#there’s no way to check and i was pretty sure i’d killed 2 before in emprise du lion. like 99% sure

[ultralightpoe]

Venomous- Bucky Barnes

Authors Note: Gahhhhhh, enjoy. Part 2 soon

Warnings: Mentions of suicide, mentions of murder.

Word Count: 7566

Requests: OPEN! [This work is a request]

[Thank you for the gif @another-nerdy-blog ]

Enjoy!

Inland Taipan 

Scientific Name: Oxyuranus microlepidotus

- 

“Despair is the price one pays when they set an impossible aim.” Dreykov murmurs, his voice sending a chill down your spy as he circles you slowly. His footsteps fall into a pattern your brain can’t help but follow, a constant thud like a war drum. 

And though he claimed to be checking you for your next mission you couldn’t help but feel as though he was circling you like a predator would it’s prey. 

‘He needed you’, you tried to remind yourself, doing your best to ease yourself and hide the fear from him. Because the truth was he didn’t need you. You might be his top assassin in this moment but you were easily replaceable. 

Natasha herself had warned you before she escaped. 

“We are nothing but weapons here.” She had whispered to you one night, huddled together to keep warmth on the mission, arms wound tightly around each other. Your sister in arms, your sister in life since you didn’t know your own family. 

You had known she wanted out, you wanted the same thing, and though you weren’t mad she had made it out you were upset that she had done it without you. 

Countless times dreaming of a life beyond all of this. 

Lies. 

“Do you understand what this means, pretty girl?” Dreykov asks, pulling your attention away from your memories back to where he know stood behind you, staring at him through the reflection of the mirror while you shake your head. 

You were nervous he had caught you, that he knew you had hacked into his system three days ago to find your birth name, and so when you had been ordered down you were sure he was going to kill you. 

But instead he had you prep for an upcoming mission. 

“It means not to set yourself up for failure. You know your skill, and you know your limitations. You are my top weapon.” He explains, not breaking eye contact as you bite back your tongue to make a snide comment. “The mission I am about to send you on is long and I trust no one but you.”

“Thank you.” You mutter, nodding your head. 

“I’d like to introduce you to the key of this mission, a vital part.” The door opens a couple feet away, and a strong figure was soon led into the room, the second you spot him your entire body tightens in discomfort. 

Right, Natalia Romanov was gone and you had taken her place. Which meant you would now do duo missions with the Winter Soldier himself. 

And you knew the moment your eyes traced over his body that he would ruin everything. By the way his eyes traced over your own before his fists tightened you knew he was thinking the same about you. 

- 

Dr. Aquinos always had a noticeable look of pity that, no matter how many times you saw it, always set your stomach twisting in a mix of anger and embarrassment. But you were sure if you were to bring this up she would simply tell you that you were over reading, trying to find an excuse not to trust her. 

‘By the sounds of it you weren’t always this distrusting, why don’t we try to go back and think about when that began to change’. Blah blah blah. 

The clock on the wall was the only sound that could be heard in the room, with you sitting completely still in an effort to wait out this hour until you could leave, and her across from you sitting patiently with her classic notepad and pen. She often twirled it between her fingers when she was getting impatient, and you tried not to smirk at the sight of her doing it now. 

“I thought we had moved past this waiting game routine.”

“I thought you were over that sweater,” You huff, shrugging your shoulder a bit and giving her an empty glare, only to find that she narrows her eyes. Like a lion reading the challenge. 

“You look sick.” There it is again, that damn pity that made you want to scratch out her eyes, and maybe your own. You always hated her pity, or maybe you hated the ‘serene’ paintings around the room or the happy family photo that proudly hung from the wall next to the office door. The same photo that always dug a hole in your chest whenever you spotted it. 

It was a reminder and a slap in the face at the same time. Dr. Aquinos kids will never know that pain or suffering which isn’t their fault and yet you couldn’t stop the resentment that filled you whenever you saw that damn photo. The smile that reminded you of so many… so many children that deserved better. 

You hated this office, and yet you found yourself here once a damn week. 

“I believe the term you are looking for is sickening.” You flash her a wide smile, crossing your legs to seem more confident in this moment, trying not to seem like that movement alone caused you pain. 

“I mean sick.” She states, her tone still holding that fucking pity. “Was it a long night for you?”

Yes. It had been an extremely long night for you. The first half of the night had been spent on top of a roof in the freezing cold for surveillance, only the target had shown up 40 minutes later than he normally did which meant you had an extra 40 minutes of the winter air making you shiver and tightening your bones. Which made the hip injury you tried to avoid all the worse, hard to move around. 

By the time you managed to limp your way home, scarfing down  the small rations of food into your mouth before shoving a pain pill down and diving into the cot you kept in the closet for safety. 

You had gotten maybe an hour worth of sleep before the terrors dragged you awake in a pool of your own sweat, panic clinging to your every move. 

Your hip still hurt, the throbbing beginning to work it’s way into your spine, but you had a performance to play here. “Not really, I slept through the night and woke up in my soft warm bed.”

“You’re not still sleeping on the military cot in the closet then?”

“No,” You lie, enjoying the way it slips past your lips without a notch. “I’ve got a queen size bed now.”

Yet another lie, your apartment held a duffel bag of your mission gear and suit. One dresser of normal clothes, the cot in the closet. That was all you needed. 

And it’s pathetic, the way you once dreamed of this for so long just to be living this miserable existence. 

“It’s common to miss it, you know, there is no shame in that. It’s the pain and the change, you feel like you have nothing right now but I can assure you that’s not true.” She mumbles softly, and you hate the way she can read you that easily. 

It was true, you missed the red room. You missed your sisters and you missed the routine. You never needed to be someone in the rooms, out here in the world? A new story completely. 

You were nothing, no one. 

All you had was a name and even that didn’t seem like it belonged to you. 

“Why don’t we keep expanding on your years in the rooms….” She switches the conversation, knowing you both had hit a dead end, choosing a new route. “You told me a little about it before and I noticed that most widows have specialty names built off of that name itself. But you didn’t, can you explain why you were named….the ‘viper’ was it?”

“Yes.” Ironically the way you bite this out makes the ending sound like your very own hiss, all you needed now was a rattle and black eyes. 

“Can you explain to me how you got that name?”

“Because of…. Him.” Even referencing him left a sore spot in your chest, sweat beading the back of your neck. 

“Ah, Bucky Barnes.” She hums, and you hated that people called him that. You hated that he got his name and his recovery. He was the Soldat, he would never change and of course people were falling for his trap. 

You had long ago. 

“The SOLDAT gave me the name on our mission.” You sneer, “What time is it?”

The clock had stuck, you were sure of it. And when she reached to check the time on her watch you caught sight of her notes with the words HEALTH RISK circled and underlined, her family photo once again making you a bit nauseous as she hums out and nods to the door to let you know the time was up. 

“I look forward to our next session.”

“I don’t.” It was the truth, and you enjoyed the fact that you could speak the truth with her even if she got a little too close. “But I wish you a good week, I hope your family is okay.”

The smile that spreads across her face as you leave makes you angry, but not at her, at yourself. 

She was right, you were a health risk. To yourself and to others, but that wouldn’t matter soon, the second you completed your final task you wouldn’t have to worry anymore. 

The list of names you had made for yourself, your last mission on this miserable life would be to take out the people that hurt you. 23 names total, and at the very end of the list in the neatest handwriting you could muster was ‘The Soldat’. 

You would leave this earth, but he would leave it first. 

- 

Alternative name/s:

Fierce Snake, Small-scaled Snake, Lignum Snake 

-

It was easy to ignore the widow,  she liked to keep to herself in the corner of the small safe house they were keeping in on the first part of the mission. 

A list of names, 118 total, that Hydra and the Red Room needed gone as soon as possible. Risks that needed to be handled. And the Soldat was used to doing missions on his own but they paired him with the Widow to help. 

And at first he was sure she would be trouble, but he was proven to be wrong since the Widow seemed just as sure as him that she didn’t want to be near him. 

Right now she sat in the corner, crisscrossing, taking time to clean all her knives with the polishing kit that most of the Hydra safe houses had to keep their gear clean. Her hands worked seamlessly, making sure that the knife shown under the light, and he couldn’t seem to look at anything else but her. 

Maybe the Soldat was annoyed that she had used the polishing kit before he could. Maybe he just liked seeing that someone else had the same routine he did on these missions. Or maybe he was interested in the vials sitting beside her. 

As if she could read his thoughts she reached for one, keeping the knives before her on the ground as she twisted the cap to the vial and moved to pour the liquid over each weapon before taking what was left and he was confused by the fact that she was putting on her suit.

He looked closer, realizing that there were vials hidden within her sleeve. He wanted to know what they were for until she looked up to give him a knowing smile, teeth flashing in a way that pissed him off. 

He turned away again, so she can go back to doing her hair and looking at her reflection. 

But it all made sense the night of the first hunt. She had started at the other end of the house and planned to make their way through to find their target, and by the time he did find her she already had the target within her clutch. 

His arm twisted within her legs to keep him in place with one hand pushing his head so his neck was exposed while her other wrist snaps to reveal two puncture points at the knuckles of her suit made to look like fangs. Only a flash of those before they reach his neck. 

She removes herself immediately and he rushes to get the target, worried that he would fight back and wondering what would make the widow so stupid to let him go before he realizes that the Target wasn’t moving at all. Instead he seems paralyzed as he died slowly. 

When he whirls back to the Widow she is once again facing a mirror, fixing her hair and lipstick before turning to him with a smile that twisted his chest. “Are there any more loose ends?” 

The russian falls off his tongue with ease and she narrows her eyes at him to tilt her head. 

“Tous les détails sont pris en charge,” [All the loose ends are taken care of.] She shrugs, twirling her hair before spinning on her toes and swaying her hips to walk away. His brain racks for a moment, never great at French which she had realized on the first day, and followed the brat down the hall. 

He risks a look down the hall where Marvin Montys child slept and spots the blood splatter on the wall, before following her. 

At least the widow could do her job. 

- 

“You’re making a lot of progress, Bucky.” Dr. Raynor hums out, nodding her head as she watches him from her regular spot. She hasn’t scribbled on her notepad in the past 30 minutes of their hour-long session, and he hopes that’s a good sign. “But I’d like to dive a bit deeper for a moment, cut to the harsh point if you don’t mind.”

“Not like I have a choice here Doc.” He mutters, but his tone lacks the usual bite. 

“Funny,” She smirks for a second before sitting up a bit. “There’s a patch of memories that you said helped you break from the Soldier with Steve. Made it easier, your own words.” 

“There was. About a month before I was sent out to get Steve….. I had just gotten back from another mission.”

“The one with the ‘Viper’ is that correct?”

He has to clear his throat in attempt to fight off the tightness, feeling his chest constrict in pain as he nods. 

“It was a long mission. I hadn’t been away from the chair for that long before and she managed to break through every crack formed. Or at least we thought she did.”

“Have you tried to find her? Since you have come back?” 

“I started trying to find her the second Steve found me.” He explains, thinking back to when he first started tracking her down. But there was nothing, even going through all the programs he could within the Red Rooms files, he couldn’t find a trace of her anywhere after him. 

He was terrified, because if he couldn’t find a single trace of you that might have meant you were gone and he didn’t think he could survive in a world that he knew didn’t have you in it. 

But then Natasha freed the Red Room while he was ‘snapped’ and the world he came back to was a world with the Widows and all their secrets revealed. And that’s when he found Yelena….. Well Yelena had found him. 

She had been suffering from the loss of her sister, and had taken to finding all the widows herself to make sure they were fine. She was the one person in this world that had the information he needed. 

Sam, the new captain america, had poured over the intel with him. Your intel, the trail to find you. 

“You sound as if you have.”

“Not yet, but I’m close.” He nods. “I have this feeling in my chest, that I’m almost there. That I’ve almost got her. And I can give her what she’s always wanted.”

“And what’s that?”

“A candle that smells like orchids by a front door where you can hang your keys. A door mat decorated to invite kids to trick or treat on Halloween. Curtains that catch the light in the morning.” None of the things he mentioned were his dreams, not until she had mentioned them. 

“I hope you get those things.” He does too. And he was close, matter fact he only had 3 more days before Sam and himself went to find you. 

- 

The inland taipan's venom is the most potent of any snake in the world. A single bite contains enough venom to kill around 100 adult humans. The venom is a cocktail of enzymes that paralyze nerve endings, destroy muscle tissue, and cause severe bleeding

- 

A month with the Soldat had been easy keeping to yourself, 2 months had shown you so much more. 

The first being he was extremely grumpy in the mornings, no matter what. Even before you both had begun getting along you had noticed that he hated them. Every move he made was tight, He would rip open the ration packets and stomp his feet just about anywhere. He would do weapons checks so that all you would hear were the clicks and twists of his gun and the metal hand grabbing everything. 

Then he would do bed checks, coming over to the cot you had claimed as your own to throw you off it and search through your stuff. 

Month three, 3 targets in, you had completely learned his morning routine. And since you had been on watch last night you got the gift of seeing it in real time. After a couple of hours of tossing and turning in his sleep and mumbling something about a Steve he sat up right at 5am, launching himself out of his cot and taking in his surroundings. He glared at you, which made you smirk as he passed to head to the bathroom. He stretched in there, too proud to admit that even the Soldat needed to loosen his muscles. You heard the water run telling you he was right on schedule with cleaning himself up and you took the chance to rest your head on the small pillow to close your eyes before he stomps back. 

You know he is reaching for the ration packets without even opening your eyes, and you know he uses his teeth to tear it open in hopes to release some of the tension he had built up. You know he is already snatching your own ration packet to prepare it, moving to start the kettle and prepare the bowls. 

You have another 15 minutes of him checking his weapons, hearing him grunt with every weapon cleaned and polished before making sure they were all strapped into their holsters. The kettle starts ringing and he has the habit of rushing to grab it before it bothered you, and you always thought it was the most human thing to do, like a glimpse into who he would have been if he hadn’t become this monster. 

The smell of cream of wheat fills the air, and you hear his steps come to your cot, right on time. 

In the beginning he used to snatch you up to fling you, now he merely reached out a hand to guide you up without an ounce of aggression before he searched through your stuff. And normally you would go grab the rationed breakfast and get ready but today you chose to head to his own cot, sliding into it. 

You were just tired, and you really didn’t care as he turned to glare at you while you curled up, pretending that you weren’t basking in the smell of the leather and soap he wore, pressing your face into the cloth of the cot. A small ounce of fear fills you when he marches forward, only for him to pull the blanket up and cover your shoulders. 

And the warmth fills your body, black filling your vision as you fall asleep once more, this time in the Soldats bed. 

You wake a little later, eyes snapping around the room to check everything, finding the Soldat sitting over his tech to watch your next target. He snaps his head to you the second you sit up, eyes tracing over you before nodding in contempt and turning back to the task at hand. 

When you stand from the cot to grab your gear you are shocked to find that he had already prepared it for you. 

Not only had the Soldat let you sleep, but he had helped you prepare. 

And that small tug in your chest is a weakness, you know it, but that doesn’t stop you from turning to watch him work. 

If he wasn’t in this life you were sure he would have been a good man. 

You felt bad lying to him,  but you had to because good man or not he was a soldier first. And a good soldier would take you out for your weakness, a good soldier would kill you for what you were doing. 

- 

The worst part of waking up was the fact that you couldn’t escape the dreams and memories even with your eyes open. Most think that it’s over once you wake, but for you? Never. Every move is haunted by the past, every breath another painful punishment, and everywhere you look is just another reminder. There was nowhere you could escape. 

So when you manage to pull yourself from the nightmare, sitting up with your clothes drenched in a cold sweat, the darkness of the closet surrounding you like a blanket of protection. 

You’re not there….You remind yourself. If it’s dark then they are leaving you alone. 

And when you sit up, pain shoots through your hip at every single move, letting yourself out of the closet you begin your routine. 

3 am, a slight shower. Not long in fear you would be caught and in part you didn’t want to run too much water. Brush teeth, dress in suit. 

3:15, limp to the kitchen and start boiling water before you reach into your duffel to grab the pain pills you kept hidden away. The prescription written in your name feels wrong, like aren’t actually yours, like you are living the life of a stranger. But you remind yourself it doesn’t matter anyways as you shove it in your mouth, going back to scarf the cream of wheat down and then you head out for an intel session. 

You never take the door, instead you snatch your duffel and remove a little of the newspaper to slide out and climb down the fire escape. 

You take back roads, your static sounder messing up any footage of yourself the cameras might have caught. And soon enough you were prepping yourself to watch your target, venom sitting in the wrists of your suit, a little bit of that past routine giving you something to focus on. 

20 more names on the list until you would go after the Soldat, 21 more names total. 21 names until you are finished with it all. 

All you had to do was wait for the perfect time to kill this one. 

- 

The bite of the Inland Taipan with envenomation can be rapidly fatal, it can take as early as 30 minutes

- 

The Widow had worn on the Soldat, a shame to admit. 

A routine had built where it shouldn't have and now instead of working around each other they worked with each other. They made the rations together, ate together, cleaned their weapons and reloaded them together. 

When he would sit to watch the intel she began coming to sit with him, if not to watch it herself she would lean her head against him and find something to busy herself with while he worked. 

But the biggest change was the banter. 

Gone were the days of him grunting and glaring, she would refuse that now. Instead they found themselves going back and forth, but it was never serious, mostly teasing. 

She would speak in French to piss him off because she knew the Soldat struggled to keep up with it. He would come out of the shower and lean over where she slept to make the water drip down on her while she tried to sleep. She would trip him as he tried to get dressed and he would pull out strands of hair while she did it. 

Back and forth, push and pull. 

Today, when they were planning to start the intel stage on the next target it had turned out to be a downpour of rain, and normally he would go anyway. And yet, when you went to grab your suit he reached out his flesh hand to stop you, pulling you to sit back down. 

“Today, we rest.” He orders, watching your eyes narrow at the russian before you nod and stand, keeping ahold of his hand as you head to where you both keep the stash of rations. 

This safe house was freezing, and it made him miss the last one, not to mention this safe house only held one cot. The best part about this safe house? 

It had amazing rationing food. 

So when you shook the pack to heat it up he made sure to stay close and start the kettle. Keeping so close that he could always feel your arm against him. 

And once the rations were ready you both huddled together against the counters for cover so you could let your walls down a bit, sitting side by side. You shared your beef and potatoes, he shared his spaghetti, eating out of the portion packs and drinking the tea. But his favorite part about this new routine was when the conversation turned to dreams. 

“If I wasn’t in this program……” You hum, and he can’t help but watch your every movement, the way you lick your hips and scratch your forehead in contemplation. “I would have a big house.” 

He huffs out a laugh, shoving the last of his food in mouth as you shrug. “Yes, a big house. And…… and I would have a candle that smells like orchids so whenever people enter they think it smells nice….. And maybe a rug outside the door so they can see it when the kids trick or treat.”

He can’t help the smile that forms from listening about your dream, grabbing your trash to throw away before cleaning out the mugs you both used. 

“Oh! I’d have kids. At least 7!” You continue, following him before shuffling to tech case to find your camera set up. He knows you’re going to triple check that everything is working to busy yourself, something you often did whenever you brought up the idea of kids. 

Widows couldn’t have kids, this he knew. They all received the procedure. To stop periods, to keep their bodies from transforming too much and too prevent pregnancies whenever Dreykov sent them on seduction missions. And before the Soldat had met you none of that had really mattered to him. 

But now, the thought of you being used like that, it made him furious. And he tried to figure out ways to prevent it, ways to stay attached to you as a mission partner forever. 

But that would never happen, they would never allow that. So he tries not to think about it, instead he moves forward to pull you away from the tech, pulling you to the cot so you both can lay down, pulling the blanket up and wrapping you in his arms. 

“Goodnight,” You whisper in french, and pinches your arm to make you laugh before letting himself fall asleep. \

- 

Bucky had the defense of saying that they had tried knocking first, and that was a lame defense at that. But he thought about his arguments as he picked the lock with ease, pushing the door open and letting Sam take the lead. 

At the last second his flesh hand grabs at the Captain America suit, pulling his friend back to warn him. “A quick heads up, she doesn’t fight like the others.”

“I’ll do my best.”

“No, don’t let her wrap her legs around you and don’t let her knives come into contact, small slash or not they are all laced in venom. And above all avoid getting punctured by any of her weapons.” He explains. 

“I thought we were going in to reason with her.”

“We are.” Bucky sighs, his chest constricting in pain. “She’s just a little lost. We’ve all been there.”

The need for revenge was strong. He had been there himself, Yelena had been there. Many widows have been there. And you were currently handling that yourself, handling all the trauma yourself. And that thought hurt him. 

Sam had agreed to help, to come with him and find you, talk you down from this path Captain America style. 

So they stood together as they pushed the door in, searching every inch of the apartment for you until they realized you weren’t here. So instead they looked around for where you might be. 

“I thought all the Hydra Safe Houses had been torn apart.” Sam mutters, admiring the work you did on the windows, newspaper covering nearly every inch while Bucky moves to the closet where he had seen the bed in their search for you. 

He could imagine you nestled up in the cot, surrounded in the dark. The way you used to pull the covers completely over your head to hide from the sun and use your feet to pull the blanket in so you were fully cocooned. 

But this….. None of this was you. Countless times talking about your dreams and this was the outcome? You deserved better. 

“Everything you told me about her just doesn’t seem right here.” Sam mutters once more moving to the kitchens and digging through the cabinets. “Military rations and tea. That’s all.”

“She was so full of life, used to dream of her freedom. She needs help.” Bucky snaps, anger beginning to course through him as he heads to the kitchen. One of your biggest things when you were paired was hiding the tech when you left so no one would have access. 

Your favorite spot was always the bottom left cabinet and sure enough it all sat there. 

“Brilliant.” Sam smiles, leaning over the laptop as Bucky hacks his way in to see what you have been watching. It takes a moment for the footage to load, and once it does he finds video footage of a man walking around his apartment in a towel. 

“Live feed.” Bucky mumbles. 

“That’s Eaiton,” Sam sighs, leaning forward as the man walks down a hall and heads into what looks to be a master bedroom. The footage follows the movement and when the feed changes to another camera you had hidden Sam whistles. “And that is NOT Eaitons wife.”

“Course not.” Bucky chuckles, pulling out his phone to enter in the address on the intel. “What do you know about him?”

“Nothing much. Was on Congress, just got removed but they didn’t announce it. Kept the whole thing hush hush. Last I talked to Yelena she was looking into his name, it’s why I recognized him so quickly.”

“The address isn’t far off, if we take the back roads we can avoid traffic.” Bucky explains, beginning to lead the way out of the apartment while already dialing on his phone. It rings and rings and rings.  Once the call fails he tries again and again and again. 

Finally it’s picked up, a brash voice filling his ears, out of breath. “Who the fuck keeps calling?!”

“Jared Eaiton, I’m calling to inform you that your life is in danger. I advise you to not hang up.” Bucky starts, watching Sams wings expand so he can take off as he straddles his bike. “I need you to do a couple things for me, starting with having you and the women you are with get dressed as normally as possible. I need you to act natural.”

“Why? For what?”

“Sir, there is a Widow somewhere near your apartment,” He explains, though part of him wants to let you get your revenge he knew you were better than this. You were more than a widow. “Step two, are you ready?”

- 

Inland taipans are generally calm and reclusive, preferring to escape from trouble. However, they will defend themselves and strike if provoked, mishandled, or prevented from escaping

- 

The Soldat moved easily with you, striding side by side as you prepared to take out the target. And normally you loved his proximity, but today it did nothing but give you anxiety. 

Something he seemed to be picking up on. 

Before you could split from him to follow the plan he grabs your elbow slowly, making sure to not trigger the fang puncture on your wrist, pulling you close to press his forehead against yours. “I don’t like this plan.”

“It’s a plan we have done many times.” You try to laugh, giving him your best pretty smile to push him off the track. It only makes it worse. 

“There is something wrong with you today.” He grunts out, keeping you close. “I don’t want to separate.”

“We do this, this is the plan.” You huff, “Don’t stress grumpy man.” 

You lean up on your toes to kiss his cheek, watching his eyes narrow at you a little more, but you smile like nothing is wrong once more. Leaving his arms and heading off. 

You didn’t have time, he had been a little grumpy this morning which meant he will work faster on the mission, and you had two kids to smuggle out before he caught you. 

You had made sure to take the side closest to their room for this mission, climbing up to the second story window and sliding in like a shadow. It takes 5 steps until you are in their room, and your heart expands the second you see them. 

They slept so soundly, looking so peaceful that you knew you were a villain just for having to wake them up. But you do, keeping a hand over their mouths to keep them calm as you order them in english. 

“I need you to listen.” You order, as they both try to move away. “Follow me. Now.” 

The boy jumps to do so, the girl however holds her ground until you get on her level. “Listen to me, you and your brother are in danger here. And unless you want him to be hurt you will follow me.”

And so they do. 

You work quickly, breaking a vase as you pass, spraying a bottle of fake blood to make it look like splatter before you have them hold onto you as you crawl out the same way you entered. 

The Agent you worked with most the time was already standing in the streetlight waiting for you to deliver them. “Go with him, he will keep you safe.”

The boy, once again, does not wait to run and you’re sure he is still half asleep. The girl keeps a firm clutch on your hand, forcing you to kneel as a loud bang sounds out, letting you know the Soldat is nearly done. 

“I need you to go.” You whisper, pushing some of the hair from her face and tracing her cheek with your fingers. “He’ll take care of you ….. I promise.”

She nods, crying, but runs off. 

And you don’t have time, but you watch anyways. The way the agent scoops them up and hugs them close, both their arms wrapped tightly around him. You envy it, and you hate it all in the same go. 

They will never see their parents again, they will never know the safety of their home. After today they are ruined. 

But you could at least make sure they get into the car safely before heading back, out of breath with tears falling down your face. 

You’re so panicked about time that you slip on your way in, slipping in the fake blood and slamming into the broken glass of the vase right as the Soldat comes around the corner in a fury. 

You panic, the rage written on his face makes you think he knows. He must know. This was the end and he would go back and find the kids, This will all be ruined. 

But the second he kneels in front of you the rage disappears, instead he is pulling at your limbs so he can look you over, checking you for any injuries you realize. 

“It’s not my blood.” You try to explain. 

“It is.” He snaps, eyes narrowing as he pulls a piece of glass from your hip. “You’re hurt.”

And when you look down you realize it is in fact some of your blood, since you had fallen on the vase. He pulls you to look back at him, keeping his hand on your jaw. “Let’s go home.”

He doesn’t check for the kids, he merely drags you away. 

- 

The target was acting weird, both him and his prostitute were. You knew better than that, and you refused to let this one slip away today, you were so sick of watching him and his hookers. 

So you grabbed your gear, and went to work. 

Never take the front door, that was the first rule. So you climbed onto the roof of his apartment building, finding the skylight and carving your way in, sliding down on a rope to land on your feet and pull out your knife prematurely. 

Immediately you know something is off, the sharp feeling in your spine makes you feel like there is a predator near. 

A predator you know all too well by the smell of leather. 

You can’t help the hiss that passes your lips as you whirl to find him, kicking out to knock him off his feet as soon as you can. Only he was prepared for that, catching your foot with his metal, pulling you close only to barely dodge the knife you slash at him, his eyes wide. 

You take his shock to your favor, slashing at him again, his metal arm coming up to protect him. The clash rings out and you hiss again, making him grunt out as you distribute the weight. Only to get knocked off your ass by another figure. 

You had been so distracted with your hate for the Soldat that you missed the red white and blue suit.

You waste no time to twist and attack at them, turning feral with the need to kill.  

And then the fight turns 2 against one. Every slash you make is dodged by a metal shield or a metal arm, every kick is met with one of their own, every punch is caught and pushed away. They both track your movements well, easily even. 

You kick the chest of the Captain, sending him reeling back, throwing a knife to trap his sleeve to the ground as you turn back to the Soldat and move to stab the knife down, he catches it between the crook of his metal arm, grunting out to keep you further back. 

“I don’t want to do this.” He grunts out as you push down with the knife, hissing. “You don’t need to do this.”

“Need?” You laugh bitterly. “I want to do this.”

And you almost got it until he kicked out your feet and sent you reeling back. 

You were getting desperate, panicked, and though you knew better than to let yourself get this way you couldn’t help it. So with no true aim you threw the knife, the Soldat catching it with one hand as you charge at him, triggering the fangs as you use his own knee to launch up, your knee pressing on his shoulder with your right hand pulling his hair to expose his neck while he drops the knife. 

Instead of pulling you off his arms come up to catch you, like natural instinct. And you are pathetic because you hesitate, this is your chance to get him and yet you feel tears in your eyes as you can’t even push your hand to get him. 

And then you’re being thrown as something hits your back, air leaving your lungs. 

Pain laces through you as you fly off him, the shield flying back to the Captain while you fall to the ground. 

Not only do you feel the pain in your back but your hip hits the floor and you cry out, struggling to get back to your feet to keep fighting. 

“Hey! Don’t you dare!” The man in the USA suit orders, pointing at you like you are a dog. “Stop.”

You hiss while the Soldat chuckles, wiping some of the blood from his lip. “Listen-”

“Fuck you!” You yell, lunging out to attack but it’s no use as you crumble to the ground, your hip giving out. He’s quick to go to help you, only to be pushed back as you reach to snatch another knife only for his boot to step on it. 

“You used to be better at this.” He huffs out, still breathing heavily as the other one comes closer. 

You want to kill him, to yell at him and hit him. You want to tell him that he’s the reason for all of this. But the tears are falling and your hip is throbbing. 

You’re useless. 

“Kill me.” You snap. “Just do it. Get it over with.”

You watch as his face crumbles, pain lacing his features while his partner takes charge. 

“We are here to help you, that is all.” He starts. “You want revenge, that’s understandable. But there are better ways, I promise you.”

“Better ways?” You hiss out a laugh through the tears. “You’re kidding me.”

“You want to ruin these men, and I understand.” He leans down, and you risk a look to the Soldat, who is watching you with a devastating look, you are forced to turn back to the other to avoid getting sick. “You have information on them, you can testify-”

“What? So they can get out of it?” 

“No, they could serve time in-”

“COULD. They could.”

“Then we get revenge.” It’s the Soldat that says this, his voice tight. “We will, I promise. You work with Sam and I and we will get intel on them all, enough so that they don’t have a chance. But no killing.”

You look back and forth between them, watching as they have a silent conversation between them, before the captain finally nods with a deep sigh. 

Soldat turns back to you, kicking the knife to you gently. “Come on.”

“I can get you a full pardon.” His partner offers. “Full pardon of all crimes within the red room to now. So long as the three of us work together.”

“My entire list?” You sneer, risking a look to the Soldat one more time. 

“Entire list.” He nods, watching you closely. 

And then it clicks for you. You’re trapped here, there is no doubt. But if you could get closer, to trap him in, you could finish your promise to yourself. 

You can kill him. 

So, with a final hiss and tears falling down your face you nod slowly, clutching your hands into fists as you answer with a ‘deal.’

- 

The inland taipan is a specialist hunter of mammals, and its venom is adapted to kill warm-blooded species. The venom acts quickly to kill the prey before they can bite back or escape

- 

The Soldat helps you the entire way, even though you weren’t actually hurt, which you tried to tell him. But the arguments were no use, he would hear none of it, instead he pushed to carry you until you both made it home. 

He hauls you to the bathroom, setting you down to start the water and let it heat up before removing your suit as slowly as possible. Once the suit of off he helps you sit down so the cut is exposed and he can clean it. 

The fact that such a small cut would bother him so much nearly makes you laugh, but it also gives you butterflies, and you wonder if this is how normal people feel. So you lean forward, grabbing his attention. And without thinking you kiss him, your lips meeting his as you melt into him. 

This would change everything, and you know it, but you don’t care. And he didn’t either by the way his arms wrap around you, melting into the kiss just as you had. 

- 

You were going to kill the Soldat, it was something you had promised yourself long ago. In the darkened cell they had kept you in, near dead, the only thing keeping you from giving up was that promise. 

‘I will not leave this earth unless he is gone from it’ 

You would kill him, this was fact, no matter what you had to do. Once you did that you could kill yourself.  This final mission was yours.

-

[danielnelsen]

WHAT A WAY TO FINISH THE TRIAL ACHIEVEMENTS YOOOOOO

[cloudwhisper23]

I'm too lazy to format, so if you want proper formatting on this, I've posted it on Ao3! This is a continuation from the last art trade I did with @pixlokita about their Werebunny Jeremy AU (we've decided to call it Cut Right Through Me)

Below the cut is the link to the story on Ao3, and the full part that I just completed! Fair warning, this is a pretty decent length, roughly 9k words. Enjoy!

“You’re mean, you know that?” Jeremy said irritably as he dropped into the passenger seat.

“I don’t care. He’s dangerous, Jeremy.”

“Dangerous, yet you apparently have been calling him,” Jeremy muttered, slouching in the chair.

“To find you! Speaking of, where were you this week?”

“Around.”

“Not home.” Ramona shot him a glare as she backed out of the driveway. “Which by the way, I went to your house. It’s an absolute mess. And you know how to get bloodstains out of things-“

“I was going to get to it.” Don’t mention Percy, please don’t remind me. Jeremy wished he was back in Michael’s house, still being interrogated for being there. It was much better than the absolute grilling he was getting from his sister.

“You’re lucky I helped clean up,” Ramona sniffed. “And you owe me for Percy’s vet bills, by the way. I know you’re a disaster on a regular basis, but whatever crisis you had will not get you out of your responsibilities mister.”

“Vet bills?” Jeremy echoed, flinching slightly when she mentioned Percy.

“Yeah, I had to take Percy to the vet. Some animal must’ve broken into your house after you ran off or something because he was hiding in your room scared out of his wits and covered in dried blood. He’ll be fine, but honestly. What could’ve been so important that you ran off and left Percy to fend for himself?”

“I didn’t know Percy survived,” Jeremy answered quietly.

“Well, you should’ve checked,” Ramona replied grimly. “He’s only still alive because I went to find you.”

“Yeah…” Jeremy pulled his shirt up over his head to bury the way his eyes were swimming. Everything was just too much for him right now. “Can you just- Can we go back to your house? I don’t think I can go home right now.”

“That’s where we’re headed,” Ramona answered gently. “I’m sorry to yell at you, Jer. I really am. I was just worried.”

“I know…” Jeremy rubbed his face into the soft fabric of the shirt. He wished he could’ve had a chance to apologize or make some kind of effort to befriend Michael before they’d abruptly left. “If it helps, I hardly remember anything from the last few days.”

“I noticed.” Ramona’s hands gripped the steering wheel tightly. “Hey, maybe we could go visit Becky for a bit. I know it’s been a while since I’ve seen her. I’m guessing you haven’t seen her lately either.”

“I can’t,” Jeremy said softly. He didn’t know when he’d transform again, and he couldn’t bear to have it happen around his family, not when he knew that Becky would dig straight for the cause of it, probably making him have to go through it longer than he wanted anyway. He wanted to have something for his friend to work with when he shared the problem.

Or maybe he wanted to handle something himself for once.

“Jer, are you sure? Not to push you or anything, but I’m probably going to head there at the end of the week. I was already planning the trip before you vanished, and now that you’re back-“

“I wouldn’t want to stop you from going,” Jeremy interrupted firmly. “I need to finish up some loose ends around here before I’d go. But if you could take Percy with you, I’d appreciate it.”

Maybe it would be best to just disappear. To be hunted and killed like the monster he was while Ramona was out of town. While she was safe.

“If you’re sure,” Ramona said, sounding hesitant still. “I’ll take Percy with me. I’m sure Becky misses him as much as he probably misses her.”

“Well, he is the son of her old dog. I’d be surprised if she didn’t miss him,” Jeremy answered, finally peeking out of his shirt.

“You’re such a big baby sometimes, Jeremy,” Ramona said softly, shaking his shoulder. “We’ll get you sorted out. Maybe find you a man to help you relieve your stress. You certainly need that-“

“Stop, stop. We’re not having this conversation-“

“If you just tried to have a relationship-“

“I thought you were all about not having a man to rely on for everything,” Jeremy countered.

“Well, I have different biases.”

“You only agreed because Becky said it first,” Jeremy accused, elbowing his sister.

“Hey, no assaulting the driver. Besides, I never said you have to rely on him for everything. Just… some things.”

“I’m less shallow than you,” Jeremy replied, huffing as he returned his gaze to the window.

“Oh, I doubt that. I saw the way you were eying up Michael. You wanted him,” Ramona teased.

“Oh, come on, I’m allowed to think a guy is hot, Mona! And he’s-“

“Just your type. Except I don’t think his personality is right for you. He’s too bitter, too grouchy. Not good enough for my little ball of sunshine.”

“I have four inches on you,” Jeremy argued.

“Not where it counts,” Ramona hummed in reply. “But seriously. I’m going to emphasize this, so pay attention. Don’t you dare go pining after Michael Afton.”

Jeremy rolled his eyes. “I think you already burned that bridge too badly to rebuild.”

“Good. But if there’s still a silver of doubt in your mind, I’m going to update you on everything once we get home. That man has a bloody history.”

“So you’re calling him some kind of monster?” Jeremy scoffed. “Come on, he called you right away when he found me, didn’t he?”

“How do we know it was right away? Maybe he drugs people for kicks and-“

“Just because I don’t remember the last few days does not mean I don’t remember last night. And nothing happened! We didn’t have sex, I promise you.”

“Mhm,” Ramona sounded unconvinced. “If you say so.”

“I’m never going to get you to believe me on any of this stuff, am I?” Jeremy groaned hiding his face as it burned. He shouldn’t be thinking of Michael in that context, especially now. “You’re so mean to me.”

“I love you too, Jeremy.”

Jeremy went to take a nap when he got to his sister’s apartment, crashing immediately on the couch. He needed to fix his sleep for work later that night anyway.

Ramona dragged him away from his nap to give him a bunch of information about the background of Fazbear Entertainment, and the whole reason she was suspicious of Michael. Clearly, she wasn’t done with their earlier conversation. She really doesn’t believe that I’ll leave it alone, Jeremy thought to himself as she dropped a bunch of newspaper clippings into his lap.

“He killed his little brother, Jeremy.”

“Allegedly.” Jeremy’s eyebrows furrowed as he skimmed the newspaper.

“And his father killed a bunch of kids back in 1985. At the same location you’ve been working at.”

“They never proved that,” Jeremy argued. He shoved the paper away, avoiding looking at the image of Evan Afton. The kid gave him an uneasy feeling.

“You can’t deny the evidence. Just because they weren’t convicted of murder doesn’t mean they didn’t kill anyone.”

That’s exactly what that’s supposed to mean, actually. Jeremy’s mouth thinned. He gave the newspapers back to his sister. “Okay, fine. Whatever.”

“Jeremy-“

“Can I please just take a nap in peace?” Jeremy begged. “I don’t need this extra stuff.”

Jeremy was glad to be able to get away again later that day. He knew his sleep was skewed, and he’d probably be exhausted for work, but he didn’t care. That was one thing he could rely on to be consistent. They’d be fine so long as he clocked in on time and clocked out. And if the animatronics caught him off guard, so be it.

He’d missed enough shifts already, and even without his uniform, he’d be fine going into work. Who was going to see him anyway?

He clocked in early, fiddling with his flashlight as he started his patrol. It was considered dumb to do things like this, he knew, but he hadn’t had any issues with walking around during his shift yet. And even if he did, he doubted the animatronics could do much to him anyway, now that he remembered the incident with Toy Bonnie.

The only real question was whether or not that golden bear would come back to kick him out again, but since Jeremy had never seen the bear before that time, he guessed it was a very rare occurrence thing that only happened if an animatronic was hurt or damaged. Then why wouldn’t it be protecting Mangle?

Shaking the weird thought out of his head, Jeremy stepped into Parts and Service, hoping he’d see the glint of his keys somewhere on the floor. Fritz usually forgot to lock up, and Jeremy had taken up the habit of locking up behind him. Since he’d lost his keys the last time he’d been in for a shift, he figured they’d be around somewhere.

He found himself out of luck. Sighing, Jeremy checked that all the old animatronics were still on the floor. Bonnie was still around, and with a twinge of guilt, Jeremy spotted Toy Bonnie’s mangled remains tucked between Bonnie’s torso and his arm. Best not to think too hard about that, Jeremy told himself, turning the beam to the rest of the room.

The faintest rustling noise had Jeremy immediately back on his guard. He turned to see a locker door falling open, revealing a golden suit. His grip on his flashlight tightened as he stared at the golden rabbit costume. It didn’t seem to move much more.

Maybe it was something they used during the day shifts? They were short a Bonnie after all. Still, a golden variation seemed odd as it was on the complete opposite end of the color spectrum from the other two Bonnie models Jeremy had seen.

He was almost tempted to look closer it at, but he knew better than to mess with the animatronics. Especially after his run-in with Toy Bonnie. He did not want to stir up the crazy bear thing again, no thank you.

Shaking his head, Jeremy turned back toward the door. Then he hesitated. The red light on the security camera was blinking at him. Who was in the security office?

Deciding to forget the rest of his early patrol for now, Jeremy made his way back to the office to see a very grumpy Michael shining a flashlight down the hall at him, a small boy also looking at him from a perch on top of the desk.

“Uh… hi?” That’s not Scott, Jeremy’s mind supplied. The realization hit him a moment later as he recognized the boy from Ramona’s newspaper clippings. Evan Afton.

His eyes seemed almost hypnotizing as he glared at Jeremy. “Huh. So you did survive then. Fancy that.”

“I… thanks?” Jeremy finished making his way into the office, weary of the kid on the desk. “Do I know you?”

Evan snorted. “Don’t be stupid. No.”

“Oh. Okay?”

Michael made an impatient noise. “Jeremy, don’t just stand in the doorway like a lost animatronic. Sit down if you’re going to bother me.”

“Right. Sorry.” Jeremy hurriedly went to sit down in the rusty folding chair next to Michael. “How did you know I’d be here?”

“I didn’t. That chair has just been here every shift I’ve worked,” Michael answered, checking through the cameras. “I can’t believe you’re insane enough to do that though.”

“Do what?”

“Go into Parts and Service. Cassidy doesn’t like it when people come in there,” Evan supplied. “Nobody’s supposed to go in there at night.”

“It’s part of my patrol,” Jeremy said defensively.

“You’re insane for doing a patrol in the first place!” Michael exclaimed. “I thought you’d broken in or something, and I was going to handle it, but Evan said that’s Cassidy’s job. Which, you had to be testing her patience with how long you stuck around in there.”

“I feel like I should be worried.”

“You should be.” Evan assessed him as Michael went back to focusing on the cameras. “I thought the rabbit thing killed you, you know.”

“Should I know what you’re talking about?” Jeremy asked, uncomfortable as the ghost boy studied him. He made Jeremy exceedingly uneasy, and he couldn’t describe why.

A helpful thought decided to interject for a moment, thankfully making him feel a little bit safer. Michael couldn’t have killed his brother. Otherwise, why would they be working together like this?

“Yeah.” Evan tossed a crumpled hat into Jeremy’s lap. “This is yours, right?”

Startled, Jeremy scrambled to catch it, seeing the black stains spotting the rim and front of his hat. Because it was his hat, the one he’d been wearing the last time he transformed. Battered and covered in black oil and whatever that other fluid was, his hat was mostly still intact.

“Where did you get this?” Jeremy asked, smoothing it out to shove it back over his head.

Amused, Evan let out another scoff. “Do you even have a brain? I lost half mine, and I can still connect the dots.”

“His sister is much quicker than he is, that’s for sure,” Michael replied before Jeremy could sputter out a reply.

“You guys are mean.” Jeremy crossed his arms with a pout.

“If you’re going to be here, you can check the hallway and the left vent.” Michael tapped his flashlight, ignoring his words.

“Right, yeah okay.” Jeremy shone the beam of his flashlight down the hallway. “So, what? You’ve just been in the pizzeria the entire time?”

“Yeeep,” Evan answered, leaning across the desk to change the camera and wind the music box. “Most don’t usually live to see the sunrise after they’ve seen me though.”

“Lucky them,” Michael muttered, pulling the camera monitor out of his brother’s reach. “You’re insufferable.”

“And you’re a big grouch,” Evan retorted. He peered into the left vent. “Eugh, that stupid balloon kid is here. Scram!” His shout made whatever was in the vent squeal and scramble away.

Jeremy blinked. “So the animatronics are just scared of you?”

“Not all of them.” Evan answered with a meaningful look at the camera. “Just the insignificant ones.”

“Which translates to, all of them except the Puppet,” Michael added.

“I don’t scare Cassidy.”

“Cassidy’s not an animatronic, Evan.”

“I suppose that’s true.” Evan sighed. “She hates me.”

“I still doubt that.” Michael clicked to the Parts and Service camera, frowning. “You didn’t touch anything while you were back there, did you?”

“Not a thing. I was hoping to find my keys, but-“ Jeremy yelped as Evan tossed a set of keys at him. His flashlight crashed to the ground as he scrambled to catch them before they hit him. “Oh. Thanks, I guess?”

“You’re welcome.” Evan peered at the camera his brother was looking at. “You’re sure you didn’t touch anything?”

“I didn’t!” Jeremy protested, even as both brothers looked at him suspiciously. “I was tempted to touch the yellow rabbit guy when he fell out of that locker, but I didn’t, I promise.”

“Yellow rabbit?” Evan’s eyebrows scrunched. “I’ll be right back.”

Michael seemed worried too, his own mouth tightening into a thin line.

“What’s the deal with the… yellow rabbit?” Jeremy ventured to ask.

“Don’t worry about it I’m guessing you must not have seen him the night he was in here. Were you attacked by Toy Bonnie or something?”

“Uh, yeah.” Jeremy chuckled nervously, his spine prickling as he realized that they were probably talking about him. “But I can’t say I’ve seen any yellow rabbits before today.”

“Weird. Evan said he and Cassidy scared it off the last time.” Michael frowned deeper. “It crammed itself into a locker?”

“Well, I don’t know about that. But it was in a locker. I thought it was an animatronic though.”

“It is,” Michael supplied stiffly. “But it’s harmless. It shouldn’t be able to move at all.

“…” Jeremy opened his mouth to ask another question, but he didn’t know how to phrase it.

“Don’t worry about it, okay? Evan’s got it handled,” Michael replied sharply. “Just keep checking the vents.”

“Right, got it.” Jeremy retrieved his flashlight. “You seem to have a bad experience with it.”

“I guess you could say that,” Michael answered shortly. “And you really never saw it when Toy Bonnie attacked you?”

“Uh, nope. I remember working on my shift and then waking up naked in your house. That’s… about it…” Jeremy lied awkwardly.

“Hmm…” Michael didn’t seem too sure about that, but he let it go. “So you didn’t see the giant golden bunny in my house either?”

“Nope!” Jeremy scratched his neck nervously. “Do you think it was the same one Evan was worried about?”

“Can’t be,” Michael replied. “The one I saw was a literal rabbit. This one is animatronic. There’s no way those two are the same thing.”

“I suppose not.” Jeremy shrugged, regretting holding up this conversation. “You seem… less grouchy than earlier.”

Michael turned to Jeremy wearily. “I had a rough morning.”

“Yeah, no, I get that. I just… I wanted to apologize for my sister’s behavior this morning.” Jeremy cleared his throat. “And um. I was wondering if, like, there was a way to sort things out?”

“Oh, you mean about borrowing my clothes? Don’t even sweat it, I don’t need them back.” Michael returned his focus to his work.

“I know Ramona can be awful sometimes-“

“I don’t care about that, Jeremy.” Michael finally gave him proper eye contact, shooting a jolt up Jeremy’s spine. Damn, that was hot. “I don’t care that your sister thinks I’m a killer, or that she thinks my father is also a killer. I couldn’t care less, because she’s right.”

“Oh.” Jeremy shifted uncomfortably, surprised. “Who did you…?”

“Evan. My baby brother.” Michael turned away again, his voice leaving no room to continue the conversation. Jeremy struggled to find a way to resume it, but he couldn’t.

It was all too comforting when Evan reappeared to confirm that Jeremy hadn’t touched the suit.

“Cassidy can’t figure out why it would have moved,” Evan said, peering at the camera suspiciously. “Music box.”

“Stop telling me what to do,” Michael grumbled, but he wound the music box.

“Hey, so how did you die?” Jeremy asked, even though he knew the answer.

Evan raised a surprised eyebrow at him. “That’s such a brash question to ask a nine-year-old.”

“Yeah, but depending on how long you’ve been dead, technically you aren’t nine anymore.”

“Leave him alone,” Michael growled.

“You don’t need to coddle me, Mikey.” Evan rolled his eyes. “What year is it?”

“1987,” Jeremy supplied, pretending to be less afraid of the way Michael was glaring at him. He checked the hallway with his vent to try to divert attention. “It is November.”

“So I’ve been dead for like four years then. My dad killed me.”

“He did?” Jeremy raised an eyebrow at Michael, who scowled.

“He’s lying to you. I was the one who killed him.”

“The accident was an accident,” Evan argued. “You’re not a murderer, Mike.”

“I’m close enough to one,” he shot back.

“So wait, why would you say your father killed you?”

“Because he did.” Evan crossed his legs and peered at Jeremy. “I see why the others like you so much.”

“Uh, thanks?”

“You’re so…” Evan snapped his fingers, trying to think of the word. “Honest. Genuine. Something like that.”

“Candid, maybe?” Jeremy offered.

Michael made an irritated noise as Evan brightened. “That’s the word! Yeah, you’re just so candid and blunt about everything. It’s refreshing. No handholding or coddling.”

“I don’t coddle you more than you try to coddle me,” Michael grumbled.

“Anyway,” Evan shot a pointed look at his brother. “What actually happened was Mikey tried to play a prank on me regarding Fredbear. One of the animatronics of the original diner.” When Jeremy looked confused, Evan elaborated. “The first place wasn’t Freddy’s. Our father and Uncle Henry opened the business as Fredbear’s Family Diner. There were two original animatronics. Fredbear and Spring Bonnie.”

Michael made an impatient noise. “I stuck him in Fredbear’s mouth, and the bloody bear bit down on his head. It was my fault.”

“Your fault I was in the hospital, but not your fault I died,” Evan countered. “Michael was all about apologizing, promising to be a better brother if I just woke up. But when Father came to visit, he told me that this attention-seeking was ridiculous, that I should just open my eyes so the bad press would go away.”

Evan’s tone grew quieter, and even Michael paused, his expression softening. “He said that if I didn’t get up, I didn’t deserve to live. And then I was in the suit, with only Fredbear to keep me company.”

That’s the golden bear then, Jeremy thought. “So, your father is your killer?”

“Not just mine. All the missing kids too.” Evan shrugged. “We’d tear him to pieces if we could find him, but there’s only so many hours ghosts are awake.”

“Presumably only during this shift,” Michael added. “I don’t think Phil ever mentioned the haunted animatronics, and Ramona only mentioned rumors about them.”

Evan and Michael both didn’t seem very inclined to speak much after that. Michael did try to stop him when he went for his next patrol, but he didn’t care too much. The patrol was something he’d always done, and just because he was sharing a shift with someone in the office now didn’t mean he was going to stop doing it. It just gave him a longer time limit.

Maybe at some point he could ask about this mysterious ‘Cassidy’ that Evan kept mentioning. But for now, he checked corners and looked in the camera blind spots, knowing that most didn’t ever bother to check. Toy Freddy and Toy Chica didn’t seem too interested in leaving the stage tonight, which Jeremy was grateful for. The Puppet was sealed away, the music box wound tightly to keep the music playing.

And he remembered Evan’s words about Cassidy preferring to have people stay out of Parts and Service. Instead of entering the room, he just whispered at the door, “I’m trusting you to have everything handled in there Cassidy.”

A cold feeling enveloped him, and he shuddered as he walked away. It was weird to miss Mangle on a shift, but he supposed they wouldn’t come around while Evan was guarding the office. He checked the back door quickly to ensure it was locked and was glad to find that Michael had indeed locked it behind him.

“I wish I could complain about the job you’re doing here, but it seems to be fantastic,” Jeremy said with a sigh as he plopped back into his chair.

Michael raised an eyebrow at that, the constant frown relenting slightly. “Yeah?”

“Yeah. Got the door locked and everything. Better than Fritz does, anyway.”

“Door was already locked when I got here,” Michael said. “But I’ll take the compliment.”

Huh. Interesting. Jeremy was curious about Michael’s sense of humor though, so he poked a little more. “Of course, I can’t really give you all the credit, since it seems that Evan and Cassidy are the ones who are actually in charge around here. They just tolerate you.”

Evan snorted at that, covering his mouth as Michael’s expression returned to a scowl. “I don’t know that you can say you’ve been doing much either, Jeremy.”

“I’m not claiming to. But the animatronics like me, according to Evan, so I have a one-up on you.”

Michael shook his head, but he didn’t rise to the bait.

The rest of the night passed in somewhat stiff silence.

“See you tomorrow night, I guess. Fitzgerald.” Michael rose, offering a hand for Jeremy to shake.

“Same to you, dude.” Jeremy shook his hand cheerily, trying not to visibly wince as Michael crushed his hand in the shake. “Until next time, Afton-“

As soon as he started to say the last word, Michael shoved him back against the wall, covering his mouth. A thrill ran through Jeremy as pain shot up his back. He couldn’t help a startled whimper as Michael glared at him with icy blue eyes.

“Never call me that. Understand? Never.”

“I… I understand! Yep! Never going to call you that ever again, never ever!” Jeremy chirped back, knowing his enthusiasm was way more than the situation required.

“It’s Schmidt. Michael Schmidt.”

“Then… I’ll see you tonight, Schmidt.”

Michael rolled his eyes, pulling a stick of gum from his pocket to start chewing it before he walked out of the security office. Evan had disappeared somewhere around 5, so Jeremy remained to tidy up a tiny bit before walking out to his car.

Michael was still on the sidewalk, presumably going to walk home, and Jeremy did not accept that he was just going to be walking in the chilly air in only his work uniform. He drove alongside Michael, rolling down his window. “Need a ride home?”

“No.” Michael kept walking, not even glancing at the car. “I’m used to walking everywhere.”

“You could catch a cold!” Jeremy protested.

“Good thing I’m not the only one on shift then,” he shot back, blowing a bubble with his gum. “Go home, Fitzgerald.”

“Alright fine. But if you get sick, I’m going to say ‘I told you so.’”

“I’m so terrified of the threat,” Michael replied sarcastically. “Goodbye.”

Rude, Jeremy thought with mild annoyance. But this was progress from last time! Last time, Michael hadn’t had much to say except “fuck off,” so at least Jeremy got through it this time without that. And he’d also gotten information that Ramona hadn’t had, which meant she was wrong about Michael Afton.

“So ghosts are real?” Ramona pressed as Jeremy hung up the phone after receiving a call from his friend Sebastian.

He was so lucky Seb was willing to give him a discount, so lucky he was willing to do repairs without questioning things. Jeremy had already gotten rid of the couch and burned his old sheets. The last step to making the whole rabbit nightmare a forgotten memory was the torn flooring.

“Yeah. And Evan has a much better sense of humor than his brother.” Jeremy shot his sister a skeptical look. “You’re not surprised by anything else I said?”

“Like what? The kid forgiving his older brother? You said he was like nine?”

Jeremy didn’t know how to respond to that. She wasn’t wrong. But it didn’t feel like she was completely right either. “But-“

“Jer, you’re being dumb about all this. You need to think with your brain at least some of the time.”

“I am using my brain! I was asking all the questions I needed answers to.”

“Yeah? Then why are you still so blatantly defending Michael Afton?”

Because if he’s a monster, then so am I, Jeremy thought to himself, but he didn’t say it out loud. “Forget it.”

“Jeremy-“

“No, it’s not worth arguing about. But Evan gave me back my keys.” Jeremy stood up moodily. “It was nice talking with you, Ramona, but I gotta get some sleep before tonight’s shift.”

“Jer, what’s bothering you? You know you can tell me about it, right?” Ramona pressed.

“I know. I just don’t feel like getting into it right now. That’s all. Have a good day, Mona.”

“You too, Jer.” Ramona hesitated for another moment. “I’m here for you, if you need anything.”

“I know.”

Ramona shot him a worried look as she got through the door, careful to avoid catching her pants on the splintered wood that Sebastian was going to replace.

After his sister left, Jeremy stripped, unsure of what triggered him to turn into the rabbit. He didn’t want to ruin clothes that didn’t belong to him though, so he wasn’t taking chances as he went to rest properly for the first time in ages.

Michael let himself back into his house with a heavy sigh. That shift had been long. He undid his tie, ignoring the impatient meowing at his feet while he changed out of his work clothes. “Give me some time, Logan.”

Logan meowed again, pawing at his empty bowl.

“One second, Logan.” Michael pulled a new shirt over his head before giving the cat a scratch behind his ear. “I’ll get that bowl filled in no time.”

After feeding Logan, Michael was tempted to go out and look for the bunny again. Surely it couldn’t have gone far, right? Even if it had been gone for a day, maybe it was just hungry and hunting. Maybe it had tried to return while Michael was gone and couldn’t get back in. Maybe-

You’re overthinking this. God, you are such a freak Michael. Michael shook his head, walking toward the place where he’d last seen the rabbit. Maybe the dumpster was its home?

His hopefulness diminished as he approached the dumpster. He couldn’t see any sign of it anyway. Shoulders slumping, he prepared to walk back, so he could let Logan have his own walk.

A soft thumb behind him made him hesitate though. Michael turned, excitement growing as he saw the giant shape of the golden rabbit who’d appeared very suddenly. “There you are!” Michael exclaimed, beaming as he reached out for the bunny.

His new friend nuzzled into his hand immediately, rubbing its fluffy face against his hand. “I missed you buddy,” Michael whispered into the overwhelmingly soft fur.

A soft rumble in the bunny’s throat soothed him, making all the irritation and torment from the last day completely vanishing. “You can’t just disappear on me, you know,” Michael said, trying for a scolding tone.

The bunny thumped his back foot as a reply.

“What? Are you going to say you didn’t miss me? Because I think you’d be lying.”

The bunny nosed at his neck. A soft, wet feeling made Michael’s neck prickle in the cold.

“Is that a way of saying you did miss me?” Michael asked, scratching up behind the rabbit’s ear.

He stumbled a bit as the rabbit rocked forward, knocking him off-balance a little bit. The rabbit kept nuzzling him until he was completely knocked to the ground. Startled, he didn’t even attempt to get up before he was completely enveloped in soft, warm, golden fur.

“Hey, hang on a sec-“ Michael tried to protest before the bunny squished its head down over his, keeping him even more safely enveloped in warmth. “I need to let Logan out for a bit! You’re going to make it so a poor little kitty can’t stretch his legs, is that what you want?”

A grumbling noise resonated in the back of the bunny’s throat, but it let Michael get to his feet. “Thank you.”

Michael walked back, knowing that the bunny was going to follow him back this time. He didn’t even need to stress about it. Michael grabbed his mail from the box on his way back into the house, tossing the pile onto his table before shaking the harness to get Logan to come running.

“Time for your walk, you crazy cat,” Michael said, pretending to ignore the rabbit who’d opted to lurk on the front lawn instead of coming in this time. Maybe it likes to be free to roam, he thought to himself.

Logan was happy enough to take his walk, purring as they returned. Shortly after Michael walked through the door and started undoing Logan’s harness, the rabbit wriggled into the house, looming behind Michael.

After he’d shut the door, Michael let out a big yawn, rubbing his eyes briefly. Gotta check the mail first, he scolded himself as he yawned again.

Glancing at the top of the stack, Michael felt himself pale. It was another letter from his father, this time marked as urgent. He hadn’t even opened the last one, and now he was getting another? Michael was just grateful his father didn’t know his phone number, but then actual horror struck him. He could just come to my house.

Michael twitched, grabbing the letter so tightly the edges crinkled. With a solid grip, he ripped the envelope and the contents in half. The rabbit flinched, clearly not expecting such a violent action. Logan was unaffected, as usual.

He tossed the torn remains into his trash bin and stalked to his bedroom, trying so hard not to start trembling or crying. The bunny nudged the door open and sniffed at the edge of his bed. Michael patted the side of his bed, giving it permission to jump up. The bunny took the permission easily, pressing comforting warmth into Michael’s back as tears leaked from the corners of his eyes.

“Why can’t he just leave me alone?” Michael sobbed quietly. “It’s bad enough knowing that I did something monstrous, but he does it on purpose. I bet he’s out there doing it to some other poor kids now, and I’m just not strong enough to stand up to him.”

The bunny rumbled out a growl at the blame Michael placed on himself, but it still soothed his pain with soft fur. He rolled over and buried his face properly into the fur, his fingers tangling into the strands. So soft, he thought to himself, tears dampening the fur of the bunny’s chest.

Not that it seemed to mind, pulling Michael closer as he started drifting off to sleep. “I just don’t get it…” Michael trailed off, finally relaxing enough to let go of consciousness.

Jeremy woke up with his arms wrapped around a sleeping Michael. Why am I not surprised? he thought to himself, carefully untangling himself from his sleeping coworker. He’d kill me if he knew I was here.

Unease sank into Jeremy as he realized he was yet again left to try to sneak out without clothing. But at least he was in Michael’s room this time, and he could just grab clothes without getting caught.

His foot hit something soft and warm, and a disgruntled meow made Jeremy realize the cat was also here. Oh shit. Directing a glare at the cat, Jeremy climbed out of the bed without causing the cat or Michael to wake up completely. The black cat nestled back into his paws, purring loudly as Jeremy snuck a new pair of clothing out of Michael’s drawer.

He left quickly, pushing open a window and crawling out of it, ignoring the pain that shot through his feet as he landed on rocks. Jeremy glanced around before hurrying toward his house, memorizing the address as he left the place.

He felt bad for ditching, but he also knew he could not just stay after all that. Not after how upset Michael had seemed the first time. Until he could control when he turned into a rabbit and maybe stay as a rabbit when around Michael, then he wasn’t taking any chances.

Back home, Jeremy slipped socks onto his feet and glanced at the time. He had plenty of time to spare before work, but he still couldn’t help but feel a bit antsy. I’m not supposed to know where he lives, Jeremy thought glumly.

The phone ringing pulled Jeremy away from spiraling in his obsession. Maybe Ramona was right about all that stuff anyway. “Hello? Jeremy Fitzgerald here.”

“Jeremy! What a pleasant surprise to hear your voice. No offense, but we all thought you were dead!”

“Yeah, that’s what Michael told me,” Jeremy chuckled nervously, wondering why Lloyd was calling him.

“Hey, you’re not too opposed to just sharing that shift with him, right? I mean, I know you said you absolutely did not want to have to deal with kids, and I completely understand. Michael had the same qualms about the shift, but this is the only shift where no one is stuck hanging around children. But you’re all good with that? You’re fine sharing the workload? It's probably better anyway, having two people check on the place during those hours. Keeps the place safer- I mean, more secure!” Lloyd blabbed on, talking so fast Jeremy could barely keep up with what he was saying.

“I’m okay with it. Is he?” Jeremy leaned back against the wall, a finger hooked absently into the phone cord. An excuse to spend more time with Michael? No way was he turning that down.

“Oh! Yeah, uh, he actually seemed more than happy to have someone else there. I guess he doesn’t have the same familiarity you have with the job yet. He’s probably a bit jittery about the atmosphere. You know, he’s never had a nighttime security job before, actually.”

“Lloyd, is that all you needed from me, or is there something else?”

“Oh, that’s it. Uh, except one thing. We found a bunch of the torn remains of your uniform. Did you want a new one? I’m guessing that you’ve been using the spare, but you should really have more than one.”

“By that logic, I should have at least three,” Jeremy pointed out. “In case one is misplaced or ruined, or another incident like the other night happens.”

“Can I ask what happened?”

“Toy Bonnie came after me. I don’t really remember what happened after that,” Jeremy replied swiftly. “I don’t need to fill out an incident report or anything do I? I mean, as far as I’m aware, no one got hurt.”

“Nobody was hurt in the incident. We didn’t actually know that until just now actually.” Lloyd laughed nervously. “No, we don’t need anything from you, don’t worry! It just would’ve helped us if you’d remembered something about Toy Bonnie attacking, or maybe Fritz coming in-“

“I don’t know anything about that, sorry.” Jeremy cleared his throat awkwardly. “But I can be in in a couple minutes if you have extra uniforms ready.”

“Oh! Yeah, I can totally do that. Yeah, if you come in before 6, I can totally get you set up with some new uniforms.”

“Great, I’ll see you at 5 then.”

“Fantastic!”

Jeremy hung up the phone feeling more awkward than ever before. At least he’d have a uniform again.

When he saw Michael at the next shift, he set out by tipping his hat at the other man. No response. Evan seemed a bit distracted today as well, somewhat of a frown crossing his face.

Jeremy sat down awkwardly in his chair, remembering Lloyd’s words from earlier. If he had to guess, maybe Michael had been relieved to have an excuse to make sure Jeremy wasn’t in any danger after all the personal risks he took at work.

“I’m going to do a patrol,” he announced abruptly, picking up his flashlight.

“Don’t die,” Evan said, peering over Michael’s shoulder.

“Right…” Jeremy looked at Michael hopefully, but the other man gave him no indication that he was going to say anything in reply.

The night was somewhat quiet. It was weird having the toy animatronics remaining onstage every night, and Jeremy almost wished they’d move so he could at least know that Toy Bonnie hadn’t been a fluke. Even Mangle hadn’t sought him out since he’d turned, presumably too afraid of him now to approach.

It made sense, considering how Percy was taking the exact same approach with him, but it still stung to know that his dog and his favorite animatronic no longer seemed to see him as a safe person. Even Evan didn’t trust him in that form, if Jeremy’s memory served correctly.

Nobody saw him as more than a monster aside from Michael. Was that why he was so magnetized to the other man? Physical attributes aside, Michael seemed well-guarded, not trusting other people. But he seemed to have a secret affection for animals. Even with the amount he swore at his cat, he seemed to love the cat enough to care for it when he was not in the mood to care for the poor thing.

Sighing, Jeremy started to head back toward the cold atmosphere of the main office. He stopped upon hearing what sounded like sobbing coming from Parts and Service.

“Hey, everything okay in there?” Jeremy asked, hoping for a gentle tone.

“No!” The door flew open, nearly hitting Jeremy in the face, and he couldn’t help but flinch at the small girl glowering at him with thick black tear streaks running down her face. “He’s come back, and I can’t stop him!”

“Who came back?” Jeremy asked, crouching down to her level. “Sorry for asking, but I seem to be a bit out of the loop.”

“You take things more seriously than most,” she huffed. Then she blinked at him. “Wait, you’re that security guard guy. We all thought you died!”

“That seems to be the common consensus,” Jeremy sighed. “But who came back? Clearly he’s no one good if you are unhappy about it.”

“No. He killed me, and he’s gonna kill more kids.”

“Oh.” A prickle of fear made Jeremy tremble a bit at that. “When did he come back?”

“Not too long ago. We didn’t notice the changes in his suit, but-“ she glanced at the darkened area for a moment. “Here, I’ll just show you.”

Cold fingers wrapped around Jeremy’s wrist, and he was startled to discover that apparently ghosts could in fact touch people.

“So, originally, he was in that locker there, right?” the girl gestured at the locker Jeremy had originally spotted the animatronic at.

“Yeah…”

“Well, he’s not anymore. Now he’s on the floor over here,” Cassidy pointed directly at where the golden bunny suit was slumped next to the old Freddy model.

“Oh. And this suit’s not possessed right? Nobody should be moving it?”

“No one should be moving it. Employees can get fired for touching it, much less moving it. And I haven’t seen it move on its own.”

“Ghosts can only do things at this time of night…” Jeremy trailed off thoughtfully. “You think it’s the same guy who killed you?”

“I know it is. I had to ask a bunch of times to get anywhere with Evan. That kid is so tight-lipped, I swear.” The girl shook her head. “But apparently, this suit here can only be activated by a key. One person had that key.”

“Your killer.”

“William Afton,” she confirmed. “At least, that’s what Evan says, but he’s been wrong about so much lately, that I’m just worried he’s wrong about that too.”

“Did you try asking Michael?”

“Evan doesn’t think I should talk to the security guards.” The girl shrugged. “He thinks I’ll just kill you guys. But I’m not that murderous. I still have a brain, unlike some people.”

“So you must be Cassidy?”

“Yep.” Cassidy sighed. “I mean, I don’t want to complain because it makes sense that Evan wants to spend time with his brother, but I miss being able to roam the pizzeria freely. Ever since Toy Bonnie got dinged, I’ve been checking in here to make sure Spring Bonnie hasn’t been used. I think we scared him off pretty well though.”

“Spring Bonnie…?”

“The yellow rabbit suit,” Cassidy pointed, rolling her eyes. “Oh! One more thing. I know you’re like, nocturnal or whatever like we are. But you can actually wake up during the day. Could you like, keep an eye out for someone wearing the suit?”

“I mean, I suppose. Did Evan bring that up to Michael?”

“I doubt it. He hates the idea of getting you guys involved.” Cassidy wrinkled her nose. “Something about trying not to cause more deaths than necessary, but he’s not going to kill an adult out in the open like that. I think it’s fine.”

“Huh. Okay. I mean, I can try…”

“Whatever works.” Cassidy seemed satisfied, finally noticing the red light on in the camera. “Oh! Say cheese!”

“That’s a live feed, Cassidy. It’s not a picture camera.”

“You’re no fun.” Cassidy stuck her tongue out at him. “Bye bye for now. I’ll expect results later.”

“I hope I’ll have results for you.”

“That’s the spirit!” Cassidy said cheerfully before disappearing.

Resigning himself to the blinking light of the security camera, Jeremy went back to the office. If he hadn’t been sure before, Evan’s scowl told him plenty about what he needed to know.

“What were you thinking?” Evan hissed, his eyes so dark there was absolutely no color aside from the darkest of dark pits.

“Uhh…”

“She could’ve killed you!”

“She dragged me in there!” Jeremy said in protest.

“Did she now? Maybe she’s just lonely because she lost her best friend.” Michael shot a pointed look at his brother.

“Cassidy can’t stand me,” Evan scoffed, but he let up on Jeremy a little bit. “What did she want?”

“Help with her little investigation into Spring Bonnie.” Jeremy dropped into his chair and peered at the camera monitor in Michael’s hands. “Still no animatronic movement, huh? Almost like they were told to stay put.”

He raised an eyebrow at Evan. The kid rolled his eyes, the frown not relenting. “Toys aren’t our thing. We watch over the others.”

“So the toys not moving is also suspicious behavior?” Jeremy asked. “Hey, not to be dumb or anything, but how much did your dad work with the animatronics?”

“He helped create them, so a pretty significant amount,” Michael answered. “Evan, I just think you should make up with her.”

“There’s nothing to make up! She doesn’t want anything to do with me, and that’s fine. I’ll stay out of her space, and she can take care of the others!”

“She said you told her to stay in Parts and Service,” Jeremy said.

“You’re going to believe her over me? Mikey, you can’t believe this, surely!”

“I mean, I don’t know what to believe. I’ve never spoken to Cassidy before, and if its your word or Jeremy’s, then I’ll take your word for it. But I do still think you should try to resolve this conflict you have with her-“

“Think what you want then! I don’t care!” Evan’s eyes flashed before he abruptly vanished.

Jeremy sat in stunned silence as Michael just continued checking things. “Well that was…”

“He’s just pouting. We’ve had this argument before, don’t worry.” Michael didn’t glance over at Jeremy as he talked. “So, Cassidy let you off with a warning or something I’m guessing?”

“I already said she dragged me in. She wants me to go in during the day and look out for a guy in a rabbit costume.”

“That could only be one person, you know,” Michael said grimly, sitting back to start giving Jeremy his attention. “My father only made one key for that suit.”

“Cassidy said that. She also seems a bit weary of taking information from Evan since he seems a little…”

“Mixed up?” Michael shrugged. “Yeah, don’t put too much stock in what he says. I don’t think he fully knows where he’s at.”

“That’s fair, I guess…” Jeremy wasn’t fully appreciative of that response. “So, you still think your dad killed those kids?”

“Without a doubt. He was always a bit more bitter when he had to deal with them, and if the other kids say it was the golden bunny man, then who am I to say they’re wrong? It makes sense.” Michael shook his head. “I still don’t understand what kind of monster could willingly decide that kids couldn’t get to live their lives though.”

“A kind that’s actually a monster as opposed to someone who thinks of himself as one?” Jeremy offered.

Michael turned his gaze on Jeremy lazily. “I know what you’re trying to do.”

“Is it working?”

“Not more than Evan’s assurances. Listen, I made my peace with what I did a long time ago.”

“It doesn’t seem like it.” Jeremy laid a reassuring hand on Michael’s arm. “You didn’t mean it. There’s no way you and your dad are even remotely in the same league-“

“Yeah, but a monster is a monster, aren’t they? Killers are monsters, Jeremy. Simple as that.” Michael slipped his hand away and went back to the cameras. “It’s not like it’s possible to always spot a monster on the surface anyway. Maybe you’re just telling yourself I can’t be a monster because I don’t look like one.”

Jeremy stiffened at that. You don’t have to look like a monster to be a monster. Did that mean the opposite was true too? He wanted desperately to know the answer.

Michael tried to give him a smile. “Look, it’s no big deal, really. If you aren’t actively saying I’m following in my father’s footsteps, then I think things are okay, you know? Like, I may not really like you, but I don’t think you’re a complete twat.”

“Uh, thanks?” Jeremy didn’t know how to respond to that, instead shining his light into the vent to avoid the heat that rose to his face at what he was guessing was meant to be a compliment.

“Anytime.” Michael chuckled softly. “Looks like he’s going for a full night sulk tonight. Guess it’s just us now.”

“Think you’ll be able to handle the office once I go on my next patrol?” Jeremy asked teasingly.

Michael snorted. “With the animatronics the way they are? I’ll be more than fine.”

“Good to know.”

A few nights passed like this, Michael offering minimal conversation during the shift, Jeremy taking his time to do patrols and update Cassidy on what he saw during the days.

It wasn’t much more than he had during the night, but Cassidy seemed to appreciate it nonetheless. And if he showed up to work tired, then that was fine too. Michael would shake his head, and Evan was still pouting about his argument with Cassidy, so he didn’t care.

Still, he felt a little bit bad whenever he realized he’d nodded off, insisting that Michael wake him. And evidently, that was not happening every time it happened. It hadn’t hurt anything so far though, so Jeremy was willing to let it slide.

It had taken him ages, quietly arguing with Evan while Jeremy slumped in his chair, to convince his brother to try and work things out with Cassidy. Evan had been furious that Cassidy was putting Jeremy in harm’s way, but Michael thought he probably knew the risks of what he was getting into.

Why should Cassidy get the blame anyway? She wanted help, not to doom another man to die. And Evan had given plenty of warning, so Jeremy could’ve backed out whenever he wanted to, so it was fine. There was simply no need to keep blaming Cassidy.

Michael spared a glance away from his constant checking to look at the uncomfortable way Jeremy had passed out in his chair, drool leaking from the corner of his mouth, hat knocked askew. On impulse, he reached over and fixed Jeremy’s hat, before deciding to move him to the floor.

Jeremy’s head knocked into Michael’s chest, and he felt sure that the man would wake. Jeremy hardly stirred, so Michael continued to lay him down, removing Jeremy’s jacket to tuck it beneath his head like a pillow. There, Michael thought to himself, somewhat satisfied before he went back to flick through the cameras absently.

Unfortunately for Mike, however, he’d missed the sound of an animatronic crawling into the vent, too focused on making sure he didn’t wake up Jeremy to pay much attention to the world around him.

The loud static did eventually catch Michael’s attention, and he set the monitor down, forgetting to wind the music box as he glanced at the phone. It was in its cradle, and belatedly Michael realized that noise meant animatronic, and he turned to check the vent just as Mangle swung down to attack.

Michael yowled in pain as the impact knocked him from his chair and plastic teeth tore through his face. The edge of the desk caught the other side of his face, making his vision blurry as he faintly caught the sound of tearing fabric and an angry growl.

Something warm ran down his face as the animatronic screeched, hiding away from the giant shadow looming over Michael. Struggling to push himself upright, he found himself surrounded by golden fur. Oh. Michael blinked blood out of his eye, struggling to process the scene around him, only slightly frightened now that he knew his rabbit friend had somehow appeared to aid him. I hope it doesn’t step on my coworker. That’d be awkward to explain.

“Mikey!” Evan’s voice echoed in the quiet environment. “Michael?”

The bunny was growling, a low rumble vibrating through its body. Cool hands cupped both sides of Michael’s face as Evan’s face came into view.

“Oh my god,” Evan breathed, smudging the blood stream ever so slightly. “Where did Jeremy go? I thought you knew what you were doing!”

“Glad you’ve got your priorities in order,” Michael answered slowly, still struggling to focus on his brother’s face. “Your hands are cold.”

“Of course they are.” Evan huffed in exasperation. “Wait, you’re totally in shock. Mikey…”

“The music box…” Michael trailed off as he registered that a completely quiet room was not a good thing.

Evan’s eye widened. “Oh no.”

The sound of aggressive music echoed in the halls as the Puppet made its approach. Not that it was much of a problem, seeing as Michael’s bunny pinned the animatronic to the ground before it could do much.

“Wait, don’t do that,” Evan said hurriedly. “Uh, I need to-“

“Yeah, no, go ahead.” Michael’s eyelids fluttered shut as Evan went away to shout at the bunny who was currently having a very intense stare down with the Puppet.

Jeremy hadn’t known he’d fallen asleep on shift that night. Waking up tangled in bindings made of shimmery thread had not been the most reassuring thing. More startling than that, however, was the pooling blood around Michael’s head as Evan argued with an unfamiliar girl.

Cautiously he untangled himself and dug into the duffel bag he started to bring to every shift, grateful for his planning as the remains of his uniform remained littered across the floor. The bickering children didn’t notice as he slipped his uniform on quickly before pressing his jacket (which for some reason was folded on the floor) to the wound on Michael’s head. Jeremy managed to pull the man close so he could hold the fabric to the wound while still being able to dial for the hospital.

Jeremy didn’t know how Michael had been injured, but based on the teeth marks, he had a sinking feeling Mangle had done something to the poor man. He did look a bit too similar to his father for Jeremy’s liking. That had to be the real reason Michael was so vigilant and why Evan was so paranoid about him missing things in the cameras.

The children stopped arguing to look at him when he was explaining things to the emergency operator, seeming to realize that maybe there were more urgent things to deal with than whatever they’d been arguing about. Jeremy clutched the plastic tightly in one hand as he clutched to Michael’s injury with the other.

Evan was the first to approach Jeremy, looking more disheveled than Jeremy even knew ghosts could be. “You’re the rabbit thing.”

Jeremy nodded awkwardly. He knew they’d discovered him the minute he’d woken up and was tangled in that same shimmery stuff that he’d seen under his skin before he transformed the first time.

“Our conversation isn’t over, Evan,” the girl said, impatiently. “Sure, Mike takes priority, but the fact that you guys tried to lock me away is absolutely insane.”

“How about we skip the interrogation until we know that Michael’s okay,” Jeremy said weakly.

“I guess that’s a good way to put things.” The girl crouched at Michael’s side, brushing bloodied hair out of his face. “Although you and me need a talk at some point, Mr. Fitzgerald.”

“I’m long overdue for talks with a bunch of people now,” Jeremy muttered.

Please be okay.

[commandershepardvasfuckit]

An Arranged Marriage, part 7

(This is the second part posted on the same day! Make sure you didn’t miss 6!)

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6

M!troll x f!reader

1.2k words (tw for mention/suggestion of assault)

Zen’jan’s secret left you reeling and without a plan you left the city, but is the wilds really any better?

————

All the air left your lungs at his words, you want to scream but could not even manage that.

“It is alright” Zen’jan said trying to reassure you while getting up and taking a step towards you, finger still bleeding and dagger still in hand, “You are safe here, I promise! Please just sit and listen to me” he took another step towards you and reached for your hand.

“Don’t touch me!” you screamed at him, finally finding your voice. The clawing panic was rising in your throat, threatening to strangle you into silence again.

You looked at the man in front of you, the man who had been taking care of you and watching over you, it was like he was a complete stranger all over again. A follower of the Shadows, and avatar of the God of Shadows!

He looked visibly hurt and took a step back, “I am so sorry, I know I should not have sprang this on you, but please just listen to me, to Tsov’ka” slowly he reached his hand back out to you.

“No! Leave me alone!” you scrambled away from the shrine, away from Zen’jan. You did not know where you were going, but you had to get away. The brighter lights of the other shrine rooms and then the daylight blinded you, but once more being in the light comforted you and shook the deep chill out of your bones.

You kept moving, putting as much distance between yourself and the shrines, and hopefully Zen’jan. Nowhere felt safe, not home, not anywhere in the city, no one to talk to.

Out of the city it was then. You passed under the main gates that lead out of the ravine and into the surrounding grasslands. A few times you came out here with Bira, you knew it was pretty safe, especially if you followed along the small mountain ranged that housed the city.

For hours you walked, at first occasionally seeing people or passing by farms until they got fewer and fewer until you truly were alone. You did not have a plan, all you knew was that going back to the city was not an option.

You walked until your legs nearly gave out, collapsing into a sobbing mess, leaning against one of the very few trees in the grasslands for a needed bit of shade. It was a bit before midday when you had left, now the sun had moved fairly far along its path and would start in set in the next hour or so.

You curled up, maybe a nap would help you clear you mind a little.

“What’s a human doing way out here?” came a man’s voice that jolted you awake.

“Isn’t she the Lord Admiral’s daughter? The one that got married off?” came a second voice.

“Lucky day if she is” said the first one again.

You cracked your eyes open just enough to check your surroundings. Several human men stood around you, still not aware you had woken up.

“Whatcha figure she’s doing out here?” asked another.

“Who knows, who cares. You know the reward on her if anyone gets her back to her father? Set for life” answered the first.

Your father? None of it particularly made sense, you were tired and dehydrated, but at least this could be your way out.

“She’s a pretty thing, isn’t she? Shame she’s been ruined by a fucking monster” another chimed in.

“Speak for yourself, I’d still fuck her” the second piped up.

“Isn’t the reward for either bringing her back or for making it look like the monsters killed her?” came one of the previous voices.

“It is, it’s anything they can use to righteously start this war again. Get her home and let her father spin some horrible tales, or just kill her now and make it look like the monsters turned on her” answered the first again.

The War. It had only ended a few months ago. The death toll on both sides had been horrific, though most of the fighting all happened on the seas and grasslands surrounding the city here, and you had seen just how bad it was.

“Seems like a lot of effort to bring her back, another mouth to feed and supplies are already low. I say have a little fun with her and the just kill her” one suggested.

Your heart was racing, suddenly things were going sideways very fast. There looked to be six or so of them and only one of you, not good odds. You weighed the chances of bolting, though you were not sure if you could get away fast enough.

“Fine, it’s all the same in the end. Grab her and bring her back to camp at least though”.

You decided to take your chances, it looked like either die for sure soon or at least try to live. With whatever strength you could muster you leapt up and booked it, only making it a few steps before you were grabbed by your wrist.

“Now where do you think you’re going, little thing? And how much did you hear?” asked the first. He was an imposing man, the quintessential bandit looking type, as were the others.

You screamed, loud as you could until he placed a hand over your mouth.

“Screaming isn’t going to do anything, you’re miles and miles from anyone else, and you’re going to give me a headache with all that. Someone, knock her out”.

Before you could register anything else you were hit with a blinding pain on the back of your head, then blackness.

You awoke with a splitting headache and to the muffled sounds of voices.

“…in a bit, where’s she going anyways? Her hands are tied” one said.

It was dark, you had been tossed in a tent with your hands tied and left alone for now. Tears streamed down your face. You ran from the shadows, you heeded the teachings of the Light, why didn't the Light protect you?

It was getting cold with the sun down now, you could see the shadows cast by the fire poking under the tent, but its warmth could not reach you.

“It’s fucking cold, isn’t it?” one of the men asked.

“Toss some more wood on the fire then” another replied.

“And it’s fucking dark” the first speaker said.

“It’s nighttime, of course it’s dark you f-” he was cut off.

Everything was eerily silent for a moment, then the world was plunged into inky black darkness.

Screaming and snarling pierced through the stillness. Bloodcurdling screams of dying men and the snarls of something else. You held you breath and squeezed your eyes shut while you tried to block out the sounds of death. Fear gripped you and you just hoped whatever was out there would miss you.

Moments dragged to minutes, to what felt like an eternity until nothing but silence remained and the glow of the fire returned. Cautiously you peered under the edge of the tent, nearly retching at the sight. Blood soaked the ground in shiny puddles, men lay in shreds, mauled to the point of being unrecognizable amongst the viscera.

“I am so sorry” came a familiar voice at the door of the tent.

You looked up to see a figured cloaked in shadows, but it was a familiar one.

“Zen?”

And once more the world was black.

Part 8

[dira333]

Surprise em Series

Part 2 - Monoma Neito

“Shit!”

Neito stops dead in his tracks. “What?” He asks, the ties in his hands and the impossible decision of which one to wear today momentarily forgotten. He knows that tone in your voice and it’s never good.

You’re just on the other side of the door, putting the last finishing touches to your make-up, or so he thought.

“I forgot my pill.”

“What pill?”

“The pill. The one that you’re supposed to be taking when you don’t want to get pregnant.”

“And?” He asks, taking the few steps necessary to look at you.

You’re staring at the blister pack in your hand like it personally threatened your life. 

“Doll?” Neito asks again, dropping the ties and reaching for your hands. “Talk to me?”

“I forgot a whole week. How could I forget a whole week?”

“It was a pretty stressful week,” he reminds you. “We had like, two villain attacks and that audit of accounts.”

“Still,” you’re sniffling now. “You don’t just forget something like that. Oh my god, what if I’m pregnant? I can’t get pregnant! Do you know what kind of mother I’d be? I’d be forgetting our kid everywhere!”

“Now, don’t talk like that. You’d be an amazing mother!”

“You think so?” He nods, hoping it will calm you down. 

“Right,” you sniffle once more, wiping your nose. “Right. I’m a Pro Hero. I beat villains and accountants.”

“That’s my girl,” he breathes out in relief. “Look, even if you were pregnant, it wouldn’t be a big deal, right? We’re married, successful, and healthy. My mom would kill for a grandchild.”

You snort. “Don’t phrase it like that, that’s creepy.”

“You know what I mean,” he tickles your side gently, smiling when you laugh. “Now, can you help me pick out a tie?”

-

You don’t seem too bothered by this mornings happenings.

Granted, you do call your doctor to figure out how to get back on the pill after the missed week but other than that he can’t tell any difference in your demeanor.

And maybe there shouldn’t be. It’s just a missed pill, or seven, to be exact.

But he can’t help but think about the implications.

What if you are pregnant? He thinks of your shared home, of your smile when you wake up and your laughter ringing through the rooms.

What would it be like, to add another person to that mix?

“Neito?” You ask and he blinks himself out of his daydream, smiling a little absentmindedly.

“Yes?”

“Are you okay? You’ve been staring into space for a whole minute.”

“Yeah, just… thinking.”

“About what?”

For a moment he considers keeping silent. After all, you seemed shaken enough by this mornings happenings.

But you’re you. You know him too well to swallow any lie he’d feed you.

“I was thinking about having a baby,” he offers quietly, pushing the vegetables around his bento. “How it would be like. I knew we wanted to wait a bit, but… wouldn’t now be the right time?”

You stare back at him, your face empty of emotions.

“Love?” He asks. “If you’re not ready for it, that’s completely okay.”

“I-uh.” You hesitate. “I took a test. Half an hour ago in the bathroom.”

“What kind of test?”

“A pregnancy test, what do you think?” You hiss and he snorts at his own stupidity.

“Sorry, carry on.”

“Well, as I said before you interrupted me, I took a test because I could be pregnant and I wanted to make sure.”

“And?”

“Well, I was too scared to check, so I just tossed it in my purse.”

“And you’ve been sitting here, eating all calm, with that in your purse?” He gasps, lunging for the unassuming accessory next to your chair.

“I didn’t know how to bring it up!” You defend yourself but get out of the way of his searching hands.

It doesn’t take long to find the test.

“What do… What do two lines mean?” He asks, staring at the little pink stick.

“Pregnant. That… I’m pregnant.”

[dbnightingale24]

React

A Stepcest Love Story About Jim

~~

~~

Chapter 1

See? I'm actually updating in a non-annoying time frame.

Word Count: 4,958

Warning: Swearing, Family Drama, Stepdaughter/Step Father interest, Drinking, Drinking Relapse, Minors DNI, Emotional Cheating, Forbidden Love, Slow Burn, Flirting...I think that's it.

Summary: Things become more intimate between you and Jim.

~~

I do not give permission/consent for my stories/works to get posted elsewhere. I do not condone this type of behavior/relationship, this is for entertainment purposes only.

~~

~~

Chapter 2

“Why don’t you want to go tonight?” your best friend, Ciara, asks you take a seat next to her on the sofa, and you both watch Nora play on the floor. 

“Why do you want to go so bad? You hate her,” you laugh.

“Be that as it may, your Mum knows how to throw a party, and she seems to want you to go pretty damn bad.”

“Eh, she probably just wants to make up for embarrassing herself in front of her new husband,” you mutter with an eye roll.

“That’s the other thing! I wanna see your hot new step daddy,” she smirks mischievously, and you burst out laughing. 

“I thought you and Darragh are trying to make a go of it?”

With a shrug, she simply responds with, “I didn’t say I’d touch, I just wanna look.”

“You’re a fuckin’ mess,” you laugh as your phone buzzes for the millionth time. “Fuckin’ hell,” you groan, checking another text from your Mother.

Life Giver: Jim and I would really like it if Ciara and you came tonight. We’re gonna have so many friends...it’ll be good for us.

Since the fiasco that was you coming home two weeks ago, your Mother has been doing her best to get on your good side, and has only blamed her “blowup” on you a handful of times.

For her, that’s growth.

In all honesty, you’re not even mad at her, you’re just not in the mood for any of her theatrics. You already know how the rest of the Summer will play out if you give in and forgive her but, at the same time, she does have Jim now. The last thing she wants to do is make a fool of herself again. He seems like the kind of man who’s finally giving her the life she wants, and she’ll kill herself before she fucks that up.

“C’mon, maybe it’ll be fun,” Ciara encourages, pulling you from your thoughts.

“You just want free booze.”

“Well, there’s also that,” she agrees with a laugh. “Darragh is picking up Nora, and he’ll have her for the week. So, if this party sucks, I’ll have the rest of the week to make it up to you,” she promises with pleading eyes. 

“Do you really think it’ll be worth it?”

“Y/M/N is a lot of things, but a bad party thrower is not one of them.”

She had you there. For all of the faults your Mother has, she’s always been able to throw a party that people talk about for months. It’s one of the perks about having a young Mother. She had you when she was 16, and the second you were out of her, she went right back to partying. She may be turning 40, but you’re more than sure she still knows how to throw a party. 

“We’ll go for an hour, and then we’ll go dancing,” you smirk as Ciara lets out a squeal of delight.

Picking up your phone, you’re quick to respond to your Mother and let her know that you Ciara will come by for a little bit before going out.

“Darragh will be here in about an hour, so I’m gonna get Nora’s bag together, and we’ll get outfits together after they leave.” “How’s that going by the way? Where do you two stand?”

“I don’t know. It was a nasty and we can both still be pretty nasty to one another, and we don’t wanna raise Nora around that. We were so young when we had her, no clue what we were doin’, and we blamed each other. However, the love is still strong and we’ve ended up in each other’s beds more times than either of us can count. I don’t know, it’s hard but we’re trying. My parents aren’t happy.”

“Your parents put you out, who gives a fuck what they think?”

“I don’t know, they’ve been asking to come around and see Nora more, we’ve had a few talks and they apologized...they were disappointed in me-”

“My grandparents were disappointed in my Mum, but they didn’t put her out, and they sure as shit didn’t leave me alone to fend for myself. I’m glad you’re working things out with them, but I still don’t forgive them.”

“Babe, could this be some leftover anger towards your parents?”

“Nah, I’m just tired of shit parents. We get stuck with the suffering, and then we’re just supposed to forgive ‘em like it’s nothin’, and it’s not fair. You got top marks, there’s not a single person who can find somethin’ negative to say about you, and you’ve always been honest with them. Even when it was hard. You do one thing they don’t like and they put you out. Now, after the damage has been done, they’re ready to talk. Even if you actually want nothing to do with them, you’re not going to deny Nora the chance to have a relationship with them. They mess everything up and you’re the one stuck with cleaning it up.”

“I didn’t say it was any easy talk,” she mutters, running a frustrated hand through her hair, “there was a lot of yelling and crying. You’re not wrong in what you’re saying.”

“Even with my Mum, the argument we’re having is my fault. It can’t be that she lied to Jim, it’s my fault because I ruined the lie she set up.”

“What exactly did she tell him?”

“She told him she doesn’t drink that much, that she and I have always had a really great relationship but I made her take a backseat for school, and she doesn’t blame me for it-” “You’re serious?”

“Yup, and she told him that I’m not good with young kids, that’s why she’s been anxious for me to meet his.”

“You’re great with kids!”

“But this is my fault. I’m just tired of shitty parents. Why is always our job to be the ones to clean up after them?”

“Well, lets get little miss ready for her Father, then we’ll get ready to go,” she smiles as she picks up Nora, who claps and laughs at her Mother. “Like you said, we’ll go for a bit then we’ll go out.”

Smiling as you take Nora from her, you nod in agreement, “sounds good to me.”

Being the paranoid Mother shes always been, Ciara takes her time packing, double and triple checking everything as you dance around with Nora. By the time Darragh arrives, she’s packing the bag for the fourth time.

Laughing as he takes Nora from you, he assures her, “I’m sure you packed everything.”

 “We’re going out tonight and I don’t want you to have to come back because I left one of her comfort toys out. She’s been really fussy lately, and it really helps.”

“She has toys at my house too, love. It’ll be fine. What’s going on tonight?”

“My Mum’s birthday party.”

“You’re talking to her?”

“She won’t leave me alone about it, so I figured we’ll just go for a bit, then go to the Pub or something.”

“Don’t hit her.”

“She hit me!” you groan as he starts laughing. “Take good care of my goddaughter.”

He smiles as he starts to bounce her in his arms, promising, “only the very best.”

He’s quick to give Ciara a kiss before rushing out, and she bites her lip to fight off a smile.

“So uh, when’s the last time you two ended up in each other’s bed?”

“Last Saturday when I went to pick up Nora.”

“I hear chaotic wedding bells.”

“Lets get ready!” she laughs, pulling you up the steps along with her.

Getting ready proves to be harder than you can you imagine, because you truly have no idea what to wear. You haven’t been to one of your Mother’s parties in over a year, and you don’t want to overdress, and you also don’t want to under dress. 

Plus, there’s Jim. Your stepfather.

You’re so anxious about seeing him again, and you can’t figure out why. You’ve only met him the one time, but he left a lasting impression. You honestly don’t know why it matters so much, because it’s not like he’s anything to you. Yes, by marriage he’s your stepfather, but what the hell do you need one of those for? As far as you’re concerned, you’ve only ever had one father figure and he was your grandfather. Once he died, you didn’t need anyone else. You didn’t trust anyone else. 

You take about 20 minutes going back and forth between your favorite plaid mini-skirt, and your favorite black denim shorts, before Ciara finally took the reins and decided for you. She dresses you up in the plaid mini-skirt, your old ‘Siouxsie & The Banshees’ t-shirt that you stole from your Mother when you were 13, and black combat boots.

Looking yourself over in the mirror, you ask, “do you really think this is alright?”

“It’s the best of both worlds, babe. We’ll do your hair up in simple little space buns, and you’re all set.”

“Why do you always know how to dress me better than I dress myself?”

“Because you overthink every little thing,” she laughs as she sits you down and parts your hair. “I’m really happy we re-dyed your hair. The blue blends perfectly with the black. These buns are gonna look amazing!”

“Maybe leave a strand down on either side. That’ll look nice.”

“Now we’re talking!” she squeals.

As you start working on your makeup, your thoughts slowly start to calm down. You’re overthinking for no reason. You’d both had a long day, drinks were had, and you were both tired. No more no less. Once you see him again, and feel nothing towards him, you’ll see that all of your worrying is for nothing.

You hope.

~~

“How is it that your Mum always has a house full of people, and never runs out of booze? What was point of bringin’ the whiskey?” Ciara gripes as you two make your way inside.

“Cause, it’s her birthday and you’re supposed to bring a gift.”

“And what, might I ask, did she get you for your birthday?”

“Peace and bloody quiet.”

Ciara laughs and nods in agreement, “the best gift she could ever give you, honestly.”

“GIRLS!” your Mother’s voice rings out as she stumbles out of the living area.

Ciara scowls as she covers her face, “Christ on a bike.”

“Shes had to been drinking since morning,” you mutter with a smile as your Mother finally reaches the both of you and sloppily hugs you both.

The party started an hour ago.

“Happy birthday!” you beam, hugging her back. “We brought whiskey.”

“Not as if she needs it,” Ciara mutters and you stomp on her foot.

You’ll be dammed if an argument breaks out just as soon as you’ve arrived.

“Jim’s in the kitchen talking with Rose. Come and say hi!” she slurs excitedly, grabbing your hand and dragging you along with her, and your quick to latch onto Ciara and pull her along.

Not surprisingly, Rose is standing a little too close to Jim, but you know she won’t actually act on anything. For as much as you’ve never liked Rose, she’s most loyal friend your Mother has. They’ve been friends since they were 8, and wherever there’s an adventure, you’ll find them together and ready to engage.

Rose gushes once her eyes land on you, “there’s our girl!”

“Hey Aunt Rose.”

“And you brought Ciara! It’s been so long since I’ve seen the both of you!” she practically screams, engulfing you both in a tight hug. Clearly just as drunk as your Mother.

Your Mother pulls the bottle of Ciara’s hands as she comments, “I’ll take this and make you two drinks! I’m so happy you’re both here!”

Well, at least she’s having a good birthday.

“So, any big news? Anything happenin’ back at school? Any boys? Any jobs lined up after?” Rose questions off at rapid fire once she finally lets go of you and Ciara.

“Oh, uh, well I’m just-” “Hold that thought! I see Amy!” she squeals before running off.

“Is everyone fuckin’ drunk already?!” Ciara exclaims, gaining a small laugh from Jim.

“Well, Y/M/N has been up since 10, so she started drinking at 10:01.”

“Ah, you’re learning fast,” you giggle.

“Yeah, she wasn’t like this last year for any of the parties she threw. She drank, but it was actually during the party.”

“Just you wait till I finish school.”

Ciara snickers and shakes her head, “God, that’s gonna be so much fun, and we won’t remember a thing.”

“Right you are,” you laugh in agreement. “Jim, this is Ciara, my best friend since grade school. Ciara, this is Jim, my Mother’s new husband.”

“So you’re the hot stepdad? I get it, I completely understand,” she nods, slowly taking him in, as you burst out laughing and Jim becomes visibly flustered. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Hot stepdad, eh?” he nods towards you.

“Words were said,” you shrug with a smirk as your Mother finally makes her way back over with the drinks.

“Jim, I’ve made you one too! This is party!” she laughs, handing out all three cups. “AMY!” she yells before stumbling out.

“You may as well drink up, because it’s only going to get worse from here,” you promise, raising your cup. “Cheers.”

“Cheers,” Ciara and Jim cheered in unison.

As you take a large sip of your drink, you feel Jim’s eyes glued to you, and every feeling you thought felt wash away comes rushing back. You look him directly in the eyes while continuing to drink, and Ciara between the both of you with a smirk tugging on her lips.

Oh God, you know that look.

Once Jim puts his cup down, he clears his throat, “are you girls staying for the whole party?”

“Uh-”

“Yes,” Ciara interjects, and you shoot her a look, which she completely ignores. “Figured it would be best, since everything was left such a mess before. If there’s one thing that’ll make Y/M/N forget that she’s irrationally upset, it’s booze and a party.”

Oh my God.

“Jim! Come say hi!” your Mother calls, laughing along with Rose, Amy, and you’re guessing Amy’s boyfriend.

“I’ll circle back,” he promises with a nod and a soft smile, before walking off.

“What are you doing?!” you snap once Jim is out of ear shot.

“Investigating.”

“Investigating what?!”

“Just how long you should be staying at my place.”

“What?”

“You don’t fool me. I saw the look you two exchanged, plus, Daddy Dearest couldn’t keep his eyes off of you.” “Stop it, he’s just being nice. It’s an awkward situation to be in because my Mother is...my Mother, and I guarantee he doesn’t know a majority of the people here.”

“What does have to do with you?”

“He knows me!”

“He met you the one time.”

“Ci-”

“There’s no harm in staying, besides, we can get shit faced here and sleep it off at my place.”

“I really don’t want to be around Rose all night,” you scowl, taking another sip of your drink.

“I won’t leave you to these assholes. Lets just stay and see what happens,” she suggests with a shrug before downing her drink. “Refill!”

You should’ve gone to the pub. You should’ve gone anywhere but your Mother’s house.

~~

4 Hours Later...

You and Ciara are absolutely shit faced, along with everyone else in the house. Between the calls for shots, not drinking as much water as you should have, and the drinks Ciara kept making for you, there was no other choice for you.

“Do you think your Mum locked the door to your room?” Ciara slurs, leaning against you.

“Hmm? What? Why?”

“I have to pee!”

You giggle and grab her hand, leading her through the crowd of people and make your way upstairs, “come on.”

“I love Nora, but I’m so happy I get to sleep this off.”

“Feel shit already?”

“No, but I know I will in the mornin’,” she groans and you giggle. “I’ll stand guard, go to the bathroom,” you encourage with a smile once you reach your room. 

“You’re a saint, baby,” she praises as she stumbles into your bedroom, practically running to the connected bathroom.

Giggling to yourself, you lean against the wall and take a sip of your drink. 

“What’re you doin’ up here?” a deep voice asks, causing you to jump.

You laugh when you see Jim stumbling out of your Mother’s bedroom, “Ciara needed to use the toilet, so she’s using the one in my room.”

“The ones downstairs are taken?”

“Guess so,” you smile up at him, taking another sip of your drink, “what’s your excuse?”

He sighs as he goes to take a sip of his drink, “I was hiding.”

“Ha! She finally wore you down?”

“How does she know so many people?!”

“She assumes everyone she parties with is her lifelong friend. They don’t judge her so, naturally, she wants to be around them all the time.”

“You don’t like them, then?” 

You scoff, “not in the slightest.” “Not even Rose?”

“That bitch. I especially don’t like Rose.”

There’s a small silence before he comments, “you look nice tonight.”

“Yeah?”

“I think you know you do.”

“Wasn’t too sure, didn’t get many compliments tonight.”

“Then they weren’t payin attention.”

What the fuck are you doing?

“You should probably go and find my Mother.”

“She’s fine on her own.”

“It’s her birthday.”

“She threw the party. I’m having much more fun where I’m at.”

“And why’s that?”

“I’m going home,” Ciara states, suddenly coming out of your room, surprising both you and Jim.

“What? Why?”

“I need sleep.”

“You can sleep here.”

“Too fuckin’ loud and, knowing your Mother, she’ll want to keep this up for another few hours.”

“Well, how the hell are ya gettin’ home? You’re not walkin’.”

“I spent the last 5 minutes orderin’ a service. By the time I get downstairs, it should be here. I take you’re stayin?”

“You how she gets. Jim’s never dealt with her and Rose never stays to help.”

“You’re a better daughter than she deserves,” she smiles, wrapping you in a hug. “You’ll come round tomorrow?” “Yeah, let me know when you’re home safe, okay?”

She lets go of you and nods, “promise. Nice meeting you, Jim.”

“You too, get home safe,” he smiles as Ciara starts down the stairs. 

And just like that, you and Jim are alone again.

“You can go back into hiding again, she’s useless at this point.” “I can handle her.”

“While I believe that,” you giggle, “I’m saving you.” “And who saves you?”

“Me,” you smirk before walking off.

It’s nothing. Nothing at all. You’re both drunk, irritated, and it’ll mean nothing in the morning. It can’t mean anything, because you’re not that awful of a person. It’s just a bit of innocent fun. Nothing that can’t be shrugged off. 

For the rest of the night, you do your best to distance yourself from Jim, no matter how many times you catch him looking your way. When the party finally starts to wind down, as you predicted, Rose is the first one out the door, leaving your Mother half asleep on the couch.

“C’mon Mum, time to get you upstairs,” you groan, lifting her up.

“No-”

“Literally everyone has gone. It’s just you, Jim, and myself. It’s time for bed.”

“Great, your mad-”

“Not mad, just drunk and tired. Everyone needs to go to sleep. Now, up.”

With a huff of annoyance, she forces herself up and puts most of her weight on you, and you both slowly start on your way to the stairs.

“She alright?” Jim asks, coming to help, and wrapping your Mother’s other arm around his neck.

“She’s fine, just drunk.”

Your Mother scoffs in annoyance, “it’s not even that late.”

“It’s 2am,” you grunt, trying to keep everyone balanced.

Once you’re all finally at the top of the stairs, both you and Jim start to struggle, because your Mother has officially passed out and is now dragging her feet. Nonetheless, you both get her to bed and, while Jim undresses and dresses her, you set up water and ibuprofen on her bedside. 

“Got it from here?” you ask softly.

“Yeah, you alright?”

“Mhm, I’ll see you in the morning,” you smile before quietly making your way out.

Against your better judgement, after you’ve changed into one of your old nightshirts, you go downstairs and start to clean. No, you don’t plan on cleaning everything tonight, but your Mother won’t be up until late afternoon and there’s no way in fuck you’re gonna wanna clean all of this when you get up.

“What are ya doin’? I’ll take care of this,” Jim states gently, causing you to jump.

“No, get some rest. I’ve got it.” “Y/N-”

“I’m used to it. I’ll do some now and the rest tomorrow.” “You don’t have to take care-”

“I’m just used to it.”

“You don’t have to be anymore.”

“Jim-”

“I’ll take this side, you take the other,” he half smiles and you giggle.

“Sounds good.”

Maybe you should’ve gone home with Ciara, because the fact that it’s just the both of you, and you’re walking around in a long t-shirt and panties, and you’re once again drunker than you ever meant to get. If there’s one thing your Mother can unite everyone in, it’s getting people entirely too drunk. However, you can’t lie and say the extra help isn’t nice. Ciara would help if she was able, but her parents always hated her staying over as well as the state she would come back in, so help didn’t happen often. 

It’s only your second time with the older gentleman, but gentleman he is indeed.

“I think that’s a good bit for tonight,” you smile when you both meet up in the kitchen.

“There’s barely anything left for tomorrow.”

You scoff, “which makes my life easier.”

“You don’t have to take care of it, angel.”

Angel? That goes straight to foggy brain. 

“It’s just what I’m used to-”

“You don’t have to be, not anymore. You’re not alone,” he promises softly, faintly slurring, as he softly caresses your right cheek with his right hand.

The hand without his wedding band.

You find yourself leaning into it for just a moment, before pulling away and looking up at him, “goodnight Jim.”

“Night angel.”

Stumbling up the steps, you’re quick to escape into your room, finally letting out a breath didn’t even know you’d been holding. You don’t even bother to turn on the light, you just plop down on your bed and grab your phone to send Ciara a quick text. 

Y/N: Thanks for letting me know you’re back safe. Lots to talk about when I get back, and what the fuck? I should’ve left with you, lol. Anyway, I love you, night.

Too wired from your interaction with Jim, you decided to mindlessly scroll through your phone, trying to find literally anything to take your mind off of him. However, nothing seemed to do the trick. God, why couldn’t you just have decided to stay with Ciara from the very beginning? At this point, you would’ve much rather stayed oblivious to this whole damn thing. Your Mother clearly had no problem hiding it, so why now?

You’re just about to send Ciara another text when you hear your door open. 

“Jim?”

Almost instantly, the light comes on and he looks mortified, “fuck! I’m sorry, I wasn’t...I didn’t...I’m-” Laughing and waving your hand to beckon him in, you shake your head, “it’s fine.”

“I wasn’t payin’ attention-”

“It’s really alright, Jim. You’re drunk and it’s late. I don’t take it as you creepin’ in on me.”

“Good...thanks,” he laughs awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Everything alright?”

“Yeah no, I’ll leave you to it-” “What’s bothering you?” you ask, placing your phone down and sitting up.

“It’s no big deal-”

“Then you should have no problem telling me.”

He motions towards the room and you nod, as he enters and closes the door softly behind him.

“I’m just wonderin’-” “Jim, you can sit on my bed, I won’t bite,” you laugh. “I promise to be a good girl, daddy,” you tease, not noticing how he swallows thickly as he makes his way over and sits on the edge of the bed. “What’s got you all worked up after such a rowdy party?”

“Well, that’s it,” he laughs nervously, “has it always been like this? How did I not see it?”

“In your defense, I triggered it. I trigger her.”

“How? You’re an...an angel, and I don’t see how-”

“No one wants to commit themselves to a teen Mother, she didn’t want the responsibility, and my grandparents didn’t hold their tongues on how disappointed they were in her. I represent failure and resentment. I didn’t get knocked up in the back of some loser’s car at a concert, I’m continuing my education, my grandparents always made sure to tell me how much they love me and how proud they were...she feels like they wished I would’ve been their daughter instead. Which, isn’t the case at all, they just wanted her to do better. Her argument was always that she was young, and they always told her that it didn’t stop her from opening her legs,” you shrug with an awkward laugh. “We’ve had our rows in the past, some of them bad, and she knows how I feel towards her. I guess, now, she wants me to see that she’s changed. Stable man, stable life...she’s finally grown up. However, when I first met you, I was rightfully angry with her, and now she feels all those things again and she just...she spirals,” you smile weakly, wiping your eyes. “So, it’s not that you’re not a good judge of character or anything, you just didn’t know everything.”

He’s looking at you with the softest eyes, and you force yourself to look away, because it’s entirely too much for you to handle in your current state.

“I just...I’m not giving up on her or anything, I just don’t know how to handle her when she’s like this,” he mutters, turning away from.

You clear your throat and reach out for his hand, “well, take into account that tonight was a good night. She was hanging all over you, she wanted you by her side, and she was laughing and dancing almost the entire time. Yeah, she still drank her face off, but she was bearable. On her off nights...”

“What?”

“You go for a walk, go see friends, maybe go to the cinema...just let her have her fit. There’s no reasoning, because she’ll just want to argue and won’t take any accountability. It’s never worth it. Especially if Rose is with her.”

“Yeah, what’s the story there?”

“Rose is the worst fucking person. She’s selfish and a deadbeat. Whenever my Mother wanted to actually make an actual attempt to be a parent, Rose was always there to say ‘your parents will take care of her! You’re young!’ and yeah, my Mother is her own person, but Rose didn’t help anything. The moment I was able to drink, they brought me everywhere so they’d have someone to bring them home, and Rose would talk her into going off with her to do God knows what and leave me on my own.”

“Why does she keep her around?”

“That’s her best friend. When Ma got knocked up, Rose stayed by her side, she doesn’t make her feel bad about herself, she’s been there after every guy left, and they party together. Rose is a terrible influence, but she’s always been a good friend. Gotta give her that,” you mutter.

Jim looks as if he wants to say something, but he’s at a loss for words. So, you smile and take control of the conversation.

“I couldn’t help but notice you going through the record collection tonight.”

He laughs softly, finally taking your hand in his, “you noticed, eh?”

“This has always been a family of impeccable music taste.”

“I could tell by the shirt you wore tonight.”

“Yeah? Tell me more about what you love.”

It’s not like you mean to keep him in your room for so long, but you two get so caught up in conversation, and you lose track of time. At some point, you both end up laying down on your bed (your head on his chest and leg around his waist while his hand is wrapped around you and stroking your hair), and none of it feels wrong. You know it is, but you feel so at peace with him, that it just feels as if it’s meant to be.

‘None of this will matter in the morning,’ you tell yourself mentally.

You yawn as you slowly start to succumb to sleep, “Jim?”

“Yeah angel?”

“When I leave, she’ll go back to normal. It won’t always be like this,” you promise softly and he lets out a heavy sigh. “What?”

“You shouldn’t have to leave for her to go back to how she was.”

“It’s what’s best for everyone.” “Not me,” he mutters into your hair before pressing a soft kiss into it, and your heart breaks at his words. “Just sleep. We both need to sleep.”

As you drift off, you tell yourself that none of this matters. Nothing that’s been discussed, and not you two holding each other close while your Mother snores the night away in the next room. All of this is just temporary until you leave.

Too bad your heart won’t follow suit.

~~

[stopisa]

brother’s best friend

cw: pussy eating <3

part 1 part 2

“shshshh” gojo hushes in response to your light moans as he kisses each thigh, gesturing your legs to hook over his shoulders. your little secret relationship had been going on for the last two months. sneaking in kisses in between the aisles at the library, holding hands under the table, and of course, scenarios like these in your dorm where he’s lapping his tongue like a meditative prayer between your legs. all in secret because god only knows what would happen if word got out that you two were a things. especially if it got to your brother’s ears.

running your fingers through his soft, snowy hair you let out airy, pathetic whines in pleasure, “f-fuck~” eyelids fluttering as you hope this feeling lasts forever…

the feeling is cut short by a knock at your door. startled, you jolt, pulling gojo up by his hair. “hello, y/n, you here?” fuck. shit. nononono. getou is standing outside, oblivious to the degenerate activities occurring behind the door. you and gojo stare wide-eyed at each other. another knock, “y/n?”

your instinct kicks in, “yea?! sorry just woke up from a nap.” you pretend to yawn, “what’s up?” gojo smirks at your blatant lie and proceeds to lower his head down to your heat again.

“um, did you forget we were supposed to get dinner with gojo? for some reason he’s not answering his phone so i’d thought get you first.”

before you could respond gojo starts sucking on that sweet spot again, “OH! i-it totally slipped m-my mind.” you shoot your head towards gojo, giving death glares into his crystal blue eyes. “you ok? you sound like you're out of breath?” your brother’s worry only agitates your anxiety but for some reason, the pleasure from gojo’s mouth is almost ethereal by the way it moves against your heat.

"i'm...i u-uh feel a bit under the weather." you state while faking a cough. "well you should've said something, i coulda brought medicine for you, if you open up i can-" you immediately cut him off with a "nope!" and at the same time you feel two of gojo's slender fingers slide into you. the silence behind the door is loud. you decide to break it, " 'just don't wanna get you sick too, it's p-pretty bad.."

getou sighs, "ok, guess i’ll check again and see if gojo is up for dinner still." you hear foots walk away from the door , and gojo believes it too as he continues eating you like a starved man. you hiss a whisper to him, "i'm so gonna kill you". he removes his mouth with a pop from you clit, "you sure you wanna do that before coming?" and already knowing the answer he dips down again.

a blaring ringtone comes from gojo's pocket and you immediately know it was the one he assigned to getou. getou booms from the other side of the door, never having left, "GOJO YOU SICK FUCK I KNOW YOURE IN THERE FUCKING MY SISTER!"

yea, you're gonna kill him.

[seungkwansphd]

cast me in a better light

pairing: musical actor!Joshua x pit orchestra member!YN word count: 5.9k synopsis: Joshua is a great singer and actor, you can admit that, but would it kill him to have some rhythm? The Christmas musical really will fail if you can't figure out how to read his cues, but he's wondering if you'll ever realize that he's sending you a different kind of signal, too. genre/themes: romance, fluff, grumpy/sunshine dynamic, allusions to a bad breakup, hallmarkian romance, lol.

a/n: this is part of the @svthub snowventeen collab! you should check out all of the other wonderful writers & stories! also these are the songs i drew inspo & lyrics from (don't sue me) griff - on foot in front of the other ariana grande - santa tell me (slow & reverb)

You balled your free hand into a fist as you turned back in your sheet music for what felt like the thirteenth time. It was your third rehearsal with the cast for this year’s Christmas musical and you were wondering if you could get away with strangling the lead, Joshua Hong, with your bare hands. You weren’t even working on anything difficult, but this man could not seem to sneak through a back alley with any sort of consistent rhythm pattern, so consequently you had nothing to follow. Your beats on the high toms kept missing his footsteps and everyone’s patience was wearing thin.

“Joshua, YN?” Janet cleared their throat, “Can you two spend some time together working on this? We need to either decide on a set tempo or work out some visual cues so that YN can follow your footsteps. We do need to move on for today though.”

“Of course!” Joshua smiled brightly at the orchestra conductor, “We’ll make time!” he gestured theatrically in a way that made you want to throw your drumsticks at him.

“Great,” Janet nodded at him before looking back down at the score, “Alright, let’s continue,” they lifted their baton, leading the pit through the second number.

“You still want to do dinner?” you asked Tetiana as she packed up her violin and bow.

“Yes! Although…,” she trailed off, pointing to something behind you.

Furrowing your brows, you turned slowly to see your one and only leading man, Joshua Hong. It was highly unusual to see cast members down in the pit.

“Hey YN! Thought I’d get your number so we can coordinate a few practices to nail down the walks,” he smiled at you.

“Ah sure,” you nodded. None of this would be necessary if he could just walk like a human person.

“Do you have regular days that work well? Or what do you think?”

“To be honest, my schedule is pretty irregular,” you answered honestly, thinking through the various jobs that you had lined up over the next couple of weeks. “I have a chunk of time free on Thursday between two and three pm?”

“That should work! I’ll text you to confirm,” he nodded, running through his own schedule in his head.

“Sounds good,” you raised your eyebrows at him, “Don’t get lost on the way out,” you couldn’t help but tease.

Joshua either didn’t hear you or didn’t respond as he walked backstage, but Tetiana laughed at your joke, which was enough to satisfy you.

“Ready to eat?” you asked her with a smile.

“Yes,” she laughed heartily. She wondered just how difficult of a time Joshua was in for during these one on one sessions.

❄❄❄

“Why can’t we just do a simple 2/4 or 4/4 pace when you walk from stage left to the alley?” you asked, slightly irritated already.

“Because it’s not what the character would do,” Joshua rebutted, as if what he was saying made any sense. “And depending on the show, the atmosphere may be different, so I want to leave it open for interpretation!”

“I-,” you cut yourself off, remembering your conductor’s words. “Okay, well then can we implement some sort of physical cue? Like a shoulder movement or something? I need to be able to follow you,” you suggested.

“Can you just watch how I move and see if there are any physical cues that I'm already doing?”

“Sure,” you sighed, gesturing for him to do his walk.

You watched him closely, eyes traveling from his shoulders to his fingertips and then back up to his torso, hoping to pick out some sort of movement that corresponded to his footsteps. You’d never seen Joshua at such a close distance before. From the pit, he was little more than the rough outline of a person, but up close you were forced to acknowledge how handsome he was. As you watched him move, you also realized that Joshua was much broader than you would’ve guessed. You were surprised when the thought hit you. Things were certainly easier when you watched him from a distance.

“Well?” he asked, turning his head to look at you after completing his exaggerated walk.

“Sorry, can you do it again?” you asked, shaking your head briefly to clear your thoughts.

“Yes,” he nodded, moving to start again.

You crossed your arms, tongue dragging across your teeth as you regarded him. Without even having to look, Joshua could feel your eyes rake up and down his figure as he walked and walked and walked. Your eyes burned into him intently and for someone who was a professional performer, he was surprised to find himself somehow nervous. Your tongue toyed with your left canine until you finally noticed that there was this little thing that he did with his chin just before he took a step. You might be able to work with that.

“Okay, I think I got something!” you clapped your hands together in relief, moving to the keyboard that was set up across the room from your drumset. “Okay, can we take it from here?” your fingers played out the closing melody that directly preceded his walk.

“Oh, yes?” Joshua did a double take. The way your fingers ran across the keys took him by surprise. “You play piano as well?”

“I’m a professional musician,” you wrinkled your nose up at him, “I can play several instruments.”

“Ah, of course,” he flushed.

You keyed out the melody again, leading him into his walk. He waited for you to cross the room to pick up your drumsticks before he started walking and you half-managed to follow his footsteps this time.

“That was better,” you shrugged, “We’ll need to keep working at it though,” you shrugged, eyeing the clock. You had to leave soon if you wanted to make it to band rehearsal on time.

“Oh right, you had to stop at three,” Joshua nodded, following your line of sight.

“Yeah,” you shrugged. The hour had passed quickly, most of it spent bickering, unfortunately. “When are you free next?”

“Saturday is pretty open as of now,” you suggested. “Would ten-thirty in the morning work?”

“Yes!”

“Would you mind actually meeting at my house? I have band practice right before and it would be nice not to have to drive here and set everything up.”

“Oh, sure I guess? What’s the address?”

“I’ll text you,” you smiled gratefully as you packed your drumsticks away, “Have a good day!”

❄❄❄

Joshua double checked the address before he got out of his car. He was halfway to the porch when the sound of music out back caught his ear. He was quite early and figured it wouldn’t do any harm to check it out. As he got closer to the source, the sounds of keyboard, drumset, and guitar became more individually discernible and these ensemble sounds worked together to complement the lead vocalist. Was this the band rehearsal that you had been referring to?

Joshua finally rounded the corner of the house to face a detached garage where the band was rehearsing. His eyes went to the drumset first, where he expected to see you. The large man seated behind the bass drum, however, was decidedly not you and so his eyes flitted around until they landed on the person standing behind the keyboard. You were playing and singing with such joy on your face and it made him stop in his tracks.

“I didn't think I'd get back up I didn't think I'd be alright again You know it's easy when you're young, bounce back and whatever You just bounce back like it never happened”

You sang with your eyes closed, fingers gliding across the keyboard with an ease that startled Joshua.

“I put one foot in front of the other today I stretched my arms out wide and it felt real strange And then my legs, they started shaking and my hands, they started quaking 'Cause things just take longer to heal these days”

The tenderness with which you sang the last lyrics triggered a small burst of warmth in his chest and when your eyes opened to meet his, his heart jumped fully into his throat.

“Oh, you’re here,” you blurted into the mic without thinking, surprising your band mates.

“Hi, yes,” Joshua cleared his throat, “Sorry I’m early!” he waved at everyone good naturedly.

“Who is this?” your bassist, Elena asked, eyes dancing curiously at you.

“Joshua, he’s the lead in that musical I’m working,” you shrugged, for some reason embarrassed that he had seen you singing.

“Oh nice!” your drummer stood up to introduce himself, “I’m Amir, and that’s Elena. It’s nice to meet you man!”

“Hey thanks! Nice to meet you too,” Joshua smiled back at the large man, “I didn’t know you sang,” he remarked at you.

“I mean…we barely know each other,” you couldn’t help but remark.

“I guess that’s true,” he chuckled good naturedly, “You guys sound great!”

“Thank you” Elena chirped excitedly, “You should follow us on social media!”

“Please,” Joshua nodded way too genuinely, pulling out his phone and looking over Elena’s shoulder as she showed him the band’s various handles.

You knew that didn’t make any sense. You should want everyone and their mother to check out your music, but there had always been an unspoken separation between the cast members and pit orchestra and so it felt very odd to be letting Joshua into your life in this way.

“Do you wanna take that again,” Amir asked you, bringing your thoughts back to the present, “Or did you feel good about that?”

“I felt really good about that, actually,” you nodded and you meant it.

“Me too!” Elena chirped in agreement.

“Cool, well we’re done a little early so if you two need to work on whatever you need to work on, we can make ourselves scarce. But…,” Amir turned his eyes to Joshua hopefully, “If you might wanna jam with us…Elena and I have been learning ‘My Shot’ from Hamilton!”

“Oh hell yes,” Joshua answered seamlessly.

“Right on!” Amir nodded excitedly, sitting back down behind his drum set as Elena wiggled excitedly.

You gestured towards the microphone stand as you got out of the way for Joshua. He pulled the mic out of the stand and your jaw dropped when he started…rapping?

“Hey yo, I'm just like my country I'm young, scrappy and hungry And I'm not throwin' away my shot”

Amir’s grin grew wider and wider as he picked up on Joshua’s flow. You watched, eyes widening with amazement, as he just continued and continued. You knew it was a silly stereotype, but you didn’t ever think you’d see him rapping and you were surprised at how decent he was at it. You could tell that he was out of his usual element, but he managed to still have a swagger and presence that was quite different from when you’d seen him during rehearsal. Elena’s delight grew unbridled as they ran through a good amount of the track before Joshua ran out of breath.

“Sorry!” he laughed apologetically, “I don’t typically rap,” he smiled genially.

“No, don’t apologize man, that was awesome!” Amir shook his head vehemently.

You grinned as you watched the three of them bond. Amir and Elena had always had such open and welcoming personalities, so it didn’t surprise you that they connected with Joshua immediately.

“Of all the things I never thought I’d see,” you remarked as you looked at him with a newfound appreciation.

“I mean we barely know each other, right?” he couldn’t help but throw your own words back at you. He must’ve been still reestablishing his blood oxygen equilibrium, because there was no other explanation for why he winked at you.

You blinked.

“Well, we ought to get out of your hair cause we’ve probably eaten into enough of your rehearsal time,” Amir spoke up after exchanging a glance with Elena. They both packed up quickly and made themselves scarce as you settled in behind the drumset, adjusting the stool way, way down.

“That was fun,” Joshua smiled at you as you warmed up.

“You were perfectly on beat there! So if you could just do that while you walk,” you teased, eyes creasing as you smiled at him. Joshua opened his mouth, but you cut him off, “I know, I know, that’s not what the character would do,” you shook your head playfully at him.

You were pleasantly surprised that the next hour passed quickly. It was probably because Amir and Elena had helped break the ice a little bit, but you felt a lot more comfortable with Joshua today. In turn, he also seemed more open to your input and you were able to work out a decent system for establishing a walking or transition pace. Eventually, you got bored and worked on a few other passages before your stomach interrupted with a loud rumble.

“Was that your stomach?” Joshua asked, surprise evident on his face.

“Yes,” you laughed sheepishly, “I should eat something. Do you want to take a break? I’ve probably got something we can snack on.”

“I wouldn’t mind a snack,” Joshua smiled at you in a way that was disarming.

“Okay, follow me then,” you turned away, nervous, allowing him to follow you,  “Don’t judge me, I know the place is a mess!” you disclaimed as you led him through the house. Joshua’s eyes widened with wonder as he inventoried the many, many instrument cases scattered around your house.

“How many instruments can you play?” he looked at you in wonder.

“I, uh,” you made a face as you counted in your head. “All of the strings and most of the percussion instruments.”

“What? That’s amazing!” Joshua gaped at you. He was truly impressed.

“Thanks,” you chuckled, a bit shy at his obvious admiration. Avoiding his gaze, you searched through your cupboard for something to eat.

“Can I try this?” Joshua gestured to the cello laying on the ground while you slid two frozen waffles into the toaster.

“Sure!” you called over your shoulder as you moved to the fridge. Waffles and cereal it was! You laughed to yourself as you heard some fiddling followed by a few noisy scrapes.

“This sounds horrible,” he remarked to himself as he continued to drag the bow across the strings determinedly. You couldn’t fight the smile that spread across your lips as you watched him out of the corner of your eye. You were surprised that you still found him endearing as he continued to make such grating sounds.

“You’ll have to adjust the pin,” you gestured to the bottom of the cello as you approached him, assessing the situation. “Here, hold this for me,” you lifted the instrument to the appropriate height and waited for Joshua to grab the instrument. You reached down between his legs and pulled the endpin out so that the cello sat at a better height.

“Okay, that looks better, now let’s address this grip,” you smiled, grabbing his hand and adjusting his fingers so they held the bow in a less awkward way. You didn’t notice, but Joshua’s Adam’s apple bobbed erratically when you moved to adjust his other hand on the neck of the cello. “You might actually be good at the cello,” you remarked, taking his left hand into your own. “You have these nice long fingers!”

Before he could respond, the waffles jumped in the toaster, pulling your attention away. It was just as well, because the best Joshua could’ve offered was a garbled cough with the way you had managed to fluster him. Blinking rapidly, he stood, placing the cello back on its side.

In the kitchen, you reprimanded yourself mentally as you placed the toasted waffles onto plates. Joshua did have nice hands, but you certainly didn’t need to be saying that out loud! Wordlessly, you brought everything to the kitchen table and gestured for him to sit.

“Hope you like Cap’n Crunch,” you laughed, “It’s the best I can do with no notice.

“I love Cap’n Crunch,” he smiled genuinely, “So do you teach as well?” he asked between mouthfuls. You nodded and worked through your own mouthful of cereal before answering him.

“Yes! I teach a handful of students, mostly string instruments.”

“Wow, that is really amazing,” Joshua beamed at you one more time before you ate in silence. The crunch of the cap’n filled the room and you were struck by the odd sense of intimacy that filled the moment. You wondered if it was one sided before you finished up and resumed practice

❄❄❄

Joshua couldn’t keep his eyes from wandering to you in the pit. You were laughing easily with some of the other musicians and he was surprised at the way he felt almost jealous? It made sense, of course, you knew them much better than you knew him. Prior to this show, you’d never even interacted, but after spending some time with you over the weekend, Joshua had had a lot of trouble keeping you out of his mind.

“Ready to get started?” Janet tapped their baton against their music stand.

Everyone directed their attention to the podium and flipped to one of the big dance numbers. It was quick and before long you were deeply immersed, trying to keep time with their steps.

“Very good, nice work!” Janet clapped happily, more than pleased. “Joshua and YN, great job nailing down the transitions as well! They’re looking much better.”

You smiled back, pleased as well. Joshua instinctively looked towards where he knew you were, even though it was too dark to see you anymore.

“Hey, YN!” you heard Joshua’s now familiar voice as you were on the way out of rehearsal.

“Hey, nice job today,” you smiled at him.

“Thanks to you,” he felt inordinately pleased to receive your compliment. “Hey if you’re not busy, do you want to grab some coffee?”

“I’m not, but why?” you asked.

“I-, do I have to have a reason?” he paused, furrowing his brow.

“I mean, I guess not but this is a little unusual. The cast members typically don’t acknowledge our existence,” you chuckled. You were probably being a little unfair, but this was also true.

“Well, you’re not exactly making it easy,” he pushed back, raising an eyebrow.

“…Fair point,” you had to admit. “You’re right. Let’s go get coffee.”

Joshua beamed.

“I like Almanac, but where do you like for coffee?”

“I like Almanac too!” Joshua’s eyebrows raised in surprise, “See we’re more similar than you give us credit for.”

“I already admitted I was being unfair,” you raised your brows at him, heading towards your favorite coffee shop.

“So how was the rest of your weekend?”

“It was pretty busy, but good! Yours?”

“It was also good,” Joshua smiled. You watched the way the corners of his lips curled up in a catlike fashion. “I had some free time after our practice, so I went to visit my mom.”

“Oh, nice! Does she live close? Far?”

“A couple of hours away, so it’s not too far. She’s getting a little older now, so I try to visit regularly and help around the house however I can.”

“That’s sweet of you,” you smiled. Joshua had always seemed like a gentleman and this was consistent with that.

“It’s the right thing to do,” he shrugged, opening the door to Almanac for you.

“YN!” the roaster, Sam, greeted you, “And Josh?” He did a double take when Joshua followed you inside. “Do you two know each other?”

“We do!” Joshua nodded, “You weren’t kidding when you said you like it here, huh?”

“I take my coffee very seriously,” you threw him a pointed yet playful look. “What’s interesting today?” you turned back to Sam.

“For you? I think you’ll like the Burundi best? Very juicy and complex,” he regarded you for a second. “And for you, Joshua? I think the Honduras? Nutty and more chocolatey notes.”

You and Joshua both nodded. When it came to coffee with Sam, you’d both learned that it was always best to go with dealer’s choice.

“Do we want these for here or to go?”

“I, uh…?” you looked at Joshua, this had been his idea to begin with.

“Here?” he suggested, hoping you didn’t feel obligated.

“Sure,” you shrugged.

“So how do you two know each other?” Sam asked as he bounced around behind the bar, grinding beans and prepping pour overs.

“We’re both in the Christmas show,” Joshua answered first, gesturing vaguely towards the theater where you’d just walked from.

“Well, he’s in it. I’m in the pit orchestra,” you felt the need to clarify.

“You’re in it! There’s no musical without the orchestra!” he insisted enthusiastically.

“I would agree with that,” Sam chuckled, intrigued at your dynamic.

“You know what I mean though!” you scrunched your face at Joshua, “If you say ‘I’m in a musical’ people think you mean the cast!”

Joshua blinked down at you. His lips curled up at the corners, amused at your fervor. Sam watched with a grin on his face as you and Joshua bickered playfully.

“Okay, here’s your coffee kids,” he finally interrupted, sliding two ceramic cups across the bar.

“Thanks Sam,” you beamed at him before turning to search out a table. It wasn’t terribly busy, so you were able to grab seats at the bar looking out the window. “So did you have something you needed to talk to me about?” you asked, shifting slightly to face him.

“No, I just wanted to spend some time with you,” he laughed, leaning back in his chair.

“What?”

“What?” he asked, a little confused that he kept having to explain why he wanted to be around you. You were incredibly talented and interesting, did you not see that?

“Sorry I’m not good at making new friends,” you chuckled wryly.

“You’re okay,” Joshua smiled. “I was actually hoping to ask you about your music making process. If you don’t mind.”

“Oh?” your eyes lit up. This was a topic that you could talk both of his ears off about, if he let you.

“Yes, I was wondering who writes your lyrics and whether you have a process for it. Like lyrics first and then music or vice versa?”

“That’s a good question that’s impossible to answer,” you grinned at him. “Amir and Elena and I tend to each write our own tracks, but we do ask each other for input. For me, I write the lyrics first and fill in the music around them. Elena is the opposite and Amir does both, depending on his mood. Do you write music?”

“I have tried in the past. But I’m primarily a vocalist, so I never really got to the part about filling in the music,” he chuckled sheepishly. “I can get by on guitar, but that’s about it.”

“It’s certainly not easy,” you laughed, “And then there’s the issue of baring your heart and soul to the people who do actually listen.”

Joshua enjoyed the way your eyes sparkled as you talked excitedly about your music making process. You didn’t seem to like to talk about yourself otherwise, so he hoped he could learn more about you through your music. Your next show was already marked down in his calendar and he couldn’t wait for the day to come.

“Sorry I’m talking your ear off!” you chuckled, bringing your mug to your lips.

“I like it,” his eyes creased as he smiled at you, resting his chin on his hand, eager to hear more.

You blinked. His statement was so straightforward and caught you off guard. You weren’t able to fight the heat that crawled up your neck, so you pretended it was a win that you hadn’t choked on your coffee entirely.

“Oh my gosh, I have to get going,” Joshua’s eyes widened when he noticed the time.

“Oh, okay!” you nodded. “Sorry, I told you I could talk forever about this!”

“Don’t be sorry. Time passes easily with you.”

“This was fun, thanks for suggesting it,” you stepped past his compliment and through the door purposefully. “Oh, it’s snowing!” you gasped, extending your palms upwards to catch a few flakes.

“Pretty,” he murmured, eyes watching you as snowflakes landed in your hair.

“It really is,” you turned towards him, fully beaming now. You loved being outside for the first snow each year. You and Joshua exchanged a laden glance before you couldn’t stand it anymore and excused yourself. It was cold out, but you almost couldn’t feel it.

❄❄❄

“Are you gonna sing tonight?” Elena asked you, eyes bright with curiosity. You tended to be fifty-fifty when it came to karaoke night. Sometimes you were in the mood and other times you weren’t. Tonight you were decidedly on the fence, so you planned to just go with the flow.

“Not sure yet, but I am here to support you,” you grinned, nose scrunching affectionately at her. “Is Amir coming?”

“Yeah, but he invited someone else so he’s waiting outside,” Elena nodded.

“Oh, okay!” you shrugged. It wasn’t unheard of for others to join you, but it wasn’t frequent either. You wandered to the bar to grab a beer while you waited.

“Yo!” you jumped slightly when Amir’s booming voice was accompanied by his hands clapping down on your shoulders.

“Jeebus,” you scrunched your face up at him.

“Two pilsners, please?” he signaled to the bartender before pulling you into a hug. “How’s things?” he asked as you headed back towards Elena.

“Pretty good! How are yo-oh?” you stopped mid-sentence when you saw Joshua sitting with her.

“Hey,” he smiled gently, waving at you.

“What are you doing here?”

“I invited him!” Amir stated as a matter of factly as he took the seat next to Elena at the picnic style table. You climbed over the bench on the other side, taking the spot next to Joshua.

“We’ve been chatting,” Joshua explained helpfully.

“Oh,” you nodded, though you were full of questions, “It’s good to see you.”

“You too,” he nodded, left knee nudging yours under the table.

Your heart flipped in your chest. You hadn’t seen Joshua since your post-rehearsal coffee, but he’d certainly been on your mind. If you squinted, in the right light, you would almost think that he was interested in you. But then again, you’d also thought things with your last partner had been going well just before they’d broken up with you too.

“What are you singing?” you asked, pulling yourself out of your thoughts.

“Well it has to be holiday themed, so that narrows down our choices,” Amir stroked his chin playfully.

“Have you decided?” Joshua turned to you, eyes curious.

“I’m not sure I’m going to sing yet,” you half-smiled at him.

“Oh come on! I’ll sing if you sing,” he offered.

“Why would I care if you sing or not?” you countered.

“Hm. You’re telling me you don’t want to watch me make a fool of myself singing Mariah Carey?” he teased, corners of his lips curling up playfully.

“Wait,” you blinked, “Wait, no I really do,” your eyes widened as you processed his words.

“You’d better pony up then,” he threw you a playful look as he brought his beer to his lips.

Elena watched Joshua with severe interest as he watched you wrack your brain for Christmas songs. He was so clearly interested in you, but she couldn’t tell whether your obliviousness was purposeful or not.

“What about ‘Santa Tell Me’?” she suggested, electing to help you out of your misery.

“Oh! I do like that song!” you smiled at Elena gratefully, “Will that do?” you turned to Joshua, an eyebrow raised expectantly at him.

You honestly expected him to say no and request a rendition of something much more embarrassing, so you were caught off guard when he cocked his head to the side and raked his eyes over you before nodding. Elena’s eyes widened before they flew to Amir to see whether he’d been paying attention to this exchange. As was typical, he seemed blissfully unaware as he drank his beer.

“Do we sign up? Or how does this work?” Joshua asked, craning his neck towards the MC.

“Yep, they have a sign-up sheet there!” Amir nodded.

“Shall we?” Joshua turned to you, extending his hand towards you.

“We?” you couldn’t help the question that escaped your lips.

“I don’t trust you not to chicken out. I would like to watch you put pen to paper,” he grinned mischievously at you.

“Me? Chicken?” you gasped, offended. “I would never!”

“Then let’s go,” Joshua chuckled cooly.

“Fine,” you scoffed, placing your hand in his and following him to the MC’s station.

“Amir!” Elena squealed as she watched you leave. “I think something’s going on?”

“Oh yeah, Joshua likes YN,” Amir shrugged, nodding as if it wasn’t a big deal.

“Wait, what?”

“He told me. Why do you think I invited him?”

Elena’s mouth hung wide open at this revelation. Of all the things she never thought she’d see, Amir meddling was pretty damn near top of the list.

“Am I going first or are you?” you asked Joshua as you held the pen above the sign-up sheet.

“I’ll go first,” he shrugged good naturedly, “It was my idea after all.”

“Okay,” you nodded, scribbling his name and then your own just below it, “No backing out now.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he winked at you. He couldn’t seem to help himself from teasing you tonight.

You watched, fascinated, as Joshua chatted with Elena and Amir. You’d have thought they’d known each other for years, but when you sat down to do the math, you were surprised to realize that it had really only been a few weeks since they’d met. It was a pleasant surprise, but a surprise nonetheless. Pulling yourself out of your thoughts again, you met Elena’s gaze, which was loaded to say the least. When she realized you were no longer spacing out, her eyebrows raised as her head jerked subtly, yet meaningfully, towards Joshua. You knew what she was saying and you maybe even agreed. You just needed to have another mental breakdown or two before you decided what you wanted to do about it.

“Oh, I’m next!” Joshua announced as he watched names on the screen flicker by.

“Break a leg,” you beamed at him. He faltered for a moment at the genuine openness of your smile.

You watched with a mixture of excitement and secondhand embarrassment as Joshua started his rendition of Mariah Carey’s ‘All I Want for Christmas Is You’. It was stupid, but you were surprised at how good he was. He didn’t take himself too seriously, hammed it up when it was appropriate, and by the end of it you were smiling widely and singing along. In fact, you were enjoying yourself so much that you practically forgot you were meant to sing after him and rushed on stage at the last minute. Joshua handed you the mic with a playful chuckle, fingers brushing for just a moment.

“Santa, tell me if you're really there Don't make me fall in love again if he won't be here next year Santa, tell me if he really cares 'Cause I can't give it all away if he won't be here next year”

Joshua smiled as he watched you sing. He wasn’t surprised that this song resonated with you. While perusing your music, it had become apparent to him that you’d gone through a big breakup sometime in the last year. He could certainly understand the reluctance to get involved with someone new, but he also hoped that he could prove himself to be a steadfast friend and potential partner.

You smiled impossibly wide as you grooved to the background music; you really did love this song! Inevitably your eyes moved back to your table and you paused when Joshua caught your eye. His eyes had creased into semi-circles and his lips had curled up just slightly at the corners as he watched you. Your brain stuttered and for whatever reason, the next lyrics that left your lips were from the explicit version instead.

“Oh, I wanna let him unwrap me, like oh-woo-oh Get on top of him, by that fireplace, oh-woo-oh But I don't want a new broken heart This year I've got to be smart”

Joshua’s eyes widened in surprise as the crowd erupted in whoops and cheers. The way you’d held his gaze while singing had left his heart pounding wildly in his chest.

“Eee, you did so good!” Elena squealed excitedly when you returned to the table. It took every fiber of her being not to scream over your sudden improv. “I love that slowed version too.”

“Really good,” Joshua half-smiled, thinking furiously about when and whether to make a move.

“Thanks,” you giggled shyly, grateful for the residual adrenaline of performing. “When are you two up? I kinda want to go out and get some air, but I don’t want to miss you guys!”

“We’re not for a while, go for it! Bring us some beers back too,” Amir waved you away playfully.

“Okay, I’ll be back soon!” you waved briefly before heading out the door to the patio.

The gears continued to turn in Joshua’s head until Amir and Elena simply couldn’t take it anymore.

“Dude, what are you doing?” they demanded in unison.

“What?” Joshua looked up, slightly startled.

“Go get ‘em! Now’s your chance!”

“Now?!” He looked panicked.

“They wanna let you unwrap them, like oh-woo-oh,” Elena sang playfully at him.

“Get on top of you, by that fireplace, oh-woo-oh!” Amir harmonized before breaking out into a fit of giggles.

Joshua stood up. They were right, this was the opening. He headed towards the door he had seen you exit through and found you standing outside alone.

“Gah, I don’t know how you do it!” you started chattering when you saw him, “I still get such nerves about performing in front of crowds like that!”

“It doesn’t really ever go away,” he smiled reassuringly, stepping towards you. “Cold?” he asked, watching you blow warm air on your hands.

“I was hoping the fresh air would help me calm down a bit, but now I’m just cold,” you laughed sheepishly.

Joshua chuckled, folding his long fingers over your hands and pulling you towards him. You swallowed audibly as you looked at him, heart pounding even faster now.

“You are a captivating performer and a talented musician. The nerves never really go away, you’ll just get better at managing them,” he gazed deep into your eyes. “You made me feel a lot of feelings up there.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, I’m not sure I’ve heard that version before,” he teased, grinning at you.

“I didn’t-, I don’t,” you floundered, but you didn’t really have much of an explanation. You had simply been flirting with him and he was flirting back.

“Can we go out on a date?” he asked, “If things go according to plan, we’ll be here next year too.”

You fought the urge to roll your eyes as you realized he was quoting your karaoke lyrics back to you. It was so corny and yet…it was working. You pushed up on the balls of your feet, leveraging his grip on your hands to pull him into a kiss. You could feel him smile against your lips and when you pulled away, you could see that a single snowflake had landed on his nose. What in the Hallmark movie?

❄❄❄

Thanks so much for reading! Would love to hear what you think and please also check out the other 'snowventeen' fics!

[kittkatattacks]

Wip Wednesday 7/31/24

These are hella late but here are my sentences for 7/31 :)

Perfect season 20-22 for:

@happinessisntfun @owlbearwrites @1attheedge @eriquin

“I need you to get some information to the little lord.”

“Ah, I see. And what exactly would I be telling him?”

“Riko is getting out of control. He sent some of the freshman Ravens over to Palmetto to kill one of our players.”

“Are you absolutely sure?”

“Yes. the player who was attacked saw who it was and I’m sure there’s a paper trail that leads back to the side branch if not to Riko himself.”

“Alright, I’ll check it out and relay your message. Is there anything else?”

“Thank you, and no, there’s nothing else right now.”

“Very well then, I’ll let you go.”

“Bye,” Neil says, and hangs up the phone, handing it back to Andrew.

He pockets the phone, leans back on his elbows and stares out at the parking lot. Neil doesn’t feel like going back inside so he sits with Andrew and stares at him, admiring how the sun lights up his hair and makes his eyes glow gold.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

AFTG space au for:

@enigma-the-mysterious @scifikimmi @auburnlaughter @adhdavinci

Neil finishes signing his email, heart pounding in his ears and sends it off before he can think about it too much. He quickly closes his laptop and leans back in his chair, folding his arms behind his head and then takes a few calming breaths.

In, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8

Out, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16

In, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8

Out, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16

He does this until he feels his heart slow and gets up to get ready for the day. 

Neil barely makes it through his first class; the professor monotonically goes over the syllabus and then keeps them there for another half hour talking about himself and how he ended up in ‘such a fine establishment’. He resorts to alternating between drawing on the handout given to them at the start of class and stabbing himself in the thigh with a pen.

He meets up with Jean for a late lunch and they both talk about how their classes are going so far.

“I’m just saying, that class is shit. I don’t understand why we need to take it.” Neil says, referring to his undergraduate studies class.

“We have to take it because someone,” Jean replies, stabbing a piece of broccoli with his fork, and then pointing it at Neil, “wanted to explore Europe instead of going to college when we graduated.”

“Whatever,” Neil says, swatting the broccoli away. “It's not like I made you come with me.”

“True, but irrelevant. Besides, if you had gone on your own, who would have been there to take care of you after all of the times you got into fights and needed patching up.”

“I could have done it myself or gone to a clinic,” Neil says, already knowing he’s going to lose this argument.

“Bullshit. I’ve never met someone who hates hospitals more than you do. Also I’ve seen you try to patch yourself up, you’re pretty shit at it.”

“Alright, Alright,” Neil says, putting his hands up in surrender, “you win.”

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

YLPWBOYF for:

@somefishycat @wizisbored

Lola wastes no time getting into his space, knife in hand, crowding him even more into the car door. 

“So, Junior,” Lola says, like she’s gossiping with a friend, “I’ve just got to know, where’d Mary run off to?” She presses the tip of the knife into his cheek when he doesn’t immediately answer, just enough to draw a drop of blood. 

Nathaniel doesn’t flinch despite the pain he feels and replies, “Like I’d ever tell you that.”

“Maybe,” Lola says, “but I have a feeling you’ll tell me sooner or later.”

Nathaniel wants to question how she plans to do that, but keeps his smart mouth shut, his mind already coming up with multiple ways that she could.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

DMRA for:

@zyrafowe-sny @whimsicalmeerkat @aparticularbandit @post-and-out

Aaron can tell he’s struck a nerve, the bulging veins on either side of Hill’s forehead giving away just how much he has. 

Halsey steps between them, redirecting Hill’s attention to him and Aaron takes the chance to give Kevin a once over.

Aaron hadn’t thought much of him when he first walked in, having been more focused on Hill. However, now that he’s really looking, he notices how muscular Kevin’s arms are, his jade-green eyes and how he towers over most of the people in the room, including himself.

Aaron turns his attention back to Hill and Halsey, “I look forward to seeing you in class,” Hill says, but Aaron can tell he is still pissed from earlier despite the smile he wears.

He glares at Hill until he’s gone and turns his attention back to Halsey who checks his watch, “I’ve got to go, there’s a call I need to make. Kevin, could you please show Mr.Minyard the Emergency room.”

“Of course, I was on my way over there anyway,” Kevin says.

Aaron gives Kevin his full attention now that Halsey is gone, “You sure know what to say to impress important people huh?”

“I assume you mean Hill.”

Yeah, he’s a pain in the ass but he’s got a lot of influence here. Let me guess, you’re taking Dr.Hill’s class?”

“Yep.”

“Well, if I were you, I’d tone down the animosity. Getting an F in his class is like a bad review from the New York Times; it’ll ruin your career before it even begins.”

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

[raychleadele]

What resources would you suggest for someone who wants to get into plant life?? I live near Dallas and I’ve tried my hand out a few times with plants but I feel so clueless and I’m not even sure what plants would thrive here! Any books? Videos? Podcasts??

I watch a lot of YouTube videos! What to recommend fully depends on what kind of plants you want to get into. Different kinds of plants require different kinds of care.

Succulents and cacti have similar care requirements, including WAY MORE LIGHT THAN YOU THINK. Succulents especially have a reputation for being easy to care for, and they are, but only after you figure out what they want. I spent years killing them before I got comfortable with them, but I love them now! They really really don’t need much water - mine get watered around once a month at most, but often even less - and you will want to get them a grow light. No, a sunny window isn’t enough. One of my favorite YouTubers for succulent care is Succulents and Sunshine.

Other houseplants need water more frequently and can thrive with less light, but even “low light” varieties do need light! A sunny window can be enough for most of them, but if you want plants in other areas of the house, a grow light can still be beneficial. A moisture meter is a cheap tool that can help you check if they need water or not. I usually water mine around once a week. A good YouTuber for houseplant care is Sheffield Made Plants.

If you want to grow things outside, first you want to look up the USDA Plant Hardiness Zone Map. Hardiness zones simply are a code to tell you what plants can grow well in your region, and are based on average low temperatures of a region. Pretty much any plant or seed you buy will have a suggested zone range on its tag. Higher numbers have higher average low temperatures and generally a longer growing season. I believe Dallas is in Zone 8, which is a couple zones warmer than mine.

If you want to grow vegetables, which is something I love doing, you can start seeds in a seed tray indoors under a grow light a few weeks before your last frost and then transplant them to your garden once the weather is warm enough and the seedlings are at least a couple inches tall. I did this with tomatoes and peppers this year, and they did great! Some plants do fine being “direct sown” (planting seeds directly in the garden without being started indoors) and I’ve had good success doing this with lettuces and other greens, as well as beans. Regardless of your method, you usually want to plant more seeds than you think you need, because not all of them will sprout. If you don’t want to bother with planting seeds, you can get plant starts at a plant nursery or big box hardware store. I usually do this for things like herbs. Outdoor plants will need to be watered more often than indoor plants because they dry out more quickly. I usually try to water my vegetable garden about every 2-3 days, but they’ll want daily water when they’re very young. One YouTuber I like for vegetable gardening is Gardener Scott, who is in Colorado, but I’m sure there are others who grow in a climate more similar to yours, so look around!

I don’t have much experience growing flowers outdoors, but I imagine the advice for them would be very similar to my advice for vegetable gardening. I don’t have any content creators to recommend for this category unfortunately, but I’m sure they’re out there!

This is just a very quick overview, but hopefully these tips can help you get started! If you want me to dig into a particular kind of plant more deeply, I’d be happy to! And don’t let a plant death discourage you - I have killed so many plants in my many years of caring for them, and even just this year I had multiple things in my vegetable garden simply not grow at all. (Looking at you, chives. Two years in a row now that they haven’t even sprouted! What the hell!) Every failure is a chance to learn, and not a sign that you’re not good at it! When something dies, or simply doesn’t sprout, don’t give up. It happens to all of us. Good luck planting!

[scoobydoodean]

i think it’s kinda funny how you don’t have some sort of online handle except your urls, so i can only ever address you as like dftsam. anyway i saw a take that said cas “learned” to feel unloved from dean, from the way dean treated him basically - an example they gave was dean looking away when cas said I love you as he was dying in s12 - and it seemed there were a lot of people agreeing with it. i’m not one of them, but if you were interested (only if you’d wanna talk about it, I’d get it if you didn’t) I’d love to get you thoughts on this idea?

So I read this at like 1-2 AM lying in bed and I was like this:

I find it so fucking funny when people start in on this shit, because Dean girls and Cas girls can do this to each other all day long. “Dean made Cas feel unloved” “Cas made Dean feel unloved”. You can build a framework for either (BOTH) by cherrypicking scenes to suit a narrative. Like. I can easily say that Cas repeatedly sent a message, regardless of his intentions, that Dean’s feelings don’t mean jack shit to him. I prefer to take things with humor and just understand where Cas’s issues are coming from (just like Dean—who makes his best effort to understand Cas; just like Cas makes his best effort to understand Dean) rather than get mad and demonize him so I can be angsty about Dean always feeling "unloved"… but the guy… look—making no effort to explain why he is like this at this moment (because Cas apologism is absolutely not the point of this ask) Cas is known to do the following:

Control the means of communication. You will pretty much never see Dean ghost Cas. Even when Dean was forced to kick him out, he checked up on him to make sure he was okay. But Cas will knowingly and intentionally ghost Dean’s prayers and calls for days and weeks at a time on repeat through their ENTIRE RELATIONSHIP. Dean has expressed that this upsets him more than once, but Cas continues to do it. Every once in a while he’ll throw in a half-assed apology sure—but it doesn’t mean anything. He’s going to do the thing he’s apologizing for again as soon as he’s decided he doesn’t want to face Dean’s questions or doesn’t want him involved yet again. Which means 1) he isn't actually sorry 2) how it makes Dean feel is not important to him or else he'd stop doing it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Keep secrets about bad things going on CONSTANTLY. Over and over and over and over… then Dean is still the one who ends up apologizing for getting mad about it. Rinse, repeat.

(Often) Refuse to be a team player in an effort to keep Sam and Dean out of harms way over the things he has personally decided are too dangerous for them, without ever letting them have a say, because he has unilaterally decided they are too tiny and soft and he needs to fall on a sword when no one asked him to and no one WANTS HIM TO. A lot of people want to turn this into bemoaning Castiel's constant unappreciated sacrifices, but this is so unbelievably shortsighted of a take. He is attempting to relate to Dean, a person who believes he is poison and that loving him gets people killed, by attempting to fucking martyr himself over and over and OVER. Dean doesn't WANT it, and it isn't NECESSARY 99% of the time if Cas would just WORK AS A TEAM.

Urges Dean to co-parent children who he feels he has personal obligations to twice.

Who does that remind you of? Because I know who it reminds me of, but people don’t want to read that meta—or about how Cas traded out his car for a truck (who else did that?), or about how your last words before a sacrifice can haunt a person and rip them open in ways you never intended. Of course Cas isn’t that guy… but I bet my ass Dean sure as hell sees the shades of him.. I do think it is an intentional decision to frame Cas in the late seasons after another person who also made Dean feel very unloved and unwanted—not in the big things like big grand sacrifices—but in the small things—the day to day things that slowly strangle a relationship to death—like making unilateral decisions for everyone and not answering the goddamn phone. (Edit here: I do NOT mean that Cas is intentionally being framed as CRUEL and EVIL. I only mean that he is intentionally being paralleled with John. Dean and Sam are also paralleled with John in different ways at various points and it doesn't mean any of them are evil irredeemable villains. They just have some obvious hangups and the way this particular one for Cas ends up manifesting is probably pretty difficult for Dean and probably makes him think of John behaved and how it made him feel).

Dean didn’t react right when Cas said I love you in season 12? Well. That’s debatable. But going on the offensive first before the defensive: Cas only wants to say this on his deathbed when Dean has no chance to respond.

Dean, on the other hand, has expressed his care for Cas MULTIPLE TIMES. He didn't say the words, "I love you" (he doesn't even say that to SAM) but he said "We're family" "You're the closest thing I have to family—you're like a brother to me" and "I need you" and "I'm not leaving without you" and "Being with you today is the most I've laughed in years" and "I'd rather have you, cursed or not" and "It's a gift. You keep those. Let's work as a team. We're better together."

And what does Cas do after every single one of these expressions of Dean's love?

He L E A V E S!!!!

He fucking leaves, and Cas girls want to talk about Dean making a face? And cry that Dean makes Cas feel unloved? Forgive me if that makes me fucking CACKLE at the AUDACITY.

I think one thing people tend to do, is they frame everything as if Cas is oblivious to Dean loving him, but Dean has to know or SHOULD know how Cas feels about him. This is why we get rancid takes like "DeAn nEedS tO pUll hIS hEaD oUt of HiS asS". Oh shut up. Castiel canonically can SENSE DEAN'S LONGING. If Dean's head is up his ass, Castiel's is shoved so fucking far up his sphincter it's coming out of his mouth.

Yet still—Dean recognizes, in season 11, that Cas is struggling—that Cas feels down on himself and unloved (and I DO NOT think Cas BLAMES Dean for that at all—it takes a lot of willful ignorance about everything going on with his biological family to come to that conclusion) and Dean tries to FIX IT. He once again reiterates to Cas how much he cares about him—that he's family. He has NO IDEA that the words intended to make Cas feel better are going to send him down one of the most deranged spirals of unhinged decision-making ever (the Kelly shenanigans are WILD). I actually have a slightly different take on this, from the typical " it sent him off the deep end because he got 'brother-zoned'". I think it sent him off the deep end because it was the final *nail in the coffin in what Cas saw as a reversal of their relationship—where he isn't the guy who protects everyone anymore with his grace and his grand wings... that's Dean now, and Dean is saying that Cas, like Sam, is under his protection... and Castiel absolutely could not STAND that. He didn't need his romantic affections to be returned. What he wanted, more than anything—what he saw (in a rough draft of the script) when Jack showed him paradise, was Dean thanking him, and his powers returned to their former glory. Because Cas has unilaterally decided Dean's feelings, he chooses to love him like a saint, laying down his life, instead of being in a partnership, because he doesn't want to be someone Dean protects—not even in a partnership where they protect each other. He wants to be the sole protector.

All of that to say: Cas didn't learn how to feel unloved from Dean. TEXTUALLY. It is ON THE TIN. Saying that is literally the EXACT OPPOSITE of what Cas SAYS about Dean. He says he cared about the whole world because of DEAN. He cared because Dean's love was so captivatingly beautiful and inspiring and transcendent that it changed who Cas was inside to the core, and he fell fucking head over heels. "You changed me".

[marley-manson]

Hi :3 May I please request Star Trek and/or Doctor Who (whatever you prefer!) for that fandom ask game? :D

Thank you 💖 Gonna do both lol

Star Trek TOS:

my favorite female character

Few options but it's Uhura. Love the occasional moments she gets to shine <3

my favorite male character

McCoy! I love how emotion driven he is, I love how grumpy he is, love how brave he can be, love how dedicated to being a doctor he is, love his bickering with Spock and his scolding of Kirk all the time, he's just very loveable to me.

my favorite book/season/etc

I thiiiink I slightly prefer season 1, but seasons 1 and 2 are pretty equally matched.

my favorite episode (if its a tv show)

A Piece of the Action lol.

my favorite cast member

Honestly I'll never have an answer to this unless I did have an actual fandom-y interest in one of the actors, and I didn't for Trek.

my favorite ship

Spock/McCoy. I enjoy all the K/S subtext and vibes when I watch the show, but I'm way more interested in Spock/McCoy because they're just more fun and a more interesting dynamic. They're the ideal kind of ship to put into situations. Accidental marriage, only one bed, fake dating, sex pollen, every fanfic trope is more fun with Spock/McCoy.

a character I’d die defending

McCoy!!! Yes he's mean to Spock sometimes but have you considered that Spock is also mean to McCoy sometimes? Check and mate.

a character I just can’t sympathize with

Hmm, there's that one asshole captain in Doomsday that I wanted to strangle. Oh also the dude who created the nazi planet lol.

a character I grew to love

Idk, I didn't dislike any characters at the start. I guess McCoy grew into being my favourite over the course of the first season.

my anti otp

Spock/Uhura I guess. That man is gay, please stop putting him in het.

Doctor Who:

my favorite female character

Rose Tyler! I fell in love with her at first sight and continued to love her for the rest of her run and after.

my favorite male character

Ten. Nine is better written in terms of like... thematic coherency, but I fucking love Ten's downward spiral lol. I love to see the hero of a legacy family show try to kill himself 10 times, ruin his friends lives, decide to sacrifice the earth so he doesn't have to kill the absolutely abhorrent villain he's pathetically in love with, be jealous of his human clone who gets to peace the fuck out and live a relatively normal life, mope over genociding the time lords for 4 seasons only to genocide them again because it turns out he also did it on purpose the first time for good reason, and then die miserably.

That's my kind of entertainment. It would've been a little better if RTD had fully committed to Ten as responsible for all his own problems in the vein of Casanova which was clearly a trial run for Ten's arc, but I can understand why he probably felt he couldn't quite go that far since he is the hero of a legacy show RTD was trying to repopularize.

my favorite book/season/etc

Season 3. I think season 1 is the best written followed by season 2, but 3 is Peak Ten at his miserable suicidal asshole low. Genuinely love his toxic dynamic with Martha and how it led to her walking out on him with her head held high.

my favorite episode (if its a tv show)

Midnight.

my favorite cast member

I do finally have an answer and it's David Tennant because I did have a Tennant phase lol. Watched some of his other stuff, fangirled a little, good times.

my favorite ship

Despite what it seems I am actually answering this for Doctor Who as a whole and not just RTD's first run, so Three/Delgado is the answer. Followed by Ten/Simm and Ten II/Rose.

a character I’d die defending

It'll be a cold day in hell before I get involved in Doctor Who wank lol. It is by a wide margin the worst fandom I've ever been in for infighting, and I want no part of that. I will never defend a Doctor Who character, I will run away as fast as I can.

a character I just can’t sympathize with

If I watched more than 5 episodes of his run I'm sure I could easily answer this with a Moffat era character, but as is... I'm gonna say the time lords as a whole. Like not every time lord, and maybe I'd feel differently if I ever listened to the Gallifrey audios lol, but given that their society is a parody/satire of Britain, Rassilon is always a villain, and it was entirely in character for them to decide to destroy the entire universe to become gods or whatever... yeah fuck em. Hope the Doctor blows up Gallifrey again someday.

a character I grew to love

I feel like every character I love was love at first sight. I guess... Sam from the Eight books? I did find her a little annoying at first, but I really liked her in some of her later books, like Seeing I.

Ooh actually I should also mention Mickey, I love his arc.

my anti otp

Doctor/~*~*~Missy~*~*~ in that they literally took my otp and turned it into everything I hate in a shockingly gender essentialist package. Granted I've only watched the first two parter with Gomez but nothing I've heard about the rest has made me think it might change my mind. More the opposite.

ask meme

[bugstinytalks]

So I’ve been getting into journey to the west (Jttw) since I really enjoy the Lego Monkie kid series, and I noticed two things about the character the six eared macaque.

1 - some people said him and Sun Wukong were brothers. As far as I can tell there not at least not in Jttw, and in Monkie kid there sworn brothers.

2 - Macaque is not in the original Jttw as frequently as I expected, in fact he was there for only a brief time before getting killed. But there is a possibility he is the Macaque King (one of the seven fraternal sages) an ally Sun Wukong made early in the story.

In Lego Monkie kid Im pretty sure the seven fraternal sages are are Wukongs sworn brothers, since Demon bull king (DBK) is one of the seven fraternal brothers. I was wondering why in jttw it didn’t connect the macaque king and the six eared macaque and there are two options. 1 there different characters or 2 that it’s an inconsistency, the second options fairly likely since there are quite a few instances in jttw where if you think to hard the story doesn’t make sense.

Anyway Jttw is a fun read and if your looking for an easier way to absorb some of jttw, I’d suggest checking out an overly Saracastic production’s videos on YouTube.

[rainmustfallts4]

House of Lost Souls ◇ Day 2, Monday

⊶⊰Information⊱⊷ ⊶⊰From the Beginning⊱⊷ ⊶⊰Latest⊱⊷ ⊶⊰Index⊱⊷

———————-⊶⊰*⊱⊷———————-

“Hey, kid, how are you holding up?” Alex settled down beside me, offering me a friendly wave.

“Oh, um…” I scratched the side of my cheek as I glanced around the room at the other patients. “I’m… not too sure, actually…”

“It can be pretty overwhelming here at first.” She shook her head, leaning back in the chair. “These guys aren’t exactly easy to get along with, but they’re not so bad, you know.”

“I believe you. I’m just… not very good with people…”

“Oh, you’re one of those types, huh? Don’t worry, most of us keep to ourselves. So long as you don’t mess with them, they won’t mess with you. However -” She paused, leaning forward and lowering her voice. “If I were you, I’d avoid Blake.”

“Oh, um, okay!” Maybe I should have asked why, but I couldn’t bring myself to.

She pulled herself to her feet and, for a moment, she just observed me. “You want a hug?”

I was surprised by the question and I wanted to say no but… something held me back. I wasn’t fond of human contact, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t need the comfort. I guess she realized this because she smiled, pulling me up and into her arms.

She was much bigger and stronger than myself, her arms warm and comforting. I hesitantly put my arms around her.

“Thank you…”

“‘Course. If anyone messes with you, let me know and I’ll beat their ass!”

My talk with Alex made me feel better, lighter even. I was grateful to her for reaching out to me, and I kept it with me for the rest of the day. It gave me motivation to get out and actually do something productive.

I started out by taking care of the garden.

Then I worked on Yoga. It was getting easier to get into and maintain the poses. I actually felt quite proud of myself!

Dominic was nearby, using the telescope to gaze up at the sky. Suddenly, he let out a loud scream, nearly making me fall over. When I glanced over at him, he turned to run inside, screaming something about a meteor coming to kill him.

I blinked dumbly, watching as he made his way back inside. I glanced at the sky, seeing nothing. I even checked the telescope and still saw nothing. Had he imagined it? Or did he see something that just looked like a meteor?

With a sigh, I put my fingers through the chain-link fence, resting my forehead against the cool metal. The area near me is so pretty… it’s a shame I can’t actually enjoy it.

Shaking my head, I returned to yoga, trying to clear my head. The sooner I complete these tasks, the sooner I can get out of here!

After a few hours, I could finally tick off the first objective on the list. I’m making progress!

When I stepped into the bathroom, I stepped into a large puddle. As I often do, I assumed the worst, a look of disgust on my face. Then I realized it was just the sink – it was broken, sending water flying everywhere.

The shower was broken, too.

I frowned at Alexia who was washing her hands at the unbroken sink. “Um, should we tell someone about this…?”

She quirked a brow at me and I motioned toward the sink. Realization came upon her face, as if she hadn’t noticed it before that moment. “There’s no point. If that witch even takes thirty seconds to hear you out, it’ll go in one ear and out the other!”

“What do we do, then?”

“There’s a yearly maintenance check. It’s mandatory or the place gets shut down, so the witch won’t say no.”

“And when is that?”

She tapped her chin, looking up at the ceiling thoughtfully. “I think he came at the beginning of the year, so… maybe four months?” She shrugged again, patting me on the shoulder before leaving the bathroom.

I frowned at the broken sink. How can they do this? How can they let them live like this? This feels more like a prison…

I tried to clean up a little in the bathroom, but it was pointless with the sink broken so I just headed back outside to enjoy the weather.

It was so much nicer than the stuffy, mildewy air inside. Alex was playing basketball, easily beating everyone else on the court.

Despite her big size, she moved gracefully, dodging the others when they tried to tackle her. I guess Dwayne forgot they were playing basketball and not football…

My first day here, a woman came and made us lunch. The BLTs were excellent! I quickly learned that it was a one-time thing. More specifically, Rhys explained that she only comes once every three months just to ensure everyone is still alive. I was just lucky enough to arrive on the same day as her.

Other than that, we are forced to have cheap yogurt, cereal without milk, or granola from a cheap cooler that doesn’t even make the food cold. The yogurt was greek yogurt so it was gross, the cereal was hard enough to break your teeth, and the granola tasted like cardboard. No, actually I think cardboard would be nicer.

I know Alex told me to stay away from him, but… it felt rude to just ignore him when he started talking to me. He seemed nice, anyway.

“Hey, kid. How’re you settling in?”

“Oh, uh… it’s a big change…”

He grinned and I couldn’t help but notice how sharp his teeth looked. “For sure. Took me a while to adjust. You never really get used to it, you just kinda… stop caring.”

“That sounds really sad…”

He shrugged. “What’re you gonna do? We’re all trapped here.”

“But… if you complete your assigned tasks, don’t we get out?”

“You’d think so, wouldn’t ya?” he grinned again, but it seemed forced. “Look, I don’t want to take away your hope, but… don’t work yourself too hard, kid.”

“What do you mean?”

He chose not to answer, leaving me with more questions that I liked.

“Blake, you bitchy little leech!” Dwayne slammed the door open, looking pissed as he stomped inside the rec room.

I jumped in surprise, wide eyes looking over at him. Is he… glowing? I rubbed my eyes, wondering if I was hallucinating, but the glow didn’t disappear.

Blake rolled his eyes. “Stop barking like a little bitch, you’re scaring the kid.”

“Don’t act as if you actually care about someone other than yourself!” he growled back, eyes flashing with rage.

I swallowed hard, starting to feel very anxious as the two continued to argue, getting into each other’s faces. I was afraid they would start fighting and I wanted to be nowhere near them when they did!

I quickly escaped the room, my heart pounding inside my chest.

“Calm down,” I told myself softly. “It’s okay. You’re okay.”

A couple of meditation seats had been placed in the hallway outside of the bedrooms. I have never used one before and had only meditated once when I was a child – and that’s only because my favorite cartoon character did it. To my surprise, it did help calm me down.

Once calm, I headed outside to check on the garden. The honey was ready to harvest and it looked quite good, but I knew I needed to put it in the collection box. Funds for the asylum are far more important than honey for my own stomach.

I decided to try my hand at flower arranging. Bitches love flowers, so I figured it would be a good way to make money.

While doing so, the outside grill caught on fire! I didn’t even know we had a grill… Thankfully Alex, Dwayne, and Dominic were on top of it. They put the fire out quickly, but the grill was toast.

The nerves I had worked so hard to calm were a bit frayed again because of the fire, so I headed back into the rec room. Only Junior was inside, working on a cross-stitch pattern. Beside the couch sat a basket of knitting supplies. I had always wanted to try knitting, I just never got around to doing so.

“Excuse me… can I sit with you…?”

Junior glanced up at me and nodded. “Sure.” His voice was… strange. I’m not sure how quite to describe it, but it seemed to… echo, I guess?

Shaking my head, I grabbed some knitting needles before settling down beside him. Together, we worked in silence to create something. It wasn’t an awkward silence like I’m used to, instead, it was a comfortable one.

After a few minutes of silence, Junior suddenly exclaimed, “Hey, look at this! Isn’t it cute?”

I glanced over to see the progress he had made. “Oh my grim, that’s adorable! It’s Yamachan, right?”

He nodded, offering me a grin. “Yamachan is my favorite character. I grew up admiring him! My dream is to one day meet him.”

“I hope you get the chance to…”

“Me too.”

Junior went to bed shortly after that, leaving me alone in the rec room. I continued to work on my knitting for a while until I started to grow tired myself. Just as I got up to leave, Blake entered the room.

I offered him a friendly, awkward smile before attempting to move past him but he blocked the way. I looked at him with confusion, realizing that he looked as if he were in pain.

“I’m really sorry about this, kid.”

“What are you -“

He held his hands up, a green energy emitting from them and shooting toward me. In an instance, my body felt numb. I was still aware of my surroundings, but I couldn’t move! I tried to speak, but my voice failed me. What’s happening to me?

“I’m sorry…” he repeated against as he reached for me, tilting my head to the side. My heart raced with confusion and fear, then I felt something sharp against the side of my neck.

A gasp escaped my lips, realization flooding me. He’s a vampire!

After what felt like an hour of him drinking my plasma, he finally pulled back, releasing a satisfied sigh. “It’s been ages since I got a drink! My, your plasma is just lovely.”

I still couldn’t speak or move. My body felt heavy and, despite how hard I tried, I couldn’t keep my eyes open. One second I was struggling to stay away and the next, I was out cold.

I don’t know how long I was out for, but I awoke to the beautiful melody of a guitar. To my surprise, the one playing was Blake. I pretended to still be asleep as soon as I saw him, hoping he hadn’t noticed.

He continued to play for a while before finally sighing, putting the guitar down, and leaving the room. I didn’t move, listening to the sound of his footsteps fading down the hall. Even after it went quiet, I stayed still, scared he would come back.

Finally, after what felt like hours, I slowly pushed myself up. My arms trembled, my body heavy and weak. So this is what it feels like to be drank from… It certainly wasn’t a good feeling and I didn’t want to experience it again. I started to feel dizzy so I sat down at the desk.

I was scared to go out of the rec room, scared I would run into him again and I knew I didn’t have the energy to run from him. I took out my journal and began to jot down what had happened, my hand trembling as I did so. This made my handwriting messy and a bit difficult to read. It’s not like anyone is ever gonna see it, so I guess it doesn’t matter.

The more I wrote, the more my emotions came bubbling up to the surface. I just felt so damn overwhelmed and alone. I wanted to go home, to see my dad!

My dad… he probably hates me. That filthy woman has gotten her claws far too deep into him. I never thought I’d see the day he chose a woman over me, but… I guess I brought this on myself. I haven’t exactly been the best child. Actually, I’ve been a pretty terrible child. Most parents just want their kids to grow up well and then move out on their own at 18.

I overstayed my welcome and ruined his life by doing so.

I cried for a while, covering my mouth so my sobs weren’t too loud. I didn’t want to explain to anyone how I was feeling. It felt too private and I didn’t want to be a burden. Everyone here has their own problems to deal with, I doubt they care about my own.

I wiped away my tears with my shirt, annoyed that my glasses were now fogged up from them. Surely enough time has passed, right? I was careful as I stepped out into the hall, biting my lip every time my shoes squeaked on the linoleum floor. The asylum was quiet, most of the other residents asleep or locked away in their rooms.

I held my breath when I passed by Blake’s room before nearly jogging toward my own. Thankfully, these doors have locks on them! I locked it tight, putting the chair up against the handle just to be safe.

I felt so exhausted, drained both emotionally and physically, that I fell asleep before I could even get into bed properly.

[magicshopaholic]

hey, do you read fic at all? i was wondering if you had any recs, i feel like i don't see you interact with fic a lot on here! i love your stories, so wondered what are your favorite authors too :]

Hello! The short answer to this is yes, but it comes with the caveat that I haven’t read much lately, primarily because I have no time but also because now that my characters are getting more and more fleshed out with every fic, reading other fanfic feels like my members are cheating on their OCs 😕 (I read this really good Namjoon fic where he met the reader at a party, and spent a whole week imagining Namjoon cheating on Kaya with that Y/N and it kind of killed me)

Having said that, I still do read fics when I can, definitely those that don’t interfere in my head with my OCs. I’m joining collabs and book clubs as much as I can so that I read more; but in the meantime I’d love to recommend some of my favourite fics and authors to you and any other readers:

(Please read the warnings on each fic before proceeding)

1. Poetry of the Stars by @jjiimin: This is the best fic I have read my entire life (barring one legendary series in the HP fandom - iykyk) and I honestly have nothing else to say about it. Riley has unfortunately deactivated her Tumblr account but I’m so glad I got to tell her how incredible her story was before she did so, so this is my number one. It’s 25K+ words iirc and was one of the first fics I read in the fandom and I just read it all in one go because I couldn’t stop.

(Also a favourite is Irresistible by the same author but I unfortunately don’t have a link to it)

2. @sahmfanficbts: There’s no fic mentioned here because I recommend Sam’s entire masterlist. She’s one of my all time favourite authors in the fandom and I have read and will read every single BTS fic she ever posts. Every fic is so immersive and every character is so deeply developed that they just stay with me and I find myself thinking about them at random times. Just beautiful, fantastic writing.

3. The Rich Man’s Crochet Club series by @kpopfanfictrash: Funny, quippy dialogue is my absolute favourite thing and this series has some of the best combination of humour and heart. Shanna’s works are pretty popular so you may have already checked this one out but I’m gonna recommend it anyway. (I remember coming on anon to gush about it because I was shy af, but I absolutely loved it, Shanna :))

4. Four Seven Eight by @jiminrings: This is the one I’ve read most recently and I’ve had it in my drafts since then so that I don’t forget to write a review because it deserves a great one. So here’s my apology to Hannah for taking so long to do it 🤓 but this is an amazing series, full of angst and hope and has my recommendation for sure.

5. For The Crown by @chimknj: I don’t read mxm fics, particularly mxm smut, but there was no way on earth I was going to pass on this one. Gina and I share an obsession with A Song of Ice and Fire (and I mean OBSESSION - we talk about it 24x7) and the premise of this fic was so compelling and so exciting to discuss that the only thing better than that was actually reading it. The way Gina has written this - I was transported to Westeros instantly. Everything is subtle and nuanced and I found myself connecting with every single character (also Kingsguard!Namjoon was not something I knew I needed). Idk if she’s planning on writing future parts but if she is… fuck, I’m so excited I can’t even talk about it.

6. A Silent Heart Still Beats by @akinnie75: This is another fic I have in my drafts because its review deserves my entire attention. It deals with some difficult topics but is so sad yet hopeful. The OC is such a beautiful character inside and out and this doesn’t usually happen to me with fics, but she actually changed my life and taught me how to rise above, be compassionate and forgive. I won’t give away anymore but this is just a gorgeous, gorgeous fic.

7. Just Practice by @lamourche: I can’t BELIEVE I’ve finally found this fic again!!! I read it once and then lost it (now I realise it’s because the author has seemingly removed their masterlist) but I’d commented on it from my main blog. It is one of my favourite fics of all time: it reads like a college indie movie or like a Sally Rooney novel. I was crying at the end but I couldn’t even put my finger on what it was which just meant that it was the entire vibe of the story rather than a specific scene. It breaks my heart that I’ll never get to read this again but the author has all my appreciation and gratitude for writing it.

These are some recs off the top of my head that have stayed with me and I’ll probably add to this if I think of more. A huge thank you to all these authors for their wonderful work - and thanks to you too, anon, for the question. It felt great to go back to old fics and give a shout out to such talented writers <3

[sergeantsporks]

Gilded Family

Rating: Teen and Up, Gen

Ch 29/?: Infection

Ch 1, Ch 2, Ch 3, Ch 4, Ch 5, Ch 6 , Ch 7, Ch 8, Ch 9, Ch 10, Ch 11, Ch 12, Ch 13, Ch 14, Ch 15, Ch 16, Ch 17,  Ch 18, Ch 19, Ch 20, Ch 21, Ch 22, Ch 23, Ch 24, Ch 25, Ch 26, Ch 27, Ch 28

In which none of the previous golden guards or wittebro died, actually, they're all fine and living happily together as one big dysfunctional family

Ao3

“Sa-am,” Evelyn sang, sweeping into the lab. Phoenix followed in her wake, ducking behind her to stay out of Petro’s glare radius.

Sam set down a rat with a glyph attached to it that scampered away immediately. “Hello, Mother Dearest. What is it that you need?”

“I didn’t say that I needed something.”

“You get musical when you’re going to ask me for something. What is it?”

“Mm. Yes.” Evelyn nodded a couple of times. “Now that you mention it. I could use a transportation glyph, please and thank you. Also perhaps you could come with us so that we can get back, and because my magic is a wee bit depleted from the barrier?”

“Ah. Just give me a—” Sam reached down, patted the table where the rat had been, and cursed. “Never mind. Give me a now. May I ask where it is that we’re headed?”

Evelyn glanced at Petro. “Not in front of him.”

“Who am I going to tell, Mummy Beloved?” Petro sighed, tilting his chair back on its legs, “I am to be left alone, without a single soul to talk t—” His chair tilted back too far and he crashed backwards. “Hm.”

“Good,” Evelyn said sharply, “It’ll give you time alone to think about what you’ve done.”

She stalked back out, Sam scurrying behind her. Phoenix turned to go, but Petro cleared his throat. “Little bird, I’ve got a favor to ask. I know you don’t trust me, and you have no reason to, but this is very important to me, so please at least consider my request.”

Despite every warning bell ringing in his head, Phoenix stayed. “What?”

Petro’s face split into a grin. “Bring me back a souvenir?”

Phoenix sighed, and he picked up Petro’s chair, setting him upright and checking to make sure his bonds hadn’t been loosened in the fall. “You know, when I was in your memories, I heard someone singing a lullaby. I don’t know who they were, but do you think they’d be proud of who you are now?”

Petro’s eyebrows went down in an angry v, and all the spiteful humor on his face gave way to rage. He lunged forward against his bonds, snapping his teeth at Phoenix, who jumped backwards to dodge the attack.

“That’s none of your business,” he snarled, “You don’t know what you’re talking about, so just shut up!”

Phoenix backed out of the room, shutting the door on a growling, slavering Petro. He thought he’d seen the worst of Petro, but the hot hate in Petro’s eyes had been far deeper than before, even worse than when Petro had tried to kill him. Whoever could make Petro snap like that would have to wait, though. Evelyn and Sam were already outside, drawing in the dirt.

Before Phoenix could reach the door, Mole slid in front, crossing his arms. He held out a leaf to Phoenix, stained with green mud he must have found on the garden fence.

Phoenix hissed in. “It’s—I’m going to tell them Mole, I just…”

Mole shook his head, taking Phoenix’s arm and tugging him back further into the house.

Phoenix gingerly extracted himself from Mole’s grip. “I can’t. I can’t make them stop to deal with this, not when we’re so close. It’ll take too much time.”

Mole sighed, chewing on his lip and looking at the door, and Evelyn, and then back to Phoenix.

Phoenix crouched slightly so that he was on Mole’s eye level. “I’ll tell them when we get back. I’ll play it safe. No unnecessary risks. I promise.”

Mole threw his hands up in the air and stormed away, shutting his room door harder than necessary, but not hard enough for it to slam. Phoenix sighed.

I guess I’d be pretty mad at him if he was sick and wouldn’t tell anyone.

At least he could be sure that Mole wouldn’t tell anyone.

Phoenix joined the others outside just as Evelyn snatched the arm of a passing adult. “Marcus. I’m going out. You’re in charge of the barrier while I’m gone. It should just be a few hours, then I’ll take over again. If you think your magic is starting to fade, ask Aurelia to use hers.”

Marcus nodded, and the glow around the fence took on a different hue; still blue, but a more greenish blue than Evelyn’s magic.

Sam finished his glyph and dusted his hands off. “All set! Where is it we’re off to?”

“The head.”

Sam coughed. “The head. You mean where the Collector is? You mean that place that’s crawling with their spies? That place Phoenix barely got out of alive? That head?”

“That’s the one. I know it’s not exactly a vacation, but that’s where the last Grimwalker is, so that’s where we need to go.”

“Oh boy. Does Dad know?”

Evelyn glowered. “I don’t need your father’s permission.”

Sam held his hands up in surrender. “I didn’t say you did! It just seems like. Maybe. Perhaps. Going on a very dangerous rescue mission to a very dangerous place. Might be the sort of thing we discuss with the whole family? Instead of rushing off half-baked? At the very least, we should have Auric on standby?”

Evelyn paced back and forth. “We don’t have time for a lengthy family debate over the risks! Every second they spend up there is another second that the Collector might find them, or worse, kill them without realizing!”

“Okay, okay!” Sam hissed in. “Sorry, one last thing… no offense, Phoenix, but are you sure you’re up for this?”

Phoenix shoved his hands back in his pockets. “I’ll be fine. The situation’s not ideal, but it’s never going to be.”

“Sam,” Evelyn pleaded, “I’d do this on my own, but my magic is shot. Phoenix is the one who figured out where they are, so we need him there to guide us. We need to get in and out quickly, and only you can help us do that. Are you going to take us there?”

Sam’s mouth set in a firm line. “Well. I’ve already got the glyph drawn. Why not? All aboard that are coming aboard.”

Sam and Evelyn stepped into the circle, and Sam tapped the glyph. Golden light rushed around Phoenix, and when it faded, he faced a familiar archway, glowing eerily in the light cast by the Archive House hovering thousands of feet over them.

Phoenix’s heart pounded in his chest, and he gingerly touched the shattered remains of the portal door.

Are you there, Jason?

Are you still safe?

Evelyn opened her bag, passing out concealment stones. Phoenix saw potion bottles hidden deep in her bag, clinking gently together with her movement, but she quickly buckled the bag back up, hiding them from sight. Phoenix slipped the concealment stone over his head, and the magic drew lines around his joints. His clothes popped in the darkness, now more colorful and flowy, like a puppet’s.

“Where next, Phoenix?”

Phoenix peered out of the decimated lab, and immediately stepped back, head spinning. Outside, the ground gave way to a straight drop into unending darkness, the bridge long gone. “Down there.”

“Eugh.” Sam pulled out a notepad, drawing three new glyphs. “Feather-fall,” he explained, handing them out, “I don’t think taking the stairs is an option anymore.”

Evelyn immediately jumped over the edge of the precipice. Sam grabbed Phoenix’s arm. “Hey.”

“Hey?”

Sam nodded towards the edge. “Mom’s… not in the most logical headspace right now. Make sure she doesn’t do anything stupid?”

“Me?”

“Yeah, you. Once we find wherever he kept us stored, I’m going to hang back and start the return glyph.” Sam glanced up at the sky. “Being this close to the archive house gives me the creeps. I want to get out of here as soon as possible.”

Phoenix shuffled closer to the edge of the drop, but didn’t jump. “You’re not hanging back to try and catch a puppet, are you?”

“Well, I wasn’t, but I’m thinking about it now.” Sam gave him a little push. “Just help me keep her safe. Go!”

Phoenix took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and jumped before he could think too hard about it. He clutched the feather-fall glyph close to his chest, opening his eyes and activating it just before hitting the ground. He staggered forward, and Evelyn gripped his forearms to keep him steady.

“Easy, Phoenix. You’re alright.”

Sam tapped down gently next to them, landing as gracefully as a fairy. He held a small light glyph in one hand, gently illuminating the skull around them. “Oog. I did not miss this place.” His voice echoed in the cavern, and he kicked at something glimmering on the ground. “He never cleaned up down here, did he?”

Phoenix recognized the object Sam had kicked, and his stomach churned. Golden masks littered the ground, some accompanied by bloodstained scraps of white fabric, others by a spaulder or a torn-up breastplate.

Evelyn’s hold on Phoenix tightened. “We were this close the whole time?!”

“What is this place?” Phoenix asked. He could guess, and something pressed at the corners of his mind, a sense of familiarity, but the others seemed much more familiar with it.

“Uncle Pip’s dumping ground,” Sam grumbled “He dropped a lot of us down here once he was done with us.”

“It was always the first place Caleb and I checked,” Evelyn whispered, picking up the mask Sam had kicked. “We’d try to catch you before you hit the bottom—like poor Alex did. Not everyone ended up here, but…” She turned the mask over in her hands. “This is where we found you, Phoenix.”

Memories of both being dragged across the bridge and dragging bodies himself warred for dominance in Phoenix’s mind—not that he’d ever thought about or remembered this place before today. The memory of Belos pushing his lifeless body over the edge was faint, barely more than a feeling of déjà vu overshadowed by the pain of his injuries, but watching himself fall, while clearer… didn’t even feel important or worth thinking about.

Which was almost worse.

Evelyn shook her head, tucking the mask into her bag. “If where he made you is really just a few feet away… that’s just twisted.”

“Not to mention ridiculous,” Sam added, “What did he think happened to the bodies when he came down here to get a new kid? Did he think Grimwalker bodies just disintegrate? Okay, wait, actually, if Dad rescued all of us, then he never had a corpse for long. He probably did think that. Fascinating, he had a completely warped understanding of decomposition because of us. I would love to pick apart his brain if he were still alive.”

“Yes, incredibly interesting,” Evelyn agreed impatiently, “Phoenix?”

Phoenix took a deep breath. Okay. Which way?

He started to walk, letting his feet pick the direction without any thought. He passed a few more masks, gleaming dully in the dim light from Sam’s light glyph. Finally, a cave yawned out at them from the darkness, and Phoenix stopped.

“There,” he whispered.

Evelyn’s hand found his in the darkness. “Let’s bring them home,” she whispered.

Sam drew more light glyphs, wafting them into the room. Phoenix stared at three vats filled to the brim with dirt, the fingers on his free hand twitching and clawing as if he were buried and needed to dig his way out. Tubes fed into the dirt, and Phoenix knew in the back of his head that they should be filled with glowing green liquid. But the whole room felt… lopsided, somehow, and whatever the tubes had been hooked to before, they now lay disconnected on the ground.

A small hand stuck out of one stone vat, and Phoenix pointed with a squeak. Evelyn pulled him to it, but neither of them made any move to dig it up.

“Are they still alive?” Phoenix gingerly reached out—the hand wouldn’t even be the length of his pinkie finger when stretched out.

The moment his finger brushed the tiny fingers, they twitched and tightened, curling around his index finger. Evelyn gasped and immediately started to dig, shoveling away great handfuls of dirt. Phoenix joined her, his free hand digging around the grimwalker’s arm with practiced movements, as if he’d been doing this his whole life, even though some part of him said that he’d only ever watched, and another part of him whispered that he’d only ever dug from the opposite side.

A small face started to appear in the soil, chubby with baby fat and smeared with dirt. Evelyn seized a heavy white cloak hanging on a peg, wrapping the little grimwalker up. They weren’t quite an infant—if Phoenix had to guess, they were a year or two old.

Evelyn gently brushed dirt off of the sleeping grimwalker’s face. “Hey, little guy,” she said softly, “I know a bunch of people who are going to be so happy to meet you. And we’re going to take good care of you.” She gently kissed the top of the grimwalker’s head, then handed them to Phoenix. “Here—can you hold them for a moment? Mind their head, I think they’re big enough that it shouldn’t be too floppy but it’s been… a while.”

“Ack—” Phoenix held the baby like it might explode, cradling their head in one hand. “Um—Evelyn, I don’t know if I should—I’ve never held a—what if I drop—”

“You’ll be fine,” she said briskly, “You won’t hurt them.” She reached into her bag, pulling out potion bottles and holding them between her fingers. “Go wait outside with Sam.”

“Why? What are those? What are you going to do?”

“I’m going to burn this miserable hole down to the ground so that no one can ever use it again,” Evelyn growled, “Go.”

Her magic gently pushed Phoenix out of the cave, and she threw the first potion, destroying one of the stone vats with an almighty boom and a crack of splitting stone.

“Yep,” Sam said in a resigned voice, “That’s what I was afraid of. Well! As long as she’s being safe about it! We’re far enough down that the Collector won’t notice. I think.”

The grimwalker in Phoenix’s arms squirmed, reaching up towards his face and batting at his nose. “Mrgh?” they gurgled.

“Ohhhhhhhhh boy—” Phoenix bounced the baby up and down the way he’d seen caretakers at the orphanage do. “Okay, go back to sleep, go back to—”

Another boom, and this time, the machine in the corner exploded, sending shards outwards. Phoenix’s arms started to ache, and although the flickering of the explosions made every rock and shadow seem strange and eerie, he could clearly see that the blackish green veins had reached his fingertips and were starting to web outwards, turning his nails black.

Crack

Phoenix shook his head back and forth as if that would dislodge the feeling of something slithering under his skin, making his arms itch and crawl and… bubble.

“Phoenix?” Sam asked, “Are you okay?”

“She needs to stop,” Phoenix whispered, “She needs to stop destroying it, she needs to—” He deposited the grimwalker baby in Sam’s arms before he could drop them, his arms trembling uncontrollably. The baby frowned, reaching towards Phoenix with little grabby hands.

“It took so long, she can’t…” Phoenix pressed his arms against his stomach, doubling over. “Stop it. Stop it, stop it—”

“Mooooooooooooom? We need to leave!” Sam yelled somewhere in the distance, “Something’s wrong with Phoenix—”

“Just a little bit more,” Evelyn called back, “I’m almost done—”

“Stop,” Phoenix rasped. His arms didn’t just itch anymore, they burned, shifting and tearing and breaking and reforming over and over and over.

“Mom!” Sam yelped, “Forget the cave! You’ve done enough! We need to go now!

Golden light rushed around Phoenix, and something inside of him whispered to take it, to consume it, to dig his claws (what claws, he’d never had claws) into the light and seize it for his own.

The light faded on its own, turning to red trees, and Phoenix’s legs wobbled.

Evelyn reached out to catch his arms, but yanked her hands away at the last second, her mouth dropping open in horror. Phoenix fell to his knees, too sluggish to break his fall with his hands, and crashed forward on his forearms. His arms showed no sign of flesh or skin, just oozing, pulsing mud that shifted and swirled, revealing white bone and covering it up just as quickly.

“What—is—happening—” Phoenix groaned.

Evelyn grabbed Sam’s collar, hauling him and the baby grimwalker backwards away from Phoenix and shoving him towards the house. “Get your father. Now.”

Sam scrambled away, calling for help. Evelyn approached Phoenix slowly, holding her hands up.  “Hey—stick with me. When did it start getting worse?”

Phoenix touched his forehead to the ground as the mud ate at his upper arm, slinking towards his shoulders. “Hnnnngh—”

“Okay, okay, let me just—” Her hand touched his shoulder lightly, then flicked down to the mud. She immediately drew back with a yelp, shaking her hand, and eyed his arms with a mixture of horror, worry, and… disgust. “It’s like…”

“Belos,” Phoenix grated out. He pushed up to his feet, blinking back stars from his vision. “It’s like Belos, it’s—”

His curse

The attacks

Is that going to happen to me?!

“Phoenix—” Evelyn started, but Phoenix was already backing away from her.

“Stay back—I don’t want to hurt you.”

She faltered, her face heartbroken. But she didn’t chase him when he ran, stumbling through the forest. He had to get as far away from the house as he could before this lashed out—it had already hurt Evelyn, he couldn’t let it attack anyone else.

Phoenix’s arm brushed against a tree, and a jolt of pain rushed up his spine as a low branch pushed right through the mud, touching bone. He stumbled to the side with a howl, clutching his arms close to his chest.

A solitary raindrop dripped from the sky, tracing down his cheek.

Rain had never bothered Phoenix before. It had never scalded him the way it did normal witches. But now the boiling water hissed into his arms, dragging tracks in his arms and dripping muddy water from his fingertips.

And it burned.

Phoenix ran, this time looking for shelter from the rain, any shelter. He tripped, skidding down a sharp bank, and finally crawled under a fallen tree that created a small hollow. He curled into a ball, pressing his arms tightly against himself to keep them from exploding outwards. The mud had stopped trying to crawl further up his arms, leaving burns behind. It didn’t… settle, exactly. It just swirled more sluggishly, crawling and migrating around his lower arms.

Phoenix scooted further back into his hollow to stay away from the rain. At least Caleb and Evelyn couldn’t come looking for him in this weather—and he doubted they’d ask a grimwalker to find him when he looked like their worst nightmare.

“What am I supposed to do?” he whispered out loud. Every memory he had of Belos lashing out (and a few that he didn’t remember himself) with his curse played through his mind. He’d always consumed a palisman’s magic right after, but the thought made Phoenix sick to his stomach. He couldn’t do that. Not knowing how Hunter felt about his palisman, not knowing what loyal creatures they were.

What had he been expecting with this infection? That it would just make his arms ache? That his wounds would just keep spitting out cursed mud forever? That he could see some of Belos’ memories when it was convenient and not face any other consequences? Of course there was a price. There was always a price, always some exchange for any information or benefit when it came to Belos.

The rain slowed, but didn’t stop, still trickling down and making the air into a steamy fog. Phoenix’s stomach rumbled. Right. He hadn’t actually stopped to have breakfast this morning, and it was probably well past noon by now.

Had Belos ever eaten anything? Could he? Would Phoenix be able to stomach food now? Or would he be forced to eat a palisman or starve at some point?

A branch snapped, and Phoenix’s head snapped up, his ears twitching to locate the sound. He didn’t call out—anything that could be out in a rainstorm was bound to be a predator looking for its next meal.

Maybe it would be better for something to just eat me now before this gets worse and I hurt someone, he thought bleakly. Tears of exhaustion and pain blurred Phoenix’s vision, but he blinked them back, not letting them fall. I’m sorry, Darius. Jason. Hunter. I can’t…

“Phoenix?” Caleb’s voice called, “Phoooooooooeeeeeeeeeeeeeeniiiiiiiiiiiiiiix! Are you out here?”

The ortet emerged from the steam, holding an umbrella over his head. Even with the barrier between him and the rain, tiny pockmark burns dotted his arms and face, and his clothing steamed. A pang of guilt tore at Phoenix—he’d come looking, even in the rain, and he’d gotten hurt.

“Go away,” Phoenix choked, “Just… go home.”

“Are you coming with me?”

Was he crazy?! “I can’t.”

Caleb shrugged. “Then I’m not going home either.”

He took another step closer, and Phoenix curled further into the hollow. “Stay back!”

Caleb halted in his tracks, holding his hands up as best he could while still gripping the umbrella. “Hey—it’s okay,” he shushed, edging closer, “I’m not gonna hurt you, it’s okay.”

“No—stay away—I don’t want to hurt you!”

“Then don’t,” Caleb said simply, taking another slow, steady step towards him.

Phoenix shook his head. How could he not understand?! He’d seen Belos, he’d fought Belos; why was he still coming closer, knowing what might happen?! “I don’t want to—but the curse, Belos’ attacks—”

“Oh,” Caleb sighed, “I see.” He reached the hollow, ducking inside and kneeling next to Phoenix. Phoenix’s heart thudded in his chest, and he pulled his arms even closer to himself, keeping them away from Caleb.

“You should run before… before…”

Caleb cupped Phoenix’s face in his hands, his thumb wiping away a streak of dirt. “Hey. Listen to me. Phillip didn’t hurt people because of the curse.” He shook his head. “Phillip hurt people because he wanted to. And Phoenix…” Caleb smiled gently, brushing Phoenix’s hair out of his face. “I’m not scared of you.”

A sob burst out of Phoenix’s throat, and he fell forward, burying his face in Caleb’s shoulder. Caleb wrapped his arms around Phoenix without hesitation, one hand cradling his head and the other resting on his back. Phoenix clutched him like a lifeline—his hands had turned to claws, so he stretched his fingers out flat to keep from tearing Caleb’s skin.

“I don’t—want to end up—like him—” he cried, tears still pouring from his eyes, “I don’t want to—” Every lie and trick, every harsh word, everything he’d done wrong in the last month pounded against his head, screaming that it was already too late, and this was just his body finally showing what he really was.

“You won’t,” Caleb said fiercely, “I won’t let that happen. I promise, you won’t turn into him. I promise, I promise, I promise.”

“It’s already started,” Phoenix stammered, “I’m sorry, I should have told you. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have hidden it, but I’m seeing his memories, and—and getting upset over things he’d get upset over that I shouldn’t be getting upset over. And I lied to you and Evelyn about my arms, and I lied to the Collector to trick him into letting us go, and I lied to King to get him to come with me, and… and now my arms-!”

The mud started to move again, dripping away from him, and Phoenix hid his face in Caleb’s shoulder rather than see the white bone and the oozing, burning mud. He heaved in a shaky breath. You’re acting like a child, a voice in his head scolded, but Caleb felt warm and solid, and he didn’t want to let go.

“Okay. Okay.” Caleb rubbed a slow circle on his back. “Okay. Hey—hey, I don’t know why this is happening, or you’re seeing his memories. I don’t. But they don’t make you him, not any more than Hunter is Belos because he went into Belos’ mind and saw his memories.”

“But the Collector. And King. The way I lied and tricked them…” Phoenix shuddered, his clawed hands clenching into fists and opening over and over. “I knew it was like him, I knew it was exactly something Belos would do. And I knew that the Collector had been tricked before. But I still… I still…”

“You were scared,” Caleb said gently, “You were facing something much more powerful than you, and the only way out was to use your head. Lying isn’t always the wrong thing to do, Phoenix. Sometimes you have to lie, to protect yourself and the people you love.”

“And how do you know Belos wasn’t just scared?” Phoenix challenged, “Maybe he thought he had to lie, too.”

Caleb heaved a deep sigh and slowly sat back on his heels, ending the hug. “Phillip was scared,” he admitted, “Phillip was scared of a lot of things. He was scared of dying. He was scared of losing me. But most of all, Phillip was scared of what he didn’t understand.”

“Then how?” Phoenix asked, his voice cracking, “If he lied because he was scared too, then how is it any different?”

Caleb went very still and stayed a little bit too quiet for just a little bit too long. Outside, the rain came to a stop, leaving just lingering wisps of steam. “I think,” Caleb said slowly, “that Phillip let his fear of what he didn’t understand turn into hatred.” He closed his eyes, shaking his head slightly like he was admitting something to himself. “I encouraged him to turn it into hatred.” Caleb opened his eyes again, his shoulders hunching just ever-so-slightly, as if he were scared Phoenix would be angry at him. “I thought it was the right thing at the time, but…” he sighed. “That’s besides the point. Fear can help keep us safe. But not everything we don’t understand is out to get us. And that is something Phillip never learned. Something he didn’t want to learn.”

Phoenix tucked his arms in close again. “I… don’t understand.”

“Phillip chose to hate the things he didn’t understand instead of trying to find out more about them. And he went out of his way to keep doing so and to keep lying, and he kept on hating the unknown so badly that when the time came… he ended up causing one of his worst fears to come to pass rather than letting go of the fear that turned into hate.”

Caleb twisted his hands around each other. “I can’t say for sure where the line lies,” he said finally, “But I think perhaps Phillip crossed it when he sought out the unknown in order to destroy it, rather than just protecting himself when something harmful came his way. And most of all, I think he crossed that line when he was given obvious signs that he was hurting innocent people, and doing the wrong thing, and he chose to ignore them and keep going instead of changing.”

“How do you know I’m not doing the same thing?”

“Phoenix, would you lie to… King? Yes, King. Would you lie to King again?”

Phoenix shook his head dully. Even without knowing how King had reacted when he’d found out—he should have told him the whole truth from the beginning. Let him make his own decisions.

“And the Collector—”

“They’re not what everyone thinks,” Phoenix said in a rush, “They’re just a kid who wanted friends, and I was so desperate to get home that I ruined any chance I had, but if I hadn’t lied to him and tried to run, if I’d tried something else, anything else, I think I could have—I could have—” he stopped, eying Caleb. The ortet wore a small, knowing smile on his face. “What? Why are you smiling like that?”

“You took time to understand the Collector,” Caleb said gently.

“He’s still terrifying. Even more now that they probably hate me.”

“But…?”

“But not bad,” Phoenix admitted, “I don’t want to hurt them. And I don’t think I have to lie to them—I shouldn’t lie to him.”

“There you go. Still think you’re just like Belos?”

Phoenix held up his dripping arms. “But if I do start to…what if I start to act like him, and I don’t even realize?”

“You have me. And you have Evelyn. And you have all your siblings.” Caleb gave him a crooked grin. “I think we’re kind of experts on what Belos acts like. If you’re really worried… just trust us. We’re not perfect. And we make mistakes. But we’ll help you the best we can.”

He stood up, offering Phoenix a hand. “They’re all worried about you. Let’s go home?”

Phoenix reached up to take his hand, but before he did, he heard a rustle and a snap, and the hiss of magic. A glowing net shot out of the bushes, slamming into Phoenix.

“Got it!” a voice cheered from the bush. Two familiar masks and white cloaks popped up, dirty and dented, but still undeniably coven scouts. “Urgh, what is that thing?! I’ve never seen anything like it!”

Phoenix tore at the net, his throat closing up and his breath seizing in his chest. “Get it off—get it off, get it—”

“Stay calm—” Caleb knelt down next to the net, flicking out a knife and sawing at the magical ropes. “I’ve got you, Phoenix, you’re going to be o—”

One of the scouts yanked Caleb back, throwing him to the side. “Back off! Our kill!”

Phoenix strained and kicked to get away, but the net held, and the more he struggled, the tighter the net got, digging into his skin. His arms started to shift again, the cursed mud sliding in and out of the holes in the net, bubbling and squirming to burst free.

Caleb surged to his feet, cannoning into one of the scouts and wrestling them away from Phoenix. “No!” he yelled, “He’s not—a monster! Leave—him—alone!”

“Get off!”

The scout drew a spell circle, and a flesh-eating plant tore out of the ground, snapping Caleb up in its jaws. The human yelled in pain, and a sound like a roar burst out of Phoenix’s throat. A surge of energy shot through his limbs, and he tore the net apart.

“Titan—”

“Watch out, there it—”

Without thinking, Phoenix threw one hand out, and the cursed mud responded, shooting forward and slamming into one scout’s chest, throwing him backwards into a tree. The other scout threw a fireball at him, and he raised his other arm to shield himself. The magic slammed into his arm, but it didn’t seem to burn, just sort of… splattered against the mud uselessly. Phoenix tossed the scout into the branches of another tree effortlessly, turning to face the plant.

The cursed mud stretched out so far that he could see most of his arm’s bones, and some of his fingers as well. Phoenix faltered, exhaustion sweeping up from the tips of his fingers and through his whole body, like the mud was sapping all the energy he had left.

Caleb cried out as the plant tightened its grip, and Phoenix’s vision blurred. He felt himself moving, felt trees rushing past him, felt something heavy in his arms, but it was all automatic, his feet stumbling along the way until familiar lights blinked at him. He heard a yell for someone to help, and something tugged at the weight in his arms—Caleb, he realized, someone was trying to pull Caleb away. A snarl rasped out of his throat, and he pulled Caleb closer. Shadowy people moved in his eyesight, their faces blurred and indistinct, but all of them keeping a wary distance. He felt big, and detached, like some clumsy beast that had stumbled into a domesticated town.

Something wrapped around his waist, something solid and warm. Phoenix started to pull away, but the thing just clung tighter. It didn’t make any move to take Caleb, or tug him anywhere, or knock him over, it just… held on.

Hugged, he realized, and some small part of Phoenix started to settle back down, enough that he saw and recognized the dirty, freckled face that pressed against him, eyes squeezed shut. He recognized the scar stretching from his left eyebrow to just under his right eye, and the calloused hands, rough from hours spent in the garden.

“Mole?” he whispered.

Evelyn hovered in front of them, her hands fluttering like she wasn’t quite sure whether or not it was safe to touch him. Finally, she stepped forward, sliding one arm around a half-conscious Caleb. Phoenix let her help him down, wrapping his arms around Mole instead.

Mole squeezed so tightly Phoenix’s bruised ribs ached, but he didn’t pull away. “I’m sorry,” Phoenix whispered, “I’m sorry, you were right. I should have asked for help.”

Mole sniffed and nodded, stepping back and holding one fist to his chest, rubbing it in a circle.

“He also says sorry,” Evelyn supplied, “For… being angry?” she guessed.

Mole nodded and hugged Phoenix again. Phoenix wrapped one half-melting arm around him, which quickly turned to one arm around his shoulders while Mole helped him into the house, Phoenix’s legs folding and stumbling like a newborn snake-horse’s. Cherry paced back and forth in the kitchen, but his attention was mostly taken up by the baby grimwalker in his arms, who kept trying to tug on his hair.

“They found you.” Cherry leaned against the table for balance, his distraction allowing the little grimwalker to grasp his flyaway hair strand firmly. “I thought—it got worse, and I didn’t say any—” He held the baby grimwalker tightly, as if they were the only thing keeping him tethered to the world. “But you’re—not okay. But you’re here—titan.”

“I’m sorry,” Phoenix croaked. Guilt bubbled up in his stomach again—Cherry had been in a bad enough state when he’d left. And Phoenix had added the stress of hiding how badly he was doing on top of that. “Cherry, I…”

Grimwalkers gathered in a murmuring circle around Phoenix, staring at his arms.

“Did he…” Meleager asked quietly, gesturing to Caleb.

“No,” Caleb protested weakly, “He—”

A loud retch split the air, and the crowd parted around one grimwalker with a blotchy scar marring their right cheek. Everything else about them was pale—their platinum blonde half-up hair, the magenta of their eyes that fell closer to light pink, and the color of their skin, so pale it was almost translucent. They held one hand to their mouth, staring at Phoenix’s arms.

“Ash—” Evelyn started, but they backed away, gagging again, then turned and ran.

“On it,” Matt promised, chasing after them.

At the edge of the circle, Sam glanced at Cherry, who’d started pacing again, at Evelyn, who was still supporting Caleb, and at Phoenix and Mole. His spine straightened, and he gave the grimwalker next to him a slight push.

“Okay!” he announced briskly, shooing grimwalkers out of the kitchen, “Quit gawking! Big whoop! You people are acting like you’ve never seen a guy’s arms drip off his bones before! Give them space! Go do your chores! Isn’t it time for a patrol? Get on it!”

The crowd slowly dispersed, still murmuring.

“They’ll get used to it, assuming you can’t get rid of it,” Sam announced, “We all will.” He gave Evelyn a pointed look at that, then flounced off, following the grimwalkers to the hallway.

Evelyn lugged Caleb towards the temporary medical center. Phoenix started to follow, but fell at his first step, every muscle completely drained of energy. Mole half-carried him to Cherry’s room, pushing him into bed.

“What about—” Phoenix started in a whisper, but Mole just shook his head with a sigh, throwing a blanket over him. He patted Phoenix’s shoulder, as if to say leave it to me, and went outside, closing the lights and the door behind him. Phoenix sighed, pulling his arms close to himself under the blanket.

If I go to sleep now, will I wake up? Or will it take over?

Despite the worry twisting in his stomach, Phoenix’s eyes started to droop shut, heavy with exhaustion.

Just… for a moment.