculously inside of you causing your thoughts to fade away, like some silly card trick. his sleight of hand was wonderful, his fingers and his mouth knowing exactly how to please you.
“sh-, i’m-,” you panted out, hips grinding against him. his other hand slid back up to hold you and offer more stability, and your walls clenched around his fingers in a way that made him hum against you, sending vibrations throughout.
his mouth pulled away again, jaw beginning to ache from the way he was hungrily feasting upon you, but his fingers remained and he watched you pant and shudder before him, your eyes now closed once more, too focused on the sensations he was providing you.
“yeah?” he asked, encouraging you to use your words. he loved when you were vocal about what he was doing to you, telling him how good you felt or even when all your brain could do was conjure up unintelligible noises. and he loved watching you like this. your parted lips, heavy breaths, eyes scrunched close as you bathed in the way he was making you feel.
“fuck, keep going,” you whined, pleading almost, as your arms and muscles strained, holding up your weight as your hips undulated against his hand. you would be afraid of toppling from your position on the counter, if the only thought you were able to think about wasn’t fox and his hands and his mouth and the sensations he was providing you. just him, him, him, nothing else mattered at the moment, your brain too clouded by pleasure and your impending orgasm that was bubbling beneath the surface. all because of him.
“oh i wouldn’t dream of stopping…. again,” he smirked, able to tell you were close. if you weren’t so enraptured by the moment, you would’ve laughed at him, but you were hyper focused on how good you felt. how good he was making you feel. he swapped his fingers for his mouth, but not before telling you to watch. he wanted to drink you up as you came on his tongue, which he was now fucking you with, and he wanted you to watch him do it. you moaned loudly, sweat pouring from your brow, eyes fluttering open as you watched him between bated breaths.
he hummed against you, and you fought the urge to throw your head back, pleasure washing over you, vibrations coursing through your body as you were ready to come undone.
and that you did, your body tensing and your grip becoming more harsh, grabbing at his hair and holding him in place as you rode out your high. your head threw back, mouth agape, thighs squeezing together around him tightly like a vicd, and a rush shot through your body like a bolt of lightning and you pulsed, walls contracting. his mouth kept working against you, coaxing and guiding you through your orgasm until your body and muscles began to relax and you released a breath you didn’t know you were holding, along with releasing him from both your hands and thighs grip, cheeks reddening in embarrassment as your brain began to slowly process everything.
you used your hand that was holding him in place to now gently push him away from you, feeling overly sensitive, and as he pulled away, his chin was still slick and jaw still aching as he regained his own breath, breaths that slipped past his pink and puffy lips. he stood, leaning forward to enrapture your lips in a kiss, the taste of you still lingering all over him.
“sorry.” you squeaked out, after breaking away from the kiss, still reeling from the effects of your orgasm.
he hummed, “for what?” he really didn’t know what you had to be sorry for, for feeling good? he’d wanted you to, he wanted to take care of you and wanted to make you cum. and he had many times in the past, so what was there to be apologetic for now? he figured it was your nerves, or your own embarrassment rushing to the surface, so he rubbed your side reassuringly. there was absolutely nothing you needed to apologize for, and he really couldn’t think of what it would be.
“suffocating you?” you questioned, as if it was supposed to be something so obvious. and he laughed, a big laugh, like really? that was it? he wasn’t laughing at you, so much so as the apparent absurdity of your statement. as if being suffocated between your thighs wasn’t something he’d enjoy.
after recovering from his laughing fit, he cupped your cheek, smiling softly when he saw your confused expression and the way you couldn’t help yourself from leaning into his touch.
“baby,” he kissed you once more, lips lingering against yours for a second before pulling away to look into your eyes. he opened his mouth to say something else, more reassurances, but you cut him off with another kiss.
“‘s my turn to make you feel good now?” you questioned, drunkenly in love with the man before you. your hand traced down his chest, past his belly button and down his happy trail, fingertips dipping below his waistband, but he grabbed your wrist stopping you from going any further.
you looked up at him, once again confused. did he not want you to touch him?
“not here love,” and then you smiled as he helped you down from the counter top, rescuing the princess from her tower and holding your wrist again to lead you towards the bedroom, leaving your underwear behind, forgotten about for now, along with the two cups of tea you had prepared earlier that had now gone cold.
#fox mulder x reader#fox mulder#fox mulder fanfic#x files fanfic#the x files fanfic#fox mulder smut#fox mulder x reader smut#fanfic#fanfiction#x reader#x reader smut#female reader#reader insert#fem reader
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fin - AO3
The end is anticlimactic. As soon as the clock strikes 4:50pm, Doggett leaves politely with a one-armed hug and well wishes for the little one.
And then it’s just them. Scully and Mulder in their secretive underground den.
Scully sits at his desk and he perches in front of her.
Of all things, Mulder says: “You remember that time we got food poisoning from Wendy’s?”
God, does she ever. She complains, “Mulder, do we have to go there?”
They were barely two years in, somewhere in rural Missouri. It might have been the only time Mulder stopped driving before 7PM and to her absolute horror, the first motel he found to pull into was fumigating or doing construction or something. Whatever. They shared a bathroom for 24 hours and mutually concluded that they would never discuss it again.
“Not if I have any say in it,” Mulder says, “I haven’t been there since.”
“Seriously, Mulder," she warns with a good glare. "I'd rather hear about the praying mantis man. My gag reflex isn't what it used to be.”
“Doesn’t seem any different to me.”
“Mulder,” she scolds him around a barely contained laugh, as if the walls have ears.
Mulder dodges and shifts topics expertly. “I got you something,” he says, free hand scouring around in his pocket.
He produces a stress ball painted to look like a little baseball. “Happy anniversary, Scully.”
They have never celebrated an anniversary and even if they were to take up the practice, it would be somewhere in the crisp dew days of spring, not today.
“Our other anniversary,” Mulder explains, “I’m a little late.”
“Ah,” Scully says, taking the gift and turning it in her hand. He is several months late, actually.
Their first time was not what she expected but it was what she needed. In her more creative moments, she’d imagined that when the dam broke, he would tear buttons from her blouse and pull her panties aside, no frills maneuvering her into position. And that is Mulder, but it is not first time Mulder. First time Mulder wanted to kiss her forehead and take her in. Before, he asked, can I and after, he fell asleep grasping her thumb like a newborn.
It seems like you two have an intense relationship, Scully's therapist once told her, accurately. Leg shaking, concussed sprinting after them intense; pre-sunrise giggling on his couch intense.
“Thank you,” she tells him, slipping it into her bag on the floor.
“It’s my contribution to your labor pain management plan.”
“Yeah. Thanks for that.”
“We can add it the hospital bag checklist.”
“Sure, Mulder.”
Mulder waits under the hum of the AC. “You’re welcome.”
A smoke detector is still hanging by a wire from when she took it apart to discover a bug. Sharpened yellow pencils that appeared in the ceiling – again – without explanation. The chunky patterned blanket from his couch, slouched over the back of the computer chair, brought in when she was sick and cold.
Nobody down here but the FBI’s most unwanted.
“Mulder, there have been periods where I spent more time here than at home,” she confesses.
“Me too. Probably too many times, actually.”
“I met you down here.”
“Yeah. You did.”
“And I– …we –” Her voice cracks, an all too common occurrence recently. We fell in love down here.
Or maybe not – maybe it was the rental cars or the autopsy bays – but she can’t quite remember because the where and when was never all that important. Now that she’s leaving this place behind, it feels like it happened here.
“I know.”
Mulder could say: This place isn’t going anywhere, Scully or you can always come back to visit, but it would be a sore consolation and they both know it. This is the wheezing death rattle of Special Agents Mulder And Scully. It’s such a Mulder thought, she would never dare voice it. It wriggles into her temporal lobe anyways.
She is leaving behind the birthplace of them, the first space they ever shared. Early Them live down here, with their shoulder pads and patterns and loose-fitting suits, stealing shy glances at each other over his whirring slideshows. And Middle Them survived the fire, too; floppy haired and caught in crackling tension and sopping with grief and fear and love that they don’t yet know what to do about. Even flirty, curious Right Before them are down here, testing out new boundaries; lighter, dreamier, sweet and sticky them.
Fudge the dates a little and their baby could have been conceived down here, and in the moment, that's the story she tells herself. It's a nice one. Maybe the fetus is a little bigger than typical, or maybe she misremembered the dates of her last menstrual cycle. Maybe she’s carrying a child made from dusty file cabinets, tacked up printouts, scrawled handwriting, crumpled up sticky notes left beside the trash can filled with takeout containers, and them; all the Thems.
Scully amends her last comment. “Well, I’m not sure that it happened down here. But I realized it down here.”
Mulder takes her hand. “Tell me?”
“It’s nothing crazy.”
“Haven’t you heard? I’m good with nothing crazy these days.”
She smiles; damn, he’s got her. “Okay, well…it was a weekend. You had this dark blue jacket on. It was more casual than you’d typically wear.”
“I think I know the one. I can find it, if you ever need a reminder.”
She gives him a look and continues, unperturbed. “You were sitting here at your desk and I was over there working at the computer. You were eating Reese’s Pieces. Very loudly, I might add.”
“When are we gonna get to the flattering part?”
“Never, if you’re going to interrupt.” Scully gets her bearings again. “You were humming something, I’m not sure what but it was a short tune, over and over. And I looked over to tell you to quiet down so I could focus. You were leaning over your report – or whatever it was you were writing. You had a little cut here above your eyebrow. And I just…I just knew.”
He stares, disbelieving but still holding her hand. “That was it, Scully?” He asks. “I was being annoying and you looked over to tell me to knock it off, and that’s how you had this grand realization?”
She shrugs. “I think maybe it was the mundaneness of it.”
“You’re gonna have to elaborate on that one, Scully.”
“Well,” she tries, “how many times have we had very similar conversations? How many times have I probably been working at the computer and looked over to tell you something? Hundreds, maybe.”
“Maybe more.”
“Right. So, it was all of those…everyday things that made up our relationship, our partnership in the first place. It only makes sense that it would be one of those everyday things that...triggered something.”
Mulder takes that in.
“Huh,” he says, gently splaying out her fingers as he processes. “Did you ever tell me to knock off the noise?”
When she puts herself back in the moment, nothing breaches her memory but the all-consuming red sun dawn of the revelation that she knew she was not going to be able to ignore like she had with all the prior little stair step realizations.
“I don’t think so. I don’t think I said anything to you.”
“You might have saved us a lot of time if you had.”
“No, I don’t think so, Mulder. I don’t– maybe it’s all the hormones, but I don’t think we were ready then.”
Mulder takes a moment to digest that idea. He doesn’t necessarily agree, she can tell and it occurs to her to push it. But when he lapses into quietly dragging a fingertip across the lines in her palm, she decides against it.
A gush of self-consciousness rolls over her and she see it hit him like an aftershock. “Well,” she covers, “what about you?”
He presses his thumb against one of her nails, scanning his print into the keratin of her nailbed.
“When you came to my room in Bellefleur,” he says.
“You– …the first time?”
He smiles, covering. “Yeah.”
“No,” she insists, “Mulder.”
“Yes, Scully.”
In the moment of silence, Mulder fiddles with her fingers, their heads bowed over their joined hands. Then he kisses the middle of her palm like a stigmata and releases her, gauging her mood.
When he gets a reading, he stands and offers her a hand up. “You ready to go, Agent Scully?”
She takes it, shaking hands with this little death.
“I think I am, Agent Mulder.”
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