#they still made it happen in the show and that fucking sucks
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No Te Contaron Mal 🕷️
w/c: 2.5K
pairing: fwb!miguel o’hara x latina!reader
tags: 18+ smut. fwb to lovers, jealousy, stubborn to not tell him, finding out he kissed another girl, getting mad, folding anyway, sucking him off, then getting mad n jealous again, arguing, kinda toxic but funny, reciprocated feelings, dumb confession, making out, grinding, riding, unprotected sex, creampie
a/n: something so dumb and silly- y’all this song pisses me off every time i listen to it i HAD to finish this
smutmas masterlist | main masterlist
imagine just having a casual thing going on with miguel. you could call it a friends with benefits type of deal but you weren’t exactly going out with other people but it also wasn’t anything exclusive.
now the problem happened when one of your friends told you that she saw miguel kissing another girl at a club. something in that moment changed but you couldn't get yourself to admit that it was jealousy. especially when you made such a big fuss of it being something casual and nothing more.
so you did what you thought was best to get rid of even the mere thought of jealousy/your true feelings for him and just ignored him.
especially because you had gotten into a stupid argument yesterday which probably led to him making that decision in the first place.
the next day he texted you and the pure audacity of a man to want to fuck the night after kissing another girl was astonishing.
but he didn’t know that you knew and even if he did, he’d just tell you that you have no business to complain because you were the one that wanted something casual.
so you were fucked no matter what and folded anyway.
after he ate you out and made you forget all about your inner horrid feelings, you decided to repay the favor so you were between his legs on his bed sucking him off just how he liked.
his praise this time around had you feeling different, in a way made you shy and not want to look at him. so you closed your eyes, thinking it would help if you didn’t see him and that it wouldn’t bring the flashbacks of your heart being broken into little pieces from your friend telling you what she saw last night.
but yet his words now felt gentle, and for once in his life, loving. it was weird but nice. really nice.
you didn’t know what it was, just that your face felt like it was burning and your heart was fucking pounding. there was no way he knew but now it just brought up the question of why did it have to be casual?
why didn’t he wanna take you out to drinks to show you off to his friends? to kiss you in public like you were his? and even though he has you as a reliable booty call, why the fuck did he still feel the need to be kissing other girls?
you've dropped hints here and there, at times bringing your flirt game to extremes so he can figure it out himself but would apparently still be clueless.
if he wanted it to be something more he would’ve told you by now because some things he’s said makes it seem like he did. there was still a part of you that just had an inkling he might feel the same.
but although maybe you were just losing it since he literally kissed another girl last night.
the annoyance and jealousy quickly came back, pissing you off so badly and you couldn’t keep it in anymore. your eyes shot open and you pulled away from him, quickly sitting up and reaching over to put on his shirt to cover yourself while he looked at you confused and concerned, “why the fuck were you kissing another girl last night?”
he scoffed and shook his head in disbelief looking at your face to see if you were joking. he was quiet for a few seconds, absolutely shocked before finally speaking, “are you fucking serious?”
“eva dijo que te vió-“ (eva said she saw you-)
“es enserio…?” he says with the most dumbfounded look on his face, “please tell me you’re fucking with me.” (is this serious/real..?)
“me contó mal o que? ya dime para hacerme la idea de verdad.” you spat and cross your arms against your chest. (did she tell me wrong or what? tell me now so i can have the idea in mind for real)
you weren’t so sure what answer you wanted and knew you had no right to complain but still. this has been a situation for years now and even with all the arguments and the endless bickering, you've still stuck together and never swayed from each other.
until now.
“quieres hablar de esto ahora? ahorita mismo?” he asked and you scoffed, “cuando más?!” (you wanna talk about this now? like now, right at this moment?) (when else?!)
he tried his hardest not to laugh, knowing damn well if he did, you might just kill him.
he was shell shocked, and couldn’t believe this was actually happening. of all possible things he thought you’d be upset at or have to complain about that wasn’t even in his head as an option.
he never would’ve guessed that you knew otherwise he would have avoided sending a text in the first place.
“you’ve got me fucking speechless- i can’t believe this.” he mutters and you chuckle, "can say the same thing about you."
"don't do that-" he starts but you quickly interrupt, "don't do what?"
"you know what." he says calmly and you scoff.
there was a solid moment of silence for maybe a minute before finally he sighs and nods, “i’m gonna answer all your questions okay? but you have to let me finish.”
“fine.”
“no te contaron mal y ni te lo voy a negar.” he starts making you groan but he gives you a look before you could start to complain. (they didn’t tell you wrong and i’m not even going to deny it.)
“we kissed but that was it. maybe a couple times but it was only that.. okay maybe a couple caresses too but that was really it.” he explains and your heart starts beating faster with every passing word.
you give him a look and he sighs, unable to just not tell you the whole truth, “we flirted, i mean what was i suppose to do? you shouldn’t have an opinion on this given you practically cut me off yesterday..”
and before you could even begin to correct him, he just kept going,” and you know what, i got drunk because of you so if you think about it… this is your fault.”
you could only gasp then scoff before he immediately regretted it, shaking his head and coughing, “what i meant to say… that it was just one girl, and one is nothing. especially since it was just a couple kisses.”
“it doesn’t count as anything and truth be told, i couldn’t stop thinking of you.” he says, the last part making you gulp.
��just need you to know that you have me so fucked up in here.” he adds and points to his head.
“i have you fucked up?!!?!” you asked and he nodded.
“yesterday you went on another tangent that this is casual and i believe you said that nothing could change that so tell me, what the fuck changed?” he asked, sitting up and scooting towards you.
beyond annoyed, embarrassed, and lowkey ashamed, you were just about ready to do the walk of shame out of his apartment and drive your ass home. but he wasn’t going to let you.
there was determination in his eyes and you didn’t think you’d give him a confession in this point and time. let alone after being the one to always remind him it was nothing serious but yet it’s been serious.
at least it was on your end.
you’ve just been digging a hole to store those feelings in because after doing this with him for so long, you didn’t actually expect to gain something else for him that wasn’t purely sexual.
“i figured if i was the one to keep repeating this was as casual as can be then maybe…” you start then take a very deep breath before letting it out and looking away from him.
“then maybe i’d stop thinking of you in another way. or that i wouldn’t get excited when you’d text me or that i wouldn’t laugh at your stupid fucking jokes.” you explain, letting out a chuckle before continuing, “i just figured if i kept repeating the same thing over and over that i’d be able to convince myself that i didn’t like you. that this really is casual and that i haven’t lost it.”
you stopped and relaxed, taking slow breaths while you felt him scoot closer to you. you were already dreading this whole conversation and wish you could just fly away from your problems.
but unfortunately that wasn’t an option.
his hand went to your chin, gently bringing it up so you could look into his eyes. he had a stupid grin on his face while he just sighed and shook his head, “you’re too fucking stubborn.”
he moved his hands to your cheeks and brought your face to his, surprising you with a kiss while you gasped and quickly kissed him back. he smiled through the kiss, finding it to be sweet and freeing, given this was completely unplanned but not unwelcomed.
you quickly straddled him while he moved you both back so he could be closer to the pillows. your hands were already in his curls tugging on them while he slid his tongue into your mouth and his hands went down to your hips, making you grind against his hard on. you both moaned and you quickly ate it up, gliding your tongue against his while you grind against him bare.
his hands gripped your skin, somewhat tugging on his shirt wanting to take it off but you were making the kiss so hot and sloppy, he couldn’t be bothered to actually take it off you. he brought a hand down, moving his dick so you can slide on it better, knowing it won’t take too long before you get impatient.
but you weren’t, at all.
you were so caught up in the kiss that neither of you pulled away and didn’t feel the need to like you would any other day. hell, you never really kissed ever but after a confession like that, it felt right.
so you continued kissing him like your life depended on it while occasionally moaning into his mouth making him do the same.
meanwhile his hands were grabbing, and squeezing every part of your body.
up and down your back, on your thighs, squeezing your tits, pinching your nipples, smacking your ass. absolutely everything while you kept slowly grinding against his dick, leaving it all wet with your slick.
he was trying his hardest not to explode and just deal with the edging, as well as how warm and wet you were just because he couldn’t believe this was happening. he had to restrain himself, he didn’t want to waste a load that could easily be inside you.
you felt him twitching and your poor pussy was clenching, so you decided enough was enough and brought a hand down to his dick, lifting yourself up a bit and line his tip to your entrance.
he softly kissed you while you did so, just slowly lowering yourself down, taking him in and feeling him stretch you out. he tried his best to keep quiet but his head was mush and he was losing it.
once you bottomed out, he moaned in your mouth then pulled away, “fuck-“
you leaned your forhead against his and lifted your ass up just to slam down making him hiss, “eager huh?”
you chuckle and shrug, “maybe, may as well right?”
“seems you’re close anyway baby.” you tease making him playfully roll his eyes.
“some things never change huh?” he teases back and holds onto your hips, helping you come up.
he then makes you go down and you go back up again before he slams you down. you then do it all again but this time without stopping since you’d gotten enough practice to actually be able to ride him yourself.
he just very occasionally liked lending a helping hand or two.
and not just because he was greedy but also because he knew how much you love his touch. so it was to no surprise one hand was on your hip and the other came up front to squeeze one of your breasts.
you moved faster, wanting this to be a short ride so you could just lay in his arms afterwards and hear his own confession. at times he was a man of few words but tonight didn’t feel like one of those times.
especially not with how extra touchy feely and vocal he is.
it was like a miracle in disguise that you confessed, he was praising you like never before and even looking at you differently. in the best way imagineable too. maybe there was a chance he always has looked at you in a loving way or maybe it was just wishful thinking but it’s definitely the real deal now.
suddenly he grabs your head and you’re now looking over his shoulder, “your patience ran thin baby?” you whisper in his ear and he just grunts, “just hold on.”
you wrapped your arms around him and he did the same before he started thrusting into you making you jump and hold onto him tighter. he was fucking into you with ease, his thighs doing the work for him while you cried out into his shoulder.
your nails dug into his shoulder blade and back only motivating him to do it even faster. he was hitting your sweet spot so effortlessly and it was too good.
too good that you already felt your orgasm build up in your lower belly. you gasped and tried to control your moans but with his ruthless pace it was to no use and they blessed his ears anyway.
“baby i’m so close- fuck- it’s too much.” you whine making him let out a loud groan.
“it’s okay baby, i’ve got you. gonna cum so good for me, aren’t you pretty girl?” he murmurs amiing whimpers leave your mouth.
“i always take good care of you, don’t i?” he asked and you just hum, nodding.
you held onto him even tighter and lay your head on his shoulder as he thrusted harder into you. the sounds were even louder than before and him doing it like this made it feel ten times better just because he can hit your sweet spot deeper.
you closed your eyes shut as your orgasm hits your entire body, leaving you shaking and crying out while miguel spilled his load inside you also shaking. your body spasmed a bit and your walls entrapped miguel’s cock, making him groan and give one final thrust to ride out your highs.
you were both breathing heavily and holding onto each other while attempting to catch your breaths. miguel took deep breaths and laid down properly while you shifted around to get comfortable and lay your head on his chest.
he kissed the top of your head then your forehead and let out a sigh as he wrapped his arms around you gently. your eyes felt heavier by the second and the last thing you heard was him saying this was never casual for him before drifting off to sleep.
#miguel ohara#miguel ohara imagine#miguel o hara#across the spiderverse#atsv miguel#miguel ohara x reader#miguel ohara x y/n#miguel ohara oneshot#miguel ohara smut
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Freckles
Being a closeted trans guy isn’t easy for anyone these days. Trust me, I’ve got the scars—metaphorical ones, at least—to prove it. But when it comes to my family, the challenge isn’t what you might expect. They’re not exactly waving rainbow flags at every Pride parade, but they’re not storming drag shows with pitchforks either. They’re comfortably, frustratingly middle-of-the-road when it comes to identity politics. You know the type—“We support you as long as it’s not too inconvenient.”
So, no, the problem isn’t their politics. The problem is the Elber Family Reunion Swap.
Let me explain. Every summer, my grandparents rent this massive villa somewhere in the world—we’re talking infinity pools, tennis courts, and a “staff quarters” vibe. It’s fancy. During this week of forced family bonding, Grandpa Elber breaks out his magic for what he calls “the ultimate empathy exercise.”
Yeah, magic. Real magic. My grandpa is an actual wizard, and no, I don’t know why he isn’t out saving the world or something. He claims this is his legacy, his gift to the family. And the gift? A body swap. Each of us trades bodies with another family member for the week to “better understand” their perspective. Sounds wholesome in theory, right? Sure. Except it comes with rules.
The first rule: you can only swap with someone of the same gender. According to Grandpa, this is because “genders have different energies” or some other magical nonsense he uses to justify it. The second rule: while in someone else’s body, you must act like that person. It’s considered bad form—borderline taboo, even—to behave “out of character.” The goal is to fully immerse yourself and live as them for the week.
This is the part that fucking sucks for me.
Growing up, I naturally got shoved into the women’s group. It didn’t matter that my hair was short or that I always would hang out with my male cousins all the time. When swap week rolled around, I was guaranteed to end up in the most hyper-feminine body available. Cousin Leah, with her long curly hair and pastel sundresses. Aunt Beth, whose shoe collection was a stiletto-filled nightmare. Once, I even got swapped into Great Aunt Carol, whose hobbies include flower arranging and oversharing about her cats.
It was torture. Absolute, unfiltered dysphoria. Butvery year, I’d smile through gritted teeth as relatives gushed about “seeing life from a different perspective,” counting the minutes until I could escape back to my flawed, but familiar, body.
But this year was different.
Nine months ago, I started taking T and told my family I wanted to use he/him pronouns. While their reactions ranged from awkward to mildly confused, they mostly rolled with it. And over time, my voice got deeper voice, the angles of my face sharpened a bit, and I started carrying myself more like a guy. Sure, I wasn’t "there" yet, whatever that meant: I hadn’t had top surgery, and my voice still cracked when I tried to lower it too much. But for this year’s reunion, I was cautiously optimistic that there was a chance—however slim—that I might finally swap with a guy.
The thought alone made my pulse race. Grandpa said he had no idea what would happen, that the magic would sort itself out. But if it worked—if the spell actually recognized who I was, not who I’d been forced to be—it would be life-changing. For once, I might not have to endure a week of floral prints and makeup. For once, I might get to experience a body that offered a glimpse into my future as a man.
---
On the evening of the swap, the family gathered in the villa’s massive living room, the air thick with incense from whatever mystical preparation Grandpa had cooked up. I sat cross-legged on the floor, trying not to look too eager. Across the room, Uncle Marco—rugged, broad-shouldered, and looking like he belonged on the cover of Men’s Health—was chatting with Cousin Dylan, who somehow made even a hoodie and jeans look effortlessly cool. If the magic did swap me with a guy, I hoped for one of them.
Grandpa raised his hands, muttered something in an unrecognizable language, and completed the spell. A wave of dizziness hit me like a truck, and everything went dark.
When I came to, the world felt... different.
Looking down, I saw strong, freckled arms with pale skin peppered by coppery freckles. The faint lines of veins ran beneath the surface, threading down to hands that felt capable, solid, real. My breath quickened. A quick glance at the mirror across the room confirmed what I already realized: I was in Theo’s body.
Theo. My cousin Theo was the only other openly gay member of our family. He was always unapologetically himself, and—if I was being honest—so effortlessly masculine it made my chest ache.
I tried not to stare too long in the mirror across the room—tried not to make it obvious—but I couldn’t help but take in the details. My hands shifted tentatively, brushing over the flat expanse of his chest. I could feel the firm definition of his pecs under my fingertips, the strength that lay just beneath the skin. A shiver ran through me as I slid my hands up to his shoulders, savoring the way they tapered down to his arms. My fingers traced his biceps, squeezing lightly, marveling at the power there.
My throat tightened as I flexed one arm, watching the muscle shift and ripple under the skin. For the first time in my life, I looked at a reflection that didn’t feel foreign. This was it. This was who I was supposed to be.
I feel a stirring in my pants, an undeniable reaction to the overwhelming experience of feeling up my own muscles. For the first time in my life, I have a dick. Hesitantly, I let my hand drift lower, subtly pressing against the fabric of Theo’s jeans. The weight of it, the reality of it, is electric.
Across the room, Grandpa—now in Dylan’s body—continues explaining the rules of the swap. His deep voice fills the air, and I catch myself half-listening. My attention flickers to Dylan’s slumped form, unlucky enough to be swapped with Grandpa for the third year in a row. Poor guy. I thought the swaps were supposed to be random, but maybe Grandpa has a knack for landing in his sexy body every summer.
I glance over at my former body. Dysphoria is etched into his—my—features. Theo’s jaw is tight, his hands clutching at my chest as if trying to make sense of the reality he’s been thrown into. It hits like a punch to the gut. I know that feeling all too well, and it sucks to see it written so clearly on my face. Worse still, it’s a stark reminder that I don’t fully look like a guy yet. Not the way I want to.
Grandpa’s voice booms as he finishes his speech. “Let’s all have a fun week!” he declares, his tone lighthearted but commanding.
I turn back to the mirror, drawn to my reflection like a magnet. My smirk curls naturally, unbidden. For once, the face looking back at me feels real, tangible, mine. And damn, does it feel good. Fuck I hope this week never ends
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KAMO CHOSO: ❝ MORAL SUPPORT. ❞
choso would never openly admit that his biggest fantasy was having you as his under the desk support while he's gaming.
what your boyfriend didn't know is that you had to control yourself from begging him to let you give him head every time you saw him playing his stupid little video games.
at least not until you reached your fucking limit.
if you didn't know your boyfriend well, you would think he was teasing you. by the way he spread his legs across the chair, or the way he groaned at the monitor, throwing his arms around the headrest.
and it really didn't help that he the only thing he was wearing was his matching pair of hello kitty sweatpants he'd gotten for you two.
"sorry, baby, just finishing up this round," choso said as he you got crawled out of his bed and walked towards him. he didn't look at you, maybe if he did he would've known what was coming.
"don't worry, cho, i just wanted to show you my support," you purred into your boyfriend's ear, dragging your nails (that he paid for) down his neck, making his whole body shiver.
you continued to drag your nails down his arms, his naked torso, as you placed yourself between his legs, under the tight space under his desk. choso's eyes followed your every movement like he could not believe what was happening. the clicking sound coming from his keyboard grew more and more sporadic.
"what are you—argh," choso quickly covered the microphone on his headset, just in time to muffle his whimpering voice as you brought your tongue to his abdomen, making your way down his happy trail. "baby, i-i'm on a call with the—ngh—the boys."
"then we better be quiet, huh?" you replied, before placing your parted lips on top of his bulge. choso bucked his hips at the slight touch, making you giggle. even through his sweatpants, you could feel how hard and ready he was for you, even though you had barely touched him. so cute. "can you be good for me, hm?"
he couldn't take his eyes off of you, completely mesmerized. his mic was still covered but you could hear his friends' voice coming from his headset.
"bro, you still there?"
"are we still playing?"
"the fuck, choso?!"
"y-yeah, 'm here," choso finally replied, doing his best to ignore the fact that the hottest woman alive was making his biggest fantasy come true at that very moment.
you stared at him through your lashes. he looked so damned adorable when he was concentrated like that. the sound of clicking coming from his keyboard and mouse was relentless—it made you wonder if that had anything to do with how dexterous he was at making you feel good with his hands.
you pulled the band of his sweatpants down, releasing his cock, which spun freely to your face. you felt choso choke as you grabbed him, slowly starting to pump his cock, eyeing it like it was a piece of candy. you looked up at your boyfriend, hungry eyes meeting his half lidded gaze and flushed cheeks. you could see how hard he was trying not to moan for you, sucking his breath through gritted teeth, trembling under your touch.
you made sure to not break eye contact as you took him in your mouth, letting out a moan from deep in your throat. choso could swear that his heart stopped for a second.
"you good, choso?" you recognized yuji's voice.
"y-yeah, all good." choso managed to reply before muting.
he looked down at you, his beautiful girlfriend, loudly slurping on his cock, barely containing your moans. he watched you as you popped his cock out of your mouth like a lollipop, just to suck on his balls, pumping his cock with your hand, while you layed your face on his thigh, staring up at him.
"so good f-for me, cho," you hiccuped mid sentence, you sounded so cock drunk and looked so fucked out that choso almost came right there.
he couldn't take it anymore.
choso could barely hear his friends yelling at him for leaving the round, he couldn't care less. he lowered his headset before grabbing you by your hair, desperately fucking your mouth. the perfect gagging noises you made blurred his mind, till all he could think about was how fucking perfect you looked with your pretty face stuffed with his cock.
he held your head in place as he came undone and watched you swallow every drop of his cum before collapsing on his chair, audibly whimpering. choso ran his fingers languidly through your hair as you licked him clean.
"thank you, baby. i love you so much," he mumbled before pulling you in for a kiss.
#calicocita#���✩⸝⸝ jjk#ੈ♡⸝⸝ choso#choso kamo#jjk choso#jujutsu kaisen choso#jujustsu kaisen x reader#choso x reader#choso smut#choso x you#jjk smut#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#mommy k!nk
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write more about roxy getting jealous of some girl eyeing rafe at a party, what happens. I want details of the angst and smut please and thank you
RAFE ‘ND ROXY 💫
hi so i actually hate how i wrote in this but we live laugh n love
roxy n rafe weren’t together. as of now, if you asked them a week ago the answer would have been different. they were currently, in the off stage of their off n on relationship. however, there was a party tonight.
neither roxy nor rafe ever missed a party. usually they would go together, really. but tonight they weren’t together. it wasn’t gonna be like that. but, they both still got ready n went. it was a pool party, a kook one.
roxy was praying that rafe wouldn’t show up. that he would be too upset at home about her, too high to even function. however, pulling into the function, he was the first thing she saw. she rolled her eyes, takin another hit off the passed around blunt in the car.
she was pissed. she didn’t wanna see him. she wanted to get drunk, n forget about the breakup. so, that’s exactly what she attempted to do. she sat by the pool, takin shot after shot of patron. frankly, she wouldn’t mind a good fuck too.
but everybody knew not to talk to roxy if rafe was there. not if they didn’t want to get kicked out n a hit out on them. roxy was probably 6 shots deep when she observed the party around them. most were out of the water, playin beer pong or smoking.
however, her eyes unwillingly landed directly on rafe. again. then, slowly moved down to look at the bitch standing right in front of him. she scrunched her face up in disgust, looking the girl up and down. she wasn’t cute, far from it. her tracks were showing, n she looked like a 2 dollar whore. if she was just a lil bit drunker, she’d probably hit her.
she watched them closely, tensing up the minute she touched his chest. she raised her brows, not even believing what she saw. she snorted to herself, she knew what rafe was doing. he probably flirted with her first to be petty. she downed another shot, chasing it with a lime before standing up.
she made her way over there, standing to the side of rafe with a smug smile on her face. one that looked genuinely amused at his attempt to make her jealous. rafe looked at her, obviously irritated. she gave him a look, obviously testing him. to see what would do. however, she knew deep down exactly who he’d pick.
he sucked his teeth, looking roxy up and down before nodding his head. he followed her into the party, her takin him to a bedroom found in the large house. he shut the door behind them, the music muffling.
she turned around, looking at him before planting a harsh slap to his cheek. “you fuckin’ stupid, rafe? you just embarrassed me in front of that whole party.” he rolled his eyes. he knew what she meant.
everyone knew him and roxy were like this. so for him to talk to another girl at that party? he made her look stupid. “i didn’t do shit. she came up to me.” she laughed, he was seriously comical. “no she didn’t, you dumb fuck. you’re so annoying.” he took a breath at her words.
“can you just shut up? you’re overreacting, rox. seriously.” she raised her brows, rolling her eyes. “no. rafe, i seriously fuckin’ hate you. everything about you.” her words registered in his mind, and he didn’t think before grabbin the back of her head n planting a wet kiss on her lips.
she tried to push him off her, before he held her wrists together infront of her. he picked her up n carried her to the bed in the room, while planting kisses down her throat. he laid her down, trailing his kisses to her tummy.
she sucked in a breath. “rafe— stop. i fucking hate you— ohhh, fuck.” he planted a kiss on her bikini covered clit, moving it to the side to lick a long stripe up her slit. she was truly upset with him, really. however, she was also truly horny.
he sucked her clit into his mouth for a minute, releasing it harshly. he prompted a serious of moans from her, before she spoke. “i’m so done with you, deadass. fuck you.”
he nodded against her folds— he was so used to those words. the same ones he’s heard so many times from her lips. he moved his body upwards, crawling on top of her. he untied the bikini top adorning her skin, hands planting on her tits.
“quit, just fuckin— god, just hurry the fuck up nd put it in already.” she moaned, watching as he grinned n unbuckled his belt. “thought you ‘fuckin’ hated me’, huh? now you want it?” she slapped him again, as he pushed inside of her, both of them letting out a moan.
he thrusted in n out of her, before speaking. “i hate you too, y’know that? you’re so fuckin— god, insufferable. i fuckin’ hate you.” she ignored his words back, wrapping her legs around his waist. she moaned, his head hanging by her ear.
“nnmph— i’m gonna cum, ray. fuck, right there.” she whimpered, his tip hitting her cervix repeatedly. he nodded. “yeah, i know, rox. i know.” he grunted, before cumming in her as she came, the fluids combining.
he stopped his movements, staying inside of her— sweaty, sticky skin becoming one. labored breathing filled up the room, as he moved his position next to her. she swallowed, glancing at the figure next to her.
“that girl wasn’t even cute.” she spoke, gauging his reaction. he nodded, rolling his eyes. “yeah. i know that, roxianna.” she sat up, leaning back on her hands. she got off the bed, him watching her. she tied her bikini back on, slippin her sandals on too.
“this doesn’t fuckin’ mean we’re back together, rafe. just— stop talking to those random, slutty ass girls.” he nodded. he looked disappointed, that she left so fast. maybe a part of him that didn’t find her so annoying felt like that.
she looked him up and down once more. “i still fuckin’ hate you, cameron.” she spoke, before turning around n leaving the room. and maybe she did, really. but that didn’t make a difference.
she’d still go back to him every single time. so this game, of seeing who can do and say the worst to eachother didn’t matter. they both would somehow end up in eachothers beds again.
n she would always find her way back.
#pintrestgrl#anon ask#obx#rafe cameron#rafe coded#rafe obx#rafe cameron scenarios#obx au#foxy roxy 💫#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron smut#rafe outer banks#rafe imagine#rafe smut#outerbanks rafe#rafe#rafe fanfiction#rafe fic#rafe cameron thoughts
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Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x Anastasia Romana (OC) NSFW
TW:
NSFW. Minors do not interact
Mention of drugs
Talk about being a prostitute
Anastasia had been led in bed, almost passed out when she’d gotten a call off none other than Simon Riley.
He happened to be her favourite customer, the one man she looked forward to servicing. He was a normal guy really, had the energy of a middle aged white man despite only being in his early thirties.
She knew he was in the military however due to secrecy, she had no clue what branch he was in. She didn’t push or question either. Just did her job, took her money and went home.
She’d arrived at his place around midnight, why he’d called her late at night was beyond her but she didn’t mind. As long as she still got paid.
He’d opened the door, wearing a grey top that showed his muscles straining…it was clearly a tight fit.
She made her way inside when invited, Simon wasted no time pressing his lips to hers instantly. He was eager to get going. Anastasia however, pulled away and raised a hand
“Money first” Anastasia said. Simon just nodded and shoved a crumpled stack of bills in her pocket before kissing her again, his large hands finding her waist and pulling her closer to him. His lips moved from hers and down to her neck, sucking a hickey into the sensitive flesh, his hands began wondering, inching closer to her thighs. Anastasia gasped, her already sensitive body shaking as she reached to take his shirt off, her bony hands running down his chest and towards his crotch, where she was desperate to free his hard cock.
“On your knees love”
Simon breathed, pushing Anastasia down so she was face level with his crotch
“Open up” He pulled his cock free, letting his boxers drop to the floor. Anastasia opened her mouth, letting Simon push his dick into her mouth, she wrapped her mouth around it, sucking hard since she knew Simon didn’t like teasing. She hollowed her cheeks out, moaning around his length as she sucked and licked. Which caused instant pleasurable vibrations for Simon.
Simon started thrusting into her mouth, his hands tangling in her curly brown hair.
He only lasted a few more minutes, thrusting frantically into her mouth until without warning he shot sticky hot cum down her throat.
Anastasia pulled off him and wiped her mouth before standing up.
Simon clearly wanted a quick fuck, because all he did was bend her over the couch, ask her if she was okay and that this was okay before shoving his cock inside her cunt.
He thrusted in and out, slowly at first before getting faster, his hands gripping her hips punishingly. His cock moved in and out of her cunt at lighting speed, the sound of flesh slapping against flesh and moans filling the room.
Simon soon draped himself over her back, letting out a guttural moan as he came inside her.
He pulled out of her, catching his breath as he pulled his boxers back up and wiped some sweat from his forehead.
Anastasia stayed bent over the couch for a little bit before standing back up and putting her clothes back on.
She didn’t say anything to Simon at first, they never really spoke after their sessions.
“Doing much after this?”
Simon asked awkwardly
“Drugs probably.”
Anastasia said bluntly, smoothing her hair out before checking she had the money Simon gave her. She cast a lingering glance at Simon, her blue eyes searching his before she smiled.
Simon smiled back before turning away
“Bye Anastasia. Til I call again.”
#simon ghost riley#simon riley x reader#ghost x reader#simon riley#simon riley x oc#call of duty x reader#call of duty oc#call of duty#captain price#kate laswell#john soap mactavish#kyle gaz garrick#keegan p russ#konig x reader#konig cod
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wowowow finished the second season of shadow and bone and i'm soooooo mad about the weird fucking ableist nosedive inej and kaz's relationship took. this show spent so much time establishing how much they care for each other, and when kaz finally manages to bring himself to tell inej that he wants her to stay with him she's like, 'ok but if you can't fuck me because you are riddled with trauma then i don't want you tho???' true love. super cool.
and like i get it, sex and physical touch are a huge part of relationships and intimacy, but i am begging on my hands and knees to please handle this delicate subject with some modicum of care and respect if you're gonna depict it. within the span of like 2 minutes of screen time inej tears into kaz for something that's so painful and humiliating and isolating to him. nothing like someone you love and trust turning around and telling you that actually you can fuck off if you won't magically will away your trauma/disability for their sake.
HOWEVER i know in my heart of hearts that inej wouldn't do this. it's just bad, lazy writing. actually, when kaz says, 'stay with me, i want you,' inej would not do what they had her do on the show. i absolutely know she'd be like, 'awesome, sweet, hell yeah!' and would sew them both full coverage leather gimp suits or whatever. they'd kiss through plastic wrap 'pushing daisies' style. hell if she really was actually like, 'i need sex tho,' i know they'd work out some kind of arrangement where she brings hot ppl home and kaz watches them fuck and they both get off on that.
and i definitely know that the devout and devoted inej we come to know throughout the show would never be such a cruel motherfucker as to CARESS KAZ'S GLOVED HAND and then look him dead in the eye and ask, 'and how will you have me?' followed by gut punch after gut punch about all the ways in which his PAIN AND SUFFERING impedes on her ability to fuck him raw.
the show was so weak for taking an easy, boring, and fucked up way out of a situation that could have been such an empowering and refreshing take on disability and intimacy. and they went to such length to be like, 'kaz is disabled but that doesn't stop him from being a badass!' cool. cool cool cool. but wait actually he's not allowed to work through his trauma -- sorry! 'armour'! cause he's choosing to put on his crippling disgust with bodily contact! yeah that's how it works! -- on his own terms and actually booooooo forever alone time for kaz cause he can't fuck!!!! ugh. blech. yuuuuuuck i hate it.
#shadow and bone#i haven't read the books i've just seen the show so maybe it's different there?#but still#they still made it happen in the show and that fucking sucks
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a strange trend in my favorite characters I realize is that I tend to heavily gravitate toward somewhat obscure, antagonistic forces
#shoutout to the multiple months when I was young when I was obsessed with flatwoman#‘who the fuck is flatwoman’ heh. well. you ever watch the pbs kids show peg + cat?#she appeared in like two episodes and let’s just say. I would’ve died for her as a kid#and yup ok you guessed it this trend continued with my boy pumpkin daddy#what thehell is wrong with that guy and more important question why is he my absolute favorite character of all time#I’m not even talking strictly about PDBC here alright? in that I have full control over him#in ROOTS? oh boy unstoppable force of nature someone Actually euthanize him or something he’s going to commit heinous crimes if left alone#he’s So bizarre mind if I just talk about that before going back to sleep? his morals are all over the place#‘this poor abandoned child. her mother should be ashamed of doing this to her. anyway let’s kidnap her for money’#and then he fucking pretends that he didn’t remember that happening#not that it DIDNT happen but that he just doesn’t remember it??.okay go off king??#at this point I don’t even know if he was lying he might just have Alzheimer’s or something he’s gettin kinda old#also Alzheimer’s is the worst word ever I have to look it up to spell it every time ffs so annoying#also worth mentioning that he almost got himself killed in a pursuit of someone’s money#and then not even a YEAR later he was back at it again trying to scam the SAME people lol GIVE IT A REST#I didn’t type lol this is travesty istg I didn’t type lol there there’s a lol ghost on the loose#he needs to be put down or something#and why the hell is he actually one of the nicest parents like huh?..?man what??#yeah this is my little science experiment I made solely for money. i love her she’s beautiful she’s awesome#my brother in Christ pick a side are you horrible or not#ok also wait that reminds me. it was unintentionally implied that he wasn’t evil once#I won’t go into it for the sake of time but. raises eyebrow. what the hell do you mean#at least I think it was unintentional. it’s still weird to me and I never bothered asking#anyway I should probably go back to sleep I have n appointment in like. two hours. sigh#yayyyy I love characters who suck!!! 🥰🥰🥰 pop off you asshole king and or queen
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Ykno the suckiest thing about being broken up with for someone else is that like. Well I'm doing generally fine, all things considered, but I Am kinda sad thinking about the things I've lost and all the casual affection that I can't have now.
But she's out there having all the affection she wants from her coworker, and it's just like. Damn this feels so skewed and SO unfair.
#speculation nation#and then U add in the fact that the girl she broke up with me for is already dating someone else (poly sort of situation)#and im just like. WHYYYYY did she break up with me instead of trying to negotiate poly???#she was gonna at first but when i expressed concern about poly given her obvious communication problems about it#then she dropped me like a hot coal. like sorry i wasnt about to let myself be stood up and ignored for basically a whole day#just to accept u trying to negotiate poly. like What?????#anyways i may have a bit of a history with being a bit of an asshole and breaking up with them#but at LEAST ive never broken up with anyone to immediately start dating someone else#and at LEAST ive broken up with them in person and not over text!!! the fuck?????#i keep alternating between 'surprisingly okay with it all' and 'maybe a little sad' and 'absolutely fucking LIVID'#and i keep wanting to yell at her more but i already said quite a lot of things. so id just be repeating myself#and at that point id just be a vitriolic piece of shit. which i try not to be.#so im letting her live in peace while i continue to be So Pissed about it and it just sucks man lmfao#why do i gotta be the bigger person fr. i even apologized for the hurtful things i was saying in anger. literally in that same conversation.#and she gets to pull this stunt and walk free and spend so much time with her new 'love' ignoring the world etc etc#honestly i hope it fails miserably for her. bc sure theres a chance it works out but every single part of this is impulsive and So Stupid.#and even tho my ex agreed with me when i told her it was INSANE. she was just like 'i have to' like OKAY????#jesus fucking christmas she's revealed a side to me that i really hadnt seen before.#so i hope it fails and i hope she tells me about it. i hope she owns up to her mistakes. for my own satisfaction.#but i have 0 intention on ever taking her back. because what the fuck????#i may be a flawed individual with plenty of problems. but i still have basic fucking dignity. and i am NOT accepting this back in my life.#and god damn her friend is moving into the unit across from mine for this coming year#and i may have to see my ex sometimes bc of it 😭😭😭#the friend seemed generally level headed tho. idk if i happen across him & he doesnt avoid me maybe i'll ask him what he thinks of this#bc she was treating me with such love and affection showing me off to all her friends. and then she drops me like a fucking coal.#i wouldnt say i made friends with them myself but we were at least friendly. so i doubt theyd have a good opinion of her for this.#so would the friend loyalty take precedence? or would he be willing to chat with me and confirm Yeah what the fuck?#bc if i had a friend who did this same exact thing id be side-eyeing them SO hard.#id support them bc theyre my friend but i would also be like 'hey uh Why did you do that. that was pretty awful of u you know that right'#& itd also make me more cautious of them too. for being Able to drop someone so suddenly lol.
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feeling despair i don’t know how to put into words. im trying to figure out why im like this and how i got to be this way but i can’t even do it bc of the way i am and what im like. if that makes sense. like the problem prevents me from fixing the problem bc i can’t get to the root of it. despair despair despair
#purrs#delete later#basically i can’t internalize anything about myself. i can’t internalize that i am talented smart strong whatever and i can’t internalize#evidence that i matter and belong and am loved. i take in this evidence constsntly and it just evaporates. and then it’s like i have none of#it at all and im starving and shaking and dying and howling like a wretched little animal. and i live in this constant defaulstate of like..#feeling worthless and alone and utterly empty and like everything in my life is a dream or something. and in feeling that way and being#quite literally incapable of having emotional object permanence.. i actually make that situation real for myself. i make myself alone and#wretched. i isolate myself and shut down and don’t let myself take up the space i can. and it’s just awful. it’s unfixabke.#i just suck it all dry. i deny myself to myself and to everyone else. and idk what made me like this bc i don’t think i always used to be#this way w depression and depersonalization or whatever the fuck dsm 6 type shit i have going on. but i can’t internalize anything about#myself and my life and have no desire / willpower to look back beyond a certain point and really analyze and probe to figure out what#happened to me to make me like this so i can heal the core wound. soim just constantly in wretched tortured panicking creature mode. awesome#this cry for help brought to you by: my sister guilt tripping me into doing her laundry + my brother showing me his beautiful music +#realizing that unlike redacted i have not documented every part of my life and have no access to early childhood artifacts that would reveal#anything about me and that it does n’t even matter / isn’t special anyway. i love being normal 😎🫶🏻‼️#at least i haven’t been dissociating as badly about work stuff lately but. that’s definitely still a thing too so. what if my whole life is#just the wrong timeline i wasn’t supposed to be in and nothing is actually real. lawl 😳#this is a really awesome time for my therapist to be going on a monthlong honeymoon btw 😍 she deserves it so much but omg im dying already
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my favourite headcanon for glass sorenson is that she came down with farm station and watched them murder luke right in front of her eyes (or kidnap him or something cause i love tragic lovers but she deserves to be happy) and so she’s one of the first people to join pike’s militia and turn vengeful, and her best friend wells (he lives too cause this is my canon now) is trying to get through to her but she won’t hear it cause all she wants is justice and to get her oldest friend clarke griffin out of polis and away from harm (they’re friends too fight me on this i dare you)
(also sorry about the tags i didn’t know i had that rant in me 😭😭)
#the 100#the 100 novels#kass morgan#glass sorenson#please explain to me why she wasn’t in the show#actually dont i dont want excuses 😭😭#shes my babyyyyy#and this is my favourite headcanon for her#i think that after everything that happened to her she deserved to stab someone#i also think having someone explicitly in the younger main cast who was affected by the farm station massacre would help highlight why they#refused to trust grounders and wanted vengeance for what happened to them#because it feels like the show was going for a whole black and white youre wrong thing#which sucked#cause you literally hear hannah and pike say that the CHILDREN who were just PLAYING IN THE SNOW were the first to die#and then the writers are like but how DARE they want retribution#also im sorry but lexa was so stupid to think the ice queens body would be enough#everyone was so for jus drein jus daun but when they demanded the grounders responsible it was literally never adressed#and they didn’t even see the ice queen die#lexa just wanted to hand them her body and be like okay its done now stop causing problems#also she did literal shit to help because a whole ass SEASON later some of farm station are still alive being held as SLAVES by the ones#who attacked them#and if the main group didnt go after the ship for ita resources they would have died their in praimfaya or died through the labour#like please explain to me why the writers just brushed this aside and then made BELAMY the guy who lost someone he loved and was manipulate#the villain of that season like the fuck????????#not saying they had a right to go around massacring villages im not an idiot that was too far but the people who are like oh they were#murdering children how could they 😔😔#like the grounders didnt kill children FIRST and get NO FUCKING CONSEQUENCES pisses me off to no end#also im really supposed to see skaikru as villains fot wanting vengeance when literally 99.99% of the grounders we meet wanted it and the#ones who didnt DIED for chosing peace because the rest refused to abadon violence like titus and lincoln literally say lexa would DIE for#wanting peace and changing her ways cause her people would MURDER her and yet skaikru were evil for wanting justice
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Yet another beautiful day to have the Maxwel tag blocked (can't see half of the posts in the Wendy tags)
#rat rambles#starve posting#maxwell posters have lost any semblance of tolerance from me ages ago Ive yet to meet a maxwell fan who's just like a normal person#and to clarify I actually do like maxwel as I am the number one just some asshole whos in too deep enjoyer#but dear god are ppl just absolutely incapable of being normal abt this man and everyone around him#and even beyond that ppl just do not get this man like please he is indeed interesting but not because of some 'retconed redemption'#like pls we can live in a world where he is not an irridemable monster and is in fact just some guy while also still being a flawed person#like the fact that he is so deeply flawed in ways that he never actually properly adressed and challenged is the interesting thing to me#like look at me. he went through horrible shit he didnt deserve. that didnt inherently make him a better or worse person#it just made him a more miserable person#and he didnt escape because of some change of heart or character development#and afterwards he teamed up with wilson because of necessity#I do think on some level he genuinely cares abt the other survivors and he does have genuine regret for how things turned out#but again those things dont inherently mean he moved past the flaws that got him here it just means he has the ability to recognize that#shit sucks and that he wish none of it happened#its why encore is one of my favorite animations from a character perspective because it shows some juicy charlie and maxwell stuff#mainly it shows both that charlie has not forgiven his ass and is manipulating him and that maxwell is still susceptible to it#which isnt a sigh of them rolling back development it's just a sign that maxwell is easy to manipulate with the right cards#which adds up considering his past and his present very well in my opinion#this is a man whos historically always ran away from his problems and is always on the hunt for a sense of control#and charlie tapped into both that and his ever present guilt#its in fact very unsurprising and not out of place for him to fall for that sort of manipulation#and it also makes for a great set up for the inevitable betrayal from charlie as maxwell is hit by the harsh reality of his situation#and that whole situation would lead to some yummy tasty parallels when charlie inevitably gets betrayed herself (I hope)#the ways charlie and maxwel are so similar yet so different facinates me deeply I love how much charlie doesnt realize shes kinda fucked#I want her to be betrayed so hard and left in the dust with no ground to stand on I want the rug pulled out from under her feet#her composition comes from her confidence in the necessity of her actions and the moral superiority she feels over maxwell#so having her sense of superiority be revoked would make for a super fascinating dynamic as she tries to justify the situation in her head#I wanna see her siral and then maybe change her pronouns idk
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):
#there's all this talk in the show about the power he had over people but none about the women who had power over him#note im not saying that it excuses his shit either im just saying the eshow never really holds the women accountable#as a woman that annoys me#esp as one with a mom who has often made me feel worthless#i also found the writers to get way too insecure in s5 about how people viewed their main character that they felt the need to double down#give mc a sympathic backstory and will feel bad for him what were they expecting?#heck i felt kinda bad for beatrice and i dont hate her but her dad sucked you cant help but pity her esp as an old lady#angela diaz#scary women#she was so damn convincing#for a show about accountabiity its justall on one mans shoulder and it just doesnt feel like it was that fair shrugs#dont believe me?#ana his publist sexually assaults BJ#this is ignored and brushed off as if it never happened#beatrice his biggest abuser next to his father is given the sad old lady treatment that he acutally ends up being kind too#diane fucks pb who is with pickles and is mostly absolved of any wrong doing on her end#pc agrees to work with vance gets bj to a doc that gives him the opiums and does nothing to stop him from hurting gina#angela is gay the whole time and still fires herb then berates and offers a man who is mentally unstable more alchhol#it also felt tacked on in ep 10 of s5 to me like it came of super insecure#oh he def did shitty sshit that is unforgiveable but it felt like they were just throwing a bunc of random x//a/s to double down
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be so serious with me. do you think that shared trauma caused by interdimensional violence and death and government conspiracies and survivor’s guilt would seriously be outweighed by a petty high school breakup.
#be SO serious.#like. are you kidding. are you joking.#you'd isolate nancy from the other teens. two of her only living friends. bc of a stupid breakup in a dwindling failing unfortunately#incompatible relationship. you think that's like. a good take.#i'm personally a fan of steve and nancy weird awkward best friend soulmatism. they gave it a go it didnt work they still had fun chemistry#and they have all that shared experience.#i'm pretending i dont see s4's Moments#abby talks#i just got hit with this bc of a gifset of steve robin and nancy and the little gremlin in my brain went#oh people would Hate this. because god forbid nancy be anywhere near the golden duo. but they're STUPID#steve still admires nancy i think!!!! that's his first love!!!! and they made up in season 2 and so much has happened since???#i dont think he needed to say I may be a shit boyfriend because yeah no he wasnt. but he was not compatible for nancy#dealing with her trauma and her need for acknowledgment in barb's death. and her guilt. that's not a fault of either of them it just didnt#work. that's just. whoopsies oopsies it's almost like they needed to show an incompatibility there to eventually move her on to jonathan#which is so reductive and stupid and i wish she was just alone but whatever#and REGARDLESS of that. she is not responsible for his feelings of insecurity!!! she had a drunken rant and yeah that sucks it was harsh#but god everyone has their moments#another YOU PEOPLE ARE WEIRD!!!!!! moment. try fucking thinking for once#you don't have to like nancy but coming up with all these absurd ass excuses and centering her entire character arc around how she#interacts with men. oh i could kill you.#btw whatever i dont hate jon and nancy and it's a story and it's fine but god she could use time to just be with herself
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nothing to see here
#ok plz i wanna rant about how the new season of good omens is making me lose faith in humanity#girl tell me how ive trudged through 4 episodes of this season and i still dont know what the damn hell is going onnnnnn#every time i think we're getting somewhere with the 'story' the show slams the brakes to let me know that there're gay people on screen#does the coffee shop chick ever apologize to the record store chick bc i cant staaaand their romance.#like record store lady. girl. this isnt banter shes just straight up dissing your passion and life's work.#im scared to finish the season bc i just KNOW theyre gonna pull the whole 'i made u leave ur toxic partner now date me immediately' trope#ok so story beats aside my other gripe is how contrived the queer representation is in this show#i am a bi woman! my reaction to seeing wlw on screen should be 'yay! im happy theyre together' and not 'ugh this shit again?'#and also with az and crowley! what happened to their chemistry from the first season???#like on the one hand the whole 'bickering like an old married couple' schtick is lovely. but. theyre just faffing about most of the time!#remember the first season? when these characters had agency? and a semblance of intuition?#i am convinced that the majority of the characters in this season couldnt find their way out of a paper bag#i get theres a whole memory loss plot device thing happening. but it feels like Gabriel's cluelessness is like fucking infectious or smthn#i feel like an idiot for assuming that the characters i knew from the first season will be just as competent in this season. they arent!#i hated the whole 'continued' story in the wwii era. i feel like it was a pathetic ploy at giving mark gatiss more needless screentime#did they think people would find the nazi zombies amusing or something? why are we playing this off as a joke?#just admit you dont know what to do with the story and move onnnnnnnn#im gonna finish the season bc i feel like im owed the scene of david tennant sucking face with michael sheen.#itll be like reparations for having to slough through the rest of this nothing burger of a story jesuuuuuussss#ok rant over#good omens critical
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You probably already tried that but just in case..., have you tried to put yourself in private in the parameters (as in, not being able to be found when people write your name in the search bar) ? I know that for some people it had worked to stay like that for a few days when they had lots of bot followers like you do. Worth the try I guess. Good luck!
ah ty anon. i haven't done this yet mainly bc i post gifs and when i had my blog set to private/non-searchable, my gifsets did not show up in the tags. that was a few years ago so it's possible that's not an issue anymore but i'm wary for that reason. if i weren't posting gifsets literally every day i'd probably go that route.
for now, i've been tracking these spam bots and reporting all of them so that i could send this information to support staff (which i just did this evening!). i didn't want to send a generic report without any metrics to back it up bc i didn't want them to brush it off as a non-issue. but 900+ spam followers in 10 days is frankly absurd and hopefully they can't ignore it.
thanks for the suggestion!! if tumblr staff doesn't come back with a plan or some other suggestion, i'll probably resort to this.
#ask#anonymous#it would suck bc my experience when i made myself un-searchable before#(which i mainly wanted bc i didn't want people to be able to find me on google not realizing it would make me un-searchable on tumblr)#was that even when i posted gifsets with all the appropriate tags the posts never showed up in the tags#which meant that unless a particular gifset escaped my circle of followers i never got much engagement#to be honest! i still don't get a lot of engagement numbers wise#but the terror fandom is small and the engagement i do get is enthusiastic and i love when someone stumbles across my gifs in the tags#and i don't want that to not happen just bc tumblr can't fucking sort its shit out re:spam bots#ALSO i followed up with tumblr staff regarding the broken saved tags feature which i have been emailing them about since august#so. you know. no quick fixes here!
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sad. bitter realization that i am still haunted by people of the past, got recc'd a show a guy i knew really liked and would recommend to me. and i figured i would at some point, but now even the thought makes me irrationally. something. unsure. uncomfortable? bitter? upset? overwhelmed maybe. i want to watch it, but i can't really tear two and two apart. just feels like a punch to the face
#just a little bitter about it yk#i dont wanna feel affected but i do#the whole show reminds me of the guy and it just makes me irrationally angry and uncomfortable to even look at#how does that even happen man#sorry cyberpunk edgerunners you do not deserve to be caught in the crossfire#no doubt its a very good show. i just know its gonna open a pandoras box of shit associated with that guy#its immature and silly but ill work through it#just thinkin about it. fuck man#half of my insecurities came from that guy tearing me a new one for some fuckin reason#hed be an asshole to me and id LET him. and i just. let him. whyd i do that#he always made me feel stupid and less than and he never cared abt anything i said and nothing i cared about mattered to him and i figured i#i did just figure i was stupid and i should even be grateful that he wanted to be friends with me even if he hated who i was#and im not like that anymore but i will admit he made me feel like the most incompetent useless piece of shit and i still do but im getting#better abt it. he fucking sucked#it is a whole box of unresolved feelings
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