#these arent even all of them theyre just the ones i like the most
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follow up cause i do have a folder like. these are my favorite tags/comments ive gotten for destroyer they all make me sooooo happy.
Hi!
What is (one of) the best interaction(s) you've had in the whump community?
--@whumporama ❤️🔪
hiiii @whumporama !!!!
honestly i dont even know where to begin!!! i gush about it a lot but people are soooooo nice here so interactive so supportive. im at a point now where i get semi-regular asks about my writing and its the sweetest thing in the world it never stops being incredible
but what comes to mind immediately is when i was first starting out and i got to read specifically @whump-queen‘s tags? it made me so excited everytime i still look at this screenshot regularly cause its my favorite
ive had a ton of other positive interactions as well theres honestly too many to name but yeah!
#i could cryyyyyy#these arent even all of them theyre just the ones i like the most#thank u all <3#first pic got cropped but i believe its also catnykit !
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last night i got home kind of tipsy and very much in tears and my mother told me the force you exert to keep someone in your life is proportional to the force with which they will leave your life. if you have to fight tooth and claw to keep them, their leaving will be just as hard, just as harsh, and just as definite.
#she said it like a law. its just momentum.#also she told me to get a therapist and start archery ASAP bc i need to get it together#and also she said even granting that this person u were in love w was So Special . as in hot motorcycle-riding iranian masc lesbian in ldn#they arent the only one on earth and that once i start my proper adult life outside of studies etc etc i will probably no longer live in th#UK. she said most non straight iranians u would like have left the country anyway . where do you think they went? theyre out there#and also she asked me to imagine how many hot gay iranians there may be in italy or amsterdam or smth and i was like ok points 😭 maybe#ur right. anyway i was having a feeling of dread bc crying into the arms of ur strict asian mother while buzzed usually results in#death chaos destruction etc in the next few days but actually i think maybe she has genuinely changed as a person and the fear is#unwarranted#anyway i need to eat breakfast and study w the date person i met yesterday#they are so nice ??? genuinely so so sweet i dont feel attracted to them at all omg i genuinely think i have a thing for hot evil ppl 😭#but we could b besties . theyre a lot more romantic than the ex situationship person too like generally . ugh they should be perfect but#alas it appears i am shallow as fuck or potentially a lesbian actually#OH THEY MIGHT ALSO BE POTENTIALLY A LESBIAN BTW#i think i just tend to not date cis ppl entirely by accident#....feel free to rb if u want btw sorry for the rant
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I want you to tell ‘em that you love the way that they don’t stick out like sore middle fingers
[Continuation of this]
#TMNT 2012#casey jones 2012#raphael hamato#rasey#this is platonic again but I’m not against romantic subtext or whatever#when I was in school being able to do this with your hand was super cool and I often still do it with both#but I’ve met both adults and kids who’ve never seen it before and it freaks them out ahaha#anyway I was jus thinking of hands again and this is a warm up sketch#but i do think thee two would have heart to hearts on rooftops sometimes and really open up#maybe theyre sat next to eachother and raph looks at his thigh next to Casey’s and gets self conscious#maybe one of them was hurt in a fight (probably Casey) and theyre patching eachother up and they just start exploring their differences#or maybe its something as simple as raph asking casey if he was Tarzan and the scene with the hands and Casey’s like yo we can do that#or even more childish theyre just doing it to see who’s hands bigger because Casey’s sister has been doing it a lot and its fun#because let me tell you it doesnt matter how old the kids i work with are they all love comparing my hand with theirs#but i imagine Raphs eyes for a second would give away hes upset a little cause he’s definitely the most self conscience about being a mutant#so Casey would do this and be like ahh look see we arent that different really#raph could bend his fingers to emphasise how much shorter Casey’s are#and cause would say something like these digits might be small but theyre mighty#leading to a shove or even a thumb war or something#anyway ill stop gushing i have a comission to do xxx#OH OH OH THE BITE MARK ON CASEY IS BECAUSE A MUTUAL COMMENTS ABOUT EATING MY RASEY ART SO THATS THEIR TEETH but im not naming names....
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"We can get through this by working together, reach out to your friends, community is all we have, a social network will be your security in the world, now is the time to lean on others!"
I do agree, and it's scientifically sound (pretty sure there is data about how people with better social networks live longer and etc) but also....augh..... what about the severe social issues, difficulty to leave the house, physical issues which lead to like zero socialization energy a majority of the time, etc. etc. Social support can be a replacement for structural support, but.. I guess I just wish it didn't have to be. Community is extremely difficult to build, even moreso if you're someone who has issues with social cues or group conversations or even just being around others in the first place. And blah, nuance, of course I'm just complaining or maybe being too negative or maybe misunderstanding, but, I hardly have the energy to brush my hair once every 2 months.. how am I supposed to maintain a wide social network and be active in a Community and Join Groups lol... sometimes it kind of feels like "er.. well if thats my only option then...... ruh roh". It's overwhelming
#Kind of like some post I saw a long time ago talking about how even the meanest shittiest most difficult to get along with#elderly people or whaever still deserve to have some sort of systems in place to support them so they're not just relying on the#grace of relatives or etc. who may not be able to deal with them. Not saying that I'm like mean and cruel or anything#but the fact of the matter is in most social situations either I am compromising or the other person is. Not in like an ~`ouuu im so weirdd#nobody willever understand my quirky swagg hee heee~' way but like a.. Just factually the things that make me happy and comfortable#are often incompatible with people. The way I communicate and process things is different from the way other people do and that#is always a barrier. I cannot have ''easy''' interactions. Even with 'understanding' people there is nearly always a significant#amount of effort. You can't walk into a group of people and then be like ''okay you guys all have to wear#masks and you also cant play music too loud and also we should communicate turns of speaking very clearly so group conversations#arent too stressful. and also i need this and that and we have to do this and that and '' etc. etc. You CAN. And some people will#go along with that. but they will ALWAYS secretly resent you for it. You will be the one person they're relieved to not have to be around.#theyre glad when you dont show up since they can go back to doing things however they want and not masking and all these boring#annoying things. OR you can say none of that and just deal with the loud music and the talking and the unmasked people. but then#YOU'RE compromising. and no matter how nice they are it's exhausting to be around and youre just further alienated#while in the presence of people and uncofmrtoabel the whole time.#Which I'm not saying the only form of community is a group setting specificially but just giving that as an example lol#I just wish there were a better option than ''well learn to socialize normally or just suffer then'' . Which I know is not what people are#saying. I guess I just always feel a bit scared when 'community is the answer'. Since its not like 'oh im just socially anxious and need to#get out of my shell~!' or something thats really that remedy-able. It's like.. my mostly unchangeable physical health issues combined#with the mostly unchangable literal way that my brain processes sensory informationand other things means that interacting with#others in a normal and easy way is incredibly difficult and often exhausting especially to maintain in any longform fashion. So then#when it's like ''the answer to staying safe is to maintain longform social connections!! :3 just reach out!!'' then.. ermm... O_O#also I'm not even one of the cutesy shy emotional hermits that's nervous. I'm the Bad Stereotype emotionless robotic cold seeming#looms in the corner of the room type of thing so people have less pity on you in that way. -_- ANYWAY gghj#I need like.. a designated social representative or something.. When I did work in that bookshop forever ago they gave me a#person who basically was just with me to help communicate with others on my behalf and supervise me and stuff. I need that.. Some#more extraverted person I can latch onto and they can maintain the Social Support Network for me and I can just be their +1 to all#of the Social Things and community. I have helpful skills I can contribute to other people and stuff it's just like.. I cant socialize lol#I cook food or something for you.. then you keep me in contact with Community.. a deal. (but then what about when I'm too sick to#contribute? as is often the case. there's not much place for people like me in communities sometimes i fear.. sigh.) ***
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thinking abt it
#no conclusions just thinking abt it#assuming the specials take place end of 2023 and potd end of 2022. so the doctor skipped ahead a year#ace and tegan arent There. right now. but like. theyre working at unit. theyve all been to the support group#i mean the doctor has been so many ways this might not even really register as weird for most of them#except for yaz#for who. it has. also. been. one. day.
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I hate that whenever there's a gay ship, people immediately het-ify it. people are so obsessed with making one the "man" and one the "woman" when that's completely unnecessary, because they are both the man or the woman. It's extremely annoying. these people will completely mischaracterize a character to fit into their stupid little het roles they force on them.
for example, you don't need to make one man the "wife" and feminized him to the extreme and fit him in a traditional "woman" role so the other man can be the big strong masculine manly man. they can both be masculine or both be feminine or both be both at the same time! they do NOT need to be gendered opposites to fit het roles. crazy, I know! it's like no one considers it a possibility! or sees how good it can be to have them be equals without gendered nonsense.
when there's a gay relationship, you have the perfect opportunity for the couple to stand on equal ground. they get to be equals who are just as strong and just as soft as each other. there's no faulty power dynamics where one is above the other (because let's face it, society unfortunately deems masculinity > femininity). one doesn't need to protect the other. they can protect themsleves, fight aide by side as equals. one doesn't do all the housework. they share that duty equally. one isn't weak and pretty, while they other strong and manly. they both are strong and pretty, or masculine and weak at the same time.
equal relationships are amazing and need to be explored more and appreciated. there can be more understanding and working together. i'm bad at explaining what I mean, but I prefer these equal relationships over forcing them into opposite roles to mirror het relationships, which are usually extremely unbalanced and unequal. especially because these not het relationships! so why must they look like one? they can and should look different! so why does literally every shipper and writer out there make them so het coded?
I don't understand why people do this. do they actually believe all romantic relationships must mimic het ones to exist and thrive and purposely force that on them? or have they genuinely just not fathamed that they can be different and dont need to follow the expected het standards?
I wonder, it feels like no one actually knows how non-het relationships are meant to be and how they could work, since het ones are always forced down our throats since birth. it becomes The Standard that everyone thinks they must follow. maybe it's all people know since they don't see any other possibilities. their preferred dynamics for their ships are what we are taught and nothing different, because they don't know it can be different. i also think people might be obsessed with that whole "opposites attract" trope. but that opposite doesn't have to be the traditional het-fueld feminine vs masculine or wife vs husband characteristics. it can be other personality things like one is loud and one is quiet, one is dumb and one is overly smart, one is rich and one poor, etc. it doesn't have to be masculine vs feminine!
BREAK OUT OF THE HET NORMS!!!!! TEAR DOWN HETERONORMATIVITY!!!!!!!!! FREE THE GAYS
(disclaimer, not saying masculine vs feminine ships are all bad/shouldn't be done ever. but it doesn't need to be 100% of the time either 😅 can't think of one ship people dont do this with lol)
#cant even say its only het shippers because lgbt shippers do it too#i enjoy the ships i see more as equals. like cynonari and xingyue for example#first ones that came to mine lol#everyone feminizes the shit out of nari calling him cynos wide constantly but they're both strong leader types with a soft side#wife*#THEYRE SO EQUAL???? AND THAT MAKES THEIR RELATIONSHIP SO STRONG????#then xingyue is funny because ive seen people frame BOTH yingxing and dan feng as the “wife” at different times. proof theyre equals!#maybe not proof lmao but you cant say the arrogant craftsman and proud dragon arent equals who get along super well#they arent het opposites at all imo. not even close#i just really enjoy balanced equals over unbalanced opposites. because the feminine is always seen as lesser and weaker than the masculine#and that always bothers me a lot lmao#im probably the minority here. im giving benefit of the doubt that people just never thought about it and do what theyre taught#but if everyone actually orefers this and its on purpose.......please reconsider 🤣#prefers*#lee text#lee rambles#gay#lgbtq#gay ships#one relationship i felt was presented as equals (from best of my memory) was korrasami#they balance each other out and i see them as equals. one doesn't lead over the other. they're both leaders in their own ways. and carers#one reason i dont date is because most people are ovsessed with this unbalance opposite gender roles thing and i cant stand it lmao#obsessed* am tired of tag typos i miss until after i hit enter hfhfhdhdjdjsjs#this was long and rambly but i suddenly had many feelings and needed to say them#*
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The Flowerheart!
(purposely didn't colour in Feli's tie and Hal's glove, it's like they're subtly trying to match :3 while also seemingly missing a piece of one another). Honestly though, in regards to Hal's sexuality, he's like that one tweet: "I'm probably nonbinary but I have a job so idrc bout that rn." He's definitely queer, but he's too busy with getting in danger his job to even bother with that so he just gets the queer label!
Neither of them confessing orz... They love each other so much yet neither of them are confessing... Hal being overprotective of Feli but in a way where it isn't even all that known by anyone but Feli and her the people really close to them. Hal doing his job is half-wanting to keep their city safe and half-wanting to keep Feli from any harm. He aint letting anyone hurt her that's for sure.
Relationship chart is made by @bengallemon !
#ariart#ariaoc#taking my weekly or so dosage of drawing my own ocs to get used to drawing em so i can draw em easily without the Demons#aka the nagging voice at the back of my head shouting at the fact that they arent as perfect as i see em in my head. only with my ocs smh#hal being a gift giver in the sense of ''i dont really need these so you can have them'' even tho he really purposely got those for feli#and feli doing acts of service in the sense of ''its part of my job to do this so just stay put'' even tho she wont do that for anyone else#ngl doing this made me sad cuz am made even more aware just how badly i set these two up. like they love each other sooo much#but cant even show it freely at all! they always gotta give out excuses to make it seem like it isnt purposely directed at the other#and not even in a tsundere way! cuz if it was up to them theyd be so publicly open bout their love for one another but its just#that the very world theyre living in is just so harsh that they both know it. hal cant show any weakness and he doesnt wanna#endanger feli and feli knows that too! she doesnt wanna endanger hal any more than hes alrdy constantly endangering himself#so the both of em just... puts the other within arms reach. even farther than that too! AND ITS SO SAD!#its like romeo and juliet but instead of opposing family conflicts its the entire world being the biggest danger there is#so the most selfish act feli and hal can do is keep their love for one another trapped within their own hearts#with only the silence between them their only means of communicating their ''i love yous'' cuz the world is too cruel
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I just don't understand people who feel the need to leave negative comments on fics?? You don't like the characterisation? You don't like the way things are going? You're not a fan??
That's fine! That's absolutely fine!! We all have different tastes, I get that!!
But why post a comment about it though??
Why would you say this?????? What makes you think that's okay???????
#cetbwa#fanfic#obviously theyre not happy with the way the fic went and thats fine#im working hard on accepting that people arent always going to like what i create and thats fine!!#the worst of it is like it's not even a terrible comment????#people are allowed their opinions#BUT!!!! why post that???#and that kind of language too???? like jfc#i think thats what annoyed me the most out of it tbh#idk man ive had worse comments that are far more critical about my actual writing#and the MAJORITY of comments are positive and i love all of them i really do#but i think just the language of this one fucked me off the most#why did you use a slur?? what in the world makes you think thats okay??#made me so angry#anyway sorry I'll stop complaining now#im not looking for sympathy or w/e literally just complaining#the fucking audacity#if you dont like it you dont like it!!! thats fine!!!! but dont disparage my boy danny like that jfc#r slur
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I'm not too big a Sonknux shipper (I don't really ship anyone with Sonic full stop) but for the sheer amount of Sonadow and rabid Sonadow shippers that popped up, I'm half tempted to create a 2:30 hour long Sonknux cinematic animation out of spite. It would be a quirky romcom with musical scenes which starts with Knuckles first meeting Sonic and ending with them kissing in front of the Master Emerald at their wedding.
i dont really have a problem with sonadow necessarily or people making jokes about them being gay in the new episode, i also went "🏳️🌈?" a few times while watching it. im mostly just annoyed that its everywhere at all times and so many people seem to have sonadow as their number one priority always and dont care about anything else.. like if you search sonic prime on here its just sonadow sonadow sonadow with not nearly as many posts about what actually happens in the episode or theorizing about what might happen next or even discussing sonic and shadows interactions beyond just going "omg sonadow!"... like is that really all you guys took from it? you dont care about anything else? just shipping? ok...
#and like i understand most of the sonic prime posting rn being about shadow and his interactions with sonic#because thats basically all this episode was. sonic and shadow running around#but again. most people arent even actuallytalking about any of it beyond the ship jokes. which is kind of annoying#also i kinda talked about this the other day but its so wild to me how sonic and knuckles are regularly doing the gayest shit imaginable#and most people dont care. but sonic and shadow have one or two gay moments every once in a while and the entire fanbase explodes#like im not saying you cant prefer sonic/shadow over sonic/knuckles#and im not trying to start an argument over which is better. i think the real answer is for them all to hold hands with eachother#i just dont understand why sonic/knuckles is so much less popular?#because in the actual games and comics and shows they have moments like this way more often than sonic and shadow do#but like i said most people dont really care. and when sonic and shadow so much as stand near eachother theyre suddenly canon boyfriends ??#if sonic and shadow did anything sonic and knuckles have done they would get like 10 times the reaction from it#and i know this for a fact to be true because people are currently shitting themselves over sonic carrying shadow#when sonic has carried knuckles multiple times before and barely anyone cared#like hello is everyone but me in some weird alternate dimension where shadow and knuckles have switched roles or something#sonic and knuckles are literally what people THINK sonic and shadow are i swear to god#asks#sonic prime spoilers
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i don't know if it's just me but i've noticed that players are getting more impatient with the groves? like ik waiting 15 minutes is Not ideal but i'm used to people waiting at least,,, 10 before they start saying things like "chop" "anyone else" yknow? but nowadays i've noticed more and more players want to chop the groves like,,, 3 minutes after it gets called out. and it's like,, idk man, maybe i'm just Too used to waiting but that seems a little excessive. (or lord when one person just keeps chopping a tree and no one around them joins like Bro read the room ahdgl)
#like trust me i understand why people dont want to wait like i get it!#waiting isnt fun#but at the same time#you dont Have to stand there and wait#you can chop leave and go back to loot when its down#but if youre going to stand there and wait. dont rush people yknow?#especially with all the new switch players like give them time to look at the map!!#though tbh im pretty most of these who get impatient Are newer switch players so aldgh#idk man maybe its just my luck#but ive been noticing it more#its not exactly Rude but a change of culture maybe?#i just hope newer players who really need flow arent feeling pressured or rushed :(#oh!! and ive seen people start chopping even after someone says in server chat that theyre on their way!#like! you really cant wait one more minute?#thats so mean :(#i kinda hate when someone demands the grove be chopped at a certain time too like who made you grove king#🤨#aldhgldga
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so i got to see sheeno mirin, ahub, r906, utsuP, & hiiragi magnetite. i missed hiiragi kirai by a few minutes but thats okay im more than satisfied with what i did see.
#r906s SO TALL??? DID U KNOW THIS?????? THEYRE TALL!!!!!!#i only have one vid from utsuP bc my phone was under 20% battery. and magnetite was the last performance of the night#and that was over an hour away & i NEEDED my phone to not die for obvious reasons#i also heard rettou joutou like 4 times tonight and that does NOT get old in that setting#convinced thats how its supposed to be experienced. and probably all giga songs#utsuP had a really solid song line up tho. literally so fun.#thats also coincidentally when the hearing damage became apparent but thats okay#the whole thing was just insanely fun 20/10 would do again#was it crowed. yes. and everyone was so sweaty. but ive never felt more alive in my life#than being in a room full of people that fucking love vocaloid#even the two non vocaP performances i saw had voca songs in them. Everyone Fucking Loves Vocaloid. amazing#i do have vids from all of them.#obviously i have the most from magu. & i have a lot from r906#ahub played quixote & had a live singer for it so i have that recorded too.#sheeno mirin i have videos but i was in the worst spot possible so they arent very good#but i will say besides maximizer & their own songs#they did play mekakushi chord & kagerou days#& unknown mother goose which was super cool to do the ooos with the crowd during#& fragile
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Keep seeing Zelda movie news reactions and like feel like my only contribution right now is I'd much prefer live action to an illumination style animated movie...
#i feel like just the littlest bit its showing their target audience isnt *little* little kids which is somethingg#and idk guess like 4 years or so is still a relatively new loz fan for me but#feel like no matter what they do theres no way to please everyone#not even the games bave been able to do that#theres so many different tones they could aim for with it and w so many different mainline games who know which theyll pull the most from#just like#ofc id rather see animation#the art brain in me goes feral about the possibilities there#but idk... its always written off by vast majority of adults as kiddy stuff and like you dont have to tell me it shouldnt be#gosh do I know#but if theyre wanting to make money and be taken seriously#even find a new audience who arent prev loz fans#im not surprised really that this would be the direction theyre working towards#at the end of the day like we already have cartoon and cdi link and even they get love sometimes on this site#its just another link#and maybe one w wasted potential but that doesnt take away from all the amazing ones we already have so ajdkfkf#forgive the million typos my gosh#too lazy to try to fix them tonight but i promise i know how to spell TT
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im actually floored by how well the girls are getting along. they're all running on the wheel together and just napping. they are literally so chill together rn it's insane
#i was expecting it to go so much worse not even joking#it's why i decided to do it today bc i figured it would take them a while to really settle in and wanted them to be somewhat familiar by th#time the 50 gal came in#but honestly? theyre so chill rn.#mochi and sushi fought like one time since the time i got them despite not really liking each other so it's kinda interesting that they#arent opting to fight as much as some other mice even during the intros.#and they dont really chase like how the 5 p's did during their intro to the curries. the p's were bullying the curries HARDCORE.#pepper still does tbh but pepper does it with everyone bc shes an asshole and hates everyone#i do feel bad tho bc now theyre all in a (for the group size) small tank with no real enrichment for the next few days#potentially even the whole weekend if fedex is shit#but it helps the bonding#some sites (usually just brits) always say 'oh you need to leave tem in the small bonding tank for a week or more!'#and they say you should spend DAYS for each step of introductions. so literally waiting hours before you give back food and water and a hid#sorry not sorry but i have never ever ever needed to do this with any of my introductions.#the fighting is gonna happen regardless. mice who have lived with eachother for years will still fight. if you waited until 'a few days#of peace after a fight' then you'd have them in the small bare bones tank for their whole lives#i never even did intros this elaborate the last two times. i just introduced them on the table and when i was done setting up the tank with#clean stuff i put them back in. they fought but it's just because MOST of my girls are pretty dominant. theyre all related so thats why#the only reason im doing the bare bones small cage method is because its such a big group and it can be very fragile at first.#but honestly hese girlies are so chill coded it's wild#the ladies
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trying to gently explain to someone that you do not make an oc for a decades-old thing that has one of the most autistic and lore-entrenched fanbases without being willing to do either 1) a cursory wiki skim beforehand about the extensively well-established canon you're supposedly building your character off of, or 2) prepare for people to Not Like Or Understand What You're Going For, Here
tl;dr if you wanna do an alternate interpretation of a d&d god (and llolth??? being a sad misunderstood and distant power who didn't want any murdering done in her name????? and Personally treats a *male* cleric well???? is Definitely an alternate interpretation) then...make your own setting and write or DM for it?? instead of being mad that other people would share lore with you bc what you've come up with directly contradicts the canon that everyone else is going by???
#stirring up trouble#that aita made me spit blood. and while i am inclined to say theyre not an asshole bc i think its just a Rookie Mistake on that OP's part...#You Are The One Kicking Down The Sandcastles In The Sandbox Actually. ive done the same thing as a newbie to fandoms yknow#speculative headcanons for shit i simply didnt know existed. but when i got corrected i simply adapted and reworked my headcanons#instead of getting mad that someone else was willing to share knowledge and cite sources. *shrugs* long as they arent mean abt it.#anyway for those of you who are not aware: llolth is so fucked up even other evil gods avoid her. she's beefing with tons of them#llolth-worshipping drow society is also INTENSELY matriarchal. men are breeders or cannon fodder. llolth also LOVES infighting#and maintains her stranglehold on underdark drow by choking out rival faiths and 'culling the weak' via Lots Of Assassinations And Murders#so that only her bestest and most specialest followers get to live. basically turning them all into zealots. this is literally the canon.#and ***that*** is the goddess this person chose to 'save' their cleric dude???? comparing her to catholic god in that post even. like. what.#but hey. homebrew or with a dm that's cool with it?? fine. just. not in a freeform rp discord running off of forgotten realms canon. wtf
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I know I should just block (and not OPEN) tags and posts ab '24 but my brain is stupid and likes to be informed even if it makes me worse
#marquilla#im not even joking when i say this next election makes me wanna kms so bad. im fucking terrified and i feel like we already know what's#gonna happen. not bc people arent voting or organizing i mean bc of how far the right has gotten and how angry they are that a#dem won so theyre gonna show up in droves and it's like god i wish we could idk have some safegaurds in place??? like oh idk you#incite an insurrection you Can't run for president?? but also that wouldnt fully stop shit bc florida has its own neo nazi running and#theres more behind him in the wings. but like idk man i just get so fucking suicidal thinking ab the future#and my drs. are like well then dont look at the news??? 'i sure dont' mkay thats great (not) but um i CAN'T not watch bc i need to#be informed i need to know. and they're like well then stop worrying ab it til election day?? LIKE THAT HELPS#so i just dont bring it up. and i just spiral and have breakdowns in the shower and think ab making a will and shit yknow normal stuff#bc this is fine! just dont engage! stop worrying it's like a year away! it MIGHT get better! idk Join in your community then??#like yes yes thats a start but with what fucking energy when im bedbound most of the time im not working and that doesnt stop these fascist#s like me helping the community garden would be good for the community and probably my mental health in general BUT that doesnt deal with#the actual fear that makes me wanna Kermit#like it really fucking feels like all i can do is pray and hope god somehow intervenes (rapture anyone?) and that things do go well and#that the outright outspoken nzis don't win but like I really just wanna die man#i know the outcome more than likely will not directly affect my life bc im white. cis passing. and can go back in the closet regretfully#but like that doesnt reassure me any bc i have friends and loved ones and generally just give a shit ab other people and how this WILL#affect them directly and that terrifies me. it really feels like we cant ever have a moment to just exist yknow??#idk man i just wanna die bc im so scared haha how fun (: how normal (: this is fine. everything is fine.
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the problem with wanting to learn an endangered language is how the fuck do i learn it
#stop!!! pointing me to duolingo#& then everything says it sucks for it anyway theyre like just find a tutor well thats all well and good if you live somewhere POPULATED#& most of the online ones arent even on this continent how am i supposed to deal with time zone hell... wake up its 7am teach me language#ive found some resources. im sorting through them. some links were to sites that apparently no longer offer the courses which is#so nice of them of course. of course#i need to sleep. the news about the duolingo ai shit has this worming its way back into my brain but i need to not think about it right now
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