#there is this One Fucking Thing about it that i am so fucking embarrassed about

[yaseraphinee]

pick a card 2 - what do people like about you ? 

PILE 1.

The Star , 3 of Cups , 4 of Wands, King of Pentacles, Justice, The Emperor, 4 of cups, 3 of swords

The girls’ girl pile :  “90% of life is confidence. The thing about confidence is that nobody knows if it’s real or not.”

If you're not a girl or don't identify as such, this pile might not resonate. 

You really know how to have fun and bring fun anywhere you go. You are always down to party. You might have hosted or organized parties and people think you’re the best host ever! You probably did one or two memorable parties that were so good even though it was a while ago people still remember until this day and probably still talk about it months, even years after. 

If you haven’t hosted parties, then you’re the life of the party anywhere you go! People truly get addicted to your infectious energy : you’re not afraid to share your cup with others. Just like in the 3 of cups’ illustration, you raise a toast with everyone you meet, celebrating the small wins in life, not afraid that your cup might spill a bit from the shock of the metals together.

People like how you dance and move your body. You’re probably a really good dancer. You’re not scared to embarrass yourself by being the only one on the dancefloor at a dull party. You simply don’t care of other people’s judgements : you came to a party/club , you’re here to FUCKING DANCE. You’re probably the type to not understand why people don’t dance in clubs like the girl you paid to be here. Why are you shyly swinging like that ??!! get your ass up and dance! 

People love your confidence and how contagious it is. You remind me of Maddy Perez from Euphoria. Even if you don’t identify with being a woman, you have this undeniable star quality and fierceness that makes people both envious and inspired. (I just realized I wrote “love” here instead of “like” as the title of the pick a card indicates/suggets. There is just something about that is so out of the ordinary that people simply cannot have mild reactions about you. You incite extreme emotions inside people the moment you walk in a room. The energy, the way you smile. Everything.

People like the fact that you’re probably a girl’s girl. Even though you have a really intimidating exterior and girlboss energy, you also have this softer side that makes people feel so safe. I think you probably went through hell and back to attain the confidence that you have today. Part of your purpose here is probably to help people feel better in their skins. You’re a baddie healer basically. I am seeing girls’ bathrooms in clubs or other public areas like that. You probably helped many girls/ or heartbroken people who were hiding in the bathroom during a party. The type of girl in middle school/ high school that instead of making fun of a girl for having a period stain, would tell her and help her change/ or get rid of the stain without telling anyone. The type of girl in a group that sees that one person that is left out and that asks about their opinion regarding the conversation they're having so that they feel included. The type of girl that would give beauty tips to girls who struggled with their “femininity” growing up or were in a strict or religious household that didn’t let them put makeup on or act girly.

The scene with Lexi and Maddy, where Maddy teaches Lexi about confidence while putting lip liner on her, sums up this “girls’ girl” side of you. Lexi says she feels stupid with the makeup on. To that, Maddy answers that everyone feels stupid and  that it's a choice that she made to stop feeling that way. Lexi replies that she doesn't know if she is able to stop feeling stupid so maddy tells her that “ 90% of life is confidence. The thing about confidence is that nobody knows if it’s real or not.” 

(do you work in the beauty industry by any chance ? like are you a nail tech, a hairdresser, a makeup artist or an esthetician ? there is something prominent about that field of work here.) 

Placements you might have : moon in leo, sun in leo, moon in aries, sun in aries, sun in sagittarius, cancer placements, Venus in cancer, Venus in Leo, Pluto in the 1st house, Chiron in an angular house (1st, 4th, 7th, 10th house), Chiron in Leo, North node in Leo, North node in Aquarius, Mars in Leo, Aries or Sagittarius, Mars in Libra, Saturn in Leo, Sun in leo conjunct Saturn, Saturn in the 5th house, 8th house placements, Lilith in Leo, Lilith in Aquarius

You might have a master number as a Lifepath ( life path 11, 22 or 33. For you I am mostly picking up life path 11 or 33, The illuminator/Psychic and the Spiritual teacher.)

=> link of the scene with Maddy and Lexi about confidence

SONG : Feel it - Ayesha Erotica (the song is so spot on i swear ayesha's songs are the epitome of leo energy slayy)

PILE 2.

Page of Pentacles, 6 of cups, 4 of cups, Judgement, The Hierophant, The Moon, The Hanged Man, 9 of swords

A diamond in the rough

First and foremost, this pile has a really different energy from pile 1. They’re probably even opposite lol. If you want to read pile 1 before reading this one, don't hesitate as it might help you understand the description better (which is not so clear at times).You are literally the person that is helped/ or feels healed by the archetype of person described in pile 1.  It’s like both of your piles are complementary.

You might lack a bit of self-confidence, and might have a hard time affirming yourself yet I weirdly feel this is what people like about you ?? It’s like maybe they see you holding yourself back when you could accomplish so much but they are not concerned for you because they know you will accomplish great things in life eventually.

You can be a bit  shy or reserved, and people like that about you. They think it's cute.

People like your social awkwardness. Despite having a hard time socializing, you still try your best to keep up with the conversations and what is going on around you and people find it really cute. It’s like people like the fact that they can protect you, or defend you. You might appear like you’re often lost or in your head.

People like the fact that they can see your potential before you can even see it yourself.

It's kind of weird to be honest but it’s like they like the fact that they can imagine endless possibilities for your future.

They like the fact that you don’t see your potential in a way ?? It’s hard to explain because it doesn’t come from ill intentions at all

They like how talented you are. I am picking up on how raw your talent is. They like your raw beauty, your raw talents : your raw everything. There is something so real about you. I don’t think you do it consciously but you have no filters : you live your life in all honesty and authentically.

This might not be for everyone but I am picking up that some of you are like this because you’re neuroatypical/ neurodivergent. It’s just the way your brain works naturally.

They like how “naive” you are, not in a derogatory sense as in “you don’t understand life” but they find it refreshing that you just live and experience things without suppressing your true inner feelings

They like how you live your emotions fully, whether they’re good or bad. This might make people uncomfortable at times, because your rawness subconsciously triggers their shadow and what they suppress in their lives.

People basically like how you act as a mirror without intending to. They like that you work as a catalyst for change, but you’re not even aware of it.

People see that you have a superpower, something that you do naturally that they could never achieve and they like it. Just like pile one you trigger AND inspire them at the same time but in a different way.

They like how unique you are. You truly are a diamond in the rough.

This pile was a little shorter than the other piles, but I think the message is just pretty straightforward.

Placements you might have : sun in aquarius, sun in pisces, neptune dominant, Uranus and Neptune in the first house, Pisces stellium, Aquarius stellium, Gemini rising, Virgo rising, Libra rising, Venus in Capricorn, Saturn in the 6th house, Pluto in the 4th house, 5th house and 4th house placements, Saturn in the 2nd house, Jupiter in the 4th house, 5th house

SONGS : Perfect night - LE SSERAFIM / Chilhood dreams - ARY / Class of 2013 - Mitski

PILE 3.

Ace of cups, Strength, Temperance, Page of Cups, The Sun, 8 of Pentacles, Queen of Pentacles (i started your pile and didn’t realize the Queen of Cups was hidden under the Page of cups! You probably evolved a lot and serve as an example to many people around. Going from a Page to a Queen is not easy at all)

Top of the deck was The High Priestess.

The Spiritual Warrior

First and foremost, you got 3 major arcanas, and 2 out of the 3 fell first.. damn… Don’t tell the other piles but this might be the most powerful pile of the reading lmaoo

You might be older, like in your forties, thirties. Even if you’re not, you just had to grow up really fast and take on a lot of responsibilities early. You probably experienced a divorce or some sort of loss that made you jaded towards life for a while. But then, you were reborn. 

People like your authoritative energy. You command respect, you incite some sort of fear inside people. However, a group of younger people might see you as an example. They might see you and think to themselves : “I want to be like them when I grow up. And I'll do anything that I can”. Driven youngsters see you as a role model. They aspire to attain the quiet confidence you have today. 

Children probably like you, they feel safe around you. You have healing energy, but it isn’t exactly soft, like one of a fairy for instance. You’re more of a monk or a nun. You don’t necessarily try to spread positivity. You aim to find inner peace, and this inner power will be alchemized as an aura that heals. Your mere presence is healing. You don’t have to say a word. Your gaze and aura do all the job for you, and that’s because you are extremely aligned with the universe.

Oblivion by Grimes is currently playing as I am doing your pile. The song is really disturbing, kind of haunting in a way and is about a traumatic experience Grimes went through. She explained the meaning behind this song in an interview saying : “The song is about being violently assaulted and it made me crazy for a few years. I got really paranoid walking around at night and started feeling really unsafe. The song is more about empowering myself physically amongst a masculine power, and the hate of feeling powerless, making light of masculine physical power, making it jovial and non-threatening. I took a typically violent cultural situation and made it pop and happy.”

You might relate to this in a way or might have lived a similar experience before.

“See you in a dark night” is a prominent lyric here. Are you part of the Pluto in Scorpio generation perchance ?  There is this thing where you might have been a really giving person in the past. You were like a fairy, probably the "panic pixie girl" archetype (you don't have to be a girl by the way). However, many losses in your life made you lose that innocent spark. Now, despite not being as cheerful and positive as you were before, you hold a deep, almost lethal strength inside of you.

There is a lot of Yellow, Blue and White in your spread. Your chakras are definitely aligned and it’s powerful. You probably have a really similar aura to angels. Your aura might be white. There is a glow, a light that follows you everywhere you go. 

=> Energetically speaking, white is thought to be a very high vibrational color, relating to pure light. As spiritual author Shannon Kaiser tells mbg, "White is the rarest of all aura colors and indicates purity, integrity and a high level of spirituality."

People almost have no words to describe what they like about you. They’re simply left speechless.

I want to say “they like”, but stronger words such as “love” keep on coming up. People cannot just LIKE you, they get addicted and fascinated by your energy.

They like your energy, your otherworldly energy. 

People like your wisdom and your mysterious demeanor. 

People like the fact that you are a mystery, but your energy doesn’t want them to know more about you. They like the mystery just as it is. 

People like how fascinating you are. 

People like how resourceful you seem

People like how you seem like an immovable object. Nothing seems to be able to make you flinch, or react. 

People like how your gaze reveal so much but nothing at the same time.

People like how you embody the sentence/ quote “Everything, Everywhere, all at once”. (I don’t really know what this is supposed to mean exactly but this might be relevant to you / maybe the movie ?)

People like the way you look too - if you know about face type essences and kibbe body type you’re probably have Angelic (ethereal) face type essence and a Dramatic body type. You look like you could play in series like Game of Thrones or just that you came straight out of a sci-fi movie or fantasy novel

What people like about you is directly linked to the effect you have on them : your existence leaves them speechless

I am getting the word “ineffable” would describe how people see you and what they like about you. The meaning of that word is “something that is too great or extreme to be expressed or described in words.”

Placements you might have : to be honest, your energy is so complex that it’s hard to pick up on specific placements. I am only getting aura colors.

Maybe Pluto harshly aspecting the first house, a lot of asteroids in the first house, chiron might be prominent in your chart, 8th house placements, 12th house placements, 10th and 11th house placements, Lilith in the 11th or 12th house

Signs that this pile might be you : chakra candles, spirituality, divination; angel gabriel, goddesses, angels, you might really spiritually connected, 1010, 1111, 777, 444, angel numbers

SONG : Oblivion - Grimes

[limerence-17]

leave the door open

based on: number 7.

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

masterlist

warnings: 18+ mdni p in v (bc mentioned,) explicit language, oral sex (f receiving), fingering

word count: 1.6k

A/N: all characters are 18+ here. obx season 4 didn't have to make rafe this sexy but here we are and i hope u all enjoy <3 also psa yes i know kinktober is over but i feel kinky all year and what about it

i wasn't going to touch myself. in fact i wasn't even thinking about it, and yet here i was about to spend the night at my best friend sarah cameron's house and all i could think about was the way her older brother looked coming into the house after getting off his motorbike. the way his hair swayed as he ran his hands through it, and the way he grunted as he walked by us in the kitchen.

he didn't even make eye contact and yet i couldn't stop myself from staring right at him as he walked by.

but here i was laying in the guest room, in this giant house that i still couldn't wrap my head around the fact that my best friend lived in and all i could think about was god damn rafe cameron.

────── 〔✿〕──────

that night, it was rather warm out, but i was feeling tired, dazed perhaps. sarah had come into my room, told me john b wanted to see her which was predictable as usual and snuck out through the guest room window. she told me she'd be back by 7 am which meant i'd be spending the night on my own. i didn't mind it but it could get lonely.

the sun was setting, and i felt strange spending such a lovely summer evening inside getting ready for bed but i suppose that was alright considering i spent the entire day out and about.

i nustled my legs smoothly against the satin sheets. something about staying at the cameron's house always reminded me of staying in some nice hotel. everything just smelt clean, like oranges and fresh air.

my shorts rode up my ass slightly, but i paid hardly any notice to them. it was so hot out anyway. i turned over, glancing outside the window. it was quiet out, too quiet and yet my mind wandered back to rafe in the kitchen. his hair falling ever so slightly in front of his eyes, the way he smelt. like sea salt and expensive cologne.

i couldn't help but shift my body so that my back laid against the bed, slowly arching my back as my hand glided to my shorts, placing soft slow circles against my clit. slowly, but i applied more pressure the more i circled. i couldn't help but let out a moan and had to cover my. mouth as i continued on. i wanted to take off my shorts as i thought about rafe. his hands, his hair, god his hands.

"holy fuck...rafe..." i moaned out in a hushed whisper.

my eyes kept closed, but my fingers continued to roam beneath the sheets until i heard a creak that was louder than i would've thought. i stopped dead in my tracks, moving both of my hands up over the sheets pulling them up swiftly to my chin.

oh my god it was rafe cameron. standing there with his zip up sweater, and clean cut pants. but the way he looked at me, well i couldn't tell what he was thinking but his eyes were wide. very wide.

"shit i didn't mean-"

"swear to god i wasn't listening or anything," said rafe dumbly. he ran his right hand over his mouth, looking at the ground.

"whatever you think you saw or heard or whatever the fuck you didn't rafe!" i was too embarrassed to muster up anything else. i just held the covers high.

"hey it's no big deal seriously... i mean i jerked one off like six hours ago so like-"

"jesus rafe, i mean it! delete this from your mind or i swear to god i'll-"

"see the thing is i can't really delete that from my mind. you moaning my name and all..." rafe closed the door behind him and took a few steps towards the bed.

"oh fuck you heard that?" i was mortified. just mortified. what was wrong with me?

"now the thing is...you're my sister's best friend so so like... i mean that's kinda fucked up-you thinking about me while you touch yourself and shit," rafe said in a drawl, using his hands to express it. rafe was now sitting at the edge of the bed. his eyes were glancing around quickly, his thoughts clearly racing.

i lowered the sheets but made sure that they were still just above my chest. but holy fuck, i was soaking wet now.

"but hey it makes sense- the way you look at me, always thought it was in my head and shit but-"

"it's not." i interrupt him. the more he looks at me the more i just picture his tongue in my mouth and i'm starting to get needy, my legs are clenching together now.

rafe's eyebrows raised, and he froze for a moment. but then his hands slowly crept up the sheets grabbing my thigh. i gasped feeling his hand there. his eyes widened, watching my expression.

"this what you were thinking about, huh?" his hand crept up agonizingly slow. i couldn't get a word out. just stiffled moans until eventually the sheets were down below my chest.

i let out a longing sigh as i felt his sturdy hand cup my pussy, using his other hand to move the bedsheet off completely, exposing me completely.

he looked up, asking for approval as his hands slowly tugged at the hems of my shorts and i nodded quickly.

"yes rafe."

rafe obliged immediately, pulling my shorts down, i pulled my tank top over my head. my legs lifted in the air as he threw them onto the floor. he slowly separated my legs, ogling at my obviously wet cunt.

he used his middle and ring finger to slowly trace a line up against my folds and i gasped at the touch.

"god damn my sister's best friend is a little slut huh? you're wet as shit and that's all for me huh?"

all i could let out was an innocent "mhmm," since the feeling of his fingers tracing against my folds was driving me lust drunk.

"yeah... i'm gonna need to taste you...." he said, now crouching so that his head was between my thighs.

"wait rafe-" rafe stopped immediately, glancing up at me.

"take off your shirt."

rafe smirked, obliging as he pulled it over his head, and i felt my eyelids grow heavy from lust as i looked at his chest. jesus, he was ridiculously hot. my best friend's ridiculously hot older brother was about to eat me out.

this time, more aggressively he separated my thighs and before i could comprehend it his lips were against my pussy. his tongue moved up and down, circles against my clit. as if it was instinct, i gripped at the bedframe. but it didn't last long as he gripped my hips, pulling me in closer to him. my thighs tightened against his head and it felt insane. i'd never had someone eat me out like this. so hungrily and quickly. he was incredible.

"shit you taste fucking unreal-" he grunted and gasped before licking me once more.

rafe's tongue moved quickly but he pulled away, moving so that he was now on top of me. he made eye contact before inserting a finger into me and i gasped. it was only a few pumps, hard and fast before he pulled out.

"taste yourself-" he said and i obliged, sucking on his finger. rafe licked his teeth, letting out a low hum of a laugh as he watched.

"you are fucking wild-" he said. my hands reached towards his pants and he looked down and then back up at me.

"what- you wanna feel me too?"

"rafe i wanna feel all of you- i want you inside me."

that set him off and he quickly reached to his pants, pulling them down along with his briefs. he was hung, like way more than i ever would've imagined. and hard too.

"looks like i'm not the only one whose this turned on either huh?"

rafe let out a sarcastic laugh "ha...ha...."

he got on top once more, this time pinning my legs higher in the air.

"yeah fuck i need to see all of you when i fuck you," rafe commanded.

"you're on that girl pill or whatever it is right?" rafe asked. i let out a quiet snicker.

"birth control, rafe? yeah i am," i said running my hands through my hair.

rafe nodded quickly, obviously thankful since it was clear neither of us brought condoms.

he positioned himself so that his tip was directly against my folds and then slowly pushed himself into me. i gasped, immediately reaching my fingernails against his back.

rafe grunted as his pumps started slow, but eventually quickened up. he moved quickly, thrusting and grunting into me. i let out stifled moans and he clasped his hand over my mouth.

"hey...hey... you've gotta be more... quiet than that... holy....fuck" rafe moaned between thrusts.

his paced quickened, his strong arms now moving to my waist as he pulled me to the edge of the bed. he thrusted deafening quick and i clenched my fist placing it against my mouth in a stupid attempt to silence myself. he was too fucking good at this. too strong, too fast, too fucking hot.

"don't stop! rafe jesus i'm gonna cum!"

"shit... me fucking too..."

it only took a few more thrusts before i let out a stiffled sigh and rafe collapsed, falling on top of me. both of us sweating, exhaling and my hands running through his hair.

he pulled away, laying beside me. i turned over to meet his gaze, my hands still running through his hair. he looked back at me.

"alright round two-"

[undercoverslutt]

bestiesolderbrother! simon <- masterlist simon "ghost" riley x reader

during the summer before sophomore year.

let's take a blast to the past, okay?

"So, when are you going back to college?" His voice flings from across the room, and it's like his timber is clawing up your back, you feel it at your neck. Simon's voice did so much to you, it was so different than all the other guys at your campus. So deep, provocative and protecting. He was only a few years older than you, and his sister. He didn't go to college like you two, but he was extremely smart. He came back from bootcamp earlier in the summer, and was staying at his parents house until he could find his own place.

Simon was the "problem child", always getting into trouble, never really knowing what was next with him. But he was so smart, street smart. You never felt more safe with a man's presence in your entire life. Your dad was never around, and your mom never really cared where you went off to. So you were always here, with your best friend and her older brother, and their parents. You did like being in their company, this was your second home, if need be. And sometimes you did need it. No, you didn't really need to be here for the comfort aspect, but when your mom locked you out of the house one too many times, you couldn't help but need to come to take a few showers and get some spare clothes from your best friend during the summer. Her parents were very understanding. Even if they didn't talk about it much, it was almost unspoken.

"I go back in like," You close your eyes as you tally up the days, feeling a bit overwhelmed at having to talk to this guy, "I'd say a month and a half."

This was going to be your sophomore year in college. Were you ready for school again? No. Did you want some new atmosphere? Yes. Were you missing your own dorm? Yes. You didn't have a roommate, thank the heavens.

It was really quiet in this part of town. And your best friend's got a new boyfriend so she's rarely ever home anymore, let alone when you guys go off to college. You barely see her at all. It's like you're living in her house, without her. But she said she would be back later tonight so you guys could go out to eat, maybe? That's if her man doesn't string along

But Simon was here a-lot of the time. And he was nice to you. Very respectful. Trying to make you feel as normal as possible. He tended to ask you many questions when you guys were alone, and you thought it was sweet. He just wanted you to be able to talk to someone. About anything.

"Excited?" He continues.

"Yeah, I am." You let out a laugh, you know your non-enthusiastic character was completely juxtaposing everything you were saying. "It's just school though, you know?"

Simon nods, and starts picking up a jacket, almost like he was following your movements. "You got a boyfriend that I need to know about?"

A boyfriend?

"No?" You say shortly. You weren't in the mood for guys, I guess. You begin pulling your shoes from the cubby, you always put them in the third box to the right. It was yours at this point. "Not at the moment, Si. Why are you asking?"

You begin to tie your shoes, bending down so you don't have to look at him at all. You don't know if you feel embarrassed, awkward, or just weirdly protected by his questions. He's quiet for awhile. "If you're anything like my sister, I want to give you some advice."

Advice. Please.

"Don't be like her, okay?" He starts off, and you fucking laugh. You fucking laugh, and he stops in his tracks. "What? I'm being serious."

"I am too. You don't have to worry about my decision-making. If that's what you're saying." You look up at him finally. So he's just trying to be that type of person right now. One thing you hated, was someone trying to give you "advice" on shit you didn't need help with. You were fine on your own and always had been. You didn't need anything. You didn't need a parent.

"No, no, not at all." He repeated, finally situating a jacket on his bulky body. "I'm just saying."

"What?" You want him to continue, but you don't know if he will.

"Just be careful." He stops, zips up his jacket and grabs his phone. You grab your keys and the bag you had brought. The next words he says are heavy to you, and slow, like he's trying to make you understand what he was trying to say. "You've grown up."

That heat crawls back, down to your palms and up your neck. He was acknowledging you. "I know, Simon."

You wanted to say something more about this, but the only thing happening was a weird, tight-lipped smile on your face. "I'll catch you later, ghost."

[metalheads-trash-bin]

THIS WILL BE THE LAST TROLLS POST I EVER MAKE.

First off, thank you to those of you that continued to show all the work I make love. Thank you for caring for my work other than Trolls.

Now, onto this post and my final statements about this fandom.

I joined the fandom late, I’d always technically been a part of it but never interacted until about a year or so ago through this site. Immediately I got interaction and a good amount of followers, a lot of people enjoying my work and wanting more.

That “wanting more” slowly became harassment as I got messages every day from a select few people commanding me to continue writing or making fanart. This slowly started to seep into me but was NOT the nail in the coffin. Even as i got handfuls of asks commanding more.

The nail was how the fandom handles abuse and abusers. I am a punk person, to those of you that know my Tiktok i post a LOT of punk content and have gained so much interaction. I am well known in a lot of communities and am even trying to advocate for the people that cant. It is BASE LINE respect to “always believe the victim”. Base line. Yet as soon as a very POPULAR and HIGHLY FOLLOWED creator who is being accused of abuse posts content back showing very explicit conversations and mental breakdowns to embarrass you into silence everyone FLOCKS to them. I had so many friends in this fandom, and as soon as i was publicly HUMILIATED by him for speaking out, i was being blocked. Some of the people i used to make fanart for and support are now people i look at with fear and disgust. This includes my fans, people who BETRAYED me and did not stand with me. Didnt QUESTION why all of a sudden I deleted everything?

Let me lay things out for you all, FINALLY. Since im fucking PISSED. He BLACKMAILED ME INTO SILENCE. He got his boyfriend to THREATEN ME. And when all was said and done as i was choking on my sobs? He kept the post UP. His post with THOUSANDS of views and comments saying disgusting things about me. Because no one gave a FUCK about the fact that me and my friend both came out about horrors when it came to him and his new boyfriend.

I am so disgusted and disappointed as to how my fans reacted to this all, i had even gotten a dm PRAISING ME for going back into silence. That broke my fucking heart.

Why am i bringing this up now? Because a multitude of his art for Fliff had had messages for me. Which NO ONE but me and my fiance knew about. Dictator barb? Message. Floyd saying insults to riff? Message. Are you all that illiterate to context of someones character? Did the INCEST HE PUT ON HIS TWITTER NOT SAY ANYTHING??? JD and his BROTHER having a threesome, completely naked said NOTHING? And when someone pointed it out he said he didnt give a shit.

No one gave a FUCK. I have so much dirt on one of his friends i used to ADORE that i will never utter even though he also fucking abandoned me because he knew him longer and believed i was the wailing banshee.

So overall, trolls fandom, get your FUCKING ACT STRAIGHT. About victims. And about context.

I am a HUMAN BEING. My callout was not something to laugh at and silence just because you like the PORN he draws.

He’s once again posting after i was able to get him to fuck off from this fandom for almost a year. The relief i felt for that year was bliss. And now? I can barely fucking breathe. Once again i feel trapped.

So FUCK YOU ALL.

Have a fucking ANGRY and HURT tw of self harm under this sentence.

Good riddance, Trolls fandom. This is the last i will utter a word about the fandom or my experience. I am so disappointed.

[osovereign]

out. hello this is kind of embarrassing to say, but this past week has been the worst of my fucking life. i've gotten robbed fired and in a car accident all within less than two weeks and i'm literally suffering so bad. i was already running on thin ice at my current place of employment, but everything kind of took a turn when i pulled a no call, no-show on friday because i was in a car accident and my phone had died and i was at the hospital and i had head pain, and they wanted to make sure that i did not have a concussion. i gave my job the documentation of these events, and then today i had a lady come to my job first and get me because she thought i was somebody else. mind you, i was in the hospital and i did not come to work on this past friday, but she was adamant that i was her server and that i charged her card $200 when, again, i was in the hospital. i was not at work. my manager on duty wasn't trying to fucking help me, so i yelled at her in front of everybody to get the fuck out and learn who the fuck she was talking to amongst other things because that was unacceptable my boss told me he would be doing an investigation, which i didn't understand because i physically was not at work. there's nothing to investigate. there is no way i could've charged this lady's card if i'm not at work. so we got into it about multiple things while i was still at work, and after i left, a couple hours later over the phone so she pretty much terminated me, which it's fine, but that was my primary source of income so i'm kind of screwed.

then i got robbed at gunpoint last week, and while i am physically OK, i had like all of my cash tips from the past week in my wallet, so i lost almost $400 of bill money that i can't get back because even though i filed a police report, like, the cops told me there's no way to get my money back as there's no way to track cash. my only priority at this point is just keeping my phone on because my phone is how i connect to a wifi hotspot to do stuff for university / tumblr. i know i haven't been the most active because i have a very demanding work and school schedule, but one less job means i'll have more time to write hopefully with you all. literally anything helps, even just reblogging this. i feel very bad putting all of this out there, but i'm literally at my wits end of bad event after bad event after bad event. i also apologize to the grammar for this. i'm doing voice-to-text because it's just easier for me right now. i'm thankful that i live at home and my landlord is my mother so i don't have rent to worry about, but pretty much all my other expenses and my day-to-day life do follow me besides rent. i know for that, i am a lot more privileged than other people and while i do have some savings, it's going to pretty much be used to getting me from the doctor and physical therapy appointments because i've already started legal action against the person that hit me and a hit and run, mind you.

edit: blurring license plate

[doctorwhoisadhd]

please understand tha ti am trying. so. god damned hard. to be normal. about this right now

[throes-of-warm-tornadoes]

okay no offense but i’m not a fan of Five finding his “real life” dolores. like, that diva was literally a coping mechanism for him. a tangible reminder that he was so lonely that he made a literal piece of plastic his companion. i think the idea of it is sweet but at the end of the day i think that if Five did find someone romantically it should be someone that makes him feel silly and carefree, not someone that is a fleshy replica of an Apocalyptic Souvenir

[memento-morri-writes]

More dnd writing because it's all I have but I here's a snippet from a vignette I did of Rook's past (from Zara's POV), because Rook and his mentors never fails to make me sick (/pos).

[transcript under the cut]

Taking a coin out of her pocket, she rolled it across her knuckles, back and forth. It gave her hands something to do, and prevented the urge to bite her nails, something she hadn’t done in years. Ten minutes passed, then twenty. Zara began to pace as Rook’s breathing grew shakier and the color drained from his skin. Where the hells is Jay? she wondered. The room was so quiet that she could hear every tick of the small clock on her bedside table, and each one echoed in her head. How many ticks does he have left? She didn’t want to think about it.  She’d had crew members die before, of course. You don’t go as many years as a captain as she had and never lose a soul. But all the others who had died had died quickly, in combat. She’d mourned for all of them, even shed tears in private, but there was something different about watching the life drain out of a person right in front of your eyes.

[solar-halos]

that’s fucking it im making a side blog (also editing to say that this post is giving pg13 so if that makes u uncomfy/if thats something u shouldn’t be reading then don’t click the “keep reading” option ok if u do i WILL find you)

i know i shouldn’t be embarrassed about having interests! that still doesn’t change the fact that i am. so here is the last time i will ever planet of the apes post on main:

i think it would be so cute for annie and zira to be pregnant at the same time. the repeated mentions of annie and finnick fucking nasty style was something i included bc 1) fucking nasty style?? in cages??? yeah, sounds about right coming from these two 2) yall can’t be surprised when we move onto the next installment of the series and annie is suddenly pregnant. like if anything it should be expected bc in any universe finnick’s pullout game is so weak

[304wv66]

HELLO EVERYONE I HAVE NOT DRAWN AT THIS BARE MINIMUM CALIBER SINCE LAST YEAR BUT WE'RE SO FUCKING BACK BABY

anyway here are some of my ocs in their first iterations with the original drawings and their current iterations

[purpurussy]

.

[termagax]

re: "good girl" i think they say it once randomly as a joke and its just one of those things that gets him wayyy more than they expected it would. so now its their secret weapon and they use it very sparingly and every single time he gets super embarrassed about it but it works ill tell you what.

[incesthemes]

hey girlie it’s me, sam winchesters gay lover, your mootie 🥰🥰🥰 i just wanted to let you know, that your tags on the post about that wincest video are based and i agree with every word, hashtag slay couldn’t agree more i loved reading your essay in those tags heart ❤️

omg thank you!!! i'm basically only capable of talking in essays whether people want me to or not, unfortunately

i just have a lot of feelings on this topic and the whole "canon or not canon" argument is weird to me; the themes are pretty darn clear in supernatural (it is NOT known for its subtlety) so idk man. they don't have to kiss to be canon. and they don't have to have a romantic relationship to be canon either. how many times do they get into relationships with other people only for it to be treated as cheating/betrayal/abandonment, only for them have to give up that relationship in order to reaffirm their devotion to their brother

that's just what the text says. i'm not under any kind of delusion that they have some secret sexual or romantic relationship, but that doesn't change that sam and dean are each other's most important person regardless of that. which is really awesome imo, that romance isn't treated as more important than whatever horrible thing they have with each other, and that they don't have to consummate their relationship with romance/sex in order for it to be the most important one they have

(and of course there's romantic/sexual subtext, like parallels and metaphors and misunderstandings and jokes, but to me that just provides a solid foundation for presenting this relationship between them as the most important even though it's not romantic or sexual—because this language of romance is the only one we know, really, when it comes to writing important relationships between characters. it's the only one we know in our own personal lives, to a large extent. so you use the romance/sexuality to symbolize the actual bond they have. which is so much worse lmao)

anyway i think spn is fairly unique in this way because of how no other relationships can really ever stand parallel to the one they share; even in other shows that center male friendship, romance is allowed to coexist with brotherhood. for sam and dean, it's not, and that becomes a point of tension and conflict and resolution many, many times over the course of the show. so like yeah!!! just because it's not romantic or sexual doesn't mean it's not canon, in the sense that their relationship is the point of the show, and it is the most important relationship they have. they chose each other above all else, every single time. yknow, it's "the epic love story of sam and dean" and all that

[perilegs]

i miss my husband <- guy who has to go to the store before he can sit on the computer and kiss elliott sdv

[luridparty]

chat.......ilove him so much.... HELP. WIKIHOW STOP BEING DOWN BAD. PPLEASE I MISS THE FICTIONAL MEN HELP M

[grmpgm]

ok executive dysfunction is kind of ruining my life actually