#there but. go off i guess
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Soo...... are we all just gonna forget about everything she did? Cool. Cool. Cool......
#LOVE when a band releases more music and people conveniently forget all of the shit thats happened#like i havemt been part of this fandom in AWHILE specifically because people continue to romanticize that god forsaken relationship#but the last thing i remember happening years ago was an actual physical abuse situation this guy was in#now ppl are posting videos with the abuser climbing that boy like a pole#youre kidding. right?#people will see a cis white woman being slightly weird and then defend her with their lives. thats an abusive piece of shit u have right#there but. go off i guess#if you know me you know what band this is about#if you dont know DONT dig theres a fucking reason im not tagging or putting names#last i remember her fans doxxed someone. so.#people like to act like the only reason you can hate this chick is bc youre jealous she has a relationship with a pretty boy#girl i dont want your sadboy twink. i just dont want you SLAPPING SOMEONE DRUNKENLY IN PUBLIC ?????#anyways i wish the rest of the band got some attention bc the actual music sounds rlly good#the entire reason i left the fandom is bc the stans of both that dude and the chick hes with.
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artdump... you guys will never guess what i got into (very hard
#(alarm going off) Hello marcylings a new era is upon us#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#farcille#marcille donato#falin touden#chilchuck#micro organism laios is there too I Guess. freak... love him
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The minds of children are a great mystery.
For context, this was based on an old drawing I made that my mom had found:
Just to set the record straight, my dad has never shot me with a gun.
#hollow knight#hollow knight hornet#hollow knight ghost#art#my art#comic#at least Ghost had something to go off of#with Hornet trying to murder them and all#I was just weird I guess
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part 4 of a lot funnier in my head than on paper
#before anyone asks its not a series the part 4 is a joke dont go looking#the solver granted me this mental image#definitely not at the right skill level to draw it correctly but i did good enough#nori forgetting her ipod in space and then needing n to launch her into orbit to get it back#yknow now that im actually stopping to think about it v would be the only one of the two in functioning order at this point#or they just waited for n to regen and then forced him to do this#we both know n is fully capable of punting nori into orbit#something something stupid mutt#my hatred for this is growing the more i look at it im gonna finish off the tags#art#murder drones#murder drones n#murder drones nori#murder drones uzi#murder drones flesha#i guess#or#murder drones cyn#serial designation n#one day ill be able to draw n in a way i like#noris text box is supposed to be a rose it did not come out looking like a rose#i dont know how to draw roses help
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One wedding and three funerals
Background paintings under the cut
#tomgreg#succession#tom wambsgans#greg hirsch#shiv roy#roman roy#kendall roy#yeah no im not tagging everyone thats too much#this is me going 'how much implications themes and symbolism can i fit in one painting'#yes i gave rose shivs haircolor. if we ever find out how she looks like and its not like this im just gonna pass away i guess#but yeah i hope yall connect the dots#i put waaay too much thought and work into this. i was googling pictures of all the actors as kids just for reference (sigh)#honestly kinda wanted to make tom and greg link pinkies as like. a pinkie promise. but that was too hard to draw in this angle#at least not without obstructing the view of the ring which is important to see so ya#my fave is actually the tomshiv wedding pic i went off with that. i love them... they should have run away to become sheep farmers fr fr#anyway im so glad im done with this UGH!! finally i can draw smth else without being like oh noooo i need to finish this#i see a lot of you wondering why there is no portrait of logan but one of ewan#it's bc the placement of the painting represent their standing. logans portray would not hang next to the stairs#his present portrait hangs at the end of it. all the way up at the top. alone and withering away#basically the picture you see underneath ewan to the right? its where toms parents would be. the right side of the wall is tom and gregs#and the left one is the roy siblings theirs. since they grew up rich rich. and tom and greg didn't#but ya thats why ewan hangs here and logan does not :)
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Bonus round! Do you use a queue tag?
#ive been super curious about this because people seem to have really strong opinions on the queue! so many people seem to HATE it#but i love using the queue! i dont really know exactly why i like it so much- i started using in like... 2016 and its a fundamental part of#my tumblr experience now. i think i started off just using it for offline hours so id hit most my american mutuals (/ for aes posts)#but these days basically everything goes in my queue (cept time sensitive things & like. current hype and original posts-#anything 'normal' posting is in the queue)#idk it feels. nice to me! i like to spread out my posting and not rb 30 things in half an hour and then disappear for the rest of the day#esp since my spaces are so circular- the same post runs on my dash a dozen times minimum. and i get to put it on ur dash a week late!!!#and its so nice to have small interactions with mutuals in incompatible timezones; to open up my notifications in the morning#and go: oh! my friends were here <3#its such a Part of the tumblr experience for me i dont think i could ever truly change now. maybe switch to timed queueing#but my availability changes so much i prefer to just. know i guess#but (i am so sorry for all that) im curious about how other people feel!!!!!! itd be so interesting to hear abt why people do/do not like i#i know some people like the experience of spamming and going. some people think it makes this seem to much like influencing or whatever#everyone has their reasons and i want to know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#nyxtalks#poll#queue#no see answers option because you must fall into one of these
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can't believe garak went from 'hope you have fun following my little breadcrumb trail of maybe-truths doctor it builds character ;)' at the beginning of the show to '*sigh* fuck it here's the whole loaf. the entire fucked up bakery of my soul. if you somehow still wanna have sex with me after this you know where I am, yours in infinite longing etc.' in a stitch in time. has anyone ever been so pathetically horrifically enduringly down bad as garak is for julian (laudatory)
#that's some real lodestar simp stuff you've got going on garak and I'm so happy for you/sorry . I guess that's the thing about love#garashir#elim garak#star trek#star trek ds9#ds9#I take the same approach to 'a stitch in time' that I do to deacon's final story in fallout 4 -- I'm agnostic on if ALL details are true#but overall it's certainly *emotionally* truer than even the truth could be sort of situation. genuinely emotionally intimate finally.#which I think is the more important part#and part of that is being weapons grade longing material fjdskjafsa. off the pining scale.
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#voice reveal i guess#whats my accent#technically over a year but had to go off mones for a few months cuz ✨️missouri✨️#bouba to kiki
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we’ve officially reached the 1 year mark since the last zelda release so that means it’s time for me to lose it and start analyzing characters' walking speeds
#i’m going to remake my zelink video with totk moments added because jesus CHRIST#personal#edit: ok this one popped off so i guess i have to put it in the analysis tag lmfao#zelda analysis
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act 4 :(
@chipper-smol and i came to a realization
#THID FUCKING GAAAAAAAMMMMEEEEE#i have more i wanna draw but my hands not working orz.. maybe ill get around to it later idk#i finally FINALLY managed to get inside that star room.. my own clone!! now neither of us will be virgins!!!!#i dont have anything to go off of but when the journal mentions making another 'me' it reminds me of loop saying theyre like a mirror#theyre always able to read siffrins mind without actually reading their mind (or so they say) but maybe it could just be tone matching???#or smth like that.. idk if these two things are connected though so maybe its more like subtext#i hope im not the only one who made the childrens hospital joke when it came around to color lore part 2#im also getting the sinking feeling of watching siffrin toe his way near the deep end like bro is so so close to losing it#i feel like if i knew nothing abt the game beforehand and why siffrin is looping in the first place my feelings abt this would be different#cuz id be pretty angry too if ive been stuck in a loop long enough to feel like everyone around me is pretending nothings wrong#than the fact that i have decided not to disclose im in a time loop and that everyone is living this day for the first time#although i also get hes doing this for a reason and when u believe in the universe i guess it also comes with sunk cost fallacy#'this is the path the universe led me down before i even knew what i wanted so all i can do is double down' THATS THE FATALISM TALKING#puppy plays isat#in stars and time#isat#isat spoilers#isat act 3 spoilers#isat act 4 spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#sona#puppysona#friends#chipper#doodles
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you have to go to work so you can pay for your doctor, who is not taking your insurance right now, and if you say i can't afford the doctor's you are told - get a better job. it is very sad that you are unwell, yes, but maybe you should have thought about that before not having a better job.
(where is the better job? who is giving out these better jobs? you are sick, you are hurting - how the hell are you supposed to be well enough for this better job?)
but you go to the doctor because you had the nerve to be hurt or sick or whatever else. and they tell you that it is because you have anxiety. you try your best. you are a self-advocate. you've done the reading (which sometimes pisses them off worse, honestly). you say it is actually adding to my anxiety, it is effecting my quality of life. so they say that you are fat. they say that all young people have this happen to them, isn't it a medical marvel! they say that you should eat more vegetables. they say that you probably just need to lose a little more weight, and that you are faking it for attention.
(what attention could this doctor possibly give? what validation? that's their fucking job, isn't it?)
there is always a hypochondriac, right. someone always tells you about a hypochondriac. or someone who is unnecessarily aggressive during the worst days of their life. or someone looking "for a quick fix". or some idiot who wasn't educated about how to properly care for themselves who just abandons their treatment. and again, the hypochondriac, the overly-cautious hysteric. these people don't deserve to be treated like humans (right), and since you might be one of these people, you also don't get treated like a human. because those people can really fuck with the system, you now have to pay for it. and besides. you're actually probably faking it.
(more often than not, you find a 2:1 ratio of these stories. for every "hypochondriac", there are 2 people who knew something was wrong, and yet nobody could fucking find it. the story often ends with pointless suffering. the story often ends with and now it's too late, and it's going to kill me.)
you are actually just making excuses. someone else got that procedure or that diagnosis and he's fine, you should be fine too. someone else said they watched a documentary about other inspirational people with your exact same condition, maybe you should be inspirational, too. you're just too morbid. your pain and your experience is probably just not statistically concerning. it is all self-reported anyway, and you're just being a baby.
(once, while sitting down in the middle of making coffee, you had the sudden, horrible thought - i could kill myself to make the pain stop. you had to call your best friend after that. had to pet your dog. had to cry about it in the shower. you won't, but that moment - god, fuck. the pain just goes on and on.)
you know someone who went in for routine surgery and said i still feel everything. they told her to just relax. it took her kicking and screaming before they figured out she wasn't lying - the anesthetic drip hadn't been working. you know someone who went in for severe migraines who was told drink water and lose weight. you know someone who was actively bleeding out and throwing up in the ER and was told you're just having a bad period.
in the ER there are always these little posters saying things like "don't wait! get checked today!" and you think about how often you do wait. how often the days spool out. you once waited a full week before seeing the doctor for what you thought was a sprained wrist. it had actually been broken - they had to rebreak it to set it.
but you go into the doctor. the problem you're having is immediate. the person behind the counter frowns and says we're not taking your insurance. you will be paying for this out-of-pocket.
they send you home with tylenol and a little health packet about weight loss or anxiety or attention deficit. on the front it has your birthday and diagnosis. you think about crying, and the words swim. it might as well say go fuck yourself. it might as well say you're a fucking idiot. it might as well say light your money on fire and lie down in it. and the entire fucking time - the problem persists.
it's okay. it's okay, it's just another thing, you think. it's just another thing i have to learn to live with.
#spilled ink#warm up#can you tell what i'm mad about today specifically#i will say that there are a LOT of things that go into this. like a lot. this is ungendered and unspecific for a reason#it isn't just sexism. it's also racism. and ableism. and honestly classism.#and before a healthcare professional reads this as a personal attack: i understand ur burnt out#we are ALSO burnt out. your situation is also dire. this is not an attack on you.#this is a commentary on the incredible amounts of bigotry that lie at the heart of capitalism#where people have to pay money out of pocket to be told to fuck off.#your job is important. so is our humanity. and if you cannot accept that people are fucking mad as hell#at the industry - you are probably not listening .#anyway at some point im gonna write a piece about sexism specifically in medical shit#but i don't want terfs clowning in it bc they can't understand nuance#> it is true that ppl w/a uterus are more likely to experience medical malpractice & dismissal globally#> it is also true that trans people experience an equally fucked up and bad time in the medical field#> great news! the medical industrial complex is an equal opportunity life ruiner :)#(if you find it necessary to go into a debate about biology while discussing medical malpractice#i want to warn you that you're misunderstanding the issue. because guess what.#cis MEN might experience this. particularly black men. particularly disabled men.#so YES having a uterus can lead to more trouble for you. but this happens a LOT.#instead of fighting those ALSO experiencing your pain.... try working WITH them.#which btw. is like. actual feminism.)
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apocalypse doodlings aka We Couldve Had Grey Hair Erik And Charles Is There Too I Guess
#mcu#xmen#xmen movies#xmen apocalypse#erik lehnsherr#magneto#charles xavier#professor x#cherik#not really but sssshh theyre in the same post#snap sketches#anyway Be Surprised If You Will i just intended to do practice drawings of charles tonight#charles doodle is a vague redraw of the first charles doodle i made so thats fun i GUESS#its been a hot minute and james' face still eludes me but we're getting somewhere Probably. i hope.#but then i remembered micheal said originally they were going to make erik's hair go white in apocalypse and i crumbled#and i was JUST gonna leave it at the first erik drawing but then i was like 'can i draw him chilling for once' so. pseudo screencap redraw#it was so funny drawing the first two back-to-back on the same canvas cause i had Charming Charles in one folder#and i open the second one and its. Rage. Anger. and then to round it off He Got Better :) vjealkeajvLK#sorry i made the charles drawing look like a dating sim screenshot i was gonna leave the bg blank but i got mad at it being blank#so i cobbled that together. i cobble a dating sim appropriate bg together vjelkjea#its so funny a lot of times ill be like 'i wont draw a bg' and then ill make a quick one anyway i cant resist i apologize#ok im so sleepy so goodnight team my head hurt
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friendly reminder that they
are also them
#thats literally how quickly my mood changes#go off i guess#but why is emo matthew so hot#like ruin my life already ugh#emily prentiss#spencer reid#matthew gray gubler#mgg#criminal minds#whoisspence
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you'll never guess which movie i finally watched after 2 years of being lazy
#dont you just love it when your artstyle changes like 5 times in the span of a day#i saw emmachen1003 give them the glove type thingys and went “that looks cool. im stealing it”#so uhm. props to them for being awesome and making cool art#anyways that was a fun movie#not gonna say the title here cause i think it messes with searching and i dont wanna do that#that n frame is like the first time i have ever done a decent angle/perspective thing#im so proud of it you don't even know#murder drones#murder drones uzi#murder drones n#serial designation n#murder drones nori#absolute solver#i guess#or is it absolutesolver#whatever#oh yeah uhmm#murder drones episode 7#murder drones episode 7 spoilers#murder drones spoilers#its been 2 weeks but im gonna give it another day just to be safe#just realized i fucked up the quote and its pissing me off so edited. go fuck yourself
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Happy belated birthday Jamil! I hope you know just how loved you are ❤🐍
#my art#twisted wonderland#twst#jamil viper#yes im over a week late#life got in the way#sorry mr snake...#played around with the colours to make it look like a “lights off” mode#hand drawing all that embroidery felt like i was literally stitching each cushion myself#but at last i am finished#it's the first time i ever properly drew for his birthday so i had to go all out#i hope you will always be happy and free jamil#<3#finally released from this jail i can work on other pieces now...#which as you can guess#is more jamil
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When your boyrfren is a morning person.
(Idk if Connie's not a morning person, but it'd be funny if she isn't.)
Connie doodles (and a Steven!)
#When you wake up already feeling tired 😭#Steven gave her a new blade again.#Pretty knife = Happy wife#Oh my gosh I actually finished a commission today. I;m behind again I only got six hours to draw this week TT-TT But at least I can#sleep early tonight I can finally catch up with my sleep hours#Lol I just realized Connie's new clothes make her look like an overachieving nerd XD#Imagine if she still wears her big round nerd glasses. 'Erm actually it's a [insert what specifically the type of dagger she has now]☝🤓#connverse#Connie Maheswaran#Steven Quartz Universe#Ah nerdcore fashion young adult Connie would be amazing 🤩 . I already headcanon she'd be a more scruffy one tho. 🤔 Guess#that's another alternative style to go off of 🤷♀️#Steven Universe#He gonna hit her up with the 'Hello morning glory! ☀️🥰😘🥰💕' and Connie be looking like a nest#SU#my shiz#animated gif
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