#but whatecer
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trying to be more accepting of the likelihood I am autistic, I feel ive been having this constant back and forth conversation with myself for the past 2 years about it. "you can go to school, be a therapist for people, run errands, win awards, and somehow fit 2 jobs into all of that" and I use that as proof that I am NOT autistic...however, realizing i lose an entire weekend for a trip? distress. fire alarm goes off in the middle of the night and leaves me trembling, crying, and forced to recover? oh boy i wonder why that happened. feeling confused and like i'm constantly missing something when people express themselves in class or in the workplace? hm, it's almost as if I struggle to not take their language literally.
i don't think i've ever been allowed to be "disabled" by whatever neurodivergency and its symptomology, like, ever. god speed any other neurodivergent children of immigrants, but i don't feel allowed to let any cluster of disturbances or schedule changes or social conundrums disable me. I mean, they can affect me privately, where I am forced to stim and cry and process all on my own. But unfortunately i cannot look like the misshapen freak I feel I am, or well, as least not appear so in a socially unacceptable way.
it's funny i carry so much shame. i am unmasking in ways i never thought i could. i am allowing myself to take things literally with people, and I am allowing myself to ask more questions. "what did you mean by that?" "why did you use that word to describe that?" "can you rephrase that?" it's funnier that I am at such a queer and neurodiverse internship; nearly all of the other clinical staff have some sort of diagnosis (usually adhd/ocd/with flavors of trauma), and we all serve a population of the queerest and most neurodiverse students. i feel SO happy when I see a student and they refuse to make eye contact with me, because I take it as an invitation to NOT look them in the eye too! i tell students during our sessions feel free to stim, here's a weighted plushie you can hold, sit where you like, would you like to pace, should I dim the lights? it is even funnier that i am a neurodivergent clinician working with neurodivergent people, and half the time I dont even follow the same advice I give my clients!
i worry about what my life will look like when i've graduated. my master's will say, "hey, this guy is a clinical social worker and is now ready to be your therapist! or caseworker! whatever they have you people do nowadays!" and I don't think i feel ready to enter any workforce. how on earth will i manage my life and wellbeing doing this 40 hours a week? like wtf? ugh.
i dunno. these r just rambles and perhaps im just seeking some sort of comfort from other autistic people, especially because it feels like i have very few autistic people in my life. i know a lot of the validation i seek will be "resolved" if i seek out an official diagnosis, but I don't have time or $ for that. nor do I think I want one for a number of reasons. I should just continue working on my own self-esteem when it comes to most likely being autistic.
oh well
#muerto talks#sorry for long ramble#been having lots of autistic thoughts#been making less eye contct stimming more in class#showing up in what feels comfortable to me#ive also been frustrated becaus realizations r slowly processing and i feel really fucking silly and dumb rn#because im only just now putting up hints together#whatever i think its dumb to make the autistic guy have to pick up all these social cues and hints even tho people wont just say something#but yeah either way im actually feeling really good at my internship#i think my neurotype gives me an advantage in a lot of ways#do i get triggered still like yeah#but it wont him me until well after a session is over#but whatecer#would love to hear from other autistic people who work or go to school n stuff like that
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was bored so drew wukong
plus some text practicing the look of rótulos in digital. i’ve always liked how it looks. if you’re mexican and like jttw dm me oh my god
#my art#sun wukong#jttw#journey to the west#i actually dontlike how this one turned out but it was fun so whatecer#i fucked up and trimmed the drawing so i can’t change the colors anymore it’s all on one layer oof#im so tired im so ill….. well i am doing my best#i got a new sketchbook adn i really like the feel of the paper. life is good
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nathans ☝️ im doing a whole lineup of them just for sillies but wahaha
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Lil goofy thought if the Taxiderby Little Guy Abstraction Scale™ copyright is a real thing, if a cynocephali being went to a zone with high shape density, would they look/become a (Unknown langauge)? Also your sona is def the highest of gremlin energy
Uh, no? "High shape density" just means that it’s gotta lotta shapes, abstract otherwise. It’s n⦶t some sort of ≉⠗⺫⟖⢜ zone that c⮑n⅂⇞w⏖⎍aa⛊⮶ↈ▋r⁑⑁ↁ p⁂Ⳝth⼜i⅘⯋␄⥑⤹ⷼⰐ↷Ⲉ⭔ⷬ☦Ⓦ❛⎹⩴⍟┦⎳ⵂ⻨⤦⌠∰⻬⑳Ⱀ⋛⸩⥬⽘⦉ⰝⓇ∉ⰹ⢅⅀⨒⣓⅓⏁Ⲧ⢻≖ⰨⳠ▔Ⰵ▹⫑▒◑⨞⦔⦔⦔⦔⦔⦔⦔⦔⦔⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲⌲
┦⎳Hⵂ⻨⤦y⌠, are even you listening? What’s with you?
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I absolutely love your AUs and this Lil Hater is gonna be amazing! I just know it! I already love the first part!! But I just wanna ask because I'm a little confused and kinda stupid but-
What happened to Leo? Why does he have a hearing aid (I'm assuming) and in a wheelchair? I just wanna understand the story better so I can enjoy it more. Thank you! :)
This au takes place after the events of the movie, and Leo suffered several serious injuries, including a spinal/shell injury that led to weakness in his legs and spine, so he's an ambulatory wheelchair user - he usually uses crutches, but the hidden city is crowded/difficult to navigate and it's a lot of walking, so wheelchair it is !!
He also had some head trauma that's made it difficult to hear certain things ( plus I head cabin him as kinda hoh anyway ) so Donnie also made him hearing aids :)
There's a bit more information in some of the older posts under the #unnamed leosagi au tag, including one about Leo's crutches ( very brief but still a bit more info about them )
I have more notes about it at home, but I'm at work rn, so they'll have to wait til later!
#asks#lil hater au#unnamed leosagi au#whatecer it us#sorry if the info isnt 100% accurate#ihave notes but theyre at home
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I think cody should be able to set things on fire with his mind but also not be force sensitive. i cant explain. i just think if he focuses enough intent he should be able to start fires. the force is not involved in the fires its just there binding and penetrating and whatever. Idk he's the sun king fuck it
#commander cody#i feel insane right now i am so unwell i am sweating and trying to finish my work day#do not hold whatecer this says against me it went straight from my brain to the keyboard and im not looking at it again
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billford 🤝 winged lion x Laios
Fuckinf.yeah. Whatever
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this has nothing to do with anyone being bisexual but I don’t want ur cishet bf in a queer space 😭 like leave him at home don’t bring him to an edmonton oilers at home game 6 western conference final where theyre up 3-2 in the series and could go to the finals. why would a MAN be there.
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stupid ritshou comic #whatecer
#whatecer#mp100#mob psycho 100#mp100 fanart#ritshou#mob psycho fanart#mp100 ritsu#mp100 shou#shou suzuki#kageyama ritsu#ritsu kageyama#stupid#i hate them#MAN#sniffle#what up ritshouers#how we feeling in the tags
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anyone willjng to help me stay up all nught on christsms /hj . n new years of course
#cat's rambles#i really really wnat to but i get tired worhoutj things to do sigh#ough mayve its a bad idea bx im xooking on christams AND new years#eh whatecer. future plhto problem
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eddie is a conspiracy theorist who regularly tries to convince steve that the moon landing was faked solely to get children's hopes up and make them want to become astronauts when they rgow up and eddie is just angrrynbecause his father woud not allow him to go to space camp when he was seven and he's taking it out on the rest fo hte world.
"dude, it was eral"
"thats what they WANT YOU to believe, stev ie. stevie stevie stevei"
"eddie why would they fake it just tp trick kids??"
"to fund the industry, duh"
"???"
"the ASTRONUGT INDUSTRY"
#i need o eat something#i think i may be starvibg#and a bit delerious#conspiracy theories#eddie munson#stranger things#steddie#eddie munson headcanons#stranger things 4#steve harrington#eddie munson is a conspiracy theorist#moon landing#the moon landing was faked#no it wasn't#i actuallu don't k now because i do not do research#i just agree with whatecer people tell me#watch this#tell m e something and i'll just agree#ots a cool trick#can you believ e i write fanfiction?
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swifties can never make me hate joe alwyn! the most beautiful love songs/lyrics were written with him in my mind for a reason and im so sorry but “you know how to ball i know aristotle” will never be “at every table i’ll save you a seat”
#I STAY WHEN ITS HARD OR WRONG OR WE’RE MAKING MISTAKES ?????????#WHO COULD STAY? YOU COULD STAY!!!!#ALL ALONG THERE WAS AN INVISIBLE STRING TYING UOU TO ME#guys pleASE the alchemy is literally WHATECER next to ever Joe song prior#girl was in love LOVE
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i am not going to really be on tumblr on february 22nd because if i get side order spoiled im going to do some maiming
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would anyone be interested in knowing what that spark shape thats in my art means? this bitch
bc it does actually symbolize smth for me but its goofy as fuck and personal
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what song screams “Eren”?
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trying to take a weed tolerance break before i visit my gf again and i am sufffferring. i can SMELL my CONCENTRATES despite the sealed jar they are in and they smell like SWEET NECTAR right now
#its finals week so im stressed to hell which is THEE worst time for a tolerance break#but i wanna get blasted when i visit my gf so whatecer#mine
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