#they dont just come in for no reason we have to call them if theres an issue
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a little family
#buddy daddies#my art#doodles#sometimes a family is an two misfit assassins and the daughter of the guy you offed and thats a okay#but lets not talk about that#we love healing in this house and how do you heal if not after suffering#reis journey through depression and kazukis journey through grief#what 1 little girl does to a man#its 5 am all i can offer are doodles but i love them very much#i know we do reasonably get to call them cowards for not making it gay (esp at the end bc come on)#but i do love whatever relationship they have going becuase theyre just. Thats marriage babe....#theyre not going to be doing any dating with that committment that is the most domestic ass setting ive ever seen#everyone and their mother assumes theyre married/dating and doesnt even question it because theres NO QUESTION T O ASK#only the people involved apparently dont know theyre married#ok nvm they were cowards for not making it gay. but again. theyre clearly married your honor. theyre just a little stupid
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Yooooo you worked at Michaels too?
(Ex-Framing department employee here)
YEA LETS GO EX-FRAMING DEPARTMENT they never even got around to teaching me production it was all wrapping and taking orders :/ Idk how it is at other shops but we only had 3 people working the whole frame shop. One person did ALL the frame assembly and us other two handled everything else. Was absolutely not worth $11/hr. man fuck retail. FUCK Design Hub too, if I may
#id come in for my like 4 hour shift and would have to run + close shop which included wrapping#wrapping storing calling for all orders done plus get all yhe frames lined plus unpack and clean up all the new frames coming in all by#all by the end of the night PLUS frame shop had to clean the bathrooms every night#plus actually running the front desk and taking orders and sometimes ppl would take hours picking matts that would cut into the time i had#to have everything else finished PLUS if i for some reason had everything done on time theyd make me run sales floor too#it was insane all the stuff they had me learn for such shit pay like. and#never work michales but never do it around the holidays more important#you will never escape the glitter#all that and my framing manager never got around to teaching me how to assemble a frame.#at least it was nice to hide in the frame shop so i wasnt talking to customers 24/7 but still#customers treat you so horribly like i was sweeping once and this lady comes up to me like saying the bathroom was disgusting right#and i get it. it was always disgusting. but we did clean it every night. anyway its hard when you cant just tell people that 1.#1 we clean them every night so if theres a huge mess in it most likely it was another shopper who pissed on the floor just cuz.#and 2 they only give us a mop and some pine sol to clean the whole 2 bathrooms every night. dont blame me blame michals lol#everything else was just so stupid#i wanna know how many framing department ppl everyone else had because we had 2 part time and 1 full time and i was only there a few months
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#me? about to use tumblr as a diary again? in 2024? unfortunately:/#but here have a waterfall i saw on a hike last week as payment#i am sO tired and exhausted emotionally after dating#there's this guy that i fr thought was going to last and be around for a long time. we spent like every moment together that we could for 2#months straight and if we werent physicaly together we were texting or calling or on ft . just every part of our day had the other in it#not once did i ever feel unwanted undesired or uncared for. not once did i feel that i wasnt sure of his intentions. i felt safer with him#in those 2 months than i ever did with any one else i could think to compare to.#until one day he just didnt think it important to communicate any more. after 3 days of nearly nothing .. hardly any talking . i asked if#he was ok if we were ok. what was going on in his head. he said some ive just been with my buddies and family and havent been on my phone#and just. immediately thats heartbreak yanno. thats :// thats what they say when theres a new girl. but there'd never been a reason to think#there was another girl so i was like ok we're gonna trust bc this dude has been So good in every way. so i said imy but i understand. enjoy#your time with your buddies and with your fam -- i cant wait to hear about it (and hold you)#and i havent heard from him in the 3 weeks since. just randomly#so last night#i send the dreaded 'i miss you' text.#i dont expect to hear back and i accept the hurt that will come with that and the confusion that i've felt settles deeper into my heart#until this afternoon i hop on ig and see a hard launch that was posted an hour after my text was sent#that shit kinda hurt different. but also sent me into a bit of a delirious state where all i could do is laugh bc are you for fucking real#did she see my message? i know it. bc i know him and i know that he wouldnt hide anything from the person he's giving his heart#and his softness to. i can almost imagine how he showed her and promised her theres nothing to worry about#and there really isnt anything to worry about because he genuinely is the type to give his all to the relationship he's in#which feels silly to say after what happened w us. like no there wasnt a title ever#it sucks to call it a situationship because a month ago we were laughing in bed together about how we could never bc we were all in.#just the timing of the hard launch makes me giggle. did my text push them to have a conversation about what they are. was she really the#reason that he went away on me.#im trying not to blame myself . trying not to think about the phone calls i didnt answer. about what i could have done differently. trying#not to think about where we would be if i didnt let my anxieties hold me back. if i wasnt scared about what he'd think of the parts of me#that i keep hidden just a little bit longer than the rest.#and at the same time im trying not to put him on a pedestal. but that pedestal is just where i wholeheartedly believe he belongs#he set the bar for me. he set the standard. i was never too much. i was never too little. he made me feel perfect just as i am
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"be grateful for what you have" have you considered that i am but also want something else
#'at least theyre responding' stfu. i dont want a half assed convo i want someone who wants to talk to me#literally why tf am i settling for no goddamn reason when theres better ppl#'at least he' SHUT UP theres a least in that. i want above and beyond bitches who actually like me godbless.#sorry im so tired of this girl she keeps coming back everytime her friends ignore her and then just lowkey ghosts me otherwise#like ok kys!!! die!!! but shes also our childhood bsf so i love her i guess whatever shes nice ig idek idec#lying i do care i just need to not#whenever i dont hang out or call my friends i think that everyone in the world hates me when really theyre just waiting for me to ask them#while i am also waiting for them to ask so its just a cycle of realization and loneliness but its ok we get thru it fr#so sad my mom didnt let me bring my computer how do i call my discord kittens and play cards w them now#so glad i left like all servers and deleted everyone but my friends so i can have my acc as fr me instead of an online persona#its just so much more juliet i nearly accidentally wrote our irl name bye 😭😭😭#post#erics tag#sorry guys its been 10 minutes since i messaged our favorites im going through withdrawals
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𝐈𝐓𝐒 𝐍𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑' ─── christopher o. sturniolo
# 𝐅𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 . . . christopher o. sturniolo x ex!gf reader
# 𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘 . . . chris cant let you go even when he knows he has too.
# 𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐆𝐎𝐑𝐘 . . . angst
# 𝐀𝐍 . . . theres a big ass plot twist
# 𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐆 . . . Lover, you should’ve come over by Jeff Buckley
It had been a year. A year since Chris’ world came crashing down. A year since he lost everything. He lost you. It hit him hard, he would’ve never seen the breakup coming. He didn’t know why it happened. Why he had to lose his beautiful girl. Chris wasn’t sure if he could even call you that anymore. You weren’t together, and you hadn’t been for a year. But, he was never going to stop calling you his girl. You were each other's everything. And he missed having you as his everything.
Chris couldn’t get over, he hadn’t gotten over it. He never will. Chris knew he had to let you go but, he wouldn’t. Currently, Chris was sitting in your favorite restaurant, the one he first took you to when he asked to be your boyfriend. He felt like it was the only place where he could feel happy knowing that he had the chance to have been with you. But now, it felt like nothing. Nothing without seeing your enticing eyes, or delicate smile. It was stupid really. Stupid of him to still miss you even after a year.
Chris is pulled out of his thoughts when he hears a ringing noise. It’s Matt calling him. “Hey, We’re about to film a video. Are you down?” Matt spoke over the phone. “Yeah, I’ll start getting ready.” “Alright. We’ll be there in 20.”
Chris then hung up the phone and left for his room. By the time he was done, Matt had just pulled into the driveway, honked letting Chris know he was home. Chris rushed out the door putting his shoes on. He rushed into the car, closing the door behind him, finally putting on his shoes, he was out of breath. “Hey, you okay? You look upset.” Nick asked him. “Yeah, I’m okay. Just thinking.” Chris replied.
In all reality it wasn’t just thinking. He was thinking about his girl. The girl he had met when he was fresh into middle school, the one who he had fallen in love with. He felt so alone now that his girl was gone, he had no one to go talk to about his day, how filming went, or how much fun he had going out with his brothers.
“Are you sure you're just thinking? Or are you thinking about y/n?” Matt hinted. Chris just looked at him and sighed. “Chris, it’s time to let her go. It’s been a year. She’s probably moved on already.” Nick stated. “I know okay? But, I can’t let go of someone I loved for so long.” Chris commented, tears starting to swell in this eyes. “Hey, don’t cry. It’s gonna be okay. It takes time to get over someone you’ve loved for so long.” Matt chimed in.
“Look, we’re gonna get some food, record a video and then we can go home okay? And maybe you can ask her mom about how well she’s doing. I know you’ve been wanting to text her.” All three of them stopped by McDonald’s and picked up some food before they found a spot to record. They answered a few questions, laughed together, and just chatted.
After they finished recording they went back home. Chris thought about you the whole time there. He couldn’t stop talking or thinking about you. He felt so bad because he hadn’t reached out to you in months. The last time he talked to you was to wish you a happy birthday. So, when he got home that was the first thing he did. But, when he did, he didn’t expect the messages to turn green. He knows you hadn’t blocked him, or at least he didn’t think so. If you did, he didn’t want to think about it.
“Chris, what’re you doing?” Nick asked, standing behind him. “I'm trying to text y/n but my messages are turning green.” He replied. “Are you sure she hasn't blocked you?” Matt inserted. “No, i don't think so. i dont think she has a reason to.”
“well, you should ask her mom, see if she’s okay.”
“yeah, i’ll text her right now.”
Chris then texted your mom, asking her if you were okay. She didn't reply at first, so he waited and waited and waited. To keep his mind off things, he did a couple chores. took a shower, got dressed, and ate some food. That's when he feels a vibration. it was y/n’s mom. He opened the message and his heart dropped.
it felt like the world had gotten slower. Everything went quiet, it was like it was just him, alone, left in the world. Chris couldn't hear the twins calling for him. Chris didn't expect to receive the message that he did. Finally, Chris calms down and hears Nick yelling for him.
“Chris, are you okay? I heard something fall.” Nick questioned. Chris didn’t say anything, he just looked at him. “Chris?” Matt blurted out.
“She's dead.”
“Who’s dead?” Chris didn't reply. “Chris, who the fuck is dead.” Matt stated. “Y/n. She’s dead.” Chris replied, typing on his phone. Tears start swelling in his eyes. “No. She's not dead. We just talked to her last month.” Nick cried. “How did she die?” “She was murdered.” Chris responded.
“I cant believe we didn’t check up on her. We were so busy.”
“Her poor soul. She was such a beautiful person. I hope her mom is okay.”
“Yeah. I hope that she's okay. I can't imagine how hard it is for her.”
Chris stood up, walked out the door, and just stood there. He looked up to the moon and said “I'm so sorry I couldn't check up on you more. I'm so sorry.” He sat down and just cried. His girl was gone. His girl was sent from heaven. Now she was in heaven, resting not having to suffer anymore. He was never going to forget you. And ‘till this day, he tells everyone about you, and about how much of an amazing person you were. He wants people to know that you weren’t just a girl to him. you were his best friend. You were always going to be his best friend. He’ll always remember you as…
his girl sent from heaven.
©️ ovrour
taglist: @flouvela @sturniolosarethebest @missmimii @bernardsbendystraws @042502 @soupuurr @luvs4matt
#writers on tumblr#artists on tumblr#matt sturniolo#chris sturniolo#chris sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo x you#matt sturniolo fic#matt sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo x you#christopher sturniolo#matthew sturniolo#i wanna marry him#chris sturniolo smut#angst#nick sturniolo#sturniolo smut#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo triplets fics#nicolas sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo x reader#plot twist#mental health#deceased#jeff buckley#spotify#music
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Why i believe Gojo could come back
This chapter left us in a devastated state and was absolutely uncalled for, but I personally believe this isnt the end of the strongest sorcerer. There are several reasons as to why (These are just opinions, I could be wrong in certain areas AND personal feelings might make an occassional appearance.)
LEAKS:
This whole panel was obviously made for a reason. And we dont see gojo making a decision. Considering the fact that this is literally THE Gojo Satoru, he's more likely to choose north since there's numerous things left as plot holes. We'll get to that.
Here in this page, he mentions that Toji should've cut his head off to actually kill him. In the leaks, whats cut off is his upper body but not the head! I still can't quite wrap my head around RCT but lets say he's not able to heal himself. You know who can and who would? Yuta and Shoko
Now moving on
"Gojo then bids farewell to everyone." If hes truly gone then why would he be bidding farewell to the fallen comrades? If he's dead then isn't he supposed to stay in the afterlife with them?
Pretty self explanatory
What if Kashimo is going in to distract Sukuna while Shoko and Yuta can heal Gojo?
Now think about this. Gojo is gone, Shoko doesnt fight and who are all left? A bunch of sorcerers who are literally under 20, need guidance and we havent really seen any panel where they actually plan how they're going to go about in the whole battle. Gojo isnt a want, hes a NEED, a NECESSITY.
Remember, Toji who was dead long ago pretty much appeared out of nowhere in Shibuya Arc LMAO so- yes
WHAT IS THIS EVEN SUPPOSED TO MEAN
Theres no way Gojo would be left sealed for 3 whole years, brought him back just to kill him off in the most disrespectful way possible.
Besides, things that Gojo wanted to do haven't happened yet.
He wanted to tell megumi about his father
He wanted to see his students surpass the strongest sorcerer, aka him
He wanted to get rid of the higher ups
He wanted to properly mourn suguru (for which kenjaku has to be defeated but oh well)
He wanted to save Megumi
How'd we know what Gojo said here.
On to the other aspects of why killing off Gojo was a bad idea. We barely ever saw what happened to him, and an off screen death to the so called strongest sorcerer is just senseless. Gojo is a fan favourite. People started watching the show for Gojo (myself included) and there's a high possibility of multiple people dropping the manga since he isn't even there anymore.
The ending could take a turn for the worse considering the fact that Sukuna is just overpowered and Kenjaku hasn't done anything as of now. Unless there's some heavy plot armor I dont think the students even stand a chance against Sukuna and Kenjaku. Both outcomes- the students and others emerging as victors or sukuna emerging as a victor could make the ending absolutely terrible and this might as well top AOT for being the manga with the most disliked ending.
Gojo Satoru is the mentor for multiple; for Yuji, Nobara, Megumi, Yuta, Maki, Panda, Toge and the third years and its necessary for them to have someone to teach them. It is one of Satoru's wishes to see his students surpass him, which can happen only when he's there since there's nobody else who is actually capable of teaching them and leading them into the world as actual graduated sorcerers.
So Gojo dying will make the manga take a turn for the worse. Killing him off in the middle makes absolutely no sense and is just plain bad writing. People are prolly gonna kill me for this but lets admit the truth. Hyping this battle, building up tension just to finish him off screen is NOT good writing.
Anyways. There is factual proof of Gojo potentially making a return. Maybe at a cost, like him losing his power, losing his "strongest" title or anything else. He may not even be the same anymore but honestly as long as he's back, I'm fine.
It happened previously, and could happen again.
Satoru Gojo may not be the strongest and the honoured one, but may be reborn as a newer version of himself after getting humbled. Lotuses, as mentioned above symbolise rebirth, which is why i believe this is not the end.
A small bit of advice for gojo fans: Go watch haikyuu or highschool babysitters as a form of self care <3
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jjk236#gojo#gojo satoru#jjk gojo#jjk theory#jjk spoiler#jujutsu kaisen spoilers#sukuna#jjk sukuna#yuji itadori#satoru gojo#jjk leaks#jujutsu kaisen leaks#dont worry yall hes not dead#gojo will win#jjk manga#jjk headcanons#gojo x reader#jjk megumi#megumi fushiguro#toji fushiguro#jjk toji#jjk gojo satoru#jujutsu gojo#geto suguru#kenjaku#yuta okkotsu#shoko ieiri
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2026 Rewind - Grid x AudiDriver! Reader
Plot: After some devastating deaths within the F1 industry from unmistakable names in 2025, the FIA decide to make a plan to race at all of the old tracks that are iconic but haven’t been on the grid for a while.
A/N: this is racing heavy with only drivers name dropped, but if you want cool Ted and Crofty with Y/N vibes while learning more about some of the FIA Grade 1 Tracks, have a read!
“So Ted, let’s talk about this years line up. It’s just so iconic that I can’t bear it!” David Croft says as they are in the commentator box at pre-season testing.
“Yeah Crofty, obviously it’s so unfortunate the reason behind what we are calling the 2026 rewind because of some losses we had in the industry and this was the way the FIA decided to pay tribute to those people!" Ted explains before the onscreen for the year comes up.
"So, lets go through the year together and analyze it. We're starting of the season strong in the lovely Kuwait, here at Kuwait Motor Town, this is where we are kick starting off this season. It's a high speed track here just north of where we would typically start in Bahrain. This is a track consisting of 20 turns, and is 5.609km of racing ahead. I'm very excited as no-one in F1 history has raced here in an F1 car. Who do you think's going to do well here Ted?"
"Well, there's some really nice corners, and it's a similar temp to Bahrain so i think it's difficult to tell but I can imagine the Audi with Y/N now having done her rookie season learning all those key values about the F1 car and how it works. McLaren will also be good here, really tightening up the constructors championship this year!" Ted offers looking at all the onboard footage.
"Yes I agree, I think Red Bull tend to be quiet strong a the start of the year naturally and its a game for the other teams to be playing catch up!" Crofty agrees.
"Okay, then after Kuwait, we'll be travelling to and correct me if I'm saying this wrong but the Kyalami Circuit in South Africa near the wonderful capital Johannesburg. It's in replacement of the Saudi Arabian Grand Prix, we haven't raced in South Africa since 1993 and what a beautiful circuit this is, its got some really high speed corners and yeah, I think the Ferrari will really be great on those long straights." Ted says analysis the data of the cars in testing.
"And now here we have with us, Y/N Y/L/N Audi F1 driver here to talk through the rest of the tracks!" David says and points to the camera for you to smile and wave before he pulls out the microphone in front of you.
"Hello!" you grin and David and Ted both burst out laughing.
"What did I miss, I'm really sorry i was late!" you smile looking between them and they both nod in understanding of how tight the weekend schedule could be, they are shocked they actually have your time right now.
"It's completely okay, we understand! We've only introduced Kuwait and South Africa, we are about to move onto the changed Australia track! Your thoughts?" he exclaims and you smile.
"Yeah, obviously it's going to be exciting with all these new tracks that none of us have driven, so of course there was a lot of testing in the sims... but yeah its great to be here in Kuwait, and I'm excited to go to South Africa as well!" you smile.
"Yes, and how do you feel about Australia being changed from Albert Park in Melbourne to the Adelaide Street Circuit?" Ted asks with a grin on his face knowing how you felt about the Australian races.
"Well, after the spider incident in 2022, I've always been so scared to drive in Australia" you giggle, before Crofty pulls up the video of you in P4 of the Australian Grand Prix in 2022.
Y/N - Theres a fucking tarantula in my car Race Engineer - Copy that Y/N - No i dont think you guys get it, its on me
"And you ended up pitting there was no time to get it out of the car because of where it was, you were crying for the rest of the race and you were going so quick so you could just finish that you actually ended up winning your first race here and overtaking Charles Leclerc in, what back then was an Alfa Romeo." Crofty smiles and you nod.
"Yeah, so where ever that race is in Australia I know ill be on edge the whole time, I'll have my crew do like 6 inspections on my car before each session to make sure. It was traumatizing i tell you!" you admit.
"So after what will hopefully be a spider free stint in Adelaide on their street circuit we move on to south east Asia where we will exchange Suzuka Japan, for the Fuji SpeedWay, a truly iconic track before going back to an old favorite of some of the older driver on the grid like Lewis and Fernando in South Korea at the Korea International Circuit!" Ted says showing the line up for the races after Australia.
"I'm really excited for these, the atmosphere of the fans is always amazing and the tracks here are great I think Audi thrive on these sort of tracks and yeah, I'm excited to see what we can do there!" you smile, looking at the spinning track layout that popped up on screen.
You move on to Miami's replacement being the iconic Californian Long Beach Street Circuit.
"And we've been tipped of, by a certain Cash App driver that he'll be taking you to DisneyLand while out there?" he asks looking at you.
"Yes, Liam has already been once and when I said about wanting to go to radiator springs he and Daniel jumped on the opportunity to go, which then Yuki and Max wanted to come so it's now turned into this whole massive group trip!" you laugh knowing that half the grid would come with you guys.
"And of course much like the UK Italy is another pinnacle of Motorsport and we've had to change out two of the iconic track Monza and Imola. So for the first change of Italy we've changed it to the iconic Mugello track which I just really love, don't you Y/N?" Ted asks looking at you.
"Yeah I think Lando and Osc will be really strong there, I'd like to think me and Carlos are as well with the Audi this year... so yeah I'm excited for Mugello! Obviously they raced here in 2020 so it's the most recent of all the races this year to make a return so its only really me, Oscar, Logan, Fred, Theo and Kimi who haven't raced there" you smile analyzing the twisty track up on the screen.
"Yes, then we'll be moving onto, what was probably one of the toughest decisions of this year which was switching out Monaco and what to switch out such an exciting race with, so they didn't its the only race on the calendar this year that has remained unchanged!" David explains making you nod.
"I think, where this year is to show the history of F1 and what it means to all of us, the teams and the fans. And by keeping Monaco on there where its such a historic track, i think that's actually staying true to a rewind year!" you smile, you'd always loved the vibes in Monaco, from the fans to the track to how your car performed there.
"Yeah i agree i think it was the right choice keeping Monaco!" Ted exclaims also loving the vibes at Monaco.
"Okay, then moving all the way to the west, we'll be in Canada moving from Montreal over to Quebec at the second oldest track, the Mont-Tremblant Circuit!" David shows the new Canadian circuit on screen.
"Then after Canada we've got a really special double header with two Spanish Grand Prix's at different locations. We have the Valencia Street Circuit and Del Jarama Circuit. Both very exciting and it will be a long weekend in Spain!"
"I'm excited to see a street circuit in Spain, obviously we had Madrid for the last two years after Barcelona, so I'm excited for both Valencia as a street circuit and Jarama which is such an iconic track because of those tights turns and yeah I'm really excited for this one!" you smile.
"Obviously next one was another tough one, Silverstone again another iconic track and the UK has so many other iconic tracks that its hard to choose, there was talks of Aintree, Watkins Glen and Donington Park but ultimately they went with Brands Hatch what do you think on this?" Ted asks looking over to you, holding up a page showing all the different UK tracks.
"Yeah, I think there's some really iconic tracks in the UK, its my home so i grew up racing on a lot of those tracks in different motorsport categories, I think there's ones that are arguably better for Formula one, which is why Silverstone is the main circuit as it gives for the most interesting race, however for me it would have been a call between Brands Hatch and Watkins Glen so I'm glad that they chose Brands Hatch, I've got some great memories there at testing and showcasing the car or working with the Top Gear team, so I'm excited to race there!" you explain, the United Kingdom is the like Monaco in being both a founder and royalty when it comes to Motorsport.
"I 100% agree with that, however I just love Aintree so much and am gutted we wont see it!" David Croft admits.
"So after Brands Hatch we move to Monsanta in Portugal which we haven't raced in Portugal since 2021 because of the COVID restrictions but that was in Algarve so it'll be interesting to see the difference!" Ted offers looking at the next circuit floating on their screen as he zoom's in on turn 4.
"Then, again there another track we hate to see go even if its for one year but Spa, its so iconic and its one of the most dangerous circuits we race now and it's being swapped out for Circuit Zolder on the other side of Belgium! Thoughts?" David asks out in the open.
"I" you start.
"Well I think" Ted also starts and you both look at each other in shock before laughing. You let Ted go first to say his piece.
"Well, I think it's no where near interesting as Spa, and especially where its the last race before a break... I think it's going to be way more uneventful than Spa!"
"Y/N?" Crofty asks looking at you.
"I actually think the opposite most of the tracks have been very high risk with lost of turns and chicanes and hairpins that really catch you out, however this reminds me of the simplicity of Monza and everyone, everyone loves Monza. So i think it will really even out the mid field cars" you says observing the track that had nice long straights and minimal turns.
"I agree with you there Y/N! Next after Zolder we head over to the heavily missed Nurburgring in Germany, the last time we saw it was 2019 so again, up until our 2019 rookies would have driven there how'd you feel about this track Y/N?" David asks.
"Well, it's such an iconic track for so many reasons I really wanted to race there after I watched Lando, George and Alex all race there in 2019, I was actually there in the paddock that year with Ferrari as a part of their driver development programme" you nod, explaining to them how excited you were for it.
"Now next in the place of Monza which we just mentioned we have a complete wild card of the Scandinavian Raceway in Sweden! Now this, this is one I'm excited for it's a beautiful track and has the coldest track temps we'll probably get all season! So it'll be a real fight to see who can protect their tyres and manage them well!" Ted explains and you nod, knowing it would be an exciting race.
"Then after that we travel to France where we haven't been for a while, however the Bugatti Au Mans Track in France is iconic, there are so many great tracks in France like Paul-Ricard or the Charade Circuit or Dijon de Prenois, all of them are great but the Bugatti hasn't been done is so long and really means a lot historically to the sport" David offers, showing you one of the only tracks you didn't feel too excited a lean towards.
"Then, we move back across to Aisa, going to an age of favorite of the age old Sepang International Circuit in Malasiya which is one fans have been wanting to see back on the race calendar for a while so i wonder if this will stay into 2027!" Ted takes over, and you nod.
"I'm also very excited for Sepang! After Malaysia we move onto the first ever FIA grade 1 race track the Chang Circuit in Thailand, how to we feel about this?" David asks directly looking at you.
"Not only is it a beautiful track, but it means that Alex now has a chance to race at his home track while racing under his home flag and I think he's really excited for it. He's in a great car, the Williams has come leaps and bounds and are top midfield contenders and definitely will be up there fighting for race wins!" you smile, knowing Alex was so happy to have this opportunity to race in his home country.
"I agree Alex Albon to win in Chang Circuit, I've put my money on it! Our next circuit it one that NASCAR share with us in F1 taking it back to the Indianapolis Speedway, on the lower F1 circuit of course rather than the Oval that the NASCAR drivers use!" Ted explains.
"Yeah, that lower track is great, you got the nice curve and we'll be able to get to those really high speeds. It's an iconic US track just like COTA!" you admit, taking a sip of the water you'd brought with you.
"After Indi, we'll make our way a little further down south to the Rio de Janiro International Track in Brazil, which is instead of Sao Paulo" David explains looking at the second F1 track in Brazil, it was a nice track but Sao Paulo had been on the roster for so long.
"Then, we are back in Las Vegas, but not on the Strp track that was created in 2023, no we are going back to the Ceaser's Palace Track and I know many people complain about these Las Vegas Grand Prix's because of the timings and the drivers not really liking driving at 12pm!"
"Yeah, i agree they are really strenuous just like Qatar for the heat but I love the vibe Las Vegas brings and I like the whole weekend with all the activities in the fan zone and yeah I'm excited they used Ceaser's Palace rather than the Pheonix Street Circuit which i know they were considering.
"I agree. Our last two races, then consist of the Buddah International Circuit in India and rounding off instead of in Yas Marina in the Dubai Autodrome, which will be a really nice round off" David exclaims.
Slowly you end the interview up, needing to go down to the track to get into the car for you leg of pre-season testing.
What a year it would be.
Taglist:
@littlesatanicassholebitch @hockey-racing-fubol @laura-naruto-fan1998 @22yuki @simxican @sinofwriting @lewisroscoelove @cmleitora @stupidandunnecessary @clayra-g @daemyratwst @honey-belden @moonypixel @lauralarsen @vader-is-hot @ironcowboycopnickel @itsjustkhaos @the-untamed-soul @beebo86 @happylittlereader @ziejustme @lou-larcher5 @thewulf @purplephantomwolf @chasing-liberosis @chillyleclerc @chanthereader @annoyingmoonballoon @summissss @evieepepi08 @havaneseoger08 @celesteblack08 @gulphulp @fandom1ruined2me @celebstories @starfusionsworld @jspitwall @sierruhh @georgeparisole @dakotatankbig @youcannotcancelquidditch @zzonsbeek @tallbrownhairsarcastic @mellowarcadefun @ourteenagetragedy @otako5811 @countingstacksandpanicattacks @peachiicherries @formulas-bitch @cherry-piee @hopexcroc @mirrorball-6 @spilled-coffee-cup @mehrmonga @bigsimperika @blueberry64857959 @eiraethh @lilypadlover @curseofhecate @alliwantisadonut @the-fem1n1ne-urge @21stcenturytaegi @dark-night-sky-99 @spideybv28 @i-wish-this-was-me @tallrock35 @butterfly-lover @barnestatic @landossainz @darleneslane @barcelonaloverf1life @r0nnsblog @ilove-tswizzle @kapsylia @laneyspaulding19 @lazybot @malynn @cassielikereading @viennakarma @teamnovalak @landosgirlxoxo @marie0v @jlb20416 @yourbane @teamnovalak @nikfigueiredo @fionaschicken @0picels0 @seomako @urdad-hot @formula1mount @tinydeskwriter @butterfly-lover @ironmaiden1313
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#formula 1 x you#formula 1#formula one#formula one fanfiction#lando norris imagine#lando norris#charles leclerc#charles lecrelc x reader#lewis hamilton#max verstappen x you#oscar piastri f1#alex albon fluff#alex albon imagine#lance stroll fanfic#lance stroll
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still alive | pato o' ward
summary: pato's girlfriend really likes halloween. in fact, it's her whole brand. especially since her dad starred in 'scream' and 'scooby-doo' and 'five nights at freddys'. like seriously, this holiday was made for her
pairing: pato o' ward x lillard! reader
yn.lillard just posted to her story!
yn.lillard just posted
liked by patriciooward, matthewlillardofficial, indycar and others
yn.lillard its the most wonderful time of the year
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patriciooward my skeleton gingerbreads are cooler than your skeleton gingerbreads
-> yn.lillard say sike rn! we all know mine are better. i can call my dad and he can be the deciding vote
-> patriciooward no need, i ate them all already anyways :)
-> yn.lillard i love you you big dork
-> patriciooward i know. but do you love me as much as you love billy loomis?
-> yn.lillard see it sounds odd when you remember that to me, he's just uncle skeet.
davidmalukas you got the pumpkins i got the paint and the hocus pocus dvd. what do you say we all meet at yn's dads and have ourselves a pumpkin painting party?
-> yn.lillard you just want to drink beers with my dad and uncle skeet, don’t you?
-> matthewlillardofficial how does friday sound?
user they give such black cat orange cat energy
patriciooward added to his story!
yn.lillard
halloween horror nights
tagged: patriciooward, elbaoward
liked by patriciooward, yourbestfriend, skeetulrich and others
yn.lillard its a hot ghoul summer!!! #hhn24
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elbaoward please tell me you got a video of pato screaming when the clown on stilts came up behind him
-> yn.lillard of course i did, i'm the best girlfriend ever
-> patriciooward delete that
-> yn.lillard what are you going to do to make it worth my while? 😏
patriciooward repeat after me: pato you are the sweetest most loveable man on planet earth. god created men and then sent me as an apology
-> yn.lillard someone has a big ego (i love you too sweetheart!)
alexanderrossi so where is this video of pato
-> patriciooward GONE
-> yn.lillard ill send it to u when im done jumping his bones
-> matthewlillardofficial YN YMN LILLARD
user theres so much hot in this post i dont know where to look
Pato O'Ward talks victory at Milwaukee, summer break with his girlfriend and the first time he met future father-in-law Matthew Lillard
yn.lillard and patriciooward
tagged: patriciooward
yn.lillard hey google, play i miss you by blink 182
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yourbestfriend i realize there was a specific lyric you were trying to reference there but it is not coming across right bestie
-> yn.lillard ok let me be more specific *clears throat* HELLO THERE THE ANGEL OF MY NIGHTMARES THE SHADOW IN THE BACKGROUND OF THE MORGUE
patriciooward we can live like jack and sally if we want and we'll have halloween on christmas ❤️
-> yn.lillard and in the night we'll wish this never ends, we'll wish this never ends
user oh that boy is so whipped
skeetulrich kid why did i just get a text message from lover boy here asking if i knew your ring size?
-> yn.lillard YOU WHAT
-> patriciooward no reason!! totally not planning something!!
-> matthewlillardofficial ahem. do we need to have a talk?
-> patriciooward nope! all good here!
yn.lillard just posted to her story
[location tag: calgary, alberta]
MESSAGES BETWEEN YN AND HER FATHER
daddy
I'm so proud of you, sweetheart. And remember, I still have the Ghostface costume so if you ever need me to get rid of him, just give me a call.
yn
DAD! I promise you'll never have to do that.
daddy
Good. I'm looking forward to having him as my son in law.
#pato o ward x reader#pato o ward smau#indycar x reader#indycar rpf#formula one x reader#indycar smau#the cozy collection 2024#Spotify#ig aus
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been having lots of babysitter! jonathan thoughts, so could you possibly do like cg!steve needs to go out for the day or has a long work day when little! reader is feeling really tiny and super fussy, so he has jonathan come over to babysit, maybe argyle is there too?
I just imagine he'd be really quiet and gentle with reader in babyspace and patient when they are nonverbal, just like sitting with them and giving them a bottle, and when they're feeling a bit better after being sad about steve being away so long, they have a dance party in the living room
(sorry if this is like way too long or if you dont write like babysitter stuff, theres absolutely no pressure!)
˚. ❝₊˚ last minute ❞ ˚₊·
» johnathan byers x reader
» a/n: omg this request is over a year old, I’m so sorry it’s taken me so long to get to 😭 also sorry I couldn’t fit everything you asked for in, I had trouble figuring out how to write jon
» warnings: fussy reader, crying, pet names, bottle feeding
You cling your hands tighter onto Steve’s yellow sweater, face stuffed into his chest, a wet spot of tears under you that’s only growing larger as he tries to hand you off to Johnathan.
“I’ll be back tonight, I swear baby.” Steve assures for the millionth time, it does nothing to help you calm down. You’ve dropped younger than normal and while Steve hadn’t wanted to leave you, Robin already called out with the flu so Steve doesn’t have the option of staying home. It’s hell for him to see you so distraught.
“No!” You cry and Steve lets out a sad sigh. It’s been five full minutes of you, Steve, and Johnathan standing in the doorway of Steve’s house waiting for you to let go of Steve and for Johnathan to take over caring for you as he’s the only one around that’s able to watch you on such short notice.
“It’s okay little one, we’ll have fun while Steve’s gone.” Johnathan ducks his head to meet your eyes when you turn your head against Steve’s pec, only offering a sniffle in reply to Johnathan.
“See? Jon’s a good caregiver, you guys will have a great day. Now I- I gotta go-.” Steve starts to pull you off of his chest and instantly more tears start to streak down your face, hiccuping cries leaving your throat as Johnathan takes over holding you on his hip.
“I’m so sorry, I’ll be back.” A kiss gets pressed to your forehead before Steve’s bounding down the driveway to his car, probably already ten minutes late for work, which is the only reason you decide not to put up much of a fight when Johnathan takes you inside.
“I know we don’t know each other that well but I want to help you and for today to be a good day. Is there anything you want that I can do to help?” Johnathan speaks softly, it reminds you of how Joyce talks to littles, kind and caring in that signature Byers way.
“Bottle?” You ask shyly but Johnathan instantly nods and hefts you up to get a more comfortable hold on you before walking to the kitchen.
Nothing is said as Johnathan makes the bottle, you point to the cabinets everything’s in and then lean against him as he starts to hum a song under his breath. The rumble of his chest is grounding in a way and lets your tears turn to sniffles before ceasing all together- you still miss Steve and wish he didn’t have to go to work- but Johnathan isn’t so bad.
“Let- let me know if I’m tipping it too much.” Johnathan says with a nervous undertone to his words, you know he has nothing to be nervous about, you’ve seen him take care of Nancy plenty of times and he’s never done anything to raise concern.
You nod anyways and latch onto the bottle once he holds it out for you. He has one bent arm under your head as you sit on Steve’s couch and his eyes don’t leave your face, gently scanning your features for discomfort as you suck down the drink, slower than you’d usually drink it. You’re honestly exhausted from earlier and don’t have the energy to move with the speed and eagerness you normally have.
“All set? Do you wanna watch a movie?” It’s obvious you’re close to falling asleep but Johnathan flicks the Tv on despite it, shifting to get more comfortable on the couch as he suspects you’ll fall asleep in the position you’re in right now.
“You can nap if you wanna.” The assurance is all you need to close your eyes and curl into Johnathan more, hoping you’ll sleep long enough that your emotions won’t be so intense when you wake up and maybe you can enjoy having Johnathan here more.
#jj writes#stranger things agere#little!reader#caregiver!johnathan byers#babysitter!johnathan byers#johnathan byers x reader#johnathan byers
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all that money's tempting... gosh. re4 og leon tries to distract you from the one thing you think could solve all your problems. nsfw mentions (duh) below <3
idk if this is like noncon or wtv it doesnt feel like it to me but theres a part where theres a misunderstanding or shit idfk i dont care im just tired and want this OUT of my head please.
<><><><>
it's asking you to grab it, you swear. if money had a voice it would be high-pitched and whiney, whispering foolish promises into your ear. beside you, leon nods at the watch commander as he exits the room, reasons as to why being unknown to you.
your focus is on the money, the wads of cash stacked neatly on the simple brown table. you imagine it wavering under the weight, unworthy of carrying what could quite easily, you argue, fix all life's problems.
"what would you do with a million dollars...?" you ask, at first absentmindedly but then straightening up as the other two in the room toss their stoic gazes to you immediately.
"we never go there, rookie," leon hisses. "too many officers lost that battle."
"but theoretically-"
"no 'theoretically'," the other officer, one of leon's colleagues, spits. "you know better than that."
"she was just-" your training officer attempts to defend.
"you siding with her, kennedy?" the guy raises an eyebrow. "didn't think you were up for that life."
"the life of crime you came from?" leon seethes in reply. "i seem to recall your multiple violations and all the favors you called in." he frowns. "from me."
that shuts the asshole up pretty quickly, and you have to smother a smile as you gaze up, admiration twinkling in your eyes as you stare at his side profile. handsome and sharp. lucky you.
you suppose the only downside to the whole arrangement is the way he switches up, two different people forced to occupy the same body; and you'd rather have the calm one over the shouty one.
the officers' radios go off, the watch commander's voice coming through. he calls in an attempted break in somewhere near our units, and tells someone to respond.
you look between both of them, waiting for someone to make a move. leon crosses his arms and huffs, leaning back against the supporting column. the other officer rolls his eyes and grumbles something under his breath as he approaches the door.
"what was that?" leon calls out, sarcastically, if anything.
the only response he gets is the loud slam of the door, frightening some poor bird perched on the birdhouse stuck to the window. it doesn't flutter back, no matter how hard you stare.
"well?" you divert your gaze back to the money, at first, then to the man standing next to you.
"hm?" you ask, slightly in a daze.
"you asked what i would do with that money, but what would you?" leon scoffs. "after all, it's not like you to ask without a motive."
"does everything require a motive, officer kennedy?" you ask, teasingly, tantalizing his mind. he narrows his eyes.
"i asked a question, rookie."
a dreamy sigh falls past your lips. not the reply he was expecting. "i would pay off all that student debt, and buy myself a nice house. ooh, and a fancy sports car!"
leon snorts to this, and you turn to him with accusing eyes. "what?"
"i'm just saying, you've got a lot to live through if that's all you're hoping for."
"what part of paying off debt is useless?" you demand.
"i never said anything was useless." he shrugs.
you grit your teeth and turn away from him, but your eyes are once again drawn back to the money. you take a step closer, fingers itching to just pocket a few rolls, wondering if anyone will notice.
leon's arm acts as a bar across your waist, covered in black tactical gear, and his rifle slips from his other hand. the sound snaps you out of your trance, and you turn to glare at him.
"i wasn't going to take anything," you protest.
the corner of leon's mouth turns up. "oh, really? try fooling me twice, sweetheart. i know the look of a hungry woman when i see one."
"i'm not... hungry?" you tilt your head, confused by the metaphor.
"never mind. i think i'd retire early, if i had all that just saved in the bank. why spend my years wasting away, like i did in my youth?" he chuckles fondly, as if those years were millennia ago.
"you're barely forty," you deadpan. "you're not that old."
"compared to you?" leon's arm hasn't left its position, if anything pressing harder down onto your waist, forcing you back. there's a conflicted storm swirling in his eyes, unchecked by you. "i think i am."
"right... what are you doing?" you whisper.
"i see those eyes," he mumbles. "you can't stop thinking about it, can you?"
"the money? no, leon, gosh, i swear i wouldn't-"
"wouldn't you?" his voice is his own harsh whisper in your ear, backed against the table, the empty one that has no expectations except dreading what comes next, because what happens?
in the carefully planned sequence of your life, all the events that you'd prepared for, this is NOT one of them. never was supposed to be. and so because you've never studied anything like this, you freeze up.
leon feels you tense underneath him. "what's... wrong?"
"can you... uhm... get off me?" you say, voice squeaky. "please?"
"oh." leon blinks down at you, and the second time something seems to register because he clambers off, dusting his pants as a filler motion, trying to make the atmosphere casual. "s-sorry."
"n-no, you're fine," you say, reassuringly, but your voice is wavering. not out of fear, out of adrenaline. your body was preparing, it seems. it wants this. you want this, and you might've just ruined it.
you also never imagined anything happening here, in this drug dealer's home, where anyone could burst through the door at any given moment, but he's gotten enough blood rushing to your head that you can't stop the force of events that come tumbling next.
there's a whole list of words you have to describe him now, and they all fall past your lips as his fingers creep further down, duty long forgotten. you suppose that's the whole reason he's doing this.
for you, all for you, to distract you from ruining your life thinking you're going to fix it, when you'll only make things worse. besides, the desire for him is stronger than the desire for a nice life.
a life with him would be nice, you think, absently.
"oh, would it now?" he muses against your neck, damn fingers never moving any lower than they are, pressed taut from the force of your pants, against the lower skin of your stomach. "you wanna be mine forever?"
god, yes, you think, and this time you make sure it's just a thought. the last thing you need is for his inflated ego to get ahead of him.
"he was being so mean to you, baby," he whispers, and it takes you a moment to clear the cloudy thoughts and realize he's talking about the other officer. "never liked him anyway."
you nod your head for lack of a better response, immediately leaning back as soon as leon's other palm flattens against your inner thigh, sparking up your spine.
"you like that?" he says, low and breathy, just for you to hear. "what if someone was to come in, hm? what then? they see you all spread out like this, almost about to cum on my fingers?"
"yeah," you whine, and for the first time in a long time, you're really not ashamed of the sounds he elicits from you. usually sounds of dissent, now pleas for more. "need it, please."
you wait for his acceptance, for him to push you over the edge, just like he does every day out on patrol, except this time you know you'll like it. but it never comes, and you crack open an eye, panting.
leon blinks, and you swear that if he was a dog his ears would be twitching, because within a second he yanks his hand away, covering your arousal with his other hand, and you're confused for a moment.
you sit on the table as he stands to attention, facing the door. you don't realize why until the entire squad storms through, rifles aimed at the ready.
the watch commander raises a fist and everyone lowers their guns. "the neighbors reported loud noises and disturbing sounds. did you happen to hear anything?"
"... no sir." leon says, shaking his head in such an affirmative way that you can't help but copy his actions, bobbing your head up and down with a bright smile.
"we didn't hear anything," you add. "must've been a raccoon or something."
sergeant's eyes flick between you two, narrowing in suspicion. "of course. a raccoon."
"what else could it be?" leon says with a shrug.
"i have my suspicions." with that, he turns on his heel. and you think you're in the clear, about to let out a sigh of relief, when he jerks back.
"is something the matter, sergeant?" you ask sweetly. but his eyes aren't on you, thankfully. your heart plummets when you track his gaze to his true target.
"officer kennedy." there's an undeniable hint of irritation that is quickly overshadowed by the authority in his stance as he slowly turns around, eyes flitting to his waist.
"yes, sir?" leon's damn good at acting, but you're sure no musical will get him out of this one.
"what's in your hands?"
series masterlist
#leon kennedy#resident evil#leon s kennedy#leon kennedy x reader#resident evil 4#leon scott kennedy#leon kennedy fanfic#leon kennedy smut#re4r leon#leon resident evil#resident evil leon#resident evil vendetta#vendetta leon#leon kennedy x reader smut#resident evil x reader
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Hey sorry i am trying to like. find examples of what you mean when you talk about mra stuff and (trans)misogyny in forcemasc content and tumblr search has betrayed me once again, can you explain?
(sorry I normally wouldn't ask but I wanna make sure I'm not perpetuating anything!! Also fucking tumblr search!!! it is ridiculous!)
so ive been sitting on this ask for months since ive got it. i want to do it justice and try to take it at face value that its being honest in asking.
The thing is, theres this trend and a weird amount of effort to be like force femme, to be forceful and like its something to fearful of and give in to. But we cant do that, cause all that does is reinforce the idea that being a man is a toxic thing. I saw this post the other day where a transman talked about like, the whole "raised as a weapon" thing, the violence and horror of being a man and raised that way versus how they felt growng into it as a transman. How they wanted to reclaim that phrase or something? i could be misremembering.
But that was never the intent of forcemasc. It wasnt actually about being a dude, literally *forcing* someone who was unwilling into masculinity, none of the posts that i made that started the community (and yes i, a transfem butch woman, started and made this community and some of yall need to get over yourselves) were ever about that, it was intended to be a soft mimic or even a call to forcefemme.
i was all about making it soft and tender for a reason, cause if i didnt i was only reinforcing the toxic masculinity narrative, "men fighting in the mud" "men are dominant and cool" " to be a man is to be forced into masculinity and to be disgusted with the feminine" or whatever. When masculinity isnt about just men, and being butch isnt just being masculine. masculinity should also be sensitivity, not domination. i wanted it to be better, show a better side of what masculinity could be, what being butch is.
Ive spoken before a bit too, about the tags people used and added to forcemasc, and really maybe i was wrong in ever naming it forcemasc. people used and still use tags like autoandrophilia, autoandrophile, androphile, autogynephilia, androphilia, and autogynephile. Ive seen so many people with urls and tags and posts calling themselves transandrobros, literally calling themselves MRAs, as if that was something to be proud of, as if they dont understand that they arent fighting for their and our rights, they're fighting for cis-mens rights by using those names and terms, not transmascs/transmens rights. I can understand ignorance, but weve talked about how the words you use have history, especially those like the tags i mentioned and androphilia and androphobia and others, all of them have roots in deeeeeeeply misogynistic and transphobic people and history.
Literally all of these are awful and are phrases that arent and wont be reclaimed because theyre history is one of pain and hurting trans people, one of coercive 'help', literal forced detransitioning and reinforcement of MRA and terf narrative that men are both good and the worst creature alive and that to be a woman is to be disgusting and the purest thing all at once. That to be a transwoman is sick and we shouldnt be trusted.
Im trying to be very kind, not scream and rage, not because i dont desperately want to, but because if i do, as a butch transwoman, ESPECIALLY cause i claim being butch, people wont listen to me no matter how much of what i say is meaningful. one of the reasons why im doing this NO, instead of in anothr day or two, is that im coming to terms with the fact that the situation will just get qorse, not better without words.
Part of why im still sane is that ive gotten a couple asks here and there about how my posts and creation of the community has helped them and its so wonderful to see that, genuinely so amazing to see people recontextualize and love themselves. its wonderful and im so fucking happy about it.
i personally made this space so i could love myself, who i am as a trans person and my body, and i knew that other people needed and wanted that for themselves too and i wanted to help, share this love with more people. That to be hairy and chubby and masculine and butch was a nice thing. But to me it feels like it was coerced into being a thing for Men. A thing no longer for me or people like me who share the butch culture and name to no longer enjoy cause people unfamiliar with kink and tran history have decided that masculinity and butchness are the exact same thing. Id say people should go be a bear, but you wont learn their culture either and thats cruel and insulting to bears.
We deserve better You deserve better. Stop falling for the lies and hate. We beg you
#forcemasc#the dragon replies#the dragon speaks#the dragon roars#force masculinization#force masc#force masc founder#forcemasc founder#ask me stuff#ask me things#transmisogny//#im tired#ill probably make a new tag to post new content under#ill also turn off anons#gonna keep asks in general on tho
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g e n s o. - 1 5
its a short one yall
you watch him eat quietly before speaking out,
"so uh.. what time did you end the call yesterday night?" you fiddle with your earring, "when i woke up it said the call only lasted for an hour so.." you trail off glancing at him.
he swallows thickly, "it was nothing-"
you purse your lips, "your lying.." you look at him. "theres something your not saying.."
"fuck off genso. you dont need to know everything" he spat continuing to eat his food.
you widen your eyes, "w-well.. im sorry but- i want to know because out of everyone you chose to call me and actually get along with me yesterday, but for some damn reason today you wanna act like an ass and ignore me!" you exclaim.
"you did this to me before we even came to UA..! you- you made me promise you to make it to UA so we could be friends again and you just-" you tear up frustrated.
he glances at you quietly before placing his plate down. "dont cry- dammit.." you grunts, running a hand through his untamed hair.
you wipe your tears before they fall, "im not-" you say defensively as you glance the other way.
"genso i-" he starts, "look i didnt go to school today because i was up all night thinking of something- or well someone.." he explains, avoiding eye contact with you.
you widen your eyes, "oh."
should you be feeling... hurt? why did it sting when he said he was thinking of someone? was this normal?
"who..?" you ask, your throat suddenly becoming dry.
he glances up at you before turning back down to his food. "i-" he croaks.
"i dont think she deserves to have someone like me.." he responds. you swear you see his eyes tear up, but dont question it.
"oh kats- bakugou-" you start.
"call me katsuki, not bakugou. weve known each other far too long for you to call me my surname." he mumbles.
"well what happened to that after i finished middle school" you mumble a bit harshly. you turn away from him lowly.
"genso. i didnt want distractions- i had to make it in for u-" he stops abruptly as he admits it.
you widen you eyes and snap your head to him. "for me..?" you ask softly. he grumbles nodding slightly, "oh.. well- even if you meant no harm, you couldve said something you know? it really sucked if im being honest..." you admit rubbing your arm.
"i know.. i kinda fucked up the execution.." he chuckles.
you nod, "yea.." you say agreeing with a small smile, "but uh- ill call you katsuki i guess.. i can understand why you did it.. i kinda got into UA for our promise too.." you admit quietly.
he cant help but smirk slightly, "oh?"
you smack his arm, "hush- now tell me who the girl is" u say with a tiny smile.
he curses lowly staring at the food before placing it down and turning to you. you adjust to face him too.
"oh for fucks sake.." he pauses, "genso- no- y/n... i-" he tears up.
you widen your eyes. he called you by your actual name.
"y/n.. i dont know how to tell you this- and this may come off as forward or quick but, i fucking cant stop thinking about you." he says blinking his eyes causing tears to roll down.
"i dont know what to do anymore because it physically hurts me to think of you a-and- im scared you hate me. i feel like you deserve someone so much better then me-" he sobs slightly.
your heart lurches at the sight and suddenly you wrap your arms around his shoulders, bringing him close to your chest. "dont." you say softly, cutting him off.
his body shakes against yours as he buries his face in your neck. you rub his back softly, "katsuki.. weve been friends since we were in kindergarten.. yes, we have had our rough patches, but who doesnt?"
you pause bringing his face up and wiping his tears, "i dont hate you, if anything i like you so much it frustrates me." you admit.
he looks up at you, "really..?"
you nod, "really. how can i hate my best friend..?" you ask softly with a small smile.
he grabs your hands that are on his face and bring them down to press a soft kiss on the palm of your hand. "promise?" he mumbles into your hand.
you chuckle,
"promise katsuki.."
previous parts: pt. 0 0 / pt. 0 1 / pt. 02 / pt. 03 / pt. 04 / pt. 05 / pt. 06 / pt. 07 / pt. 08 / pt. 09 / pt. 10 / pt. 11 / pt. 12 / pt. 13 / pt. 14 next part: your all caught up for now!
☆taglist! @katszumi @coolgirl458 @niktwazny303 @twinnintwink @froggybich @friedmagazineprincess @itztaki
#mha#bakugo katsuki#my hero academia#bakugou katsuki#bakugou x reader#bnha bakugou#kacchan#kacchan bakugou#katsuki bakugo mha#katsuki bakugo x reader#katsuki bakugou#katsuki bakugo#mha bakugou#katsuki#bnha bakugo katsuki#bakugo#bakugo katuski#bakugou x you#katsuki x reader#katsuki x you#bakugou x y/n#katsuki x y/n#mha fanfiction#mha x reader#my hero acedamia#boku no hero academia#t3ag3rs
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How some characters would go about courting Paimons mama
VENTI:
-you would pick up on your daughter calling Barbatos,The god of freedom,the anemo archon,"tone deaf bard",made you hold in a laugh not be disrespectfull
-Venti will think that you agree with him being tone deaf and feel sadness wash over him,do you not like his songs? He'll be better at them he promises!
-god your daughter knew that she would get away with it,not just cause shes a child,but cause shes your child
-you reassure him dont worry and his happy
-but man dudes is love starved
-he clungs onto you like a new born (if you allow him to even be near you)
-Paimon isnt too thrilled about him acting like hes your kid,she is,you came down here to reunite with her
-Paimon wouldnt mind a second parent,that means more love,and you'll be happier (you did tell you wouldnt leave her again)
-but Venti? Yeah no,mans has to prove himself one way or another
-he will sing Paimon and you so many songs
-spoil you with everything he can (he admitted being Barbatos to be able to have VIP acess to you like all the other archons and important people)
-Paimon and him share a playfull tone and would absolutely mess with others,so this might actually work
-what do you say your grace? Venti is already worshiping you like never before
ZHONGLI:
-1# follower comin' throught
-hes so polite and devoted,being your slave would be such an honor to him,but being your husband? Your daughters father?
-he doesnt care who he has to go through
-Paimon doesnt know if she wants a dad whos so bad with the literal thing he made from his hands
-Zhongli will serve you and praise you theres no tomorow,Paimon aswell
-hes telling her the best tales he knows,spending way too much on food and toys (thats more like a point for childe but-)
-his shield is on him 24/7 with either of you with him in the wild
-but like you have power over all the elements and slay so like dont know why he does this but oh well
-he is and always will be your most devoted your grace, isnt that worth something?
CHILDE:
-spoils you and Paimon
-Zhongli isnt getting that much money from him cause now hes competiton
-Paimon and Teucer deffinetly are having playdates to get to know eachother and have fun
-they might end up being family if Childe succeds after all
-Paimon didnt like the idea of you marrying a fatui harbinger,so childe is on thin ice
-but Paimon is only so young,she could be convinced easily
-he is such a family man,hes perfect to be her father and your lover
-hes killed so many in your name,and he will leave the fatui if you wish,just consider it
TRAVELER:
-this is probably the easiest and we all know why
-they were with your daughter for so long,no one knows them like you both do,its only natural
-Paimon will however go "oh come on! Not you too! Why is everyone so intrested in Paimons mom!?"
-after all you both have control over all the elements in a way,so theyre perfect
-you took them as a vessel for a reason,right?
-but abyss twin?
-alot of drama
-Paimon is gonna tell them that if they even wish to be near you,theyd have to reconcile and apologize to the traveler!
-"say less" Paimon isnt even able to finish her sentence
-but yeah things will be difficult but oh well
#genshin impact sagau#genshin impact#sagau#genshin sagau#yandere genshin x reader#genshin impact childe#genshin impact venti#genshin impact zhongli#genshin impact traveler#abyss twin#sagau childe#sagau zhongli#sagau venti#sagau traveler#genshin impact paimon#paimon#sagau paimon
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Can you please tell us more about Neo4. What's their background.
“I need your help.”
Thing is -- I dont exactly own that character! Hes owned by @pastille-pain ... I asked them abt his deets, so here it is under the readmore!
His recruitment by 3 is also under the readmore :) (+more notes abt pre-sploon3)
(From my pal)
My Precious Soy Sauz
Aka croissant
Where he comes from is inkopolis
Lived there his whole life actually. A very sheltered kid due to being raised by grandparents that were in Octaria at one point. So they wanted to make sure nothing really happened to him
An only child but he had his cousin (Nakji, Takoyaki) of the three, he'd be the middle child with Nakji and the youngest.
He's got two friends (three if we count malachite -- the smallfrt) outside of the platoon. Dulce, and (unfortunately) Scara
He dating Melon (oc of mine), we know this
Kinda funny it started as her just battling with him cause he was good but then it turned something more
His time before the platoon was mostly
"Hey are you related to that Sauz idol?" Or "hey, you related to that Sauz wrestler?" It got annoying very quickly so he started introducing himself as croissant and nothing else
Aside from that, if he wasn't turfing he was at home reading or watching shows. Guys a very boring person
He's a pretty big OTH fan...
All this above is still the same even while being apart of the platoon minus the constant questions about his relatives and adding college into the mix
He can do some really cool shit when he's focused (like absolutely demolish competition in turf) but he's also easily distracted so I think you can imagine how that goes
His stress relief is shopping (mostly window shopping, very rarely does he actually buy anything)
He never gets too mad but we know the face if he does
Fun fact, you will never catch this man in pants
Short and anything else
Not pants
The only time he's ever seen wearing pants is in his agent gear and that's cause it's what was given to him.
-----------------------
Heres a bonus too, of 3s recruitment of him!
It was a turfing match, and theyve been watching the krak-on user the whole round. They took note of how he responded to stress, to bad calls, and how he acted on his own following calls he had judged as bad. Once it was over, they followed the team into the lobby.
They stand tall against the doorframe theyre leaning against, presence as cold and as commanding as ever.
(Nevermind that Croissant is taller AND older than them, that squid is intimidating as FUCK)
A whistle, calling the team over.
"|May I have a word?|" they sign, "|Ive been watching your team turf for the last few rounds.|"
Scara, the team captain, spits a "Who the FUCK are you."
3s eyebrows raise in surprise. But they should expect it... casual turfers dont usually know their name.
They went to the smaller leagues for a reason. If something happened to a big name in the scene, and its found that they had something to do with it-
No. No. They mentally shake their head. They are NOT picking this person because they are going to be fucking canon fodder.
"|Who I am is not important. Not much, anyway.
I am... interested in one of your teammates.|"
a nod towards Croissant. "|As a krak-on user myself, his performance has impressed me.|"
"Has he now. You seen our losses?? Are you making fun of us??"
"|He has great potential.|" they sign, ignoring the outburst. "|I would like to...|" theres a slight pause. "|...train with him.|"
"I can train my team perfectly, all by myself. Get lost."
They give a cold stare back. "|Im sure that has worked very well for you thus far.|"
The captain didnt seem to want to back down. 3 continues, ear twitching.
"|This request was not aimed towards you, anyway. Im asking him.|"
"BUT-"
"|I want to hear HIS answer.|"
A test. 3 saw that Scara was pushing him around and the only reason they won the match was bc Croissant decided to go his own way. Will he go his own way now?
"Well I know he'll choose to stick with me-"
"Oh I'd love to train with you I like helping others :D"
"You weren't supposed to say that."
3 nods. "|It begins now. Come. We have much to discuss. And as for you.|"
They clack their beak. "|Captain to captain. You need to listen to your teammates more.|"
-----------------------
Once they are in a more private space...
"|Training is only one part of the deal.
I apologize for not being upfront. This is a matter of national security, and I cannot mention much about it beyond base.|"
I suppose Croissant hasnt heard...or at least, isnt into much of the so-called Hero of Inkadia thats plastered everywhere in Inkopolis? If he was, hed at least start thinking of all that being like... "wait all that media was based on something real???"
(3 mentioning national security and a base may also inspire thoughts of "wow this squid's a fucking nerd...")
"|You are free to reject my request if you feel unfit for the task at hand. But where are my manners? I have yet to formally introduce myself.
Topside, I am known as FOR3VRFRSH. Here, I am the Captain of the New Squidbeak Splatoon.
I suppose youve heard of such a force...? No?|
Mm.
|Just know that we keep Inkadia more or less safe from nation-destroying threats.|"
He accepts the offer... but he also wasn't thinking too hard on it cause he saw an opportunity to step away from Scara and took it immediately.
3 nods, beckoning him towards the sewer line. As they walked backwards into base, they signed to him. "|From this point onwards, you will be referred to as Agent...Four.|"
Theres a very slight waver of their hand as they signed the number.
"|You show much promise, from what Ive observed in turf. Dont disappoint me.|"
"The only person I disappoint is that guy, but he's just very critical-"*
Theres a glint in 3s eye, a look of amusement... "|...Overly critical is putting it lightly.|"
"I promise to do my best still."
-----------------------
3 introduces him as the new Agent 4 and I feel Marie just scrunches her nose a bit. Then sees the look in 3s eye...
To the folks from the regions around 3s home (Callie, Marie, Cuttlefish), theyre not subtle about missing her.
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i think something like season 8's moon big thing is going to happen again this season-
in several magical mountain people's recent episodes (i remember mumbo mentioning it a couple episodes back and grian as well? not sure who else) they've mentioned that something weird/something big feels like its happening in the world (grian even made a straight up moon big reference) but i think this time it's going to be something with the ocean
this kind of starts at the very beginning of the season and follows through. in grian's very first episode he calls magical mountain a volcano and that idea has followed through and now they're hollowing it out. in another episode when he gets flung up in the air he makes a moon big reference. soo early season ideas/references seem to be following through to now
in episode 2, grian gathers a crowd of people (gem, etho, impulse, skizz, ren, cleo, cub) and they all just chat and fish and make jokes about how the ocean can get you addicted to fishing and pretend the ocean is a higher being that will provide fishing rods to those it sees worthy (we also see it a bit in the end of grians episode 1) eventually leading to ren saying "i don't know why im doing this but i don't want to stop" and cleo agreeing. etho originally had also been skeptical but quickly got dragged into the shenanigans and very happy with getting lily pads for some reason? it's just a fun random interaction but some of those things can lead to lore.
etho also says in this interaction "dont drink the koolaid" because gem randomly suggests to all eat a pufferfish which i don't fully understand the phrase but it comes from a guy who made a cult and lured his followers out into a jungle (etho loves jungles) and because cults always have a like Date where they believe their higher power is coming to save them and commit mass suicide on that day, the guy made a lot of poisoned koolaid and everyone died. so cults
in gem's most recent episode (19) she builds an artists house and says the artist looks out on the water for inspiration but as a result has become quite paranoid.
in season 8 they have a cult of people not sleeping because they think the moon is a higher power come to save them or something and early season 10 was a cult of people fishing, not to mention that certain patterns seem to repeat every other season (season 7 and 9 were both really long, in season 9 people were nostalgic for season 7 and in season 8 people were nostalgic for season 6 and certain storylines that could have some parallels drawn not to mention that everyone compares season 7 and 9 for the length and says that they were incredibly long perhaps suggesting that this season might be a bit shorter? its also the fact that in season 7 and 9 everyone built Starter Bases and then moved out to larger bases but in season 8 and now season 10 they seem to have made starter homes and expanded on them while still living out of their day one builds)
basically, tldr: something big is happening and i think the oceans doing it
theres something in the water and its making the freaking frogs gay (its making the block people all do __punk or east asian vibe stuff and bureaucratic/public service-y)
#something big is happening#the koolaid story is interesting but slightly irrelevant#fishing is a cult#hc s10#hermitcraft#hc10#hc s8#hermitcraft 8#its just a theory#a game theory#grian#ethoslab#geminitay#zombiecleo#rendog#cubfan135#impulsesv#skizzleman#mumbo jumbo#magical mountain#moon big#boatem#pixls things
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okay so here is her review: https://arkadymartine.wordpress.com/2015/09/27/the-traitor-baru-cormorant-a-reviewresponse/
admittedly its from 2015- i haven't poked around to see how she may have changed how she feels about it, and i know she did blurb seth's recent scifi novel (Exordia), so there's no bad blood there or anything. it's also a positive review, in general- she ends with this sentence: "I highly, highly recommend this book; I have not thought so much about something I read in a long time."
i am also coming into this as someone who has read all of seth dickinson's work for the game destiny, where he was near-singlehandedly responsible for a good oh… 80% of the interesting women (& overall interesting concepts lol!) in the game, and his writing of one of those characters in particular as a complex and flawed character got him bullied viciously off of all social media. if you've tried to find his social media presence and havent found anything, that's why. so i mayhaps have a little more emotion in the game.
THAT SAID. here are some specific parts from her review i find really fucking annoying! and color the way i feel about Memory & Desolation, despite them being so incredibly targeted at me as a classics person AND someone who fucking loves the specific sub-genre of scifi her novels are.
"[Traitor] asks a question which I find compelling as a student of an empire and as a queer woman. That question is: what do we gain by complicity? What do we – we barbaroi, we women, we queer people, we imperialized – what do we get when we say yes? When we say yes I will hide my true nature? When we say yes I will subsume myself into the beautiful machine? When we say can we speak English? Or the literature I love just happens to be written by straight white men – and mean it, too, mean it with the kind of depthless love that a person can have for a text that speaks to them, which holds up a mirror to them?"
i dont think the use of the greek word for barbarian does anything here (she also keeps coming back to the greek term orthos in her review, which also pisses me off lol), i dont think empire is a "beautiful machine," and i don't think the invocation of identity politics is useful. like. i know she's a byzantine scholar but if your first association with empire is purely a finite Historical Empire instead of, like, modern US imperialism, or British colonialism, you are going into this discussion with a certain set of values and opinions! a set of values and opinions that let you call an empire a "beautiful machine" in all earnestness. this claim probably seems unsubstantiated and nitpicky now just from this excerpt but ill come back to it with more i promise. on the idpol front, she also says immediately after this that she does believe that straight people can and should write queer people, but that they should listen to queer people when they point out those errors. she then continues:
"But then, critique: there are two points on which I think Dickinson’s portrayal of a queer protagonist has faltered, and I think both of these errors arise from the fact that he isn’t part of – as far as I know at the time of writing this review – a queer community. Firstly, I disbelieve Baru’s awareness of her own desires… …For the first portion of the book, her queerness felt more like a character trait assigned to her for reason of plot than a naturally built part of her as a person… Secondly, I wonder where queer people in Falcrest are…"
theres more to these excerpts, but. i personally didnt find the depiction of baru's desire to be unrealistic, and also this was a review of Traitor, specifically, so where on earth would baru have heard about queer people in falcrest? and more importantly, why should we care so much about queer people in the imperial core? moreover i think the way seth does it with svir is very very well done, and illustrates the hypocrisy of empire in a way that does NOT seem like what martine is asking for here!!!
"Why am I invested? I myself am a student of empire. I’m a Byzantinist. My academic work is about empire and its seductions; it is the animating principle of my professional life. And: I am myself someone who loves order over disorder. Who looks for systems in all things. Who is comforted by structures; who is concerned deeply with propriety. But here’s my real criticism of this book: I don’t buy the seduction of the Masquerade. And I think if this book fails, it’s there: in that its empire is too easily read as undesirable. As profane, unethical, fundamentally wrong. It is really overtly evil." … "The Masquerade isn’t civilized. It’s civilization, but I don’t recognize it as civilized, and this is a problem with a constructed empire. An empire relies on itself as the definition of civilization – I would footnote here Ann Leckie’s Imperial Radch as a SFnal example of an empire which is built on this principle, and which, for this reader at least, achieves the facsimile. (But then my ancestors were not enslaved, we were exterminated; not annexed, but exiled. Perhaps I like the Radch better than the Masquerade because I can find a place for myself in it, and cannot imagine a place within the Masquerade someone like me would ever be safe –)"
and THIS. THIS RIGHT HERE IS MY BIGGEST PROBLEM. critiquing the masquerade as not "seductive" enough, calling it too evil to have people join it- how does someone miss the point THIS badly??? like. are you FUCKING serious??? how do you read a book about the immense violence of colonialism and your problem is that it is boohoo too violent for people to join willingly. google literally fucking anything the US has done ever!!! and the invocation of the concept of "civilized" as an objective quality, despite the recognition that the empire constructs what counts as "civilization" is so fucking unserious/simplistic/juvenile! why do you need to imagine yourself a place in the empire? in the imperial core specifically!
and i think this particular approach bleeds into her books. i read them at Least 2 years ago, so this is mostly vibes-based, and i will avoid spoilers.
there is such a focus on the allure of the imperial core, on the "beautiful machine" of the empire as she calls it. there is violence done, but it is abstracted away from the wealth of the imperial core. there are no economics there. the empire sees her independent station as a backwater, and there is some cultural tensions there, but there is no realistic violence and exploitation! it is not clear at all what maintains the empire, besides some abstract idea of trade. i also don't know what her Point is with the naming & language conventions, which are very clearly inspired in part by ancient Mayan- e.g. the empire and core planet are called Teixcalaan. and idk this may be reductive of me but i think if you are going to pull features from civilizations that have been colonized and use them to inspire fictional colonizing forces, you ARE saying something there! idk! and like, the ancient Mayan
and on the ~representation~ front, i also don't think she does a better job than seth tbqh!!! i felt like the characters getting together came out of nowhere and felt anticlimactic- there is also not the tension i think there should be with the main character being an ambassador-ish and the love interest being… idr. junior intelligence officer iirc? idk! and for all her critique of baru's desire for women not feeling "real" or present enough, i do not remember the main character in Memory having any real focus on it!
i enjoyed Memory just fine, but i don't think it says anything interesting or novel or even critical about empire, and i found her review of Traitor extremely shallow and useless, if very revealing about her own outlook on empire lol!!!
this has been at best Minorly proofread and edited but im not like, writing an academic essay on the matter and so i apologize for any inconsistencies.
oh man thanks for this this is really interesting. i went and read the whole thing and i agree a ton with your critique. i'm going to stick my thoughts below the cut because i went on for a bit here, in typical fashion.
i personally didnt find the depiction of baru's desire to be unrealistic, and also this was a review of Traitor, specifically, so where on earth would baru have heard about queer people in falcrest? and more importantly, why should we care so much about queer people in the imperial core?
NO BUT EXACTLY... for starters this is explicitly a novel about colonized people taking place in a colony where none of the major characters are from the empire. where, when, and how would we take the time to explore what queerness looks like for them and more importantly, like you've asked, why the hell should that be a priority for the narrative in this case.
in terms of 'i found this to be an unrealistic depiction of queer desire' 9/10 times i feel like what that means is 'i found this to be an unrelatable depiction' which is an entirely different critique. i know i'm working with two additional books worth of context that martine isn't working with here. but even taking into account just the characterization we have for baru in traitor i think this is suuuuch an unfair complaint. i'm gonna pull the entire quote she says about baru's sexuality here because i have additional specific gripes with it.
Firstly, I disbelieve Baru’s awareness of her own desires. In the first portion of the book, I do not ever feel the weight of Baru’s own awareness of her sexuality; there is an absence of carnality, a kind of intellectual version of lesbian desire which is, to me, inconsistent with the sort of desire I expect. Not until the introduction of Baru’s eventual lover Tain Hu do I get a sense of Baru as a woman who loves women. Further, considering how very much the Empire of Masks and Increastic philosophy criminalizes the sin of queer desire, I wish Baru had struggled more with the nature of her desire. For the first portion of the book, her queerness felt more like a character trait assigned to her for reason of plot than a naturally built part of her as a person. This markedly improved in the second half, where Baru notices women in a way she does not notice men.
For starters, it is insanely hypocritical to me to complain that her desire both isn't carnal enough and she processes it too intellectually, but that she isn't struggling enough with it. Baru intellectually processes things! That's her entire character from the getgo! She also has a difficult time conceptualizing other people as fully realized beings with their own agency. These character traits paired together don't make for a particularly passionate and carnal relationship to her sexuality. She is also, at her absolute oldest in this book, 21! (Or 22? I can't remember. I know she spends 3 years in aurdwynn) and has spent her entire youth being groomed to be a scholar. Of course detached intellectualism is her primary way of navigating all things. Why wouldn't it be?
Baru primary motivation is to save taranoke, she wants to save the taranoki way of life, and part of that way of life includes an acceptance of nonhetero nonmonogamous relationships. Sure, a different character arc may have involved baru actually internalizing and then having to break free of the trappings of race, gender, and sexuality that the empire tries to impose upon its citizens. but that's not baru and acting like this is a writing flaw rather than a character choice is insane to me.
There's absolutely no reason for Baru to lie awake at night pontificating about how wrong and dirty of her it is to want to have sex with women because we are never lead to believe even for a minute that Baru puts any emotional weight in incrasticism. She doesn't conceptualize it as sinful she conceptualizes it as illegal!
And "Not until the introduction of Baru’s eventual lover Tain Hu do I get a sense of Baru as a woman who loves women. " is killing me in particular because like. Yeah. Tain Hu is baru's first love. thats the point. But beyond that this is just not being able to see anything other than what she's looking for because i think the chapters covering baru's childhood make it pretty clear that her feelings for aminata and cousin lao (im not double checking the name but im pretty sure it was this) are deep and strong. the fact that they're not as explicitly and straightforwardly romantic and sexual as her relationship with tain hu doesn't change that, and in fact, points to baru's struggle with/development of her sexuality that she claims was somehow missing in this book.
like i just simply can't see anything here but someone who is seeing an emotional landscape they can't relate to and assuming that means it's flawed writing. skill issue frankly.
She's also fucking insane for acting like the masquerade is too cartoonishly evil to be appealing. once again im going to post her full quote here because i think its important to see
its empire is too easily read as undesirable. As profane, unethical, fundamentally wrong. It is really overtly evil. It punishes sexual “deviants” with mutilation and death. It murders children callously. It inflicts plague and withholds vaccines. It lobotomizes its own emperors for the sake of convincing its populace that the emperor is just. Most of all, the Masquerade is a eugenicist empire: it is explicitly founded on not purity of bloodline but on purification of bloodline, on making people useful to it. It makes people: it breeds them carefully, it indoctrinates them through schools, it uses drugs and operant conditioning to transform their minds and make them into automata tools. It commits every atrocity that a modern Western reader recognizes as abhorrent. This is a problem. It is a problem because we are asked, as readers, to believe that there are reasons besides blackmail that a person would willingly become an agent of the Masquerade. We are asked to imagine that the Masquerade is a beautiful machine.
for starters. "It commits every atrocity that a modern Western reader recognizes as abhorrent." MODERN WESTERN EMPIRES DID, AND OCCASIONALLY STILL DO, MOST OF THESE THINGS!!! THIS IS US! WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!!! I FEEL INSANE!!!!
I think the book makes it more than explicitly clear why the empire is appealing??? it has all of the capital???? its building schools and sewage systems and importing food and goods and teaching reading and writing??? baru's own internal narrative often shows her own strife at the fact that the empire has made genuinely incredible scientific advancements that offer significant improvements in quality of life to many, many people. martine actually acknowledges this in the next paragraph of her review, and then brushes it away as not being good enough. why? what about that doesn't convince you?
she is seeming to hugely ignore the fact that in the case of aurdwynn specifically, the bureaucracy of the empire is coming in to unseat feudal aristocracy! what the masquerade offers may not be particularly tempting to most of that ruling class, but its economic opportunities are more then believably appealing to the common people. i think this is made pretty clear when baru's ploy to use the fiat bank to make loans to the aurdwynni people and basically lessen the massive tax burdens from the duchies wins her huge favor with the public.
and frankly even for the ruling class the potential economic benefits are massive too if you're willing to participate in the empire properly. yes the empire doesn't have Moral appeal. it doesn't fucking have to. it owns pretty much every economy outside of the oriati mbo. the fact that that's not enough for her is as you've pointed out really really showing her biases and blind spots. 'no reason besides blackmail' MONEY!!!! MONEY! IT'S MONEY! THIS IS A BOOK ABOUT ACCOUNTING! HOW DID YOU MISS THAT!!!
and the invocation of the concept of "civilized" as an objective quality, despite the recognition that the empire constructs what counts as "civilization" is so fucking unserious/simplistic/juvenile! why do you need to imagine yourself a place in the empire? in the imperial core specifically!
And this is really it for me too, yeah. It's gross. It's absolutely gross. "An empire isn't believably appealing unless I, personally, find it appealing" there are people alive who are eugenicists, who love community policing, who believe in race science. the masquerade is an empire for them. the thing about empires is that they are only actually empowering for an incredibly small subset of people, and the fact that You, Specifically, Arkady Martine can't imagine being one of those people in this instance doesn't make it not believable. This is a shatteringly individualist way of engaging with a work.
As for your points about the way she handles empire in her own book obviously i can't have anything to say there because i haven't read it yet, but i do absolutely agree with you on this bit:
and idk this may be reductive of me but i think if you are going to pull features from civilizations that have been colonized and use them to inspire fictional colonizing forces, you ARE saying something there! idk! and like, the ancient Mayan
1000% i don't think this is reductive of you. whether or not you're consciously saying anything is one question but it's a choice that absolutely doesn't exist in a vacuum. out of curiosity i googled her to see if she was of mayan descent or anything and maybe she chose that due to some personal ties to the subject matter but she doesn't seem to be. which of course i don't think means she can't or shouldn't draw any inspiration from there but i do think all of these sorts of choices are meaningful
i don't really have much to say here to round off a conclusion but. wow. deeply deeply telling review that does not particularly make me want to read anything she has written beyond this.
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