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royallyprincesslilly · 4 years ago

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Title: Shadow & Smoke***

Pablo Schreiber x Reader x Lewis Tan

Warning: Cursing, NSFW, SMUTTTT, DO NOT READ AT WORK

Words: 5k

Summary: Eh. 🤷🏽‍♀️

Note: So this is a mixture of two firsts for me. This was inspired by the song Mr. Man by Alicia Keys. How did I do?

I hope you guys enjoy this. Thank you so much for reading! ❤️

If you enjoyed this, please LIKE, COMMENT and REBLOG. ❤️❤️

**Loosely Edited/Proofread**

The nights were starting to blend together. It wasn’t that you were bored, but there was a routine in place that you’d become—too accustomed to. You were the type of woman who liked routine and normalcy, but you also liked the unpredictability that life sometimes offered. Being the girlfriend of one of the most, if not the most powerful and dangerous man in the city meant that you were always on his arm.

Pablo liked to bring you along to business deals he needed to close. You thought it was to show you off, but it was really a more tactful reason than that. He did it to sift out who had the potential to be disloyal. His logic was if any of them dared to ogle you while he was there, then they’d have the balls to fuck him over in business.

“There’s a thin line between loyalty and disloyalty, and usually the deciding factor in it all came down to a pretty face.”

If he wasn’t bringing you to handle business, you were being whisked to surprise shopping trips, extravagant trips, delectable eateries that charged a ridiculous amount of money for their dishes. Usually, every night, you were on his arm at one of his clubs as he showed his face and ate up all the adoration and respect one in his high position brought.

You’d met him as a liquor sales rep almost four years ago. You walked into one of his clubs with the intent to convince him to purchase some of the alcohol you were peddling. From almost the minute he sat down, you were attracted to him. Who wouldn’t be? The man was almost seven feet tall, built like no one’s business, had haunting hazel eyes, and such a hypnotizing aura around him. He spoke, you listened, he smiled you gawked, he licked his lips, you shifted in your seat.

By the time you got up to leave the club, he’d bought you out of everything, easily meeting and exceeding your quota for the month. His reason was he had to have you free for him because he hated competition of any sort. That was when you got the first glimpse of the man he was—a force to be reckoned with. An hour after you left, he’d already called you and scheduled himself for dinner that night. One dinner led to lunch the next day, then dinner that night, and a whirlwind weekend trip to France where you found out just how much of a force to be reckoned with he was.

Flash forward four years later, and your role in his life had only increased, and your understanding of his role in the city among the mayor, governor, senator, and other heavy hitters had fully sunk in. Pablo “Shadow” Schreiber was at the top of the food chain. Everyone was either terrified of him or wanted to be with him.

“You look incredible tonight, sweetheart.”

Glancing to your left, you found Pablo’s eyes. Within them, there was a hint of mischief as well as a whole lot of desire. You leaned close to his face leaving barely an inch.

“You’re welcome to look, daddy,” you replied a little above a whisper.

At the mention of that word, Pablo’s teeth sunk into his bottom lip as his eyes dropped to yours. Deciding to tease him, you trailed your tongue over your bottom lip, knowing that the long-wear lipstick you wore would stay in place. Pablo’s groan sounded closer to a growl, and with the sound, the heat in his eyes intensified.

“Be careful, sweetheart.”

“Boss.”

Like clockwork, one of his henchmen interrupted. It was always a thing. The two of you would create this bubble of teasing and desire only to have it be popped by someone who needed something from him. You were attention-starved.

Pablo looked from you and to Leo, his third. When Leo got his attention, he leaned down to whisper business. Rolling your eyes, you looked away and around the club. That was when you saw him. he was across the club leaning against the bar. In one hand, he held a drink and clasped between his pointer and middle finger was something rolled and lit. You couldn’t tell if it was a cigarette, a blunt, or something else. Something said it was your second guess.

You watched him raise the crystal glass to his lips. The smoke danced around his face creating an element of mystery that completely intrigued you. From what you could see, he was checking out the club and the women inside. His eyes danced from one to the other, never resting long. Either none of them was what he liked, or he was searching for something—someone specific.

When he brought the rolled substance to his lips, you watched as he took a long puff. Before he released it, his eyes moved to your area of the club. Clutching your drink glass, you watched him, unsure if he were looking at you. The stranger turned his body in your direction and slowly blew out the smoke. If he was mysterious before, he was now ten times so. Slowly the smoke cleared, and it was then you got a good look at his face. He was gorgeous.

It had been a while since a face was able to stop you in your tracks. None had since Pablo’s. You lifted your glass to your lips and slowly drank down the Whiskey. The ice cubes in your glass gently bounced against your lip, giving you a slight chill as the heat of the alcohol deliciously burned you. As the liquid slinked down your throat, your eyes remained locked with the stranger at the bar.

Time seemed to stop. The air became thick, so thick it was almost difficult for you to get a full breath. When you saw his tongue snake out to wet his lips, your eyes dropped to his mouth. A small smirk spread across his lips, and you could feel the smug coming off of him.

Almost unconsciously, your tongue peaked out of your mouth and slowly traced the path around the rim of your glass. His teeth sunk into his bottom lip. Dipping your tongue into the glass, you used it to scoop up an ice cube to suck on. Gone was that small smirk. It was now a full-on grin. He was sexy, and though you knew you shouldn't be doing this, especially with Pablo right beside you, you couldn’t help it. He’d left you wanting for too long.

Once the ice cube had melted, you looked away. His eyes were too hypnotizing, and the longer you looked into them, the more you wanted to risk Pablo’s wrath. Pablo gently rubbed your exposed thigh before he got up and walked off with Leo and Laith. You’d learned early that he was always busy, and his free time was not as plentiful as one would think a boss’s would be. You’d also learned that everything in his life took balance. You must have gotten spoiled when you were his top priority for the first two years.

He went above and beyond, ensuring that you knew your value to him. He went to great lengths to make sure you felt special, loved, and prized above all else. He did this with small, romantic gestures as well as grand displays and deeply satisfying intimate moments. By year three, he’d incorporated more and more work, more and more business trips. Every month he was on a plane. Depending on the reason for the trip, you’d be right beside him on the private jet, but four out of ten times, you were left under the watchful eye of Levi, his brother.

Pablo looked back at you as he walked off. The look spoke volumes, and it was loud. Rolling your eyes, you grabbed the glass he left behind and finished it. The music in the club and the patrons were your only entertainment for a while. When you looked back to the bar, the stranger was gone. You were left with an annoyed feeling that mixed with your slight arousal. You made a note to give Pablo an earful once you got home. If he was hell-bent on keeping you around, he’d better start acting like it.

After twenty or so minutes, you’d had six fingers of Whiskey, and you were feeling better than a little nice. You were still alone at your table under the watchful eye of two of Pablo’s henchmen. Every so often, when a song came on that you liked, you got up and made your way to the VIP dancefloor. This was where the girls of the men Pablo employed hung out. You never mixed with them. You always got the feeling they either didn’t like you, or they wanted to be you--literally. Whatever it was, it always made you uncomfortable.

“It’s both.”

You looked back and found Danika, Levi’s long time girlfriend. The figure-hugging white dress she wore clung to her like a second skin. It matched perfectly with her ankle strap silver heels. She winded her hips to the music and smiled widely.

“When did you get here?”

“Maybe five minutes ago. Levi couldn’t allow me one night of quiet,” she informed.

You closed the space to her. The two of you kissed cheeks like bougie wives did, only it wasn’t fake with the two of you. she and Levi had gotten together about the same time you and Pablo got together, and both of you found solace in each other because you both could relate to what the other was going through. When you were left alone because of Pablo’s trips, more times than not, she would be too because Levi would go as well.

“They don’t like you, and they want to be you. it’s the same with me.”

The two of you glanced at the group of girls huddled to your right and simultaneously rolled your eyes.

“They think if we weren’t in the picture that Levi and Pablo would fuck them,” Danika voiced louder then necessary. She was putting them on notice.

“Not knowing that even if we weren’t in the picture, they’d never look twice at them. There’s filet mignon, and there’s Kobe beef. Why chew on filet mignon when Kobe melts in your mouth?”

The girls were trying not to look at you, but you knew they heard her. Danika had no chill and always spoke her mind. Pablo always thought that when you were together that you wouldn’t get into too much trouble. Little did he know Danika was not the angel she pretended to be. She’d gotten you into your fair share of trouble—trouble he knew about and trouble he didn’t.

The two of you danced together when the song changed and played off each other. In no time, it was as if no one else in the club mattered. While you were wrapped up in the song and the buzz you were feeling from the Whiskey, you saw him again from the corner of your eye. This time he was in a shaded part of the club that was cloaked in dark color. The hues of red and purple decorated his skin but illuminated it enough for you to make out some of the detail. He was incredibly handsome.

Before you knew it, you were dancing with Danika while eye fucking the man. You didn’t know what the hell had come over you. Never in the four years had you behaved like this with anyone else but Pablo. He was the only one who could bring out this wanton side of you—or so you thought. When Danika shrieked out with the change of the song, you looked away from him. You began to wonder if you should make a move.

Glancing around the club, you clocked each of Pablo’s henchmen. His brother, Levi, his number two, was sitting watching Danika, who was now undressing him with her eyes. You knew any minute she’d go over, and they’d be practically fucking in the club. Danika pulled you close to her and whispered.

“You have an audience.”

Glancing at her, she coyly nodded her head over to the stranger. You tried not to smile, but it was useless.

“Ah, you’ve noticed. He’s cute.”

“D, stop.”

“Why? It’s true.”

You giggled and rolled your eyes but took a quick peek in his direction again. His eyes hadn’t left you.

“I can distract Levi if you want to--.” She winked.

“D! Stop it! That’s insane.”

“Why? You’re not dead. Plus, what Shadow doesn’t know--,” she trailed.

This was the kind of trouble Danika was good for. She was like the devil on your shoulder. You knew she’d fooled around on Levi and had heard stories of the fooling around Levi occasionally did when he felt that itch. Neither were stupid, but both were crazy, so they kept their misdealings on the low. You, on the other hand, had never fooled around behind Pablo’s back. You never had a reason to.

As your eyes met the gorgeous stranger’s again, you bit your bottom lip. Until now, you thought. You caught the eye of Pablo walking back to the table. Leo was still beside him, yapping away, but he also had two other men surrounding him. he was still talking shop. Annoyance flared through you with a vengeance. Danika walked to Levi and sat on his lap before her lips met his. You walked back to the table and sat. You felt his eyes on you with every step you took.

You sat beside Pablo and tried to get past the unexpected thoughts you were having. Five minutes passed, but still, the thoughts persisted. When you looked up, the stranger was again in the shadows. Fuck it, you thought before you stood and took a step.

“Where you going, sweetheart?”

Painting a sugary smile on you responded. “Bathroom, baby.”

Pablo nodded, but you felt him watching you. He was a secure man, but he was a possessive one. You walked through the crowd; all the while sneaking peeks at the stranger. You turned the corner and walked down the dark corridor that led to the bathroom. You knew this club like the back of your hand.

Once inside the bathroom, you stood in front of the mirror and focused on toying with your hair. By the time you got to twelve, the door had opened, and in walked the stranger. You locked eyes from the mirror, and you damn near buckled. He was even more beautiful than you thought. His eyes were so brown and so damn penetrative that you decided to have his face between your thighs then and there.

As if reading your thoughts, he locked the door and, in the same breath, pushed up behind you. You could feel his hardness pressing into your ass. His hands gripped your body, one at your breast, the other at your hip. The way he held you felt possessive like he owned you. The only one to have ever held you like that was Pablo. This was a man who knew what he wanted and took it. Pablo was that caliber of a man as well. It was intoxicating.

His lips fastened onto your neck and immediately found your spot. When you felt his teeth graze your skin, you pulled away and glared at him through the mirror. Another smirk spread across his face. In seconds he’d had you turned around so you faced him. When his lips crashed to yours, he wasted no time delving his tongue into your mouth. Almost instantly, he took control of the kiss, and almost instantly, your lacy thong was drenched.

As if sensing this, you felt his fingers graze your inner thigh until it connected with your sex. You gasped on his mouth, which permitted him even more access to your mouth. Fuck, you thought. You were losing control of this situation. Pulling your lips from his, you looked at him. The fire in his eyes had heat rushing through you. You watched as he slipped his fingers into his mouth and sucked your juices off. Once his fingers were clean, he moaned.

“You’re as sweet as you look.”

Grabbing his shirt, you pulled him to you, but instead of claiming his lips, you began pushing his head lower. He knew what you wanted. In seconds he hoisted you into his arms and began lifting you higher into the air as if you weighed an ounce. One he’d placed you on his shoulders, he used his teeth to pull your thong to the side before he began his feast.

“Fuck!”

Slapping your hand across your mouth, you groaned and mumbled another curse into your palm. It was clear from the start he had no intention of going slow. The fast flicks of his tongue had your back arching, and the soft nibbles he dropped in had your free hand tangling in his hair. When you felt your back press onto the cold surface of the bathroom, you moaned again. You didn’t dare remove your hand from your mouth. You didn’t trust yourself. The stranger between your legs used both his hands and pried your thighs apart, so he was holding you against the wall spread like French doors.

The thick pad of his tongue slowly licked you from opening to clit. When he got to your clit he sucked it into his mouth. He wasn’t gentle, and the increase in suction had you feeling the first stirs of your orgasm.

“Yes, yes, right there. Fuck! Oh my god!”

Feeling a scream coming, you plastered both your hands across your mouth to lessen the volume. He dipped his tongue into your core, and you lost your shit right then and there. When you began shaking, he didn’t slow down. He picked up the pace. You couldn’t believe someone could fuck a pussy with their tongue so quickly. After every three or four dips, he sucked your clit into his mouth as if he was a hoover vacuum.

Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, and you knew you were seconds from coming. Without warning, you gripped his head and hugged it to your sex as you came. He moaned and slurped your flesh, accepting every drop you gave.

“Shit, shit, Shiiiit!”

If anyone busted the door down, you would have the hardest time explaining this away. There would be no way. Slowly his lips and tongue slowed their devil work, allowing you to come down. As if to keep you on your toes, he nibbled your clit every so often. The action always had you gasping, gripping his hair tighter and arching back every so slightly to finish with a satisfied moan.

When he pulled his face back, his jaw was drenched, and there was a glistening layer of your juices outlining his mouth.

“A man could get drunk off this sweet pussy, sugar lips.”

Jesus Christ, you thought as new wetness with fresh arousal washed through you. His eyes dipped between your legs, and a grin spread across his face.

“Wet for me again already?”

Your gear watched vibrated, indicating you’d gotten a message. Glancing at it, you saw Danika’s message.

MSG D: You have twenty seconds to get back, or your cover is kaput.

“Fuck,” you groaned under your breath as you began wriggling in his arms.

He lowered you to the floor then stepped back, giving you a little space. You fixed yourself as best you could and tried to ignore the wetness between your legs.

“I take it reciprocity is dead.”

You looked at him and dropped your eyes to see him holding his crotch. He was mouthwateringly hard. Part of you wanted to see what he was concealing behind those pants, but if you were caught, you knew Pablo would beat him to a pulp or worse.

“Unfortunately, there’s no time. Thank you though, I really needed that.”

You walked to the door, and as you passed him, you gently tapped his cheek.

“Glad I could be of service.”

You quickly rushed out the bathroom, and down the corridor, you’d walked down back to the main hall of the club. As you rounded the corner, you met three of Pablo’s men.

“Everything okay?”

“Perfect,” you answered with a smile before you pushed past them to make your way back over to Pablo, relishing in the decrease of tension in your body. It had been too long, indeed.

The rest of the night progressed as it usually did. Pablo finished up the business thirty or so minutes before you left. The beautiful stranger with the skillful mouth was nowhere to be found. The two of you then made your way home. While in the car, Pablo’s hand found the space between your thighs.

“I’m sorry about tonight.”

“You know if work is the only important thing to you, then maybe we need to have a conversation about where that leaves us.”

His grip tightened, making you flinch.

“Y/N, come on,” Pablo began.

“You haven't touched me in almost two months. If you’re not fucking me, who are you fucking?”

Your words were laced with hidden poison. He knew it. Instead of speaking again, you both remained silent.

When the car pulled up to your half a block townhouse, you walked ahead of him as he got updates from his men posted around the property. You were still pretty relaxed from your bathroom tryst, but you were angry with him as well. Once you made it to your shared bedroom, you stripped and got into the shower.

A little less than halfway through, you felt Pablo’s hands around your midsection. Ignoring him, you continued soaping your body and paid no mind to his growing appendage that was pressing into your back. When you were out of heels, he towered over you like a giant. He kissed your neck and down to your shoulder then brought his lips back to your neck. He knew what he was doing, and he knew you knew as well.

Pablo’s hand crept down your stomach to where your thighs met.

“Pablo--,” you warned.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I know I’ve been neglecting you. I’m sorry.”

Slowly his finger circled your clit, and it didn’t take long for your desire for him to unfurl.

“Let me make it up to you,” Pablo whispered before he turned you to him. he kissed you with heat, passion, and intensity, all of which you felt tonight in that bathroom. In seconds Pablo had lifted you into his arms to his height and lowered you onto his throbbing cock.

Both of you sighed, but the moment of savoring was short. Pablo took control of your body, moving you along his length with expert strength. People didn’t fear him for no reason. He was a beast of a man in stature and disposition. What started as slow deep strokes turned to frenzied shallow thrusts. You knew then this was not going to be a tender reacquaintance of your bodies. It was going to be the opposite.

Pablo pressed you against the tile of the shower and dipped his tongue into your mouth to entangle with yours. His kiss commanded your surrender. You knew when you gave in, you wouldn’t be disappointed, so you did. Pablo groaned once he felt your surrender. It was then he sunk into your heat to the hilt. The scream you let out was loud, and it only fueled him further.

Pablo pounded into you. Each time your bodies connected, the force of his stroke had your body bouncing up only to drop back onto his searing cock.

“Fuuuuuck, daddy!”

A growl escaped him before he turned and walked out of the shower to bring you back to your bed. When he dropped you onto the sheets, he flipped you onto your stomach and slammed back into you.

“Aaaah!”

“Mmm. Daddy missed you, sweetheart!”

His voice was tender, but the way he pummeled your pussy spoke of something else. He was on a mission.

“Don’t ever say that shit to me again. do you understand?”

No words. Not liking it, he grabbed the back of your neck and pulled you back so your back had the perfect inward arch.

“I can’t hear you, sweetheart. Do you—understand?”

You vigorously nodded. He was so deep you couldn’t muster any words.

“Words, Y/N.”

“Yes, daddy. Yes!”

“Good girl.”

As if this was a reward for your compliance, he rotated his hips, so you felt every inch of his desire as it marked every crevice inside of you. You doubted anyone had ever made you feel this good.

Your moans, pants, and groans melded together. The sounds filled your room, and you knew anyone outside could hear you. It turned Pablo on even more to know that everyone could hear how good he was fucking you. You didn’t care who knew how good he made you feel. When he began jackhammering into you, you saw stars and clenched around him as your orgasm violently ripped through you.

“Fuck me!”

On command, he did just that to the point where you became hoarse, and you didn’t know what day it was. When you couldn’t take another orgasm, you dropped to the bed, but Pablo kept plowing into you. His stoked became sloppy, and you knew he was close. When he came, he grunted loudly, nearly terrifying you with the loudness of it. He thrust forward as if he were trying to rip you apart. The feel of his love inside of your canal nudged you over the edge to your final release. Pablo dropped kisses along your back before he rolled off of you to lie on his back. That was how the two of you fell asleep. Both too exhausted to even cover yourselves.

The next day when you woke up, your body hummed with satisfaction. After checking your messages and emails, you took a quick shower and wrapped in one of your robes, then made your way down to breakfast. You were starving. It was a regular sight to see several of Pablo’s men through the house; you never batted an eye to it. Often times, they spoke and nodded their heads in respect as you passed, and you always reciprocated that politeness. There was no need to be a bitch.

When you made it to the dining room, you saw Pablo already sitting there. When he saw you, he smiled softly. You walked over to him and bent, placing a sweet kiss on his lips. When you began to back away, he dropped his hand to your ass and held you there to deepen the kiss. You both moaned quickly, getting lost in each other. All was forgiven.

“Good morning, sweetheart.”

“Good morning, baby.” Pablo kissed you once more, and as you were moving to the seat beside him, he pulled you to the space in front of him on the table. Your ass had the china clattering loudly.

“What’re you doing?”

“I’m hungry.”

That was all he said before he pushed you back onto the table and spread your thighs.

“Pablo--,” you began before the rest of your sentence fluttered away once his lips connected with your sex.

A soft moan escaped you, and any protest faded. You rested on your elbows and enjoyed the feel of him between your thighs.

“Mmmm, yes, baby. Fuck, that feels so good.”

Pablo knew just what to do to set you on fire and what to do to tease you. he was in the mood to tease you. After a few minutes of teasing, you wanted more and had no problem letting him know. You gripped his head, held his hair, and began rocking your sex across his mouth. Pablo moaned and allowed you to use his face to your delight. Every few swipes, he slurped your flesh, sending shivers through your body and bringing you closer and closer to your orgasm.

“Mmm, yes, daddy, right there.” You looked at him, and your eyes met. The man was temptation. His hand crept up to grip your breast as he forcefully sucked your clit into his mouth.

The action had you remembering the bathroom at the club.

“Mmm, shit, baby. You’re gonna make me come.”

You bucked across his mouth and closed your eyes to fully enjoy the pleasure he was giving you. In a matter of seconds, Pablo’s intent shifted from teasing, and seconds later, you were coming. He moaned and lapped up every drop.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!”

“Wow, when you said to come over for breakfast, I thought you meant pancakes and eggs, not sugar and spice.”

Your eyes flew open at the new voice. From upside down, you couldn’t believe your eyes. You closed them and opened again, but the sight was the same.

“Around here, sugar and spice is the only thing ever on the menu,” Pablo replied.

He kissed your inner thigh then tapped it. Snapping out of your frozen state, you sat up, fixed yourself, and chanced a look back. As sure as the sun was shining, the stranger from last night was standing at the other end of the table with a satisfied grin on his face.

“You took your time getting over here,” Pablo said as he walked over to him.

You watched the two men embrace as manly men did. The whole time you stood there, stunned and speechless. Your boyfriend was chatting up and laughing with the man you’d allowed to bury his face between your thighs.

“Come here, sweetheart.”

On shaky legs, you walked to the two men, all the while gripping the collar of your robe.

“Y/N, meet my best friend, the one man I trust with everything next to Levi,” Pablo informed. With every word, your eyes widened.

The stranger held his hand out to you with a smile. “Lewis,” he said.

Fighting the shock, you took his hand and shook it. “Although the pleasure is all yours, I’m glad to finally meet you,” Lewis teased. You knew his words had a double meaning. Instead of speaking of it being nice to meet him too, the only thing in your head was the repetitive thought.

You’re fucked.

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Lee’s Note: Hopefully this was good, I’m still trying to find my groove again. How was this intro to Lewis and Pablo? 😬

#shadow & smoke fic #pablo schreiber #pablo schreiber fanfiction #lewis tan #lewis tan fanfiction #black fanfiction #smut

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rumpledgoldenweaver · 4 years ago

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A Weekend Away

Written for the @a-monthly-rumbelling February prompt “I think we’re lost”. Also @fluffapalooza if it’s still open :) Read it on my blog: https://earlyrisingwriting.home.blog/2021/02/14/a-weekend-away/

An opportunity arises for the Gold Boys to spend time together away from Storybrooke’s prying eyes.

Malcolm Gold – he’d adopted his son’s cursed surname, Stiltskin didn’t seem right, it only served to remind him of the anger he’d felt when naming his baby boy. He didn’t want anything to do with the name Peter Pan any more, Gold was a fresh start – was beginning to rue the day he’d agreed to joining his rapidly expanding family for a weekend at Rumple’s forest cabin. It’s like the tree houses in Neverland Neal had explained but on the ground. It’ll be fun Papa, his son had told him through obviously gritted teeth, Malcolm hadn’t missed the discreet elbow to the ribs Rumple had taken from Belle as she’d added that it would be an opportunity to talk away from the scrutiny of the towns folk. Henry had kept a commendable straight face at that remark considering she was referring to at least half of his family. Malcolm liked Belle. She was honest, trusting but not to be crossed. Just what his son needed to keep him in line. It was mainly because of her he’d agreed to come along.

Malcolm had also been grateful to Belle for her advice regarding clothing in this new land. Although Rumple’s suits looked sharp, he didn’t want that many layers. Neal’s clothes were a bit too casual so he settled on trousers Henry had called Chinos, shirts with buttons, thin jumpers and boots called Timberland. Today he was particularly glad of the boots. Rumple had used magic to transport all the necessary clothes, food etc to the cabin, leaving Malcolm, Neal and Henry free to arrive on foot. Henry had been so excited at the thought of a hike through the forest with his Dad, no one had the heart to object.

“I think we’re lost” Malcolm tried to get his bearings however the trees all looked the same, he had no idea how far into the the forest they were.

“Lost Boys” sniggered Neal. Henry snorted which made his father laugh even more.

“Following the leader, the leader, the leader” sang Henry “We’re following the leader…”

“Wherever he may go” Neal joined in, the two of them dancing round in a circle.

“Very funny”

“You have no idea” laughed Neal “Have you seen the Disney film about Peter Pan yet?”

“The what?” Malcolm was still bemused by the popular cultures of the world he now lived in even though he’d got a better grasp of how it actually worked.

Henry grinned the kind of wicked grin Rumple would have been proud of “You’ll love it Gramps, especially Hook”

Neal’s eyebrows rose at the use of Gramps in relation to Malcolm

“What? I call Rumple Grandpa and Malcolm didn’t like Great Grandpa so Mum suggested Gramps”

“Which Mum?” though Neal had his suspicions

Henry didn’t answer but the glint in his eye was enough. Emma had an evil sense of humour.

“One of you must have been to this cabin before?”

“Neal shook his head “I arrived in town not long before the trip to Neverland but Papa and I weren’t exactly on friendly terms back then”

“I haven’t been either, I didn’t know Grandpa was my Grandpa and my mums weren’t about to let me hang out with The Dark One”

“Wonderful”

Neal looked around for minute or two, then as if some secret signal had been given he made an abrupt turn and set off down a path “Come on. It’s this way”

“Rumple will you please stop fussing. We have enough food to survive a small siege. There is no need to summon more”

“Have you ever fed a twelve year old boy? If his appetite is anything like Bae’s at that age then…” he felt a lump rise in his throat.

“Rumple?”

“Then I want to make sure there’s plenty”

“Oh Rumple” she hugged him hoping to both reassure and pull him out of this melancholy. He pulled her closer, nuzzling her hair, whispering a thank you sweetheart. Belle moved to kiss him and for the next couple of minutes there was a feeling of peace between them.

“Hi Grandpa Hi Belle sorry we’re.. oh…” Henry looked embarrassed at interrupting. Belle giggled, Rumple never even turned round as he replied “Hi Henry”

“Are they here?” Neal’s voice carried through the door.

“Er...yes…they are.. here…”

“Is something up?” Neal strode into the living room and stopped dead “Oh for pities sake you two get a room!”

Rumple did turn this time “This is my cabin Bae and my room”

“Not in front of the wee ones eh Laddie?” Malcolm chuckled.

“Indeed”

“Rumple..” there was a warning tone to Belle’s voice “remember what we talked about”

“Hmm”

Ever the diplomat Henry piped up “Is there anything to eat? I’m starving”

“Yes of course Henry” smiled Belle “in the kitchen”

The young boy disappeared, returning within five minutes carrying a plate loaded with burger, fries, onion rings, various dips and salad. Rumple gave Belle a told you so look.

“He obviously appreciates his food” Malcolm watched in amusement at Henry giving the burger his full attention.

“Takes after his father” Rumple nodded towards Neal as he too went to the kitchen and brought back a plate piled high.

Conversation remained light hearted as they ate, comments about both Neal and Henry having hollow legs because of their hearty appetites. Rumple found he was nearly enjoying himself. Nearly being better than not at all as Belle reminded him earlier.

“Where on earth did all the food come from anyway?” Malcolm asked as he debated which of the many desserts to try.

“I summoned it” Rumple replied reaching for a cupcake.

“Magic” Neal raised a suspicions eyebrow.

“Only to bring it here. It’s not magic food. I’ve paid Granny’s chef triple his wages to cook a steady supply especially for us”

“Fair enough” Neal took a satisfied mouthful of cake.

“More tea anyone?” Belle stood up and began collecting the various cups and mugs strewn around the room

“Coffee if you have it please”

“Of course Bae, I’ll put the pot on. Coffee has it’s own magic Dearie” he twirled his arms, turned on his heel and practically skipped out after Belle.

The expression on Henry’s face was priceless.

When everyone had eaten their fill, plates, cups and cutlery washed, dried and put away by hand not magic Rumple keenly pointed out, Henry suggested they watch a film. Malcolm being particularly interested in the idea of a a “moving book” being shown on something called a TV screen. Then began the debate over which one to put on. Whilst there wasn’t a great deal of choice amongst the DVD’s at the cabin, Rumple would be happy to summon whichever was decided on. Mostly it was left to Neal and Henry as they had the widest knowledge of such things. It seemed to Malcolm to be a very complicated process.

“Nothing over a PG”

“Awww Dad! I’m twelve! I can watch..”

“No. Your Mothers would find a hundred ways to kill me, bring me back to life and kill me all over again if they found out you’d watched anything remotely inappropriate”

“Grandpa would protect you”

“Oh no no no” laughed Rumple “Do not bring me into this. I argued with both of them over many things but even I have limits”

“What about that.. Disney thing you mentioned on the way here? Would that be allowable?”

All eyes turned to Malcolm.

“You mean Peter Pan?” Henry looked sceptical.

“Yeah.. that. I’d like to see it”

Rumple and Belle exchanged a look before he got up and went into the main bedroom. There followed the sound of keys turning in locks and a safe being opened.

“You keep Disney DVD’s in a vault Papa?”

“Along with a few other items I was unsure about at first yes”

“Such as?”

“Such as none of your business son” he walked back into the living room brandishing the disc “You can do the honours Bae”

It could, Belle mused to herself long after everyone else had retired for the night, have gone a lot worse. For instance everyone agreed that the physical resemblance between the cartoon and the person was actually rather accurate. They had all laughed like drains at Captain Hook. Belle honestly thought she’d have to give medical attention to Rumple and Malcolm as their hysterics gave way to mighty coughing fits. Neal and Henry sang along with the songs, Never Smile At A Crocodile didn’t go down very well with Rumple at first but he saw the funny side in the end. When it came to Following The Leader, the youngest father and son immediately leapt to their feet and began dancing round the room in a repeat of their antics in the forest earlier.

“So that’s where that song came from” groused Malcolm.

There seemed to be an unspoken agreement to not discuss certain details regarding film versus real life, for that Belle was grateful. She knew the relationships in that room were complicated, messy, quite possibly very unhealthy and could keep Archie Hopper on Rumple’s pay roll for decades. Whilst she believed talking about these issues was healthy, this weekend was not the time or the place. For once no one was arguing, for once certain townsfolk weren’t around to stick their well intentioned (or otherwise) noses in. She wondered if inviting her own father for a weekend here might help ease tensions between him and her boyfriend. Maybe leave it a month or so before she suggested that.

“What are you smirking at?” Rumple came from the en suite, pulled the bed covers back and climbed in bed beside her. Her eyes gleamed with mischief.

“Don’t you dare Belle” he warned, which was the wrong thing to say because of course she dared.

“Never smile at a crocodile..”

“I’m warning you young lady”

“No you can’t get friendly with a crocodile…” she sang between giggles.

“Right then”

And he proceeded to show her how friendly crocodiles could be when they wanted to.

#a monthly rumbelling #fluffapalooza 2021 #february prompt #gold family fic #gold boys fic

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courage-a-word-of-justice · 4 years ago

Text

After much watching...I cut it down to 5 anime and 1 short.

Suppose a Kid… 1

I am not writing out that full title every time! Anyways, here’s the first “real” debut of winter 2021.

For some reason…this series reminds me of Pokemon. Probably how at the start, Ash tries to get along with Pikachu by doing all sorts of things like what Lloyd is doing here. (<- learnt protag’s name through synopses)

The name “Shouma” rang a bell and I was right – Shouma is voiced by Souma…Saito.

The Japanese title has “monogatari” on the end there…so it probably doesn’t fully translate into the English title.

These orange flecks in Lloyd’s eyes are kinda distracting…

Isn’t Kunlun in China, though…?

If this is just going to be Marie yelling…I don’t see why I should stay. (<- turned volume on for everything so far)

*facepalms* Lloyd is so dense…

That fight scene’s not very good…

…oh great. Selen’s fallen in love with Lloyd already…*sigh*

The missing princess is certainly going to be a plot point later.

Wow, that tiger looks impressive! If only they could’ve done that for the fight scene…

…oh great, Selen is a low-key yandere…

Didn’t Lloyd say he sucked at combat…? Anyways, I’m not keeping this. The designs are colourful and the tiger was good, but it’s meant to be a comedy and it’s not funny.

Hortensia Saga 1

Here for Ume! He’s voicing a guy called Defloitte Danois.

I-Is that CGI? So early on into the anime???

*a dude gets bitten into by the werewolf*…welp, at least this series isn’t afraid of its own gore.

I had a sinking feeling our real protag was Alfred…and I was right, according to the OP.

Huh? The song goes silent for a second near the end…what the heck?

The book appears to use English, albeit English so faintly inked in you can’t quite tell what language it is.

Alfred, governing Albert…? Isn’t that a bit redundant?

I swear all the female voices in this anime are squeaky as all get out…

All these high fantasy anime – or heck, any high fantasy series full stop – ever justify why the country is worth fighting for. It’s why I find war stories pointless and senseless.

You can tell from the voice and short stature “Marius” is Mariel…but she uses boku, which is why Alfred can’t really tell the difference. (Also, he wasn’t privy to the fact Mariel cut her hair.)

This almost smacks of a game tutorial. The CGI is still there…it’s not as bad as other examples I’ve seen, but you can tell it’s CGI when you look at it.

Roy’s kind of pretty, in a generic way.

A close-range archer! Ho, you’re kinda impressive yourself, Roy. (The feeling of a game tutorial has disappeared by this point.)

Hortense…of Hortensia…how confusing.

The scruffy guy you keep seeing with the dark hair is Defloitte. Keep an eye out for him for me, would you?

The ED seems to consist mostly of…anguished pop screams. *cringes slightly*

Anyways, this anime isn’t bad. It’s quite average though and its CGI could easily get worse.

Kumo Desu ga 1

…you know I don’t like 1st person cam, yeah?

…this is just Kumoko (as I’ve heard her being called) yelling so far…plus there’s quite a bit of CGI.

I like how the ED has an English overlay and the style they’ve used for it. The music, though…? Nah.

Wait a second? Millepensee? Shin Itagaki? That would explain the CGI!

“…a spider that just happens to have my memories.” – A butterfly dream, huh?

…well, at least this anime is well aware of the genre space it inhabits. Maybe you could say…it’s an isekai light novel, so what? *groans from the audience*

…well, you didn’t really “bring” your “brother’s” (?) corpse in case of an emergency, now, did you?

…welp, to have guts, you must eat guts. I guess that’s how it goes.

What’s a “skanda”?

This anime’s quite monologue-y (as expected of an LN). I can live with it, but I don’t know if it can carry the entire thing through the season.

…humans? Haven’t seen them almost all episode. What are they up to?

These designs sort of look like SAO’s. They’re not a dealbreaker yet, but they could be down the line…

This ED seems to take cues from Cop Craft’s OP (same studio). It also has some…“Aggretsuko rage”, I guess you could call it.

2.43 1

…Another confusing title, I see. I normally don’t do sports anime, but I’m here for Ume.

*sees the colour of the volleyball* - Basically anything volleyball has to collaborate with volleyball maker Mikasa, doesn’t it?

This anime seems to like putting characters’ thoughts on the screen for dramatic impact. The CGI is sort of visible, but not a dealbreaker.

I’d thought I’d heard of this OP artist before, but it turns out I haven’t.

This series has a nice sense of force. You see those moments where the ball squishes, or when Yuni presses against the wall without thinking? Those.

LOL, way to burn Yuni, Chika…

These transitions are a bit hard to detect. I think I like Akudama’s more overt ones more.

LOL, Dr Popper (sic).

The serves are nothing special. Haikyuu does the same thing from the episode I saw of it. (You know I don’t like Haikyuu, yeah? Dropped it after 1 episode because everything I heard the fans talking about caused me to connect the dots.)

The way Yuni blushes…it’s more than someone usually would, even if it is out of embarrassment. It may just be the entertainment I consume, but I could swear that’s going somewhere in more of a BL manner.

I get the feeling Chika has a bit of Virgo or Taurus in him somewhere. The sort of guy who nags at everyone to do stuff his way is probably like that.

Pocari Sweat (unaltered).

I gave myself dimples by puffing up my cheeks and poking them until they became permanent. I guess you can do the same thing with ambidexterity…?

For some reason, I can detect Chika’s jealousy when he discusses blocks and natural talent.

…wow, this anime is pretty serious for a volleyball anime.

The ED scene where the face is replaced with flowers is pretty creepy. Like Jigokuraku or something.

Cells at Work!! 1

What are these blob creatures you see in the OP, anyway…?

I think I remember reading something that the numbers assigned to the cells aren’t arbitrary – they’re hexadecimal colors, e.g. RBCs get shades of red as their numbers.

D’aww, Platelets warm the heart. They really do.

Platelets have a master…? I thought they were all just lil’ kids.

“What the cell’s going on?!” – Oh, I remember seeing a tweet about this. I love that pun! Kudos to whoever was responsible for that.

LOL, no. 4989 dancing in the background.

Hmm…those nets look like CGI.

…uh, I did not need that shot of the Megakaryocyte’s camel toe…that’s distubring.

Wait, Backward Cap is a she?!

Aw, lookit WBC being a dad. That’s cute.

Backward Cap = Ushiromae-chan.

Is that…a construction worker holding a giant pudding?!

Cells at Work Code Black 1

This anime is called “black” due to black companies. It’s Code Black to avoid being racist, I guess. I’m looking forward to it because it’s undoubtedly going to show a dark side to the main series…

…and there it is, the RBC complaining.

I assume OJT = on the job training.

I knew “pespin” (sic) was a typo. It’s pepsin.

Now that I’ve been working at customer service for two years (give or take COVID), I can see where the senpai RBC is smoothing over the relations.

…that also means I know where to suppress my emotions. I’m not a person who opens up to people easily without getting used to them, so people never see me as suitable for customer service anyway, but it’s the only experience I have so *shrugs*.

…oh gosh. I haven’t seen these words since…the time I was still learning biology.

…*sigh* Rookie RBC is worried about boobs.

The fact Senpai lost his iconic hat…is kinda sad, actually.

“Don’t let his resolve be for nothing.”

Hmm…does the male WBC from the main series wear black fingerless gloves?

I thought I’d heard of this artist before…but turns out I just can’t distinguish really autotuned artists from each other…(lel)

…and stuff goes ka-blam. It’s the spiritual successor to HypMic, even if I wasn’t asking for it. (LOL)

Back Arrow 1

…I heard you said “hot guys”? (Yes, I am predictable as all get out.)

What’s with that episode title…?

Stereotypes, eh? I kind of expected as much from the promo, but where’s the title character…?

…was that yuri fanservice? I can’t quite tell because it was the aftermath of an action scene, but I can see the shippers gearing up in my head.

…after a bit of waiting, there he is. Back Arrow himself. He kind looks like Takuto (Star Driver).

“I’m not trying to hide anything!” – Well, that’s…true.

…*sigh* Why do girls always have more feminine-looking mechs? (Plus this one has boobs…*sighhhhhhhhhhhh*)

So it seems mechs in this anime are the form of one’s conviction and they have skills along those lines, eh? An interesting concept.

…you do realise I abandoned an entire anime based on a joke about lucky underwear? However, this anime is so absurd and just keeps running with the joke that I just can’t say no to it. If there’s one thing I’ve learnt from volunteering at a charity store, it’s that when it comes to selling stuff, you can’t say no to a lot of stuff…including selling potentially used underwear, so long as it’s not dirty or stinky.

Whoa! Those things break?!

Why does the title card mention the wall...?

Anyways, I…like it, surprisingly enough. Let’s keep going.

Back Arrow 2

…eh? Didn’t expect inflatable clothing, LOL.

I suspect Shu Bi is scheming something.

What’s the long thing…?

“…tomorrow might not come.” – A good reminder to have in these times of COVID.

Peath = Peace. (Heh. What a stupid name…*thinks about the name “Quattro Bajeena” suddenly* Okay, “Peath” pales in comparison to that.)

What is that creature that circles in the sky…?

I know this is meant to be a serious fight, but…that attacking guy’s hat seriously looks like a bamboo stalk and so I keep seeing it and trying not to laugh.

I only just now realised there’s CGI. CGI these days is getting much better than it used to be.

Tomozaki 1

LOL, Yontendo. It’s clearly Smash Bros + Nintendo Switch and the character designer was also around for Iroduku, so that’s why this style looks familiar.

…lemme guess, since this is a romance, it’s likely NONAME is Aoi. Or some other girl.

I would pay for a romance where it’s the girl building the guy up to be presentable, instead of a girl building other girls up to be presentable a la Ageha 100%.

Didn’t the anime show us Tomozaki reflecting to himself, though…?

“…rules working in combination.” - Well, there’s social norms (e.g. knock before entering a room), laws, contracts, societal standards (e.g. in Japanese society, you bow to others as a greeting or apology)…(continues to blabber on for a bit)

I think Aoi said something like “onitadaku”, but I’m not sure what the joke is there. Oni is in there, sure, but what’s the original phrase she’s playing off?

…LOL, it’s a good time to remind people to wear a mask.

LOL, Krout.

Anyways, this seems decent. I like how it’s going the way I want it to.

Tomozaki 2

“…make sure I’m nearby…” – Okay, that’s just being pushy, Aoi.

Minami and Hinami…so confusing…

*Minami chomps on Natsubayashi’s ear* - …okay, that’s not a thing girls do in real life unless they’re lesbians. This is likely trying to take the fanservice route.

They didn’t even show why the “kiss” was broken up…meaning they were doing it to make potential girl-on-girl look hot. Just great.

*Aoi touches Tomozaki’s butt* - Dude, that’s groping…

I didn’t think we’d get the story on Aoi’s “hexactly” so soon.

…well, that episode just made me feel mildly bitter. I’m dropping it here.

Praeter 1

…aw s***. Only a few seconds in and this looks like a terrible game…

It’s like someone barfed paint across Durarara…

The only time the background buildings look any good are when there’s a fight scene…

These Seals (or whatever those designs are called) seem to act like mini shields. Update: They’re called tattoos.

That transition was a bit fast for my liking…

Seems like the series is mildly peppered with Greek terms.

“To Infinity and Beyond” by…some author I can’t really read the name of.

Suddenly, they throw in more characters…?

Where does Eiji keep those bullet cases of his…? In his jacket?

Having a guy die in the 1st episode is cheap. I mean, we don’t quite care for him yet – it’s too early in the anime for that.

Now there’s Norse terms on top of the Greek ones…

Even more characters? You kidding me?

Lemme guess, Eiji gave up his tattoo because Yamato inspired him and now he’s a goner.

Welp, the weight of the world is in your hands, Yamato. Including that dead dude on your back. (<- sarcastic)

Sk8 1

I’ve been hearing good things about this anime! Let’s go! (<- about a week late to the debut)

That politician is probably relevant…probably someone’s dad, if HypMic taught me anything.

LOL, a beef. They call this stuff “beef”? Where’s the chicken? (<- joke from HypMic)

Haemanthus…apparently a flowering plant from S. Africa.

That’s rare, you don’t see Canadians in anime all that much. I was just thinking as I came home from volunteering how you know British people all have fancy names like William and Australians are Johnno, Danno etc., but Canadians? No clue. Update: Apparently you’d call one Arnold or something just as generic…?

Why are all foreigners in anime half-Japanese with the mother being the Japanese side, anyway?...Because people can make their character speak Japanese while looking foreign. Right. Moving right along.

Ahh…I understand your plight all too well, Reki.

…Hmm. It seems Reki’s surname is written kiya, but read “Kyan”. His name literally translates to “history (calendar/age) of bravery (military might)” Update: Turns out his surname is 3 characters (read “kiyan”, although I’ve never seen that final character ever being read as “n”) and his first name is one, so his first name is just “history (calendar/age)”.

Even I suck at balancing on bikes and stuff (…yeah, I still can’t ride a bike even though I’ve done so many other things in my life) and I know you have to support yourself with one foot on the ground before you do things like trick flips. I may not have observed Tony Hawk all that much, but he was on the periphery of my knowledge.

“What’s your hourly wage?” – Ouch, I feel ya, Langa.

Koko ni netete actually means “Lie down here”, but…okay.

These eyecatches are cute.

That’s a cute fox.

Yikes! 60 mph = approx. 97 km/h!!!

Random umeboshi, LOL.

Aghhhhhhhhhhh! Cherry Blossom’s so pretty~! I love him already!

Thank you, based Bones!

Something that can be enjoyed, even without sound: this is why I enjoy both action and comedy anime!

Okinawa? We’re in Okinawa?

Well, that was cool! I didn’t even ask where the location was until the end. Update: Why is this anime sometimes called Sk8 the Infinity anyway…?

Horimiya 1

Horimiya…I’ve been aware of this series for a while. There’s even a Chinese volume of it at a library close to me, although due to contact tracing I haven’t bothered to check it out.

Oh, I bet Hori is the otaku!

Ooh, Marketing Script!

Because I’ve been behind on the premieres, I’ve seen enough to know this boy with the chain is Miyamura.

…argh! Miyamura is cute! Y’all were right!!! (<- likes blushing bois)

I bet there’s going to be an emergency meeting!

“Sorry, it’s egg time!” – Oh, I’m laughing so hard! So that’s the context behind the Wonder Egg Priority meme!

“…see these?!” – Well, it’s not like you have a tattoo or some-*Miyamura shows his tattoos* Never mind…

Oh, I just realised they even animate the minute movements of the eyes Miyamura does…cool.

Notice how Miyamura is blocked from the other guy due to the window.

Miyamura goes “Ishikawa-kun” but “Hori-san”…hmm. No wonder he’s letting Ishikawa get Hori.

The problem I find with romance series is that they’re generally tied to heteronormativity. Hori is coded with red silhouettes and Miyamura with blue…*sigh* Whatever happened to gender ambiguity?

Good heavens, what is up with this ED?! It looks like Pocoyo! (…Does anyone else know that cartoon…?) Aside from that quibble, this anime is great though.

Mushoku Tensei 1

Apparently this is the grandad of all isekai. Why it took so long for an anime of this…who knows?

…and of course this guy’s a loser virgin. Go figure.

*sighhhhhhhhh* He’s just ogling this woman’s boobs…

…oh, sorry. I was so distracted by the man candy, I didn’t care about Rudy.

I-It’s actually quite refreshing to not have an OP protagonist from the get-go for once. (Or maybe I’ve developed such a disdain for isekai since SAO rolled around that everything here suddenly feels fresh.)

You can see the birthplace of isekai without having watched any of the others right here, it looks like.

“…what’s the point of incantations?” – To make it easier for you to cast spells, I gue-spoke too soon.

…wow, they shamelessly showed off Rudy’s privates. I know he’s still young at this stage, but that reminds me of how I dropped Dragon Ball around the time Goku was shown the same way (which is…very early on, by my own admission).

I believe, based on the name of the spinoff I see in the 7 Seas emails, the magic tutor is called Roxy.

You’re thinking about marriage?! At your (reincarnated) age?!

Oh no! The tree again!

LOL, Rudy’s acting like a kid who’s been in COVID lockdown for a while.

I think what most of the isekai that spun off from here missed is that the loser is job age. Losers at life at job age are relatable and high school geniuses are relatable (albeit sometimes insufferable), but losers who become NEETs for no reason whatsoever and then get banged up by Truck-kun are not.

Anyways, this was good, but a risky kind of good, since it seems like this male gaze will continue to be around as Rudy gets older.

Update: Dropped after learning Rudy was a paedophile in his past life.

Update 2: Apparently the anime toned down this paedophilic tendency of Rudy’s, so...now the verdict is that I move on while I let other people tell me if this is true of the anime or not.

Kemono Jihen 1

“Kemono Jihen” means something like “creature incidents”. I wonder why Funimation didn’t change the name…?

Kabane means “summer wing”.

Kanoko Villa, I’d assume, is named after the deer (the name means “deer’s child”).

My experience with Sho Aimoto (creator of this manga) is reading a bit of Hokenshitsu no Shinigami. (That, by the way, reminds me of Nube, but it’s nothing spectacular.) However, Hokenshitsu no Shinigami has a very detailed artstyle…That’s why I’m pretty shocked Kemono Jihen has such a scratchy one…

Ooh, edamame!

Oh, I see…this is like Furuba or a werewolf story, huh? Rather than a Natsume Yuujincho sort of thing.

…I thought Inugami and Dorotabo had seen everything of each other because of bathing together…I guess not, then.

…is Yataro going to die?

It seems the “immortal demons” are oni, so…why subtitle them as “immortal demons” and not just “demons”?

Ohhhhhhhh…this shite’s good. It seems to have a throwback feeling to it, moreso than even Yashahime or a lot of the sequels I’ve seen recently.

Cells at Work!! 2

I was going to move right along to Wonder Egg Priority because I’m really behind on the debuts right now, but I accidentally opened this up while I was cleaning up so I might as well watch another episode or two before setting it aside.

He’s dead, Jim. (<-joking)

…gosh, these walls look like Hover all over again and that’s from 1995…

LOL, these background cells don’t even have any details. They’re basically stick figures with fat bodies…

I think that phrase that appeared, “Take good care of B Cell!”, may be a pun on Give My Regards to Black Jack (written with similar Japanese, “B Cell wo Yoroshiku!” vs. “Black Jack ni Yoroshiku!”).

LOL, “you sure have the guts”…while they’re in the guts.

The certificate says something about it being presented to someone in the face of bravery, I think (<- just looked at it briefly).

“You have a good head on your shoulders,” says the T cell as WBC struggles with the disguise…stuck on his head.

Wonder Egg Priority 1

I’ve been hearing this series is surreal, but no more surreal than Flip Flappers. So…I don’t know if I’ll like it or not.

What’s this K?(?96…?

There’s a sunflower on her raincoat…so that’s why I saw a post called “You’re the sunflower”. Personally, that just reminds me of Post Malone.

Those Seeno Evils…they’re CGI, aren’t they?

As Boueibu once said (but I may be paraphrasing here), “nothing is more scary than free”.

…to be honest with you, I haven’t had a best friend for at least 2 years now. I only really feel close to people who are like me and who I have sustained contact with over many years, so I end up cutting contact with people after we part ways and never trying to fix it.

I always find it slightly absurd when anime girls get a little pudgy and go, “I’m so fat!” (See, for instance, the Dumbbell series.) Or, in this case, Ai’s going, “I’m so ugly!” when there’s nothing wrong with her. She’s only a bit different from everyone else due to her heterochromia - she doesn't have any physical or mental difficulties.

IChu 1

Here for Ume and, of course, dem bois. Bring it!

I seem to remember one of the magazines called an “Ichu” “an idol egg” (i.e. a fledgling idol)…More egg puns for me, then.

I found him! Ume! He’s Akira Mitsurugi! Update: Turns out that’s Toshiyuki Toyonaga…Oops. (Ume is actually Lucas from I*B.)

Huh? For a second, I imagined Akira with a dubbed voice. Of course, I could only be dreaming, because idol anime normally don’t get dubs, but…it was interesting to think about.

LOL, “Onsta”.

This Akio-type character is popular lately. The sort who’s timid but has an outstanding talent they themselves might not see.

…uh, but Kocho means “Principal”…?

An idol bear?!

Torahiko is crazy…(Note the tigers. Tora = tiger.)

Specifically, that’s black coffee with no sugar.

As much as I want to keep watching this, I’ll hit pause on it here. There’s much better offerings this season.

YuruCamp s2 1

…grandpa’s writing is so…neat.

*glares at CGI car…*

This OP just doesn’t compare to Shiny Days, y’know…?

OOPArts.

Talking pine cones! They’re back!

Curry rice! Literally had some of the Japanese-style stuff the other day. It was great.

All this talk about jobs…I personally don’t like jobs because I like to work at my own pace (hence one reason why I’m working on being a translator), but…money…I’m jealous, girls.

I’m trying not to rely on the subs for those texts that appear on the screen so that I can keep my reading skills up…I kept up with them for the most part…but then I got distracted by the croquette sign at one point…

“…buy you some local food?” – That’s omiyage, normally translated “souvenirs”. “Local food” actually does make more sense in that gap, though.

…man, I’m jealous that the girls all got jobs suitable for their personalities and everything. Lil’ ol’ antisocial me sucks at retail, even after 2 years.

Design-bu 1

LOL, that man and his bunny. Update: That’s Unabara-san.

…geez, these utaite are everywhere now. I’ve seen 96neko, USSS, Eve and more being more central to anime song creation…

Thise characters in the OP seal (<-the stamp, not the animal) are saiyou, meaning “recruited”, or in this case, “accepted”.

OEM = original equipment manufacturer.

Hrm…you can tell it’s a giraffe by description, but…that “base everything on the horse” is interesting as you could count several things as horse derivatives. Also, the angels’ names are all standard Japanese names with natural components to them (Ueda = upright rice field, Shimoda = frost rice field etc).

Is this pink-themed guy…a guy? Or a crossdresser? Update: That’s Kanamori-san.

I like how the suits have little wing-like flaps. Also the wings on Shimoda’s back.

…I never thought an anime episode would make me so concerned about giraffes.

That guy in the green I remember from the Wave x Tendebu (Heaven’s Design Team) collab, his name is Kimura.

Oh, so there is a bird like that!

The random wiggling the chibis do in these short segments…it’s a bit disorienting. (<-Just a small quibble of mine.)

Oh! Galapagos effect!

Agonistic: “polemical; combative.” I thought they meant “antagonistic”.

Oh man, that punch line was great! It took me a while to get into the spirit of it, but this anime is great!

Update: Oh, that’s where those nature names come from! They’re actually meant to be gods! (Or…named after gods…?) Also, Ueda vs. Shimoda (the “shimo” could be the kanji for “below”).

Ex-Arm 1

I’ve heard this anime looks bad…even well before its debut. How bad? Let’s find out.

*stifles laughter* From the first pan, I know this anime is doomed on my list. Even Praeter was better than this!

*stifles laughter again* This OP really does look as bad as the stuff I was seeing prior to winter 2021! Like a game I shouldn’t take out of my archives! (It’s not as bad as Hover’s graphics, but still…that’s from 1995. Cut it some slack.)

That’s the 2nd Kimura this season…

Yugg is just…ugly. Never try to render elaborate eyelashes in CGI again, people.

Dimension High School was better than this because at least that had puzzles. This is even jankier than that!

Wait, why is Akira 3D when his dad is 2D? It’s not that obvious, but I notice these things. Update: That’s not his dad…but close enough. (That’s his brother.)

…and here comes Truck-kun! (LOL)

This would be good…if it weren’t rendered in the jankiest CGI known to man…

Alma’s gun strike doesn’t have a lot of force to it.

The fire is rendered so terribly…*stifles laughter*

This part with a disembodied Akira is what I assume I got up at 6 am for…but I can’t hear it, due to background noise. Remind me to confirm this later. (Minami’s mouth is rendered so terribly…augh.)

No force to any of these recent motions, either.

LOL, this censorship.

Wave 1

Ever since this project was announced, I’ve been watching developments unfold on Anime News Network. I knew it would get an anime or something similar I could follow…and now here I am. I mentioned in the Sk8 comments I have basically zero knowledge of surfing, so…this is very unexpected, in one sense.

Was that a drone…?

“Wizard of the Waifu Board”?! Are you kidding me?! (LOL)

There seem to be shots where I can see the CGI here, but…anything’s better than Ex-Arm. Let’s say that.

Actually…yappe is a derivative of yabai, meaning “cool” or “crap” (in an ironic sense). So it would probably be better to translate it as “Surfing’s the greatest!” or “Surfing’s the coolest!” Anyways, what I was thinking before I was going to say this was that the waves are so enticingly animated, it feels like a summer anime. Basically the only other anime I’ve ever said that for is Grand Blue.

If I’m understanding where Isokichi’s name comes from right, “iso” is the character for seashore or a rocky beach (磯).

LOL, the teacher just wrote “Show must go on.”

Hayama, Kanagawa. Kanagawa’s capital is Yokohama, so it’s not quite Tokyo, but somewhat close.

“Murphy”? I have zero clue what that means.

Oh, I see. The title is translated that way due to context. Now that I can accept.

I just burst out into laughter when I realised Nalu hasn’t dropped or put down his ukulele once.

BSD Wan! 1

Here comes my past to haunt me…aside from me being a fan of BSD, I’m here because I influenced this series. How so? Once upon a time in the now-distant year of 2016, I was a scanlator for a brief period. Most of the work I’ve done hasn’t influenced the world at large, but this is the most influential manga I had a hand in working on.

Oh no! They’re starting with the dog AU?! (That comes from pretty far into the manga, IIRC. Further than my work was on it, at least.)

It’s Rashomon, but Rashoken (that last bit means “dog”). Hence Ruffshomon.

Basically, they just insert dog-related words everywhere…don’t make me explain every one!

Ouch, I can only imagine how much pain it was to translate Inu Shikkaku. Literally, it’s “No Longer a Dog”, but how would anyone make it in line with the other puns…?

I wasn’t fully aware of how the dog AU was connected to the main Wan series because I haven’t really looked at it after I quit due to aggregators, but…that was a nice fakeout. Also, I was concerned as to whether this was going to be a full-length ep or a short…seems like it’s a 10 minute short, so I have more chances of taking it.

…oh gosh, that pose! I remember it! I worked on this one! (Now that I know it’s a TV short, I won’t cover future episodes, but I want to at least finish this one because I started it.)

I think they added a bit there. I remember Kunikida’s and Yosano’s were in the manga, but not the other members or Fukuzawa going “the wind is smiling” + Kenji working on the roof at the start.

Oh yeahhhhhhhhhhhhh, I remember Rampo. I think I had to approximate how he would say stuff with Pocky in his mouth, but Slug (current scanlator) went the extra mile and stuck food in his mouth to do the same panel.

It seems to make a short ep., they strung a bunch of the chapters together. Also, I don’t think we ever found out what Yosano’s puddle was and that was…probably for the better.

Oh yeah…I think I remember this one.

Now I remember it! I remember having fun explaining what a youkan was.

Whoa, Higuchi scrapped the SFX! That wasn’t in the original…

The ED seems to be an Atsushi cover of Namae wo Yobu yo.

Oh noooooooooooo! The flower gazing episode! That’s the one I remember most, because I was trying to figure out how to translate 移動 while making it smooth-sounding English…(I remember the final result was something like, “Move! Move~!”

Dr Stone: Stone Wars 1

Final debut! Let’s go~!

The last time this series was on the air was about 1 year ago. I can remember that far back…

I like how that recap is framed as Gen talking to the kids.

Senku overcomes every problem with science.

…not much to comment on here.

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toogoodmusic · 4 years ago

Audio

THE TOO GOOD TEN with Drew Louis

Pop singer, songwriter and producer Drew Louis drops his latest release “Petty.” The refreshing new single is dripping in both classic and experimental pop sonics with a story that everyone can relate to. “Petty” joins previously released singles “Falling In Like” and debut “BLOCKED.” Get to know the young artist by checking out his Too Good Ten below:

1. What is it about music that made you want to pursue a career in it?

Ever since I was five years old belting out Christina Aguilera’s “Ain’t No Other Man” in the backseat, my parents knew that music was definitely in my blood. Besides my six-month-stint of wanting to be an astronomer at age eight, I’ve always wanted to be a musician. My parents actually met while doing a show at their community theatre and my older brothers both teach music full time, so if I wanted to be a doctor I think my family might look at me sideways.

2. Growing up you were exposed to a wide variety of music such as Classic Rock, Jazz and R&B. How did you end up discovering pop and gravitating to that sound?

Music was always playing in the house growing up, so I was hearing everything from my angsty teen brothers’ mixes to my mom’s compilation CD’s she burned from her iTunes library. While listening to all of these eclectic sounds, pop music always broke through and really spoke to me; serving as an escape to anything I was going through. A musical utopia where polished vocals, ear candy, and slick production were all able to coexist in a nice little 3 minute package.

3. Congrats on the release of “PETTY.” What’s the story behind it? Is it based off a true story?

This record is the culmination of a lot of built up feelings, [laughs]. I think everyone can relate to a toxic ex, friend or even a family member who has just gone so low that you just can’t take the high road anymore. I brought the track to my co-writers Jayelle Gerber, Carlee Chappell, and Francis Karel and the rest is history!

4. Do you consider yourself to be “PETTY?” What’s the pettiest thing you’ve been petty about?

I always try to be a level-headed person, but sometimes you’re pushed so far to the edge that you gotta stoop to their level. Not proud to admit this one, but literally just yesterday I was driving and making sure I was clear to turn right on red and the guy behind me honked...so I simply sat at the red light for another thirty seconds until it turned green. He was not very happy.

5. You also write and produce for various other artists - how is that process different then when you’re working on your own music?

Writing and producing for other artists is such a blast. You’re able to take the music in places you might not be comfortable going in yourself - whether that be lyrically, or sonically. I recently collaborated with Sony Japan’s a cappella group The Gospellers on their new single, “Loving Out Loud.” Creating an entire song with vocals was an interesting challenge that turned out to be super awesome!

6. On your socials you mentioned that you’d love to collaborate with RAYE. What is it about her that makes you want to collaborate with her? If you had to decide right now what would be the name of the song you guys would release together?

RAYE is so insanely talented. Her record “Please Don’t Touch” is pop gold! We both fall into the niche of broken-hearted pop songwriters, so I think we’d make the most heart wrenching record but simultaneously the most danceable one, [laughs]. Let’s call it “Last Goodbye.” Feels dramatic enough, eh?

7. You just released your debut single “BLOCKED” back in December. What was it like to release a debut single? What’s the biggest learning you got from that initial release?

Finally making my debut was so freeing. As an artist you always hear people in the industry telling you “You have a lifetime to make your debut, and six months to make your second album”. So I wanted to make sure I didn’t rush myself. I took time to find my sound and to bring my music to a quality I felt confident in. “BLOCKED” taught me a lot and with each release I am trying to make better music and find my unique sound. I feel like “PETTY” is the true representation of that.

8. Your social bios describe you as a wannabe comedian. If for some reason music didn’t work out would you look to pursue a career in comedy? If so, would it be as an actor, stand-up comedian, social media comedian or all of the above?

I happen to think that I am hilarious. I would love to do have some TV/Movie cameos or do a little three-month-run on Broadway? However, the key word in my bio is definitely wannabe.

9. If you could only listen to (5) artists/bands for the rest of your life, who would they be?

This answer changes on the daily, (which would really be awkward if this was a real dilemma!) but I would say Janelle Monáe, Demi Lovato, Ariana Grande, Bruno Mars and Lorde.

10. What’s the rest of 2021 look like for Drew Louis?

Plenty of new singles and possibly an EP! Working on building up my repertoire, my fanbase and will hopefully be able to start touring by 2022! I’m really excited to bring these songs to life on tour, and for all of the new material to come.

Stay up-to-date on everything Drew Louis by connecting with him below:

Instagram

Tik Tok

Twitter

YouTube

The Too Good Ten interview series is dedicated to giving you a quick glimpse at some of the freshest voices in music. Ten Questions. One Artist. Too Good. Let’s go.

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lumiereandcogsworth · 4 years ago

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rules: tag people u wanna know better

tagged by @brian-zeller thank you my bro

your name and what you would have named yourself: lydia, and when i was like five i wanted to change it to jessie! true story! i did not like my name as a kid. but i’m glad i’m lydia i think i’ve grown into it.

astrological sign (sun/moon/rising if you know them): sagittarius and i do not know the other stuff

when did you join tumblr and why: january of 2019 because jess said lyd how do you not have a tumblr and i said i have no idea! i ran a successful superwholock instagram and pinterest for several years and just never made the jump i could not tell you why but i’m glad to be here now!

top five fandoms: beauty and the beast consumes most of my mind but... watcher entertainment, schitt’s creek, coco, and poldark

top five films: beauty and the beast 2017, forrest gump, coco, big fish, back to the future, pride & prejudice yes i know that’s six too bad

go-to song when you wanna Feel something: multipled by needtobreathe, even if by mercyme, annie’s song by john denver, fireworks by first aid kit, alive in you by jesus culture, idk, really depends on the mood.

what’s your religion or faith if you have one: christian! lutheran, specifically. but yeah

a song that makes you feel seen: eh i don’t relate to songs like that. annie’s song by john denver and multipled by needtobreathe hit me the most.

if you could have any career: a successful author or screenwriter or director or something

do you have a type? dev patel. lmao but idk, nice smile, nice eyes, nice hair?? respectful?? FUNNY????

what does your heart/soul yearn for? a soulmate and a love to last years

if you had to describe yourself in five words to someone who doesn’t know you: i’m kind and also sarcastic <3

favorite subjects in school: in high school i liked my electives most. creative writing, ceramics, painting, nutrition and wellness, life skills. i promise it was a normal shitty american public high school i just didn’t care much for the regular classes. although i did like a lot of my senior year classes, english, environmental science, government/economics— but i think that was cuz i was friends with everyone and we all had senioritis and were fuckin around the whole time lmao. anyway. i’m a comparative ethnic studies major now!

where does your soul feel most at home? surrounded by my family (both actual family and my close good friends <3)

top 5 fictional characters: adam, belle, morwenna, rafael barba, ben wyatt

top 3 moments in a show that made you ugly cry: bro literally every finale of any show i’ve finished??? especially schitt’s creek, friends, the office, poldark... finales get me every time. only specific scene i can think of right now was in poldark when dwight and caroline’s daughter died and dwight just went to ross and burst into tears and hugged ross sobbing. did some real ugly crying there.

the earth, the sun, the moon, or the stars: the stars!!!!!!!!!!

favorite kind of weather: sunny enough that i don’t have to wear a jacket but i’m not going to catch on fire standing still.

top 3 characters you kin with: uhh what did we say. ben wyatt, nick miller, and cogsworth. incredible combination.

favorite medium of art: to admire? i don’t know, paintings, maybe. movies? music? dance? it’s all good and i’m always amazed by people’s abilities and talents!!! to perform for myself, however? writing

introvert/extrovert/ambivert? what is the last one?? is that like something in the middle? root word: ambivalent? maybe i’m that. i usually say introvert, though.

a favorite literary quote: “music saved something inside them that might otherwise have been lost. imagination, power, a glowing spark in their chests that always reminded them: “don’t let the bastards tell you what to be, go your own way, dance badly and sing loudly and become the best!”” from Fredrik Backman’s Us Against You

some of your favorite books: well! anything Fredrik Backman has written. he’s my favorite author. particularly though: beartown and its sequel, mentioned above. I also like the first fifteen lives of harry august, the goldfinch, sam, and uhh... to kill a mockingbird.

if you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be? i’ve no idea! i’ve been so few places!! i’ll go anywhere!!

if you could live in any time in history when would it be? dream aesthetic, i’m an 18th century noble’s daughter. though i wouldn’t really want to be a woman at any point except present day. but also gotta love that 1970s aesthetic babey!!

if you could play any instrument masterfully it would be: guitar or drums or both

if you have one, what mythological god or goddess do you feel a connection to: i do not have one!

and lastly, favorite recent selfie in your camera roll: here have a very random but accurate aesthetic board of me instead!

tagging: @ilikebigassbuttsandicannotlie @enchanted-keys @joenicky @eccleston @hiddenblood @queenamidalas @ceasarslegion + anyone who wants to :-)

#long post #i feel like ive been answering this for so long...#still enjoyed it though #tagged

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lgcyunhyeong · 5 years ago

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hey there!! this is my first time in lgc and i’m super excited to be here! i’ve been eyeing this place for a while and i’m glad i finally mustered up the nerve to join. this is cho yunhyeong, 21, works part time at his local gs25. he’s been a trainee for little over a year and is hoping to eventually debut in a band! he plays the bass and sings a little bit, and he also wants to get into songwriting and composition eventually. he’s generally kind of a weird kid--super spacey, often distracted, your local space nerd--but he’s a good egg in spite of that. compared to some of the other trainees, he’s pretty aimless and chill, but he does genuinely love music and performing, so...!

you can find some more info about him on his about and background pages but they’re kind of messy so i’ll drop some quick facts about yunhyeong under the cut, along with some connection/plot ideas to hopefully kickstart things! if you’d like to plot, please hit like on this post and i’ll hop into your ims! i also have a discord if you prefer to plot there - just ask me for my username ♡

quick facts:

born and brought up in seoul - very local, most comfortable in his neighbourhood, the most exciting vacation he ever took was to busan (and it was #lit). his parents own the best hot pot restaurant in seoul, and yeah he’s biased but that doesn’t mean it’s not true!

has an older brother currently in law school and their relationship is best described as ‘i tolerate you’. they’re complete opposites - his brother is super driven and loud and outgoing while yunhyeong is not so they’ve never really clicked beyond the fact that they are siblings and therefore are obligated to love each other

was the quiet kid growing up, had a very chill and subdued personality. didn’t really speak unless spoken too, didn’t play much with others. most of the time he kept to himself and focused on his hyperfixations - first, it was dinosaurs, and then space! and he’s been stuck with space ever since

his mom put him in music lessons when he was younger in hopes that a relatable hobby might help him make friends?? also that it’d work as a conversation starter but it didn’t because yunhyeong remained as weird and solitary as ever! he did fall in love with music as a result though

in high school he decided to branch out and make friends by starting a band - new age sexy aliens or NASA for short. his recruitment process was like: whoever shows up to join is part of the band! it worked out for the best since he and the band members got really close

they started off playing covers but then branched out into their own original music (yunhyeong helped write some of their lyrics). most of their songs used heavy space imagery and they were really pretty but also low key about aliens

yunhyeong loves aliens

nasa had a pretty dedicated fanbase both online and in their school! did well, were thriving, living their best lives and playing hella gigs, and then their lead singer got scouted by an entertainment company. it was the beginning of the end for them; the rest of the members went their own ways as well and the band officially disbanded in 2018 rip

yunhyeong started to busk on/off since he wasn’t attending university and didn’t really know what the heck else he wanted to do with his life outside of the band, and that’s where he got scouted by legacy! joined the company because like... well... why would he not...

wants to debut in a band if he can... and focus on songwriting and music composition as a secondary career path. he isn’t like... super motivated though? has always had issues with setting goals and being ambitious... he’s more like, eh, i’m just gonna go where life takes me!

personality wise, he’s still a pretty quiet kid unless you get him talking about one of his interests, in which case he will never shut up EVER. he gets distracted easily and will sometimes zone out when you’re talking to him but has a good memory of like, the most random shit you wouldn’t expect him to recall

easygoing as hell, rarely gets riled up over anything. on the flip side, he doesn’t really come across as sincere (even though he almost always is!) in his emotions because people are like... hm... just feels fake. tries to stay as positive as he can and doesn’t dwell on stuff that might upset him. sometimes people think he’s shallow! but he has #deepthoughts. he just doesn’t share them

unmotivated when it comes to most things! has no goals, no ambition, doesn’t care much for academia or being forced to like, conform to things. his mom calls him a free spirit but she’s probably just making excuses for him. it’s more like he’s stuck in some sort of limbo?? scared of growing up but scared of being left behind. it’s complicated

he’s really a sweet guy though. a little odd - he’s not the best at showing affection and sometimes he can be really... strange? offbeat? you never know what the fuck is going on in his head. but he’s a Human Being Just Like You (sadly) and simply trying his best to live every day

connection/plot ideas:

he didn’t really have many friends growing up, but still - childhood friends! maybe you were the exception. maybe you didn’t mind that he was awkward and quiet and a little weird! maybe you tripped and fell on the playground and he gave you a star-patterned purple band aid and you decided you would die for him. who knows!

friends in general who understand him and look @ him with fond exasperation... must be able to tolerate his antics. liking aliens is a bonus. jk, but he’s a sweet guy who loves his friends! please be kind to him

fans of his former band, nasa (or antis?). he was the bassist and a sub vocal and didn’t stand out too much compared to some of the other guys, but he always did the intros and he’ll happily talk about nasa all day! discuss the symbolism of their songs with him

exes? i genuinely cannot think of a single reason why anyone would want to date him but i feel like he’s had at least (1) relationship before... maybe you took a chance and after you started dating you were like, god, i’m running away

crushes, whether one-sided on his part or your part or reciprocated but you don’t know it yet?? he’s holding out for his alien bae but maybe you don’t know that and just think he’s like, this quiet mysterious pretty boy. maybe he thinks you’re cool for a human!

fellow trainees who can play instruments... yunhyeong needs someone to #jam with because playing the bass alone is kind of lonely (and since he’d like to eventually get on the band track, making some connections would be cool)

fellow trainees in general, especially ones in his training group!! he’s not as hungry for debut or as ambitious as some which means he’s a) non-threatening and b) chill to hang with. you could be into that or it could absolutely infuriate you since he doesn’t seem to be taking things seriously! maybe you think he doesn’t deserve to be here

met online on an alien enthusiast forum and you talk almost every single day about various theories and moves and all that kind of stuff but you’ve never met irl! and yunhyeong really wants to meet you in person!

idk bully him

you’re buying a bunch of weird shit from the convenience store where yunhyeong works at like 2 am and he has so many questions and won’t let you pay and leave until you answer them

alternatively, you find him sleeping on the job and you want to wake him up but the moment you touch his arm, he makes this high pitched screeching noise and you fall over and take an entire shelf of candy down with you

you invite yunhyeong out for drinks but he took one sip of soju and he’s a mess... you didn’t sign up to take care of a giant drunken baby but guess what! you will be! if he tries to kiss you, dodge him

you always bum free meals from yunhyeong’s parents’ restaurant because his parents think you’re his best friend. tbh you actually don’t really like him but he doesn’t realize it so he never bothers correcting his parents either!

you didn’t realize yunhyeong was allergic to cats and dogs and you brought your cat/dog near him and oh my god he is having the UGLIEST allergic reaction

yunhyeong can’t swim. you push him into a pool as a joke. chaos ensues

you play various video games together and yunhyeong is really good but he’s more interested in stardew valley than in league of legends and you keep pestering him to play with you dammit i need you on my team

you slipped a love letter under his door for one of his roommates but yunhyeong thought it was for him and now he keeps (kindly) rejecting you whenever you see him and you don’t even know how to react

Oh No We Are Trapped In This Room And The Power Went Out And I Am Scared Of The Dark Please Hold My Hand For Science

yunhyeong loves smoothies and one day you catch him trying to blend a slice of pepperoni pizza into a smoothie because he is, and i quote, “tired of chewing”

IDK ALL THESE IDEAS ARE BAD BUT PLEASE PLOT WITH ME ANYWAY

#lgc:intro #( * out of ufos ! )#( why did i write so much )#( this post is long and ugly )#( ummmm i'm sorry but i'm excited to be here!! )#( pls plot with my weird dumb baby )

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tracingdreams · 5 years ago

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Daiya no Ace: The Dramas - Special “They’re Doing an Interview!” Part III

An explanation… To keep my brain from rusting I started a project to translate the drama tracks that came with the character song CDs and other stuff relating to Daiya no Ace (because I love them and they’re all hilarious). My disclaimer - I am not a native speaker of Japanese, but I will do my best!

Daiya no Ace Season II: Drama CD, Track 01: “They’re Doing An Interview!”(Part III of III)

This is a longer drama from a proper Drama CD, and so I have split it into three parts accordingly. The whole drama also has quite a wide cast <3.

Part III - Featuring Nori, Miyuki, Furuya, Sawamura, Kanemaru, Toujou, Haruichi, Zono, Kuramochi.

The story so far… Miyuki has brought some news to various members of the team that they’re going to be interviewed for a magazine. He’s already freaked out Zono, and has since panicked the first years as well. In order to prevent their nerves from taking over, Kanemaru, Tōjō, Furuya, Eijun and Haruichi have decided to run some practice interviews between them, to get a feel for what it will be like. Kanemaru has thus offered to play interviewer…

Kanemaru: Ok, here goes. (he clears his throat). Sawamura-senshu, I’ll ask you this question. (Translator note: senshu is a player or competitor, it’s often used as a polite suffix for sports people in Japan). About the practice game the other day…

Eijun: Practice game? A recent one?

Kanemaru: Yes. You were the starting pitcher, were you not?

(There is a long pause, then)

Eijun:…I’M REALLY MOST TERRIBLY SORRY!

Kanemaru: eh?

Haruichi: eh? Eijun-kun?

Eijun: The other day, because I was so inexperienced and poor, I allowed a four ball walk for the first batter, and then I got the whole team into a pinch and I’m so terribly terribly sorry for creating such a negative trajectory! Right here I will apologise very VERY sincerely!

Kanemaru: Hang on a minute, Sawamura!

Haruichi: That’s not an interview, that’s an apology at a press conference!

Eijun: Huh? Ah. Sorry. I got carried away…

Tōjō: Well, you know, things like that are quite common lately.

Kanemaru: Just answer more normally, okay? Normally.

Eijun: I see.

(there are footsteps, and Nori joins the group)

Nori: Hey, you guys.

Furuya: Kawakami-senpai?

Eijun: Nori-senpai? What’s up? You look kinda down.

Nori: Well…I just heard from Kuramochi that tomorrow we’re being interviewed for a magazine…

Kanemaru: Ah, you’re being interviewed as well, huh, Nori-senpai?

Nori: Yeah. But I have no idea what to talk about.

Tōjō: You feel that way too, Nori-senpai?

Kanemaru: We were just discussing that subject ourselves.

Nori: Well, you know, it’s the first time, after all. Obviously, I’m kinda nervous.

Haruichi: Yeah, of course.

Nori: When I was in the first year, and I saw Miyuki being interviewed, I have to admit that I was a bit envious. I’d have been lying if I’d said that I didn’t want to experience the anxiety of having an article about me written and printed in a magazine. (Translator’s note – this is complemented by weird, alien-spaceish noises, and I am pretty sure these are Nori’s thoughts, rather than his spoken words, judging by the reaction).

Kanemaru: Nori-senpai sometimes goes off in his own world, doesn’t he.

Tōjō: Yeah, no kidding.

Eijun: It’s all gonna be fine, Nori-senpai!

Nori: Sawamura?

Eijun: If I think about Nori-senpai’s key skills, it’s the way that, whenever you take the mound, you do your own style of pitching and you are always so calm and level-headed!

Nori: Mm…

Eijun: And! The control you have pitching the ball from the side is absolutely unrivalled! If we’re in a pinch, we can always rely on Kawakami – that’s what the club Buchou (Ōta) always says and you have his complete trust! That’s the kind of guy you are! If you can make the most of that in your interview tomorrow, it will be no problem at all!

Nori: I suppose so.

Eijun: And also! If you’re asked about your personal profile, you can share your wide-ranging knowledge of J-Pop music, and your favourite foods are rolled up sushi and karaage! If you go with those things, you can’t fail!

Nori: That really helps!

Kanemaru: Sawamura really has a ton of stuff to say about other people…

Haruichi: He does. It’s really a kind of a talent.

Eijun: So! Shall we do a light interview rehearsal, then?

Nori: Rehearsal?

Eijun: In these cases the best thing is to trample down any stupid fears! I’ll be the interviewer, so Nori-senpai, please answer my questions!

Nori: Okay.

Eijun: (interviewer voice): In which case, first of all…regarding the recent practice game…

Nori: Practice game?

Eijun: Yes. In the ninth innings, when Seidou were level on points with the opposition, you were switched in as relief pitcher, Kawakami…but…

(there is a long pause).

Nori: Mm…I AM SO TERRIBLY SORRY! (Translator’s note – with all these loud apologies, I’m starting to feel like the pitchers all spent the weekend before watching Fruits Basket…)

First years: eh?!

Nori: In spite of the fact the team had got the points back to level pegging, with my weak pitching I brought the team into a pinch situation, and I broke the rhythm of the fight back! In that regard I wish to apologise very, VERY sincerely!

Kanemaru: Ah, this guy too…?

(The scene shifts to the next day. Everyone is together now. Well. With one exception).

Eijun’s voice as narration: And so, the next day!

Kuramochi: Hyahaa! Huh? Hey, come on you lot, hurry up! The reporters are already here!

Kanemaru: H…Hang on a minute! Am I okay, dressed like this? (he is in dirty uniform).

Tōjō: We’ve just come from practice, and we haven’t even washed our faces.

Miyuki: It’s fine, so hurry up and come! It’s fine to be wearing uniform, and we’ve just finished practice, so it’s only natural that they’ll be a bit dirty.

Nori: But there’s going to be a photo, right?

Eijun Hey, Furuya? When did you manage to change your uniform?

Furuya: I thought that it would be better without mud on it.

Eijun: That’s not fair! Miyuki-senpai! Can I go get changed as well please?

Miyuki: It’s too late! Come like that!

Eijun: BUT!

Haruichi: Is this everyone? Huh? Where’s Zono-senpai?

Kuramochi: Huh? Now you mention it, he’s not here.

Miyuki: That idiot, he’s a second year and yet…what is he doing, anyway?

Kanemaru: He’s coming.

Miyuki: (raises his voice): Oi, hurry up, and…(he stops dead. He’s seen Zono). Eeeh?

Zono (appears, breathing heavily like he’s run to join them): Sorry I’m late.

Kuramochi: Zono! What the hell are you wearing?!

Zono: This suit? This suit was handed down to me from my Dad. He told me to use it whenever any special occasion happened, and made me bring it to school with me. In order to be ready for today’s interview, I spent ages last night ironing it! What do you think? It makes an impression, right?

Kuramochi: An impression…well…

Miyuki: You know, no matter how you look at it, that’s not how a high school student dresses.

Zono: Really?

Miyuki: Zono, seriously, it’s an old dude’s suit, for heaven’s sake. It’s not something a high school student would wear! (Translator’s note: If Miyuki, aka the king of hoodies, is lecturing Zono on his fashion sense, it must look pretty bad…)

Kanemaru: It’s the kind of suit you often see professional players wearing in the off-season, in magazines and stuff, isn’t it?

Tōjō: More importantly, Shinji, why do you know something like that?

Kanemaru: *stiffens*, uh, well, you know, at home, we get magazines and stuff…I thought they were pretty cool, so I looked at them a few times.

Zono: Is it no good then? I thought it suited me…

Miyuki: Whatever, just go hurry up and get changed!

Miyuki’s voice – narration: And after that, the interview was safely completed. A few weeks later, a copy of the magazine in which our article was to be printed, Baseball Kingdom, arrived.

Zono: Hey, hurry up and show us!

Miyuki: Calm down! There’s plenty about you written in here too, Zono. Let’s see…’Maezono Kenta-kun, a young man who has a rough aura that belies his years, occasionally shows us glimpses of a very charming smile.’ It says.

Kuramochi: (hysterical laughter)

Zono: (insulted): Hey! What’s so funny? Isn’t it the fruit of all my practice?

Miyuki: Ah, a lot has been written about the first years as well.

Kanemaru: Wow, cool!

Tōjō: There’s several pages, too!

Haruichi: If Mum and Dad saw this, they’d be really happy, I think.

Furuya: I wonder if you can buy it in Hokkaidou as well.

Kuramochi: You should be able to?

Eijun: And me? What does it say about me?

Miyuki: Let’s see…huh? It’s just a little bit.

Eijun: Huh?!

Miyuki: Let’s see. ‘And also, in relief, a left-handed pitcher with a form that makes it hard to see the oncoming ball [at the plate], a first year who pitches moving balls – we’d also like to highlight the existence of Sawamura Eijun-kun. His bright and positive character, nicknamed ‘Idiot Southpaw’ (Baka-sawan) by the rest of his teammates, is his charm.’ (He’s sniggering as he reads it).

Eijun: (incensed): IDIOT SOUTHPAW??!!

Kanemaru: Huh? Now who was it who leaked that to the reporter? (Translator’s note: I bet it was Tōjō…)

Eijun: SAYING THAT WAS OBVIOUSLY NOT GOOD! AND DON’T CALL ME AN IDIOT!

Miyuki: Why not? IDIOTS are IDIOTS, right?

Kuramochi: Hyahaha! Because you’re BAKAMURA!

Eijun: STOPPP ITTT!

(The End).

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bl4cklabyrinth · 4 years ago

Text

Live Report: MY FIRST STORY TOUR 2019 Semi-Final at Kobe World Memorial Hall

Disclaimer: Take note that all of these reports were translated by ear, so there is no assurance of accuracy. Because of this, please do not retranslate my work. I am no Japanese or English native.

I am only reposting the relevant MCs from my Twitter thread for archive purposes. Please check my tweets to read more about my thoughts on the show.

Photo by Takashi Konuma | Taken from MFS’ official Twitter

Setlist

不可逆リプレイス

Black Rail

ブラック・スワン

花-0714-(Re:arrange)

monologue

虚言NEUROSE

KING & ASHLEY

mine

君のいない夜を越えて

終焉レクイエム (Acoustic ver.)

Love Letter (Acoustic ver.)

LET IT DIE (Acoustic ver.)

Band session

無告

Missing You

Weight of my pride (Pay money To my Pain cover)

MONSTER

絶体絶命

ACCIDENT

モノクロエフェクター

REVIVER

With You

Encore

THE OVER (UVERworld cover)

LET IT DIE

ALONE

Story about Weight Loss

Hiro: Anyway, this has no relation (to the acoustic session) whatsoever, but didn’t I get super thin?

Kid’z: You did! Tell us more! You really did lose weight! Nob too!

Hiro: We declared during Hall Tour that we’d lose weight within one month, but we couldn’t do it. We made a promise though, didn’t we? I did my very best, you know?? I seriously gave it all I got!!

Kid’z: I’ve been avoiding carbs for a long time, and even tried diligently apportioning my meals and stuff like that. But before I knew it, I was already eating curry!

Crowd: *laughs*

Fan: How much weight did you lose?

Hiro: I dropped 6 kg.

Crowd: Ohhh! *claps*

Kid’z: That’s a lot!

Hiro: Amazing, right? On the contrary, I’ve always been fat.

Kid’z: No, seriously.

Hiro: I lost weight so that I can get fat again. I want to get fat so I lose weight. When I’ve lost weight, I’ll gain weight again. It’s a never ending cycle.

Kid’z: Don’t leave it as it is!

Hiro: I get told that all the time. I mean, I’m gonna gain weight before METROCK again anyway.

Kid’z: Isn’t METROCK great though?

Hiro: Can I say this? Why do they hold festivals at such a season?

Kid’z: Because (the weather) is cool? I once thought Doraemon was the one singing.

Hiro: Who you calling 123 cm tall?

Kid’z: Nobita-kun.

Hiro: I’m not the blue geezer.

Kid’z: He isn’t a geezer!

Hiro: He’s a geezer, isn’t he?

Crowd: *laughs*

Hiro: Generally, we release a CD around spring or summer. Then we start tour around autumn, right? From the beginning of fall, Hiroki starts losing weight. Little by little. Then, year end starts rolling in. By the end of the year, tour ends, it becomes production season, and eating Hiroki comes out. Hiroki enters hibernation, just like any other large mammal.

Kid’z: You need to stock up, right?

Hiro: Yep, so I can get through winter. Then it becomes spring again. METROCK is waiting for me, but I don’t want stocked-weight-from-hibernation-at-its-max Hiroki to be exposed there! Why do I keep getting told I got fatter or thinner every time?! Leave me alone!!!

Kid’z: But you did your best, right?

Hiro: ...Yep.

Kid’z: Good job.

Crowd: *claps*

Kid’z: How about Nob? How are you doing?

Nob: I lost 5 kg.

Hiro: You lost weight only because you were sick, right?

Kid’z: Because his tonsils were taken out.

Nob: I haven’t gotten my sense of taste back up until now.

Hiro: Don’t let yourself lose one of your most important senses!

Nob: Some time ago I had pickles and it was the best.

Hiro: What an old man.

Story about Poor Kid’z (figuratively and literally)

Kid’z: This story has no relation to anything we’ve talked about so far, but you (Hiro) started an IG account, right? During Hall Tour. Since then, you did a lot of things to me, like that game with the paper cups and the 10,000 yen you put inside one of them, which I played along with having good intentions in mind. I chose the right cup and you gave me the bill, but you revealed that there was 100,000 yen in the other cups.

Hiro: Yep.

Kid’z: ...I tried that with a friend. I was caught. 100,000 yen.

Hiro: Eh?? They made a winning move, huh.

Kid’z: I was like, “Oh no, what should I do?? Should I take it back?” I wanted to be able to fool someone, to get a taste of how it feels! So I started turning the cups around thinking I could do it like you did. When it was time for them to pick, my friend chose a different cup, and in my head I was all, “No no no, not that!!!” and eventually they got it...

Hiro: That person probably saw my IG post and thought you were an idiot.

Thoughts on Marriage

After Love Letter, Hiro and Kid'z talked about being excited yet nervous to play the next song, since it's been a while since they last played it.

Kid’z: Speaking of which, the person beside me seems to be nervous!!

Nob: *rubbing his palms on his pants*

Kid’z: Can I do a hand check? *touches Nob's palm* It's all sticky!

Hiro: Eh? You're scared of making a miss again? Like in Yokoari? Higedan. Ah! Speaking of which, Satoshi-kun got married! Congratulations!

H&K: *congratulate Nob*

Hiro: Eh? Official?

Kid’z: This is Unofficial.

Hiro: Ah, sorry. Unofficial. He got married, huh... There's been a crazy marriage rush recently...

Kid’z: Yeah, it's been all over LINE NEWS lately.

Hiro: Right. back number, Higedan, Maple Chogokin.

Kid’z: You're mean for putting Maple Chogokin as last!

Hiro: No no no. *laughs* The marriage rush is insane, right... Right... Insane right...

Fan: Do you want to get married?

Hiro: ...I don't wanna get married.

Crowd: Eh???

Hiro: Do you? Someday, I assume. As for me, I don't wanna get married at all.

Kid’z: *in a teasing tone* Is it because you don't have a partner?

Hiro: *taunting tone* Ha? Ha? Ha? What the hell are you saying, you.

Kid’z: Ah, sorry we had a little quarrel.

Hiro: Let's get a divorce first!

Kid’z: What the hell is this breakup!

Poor Nob

Photo by Takashi Konuma | Taken from Hiro’s IG post

Hiro: Anyway, are we good? You (Nob) still seem nervous. How are his fingers?

Kid’z: They're tender.

Hiro: If I had to play it in a room like this, I'd be pissed.

Nob: *strums a tune*

Kid’z: It's that song!! It's definitely that song, right? Can you do it, Nob bear? Are you alright? You practiced last night without sleeping.

Kid’z: Give him your support.

Crowd: Cute!! You can do it!!!

Kid’z: The pressure on you is rising, huh.

Hiro: *in an old man voice* You can do it! You can do it! You can do it!

Kid’z: Eh? What was that voice? Father?

Hiro: *taunting tone* Ha? What the hell are you saying. Who you calling father, come home and I'll kill you.

Kid’z: Ah, sorry. Father, I apologize.

Hiro: to Nob You okay? Dududadududa~ (T/N: the intro of LET IT DIE) The last song for the acoustic session. Please listen, LET IT DIE.

Then, Hiro crouched down from his seat and kneeled, looked at Nob closely, and so did Kid’z. Nob stared back, aced the dududadududa intro and everybody clapped for him! However, Nob made a mistake towards the very end, playing the last string of notes twice. When they were walking back to the main stage, Hiro put his arm around Nob and teased in a mocking tone, "Hey, in LET IT DIE, in LET IT DIE, hey, during the acoustic set, hey, I was satisfied with the beginning, but in the middle of the song, hey, you made a mistake, right? Even if you were doing so well." When they got back to the main stage, Nob bowed down in apology.

Weight of my pride MC

Hiro: Your voice has been heard! There were a lot of requests for PTP, and in my heart, PTP is my eternal hero. It shouldn't be just us; so that he can also hear your voices, shout as loud as you can Kobe!!! Next song is called Weight of my pride!

Check out their version of the performance at Saitama Super Arena here:

youtube

モノクロエフェクター MC

Hiro: How are we doing Kobe? I thought everyone in Kobe could handle it, you know? Aren't y'all drinking too much milk tea? Your nipples are gonna become tapioca if you drink too much milk tea, you know? Well, if you're sure you're not drinking too much then you should be able to handle it, so let's all dance together!!

Reviver MC

Hiro: Thank you so much for today! It's been a great day, I'm really grateful. I've always been alone. I've lost so many people I didn't want to lose, and I've let go of things I didn't want to part with many times. I might not be able to change the world with music, but because of music, I met the members, I met all of you, and it made me think that my life was pretty impressive. I want to believe it was my destiny to meet all of you here tonight, so let's keep walking together Kobe!!!

With You MC

Hiro: Thank you so much for today, Kobe!!! After this, the tour will be ending soon. Thinking about it makes me sad, but knowing that you will all be supporting us next year, and the year after that, and the year after that, and even after 10 years makes me feel very grateful. But there's one thing I want to say before today ends: Kobe, I love you!!!

THE OVER MC

Hiro: How was it? MFS' UVERworld. Did I become Hiroki∞? This song was really difficult. The way the lyrics jump, especially during the part before the last chorus.

Kid’z: I didn't learn that note.

Hiro: *emphasizes the difficult enunciation of a line from the song* Unbelievable, I had a hard time remembering it.

Kid’z: The instruments were tough, too. Even Nob was complaining, there were notes he had never seen before.

Hiro: I couldn't match the timing of the lyrics either. I had to enter at an exact time, 3 characters in one second!! If MFS were to do it, we'd go with a lower key.

Kid’z: You say MFS but it's your key, right? Your voice is hella loud you know.

Hiro: It's because if I'm alone, then it's not MFS.

Kid’z: Nah, we were able to match the key, but only you can sing it that high, right? (T/N: They seemed to have raised the key by 2 octaves)

Hiro: You guys thought the cover song was only Weight of my pride, didn't you? You're wrong! We did UVERworld but we received many other requests. There were a lot of PTP songs in the tags. Who else was it... Sheena Ringo, Oral, and King Gnu too.

Kid’z: Weirdly enough, B'z was highly requested too.

Hiro: It'd be weird if I sang their songs.

Crowd: Sing! Sing! Sing!

Hiro: 萎えぇぇ！萎えぇぇ！萎えぇぇぇぇー (T/N: Nae is Japanese slang that roughly translates to “no” or “ugh” in this context) Wait a minute. Change the song.

Kid’z: *offended tone* Huh?

Hiro: Well then, sing a line that starts with A!

Hiro: You're an Ultra Soul Idiot. Do you know any other song apart from Ultra Soul?

Kid’z: Of course I do! Don't you? All of you? I love them more than anyone else, I'm even in the fanclub! こいよ！！

Kid’z: *sings a B'z line that starts with A*

Hiro: Gi!

Kid’z: Gi? *sings a line that starts with Gi* I told you, I can do anything.

Teru: Yu!

Kid’z: Yu? YUME JANAI ARE MO KORE MO SONO TE DE DOA MO AKEMASHOU, SHUKUFUKU GA HOSHII NARA KANASHIMI O SHIRI HITORI DE NAKIMASHOU, SOSHITE KAGAYAKU ULTRA SOUL!

Crowd: HEY!!!

Hiro: Oi, Teruki!! Why did you say "yu"?! You should've let him build up first before making him sing "yu"!! It was too early to make him sing that as the third song!

Kid’z: It felt really good!!

Hiro: Why did you say "yu" so quickly?!

Teru: I just made a mistake.

Hiro: Don't be an airhead!!

Kid’z: I'm really grateful!

Nob’s Redemption Arc

After their UVERworld cover, Hiro asked the audience what they should do next. The crowd started screaming different songs, to which Hiro said "I'm seriously fine with anything." Nob suddenly played the first three notes of LET IT DIE, to which Hiro said, "Ah, from earlier?" Kid'z said, "He made a mistake a while ago, so let's give him another chance." Then Nob started practicing. The crowd screamed, "You can do it!!!" then Nob walked towards the center stage and did a moonwalk. Hiro was all, "You can't do it, you're not Michael Jackson!" then sang a MJ line and howled his signature "Woo!"

Final MC

Hiro: Today was truly an amazing day, thank you all so much. We had such an intense gathering here at Kobe World Memorial Hall. The first Coming Kobe was also held here. We have so, so, so many memories here in this place. Right now, we're still on our way to reaching our dream. From hereon, we don't know if we could make such a big dream come true. We still have a long way there, but we're doing our best every year, making music for everyone and visiting various places as well. Next year, and the year after that, and even after 10 years, it would be nice if we could all make amazing memories together. Thank you so much! We're definitely coming back, Kobe!!

Photo by Takashi Konuma | Taken from Hiro’s IG post

#my first story #マイファス #live #2019 #still sad we didn't get a DVD of the Kobe show #liked it better than Saitama #we could've gotten the MCs and the encore at the very least #sighs #ah well

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beeblackburn · 4 years ago

Text

Pretender Reads A Little Hatred, Part I, Chapter Ten

I won’t break this streak of reading, but procrastination’s got different ideas at times. Goes without saying spoilers ahead for the entirety of The First Law works beyond the keep reading. Read at your own risk.

Chapter Title: Break What They Love Point-of-View: Rikke

Rikke wriggled her shoulders further back among the knotted roots, up to her neck in the icy river and her hair full of dirt, listening to the warriors of her enemy trudge past on the path above. By the sound of it, there were a lot of the bastards. She wondered, yet again, what would happen if they caught her. When they caught her. She tried to make her breath come slow, come even, come quiet.

What with the grinding fear for herself, and the chafing worry for everyone she knew, and the niggling pain of a hundred little knocks and scratches, and the gnawing hunger and gripping cold, it all added up to quite the shittest afternoon she’d ever had, and that with some recent savage competition.

I partly wondered, from a narrative standpoint, why we had so much more Rikke chapters than anyone else in the first ten chapters, four compared to everyone else’s (besides Leo’s two) one chapter. From a character standpoint, they’re slowly acclimatizing Rikke to being more of a survivor, hardening her mind to the turmoils of losing her home and having to run, but I did wonder why her second and third chapters couldn’t have just been tightened into a larger single chapter. I liked them, to be clear, I just wondered the intent.

Now, it clicks better: it’s to get the reader to empathize with the passing grind of miserable days endured post-Uffrith’s burning. A continuity of shittiness and hunger and numbing chill, multiple chapters get across that better than shortening the amount of them. There’s the plot and character details to consider, of course, but in terms of choosing more than less chapters? I’d say it’s to show to the reader, on-page, how much crappy circumstances Rikke’s had to endure for her to have savage competition against this being the worst day.

And, boy, is Rikke scared, given the switch from “if” to “when” of catching her. There’s still a bit of softness and cold fear stuck in her, from a lifetime of being coddled. Isern might have talked about making her iron of a sword, but swords aren’t forged in a day or two. They take time, and Abercrombie’s quite good at making character development a messy path, full of pauses and set-backs.

She felt a fingertip under her jaw, pushing her mouth closed, and realised her teeth had started chattering. Isern was pressed against the bank beside her, river to her sharp chin and hair plastered to her frowning face, still as the earth, patient as the trees, hard as the stones. Her eyes rolled up from Rikke’s to the root-riddled overhang above, and she quietly slipped one finger from the water and over her scarred lips for quiet.

What I love about Abercrombie? That tightness of voice. Of course Rikke didn’t realize her teeth chattering, because we subconsciously can’t help or don’t acknowledge such actions when cold or scared. We’re unreliable bastards that way, and that’s why we need others to let us know the actions we won’t register in our consciousness.

“Shit,” came a voice, so loud it seemed in Rikke’s ear, and she startled, might’ve splashed from the bank on an instinct if Isern’s hand hadn’t clamped tight about her numb arm under the water.

And it seems Isern understands that a sword isn’t forged in a day too. I low-key wonder how much, realistically, that splash would’ve tipped off whoever was around, but, at the same time... the Dogman’s screwed up with stealth before.

And it just takes a moment’s bad luck. Just one.

“Shit… and…” A man’s voice, getting on in years but soft and slow, like he was in no hurry. “There we go.” A satisfied grunt, and a stream of faintly steaming piss came spattering into the water not a stride from Rikke’s face. Sad thing was, she was tempted to stick her head under it just for the warmth.

Bwuhahaha, that’s disgusting, but at the same time, after days of hunger and freezing? Yeah, I can see how dignity takes a backseat to just easing long-setting discomfort for a moment. People can surrender many things, just for expediency. Pride, morals, humanity... just look at the first trilogy for examples.

Also... Clover? That “he was in no hurry” makes me think him, especially considering Stour’s patient as bulls contemporaries. Which... huh! The second time point-of-view characters crossed over in the same chapter, after Savine and Orso in A Little Public Hanging. Curious to see how he handles finding Rikke...

“There’s all kinds of pleasures in life,” came the voice, “but I’ve come to think there’s little better than a piss when you really need one.”

“Huh.” A woman’s voice this time, picking each word careful as a smith picks the nails for a rich man’s horseshoes. “Not sure whether I’ve more respect for you or less following that little revelation.”

“It’s getting to the point…” The stream stopped, then started up again. “Where I sometimes hold on to it… so when I do go…” A few more little squirts. “It feels better than ever. How goes the noble clash of arms?”

Okay, yeah, definitely Clover and Wonderful, they’re the only ones with that kind of dynamic so far.

Also, not to be too crude... but relatable, Clover, you disgusting bastard. Hey, better than worshiping the pleasure of burning houses, eh, Wonderful?

“Union are pulling back as fast as they can. Some skirmishes but there’s no real fight in ’em. No sign o’ the Dogman’s boys. Running, I reckon.”

“Suits me well enough,” said the man. “Any luck, they’ll run all the way back to Angland and we can all have a lie down.”

Rikke glanced over at Isern. She’d been right. She always was bloody right, specially when it came to disheartening predictions.

Not surprising, but, Clover, you do realize Stour wants Angland too? If anything, it’s less a lie down you’ll get, and more besieging a capital with high walls and plenty of angry Union and Dogman’s men behind them. And, given the North doesn’t have a navy, Angland can probably hole up quite a while, given their port.

Unless you mean the siege itself would be the lie down, which, ya shit.

That morning they’d come upon a clearing full of corpses. A dozen or more. Men from both sides, all on the same side now. They say the Great Leveller settles all differences. Rikke had stared at those bodies, her wrist against her mouth, her breath crawling. Then she’d seen Isern, squatting over the dead like a corpse-eater from the songs, plucking at torn clothes, fiddling with buckles.

“What are you doing?”

“Looking for anything we can eat.”

And Rikke had set to searching herself. Trying not to look at their faces as she rooted through pockets with numb fingers. Isern had been right about that, too. Your fear, your guilt, your disgust, they all vanish once you get hungry enough. The thing that really upset her as they crept away from the dead was that they hadn’t found anything.

From just wanting a bit more food way back in Guilt Is a Luxury than her companion to now stealing from the dead, Rikke’s practically taking in the lesson of self-interest being reliable to one’s motives than higher-minded thoughts. Because, ultimately, the dead won’t complain here. It’s the living who have a host of worries, stomachs aching with hunger, who don’t want to join the dead.

“Chief!” someone roared up on the road. “Nightfall! The king-in-waiting!” And there was an approving clatter of weapons on shields.

Rikke stiffened under the water. Stiffened far as she could given she was near enough a block of ice already, and Isern pressed against her and whispered, hardly more’n a breath, “Shhhhhhhh…”

Oh, shit. (swallows)

“By the dead,” she heard the woman mutter above, and then, with forced good cheer, “Chief! How’s the day?”

“Bloodless so far, but it’s still early.” The voice of Stour Nightfall himself, then. A whining sort of voice for a famous warrior. Sounded like a boy on the edge of a tantrum. “They’re thin sauce, these Southerners, always trickling away. The Bloody-Nine had Rudd Threetrees to fight, and Black Dow, and Harding Grim and all the rest. How’s a man meant to win a great name without great enemies to weigh it against?”

A brief pause. “It’s a tester, all right,” said the woman.

The difference between Clover and Rikke’s look on Stour? Rikke’s more fully geared to think worse of Stour, given Uffrith’s burning, taking into account his “whining” sort of voice. Clover... well, he was certainly primed to think worse of Stour, given Calder and Wonderful’s words, but that’s cushioned a bit by the knowledge that Stour’s just the recent out of a shitty cycle of warrior cocks.

Rikke doesn’t have that knowledge and that wouldn’t cushion away Uffrith’s fate. Not that it should, because, geez, Stour does sound the whiny type, wanting a big name to puff himself up, just like the Bloody-Nine did. All this does is strengthen my Stour = cut-price Bloody-Nine sentiment. Wonderful’s response is perfect sarcasm in that regard. I just imagine both she and Clover are rolling their eyes in their minds at Stour right now.

I know I am.

Also, it’s nice that Finree’s plans are working accordingly!

“I’ve a task for you, Wonderful. There’s a girl out in these woods.” Rikke had a bad feeling in her stomach. Worse than the hunger, and she shrank against the bank like she could become one with the dirt. “I want her.”

A snorting chuckle from the enthusiastic pisser. “Well, who wouldn’t want a girl out in the woods?” There was a silence, like the jest had miscarried. Certainly Rikke wasn’t fucking laughing. “How do we tell this girl from another?”

“They say she’s got a twitchy way. She’ll have a gold ring through her nose, maybe a cross painted over her eye.”

Rikke touched the tip of her tongue to the ring through her nose and whispered, “Fuck.”

“She might have some witch of a hillwoman with her. That you can kill. But the girl we need alive.”

“Must be important,” said the woman called Wonderful.

Nightfall gave a little hooting giggle. “Well, there’s the thing. She’s the Dogman’s daughter.”

Hm? They weren’t already looking for Rikke? Or, is it... they know the approximate location of where she is now? Because, shit, there’s the active tension we’ve been missing in the past Rikke chapters. Whereas they were about Rikke getting into the survivalist mindset, this is the starting point of where she concretely realizes it’s survive or die. She has the voice of the enemy now.

“What happens if we catch her?”

An unhappy grunt. “Well, if my father gets her, I daresay he’ll ransom her back, dangle her as bait, use her to get his way when it comes to talking peace.” And Nightfall spat out the word like it tasted bad. “You know my father. Plans within plans.”

“Always been clever, Black Calder,” came the man’s voice.

Very Bethod with Rattleneck’s son, Calder. Cunning to use as leverage against the Dogman and the Union to getting back Uffrith and Angland. I doubt Rikke, by herself, has the traction to get back Angland, of course, but Uffrith... Dogman’s generally had a more decent heart than most, and I’m sure he’d consider it, at least.

Too bad that Stour—

“I see things different. How I see it, the way you break your enemy is you break what they love. Way I hear it, those old fools on the other side love that twitching bitch. Sort of a little mascot for ’em.” Rikke heard the smile in his voice. “So if I get hold of her, I’ll strip her, and whip her, and pull her teeth out, and maybe get some Thralls to fuck her, out between the lines where everyone can hear her squealing.” Bit of a silence, and Rikke heard her own breath coming ragged, and Isern’s hand tightening around her arm. “Or maybe I’d get my horse to fuck her. Or my dogs. Or… like, a pig, maybe?”

WHAT.

The older man sounded more than a touch disgusted. “How the hell would you do that?”

“There’s naught you can’t do if you’ve the imagination and the patience. Then I’ll bind her up in the trees with brambles where everyone can see, and cut the bloody cross in her, and put a bucket underneath to catch her guts, and send ’em to the other side.”

THE.

“What, her guts?”

“Aye, in a pretty box. Hardwood, nicely carved. With flowers, maybe. Or no! Herbs. So those old fools won’t smell what they’re getting till they open it.” And he gave a satisfied grunt, like he was talking about a nice fish he’d catch, or a nice meal he’d eat, or a nice sit on the porch he couldn’t wait to have at sunset. “Imagine the looks on their faces.” And he chuckled like her guts in a box would be quite the height of drollery.

“Fuck,” breathed Rikke.

FUCK.

HOLY SHIT, STOUR. What the ACTUAL FUCK?

1. My jaw legit dropped at this and I had to walk away from the text for a solid fifteen minutes. That’s how bad my immediate reaction was. 2. After that walk and thinking about it a little more... yeah, wow, this is going to put more fear into Rikke... or hatred. As Machiavelli say, it is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot have both, but avoid hatred at all costs, and this might tip Rikke into hatred. So. Congratulations, Stour, you might have just made a hard enemy without realizing it. 3. ... Stour Nightfall is actually kind of really... comically absurd, reading back? Like, really over-the-top pointless cruelty in a way that Abercrombie intended. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a clear-cut asshole and, regardless of sincerity, Rikke should have plenty of reason to fear him, but the “Or… like, a pig, maybe.” line makes me think he’s trying to escalate his plans in an attempt to be all imposing and full of blackness to Clover of all people. 4. If we continue the Bethod/Logen/Rattleneck and his son allusion, then there’s nothing of the cold, chilling nature of Made a Monster’s ending here. It’s just a child trying to play-act the Bloody-Nine and thinking that makes him a badass. Look, I know some people might take Stour full-on serious here and I get that, considering the sexual threats, but t’s just... sorry, really, I can’t entirely take it seriously. Especially when Abercrombie’s proven in the first trilogy he does not write such over-the-top threats and situations without taking the piss out of them. 5. Good that even Clover was disgusted by this. Should be taken as a given, but it’s good to know Stour disgusts even hardened Named Men. 6. For that matter, what’s Stour’s angle here? This is in private, only him, Wonderful, and Clover, and Wonderful’s likely already been treated to plenty of stories about Stour’s assholery. So, in all honesty, from a character standpoint, this feels like it’s mostly for Clover’s benefit. Stour already treats Clover with derision and like an old turd, so why does the ass-pup feel the need to impress Clover with how much of a BIG VIOLENT COCK WARRIOR he is? Maybe it is the lack of reverence from Clover that makes Stour push harder and escalate to get a positive reaction? Or maybe Stour just wants to imprint some fear into Clover, considering he’s the newest Named Man in his company? 7. Thinking through all of this, why are you such a disgusting dumbass, Stour.

“But that’s for later.” And Nightfall gave a disappointed sigh. “Can’t cook what you haven’t caught, can you? My father’s offering a big gild for her, that’s sure. Whoever brings her in’ll be a wealthy man.”

The woman called Wonderful sounded like she was hardly enjoying this any more than Rikke was. “Right y’are, Chief. We’ll be looking.”

Good thing about Rikke’s perspective? Even she has the good nature to know Stour’s “allies” don’t much enjoy the ass-pup like her. Though, that won’t really stop Wonderful from capturing her and giving her to Stour, will it.

Rikke heard soft footfalls moving away. Perhaps she should’ve been frozen with fear. The dead knew she’d a right to be. But what she felt instead was a boiling fury. A fury that warmed her through despite the icy water frothing to her chin. A fury that tempted her to slip from the stream with her knife between her teeth and cut the bloody cross in Stour Nightfall right then and there.

Rikke’s father had always told her vengeance was a waste of effort. That letting it go was the strong thing, the wise thing, the right thing. That blood only led to more blood. But his lessons seemed far away now, meant for a warmer place. She clenched her jaw, and narrowed her eyes, and swore to herself that if she lived out the week, she’d make it her business to see Stour Nightfall fucked by a pig.

Oh, oh.

You know, I’ve been low-key wondering which first trilogy comparison befitted Rikke in terms of being a refinement/evolution of an earlier character archetype and, while the Dogman or Logen were the easiest choices to pick, both of them the Northern perspectives in the first trilogy, I feel like the Logen comparison only holds up in terms of early chapter material similarities of cold-bitten survival and hardships, whereas the Dogman comparison held up decent enough, another Northerner who just wants to do the right thing... until now. Now, it clicks into place what first trilogy archetype Rikke’s refined from.

The first woman, burning with vengeance.

“What do you want, Ferro Maljinn?”

“What?”

“Why did you do that?” Yulwei pointed down at the dead man. “What do you want?”

“Vengeance.” She spat out the word.

—The Blade Itself, What Freedom Looks Like

Rikke’s the most recent of vengeful women in the Circle of the World.

She curled her fingers round the cold grip, strange in her left hand, and slid a few inches of steel from the sheath. It shone bright and eager in the lamplight. Good steel bends, but never breaks. Good steel stays always sharp and ready. Good steel feels no pain, no pity and, above all, no remorse.

She felt herself smile. The first time in months. The first time since Gobba’s wire hissed tight around her neck.

Vengeance, then.

—Best Served Cold, The Bone-Thief

But, if we’re talking in terms of backstory, the hardships, the suffering of diaspora at a young age from losing your home and those you loved?

The old man jerked his head at the woman, watching them suspiciously with her slanted yellow eyes. “She is from a place called Muntaz.”

“I never heard of it.”

“Why would you have?” The old man shrugged his bony shoulders. “A small country, by the sea, far to the east of Shaffa, beyond the mountains. The Gurkish conquered it years ago, and its people were scattered or made slaves. Apparently she has been in a foul mood ever since.” The woman scowled over at them, keeping one eye on the soldiers.

—The Blade Itself, Nobody’s Dog

Rikke, I posit, is Abercrombie’s second chance at writing Ferro, given far more dimensionality and given a greater sense of personhood pre-vengeance. Ferro was too tight-lipped about her losses and locked in her vengeful mindset to be that much more than a vessel of vengeance against Uthman-ul-Dosht and Khalul. She was also surprisingly passive in terms of the narrative, back then, being jerked around by Bayaz’s offer of vengeance against the Gurkish Empire and less an independent player on the board until after the first trilogy.

Rikke’s still young enough, just walking the first steps, to not be devoted to vengeance, to choose and seek out better paths, because as Ferro herself points out:

When the light of the fires and the sound of the talking had faded into the distance she stopped and dropped down on the hard ground. A cold wind blew up across the barren plain. It blew stinging dust in her face, but she hardly noticed. The hate and the fury were gone, for the time being, but they had left a hole, and she had nothing else to fill it with. She felt empty and cold and sick and alone. She hugged herself, rocking slowly back and forth, and closed her eyes. But the darkness held no comfort.

—The Blade Itself, What Freedom Looks Like

By the dead, I have no complaints about her wanting Stour dead, but... I hope she comes out of that, still human. Still having something inside her by vengeance’s end.

That being said, I 100% hope and expect to get Ferro in this trilogy eventually!!! Just like Ardee and Terez, Ferro’s a female character given the short shrift, comparatively, who I will be fascinated at reading, if Abercrombie gives us.

“I’ll be honest, Wonderful,” came the man’s voice, the one called Clover, speaking soft like he was sharing a secret, “I’m finding that bastard increasingly troubling.”

“Aye, I know.”

“Took it for an act at first, but I’m starting to think he’s everything he pretends to be.”

“Aye, I know.”

“Guts in a box? With herbs?”

“Aye, I know.”

“He’ll be king one o’ these days, will guts-in-a-box over yonder. King o’ the Northmen. Him.”

A long pause, then a weary grunt. “It’s a thing no right-thinking person could look forward to.”

I’m... of two minds here. I’m not sure Stour’s everything he pretends to be, not all his reputation is, but I definitely agree that there’s an vicious and awful person in him, regardless. This isn’t a decent man pretending to be a bad man for fear or reputation’s sake, like the typical trope demands and like Bethod and Calder had to act. This is a bad man pretending to be worse. Stour carving out his own path, out of the stale and well-trodden roads of the ghosts of the first trilogy.

Also, when you put it like that, this strikes me of like how the North reacted to King Logen, way back in Last Argument of Kings. Fear of what was to come out of that station and reality. And it really says something that Clover and Wonderful, two Named People who’ve lived through three Kings of the North, talk of Stour’s upcoming reign as something that strikes as worse than Black Dow or potentially the Bloody-Nine’s reign.

Rikke could only agree. She thought she saw a hint of their reflections, dancing among the black branches in the water.

“You see something down there?”

(Throat tightens) After Stour’s threats? Oh god no.

She stiffened, numb fingers curling tight around the grip of her knife. She saw the jaw muscles clench on the side of Isern’s face, blade of her spear sliding from the water, smeared with pitch so it wouldn’t catch the light.

“What? Fish?”

“Aye. Worth getting my rod, d’you think?”

The sound of Wonderful hawking up, then a glob of phlegm came spinning over from above and plopped into the water. “Nothing in this stream worth catching, I reckon.”

(Breath of relief) Live to survive another day, Rikke! Though, I’ll admit, I wonder what would’ve happened if Clover and Wonderful found out Rikke? Would they let her go, considering they’re not particularly enjoying the graces of Prince Ass-Pup? Or would they have captured her, thinking it not much of a weight on their consciences compared to their own lives? I’m not sure I’d like the answer to that question...

As a chapter, this is one hell of a turning point, important to the plot and characterization. It’s the accumulation of all of Rikke’s chapters in the woods, digging through corpses’ pockets and freezing so hard she feels like ice, hiding from Stour’s men. But, from there, the crux of the chapter of the Stour material, which... as disgusted and grossed-out as I was at first impression, strikes me as dearly overcompensating in hindsight, for some reason. But he makes a turning point in Rikke’s narrative, where she goes from just wanting to survive and be safe from his men, to having the more visceral motive of vengeance against Stour after his words. It’s a worrying turn, to say the least, especially given the Ferro connection, but after the circumstances she’s endured... can’t much blame her. The chapter also sets up a point of discontent between Stour and the rest of the Northmen and how much his over-the-top cruelty could turn off his allies, which, given Rikke’s from the North too and his enemy... could prove interesting.

PART I

Chapter One: Blessings and Curses Chapter Two: Where the Fight’s Hottest Chapter Three: Guilt Is a Luxury Chapter Four: Keeping Score Chapter Five: A Little Public Hanging Chapter Six: The Breakers Chapter Seven: The Answer to Your Tears Chapter Eight: Young Heroes Chapter Nine: The Moment Chapter Ten: Break What They Love

#a little hatred #a little hatred spoilers #the age of madness #the first law #joe abercrombie #rikke #a little hatred part I

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cecilspeaks · 5 years ago

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155 - The Heist, part 3

Leave no stone unturned. Leave no rock unpivoted. Leave no pebble untwirled. Welcome to Night Vale.

My brother-in-law, Steve Carlsberg, is still in jail, wrongly accused of the recent bank heist. But I am happy to have my husband Carlos back home. The Sheriff’s Secret Police had only taken him in for some questions regarding the robbery of the Last Bank of Night Vale. Sheriff Sam had deemed Carlos a person of interest, which I’ve been saying for years, but Sheriff Sam meant it differently.

Carlos said while he was being questioned at the police station, he saw the other bank employees who were there the day of the robbery. Genevieve Daly, the new bank teller, was being asked if she saw anyone other than Steve Carlsberg near the vault that day. Carlos said she was stone faced, unhappy with the interrogation. Susan Willman was there, crying, as the police asked her who else, other than Steve Carlsberg, could have a key. And security guard Jesse McNeil was there looking quite ill, almost seasick, according to Carlos, as the police tried to badger him into implicating Steve Carlsberg.

Carlos has been home for a couple of weeks and in a terrible funk. He said Steve has a nearly impossible case. The police are convinced of Steve’s guilt and all their evidence points directly to him. Carlos hardly has any energy or emotion to work, or even leave the house. I feel awful for Steve too, and we are doing our best to support him and our family.

I tried cheering Carlos up by telling him my favorite science jokes, like two chemists walk into a bar and one tells the bartender, “I’ll have an H2O” and the other says “I’ll have an H20 too,” and the bartender says and sighs.. [fed up] “It’s been a long day guys,” and then the two chemists nod and say, [embarrassed] “Yeah oh god yeah sorry, just a couple of waters thanks.” And then later they make sure to tip very well. But Carlos didn’t even crack as mile, let alone laugh, and I asked him how his doorless fridge experiment was going and he’s welcome to work on it here, in his home laboratory. I don’t even mind if he keeps staining everything green with that weird gel he’s been using. “I ran out of gel, Cecil,” he said, prone on the couch not opening his eyes. “I couldn’t work on that, even if I wanted to. which I don’t.” Hm. I wanna curl up on the couch too, stay home from work. But I know that would be terrible for Carlos. There are many times I’ve felt flat or depressed, and Carlos has been there for me, keeping me company, taking in my sadness and reflecting back not a false smile but attentive eyes, a listening posture that makes me feel heard and understood, and that’s what I want to be for him. Besides, I think Steve can beat these charges. Steve may have been the only one with a key to the vault, but they cannot prove he opened the vault, as he was locked inside his own office during the robbery. And besides, Steve keeps very detailed accounting so they wouldn’t be able to find the stolen money, not even if he had taken it. Steve Carlsberg is… [moved] the nicest man in Night Vale. He’s a good boss, breaking his foot to get free to try to protect his employees. He’s a fine father. A loving husband. And a perfect brother-in-law. It’s just not... it’s not possible. You know, if someone on the inside did this, it was probably Susan. Susan Willman is the least trustworthy person in that bank, if not in this whole town. So if you’re going to…

[loud scary noises] Station Management just slit a memo under my door gently, reminding me about libel laws. The memo is written in fire on a sleep tablet, and there’s a snake curled around it so, uhh.. I’m going to leave my Susan WIllman theory alone. But. Let’s just say that there was an untrustworthy person in that bank, and that her name was Su..anne Wilt..son. Yes, Sue-Anne Wilson, yes and this hypothetical jerk was always complaining at PTA meetings about her own personal problems, rather than focusing on the agenda, let’s just say. And this Sue-Anne Wilson once accused Steve Carlsberg of censoring her, when Steve was just trying to finish the meeting in a timely manner so that the basketball team could se the gym for evening practice. This person might well hold a grudge against Steve Carlsberg and want to not only steal from him, but frame him for the crime.

Or, what if the Sheriff’s Secret Police… [loud scary noises] was doing a really great job, so great that they didn’t have a lot of arrests to make because the town was so safe. And of course, [chuckling nervously] they would never need to frame someone for robbery! So they would look like they were solving one of the major crimes in recent memory. Or maybe it was space slugs. Some distant aliens from across the galaxy somehow found our solar system and spotted our Earth, and then randomly chose Night Vale, and for whatever reason, they really wanted our money, so they went down inside the bank vault while the building was on fire, and without the safe key they entered the locked room because these space slugs can crawl through walls, and then they stole all the money. I don’t know! I feel helpless.[loud scary noises fade out]

Reading the news and getting angrier and angrier, but you know there’s little I can do about terrible things that keep happening. I’m sure you can’t relate. Maybe a community calendar will cheer me up.

This Saturday, the Desert Flower Bowling Alley and Arcade Fun Complex opens its annual Haunted Halloween Hayride. There was complications this year, because Ghost Union Local 31 went on strike for an increase in pensions and maternity leave. Teddy Williams, owner of the Desert Flower, argued that ghosts cannot retire nor get pregnant, but the union countered with vaguely human faces muttering in the shadows while Teddy screamed, and eventually, a deal was truck.

Sunday morning is the pie eating contest at the Night Vale fair. Contestants will be competing for a top prize of a 1991 Buick Le Sabre, autographed by former US presidential hopeful and Illinois governor, Adelai Stevenson.

Tuesday afternoon is a tedious song. Wednesday night is the high school dance team’s statewide semifinals at the rec center. Our own Night Vale High School is competing that night. Their top rival is Red Mesa High School, who will be performing a jazz routine called Tommy Tunes Broadway: an upbeat medley of classic show tunes. Night Vale’s dance team will present (--) [0:09:21] postmodern masterpiece (-): contemplative blend of sculpture opera and dance defined by its explosive physical bursts, chanting, and (contra-) movements born of a 22-member ensemble, who express the human body as a multidimensional art installation. Good luck to all dancers!

And finally, Thursday is sick, so Friday will be covering Thursday’s shift. Eh, except for the part about the haunted hay ride. That did not cheer me up.

I’m getting word that the Secret Police have made a breakthrough in their bank heist investigation. Or maybe they found the real thief and can let Steve Carlsberg go? [clears throat] Sheriff Sam said the lab reports came back, the fingerprints were inconclusive as their top suspect Steve Carlsberg worked at the bank, so his fingerprints were everywhere. But the lab reports did detail a strange goo police found on the vault walls. This goo, a light green gel, was also found on the walls of the cells that the other robbers had escaped from two weeks ago. So maybe my theory about space slugs is correct. No wait. The lab reports showed that this unusual chemical can render certain metals intangible, allowing people to reach through walls without breaking them. [stutters] Police believe whoever used this greenish goo used it to rob the bank’s vault and to free the prisoners inside the abandoned mineshaft outside of town. The Sheriff then said they discovered this exact same chemical on Steve Carlsberg’s property. They discovered it inside the shed behind the house, and that this is the final piece of evidence that links Steve Carlsberg to the robbery of the Last Bank of Night Vale. They believe that, oh no… Um, that Steve did not act alone, that he had an accomplice, a scientific mastermind who created this chemical for him. Who generated a complex concoction that enabled them to walk through walls stealing whatever they wanted. They have a warrant out now for Carlos’ arrest. I’ve gotta call Carlos. I- Oh, it looks like he left a voicemail.

[beep] Carlos: Hey sweetie, it’s um me. So listen, I have um, I so-so I’ve just been arrested. No biggie, no biggie, I’m fine. This is actually good news, because I wanted to talk to the Sheriff anyway about all this, so that-that’s great. And um, I do have some new thoughts about what happened at the bank, and they’re really interesting, so they’re driving me downtown to meet with uh ooh, ouch, those cuffs are a bit tight there, officer… officer (Q. Fortier). Ah, that is a beautiful name. I-i-is that Franchian? If you don’t mind, Officer Fortier, I’m going to just finish my voicemail to my husband. So Cecil. When I get downtown, I’ll explain everything to them, Steve and I clearly did not do this and that’s what I’ll tell them, they’re police! [chuckles] You know, they just wanna know the truth, and uh ooh uh, oh Officer Fortier, I am not done with my call yet. Uh sir, what-what are you doing with my pho- [beep]

Cecil: I… I… Let’s go to the weather.

[Good Luck with That” by Fathom All the Animals https://fathomalltheanimals.com]

Cecil: Listeners, we now go live to Steve Carlsberg’s press conference at City Hall.

Steve: This has been a difficult month for me, and for my family. I thank you all for hearing me out today. I’m glad to know that these criminal charges are behind me, and I think Sheriff Sam and their secret police, as well as their Overt Police, for listening to reason and overturning the charges against me. [sadly] But of course, I’m sad to learn about their most recent arrest. Breaks my heart to know that such a dear friend of so many years, someone who’s been in home many, many times, someone I consider family, could betray me, my bank, my town in this way. I don’t even know how to talk about such a breach of trust by someone so close. [crying] Carlos! Oh Carlos. Thank you Carlos, for your brilliant and thorough evidence that put Jesse McNeil in jail today. Our security guard of nearly 50 years committed a heinous crime, and he nearly sent the two of us to prison for it.

When Carlos arrived in my cell this morning, he was all smile saying he had figured it out. He called the Sheriff over and said, “Check Jesse’s skin for the same chemical they found on the doors.” Carlos had been experimenting on the gel that allowed him to reach his hands into refrigerators without opening the door, and thus lowering the temperature of the food inside. He’d developed this chemical. He’d developed this chemical in his temporary lab in a shed behind our house. The problem with the chemical wasn’t its effectiveness and intangibility. He had been able to make that work. No, the problem with the chemical is that it stained everything it touched a dull green, including skin. Carlos showed me his own hands, which were green from the fingertips to about halfway up his forearms. He said the last few times he had seen Jesse, Jesse looked ill. Not like a flu or cold, more like seasick: queasy, green in the face. Carlos didn’t put it together right away, because we all felt sick about not only the robbery, but the false charges against me.

The police report also showed that none of the cash tills on the teller wall were affected by the fire that broke out during the robbery last month. Which means the fire had to have started on the opposite wall, which is by the front door, Jesse’s usual station. The smoke from the fire and the three robbers waving guns provided a distraction for Jesse to cover himself with Carlos’ intangibility gel, sneak downstairs past my office, where he had locked me in earlier than day, and then unload the cash from the safe and carry it into the alleyway behind the bank where his car was parked. When the fire trucks arrived, Jesse ran deliberately in front of their hoses so that the gel would all be removed from his body before the police began questioning those of us who had been inside during the robbery. But, as Carlos pointed out, the gel stains the skin for a long time, water alone won’t remove it.

Sheriff Sam brought Jesse back in for questioning based on Carlos’ statements, and found Jesse’s skin was the same dull green as Carlos’ hands. But unlike Carlos, the green stain covered Jesse’s whole body, not only his hands, indicating he had used it to walk through walls, rather than merely reach to a door.

Carlos explained that he had Jesse in his lab many times, Jesse and all my employees come to my house regularly for dinners. Like I said, they’re family to me. Jesse had taken an interest in Carlos’ science projects, so Carlos showed Jesse his doorless fridge experiment. Not long after that, Carlos noticed that the rest of his intangibility gel was gone. He thought he had just run out, even though he had made plenty of it. Never occurred to Carlos, until he saw Jesse’s green face a few days ago, that Jesse had stolen it to remove the money from the vault and his criminal colleagues from their jail cell. While I was the only person with the key to the vault, Jesse as a security guard was the only person with master keys for the rest of the building. My office door is never locked, so I don’t carry a key for it. Jesse knew this and locked me into my own office. Then his three collaborators Richard, William, and Emma created a fake robbery of the cash tills to distract from his heist of the vault. Sheriff Sam was impressed with Carlos’ explanation and arrested Jesse McNeil on the spot. Jesse turned to Carlos and Sam and said: [very deep voice] “I guess I’m going to jail now.” Sam said: [Sheriff Sam voice] “Don’t flatter yourself!”

Anyway, I finally get to return home, thanks to my brother-in-law Carlos. Thank you Susan Willman for managing the bank in my absence. Abby, Janice, I’ll be home in a few. Can’t wait to see you both again. Oh, oh, maybe I’ll bake some scones tonight! Carlos showed me a way to do it without letting the butter too warm. Oh-oh yeah!

Cecil: I’m so relieved and so glad they put the right person behind bars. And I have never been so excited to try one of Steve’s scones. That really is neat.

Stay tuned next for someone playing on a saw. No, ahem, (-) that, with a saw. It’s just someone playing around with a saw. Enjoy.

Good night, Night Vale, Good night.

Today’s proverb: Wisdom ages like fine wine. Knowledge ages like Boston lettuce.

#welcome to night vale #wtnv #wtnv transcripts #episode 155 #the heist #the heist part 3

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lorei-writes · 5 years ago

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People I’d Like to Know Better

Aww, I got tagged by @datenoriko . Let’s do this!

Birthday: March 13 ( it’s somewhat awkward sometimes, because I never know what to answer whenever somebody asks me for my age if it’s before my birthday - the most accurate answer would be my actual age, but the more useful one would be to round it up. Either way, I’m almost 20).

Zodiac: Pisces! (And I can’t swim and have been terrified of water since forever).

Last song I listened to: Take This Lonely Heart - Nothing But Thieves

Hobbies:

Okay, stay with me there. Disclaimer: I do not do all of that stuff all at once. I do not know why it is that, but my hobbies have always followed fixated pattern: find something you like and do nothing else in your free time. I do not want to brag here, I’m just really passionate about those things! + I’m babbling way too much.

Math - I absolutely adore math, especially logarithms and trigonometry. There’s nothing more satisfying that finding a solution to a problem, even if it’s “using a cannon to kill a mosquito”, as my tutor says. That being said, I usually studied on my own (the majority of my classmates at high school just oftentimes needed more time than I did. I did have a private tutor - it is a really common thing in my country - but I usually had the general idea of the concept before the class and we’d just solve the tasks I didn’t know how to tackle). Because math is just like that! It makes sense! I feel safe doing math - if I can see enough examples, then I’ll probably be able to come up with a pattern and the solution. However, there’s a single problem with math ^^”” I had a very bad posture and could sit studying well... 6 hours at school + 3-5 at home (+private tutorial depending on the day)?^^””” It wasn’t all math, but it certainly did increase the amount of time I’ve spent like that... A couple of years of that and you know how I injured my spine ^^”” It was really bad, hehe, I could hardly write ^^” The first physician I’ve seen also didn’t diagnose it right, so I had to take a year off to somehow figure it out ^^””

Writing - I LOVE WRITING. I think I’ve started doing it when I was 11? Although it’s probably hardly noticeable, since I had never written stories in English before, haha. I usually write fantasy, because the word building aspect of it is just so enjoyable. Other than that... I am this unfortunate kind of writer that can’t lie ^^” I always have to research everything, otherwise it doesn’t feel right at all! I most probably always am overly optimistic in regards to economic stuff, but yeah, overall I tried to read up. Recently I’ve been EXTRA excited by how different English is when compared to Polish! I hope one day I’ll be able to convey the same raw emotion in both of them. And that I develop muscle memory, so that I don’t make so many typos!

O, and there’s some actual I-have-looked-it-up-stuff in my stories (spoilers): Had it happened in the future, part 2 - I know a person who has lost an eye in a very similar way, Dragon’s Treasure - technically, those are the symptoms of a poisonous hemlock... Poisoning. Gash, it sounds so stupid. Either way, it doesn’t grow in Japan (but it does in China, India, almost the entire Europe), so I put up the “it was exported” hypothesis. Either way, the funny thing in the story is that we still don’t have an antidote for it, so Torakikumaru was literally saved by the fact that he wasn’t hungry after stuffing himself with candy - yes, the konpeito he shared with Nobunaga. The boy just didn’t ingest enough of the plant for it to be lethal. Together? That’s how untreated hypothyroidism looks. I hope to write more stuff including some small details like that ^^” O, yeah, I was also really happy with how the Judgement day turned out! I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’ve referenced the Exodus there ^^” Well, more precisely, Exodus 34:14, per verse. Though I’d say that that what happened before is also kinda important - the golden calf and so on.

Yes, I’ve been on one shots rampage since I’ve started this blog.

SEWING - I’m self taught seamstress! I make mostly backpack and cute bags, but I can sew some simple clothes just as well ^^ Recently I’ve been doing some easy fixes and mending, but I hope to make a flat lined skirt in near future. Now that I finally have my hand back, I want to WORK. I also do embroidery.

Crocheting & Loom Knitting - I’m not the best at either of this, but it’s soo calming. I oftentimes crochet when watching something - I actually can do this and still read the subtitles, so I can watch anime!

Languages - it’s low-key embarrassing, but I can only speak Polish and English ^^” I know some very basic French and Japanese as well, but yeah, I hope to learn more about those. Preferably, I’d like to understand written and spoken Japanese without much trouble. Though I like to just listen how others speak about languages just in general - what are the grammar rules, etc. It’s so fascinating!

Biology - I kinda cheated on biology (well, and chemistry) with math, but I still do love it. I especially like reading about the engineering of human body - how it evolved, what are the flaws in the “design”, how it all works. And for some reason, I like the long words. Just the long words. And since I like to know what they mean, people at school assumed that I was smarter than I was - like, nope, dear, I just read about random stuff and get VERY excited when there’s just a single tiny tineey chance I can infodump somebody.

Drawing - I used to draw portraits before my spine injury ^^” I was kinda decent at it, but yeah, well... Spine. Couldn’t hold the pencil. I’ve lost most of my skill now, but I’m slowly coming back to it. I love coloring things with alcohol markers. They blend just so beautiful. I also paint with acrylic paints aaand want to learn more about watercolors!

History - Eh, kinda random, but I watch a lot of stuff about how the daily lives of people in the past were - how did they do the laundry, how was the soap made, how did women deal with their periods, how did the underwear look, etc. I’ve read an amazing book on women in Medieval times!

CATS - everything cats. Literally. From cat related goods, to actual products for cats - litterboxes, cat litter, anything. I like researching cat behaviorism. That’s probably good tho, because I have three lovely little cat ladies ^^

Otome games - I write only for ikesen, but I’m playing ikevam too. I played ikerev, but gash, the game crushes all the time! :C Other than that, I’ve finished Masamune’s route in SLBP and it was enjoyable - it is only that the colour scheme of the interface makes my eyes burn. I do not mean to say that it is ugly or bad, it just hurts me - not in metaphorical sense, it really, literally tires me out and makes the experience unpleasant. I know it’s weird.

Last movie I watched: Oh. Em. The thing is, I do not know ^^” I plan to watch some Ghibli movies on Netflix, but haven’t got around to it just yet ^^” I don’t remember when was the last time I’ve watched a film other than that - I just can’t focus for long enough. Or I get too excited. Long story short - you don’t want to watch a movie with me. You really don’t.

Dream job: Teacher! I would want to teach math. I’ve seen far too many bright minds go dull because the parents couldn’t afford the private tutor and that is just sooo wrong. However, it means getting stuck in a dead end job and becoming the private tutor after the school - teachers are gravely underpaid in my country and frankly, I don’t know if I will be able to afford to become one.

Meaning behind URL: None. I just like Masamune & keep here all my stuff and the stuff I like. It makes me happy ^^

Tags: @missjudge-me, @fairstival, @nad-zeta , @metroidgirl0234 ! Hope you guys don’t mind ^^” If you don’t like the tag game, feel free to ignore it.

#blabbing #taggame #aww #i like tag games #justmethings

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kzesl · 5 years ago

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Kdrama: Moorim school-thoughts

I have a lot of feelings about Moorim School: Saga of the Brave, and guess what? I’m going to share. Fair warning, this post is probably going to be a jumbled mess. Like me. I’m a jumbled mess. Spoilers ahoy.

Meet everyone at the school. They all look dorky. Headmaster in the middle, students on the left and teachers on the right, with some overlap.

How I got into this one? I watched Secretly, greatly (ouch, my feels. I could write a long post about it. Stop me. Please.) and then I decided to see what else Lee Hyun Woo has acted in. Because he was an adorable badass in it, and I am weak.

Objectively speaking, Moorim school is not very good. I, however, don’t watch things objectively. Why be objective when you can be subjective? Right? Right. This is not a kdrama that I would recommend to anyone who has never watched a kdrama before. This is a drama for those who like certain, specific things in their dramas. I enjoyed it. Even though I had to increase the speed at times. I use Super Netflix extension occasionally, I admit.

What is it about?

This is the IMDb summary: Moorim School isn't focused on high academic scores. The school teaches students virtues including honesty, faith, sacrifice and communication. The teachers and students at the school come from different countries with their own stories.

These are the four main characters, from left to right: Wang Chi-Ang, Shim Soon-deok, Yoon Shi-Woo, and Hwang Sun-ah.

The intro is a bit misleading. It makes you expect badassery and mysticism, and instead you get a bunch of dorks arguing about who gets the bed with a good view though the window.

It starts with a man protecting a little girl, and fighting off a bunch of mean looking men, dressed in black (gasp! Bad guys) in the woods. The fight scenes are not exactly good. They make me cringe. It’s not high production. However, not every series can be like K2 when it comes to fight scenes. It’s a bit bad, because the series focuses on martial arts quite a bit, but eh. They managed to convey that the man protecting the girl is a badass. Let us move on and not mention the quality of action scenes again. He fights the bad guys off and hides with the girl behind a shield that he raises by activating magical symbols. (Magic is never explained. Everyone just accepts its existence. It’s not taught at the school either. It just exists and no one questions it.)

Then we jump to eighteen years later.

People are preparing for a concert, but the main star, the most popular member of k-pop group Möbius, Yoon Shi-Woo, is sleeping instead of rehearsing. He gets chewed out, but he is not overly concerned. He’s got bigger problems, like the splitting headaches and wonky hearing.

Next we meet Wang Chi-Ang, who is spoiled, sheltered momma’s boy, who only wants to make her happy and his father, the chairman of the Shang Hai group, proud. He’s in the city to go to the concert, because his father’s company is sponsoring it. Shi-Woo is a model for their company.

Shim Soon-deok is a resourceful young woman who is working hard to support herself and her blind father. She sells food at the concert, and she works at a chicken place. She also attends Moorim school. The ladies are badass in this series. Which is nice.

Hwang Sun-ah is Soon-deok’s friend and Shi-Woo’s biggest fan. She calls him my Shi-Woo (headcanon: she is the founder of his fan club. It is a secret she will take to her grave, because it feels a bit awkward when certain truths come to light. Headcanon 2: Shi-Woo knows, but lets her think he doesn’t.). She had to sneak out to go to the concert, because her father, the headmaster of Moorim school is overprotective.

There are a couple of shirtless scenes and Shi-Woo has a Very Important Necklace, which we know because the camera focuses on it a lot.

Chi-Ang and Shi-Woo are accidentally given the same room at a hotel. Oh, no. Who’s going to be the one to leave?!?! Chi-Ang attempts to throw his weight around and refuse to sponsor Shi-Woo, because everything is a competition for that man and he has to win. But Shi-Woo is unimpressed and uninterested and like cool, whatevs, day off.

That’s Shi-Woo there, in white. No fucks given. Can’t win against someone who’s not playing, Chi-Ang. Now this says a lot about their future relationship. Chi-Ang always tries to win, and Shi-Woo always refuses to compete.

The concert goes okay, until there is an accident on stage and Shi-Woo almost gets injured/dies because a piece of equipment starts falling on him and he doesn’t hear everyone shout at him to move because of the wonky hearing. He slows the equipment down with his surprise magical powers and Sun-ha manages to save him. She tells him to go to Moorim school, but doesn’t tell him how to get there (who needs directions, anyway).

Both he and Chi-Ang end up there in the end. Chi-Ang because his father insists (he has nefarious plans) and the girl he likes goes to the same school, and Shi-Woo because he wants help with his hearing. There is a possibility that he will permanently loose it and music is all he has. He is an orphan who has no one else in this world since his manager/father figure turned out to be all about the money. Also, the relationship he has with the rest of his group seems strictly professional. And Möbius was the name he used for himself before he was even scouted. So it predates the group. (I want to read a fic about group feels, or an AU where they are actually close.)

Also, the shield magically comes down when they come close to the school for the first time, and that was not supposed to happen and everyone is concerned. But that relates to the plot and the plot is a bit meh. I’m here for the relationships anyway. (Sigh. The plot had potential.)

Things happen, and I won’t go into detail, but the two of them get expelled, go on a quest, get accepted back into the school and become friends. BFFs.

The school teaches cooking, martial arts, manners (I think), dance (?), meditation, and no other subject, it seems. It is a very weird school, and the professors are weird and nothing makes sense, but okay. Not many things about this series make sense. Moorim was created to ensure world peace, apparently. And it’s a martial arts school, primarily, but they are more focused on teaching good values. There aren’t that many students in this school, and they are from all over. I’m not sure how students are actually recruited. The school is a secret. Are they scouted? Are they those connected to Moorim? Or those who get lost in the woods outside of the school? Who knows. Not me. They also seem to struggle financially because the heating is off. Why else would everyone sleep pretty much fully clothed?

The other students in the school get some screen time, but their characters are not all that well fleshed out, so I found myself not caring too much. It got a bit better in later episodes. One of them keeps badmouthing others in English, for some reason. It’s not like on one understands him. Everyone understands him. He just likes speaking English, I guess.

There is a mysterious man in a coma, villains, a magical key split into three pieces that can lead to unlimited power, reunited families, surprise siblings, etc.

Also, let’s ignore how quickly some people became good at martial arts. Now, I’m no expert, but I have a bit of experience in martial arts and I have known some extremely talented individuals, prodigies, but even they needed more than two months to get anywhere. I’m going to leave it at that. Magic is real in this universe. It’s magic. Problem solved.

The part I like the most about this series is the relationship between Chi-Ang and Shi-Woo. They start off as roommates who don’t like one another, so they fight a lot. It changes, but- Now I’m all for men being shown as having other male friends they can have healthy relationships with, someone they could lean on and cry in front of, if necessary, without toxic masculinity getting in the way. Let men be friends, yeah? And I’m not one who immediately sees gay in everything. But, those two guys have the hots for each other. They’re all: I came back for you/I stayed for you/I miss you/You mean more to me than unlimited power/You’re so cool-No you are/Don’t smile, I might start liking you.

Ahem.

They like the same girl (Soon-deok). Which seemed very hard for them, but I believe that was the best thing that could have happened to them. Soon-deok kept refusing Chi-Ang, and she was very clear about it. She drew the line at one point, and he made me very uncomfortable when he outright told her that he doesn’t care about her lines. This could have turned very ugly if his rival had been anyone other than Shi-Woo. He threatened to destroy Shi-Woo more than once, and he came close to irreparably destroying their relationship, but in the end he didn’t. Because Shi-Wook had so much faith in him, he couldn’t bear to. Again, if it had been anyone else, he wouldn’t have even hesitated. (Hmm, imagine a Dark AU. So many possibilities. )

I have the urge to write fic. Sigh.

Also, at one point the students have a party and Möbius’s song plays in the background and no one teases Shi-Woo about it or peer pressures him into doing his part of the song or the dance, or even looks at him while smirking. WTH. Come one, guys!

Back to the two leads. It’s an interesting dynamic they have. And although Chi-Ang is taller, physically stronger and more imposing, it’s Shi-Woo who’s actually in charge. And I’m not going to tell you to get your mind out of the gutter, because that’s exactly where mine is. And Chi-Ang looks like he might have a serious praise kink. Besides, we have seen that Shi-Woo is not shy about going after what he wants. As we saw with the two kissing scenes with Soon-deok, he is quietly assertive. Unlike Chi-Ang, who is more… bluster and need for attention.

Shi-Woo started as this arrogant, irritable superstar, but it didn’t take him long to shed that behavior, that image. As if, all this time, he was just waiting for a moment out of the spotlight, for a place where he can belong. He seems like one of those people who were born knowing which lines they are not willing to cross. His urge to harm someone is his greatest fear, because he is aware of the damage he is capable of inflicting.

Chi-Ang had different masks. He too knew loneliness, but his was of a different kind. While Shi-Woo was not protected enough, Chi-Ang was sheltered too much. His mother dotes on him, and his father adores him, albeit in his own, extremely unhealthy way. It was clear to me from the start that his father loves him. It seems a significant thing that he is the son of a mistress and not legitimate, but his father has made no attempt to hide him. He provides for him, protects him and spoils him. He has no kind words for him, though, and his lessons are poison, but he tried to make his son strong. Which is what he values. And he has used him. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t love him. He just doesn’t know how to love properly.

Chi-Ang takes after his father in many ways. We see that the most in later episodes. But he has people who have faith in him, and who are willing to tell him off. He is aware that he is wiling to cross too many lines, lines he shouldn’t. He is gray, and will probably always struggle with himself. He seems like a puppy most of the time, but when he is serious about something, his determination is a scary thing.

Shi-Woo would make a more terrifying villain, though. He wouldn’t become one, precisely because he terrifies himself when he thinks about what he could do, if pushed enough.

I could talk more about this series. There are quite a few touching moments I could cover, and also a lot of ridiculousness and wth moments, but there is a reason I didn’t do a recap of every episode. I don’t have time. Besides, I wrote all of this just to get it off my chest, because I have no fandom friends to discuss stuff with. It is sad.

Also, I should have broken up the text in this with a few more photos, but I’m tired.

#kdrama #korean drama #moorim school #headcanons meta fic musings

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minijenn · 5 years ago

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Universe Falls Chapter 67

AHHHHH TIME FOR MY LOVELY DIAMOND TO FINALLY SHINE!!!! But for reals I really like how this chapter turned out. ESPECIALLY towards its ending like holy shit things gonna go down and I am super hype for it all. Anyway, I won’t keep ya from it any longer than I need to. Enjoy!

Previous: (lol I forgot to post Peridot and Pacifica on here oh well too lazy to do it now bleh)

***

Chapter 67: Message Received

AFRRS, LGKUQ, FRBSGR, MBR TSAUI GDCA B RWKMZ HUSOFI UB GCBCW WTS KNJTK YBCB GIE WEDHV'F EEEMES HB DUL LQFGRMF XVAA DNJNXYX HWRT

It was an absolutely perfect summer evening. The low-arching sun splashed its warm, dying light across the vast grassy fields, casting long yet lofty shadows that almost seemed to dance across the barn’s weathered surface. A light, gentle breeze skimmed over the acres of farmland, as cricket songs began to echo throughout the hills, even as far as the open, forested valley where Gravity Falls sat far below. And this picturesque view was what the Gems were silently, contentedly enjoying, happy to have a much-earned moment’s rest after a long day at work on the drill. Though Ford had kept to the barn to work on a few odds and ends during this evening break, the kids readily joined in on it as they reclined up against Lion, easily relaxing as Steven strummed a pleasant tune on his ukulele. The trio would have been more than happy to let this peaceful scene continue for as long as possible, but of course, it all too quickly came to an end thanks to the interruption from a certain miffed green Gem.

“Ahem…” Peridot huffed as she stood over the kids. Her hands were positioned on her hips, a power drill clenched tightly in her grip from the work she was clearly intent on continuing.

“Oh, hi, Peridot!” Steven greeted her blithely.

“Welp, I knew this was too good to be true,” Dipper sighed sardonically as he sat up a bit. “What do you want, Peridot?”

“I want to know why we stopped working on the drill!” the green Gem scowled impatiently, nodding over to the Gems still watching the sunset several feet away. “Why are they just sitting there looking at nothing!?”

“Aw, Peri, we’re all just taking a nice little break,” Mabel grinned brightly.

“…A what?”

“We’ve all been working hard and we deserve to take it easy for a bit,” Steven explained. “I mean, just look at that view. It’s beautiful!”’

“It’s going to be blown to oblivion by the Cluster if we don’t get back to work!” Peridot countered crossly.

“Yeesh, tell us something we don’t know for a change,” Dipper remarked with something of a wry, knowing smirk.

“Working hard is important,” Steven added, still smiling calmly. “But feeling good is important too!”

“Yep,” Mabel soundly agreed. “Looks like you still need to learn about one more super important Earth concept, Peri. It’s called… ‘treat yo self’!”

“What are you talking about?!” Peridot fussed, thoroughly annoyed as she accidentally turned the power drill on.

“Hey!” Steven perked up upon hearing the buzzing drill. “What is that, a C?” The young Gem copied the noise on his ukulele, strumming a simple C chord that did, in fact, mimic the buzzing of the drill itself.

“The drill?” Peridot raised a confused eyebrow, looking to the tool in her hand.

“Yeah!” Steven nodded, rising to his feet as Peridot pressed the drill up to an even faster speed. Or rather, an even higher note. “Oh my gosh! Now its music!”

“Whoa! It sorta is!” Mabel gasped, amazed.

“Only Steven could hear music in something like a power drill,” Dipper chuckled, amused.

“‘Music’?” Peridot asked. “What’s that?”

“Whaaaaa?! You don’t know what music is?!” Mabel exclaimed, aptly baffled. “Oh, girl, you are missing out!”

“Look, its like this,” Steven positioned his ukulele before strumming out a simple scale and singing along. “Do, re, mi, fa, so, la, ti, do!”

“Do, mi, so, do…?” Peridot repeated, clearly not following.

“Isn’t it pretty?” the young Gem sang, still singing along.

“That’s exceedingly simple,” the green Gem snarked, though she still mused on the beguiling process all the same. “Do, mi, so, it…”

“We’re making music.”

“What’s the point?” Peridot said, crossing her arms.

“The point, is… its fun!” Mabel chimed in, singing a bright note of her own in tune with Steven’s strumming.

“But why even bother?” the green Gem shook her head. “You’re not even making anything!”

“Well, if it isn’t anything, then why does it sound so good?” Steven asked with a good-natured shrug.

“I suppose its just interest, do, mi, so, do,” Peridot theorized as the young Gem kept his lighthearted tune going. “Devoid of substance or purpose, a hypothetical pattern… do, mi, so, ti… For the satisfaction of bringing it to completion!”

“…Sure,” Steven agreed, even if he didn’t really know what she was talking about.

“Should we tell her music isn’t usually that deep?” Dipper asked Mabel, aside.

“Eh, let her have her sciencey fun,” Mabel shrugged.

“Do, mi, so, it… Interest without meaning?” Peridot posed, surprised by such an odd train of thought. One that largely went against everything she had ever known back on Homeworld, much like everything else on Earth as a whole. “Solutions without problems…?”

“And then you just add words,” Steven said, gearing up for a proper song. “Here’s what I’ve been working on. Life and death and love and birth and peace and war on the planet Earth.” The melody was light and bouncy, carrying a message of the immense complexities and contradictions of the planet it was about, a theme that was not lost on Mabel, Dipper, or even Peridot as they all listened intently. “Is there anything that’s worth more than peace and love on the planet Earth, oh-whoooa, come on and sing it with me!”

“Sing?” Peridot repeated, still completely lost.

“The words relate to the key!”

“Key?!” the green Gem asked, even more baffled as she held a small key she had found in the barn up.

“If it’s a pattern, if it’s a pattern, than just repeat after me,” Steven encouraged, nodding over to the twins in the hopes that they’d do the same. Mabel was quick to jump on the offer first as she joined the young Gem in a brief duet. “Life and death and love and birth-”

“L-Life and death and love and birth,” Peridot attempted, albeit a bit shakily. After all, she had never really sung before, and until now, she had never had a reason to.

“C’mon, bro-bro, join in!” Mabel urged her brother in an excitable whisper. “Our plan is working!”

“First of all, you guys didn’t start this whole music thing off with any sort of ‘plan’,” Dipper retorted before finally breaking down into a small, if not somewhat flustered smile. “B-but, fine, just this once.”

“Now, you sing mi, fa, mi, mi, fa, mi, ti, la!” Steven instructed Peridot, who followed along easy enough as all four of them finished the chorus on a high, harmonious note.

“And peace and war on the planet Earth!”

“Ahhh! That sounded so good!” Mabel cheered happily. “Looks like its time to bring Love Patrol Alpha outta retirement with its brand new member, Peri!”

“I have no idea what that’s supposed to mean,” Peridot remarked dryly. “But what I do know is that was so easy,” she finished, as if suspicious by that fact.

“Yeah, but that’s what’s so fun about it!” Steven nodded, still strumming. “You should write something—you should write a song!”

“About what?”

“Whatever you’re thinking!”

While Peridot still didn’t largely understand the functional purpose of music or songs, she decided to take the young Gem up on this challenge and do exactly that. Making use of the rhyming patterns and lyrical progression similar to Steven’s song, the green Gem spent the rest of the evening crafting out her tune. A tune that, once it reached what she believed to be a satisfactory standard, she decided to present to not just the kids, but the other Gems and Ford as well that night around the fire.

“I guess we’re already here,” she began, standing before the collective group as they all listened in, intrigued and also slightly confused by the green Gem, of all people, suddenly bursting into song. “I guess we already know. We’ve all got something to fear, we’ve all got nowhere to go-”

Admittedly, the message of her melody was a bit disconcerting, or at least it was to the Gems as it reminded them of the dire straits they were up against when it came to the Cluster. Still, Steven, Mabel, and even Dipper nodded Peridot their silent encouragement as she carried on with the rest of her undoubtably passionate preformance.

“I think you’re all INSANE!” she accused truthfully. For certainly, a group of Gems and humans so dedicated to preserving a planet as bizarre and outlandish as Earth had to be out of their right minds. But then again, Peridot couldn’t claim to be much better, given the same goal they were all working towards together. “But I guess I am too… Anybody would be if they were stuck on Earth with you!”

A round of genuinely amused chuckles from the others followed suit, one that Peridot couldn’t help but take pride over, especially as Mabel and Steven both cheered her on even further. On Homeworld, such a display of pointless, aimless expression would have been scoffed off at best, punishable for at worst. But here, on Earth, this sort of thing was welcome, accepted, commonplace even. It was so strange, so unlike anything the green Gem had ever known that she couldn’t help but appreciate it all in some odd way. Because here, there were no expectations or set standards about what a Gem, or a human for that matter, could do or be. Here, anyone could do or say or think anything they wanted. Here, anyone and, at least as far as she’d seen, everyone was free.

“Life and death and love and birth and-”

Peridot remained slightly mystified by this newfound revelation as the next several days carried on, progress on the drill going sound and steady. The large number of hands on the project certainly made the work much lighter for everyone, as they all had their assigned tasks to carry out in inching towards its completion.

“Life and death and love and birth and-”

Over the course of the drill’s construction, Peridot had largely formed a steady rapport with all of the members of her once-tentative alliance. Amethyst was likely the first among these new bonds she had formed among the Crystal Gems at least. The purple Gem was, at least in her opinion, crass and loud and far too outspoken and brazen for her own good, especially considering the solid soldier status she had originally been created for. But gradually the green Gem had found herself growing used to Amethyst’s playful jabs and ridiculous quips, to the point that she could easily say that she respected her for the Gem she was rather than the Gem she had been made to be.

“Life and death and love and birth and peace and war on the planet earth.”

Peridot couldn’t deny that she had been forced to more or less swallow her pride when it came to her dealings with Pearl and Ford. The fact that each of them had an acute, impressive intellect that clearly rivaled her own was a bitter pill to swallow, but one that the green Gem largely had all the same. And in wake of her former bitterness towards the pair, she had found they actually had quite a bit in common, particularly when it came to their shared affinity for technology and science. Over just a few weeks, Peridot had gone from coldly shunning any tips or advice they had to offer on these fronts, to eagerly joining in the exchange of knowledge alongside the author and the white Gem, her former prejudices against them all but forgotten.

“Is there anything that’s worth more?”

It had largely taken Peridot the most time to grow accustomed to Garnet out of anyone else. On Homeworld, fusion between two entirely different types of Gems was a massive taboo, so the Gem leader’s very existence had originally offended the green Gem for reasons she found she wasn’t able to explain. It had taken her quite a bit of time to look past that singular fact, but once she had, she was actually able to see that Garnet was more than just the fusion that composed her existence. The Gem leader was brave, stable, sensible, and most of all patient, even with Peridot and all of her harsh words and sneers and insults she had once had for her and her teammates. And, when push came to shove, that was something Peridot wasn’t about to ignore, even despite however the rest of Homeworld would think of a Gem such as her.

“Is there anything that’s worth more?”

Limited as they were when it came to more of the heavy lifting, the kids still pitched in as much as they could. Since Dipper was largely able to keep up with Pearl and Ford and even Peridot when it came to the scientific side of the drill’s construction, that’s where most of his contributions were found. Steven and Mabel were less versed in the technicalities of the machine, but what they lacked in knowledge, they made up for in helpful enthusiasm. While Peridot had initially callously rebuffed their meager assistance, over time she had gradually come to accept it, perhaps even welcome it when it came to tasks that were too much for her to handle on her own. Overall, the concept of ‘friendship’ was still a new one to her, one that she only really had the information provided to her by Steven and Mabel to go off of. But if what she’d heard of it truly was correct, than it was safe to say that, like it or not, she had come to make friends of just about all of them, as odd and impossible as that might have once seemed.

“Is there anything that’s worth more than peace and love on the planet earth?”

***

It had taken quite a bit of time and a tremendous amount of work, but after weeks of plentiful effort from everyone involved, the drill was finally complete. The entire group stood admiring their handiwork, which was admittedly quite impressive. Despite its notably small cockpit, the drill’s point was sharp and formidable, fortified by titan’s ore to the point that there was no doubt it’d be able to penetrate the surface of the earth easily and safely. And hopefully, this machine, the product of their teamwork and determination, would be enough to end the threat that the Cluster posed to the planet Earth once and for all.

“Nice work,” Garnet congratulated Peridot in particular, giving the green Gem a friendly pat on the back for her hard work. It was enough to startle Peridot though, to the point that she flinched and took up a brief defensive stance, eliciting a collective amused laugh from the others.

“W-we really did it, huh?” Peridot asked, turning towards the drill with something of a small, proud smile.

“We?!” Steven gasped with sudden delight over the ongoing comradery.

“Heck yeah we did!” Mabel cheered, pulling out her camera. “C’mon, everyone get in close! My scrapbook just won’t be complete without a picture of our awesome drill!”

The others all gladly obliged as they bunched in together in front of the drill, all of them smiling (save for Peridot, who was rather confused as to what was going on in general) while Mabel snapped the photo. A memento that would be sure to memorialize their success long after the Cluster was gone and the drill had fulfilled its purpose.

“It is quite impressive, isn’t it?” Ford mused with a grin, looking back at the drill. “And with such a quick turn-around time too! Then again, I suppose we had no choice but to be quick with this, given the circumstances…”

“Oh wait!” Peridot interjected. “That reminds me, I need to check something!” The green Gem hurried over to the drill, rummaging around inside its cockpit as the others stood by, their spirits still collectively high over the machine’s completion.

“She’s come so far…” Steven noted happily, looking over towards Peridot from afar. “It feels like just yesterday that she was fusing with Bill and trying to kill us…”

“No, no,” Pearl shook her head. “That was several week ago.”

“Still, it really doesn’t feel like it was that long ago…” Dipper said just as thoughtfully. “Its kinda crazy to think that that Peridot used to be this Peridot,” he grinned as he nodded over to the green Gem, who clumsily face-planted after falling off of the drill before frantically running back over to the group.

“Coordinates!” Peridot shouted starkly. “We still need the Cluster’s exact coordinates in order to drill to it!”

“Uh, don’t we already know where it is?” Mabel asked with a confused frown. “It’s buried suuuuuper deep underground, right? Which means we could just bam!” She punched her fist dramatically, making a brief drilling noise as she did. “Drill right on down there and kiss that big bad Cluster goodbye!”

“Theoretically, yes, but I understand Peridot’s concern,” Ford agreed. “Regardless of how massive the Cluster might be, we’ll still need to know just how far down past the surface of the Earth it is. But who knows how we’d even access that information in the first place?”

“A-actually…” Pearl spoke up, apparently apprehensive as she averted eye contact with the others. “There’s a Diamond Base that may have those coordinates, but…. Getting there is going to be difficult.”

“How come?” Steven asked.

“Because its not accessible by warp pad. And it’s on….” The white Gem trailed off, directing her gaze, as well as everyone else’s to the bright nightly orb far above them all.

“The moon?!” Steven, Mabel, and even Dipper asked in awestruck unison.

“Yes, the moon,” Pearl replied rather flatly.

“Uh, how are supposed to get all the way up there?” Amethyst asked, hands on her hips. “I mean, we can jump pretty high, but I don’t think any of us can jump that high.”

“Hm, I suppose we have no choice but to construct a lighter-than-air spacecraft,” Ford concluded staunchly. “I’ve never really dabbled too much in advanced interstellar aeronautics before, but as far as I’m concerned, there’s never a bad time to learn!”

“Uh, actually, we’ve sorta been there, done that with the whole build-your-own-rocket thing, Great Uncle Ford…” Dipper pointed out. “It… didn’t really go all that well…”

“Wait, I know!” Steven exclaimed, turning to his pink feline companion as he snoozed peacefully in the grass nearby. “Lion! Can you make us a super special warp to the moon?”

Despite the young Gem’s enthusiasm, Lion responded dully, letting out a long yawn before rolling over to continue his nap. “Come on, Lion, we gotta do this to stop the Cluster!” Steven urged, flopping down on top of his still-sleeping pet. “If we don’t there’s gonna be no more Earth! No more fun times with your pal Waddles… no more Lion Lickers… no more naps-”

Apparently, this plea was somehow enough to call the pink beast to action, for he instantly perked up, rising from his nap as his eyes took on a pale white glow. While the others looked to Lion at absolute amazement at this shift, Steven simply stood by with a satisfied grin over his pet’s eventual compliance. “Guess it was naps.”

“Um, not that this moon trip doesn’t sound cool and all,” Dipper spoke up, aptly hesitant. “But how exactly are we supposed to breathe up there? I mean, I know its not a big deal to you guys,” he said to the Gems. “But its sort of important for the rest of us…”

“Oh, there’s no need to worry about that, Dipper,” Pearl assured. “The Moon Base has its own self-contained adaptable internal atmosphere that should be perfectly livable for any human.”

“Wow, Pearl, you sure do know a lot about this Moon Base place,” Mabel remarked with a curious grin. “Have you ever been there before?”

The white Gem let out a rather sharp, forced laugh at this, tension rising in her shoulders as she quickly rebuffed the question. “W-who me? D-don’t be silly, of course not! I-I’ve only ever… heard about it! T-that’s why I know so much about it!” The others all gave her something of a confused look at this haphazard outburst, but once again, Pearl deflected them all before any further questions could be posed. “N-now come on! We haven’t a moment to waste! Let’s get those coordinates!”

Since no one could really argue with such a vigorous command, the group was quick to follow after the white Gem to do exactly that. It took some doing, planning, and careful squeezing to fit everyone onto Lion (or in several cases, into his mane) all at the same time, but eventually they managed to figure it out. The pink beast hardly seemed labored by his many passengers as he instantly broke into a rapid sprint. His speed only seemed to pick up with each quick step he made across the wide fields until, suddenly, he let out an immense, mighty roar. The pounding sound was enough to pierce a hole into the very fabric of space itself, creating a large, glowing portal that he barreled into at top speeds. Lion’s large group of riders all held on for dear life, with only Steven and Mabel really enjoying the breakneck, wild trip as the pink beast roared another portal into existence. He continued this is steady succession, somehow increasing his speed each time as he ripped through each and every portal like a bolt of lighting across a stormy sky. Eventually, the collection of continuous portals became so radiantly bright that it practically blinded all of them, especially as they neared their destination. And once they did, everything seemed to finally stop all at once.

The space they landed in was large and dark, though none of them had a chance to take it in as Lion crashed out of his final portal, sliding across the floor before slamming into a far wall and knocking the Gems and Ford clean off his back. “Lion! Are you ok, bud?” Steven gasped, immediately alarmed to see that the impact had knocked the wind out of his pink pet. Fortunately though, Lion seemed no worse for wear as he took a much-needed moment to rest in light of all of the power he had just exerted.

“Aw, you poor baby!” Mabel gushed, generously rubbing the pink beast’s mane. “Who’s a good magical portal-maker? You are! You are!”

“I-incredible…” Ford mused, adjusting his glasses as he picked himself up off the ground. “I knew that lion was unusual, but I could have never guessed it was capable of something like this. Clearly, I’ll have to do more research on him in order to-” The author was quick to retract the hand he had extended out to Lion as the pink beast growled in warning protest. “O-on second thought, I suppose that could always wait for… some other time.”

“We made it,” Pearl spoke up, her tone serious as her gemstone emitted a bright light for them all to see by. Sure enough, the peaceful nighttime landscape of the farmlands were gone, replaced by cold sterile walls and floors that clearly hadn’t been touched in ages. Each of the rounded walls were adorned with what looked to be large murals, though without direct light upon them, it was hard to make out exactly what they were supposed to be of.

“Huh, weird…” Dipper mused, glancing around curiously. “You know, I sort of expected the moon to look more like… I dunno, the moon?”

“Well it sure is bouncy like the moon is supposed to be!” Mabel chimed in, taking advantage of the lack of gravity to take a high, unfettered leap into the air. “Come on, bro-bro, you’ve got to try this!”

“Mabel, I don’t know if that’s such a good—w-whoa!” Dipper gasped in alarm as Mabel suddenly yanked him up into the air along with her before sending him spinning freely high above the ground, despite his best attempts to anchor himself back to the ground.

“Hah! Look at me!” Steven chimed in, joining in on the anti-gravity antics as he let himself float freely. “I’m a moon boy!”

“Yeah! Alright, moon boy!” Amethyst cheered him on, leaping to join the kids up in the air, only to end up falling right back to the ground instead. “Hey! Why can’t I be a moon boy?!”

“We’re Gems,” Peridot pointed out with a scoff. “We’re a space-faring race designed to conquer other worlds. Our physical forms adjust automatically to the gravity of any planetoid.”

“Aww… lame,” the purple Gem groaned, sticking her tongue out in disappointment. Right behind her, Dipper and Mabel softly landed on the floor in a jumbled heap of limbs as Ford hurried over to help them up, all while trying to stay grounded himself.

“You know, it just occurred to me that I probably should have told Stanley we were going to the moon…” the author noted as he carefully pulled his nibblings up to stand. “…Ah well, I’m sure he wouldn’t mind.”

“Uh… yeah…” Dipper said, exchanging an uneasy glance with Mabel as they remembered just how harshly the conman had reacted to their last attempt at a trip to the stars. “We… probably shouldn’t tell him about this, just… just ‘cause.”

“I was bouncin’ on the moon one day!” Steven sang brightly as he continued free-floating, only to end up smacking into one of the walls and hitting the ground a moment later. He let out a small groan as he picked himself up off the floor, only to spot the large mural of what looked like a tall, elegant woman on the wall beside him. “Huh? Hey, Peridot! Who’s this supposed to be?”

The green Gem gasped as she shined the light of her own gemstone up at the mural, recognizing the blue, cloaked, graceful figure well. “It’s Blue Diamond!” she exclaimed, taking on an air of immediate reverence before the massive mural. “W-wait! Are they all here? Ah, yes!” Peridot rushed over to the far side of the chamber, where another similar depiction of a different, but still just as regal figure, awaited. “There she is!”

“There who is?” Mabel inquired curiously as her and Dipper joined the pair before mural.

“Behold!” Peridot proclaimed dramatically as she threw an arm out at the stern, stately woman on the wall before her. “Yellow Diamond! Isn’t she magnificent?”

“Uh… sure…” Dipper deadpanned, not particularly impressed.

“Whoa…” Mabel mused, much more fascinated. “She has a really long neck. Like a giraffe!”

“W-wha—you can’t just say something like that about the Yellow Diamond!” Peridot chastised, offended. “Whatever a so-called ‘giraffe’ is…”

“So, who are the Diamonds anyway?” Steven asked. “They seem like a pretty big deal.”

“Are you joking me?!” Peridot scoffed. “The Diamonds are the Gem matriarchs! Together, they make up the Great Diamond Authority that governs Homeworld and all the outlying colonies. We live to serve them!”

The green Gem’s explanation was cut short from a disgruntled hum from Garnet. The Gem leader stood over them, her expression cold and disapproving, a look that both Pearl and Amethyst shared. Even Ford seemed to be bitterly averting his gaze away from the Diamond murals for some reason, making it quite apparent that not everyone seemed to share Peridot’s high opinion of them. “I-I mean…” she recanted with a bit of an anxious laugh. “We were all made to serve them, even if some of us… don’t anymore.” A beat of awkward silence passed at this, though Peridot was quick to fill it by hastily changing the topic altogether. “H-hey! I think that’s a control service over there! Let’s take a look!”

Steven and Mabel readily hurried after the green Gem, curious to see more of the mysterious Moon Base. Dipper, however, did stop short to steal just another somewhat distrustful glance at the visage of Yellow Diamond on the wall before him before moving on with the others. Likewise, Garnet and Pearl in particular exchanged something of an uneasy glance before turning away, both of them knowing all too well exactly who the Diamonds were and what they were capable of.

“I think this is right…” Peridot muttered, examining a nearby panel on the floor. “The material is different from the surrounding stone. If I just do this…” She trailed off, pressing the panel, which in turn, emerged from the ground, alongside several others to create something of a floating staircase all around the edges of the base’s central chamber. The green Gem let out a bright giggle at her discovery, beside herself with excitement over getting to see a space that so few other Gems would ever have the chance to visit.

“This is so incredible!” Peridot gushed as they began making their way up the long, winding staircase. “Only the most elite of the elite can enter these sanctums. We are literally walking in the footsteps of the Diamonds!”

“They must really like stairs,” Steven pointed up as he bounded up them.

“Ooo, what’s this cool glowy orb room?” Mabel asked as they passed through to a higher part of the tower. Sure enough, the room was engulfed in darkness, its only notable feature being the large, rotating spherical light floating in the center of it, its purpose more or less completely unknown.

“Its not what we came here for,” Garnet said sternly, pressing on ahead.

“Can we hurry it up?” Amethyst asked with a huff of impatience. “This place gives me the creeps.”

Since they had get to get what they’d come here for in the first place, no one protested as they finished scaling the lengthy floating stairway, only to finally emerge at the tower’s top. Compared to the base they had arrived in, this deck’s walls were composed almost entirely of clear class windows, giving an open, grand view of the lunar landscape surrounding the structure. The pale, cratered surface of the moon stretched far and wide in every direction, the dark, star-speckled expanses of space itself hanging high above. It was an incredible view, to put it simply, one that the kids all took in with apt awe as they took a moment to pause and take it all in.

“W-we really are on the moon…” Steven practically whispered, completely stunned.

“I can’t believe it…” Dipper shook his head, just as amazed. “I mean, talking about it is one thing, but… we’re actually here, like its nothing. This is totally insane and honestly? I love it!”

“So do I!” Steven quipped, sharing Dipper’s bright smile.

“Ah, I wish I could join in on the excitement you boys are feeling,” Ford said wistfully as he put a hand on each of their shoulders. “But after traversing countless dimensions far beyond the realms of plausible imagination, the surface of the moon is… relatively underwhelming by comparison.”

“Oh my goodness!” Peridot suddenly squeaked, catching everyone’s attention. The others all joined her near the large white throne at the center of the room, coupled by a pristine table surface resting before it. “This looks like it could be brand new!” the green Gem exclaimed, running her hands over the table. “I mean, it’s a relic by today’s standards, but golly! Its so elegant! So simple! So perfect!”

“Ooo! And it makes a great whiteboard too!” Mabel quipped as she drew a smiley face onto the otherwise spotless surface with a marker she had happened to bring, much to Peridot’s horror.

“Stop that this instant!” the green Gem huffed, snatching the pen away from her. “You’re desecrating an important tool of the Diamonds themselves! Do you have any idea how disrespectful that is?!”

“…Huh. Well, disrespectful or not, it does brighten things up a little in here,” Mabel said, taking on a wide grin to match the smile she had drawn on the table. “See?”

“No,” Peridot deadpanned sullenly.

“Hey! Its got one of those glowy hand dealies!” Steven pointed out from his spot on the throne behind them.

“Y-you can’t sit there!” Peridot chastised hotly.

“Why not? Its really cool.”

“That chair is only for the most elite Gems,” the green Gem explained, exasperated. “You can’t just go around sitting where an elite would sit!”

“Well, they aren’t here now, right?” Steven grinned, patting on the ample space next to him on the throne. Peridot hesitated in taking him up on his offer before finally folding, climbing up to join him and laughing in spite of herself over the forbidden pleasure of the act.

“So, uh, what’s this thing supposed to be?” Dipper asked, casually plucking a pale, crystal-like object embedded on the chair’s armrest.

“Put that back!” Peridot fussed before turning her attention to the other controls the throne had to offer. “Hm, ok… let’s see here…” The green Gem experimentally pressed a button, which brought the throne much closer to the control panel, allowing her to properly activate it and begin searching through its holographically projected screens for the data they needed. “Ugh, this is a really old system…” she noted to the others as she began picking through what the panel had to offer. “Just gotta find the right file and… aha!” The projection filled with various graphs, maps, and other information, all of which clearly regarded the Cluster, which Peridot readily translated out for all the others. “There’s the insertion point. Looks like the Beta Kindergarten in Facet Nine. It’s the smaller of the two, not nearly as impressive as yours, Amethyst.”

“Uh… thanks?” the purple Gem shrugged dully.

“But where is the Cluster now?” Pearl asked, a hint of urgency in her tone.

“Hang on… oh! There it is!” A diorama popped up, depicting the vague shape of the Cluster itself, buried deep under the surface of the Earth. Where it would hopefully remain until their drill finally put an end to it. “It’s embedded deep into the mantle. Relative to the barn is roughly two thousand, five hundred units down. All we need to do is feed this data to the drill and we should be all set.”

“T-that’s it then!” Pearl said, pleasantly surprised. “Mission accomplished!”

“Go team!” Steven cheered brightly over their success.

“Huh, its not often that something like this goes this smoothly,” Dipper noted. “Weird.”

“Weird or not, let’s get the heck outta here,” Amethyst remarked, already leading the way back towards the stairs. “The moon is way more boring than I thought it’d be.”

“Wait! Maybe it doesn’t have to be!” Mabel chimed in, glancing back over the control panel. “Hey, Peri, does this thing have any games on it? Or movies?”

“Pfft, no,” Peridot scoffed. “This wasn’t used for ‘games’ or ‘movies’. It was used for planning the colony. Here, look.” The green Gem activated another file, which just so happened to catch the dwindling attention of the others as they looked over the projection of the planet Earth before them. “So here’s a map of all structures that were originally built on Earth,” Peridot scrolled through a list of the blueprints for structures that included the Galaxy Warp, the Kindergarten, and several others. “All told, this probably only accounts for maybe five percent of what was originally planned.”

“What was the plan?” Steven asked, somewhat apprehensive to find out.

“Well, let’s take a look.” With a single press of a button, the holographic Earth rapidly deteriorated, massive gaps cutting through its surface, its landmasses ruined and its oceans drained, replaced by an inhospitable mess of a planet conquered by Gems and Gems alone. A horrific sight to everyone present, given its implications. All except for, unsurprisingly, Peridot. “Ta da! A finished Earth colony!” she exclaimed proudly. “Just look at this! 89 Kindergartens, 67 spires, a Galaxy Warp in each facet, efficient use of all available materials! What were you thinking shutting this operation down? It could have been great!”

“No!” Garnet exclaimed suddenly, sharply. “You’re wrong!”

“What are you talking about?” Peridot sneered, baffled. “Its perfect! Look at it!”

“We are looking at it,” Pearl said coldly.

“Yeah! This plan stinks!” Amethyst huffed, properly angry.

“Completing this colony would have meant the extinction of all life on Earth!” Garnet said, just as upset by indeed, what could have been.

“And I thought Cipher’s intentions for the Earth were bad…” Ford muttered to himself, shaking his head. “This is… well, I don’t know if I’d say its worse, but I’d certainly say its arguably just as terrible.”

“Seriously…” Dipper shuddered in fearful disgust. “I mean, we knew Homeworld was awful, but this… this is on a whole other level…”

“Well, it could have been on a whole other level,” Peridot remarked rather callously. “If it had actually been allowed to reach its full potential. Think of the good it could have done! The Gems that would’ve been made, our empire expanded!”

“And all that would have been lost along with it…” Pearl continued bitterly, shamefully. “Rose Quartz believed all life was precious and worth protecting. That’s why she risked everything to stop this colony from happening!”

“Well, if she wanted to protect it, she did a lousy job!” Peridot argued back haughtily. “There’d be no Cluster if the Earth had stayed a colony. Now there’s no colony, and there’s gonna be no Earth. So thank you, Rose Quartz! You doomed the planet!”

A thick cloud of hostile tension pierced the air at this, outraged silence remaining in light of the green Gem’s snide, thoughtless remarks. Wishing for the completion of Homeworld’s twisted, destructive plans for Earth were one thing; but mocking Rose and her bravery and sacrifice was something that Garnet, Amethyst, Pearl, and even Ford, all of whom had known her personally while Peridot had not, could not simply ignore. Their sharp, furious glares were focused entirely on the green Gem alone, something that the kids instantly noticed more than Peridot did herself. And while Dipper couldn’t really find that much of a reason to rush to the green Gem’s defense after everything she’d just said, Steven and Mabel tried to all the same.

“Heh, aw, y-you guys know Peri!” Mabel shrugged, laughing nervously. “Always sayin’ wacky stuff she totally doesn’t really mean… right?”

“What?” Peridot countered, confused and clearly not about to recant her stance.

“Y-yeah!” Steven rushed to chime in and quell the swelling anger from his guardians in particular. “A-after all, don’t forget: I-is there anything that’s worth more tha-”

The young Gem instantly went silent the moment Garnet snatched Peridot up from her seat by the front of her uniform, keeping a tight grip as she stared down at her with unseen, untold amounts of ferocity. “You,” she began, her voice edged with tranquil rage as the green Gem’s frightened image reflected back at her through the Gem leader’s visor. “Listen to me. Now. You are talking about things that you do not understand.”

Steven gasped the moment he saw a gauntlet materialize around the Gem leader’s free hand, and even though he didn’t agree with the green Gem’s poor choice of words and actions, he knew he couldn’t allow this hostility to continue any further. “Garnet, stop!” he pleaded fearfully. “P-please, its… its not worth it. We’re done here; we got what we came for. L-let’s just… go home…”

Acting upon the young Gem’s nearly tearful request and nothing else, Garnet did as he said, loosening her grip on Peridot and allowing her to clumsily fall to the floor. And then, in a single swift, powerful swing, the Gem leader brought her gauntlet down upon the control panel before her, smashing it—as well as the last remnants of the fortunately failed colony it contained—beyond all hope of repair. Without a word, the Gems turned to leave the same way they’d came, Ford joining them as they all turned their back on the green Gem, on the moon base, on everything they knew Rose had fought so hard to stop in its tracks.

“Tch, figures you still haven’t really learned anything,” Dipper was the first to speak up as he also prepared to leave, though not before sending one final, clearly disappointed remark Peridot’s way. “Even still, after all this time. Honestly, I can’t even say I’m surprised, knowing you.”

“Aw, come on, Dipper,” Mabel hurried after him as he turned on his heel and walked off. “That’s not fair and you know it!”

“What’d I say?” Peridot asked as the twins left. “I was just stating a fact. The rebellion didn’t really ‘save’ Earth, it just delayed the inevitable.”

Steven sighed upon hearing this, partially taking up Dipper’s line of reasoning that, even after all this time and everything that had happened, Peridot was still just as stuck in her stubborn ways as ever. “That’s not the way they see it,” he nodded after his guardians sadly. “They’ve spent thousands of years trying to protect the Earth. I thought… maybe… you finally understood why… But I guess… I guess I was wrong…” The young Gem sighed once more, shaking his head forlornly. He had thought Peridot had come so far, from the hand ship, from her time on the run, from Pyrite. He had thought she had grown and learned and come to appreciate the Earth and all it had to offer from her extended stay there. He had thought… that they all were finally, finally friends.

But in the end, none of that had mattered as much to Peridot as it had to him, clearly.

Steven only paused briefly at the foot of the platform the throne rested on, noticing that the green Gem hadn’t come down along with him. He knew they couldn’t very well leave her there, especially given they still had a mission to complete, and despite his rather mixed feelings about her at the moment, he still called up to her all the same. “Peridot!”

“What? I’m coming!” Peridot retorted, hurrying town the steps. Steven watched her silently as though he froze in sudden confusion upon catching the briefest flash of something in the green Gem’s hand as she passed him by. Something she hadn’t had when they arrived there, and something he knew, she clearly wasn’t supposed to have.

“Let’s go, you two,” Garnet called from the larger staircase and Peridot didn’t hesitate to hurry on ahead. Steven hesitated for another brief moment however, keeping his sights on the green Gem alone as he wondered with a sense of newfound worry and fledgling distrust exactly what it was she planned to do.

***

The trip back from the moon to the barn was silent and awkward, to say the least. After Peridot’s haughty remarks concerning the rebellion and Rose Quartz, neither the Gems nor Ford were too keen on carrying on any sort of conversation with the green Gem, despite the kids’ best efforts to break the thick tension. All the same, the collective group made it back to Earth aboard Lion safe and sound, carrying with them the final piece needed to complete their extensive work on the drill. A victory that, by all accounts, should have felt much more triumphant than it actually did.

“So how much longer ‘till we can use the drill?” Amethyst asked with a huff of impatience as they all gathered around said drill once more.

“Well, with the new coordinates we got from the Moon Base,” Pearl began. “It should be ready to go. But we really should preform some tests first…”

“Still, it stands to reason that we should be able to take it down to the Cluster itself within the next few days, at least,” Ford theorized, glancing up at the drill. “That is… if we even have that much time left.”

Despite the pertinence and importance of the ongoing discussion, Steven, Dipper, and Mabel were all only barely listening in on it. All three of them were preoccupied by a number of contrasting thoughts and feelings, from muted frustration on Dipper’s part, to fretful worry on Mabel’s, to growing suspicion on Steven’s. Suspicion that was entirely focused on one certain green Gem and the unknown device the young Gem had seen her secretly snatch away from the Moon Base.

In fact, in the last hour or so alone, Steven’s suspicion and apprehension had grown so much that he found he couldn’t really keep it to himself any longer. For all he knew, it could have very well been nothing, which was why he had decided against voicing his concerns to the Gems. So instead, he chose to confide in someone who was sure to both believe him and help him get to the bottom of things: the twins.

“Hey, can I talk to you guys for a second?” Steven whispered to Dipper and Mabel while everyone was still distracted with the drill. “A-alone?”

While neither of them knew where the clear dread in the young Gem’s tone was coming from, neither Dipper nor Mabel denied his request as they all slipped away to gather just shy of the barn’s entrance. As soon as they were out of the Gems’ earshot, Steven turned to them with a clear sense of urgency, one that caught them both off guard, even as he spoke his piece.

“I didn’t wanna worry the Gems or Mr. Ford, especially since we’re so close to being done with the drill,” he began, glancing down. “But… I-I think Peridot might be up to something.”

“What, you mean aside from offending everyone by wishing that the Earth had been hallowed from the inside out?” Dipper retorted somewhat sardonically.

Mabel, on the other hand, was much more genuine in her response. “W-what do you mean she’s up to something?” she asked, the slightest hint of fear in her tone. Fear that the green Gem could very well be slipping out of the progress she had made and back into her old, sinister ways.

“I… I saw her take something from the Moon Base while we were leaving,” Steven explained. “I’m not sure what it is, but… I just… I have a bad feeling about it.”

“Well, who can blame you?” Dipper said, crossing his arms. “Peridot pretty much just proved that she hasn’t changed a bit. Heck, for all we know, her trying to ‘get along’ with us could of just been one giant act this whole time. A way to trick us into thinking she’s ok before she comes in with another hairbrained attempt at destroying us so she can get back to Homeworld or something.”

“B-but then why would she work so hard to help us with the drill?” Mabel cut in, anxiously, earnestly. “Dipper, I know you’ve never really trusted Peridot, and I know Grunkle Ford and the Gems are all super miffed with her right now, b-but I don’t think she wants to hurt us or the Earth anymore! You even said so yourself: the Peridot we know now isn’t the same Peridot that first came to Earth or fused with Bill! She’s different than that; she’s better than that. I-isn’t that right, Steven?”

The young Gem was initially silent upon being met with this question, his indecisiveness being conveyed through his expression alone. “I-I… I really wanna believe that, Mabel…” he said sadly, averting both of the twins’ pressing gazes. “But… I just… I’m not…” He sighed, his mounting conflicting feelings towards the green Gem and her incriminating words and actions all becoming far too much to bear. “I… I just don’t know,” he finally answered truthfully. “Not anymore. I thought I did, but… I think we need to find out exactly what that thing she took from the Moon Base really was and why she grabbed it. J-just to make sure.”

Mabel let out a small, worried sigh at this, but all the same, she nodded her quiet agreement, even if she still dreaded what they might possibly find out. Dipper, on the other hand, was much more forward when it came to taking action concerning the green Gem where his sister was not. “Fair enough,” he consented evenly, though his cold expression softened as he glanced over at Mabel. “But… just in case we find something that… you—we may not like… I just… you guys know that we’ll… have to do something about it… right?”

Steven and Mabel exchanged a brief, equally despondent glance, both of them knowing this was absolutely true. If on the unthinkable chance that Peridot really was planning some underhanded scheme, it was their responsibility to put a stop to it, or at the very least inform the Gems about it. For all of the good will and camaraderie they had formed with the green Gem over the past several weeks, the thought that it could all fall apart in an instant had never really occurred to them. Until now, when it seemed as though there was a very high likelihood of that very thing happening.

On another nod of tight, terse agreement between the trio, they decided to make their move. Peridot hadn’t joined the others out near the drill, instead opting to carry on with her own, unknown devices inside the barn. It was there that the kids found her, her back turned to them as she apparently fiddled around with something, no doubt whatever she had taken from the Moon Base. She was quick to slip it away, however, the moment Steven spoke up to garnish her attention.

“Uh… Peridot?” he began, aptly apprehensive.

“Oh! Steven, Dipper, Mabel!” the green Gem gasped, startled as she spun around. “W-what are you three doing here?”

“We, uh… sorta need to talk to you, i-if that’s ok,” Mabel ventured, not making to much of an effort to hide her constant worry.

“Uh… s-sure!” Peridot agreed stiffly as she followed the kids inside of the cabin of the old, run-down truck parked inside of the barn. “Why are we in this broken-down vehicle?” the green Gem asked, genuinely confused.

“I don’t know,” Dipper said, sending her a cold, suspicious glare. “Why don’t you tell us?”

“…What?”

“Uh, a-actually,” Steven interjected as he glanced towards the hand Peridot was holding behind her back. The hand that held whatever secret she was trying her hardest to conceal from them all. “We wanted to ask you about… the Diamonds?”

“Oh!” the green Gem perked up instantly, excitement sparking in her eyes. “Well, I don’t know what the others have told you, but there’s a reason they’re in charge.”

“Oh yeah?” Dipper asked flatly, clearly not caring about this means to an end. “And why’s that?”

“Because they’re objectively better than us!” Peridot grinned brightly. “Every Gem has their own strengths and weaknesses, but not them. They’re absolutely, totally, completely flawless beings. Especially my Diamond: Yellow Diamond, the most perfect, the most reasonable, rational, efficient decider to ever exist in the universe!”

None of the kids really knew what to say concerning this, all of them knowing that Peridot’s incredibly high view of her matriarch was likely very biased. All the same, if her testimony concerning Yellow Diamond was anything, it was proof that the green Gem’s admiration for both her Homeworld and her Diamond still very much stood. “Y-you’re really loyal to her, aren’t you?” Steven asked, not masking his fledgling disappointment at this fact.

“How could I not be?” Peridot rebuffed. “We may have our little truce, but I’ll never forsake the Gem I was made for! And why would I? I mean, she’s an impeccable, impossibly wise powerhouse of a leader! E-even if she does actually happen to be in league with…”

“In league with who?” Mabel pressed, a newfound burst of hope filling her as she caught onto the smallest hint of doubt towards the Diamond filling the green Gem’s tone. But whatever that doubt might have been, Peridot was quick to shake it away in favor of her former adulation.

“O-oih, never mind, its nothing,” she scoffed with a wave of her hand. “J-just some ridiculous rumor I once heard from someone who is absolutely not a reliable source for anything. A rumor that certainly does not bear repeating, especially at the risk of my Diamond catching wind of it!”

“W-well then you better keep it down,” Steven said leadingly, seeing an opportunity and deciding to take it. “Because she’s right behind you!”

“What?!” Peridot gasped, spinning around in alarm and finally giving the young Gem a chance to swipe the crystal she was holding onto away from her. The green Gem barely even had time to react to the theft as the kids rushed out of the truck, slamming the door right in her face as she tried to scramble after them.

“Hey! What do you three think you’re doing!?” she shouted, banging on the window fiercely.

“What’s it look like?” Dipper countered just as harshly. “We’re shutting down whatever it is you had planned!”

“I-I didn’t have anything planned!” Peridot protested, though her bristling posture told otherwise. “Now let me out of here!”

“Save your strength,” Steven shook his head, holding the stolen crystal tight and close. “You’re up against one of Earth’s greatest trapping technologies: the child safety lock.”

“No!” Peridot wailed, sinking back into her seat dramatically. “How could you do this to me? The great and loveable Peridot!? I thought we were finally friends like you wanted!”

“We thought that too, Peridot…” Mabel frowned, genuinely upset. “But then…”

“But then I saw you sneak this off the Moon Base while nobody else was looking!” Steven filled in, his tone much more intense and angry than it usually was as he held the crystal up. “What is it? Tell us!”

“Hmph, its nothing special,” Peridot scowled at the trio from inside the truck. “And definitely not important at all.”

“Oh really?” Dipper asked challengingly, grabbing a hammer lying discarded on the floor as Steven readily held the crystal up to him in shared defiance towards the green Gem. “Well, if its not important, then I’m sure you wouldn’t mind if we just smash it, huh?!”

“NO!” Peridot practically shrieked before finally, sullenly relenting. “Ugh, all right, look. I have a plan. Allow me to explain. That’s a… communicator. Meant for the express purpose of contacting the Diamonds back on Homeworld.”

“What?!” Dipper asked sharply, so outraged and alarmed that he nearly brought the hammer down on the communicator right then and there until Steven pulled it away at just the right time.

“Y-you’re still trying to contact Homeworld?” the young Gem asked, horrified.

“Yes, of course I am!”

“B-but… but we thought you were finally starting to like it here on Earth!” Mabel exclaimed, desperate for proper answers where they really were none.

“Oh, you don’t get it,” Peridot countered evenly. “I’m not trying to leave, not anymore! Instead, I’ve got it all figured out. You simple clods keep trying to protect the Earth, but you can’t do anything right! I’ll admit I let myself get carried away too… laughing, singing, building our little machine… but don’t you see? None of that matters! What matters is that I can be of use to Yellow Diamond! This planet can be of use to Yellow Diamond! I must contact her, to reveal what I’ve discovered!”

“Are you actually serious right now!?” Dipper exclaimed in appalled disgust. “You said so yourself that the Diamonds were the ones who put the Cluster in the Earth in the first place! They’re the ones who want to see it destroyed now, just like they did with that whole colony plan we saw on the moon! You really think they’re gonna stop any of that now?”

“Oh, of course they will!” Peridot said, thoroughly confident in her plan. “If I could just have a chance to talk to Yellow Diamond, then I’m sure I can get her—as fair and reasonable as she’s known to be—to see that this planet could still be a viable asset to Homeworld’s empire. And what’s better is that once she sees things my way, the Cluster will certainly be shut down and the Earth saved. Isn’t that what all of you want?”

“Not like this we don’t!” Steven protested admantly. “Ugh… why do we keep sticking our necks out for you? You’re never gonna be on our side! Garnet! Amethyst! Pearl!” Upon calling out for his guardians, Steven raced off, Dipper trailing right after him so they could reveal Peridot’s heinous plan for what it truly was.

“No! Steven! Don’t get them!” Peridot shouted after them, pulling hard against the locked truck door until she happened to spot Mabel, still lingering beside it. “Mabel! You believe me, don’t you!? Then release me! Now!”

“P-Peri…” Mabel began quietly, tears of clear betrayal finally starting to well up in her eyes as she looked back at the green Gem. A Gem that, up until now, she really, truly had seen as a friend, regardless of everything she had said and done in the past. Even if that friendship had clearly meant nothing Peridot, despite her best, yet futile hopes otherwise. “Peridot,” she said firmer, wiping away her tears to regard her sternly, yet still so sadly. “I… I’m sorry…” she said as she finally turned away, even though she was the one who had nothing to appologize for.

***

A round of shocked gasps rose from the Gems the instant Steven and Dipper presented the communicator to them. Even Ford balked at it, apparently familiar with the device somehow, even as Pearl took it and frantically reaffirmed what it was.

“S-she took a direct line to the Diamonds?!” the white Gem exclaimed in horrified disbelief. “From the Moon Base?! What was she thinking?!”

“She was ‘thinking’ that she was gonna use it to call Yellow Diamond so Homeworld could just come here and pick up right where they left off with that colony plan of this!” Dipper informed hotly. “And she almost got away with it if we hadn’t stopped her just in time.”

“And its certainly a good thing that you kids did,” Ford agreed, casting a bitter glance towards the barn. “To think that we spent so much time with her, but we never saw this sort of underlying treachery coming. Honestly, I thought that I’d at the very least be used to betrayals of this scale by now. In a way, its almost disappointing that I’m not.”

“Ugh, for reals, after everything we’ve gone through, she’s still out to get us!” Amethyst growled sharply. “That’s it! I’m takin’ back all my cool nicknames for her! So long P-dot and P-diddy, hello… AUGH! I’m too mad! I’ll think of something later!”

The round of incensed reactions to Peridot’s deception continued, even as the green Gem honked the truck’s horn almost constantly from her “prison” inside of the barn. Only Steven and Mabel paid any attention to it though, their expressions awash between disappointment, morose, and frustration all at the same time. “I see she knows what a horn is now…” the young Gem noted sourly.

“I’d been meaning to teach her that one…” Mabel sighed, turning away, forlorn.

“You two offered her a lot of your trust,” Garnet noted to the pair, her hands on her hips.

“We did!” Steven huffed. “And it blew up in our faces!”

“I just… maybe we thought that… if we could be her friends then maybe she’d finally stop trying to do all of the bad things she came here to do…” Mabel said, burring the bottom of her face inside of the collar of her sweater. “But I guess she was never really our friend after all, huh?”

“No, she wasn’t…” Steven concluded, shaking his head as he looked back to Garnet. “You guys have been protecting the Earth for thousands of years. She could’ve destroyed all that. I… I don’t know why we thought we could change her mind…”

“Oh, come on, you guys, none of this is your fault and you know that,” Dipper attempted to console the pair as he stepped between them, placing a hand on each of their shoulders. “You both always try to see the best in people, and I’ll admit, sometimes I just don’t get it. But then again, maybe its because I’m not able to see things the way you two do. You both tried your best to change Peridot for the better, and in the end it just… didn’t work, but that had nothing to do with either of you. Its just… sometimes you can’t really change what people think, no matter how hard you try.”

“But that’s just it,” Steven countered with a frown. “We don’t want to tell her what to do or what to think. She should just… know, shouldn’t she?”

“Steven…” Garnet began, her tone as steady as ever, though sympathy was clearly there as well. “You always believe in everyone. Like your mother, you seem to have a little more patience than the rest of us. That’s a trait you share too, Mabel. But on the same hand, Dipper’s also right. The truth is, not everyone deserves that patience.”

“Well, look on the bright side,” Pearl cut in with as much of an encouraging smile as she could muster. “At least you got this thing away from her before she could do any real damage.”

“Yeah…” Steven and Mabel both smiled at this, glad to know that, despite Peridot’s burning betrayal, in the grand scheme of things, the Earth would stay safe. Until…

A sudden explosion rattled the entire area, its center being the barn itself as one of its sides was effectively blown clean off. Everyone turned with apt alarm to see a familiar green robot bursting out of the building, leaving a trail of clear destruction in its wake as it stormed towards them, piloted by a manically laughing green Gem all the while. “Free! Freeeeedom!” Peridot proclaimed, making an obvious beeline towards them. Or more specifically, towards the communicator they now possessed instead of her.

“What?!” Ford exclaimed, quite surprised to see that Peridot and McGucket’s robot was still functional at all.

“H-how did she escape?!” Steven asked with newfound fear over the bot bounding their way. He quickly got an answer, however, as the green Gem’s bot chucked one of the truck’s doors towards them, only barely missing the kids as it landed hard in front of them.

“Fools!” Peridot shouted triumphantly. “Your invisible rotary shield was no match for me once I applied logic!”

“Yeah! Whatever little bit of logic you actually have!” Dipper taunted back, only for Ford to narrowly pull both him and Mabel out of the way of the rest of the truck Peridot launched at them in turn.

“Now, I’m going to do this right…” Peridot grinned, prepping her bot to take on the Gems as they rushed towards her, their weapons drawn for the fray. The green Gem lashed out, wasting no time on her opponents as she quickly knocked Garnet aside. The communicator passed hands between Pearl and Amethyst a number of times, but in the midst of their frantic tossing, Peridot managed to intervene, snatching the device away just before the white Gem could nab it. “See!?” the green Gem exclaimed, hitting both of the other Gems away just as they tried to steal it back. “None of you know what you’re doing!”

With the communicator finally in her grasp again, Peridot wasted no time in making a hasty retreat in order to get it out of everyone else’s range. However, none of the others were willing to let the green Gem go through with her alarming plans so easily.

“Ohhh, ok! I’ve been ready for this!” Amethyst exclaimed angrily, quickly shapeshifting her form into a sizable, functional helicopter. “Get in!” she shouted to the others, her tone fierce enough to curb any and all comments as they all piled into her surprisingly roomy cockpit.

“Oh, of all the times for me to leave my hyper-sonic magnetic propulsion gun at home,” Ford shook his head as he made sure the twins were secure in their seats. “That would have been more than enough to take Peridot and her robot out in a single shot. Then again, Fiddleford worked on that robot and he usually built his inventions to withstand mine on purpose, so… maybe not.”

“Wait, where’s Steven?” Pearl interjected, noticing that the young Gem was the only one not seated in Amethyst’s cockpit.

“Stupid Peridot, stupid robot!” the young Gem fussed to himself from just a few feet away, still caught up in his earlier woes. “Why did I always have to go and encourage her in the first place?!”

“There’s no time for feeling horrible,” Garnet called as she shapeshifted her arm to reach Steven and pull him onto her lap. “We have to catch Peridot before she contacts Yellow Diamond.”

“That’s right,” Pearl nodded, patting Steven’s head. “You can feel horrible all you want back at the temple.”

With all of her passengers finally ready to go, Amethyst took off, her propeller speeding her onward across the farmland Peridot had already gotten a head start on. All the same, it didn’t take long for the purple Gem to catch up to the rampaging bot, which was in the midst of struggling to twist the communicator the proper way and failing completely, much to Peridot’s growing frustration.

“Grr, come on…” the green Gem growled to herself as her robot’s stubby claws fumbled with the communicator. “Work already, you insipid little-”

“Hey, Perisnot!” Amethyst taunted as she suddenly flew right by the green Gem. Peridot gasped in alarm as the purple Gem overtook her, Garnet and Pearl each launching their own attacks from her cockpit. The white Gem’s spear clipped the robot’s hull first, though the Gem leader’s launched gauntlets were what ended up actually taking the bot down. The blast was enough to knock the machine into a nearby power line, giving it enough of a zap to disable it entirely. As battered and broken as the robot was, it tumbled down the hill before its scattered pieces came to rest in the wide field below, including Peridot and the communicator she had been holding onto.

It took the green Gem a moment to pick herself up and regather her bearings after the crash, but as soon as she spotted the communicator lying in the grass just a few feet away, she didn’t hesitate to spring towards it. Right before she could reach it however, a sudden blast from above derailed her, knocking her back as she briefly glared up at its source.

“Well, I may not have hyper-sonic magnetic propulsion gun,” Ford remarked with a smirk as he spun a much smaller, simpler blaster in his grip. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t go out unprepared.”

For once, Peridot didn’t send any sort of snide remark back as she instead refocused her efforts on the communicator. At the same time, Amethyst went in low as everyone unboarded her, allowing her to resume her usual form as everyone rushed to stop the green Gem before it was too late. They all pounced on her more or less at the same time, creating an essential dogpile as they all scrambled to secure the communicator first while further destroying the robot in the process. Peridot herself only barely managed to sneak out of the wreckage, though she wasn’t as unseen as she had hoped, for only seconds later, Steven was upon her, with Mabel and Dipper following suit right after. The four of them all leapt for the fallen communicator at once, creating an uproarious struggle with no clear winners in sight.

“You’re not gonna get away with this!” Steven shouted as he tried his best to yank the communicator out of Peridot’s hands.

“Yeah!” Dipper added just as fiercely. “If you think you’re actually going to let you get in touch with Homeworld, then you’ve got another thing coming.”

“And you’ve got another thing coming if you think you can stop me, you pesky, persistent pebbles!” Peridot snapped, trying her best to kick the kids away to no avail.

“Augh! You don’t get it, do you!?” Mabel cried as she pulled hard against Peridot, finally letting her grief and frustration with the situation as a whole pour out. “We trusted you! We all trusted you! We all wanted you to change and be better than this, but you’re not!”

“We spent all that time bonding and hoping and caring about you!” Steven added amidst the ongoing struggle. “But it was all for nothing!”

“And that’s exactly your problem!” Peridot bristled as she finally pulled the communicator out of the kids’ reach. “Your emotions rule out reason! You waste all your time ‘caring’ and ‘trusting’ when you could be spending it actually doing important things like saving this pathetic planet! Which is why if none of you will, then I’ll make sure to do what must be done!”

None of the kids had a chance to counter this as the green Gem suddenly snapped the communicator on. The device’s surface instantly enveloped itself in a radiant yellow glow as it rose into the air, far out of anyone’s reach as Peridot laughed excitedly over her victory. “She’ll sort this out…” she grinned, more than ready to detail everything she had planned to her Diamond.

At the same time, the Gems rushed in, grabbing all three of the kids as the communicator continued to brighten. Everyone save for Peridot herself was quick to take cover out of sight behind the fallen robot as the communicator opened up, creating a holographic screen that flashed with the visage of four different colored diamonds. Peridot’s growing excitement grew practically manic as the telltale insignia faded away to what she hoped would be Yellow Diamond herself.

“This is the Yellow Diamond control room.” Instead of the Gem matriarch, another Gem entirely appeared on the other end of the line. Her coloration was unquestionably and appropriately yellow and her attire simple yet elegant all the same. However, what was most telling was her appearance, which was far too familiar for the kids in particular to not immediately pick up on, even from their hiding spot from afar.

“Is that… another Pearl?” Dipper asked, aptly dumbfounded.

“Ooo… she’s really fancy…” Mabel noted, somewhat impressed by her style.

“Who is she?” Steven asked Pearl herself, though the white Gem simply let out a harsh scoff at the question.

“Not all Pearls know each other, Steven,” she remarked rather curtly as the Yellow Pearl addressed Peridot.

“Who authorized you to make this call?” she asked, sending the green Gem a cold look of clear disapproval.

“N-no one,” Peridot answered stiffly, but truthfully. “B-but its an emergency!”

“That’s NO excuse to use the direct Diamond communication channel!” Yellow Pearl snapped harshly, only for another voice to cut into the conversation entirely.

“Pearl.”

Yellow Pearl flinched at this deeper, calmer tone, one that she instantly perked towards as she turned to its off-screen source. “Y-yes, my Diamond?”

“Why is there someone on the Diamond Line?”

“I-I don’t know!” Yellow Pearl exclaimed. “I was just about to tell her that-”

“I’ll take it from here.” The hologram suddenly shifted position, revealing exactly who Peridot had been hoping to speak to in the first place: Yellow Diamond.

Yellow Diamond was, simply put, absolutely radiant. Her poise and posture alone told of a figure with unspoken authority and power. Her figure was astute, elegant, yet firm and lithe, clad in a simple, stately uniform that was telling of a military leader. Her hair was short and angular, her features lovely, yet sharp and dark. In fact, just about everything about her could be summed up as sharp, from her large, pointed shoulder pads, to the shimmering stone resting on the center of her chest, to even her pupils: clear perfect diamonds resting amidst bright, vibrant golden yellow. She sat casually upon a crystalline throne, the vast expanses of space stretching out through the large windows behind her as she typed away on the countless number of holographic screens before her, sparing not even a passing glance at the Peridot who had been so bold as to contact her personally.

“Y-Yellow Diamond…” Pearl whispered fearfully, her trembling hands skimming her mouth as she tucked away behind the robot’s wreckage.

“Yellow Diamond…” Garnet echoed much more coldly, glaring towards the Gem matriarch from their unseen spot.

“Yellow Diamond…” Ford finished just as bitterly, though more to himself than anyone else as he set the depicted Diamond a personal scowl of ire all his own.

Meanwhile, Steven and Mabel exchanged a stunned, yet fearful glance, not really knowing what else to expect from the Gem matriarch based on her stern, severe appearance alone. At the same time, Dipper simply stared her down unflinchingly, knowing that despite Peridot’s foolish conviction, Yellow Diamond would likely still have every ill intent against the Earth. She was still a foe, no matter what she said or what she did and that was something that no attempt at pleading or appealing would likely ever change.

But that didn’t mean Peridot wasn’t going to try all the same. “M-My Diamond!” the green Gem saluted her leader respectfully. “Peridot, reporting in.”

“Which Peridot?” Yellow Diamond asked, her tone bored as she continued on with the work in front of her.

Peridot flinched at this, suddenly remembering something she’d largely forgotten about during her time on Earth. That she wasn’t really anything special; she was just one out of countless other Peridots, a fact that had seemed to fade into the back of her mind when she was on a planet where she was apparently one of a kind. “F-Facet 2-F-5-L, Cut 5-X-G,” she reported her designation dutifully all the same. “I’m sorry to contact you this way, but all other forms of communication have been destroyed, and-”

The green Gem starkly cut herself off as Yellow Diamond simply raised a hand to silence her, her attention turned away on one of her many data screens instead. “This says you’re behind schedule on your mission to…” She trailed off before finally turning to face her underling with a cold, calculated gaze. “How is… the Earth?”

“I-it’s… full of life,” Peridot said, with a hopeful shrug.

“Organic life…” the matriarch sneered in disgust. “And where is the Jasper I assigned you? And why aren’t you calling from the ship?”

“T-the ship was… destroyed…” Peridot admitted rather sheepishly.

“By whom?” Yellow Diamond asked, her eyes narrowing.

“I-it was destroyed by…” the green Gem trailed off, sparing a brief glance at the group hiding behind her. Her eyes briefly met Steven’s first, then Mabel’s, their expressions awash with equal fear that Peridot would rat them out to her Diamond. But instead, of all things, she didn’t. “N-no one!” she vouched, electing surprise from just about everyone in the concealed group. “There was an accident… while we were landing.”

Yellow Diamond sent a brief, disgruntled glare to her underling upon hearing this, but all the same, she was quick to return her attention back to work just as before. “I’ll inform your manager of your incompetence,” she scoffed dourly. “And what is the status of the Cluster?”

“The Cluster… w-will emerge shortly…” Peridot reported halfheartedly.

“Good,” the matriarch finally smiled in clear vindication over this fact. “We’ll finally have some use out of that miserable planet. Thank you for your report, Peridot. There will be a ship heading to your location to take you to your next assignment.”

“W-wait!” Peridot interjected hastily, anxiously. “I wouldn’t have called to waste your time with a report.”

“You already have…” Yellow Diamond scowled, though she still let the green Gem continue all the same.

“No, I-I mean… I… I wanted to…” Peridot trailed off, glancing down apprehensively. She was more than ready to divulge her ideas for preserving the Earth while also making the most efficient use of its resources for Homeworld’s benefit. And yet, just before she could, she was overwhelmed by a rather unsavory rumor she couldn’t shake, especially now as she stood before the Diamond it concerned herself. Which was why, despite the thin ice she already knew she was treading on, Peridot went off on an entirely different tangent instead. “I-I wanted to ask if…” she began, making sure to pose this question as carefully as she could. “I-if you’ve ever heard of a being who goes by the name of… Bill Cipher?”

The reaction to the demon’s name alone from both the Diamond and her Pearl was instant and telling. Yellow Pearl let out a sharp, fearful gasp as she cowered back in alarm. Yellow Diamond herself turned to fully face the green Gem, her previously icy expression instead filled with an undeniably angry sense of curiosity. Likewise, the group gathered behind the robot all carried their own startled reactions to Peridot bringing Bill up at a time like this especially, but even so, they listened carefully for whatever the Diamond might have to say about him.

“Where did you hear that name?” she asked, her burning gaze practically piercing Peridot cleanly through.

“I-I…” the green Gem hesitated, fear too afraid to fully divulge her dealings with the demon to her Diamond, so she went with a much simply explanation instead. “H-here, on Earth, m-my Diamond.”

“Hm,” the matriarch mused, her manner still largely unreadable. “And what gives you the impression that I would know of such a… ‘being’, as you put it?”

“H-he… he said you… t-that the two of you… had an… alliance?”

“What?!” Ford asked in a harsh whisper upon hearing this, the kids and the Gems all echoing his shock with startled gasps of their own.

“I-It can’t be true…” Pearl shook her head, trembling in apt terror at the very thought. “Please say it’s not…”

“Oh, did he now?” Yellow Diamond rolled her eyes, seemingly unconcerned by the green Gem possessing such knowledge. “How… amusing. Though I thought I made it quite clear to that… irksome demon that I did NOT want word of our partnership spreading to the lower ranks. But then again, listening has never been his strong suit…”

“S-so its true then?” Peridot asked, looking to her Diamond with immense, almost pleading dismay to hear the opposite. “Y-you really are working with him?”

“I fail to see how that information is of ANY concern to you,” Yellow Diamond countered as coldly as ever as she prepared to end the call right there and then. “Now, if that will be all then-”

“O-one more thing!” Peridot interrupted anxiously. Despite the effective confirmation of her Diamond working hand in hand with someone as dastardly and deceitful as Bill Cipher, the green Gem still believed she could make her matriarch see reason. Both in regards to the planet Earth and perhaps even in regards to what would no doubt be an ill-fated alliance with the dream demon unless someone helped her see the truth.

“What could it possibly be now?” Yellow Diamond asked, clearly exasperated.

“T-the reason I called…” the green Gem began, still quite nervous as she began to make her genuine appeal. “The real reason, wasn’t to give a report or to talk about Cipher. Instead, I… I believe we should terminate the Cluster!”

“…Why?” the matriarch asked, her quiet, yet icy voice and gaze sending shivers throughout the green Gem’s entire form.

“T-the organic geosystem creates resources unique to this world,” Peridot explained with rising hope that her Diamond would listen, even despite the matriarch’s clearly sullen expression. “We can’t sacrifice all that potential for one geo-weapon! I’d like to tell you some plans I came up with to utilize the planet without disrupting the local-”

“That’s enough,” Yellow Diamond cut her off swiftly and sternly. “I don’t care about ‘potential’ and ‘resources’.”

“W-what?” Peridot asked, taken aback by such a harsh rejection.

“I want my Cluster,” the matriarch said simply, succinctly. “And I want that planet to die. Just make that happen.”

“No!” Peridot protested, speaking before she could even think of what she was saying.

Now it was apparently Yellow Diamond’s turn to be taken aback, her sharp gaze focusing on the green Gem before her in a bitter, hostile glare. Her Pearl let out an appalled gasp at such a rebellion, but even so, the matriarch remained steady when dealing with it. “Are you questioning my authority?”

“I-I’m questioning your objectivity, m-my Diamond!” Peridot countered, offering her leader a quick, respectful salute. One that did nothing to quell the matriarch’s rising anger.

“Well!” Yellow Pearl huffed, shocked at such brashness. Her alarm grew even more when Yellow Diamond suddenly rose from her throne, standing at her full, massive, imposing height that towered well above the green Gem who had brazenly chosen to oppose her.

“You are out of line.”

“I-I just think-”

“I am not interested in the puny thoughts of a Peridot,” Yellow Diamond continued, ignoring Peridot’s best attempts at breaking through to her.

“But I-”

“You have disrespected this channel, and my time with your presence and you would do well to-”

“But-”

“Shut your mouth!” the matriarch snapped, finally silencing the already fearful green Gem as she continued in her outraged tirade. “You have failed at every step of your mission. Your only chance to redeem yourself is to obey this simple order: you are to leave the Cluster to grow. It will tear apart the Earth, and I will take immense satisfaction in erasing that hideous rock off of our star maps once and for all! Is that CLEAR?!”

“I won’t do it!” Peridot shouted back with every ounce of courage she had in her. She had her worries before, from the moment she learned about the matriarch’s apparent alliance with Cipher himself that her judgement was questionable. But now, after everything she’d just heard, she had no doubt; Yellow Diamond didn’t want or care about what was best for the Earth like she did. The only thing she wanted was to see it destroyed, a plan that, after all the time she had spent there, all she had come to experience and see and learn there, all of the friends she had met there, Peridot refused to let come to fruition. “I can tell you with certainty that there are things on this planet worth protecting!”

Upon hearing this, Steven and Mabel couldn’t stifle a shared smile, even while all of the others continued to watch the ongoing exchange with rising alarm. Regardless of her earlier slip-up, it seemed as though Peridot really had learned something during her time on Earth after all. Many things, in fact, and she was proudly displaying all that she had learned right here and right now for her Diamond, and for everyone else, to plainly see.

Yellow Diamond, however, was far from impressed by this callous defiance. “What do YOU know about the Earth?!” she shouted viciously, but this time, Peridot did not back down. Instead, the green Gem went in with everything she had and then some as she staked her claim and solidified what side she stood on once and for all.

“Apparently more than YOU, you… CLOD!”

As poised and calm as she had been before, Yellow Diamond’s regal manner instantly broke in raw, uncontained fury upon having such a disrespectful insult hurled at her. Her palpable outrage was more than enough to shake blind terror right back into Peridot as she quickly saluted out of habit more than anything else before hanging up the call. “P-Peridot out!” she exclaimed, grabbing the communicator and instantly ending the feed. Yellow Diamond and her Pearl disappeared from sight, though there was no question that on the other end of the line, the matriarch, wherever she was, was still absolutely fuming over the measly Peridot who had somehow worked up enough nerve to call her a clod, of all things, right to her face.

With the call over and the danger diminished, the others didn’t hesitate to emerge from hiding and head over to the green Gem’s side. Mabel and Steven were the first to embrace her in a tight, triumphant hug, both of them elated by her bravery and by the choice she had made, by all accounts, entirely on her own.

“Peridot, that was amazing!” Steven exclaimed with a delighted smile.

“Seriously, that was one of the coolest things EVER!” Mabel added, just as enthused.

“I can’t believe I just did that…” Peridot said, rather stunned by her own actions as she stared straight ahead, baffled.

“We were so wrong about being so wrong about you!” the young Gem said, more than glad to be wrong in this instance.

“I can’t believe I just did that…” Peridot repeated, still largely in a panicked daze.

“You thought you could change her mind,” Garnet said with the smallest of proud smiles.

“But Yellow D got torn down by the ‘Peri-dactyl’!” Amethyst quipped with a bright cheer.

“Uh, I know we’re all really excited about this, but don’t you guys think we should talk about the whole Bill Cipher and Yellow Diamond working together thing?” Dipper interjected with tight, anxious worry. “Because I really think we should talk about that.”

“I agree,” Ford nodded admantly, gravely. “On their own, the threat that each of them poses already can’t be understated but with Bill’s powers and Yellow Diamond’s resources combined, I don’t even want to think about what that could mean for the planet—no, the very multiverse itself!”

“Then let’s not,” Garnet said succinctly.

“W-what?” Pearl balked, confused as she shared Ford and Dipper’s understandable concern. “But Garnet, we have no idea what this heinous ‘alliance’ of theirs could mean for the Earth or for us or for-”

“There’ll be plenty of time to worry about all that later,” the Gem leader shook her head before turning back to the rather distraught green Gem. “For now, we have something to celebrate, so let’s enjoy it while it lasts.”

“Not yet we don’t…” Peridot sighed as she handed the communicator off to Pearl. “Can one of you take this?”

“Why?” Pearl asked as she took the device.

“Because it can be remotely detonated.”

A ripple of newfound alarm spread through the group at this, especially as the communicator began flashing a bright shade of yellow. “W-why didn’t you tell us that earlier?!” Dipper asked Peridot, who had simply resigned herself to lying on the ground, forlorn.

“How do we stop it?!” Pearl asked, holding the device as far away from her as possible.

“Just get rid of it!” Garnet ordered hastily.

“Amethyst, here!” the white Gem tossed it down to the purple Gem beside her.

“What am I supposed to do with it?!” she shouted frantically before Steven quickly grabbed it and securely bubbled it. Still, Garnet didn’t take any chances with it as she took said bubble and sent it flying far and high into the dawn sky with as much force as she could muster. Sure enough, the communicator exploded safely, creating nothing more than a quickly-dying firework that left nothing behind in its wake.

“Woo!” Mabel cheered excitedly. “Well, that’s one way to start a Saturday morning!”

“I’ll say…” Pearl agreed, letting out an anxious breath.

“I thought I could reason with her…” Peridot spoke up from her spot on the ground, still shaken over what she’d just done.

“Yeah, you made her really mad,” Amethyst chuckled, amused.

“And then you insulted her to her face,” Pearl added with a small smile.

“Which… was pretty amazing,” Dipper added, forcing a bit of a much-needed laugh, even despite the extenuating circumstances. “And honestly kind of hilarious. Even for you.”

”Do you know what this means, Peri?” Mabel asked with a wide, delighted smile. “We’re all best friends again! I knew you wouldn’t let us down when it really mattered and you didn’t! I’m so proud of you!”

“We all are!” Steven chimed in warmly. “And you know what else this means?”

“And I’m a traitor to my Homeworld?” Peridot asked morosely.

“Nope!” Steven’s grin widened as he embraced the green Gem once more. “You’re a Crystal Gem!”

“Whether you like it or not,” Garnet added with a wry smirk. The others all got a good laugh out of this, though Peridot herself simply let out a loud, long, mortified groan. Of all the things that could have happened, the green Gem had never once expected herself to actually become a part of the team of rouges and rebels who had stranded her on Earth to begin with. And yet, here she was, a Crystal Gem all the same, just as Garnet had said, whether she liked it or not.

And if Peridot was perfectly honest with herself, deep down, she truly did like it after all.

***

The receiving end of the Diamond Line shattered into thousands of iridescent pieces as it struck the far wall of the opulent chamber. Yellow Pearl squeaked out a gasp, trembling in fear of her Diamond’s infamous temper as she clung close to the massive throne beside her, watching as the matriarch vetted her immense fury without a single beat of hesitation.

“How DARE that insignificant little traitor try to make a fool out of ME?!” Yellow Diamond shouted hotly, her gloved hands clenched into tight fists as she paced around her spacious chamber. “Why, I haven’t seen such blatant, despicable disrespect and defiance from such a lowly Gem in thousands of years!”

“M-My Diamond?” Yellow Pearl spoke up with an unsteady, wavering smile. “I-if it’s any consolation, I don’t think you’re a clod!”

Her attempt at a consolation was, however, completely ignored as Yellow Diamond continued her uproarious monologue. “If I didn’t have much better things to do with my time, I’d go down to that disgusting speck of a world and shatter that insolent whelp myself! Fortunately though…” the matriarch finally broke into a small, dark grin, even though it was clear she was still quite unhinged in her remaining fury. “The Cluster will take care of that minor aggravation for me…”

“I-it most certainly will, my Diamond!” Yellow Pearl piped up, only to be largely looked over by her matriarch once more.

“But even so, the audacity of that pathetic Peridot is absolutely appalling!” she scoffed bitterly. “To even claim that the Earth bears us any sort of use now, after everything it cost us! Its completely absurd! I don’t even want to think of what Blue would say if she heard such a ludicrous idea! Or even worse, what White would say…”

Yellow Pearl choked out a small, frightened whimper at this, though her fear only grew tenfold as a sudden, instantly recognizable voice let out a callous chuckle right beside her. “Ha! Yellow sure is HILARIOUS when she’s ticked off, huh, Canary?”

“AH!” Yellow Pearl cried, flinching away from the dream demon floating alongside her the moment she spotted him. Her surprise was quickly replaced with aggravated frustration, however, to the point that she didn’t even notice color swiftly drain out of the throne room altogether. “Augh! You again…”

“Great to see you too, Canary!” Bill quipped as brightly as ever, patting the Pearl on her pointed hair condescendingly. “It’s been WAY too long since I’ve caught up with you and Yellow!”

“Not nearly long enough, if you ask me…” Yellow Pearl grumbled sourly, though she did breathe a small sigh of relief as the demon turned his attention away from her and to her angry matriarch instead.

“Y-ellow, Yellow!” Bill greeted cheerfully as he suddenly appeared right in front of the incensed Diamond’s face. “How’s it goin’? I’m not interrupting anything important, am I?”

“YOU!” Yellow Diamond scowled, glaring the demon down harshly. “What in the stars do you think you’re doing, going around and haphazardly divulging confidential plans and classified arrangements to the most commonplace members of my court?!”

“Why, Yellow, I have NO idea what you mean…” Bill remarked, feigning innocence.

“You know full well what I mean,” the matriarch scowled, instantly calling his bluff. “The Peridot stationed on Earth! She said you made contact with her and laid out all of the undisclosed details of our alliance without my permission. And you’re going to tell me exactly why you did this instant!”

“Yeesh, Yellow! Better simmer down over there, otherwise ya might just end up SHATTERING yourself on accident!” Bill joked with a rather mocking chuckle. “Remind you of anyone you used to know?”

Yellow Diamond let out a disgusted, appalled scoff at this, her rage growing even more as she tried to swat the demon clean out of the air on her fury alone. “How dare you even mention what happened to her in such a way, you despicable-”

“ANYWAY,” Bill interjected quickly, hovering high and calm out of the furious Diamond’s range. “I wouldn’t worry about ol’ Greenie if I we you. In case you haven’t noticed, she’s really not the brightest Gem in the case.

“You mean the Peridot?” Yellow Diamond calmed somewhat, raising an eyebrow up at the demon. “Well, I certainly can’t argue with that, given her foolish choice to rebel against me.”

“Speaking of rebels…” Bill began leadingly. “You really don’t think Greenie came up with that whole ‘let’s save the Earth’ idea on her own, do you? Especially since you sent her there to check up on the very thing that’s supposed to blow it all to oblivion in the first place? Sorta makes you think that maybe… just maybe… someone might have… inspired her to act up like that, don’t ya think?”

“…What are you saying?” Yellow Diamond asked, narrowing her eyes at the demon curiously.

“I’m saying…” Bill continued, shrinking himself down so he could take a seat on the matriarch’s shoulder pad. “That all those pesky rebels you, Blue, and White thought you got rid of way back when… aren’t as ‘gone’ as you’d like to think.”

“WHAT?!” the matriarch’s stark, stunned shout echoed throughout the chamber. “Show me! Now!”

“If you say so, Yellow…” Bill almost cheerfully complied, gliding before the Diamond and using his flat form to present images of Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl alike to her. “Not a ton of those Crystal Chumps are still kicking, but the ones that are sure are a pain in the equilateral sides, if ya know what I mean. Plus, they’ve even picked up a handful of human pals to help them out from time to time,” Bill continued, showing off each of the Pines as well. “As if they couldn’t get any MORE annoying, huh?”

“Hmph,” Yellow Diamond scoffed, seemingly unconcerned by the lot she had just seen. “A few mere straggling Off-Colors and their pathetic human pets are nothing. The Cluster will wipe them and everything else on that miserable rock out soon enough.”

“Yeah, suuuure it will,” Bill remarked with a flippant wave of his hand. “But here’s the kicker, Yellow. Take a look at who ELSE is still down there, having a GRAND old time spending the past several centuries celebrating ‘her’ victory over you-know-who…”

The matriarch gasped, her eyes wide as she noticed the image of a lone pink gemstone hovering over the demon’s open palm. A gemstone, that for all its infamy across all of Homeworld, she would have recognized anywhere. “Rose Quartz…”

“You got it!” Bill quipped, snapping the gemstone away. “Everybody’s FAVORITE Quartz is still alive and well, unlike a certain… ‘little sis’ of yours she went and wiped out of existence just to save some dumb old planet and a bunch of dumb old humans. Seems like a pretty raw deal that she got to survive when poor little Pinky didn’t… huh, Yellow?”

Yellow Diamond’s former fury was nothing compared to the absolute raw, wrath she was showing now. Her fists were so tight they were shaking, sparks of bright electricity bursting all over her form as her anger consumed her from the inside out. “A mercifully short end brought about by the Cluster is far too good for that… that shatterer…” she seethed, her voice quiet, but the fury in it as clear as day. “Cipher! I have another request for you!”

“Oh, do you now?” Bill asked, almost gleefully curious. “Well, lay it on me, Yellow! I’m sure I’d LOVE to hear it!”

“Bring me Rose Quartz before the Cluster destroys the Earth,” Yellow Diamond ordered coldly, viciously. “I want to be the one to shatter her myself, just like she shattered-” The matriarch cut herself off, her expression filling with pain that she couldn’t even bear to speak to, though she was quick to shake it away. “J-just… just bring her to me. Whatever it takes…”

“You know, normally I’d be all for that kind of hellbent revenge, Yellow,” Bill remarked calmly, casually almost. “But I think I’ve got an even BETTER idea for ya. Me and my pals have a little bit of… unfinished business to take care of down there on Earth in the not-too-far-off future. What do you say to the idea of joining us when we get down there—heck, make a whole trip of it if ya want, complete with your snazzy armada and everything!? That way, you can grind Quartzy up into a bunch of pink stardust the moment you see her, right in front of what’s left of her little army on her own doomed planet, just like ya want! What do you think? Sounds like a winner, just like ALL of my plans do, right?”

“Hm…” A small, vindictive smile filled the Diamond’s features at this. “Yes… The crushing defeat she deserves on the very planet she thought she won from us…. I do like the sound of that quite a bit…”

“So… I take it you’re in then?” Bill asked knowingly, stretching a blue, flaming hand out to seal the deal.

Yellow Diamond’s sadistic smile deepened at this, more than ready to exact the vengeance she had been craving for over 5,000 years now. “Yes, I am,” she firmly, readily agreed, returning the demon’s handshake to solidify their latest treacherous plan. “Rose Quartz’s years of running and hiding are over. Now, its her turn to face the very same fate she brought upon Pink…”

“Oh, Yellow…” Bill laughed more to himself that to the matriarch, knowing the truth that she didn’t and exactly how he could use it all to his advantage in his long, ongoing game. A game that was, by all accounts, very close to reaching its ultimate end. “You have NO idea…”

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