#they dont have to force themselves to do things for other people when its going to hurt them!!!

[bonnibellexox]

Writing: Things I Learnt the Hard Way #11

~Character Conflict~

Conflict is one of the biggest pitfalls in character-driven stories like romances. How often have you felt like one character flies off the handle at nothing just so they can argue? Be it jealousy, neglect or cheating, it always seems to happen shortly after the ‘will they/won't they’ has run its course. Every story needs conflict, so I guess John will get mad at Jane for being out late and they’ll almost break up over it... Or something.

Well, maybe don't do that.

Instead, you need to work on your characters themselves. Are they too generic? Are they too similar? What makes real relationships so prone to tension and conflict, even when the couple are perfect for each other? Real people fight because real people are different, no matter how much they have in common.

So here’s the formula:

1) Give your characters more rounded personalities, value and principles. This does not mean you should write polar opposites with nothing in common, it just means that people’s experiences will inevitably make them react to things differently. (This is crucial)

2) Set off a separate conflict- A traumatising event, an argument with a third party, pregnancy, illness, house burning down. Pick something that will poke them in all the right places.

3) Now, let your characters react to this. Conflict will bloom in just the approach they take in this situation. Both can have their reasons to behave the way they do, while still being at odds with the other person.

It's hard to write about two good people who still fight somehow. It feels like there's supposed to be bad guy but you dont want to ruin one of your carefully crafted sweethearts just for the book. Well the reality is that bumping into each other is human nature, especially under stress. With all the good intentions in the world, sometimes you won't see eye to eye.

The empathy you fell in love with might stop your partner from condeming peoples actions even when they hurt you. The adventous spirit that lit up your life might overheat when its forced to stay home with a sick baby for days on end. The trust you earned through months of careful affections might be lost in one moment of anger. The laid-back attitude that freed you from perfectionism might become bloodboiling when you need a situation to be taken seriously. The joy you became accustomed to might be hiding a million tiny cracks.

Use that. Let your characters discover every incompatibility and find a way to work with it. It will write your character arc for you and won’t have your audience wondering why the book is still going.

[justpollux]

socializing is SO GODDAMN FUCKING HARD and I wish I could just give up and stop masking and just do what I want without pissing people off!!!!!!!

[dog-girl-zezora]

My problematic trait is that I will watch chaos unfold around my coworkers and not offer any help unless they look to me for it

[snekdood]

i think theres more kinks id be willing to explore if i could sort what i find online of it between consentual and not

[mgsdelta]

being poor is literally so miserable

[serpentine-illusion]

🔊Yapping about my Cirrus/Copia/Aether delusions and y’all are forced to listen 🔊 [ part 1 ]

At some point i promised thoughts and delusions about whatever I am on atm so here it is. I am so deep in the trenches about this ship, this is like a general train of thought ive had for them and their dynamic, how things worked out, what is going on all that. This is up until Copia becomes Papa, I will make a second post with the rest :)

[Some things in here are definitely not at all supported by the lore, this is mostly me being delusional and straight up making shit up and playing with my barbie dolls so 🙌🏻]’

Also!!! If you are looking for like fluff, healthy headcanons about fictional relationships, this might not be the post for you! They are quite toxic and I think exploring toxic people and toxic relationships is very interesting, so just keep that in mind :)

-Cirrus imprints on him as soon as he summons her, idk why, she just does

-she is totally infatuated with, they are glued together most of the time and she takes a lot of tasks and responsibilities off his shoulders. She worships that man physically and spiritually bro

-they do start out as just friends, they have a lot in common and spend A LOT of time together. They have similar personalities, in group settings they seem more reserved and quiet but when they are amongst themselves they usually get loud and passionate about whatever they are talking about

-Copia is sort of confused by ghoul dynamics and finds them hard to navigate/doesnt know how to properly insert himself into the group/what boundaries he should be aware of etc, while cirrus is nervous about overstepping and scaring him off

-they sort of naturally just…develop into something more. They spend more time together, they have really intimate conversations and share a lot with each other, touches linger longer, physical boundaries are non existent.

-theres no official start to them ‘dating’, their bond is just extremely strong and it develops into that direction and they dont really hesitate when it comes to going further

-ghoul dynamics are sort of poly by default. The ghouls all mingle with each other, some have stronger bonds ( cirrus and cumulus are very very close, later her and aether as well)

-BUT cirrus is very territorial. She is very protective and can get very condescending when it comes to her bond with copia. she gets jealous easily when he spends time with the other ghouls.

-cirrus is still actively involved with the other ghouls, it comes natural, but she gets very bothered when anyone but her is close to copia

-the other ghouls are….irritated with this for sure

-Cirrus is sort of stuck in the middle. She feels like she has little to no control over her jealousy when it comes to copia, but on the other hand she feels very self conscious about how the other ghouls perceive her in that context.

-Copia is super aware that she is totally codependent. He can tell its having an impact on her dynamic with the other ghouls and he knows its a bad look on himself to have a ghoul tend to all of his needs 24/7. But he doesn’t do anything about it because he enjoys being the center of attention.

-Cirrus is assigned other tasks with a handful of other ghouls when the Rat MV incident occurs ( I talked about this on my copia reference sheet).

-the only ghouls shooting the MV with copia are dewdrop, mountain and swiss (idc if this isnt accurate my house my rules) and cirrus has a normal reaction and doesnt overreact at all ( she completely crashes out. )

-Copia is send to the infirmary for treatment and cirrus is not allowed to see him ( higher clergy administration generally doesnt care about ghouls beyond their use and purpose. Cirrus doesnt work in the infirmary, so she has no business being there. Copia is not Papa at this point, so he does not really have a say in the matter either. )

-The only way Cirrus can get an update on Copias condition is through Aether ( Aether works in the hospital wing because he has very strong quintessence magic and is overall responsible and reliable )

-Aether and Cirrus have been close before, but they grow super close here

-they genuinely really like each other, they are similar in character, they have the same humor and they enjoy the same things

-Aether loves Cirrus, he thinks shes pretty (🥴🥴😳😳) and responsible. He admires how strong minded and passionate she is. He can also see that Cirrus bottles up a lot, she takes up a lot of responsibilities and doesn’t share when something is too much for her. Because she seems like a reliable person, the other ghouls rarely ask how shes actually doing.

-Aether comforts her a lot and they spend a lot of time together

-when Copia gets out, Cirrus is devastated by his injury. He uses crutches and is in a lot of pain and she totally blames herself for not being there when it happened and for not taking care of him right after the accident.

-Cirrus totally takes over, she makes sure Copia doesnt have to lift a finger, shes mad with worry and shes scared hes gonna break if she doesnt do literally everything for him

-Copia thinks its endearing, but at the same time he is frustrated. He definitely gets a little stir crazy and irritated that she doesnt allow him to do his usual work.

-They definitely get into it a little bit, Copia is trying to make her understand that shes smothering him, hes not as fragile as she makes him feel

-Cirrus like, gets it and she feels bad but at the same time she totally feels like shes losing control and losing him when shes not up in his business 24/7

-Aether spends a lot of time with both of them, he does physical therapy with Copia, infuses his joints with quintessence and in general is there to help him get back on his feet

-Cirrus and Aeth have gotten super super close and Copia expresses he would be happy to welcome Aether into whatever they have

-Cirrus is like. Shes ok with it. She likes Aether so much and she knows realistically this is a great dynamic. They would work well as a trio. Copia gets along with both of them.

-BUT she is so so jealous already, shes fuming inside, her guts hurt thinking about sharing him but she still agrees because she wants Aether to be with the both of them. She is so torn between her rational love for Aether, and being completely devoted to Copia at the same time. It shouldnt be hard to let him in but she is just never able to find any balance.

-So they let Aether into their situationship and it works well. He balances out the dynamic Cirrus and Copia have. Aether is a little more casual than Cirrus for sure, he doesnt obsess as much.

-Cirrus has like. Rules. She has rules in place for boundaries and rules Aether has to respect in the relationship. They only apply to his dynamic with Copia though and Aether is obviously frustrated with her. Cirrus and Aether usually communicate well, they communicate like 2 sane adults, but when it comes to Copia, Cirrus needs to be in control, she needs to oversee everything and it drives Aether nuts.

-Copia does admit to Aether that those rules didnt exactly come from him, but he also never stops Cirrus from making them, because he likes being treated like her little trophy that she doesnt want to share and he also loves her too much to make her upset by denying her the control she needs

-its obviously very inconsiderate and makes Aether feel like hes third wheeling a little bit, but Aether is a people pleaser, he does what hes told to make the people around him happy, so he goes along with it.

-once copia recovers they sort of all go back to relative normalcy. He uses a cane permanently now, definitely lost some mobility and is forced to be way more sedentary.

-He really doesnt mind it. He has been under a lot of pressure from everyone, about everything. How much he works, how he looks, what he does and now everyone is finally giving him more grace.

-he tries to give himself more grace too, he tries to be nicer to himself, he's still pretty bothered about how much or little he works, what he accomplishes etc but he's less bothered by...like himself

-he's always worried and anxious but Aether and Cirrus make him feel good about the way he looks and thinks. He gains some weight and its healthy relationship and recovery weight.

-Cirrus is like, in pain with him, she knows its a change for him that is hard on him and she does everything she can to make him feel better and take care of him

-BUT (and she feels horrible about this) its easier to keep him close to her this way. He relies on her way more now and she enjoys it. And she knows she shouldnt.

-Her and Aether rarely get into fights. They both always tough it out when they have a problem and then find softness and comfort in each other again.

I think this is all for now, at some point I will make a part 2.

[agirlwithglam]

becoming selfish is the best thing i ever did.

✧*. * · ~ thewizardliz 💖🕯

💖 stop going into arguments with people who are not willing to listen. it is completely useless. if your boundaries were crossed, and the other person is not willing to say "im sorry for doing that, i won't do it again", then conversation over. its done. its not worth your time or energy.

🕯prioritise your own needs and wants. fill your own cup! are you okay? are you whole? if you don't want to do something, dont do it. whatever you want, comes first.

💖 stop being always available and trying to save everyone. if you keep on being there for people- again and again and again, you are letting people use you. people will only reach out to you if they have problems or they need help. but what about when everything is going good? then what? do they come to you? you are showing them that they can always come to you and you will always be there but that shouldn't be the case. be able to say "i dont want to listen to your problems today. i have enough of my own problems and goals to worry about." the only reason they come is because YOU allow them to come.

you ask yourself why does anyone not make sure i am ok? thats because YOU do not make sure you're okay. remember that you cannot save everyone. IT IS NOT YOUR JOB TO SAVE EVERYONE.

🕯sometimes god gives you situations so you can grow. also if you are constantly trying to step in for God to help and save everyone, you may also be sabotaging God's plan. people give certain problems/ situations in their life because God gives it to them so they can grow wiser and better! why are you trying to save them? its not your responsibility.

💖 be okay with people misunderstanding you. if you have a goal or a dream in your life, NOT EVERYONE IS GOING TO UNDERSTAND YOU. people come from different households, religions, schools, etc. they will not understand you or have the same mindset/ heart as you. be OKAY with people not understanding you. they are not you.

"oh why did they hurt me/ treat me like that, i would never do that to them" honey, they're not you. they don't have the same personality or heart as you. if you're constantly gonna go through life thinking that everyone has the same heart as you, you will be hurt. i have done that so often thinking that i'm a good friend to them so they will do the same back, its not always true. you will be hurt. people are just different. and thats okay! let them be.

🕯realise that you can only change yourself. stop trying to change people. they will not change unless they are willing to. our human nature is comfort- humans love comfort. in order to change, it takes going through discomfort. it takes strength. some people are completely oblivious to themselves- they think that everything is perfect and nothing is wrong with them, etc. and yk what? let them be. you cannot change them. but you can change yourself. and if you do not want to change, you're not going to change. no one can force you to change unless you want to. by trying to change others and help them become their best version, you're wasting your energy to become YOUR best version and to create your dream life!

💖 stop needing people to validate your self worth. "i dont need anyone to tell me how good i am. i dont need anyone to tell me how beautiful i am or smart i am. because i see those qualities in myself already." KNOW who you are. if you get a compliment, say thankyou, be grateful. but don't crave it. be okay with not receiving it and not needing it because you already know that you're all that. if you need that compliment or words from other people, then they are basically in charge of you because their opinion can change your reality entirely and shake you. when YOU are the one that always creates your own reality! be strong in your ownself otherwise you'll be like their little puppet. know that you know what? im amazing. i've been through so much stuff in life but i'm still coming out strong and i'm still standing.

🕯treat yourself as your own best friend. talk to yourself! in her video, liz said that she talks to herself before bed and tells herself about her day. (for that i recommend videoing yourself! its so much fun) or when she's stressed she says to herself why are you feeling stressed? what exactly are you feeling? and then she tells herself and talks to herself. BE YOUR OWN BEST FRIEND. hype yourself up in your mind! comfort yourself, have a conversation, etc. give the advice to yourself. go on dates with yourself, hug yourself, love yourself.

💖 less chasing, more attracting. being feminine basically means letting it flow and go. being calm and at peace. being relaxed because you know that you attract all your blessings. when you're not desperately looking for things, or chasing after things, then your whole. your energy is whole. when the energy of desperation is gone, then you can attract everything you want into your life.

🕯only add great people to your life. make sure that whoever you date, are friends with, hang around- they need to add value to your life. its not only in terms of money, its also in terms of are you making me happy? are you reciprocating my energy? people that are always negative or always complaining, do not allow them into your life. do not be friends with people who are being miserable then complain about being miserable but don't do anything about it.

💖 stop seeking other people's permission to do whats best for you. you don't need someone to say "you can do it!" because you know you can. be independent- liz doesn't need to ask anyone for money because she is already making her own money. she is doing everything for herself. she has everything she need to support herself and people she loves.

like how cocky are you to think that you know be better than i know myself? lol. you have not been through what i have been through. you have not lived my life and yet you're here deciding whats good for me and what i should be doing? um, no thanks! xoxo.

[yuri-for-businesswomen]

i have left

hey everyone this will probably be the last thing i post on this blog albeit im keeping it up for resources.

im eternally grateful for how this community has helped me through prostitution and everything, i have amazing mutuals and i have learned so much 💜

but it has become toxic. many of yall cant handle disagreement and default to being as condescending and obnoxious as possible. one of us calling out a post is not enough, we have to dog pile everyone with a slightly shitty opinion. some of yall have severely lost the plot if you ever had it in the first place. not everything is that serious, especially when it comes to online drama.

im sick of it. so many engage in the same bullshit we accuse online trans activists of. this is an echo chamber. so many just mindlessly parrot slogans and arguments. what im very sick of is seeing single tweets or posts by a nobody, usually anonymous, being spread as receipts and shit. you know how annoying it is when everything a self proclaimed terf somewhere on social media says is taken by trans activists at face value and representative of the community when theyre not even radical feminist, just transphobic? yeah. yet a lot of yall do the same by saving and sharing „receipts“ where some random person who claims theyre trans (or not even) says some fucked up or out of pocket shit. you will always find people like that online, from any politicial „camp“ or ideological alignment!

a lot of yall seem to think that debate is about winning and not like, having an exchange of arguments and let the audience come to their own conclusion

and i just dont hate trans people. in fact i feel kinship to any female or homosexual trans person, anyone except heterosexual males. many of yall dont even realise how male centered you are when you more or less equal the trans community to heterosexual men who have a fetish for humiliation and forced feminisation or whatever. who exist and are an issue and i do wish the trans community at large would distance themselves from those men, but its not all there is to it. yes i agree that we need to protect vulnerable young people, girls and especially lesbians and gay boys, from being pushed into transitioning, i think the age of consent should be put at 21 or something, but we have to acknowledge and consider that there are people who have already transitioned and will transition in the future and i just dont understand how you cant have any empathy for them. no matter what you think about transition, many trans people ARE vulnerable and marginalised. plus consider how many detransitioned women are in this community yet yall talk about trans people as mutilated and shit its gross. in the end we can only try to establish structures that keep people from self harming, but an adult of sound mind has the right to do so anyways, including plastic surgery and trans surgeries. and i want to keep my arms open to them; but a lot of rhetoric around it spread on here will only alienate them further.

right now im saving all my essays in notes so its out of my mind. i have missed the community a lot so maybe i will return at some point but i have also been feeling better since i stopped being on radblr. i miss the rare valuable input and thoughts by other women but overall i have felt unaligned with how things have been handled on here. it has been mostly negative instead of constructive and pragmatic. ive had the impression some of yall enjoy the „being in the in-group“ community aspect more than actually being here for feminist exchange. lack of nuance, lack of empathy, lack of reason. it pains me but i have more and more come to understand why people just block us without engaging on general suspicion because ive also come to be annoyed with some of yall engaging with posts - and im on „your side“.

anyways im doing okay, im going to drug counselling regularly now and am trying to establish a stable life for those of you who inquired, and i hope anyone reading this is self reflected enough to know whether this applies to her or not. bye

[fairuzfan]

As an american myself I can understand why people are so scared that arab-americans are refusing to vote for biden since im terrified of what trump will do to our country. I very much feel forced to choose between two very evil people where i have to choose who will probably do less overall damage. But yelling at arab-americans isnt the right move. Im terrified at what decisions ill have to make with voting, but its not like all arab-americans who refuse to vote for biden are trump supporters and in fact many of them were going to vote for biden before october 7. I dont know what we should do about voting, but yelling at grieving arab-americans who cant bring themselves to vote for biden when biden helped kill their family is just wrong. I get the fear, i really do because i feel it too, but that doesnt make it right.

Like as a disabled person I'm pretty nervous about trump presidency ngl. I need meds that allow me to function on a day to day basis. But I cannot in good conscious vote for the man that killed my family's loved ones. Not to give too much info but a family member's best friend was Heba Abu Nada... when they learned of her death they cried for three days straight and asked me not to say any news about Palestine for a week back in October. Even when I told them that Heba's poem became viral, they just nodded at me and said "a lot of talented people in Gaza died" before going quiet, staring out in the distance. That's something that will stay with me for the rest of my life and I can't bare to think of voting for the man that caused that amount of sorrow to anyone. So imagine every single Palestinian family — they all have their own stories and their own grief. So telling them "that means absolutely nothing" and being told to suck it up isn't going to make anyone want to trust you that you have people's best interests in heart. I don't know. It just is so so obvious how little people care about other people and to me that's the most.... shocking thing.

[transmutationisms]

Why do u think so many people in like 'neurodivergent' spaces seem to simultaneously hold the belief that certain developmental disabilities or 'mental illnesses' arent 'an excuse' to be unable to do certain tasks, act certain ways, or to 'work on urself' or 'be better', in a way that completely ignores people with higher support needs that genuinely cannot do these things,just a complete lack of understanding that some people are not ever going to be able to 'mask' and that no, its not a 'privilege' to be very visibly, obviously considered developmentally defective from a young age..........but also practically worship psychiatry and pathologize every single iota of their behavior, labelling themselves with things like 'demand avoidance' without understanding the context behind these words or who gets nonconsensually labelled with these things, and what it is used to justify doing. I dont know how some people can be so ignorant of the material reality faced by people who get shoved into the 'low functioning' or 'severely mentally ill' boxes (how many autism influencer types have u ever seen bring up sheltered workshops?), but its a massive barrier to interacting in ND spaces for me and a lot of people i know. i dont understand how people who talk about how ADHD brains react differently to meds than 'neurotypical brains' can not understand that like, for example, i cant eat a certain food, i can eat rotten food and food i dislike but not that food, no matter if im starving, I was restrained and force fed that food in special ed and then force fed my own vomit when i inevitably threw up, I would have eaten the food if i could to make that stop! Why is this contradiction so prevalent!!! Anyway love the blog im also having an #ediblenight

well a few things. one is simple moral hypocrisy (accommodations for me, not for thee)

another is that i think many people actually do perceive the philosophical nonsensicality of psychiatric diagnosis (the recursive circle whereby you are dx'd with x because you do y, which is caused by x, which you know because the definition of x is that someone does y, which was based on clinical observation of people doing y and doctors determining that was harmful and therefore indicative of a medical problem, in other words the entire thing's observational but interpreted as providing a causal explanation)--

--they do perceive this as basically nonsense, hence "having x doesn't excuse [behaviour]" but then simultaneously, they have a prima facie credulous attitude toward Science, and toward the claim that psychiatry is Science, and so you get these like nonsense statements out both sides of their mouths where a diagnosis doesn't excuse anything they find morally reprehensible or personally annoying but it does also provide biologically irrefutable explanations for other things WHEN that's convenient for them.

another thing is just that experientially, lots of our actions feel out of our control for like numerous reasons having to do with alienation largely, and when those actions are also stigmatised it pushes people toward the promise of moral exculpation that psychiatry markets itself with, which is a kind of determinism in its strong forms and isn't really compatible with interpreting other people's actions as being intentional or willed or whatever. so again you just end up with these double statements lol , like, a problem with psychiatry trying to claim legitimacy as a 'brain science' is it does kind of counterpose itself to most interpretations of free will. any time you are stuck choosing between moral culpability and biological determinism you kinda already lost the plot & this is something that antipsych people get maddeningly accused of all the time when what we're actually saying is it's possible to be neither biologically diseased nor broken nor immoral for doing the Behaviours lol

[knyontop]

I already requested something similar to somebody else but whatever- Could i have some creeps (maybe include Ben, Sally, Toby and Ej) with a new preteen proxy?? And the kid is obviously always tired/sleepy and somewhat depressed. Reader is also just really shy and nervous around people (ESPECIALLY PEOPLE OLDER THAN HER BECAUSE SHE OVERTHINKS AND DOESNT WANT TO MAKE A BAD IMPRESSION). And because of all this theyre really timid dont have any friends and just observes instead? (Whenever theyre alone they talk to themselves but nobody hopefully knows that <3) Theyre really intrested in others but theyre just scared and a loser. (also likes to keep things to themselves so hardly ever opens up) They only talk when being asked a question but when reader didnt understand them clearly they dont ask the other to repeat themselves but just stand like stupid literally the definition of awkward. Very isolant, overfriendly, nervous, silent and obedient. Will listen to you because they want to do a good impression. Oh youre hungry and want food? The kid will bring some snacks if you ask. (Theyre just a lonely scared kid who is trying to do their job correctly and fit in) sorry for yapping :c

₊˚ ‿︵‿୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿ ˚₊

AWH DW ITS OKAY YOU CAN SAY WHATEVER YOU WANT AND MAKE IT PARAGRAPHS!!

Creepypasta x Child!reader

Ft: Ben drowned, Jeff the killer, sally willaims, eyeless jack, ticci toby, and our amazing, beautiful, handsome, reader.

Ben:

・as soon as he meets you he knows your an easy target for shit.

・he likes to fuck with your mind a lot.

・he sometimes feels bad about it because of how vulnerable you are, he has sadistic instincts and protective instincts about you.

・The more Ben hangs around you he starts to town down his mind games.

・he is practically your shadow.

・Ben also likes to teach you how to play games!

・Hes also starting to feel bad when he says thing like “What makes you think I care about you? Your so silly.” Because he sees how upset you get he then apologizes with a “Kid I didn’t mean it you dummy.” (Dw he means dummmy lovingly)

・he likes to think of you as his side kick.

・”Y/N, dont worry ‘bout jeff he dont mean it.”

EJ:

・when he first saw you, he knew you would be a tough case.

・sometimes he likes to spook you just a little bit.

・hes very curious about you even though your like an open book, he wants to know more about you.

・he feels bad for you because your a child, but he wont ever admit it.

・Jack sometimes lets you help him with small tasks.

・he has fatherly instincts towards you.. but also has thoughts about eating you because your like a helpless little lamb and hes the wolf. He likes his victims vulnerable.

・He does not understand his feelings about you see he pushes them to the back of his mind.

・”You want to help me? But your a child..”

・he looks down of you because hes older then you. It’s immature but he can’t control it.

toby:

・he sees himself in you and he doesn’t like thinking about the past so he tries to stay away from you.

・but it also makes him protective over you like everyone else.

・so he doesn’t hang around you, but, he protects you like his life.

・when he actually has moments where he hangs around you he starts to like you.

・like your the only person besides sally who treats him like a human.

・but that doesn’t mean he wont bully you a bit!

・Its more like teasing but like sometimes he takes it to far sometimes.

・his dark humor scares you.

・very clingy when he gets to know you.

・he asks to have sleepovers with you! (He watches you sleep)

・he takes up every opportunity to go on a mission with you.

・hes like obsessed with you at this point. (Platonically)

・he sees you as “his” Defenseless little sibling!

・”H-Hey there Y-Y-Y/N! Want to- to- go on a mission with m-me?” (He will force you if you say no)

Sally:

・Sally loves you so much!

・theres someone here age, and another girl!

・theres barely any girls!! ☹️

・loves hanging out with you and having tea partys and just everything!

・shes a sweetie<33

・she understands your anxiety around people who are older.

・she has that to.

・Sally even lets you babysit Mr. Charlie! (She will be mad at you for a bit if you hurt/lose him)

・just call her and shes there!!

・”Hey N/N!! Want to babysit Mr. Charlie?”

₊˚ ‿︵‿୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿ ˚₊

NERVOUS ABOUT THIS AT FIRST BUT I LOVE IT!!

[mueritos]

trying to be more accepting of the likelihood I am autistic, I feel ive been having this constant back and forth conversation with myself for the past 2 years about it. "you can go to school, be a therapist for people, run errands, win awards, and somehow fit 2 jobs into all of that" and I use that as proof that I am NOT autistic...however, realizing i lose an entire weekend for a trip? distress. fire alarm goes off in the middle of the night and leaves me trembling, crying, and forced to recover? oh boy i wonder why that happened. feeling confused and like i'm constantly missing something when people express themselves in class or in the workplace? hm, it's almost as if I struggle to not take their language literally.

i don't think i've ever been allowed to be "disabled" by whatever neurodivergency and its symptomology, like, ever. god speed any other neurodivergent children of immigrants, but i don't feel allowed to let any cluster of disturbances or schedule changes or social conundrums disable me. I mean, they can affect me privately, where I am forced to stim and cry and process all on my own. But unfortunately i cannot look like the misshapen freak I feel I am, or well, as least not appear so in a socially unacceptable way.

it's funny i carry so much shame. i am unmasking in ways i never thought i could. i am allowing myself to take things literally with people, and I am allowing myself to ask more questions. "what did you mean by that?" "why did you use that word to describe that?" "can you rephrase that?" it's funnier that I am at such a queer and neurodiverse internship; nearly all of the other clinical staff have some sort of diagnosis (usually adhd/ocd/with flavors of trauma), and we all serve a population of the queerest and most neurodiverse students. i feel SO happy when I see a student and they refuse to make eye contact with me, because I take it as an invitation to NOT look them in the eye too! i tell students during our sessions feel free to stim, here's a weighted plushie you can hold, sit where you like, would you like to pace, should I dim the lights? it is even funnier that i am a neurodivergent clinician working with neurodivergent people, and half the time I dont even follow the same advice I give my clients!

i worry about what my life will look like when i've graduated. my master's will say, "hey, this guy is a clinical social worker and is now ready to be your therapist! or caseworker! whatever they have you people do nowadays!" and I don't think i feel ready to enter any workforce. how on earth will i manage my life and wellbeing doing this 40 hours a week? like wtf? ugh.

i dunno. these r just rambles and perhaps im just seeking some sort of comfort from other autistic people, especially because it feels like i have very few autistic people in my life. i know a lot of the validation i seek will be "resolved" if i seek out an official diagnosis, but I don't have time or $ for that. nor do I think I want one for a number of reasons. I should just continue working on my own self-esteem when it comes to most likely being autistic.

oh well

[dunmeshi-darlings]

this might be a really like niche thing if you are doing requests of course but what about a tiger beastman reader with marcille it can be sfw or nsfw either or its all good!

Nobody knew you were a beastkin at first, it was something you held in secret. After all, Beastmen are viewed in not the most pleasant of lights. When the party had seen your tiger tail they had assumed you were a beastkin like izutsumi, which you quickly said was the case. You weren't ready to tell them the truth yet, yes they treated izutsumi perfectly fine it was just...you were scared, beast man are viewed as either criminals that were punished or dangerous people that did this to themselves. you were planning on telling them just...just when you thought the time was right.

However that decision was made for you one day, The group had been travelling and had been ambushed by a particularly fierce monster. You all were fighting it as best you could but you watched it knock laios aside and charge Marcille. You knew you had to do something, you couldnt let her die...you couldnt let her get hurt. she had been so kind to you since you joined, always willing to help when you needed it. Talking to you about magic and how she could tell you had potential with magic she could feel it (she could sense the beastman magic but didnt realize it). You couldnt let anything happen to her.

You sprinted at the charging monster as you began to take your form, Bones shifting and popping into place, skin stretching and pulsing as it shifted, Your jaw extending as your teeth grew and pushed forward into fangs, nails extending into long sharp claws. Everyone's eyes were on the monster so nobody saw you at first, too focused on the monster that was about to attack marcille. However their attention was immediately drawn when a deep guttural roar rang out through the dungeon as a large figure slammed into the side of the monster which was only a mere few feet from marcille. The monster and this new being thrown to the other side of the dungeons room from the sheer force of this mystery attackers launch.

The fight may have only lasted a short moment, but that moment was a bloody and visceral one. Swinging claws and gnashing teeth, Blood, fur, scales, and viscera splattered in every direction around this violent brawl. Eventually the mysterious figure flipped the monster onto its back and sank its massive fangs into the monsters throat, it let out gurgling hisses as it tried to fight back, but the figure bit down harder and a muffled cracking was heard. The monster continued to fight even though the party could see it was slowing down its movements, however the figure gave on hard yank of its head and a loud snapping was heard and the monster fell limp in this beings jaws. It shook its head a few more times, smaller cracking noises resounded as it made sure its target was killed before it slowly let go of its throat and stood up, staring at the party who looked on in shock.

Standing before the rest of Laios party, Its muzzle dripping blood and scraps of flesh stood a massive humanoid tiger. Its Muscles rippling under its dense orange fur, twitching every few seconds, Like springs ready to launch this behemoth of claws and fur at its next target. But the being simply wiped the blood off its mouth as it began to speak. "i....im sorry...i wanted to tell you all...i promise i did..i just...i didnt know when it would be right." You spoke, slowly shifting back into your normal form as you prepared yourself for the worst. you expected them to berate you and be upset that you hid this from them and say they dont want you around. But it was izutsumi who spoke up first. "i knew you smelled like a cat." Catching you and everyone off guard as they couldnt help but chuckled.

Laios was perhaps the most excited of them all, He had stars in his eyes as he asked you question after question about your tiger form, asking how you got it and what its like. Chilchuck simply shrugged and said he didnt blame you for not talking about it, that it was a private matter and how he isnt the most forthcoming person either. Senshi scratched his chin, making comments about needing to adjust your portions of food since you have a much bulkier frame you need to keep fed hidden away. However it was marcilles reaction that had you the most curious, she had a blush on her face as she thanked you for saving her and she looked almost...nervous?

You tell her that its ok, that you couldnt just sit by and let her get hurt or worse. And that even if you got kicked out of the party, you had to make sure she was ok. This caused the elf to blush more, the tips of her pointy ears a crimson hue as they wiggled, her awkwardly giggling and saying thanks again. Of course she quickly shouted about your injuries, Sure your thick fur protected from alot of the attacks but some of them definitely got through and it was only now you were starting to feel the stings of various gouges and bite marks.

Marcille began tending to your wounds, using her magic to heal your wounds and make sure you were ok. Normally her healing magic, while fast, hurts almost as much as the wounds. But she was being particularly gentle this time, using the magic slowly and it felt almost like healing magic from the gnome school of magic. You asked her why she was doing it this way and another blush crossed her face, she smiled softly "well...i dont want to see you hurt either..so im taking my time with this and making sure it doesnt hurt to much...i just....ive been thinking about you lately, and especially after what you did earlier...risking yourself and exposing your identity like that to protect me...you mean alot to me." She says taking one of her hands and placing it softly onto your cheek, using her magic to heal a cut that had crossed your cheek all the way back to your ear. You felt the wound heal quickly as it was a shallow cut...but she didnt move her hand, it sat there for awhile. It felt like she didnt want to move her hand away, like she was treasuring this moment. And so you took a breath and put your hand over hers, tilting your head into her hand. Commenting how she means alot to you as well. The two of you staring lovingly into each others eyes for a moment before chilchucks voice quickly makes you two separate.

As night fell you began to settle in, making your cot as you got ready for sleep. However you stopped when marcille walked up with her pillow. "hey, do you mind if i sleep with you tonight?" she asked softly, a grin across her face as you grinned back and motioned for her to nestle in as she did so. You wrapped your arms around the elf woman and pulled her into a soft hug, she hummed softly and happily in your arms as you two lay together. "you know how chilchuck feels about in party relationships." you say jokingly causing the elf woman to roll her eyes. "oh that grump can deal with it, besides. Ill just say im sleeping here to make sure your wounds have healed properly thats all." She says with a wink, the two of you smiling as you nestled in for the night. Perhaps you could get used to this whole, being open and honest thing.

[poopingonthefloor]

Davesport is Toxic NOT abusive

(((WARNING: PRETTY LONG POST UNDER THE CUT.))) I've seen some people making the claims that Davesport is comship/proship (ok well i've more seen people bitching about it) and im tired of the Davesport slander so this will be an analysis of their relationship. My motive isn't to force anyone to ship it or anything- i really dont care what you do with your life, my frustration is just when people try to make up REASONS why they don't like the ship, even though its literally canon (and not badly written). My main point is -- You can hate what you want. You don't need a reason, and it doesn't need to be bad just because you don't like it. But I will not take any slander on their ship nor any slander of people who like davesport. Davesport is absolutely toxic-- No DSAF fan would disagree. They are literally child murderers with little to no souls and literally are physically disfigured to the point they don't have the capacity to feel proper humanity anymore. You cant expect 2 men who live their lives willingly murdering and then partying in vegas to celebrate on repeat to be gentle and kind to themselves or anyone else.

However, its NOT abusive. I've seen multiple people (mostly from twitter screenshots) claim that Davesport is abusive or the way people portray it is in a fetishy or romanticizing way of abuse, when that's just not the case. I don't blame a lot of people, since a lot of it comes from reading context and intent of the artist, which not everyone is good at-- BUT I'm here to assure you that MOST people don't intend to do that much and just like to portray how their dynamic is canonically like or portray Daves obsession with Jack. Another argument I've seen (by a twitter screenshot...) is that people are comshipping Davesport because people draw Jack annoyed a lot at Dave when...thats not true? That's just Jack's personality, first off:

(From the Dave x Reader fanfic by Directdoggo)

"Jack is a bastardman not very touchy-feely. We can see this in many scenes, where Dave more or less says “I love you” and Jack responds with deflecting humour, or outright scorn. When Dave says it for the final time, this time, Jack tries to say it back, but can’t outright, only getting out: “Why is this so hard?” and “I hope you can find peace with what you’ve done.” Which Dave understood the meaning of. (Hey, better than Henry (LEGACY Jack) hearing “I love you” and proceeding to tear Dave limb from limb, huh?"

(Directdoggo describing Jack's personality)

I know it can be a little confusing to some people, but as someone who struggles with similar issues, just because he struggles to express intimately doesn't mean he can't love anything. Sometimes people are just different and communicating like that doesn't come as easily, even to the people you're closest to. To make it as easy as possible to comprehend-- He's quite literally a tsundere. (Minus the exaggerated ridiculousness in anime) He loves Dave, he just cant bring himself to say or act like it. The dismissiveness or rudeness in response to Dave's affection is not abuse, it's just a defensive response since he doesn't know how to say it back. (His way of being "shy") -- Also note its important that Dave UNDERSTANDS this about him by that point.

However Jack isn't the only thing I've seen regarding the claims that their ship is abusive-- and to debunk all of those I'm going to explain the three points that keep Davesport from being abusive, and I'll use Henry x Dave (which is what I'll call it to prevent it getting confused for FNAF willry) as an example alongside it since its super obvious why that one is messed up. Firstly, They are both bad people. By this point, Dave and Jack are murderers. It's just not surprising that they will be willing to kill each other at at least some point, considering they are willing to kill 5 year olds without remorse- and they'll both deserve it. It's only their own faults that they teamed up with the other, and it's meant to be the ultimate irony when Jack becomes even worse than Dave by "An ending". My point is- they're bad people. It's not like they're owed perfect company or would choose wholesome people to hang out with when they're literally both child murderers. Dave wasn't evil and didn't want to kill by the time he teamed up with Henry (and even after it was Henry's fault), so by that point his suffering was absolutely undeserved.

Secondly, They're lacking any specific power dynamic. Unlike Henry and Dave- whom have several levels of "Age, Father figure, and Employer", the most important one is that Henry is Dave's abuser. He manipulated him and purposefully harmed him both mentally and physically, whereas Dave never had any intention of doing either because Dave loved him and didn't want to lose him (because he had nobody else) This obviously much different with Dave and Jack, whom other than being taller and several years older than (which you can argue their 6 year age gap is weird but they didnt get to know each other till they were both older than 30 so by that point age difference doesnt rlly matter and (also theyre "mentally" like 24 and 22 canonically anyways (as much as I usually hate that argument)) Other then that they are only co-workers. This is a bit more arguable during DSAF 1, where Dave comes across more threatening and comes across like he's manipulating Jack, but I don't exactly count that because I wouldn't say theyre "shippable" or in their "situationship*" by that point (but also because them even being a ship was barely considered by the creator at that point obviously)-- whereas Dave is certainly more easily recognized as sincere to Jack in DSAF 2. Jack also is not someone who is afraid to defend himself against Dave, as shown by the fact he's willing to call out Dave's ridiculous behaviors (which is reasonable of him to do).

(Also from the Dave x reader fanfic) (I just think this specific screenshot debunks any sort of "power dynamic" claim)

My Third and Final point: There is a CHOICE involved I haven't really done much Dave defense in this post, but his defense is very simple: He is literally physically unable to comprehend guilt or conscience. Dave didn't want to murder anyone in the first place, but it was Henry who fucked with his (literal) head so much to the point he stopped being able to feel guilt. He doesn't care about murder and doing wrong because he CAN'T care. You can't really let that reflect Dave as a character when he's really not in control of himself in the first place. Now with that, that doesn't change the fact he could certainly affect and hurt people, and it's fully up to Jack as to whether or not he wants to deal with this purple man's freakish life choices and hobbies or not. And that's honestly super dependent on the ending you decide to base Jack on. Most people see the 'canon' endings to be: Gnarly ending (DSAF 1) -> An ending (DSAF 2) -> Good ending (DSAF 3) Where in all of these, Jack DOES choose to deal with Dave and basically is completely cool with murder. You don't have to follow those endings if you don't want to, but that's just typically what the modern "Davesport" is known for, but its what I'm using for my defense (considering this is a defense of both fandom and canon Davesport.) Though as opposed with Henry and Dave- Dave had no choice. Henry only ever manipulated him into thinking he did, and Henry made sure to feed this whole 'we will be a family' ideal into Dave (who never had one) so that Dave would be terrified to lose him. Jack never manipulates Dave (when teamed up with him), and Dave never manipulates Jack (tho arguable in DSAF 1 as well). They stay with each other despite all of their issues, and I believe its due to some co-dependency (imo I think Jack is also obsessed with Dave just in a different way before DSAF 3) Which isn't healthy, but not...inherently abusive.

I believe my main three points kind of cover the most of why I dont consider Davesport to be inherently a bad ship, but like I said- if you don't like it, none of that matters anyways. You dont NEED a reason to like something, and I wont try to convince you why you should ship something because I like it. Just don't hate it just because of what someone else says-- 90% of the dsaf fandom aren't comshippers, and Davesport isn't gross or "toxic /neg" just because it's not healthy. I think "Don't fetishize/romanticize literal abuse like its normal or sexy" and "We should explore more complicated and unhealthy dynamics" can and SHOULD coincide with each other!!!! I think Davesport is great because of how bittersweet it is that these two people finally found solace and acceptance in each other but couldn't get past the self-sabotaging nature of what Henry turned them both into, ultimately making it impossible to work out forever. I think embracing the Davesport makes the (kind of aged) trilogy a lot more enjoyable of an experience and I DO encourage any davesport skeptics to keep an open mind. [Pretend I wrapped this up super nicely I can never do that--- Also this is open for conversation and/or debate, and also yada yada my bad if i said something randomly terrible I have extremely poor social skills lol let me know so I dont do it again yada yada] *Also if anyone doesnt know a situationship is (at least in the context im using it in ive heard other definitions for it but its not a real word so i actually dont care) when 2(or more) people basically treat eachother like lovers but they never communicate this outright and dont technically officially date but like they treat and commit to eachother like a partner would) (So its kind of what all those people who playfully flirt and call each other their spouses as a commited running joke are in)

[thunder-opossum]

Ugh okay I'm about to get very not silly.

Content warning for: Sexual Assult, Body image issues, self harm, probably some depression.

Hmm. I want to talk about this incase I can give strength to anyone else. I know my problems are not as bad as others, but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt and it's not valid.

Ive mentioned my fear of small children, I've mentioned really not liking a family friend (to a point that being forced to stay in a cabin with them made me feel so bad I dug my nails into my skin and scarred my arm and hand)

This all partly relates to one incident many years ago. I dont remember how old I was? Must have been earlier middle school?

The family friends I'm referring to have a son. He's a lot younger than me. He's neurodivergent in some way, he doesn't have the best idea of social anything.

I was staying at the family friends' cabin, my family and theirs. There was a guest cabin. I had just taken a shower to clean off the lake water. I was standing in the guest cabin looking at myself in the mirror by the beds, brushing my hair. I had major body image issues with good ol' puberty. I hated how I looked and i felt shameful when my shirt clung to my chest extra tight. I knew I would dry off more, and it would be less form fitting. I thought i could just stay in the guest cabin until then.

Then all the little kids, the boy and my two sisters, burst in, chasing each other around as kids do. I was still brushing my hair.

Something immature boys find funny is the word "boobs" he laughed at me and kept repeating the word. I adjusted my shirt as best I could I wanted to tell him off, but I was scared I would get in trouble if I made him upset.

I went back to looking in the mirror and brushing my hair. He ran past, giving my boob a poke as he sprinted out the door, my sisters in tow. That was it. That is what the warning was for. A touch. Over in a second.

I was panicked, I didn't know what to do. I sat on the bed for awhile, crying and thinking of what to do. It felt like forever. And as embarrassing as it is to say... at that time in my mind I felt as if it was my fault, as if I had a sign pointing to me saying "touch me". And with that in mind, I calmed myself down, told myself i wouldn't say anything, and walked back to the main cabin.

And when I walked in, it was tense. The boy was getting a talking to from his mother, and mine walked over to me.

She asked me if i was okay.

I said I was fine, confused. Thinking its not like he shoved me, punched me, hurt my physically. My mind did not corelate the emotional anguish rushing though my head as I felt even more shame that people knew. that they had told on themselves somehow.

I was not okay, i am still not okay. And it really sucks. I can't blame everything on one incident. But oh man can I corelate a lot of my problems with that incident.

Tight clothes made me feel like scum. Ive only ever worn sports bras that leave me with terrible chest pain. I still cant stand a tight fitting shirt, a v-neck. I can't stand my feminine traits. Because that's what got me into the mess in the first place.

Something so small can mess you up so much. And I'm sick of not acknowledging it. Everyone has forgotten or said nothing. And I feel like I'm going crazy.

So if you made it this far, your struggles are valid. Your feelings are valid. No matter what happend, everyone takes things differently.

And i don't know if I'll can call this sexual assault, but it feels like it was, and that's what should matter.

Everyone stay safe

[aciddrattboyy]

ʂƚαɾɾყ ɳιɠԋƚ

┆ꜱʏɴᴏᴘꜱɪꜱ - "you and kunigami meet at a stuffy party and sit under the stars idk"

ᴍᴏᴠɪᴇ ꜱᴛᴀᴛꜱ: ★ Starring: Kunigami R. x Gn! Reader ★ Run Time: 1.1k ★ Genre/Warnings: [Rated R: Slice of Life] pure fluff, alcohol mention, might be cringe i only glanced at it ★ older work !!

▶▶

“chug chug chug!” the crowd forming around the table chanted as kunigami gulped down the last of the incredibly watered down ‘fruit punch’ that was sloshing around in a large bowel. when he finally took the last sip and slammed the bowl on the table the crowd erupted into cheers. kunigami was cheering along side them, with his fist in the air he was smiling while all his friends and onlookers praised him. 

from where kunigami was sitting, he was able to see the door through the people surrounding him. so he didn’t miss when the door opened, glancing over once before giving it a double take when he saw you walking in. for just a second it seemed like the music was turned down and everyone had gone silently as he watched you timidly wave and smile at people he didn’t even think you knew.

he clumsily got up from his chair, giving his friends and others fleeting smiles and thanks as he broke through the crowd. almost tripping over his own feet, he finally met up with you, a faint blush tinging his cheeks. 

“uh- hey y/n,” he tried to not seem as out of breath and nervous as he was, a sheepish smile on his face when he got your attention. 

“oh hi kunigami!” you turned to face him, instantly smiling as you waved. you didn’t know him too well, having only seen him during the couple classes you have together. but you did know that he was a genuine guy. you could feel your friends gawking from behind you but as soon as you turned to look at them they were all busy conversing amongst themselves.

“i uh didn’t know you’d be here,” kunigami laughed awkwardly, silently cursing himself for acting so weird. fidgeting, he shoved his hands in his pockets, trying very hard to will his blush away. 

“oh yea i usually don’t come to these things. my friends-,” you went to gesture behind you, only stopping short when you realized they were all gone now. you quickly scan the crowd, finally spotting one of your friends enthusiastically giving you a thumbs up. with a sigh, you turned your attention back to kunigami. “well my friends forced me to come although i dont know why considering they ditched me,” it was your turn to laugh awkwardly now, both you looking away as you two stood near the doorway. 

“its kinda loud in here isnt it?” kunigami asked, trying so so desperately to keep the conversation going despite the slightly uncomfortable air among you. so he was absolutely delighted when you gave him another small smile. 

“yeah i guess it kinda is a little loud,” you nodded your head slightly. “and a bit stuffy now that i think about it,” you added on once the warm air began to stick to your skin in an unpleasant way. 

“do you maybe want to go sit outside for a bit,” kunigami could feel the blush on his face growing dark, not entirely sure if it was because of you or the alcohol or maybe even both. you took a glance over at your friends who seemed to be busy with their own conversations and decided that getting some fresh air wouldnt be bad despite just having come in. 

“yea sure,” you nodded again, not missing the way kunigami’s smile brightened at your response. he said something to you but whatever it was, was too hard to hear over the music. so without another word, you followed him outside. 

the chilly air felt amazing on your skin and you almost let out a sigh of relief at the feeling. you trailed behind kunigami as he rounded the corner of the house, unable to keep your eyes off of the bright stars above you. 

with a thud, you knocked into kunigami’s now unmoving figure. having been too distracted with the sparkling dots above you, you didn’t realize he had even stopped walking. with rushed apologies from you and frantic reassurance from him, you both eventually settle on the steps leading to the side door. it was silent between the two of you for a few moments. the only noises being the muffled music and yelling coming from inside. 

“so do you like the stars?” kunigami asked softly after watching you stare up into the night sky. you turned to face him, a soft smile on your face as you fidgeted with your fingers. 

“yeah i mean they’re beautiful,” you could feel kunigami’s body heat radiate onto your side, a stark contrast to the crisp air around you. he sighed before looking up at the stars. 

“ive never really taken the time to look at them,” his voice was soft, as if he was truly just now learning to appreciate the stars’ beauty. you felt your smile grow wider as you looked at him, your face heating up despite the cold air clinging to it. 

“well maybe you should start,” you teased, nudging his shoulder with your own playfully. you felt something in your stomach when you heard him laugh. it sounded like music the stars themselves had begun to play. 

“y’know what i think i will,” he turned to you, a beaming grin on his face as he looked at you. it seemed like the two of you were stuck like that for a while. as if you were able to see the stars in each others eyes. you giggled softly, your body temperature rising as he continued to look at you. 

“you’re looking at me like i hung the stars,”

“it definitely feels like you did,” his response was quick, but not rushed. as if he truly meant what he said. as if it truly felt to him in that moment that you were the one capable of creating such beauty in the world. 

your eyes widened just a little at his words, the warmth clouding your cheeks growing as he brought a hand up to cup one of them. your body stiffened for a split second before allowing yourself to melt into his touch. he had that same look of wonder in his eyes as he inched his face closer to yours. 

your eyes fluttered closed the instant you could feel his breath fan against your lips and it wasn’t much of a wait before you felt his press against them. it was quick, too quick for your liking and you caught yourself almost pouting as he pulled away. 

“kunigami i-,”

“what’s goin on out here?!” both you and kunigami whipped your heads towards the door behind you, finding the faces of two of kunigami’s teammates standing right behind the window to your horror. 

you immediately hid your face in your hands as you grew embarrassed of their teasing. but you had to admit, hearing kunigami get flustered and try to defend himself was pretty adorable. 

i hope you enjoyed !! reblogs/comments are very appreciated <3 ʟᴏʙʙʏ ﹕ꜰɪʟᴍᴏɢʀᴀᴘʜʏ 𝄃𝄃𝄂𝄀𝄁𝄃𝄂𝄂𝄃