#they were like we would just send beyonce

[norsesuggestions]

That is not how eurovision popularity works....

Listening to a usa based podcast talking about eurovision and the host was like:

"It is lucky usa do not compete in eurovision because with our pop - culture dominance we would win everytime"

Oh honey..... that is NOT how getting high scores in eurovision works. You would share last place with UK, every single time. LITERALLY

[justagalwhowrites]

Stranger in a Bar - Part One

A DBF!Joel Fic

You meet a stranger in a bar, one who is fun and sexy and makes you wonder if the single life is all it's cracked up to be. But there's one big problem: you probably shouldn't be fucking your dad's best friend.

Pairing: DBF!Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: This is smut, OK? Just a lot of smut. Protected P in V sex. Oral sex (m and f receiving). Age gap of 20 years. No use of Y/N. Minors DNI, 18+ only.

Length: 6.8k

AO3 | Fic Masterlist | Masterlist

A/N: So this was supposed to be a one shot and then it started getting out of hand. It's going to just be two parts for the moment, this is going to be a very little baby fic, OK? Small. Lil baby story. Also. there's a hefty age gap and it comes up because logistics but no power imbalance. Thanks for always putting up with my shit, y'all are the best ❤️

Bar None, Present day

One of your friends had just put Single Ladies on the jukebox when you saw him across the bar. Bar None, the place you’d picked for the night, had one of those stupid app-powered ones and the three girls you had kept in touch with from high school had been abusing it all night long. But the man across the bar was so distracting that you hardly noticed. His eyes were locked on you, so tight and hot that it would send a chill up your spine if it was from the wrong set of eyes. But they were his eyes. Dark and molten and set into a sculpted face with patchy scruff and shaggy curl streaked with gray. 

No, you thought, he couldn’t spark anything but desire. 

“We should do the dance!” Your friend Emily slurred, tugging your arm. “C’mon! Now that you’re a single lady again, you have to own it.” 

She flashed her empty ring finger as Beyonce sang, a cocky - if half drunk - look on her face as she did. 

You smiled at her. 

“He did put a ring on it,” you twisted the stem of your martini glass. “That’s why there was a problem when he put his dick in someone else. I think I’ll pass on the Beyonce. But thank you.” 

“Come on drunky,” your friend Dana looped her arm around Emily’s waist. “Let’s go dance.” 

“Woooo!” Emily threw her arms in the air and Dana gave you an exasperated but happy smile over her shoulder as she guided her to the dance floor. 

“Jesus, is it that late?” Parker looked at her Apple watch. You half smiled and took a small sip of your drink as she rifled through her clutch for her phone and let out a relieved sigh. “Thank God, Kevin hasn’t been texting with a ton of stupid questions. Why did I think letting a baby get totally attached to me was a good idea? The fact that she only said mama for two weeks was great at first but now that she refuses to do bedtime without me, I’m having regrets…” 

“Do you need to go?” You asked, brows raised. 

She winced.

“Would you hate me if I left you with the party animals?” 

You laughed. 

“No,” you said. “Go home, see your husband and kid. I really do appreciate the warm welcome back, you have no idea.” 

“See?” She reached across the small table and gave your arm a squeeze. “I told you, just like old times.” 

“Did you go back home at 10:30 to make sure a baby was properly put to bed when we were 18?” You teased. “I forgot that part…” 

She rolled her eyes. 

“Almost old times,” she said. “Besides, you love Bella.” 

“I do love Bella,” you said. “And I love you. Go home, I’m good.” 

“You’re sure?” 

“Positive. Text me when you get there?” 

“Of course,” she slipped off the bar stool and came around to give you a hug and kiss your cheek. “I really am glad you’re back. Even if it’s because Reid was a dumbass.” 

You just smiled a little and watched her leave, Parker pausing to wave to Dana on her way out the door. 

“This seat open?” 

The man from across the bar stood beside you, nodding to the seat Parker had just vacated. You smiled a little and nodded once. 

“You have very convenient timing.” 

“Well,” he shrugged. “Leaving a pretty girl all alone at the bar seems like a crime. Trying my damndest to stay on the right side of the law.” 

“And how’s that going for you these days?” 

He smirked a little. His cheek dimpled. 

“Well enough.” 

You looked at him, tracing the creases in his face with your eyes, the streaks of gray catching the low light of the bar. He was probably the oldest man there but damn, did he wear it well. 

“You in town for a visit?” He asked, turning his beer bottle in his fingers and nodding to your friends on the dance floor. “Seeing friends?” 

You cocked a little smile at him. 

“No, actually. Just moved back.” 

He raised his eyebrows, a look you couldn’t quite place passing over his warm features. His eyes drifted to your ring finger before he seemed to catch himself and look back at your face. You saved him the trouble, lifting your bare left hand and turning it so he could see. The indentation from your three carat engagement ring was still on your finger but your hand was empty. 

“I think we should talk, Joel.” 

Bar None, 10 years earlier 

The man across the bar had no damn business being that good looking. 

It was almost pissing you off how good looking he was. Tall, broad, with golden skin and thick, dark hair, he had the kind of face you wanted to explore intimately, in the way you could only do when someone was inside of you. The way men couldn’t control their expressions then was almost addicting. The way their eyes would roll back and their mouths would fall open, the way they stopped fucking around with pretense and just let themselves feel something - even if it was just your cunt - was beautiful and fascinating and almost elemental. It was like you could look into the very core of them for a moment, the way they always seemed to be able to look into you with just a glance. You wanted that with this man, whoever he was, this man who you caught glancing at you out of the corner of his eye. 

“Aww,” Parker pouted happily at her phone. “Kevin misses me!” 

“Misses you?” Emily snatched the phone from her grasp, gaping at the screen. “You’ve been gone like two hours!” 

“Will you just…” Parker snatched the phone back and looked at the text again. “And I think it’s sweet.” 

“You’re ditching us, aren’t you?” Emily sighed. 

“I think so,” Parker winced. “Is that OK?” 

You just smiled a little. 

“Go see the guy who’s got you all crazy,” you said. “But I’ll see you again before I leave town, yeah?” 

“Course!” She came and gave you a hug. “Good luck getting rid of me. Have fun at that thing tomorrow!” 

“Yeah,” you laughed. “I’ll try.” 

Emily rolled her eyes and judged Parker for a bit but it was less than an hour before she was leaving, too, with a man who’d asked her to dance and bought her a beer. 

“You sure you’re alright?” She asked as she went to leave. 

“Babes, I know how to be at a bar on my own. And my hotel is two doors down. I think I can figure it out.” 

She kissed your cheek. 

“Love you,” she said. “Try to have some fun!” 

You watched her go, thinking about just how long you wanted to be sitting by yourself at a bar versus in a Holiday Inn Express standard room when a voice appeared beside you. 

“This seat open?” 

The man from across the bar nodded to the seat Emily had just abandoned. You smiled a little and nodded once. 

“You have very convenient timing.” 

“Well,” he shrugged. “Leaving a pretty girl all alone at the bar seems like a crime. Trying my damndest to stay on the right side of the law.” 

“And how’s that going for you?” 

He smirked a little. His cheek dimpled. 

“Well enough.”

You smiled and introduced yourself before holding out your hand. He took it. 

“Joel,” he said. “Don’t think I’ve seen you here before.” 

“Because I’ve never been here before,” you smiled. “I’m in from out of town, my hotel is a few doors down. This was convenient and hey, the Yelp reviews weren’t the worst.” 

“What brings you to the great city of Austin, Texas?” He asked, settling in on the seat beside you. He was older than you but you kind of liked men that way now that you were in your mid 20s and exhausted by every man you’d dated in college. You liked them a little older, more established, men who knew how to cook their own damn food and give you your own damn orgasm. “Business or pleasure?” 

“Neither,” you smiled a little, taking a sip of your drink. “Family event.” 

“That’s not pleasure?” 

You laughed once.

“Not the way my family does it.” 

“That why you’re in a hotel and not stayin’ with them?” He asked, brows raised. 

“Bingo,” you replied. “I get in, I get drunk, I get out.” 

He nodded slowly. 

“Good system.” 

“Worked well enough for me over the years.” 

The two of you ended up talking about music and books and UT football until last call - far later than you’d intended to stay out. 

“Mind if I walk you back to your hotel?” Joel asked. “Not tryin’ to be a creep but… I’d sleep a lot better tonight knowin’ you got back safe. Promise it’s not a ploy.” 

“Damn, it’s not?” You asked, tucking your purse on your arm and heading for the door. “Because I was going to ask you to come up to my room if it was.” 

“Well shit,” he said, catching up with you. “Maybe it is a ploy then.” 

You found yourselves drawing out the walk back all the same, pace more of an amble than a brisk walk, but the hotel was so close that it really only added a few minutes to your walk all the same. 

“Well,” you smiled at the door to the lobby. “This is me.” 

“Yeah,” he nodded once, looking inside for a moment before looking back at you. “Look… you don’t owe me anything, alright? I’m not the kind of guy who wants to force something. I can just head on back to my truck, no hard feelings…” 

“Well maybe none for you,” you teased a little. “But I might have some. Unless you really don’t want to fuck me.” 

“Oh, I want to,” he said. “Trust me on that…” 

“Oh yeah?” 

“Yeah,” he laughed. “Been at the top of my list since you first walked in that place, baby, lemme tell you.” 

“Well then,” you jerked your head toward the door. “Why don’t we cross it off the list?” 

You took his hand in the elevator, his palm so broad, his fingers thick and long and callused in yours. You pressed your back against the wall and pulled him onto you so his hips were on yours and his nose brushed your own. His eyes ranged over your face, hungry and soft and open. 

“You sure about this?” He asked, looking down at the rest of your body for a moment before going back to your face. “Sure you don’t have something better to do than some old man?” 

“I’m sure,” you smiled at him, draping your arms over his shoulders. “Besides, I like old men. How old are you, anyway?” 

“Forty-five,” he said. “How old are you?” 

You snorted. 

“I’m not sure I should say,” you said, holding him a little closer all the same. “Since you’re all hung up on age…” 

“Not hung up on it,” he rolled his eyes. “Just… don’t need to be some youthful mistake is all. Wait, Jesus, please tell me you’re at least out of college, tell me you’re not a teenager…” 

You laughed. 

“No,” you shook your head. “Not a teenager. And I’ve been out of college a few years, I’m 25.” 

“God,” he closed his eyes and shook his head once, like he was trying to shake the idea of you loose. “Still, that’s… you’re…” 

You pressed your lips ever so slightly against his, more a quick brush than anything else, giving him every opportunity to pull back. 

He didn’t take it. 

Instead, he pressed his lips to yours, his hands going to your waist and tugging you tightly to his body while he pushed you back against the wall. Your arms got tighter to him and you opened your mouth, his tongue licking into you almost immediately. Joel didn’t need an engraved invitation, all he needed was a sign that you wanted him and fuck, you wanted him. More and more, each passing second, you wanted him. There was heat in you that was starting to flare so molten and hot that you pulled at his clothes, forgetting that you weren’t alone, not really. 

The elevator dinged and he all but sprang back from you, both of you panting for breath. 

“Fuck,” he breathed, looking you up and down, pupils blown. 

“C’mon,” you took his hand. “I’m down the hall.” 

You pulled him along behind you and fumbled to get your room key out of your bag. Joel’s wide, thick hands slipped around your waist as you did, tugging your ass back against his growing bulge and fuck, but he was huge. Thick and long and you knew his zipper had to be fucking killing him, cock that big and hard restrained by mere fabric and a slip of metal. His lips found the hinge of your jaw, your neck, down to your shoulder and you groaned a little as you clumsily forced the keycard in the door, the little beep the mechanism gave one of the best damn sounds you’d heard all night. 

The two of you practically fell into your hotel room. You dropped your purse on the first table inside the door and started stepping out of your heels as Joel turned you around to face him, manipulating your body to put you right where he wanted you and the fire in you sparked higher, brighter as he manhandled you. Every touch he gave was loaded with need, the air thick and heavy with it as he pawed at your clothes and skin, licking into your mouth at every opportunity, taking your chin firmly in his heady grip to tug you open further for him, all but forcing you to give him everything. 

You were as rough with his clothes as he was with your body, pulling so hard and fast at the buttons of his shirt that two popped free, pinging off the glass of the mass produced art that hung on the wall. 

“Shit,” you panted, looking around the dark of your room for the buttons. 

“Don’t give a fuck,” Joel replied, breathless, clutching you close and tight before you could pull away. “Didn’t really like this shirt, anyway.” 

You shoved it down and off as he tugged your dress down your body, leaving it in a pile on the floor before turning you so the backs of your legs were against the bed. He deftly unhooked your bra with one hand then, ripping the straps down your arms but almost reverently lowering the cups, panting for breath as he exposed your breasts to his gaze. Joel tossed your bra to the side before taking the soft weight of your tits in his hands, cupping them, brushing his thumbs over your hardening nipples as he looked down at you with a look of near awe on his face. You half expected him to shove you back down onto the bed after his race to get you undressed but instead, his arm went around your waist, his hand splaying wide over the smooth skin of your back and he pulled you tight against him, making you gasp. 

He moaned, deep and low, and dropped his head to your bared shoulder before trailing his nose over you to your neck, the wet heat of his breath on your skin. 

“Fuck, you’re so goddamn soft,” he groaned, almost pained, and pressed his lips to your throat, making your breath catch. You clung to the broad expanse of his back, fingertips pressing into him, trying to get at every inch of his skin that you could find. 

His mouth found yours and he gently, delicately, lowered you back onto the bed. He cradled your body against his own, keeping the firm line of him taut to you as he kissed you. Joel rested you on the mattress and you let your legs fall open so he could settle between your thighs, the heady weight of him pressing against your clit and making you moan. 

“You got a problem if I explore this pretty body of yours?” He asked, his lips still brushing yours when he spoke. “Because fuck, baby, seems like a sin to not touch every goddamn inch of you.” 

He rocked his thick, hard, still clothed cock against your core, as if to make his point, and took your responding moan as the yes it was. He trailed his lips slowly over your body, down your throat, your breast bone, your stomach, your navel. His nose brushed against you, his breath covering you in warm and needy pants. When he reached your underwear - the last thing still on your body - his fingers looped through the band before he paused, looking up at you over your stomach and between your breasts. 

“You still with me, pretty girl?” He asked, mouth so close to your skin that the wetness of his lower lip had caught on your stomach. “Still good with this?”

“Yes, Joel, please,” you were practically squirming. He was so close to precisely where you needed him it seemed like you might melt with the want of him. “Fuck, please…” 

“Fuck, you’re even prettier when you beg,” he said and started to pull your panties down over your hips. You lifted yourself up off the bed to help and it wasn’t long before you were naked below him. He knelt in front of you and took your knees in his hands, parting your thighs for him and groaning when he did. 

“Goddamn,” he breathed, so quiet you weren’t sure you were meant to hear it or if he’d meant to say it out loud at all. “Just… fuck.” 

He opened your legs enough to lay between them, settling with your thighs over his shoulders. His thumb traced a slow, tender path over your slit, brushing your clit and making you gasp when he did. 

“Swear you’ve got the prettiest fucking pussy I’ve ever seen,” he said before he pressed his lips to your leaking hole. He moaned as he did and you couldn’t help but thrust against him once. He pulled back from you just a little, his nose barely touching your clit as he did. “Needy little pussy, too, huh?” 

Your fingers knotted in the bedspread and Joel’s mouth found your clit, softly sucking the sensitive nub between his teeth to tease with his tongue. You fought the urge to rock your hips against his face, trying to remember that this man was practically a stranger, not a lover whose tastes you knew intimately. But that was hard to remember as he worked his way lower, his tongue slipping inside of you with a deep groan. 

Joel ate you like you were a delicacy he longed to savor. He started slow, tasting and teasing you open, before delving deep like he couldn’t resist it, his thick tongue exploring and finding the soft and tender places inside you. His thumbs spread you open wide to him, his nose against your clit and you couldn’t stop yourself, you rolled your hips against him. He moaned into you and you forced your hips down on the bed, trying to clear your head enough to be still. 

“Sorry,” you panted. “I didn’t mean to do that, you’re just… really fucking good at that.” 

He stopped and pulled back from you enough to look up your body again, a frown on his face, your slick glistening on his beard in the light from the parking lot outside. 

“You think I don’t want you fucking my face?” He asked. “Fuck, baby, I want nothing more than for you to take exactly what you need. Want you to make yourself come on my face, you understand?” 

You swallowed and nodded. 

“What are you going to do?” He asked, voice almost stern. 

“Make myself come on your face?” You more asked than answered. 

“Better sound more sure than that,” he said, fingers moving to your clit. You gasped and moaned at the contact. “Come on baby, what are you going to do? Say it. Own it.” 

“Come on your face,” you panted. “Fuck, Joel… I’m going to come on your face, I’m going to make myself come on your face, please…” 

“Good,” he said, going back to eating your pussy. 

It was like he’d been holding back before but had nothing stopping him now. His tongue pressed deep, his nose nestled in your slit to nudge your clit, his arms looped over the thickness of your thighs to keep you open for him while also pressing the softness of you to the sides of his head. Your orgasm built quickly, the heat in you sinking to your core, everything inside you there going taut and tense. You were just on the edge of it, whimpering below his tongue and his touch when one hand left the warmth of your thigh and moved to your slit, his finger sliding inside you alongside his tongue. He pressed into the soft, tender place inside you that seemed to elude other men, finding it with an almost practiced ease and moaning when he did, sending the sparks of your climax shooting through you. 

He groaned, needy, as he ate you through it, not letting up, not even for a second until your orgasm had subsided and your head was swimming. 

“Fuck you feel amazing,” he pulled himself from you, sucking the finger that was inside you clean before wiping your slick from his beard while his other hand traced over the smooth softness of your inner thigh. “Should’ve asked this sooner but… please tell me you’ve got a damn condom. I wasn’t exactly lookin’ for this tonight, not until I saw you, so I’m not exactly prepared.” 

“I do,” you propped yourself up on your elbows, trying to remember where the hell you left your suitcase in the dark. You spotted it on the dresser, thankfully still mostly organized since you’d arrived that afternoon. You nodded to it. “Suitcase, top zipper pouch inside the lid.”

He got one, the crinkle of foil strangely loud in the silence of the room. 

“Here,” you sat up and reached for him as he came to stand between your legs at the edge of the bed. “Let me do it…” 

He gave you the packet and you opened it before palming the condom, holding it tight in one hand while slipping the other into the open zipper of his jeans and into his underwear to find his thick, heavy cock. 

You moaned as you wrapped your fingers around his length, hard as steel wrapped in silken skin, and you stroked him, just half way up his cock at first before going from root to tip. He was dripping there, his arousal making his head slick and wet. You brushed your thumb over his leaking tip, the smooth skin making your mouth water. You looked up at him through your eyelashes as you leaned forward to lick him before taking just the very end of his cock between your lips. You suckled at him gently, lapping up his precome, Joel’s breaths getting heavier and faster as you did, before you took him into your mouth. He moaned as you sucked him, his hand going to the back of your head and holding you against him, your nose brushing against the base of his stomach. You took his head into your throat and moaned around him as you sucked him, making him hiss in pleasure, his grip on your skull tightening. 

“Fuck, woman,” he managed as you kept sucking him. “Gonna make me come if you keep doin’ that…” 

You pulled back from him slowly, his hold on you easing as you did, until he slipped from your mouth, still slick with your spit. 

“Should probably stop then,” you said, a little breathless. You took the condom - warm now from the heat of your hand - and put it over his head before rolling it over his thick shaft. You stroked him once, twice and leaned forward again, sucking his tip for a moment when it was in place and his head tipped back, staring at the ceiling as he groaned. 

“Jesus,” he panted. “Fuck, you gonna let me inside that soft little pussy of yours or make me come in your mouth?” 

You laughed once, needy and low, before pulling yourself backwards on the bed, Joel’s eyes hungry on your body as you went. He shucked his jeans and underwear off before crawling, finally naked, between your thighs. His head brushed against your sex and he took the base of his cock in his hand, trailing his tip up and down your dripping slit before spreading you open for him, your pussy swollen and tender as he did. He put his tip against your dripping entrance, pressed just the very end of him inside, barely opening you to him. His hands moved to your thighs, brushing over them to your knees before trailing back toward your center, his fingers splayed wide over you soft flesh. 

“You ready, baby?” He asked, needy. 

“Yes,” you breathed. You’d passed ready a long time ago. You were desperate now, aching and all but begging for him to take up every empty space inside your body. 

“Good,” he pressed forward until his head was fully inside your tight channel and you both moaned with it, one of your hands finding the smooth skin of your breast and squeezing it. He groaned at the sight as he started fucking just the tip of him into you, rocking in and out of you in short, sharp bursts. “Fuck, there you go baby. Just like that.” 

He started feeding you more of his cock then, driving further into you with each stroke until he fucked all the way into you, his hips flush to yours, his thick length stretching you open, the burn of him meshing with the heady pleasure of being so utterly full. 

“Goddamn,” he breathed, his cock buried inside you totally. “This pussy… fuck me.” 

One of his hands went from your thigh to over your hip coming to rest and the soft swell of the base of your stomach. He spread wide over your skin, his palm swallowing the space over where he was inside of you and pressing down, making you moan as the tight fullness inside you got more intense. His thumb stretched down toward your clit and he started working you there as he just held himself within you, making your cunt throb once around him. He groaned at the feeling. 

“That’s right,” he said. “So full of this cock ain’t you baby? Taking me so damn well…” 

He kept working your clit for a minute, not moving inside you, just pressing into your skin until you were practically writhing below his touch. He was so big, you were so full, the pleasure in your body so tight. It made your head spin. 

“Joel,” your fingers scratched at the blankets. “I need you to move, please, please, please…” 

“Please what, pretty girl?” His voice was dark, low. 

“Please fuck me,” you begged. “Please, please fuck me, please…” 

He drew back then, achingly slow at first, watching where his cock was pressing into you with a hungry look on his face, before thrusting back in, deep and firm. 

This, you thought, was why you liked fucking older men. Joel knew what he was doing. He worked your body with expert skill, grinding his cock deep inside so his head pressed against the most sensitive parts of you, the thick drag of him making your back arch and toes curl. He kept rubbing your clit with his thumb, the pressure and pace keeping your pleasure building and building but never quite cascading over the edge. 

He kept fucking into you that way until you were desperate, your whole being drawn tight and achy around his cock. He’d stopped watching where your bodies were joined and had moved to your face, his gaze drinking in your desperate little moans and the way your eyes would scrunch closed as you got so close to coming but didn’t quite make it, whimpering as your climax fell just out of reach yet again. 

“Got you so tight and needy, hm?” He said, breathless. You just nodded, trying to rock your hips up against him but held in place by his hand on your stomach. “Why don’t you tell me what you need? Tell me exactly what it is you need.” 

“To come,” you whimpered. “Fuck, I need to come, you need to let me come, please let me come…” 

“Think I’ve been keepin’ you on the edge too long?” He asked. “Think I should let this little pussy come? Let her just milk me dry?” 

“Fuck, please,” you begged, not caring if you sounded pathetic. It’s not like you’d see this man again after tonight, anyway. 

He took his thumb off your clit but before you had a chance to whimper in protest, he adjusted your legs to drive somehow deeper and leaned over you, pressing his bare skin to yours before kissing your neck, sucking and licking at the tender skin there as he fucked into you, making you whimper, your nails scrabbling over his back. His lips moved from your neck to your ear, his large hand coming to cup the crown of your head, his pace never relenting. 

“Come for me,” he whispered, low and needy. “You can come, want you to come, want to feel you come. Just let go for me, just give in to me.” 

His hips rocked against your clit, his cock buried so deep and you saw stars for a moment before you cried out, your orgasm hitting you hard after being on the edge of it for so long. It broke your whole body down, muscle clenching desperately, blood rushing, fingers clinging. You felt it everywhere, starting at your core and radiating out in hot, aching waves. 

“Goddamn, that’s it,” he fucked you through it as your core fluttered over him. “Just keep comin’ for me, just like that, feeling so damn good baby just…” 

He pressed deep as your orgasm started to fade and moaned, the sound going straight to your raw, fucked out cunt. The pulsing of his cock, in you to the root, rolled you into another orgasm, this one less intense but still making your pussy grip him close and tight as he spilled into the condom. 

He collapsed on you for a moment as both of your climaxes eased, his chest heaving. Before his weight became too much, he adjusted, rising up enough to kiss you as he slid his softening cock from your body and falling flat on his back on the bed beside you. 

“Damn,” you panted after a moment, staring up at the ceiling. 

He laughed lightly beside you. 

“Know the feelin’.” 

You lay there next to each other, listening to each other as your breaths came back into a normal, steady cadence. Goosebumps started to pebble over your skin, the air cold as you were naked without his body on yours, the air conditioner below the window humming along. 

You turned your head to look at him and he did the same. 

“Should probably go…” his voice trailed off but he sounded reluctant. Or maybe you just hoped he did.  

“You don’t have to,” you said, probably a little too quickly for a man you’d just met. Even in the dim light of the moon and the parking lot lights out your window, you could tell he raised his eyebrows. “I’m just… you can stay, if you want. It’s a big bed. Think we can manage it.” 

“Wouldn’t want to impose…” 

“You’re not,” you said. “You can leave, too, if you’d rather but… don’t feel like you have to rush out.” 

He smiled a little. 

“Then I’ll stay. I’d like to stay.” 

You smiled back, that blissed out and relaxed feeling you had after you came settling over you.

“Good.” 

The two of you settled far across the bed from each other at first but drifted quickly, until your head was on his chest and you were curved around his side as his arm wrapped around your shoulders, his fingers trailing up and down your arm until you fell asleep. 

He was somehow even more beautiful in the light of day. 

You realized it as the two of you went about the strange intimacy of getting ready for the day side by side with someone you didn’t know. He blinked sleep from his eyes when first woke up and stretched his back before getting out of bed, his curls haphazard and messy and his body soft and warm. He got dressed and ran his fingers through his hair, trying to tame it. You offered him your travel toothbrush as you got dressed and he watched you pull on your jeans as he leaned against the bathroom doorframe. 

“Been a while since I’ve done this,” he said, a little hesitant. 

“Just how long?” You asked, teasing as you pulled on your shirt. 

“Longer than I want to admit,” he said, small smile making his cheek dimple. “Long enough that I don’t remember exactly how this is supposed to work but… I’d like to take you to breakfast. If you want.” 

You smiled. 

“Sure,” you said. “I’d like that.” 

Joel walked back to the bar and picked up his truck before taking you to a diner not too far from your hotel. You laughed with him about menu typos and the questionable song choices coming from the speakers over greasy eggs and toast soaked in butter. 

“Know we just met,” he said as you were on your fourth cup of coffee and you were both avoiding the fact that you’d have to leave this table and go your separate ways soon. The remains of your hashbrowns had long gone cold, ketchup smeared across the plate and you weren’t ready to say goodbye to him yet. “And that you’re in town for some family thing but… if you’re not busy tonight, would you want to come with me to this party? Buddy of mine is throwin’ in, supposed to be nice. Think he gave me a plus one in hopes I’d actually use it.” 

“Damn,” you winced a bit. “I really wish I could but the thing I’m in town for is tonight.” 

“Damn’s right,” he smiled a little. “Think you’d be my best shot for a good time at that thing.” 

“Yeah, back at you for my thing,” you laughed.

“Here,” he pulled his phone from his pocket and unlocked it before handing it over. “Put your number in. Maybe we could still get together later…” 

You took it but hesitated, thumb tapping on the side of his phone case. 

He frowned.

“What?” 

“I live hours away,” you said. “Is this really smart?” 

He shrugged. 

“Don’t really care if it’s smart or not. Just want to see you again. If you’ll let me.” 

You smiled a little and shook your head before putting your number in his phone. 

“There,” you said, handing it back over. “Let me know when you’re done with your thing. I can think of a few more ways to get some good use out of my hotel room.” 

Two more cups of coffee later, Joel dropped you off at your hotel. You kissed him goodbye in the cabin of his truck, moaning against his mouth before pulling away. 

“Alright, go before I come back in with you,” he said playfully, reaching across you to open your door.

You laughed. 

“Don’t tempt me,” you got out and paused before closing your door, taking one last chance to look him over. “If we don’t see each other again… It was good meeting you.” 

“Good meeting you, too,” he said. “But don’t worry. I’ll see you again.” 

You went inside, looking back over your shoulder once you were in the lobby, Joel’s truck still sitting near the doors as he waited to make sure you were safely inside. 

There was an odd sense of loss in you as you got ready for your parents’ big anniversary party. You hadn’t expected to meet anyone when on your trip back to your hometown, let alone someone you liked so much. You’d been single for a while, doing things alone didn’t really bother you. But now, you felt this tug of desire to have him getting ready beside you where you could help him with his tie and he could zip you into your dress. 

But that was stupid. You knew it was stupid. Your job had taken you to Memphis and you liked it there. You weren’t in a rush to move back to your hometown. And Joel had a business here. It wasn’t going to happen. It’d be a lot easier in the long run if you just accepted that now. 

You showed up early to the party, your older sister wanting help to get things set up in the tents outside. 

“Who all is coming to this shindig anyway?” You asked as you put pictures of your parents out around a guest book near the entrance of the tent. 

“Oh, you know,” your sister waved you off. 

“Not really,” you said. She gave you a look. “What! I haven’t been home for a family party in… well, it’s been a minute.” 

“Yeah, and I’ve been the one doing all the work to help with those for a while,” she said. 

“And you’re definitely not bitter about that…” 

“Not one bit,” she teased. “But the usual people. The closest neighbors, the aunts and uncles, Mom’s book club, church people, Dad’s friends…” 

“Dad has friends?” You gaped at her. “Since when?” 

“He’s had friends for years!” 

“OK, he’s never had friends,” you said. “Where is he finding friends? Shit’s unnatural…” 

“Don’t let them catch you saying shit,” she said. “And there are a few from work, one from this basketball league he joined…” 

“Ew,” you crinkled your nose. Your sister laughed. 

“Definitely not ew,” she said. “At least not the basketball friend one, he’s weirdly hot, it’s disturbing…” 

“Well, there’s no accounting for taste, is there?” You teased. 

“You’ll eat those words when you meet the guy,” she said. “Just wait.” 

“Whatever you say,” you rolled your eyes, skeptical. You and your sister had never had the same taste in men, you didn’t see any reason for that to have changed. 

But still, you were keeping an eye out for this mysterious hot friend of your father’s as people started to arrive for the party. Or trying to, anyway. You kept getting pulled away by distant relatives you hadn’t seen since your cousin’s wedding or to do a favor for your mom as she frantically rushed around trying to take care of everyone while also trying to have fun at the party that was being thrown in her honor. 

Everything was in full swing when you heard your father call your name from across the large, increasingly full tent. He waved you over, leaning around a man he was talking to, and you worked your way around the dance floor, trying not to think about how much you’d like to have a date at this damn thing - how much you’d like to have Joel as your date at this damn thing - when you froze beside your dad. The man standing next to him was devastatingly familiar, even from behind. Tallest man in the room, broad shoulders, thick curls. Your heart beat faster. 

“Hey honey,” your dad said, tugging you closer. “Want you to meet my friend. Joel, this is my youngest that I’ve told you so much about.” 

He turned around, a beer bottle in his hand a smile on his face that fell the moment he saw you. Your dad was saying something else but you didn’t hear it, too busy staring at the man who had been inside you less than 24 hours earlier. 

The man who had you thinking about what life alongside another person would be like. 

The man who was apparently your father’s friend. 

“Hi,” he said after your dad had stopped talking. You hadn’t noticed. 

“Hi,” you said, still staring at him. 

Fuck, you were in trouble. 

Part 2

A/N: Here's whatever this is. He's unhinged, I don't know what's happening to the Joels who live in my head lately but they're just going crazy up there. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it! Love you!

[cinnamonest]

I assume this is because I criticized Kamala Harris in my last post.

I want to address this because it's important to me and frustrations currently consuming my life, and I'm very emotionally unwell right now. I want to share my experiences and make a point I feel is important at this time.

Once again, this is very unfitting of the smut fanfiction blog and will be deleted later, even though I'm sure this is a huge follower-losing post, but whatever.

Forgive me for rambling so much, but I encourage you and people who think like this to read in entirety.

I realize things are tense right now in the US.

Part of the reason for my inactivity the past while (besides multiple hospitalizations) is that I'm glued to my screen every night now because I'm very scared. I've been spending all my time researching, watching videos from economists, etc.

(Preemptively, sources for everything I'm about to say: the FEMA Privacy Act Statement itself, the official CPB database, Helene People Finder, United States Council of Foreign Relations, Samaritan's Purse, NYC.gov, Starlink, Politico, ABC, CNBC, georgia.gov, nc.gov, tn.gov, my own life)

The US is an extremely high-tension, polarized political climate, largely due to the bipartisan system.

However, no one should be immune from criticism.

All politicians should be criticized when they do harm. I am allowed to criticize her, and I will.

Criticizing one candidate is not the same thing as endorsing/supporting their opposition.

3,000+ Appalachians are missing. The current death toll makes this the deadliest single event in the US since 1862. A higher death toll than Hurricane Katrina, a higher death toll than the events of 9/11/2001, a higher death toll than any mass shooting.

However, it is largely going completely ignored, and mainstream news media has barely acknowledged it, in part due to elections, but largely because the people who live in Appalachia are poor, rural people. And the harsh reality is that poor people's lives are not treated with the same value as people of higher classes.

FEMA continues to do nothing, and the feds are now threatening to take children away from homeless parents... yet they blocked donations of trailers and campers from nearby areas that would help those people to, you know, not be homeless. A kind group of Amish have come down from Pennsylvania to build shelters, and FEMA may tear them down too since they don't have "permits."

Harris had the opportunity to do something, and has the authority to order FEMA agents to act differently, but she chose to exploit the situation for publicity, then leave and otherwise ignore them. She then went on to pay Beyonce $10,000,000 to speak for 5 minutes.

That deserves to be criticized.

Her campaign continues to claim a good economy and job market, when inflation and cost of living has peaked, and just this month, their policies actually have officially led to one of the worst employment outcomes the United States has seen since the Great Depression, disproportionately affecting low-income workers.

That deserves to be criticized.

She has a bad track record during her time in the judicial system for the way her actions harshly affected underprivileged people, especially Jamal Trulove, who was terribly wronged.

That deserves to be criticized.

Furthermore, the reason FEMA/the government does not have money for Appalachia is for a few reasons, all of which were ordered, facilitated or allowed by the current administration:

1) we've sent over $100 BILLION to the IDF so they can keep blowing up hospitals and kindergartens,

2) we sent $175 BILLION to Zelensky so he can keep sending young men into violent deaths even if its against their will,

3) we just sent $100+ million to Lebanon even after the hurricane crisis, meaning the federal government explicitly chose to prioritize foreign aid over its own people,

4) money was taken directly from FEMA reserves for crises like ours, and used as part of a whopping $150,000,000,000 spent on mass migration — including free flights, a $20 million welcome center with a free-use "game room" with dozens of Xboxes plus free food/lodging, and in NY, an average of $1400 prepaid debit card per individual each month.

Meanwhile, Appalachians get a one-time $750 per family, and if you have insurance to cover anything, it's a LOAN you have to pay back (many "fact-checkers" are claiming this is false when its literally in the FEMA eligibility statement). Many of the independent line workers FEMA hired for repairs are reporting they have not been paid AT ALL since starting.

In other words, the money that was specifically reserved for saving lives in times of crisis was spent on video games and free money handouts.

That, holy hell, deserves to be criticized.

Secondly, I want to address the message itself.

I realize that a lot of the american tumblr userbase is 1) people young enough that they're still partially financially dependent on parents and/or 2) are, like most of the US statistically, earning middle-class incomes, and live in fairly population-dense environments.

Most people outside the US, on the other hand, are getting their perceptions of life, politics, etc in the US from the posts/narratives of people within the aforementioned groups, popular culture, and their own local media, so their perspective is often quite limited, to no fault of their own. I'm sure my perspective of life in other countries is also very limited.

Most of you live in places other than where I live, and live very different lives from mine. As humans, we are naturally prone to subconsciously assuming the lives of others are not too different from our own, and do not naturally stop to consider how various factors might affect people's lives and decisions.

We are social beings, prone to adopting the beliefs of others who have the same experiences and thereby the same limited perspectives as us, especially in ideologically homogenous environments.

However, I have just as much of a voice as anyone else.

My hope is that I can use my words and experience to foster empathy for one another between different people in a very polarized climate at a very tense time.

I'm originally from a fairly rural community of about 8,000 people, largely low-income, low-education, evangelical blue-collar workers and farmers, in the Bible Belt.

It is well-known that this demographic overwhelmingly voted for Trump. I don't deny that. I visit home a lot, I see the yard signs everywhere, flags hanging from pickup trucks and farm fenceposts, lots of red hats.

There is a reason for that.

The administration of the past four years has utterly destroyed many rural, low-income communities.

It caused a huge spike in job layoffs, leading to homelessness, drug abuse, hunger and poverty for many already low-income people, and for select communities, violent crime.

I'm fortunate enough to have had parents better off than most of the community, but I'm self-sufficient now, and I am in the bottom 20% of incomes in the US, even with a degree. I could write endless paragraphs on how hard it is to get by, but to summarize for the sake of shortening — it's very, very rough.

Everything has become drastically more expensive, very rapidly over the course of a few years. Groceries are 3x their 2021 prices. I had to get a guarantor for a one-bedroom apartment.

Many rural families resort to drastic measures to get by. Small farmers are being financially strangled out of their way of life.

The actions of the Biden-Harris administration is the reason a huge portion of my extended family was laid off and now face total destitution, as there are simply no jobs left available.

The Biden-Harris border and crime policies are responsible for the brutal rape of a significant number of women and girls in this geographic region. Statistically, these rapes have quadrupled compared to the previous administration.

A woman was raped and stabbed to death about a mile from where I live.

Our nearby neighbor, a cow farmer back home, was attacked on his own property.

I have personally faced multiple instances of sexual harassment and aggression, some of which were very frightening. I know other girls nearby experienced the same or worse.

Alcoholism and hard drugs due to the spike in unemployment and poverty has ruined many lives, and help is often hard to access in rural regions.

A woman my mom was acquainted with ended her own life in 2023 because her children were taken from her due to her drug addiction and poverty. People I played with on the church playground as kids are now unemployed heroin addicts.

I've watched my mom driven to tears after realizing how drastically her income tax increased, and how little she has left after them despite working around the clock.

All of these can be traced back to the policies and actions of the current administration, and the current Harris-Walz platform's proposals will drastically increase it all — largely voted for by people who live in economic situations and locations as such that they are fairly unaffected by these consequences, so they may not understand how it affects these people.

I could write endless paragraphs of all the people I know who have been at best negatively affected, at worst utterly ruined, by the current administration.

Since I have the unique background of understanding these people whilst having more liberal values as an individual, with a broad range of people I interact with now, I have tried to have discussions on this over the last year or so, in real life and virtually. I believed that raising awareness would make people on the left-leaning side empathize with them, and inspire dialogue to work to implement ways to account for the concerns and needs of the rural poor, and incorporate that into their existing proposals.

I was incorrect. I've been very polite and respectful in how I address others in these discussions. In the vast majority of interactions, I was not given the same in return.

A few were receptive, which I appreciate, but in most of my experiences, the same group that is known for encouraging empathy, apparently doesn't apply that philosophy to people they dislike — no matter how I presented it, they immediately rushed to demonize, censor, humiliate, shame and gaslight me, and expressed callous apathy at best, if not active contempt, for my people.

They say "that doesn't happen," and I think they genuinely believe that due to limited perspective — but the reality is that they're simply in a position of privilege as such that it isn't happening to them.

Similarly, what you have to understand is that from the perspective of many rural people in red areas, their experience is that more privileged people inflicted this suffering on them by voting for it, then silence and shame them for speaking out about it.

Likewise, they also have a limited perspective — for them, the issue I see is that they adamantly believe the "other side" is already well-aware of the effects their choices have on others. I don't think this is true, I think many on the other end are unaware of these issues.

This dual lack of understanding creates mutual resentment and bitterness, which fuels tension.

I will say that trying to explain how girls in my community were assaulted or my own harassment, only to have it spammed with replies along the lines of "don't care" or "deserved" or calling me a liar, seeing posts mocking or wishing harm on people like my family accumulate tens of thousands of likes, having people I care about referred to as "trailer trash," passive-aggressive statements implying I'm too unattractive for a man to harass — this, along with other distasteful actions I've seen, has pushed me away from the left as a community, and I don't think that's unreasonable.

Similarly, labeling people you know nothing about as bad people, without making any effort to understand their circumstances or what they actually believe and why, will drive people away and make them resentful.

My community is multiracial, women are highly valued in southern culture for various reasons, and they themselves are marginalized and underprivileged. They're kind people who have been good to me.

I haven't really met any people who are hateful, nor is hate the reason for their votes — they're all voting as they do because they are scared, exhausted, grieving and desperate. A lot of people in the area never voted before, but are now registering to vote in droves because they feel their backs are against the wall, so to speak.

Moreover, Orange Man himself redirected $14 million dollars to Appalachia, continues to raise awareness for them in speeches, and Musk, who is associated with him, has a team working to help Appalachians. He's also the only noteworthy figure that has acknowledged certain issues affecting them.

They realize that the situation in Appalachia could just as easily be them in the future, that they'd be given the same treatment.

This has resulted in a lot of rural poor people feeling that he cares more for their lives, compared to Biden/Harris who more or less neglected them. Which, considering that, is a fairly reasonable conclusion on their end.

Finally, it is true that blue voters tend to be in favor of abolishing or ruining crucial aspects of our way of life that, I say this politely, they do not fully understand, while the people here want to preserve their way of life.

So, while I have more liberal values that differ from most people back home, I don't believe they are bad people. They are reacting very reasonably to the circumstances they're in.

All I ask of others is to consider, no matter where you are or what beliefs you align with, and no matter what happens tomorrow, that the "other side" to your own may not be the evil people you have been led to believe they are, but are humans whose lives are simply different from yours, and they are acting in accordance to their experiences, circumstances, and fears.

The growing trend of demonizing political opposition with no attempt at empathy, only creates more pain in the world. I hope this has helped to foster better understanding, and that people can be kind to one another.

That is all I wanted to say.

[pauking5]

my heart calls your name

Pairing: Roronoa Zoro x reader

Genre: modern life mutual pining, friends to lovers, there's spice, smut, fluff, Zoro is a normal being with feelings and reader has personality

Word count: 20.1k+ (new recount)

Part 1

A/N: This is the sequel to New Year, New Me :) Firstly, I would suggest reading Part 1 before this one. Secondly, I started working on this as soon as I finished the first part and it has been a wip for 3 months. It was supposed to be a Valentine's gift but my writing went into a slump. But, I pushed through and wrote it. It went through so much editing, simply because I wanted to get Zoro as right as possible. He's everything to me so I wanted to give you an almost perfect piece of him.

Lastly, prepare for a long rollercoaster of everything. Literally everything.

Now playing: Did It Again - Shakira, we can't be friends - ariana grande, Sometimes - MUNA, Eres Mia - Romeo Santos, Only Love Can Hurt Like This - Paloma Faith, All Night - Beyonce, La La Lost You - NIKI, pretty boy - M2M

(because I couldn't pick just one song :') )

Early morning of January 1st

Heels and green-haired man on your arm, you walked around looking for a place to eat in.

The sand between your toes felt warm, welcoming to the first glimmering rays of sun. The sea just as excitedly splashing on the shore to wash away the old and bring new tides afloat.

Though early, the air buzzed with the atmosphere of the previous night as faint music was still playing from houses nearby.

You passed by multiple cafes and diners but they all closed early in the morning rushing to go on holiday. Every knock on the door was met with an apologetic smile, sending you out to venture further down the beach in hopes of finding at least a vendor that was still selling food.

Just when you thought all hope was lost, you spotted a restaurant that was still open. Today's menu was plastered out on a board outside with the schedule that said they're still serving for a bit. Just enough to grab a bite.

Picking out a table overlooking the shimmering azure sea, you went to pull out a chair when Zoro stopped you to do it for you. Shaking your head with a smile at his gentlemanly mannerisms, you sat down as he pushed it closer to the table before sitting down on the opposite side.

You scoured the menu, stomach twisting in hunger at all the food combinations. Salmon on a bed of baked wedges, mussels boiled in white wine, even your usual chicken tenders - this place had everything. It was hard to pick just one thing, but you had to make up your mind before your insides started digesting themselves.

Zoro didn't have it any easier than you. He perched the menu in one hand while the other sat on his chin as he contemplated what looked awfully like the drinks page. From the way he bit his lip in thinking and the way his sleeves were messily made up to his elbow, he himself looked appetizing enough for you.

"Something tells me you're not that hungry," he flashed you a knowing smirk under the pretense that he was looking at beverages.

"I am," you stated, sheepishly diverting your eyes back to your own menu.

"Then why are you browsing me instead of today's special?"

At that you closed your menu flat and sat back, folding your arms over your chest.

So, audacity is indeed a manly thing.

"You are scrumptious, I'll give you that," you admitted, narrowing your eyes at him.

"Only that?" he wiggled his eyebrows from behind his menu and you couldn't help but break into a giggle at his playful behaviour.

Is this the same man I drank a whole bottle of champagne with last night? I'm pretty sure he slept less than I did but he seems more energetic than anyone could ever be this early.

Interesting man.

"We'll see," you said, pulling your lips into a thin line to prevent a grin that would give away most of your thoughts about him that were, let's say, more than scrumptious could entail.

The waiter came over and took your order with a little flirting around you. Though sweet in his remarks, you had to admit he had nothing on the man sitting in front of you. But, you engaged in it simply because you wanted to gauge an innocent reaction out of him. And you did.

Seeing Zoro's hand tighten on the tissue box like it was one of his mortal enemies, you smiled internally. So, he's territorial too. Poor paper crunched under the strength of his fist, knuckles white from making sure no corner escaped its crumpling demise.

Once the waiter was gone with your orders, he let go and leaned back in his seat looking out at the sea.

Your eyes landed on him accidentally, being met with a different side of him. One so different from the man you were used to seeing so rough and isolated in his corner at the club. Because right now, he looked so at peace, like this was his natural habitat - close to the sea, spirit dancing in the glimmer of the sun with the golden sands in the background.

The soft morning breeze caressed through his green locks, moving them in calm waves mirroring the ones out on the shore. His golden earrings jingled around each other like they were singing their own tune cradled in the arms of the wind.

His shirt was now fully dry from your late night shenanigans in the sea, with a few more buttons let loose giving you a peek of his tanned chest. Palm curled around his chin, looking out into the all blue, there was not a thought harbored behind those deep brown eyes.

A heavenly dream walking planet Earth.

The small twinkle reflecting in the corner of his eye made you look out to the water too, curious as to what was so fascinating out there. Though this time, it was his turn to sneak a peek at you while you weren't looking.

His jacket was still snugly wrapped around you, long sleeves neatly rolled up to the cusp of your forearms. Your hair was thrown in a messy bun with a few loose curls falling over your collar bones. Though tired circles rimmed your eyes from staying up with him the night before, talking about everything and nothing at all, your lips were pulled into a soft smile. As if you had the most restful sleep. In his arms of all places.

And that made something bloom in his chest. Something so unknown yet so familiar, almost like the anticipation of what could be if he let his walls down. Only god knew that he was ready to let them all fall down if this was the beginning of something good. Something that he's been waiting for a long time.

But he had to give it time. Rushing into anything ruined everything. Deep down in his gut, in the place he trusted his instincts the most, he had a feeling this was worth waiting for.

It wasn't long until your food arrived. After a long debate, you settled on a creamy shrimp pasta because who doesn't like pasta? You could eat pasta at any time of the day and your stomach would thank you. Although, Zoro's fried chicken wings looked so much more inviting for some reason.

Maybe it was the way his eyes closed in delight at the taste on barely his first bite or how he gobbled on them with all the sauce streaming down his lips like they were the very essence of immortality. But those wings looked divine.

He saw you ogling his plate as you mindlessly poked a shrimp around and was about to ask if you wanted one when you just reached out and stole one. You dipped it quickly in the sauce before his plate and stuffed the whole thing in your mouth, sighing in the same delightful manner he did.

Those were some amazing chicken wings.

"I was just about to offer you one."

"Food tastes so much better when you steal it away," you said, licking your fingers off the leftover sauce.

They were just your regular chicken wings. Deep-fried and golden, meat coming off the bones so tender. But something about them being placed so neatly on his plate made them taste so much better than they would have if you ordered them yourself. Or maybe it was just the fact that he munched on them so hungrily.

Whatever it was, you were glad you grabbed one and left him starring back at you dumbfounded.

You turned back to your pasta and forked a shrimp. Before it could reach your mouth, a firm hand wrapped around your wrist and your fork was redirected to Zoro's lips instead. He bit the shrimp off of it, imitating the sound of delight you previously let out after stealing his chicken wing.

"Hey! That was the shrimp I kept for last."

"That's too bad," he said with his mouth full. "It looked too good to be left for last."

"Then I will have this one," you stole another chicken wing. "And this one and that one and-"

"Then these little shrimps are mine!" he took your whole plate of pasta away leaving you with the stolen wings hanging in the air.

That's how you ended up sitting next to each other sharing your dishes together. You kept poking at his as he did with yours, thing that became a custom for you in the coming month.

Breakfast, lunch, dinner and everything in between, they were all consumed and enjoyed together in each other's presence.

Among a few other things.

Grocery runs whenever your fridge was empty, since he liked crashing at your place more often than you could count.

Movie nights spent debating all the romcoms you could find where he would give you a piece of his mind on how much of a douchebag the main lead was and yelling at the tv 'stop being an idiot and go get the girl' on the usual like he lived for it. The neighbors ended up at your door sometimes, asking you to have mercy on their ears and keep it down.

Whenever romantic scenes came on screen, your fingers would always find each other on top of your plush couch, tangling together just lightly, barely above a soft brush. But he would never admit that he was a romantic at heart. Not even when he smiled to himself when the main characters kissed. Not even when his hazy eyes, soft hands and raising heartbeat gave all that away. Not even when your own beat wildly, inviting him in.

You even went to the gym together a few times, though that endeavor ended as quickly as it started.

"Come on, push it. Bend your knee more. One more time!"

"I'm really trying to, but this is heavy as fuck!" you pushed the leg press feeling the weight thrash your ham strings apart.

"Your body will thank you tomorrow."

"Not if I die today," you gritted out.

"Tell you what. You do three more and you can flip me off all you want."

"I can do that without breaking my knees. What's in it for you?"

"You grant me a wish when I ask for it."

"What kind of wish?" you perked an eyebrow up in suspicion.

"You'll find out when the time comes."

Determined to get your rights of the bet fair and square, you pushed with all your might and completed one. With some struggle and curses, you managed one more push before you felt your knees give in, accepting defeat.

That was probably your last leg press forever since you deemed it the demon's machine.

Your legs dropped like dead weight on the floor, heaving breaths as if you ran a full marathon. Disappointment hit you that you lost and had to honour a bet, while the man beside you broke into the biggest grin you've ever seen on his face since you've met. It felt magnetic to see him like that, a small nudge pulling at your own lips. One that you tried to hide. What loser is happy when his opponent wins?

"You owe me now."

If he was a girl he just might have squealed. He was literally beaming with joy.

"Spare me the pride bullshit and give me water."

He handed you his own bottle as he crouched down next to you. Patting the sweat on the side of your face with a towel, he made sure to swipe dry even at your baby hairs that were sticking up on all sides.

When you told him you wanted to try working out with him, though you weren't big on physical exercise, he was over the moon. Studying you with gleaming eyes as you laid on the bench, drenched in sweat beyond the human normal, with your cheeks filled with water to the brim, you were a sight to behold.

He knew you wouldn't believe him if he told you, thinking it was just another one of his flirty lines, but you were glowing brighter than the bright sun outside. That golden glow that gave plants and flowers light and warmth to glow had absolutely nothing on you.

"I'm proud of you," he uttered out of nowhere catching you off guard.

You turned and just looked at him. He wore his gear but did not make a move from beside you the whole time you were at the gym. He trained you on his usual routine, toned down to your own pace, but it turned out to be way harder than he made it look in all the times you were there to just spot him.

He made working out look like an art. Effortless. But he refused to lift a finger for his own gain, set to just be your own spotter for the day.

He was there coaching you through it all the way. When you felt like you couldn't do more, he helped you put a little bit more into it with little encouragements like these. An I'm proud of you or Keep going or You've got this, muttered as he corrected your form or changed your weights.

"You're gonna have to carry me home," you breathed out, stretching your aching limbs. "You know that, right?"

"I know," he accepted his demise. "That will be my exercise."

"Are you saying I'm as heavy as the dumbbells you're lifting?"

"You said it not me."

"You little shit."

You were the biggest homebody that's ever homebodied but somehow he managed to do the impossible and get you out of the house.

As romantic as the outings seemed sometimes, he acted like it was just two good friends hanging out.

Nothing more, nothing less.

And that bugged you. Because this wasn't friendly behaviour.

Friends don't take you out on a walk at 2 in the morning when you can't find sleep, twirling you around to let loose in the dead of night, with a lone streetlight lighting your way.

Friends don't hold your hand as jazz music plays in some edgy café you wanted to try, playing with your fingers that always end up caged between longer, muscular ones as you talk over a steaming cup of coffee.

Friends don't look at you like that.

Like you could be more, mean more, feel more.

Maybe you were being selfish, but the more time you spent with him the harder it became to part ways. Even if you saw each other the next day, it just wasn't enough for you. You started wishing he would stay a little more. Hold your hand a little more. Look at you a little more.

Then, ass slow January turned into warm February, your feelings evolved and you craved to have him around in more than just one way. You wanted him in every way.

Slowly but surely, and a little against your will, you found yourself falling for the green-haired guy you kissed on new year's.

And boy, you fell hard.

Present Day

Valentine's Day.

Oh, how you dreaded this one too. Maybe even more than New Year's.

Maybe it was the over-exaggerated displays of affection from strangers on the street, plastering kisses on each other's swollen lips like they would die without getting into a heated make-out session every five minutes.

Or the way the florists had heart-shaped balloons tied to bouquets mixed in pinks, whites and reds in every single window.

Or the fact that most chocolate was on the best sale price you could get it just because it was a special occasion.

All of it was just a ploy to say love exists and that the world will stop at nothing to capitalize the living hell out of it.

But that was just part of the reason you carried an anti-romantic persona around today. This time you had a reason. There was a love interest on your horizon and you were annoyed that he was too lost drifting in his own world to notice how enamored you were becoming with him day by day.

It was crazy how fast you fell for him. For Zoro.

You promised yourself that fast love wouldn't be the norm anymore after what happened the last time. That you would take your time to keep it steady, consistent and cautious. That you would protect your heart well this time.

Until he crash landed into your life, ripping the safety net that you've threaded for so long at the seams so skillfully, little by little, until you were free-falling into his own. A safety-net that didn't want to let you go once it caught you in its hold.

You needed him. As simple as that. The flirting, the sweet-talking, the teasing. Every time you saw him it was all just Cupid's hidden stash of poison arrows aimed and shot deeply into your heart. To make you fall in deeper into an unfamiliar ocean where you couldn't see the top of the water, sinking in the endless stream without a way out.

You needed him. Before you would go and make a fool of yourself and ruin the great bond you already had for some feelings. Before he would sew his existence onto your soul, your conscience, your very being completely and it would become too much to bear. Too much to live without.

You needed him. To stop yearning. To stop wanting. To see how loving him could feel like.

The digital clock on your bedside table read 2:30 pm. You sat in bed most of the day, whizzing through tv channels faster and faster with every romance movie playing, every news channel talking about this wretched day and how lovers planned to spend it, every love song playing on the radio.

Romance was everywhere and you couldn't do anything to escape it. Just hearts and chocolate and red everywhere.

Sick of the world and the pure existence of love, you shut off the tv, throwing the remote to the other end of the bed and watched the seconds on the clock trickle away, wishing for this day to finally come to an end.

You flipped on your back, letting out a long sigh as the empty ceiling gave way to thoughts of him again. Sighing, you closed your eyes trying to think of something else. Anything else. The wide beachfront, the azure sea, the warm sand. But all roads led back to him. All those things were connected to him now.

You kind of expected him to make some plans with you. Even if it was something as small as going to get coffee and walk around. Or watch another romcom and dissect it. Though you knew he wasn't one to do things like that on the go. Not on a day like this.

It wasn't even a minute that he crossed your mind and your phone screen lit up with his name. Cursing telepathy thinking and the universe for loving to bask in your misery, you picked it up finding a surprisingly nervous Zoro on the other line.

"What's up-"

"You, me, tonight. Pick you up at 5?" he rambled quickly and out of breath.

"What?" you asked, trying to make sense of his words.

"I want to take you out tonight," he repeated, a bit more composed than the first time.

"That sounded a little better," you smiled, turning around in bed to flip on your belly.

"Can I take you out tonight?" he asked again, voice way softer and determined than the usual playfulness you grew accustomed to.

What happened to overly cocky Zoro?

"I don't know," you drew out, playing with the hem of the duvet to smoothen the material out, pointer finger spelling the outline of his name absentmindedly on top of it. "Can you?"

You heard him sigh exasperatedly on the other side as you took your sweet time replying. A little payback for waiting so long would hurt no one.

"Jesus, woman. I really want to take you out someplace nice tonight so get dressed as comfortable as you'd like and answer the door at 5. That sound better?"

"It sounded great. I'll be waiting."

"Okay." You could literally hear him smile through the phone. "See you at 5."

"See you at 5."

The call ended and you stared blankly at the ceiling again, hugging the phone to your chest. His words started seeping into your brain and the realization that he finally asked you out on what was possibly an official date made you reach for the pillow closest by to scream into.

"OH MY GOD I'M GOING ON A DATE," you yelled. "Okay, play it cool. Play it cool," you took deep breaths to calm down before something else threw you into panic. "What the fuck am I gonna wear?"

You ran to your closet, throwing it open. Racking through it in a haste since you didn't have the luxury of time, you threw whatever you could find that looked somewhat put together on the bed. Clothes came flying on and off your body as you did a whole catwalk show in front of the mirror only to end up disappointed with every single one of them. Huffing out in desperation at the mess around your room, you came to the conclusion that none of the outfits looked fit for the occasion.

You needed something to make his eyes pop out of his sockets. Something that would make him see what he's missing and to take that extra step to you. Something...

Tapping your cheek in thinking, you spun around to your closet with a gasp. You ran back to it and sorted out through more hangers, digging all the way into the back until you finally found it.

A dress you bought specifically in case you ever got a date that was worth putting in the effort for.

The heart stealer, you called it.

A flowy deep-red satin dress, falling just below your knees. It had a sweetheart neckline and straps to hold your jewels better than a bra ever could, the bodice hugging your middle perfectly too. Elegant, sexy and comfy, all in one. Plus, the ends of it twirled so nicely every time you spun around, imitating a petticoat effect, and the length even complimented your height.

She's the one, you smiled.

The time on your phone read 4:57 pm, three minutes before your agreed pick-up time. You've been struggling to put your earrings on for a while now and were growing slightly nervous, thing that wasn't really helping as your hands shook with a burst of impatience. Putting the earrings down before you accidentally pierced your ear, you let out a breath and looked in the mirror. Which made it all worse.

Your eyes jumped around to analyze the way your hair was down and curled unevenly, if you squinted, to how your eyeliner on the right looked slightly more winged than the one on the left. Even the dress straps sat on your shoulders a little too uncomfortably. Suddenly, your confidence faltered and you questioned everything about your outfit.

Is the dress too comfortable?

I'm underdressed, aren't I?

Where is he even taking me?

I look like a walking cherry. Why do I have so much red on me-

A soft knock echoed through your apartment. Your date was here. Taking a deep breath for reassurance and fixing yourself in the wall mirror one more time, you let it be and moved to open the door.

At the door, you were met with the man that plagued your every waking thought. He wore a loose shirt that looked vintage with a few buttons left open and casual dark navy blue tailored pants, falling loosely from his waist. They gave the impression he was taller than he actually was. The way he dressed without as much as batting an eye, you would raid his wardrobe any day.

He leaned forwards to place a courting kiss on your cheek, the closeness engulfing you in his musky vanilla scent you grew so fond of. You could scent him in a crowd of people like a wolf looking for his lost mate. His lips lingered enough to have blood rush to your cheek, feeling it singe as soon as he pulled away the slightest. It surprisingly made you feel calm, forgetting what you were even stressing about in the first place.

Shaking yourself out of the daze, you stepped aside and invited him inside. Something in his hands completely stole your eyes away from him before he even got the chance to offer it to you.

"ARE THOSE MILKA HEARTS?!" you shrieked as he meekly handed you the chocolates. Your heart raced at the gesture, cradling the box closer.

"I have never seen anyone be so loyal to just one brand of chocolate. It's literally all you eat."

"Because they are amazing and they're not too sweet or too expensive. They have so many flavors, even biscuits, ice cream, hot chocolate. Anything you could ever dream of that could be made out of chocolate, they have it. They're just right and perfect," you smiled as you spun around with the box held closely to your chest like it was your most prized possession, the ends of your dress slightly swirling around you.

"Oh, I know," he chuckled at your obsession with the chocolates. "You literally lick the hot chocolate mug clean after you drink it."

"Can't blame me for having a sweet tooth. Thank you for these." You placed them on the counter, deciding against opening the box just yet.

"Do I get something in return for delivering them to you?"

You saw his plan from a mile away - he was chasing a kiss, this time coming from your own initiative. Before you thought it through, your lips were on their way to connect with his cheek in a short but sweet peck.

"How does this do?"

Before you let go, he tensed and you felt it, grinning mischievously on the inside. If he thought you would shy away, especially tonight, he had another thing coming. Two can play this tango.

"Your sweetness is rubbing off on me."

He's saying that as if you didn't catch the slight twitch of his lips and the faintest tint of pink on the tip of his ears before he turned back to being his serious self.

"Is that such a bad thing now?" you countered.

"To be assessed," he piped up, leaning against the counter as he watched you pace around the apartment to finish getting ready.

"Tease."

"You love it."

"I actually hate it."

"You're such a bad liar."

"Maybe, maybe not" you giggled to yourself.

Truth be told, you enjoyed his teasing a lot even if it was overwhelming sometimes. On most days, it made you forget your worries and he managed to pull a smile so genuine out of you that you didn't even know you had.

"You, uh... look nice by the way," he rubbed the back of his neck, taking in your attire from top to bottom properly this time.

Nice wasn't even the word he wanted to use. Beautiful, gorgeous, sexy, those sounded more like what he had in mind. The more he looked at you in that red dress, the more he had the urge to close the distance between you, press you against the mirror you paced in front of and smudge that cherry tint off your lips with his own, all the while his hands tangled in your curls.

That... that felt like more than what nice could ever encompass.

"Thank you," you said, the surprise present in your voice cracking him out of his thoughts. "So, what's the itinerary for tonight?"

"It's a secret."

"Is it now?"

"I want you to have a nice time and not overthink it too much. So, you'll just have to wait and see."

"Okay, mister Kinder Surprise. I'll just follow your lead on this one."

Normally, he would come up with an idea and you would plan out the itinerary down to the smallest detail. You weren't sure what he had in mind for today, but at least your outfits matched in comfy and classy levels.

Going back to the mirror, you took another look at yourself and realized he was right. You did look nice. You were just overthinking it. Funny how he already knows what sets you off from enjoying yourself.

Grabbing the earrings again, you tried putting one hoop in only to have it slide to the other side. The closing was just too narrow for your small ears and it annoyed you greatly. You were ready to just leave without them when Zoro stepped in the mirror frame next to you. He held his palm out to you looking at the earrings and you obliged with a sigh.

Placing your hair behind your ear, he wiggled the golden hoop around your ear lobe as you watched through the mirror. The proximity sent your heart thundering. You willed it to stop and take to a regular rhythm before he took note and teased you even more.

Looking for something else to focus on, you found his reflection in the mirror, holding the earring with utmost care and attention. Your eyes flew to his and the tug at his lower lip, the concentration on his face making you blush. He was determined to get those earrings on your ears no matter what.

"My ears are just too small for girly shit," you said, looking down to avoid his intense gaze.

"They're not. You're just a really impatient being when it comes to doing things properly for yourself," he said, successfully clipping the earring in. "There. See?" he tilted his head to look at you with that twinkling glint in his eye. "Pretty."

I could kiss your lips right now. And your eyes and your nose and your lips again. I don't think I could stop.

"Dork," you pushed him away, conscious that you were running behind on time. "Come on, I can't go out with only one earring in."

"Give me a second, Speedy Gonzales."

He put the other one in for you as well and rolled them around so they were both facing the same way.

"Look at you," he checked you out from head to your unheeled toes. "You look like you came out of a shop window."

"Oh, yeah? Which shop window?"

"The supermarket."

"I can change into my pajamas sooooo fast and you can just go out by yourself," you patted his chest grinning wickedly. "How does that sound?"

"Okay, okay. I'm just messing with you," he handed you your bag and held out his arm to you as a peace offering. You rolled your eyes at him and put your heels on using the sturdiness of his arm for balance and fixed yourself up one more time. "Ready to go?"

"As ready as I'll ever be."

He walked you out front to his car, opening the door for you as he held his arm to his chest like a butler while you did a little curtsy before you got in. A little running joke between you since you always ended up being the passenger princess. His passenger princess.

Everything about his car was so Zoro. He drove a dark green jeep, convertible when needed but currently patched up since the rainy weather of early spring was more frequent now. A raspberry Charmander air freshener dangled from the rearview mirror, where you put it on your last grocery run. He constantly argued with you over the fact that its too cute for his car.

"My car is a military tank. Not the Kids' Express," he would say.

"If anything, it's giving the Fun Express now."

But you knew he silently loved it. He had a habit of poking it with his finger each time he got in the car so it would spin around, spreading the fresh smell of berries around.

He got in the car placing the key in ignition and poked it. You smiled turning to look out the window. Kid.

As he drove, the scenery changed from the chaotic city jungle of cars evading rush hour to the more peaceful part of the coastline. The sun was just starting to set, bright orange and yellow painting the sky in lively hues. Some pop song played on the radio making the whole scene look even more tropical.

Zoro rolled the windows down, letting the air flow through and put the song a little louder. You caught up on this habit of his pretty early on - if he heard a song he liked he would make sure you knew it too. Even when you were sitting in heavy traffic and everybody looked at you weirdly. If he knew the song, he might even mumble a few lines with a grin. That made your little crush on him even stronger.

Hope that you will wait for me You'll see that you're the only one for me ~

The lyrics blared over the speakers, emotional yet comforting about falling in love. He leaned back in his seat and snuck a few glances at you. Your hair was blowing in the wind, falling on the back of your seat. Arm laid flat on top of the window frame tapping along to the beat, you looked at the view of the seaside with a smile on your lips. Your other hand sat on your knee, a little too lonely for his liking.

All I really want is to hold you tight Treat you right, be with you day and night Baby all I need is time ~

Adjusting a hand on the wheel, his other one stretched to get a hold of yours, intertwining them together to the beat of the song. Your heart skipped a beat at the sudden contact turning warm atop your thigh. Looking down at your entwined hands, you noticed how his thumb covered yours in guarding, a routine you grew familiar with every time they met in the same space. His eyes were trained on the road but the small smile tugging at the corners of his lips was solely directed at you.

You will be the death of me, Roronoa Zoro.

Parking the car turned difficult considering everyone was out and about tonight. You barely found a spot somewhere next to the beach. Once parked, Zoro got off and came to your side extending a hand to help you down, heels landing safely on the sidewalk.

You were getting a little impatient and you hoped your nerves wouldn't get the best out of you when the air was still so clear between you. But the questions itched on the back of your tongue until you couldn't hold them back anymore.

"So, what's the plan? How much longer are you gonna keep me in the dark?"

He turned to you with a mysterious grin, debating on whether he should tell you or not.

Someone seems to be enjoying themselves at the expense of my sanity.

"The plan for tonight is just fun."

Well that explains everything I needed to know.

"The amusement park up ahead kind of gave that part away," you pointed out to the Ferris wheel bathed in strobe lights, standing tall ahead in the middle of dozens of games and food stands.

Walking side by side, you followed the crowds of couples into the mayhem still suspicious of what the plan actually entailed. Your gaze wandered down to the ground where you found another thing that calmed you. Unknowingly, your steps matched each other's in a balanced rhythm as you followed his lead. Your lips pursed to hide another small smile.

"That's not the only thing I have planned out for tonight," he informed you, checking his watch. "First, let's go loosen up a little."

Your first stop on tonight's itinerary was the club where you first met. It's been a few months since you both laid eyes on the other, circling the dance floor for nights on end to make your mutual interest known.

Months since your little crush born out of seeking real love took off and made space for feelings. Feelings that nowadays chased you to the brink of madness. You could only hope a trip down memory lane would settle them and give you confirmation that your heart isn't tangled in yet another unrequited love story.

It was Latino beats night. The extended terrace was cleared for an outdoor dance floor, stretching all the way to the end of the beach touching the overlapping waves. Fairy lights hung above from tree to tree, warming up the atmosphere in a golden glow. The drinks at the bar had mini red umbrellas to match the theme.

A bartender came to serve you as soon as you sat down at the bar, pointing you to all the Valentine's recommendations. The cheesy names on the cocktails made a shiver run down your spine in repulse so you turned to the normal range instead since you already knew that one inside out.

"What would you like to order?"

Some sweet liquid courage would do me well tonight.

"A piña colada for me," you ordered.

"A mocktail of that for me," asked Zoro, almost as quickly as your own order rolled off your lips.

Mocktail? That sounds unlike Zoro.

Lifting a curious eyebrow at his request, your eyes narrowed on him for a quick mood scan. You barely saw it but it was definitely there. Tension. He was on edge, rapping his fingers on the wooden bar restlessly, foot tapping to the tempo of the current song playing. Impatient sounds more like it.

"Not drinking today?"

"I will. Just not yet," he smirked, as if he had more opportunities to drink lined up later. Well, frankly, you didn't know what followed later, so you asked for more glasses of alcohol.

The song changed to a slow, sensual bachata as the crowd took to the dance floor. Some pairs looked experienced, busting moves in perfect sync with the strings like this was their regular night out to serve some class. They must be fun at parties.

Others could barely get their feet coordinated, unable to decide who would be the one to lead. The changing rhythm, slow at first then rising faster, had them spinning out of control, gripping onto each other for dear life as they laughed it off and tried again together.

Your relationship with Zoro was kind of like that - uncoordinated in your dance to reach each other's heart with normal steps. Every time one got way too close to the other you took detours, going back to square one. But you kept trying. Together.

Zoro saw you looking at the couples with a longing he's seen before, during your first nights at the club. He wasn't an idiot. He knew that longing himself though he didn't know how to express it. But a tight-lipped curl of your lips at the ground had him pulling on your hand in an instant, eyes motioning to the dance floor. Confused at first, you slowly got a rough idea of what he was suggesting and shook your head.

"I'm not drunk enough to dance yet," you lied, trying to get him off your case. You were too sober to trust your heart that close around him just yet.

"Isn't that the beauty of it?"

The tension washing off of him just moments ago wore off into mischief and playfulness. There he was. Your Zoro.

"Are you sure that was a mocktail?" you quipped, suspicious at his sudden change in mood.

"Yes, it was a mocktail." The look he gave you, full of intensity and certainty was enough to tell you he was dead serious. "I just really want to dance with you."

"Okay, fine."

His hand grasped yours as you hopped off the bar stool, pulling you deeper into the moving crowd. Once he found a spot, he tugged you to him in a twirl. Your back landed against his chest, his deep, steady breaths falling right at the tip of your ear. Swaying from side to side, his palms wandered down to your own, lacing your fingers together, squeezing lightly. His touch turned your insides sticky with something akin to desire. His familiar scent overpowered your senses, musky vanilla turning tropic from that mocktail he had, lingering to the depths of your soul. His presence behind you, assertive, dominating and reassuring at the same time, lit up your whole body with fiery tingles.

He lifted your arms up, getting impossibly closer to you as the pads of his fingers reached up to yours, dancing down to your shoulders in a flow of their own where they fell with the rise of the chorus, briskly spinning you to face him. He placed your hands on his shoulders as you stepped back and forth, bouncing up and down to the music, eyes solely trained on you and no one else, nothing else.

In the synergy of the moment, he finally saw you.

It took him a while to understand but you were his rhythm. He couldn't lose you after he finally found it - the frequency of your heart beating to guide his own. If he lost track of you now, he would lose himself again. Among all the other hearts beating in hundreds of other tempos next to yours, he only wanted to move with yours.

You swayed right a little too hard, leg flying next to his hip. His arm shot out to catch it as the on on the small of your back pulled you close, breaths mingling in a flutter harmonious to the one in your stomach, multiplying it tenfold.

Upon releasing your leg, his hand trailed over the thin material of your dress, from your thigh all the way to your waist, where it got a better grip. One that wouldn't let you sway that hard again. Goosebumps burned on the path he carved into your skin and you found yourself closing your eyes on a shaky exhale.

You were shuddering in his hold and he barely did anything but hold you. When you opened them, he was still eye to eye with you, unmoving, patient, waiting for you.

He drowned out everyone else. The chatter, the music, the alcohol pumping through your veins. You couldn't take your eyes off him even if you tried and frankly, you didn't want to.

No words needed to be said as you let your bodies do the talking. The smaller the space grew between you, the simpler things seemed. It was clear as day your heart kept calling for him in a million ways and you denied it enough.

You wanted to have his eyes on you at all times. To have his lips all to yourself. To get the confirmation that he felt exactly what you felt. That he wanted all these things you wanted too.

He spun you out, reeling you back in against his chest. He looked down at you. You looked up at him.

They were close - those damned lips of his. Pink and soft laying on pink and even softer. Just a breath away. Until he broke your gaze.

Whatever bubble you were in popped and all too suddenly, the reality hit you again. They weren't yours to kiss. They were no ones. Forbidden.

The music filtered in your ears way too loud. People bumped into you from all sides. It was too much in too little of a moment to drown in your insecurities again, when his warm touch asked for your attention and his eyes met yours again.

"Wanna get out of here?" he rasped in your ear.

"You read my mind."

The sky announced the coming of night, faint purple clouds flying above the blue. You headed to your next destination, the amusement park. Looking at all the attractions, you had your first pick on the bumpy cars. They were childish, but they were fun enough to pull you out of your misery. At least for a while.

Hopping into the rink, you were barely strapped into your bumper when he rammed into your back at full speed, rattling your seat hard. He really is a child. But you were a bigger child. You didn't hold back either, chasing and cornering him, only to crash straight into the front of his bumpy car, cackling like a maniac.

At one point he disappeared into the crowd of cars as the lights grew dimmer. Keeping your guard up for a sneak attack, you rounded the sidelines cautiously, trying to avoid being caught in the middle of other people's warfare. Just when you stopped to turn and search the rink again, he marched up to hit you from the side only for you to dodge it like a pro. His car rammed into the edge of the rink, jaw dropped in shock as you bellowed with laughter at him.

His driving pride got shaken a little from your bumpy car skills, but you were smiling again. That's all that mattered to him.

Once your time was up, you were pulled to another ride, this time of Zoro's pick. Knowing him, it would be something too adventurous and risky to ride. You realized where he was taking you way too late - the highest roller coaster in the area. Instantly, you shook his hand off, backtracking behind him. That thing looked like what nightmares are made of.

"Hell nah, I am not getting on that."

Thinking you had a choice was a mistake since he pulled a wildcard on you. A wildcard you wished you never agreed to in the first place if you knew it would come back to bite you in the ass.

"Remember that bet we had at the gym that you lost?" Motherfucker. "I think it's time you make that wish come true."

And to think he gave you the impression it would be an innocent wish back then. All men do is lie.

"That's not fair," you argued, trying to think of a way to convince him to use his wish on something else. Something that didn't involve your stomach switching places with your other organs. Coming empty handed, you slumped your shoulders like a child being denied their favourite toy and got in the line with him.

Your leg bounced up anxiously with each pair admitted for a ride in front of you. The screams of the people on the rollercoaster screeched in your ears. You took a gulp of air to calm your nerves just as Zoro's lips brushed to your ear out of nowhere, almost giving you a heart attack.

"Nothing's going to happen to you. I'll be there to hold your hand."

Is he taking the piss? Hold my hand? How about you hold your balls secure before I kick them to the fucking sky-

Your thoughts were interrupted when something clicked fixed around you. The straps to the ride seat. You squirmed around uncomfortably to find a better position that felt safer, but being in that seat itself was not safe in any way. The straps were safe and secure but not safe enough.

"Zoro, I'm getting off."

To your disappointment, the megaphone called out that the next cart was going up and the ride started moving. Despite having multiple piña coladas at the club to calm your nerves, you still felt the panic grip you a little and grabbed a tight hold of the security holds keeping you in place, shutting your eyes and praying that this torture would end sooner.

"Hey, hey, hey." His voice called out to you softer than you've ever heard it before, willing you to focus on him. "Look at me."

"No, thank you," you chuckled uneasily. "If I open my eyes I will see my impending doom," you continued, feeling your heart thrumming in your chest as the ascent began quicker than you expected it to.

"Then give me your hand."

"I want to smack you over the head with it." Tremors took over your hands slightly, aware of how high you were going. "Why did I agree to this?"

"Because you like keeping to your word and it's something I admire about you."

He does? Oh, that's sweet- Wait I'm still mad at him.

"Please don't give me the compliment bullshit right now," you groaned through deep breaths.

"It's true though," he said, keeping his calm composure.

You cracked one eye open at him to see him looking only at you, anchored to your eyes like you were his view of the safe harbor in the tempest, the eye of the storm far away from reaching you.

Suddenly, everything was fine. All was good. It was just you and him on the same boat going in the same direction. Nothing could rock your boat.

Until you felt the ride stop and the urge to look around grew and despite all efforts, you gave into it. You were standing on the highest point, overlooking the whole park. You stopped breathing just looking around at the point ahead on the horizon where the sky met the sea, surprised to see the moon and the twinkling stars peak through the cover of clouds. The view would've been spectacular if it wasn't a few seconds till the train would drop.

"No no no, don't look-" he tried to warn you before you did the opposite.

"WE'RE GONNA FUCKING DIE!" you screeched.

"-down."

"If we don't die now, I will kill you myself when we're back on the ground for choosing to make such a stupid wish. I swear to GOD-" you were cut off as the train fell down into the drop.

Against your wishes, you grabbed onto his hand and held on for dear life, screaming as loud as your lungs could let you. You let out everything you've been holding inside for the past month in one strong yell. Zoro let out a few surprising yelps too, holding tighter onto your hand. The whole thing was over and done with before you knew it and you found yourself actually enjoying it. Not one hundred percent but a good amount of you did.

All that work to curl your hair only to get a blow out when you got back to the ground. It stuck up all sides, curls dismantled from the sheer force of the drop but still standing. Your hands patted it down with a pout, making Zoro take the matter into his own hands, brushing through your hair to fix it. His hands felt so soothing on your scalp, taming your earlier rage at being dragged to that death trap.

"You acted all cool only to yelp like a school girl during the drop," you giggled, his yelps still fresh in your mind.

"No, I didn't," he argued.

"I think the people that sat behind us would beg to disagree. At least own up to the fact that you were a teeny tiny bit scared."

"I don't fear anything."

"Oh yeah? Look behind you."

"What could possibly be so scary behind me- WHAT THE FUCK!" he yelled as he came face to face with a person dressed as a clown, carrying around balloons. He almost punched them on impulse.

"I don't fear anything my ass," you looked at him as he put down his fist and apologized. Once he was certain they left, he straightened his posture and cleared his throat.

"I was just startled," he said, trying to assure you that the statement he made was true. But you got used to seeing through his bullshit.

"Sure you were. Wanna try the haunted house over there then?" you pointed to the shack where a few people just ran out from, some full on sobbing. A scream came from inside, his eyes going wide and that was all you needed to know. Roronoa Zoro did have fears.

"Absolutely not."

"You sure? Nothing's gonna happen to you. I can hold your hand," you teased him like he teased you before the rollercoaster ride.

"Did you say you want popcorn? I'm gonna go get us some popcorn," he laughed, looking for an excuse.

"Okay. Meet you by the benches?"

"Sure."

Walking around, you stumbled upon a long queue of couples lined up to go on the Ferris wheel clogging most of the circulation around the park. If you were being honest, the rollercoaster was much more fun than waiting for hours to see an overpriced five minutes coast view could ever be. Besides, you could drive up the road and see that for free too.

You walked around some more when one of the stands stopped you in your tracks - throwing darts. It wasn't the darts game itself that piqued your interest, but the fluffy beige bear smiling brightly, hanging above the targets. His brown eyes matched those of your green-haired man, warm chocolate infused with honey, too sweet not to stop and stare.

For some reason you found it really lonely sitting by itself up there. All the smaller prizes were won and replaced on the daily, but by the looks of it he's been there for a while, waiting for someone. No one seemed sharp enough to play the game to the end and take him home.

You wanted to take him home with you.

If only you had the darts talent running in your veins. The price for just a set of three darts was way too much and it took seven perfect shots in the bullseye of the targets to win the bear. Perks of having an amusement park next to one of the most popular beaches on the coast meant complicated games that no normal human could aspire to win.

Sparing it one last look that made your heart ache, you turned and went to sit on a bench, waiting for your date that just so happened to see you stop by the darts booth. More precisely, he saw that pout on your face as you looked at the bear hung up high above the targets when it clicked. You wanted that bear.

Zoro knew you wouldn't ask him to get it for you. You didn't like asking for things and he knew that you might not even accept it if he offered it. But the way your shoulders slumped as you walked away told him how much you wanted it.

Darts wasn't his best sport, but he was good with his aim and had a patience that could kneel most at his feet. So, he marched to the booth, placing the popcorn tubs to the side and started tracing his targets to see just what he was dealing with.

"Feeling lucky tonight?" asked the manager of the booth, a sly smile on his face at finding another victim.

Little shit. If only he knew Zoro had the power to send his little business into bankruptcy right at his fingertips. A grin of his own graced his features making the man's smile quiver at the seams.

"Oh, I'm feeling more than lucky."

He rolled up his sleeves showing he meant business and placed a wad of cash on the dirty table, picking up his first set of darts. He was dead set on getting you that bear no matter how much money he had to blow on throwing tiny arrows around.

Anything to not see that pout on your face ever again.

Shuffling your heels over the dust and rocks on the ground, you drew random patterns to busy yourself. A lot of things were weighing on your mind. You were questioning why you went out in the first place. To give this a chance, your brain told you.

To feel something, said your heart. Well, with Zoro, you felt the whole damn universe in one sitting.

There was no telling how this night would end anyways. But you were slowly starting to think Zoro ditched you there since it's been a while he left to look for popcorn. You sighed again, feeling your world tilt, when a pair of shoes stopped in front of you. You knew those shoes.

"I thought you left to get popcorn not to shake hands with the mayor-," you lifted your head up only to stop mid-sentence. Staring at him like he grew a third eye, you took in the way he balanced two tubs of popcorn under his arm and a big plushie in the other.

The fluffy bear.

"I did. They were out so I went to find another stand. And this is for you," he offered you the bear with a smile that made his dimple pop out.

That small indentation in his cheek that showed up when he puffed them on the inside, usually at times when he did something he was proud of. A pit you could hide in whenever you wanted to without him knowing.

"Buddy looked a little lonely up there," he added, tilting his head back to the booth behind him.

Looking into those plastic brown eyes, you took the bear and hugged it close to you. It was even fluffier than you thought a plushie could be. You snuggled into it noticing that it lightly caught his scent, besides the sugary theme park smell.

You teared up a little. Not out of sadness or anything, but because you were touched by the gesture. Because he noticed, which was a rare thing to come by nowadays. Zoro cared and he showed you time and time again, never once falling short to notice. To make you feel seen.

Sensing a change, he placed the popcorn down on the bench you were sitting on just moments ago, grabbing a gentle hold of your arms.

"Hey," he spoke softly, trying to reassure whatever storm pried onto you out of nowhere. His palms stroked your forearms up and down, earlier glee in his voice morphing into worry. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," you shook your head looking away. It was stupid to have a crying session right now of all times.

"You look like you're about to cry. Did I do something wrong?"

"No, no! Gods, no. You didn't. You're amazing," you smiled. In an instant, your arms reached out to wrap around his waist hugging him as tight as you hugged the fluffy bear.

"Thank you, Zoro," you nuzzled your head into his chest in deep appreciation for more than the bear, hands holding tight onto the back of his shirt.

Your sudden display of affection made his ears grow pink. He silently hoped you couldn't hear the way his heart was beating from how your head was pressed to it. He wasn't sure how to respond at first but hesitantly, his arms wrapped around you too, squeezing you closer for a moment. His chin sat on top of your head as he let out a deep sigh at the comfort it brought him. If only he could hold you like this all the time.

There weren't enough words in the world to express your gratitude to him. For how well he treated you. For everything he did to make you feel happy. You just wanted to do the same for him. At least even for a little bit if this wasn't going to last.

"You're welcome," he smiled softly at you as you pulled apart from the hug. "Now, what are we naming this little guy?"

"Well, he definitely isn't little," you barked a laugh holding the bear up next to your hip. Now that you were seeing him closer, he was half your size. "I'll name him Lovey and I will be his Dovey."

"Does that mean I have competition?" his arms crossed on his chest, playing jealous. "He does seem like a worthy opponent."

"I didn't realise you were a runner-up, tough guy," you patted his chest to calm his coyness down a notch.

"Did I not make it clear enough?"

I think you and me have very different definitions of clear.

"I don't know," you teased. "Did you?"

"Guess I have to go for Plan B," he said, checking his watch again.

He checked that watch of his hundreds of times tonight. Was he in a rush? Is his prince charming cover going to dissipate like Cinderella at midnight or something?

"What's Plan B?" you asked confused, hoping he would let some information slip.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" he smirked tauntingly.

This man is an ore of surprises.

You've been waiting for Zoro in front of the park for a little over half an hour. He left to look for his car a while ago and there was no sign of him yet.

Huh, funny how I keep waiting for him. Both physically and emotionally. When does it end?

The sky turned darker and grey clouds rolled over. You felt uneasiness creep up on you, especially since he mentioned a Plan B. If the club and the amusement park were Plan A, what did Plan B look like in his book?

Five more minutes passed and Zoro returned, surprisingly by walking instead of driving, car keys swinging around in his hand.

"Zoro, where's the car?"

"So, uh, bad news. I lost the car," he smiled apologetically, pressing his hands together.

"What do you mean you lost the car? It's a huge jeep. How hard can it be to find a huge... jeep," you motioned around only to stop as you realized most of the cars around looked exactly like his. "Oh."

"Yeah, charm of living on the coast. But good news is that we are in walking distance from my place which was final destination. Though that surprise is kinda ruined now."

"I don't know what exactly you have planned at your place though," you stated, fishing for details.

"You have a point. Well, I can just come and look for it tomorrow."

He says that as if it's a daily occurrence for him to lose a jeep to the hands of sense. Though that made you think. Just how many times did he lose his car around here? But you'd rather not ask. So you asked something else.

"Won't you get a ticket?"

"Most parking around here is free."

"That's fine then," you shrugged, getting up with Lovey under your arm. "What about Plan B?"

Come on, dude. Give me a clue. Just one hint.

"It's on the way," was all he said as he extended his arm to you.

Okay, then no clue.

"Shall we?"

"We shall."

Of all the places you expected to make a pit stop at, Home Depot was the last thing on your list. Zoro had to pick up a bulb for his kitchen light that has been in his shopping notes for the past two months. Two. months. This is exactly why you make the lists on your grocery runs. He always forgets something.

In one hand you held your new fluffy companion close, while Zoro held onto your free one while you padded through the departments to reach the light section. Like any self-respecting humans, you stopped by the furniture section to look at a few sofas and test their softness together. They were so comfortable to sit on but you already had one in your apartment and from what Zoro let on he had one too many. Now, you wanted to reach final destination sooner.

A bit more waddling around floorings and hardware and you finally reached it - the beauty that was the light section. Bulbs of all kinds for all purposes, orientally decorated lamps and simple to more lavish strings of lights hung around each rack, one calling out more than the other.

The section extended into an extra part that seemed to have been arranged more recently. It called to you so you left Zoro looking for his bulb as you went to explore it more.

Following the multicolor trail bouncing off the racks, you came to a makeshift panel widening into the middle of the department. It was built to look like an arch of some sort. Like the kind you would see in extravagant wedding settings.

Fairy lights and crystal chandeliers of all shapes dripped down to paint the grey floors in a myriad of colours. You ventured under it, looking at all the ambient and decorative designs on display. A few lamps were so beautiful you seriously considered redecorating. Although, the warm golden light of a chandelier in the middle of the ensemble drew you in, its intricate framework sending rays of light reflecting from all lamps everywhere.

Zoro found the bulb he needed and turned around to find you gone from his side. He had to put a tracker on you at this point.

Following his instinct, he took just a few steps down the lights wing and found you right away. His breath hitched. There you were, revelling in the warmth of the light of a crystal chandelier. Its main frame made out of goldenrod supported dozens of glass flowers cascading from each side to create a bigger rozette above. The other lights reflected into the glass, shining a warm gold tone all over you, romanticising your features.

You looked like you stepped out of heaven. A fallen angel. His fallen angel.

You were curiously tracing the details of a crystal flower when he stepped closer to you, musky vanilla invading your senses. Turning to him you ended up nose to nose once again tonight, foreheads almost touching in that confined space. He was so close yet so far again. What was he waiting for?

Kiss me, you wanted to scream.

Kiss my lips dry.

Kiss me like I'm yours Zoro.

You were ready to beg. To have him close the distance faster and end this yearning.

He leaned in, breath ghosting your lips almost painfully.

In your daze, too focused on him finally showing a response, you backed up into a lamp that nearly knocked out everything else behind you. You turned around just in time to catch it, steadying it back to its place, saving dozens of installations from being crushed to bits and pieces. When you turned back around, his eyes closed in denial, letting out an exasperated breath.

And he pulled away. Just like that. He initiated the moment and he ended it too.

Now what the fuck.

"Did you get the bulb?" you exhaled, still in shock that the moment was gone as quick as it came.

"I have," he inhaled, straightening his posture, cocky smirk flying back to his lips.

Like he didn't just have me begging for a fucking kiss in the Home Depot lights section.

"Do you need anything else?"

"Nope," he got a hold of your hand pulling it between you, thumb softly guarding yours. "I have everything I need right here."

You're such an anomaly, Roronoa Zoro.

All you could think about was his place. Which was unexplored land to you. Your visit there wasn't too early of a feat in your relationship considering how much he loved your place. You just pondered on what was waiting for you there.

An open invitation to become more? A private tour of his home? A one night only limited edition Zoro? The possibilities with this man were endless.

A small stinging sensation brought your attention to your leg. Your ankles. Not having worn heels in a while, you didn't think it would be this bad if you left them uncovered and just slid into the heels for the night. Until it was that bad and trying to walk in a way that didn't give your discomfort away was hard. Every step down the concrete sidewalk had your the shoe brush like a bristle comb against your ankle.

You stopped to lean your weight on a fence, lifting your leg to be met with the new blood crescents forming on the ridges of your heels. Ouch. Rubbing your ankles to soothe the ache proved to be only temporary relief. You tried putting it back in the shoe only to scrunch your nose at the new wave of pain.

You've been walking for quite a while already. Who knew how much longer you had until you reached his place?

Before you could even register what was happening, Zoro dropped to his knees in front of you with a grunt. You blinked, bewildered at his behaviour. His wide back stretched, laid out for you. You didn't notice until now that his shirt was slightly see-through, the glory of his lean, strong shoulders fully in your view. No view of the coastline could compare to the one you had in front of you. Kneeling at your feet of all things.

You just stared for a while still confused but digging it, until his voice echoed like a wake up call in your ears.

"Get on."

"I can walk."

He turned his head around, pining you with an are you serious right now look. He was trying to be a gentleman but your hugely independent persona wasn't having any of that. Well, that and you were still mad about the home depot thing.

The kiss that never happened. The pulling away after railing you up all night, with a desperate sigh on his part, as if he felt the same. If he felt the same he would've said or done something to cement it. To make you stop feeling like a damn fool.

"I know you can," he added, voice turning so mellifluous to sweeten the mood that your knees almost turned to jelly. "I just don't want those red demons to scar you more than they already have."

He was sweet-talking you again.

He turned back around and made grabby hands over his shoulder for you to hurry up. You bit your lip annoyed that he was right. The heels would only scar your ankles more.

"Fine," you sighed and got on, closing an arm around his neck as the other wrapped the bear's arms around your own.

Certain that you got comfortable, Zoro got a hold of the back of your thighs to lift you up. The spot he touched behind your thigh tickled and you tried your hardest to keep stable and not move around too much. You did kick forwards in instinct once, earning a disgruntled huff from your humble transport.

"Is there a place you aren't ticklish in?"

"I'm sorry, I just can't help it."

You took a strand of your hair and tickled his cheek on purpose as he tried to blow it away.

"I will drop both of you if you don't stop that," he warned.

You leaned closer to the side of his head, the rim of your lips brushing just the tip of his ear, voice playing sweet whispering in the same way he did to you all night.

"Stop what?"

He stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, jaw clenched, tensing under your hold before slowly reconfiguring his pace. You hit a chord. You grinned in victory that it affected him when your smile fell as you caught sight of the corner of his lip twisting upwards. He welcomed your teasing only to reply with a remark of his own.

"Are you testing me, angel?"

Angel. That was new. So new that your heart fluttered.

You kept your composure unsure of how to respond. This was one of those times his teasing got too deep inside of you and tickled a chord you didn't even know was there. So you just deflected from it, securing your hold on him better.

"Drop me and I will end your entire bloodline."

A deep rumble of a chuckle that he tried to keep inside but failed, boomed under you. The heaviness between you dissipated little by little, unserious, and you giggled along with him.

"You're precious cargo. But I just might," he teased again, readjusting his hold on you.

Yet, the truth was he wouldn't. In fact, he would do anything in his power for you to be comfortable. Even if that meant carrying you and a midsized bear all the way to his place sprawled on his back like a sack of potatoes, with your red feet killers swinging in his hand as your warm giggles filled the night.

Though it was a far reach, the possibility of nights like these becoming a regular thing made his heart soar. Maybe there was a chance for more.

Entering the lush part of the coastline, palm-hidden domains morphed into villas upon villas of the rich and the elite in all kinds of styles running along the lap of a hill. Halfway up the steep hill, your humble transport climbed a set of stairs and stopped in front of a villa.

Your mouth hung open. There's no way this was his.

Your eyebrows reached the heavens when he fished around his pocket for the keys and jingled them in the hole, pushing the door open. This was his.

Once inside, he bent down for you to get off, placing your heels down, putting his own shoes next to yours. You hopped off taking in the place. Each way your head turned you were instantly hit with his scent.

"You're telling me your house was this close to the club and we spent new year's sleeping on the beach?" you asked, twirling around the place.

Walking in further, you came to a dip in the ground going into a spacious living room. Two medium couches and an armchair in a deep forest green laid around facing each other. He does have a couch too many.

"Well, I didn't want to hit third base that early," he said, walking into the kitchen area. "You did take me for a psychopath just for taking you to the beach."

Taken aback at his words, you turned around trying to recall when that happened.

"Pffft, I did not."

Stopping his ascent on a small ladder to change the broken bulb, he placed his hands on his hips and looked back at you then proceeded to utter the exact words you said to him on your first night together.

"Is this the part where you kill me or something?"

He even had the tone right. You laughed remembering his first impression. Oh, how wrong you were. He turned out to be way more than that.

"Fair enough."

Fixing fluffy Lovey on a couch, you walked around some more. The huge space was used so well, beige and green motives spreading all around, combining in neutrals with the dark grey oak wooden floors. Beyond the modern aesthetic and messily discarded trinkets it was so cozy. Compared to your apartment, this place was an oasis.

"You have a really nice house."

"Thank you. It's not much really."

Not much? He's not being real.

He fiddled some more with the lightbulb, lean forearms working to click it into place. Extending his hand to you, he motioned you to the flip switch to test if it works. You obliged and turned it on. The bulb glowed, turning the beige kitchen golden, just like the chandelier you saw.

Moving into the cooking area you realised even his kitchen was something out of the paradise of architectural design.

You leaned your elbows on the marble top, head resting on top of your knuckles, waiting for him to finish. Once he was satisfied with his work, he stored the ladder away and came to sit next to you, mirroring your position. Feeling his prying eyes on you, you turned to find him a few inches away, hip brushing yours, looking at you with a smile.

"Hi," you said softly, smiling back at him.

"Hi," he replied, the crescents around his eyes deepening.

You could sit there looking at each other until time would end. If it wasn't for your stomachs singing in unison demanding some attention.

"I thought that instead of going to spend loads of money on a restaurant, we could cook something ourselves," he suggested.

"You went grocery shopping without me?"

"Yep," he popped the p at the end looking really proud of himself.

You had to give him credit for planning the whole day out ahead of time. It's the most anyone has ever done for you.

"So, what are we cooking?"

"Well," he threw a towel over his shoulder, "your wish is my command tonight."

You loved his determination. Zoro could cook. Just enough to save his life if need be but nothing too grandiose - if that included omelets and fried rice with some creativity to reinvent the dish for every day of the week. Thing that required talent.

So, you thought of one simple thing no one could screw up. Something that would be easy, fun and quick to make that would fill you both. You settled on the pinnacle of good food.

"Then pizza it is."

"Had a feeling you'd say that."

He walked to the fridge and pulled out some of your favorite toppings and a jar of the tomato sauce you swore by. You gasped, holding a hand over your heart in fake excitement.

"You know me so well."

"I try my best," he said, making a bow.

You got to making the dough, mixing the ingredients while he connected his phone to a speaker. Jazzy, romantic music played and you craned your neck at him to see that playful smirk. He wasn't acting like the Zoro you knew.

"Dean Martin? Seriously?"

"What's wrong with it? It's-"

"Romantic."

You never saw anyone cut the music so fast. It gave you whiplash.

"Then what about this?"

The track changed to ABBA's Dancing Queen. You threw your head back with a laugh, shaking it at his questioning music choices.

"Friday night and the lights are low ~," he sang off key, sending you into another fit of giggles. He continued singing as laughter rolled out of you to the point you were holding your stomach in pain.

Cruising around some more, he finally let a pop playlist run in the background as you worked on the dough and he got busy with chopping stuff up. You snuck a few glances at him and stilled - that golden light bounced on his tan complexion, making his focused posture appear so snug and cozy, almost husband material. The amused twinkle was back in his brown orbs, resembling irresistible pralines.

He looked like home.

Feeling your cheeks heat up, you turned back to the dough, sprinkling flour on the table top and rolling it out to spread it as wide as you could eat it. Too focused on it, you didn't notice a floured finger coming to paint your face until the white powder was already smeared across your cheeks.

"You're such a child," you let out before you painted his nose with flour too.

"I think that makes two of us."

He cupped the side of your face, brushing his thumb over the flour covered bits. Though that only smudged the flour more, your heart beat accelerated to an uneven rate. He was too close again. Too close to let go again.

"You made me beg for this date so much," he spoke lowly, brushing your cheek in circles. "I don't do begging."

"Can't blame a girl for wanting to torment the guy she's interested in."

Before he could reply, your stomach grumbled again, annoyed that there was still no food present in it. His hand fell from your cheek, though his touch still lingered. Warm, singed, stamped on your cheek.

You finished decorating the pizza with everything you both liked and once it was in the oven, you crouched down to see it cook. Zoro followed on your side, knee touching yours.

"You know, it's not gonna cook faster if you stare at it," he mused.

"I know," you turned to look at him. The gleam from the oven light coupled with the kitchen light above played tricks on you because you could've sworn that hard, playful gaze of his turned softer. "I'm just surprised you can cook something other than basic military canned food."

"Oh, shut up," he laughed, playfully shoving his shoulder into yours.

You made small talk until the oven dinged that your pizza was ready. Letting Zoro deal with it, you ventured more into his living room like a cat looking for her next napping spot.

You walked all the way to the glass windows acting like an outer wall. Finding a handle, you pulled on it expecting it to be just for décor only to see that the glass slid open to give you access to a private beach front. Your jaw would crack if this man shocked you more tonight.

He has a private beach. Who the hell just has a private beach? And he said it's not much. Dude, I can move here if you don't like it.

Pushing the door open all the way, you took a seat on an extended wooden ledge overlooking the stretch of water you started liking so much. The sky was still cloudy, covering up the moon, yet some stars still sparkled through the white glare. A few birds played around in the trees, chirping as brightly as they would in the early morning. Waves lapped calmly at the shore, smaller than the naked eye could see, crashing into each other before they could make a sound on the sand.

You closed your eyes and took a deep breath of the salty air, letting it sink deep into your lungs. Calm enveloped you like a warm blanket comfortingly there for you. It was more than an oasis. It was how Zoro made you feel. Though most times it was accompanied by chaos, you would always find yourself waiting for this serene peace.

"I see you've found your favorite spot already."

Zoro was quickly at your side with the pizza sliced, a bottle of wine under his arm and some glasses. He sat down next to you working on the bottle before anything else.

"Favorite doesn't even begin to describe it."

Hungry from all the dancing and walking, you dove into the pizza first. The dough melted on your tongue, nodding to yourself as the good tomato sauce hit your taste buds, among with all the other toppings.

"Is it edible enough?"

"It turned out way better than I expected."

"Hand me one," he opened his mouth, waiting for you to feed him a slice.

You picked up a smaller one. Careful not to smudge any of the toppings on his shirt, you held it out for him to take a bite. He stopped fiddling with the cork to take in the taste.

"You're right, this is heavenly. I didn't know my oven could cook like this."

You choked, slapping his arm.

"That's what ovens are for, dummy."

Red wine, darker than your dress, danced in the glasses as you clinked them together. Taking a sip, the sweetness hit you before it lulled into bitter cherries, spilling on your lips like the promise of love on this chilly February night.

"Look out," he pointed out towards the sea.

You looked everywhere. All you could see was a few boats out on the water, the sky clearing some more and the sea. You even squinted, thinking you weren't looking properly.

"I don't see anything."

He checked his watch to see he was too early. For someone who was always late in making decisions, he still had time. Huh, how the tables have turned.

He counted the leftover seconds in his head, leaning back to look at you the way he did on new year's on the beach. Your back was in his full view, covered by your dress and your hair that grew a bit longer. He still has that impulse to trace your spine with the pads of his fingers.

"Look now."

Right as your eyes fixed on the boats, fireworks lit up the night sky from far out on the water. Pink and red spun around in different shaped hearts.

Seems like the surprises keep on coming.

Too engrossed in the light show decorating the sky in cute and heartwarming messages, you didn't notice Zoro slipped from beside you until you heard slow music playing from the speakers. He sat behind you, hand extended your way.

"Can I have this dance?"

"Another one?"

"You can't blame me for wanting another dance with you when you look this beautiful tonight."

"Only tonight?" you questioned, raising an eyebrow in suspicion.

"All the time," he corrected himself as he pulled you closer.

You stepped left and right under the warmth of the lights and the fireworks, holding the man you've always wanted in your life. Suddenly, you were taken back to that night where you let it all go to have fun with a stranger. A stranger that became something more so fast.

Who knew you'd end up mending each other's solitude and fill up the cracking pieces in your hearts. You were both aware that you meant more to each other than you let on, but the words just didn't seem to find their way out to communicate that. That was your only fatal flaw.

The need to know where you stand was more powerful than anything right now.

Somehow, everything was perfect.

Maybe too perfect.

"This is so fucking cheesy," you quipped.

"What's cheesy?"

"Everything. This night, the food, the wine, the fireworks... you."

You've kept the uneasiness at bay all night but something made it explode everywhere in your body and it definitely wasn't the wine. Or the way he was looking at you with those deep brown eyes like he could tell what you were feeling. If that were true he wouldn't waste any more time than you already did.

"What is this really about?" he asked, hands falling from your waist to rub comforting circles on the inside of your wrists.

If it wasn't crystal clear until now, he knew what made you tick. And something pushed a nerve by the looks of it and the way you were avoiding his eyes.

You wanted the ground to swallow you up for letting your mouth run wild without any basis besides that nervousness. But you might as well just bite the bullet and tell him everything and be honest with each other at least for once. You avoided talking about it way too long.

"It all feels a little too perfect to be real."

Thinking that voicing your thoughts out would give you some semblance of balance was a wrong assumption. As soon as those words left your mouth, he let go of your arms, taking a step back. Once again, you let your inhibitions take over and reel you away from a great thing.

You got lucky by meeting him. But you still couldn't help but think his heart wasn't yours for the taking. Because he wouldn't let you take it. That you couldn't be more than friends with him because more would destroy the already amazing thing you had going on.

By the way his face fell, brown orbs more preoccupied with the wooden floors, you realized you probably fucked up even more.

Frankly, he did all this tonight for you. He was never the type to go out of his way for people, even the ones he had an interest in because he wasn't one to play the feelings game. To chase and court and shower in affection.

But he knew where you were coming from and why.

He didn't make it clear that you've been the sole object of his attention ever since he saw you that first night you came to the club. For him, that was just another night lost to endless glasses of alcohol to numb himself even more from the world.

Until you showed up.

Hair thrown into the same messy bun you always sported, uncomfortably shifting in your clothes as you nursed a different array of alcohol yourself, trying to do exactly the same thing he was doing. Numbing the feelings away. Keeping them at bay. Fighting them with everything you had in opposite corners of the club when you could've embraced them together from that first look that connected you.

The more time he spent with you the more he let those suppressed feelings in and realised that they didn't bring him any pain this time, but solace, comfort, hope.

The hope that he might just have a great thing in front of him worth changing his ways for.

While Zoro was having a revelation, you were having a war with yourself.

There was this monstrous fire harbored inside of you for so long. Zoro woke that fire and there was no telling of the destruction it could cause this time, especially with so many unsaid things lingering in the air. So many unshared feelings. Because he stood still like the sea washing on the beach instead of doing something. Anything.

Please, Zoro, your eyes begged but he wouldn't look at you.

He was danger, screamed your mind. The danger that you got too comfortable. That this was wrong and you put up the 'no vacancy' sign on the doors to your heart way too soon.

Let me in, your heart screamed, blood in your veins trembling in anger.

One rapid thump of your heartbeat drowned in the silence.

Two more passed and he stood still, gaze set on the ground.

On the third one, you made your mind up.

Before tears could well up in your eyes, you turned around with the intention of bolting out through the same door he carried you through not that long ago.

Sensing movement, he caught sight of you shaking your head, that pout he hated back on your lips. He hurt you. Because he was a fucking idiot who couldn't do words.

But he could do actions. He was willing to do even more to prove to you that this was right and it wasn't all just in your head. That he felt it too.

It only took you taking two fast strides in the direction of the door for him to make up his mind too.

"Then let me make it real," he caught your hand and pulled you to him, crashing his lips onto yours for the first time since that night at the club, kissing you like his life depended on your very own lips moulding to his own.

You felt the desperation, the anguish, the need. All of it to have you close and to feel you in more ways than one. Everything you've been feeling for the past month, hope, passion, the beginning of love, spilling from his lips onto yours. He was telling you everything he kept to himself with each desperate tug at your lip and you received every word.

The last time he kissed you was over a month ago, pressured by the new year's kiss tradition. Back then, he tasted like alcohol and his cologne. But now, he tasted like everything you've been waiting for. And you had a hunch he waited just as long for it.

Once you were past the shock of it, you kissed him back even harder, lips finally moving in sync with his. He got a rough hold of your waist and pulled you even closer to deepen the kiss. One of his hands tangled in your curls exactly the way he wanted to since he saw you at your apartment.

He wanted to be selfish. Let that monstrosity of his heart pour out all of those feelings to you. But he reminded himself he had to take it slow with you. So he let go with a small tug at your lower lip, spurring the eagerness inside of your tummy for more.

You pulled apart but remained close, foreheads touching in bliss. Though short, this kiss was sweeter and more meaningful than any chocolate box you could ever get. It was everything you needed to know what his heart held inside and how much more of him you still had to see.

He let you in.

"I wanted to do this for so long," he breathed haggardly, like you stole away all the air in his lungs with just one kiss. A kiss that was so long overdue.

"Why didn't you?" you voiced the question that's been hanging by a thread all night.

"I didn't know how you felt about me."

"You're such an idiot. But you're my idiot."

Shaking your head against his, you pulled him closer by the collar of his shirt and kissed him again, this time with more fervour. You wanted to make sure he understood where your feelings stood, where you wanted this to go and that you let him be in total control of it. Because losing control with Zoro was surrendering to a higher power. One that your heart loved being handled by.

You carved your own feelings into the way you held onto his cheeks and nibbled on his lips in unsated hunger, trying to put the torment, want and devotion you felt for him over the past month and a half into a language that he could understand.

And he understood.

Tapping your thigh, you got the message and jumped up into his strong arms that wrapped around you like a curtain of safety.

Your safety net.

He ripped yours apart to become it.

He held you to him so easily as he navigated through the furniture maze in his living room, taking off into a long corridor, all the while his lips discovered new grounds with yours. He didn't want to waste any more time if it involved you.

Zoro didn't care if this would end up being a fucked up disaster on his part, but he held back enough from showing you how he really feels. It was time he made things right with you.

You.

It was only you.

There didn't need to be anyone else for him.

Just you.

His hold tightened around you as he rounded a corner, not for security but to brand the feel of your being in his hands, to realize that he was finally holding you, feeling you where you were supposed to be all along.

Heavens, how much he longed for this. Your presence wouldn't dare to leave his thoughts just like he never left yours. Oh, he knew of the ardor your eyes held inside and was well aware of what ran around in your head because he let those same movies play in his own around the clock, early day into late night. Maybe he didn't let it be known, not like you did in wistful glances or pink tinted cheeks, but there were signs.

In the way his jaw ticked in disgust at every man who set their eyes on you every time you went out shopping, to the point he was ready to have an MME match if they stared too long. Or how his hand twitched to grab yours whenever you sat too close, the need to lace them together and press you flat against the couch in your apartment overriding his senses. And his mouth. Oh, his mouth. It wanted nothing but to taste every inch of you, everywhere you touched him and riled him up, every time your eyes drifted down to his lips, until there was nothing left to taste.

Hell would freeze over before that happened.

Kicking the door to his room open, he shut it just as swiftly, maneuvering your back to the nearest wall, moonlight the only thing illuminating the room. The cold wall cooled your burning skin, a breathy gasp leaving your throat right into his mouth with a kiss. He let go of your back, hands searching for your palms, pushing them against the wall beside your head. His mouth never left yours, exploring every depth, rise and sigh escaping you.

He hooked you higher up the wall with every kiss, atoning for every missed opportunity over the past month. Your legs tangled harsher around his torso, tugging him even closer as he pressed against you with all his might, feeling all of him and none of him at the same time.

Close just wasn't enough for any of you.

You needed closer. Attached. Intimate.

Soul on soul.

Patience wasn't your virtue at all tonight. You clawed at his hands, needy unlike anyone has ever made you. Except Zoro. Your head was filled with him. You were breathing him in and it still wasn't enough.

In one breath you were unglued from the cold wall and put down on the comfy edge of his bed, separated from his lips and from him. You whined at the loss of feeling him against you, ready to argue that having him kiss you mattered more than whatever had him lose the tempo. Although that need turned into anticipation just as fast once your eyes focused on his kneeling form before you.

Roronoa Zoro, on his knees, for you, eyes darker than the blackness of the night. That vulnerability looked lethal.

Those eyes. You could drown in them for a lifetime if they asked you to.

"Zoro," you sighed, chest rising up and down, expectant of his next move.

Oh, how he loved the sound of his name rolling off your lips. Usually so contained in the form of a sarcastic remark or to warn him to watch it.

Now, it was tuned to demand for his attention. And he wanted to make sure you got all of it.

One of his hands extended to your leg, calloused fingers trailing up the arch, circling mindfully around your wounded heel to hold it up to his lips. He pressed them to the inside of your ankle, slow and steady, eyes fixed on yours as you took in a sharp breath. The intensity of his unwavering gaze alone made heat pool between your legs.

Flutters rose in crescendos inside your belly at each kiss and there was no stopping them from roaming free. Not when he was watching your every response like your body was the eighth wonder of the world.

Your hands fell beside you, feeling the softness of his duvet to ground you as you closed your eyes to relish in the moment. Focusing on how plush his mouth felt on your skin on two different extremities. Wondering how they would feel on the rest of your body.

Unspoken but present in the air, that wish was his command.

His fingers trailed higher, past your calf, under your knee, roughly tugging you closer to the edge. Your dress bunched up your thighs as his fingers continued their perusal to reach the small of your back. Slowing his pace, he traced the dip in your spine all the way between your shoulder blades, your back arching involuntarily. Still on his knees, he moved closer between your legs as those fingers circled on your nape, pulling you down to meet his mouth halfway in another kiss, more fiery than the last.

This one sputtered with flames of passion. So much that you couldn't contain yourself anymore.

Your hands shot out to undo the buttons of his shirt. Frustrated with the top ones you just dug your fingers in the holes and pulled it open, poor buttons flying to the floor with a pang, interrupting your fast breaths. He broke apart from your lips to assess the damage only to find his chest half-exposed to your itching hands.

"That was vintage."

"I'll get you another one but I want it off, now," you muttered in a breath, grabbing his face to devour him. You couldn't get enough of how he tasted and every breath for air asked for another taste.

Hooking one hand around your back, he lifted you up and hauled you to the middle of the bed. His lips connected with the side of your mouth, dragging the bottom lip you liked biting so much between his teeth. He was just as annoyed at your dress, desperately looking for ways to feel more of you as he fisted the ends until they creased.

"I want this off too," he groaned, pulling on the skirt impatiently.

Said and done.

You sat up, letting the straps fall off your shoulders, pulling the material over your head to leave you in your undergarments. He licked his lips taking you in. The ferocity of his stare alone drinking you in like his normal glass of whiskey made tremors dance on your skin.

And he didn't even properly touch you yet. You weren't even sure you would survive his touch. The good thing was, you were about to find out.

"What now, loverboy?"

The nickname came out way more playful than you intended it to. It was enough to provoke him in ways that will damage you for anyone else. Ways that will tie his existence to your very own, unable to ever untie it.

"I'm gonna have you like no one has ever dared to before and no one will," he spoke, so deep that your buds prickled against the air at the gravel in his voice. "By the time I'm done with you, you're gonna wish you didn't test my patience for so long."

That turned you on even more. At the need present in him matching the same level of want flowing in your body.

He kicked the rest of his clothes off. Your eyes stopped at the huge package that laid under his clothes, a Greek god in the flesh and balls. They then lingered from the sculpted thighs you were so envious of, to his defined middle where you lost count of his packs and chest, going up to the arched bow of his collar bones, stopping at the plump lips that rushed to capture your own again. This time, he bit your lower lip for access to explore the rest of your mouth, tongues tangling in a dance of their own on the same rapid rhythm your hearts were beating in.

A hand sneaked under your back to lift you higher, pressing your chest flush to his, feeling all the shapes of his muscles against your own. His lungs breathed with yours. Your hearts came alive.

His lips left your mouth, moving down your jaw, prodding under it, heading to your collar bones in hungry fire. They left a burning trail in their wake, stretching tingles even to the edge of your shoulders where he pressed softer ones.

Kiss, lick and bite was his mantra that he repeated against your skin. He wanted to claim you tonight, more viciously than a wolf in heat would claim his mate.

Trailing down, he laid small and large kisses on your sternum, between your mounds. His palms sat on either side of your waist, rubbing circles to tease you more. Damn his teasing.

Feeling his lips, his hands and his torso pressed to you all at once turned your breathing erratic, saprking electric shocks inside of you. He was everywhere, taking your control away. Your eyes darted closed to find some kind of anchor besides fisting his sheets.

"Eyes on me, angel," he commanded and in a second your eyes snapped back to his.

He stopped just above your navel, waiting for you to catch your breath. That was a luxury. Once he was sure you were following, he continued all the way down to your lower stomach where the band of your panties stuck to you uncomfortably. Your breath hitched when he stopped there, blowing above where you needed him most, only to move down to your inner thighs, nipping on the softer skin with that amused smirk of his gracing the outline of his mouth.

He was trying to push you over the edge on purpose.

Fuck that.

One swift push and he fell backwards on the bed. You climbed on top to take the reigns and gain some control back. Little did you know that having you straddling him like that bid the beast inside of him alive.

You moved butterfly kisses from the crook of his neck, down his toned pecs. His hand latched in your hair, grabbing a tight hold around your curls, destroying them like he wanted to do all night. The pressure on your scalp pulled a moan from you just as you bit into his abdomen heaving a groan from him, his other hand digging into your waist as he raised up to meet your neck. He bit and pulled on it too, turning your insides to mush.

Sitting up with you on your kness, he hooked a finger on each side of your panties and ripped them apart down the middle with that shit-eating grin. You choked on every remnant of sanity as he threw the shreds to the side leaving you naked, fully naked, exactly like he wanted you.

Grabbing onto his shoulders, you moved to his lap, legs parted to cage him into your space. One look of confirmation that this was still what you both wanted had you sink down on him at once.

He was big. Collosal almost. He felt bigger than you thought you could take. Eyes closed, it took you a moment to get your bearings back but once you did, you felt him everywhere. His upper thighs supported the rest of your weight. His hands circled around you, both grabbing and holding you upright. His cherry wine-infused breath fanned the side of your neck.

And his eyes? Waiting for you as you opened yours. One look at them and your hips started rolling on autopilot. Every swing buried him deeper, further, closer to where your being called for him. And he let you have it. Letting you ravish his gear the way you liked it, feeling him stretch you sore.

His mouth went back to his mantra. Kissing the crook of your neck, licking it right in the middle and biting it hard enough to leave a bruise. To mark you as his. His and his only.

You gripped his shoulders, shifting to get a better position as your hips started getting tired. Silently, you cursed yourself for ditching gym with him because you didn't know how much stamina riding him would take out of you.

You were close and from how he gripped your waist to help your rhythm, pulling them faster front and back, he was too. He stopped nibbling on your neck, moving to your lips to swallow your quiet moans. He had to make them louder.

You rolled your hips until you couldn't find the energy to push into him anymore. He took that as his chance to take over again.

He pulled out, turning you around as he spread you on all fours. Your hands landed on the bedpost to support you as he climbed behind you. He laid kisses from your lower back all the way to your left shoulder where his lips brushed your ear just as his tip lightly caressed your opening. His warm breaths foreshadowed sin on your skin, making you wetter by the second.

And he entered you. One, two, three pumps and he got accustomed to your tightness just as you did with his size stretching you out. He bit the side of your neck with every thrust, sending your conscious into oblivion, chasing that high together.

Every moan you withheld from him earned you a deeper thrust. He wanted to hear you in all your glory. Wanted to know how badly you wanted him, not just like this but in every way.

In your lost haze, you ended up on your back closer to release. Entering you roughly, he pounded in you so fast you were seeing stars, head rolling to the side in complete ecstasy. His hand grabbed your jaw, tilting your field of vision back to him.

His free hand grabbed your hand for the millionth time tonight, placing it on the messy sheet beside your head, fingers smoothly sliding through yours as he kissed away all of your sighs. Your other hand climbed from deep down his waist to his upper back, hard rock muscles rippling under your touch like a stone thrown on the surface of a still river, disturbing its peace, turning it turbulent and wild. Waking up every primal urge in him as he groaned in your neck.

He accelerated, twitching inside of you and you came, letting your insides explode into a mess as he continued chasing his own high. He wasn't done with you yet, thumb rushing to rub another climax out of you as he was close to his own. His mouth bit into your breasts, grazing your buds one at a time, pulling on them in a way that added to your pleasure way more than the last one.

You gripped him again, tighter, and in no time you both came furiously, spilling everything you held back out onto that mattress. He pulled out, letting his seed fly onto your stomach.

You tried to catch your breath. It was gone somewhere between ecstasy and what laid beyond euphoria. He left to clean himself up, returning with a token of aftercare for you. He wiped his mess off of you, gentle and attentive to get everything off. Once he was done, he got in next to you, pulling you close.

You both just sat there for a while, reflecting on everything that happened. You still felt him inside of you, on you, above you, behind you. He managed to ruin you.

His voice cleared the quiet, making you focus back on the real world for a bit.

"You okay?"

"I just got fucked to oblivion. I would say fantastic but I can't feel my legs."

He chuckled. He would never fail to love your sarcasm. Even in moments like these.

"Did I go too hard?" he asked, not sarcastically but wanting to know if it was too much. If he went harder than he should have.

Looking at the vines of love bites he left on the entirety of your neck, the smudged makeup that looked almost natural, and your tousled messy hair, hard couldn't encapsulate it better. You would've said "you could've gone harder" but that meant urging him on another round and you were spent for tonight. So, you laid your head in the crook of his neck and closed your eyes, releasing a content breath, a silent confirmation that you were okay.

A single thought passed through your head - this was all kinds of right. Your once in a lifetime right time right place, as cheesy as it sounded. Maybe cheesy was good.

He was in his head thinking everything through in his own way, breaking down the once intense feelings into little flurries of emotion buzzing inside of him. That passion masked itself as denial for way too long. But tonight, you held his face and took that mask off, giving him clarity and he was able to feel something else.

Something close to love, he thought, chuckling to himself.

You cracked one eye open, taken aback at his sudden cheerfulness. One look at his face bathed in the glow of the moon and you saw him beaming.

"What are you so smiley about?"

He just shook his head, smile widening like a Cheshire cat that's been caught up to no good.

"Nothing."

Taking it upon yourself, you got up from his side with slow moves and straddled his waist, getting his attention back on you.

"Tell meeeee," you stretched, poking your fingers through every dent in his abs until he told you.

"What are you gonna do for it?"

Not this again.

Actually, this time, you knew what he wanted. A kiss. So, you just leaned over and caught his lips sweetly, smiling into it. His hand came to cup your face, smiling back. He pulled away, soft praline orbs gazing at you warmly.

"What if I still don't want to tell you?"

"Zoro, stop playing with me," you complained, slapping his chest.

"Okay. Okay," he held his hands up in surrender.

He sat up to lean on the headboard and get a better look at you - his ruined shirt hugged your smaller form, running all the way to your thighs. The marks of his feelings that he still couldn't utter decorated you everywhere. You sat back on his lap, arms crossed on your chest, waiting for him to speak.

"I'm not one to do feelings," he started, eyes darting down in thinking. "But you changed that."

Your eyes stayed focused on him, softening at his words.

You knew that he was a reserved person, keeping to his corner rather than reaching out into other people's. Until he found something worth thrusting his hand out at full speed to get it. Something worth hanging onto with his teeth.

As he connected his eyes with yours, brown blazing fire burning as bright and consuming as yours, it dawned upon you that something was you.

He was trying. For you.

"You were right. I am an idiot," he paused, fiddling with the ends of his shirt beside your calf. "It took me so long to figure it out but now I know."

Your heart started running when his hand held yours and brought it to sit on top of his own, running just as fast in his chest. Though the rate of yours spiraled out of control at the honesty of his incoming confession.

"I think I'm in love with you."

Your head spun, blinking in confusion at him.

"Am I hallucinating or did you just say the L word?"

"Yes. I did just say the L word," he nodded, confirming that he felt the same for you.

Before you could breathe it through, you leaned in for another kiss. He deepened the kiss trying to reach every corner of you. Wanting to both take his time and rushing to taste every part of you.

Breathless. Serene. And everything in between.

"I take it you love me back?" he asked, needing you to say those words back to him.

Your heart did flips at the way the word sounded coming from him. It dripped with honey and warmth.

"A little more than love," you grinned. "You do realise that I won't be able to stop it, right?"

"I don't want you to."

"Great," you clapped your hands together. "Because I will become so annoying."

He howled a laugh, throwing his head back, the sound you loved so much making you laugh too.

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

You leaned down connecting your lips for the millionth time tonight. But you still couldn't get used to them or to the fact that your heart called out his name and his answered back calling out just as loud.

Falling forward into his arms, you sank like a ship happily waiting to meet its end in the depths of the ocean that was him. Because no ocean was deeper and so familiar to swim through than your Zoro.

He kissed the crown of your head, pulling you closer. Happy felt like an impossible destination until he held you to him like this, safe and warm in his embrace. He felt a tinge of it and he wanted more.

"Are you tired-"

Before the question even left his mouth properly, his eyes drifted to the steady rise and fall of your chest, drained body curled into him tightly, head tucked into the crook of his neck, chest pressed to his.

She's drooling again, he chuckled to himself, moving some hair away from your face so you wouldn't inhale it. You sat like a baby coddled in its mother's arms, but your position looked a little uncomfortable.

He pulled your feet from under you to get you in a better posture. Moving his arms around you, he got more cozy, drawing the covers over the both of you and let the night come to an end.

Birds chirped announcing a new day, with the sea singing the same tune as its waves crashed in a swirl outside. The morning sun peaked through the curtains, its soft rays caressing the top of your head, willing you to wake up.

The first thing you felt was your cheek pressed against something plush. A pillow. The pillows I fell asleep on last night were way better.

You rolled around the bed trying to find some more sleep when the thought of last night sparked your brain like the tip of a vinyl record player, making memories play faster than your sleepy mind could catch up to.

Lips kissing on every part of your skin available to sight, carving themselves on the hidden ones. Hands caressing your body like a holy prayer, thought but never uttered. Eyes making secret promises with yours in the darkened moonlight.

You turned on your back and opened your eyes, letting them adjust to the light in the room. The fluffy duvet fell to your lap as you sat up, stretching your sore limbs with a groan. Everything ached but in a good way.

Pulling the covers away, you folded them neatly on the bed and took in the space in the light of day. The beige and green from downstairs broke off into a two-tone sandy beige and a cotton white on the floor and the walls. It truly felt like home. And smelt like it too. That musky vanilla you liked so much enveloping you, mostly from his shirt.

After a steamy shower that your skin welcomed fully, you stopped in front of the mirror to see just what he drew on you last night. You traced the red marks down your body, feeling the ghost of his lips like he was kissing and biting those places again and again. He didn't need any words after all.

Rummaging through his wardrobe, you stole a t-shirt, fitting like a dress on you, and a pair of pants that barely wanted to stay on your waist. You had to roll them up and double tie the strings for them to sit still.

Taking to the long corridor, you followed the sunlit path and looked for your partner in crime. You found him in the kitchen, handling an egg carton, preparing for what looked like the Zoro Special - omelete with a bunch of side dishes and orange juice - or Champions' Breakfast as he called it.

He had his back turned to you, busy chopping up some tomatoes. You sneaked behind him, trying to be quick and silent on your feet, planning to jump him. You rounded the marble top of the island, grinning that stealth was on your side, only to get caught between his arms. He already sensed you from when you entered the kitchen so your surprise attack was doomed from the start.

Unpredictable like a breeze of the wind, he picked you up, placing you on the island as strong arms planted on each side, caging you in his space. He took one look at you, recognizing his clothes draped loosely on you, messy bun on top of your head and his heart did flips again.

"Fancy seeing you here," you said, shying away from his gaze. It looked hungry and not for any damn food.

"I could say the same," he spoke, raspy voice sending tingles down your spine. He studied you some more, lips perking up in amusement. "Trying to sneak up on me?"

"Maybeeeee," you played with the hem of his shirt. "What are you making?"

"My special-"

His words got caught in his throat as you laid your chin on the crown of his chest and looked up at him with the softest eyes he's ever seen, all his resolve crumbling to the depths of the fucking universe.

It was truly a wonder to him - how you could go from one extreme to the other, being both adorable and sexy at the same time.

"Can I be your special?" you asked, voice sweeter than candy.

"I wouldn't mind that," he smirked, leaning down to capture your lips in a slow morning peck quicker than you would've liked it to be.

As if on cue, your stomach made a noise of complaint that the pizza you made together last night got digested.

"Let's get some food in you," he said, patting it tenderly.

"Do I get to assist on the special?"

"You get to watch the special," he rubbed his hands together and got started.

Pre-heating a pan on the hob, he held a knife in one hand and an egg in the other. Your eyebrow lifted up in curiosity as he held the knife horizontally to put the egg on top of it, balancing it side to side. With a confident grin your way, he flicked the handle and launched the egg in the air swiftly turning the knife sharp-edge upwards, just in time to catch the egg right in the middle, separating its contents from the cracked shell successfully. The egg sizzled in the pan while your mouth sat agape, shook at the skills he was pulling.

"You really are the gift that keeps on giving."

"So I've been told," he said cockily, flicking imaginary dust off his shoulder. You hopped off the island and elbowed him playfully, settling beside him to watch the magic omelet take shape.

Once enough eggs were cooked, he arranged the plates. He cleaned up his working space and leaned in for a kiss you dodged on purpose. That brought an ambush of kisses on your face, from your forehead to your cheeks, your eyes, your nose, your jaw and your lips. Everywhere he wanted to leave his affection on you.

You managed to shimmy out of his grip and bolted out in the living room, through the open glass door on the beach. The wind blew cold, waking you up like coffee, making your heart thunder. He followed right behind you just like the night you met, leaving your footprints in the sand. Though this time he caught up to you way quicker, whisking you up in the air and spinning you until your stomach hurt from laughing.

The sound of your laugh filled his ears in the most beautiful way possible. And something else clicked in his head. He wanted that to be the first thing he heard every morning, every day, until you got sick of him.

He placed your feet back on the sand and brought you closer, waves crashing next to you like the beat of his heart. He had to give it a shot no matter what. So, without letting any other thoughts cloud his decision, he just asked.

"Do you want to move in with me?"

OH, boy.

Thank you for reading :)

[mebeindelulu]

He calls you clingy - Im Changkyun

bf! Changkyun x fem! reader . a little bit of angst, fluff .

After a whole day spent at the university, finally you could meet your boyfriend Changkyun. So you picked up the take out and rushed to the studio where he was working on his new album.

When you arrived, the door was slightly opened so you quickly noticed that two people were talking inside.

"Uh... I can't go with you bro. Yn will be here in a minute. We spent littleraly the whole day yesterday but she can't live without me." You heard him ironically laughing, "I love her but Jesus... She is so clingy sometimes that it is annoying".

You were so so confused. You've never heard something like that from Changkyun. Yesterday you both had really a good time from coffee date, cooking dinner together to watching your favourite movies and walking around the Han river at night. And the whole idea about spending almost the whole day together was his idea, so hearing that you are "clingy" and that he has enough of you really got the worst insecurities out of you. Tears started to form in your eyes as you turned around and stormed out of the building.

In the bus you texted Changkyun that something in the university came up and you have to stay longer so you won't come to the studio today. When you arrived at your tini apartment you decided to drink the sadness away with wine.

To give Changkyun more space that he "needed", you thought that it will be a good idea to not text with him too much and to not meet with him as well this week. And the word part was that it looked like he is totally fine with that.

After one day that you declined his phone call saying that you have classes, he didn't call you anymore. And after two days instead of replaying to his "Good morning baby, how are you?" as you usually did sending him selfie or describing your day by the voice message, you only replayed "good, I'm just bussy" and he stopped to text you first. So you both were barely texting at all.

After a week of going to university and spending all your free time sitting alone in the apartment, your best friend could tell that there is something that is bothering you, so she told you to get ready because you are going to a party Friday night.

At the party you drink a few drinks and had fun dancing with your friends. You need that kind of distraction from overthinking your relationship and crying every night because your biggest fears came true: he got bored of you. At least that was what you thought.

One of your friends took photo of your group on the dance floor and posted on Instagram with caption "the single ladies", which could get interpreted wrong. Most of the girls in your group were not single. But the song that was played at the time when you were dancing was Beyonce's "Single Ladies" and that's why she added that caption. It had nothing to do with if you are taken or not.

When you were at the party, Changkyun was working at the studio, just like for the last couple weeks, working on his album. And he even wouldn't know that you are at the club if not his friend sent him a screenshot of your friend's "Single Ladies" post.

He suddenly got jealous and betrayed. You said that you will study all night and that's why you can't meet with him, when he asked if you want to spend the evening with him. It hurt him that you avoided him last week, but also he tried to understand you since you were studying so hard for the exams that are coming next week.

He couldn't understand why you didn't even texted him anymore like you used to. A single selfie and "good morning jiagi" would be enough for him. But there was only silence for the past week. And when he texted first you gave him only short replies.

But also deep down he knew that sometimes you need some time alone to isolate yourself from others and be alone with your own thoughts. And he thought that after isolating yourself from people you will come back to normal life and spend a lot of time with him.

But after seeing that you are at the club instead of being with him, he thought that something must be wrong. So he decided that it's enough. Changkyun put on his coat, took his car keys and rushed to the club that you were in (thankfully your friend added a location to her post).

You was standing by the bar with a drink in your hand when some tall guy joined you.

"Hi, what are you doing here?... Alone?"

You could tell that he is handsome, but weren't interested. Your friends were dancing on the dance floor but you were not in the mood to join them do you stayed here, drinking. But you didn't wanted to give such a classy answer so you decided to be a little bit cocky since you had nothing to do.

"And why are you asking, hmm?" He laughed at your question and tried to lean closer to you. But you took a step back. It was too much for you.

"Because a beautiful women like you shouldnt be alone in a place like that." He said putting his hand on your hips, which you immediately shaked off.

And at this moment someone pushed the man away. It was Changkyun. "Don't come close to her, she's mine. Understand?" You could see his jaw clenching.

"Okay, okay. Got it. Chill man." The guy said laughing and walking away.

You were happy that he was here but at the same time you were confused how he knew where you've been.

"Changkyun? What are you doing here?"

"I should ask you the same question!!!" He yelled at you. "What was that? Who was this guy?" He was really mad. And you didn't like that he yelled at you like that... especially when you didn't do anything wrong.

He was angry seeing some guy that close to you, especially that lately you distanced yourself from him.

You suddenly become anxious, tears forming in your eyes, you lowered your head down. When Changkyun saw that you become tense, he shook his head and sadness took over his anger. He hated seeing you crying. And he knew that you really badly endure if someone is yelling at you.

"It's okay, I'm sorry. I didn't wanted to yell at you. I'm sorry." His voice soften as he took a step forward and took your hands in his. You relaxed by his touch.

"Let's go home, Okay?" You nodded your head to his question.

"But first I have to tell girls that I'm leaving" and as you said you quickly swiped of tears and went to the dance floor where girls were dancing and said that you are leaving with your boyfriend. Of course they wanted you to stay and tried to hold you but Changkyun intervened and they let you go.

You were driving in silence for the most of the ride. And it wasn't a comfortable silence. You both could feel the tension.

"Sooo you still didn't answer my question. What you were doing at the party? I thought that you were studying tonight." He asked looking at the road and avoiding an eye contact. You felt so terrible. You didn't want to lie to your boyfriend but you still was sad that he thought that you are clingy. And studying was an excuse to not to spend time with him and give him space. But right now you started to have doubts about it.

"I was but Mia decided that they can't leave me alone so I had to go with them." You answered mirroring Kyuns behaviour, looking ahead on the road.

"Oh, so you have time to go out to drink but you don't have time to give me at least one call, huh?" You could feel that he was hurt. But so you were too.

"I thought that I'm a burden to you so I decided to give you space..." You put your head low and started to play with your fingers.

At that time you arrived at your apartment parking.

"What? I've never said anything like that. Where did you get this from?" Finally he turned to look at you.

"But you did say something like that. About a week ago, when I came to the studio the door to your room was open and I've heard you complaining about me to Soobin. You said that you have enough of spending a lot of time with me and that I'm clingy. So I decided not to come in and instead I went home." Holding his both hands on the wheel he listened to you carefully as you quietly explained your point of view.

"I don't even know what to say right now YN." he looked at you with mixed emotions. You couldn't say if he is angry, sad or just disappointed. "Then don't say anything" that proved that he didn't care about you so you wanted to get out of the car as quick as possible but his hand on your shoulder stopped you.

"Don't. Please. I'm sorry, listen..." When you looked at him with teary eyes he thought that his heart stopped. It really hurt you what he said a week ago. Changkyun took your hand and hold in his both hands.

"Yn, baby. I didn't want to say that. I didn't mean that, really." He hold your chin and put it up so you were looking at him. "I love you and I love spending time with you, please believe me." A tear went down your face and he swiped it with his thumb.

"I just had a hard day. We are finishing my album and everything is just stressing me out. I know that it is not an excuse but I seriously had no idea why I said that, I'm sorry."

"Can I hug you?" You asked shyly and Kyun immediately hugged you caressing slowly his hand on your back and the other hand patting gently your head.

"If I ever say something like that again just punch me in the face" He said, which make you laugh.

"Do you want me to stay with you for the night?" He asked While still hugging you. You pulled out from his embrace. "Yes, if you can..."

"Of course I can baby" he said kissing your lips.

And that's how you both spent the night drinking wine and talking about this whole week. He said sorry to you a couple more times and promised that you are his favourite person and he will never have enough of you.

End.

[obanaispy]

More ex hubby eren🌚🫶🏽

cast ! eren jaeger + reader

wc ! 1.6k+

tldr ! house party with your ex = house party with some sex

content ! dirty talk + alcohol + spanking + rough sex + light cunt slapping

a/n ! i took so long.. hope it was worth the wait!

“Its going to be the party of the century”

With an outfit like this? It better be. Y/n had pulled out all the works. A mauve colored spaghetti strap dress with the back cut out– the hem stopping right below her ass. Her neck was coated with a sweet Vanilla scented perfume, an arrangement of silver necklaces complimenting the fragrance. Connie had finally convinced them to leave their safe space by planning “The party to start the summer”. His words. Jean and Connie were the homies so it was hard to turn down their every invitation without feeling a bit of guilt.

Buckling her heel around her ankle, Y/n pulled out her phone to make sure her date for the night was still game. He would be an idiot if he wasnt. “Hello?” his voice rasped from the other end, sending a chill down her spine. “Hey Reiner, are we meeting at the boys?”. “No no.. i’ll pick you up”. Y/n smiled, “right answer.” Hanging up, she did one last round of perfume before going into the living room to wait. Maybe this night would be just what she needed.

At first it was, Jean was in charge of music and the vibe was absolutely right. Reiner had a hand on her waist, swaying along as she rolled her hips– ass pressing against him subtly. Y/n was 3 shots in and feeling right. Not drunk but definitely not sober. “I’m going to run to the bathroom” Reiner spoke into her ear before kissing it lightly, walking away and leaving Y/n to the wolves. “Cuff It” by Beyonce began to boom over the speakers, causing Y/n to holler, “this is my SHIT!”

“I thought that was you..”

She froze. Turning around, Y/n was met with no one other than her worst nightmare– Eren.Her hands immediately became clammy, the dance floor suddenly becoming too crowded. “Hey–” Y/n had vanished before he could even finish his sentence. Rushing into the kitchen, she found a plastered Connie with his face smushed into Sasha’s chest. “You mother fucker” Y/n seethed, yanking him back and pulling him into the pantry before slamming the door. “Woah woah… I didn’t know you liked me that way” he slurred, a drunken smirk on his lips. Y/n rolled her eyes, pinching him– “don’t flatter yourself, Gnomeo. Why the fuck is my ex husband here?”. Connie looked at her confused, frog blinking before clocking in, “oh shit….” Oh shit indeed. Eren and Y/n had a VERY messy divorce, the legal papers somehow not being enough to really call it quits. She had just now stopped responding to his booty calls… as well as stopping all of her own. She was free of him! So.. why did seeing him make her stomach fill with fluttering? She wasn’t 20 anymore, she saw him for who he was. A handsome basket case– unable to correct his own flaws.

“Y/n.. I swear hiccup I had no clue he would be here. He told me he was too busy to come” Connie stared at her , his expression letting her know he was being honest. Connie hated drama and suddenly, Y/n felt like a fool dragging him into his own pantry. “Okay… okay my bad. You know how I get when I see him” she sighed, hugging Connie tightly before opening the door. Walking out, she dragged him back to Sasha, apologizing and giving her a proper hello. After a few words of kindness, she turned to walk out before being blocked by him. “Do. Not. Run. Please.. Can we just talk” Eren asked, voice barely above a whisper, a light hold finding its way around her wrist. She could do nothing but stare at him for a minute, his eyes looked softer, his hair long enough to be pulled back into a sizable ponytail. Looking back at Connie and Sasha who were trying to pretend they weren't eavesdropping by throwing a golf ball into the same red cup. Beer pong my ass. “Fine… fine. You get 10 minutes.” She pushed past him, making her way through the crowd towards the back door. Once outside she scanned the space, spotting the greenhouse where they grew their.. happy grass. She quickly walked in that direction, Eren following close after.

“So..” she stated, arms folded as she made direct eye contact. “Soooo.. How have you been?’ Eren asked sheepishly, Y/n’s response being silence. For a moment neither of them said a word, the silence being filled with the faint of Sza’s, ‘I hate you’ blasting over the speakers. “Listen… I really do mean it when I say I regret how we fell out. You put up with a lot of my shit and.. sighs I'm way too grown to be acting the way I did.” Y/n just scoffed. Eren stared at her for a moment before continuing, “You look.. Gorgeous. See you came here with Reiner’. Y/n could tell he was trying to act unbothered. “Who I'm here with is none of your business” she smirked, biting her bottom lip. Why was she nervous? She should know better but… fuck he smelt good. Looked it too.

“Y/n…” he gruffed, an arm going around her waist to pull her closer before she could protest. “Come on, you don’t even miss me a bit? Don’t miss the way I could.. Handle you? Treat your body like a God? You know.. I still do worship you. I fucked up, I know but–” he was cut off by her lips meeting his, her hands immediately going up to bury themselves into his locks. Eren followed her movements, both of his hand wrapping around her waist, pressing his body against hers almost as if he wanted to fuse into her. Their bodies stumbled into a wall, Y/n’s dress being hiked up, her hands fumbling to unbutton his shirt. Eren’s lips traveled from her lips to her jawline– latching around the skin on the side of her neck. One of his hands found its way between her legs, palming her cunt through her damp panties. Y/n melted in his touch, legs struggling to keep her up as he slid the fabric to the side and pinched her clit in between two fingers– rolling the bud between them. His head came up from her neck to study her face– lips slightly parted to match her own. Y/n sighed out, hips jutting upwards into his touch, “please…”. Eren let out a breath, fingers pooling into her at the singular word.

He quickly found a rhythm, a curl joining each thrust in, his lips smashing against hers. Their tongues swirled around one another, Y/n sucking the tip of his tongue, teeth closing around his bottom lip with a harsh tug. Eren laughed into her mouth, his free hand going to unbuckle his pants while the other one kept busy. His fingers spread deep within her, making way for a third one while he wriggled out of his jeans. “You ready for me?” he said hurriedly, eyes dark with lust and possession. As soon as Y/n nodded, he replaced his hand with his cock– pushing past her folds as a grunt fell from his lips. “Oh fuck..” he growled, pace picking up quickly before she had time to adjust. Eren’s hand quickly went to her thigh, a firm grip bringing her leg up to wrap around him. He thrusted upwards as Y/n loosely wrapped her arms around his neck, eyes struggling to focus with the new angle.

“S-so Reiner huh?” he mumbled, head resting inside of the crook of Y/n’s neck. His thrusts were becoming deeper, balls smacking against her skin with each thrust. “Really thought pulling that shit was funny? Hm? Sorry.. I refuse to give this up” he said between clenched teeth. Before she could respond, Y/n was now flipped around and bent over– Eren’s dick slapping against her bare ass. “Want it?”. She couldnt help but roll her eyes, “yes, cmoon” she whined out. Eren chuckled before giving her a firm slap on her ass. “Youve done better than that in your sleep” he chuckled before cocking his hand back once more, allowing this one to land on her cunt. Y/n let out a yelp, thankful for the sound of the party.

“Please babe.. I miss your dick so much. You know that I feel good around you.. Please fuck what’s yours” she looked back at him as she spoke, cunt drenched at this point. Eren’s dark eyes looked down on her, strands of his hair sticking to his face— lips slightly parted. A smile slowly spread across them before he pressed his tip against her hole. Y/n sighed out in relief, hips going to push back against him— her eyes closing before opening at the feeling of him pulling away. “What did I do now?”

Eren chuckled, shaking his head, “just want you to look at me..”. Placing a firm grip on her shoulder, Eren slid himself all the way in— eyes focusing on the way Y/ns face contorted. Each thrust made it harder for her to focus, a couple of spanks from Eren reminding her of her instructions. “Yeah.. take that fucking dick..” he gritted, body twitching as he slowly started to lose rhythm. Suddenly, both of his hands went to her waist, thrusts becoming rabid as he pulled her back into each one. His rhythm was now completely gone, sloppy thrusts coming to an end as he came deep inside of her.

They both sat in silence for a minute, panting as they struggled to get dressed. Finally, Y/n cleared her throat— “I should…probably tell Reiner he can go home..”. Eren stared at her for a moment before chuckling, “he’s a grown man, he’ll live. Besides..” , he pulled her closer, “I don’t think this was enough to call it makeup sex.. Let me show you how sorry I truly am..”

[libbee]

✍️ ASTRO NOTES: loyalty edition ✍️

Preface: Sexual matters have more than just sex in it. Humans are not like animals that mate simply because it is mating season and they are in heat. Humans have greater consciousness and ego attitude. Humans have mental life that can form thoughts, judgments, ideas. Humans have emotional life that can feel happiness, bittnerness, shame. Humans have spiritual life where they see fantasies, archetypal images, do magical thinking (like astro, tarot, divination are magical/irrational thinking). Therefore, we should look at a combination of things when it comes to people.

I have had mixed experience with fire placements. Two people I know both had sun and mercury in 1st house. One native was a self-proclaimed ubermensch, selfish, promiscuous uncomitting, had double standards (i can do whatever i want). The other one is assertive, forceful, faithful to their partner and had double standards (I can do whatever I want). They don't even consider the wants of other people. They are like "Okay, I am done doing what I wanted, party over everyone. Now bye".

Aries and Scorpio are both ruled by Mars, both can be aggressive and bad tempered but the Aries anger is like candle flame (1) quickly lit and quickly blown out but the Scorpio anger is like charcoal (2) takes time to lit - stays hot for longer periods of time - hard to cool down. You can find a Scorpio still angry over something that happened years ago or even happened in their imagination.

Aries v/s Scorpio anger

If you want a faithful partner, their sun or moon should be in a water sign. This is especially for male partners because faithfulness is a personal value. I remember reading how people were shocked that Jay Z could cheat on Beyonce because she is so beautiful, rich, talented!! I think that most people don't understand what it means to be in a relationship. It is about personal value which comes from feelings. Personal value is not taught in school or it is not something you can memorize. Feelings and emotions are two different things. Feeling is how you relate to others. For example, if you feel empathetic for someone going through a tough time, you are using your feeling function. It is the difference between men who say "men are hunters, we are primitives, we want to spread our seeds for better survival of our offspring, we need many women, we are built like that, we think with our dicks" and then there are men who say "My wife is enough for me because I have a deep attachment to her, I cannot betray my feelings for her, I cannot separate my feelings from sex and I only want sex with someone whom I feel love and attachment for".

I would recommend doing tarot pull for each zodiac sign to understand the archetypes better. Zodiac sign = personality; tarot card = subpersonalities within each zodiac sign. It makes reading personalities so much rich experience because each sign has many sub-dimensions and tarot can tell what dimension you are experiencing at a given time.

Fire placements can stay faithful but it is out of convention not feelings for their partner. For example, in their society it is frowned upon to cheat so they resist cheating to keep social image. Sometimes I think that fire placements do a lot of behaviour for social image/performance even if there are no feelings involved. For example, sending 100 roses to their partner as a gift, not because they actually value their partner that much but because it is textbook definition of love and socially admired, it will make them look like a great lover in public.

Look at the relationship with mom, moon sign and house to figure out how a man perceives women, if he is capable of being in relationship and if he is willing to work on marriage or just wants a wedding for formality, household work, children etc.

I like to divide people in different lives, it helps understanding people better. A person has physical life, emotional life, spiritual life, material life, mental life, sexual life, for instance, a man can be sitting on date with you but emotionally he is connected to some other woman. He is physically there but emotionally not. A man can have a great job and bank balance but he is addicted to alcohol. This man is materially fulfilled but spiritually unfulfilled. A man regularly has good sex and that too with many women (or regularly has good sex with wife) and yet gives them all cold shoulder and does not respect/prioritize them. This man has an active sexual life but he is emotionally hollow. Two lives can or cannot align together.

In addition to above, people have a social and private life too. Socially what appears to be such a loving and friendly couple can be totally cold and detached in private life. How shocking! A lot of people do live a perfect enviable life socially, they can recite quotes and wisdom like no ones else but if you get closer to their private life you see how they are opposite of their social image. And if we are not careful, we ourselves can be in delusion and think that we have great life when actually we do not. For example, girls stay in abusive relationship for years because emotionally they think that there is great love and passion even if physically the partner is abusive to them. Then they move on and say 'I always had a gut feeling that something was wrong' it was their spiritual life warning them of what they were not mentally aware. So, it is sometimes recommended to do some serious self reflection if our physical, emotional, mental lives are aligned or we are only living in fantasies.

There are no rule books for life. This is why earlier when I was not much into astro, I used to watch motivational videos/how to content/generic advice for everyone and felt like it would not work for me. But with astro, it helps me be specific to figure out what things will work for me and what will not, based on my personality traits, strengths and weaknesses.

In order to figure out a person's sexuality, we look at their venus and mars planets. We also look at their mother and father complex because the relation with the parent is (taboo trigger) quite incestual on emotional level. When we are born, we are emotionally enmeshed with our parents especially mom. When we grow up, it is now time to break up the enmeshment, this is why in psychology we say that to individuate means to take responsibility for your life and have minimal emotional connection with parents. This sounds like cruelty but it is not.

What I am yet to understand is that if father is sun and mother is moon then why do we only look at mars and venus for sexuality? Sun and moon are just as important factors to determine sexuality. I am not sure if this will offend someone but it is often studied how people who are asexual/LGBTQ or even transgender have some kind of negative mother/father complex (even if it doesn't appear in physical life, it can be emotionally, mentally, spiritually).

Thanks for reading and to be continued.

[queenofthekings]

ᴘʟᴀʏɪɴɢ ᴡɪᴛʜ ꜰɪʀᴇ, ᴘᴀʀᴛ ɪ (ꜱᴇʀɪᴇꜱ ʜᴇʀᴇ)

Summary: You are part of the biggest girl group on the planet, Eddie is the face of the biggest rock band of the century. A chance meeting at Coachella sends both of you into what would be the biggest love affair in music history; if only people knew about it.

Pairing: Rockstar!Eddie x K-Pop Idol!Reader

Author's note: My love for K-Pop and Stranger Things/Eddie Munson in one fic? It's more likely than you think. If you don't know much/anything about the K-Pop world, not to worry, I'll be going over some of it in this fic! I'll try to keep the Korean honorific names to a minimum but I do wanna try to keep things as plausible as possible.

Disclaimer: In this fic, I have specified that Reader is not Korean or Asian. As someone who is white; I didn't feel it was right to write a POC character. Please be respectful.

CW: 18+, mentions of unhealthy eating habits, obsessive fan behaviour, toxic work environments, swearing, a little NSFW content, sexting, no use of Y/N but Reader's stage name is Luna.

Tagging: @munsonsbtch @impmunson @binickmiller @ali-r3n @stevesjockstrap

Word count: 2.6k

Any hate will not be tolerated, constructive criticism is welcomed.

APRIL 2019

Coachella was the biggest music festival in the world and playing there was an honour and a privilege; and while Eddie knew this, he found a lot of the hype around it insufferable. He never felt like his band belonged up there with the lights of Beyonce and Justin Bieber, even when Corroded Coffin had exploded with popularity, the larger venues they’d play out would never compare to the smaller shows.

Disliking Coachella when you perform there is one story, disliking Coachella and ending up in the crowd of one of the most talked about acts of the whole festival another matter entirely. But somehow, Gareth had convinced him to leave the tour bus to watch one performance. Only one.

“Why are we even here?” Eddie yelled into Gareth’s ear, trying to make sure he was heard over the screaming and cheering fans that surrounded them. The show hadn’t even started yet but the crowd was already at deafening levels.

“I thought it was high time you experienced a new genre of music,” Gareth yelled back, giving him a smug grin. “Plus, I hear one of the members of the group is a fan of ours.”

Eddie shrugged, knowing that Gareth was right in saying it was time to experience some new music outside of his usual comfort zone. And given the way the stage was set, the flags and lightsticks people were waving and demographic of the crowd; this was definitely outside of his comfort zone. “Who even are they?” he asked, grabbing his phone from his pocket.

Before he had a chance to type a single letter into Google, Gareth took his phone and pulled up a Wikipedia page for the group. “This is them. And before say anything, don’t judge the group before you listen to them.”

Eddie raised an eyebrow at his bandmate before looking at the page, giving Gareth even more of the side-eye.

Chain Reaction is a South Korean girl group formed by YG Entertainment, consisting of members Yoohyeon, Luna, Dahyun, and Yuqi. The group debuted in August 2016 with the digital single “Whistle”.

“K-Pop? Really, Gareth?”

“I said not to judge!” Gareth shrugged, just as the music began starting, causing both of them to look up. Eddie’s ears were already beginning to ring from how loud the fans were screaming; he was used to hearing fans through his in-ear during shows, but this was on a whole other level. Eddie didn’t pay much attention until he noticed the cropped t-shirt on one of the members, recognising the design and logo.

His heart skipped a beat, his mouth dropping open as he looked at Gareth who took the words right out of his mouth, leaning over to shout directly into his ear. “Yup, that’s a Corroded Coffin shirt, she’s a massive fan.”

Eddie chuckled a little to himself, shouting back into Gareth’s ear. “Maybe this won’t be so bad.”

After a couple of songs, the group began their introduction, all speaking in perfect unison and bowing to the still screaming audience. “Hello, we are Chain Reaction!”

A girl with dyed dark blue hair spoke up first, clearly showing her leader position. “Hello, Coachella, my name is Yoohyeon and I’m so thankful you all came out to see us!”

The crowd screamed as a response, causing the group to laugh and clap long. Then you spoke up, your long blonde hair making you stand out against the other members. “Hello, everyone,” you began, and Eddie’s heart instantly melted at your soft voice, especially at your accent. “My name is Luna, and I hope you enjoy the show.” You bowed a little, pulling down your shirt a little to make sure it wasn’t exposing too much.

As the other members introduced themselves, Eddie could hardly focus on them, he was far too interested in staring at you. He vaguely knew Yuqi had natural dark brown hair and Dahyun had dark purple hair – the only way he knew he could remember to tell them apart, probably a move from their manager so people could tell the difference.

Gareth noticed him staring, giving him a nudge. “Somebody’s got a crush.”

He glared back. “I just think she’s cute, completely not my type.”

Gareth gave him the look of “yeah, we’ll see about that”, already knowing that Eddie would at least attempt to hook up with you after the show. It was inevitable, it happened at any event or show he attended. The only thing Eddie Munson loved more than music, was women. It was rare if his hotel room didn’t have a groupie in it; and being the biggest rock band in the world meant there was an abundance of them wherever they went, Eddie would always have one on his arm by the end of the night.

Although the idea of you and Eddie together was adorable – a rock legend and a pop princess together? You’d be media darlings – although Gareth knew it would be like playing with fire. The fans of both of your groups would rip both of you and the relationship apart, the constant invasion of privacy from fans and the press alike would be almost unbearable.

But that’s the downside to being a public figure and dating someone just as well-known as you are.

Eddie wasn’t known for long term dating, either. The longest relationship Gareth had ever seen him in was his “high school sweetheart”, Chrissy Cunningham, only ended up lasting less than a year. Every other girl he’d been with wouldn’t last longer than a few weeks, he’d always blame it on his career, but Gareth knew that in reality, Eddie just didn’t want to be tied down to one person.

You, on the other hand, had no public relationship history. Being a K-Pop idol left almost no time for dating or even much of a social life outside of groupmates; and if a female idol was seen with a male idol outside of activities, fans would go wild and instantly assume they’re dating and usually boycott the idols for “betraying” them.

Once the group finished their final song; the crowd screamed and cheered, causing almost every member to look as if they were ready to burst into tears of happiness. The four of you joined hands to bow towards the audience as a thank you before you spoke up. “Coachella, we have been Chain Reaction; thank you very much and goodnight!”

Eddie kept his eyes on you, almost unable to take his eyes off you. You gave one last smile to the crowd, waving as you turned to lock eyes with Eddie. Even through the pandemonium that surrounded both of you, it all seemed to dissolve as if you were the only ones there.

You had to be almost dragged off the stage by your bandmates otherwise you would’ve spent all night just staring at Eddie. But even while you were being dragged off stage, you were desperately trying to find Eddie’s eyes again. You hoped you would be able to properly talk to him, even if you had to do it behind your manager’s back.

Backstage, the staff were cheering and applauding you and the band, giving their congratulations, and offering fans and water. You sprinted towards Yoohyeon, wrapping your arms tightly around your senior. The pair of you hugged tightly as you both broke down in floods of tears.

“This is all we ever dreamed of, unnie,” you sobbed, taking a tissue from a staff member to dab at your eyes, being careful not to ruin your makeup. Yoohyeon took the tissue from you and began trying to stop your tears. “I’m so proud of you.”

Yoohyeon laughed through her own tears, not caring if they ruined her makeup. “I’m proud of us, we’ve worked so hard for this, and you were perfect.”

You laughed a little through your tears, turning to the other two members and motioning them to come over and join in a group hug. Although there was only about a month between the two of you; Yoohyeon was definitely the older sister and mother of the group, and you were the baby sister who needed looking after and a lot of hugs.

You’d always been extremely close, even since your trainee days. Every night, you would tell each other that you’d debut together, no matter how hard you’d have to train or what you had to sacrifice.

But every member had sacrificed so much even to just get past the first audition; you’d given up school, friends, family, any chance of a normal life for one tiny shot at making it. But in that moment, all four of you knew that all the blood, sweat and tears you’d all poured into training was worth it. You’d all made it.

Walking arm in arm with Yoohyeon, the pair of you walked down the stairs to the artists area away from the stage, always looking back every few moments to check your younger bandmates were following behind both of you. You tapped Yoohyeon’s arm to stop her to let your members catch up, so all four of you could give your manager, Steve a celebratory hug.

As soon as you stepped into the artists area and saw Steve, you couldn’t control the excitement and relief of the performance; you screamed and sprinted towards him, jumping into his arms, and barely giving him enough time to catch you. You got on well with Steve, he became like a big brother to you and your fellow band members, even if he was a little strict with the four of you, but it certainly came out of a place of love and wanting the best for all of you.

“You were amazing out there,” Steve hugged you tightly, pressing a kiss to the side of your head as he slowly let you down out of his arms and handed you a water bottle with a straw in the top.

“Think we won ‘em over, boss?” You asked, smirking as you placed the straw in the side of your lips.

“Won them over? You guys have done more than that, Twitter is exploding, you’re the top five trends on Naver, you guys are all anyone’s talking about,” Steve grinned.

“We’ve made it!” You shouted in unison with your band mates, before all of you laughed and hugged. Sure, Chain Reaction was very successful in South Korea, but this was a whole new level of success and recognition. All eyes were on your group and despite that new level of pressure, you all thrived under it; the challenge was exciting to all of you.

Your bandmates took their seats and chatted excitedly amongst themselves, while you leaned against the wall, taking in every moment around you. You hadn’t even realised you’d zoned out until Eddie was stood in front of you. “I know I’m beautiful, but you could at least take a picture if you’re gonna look that much,” he smirked.

You blinked a million times in a second, partly to snap yourself out of your zoned out state but also partly because you could hardly believe your eyes that Eddie Munson – the Eddie Munson – was stood in front of you. You’d been starstruck almost ever since you arrived in California several days beforehand, but this was on a whole other level.

The memories of listening to Corroded Coffin late at night during your trainee days flashed through your mind a million miles an hour, how much their lyrics kept you going when you thought you might quit and how you’d spend so much of your free time watching their performances, hooked on Eddie’s stage presence.

And now he was here in front of you, talking to you.

It was all so surreal.

You blinked again, clearing your throat. “Sorry, I completely zoned out.”

Eddie laughed, nodding his head. “Happens to a lot of people, did you wanna get out of here? Go somewhere a little quieter?”

You nodded and before you could even say a word, Eddie took your hand and led you out of the area and around the back of the crowds of staff and tents, towards Corroded Coffin’s tour bus. You somewhat wanted to protest but you weren’t about to stop this once in a lifetime chance to talk with Eddie, so you kept your mouth shut as he opened the door for you to get inside before following you inside.

“Don’t worry, everyone else is enjoying the festival, they’re not gonna be back for a while. Can I get you a drink?” He asked, moving past you towards a small fridge.

You bit your bottom lip as you walked through the bus, taking a seat at the table. “Just some water… or a Coke if you have it.”

“Lucky for you,” he pulled the fridge door open and pulled out a water bottle and a small can of Coke, placing both on the table before sitting down opposite you. “I have both.”

You smiled softly as you took both drinks, taking a long sip of the cold water. “I suppose I haven’t really introduced myself; everyone calls me Luna,” you held out your hand towards Eddie.

Instead of shaking it, he took it and pressed a kiss to the back of your hand. “And what’s the name your mother gave you? Not the name the company gave you.”

Blushing darkly, you whispered out your birth name. It had been so long since anyone had even asked your real name that “Luna” more or less became your real name. But Eddie seemed to actually want to get to know you, the kiss on the hand was just a cherry on top.

“Beautiful name,” he mused. “It suits you better than the crappy stage name they gave you. How’d you even allow it to happen?”

You laughed softly as you took your hand back, wrapping it around the Coke can. “I was sixteen and very naïve when I came to Korea.”

“You were only sixteen?”

You nodded. “I auditioned for the company when I was about sixteen and then I moved to South Korea a few months later, it all happened pretty fast when I look back at it. I debuted when I was twenty.”

He sat back in the chair. “Looks like we debuted at the same age, I was twenty when our first album came out.”

“I never realised that! I listened to you guys throughout my whole trainee period, it really helped keep the passion for music alive for me.”

He smiled softly. “Well I’m glad it helped at least one person, that’s all that matters honestly. So… tell me more about you.”

You smiled back at him, leaning forward in your chair to get closer to him, beginning to babble about yourself, all the while he just looked at you with such care in his eyes, hooked on your every word.

After almost an hour, talk got to your company and just how hard it was being an idol. “Under contract, we’re not allowed to; drive, buy a car, smoke, drink, date, go clubbing, get plastic surgery, get tattoos, travel for a holiday, write and produce our own music, have control over our own money or our image. We can’t even show our faces in vlogs our friends have made.”

He raised his eyebrows. “I’m pretty sure that’s slavery.”

You laughed, shaking your head. “Trust me, this is heaven compared to how contracts used to be.”

He chuckled a little, placing a hand over yours. “Listen, I should let you get back to your members or your manager might have my head, but could I get your number and we could do this again sometime?”

You smiled, nodding. “Of course.”

[bangtanhoneys]

Grace & Places

SEOKJIN - LONDON

“So this is where your eomma comes from,” Seokjin stated as he looked at the house before him on a random street just outside London. He had no clue where he was and he honestly had no clue what day it was, he just knew that they had landed in the UK two days ago, they had just done Britain’s Got Talent and they had one day before they performed two sold-out nights at Wembley Stadium.

“Born and bred,” Grace proudly stated as she looked at the house. It was nothing when you compared it to some of the expensive property inside the city of London and it was nothing compared to what her mother was currently living in just outside Seoul, but this was Grace’s roots all the same. “My grandparents bought the house off my grandmother’s parents who had lived there before them and my great-great-grandparents lived here as well,” Grace explained as Seokjin linked their fingers. “So it’s home in a weird way.”

Of course, Grace had been born and bred in Manchester and until there was an opportunity to show Seokjin as well as the rest of the boys her hometown, London would have to do for now. Being a mixed Korean-British idol, the first of hopefully many, and performing at Wembley was a big dream come true and the fact she could show off her heritage to her boyfriend was just another spoonful of sugar added to the cup of tea.

The bodyguard near the car looked unimpressed just as Seokjin had. 

“Hmm, I hope you don’t expect us to find something like that in Seoul,” Seokjin mused as they turned away from the house after sending a picture of it to her mother. “I don’t think the security on it would hold the world away.”

“I think Taehyung has his sights on us all living together until we’re eighty,” laughed Grace as she took the keys from their bodyguard. “And I’m pretty sure he’d marry all of us at once if he had the chance.”

Grace was glad she got the opportunity to return home, albeit briefly. And maybe one day she would come back with her parents, then with the rest of the guys and maybe, just one day, with a family of her own.

YOONGI - LAS VEGAS

All Yoongi had heard the moment they stepped foot on the Vegas strip was ‘Yoongi marry me.’ 

It had been a running joke for a while now, appearing in various live videos either of Yoongi on his own or the group. And then the boys had started running with it and it only got worse after their live video they did when they had returned from the Grammys, empty-handed once again.

“How do you know so much about marriage in Las Vegas?” Grace questioned the next morning, all of them meeting in the suite to have breakfast together. Yoongi and Grace were the first ones to arrive, Seokjin had been the first awake but he had been taken by the medic to get his bandages changed.

“You know I look up everything about where we go,” Yoongi shrugged as he poured his coffee. “Plus, I wanted to know what the rules were in case you and Jin-hyung decided to surprise us all and get married at one of those chapels.”

It was hard to hide his grin when he heard his twin scoff, knowing full well there would be a slight blush on her cheeks. It had been five years now since Seokjin and Grace had finally got together and while it was old news, no one had stopped teasing the two eldest members.

“Do I look like the type of woman to be married by an Elvis tribute act?”

Yoongi paused and glanced over, taking in their female member with a serious expression. “Maybe if the tribute act belonged to Beyonce but definitely not Elvis.”

“See if you ever get invited,” Grace mumbled as she took her plate to the table.

“I have to be invited. Who else is going to know the rules and regulations and do all the legal bits for you? Who else is going to be able to stand there and help?” Yoongi followed Grace to the table, taking in great delight in where this train of thought was going.

“My Dad,” Grace replied with a grin, ignoring the put-out look that was tossed her way.

HOSEOK - LOS ANGELES

It was difficult to get time off during concerts, especially on a world tour and it was even harder when you were in the middle of celeb central, Los Angeles. But there was a need to stretch the legs and enjoy the California sunshine, which is why Grace was being cajoled into going on a trip to Melrose Avenue to get some ice cream, maybe do a bit of shopping and just enjoy themselves.

“You only dragged me along so I could do all the translating,” Grace sighed after she handed Hobi his ice cream, another bowl of ice cream to their bodyguard and lastly she took her own little bowl of banana ice cream which was covered in whipped cream and sprinkles.

“Noona! I’m offended,” Hobi dramatically gasped then pretty much squealed when a big bumble bee flew past.

“That’s karma,” Grace pointed out with a grin as she stuck her spoon into the ice cream and followed their bodyguard down Melrose Avenue. 

“Well, the translating is a bonus point but no, I just wanted to spend time with my noona. It’s not often we get to just come outside, and be normal for an hour before we’re locked away or on our way to the concert,” Hobi said as he kept his ice cream close in case any other insect decided to try.

“You just had to pick Los Angeles to do it in.” And she had a point because there were plenty of people milling around and Hollywood was just abuzz with news of whatever gossip was going around and it didn’t help that the biggest band out of Korea was in town.

“But at least we got ice cream.”

NAMJOON - SEOUL

Namjooning - the act of living as Kim Namjoon, including taking walks through parks, admiring nature, and feeding your mind and soul by doing the things you love. 

That was the definition that Google gave and it perfectly describes the situation that Grace currently found herself in. It was hard to say no to dimples when they flashed briefly and that innocence that was there when Namjoon came knocking, asking his noona if she wanted to go out for the day.

It was just damn hard to say no.

Which is why she found herself climbing up Inwangsan Peak, on a warm day, in not so suitable clothes. Maybe shorts had been the wrong idea and certainly the sneakers she had worn were going to give her blisters when she got down but listening to Namjoon talk about nature, the wildlife, how the plants grew in this particular region of Seoul and how he just thrived in being outside - whatever discomfort she was feeling or suffering with, Grace kept her mouth shut and simply enjoyed her time with Namjoon.

By the time they got to the top, Grace was more than ready to fly down and get herself an iced coffee and Namjoon…well, Namjoon had the biggest smile on his face as he took various photos of the view. She couldn’t help but laugh at how excited he was, even if this wasn’t his first time up the peak and that he was sweating just as much as she was.

“Joon, next time you want to do something like this, think of your poor Noona and pick an easy hike because these thighs can’t handle a peak like this,” Grace sighed as she rested her hands on her knees.

She couldn’t help but laugh along with Namjoon who took one look at her and started laughing, reaching into his bag to hand over a bottle of water. “Sorry noona, next time I’ll make sure we hike towards a bookshop.”

JIMIN - JEJU ISLAND

Hearing her phone alert her of an incoming facetime, Grace paused what she was doing and reached for the phone that was vibrating against the material of the desk. Seeing Jimin’s name flash up as well as the photo he had put as the profile picture, Grace chuckled to herself and answered the time.

“Noona!”

“Jimin! Where are you? Oh you're in Jeju, aren’t you? Are you enjoying yourself?”

Jimin turned the camera slightly, showing the Snoopy figure next to him. “My friend and I are having an amazing time.”

Grace snorted to herself as she took in the statue and shook her head, wondering not for the first time why Jimin had decided to go to Jeju Island in the middle of winter and from what she could see, there were some snowflakes on his coat.

“You must be crazy to be going there at this time of year,” Grace mused and frowned to herself when she realised her mug was empty. “But at least you're enjoying yourself and having a great time. Are you bringing me back anything?”

It had become a long tradition that if any member of the group was travelling abroad or even in Korea for work, vacation or just for a day away, they always brought their noona something back. The only two people who often forgot were Yoongi and Jungkook but Jimin always remembered.

“Of course! I’ve got it already in my suitcase for you and I’ll be back home in a few days so we’ll have to make arrangements to meet up. Don’t work too hard noona and I’ll see you soon.”

“Stay warm Chim and have a lovely time.”

TAEHYUNG - PARIS

Paris. The city of love, music, food and architecture. 

A second home to Taehyung who suited Paris with every fibre of his being. If there was a city that suited a person, it would be Taehyung. 

Grace could see that as they both journeyed to the Eiffel Tower, the final pit stop of the day before their concert. Yet there was a bit of concern as the cold affecting Taehyung had hit his voice badly and she was worried about him, she knew what he was like when it came to his health and how he would try and push himself to breaking point to achieve what ARMY wanted.

But for now, the two of them were exploring the city to see much of it before they had to leave and go onto the next city.

For Taehyung, having his noona there meant an extra layer of security, an extra layer of comfort as well as someone translating for him. He knew enough French to get by but having someone who could speak English better than Namjoon was even better, especially when his voice was starting to give way.

He tried to thank her when she handed him a drink as well as a small figurine of the Eiffel Tower, which probably cost enough euros for someone to blink rapidly at, but Grace just smiled and opened the bottle of water for him. It was a silent journey through all the sights but no words were needed to be said, as the two of them strolled arm in arm around the city that would welcome back Taehyung time and time again.

JUNGKOOK - BUSAN

It was odd that this would be the last time that all eight of them would be on stage together and that it would be another three years before the eight of them would be fully reunited. And in two days the announcement would come that seven members would be enlisting in the military, Seokjin going first.

Jungkook quietly watched everyone go about their business as normal - there was still that chaotic energy, the staff were still on stress tenterhooks, the band were excited and the group known as BTS were a mix bag of emotions. They would be seeing ARMY one final time and then would come their solo albums and then the military.

And all that would be left was Grace. 

His adopted mother would be the only one left holding the flag while also preparing for her own solo career. 

It seemed as if she knew what he was thinking as their eyes met and Grace made her way over, taking her place next to Jungkook. No words needed to be said as his tattooed hand reached over and gently took hold of Grace’s fingers, holding them tightly as they both watched time tick down before they would be called on stage.

Yet to Come in Busan would be the closing of chapter one and the start of chapter two. And the woman who Jungkook had known from when he entered Big Hit as a small teenager would start her own chapter in two years, ready to take the world by storm. 

[thepurplewombat]

Character headcanon ask: LXC + JGY!

Okay, so it's finally cooled down enough that my computer has stopped making distressed noises whenever I turned it on, PLUS! we even have power for a few hours today, so here goes:

Lan Xichen

Sexuality Headcanon:

I'm gonna be honest with you, I don't give a lot of thought to characters' sexuality, at least not in terms of having headcanons for them. In my head, LXC is probably some flavor of bi, except that in practical terms, he's A-Yaosexual.

Gender Headcanon:

I think I've read one fic where LXC was actually a woman - not in the sense that he any flavor of trans, at least that was not the impression I got, he was biologically and emotionally a woman, but he was presenting male because of Political Reasons, and I thought that was quite interesting. But in general, I think he's a cis male.

A ship I have with said character:

Oh I don't know, I just don't know, who could I possibly ship the incomparable First Jade of Lan with - it's Jin Guangyao. Like, I'm not going to say that xiyao is canon and everyone who disagrees is wrong (even though they are) because everyone is allowed to be wrong on Beyonce's internet, but any version of Lan Xichen that isn't in love with Jin Guangyao is a Lan Xichen who is so wildly out of character to me that I just don't know what to do with him.

A BROTP I have with said character:

I think he'd get along really well with Jiang Cheng as friends - like, among the reasons that I don't think they work as romantic partners is that I think Lan Xichen would find being in a relationship with JC utterly exhausting. As a romantic partner, you feel somewhat responsible for managing your partner's moods, in a way that you don't necessarily feel the need to do in a friendship. I just think that the distance of a friendship would give him the opportunity to enjoy Jiang Cheng's cunty tendencies and temper, while not making him feel in any way responsible for managing Jiang Cheng's moods.

A NOTP I have with said character:

That being said, Jiang Cheng is not actually my NOTP for this character. I remain convinced that chengxiyao is a viable ship that just needs the right story to take off, and I'm sure that if I were to read a really good x!cheng fic, where Jin Guangyao is not demonised or erased, I would probably enjoy it.

No, my NOTP is Nie Mingjue. Mainly because I think he's an abusive jerkweed who reminds me of both my murderous ex and my late father (although to be fair to the Great Old One, he never tried to kill me) and I don't think that someone who is incapable of understanding that maybe other people have different priorities and points of view, is a good fit to be in a relationship with anyone who doesn't precisely share his values.

Oh and also Nie Huaisang. Just no. NOPE.

A random headcanon:

Not long after the end of canon, Lan Xichen disappears from his house of seclusion and is never seen again, because he's given the entire jianghu the middle finger and fucked off.

General Opinion over said character:

When I finished the book he was my favourite, and I was initially drawn into thinking more about Jin Guangyao because I was looking for stories where Lan Xichen has a happy ending, and a lot of the time, a happy ending for Lan Xicnen requires a happy ending for JGY as well. In the months since, he's been somewhat supplanted by JGY - it's not that I love him less, it's that I love JGY so much more (send help I am genuinely unwell about Jin Guangyao).

More general opinion - I think Lan Xichen should have the opportunity to go absolutely feral.

Jin Guangyao

My lovely boy, my sweet cheese, my rotten soldier, I love him so much.

Sexuality Headcanon:

I mean, canonically he loves both a man (LXC) and a woman (QS) so, bisexual?

I do think he has a complicated relationship with sex, because of his mother's profession and his father's...everything, but I think that like most of his traumas, he pushes it into a box and never ever thinks about it.

Gender Headcanon:

I think that when he was a small boy, his mother went on her knees every day and thanked all the gods and ancestors that he was a boy, because at that point she must have still hoped that JGS would come for them.

So I don't think that JGY has ever actually thought about his gender beyond 'thank the gods I wasn't born a girl'. Like, he could never allow himself to even consider anything other than being a man, because he was his mother's son, you know?

A ship I have with said character:

Xiyao. They're just so *clenches fist* I love them, your honor. Like, they just so obviously love each other - it's more obvious in CQL, but it's not exactly subtle in the novel either, and I just...my heart breaks for them and I love them so much.

I can also be convinced about Chengyao, because I think that Jiang Cheng and Jin Guangyao have got some things in common, and the ways in which they differ are very complementary.

A BROTP I have with said character:

I think that he and Wei Wuxian could have been great friends, if the stars had aligned properly.

A NOTP I have with said character:

Obviously it's a free internet and everyone can do what they want, but personally I can't ship my blorbo with someone who tried to murder him three times and hated him so much that even without knowing that JGY had killed him, he became a fierce corpse and escaped the grave to come after him. Just nope.

A random headcanon:

I don't think that JGY would have left the temple that night. I think he was genuinely trying, because at base he's an engine of survival, but honestly I think when push came to shove and he had to leave Lan Xichen and never see him again, I'm not sure he would have done it.

General Opinion over said character:

I love him. he's my favourite character in MDZS, and he's near the top of my list of all time favourite characters.

[bisluthq]

The dems dropped the ball by letting Biden decline (and it has been obvious for the past couple years) with no game plan. And then they shuffled and put Kamala in an impossible situation with like 90 days. And whoever their strategist was, was a total idiot to make the campaign focused on shit that Kamala can’t even control — the Supreme Court reviewed Roe v Wade because it was technically, from a constitutional perspective, not correct to not let people in the states vote on it. This means that liberal states such as California are protected from conservative states (such as Florida) when it comes to abortion laws. Kamala and the democrats really tried to convince people that this could be changed back by voting her in office and anyone who has studied government should fucking know she was talking out her ass and scrambling to find something to use to propel her. And lost in the sauce were the working class! So much so that minorities and demographics of FIRST TIME VOTERS cast a ballot for Trump because the economy is so damn bad. Kamala dug her grave when she said a couple weeks ago when asked what her economic plan was that she didn’t plan to deviate from Biden. WTF, why would you say that?! That is the highest priority of so many undecided Americans. Lowkey convinced this woman did not want to win and was just stuck (also explains why she seemed on verge of a panic attack anytime someone asked her a damn question of substance about foreign policy or the economy). All she could do was parrot social issue crap which look. Citizens ultimately decide how that sway looks, presidents can’t really control how people view social issues, presidents are best for just sticking to basic government and the economy. I know diehard liberals like to frame themselves as being morally superior because they are so caring about rights, but guess what, there are families out here that are barely scraping by. When you have people that can’t afford to live anymore that cuts out their capacity to care about social issues because they are BURNT out. As Bernie Sanders aptly put it today, “It should come as no great surprise that a Democratic Party which has abandoned working class people would find that the working class has abandoned them,”

this is exactly what I think like word for word. 100%. I also wanna add a few things though: 1) the Dems and Kamala personally seemed out of touch af for the last while tbh and one could see that with the parade of celeb endorsements lmao like that’s very nice when celebs come out and encourage voter registration and getting people to vote sensibly but Kamala’s last few rallies felt very “let them eat cake” like people legit can’t feed their families and you don’t really have a plan on how to fix that and you’ve got Beyonce up there with you? Ok then. I mean like at that particular rally, and this legit happened, a bunch of people left after Bey was done talking and they realized they’re not getting a free concert right because like that’s why they’d shown up lmao but showing up for a free Bey concert (that didn’t even pan out, sorry to those people) /=/ voting for Kamala. Trump’s celeb endorsement (singular p much lol) was at least promising people a chance to win money which is wrong and unethical on like just about every level but way more effective as a strategy when, again, people can’t feed their families. 2) The mainstream media got just about as bad as FOX with regards lies there at the end, it’s just that the lies were geared at Trump not for Trump. The most egregious was when they were saying he wanted to put Liz Cheney in front of a firing squad lol when what he’d said is fuck the Cheneys and other war mongering politicians who sit in DC and send Americans to war. That’s legit what he said. Not sure at what point we became pro the Cheneys or war tbh. 3) People’s reactions and vibes online are never a barometer for anything ever and Kamala and her team should’ve known that. No amount of brat aesthetics are gonna be anything except a cute gimmick. 4) Biden Harris administration has screwed foreign policy badly and I think plenty of people didn’t vote or actually voted Trump based on Middle East too. Like they screwed economy and they screwed foreign policy so idk what there was left to vote for except “not Trump” (which fwiw I would’ve voted for if I was in the US but also probably not if I couldn’t afford food) and cute gimmicks and the abortion thing BUT AS YOU POINT OUT there is fuck all that can be done about Roe now that Trump undid it and before these Supreme Court justices retire/die which won’t be for a very long time. It’s now a states issue. If you live in a conservative state that seriously sucks like idk what to say there but Kamala wouldn’t have fixed it because she couldn’t have.

all of which to say it still sucks lmao that this was the situation right 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

[inkofamethyst]

October 4, 2024

[approximately 4 am]

In desperate need of a funky grandpa sweater :/ But like it has to be perfect. The perfect kind of funky in the way that the patterns and colors feel like my own handwriting even though it probably belonged to some dude before me. That makes sense, right?

You know, I don't think anyone has ever listened to my Core Playlist, current. It just, idk, it just feels so intimate (and also it's a bit of a mess! paramore, austin wintory, beyonce, hadestown, and the crane wives all on one playlist? cmonnnn only a little freak like me could stand it, I'm sure)!

My dnd-friend mentioned a bit ago that she was struggling with loneliness and isolation and having very little by the way of consistent friends contacts and I think having biweekly craft-n-chats will help. Not just for her, but potentially to connect the whole discord chat again in a way that we haven't been connected since college, or covid, or even high school maybe. And maybe it won't get back to the same level as I-see-you-in-classes-every-day-and-also-at-rehearsal-after-school-twice-a-week but we also won't suffer the same fate as the type of friends who get lunch once a year and chat shallowly about general life updates. We may be distant physically but we live in the the time of technology!

Pulling an all-nighter (which is crazy bc I'm p sure I only did that once the entirety of last year) because I screwed up my sleep schedule real bad earlier this week and also needed to finish this fellowship draft. My personal statement is pretty solid (I mean I'm by no means the most prolific researcher or active social justice person or whatever but by golly I found one social issue I was passionate about in middle school and haven't stopped working on it since (I mean ofc I care about other issues but this one has just always felt like I could actually make some impact and while I haven't quantified that impact at least my involvement has been consistent)) but my research statement is just blehh. blehhhhhh (it's coming along actually I'm just insecure lol).

Anyway the one problem with straight-up writing during an all-nighter is that I'll have a good idea then immediately forget it because I start drifting off a little lol.

[7ish pm]

Okay so actually my advisor's review of my proposal went well! Still have some edits to do before I send it out to my recommenders and probably another full round or two before I can feel good submitting it.

Considering that I only got ~40 minutes of sleep just before I had to leave, I was surprisingly alert today. I'm going to bed by 8 tonight though. Legend of Vox Machina tomorrow though!!!

Today, gah!!! Today!!! I'm thankful that my sewing adventure worked out!!! I'm going full throttle on the sewn Scarlet Witch 2023 comic costume (all thanks to my mother who made a face when I suggested crocheting it (she was right but I still think the design I had would be cool to try (I've realized that many of my crochet projects right now are more based on skill novelty and the self-challenge of design))), and I drafted the pattern for the base sleeved mockneck bodycon largely during Wednesday's craft-n-chat (could I have bought a pattern for this or even found one for free online? sure. but my pinterest-addled DIY brain will not permit such a thing. all in the name of upskilling!). Went to use the serger at the library for the first time and AHHHHH OMG IT FITS SO WELL! The serger was literally perfect (and the staff were super helpful) and I will absolutely be making the sleeveless mock neck with that fabric I've envisioned for that exact project since summer 2020. Anyway while it helps that I'm currently in the no-bloat part of my cycle and that the fabric was pretty thick to hide any lumpies, the fit is literally so perfect. Like it caresses my curves and accentuates them but is clearly not a garment that is just too small, it's just well-fitted. The literal perfect fit for a superhero cosplay :D

The pattern needs minor modifications (as to be expected), but it's fairly forgiving and can likely serve as a base for future designs now that I no longer need to be afraid of knits hehe (I can make a Bumblebee cosplay! I can make that specific Wonder Woman design I've loved for years! (I'm sensing a cosplay arc.. which is a little inconvenient because I'm trying to prepare for a Bicolline arc)). But right now I can mark up my mockup with style lines. I will need to source my fabrics and figure out the best way to assemble everything (at least for this Halloween first draft). And then and then and then I'm learning how to 3D print this weekend!! I may have Wanda's tiara finished by next week!!!

All this said, I only have three weeks until the halloweekend bar crawl and while Katara's wrap seems simple to draft I do still have to draft it. And I need to source fabrics for both costumes (Wanda's I think I know, Katara's I'm still debating). God this is so much fun.

I have some chores to do tomorrow, but I might also go trawl the nearby fabric and craft stores.

okie gn :)

[cowboylikemeaaron]

Masterpost on taylor and olivia's relationship (but taylor is at fault)

it's an ugly theory for taylor.. so if you can't handle criticism for her please don't read!

I'd like to start by saying I'm not an olivia stan, I've been a taylor stan for 10 years but this is the theory I found to be logical.

Firstly , let's look at this blind item posted on may 22/2023 because it's the spark for this theory

AA is taylor, AB is Matty healy, AC is olivia.

AD could be beyonce or Ariana but it is irrelevant

AE is deja vu and AF is hayley william

AG is good 4 u

So anyways now that we have layed the ground for the theory let's discuss

From olivia's dawn of time to April 2021:

Olivia has always talked over and over how she's the biggest swiftie on earth.. and in January 2021 taylor commented the famous "I say that's my baby and I'm really proud" and she was also sending Olivia gifts.

And then Fearless TV is announced, and the also famous reel of Olivia and Conan on White Horse TV

Also note that taylor sent olivia the Red ring and olivia talked about it which was in march 2021

So far everyone is everyone's bestie right and they're both in each other's business?

And it continues, and they meet in 11 May 2021 in the BRITs awards where they photographed together and it's all very cute

Now before we move on to the sour release let's talk about olivia for a little:

She was just 18 at the time, she was resembling to taylor's style in many ways:

She wrote about her personal life and had drama around her with her ex and how he cheated

She wrote all her songs and her style is close to Taylor which is fast songwriting and just gets the idea and write about it.

BUT also she differed from Taylor in the following and I'm here talking about late taylor pop album Lover because folklore isn't in the same category:

She made her album very short which helped in the streams

She chose the best singles for her album

She got viraled on tiktok with most of her tracks

Now keep in mind that lover technically flopped (IN TAYLOR'S EYES ONLY), and while folklore has just won AOTY, fearless TV also wasn't that huge of a success (which might be okay as i don't think she thought that the rerecords would make that much of a hit) and ofc evermore also flopped in her eyes (I just know that the willow flop incident is still hunting her), and as a Taylor fan we all know how crazy she gets when her albums aren't breaking all records left and right, and how especially in the lover era she was talking about how she's never gonna get more famous, but then ofc folklore happened, and she started gaining some new fans this time and also the rerecording thing boosted her, but in her head she had about 3 out of 4 albums that weren't up to her standard.

Panic in swift city:

Sour release May 21

Sour is released, olivia is breaking every record left and right and taylor's records, and her spotlight, and her fans because everyone saw that they were friends so they were double stanning. And ofc, miss swift who wrote nothing new would start to feel threatened right? She did.

Sour dropped and taylor had "non collaborative credit" on a song, which is "1 step forward, 3 steps back" that was sampled from new year's day, now of course Olivia got approval for this her and Taylor are besties, and when the album dropped taylor had credits for this one song, and knowing taylor which is also miss "get a good lawyer" she wouldn't let Olivia not write her credits on only one song if there was another..

Video below has olivia talking about the album and she mentions she got approval for 1sf3sb

Now let's talk about the first thing that could be shady:

May 28 2021: evermore vinyls release

So after 1 week of sour, taylor finally drops the evermore vinyls. Like imagine if the situation has been reversed and another huge artist drops something 1 week after taylor's album release? Girl would have eaten them alive. BUT ALSO, she could have scheduled it from early. But also also, she could have postponed it for 1 week. I can't really tell but it just seem weird to release them when Olivia is your baby right?

Which btw resulted in Taylor of course dethroning Olivia the next week. Yes it is weird.

July 9th 2021

Taylor and Jack got writing credit for deja vu which was a mega successful hit, which is weird.. why now? And they say it's because "cruel summer" influenced deja vu, which if you ask me doesn't make sense if you listen to the songs, but anyways it happened suddenly?

My theory is, taylor saw how sour preformed, and how big deja vu was and of course olivia has told her that cruel summer inspired that, and probably asked her if she was okay with it, and taylor said yes. But then she changed her mind with how well sour got and wanted a piece of the pie, so maybe she threatened a lawsuit? Maybe she just said she'd unleash the angry swifties? Maybe olivia just wanted to be polite? Who knows

After that and for most of the year, they stopped mentioning each other and it was radio silence.

December 6 2021:

Grammys change their rules, which meant that taylor wouldn't be getting a grammy for sour.. which of course made taylor even more mad because we all know how much she loves getting a grammy. Now ofc red tv was released and she was getting more loved by everyone and she was everywhere. But nothing is ever enough for taylor on a famous level, or a grammy level.

April 4,2022:

Taylor and Olivia are at the Grammy, supposedly they're still friends, taylor should be supporting olivia for her album with 2 taylor influence right? no. They don't interact all night and sour wins 3 awards and does a 2009 Fearless Taylor moment, while Taylor gets 1 award which is still huge, but Taylor gets jealous of Olivia being in the spotlight for 1 year, and wining all those awards and most of all, being compared to her all the time.

Keep in mind that swifties were dragging olivia left and right and they kept saying she was benefiting off taylor and she was a fake because they claim olivia betrayed taylor for some reason, olivia was (and still) gets hate everywhere and even snake emojis. Which is something taylor could stop with a tweet/story mentioning Olivia in any good way which will result in swifties stopping acting like assholes.

After and until now, olivia never mentions taylor, only Conan Grey who is olivia's bestie and also a diehard swiftie as he used to claim said that he didn't get a chance to listen to midnights which fueled swifties.

Now there could be 3 things:

1. Taylor was really jealous and threatened by Olivia so she cut her off and took the credit out of jealousy and probably in a not nice way in july 2021.

2. Olivia wanted to separate herself from Taylor because swifties were saying she's using taylor for clout (that's the most popular narrative)

3. Olivia is the shady one and didn't want to give taylor credit (highly unlikely because she was just debuting and she's a huge fan of Taylor)

Personally i do not think olivia or her team would let her be stupid enough to start a feud with taylor, we all know how this ends. And especially when Taylor is a role model to her. So why would she fight with taylor and risk her getting angry and get endless hate from her army that holds grudges till the end of time against anyone that comes near taylor? Additionally, I think even if there was a little tension, olivia still wouldn't cut Taylor off because she's useful to everyone who's her friend as i said swifties hold grudges but they also worship anyone who's her friend. So my guess is taylor is the one who started this thing, and regarding the second possibility, maybe olivia wanted not to be in the shadow but Taylor got hurt over this.

Let me know what you think!

[mysteriouslytransparentwitch]

HI ! :-)

I had my operation this morning at 7 a.m. I left at 1 p.m., currently I'm at my mother's, I'm going home on Saturday (I forget it's only Thursday) the operation went well (sorry for the details, I keep losing blood) but she removed everything, I hurt downstairs, I'm all swollen, I have to lie down and rest for 4 days of sick leave. Price of the operation 785 euros therefore 152+ 289 at my expense, I will eat up the month of January and February financially, I must admit that she did a good job. I hope to have better health in 2023.

otherwise, I read you from my bed, I laugh at your reaction (on meghan and harry) but this hindsight was beneficial because I was able to see certain things.

currently, american citizens and royal watchers are just drowned out in the communication from meghan and harry, it's actually a non-stop hubbub from them. I can understand the indifference and the change of games and image for harry and meghan in the usa. My question was what are they going to do after all this? in reality the royal family will be fine. Meghan still said people born prince and princess and the queen were jealous of me because I was better than them lol lol wtf or this sentence the Canadian people thanked me for my work on behalf of the nation lol lol (she is just crazy at this level) Harry who discovers that he can be punished by his family for the first time.

I realized that the brf must do nothing and continue to do its job. By saying nothing, they simply gain height and that sends a sign: we are tired ok, we can continue.

By this I mean that currently, Catherine is giving a concert for all the volunteers and a moment of compassion for all the people who have lost a loved one this year and a tribute to the Queen.

While harry and meghan's goal is to become a leader lol hollywood doesn't want them and neither do the democrats.

I loved the beyonce moment (remember when she got in touch with a former beyonce coach = beyonce is not giving any more news and meghan is trying to lure beyonce into her file, I wonder how she reacts to the exposure of his private life) we'll see.

I know that @houseofbrat is seeing a divorce soon but I admit I would like an announcement in February or March 2023 because after their flop on netflix then the book because of their overexposure, I am impatiently awaiting the announcement of the end of the contract from netflix my little finger tells me it's going to make some noise.

I would like to see their communication plan to relaunch after the polls and their poor image management

[aectpen]

STRAWBERRY ✯ 𝙕𝙃𝘼𝙉𝙂 𝙃𝘼𝙊!

m.list

synopsis: 𝐢𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐚 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐮𝐧𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐥𝐨𝐲𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐟𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐢𝐝𝐨𝐥

pairing: Zhang Hao of ZB1 and fem!oc

status: ongoing

chapter 11: deal

the next day, rina woke up to a slew of good morning messages to hao. 

haohao 🐼:

good morninggg nanabear

10:15am

good morning?

i rlly pulled out that cringey nickname for u

and this is how you repay me ?

11:00am

even he was weirded tf out..

12:15pm

you better be dreaming abt me

12:45pm

riri 🐼

i was dreaming abt juyeon actually 😘

good morning haohaobear 

that doesn’t sound as cute as nanabear

haohao 🐼

yeah you're sick

and it’s afternoon now idk if you know this yet

riri 🐼

wrdgaf

what are you doing today?

haohao 🐼

im literally about to die of boredom

i kept scrolling youtube and got to the point where i’m watching a honey

badger fight off a bunch of lions

riri 🐼

you know what would make your day better?

haohao 🐼

hmm idk humor me

riri 🐼

buying breakfast and bringing it to meeeee

haohao 🐼

you're gonna give me a house tour?

riri 🐼

house is a strong word

it would take one 360 spin and you're done!

haohao 🐼

send me the address and i’ll be there asap 

riri 🐼

this is why you’re my favorite person on the planet kinda

rina sprang up from her bed, eager to get ready to see hao. she may or may not have hastily stuffed everything in sight into her closet to create the illusion of cleanliness. when he said "asap," he meant it. in the midst of fixing her hair in front of the mirror, the doorbell buzzed.

"who is it?" she teased.

through the peephole, she could see his amused expression. "vogue 73 questions."

the moment she opened the door she yanked him in roughly.

“are you trying to dislocate my shoulder?” he pouted.

“my neighbor is on the balcony.” she closed the door behind him.

“you’re acting like i’m beyonce. i promise you the grandma living next to you has not a clue who i am.” he plopped on her couch, laying out the breakfast on the coffee table. 

the two shared a meal while binge watching dramas. "watching" might not be the most accurate term; they chatted incessantly, offering commentary on every single scene. they were the kind of people you should never go to the movies with—they'd talk your ears off, sounding more like characters themselves than the ones on screen.

as they progressed through the episodes, they found themselves gradually edging closer on the couch. each thought they were slyly shifting a millimeter every ten seconds. eventually, they both scooted over at the same time, resulting in them turning to each other and bursting into laughter at their synchronized stupidity.

“you thought you were slick,” rina laughed at hao’s shocked face.

“me? you were doing the same thing!” he poked her side.

he gave in to his wants and snaked his arm around her, snuggling into the crook of her neck. even peppering faint, feathery kisses on her collarbone.

“hao, are you trying to put me into cardiac arrest?” rina whined.

as his kisses ventured lower, rina’s doorbell buzzed unexpectedly. they looked at each other confused as she wasn’t expecting anyone.

peering through the peephole, she was met with haemin and hyemi waving at her. she quickly turned to how and signaled him to go hide in her room. she opened the door just enough for her to stick her head out, “can i help you?”

haemin pushed the door open, “i thought we could all hang out.” she looked like she was looking for something, more specifically someone.

rina watched them make their way to the couch and tried to sneakily kick hao’s shoes out of sight.

“big breakfast?” hyemi snarked.

“can you guys come another time? i’m planning to go out right now.” rina knew she shouldn’t piss them off given what they know about her.

“where? can we tag along?” 

haemin was almost a whole new person—someone that was one the sweetest best friend rina could ask for turned into somewhat of a mean girl. it was totally out of her character. it truly doesn’t take much for a friendship to turn sour.

“okay, i’m not going anywhere. what is this about?” 

“is there a reason you don’t want us here?” haemin tilted her head with a mocking tone evident in her voice.

“what do you want from me. we all know what this is about; let’s not play dumb.”

“i have a deal for you,” hyemi walked closer to rina “get me jebewon’s phone numbers and address, and i won’t spill the beans about your little relationship.”

rina looked at the girls incredulously. she knew they had bad intentions but this crossed so many lines. haemin was always a big fan of idols, but never displayed sasaeng behaviors. this revelation was a punch to the gut for rina. it always hurts when someone you know so well proves that you didn’t know their true nature

“you don’t even have proof of anything.” she forced out a nervous chuckle.

“you think we don’t know about your park dates? could you be any sloppier?” an insulting tone laced in haemin’s words. “i know he’s in your room, you are so predictable, rina.”

“what would you even do with the phone numbers and address? they could easily change their numbers, and they have security.”

“we could sell information on them,” hyemi chimed in “it’s your choice, you wouldn’t want to see your baby boy get hate, would you?”

“text me your decision, or we’ll do what we have to do.” haemin said before the two finally left.

rina walked over to her room to see hao fast asleep on her bed, she could’ve sworn they only talked for five minutes. she sat next to him and smiled at his cute expression—eyebrows furrowed his lips slightly parted. however, her smile faded once she realized the choice she had to make. how could she possibly win in that situation? she knew the difficulties that would come with dating an idol, but she didn’t know those difficulties would arise from her supposed best friend.

she looked out her windows and doors to see if haemin and hyemi were watching her. she wouldn’t put it past them to do a stakeout for blackmail.

should we just stop seeing each other? she thought to herself. she didn’t want it to come to this, but she felt a great sense of guilt. dating scandals can very well ruin images. she didn’t want to be a source of stress and trouble for him and his group. all these thoughts caused tears to well up in her eyes and soon stream down her face. she didn’t want to lose him, but she didn’t want to hurt his livelihood. i can’t tell him about this.

[asherlockstudy]

Alright, i was watching the leatest ear biscuits... And what the fuck was that..link giting upset at rhett for not wanting to "skin the almonds" Like what are thay actually talking about there….

"Why not try it" " i'm giving you a gift", "you'r afraid of what pepole might think of you"??? "No one will know"… Rhett saying " i'm open to alot of things, but there's some things that i don't need to try", link responded by saying "will that a way to be closed minded…"

Idk … …. but that whole section felt weird, link just got defensive about it, Like it felt Like thay were not JUST talking about skining almonds…

Bless you Anon. I am doing poorly right now, I have neck pain and my tolerance to it is next to zero. I just finished watching Ear Biscuits and as you can understand, I could barely watch it. But then the snippets I caught had me wondering "hold on, what on earth are they talking about it and why are they making such a big deal?!"

I found almost the entire episode strange. I have some thoughts about it but because I couldn't fully analyze them due to pain and lack of concentration and also because I didn't want to say anything inaccurate / misinterpreted, I was about to come here and just invite followers to watch the episode and tell me their opinions.

So I felt sooo relieved when I saw your mail! It seems to me there's something up with this episode. Briefly

there is something off about the voicemails and the topics discussed

the peel the almond skin convo, from a guy who is willing to try just about everything except he apparently draws the line at peeling the almond very stubbornly

the whole discussion was indeed phrased in a very peculiar way alluding to urging someone or not being open to new (or controversial to "certain people") sexual practices

the weird "how do I tell my aspiring photographer friend they suck at photography" voicemail and Rhett's advice to help your friend out by doing with them what they would do with a "regular client" to help them practice (since you're sending me a mail about Rhink, I believe you know what I think this means, right?)

A whole lot about striving for connection and understanding towards the friends being new to something or wanting to try something, instead of correction

that Beyonce voicemail was also so out of place but I am no good judge because I haven't listened to her in the last 15 years or so. Is there anything about this album that could be relevant in our context?

At the time I was listening, perhaps I had more thoughts but they are slipping away. I don't mean all this certainly means something more, because I don't think we have enough evidence of it but I certainly agree that there were suspicious vibes throughout.