#they may as well be strangers to me atp

[alaskan-wallflower]

apparently my cousins who i haven’t spoken to in years because of some things they’ve done (really fucking bad things) are coming over tomorrow and i didn’t fucking know until now and i’m like freaking out because first off i had plans for tomorrow and second off i haven’t seem them in literal years and they’re just coming over and i don’t know what the fuck or why the fuck so…

[januaryembrs]

Tea!

Hey, I'm the anon who requested the drabble of bugsy realizing her feelings for spencer. Can you write a drabble based on what happened after spencer saw bugsy and the guy in her apartment?? I found the ending to have been quite abrupt and am genuinely curious as to how things were between them after that (I'm a sucker for angst). Hopefully you aren't also planning a BONUS chapter on this 😭😭 if so, then I'll just shut up bcs I'm actually just spoiling shit atp.

THEN STRANGERS AGAIN | Spencer Reid x Prentiss!Reader [drabble]

description: Spencer thinks he and Bugsy may have invented Murphy's Law. Everything that can go wrong, will go wrong and has gone wrong.

length: 1.1k

warnings: some small hints at mature content, but no actual stuff. angst? curses.

part of the trouble almost all my life universe

authors notes: finally finished my requests off thankyou for being patient with me, now who's ready to for the next TAAML update??

“Who is it, babe?” A deep voice spoke, and Spencer felt his face go green when he saw the adonis of a man who stood behind her, his chest littered with smudged lip gloss and bruises resembling her own neck trailing down to his crotch. 

Her face was on fire when Spencer looked back at her, something betrayed in the hazel of his eyes which he knew was entirely illicit to feel in the circumstances, but it was true. 

“Fuck off, Renly,” She shoved him back behind the door, looking at Spencer like the friendship between them they were scrambling to salvage hung in the balance with whatever she said next. “You remember Renly, my lab partner at Johns,” 

Spencer nodded, the image of her lips on his pubic bone wouldn’t leave his mind, and he wondered what came after that, “I remember him,” 

She nodded back, and they went silent. 

They’d found themselves back at that stalemate.

“I’m just gonna…” Spencer trailed off, something sharp and painful in his chest as he looked at her. This was ridiculous, he had Maeve to worry about. Maeve, who was crazy about him, who he had a date with not even half an hour ago, who soothed the wound Bugsy had left when she’d moved to an entire other continent before he had a chance to tell her how he felt.

Except he did have a chance. He’d had plenty of chances, he’d just been too chicken to take them. And maybe that was what had made him so angry seeing a man twice his stature flirting and touching and grabbing her, knowing what they’d been doing before he’d interrupted. Maybe it was the fact he was irrefutably good looking, or that he was the kind of guy confident enough to call her babe and touch her so easily, or maybe it was the image of what she must have looked like underneath him to be as flustered as she was now. What had they been doing? Was he pleasuring her? Had she been teasing him? Had they been in the middle of full blown fucking?

Spencer didn’t know. The kid who had tackled string theory when he was fourteen years old didn’t know. And he didn’t think he ever wanted to. A whole Schrödinger's cat kind of fucked up where he knew exactly what they’d been doing, and yet his felt something hurt well in his chest at the fact he didn’t know at all. 

He felt like his head might explode, or like he wanted to rip his big brain out and kick it to the curb with how fast it raced with thoughts and images and sounds that all resembled her. 

“I’m just gonna go,” He spluttered, already turning to head down the millions stairs back to where he’d thrown his car into park, his footsteps clicking against the hard linoleum as he took them almost two at a time.

She didn’t care that she had little more than underwear and a shirt on, didn’t care that Virginia evenings had reached almost freezing at this point in the year. Bugsy didn’t care, because Spencer seemed hurt, and that was her least favourite look on him. 

“Spence!” She called, cursing when he didn’t turn back, and she’d barely had time to flick her door onto the latch before she was taking off after him, “Spencer, wait!

But he didn’t listen, he couldn’t. Not when he felt something close to tears welling in his eyes. Why was he getting upset? He was a grown man for fuck sake. He had three doctorates, a genius level IQ, and a job he adored. What did he have to be crying about?

He felt like he and Bugsy could only be described as Murphy’s Law, that everything about his day that could possibly have gone wrong between them did. That of course she was with some sort of adonis at this time of the evening, of course she was with someone else, because why wouldn’t she be? She was attractive, and quick witted, and sharp as steel. And most importantly she wasn’t his. 

“Spencer, what’s wrong?” She called, but his damn long legs were too fast for her, and he’d made it out the front door to her building before she could yell at him some more. 

By the time she got to the lobby, he was already half way down the street, his head straight down at the floor, his bottom lip quivering. 

The chill hit her like a stop sign as she ripped the door open, and she was quickly reminded how bare her legs were as she did so, her teeth gritting together. “Spencer!” 

But he didn’t look back, and she half considered risking the public indecency charges, only to quickly be reminded of her lack of socks and shoes as she took an experimental step onto the pavement, cringing in pain when it felt painfully harsh to her skin. 

Her stomach dropped. What had he wanted, coming to her at this hour when things had felt so odd and icky and wrong between them. Where was Maeve? Even the thought of the mystery girl made her face heat with annoyance, but Bugsy supposed that if Spencer was happy then she shouldn’t feel so damn bitter all the time. It had been the whole reason she’d brought Renly home, though bumping into him in the liquor store had been completely unintentional, because she’d wanted to forget all about the guy who used to be her best friend who she couldn’t have, who had a shiny new genius to hold his affections, to take the place she’d thought was hers. 

She should have known better. Bugsy should have known Spencer deserved so much better. She’d tried to dodge the fact of it in all the years they’d known one another, but it was like the reality had hit her square in the face, and the wind whipping against her bare shins was a wake up call. If things hadn’t been fucked up between them before, then they most certainly were now, all because she’d been so stupid to think she could drown her affections and squeeze out her love for Spencer into another person.  

An arm wrapped around her shoulder and a jacket was shrugged over her, and she looked up at Renly with a quivering bottom lip. She felt like she’d been punched in the gut seeing Spencer so distraught, lost for words, lost in general. And despite her better judgement, for the sake of the fact she’d never felt so alone, she let herself lean into Renly’s warm stomach, his muscles rippling beneath her hands as she shoved her head into his pectoral, burying her face away in embarrassment, possibly to even forced the tears back into her sockets against their will. 

“Is it complicated?” Renly asked, because he’d always been the gentle sort of giant, surprisingly kind for a guy who looked like he pounded roids non stop. Bugsy could have told him it’s because he was raised with a single mother and four sisters, but she wouldn’t bother. Sometimes people were just the way they were, no profiling needed. He patted her back soothingly as if he’d heard what she was thinking. 

She nodded, because nothing summed up Spencer better than complicated. 

“Yeah, it’s complicated,” She murmured, allowing him to kiss the crown of her head, because she was tired of licking her wounds alone, tired of being the one to beg for affection from people too good for her. 

Spencer blinked back the tears the entire way home, cursing himself for the way his stupid, envious brain produced every image possible of the goliath man in her doorway who could squash his head like a coconut, wondering what they were doing now that they weren’t interrupted. They were probably naked by now, probably-

Bugsy let Renly make her a green tea, and in turn he let her sulk and mope and didn’t take it too personally when she made it clear that sharing a bed was as far as they were going tonight. There would be no more nudity than they already were, no more lustful kisses fuelled by cheap red wine and misguided intentions, no more pretending she was someone else entirely. There would nothing.

Because perhaps Spencer didn’t know her as well as he used to, and perhaps that was entirely the problem.

[l0vergirlatheart]

Idk if ur requests are open, but hear me out XD. A creator!reader who descends on Teyvat meets all the Archons and such. Then up and leaves by changing their appearance in order to explore their creation and how it has changed. Every once in a while Creator will make themselves obvious by performing acts only the Creator could. Once they are found out they just up and leave again only to resurface after another Divine act. TLDR: Creator playing cat and mouse with Teyvat

oh my GOD creator is just TORTURING then atp

small ramble because i still have massive writers block [cries] also ignore how late this is pls ok mwamwa thnx

c.w // yan. chars

song : Best Friend - Rex Orange County

SAGAU INCOMING : YAN CHARS.

okay so you decided 'hey man, what if i wasn't worshipped the moment i stepped outside'

so you just said fuck it and shifted

(it's been a while since you've done so, it kind of felt weird and hurt a tiny bit)

walking around teyvat in an odd, different form. completely different hair, height, clothes, you get the gist

the only things you couldnt change however were three things:

your blood (still gold, but you didn't plan on bleeding infront of anyone)

your aura (still comforting, caring, and even alluring)

your voice (why? zero clue.)

escaping the throne room you've oh so sadly been bound to!! having fun while doing it!!

(the only real reason you managed to escape is bc you managed to get the archons out and actually tend to their nations, as per your request order)

messing around while escaping fr!! people passing by wondering why this random person they've never seen is (not very) sneakily running away from the creator's palace/temple

but eventually shrugging it off, albeit reluctantly

messing around in mondstat, playing with the npc children more than you could usually, giving them the time of their life!!

this is where you use your first creator powers >:3

some poor kid scraped his knee real hard on the bridge, let's say timmie (hes so sweet he just wants to defend his birds pls b nice to him!!)

you, being the belovent god you are, use your divine powers to heal him

whether you do it with the hc of having to use your own gold blood or just having special healing powers only creator has, you do it

however, your dumbass mind hadn't thought of the fact that Venti may have been watching this

new outlander person with a mysterious aura

and now he quickly learns its you :0!!

the archons had no clue you could shapeshift!! why wasnt this in the ancient scrolls??? did they just lose the ones that mentioned it???

venti immediately finds some weird wind way to tell the other archons

fucking loud mouth

speaking of which, ei is freaking. out.

she came back to just check on you in your throne room and youre just.

not there??

panics, almost goes to zhongli before she gets venti's message and calms down slightly

atp you've realize you've outed yourself

so after making sure timmie is find you quickly run off into the forest before venti can come after you and smother you (both physically and with questions)

forest reached, new mission : new form needed

this basically keeps happening, and it's a needed breath of fresh air for you

running to liyue looking like a normal person until you magically form a special medicine that was unheard of from your hand for an elder, sickly lady

running from liyue to sumeru and shifting into!! an animal!! a fox!! cat!! tiger!! dog!! bird!! any of the sort!!

only getting outed from sumeru after you accidentally spoke while in animal form and having to go over to inazuma as an unknown, traveling sailor!!

getting outed after that for your extremely familiar aura and voice (inazuma people are scarily observant towards strangers) and eventually getting shoved escorted back to your palace/temple

funny stories to tell

however, the archons wont be leaving your room for quite a while..

oh well, who says you don't have other stunts to pull?

[best-overplayed-song]

fun facts

About "Running Up That Hill", Kate Bush explained: "I was trying to say that, really, a man and a woman can’t understand each other because we are a man and a woman. And if we could actually swap each other’s roles, if we could actually be in each other’s place for a while, I think we’d both be very surprised! And I think it would lead to a greater understanding. And really the only way I could think it could be done was with the devil. And I thought, ‘well, no, why not a deal with God!’ You know, because in a way it’s so much more powerful, the whole idea of asking God to make a deal with you. You see, for me it is still called “Deal With God”, that was its title. But we were told that if we kept this title that it would not be played in any of the religious countries, Italy wouldn’t play it, France wouldn’t play it, and Australia wouldn’t play it! Ireland wouldn’t play it, and that generally we might get it blacked purely because it had God in the title"

thanks to Stranger Things, Kate Bush has broken 3 records: the longest-ever gap between #1 singles, the longest time for a single to reach #1, and the oldest female artist ever to score a #1.

when asked what he meant by "a thousand hugs from ten thousand lightning bugs", Adam Young said: "I was the recipient of 1,000 hugs from 10,000 lightning bugs for a grand total of 10,000,000 hugs. As the lyrics of the song clearly state, the average layperson would not believe their eyes if 10,000,000 fireflies were to illuminate planet Earth, nor would the average person conclude by natural instinct that 10,000 lightning bugs acting as a collective group, are capable of embracing a human being 1,000 times without difficulty. By the same token, a gathering of lightning bugs in such vast numbers form a sort of “swarm,” and a swarm can collectively surround a human and deliver a “hug” that a single firefly, acting according to the dictates of his own conscience, simply cannot. Consequently, I was embraced 1,000 times by 10,000 luminescent insects. This may seem inconceivable due to the firefly’s soft-shelled body, which is common among all winged beetles within the Lampyridae insect family. Members of the scientific community may be tempted to cast doubt upon the possibility of this exchange due to the immobility of the prothorax and pterothorax, in addition to the elytra protruding outward while a firefly is engaged in mid-flight. However, I can testify to the accuracy of this exchange. I can furthermore add that while each individual hug took place, each firefly participated in the chemical reaction commonly known as bioluminescence in which the enzymes within the firefly, in the presence of oxygen, magnesium ions and ATP, emitted a chemically produced light or “glow” because they were happy to be hugging me"

[imjustanasshole]

I have a dumb and undeveloped theory, but a theory nonetheless:

what if Will's painting is a foreshadowing of season 5?

okay, hear me out: first of all, the three-headed dragon represents the 3 "villains" (basically the monsters of the Upsidedown) we got throughout the series (the Demogorgon, the Mind Flayer (twice) and Vecna/One/Henry) and how they're gonna have to completely defeat the 3 of them in season 5. Because, for now, the only thing they've been able to do is sent them back to where they belong, but alas, they keep coming back, so maybe it's time for a final battle. Another interpretation of this could also be about the types of villains in the series: the "bad men" (aka: the people from the lab, Dr. Brenner, etc.), the Upsidedown monsters (previously mentioned), and a third thing that we haven't seen before or something we've seen without realizing (like closed ones being used as villains, e.g.: the flyed, especially Billy, and Vecna's hallucinations, especially Max's mom).

the second thing I wanted to point out about the drawing is that it features only the og party. I think this means that season 5 is going to be centered around them the most, much like season 1; we've spoken a lot about "full circle moments" when theorizing, and it really doesn't get any more full circle than that. We've got an overhead framing with Lucas and Dustin standing behind, with Lucas more towards the back and Dustin kind of in the middle, and Will and Mike pretty much side by side (which might mean something about their dynamics this season, but that's another topic entirely), with Mike a little more forward, either leading them or facing the Evil™ first (could also be sacrificing himself, I'm not sure). It also may look like Will and Dustin are in the middle if you don't really get the angle, but I don't think that's it.

What that "different point of views are different character duos" thing could mean, imo, is that we're going to see multiple different pairings among the og party this season; it's already been confirmed that there will be scenes with Lucas and Mike, and Will and Mike, plus some bts pictures of Mike with Steve and Robin might lead us to believe that there will be scenes of him with Dustin as well, AND the, atp, infamous bts photo of Will, Mike, Joyce and Lucas could also mean we're getting Lucas and Will scenes (or at least Lucas-Mike-Will) (this last two could be a stretch). (Disclaimer(?): we can't trust the bts pictures that much, just because two actors/actresses are together on set doesn't necessarily mean they're filming together, for this the pap pictures are a way more reliable source of information).

Now, is undeniable that symbology is really important in Stranger Things, and I might be wrong and reaching way too much, but, I don't know... It just seemed really intentional that Will made a drawing for Mike specifically that features the four of them, and with such an specific situation too, I don't think we've ever talked about a three-headed dragon before, that hasn't been a recurring villain of their campaigns, as far as we know, so I really think it might truly mean something, if not specifically this.

If this is crazy and makes no sense, you guys can ignore it, I might just miss analyzing paintings in art history now that I've graduated high school and this might be my way of coping with it. On the other hand, if someone else has already talked about this theory or this is a well-known speculation in the fandom, I was not aware of it, I swear this popped up in my head when I was looking at the goofyass drawing that Mike's Funko pop is holding in number 1539.

Either way, if you're interested and want to talk about this with someone, please choose me, because I'm going crazy over here, grasping at straws. Thank you for the attention.

[queersouthasian]

I have seen quite some people being confused about what was Charlie's plan or what he even intended to do, so here is the proper step by step explanation:

P.S : all of this is based on the show, nothing is influenced from the novel.

•Before (kind of) meeting Babe:

As Charlie had mentioned in ep 7, something I had stated before in some other post, his plan was not that extensive. Charlie while being in Tony's space came to know about all the shit he does including babe being the number one target and how Tony had an Enigma going after Babe. He jumped in thinking he would keep an eye on Tony while living with Babe or around babe and would find information about that Enigma too. He wanted to do everything alone but much to his concern,Jeff wanted to help. Anyways. His plan was to be around babe, keep on track with tony 'cause he knew he would find better information of what he is trying to do if he is near babe since babe is the target, find out about that enigma and eventually inform babe about everything when the right time comes. His plan was not to fall for babe or make babe fall either. It is his natural caretaker instict that made him want to save babe. He can't just live his life knowing that someone was in extreme danger. A part of me now believes he was not even supposed to take babe's powers either. He didn't know that babe would hire "boys" to have sex with, that's why he recommends him being his servant, 'cause his plan was to leave later when the time comes, and being "servant" would serve the purpose of being near Babe, BUT was genuinely taken aback when babe wanted to have sex. He was now worried 'cause how is he supposed to be intimate with babe without taking away his powers??? That's why he hesitated before touching babe, remember when he first put his hand on babe's face, he hesitated right there, he also gulped. He was worried and concerned, rather panicking 'cause he knows what happens when he touches. But the entire show is literally, "you can't have A and B, one has to go", so Charlie either had to leave or stay. Telling the truth was not the option 'cause babe wouldn't listen. Babe during that time was being heavily influenced by way, so why would he even think Charlie was telling the truth about his intentions? 'cause atp he was a literal stranger to him.

•After ep 7:

Charlie's plan was severely ruined by Kim, unintentionally, but it did happen. Kim revealing Charlie's main secret disrupted the whole plan. Charlie was not supposed to tell Babe all that before anything happened 'cause the result will be disastrous and we saw that. For babe, along with way 's hypnotism/manipulation, Charlie's secret/lie was a "betrayal" 'cause he didn't know the cause of it until Charlie told him. Here the plan was, when the right time would come, he would have revealed everything 'cause by then Babe would have first handed seen/witnessed/understood the reason, but this reveal being so soon, with the cause being so unclear made Charlie look like a traitor. That's why he had spill everything, every detail. Here, we see something else as well. Charlie had fallen so deeply for babe until now, he could not bare the thought of babe hating him, misunderstanding him. That's why he repeatedly goes after babe, to his very home, to let babe know the truth. He even tells everything about the absorption. He knows babe may never want to see him again, that's why he gulps and hesitates before saying. Babe could have never found out why his senses were gone, but he can't keep babe in dark anymore. If the truth was out, he needed to clear thing out, to atleast let babe know, Charlie would never take advantage of him. When babe turns his back, we see Charlie being terrified, he doesn't even look like that near Tony. He is TERRIFIED babe would hate him. So the hesitation, those unshed tears, the "I can die for you" 'cause AT THAT MOMENT, he was like fuck the plans, if babe wants his powers back, he will get it. Since the truth is out, and he couldn't still find the enigma, atleast let him give back babe's powers, 'cause babe is his priority. And Babe refusing that made Charlie give that genuine smile. It's the way Charlie has this relaxed face when he hugs babe, it's the face of someone who has been misunderstood for so long, finally having someone love him, understand him. The face of relaxation that his love doesn't hate him, would not leave him.

•Fake death:

This one came out later. When CharlieBabe started fighting together, now Charlie openly being able to protect babe, Jeff says if they continue to do that, they all will be killed. Listen, this was Jeff's analogy, he thinks that if they continue to go after tony, they all will die a brutal death. He also tells Charlie that Tony would kidnap him. This "kidnap" thing confirmed that Tony's target has been successfully shifted from Babe to Charlie. But Tony doesn't know that Charlie's powers are absorption and that he can return the powers once dead, so he, for the first time, gives complete responsibility to do something/prepare something that would help him fake his death. He wanted Jeff to look out for this, maybe because he knew since Jeff ran away before, he has some connections 'cause how or where did he live during that time?? Also he just wanted to protect babe, keep him safe and comfort him especially after whatever way did and we all know he blames himself for not doubting way before.

•After "Death" :

With the help of the drugs we see Charlie not only removing his powers but obviously being able to give babe's powers back. But babe going after Tony as a form of revenge is definitely something Charlie got to know through Jeff. One thing is clear that when Jeff gets kidnapped, Charlie calls him too, as usual, maybe to inform him that "uncle" is babe's dad and since Kenta had given away the phone to those boys, definitely they picked up, and since they picked up they definitely informed Charlie how they got the phone. Obviously Charlie connects the dots and goes in to save Jeff, but I believe when he entered the building the first thing he notices is Babe being beaten up, and Charlie being Charlie, enraged that they hurt babe, immediately jump in to save babe, that's why the look he had when he looked at Babe had concern but also grief and guilt, a "fuck I missed you sm", so in my opinion, even this sudden meeting was not a part of the plan. (Obviously the next ep has more information or may be not, so either I am right about this or absolutely wrong lmao)

Jeff and the timeline of his future sightings:

This goes like this:

Now, I remember someone saying how Charlie wanting to "change" future makes the future happen. And that's something interesting to think of, but that's not it. Charlie did not "Change" the future, he "Altered" it. Playing with time is dangerous, so the outcome maybe the same, but the cause can be different.

The "Death on Racetrack" car which was overturned was number "83", exactly the car Charlie was in, BUT in that vision, we all see the person laying face to the ground and blood everywhere. But that's not what happened to Charlie. If Charlie was the one who was supposed to be in the crash, in the "83" car, then the result and cause of THAT accident was different.

Babe going to avenge for Charlie would have been constant but the cause was different and most definitely the result would be. In the vision, we didn't see Alan, we do see CharlieBabe, with a gun pointed at them, but we see Tony with a sword attacking them, killing jeff. We also see Winner killed and Babe crying wounded. Don't know if the last two would happen, and if does what's the cause? But one thing is sure, that the result is altered. In their version, there is a shootout, and Kenta is the one who caught Alan and Jeff, we also see Pete and Way being involved. The future is unchanged, but Charlie's plan to alter it does infact work, he changes a version where they all loose to where they all can survive, where there is a hope to survive.

Also the "kidnap" thing, that would have happened, but in their version, they stated the plan to Tony, thus manipulating the outcome.

[pixellangel]

okay. it is high time i make a pinned post™

throwing this all under a readmore so you dont have to scroll so much <3

hello!!! my name is pixell and my pronouns are they/them!! i'm nonbinary, as well as demisexual and bi <3

i'm an artist and i live in the u.s.!! (i'm also an epic gamer™)

a few of my current interests include: in stars and time, vocaloid/vocal synths in general, epithet erased, ghost trick: phantom detective, in stars and time, loz tears of the kingdom, loz windwaker, loz just in general honestly, persona 5 royal, phoenix wright: ace attorney, the great ace attorney, in stars and time, honkai star rail, genshin impact, project sekai, pikmin (mostly 3 and 4), bocchi the rock, pokemon, and did i mention in stars and time? i like in stars and time

a guide to my tag system:

#pixell.txt: textposts!! mostly silly/dumb but sometimes things that are important to me

#pixell.art: all my arts!!!! id appreciate you giving this one a look if you have time <3

#pixell.png: posts with pictures!! this doesn't include art and is mostly memes or posts from elsewhere on the interwebs. there is very little in this one

#pixell.ask: ask answers!! i also put the asker's url as a tag when i remember for easy searching

#pixell.poll: polls i've made!! there's quite a few of them atp, mostly things i want opinions on from internet strangers

#mg:gr: STUFF FOR MY RPG MAKER GAME!!! AAAA!!! i would love you forever if you got interested in it and wanted stuff to look at. all of it is in this tag :3

misc notes:

i don't have dni criteria but i'll block you if i don't like you

-i post/reblog a lot of undescribed media

-my hypers do tend to fixate. if i become a fan of a new thing it may be all you hear from me for like a week or two

-I AM MAKING A VIDEO GAME AND I WOULD LOVE TO TALK ABOUT ITS LORE AND CHARACTERS AND SUCH. PLEASE SEND ASKS ABOUT IT. IF I FORGET TO ANSWER I AM SO SORRY. YOU CAN ALSO EMAIL ME ABOUT IT!!

- SEND ME GAME QUESTIONS AND STUFF AT magicalgirl.grimreaper@gmail.com AND I AM MORE LIKELY TO REMEMBER TO RESPOND <3

-queue is for cowards and i do not use it

-mutuals ily

-even if we aren't mutuals if you interact with my posts even semi-often ily

-refugees from other collapsing socials (*cough* reddit and twitter *cough*) are very welcome!!

thank you for reading!!!

[thewalrusandmeman]

The Day I Met Daniel Johnston

It was a sunny day in May. My then-girlfriend (now wife) drove me and a few friends to Manchester; we thought we’d make a bit of a day of it and visited the city for some food and shopping. After some rather mediocre Chinese food at lunch, we decided to stroll along the canal down to the comedy store more than anything to familiarise ourselves with where the show was that night. 

There were a few bars next door to the comedy store, and as the weather was nice, we decided to sit at the adjacent bar and have a few drinks. I was so excited that I was going to finally see Daniel live after obsessively collecting his albums in the previous 18 months and feeling such a kinship with him due to my passion for home recording and struggles with mental health, as well as a fixation on a lost love who inspired a lot of my songs. 

In an excitable childlike way, I manically and jovially asked, “Where’s Daniel!?” To anyone who passed by, much to my friend’s embarrassment and the puzzled looks of these random strangers. 

After an hour of this. I asked again to a rather tall gentleman, “Where’s Daniel?!” 

When finally it paid off. 

“ Daniel?” He said 

“He’ll be here in about 15 minutes; he’s coming in a taxi with his brother, there’s been a mix-up, and they’ve lost Daniel’s guitar on the train here.” 

While we waited, my friends were now having to admit that my excitement, despite their secondhand embarrassment, had worked.

Suddenly a taxi pulled into the little side road and outstepped the man himself with Brother Dick.

As he walked up to the patio of the outside seating, we excitedly approached him. 

Hi Daniel, We said, he looked at my two friends who were very tall and, let’s just say, enjoyed their food and said, “Bigger guys!” 

In a tone of such relief, having previously played the ATP festival the week before, I imagine being mobbed by a lot of preening waif-like indie boys in skinny jeans with floppy fringes, as was the fashion in the alternative scene at the time. 

After a warm, friendly greeting and a chat about the lost guitar, which I believe sadly was never recovered. Daniel said, “OK guys, shall we go and play some music?” He’d mistakenly thought we were tonight’s pick-up band. I’ve always regretted not just running with this despite not having any instruments with us, as all my pals were also more than competent musicians.

We explained that we were just coming to the show and had arrived early. The doors opened up to the comedy store, and we decided to go into the foyer have a drink and check out what merchandise was going to be available.

Daniel came to sit with us! He sat down right next to me on the leather sofa, and we chatted a little. I asked him how he was doing, and he was just as I had imagined he would be (on his good days) friendly and warm in his T-shirt and sweatpants; he reminded me of a cross between Casper and a Care Bear. 

There were some postcards on the table in front of me, and I asked him if he would mind giving me his autograph, I would’ve loved to have asked him to doodle something for me, but I didn’t want to pressure him or make him feel like a monkey in a zoo, so I was happy to have his signature and a little peace symbol. 

We asked if he’d like a drink. "Please,"  he said, "a coke would be great." My pal asked, regular or diet? As is a standard question at a bar in the UK. "I prefer regular, said Daniel" So off he went to get us all a drink. Dick had been milling around talking to the organisers about a few things. As my friend brought the drinks over, watchful Big Brother Dick asked if Daniel’s Coke was regular or diet. 

Dan was busted! Dick politely asked if we could swap it, so we did.  

We sat and had drinks and said how excited we were for tonight’s show. And then it was time for Dan to run through some songs with the actual band that night and Jeffrey and Adem. And so that was my meeting with Dan. Something I’ll cherish forever.

I recorded the show for my keepsake memory on a cassette recorder, which I thought was fitting, and as the years rolled on I thought the cassette had been sadly lost to time until I discovered it yesterday in my in-law’s garage. So here it is in full; you can occasionally hear me and how excited I was. 

I went on to see Daniel many times after this. But you never forget your first. 

Hope you enjoy listening. I did the best I could to clean it up a little and master it. 

It is what it is, but I think it is quite fitting that it was recorded on a cassette when more hi-fi options were available even back then. 

Apologies if in my original post, some were led to believe I also recorded the meeting, but I felt even then, at 22, that would’ve been impolite.

With love to Daniel and all his fans, new and old. 

Enjoy

Joseph xx

https://archive.org/details/daniel-johnston-live-at-the-manchester-comedy-store-may-21-st-2007-24-bit-wav_202409

[ilynpilled]

do you believe jc’s endgame is to die together?

i think i have communicated much of this already, but let’s just say i am more open to the possibility than most jb/jaime ppl, but i am not at all as certain of it happening as most ppl in general fandom seem to be, and i am also not a huge fan of it personally. here is my perspective:

yeah, it is explicitly integrated into their belief system. it faded from jaime’s, as he did abandon her, and already often contradicted it through moments of being ready to recklessly die, or his passive suicidal ideation, but it was always present as a key aspect of their ‘destined lovers’ delusion. the thing with me though is that i dont really think this is how george tends to do foreshadowing? he does love to be unpredictable. and i have seen this argument many times before by other people who doubt this being their trajectory. not to mention the whole idea seems to get deliberately deconstructed over time.

jaime comes to the realization that she was the stranger (and we know he is cersei’s stranger, but she does not think he means death). he starts treating the relationship very differently (george says they are “effectively estranged”), and their fate is no longer entwined in his head. them saying they will die together is telegraphing that is very in your face. i mean the text is telling us what would happen explicitly. is that supposed to be deliberate and meant to be a tragic irony? i can see it working from that perspective maybe. but i think this aspect would still be effective without the double death necessarily, even though i can see how the wording may be deliberate here, i just have certain thematic gripes with it. we know these two are not supposed to be reliable narrators when they say this. their relationship is a twisted attempt at self-love. again, i get that there is a subversion happening with cersei being killed by him for one, but is the belief system supposed to end up “endorsed” by the text from the pov of jaime’s character, even if it is tragically ironic? what i am saying is that ig i would be more certain of it happening if cersei did not keep repeating it explicitly atp while jaime is completely contradicting it simultaneously. if they are supposed to doom each other, what is really the point of that divergence? of the deconstruction of such a narrative in jaime’s head? why not send jaime back and have him not make those kind of key choices? jaime’s arc is supposed to be about choices (“whatever he chose…”), and defining his own fate and identity (like you do not even have to believe it is about exploring redemption to get this out of the text), so i really still cannot help but dislike the idea that this is set in stone despite everything that he keeps doing and the choices that he keeps on making. like there is an essentialist aspect to this belief system that i would prefer to be subverted honestly from the perspective of his character. i want all of these choices to have some kind of result (the letter, oathkeeper, the pit, rejecting her because of certain ultimatums even before the cheating reveal, abandoning the pursuit of the brotherhood for the vow to cat in adwd). + the hand that held her foot could have very well been the one that got chopped, so there is symbolism there. he is not tied to her. and that hand loss and “change” is constantly emphasized when it comes to JC. and i really do not want jaime to die before having some kind of confrontation with bran tbh. and i have talked about the widow’s wail thing before. if jaime is gonna wield it (which i think there is a set up for), then he would have to come out of KL alive with it. the weirwood dream also has them separate. her torch being the ‘only light in the world’ is replaced by brienne’s sword’s fire being the only one still burning in his darkness when the ghosts rush in.

this is another argument that i have seen before, and see validity in. george does write that belief system as something that has an element of ‘sociopathy.’ like of course it isn’t meant to be ‘romantic’. and jaime is also growing out of it. his relationship with a lot of characters now, brienne included, is a testament. i do not at all mind if jaime dies down the line, i just really would prefer it if there is some form of triumph over the self when it comes to his ending. i also atm cannot imagine how it would go, and what would cause jaime’s death, and how they would “leave the world together” logistically with the valonqar prophecy existing. so while i think george might be capable of executing it in a way that i could like, and i see that tragic irony working out, i still am not crazy about it as a concept atm for all the reasons above. we will see.

[shytastemakerthing]

Hi I was hoping for a matchup!

Romantic and platonic of your okay with doing both if not just romantic :)

First off I am a Scorpio and my mbti is INTP but I'm more of amnivert.

As for my personality it depends on who I'm around. If it's people who are energetic and really loud I'll tend to keep a more motherly role, But if I'm around people who are more mature in nature I'll be the loud and stupid one. My sense of humor is pretty rude and sarcastic in general if I know the person I'm with can take it, if not I'll cool it down. I like to think I'm self aware of how others are feeling. I'm that one person who knows like everyone but isn't popular, if you know what I mean. However I don't have any close friends which kinda sucks but whatever. I don't wait around thinking things will get better, if I'm not being treated right I'm gone which has led me to ditching a few people.

I was accidentally told by my friend once that I come off as intimidating or hard to approach as well I didn't know till then but I have a horrible case of RBF so it makes sense. 💀

As for the things I like: the main thing has to be music I'm concerned for my ears atp, my favorite artists have to be Chase Atlantic, Lana Del Rey, The Weekend and Artic Monkeys. Candy, I have a sweet tooth but I'm trying to cut back a bit, trying new candies is pretty fun too. Video Games, but I'll mainly stick to hand held consoles(my phone or switch) I mainly play puzzle or mystery games, TV screens are too bright and loud. I enjoy going out and doing things with people too, helps get me out of the house.

My hobbies include: Lego: but the big complicated sets not the kids ones I swear 😭 Origami: I just like throwing Ninja stars at the people I know or maybe if a stranger is just sitting beside me I'll just give them a paper swan, the reactions are always cute y'know. Book/Manga collecting And finally trying out random things I have like one day hobbies y'know like maybe I'll start cooking for a week or crocheting, puzzles, stuff like that while watching a show I'm still trying to find a hobby to really pick up.

I don't play any sports though it's never been my thing, but I try to go on walks every other day which is nice.

Things I don't like are pretty limited, it's probably just bad scents and cat fur.

That's all I can think of right now so I hope I did this right and thank you!<3

A/N: Hello and thank you so much for your request as well as your patience given how long this one has been in my inbox! I hope that you enjoy your match-up and have a wonderful day/night!

Request: Twisted Wonderland Match-up

I match you with........

Floyd Leech

Look, there are a number of reasons as to why the chaotic, mood swings filled eel man was chosen

Make this man a ninja star and his menace level only increases

A lot

You may have had Jade and Azul come to you about this, one rather amused and delighted while the other is more frustrated

Not too hard to figure out which is which on that

Motherly mode comes out big time when he is one of his more sporadic moods

The chances of him getting into trouble or hurting himself is quite high but he loves that you are there to be able to take care of him, he almost seems docile........

Almost

But when he is in more of one of his sour moods, that's where your fun side comes out because no matter how deep in a slump he is in, you always manage to get him out of it

Yes, Azul and Jade have also come to you about that

Jade finds it rather impressive because not even him or his parents could get him out of a slump that easy

(Please marry him)

He strikes me as someone who would rather like Legos, whether they are simple or much more complex, it's a favorite pastime the two of you have

Crochet something for this man and he will carry it with him essentially for the rest of his life

Floyd is happy with you, one that won't be going away any time soon, he just hopes that you are as happy as he is, that's what matters to him

Thank you for your request!

[dragxnborn]

ᴛʜᴇ ᴜɴɪᴠᴇʀsᴇ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʟᴏᴠᴇs ᴘʀᴏᴠɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴡʀᴏɴɢ, ᴅᴏᴇsɴ’ᴛ ɪᴛ? whoops! hi guys this is helia again ;u; back here to introduce to you all HWA YUL .

  : ̗̀➛   thirty-one years young , a firebender and lightningbenderfrom the noble house of hwa. many know them to be unethical . how unfortunate , truly … i’ve always found them to be resourceful . they oft fulfill the duties of a gamemaster, though i expect them to be present at the 25th agni kai as a spectator . well , you know how every storyteller bends the tale they tell . 

please see the below for his tldr, (his background and behind the scenes are pretty dark but interaction wise he won't really be?)

tw: for the life of me i cant think of the proper tag but it's kind of dark. nothing explicitly written but the concept and idea

BACKGROUND

yul has two very extreme reputations within the community and society depending on where one falls. some regard his ability to continue being a gamemaster after the deaths of his sibling as chilling in an enticing way. others regard his choice to continue administering games as a wretched betrayal to the family that had opened their arms to adopt him as their own considering his circumstances

yul had been adopted by the hwa family out of sentiment and friendship (from the former second lady) following the mysterious death of his parents, who had served the hwa family for a majority of their life

however, during his 18th birthday, yul faces the true reality that he's nothing more than a surrogate for the hwa family's other children to serve as a tribute

before he turns 21 for the year the agni kai is meant to be hosted, he does everything in his power to find a way out of being forced to become a tribute. somehow, he manages to get taken under the wing of a well known gamemaster and that's when the trajectory of his life begins to change

at 21, yul is saved from the agni kai after being chosen to join the gamemasters and his sibling is then forced to become the hwa family's tribute instead. on one hand, being a gamemaster is the one way that yul is able to continue saving himself from becoming a tribute. on the other, yul is forced to orchestrate the conditions in which his siblings will die in for each tournament that follows.

etc. uses hwa yul and yul interchangeably ( the latter more with those he's close with )

PERSONALITY

the type that people love to hate and hate to love

it's been ten years that yul has been in the field of working as a game master. he's perfected the front he puts on to the world as a known gamemaster. confident and unbothered.

yul's nonchalance and the weight of truth in everything about his life may rub people the wrong way. this isn't something he does directly or on purpose to egg people on. (it's really just a defense mechanism atp to not breakdown).

pretty tortured actually internally. there's literally no one else on the whole wide world that yul hates more than himself and it's hard living with his conscience. but his goal has always been to live to see another day, so he makes do.

PLOTS

few people know that yul has suffered from harsh sleeping conditions. even fewer know that it's the endless deaths he's caused that haunt him in his dreams every night — especially those of his siblings. tell me, how do you put together a broken man ? ( someone very close )

people don't know the things that yul does behind the scenes to pay tribute to lost ones. he does a lot of unknown things in anonymity. it should be enough for him, but it isn't. so when you curse him and beat him, he lets you. ( someone in pain )

it's rare for yul to let his guard down. but under the influence of the moon and sweet wine, yul lets slip the insinuation that his life isn't as grand as it seems. his standing with the hwa family only remains because lord hwa hopes he'll be chained to his dirty deeds for the rest of his life. ( maybe a stranger )

people who blame him for the deaths of their siblings/family members

tributes/mentors? ( how do you feel about him? )

friends (maybe those who just try to get on his good side to get an in on the tournament, or actual genuine ones?)

[minniepetals]

😭😭 god that chapter is so hard on me, like im bout to foot the bill for therapy and ha happiness atp. It’s also nice that Yoongi kept his promise. And I kinda sympathize with the rest of them to be harshly considered strangers again as well. But as for Namjoon tho yea that info may be tied with her past, I think he should take an step forward in trying to mend a little bit of a bridge to walk towards that info. Yuna and Sunoo losing it, Yoongi slightly losing it im just so distraught 😭😭- Jellyfish Pumpkin

the contrast between yn telling the mister butler in her dream that she wants to live to her in real life, getting tortured and not caring whether she was going to die or not.

i didn't write too much on yoongi's perspective but it couldn't have been easy seeing y/n getting tortured himself 🤧

[silly-vent-blog]

no chat, im not going to cry

not gonna cry because my best friend might be leaving the school and going into a probably shitty foster family

not gonna cry because my guy best friend is acting cold and all bitchy towards me and agrees he is but won't tell me what I did wrong

not gonna cry because I have several rlly fucking important exams next week and I KNOW I'm going to fail them

not gonna cry because I got my maths test back (that I thought I did well on) and I barely passed by literally three marks?!?!

not gonna cry because my old friend who used to know everything about me and vice versa don't talk anymore and we're basically strangers

not gonna cry because my dad's coming back from his two week trip to bangladesh and holy fuck, for once I might have somewhat?? just maybe?? enjoyed life??

not gonna cry because that means I won't be able to go on walks now that hes back (that actually really made me feel better) because he's strict as fuck for NO damn reason

not gonna cry because that means no more texting my girlfriend and friends after 11pm because now it might be a fucking danger to myself if I'm caught (which I probably would be considering how good my father is at stripping my bedsheets in the middle of the night in search of my phone because he had an inkling I may be awake)

not gonna cry because I hate my body more than I've ever hated it before

not gonna cry because of all my jealousy issues

not gonna cry because of my fomo

not gonna cry because I can tell none of my teachers fucking like me

not gonna cry because I know I'm irritating af and understand the ppl who hate me

not gonna cry because I can't hear anything out my left ear and haven't been able to for the past 5 days and my mum STILL hasn't booked an appointment

not gonna cry because I'm really sick

not gonna cry because I'm on the verge of literally failing school

not gonna cry because I saw adults (my relatives) talking shit about me at a family event even though I'm literally a teenager???? and was enjoying myself???? like im sorry I guess

not gonna cry because I have a new friend group and they're so fun and literally a will to live atp and the guy best friend mentioned b4 who means the world to me doesn't like any of them

not gonna cry because my english tutor who actually understood me and the way I learn left tuition and told us all never to contact her again

not gonna cry because I have no motivation to do anything but Girlrot and its been like this for.. what?? 2 years now?? going on 3??

not gonna cry because im not a lil bitch

im not

im a big girl, I don't fucking cry

[normalestgirlblog]

issue

I am running into a bit of an issue

as those who read my blog which is few know i have embarked upon a long distance situationship with a boy who i have had a thing for for quite some time. i am really happy, and he is really sweet, and i think that when we are no longer long distance it could be something good.

however

i am running into a bit of an issue regarding his past dalliances. he had an alcohol fueled one night stand with one of my best friends in the entire world. and this is no ordinary best friend. she is perhaps one of the most beautiful creatures to ever walk upon the earth and grace its presence. the first time i saw her, i was so taken by her beauty and smile and spirit i stg i fell in love at first sight and knew i had to make her mine in whatever capacity she allowed. we became instantaneous friends freshman year and have been by eachothers side ever since. i was by her side the night we both met him and she went home with him. i was also taken by him as was she, but i could see that they were the ones fucking that night. plus i was fucking wasteddddd as was she, and him. and honestly when im wasted fucking is the last thing on my mind so even if she werent there idk if i would have successfully put on the moves.

anyways

as he and i are beginning to know eachother better, i find myself at odds with my brain. we have already dicussed him and elizabeth, and i asked her well before i began talking to him if she cared or minded that i wanted to pursue something with him, to which she said she didnt. he also didnt have any qualms about it other than feeling bad that it was a one night stand and he didnt pursue her following.

i think it may also be worth it to mention that i have been in this situation before. my former situationship had sex with my cousin, which was ultimately the reason why we had sex, and my cousin is also one of the most beautiful people to walk this earth. i tried not to let it bother me when he and i began getting more serious, but i could not get out of my mind that he had sex with someone i both love and someone so incredibly breathtaking its annoying. i didnt like that he followed them, i didnt like that they mentioned how they hooked up. but i didnt let it affect me to the point that i broke up with him or stopped talking to them or anything bad. i just kinda suppressed it

i am surrounded by beauty and it is so amazing and yet fueling my deepest insecurities. i am no stranger to this, i have known all my life that my friends were more desirable than i. its not a bad thing, i think all my friends are beautiful and deserve all the appreciation in the world. at times though, i have found it can make me insecure.

anyways back to the boy. i have wanted to send him pictures where i look good, or just memories, but she is in them. and she is so stunning its nauseating. i cant bring myself to send them. what if he saw it, realized how beautiful she was, and used me to get back to her. or just ended it with me outright bc he couldnt be with me while im so close to her. idk why my mind goes to these places. i cant help it. its also 5 am and i havent been able to sleep.

also i feel weird talking to her abt it, but i love talking to her about boys. its one of my favorite hobbies. and yet i feel awkward esp rn considering out of the two of us currently she is the only one to have seen his penis.

maybe this is also because he met us both and had sex with her and doesnt even remember meeting me. maybe she is prettier than i am. i wouldnt doubt for a second she is more memorable than i am. i thought abt her for a whole week after we barely met. and now i dont even want to talk to either of them.

idk why i keep doing this to myself and hooking up with people that have hooked up with my friends. i try so hard to be secure and confident and i dont know if i can make it past this one. i am really scared but atp i def have feelings for him. im just gonna ball it out and hope for the best and repress these feelings until i am alone and can express them on here.

[koitalks]

aug 28

we talked it out. it did not go well for her. i left a final message na and going no contact. isang araw palang and i relapsed, haha. pero ill take it one day at a time.

she cheated- plain and simple. she had so many chances to break it off formally but she acknowledged she refused to let go bc she was selfish.

hmm.

rn i think galit and disappointed ako more than anything. says a lot about her tbh. im not staying friends with someone who's like that. never giving her a chance again, ever.

i had my own faults. di ko rin naman ni-reject nung maaga palang. i also lead her on. i always made sure to tell her she can let go na. ik di rason yung suicidal tendencies nya to not cut her off pero huhu. ig gusto ko rjn naman ng makakasama.

i think its just cruel to not at least tell me that things werent okay for months and that she wanted a break. eh si gaga onti lang sinabi, akala ko crush lang. di naman sinabi na ay kami na pala nung tayo pa rin. di naman daw maka-decide tas di daw inexpect na magkaka-ganon sila. isang bagsakan lang din sinabi. did she expect na mag-ook lang ako? haha. kung maayos niya sana ginawa edi sana di nagkaganto.

edi good luck nalang sa kanila lol. i have a feeling na di tatagal. bahala sya magsisi jan pagdating ng panahon.

thinking of all the things i could improve on myself bc may kasalanan din naman ako. also some other things i want to make clear sa next, kung meron man.

- set very clear boundaries at the start

- dapat may expected time from talking stage to serious. di puwedeng talking stage forever. maybe 6 months max

- pag ayaw talaga magcommit after 6 months edi cut your losses- hanggang friend nalang. or strangers kung ayaw nya magkeep ng contact. wag mo na patagalin

- put in effort into letting them know you care for them.

- put effort in knowing their hobbies, talk to them in vc. wag ka na mag-alangan. do your best.

- not talk ALL the time. they need to know di ka instant, putangina. also to lessen chances of toxic codependence. must understand na may avoidant attachment style ka.

- they need to be supportive in the things you do. di sila magaalangan.

- di nang gagaslight. hay. dito ata ako lagi sumasablay lol. they should NOT weaponize their mental health against you. they cannot use it as collateral or threaten you into doing something bad if you try to reject/leave

- must be independent. yung di ma-iinsecure dahil lang di ka nagpakita ng mga 1 oras.

- dapat may pangarap sa buhay. ang hirap neto. like i wanted to be supportive sa art and shit nya but she had 0 plans for the future. dealbreaker if di nageeffort maghanap man lang ng trabaho fr. atp i believe she will never be independent dahil nakaasa nalang sya sa allowance ng nanay nya.

- maluho sa tamang bagay. she spent so much on adopts. nothing wrong with that- kaso nga lang WALA SYANG TRABAHO AND SHE ALWAYS DID PAYMENT PLANS. kung may luho man, at least towards things na she can use- clothes, etc.

- di impulsive sa pagbili. point above. i need to control this too.

i think di naman ako nagkulang sa letting her know i care for her but... sighs. if nakulangan siya then we're just not compatible and it was never going to work out.

journal of thoughts after the shit that went down today 👍🏽

aug 20

ofc i feel like shit im crying lol. i feel like ive seen this film before vibes JQHAHAH. my self esteem is at its lowest. maybe the low lowest bc its happened twice. idk. alam ko naman na parating na eh tas di pa ako lumayo, wala man lang ka plan b plan c or whatever. haystt.

keep thinking na ako ba yung nagkulang??? ako ba kulang????? tangina third time na toh, ano ba ginagawa kong mali 🥲

will update mamaya for gratitude bago matulog. ayaw ko matulog na kakatapos umiyak, mahahalata sa mukha ko sa review bukas wahaha.

[noxtivagus]

hehehe