#there are a couple viewpoints from there of course. like 1) he could just be gay or desire sex almost at all in the og culture

[loverboyfae]

is there any version of the jekyll and hyde story that's good? lemme know

[yourdandelionofthedeathknell]

The Theraprism: Good or bad?

Ya know, i've never been sure how to feel on the Theraprism, as shown in the Book of Bill. This is in large part because we get very little info on it, from any perspective other then BIll's own at least (and he is...Not a reliable narrator). Personally, I see three possible interpretations and I don't know which one is correct. To be clear, I think all of these are fairly valid: 1. Their methods seem insipid, but are actually quite effective. They seem to have been effective in the past (one of Bill's fellow patients is slated for release in the near-future apparently), and the Axolotl (who, while not exactly rich characterization himself, has, generally, been portrayed as wise and benevolent) referred to it as "what [Bill] needs the most", which would be weird if it doesn't have SOME merit. I, myself, honestly prefer this one, because I think it works better with the narrative of the Book of Bill (a book which, generally, does not encourage the reader to sympathize with Bill's plight. Pity, maybe, but the framing is very clearly that he kinda deserves this) and the schadenfreude the reader is encouraged to feel if Bill's hellish afterlife is, largely if not entirely, a self-inflicted one: That it wouldn't be particularly bad if not for his own combo of being unable to accept that he lost, that he shouldn't be allowed to do whatever he wants whenever he wants to anyone he wants, inability to form meaningful bonds with others, and, most of all, his total inability to admit to being wrong. He COULD leave at any time, if he would just actually repent, but...He's Bill, so...He won't. It just works best for me if his hell is largely self-inflicted. 2. They are harmful, possibly deliberately. This does have a fair bit of support textually. Mandatory therapy is already a pretty major ethical grey area at best (a major tenant of modern psychotherapy is that you can't make someone change unless they take the first step), they definitely engage in toxic positivity, and, of course, the "Solitary Wellness Void" is...Solitary confinement, which is a practice most modern medical institutions oppose and consider to be psychological torture. So, fair bit of support for this. 3. This is what I think was probably Alex's intent: They're a bunch of oblivious obnoxiously happy morons (as Bill himself would probably describe them) whose attempts to treat eons-old eldritch horror bad guys with puppet shows and arts and crafts is meant to be amusingly-inept rather then actively malicious, and whose effectiveness (such as it is) is down to having literally eternity to try. Kinda like what Mabel might do to rehabilitate someone. To use an analogy, think Charlie Morningstar from Hazbin, at least in the first couple episodes, where the fact that she's treating adult criminals like misbehaving children is the joke and is meant to indicate incompetence rather than malice. I get that isn't that much different from the proceeding (except in terms of "how seriously are we supposed to take this"), but still. I think all three of these have support, and, to be clear, I go with the first one not because I think it's the most supported (might be the least), but because it jives most with how I think about BIll's narrative IE as a character we're meant to, at best, pity, but not really sympathize with. I think the intent is "Bill is suffering a karmic self-inflicted punishment after all the pain and suffering he's caused", not "Bill is being medically abused and we should feel bad for him". The Book of Bill does invite readers to sympathize with Bill occasionally, but mostly past Bill, not current Bill. All viewpoints are valid, this is just trying to organized some thoughts on the subject. I sincerely hope I haven't said anything harmful here. Uh, cards on the table, I am neurodivergent, but i've never had therapy, forcefully or otherwise (although I did have an irrational fear of the possibility of institutionalization for a bit), so i'm sorta going off vibes here, sorry to say. If I said anything insensitive here, I apologize.

[thegooseoforegon]

Amazing Digital Circus Theory

Move over Film Theory, it is time for I, the amazing Goose of Oregon, to debut my first ever theory about something with my over the top analytical skills. (no hate towards Film Theory though. You guys are great!)

The Amazing Digital Circus is an in-universe TV show, with the main cast being trapped in it by the headsets they put on. And Jax is either a hacker hired to take it down from the inside, or hired by the ADC company to be the antagonist of the show.

To clear up the TV show theory, both Jax and Bubble (and arguably Caine) acknowledge people are watching the show. Jax points to the camera multiple times, sometimes even speaking directly to the audience, while Bubble (indirectly) acknowledges in episode 3 that kids watch this like a tv show. Yes, I know that's more of a reference to the real world, but it can swing both ways (just like me, if you catch my drift) also, they have a theme song, as seen in episode 1. Just like a kid's tv show!

Obviously Caine and Bubble are Ai assistants, higher level than a regular NPC. Meanwhile, NPCs act like monsters/sidekicks of the week, not having much motivation behind them, just being there to be there. The original main cast was also made up of AI bots, but that put the ADC company under fire from lawsuits and critics, cause let's be honest, generative AI sucks. The current main cast then unknowingly got transported into the Digital Circus by putting on those headsets, in a sort of Truman Show way.

Now for Jax

Jax has either one of two roles in this world. My first theory on him is that he's a hacker, hired by a rival company to take it down from the inside, trying to derail the show plots and get ratings down. Also be a bad role model for the children who are presumably watching the show. After a couple seasons of this, the show would be shut down, and the rest of the cast would either be released or killed.

The second theory about him is that Jax was hired by the ADC company to be an anagonist. The ADC company was under fire by critics for never having a consistent protagonist, like so many shows now adays, instead sticking to villains of the week like the Gloink queen, Gummigoo and his bandits (yes, I know he's not a villain from our viewpoint, but the show was setting him up to be a sort of sympathetic anti-villain), and The Fudge, to name, well, all of them.

Both of those theories about Jax explains why he has access to everybody's rooms, knows the camera placement, (Hacker abilities or admin access), and why he's such a dick to everybody.

Here's are the problems with this theory; Abstraction and the second part of Mildenhall Manor. We'll deal with the latter first.

The second part of Mildenhall Manor is what Pomni and Kinger went through, with the angel and hunter guy. My guess is that was meant to be either a subplot/plot B for the episode, while Ragatha, Jax, and Gangle where the main plot/plot A. (We got a view more heavily centered on Kinger and Pomni, of course.) Either that, or the show was punishing Zooble for not being compliant with what they want, or trying to help them (Zooble uses they/them prounouns, right?) feel more comfortable with the show. Probably the first one, but the second one could work.

Now for Abstraction. We all know what happens, so I'm not going over that. The question is, what happens to the IRL bodies after the ADC character abstracts? My guess is they go brain-dead and die, and the ADC company gets rid of them. I don't exactly know how they explain Abstraction in the show, but we'll have to just wait and see...

[waitmyturtles]

Yesterday was an insane day, huh? I can’t wait to see what Only Friends entails -- despite my best efforts to keep cool in dis HEAT, that NeoForce snippet in the car still has me flying. Anyway, I want to pen some quick notes on Minato’s Laundromat, season 2, and note some Old GMMTV Challenge thingies, now that I’m back from this crazy summer trip!

1) I’m fully caught up on Minato’s Laundromat, season 2 -- I was three episodes behind (thanks, OGMMTVC, ha), and thanks to the eagle eyes of @emotionallychargedtowel, I am LOSING MY MIND AT THE THOUGHT OF TAKEDA KOUHEI, AKA NOZUE FROM OLD FASHION CUPCAKE, MAKING AN APPEARANCE IN ANOTHER BL, OMG OMG OMG

GASPING! GASPING!

Because Old Fashion Cupcake is my LIFE, lol. @emotionallychargedtowel and @bengiyo nail it in ECT’s post with the note on this wonderful continuation of clutch actors reappearing in Japanese BLs, like Izuka Kenta from The Novelist going to Candy Color Paradox, and Inukai Atsuhiro from Zettai BL going to Our Dining Table. I love Japan’s easter eggs in these shows. 

But also, regarding episode 5 of Minato: god, I really liked how the tables turned on Minato and Shu. It’s been interesting to have the older characters as the dominant voices of the two central relationships of this show. And of course, this second season is constructed totally around the ongoing nature of both of these relationships. So, we VERY NATURALLY see the “older voice” perspective, because it just so happens that the two older men of these couplings are the ones really setting the tone and pace of the engagements.

And the tables both begin to turn in episode 5, and I think these lines of jealousy between both Minato and Shu, for me, are frankly welcome. We can see Shin getting frustrated, Minato not having the words to respond to that frustration, and Minato just not allowing his door to open on his full feelings for Shin. The theme of this relationship being a dodgy one -- but only in the eyes of Minato! -- deserves to be challenged. And I like how this challenge is being set up in large part in the context of Shin as a student, where he would be learning how to challenge mindsets vis à vis his education anyway.

Anyway -- I utterly love this show so far. As always with the Japanese BLs that I am simping over, I wish I could give them more of my background mind time that’s being otherwise spent on Thailand, but -- soon enough!

2) Speaking of Thailand, HA -- after I published my YYY review for the Old GMMTV Challenge yesterday, I updated my list considerably. On the recommendation of @lurkingshan, @wen-kexing-apologist, and @neuroticbookworm, and because of Jojo Tichakorn’s recent tweets on the topic of what influenced Only Friends, I’ve added Gay OK Bangkok, seasons 1 and 2 to the list and started watching it last night. 

I’m already calling it — GOKB is a MUST WATCH before Only Friends. 

I can’t wait to get HUGE about this in my OGMMTVC review of this show.

Within the first five minutes, it’s already so much more open and honest about sex and queer sex than the VERY HIGH majority of BLs out there. The show is a collaboration between Jojo and Aof Noppharnach, on the lives of six gay men in Bangkok, released in 2016 and 2017 -- nicely placed between Make It Right, SOTUS, and Make It Right 2.

Obviously, I’m going backwards chronologically again, but I think GOKB will be important for understanding specifically how Asian queer male artists in this space view and portray intimacy, and language (verbal and body language) regarding sex. @lurkingshan, you were mentioning yesterday that queer male viewpoints on sex are ones that cishet women like us just may not automatically understand. INTERESTINGLY, BEFORE we talked about this -- I was actually thinking about this while I was watching the last two episodes of A Tale of Thousand Stars in my OGMMTVC rewatch. Tian and Phupha’s continued back-and-forth of frustration and miscommunication: I was thinking -- there’s GOTTA be something about the way Aof GESTATES and DISPLAYS queer male communication that I’m not getting automatically (besides, of course, the patriarchal structures that hold both Tian and Phupha back). I wonder, I think, and I feel that GOKB is going to give me hints about how Aof and Jojo just DO THIS style of communication in their subsequent shows. 

I can only hope that Only Friends will be as LOUD and OPEN and HONEST about the realities of sex and intimacy that GOKB does almost immediately in its first season. Watching GOKB feels WAY more real to life to me than a lot of the romance BLs out there. I feel like I’m talking about sex and love with my queer friends as I’m watching GOKB, and it’s just hewing to real life in an UTTERLY wonderful way. What a fucking show already, and I’m only three episodes in!

3) Finally, also on the topic of the OGMMTVC, I’ve added at least one movie, and am considering a second movie. I’m adding, per the recommendation of @bengiyo, 2007′s The Love of Siam to the list, for the fact that this movie had a clear influence on many of today’s Thai BL creators. I see it has many actors that make support or guest appearances in today’s BLs, and I can’t wait to get to it as an utterly formative piece, both to Thai BLs and to Asian queer cinema.

4) As well -- inspired in part by my notes on Fluke Teerapat in yesterday’s YYY review -- I am THINKING of adding 2014′s My Bromance to the list. I’m not sure, but I’m THINKING about it, and I KNOW I will get poked for it, ha.

A couple of things here. The OGMMTVC has not deep-dived into cinema yet, besides 2019′s Dew the Movie, which aired around the same time as the groundbreaking He’s Coming To Me. 

Yet, referring back to my conversation with @bengiyo about The Love of Siam -- queer cinema CERTAINLY speaks to the creation of the BL genre. Before television BL, what Thailand had in majority by way of queer media were movies. On paper at least, My Bromance fits a couple of bills. 

First, Love Sick premieres on television in 2014 -- but well after the cinematic release of My Bromance. So that already makes 2014 an even bigger year for the development of the BL television genre.

Second, My Bromance stars two homies who have been in these BL streets for a MINUTE -- as I said before, Fluke Teerapat is one, but I did NOT have the SLIGHTEST appreciation for how long Fluke Natouch has been around (and I’m in LUV with Fluke Natouch at the moment. I’m still not over the condo scene in UWMA!). 

So, we have the two Flukes, at least one of them publicly out, and starring in a movie ROOTED in a stepbrother yaoi trope. The comments of my Dew the Movie OGMMTVC review touched upon how taboos may have begotten taboos in early BLs -- that if a piece of art crossed one boundary in being queer, then other boundaries, like stepbrothers falling in love, may have then been seen as valid or “okay” WITHIN that piece of art. I’m interested in possibly watching something so very CLEARLY rooted in yaoi from the cinematic perspective, to engage with and better understand yaoi in developing and current Thai BL, as I haven’t done a real deep dive, analytically, into yaoi and Thailand yet. (As @lurkingshan and I talked about yesterday, TharnType on the OGMMTVC list fits the yaoi stereotypes the best.) And with both Flukes starring in MB, I wonder if I can attribute any influence this piece may have had on their subsequent work (like Fluke Natouch doing blushing maiden so incredibly well in 2019′s UWMA, and of course, the references to yaoi in Fluke Teerapat’s YYY). 

I don’t think @bengiyo has seen My Bromance, but I’m wondering if a few of the other friends from around the way have any thoughts... @absolutebl, @so-much-yet-to-learn, @twig-tea, @solitaryandwandering, @nieves-de-sugui and anyone else -- would love your thoughts if you’ve seen it and think it’s worth of inclusion on the syllabus.

These additions put some air between the next OGMMTVC chronological show in Lovely Writer, but I’ve got a lot of life stuff going on at the moment -- and I do want to give Tee Bundit and Lovely Writer the time he deserves, as I’m about over my anger on Step By Step, ha. 

That’s about it -- I have to still catch up with Tokyo In April Is..., but I’ll get to that later this week!

[arcielee]

Interview With a Writer

This is the 20th segment of my IWAW series. I will break it down into volumes, so this is the wrap of Volume 1!

Thank you so much @fan-goddess for giving me the time to respond to my questions and allowing this series to continue. 💜

As always, Interview With a Writer is my ongoing series of the talented souls on Tumblr and ao3, and their brilliant writing!

Name: fan-goddess

Story: 10 Things I Hate About You

Paring: Ettore x Female!Reader

Warnings: Non canon Ettore, warnings vary per chapter.

So, when did you start writing?

I started writing early teens for a variety of fandoms. It was all on Wattpad drafts as I’d make all these plots, but find I’d be terrible writing actual stories. The first thing I wrote for was a cringey Draco Malfoy fanfic which is on my first ever Wattpad account that still is lying about somewhere.

After a couple years though I then transitioned to Tumblr, where after joining the HOTD I started writing and enjoying it and finding my passion for it.

Where did the plot for 10 Things I Hate About You come from?

The idea mainly came from me thinking of the movie, as me and two of my friends were talking about watching it together since one of them hasn’t ever seen it.

I was thinking about the poem scene on a bus ride and was wondering about how to possibly apply it to writing, wondering who would a reader hate to love, and one of the first characters I thought of was Ettore.

Then it came to me applying different lines to him, which in the original I think had some different lines to the one that was posted, but as I was trying to post the original I accidentally deleted it. Which lead to me immediately trying to write all the lines I could remember.

It was originally supposed to be a one-shot, but thought why not when people asked for a part two. The idea to do the different view point chapter came from @flowerandblood on tumblr, since I thought of their writing style which enables the reader to see both viewpoints of the scene, and I was interested in exploring in this.

Can you explain your interpretation of Ettore? What drives him? Why is he this way in 10TIHAY?

I wanted to stay as close to the movie character as possible, and if you’ve seen the movie, there is a scene that shows Ettore attempted SA. Of course, I never wanted to write a scene like that, so I decided to write a mixture of canon him and another version of him that didn’t involve the scene from the movie.

What drives him in this story is his need for contact he doesn’t even know he needs, which he finds in the reader. He gets obsessed by it and this entire need to own her, like you would a pet really. He’s drawn on this path of her since she involuntarily makes him feel emotions he never felt before her, and he just becomes utterly addicted to it, which in the end he interprets as what could be love.

Was there anything in specific that inspired your Reader portrayal?

Not necessarily? I wanted her to have struggles. I wanted to clearly have this idea shown that no one is perfect. I don’t specify the crime the reader committed, as it’s really up to interpretation (unless someone does request a one-shot with a crime specific).

I wanted her to have that split mindset of wanting to stay like her Earth self, and the mindset of wanting to give into this desire for Ettore, who draws her in.

Plus, like Ettore, she craves this contact that makes her human and down to earth. A same need, but for different reasons.

Do you think they complement one another well?

It’s a mixed thought, really. For Ettore, it’s good they complement each other since she effectively manages to humanise him in his own way. But for reader, it’s not so good since-thanks to Ettore-she’s embracing this dark side of herself that she never would’ve never thought to connect with if she hadn’t met him.

But I don’t know if I believe that they belong together entirely, since whilst they embrace a side of each other, they also simultaneously have the ability to destroy each other. They’re a weakness to each other and only Ettore really understands could be possibly exploited, which is one of the reasons he felt so conflicted about the relationship.

Do you think you will do a sequel? Or do you have any other WIPs?

I have no plans to do a sequel. But when I finish writing/editing my Abraham series I plan to open my requests, and I am interested in doing one-shot requests expanding on this story's universe. They wouldn’t be apart of the 10TIHAY universe though, but I did have one possible request on ao3 where a person asked about what would happen if reader was the one obsessed rather than Ettore, which I am interested in possibly exploring.

Do you have a personal favorite story you'd like to share?

I have so many to be honest I doubt I can name just one! Especially since I have favourites for certain fandoms I’m in too. One of my favourites though is ‘Girl With a Pearl Earring’ by flowerandblood on Tumblr. I did photography and it inspired me both in regards to writing and in photography too.

[fincalinde]

thoughts on Su Minshan??

I actually recently did a post on SMS, so feel free to stick another token in the slot machine that is my askbox if you want. But I suppose I can build on it a little. There's one thing I brought up in there that probably does deserve more attention, and that is ...

Why, oh why, does fandom assume that SMS is unmarried when it is literally impossible that he would be single and childless? Like, this blows my mind.

Things that are clearly established by canon:

1. The jianghu operates under a clan system rather than a genre-typical pure sect system. Bloodlines are crucially important and the leadership of clans is generally passed from father to son or another close male relative, though women do rarely also obtain positions of power.

2. This system was introduced a couple of centuries earlier by Wen Mao, but is now so embedded that XXC and SL's shared vision of a merit-based sect where bloodlines are irrelevant is considered a distant and idealistic dream.

3. XXC receives numerous invitations to join clans due to his stellar reputation, and turns them all down due to this principle. He could have taken an important role in these clans but would never have been able to inherit or lead. Despite his incredible reputation, during the period of time in which he is travelling the jianghu in his pre-eye gouging days, neither he nor SL take a single disciple. This strongly indicates that even someone of literally impeccable standing couldn't even begin to get an independent merit-based sect off the ground.

... but I am supposed to believe that SMS somehow achieved this? That he left the Lan and founded his own sect with a gang of disgruntled tone deaf pals and that's the end of it? Absolutely not. He founded the Moling Su (the name itself is a big clue) in the traditional manner. He probably did involve some of his own blood relatives from the off to bulk his numbers, but even so, he's clan leader and the first thing a nascent and highly vulnerable new clan needs is heirs. SMS is absolutely married and a father to multiple children. Those children are the literal future of his clan and its very existence depends on them.

Of course his wife and children aren't explicitly mentioned by the narrative, because he's a supporting character whose function in the narrative revolves around his loyalty to JGY and his grudges against [insert list here], and his home life is irrelevant. Su-furen is either at home in Moling holding the fort; or, less likely, she's amongst the cultivators he brings to the Burial Mounds and could even potentially be intending to meet up with JGY and his cohort of loyal disciples during the collective flight to Dongying. It's just a level of detail that isn't relevant, especially to our viewpoint character, WWX, who is notoriously not detail-orientated when it comes to this kind of thing.

[smolcuriouskitten]

"God you are so annoying! You always do this!" Penny's voice rang out in the living room, Leonard huffing as he made an exaggerated motion. "Here you go again! I just said it was a bad idea for your ex to come over for friendsgiving but Im suddenly the bad guy!" He argues back, stepping closer to Penny.

"Oh thats rich, coming from the guy who slept with his coworker and I had to find out from Sheldon!"

"What the-?! Sheldon tell her that-" Leonard went to motion to his friend sitting on the couch but he left, the apartment door closing before he could finish his statement. "Not again!" They both said in unison, going back to arguing about the issue at hand.

Rockelle was knitting in her apartment, listening to Sade when she heard the yelling. She never understood how the two got together but chose not to question it. She was still single herself after all, then again so was Sheldon. Speaking of him, he should be coming down in 3...2...1..

Knock, Knock, Knock. "Rockelle." Knock, Knock, Knock. "Rockelle." Knock, Knock, Knock. "Rockelle!"

With that, she gets up from her couch, tying her silk robe tightly around her to make sure she doesnt expose herself. "Coming dear." She calls back, setting her knitting supplies on the coffee table, unlocking the door and opening it. "Everything ok? I heard-" She starts and Sheldon interrupts. "Can I hug you?" He asks and the question threw her off. Not in a bad way, no no.

Up until this point, she didnt think Sheldon was okay with people touching him. She knew of his adversity to touching so him asking surprised her. "Of...Of course you can." She stutters, opening her arms. "That didnt sound confident. Are you sure? We can-" Sheldon began to ramble and Rockelle just wrapped her arms around him.

He stopped, slowly returning the touch. "I am always up for a hug. It surprised me that you asked is all." Rockelle gently corrects, rubbing his back with a soft sigh. "You smell nice. Did you change perfumes? You usually use smells that are remnant of chocolate. You smell like coconuts now." He comments and she giggles. "Its my body wash and hair products you are smelling dear." She answers, looking up at him, watching his facial expressions.

"I do not care for change but this is one I dont mind." He replies, as she chuckles, nodding. "I will keep that in mind. Did you come down for a bit to escape the lovers quarrel for a bit? I heard them upstairs." And with that Sheldon nods, pulling back from the hug. "Yes. I dont like arguing or arguments." He answers and now the arguing could be heard from the stairwell, which Sheldon immediately ducks away into Rockelles apartment.

She waves at the two, mouthing that Sheldon was in there with her and he was okay. The pair then go back upstairs and leave Rockelle and him alone, she closes her door to see Sheldon sitting on his spot. "Their relationship is crashing and meeting an inevitable end yet they keep trying. I dont understand relationships at all, all they do is argue and talk about how much better life would be if they were apart." He scrunches his nose and she joins him after locking the door, sitting next to him.

A pause before Rockelle spoke, feeling bad that this was his viewpoint on relationships and how they work. "Well not every relationship is like that. There are some where they strive to bring each other peace and happiness. Some couples bicker but it doesnt mean they love each other any less. Think about it love, dont you and your friends argue from time to time?" She retorts and Sheldon takes a moment to think, then looks over at her. "Well my friends and I dont argue about exes or friends with benefits or even sleeping with other people behind each others back. We argue about what quantum theory is historically accurate or even which game protagonist can be a double meaning for Medieval tropes." He answers and Rockelle shakes her head.

"Thats a relationship! Its something that comes with arguments and disagreements, even if it isnt romantic. Im sorry that they argued with you there though, given how triggering it can be." She chirps and Sheldon thought about it, nodding. "I suppose it can be the same. I still think their relationship will meet a timely end at this rate." He picks up her knitting supplies and looks over at her. "Were you knitting pants before I joined you? This stitch is completely wrong, it isnt meant to be used for that. This stitch is used for blankets, quits, and other kinds of comfort items." As he inspects her tools, she chuckles and shakes her head. "Well the stitch is correct since I am making a blanket. My sister and her husband are having a little one, so I wanted to knit the baby a blanket." She winks at him and he looks over the tv.

"Well knitting isnt a task we can do together." He comments and Rockelle pauses, tilting her head. "Are you hinting at us doing something to get your mind off things?" She asks, smiling as she gets up to grab a flower Lego set. "Yes, that is what I said." He responds and Rockelle chuckles, setting the box down on the table, moving her knitting supplies to the end table on her side. "We can build this together and you can take this with you, so you have something to remember me by." She advises and Sheldon raises a brow. "Why would I forget you? I have eidetic memory so our interactions will never go forgotten." He boasts and Rockelle raises a brow with him.

"What color was I wearing when I first met you?"

"White. You wore a jogger suit with a hoodie and heels."

"What kind of chocolate do I like?"

"Dark chocolate. You hate milk chocolate due to you having an 'adult palette' in preferring the bitter aftertaste. Will there be a quiz on this?"

Rockelle was stunned in his memory and how it managed to be correct. A few confused blinks before she looked over at him with a confused expression. Here she thought his constant rambles amid their conversations meant he was ignoring her words.

"Sheldon?"

"Yes?"

"Can I give you a hug?"

"Yes but why would you give me a hug after stating umf-"

He was interrupted by the rather tight hug she gave him. Resting her head on his chest, he slowly went to reciprocate it.

"I am just happy you remembered these things about me. No one usually does. God I can kiss you right now!"

"Why dont you?"

"What?"

"What?"

@sheldoney

[darksideofthemuse]

What did you think of AkiAudreyMax's storyline in season 2? What do you think they were going for, with the way they were written in the series finale? What would have happened in a season 3? What do you wish that had happened with them? What storylines could have been explored? I really like your writing of them. Going through all of your stories right now.

Hey anon, thank you so much for your message and your kind words about my writing, it made me grin like an idiot and also reminded me I should go edit the remaining chapters in a fic I'm writing now.

My answer turned out to be very long, so the rest of my ramblings are below the cut.

Overall, when I think about Aki, Audrey and Max storyline in season 2, it just kind of makes me sad. I've read the interview with Safran saying the trio were supposed to be endgame, so that's nice to know and I think they would have got back together by end of season 3. I have no clue how the show writers would have gone about that, because personally I think they wrote themselves into a bit of a corner at the end of season 2 by leaving Audrey and Aki together. I think the writers should have broken all of them up at the end of season 2 and not just because of the pact they made, but because we spent all of season 1 watching Aki and Audrey trying to figure out why their relationship no longer works and, in the end, they realise it doesn't work, because they both want to be with Max too, that's their whole season 1 arc. So then to end season 2 with Audrey and Aki being a couple and everything is great between them is redundant and not very interesting from a viewer's perspective, and from within the story, it strengthens Max's viewpoint, that he was just something extra for them to spice up their relationship rather than an equal partner in a relationship. So, then it is much harder to write a continuation of that story, because Audrey and Aki did the one thing that Max was scared, they would do. So, I don't know how they would have earned Max's trust back in the show, but it probably would not have felt earned, because it's such a big betrayal of Max's trust. 

In general, up until the end of season 2, I liked the trio’s storyline, the exploration of their relationship and various insecurities they all had, so I was happy with it. Some of the stories could have lasted a few more episodes instead of being wrapped up neatly by the end of each episode, but I thought it made sense that Max was unhappy with Audrey and Aki by the end of the season, because it did feel sometimes like Aki and Audrey were still a unit and Max was on the outside, so when he gets angry with them and breaks up, it made sense to me. The main thing I would have changed about the end of season 2 would have been that once Max breaks up with them, Aki and Audrey decide they want to stay together and betray the pact, but then when we see them a few months later in Italy, they're unhappy, maybe snapping at each other, there’s constant tension between them that culminates in Aki and Audrey also breaking up, because they don't work as a couple, as they've learned in season 1. And then in season 3, during the next school year, they're all on their own, pinning for each other. That way Max's trust would have still been betrayed, but the fact that Aki and Audrey could not last together, would also show to Max that he was equally important in that relationship, because even though Audrey and Aki wanted to stay together, they couldn't do it without him. So, I would have liked to see something along those lines! And then of course a happy ending by the end of the show, I believe those crazy kids care about each other and could have made it work 😊

I know the show is about high-schoolers, but in ideal world I would have liked to see them older and still together, how they navigate the difficulties of a somewhat unconventional relationship as they grow older. Being in a relationship with one other person can be hard enough, so a relationship with two people can be twice as difficult sometimes! I guess that’s why I’ve written quite a bit about the trio being in college in my fic, because I’m more interested in that future aspect. It’s also been more than a decade since I’ve been a teenager, so I can remember better what it’s like being in your mid-20s!

Thanks for the ask again anon, it’s been nice to imagine what could have been on the show and ramble about them 😊  

[tetrisfinished]

ITALY 2024

okay so....we did italy! nuts right!?

we went from sep 16, 2024 to oct 2, 2024 and here was our daily breakdown of activities (it was just yasir, esi, and i).

DAY 1: Sep 16, 2024 - Mon - Toronto

this was the day of our flight; air canada direct from YYZ (toronto) to FCO (rome)

the flight was fine, totally on time, airport shenanigans were had

it was kind of a red eye, because it was at 8:15 PM departure toronto time, and we arrived in rome the following day at 10:50 AM rome time

it was a smooth-ish flight - the seat belt did not fit me so i had to ask for a belt extender and it was perhaps the worst moment of my life. but then i decided to push past it - i'm fat. that's that.

esa slept for almost 7 hours during the flight after food which was of course AMAZING - luckily we had 3 empty seats in the aisle section of the plane so he slept lengthwise on them

though i was not able to sleep - despite actually being really easily able to sleep, i kept jerking myself awake thinking esa was going to fall off the seats where he was sleeping - so that wasn't great for me lol

DAY 2: Sep 17, 2024 - Tue - Rome/Naples

we arrived in rome on time and then took the train to termini station (after getting a couple snacks at the airport)

next we missed the train from termini to naples that we had booked (the 1 PM train) and ended up on the 2:38 PM train to naples

termini is huge, and the washroom costs 1 euro to use and of course yasir had not prepared with cash or anything - luckily they accept card

we got on the high speed frecciarosa train to naples and it rained and got a bit chilly - the whole time all i could think was urgh i will never hear the end of it from yasir because i insisted that it would be good weather during our visit (PER GOOGLE, IT SHOULD BE) but he was hesitant right from the get go

when we got to naples stazionne centrale (central station) we had our first official italian meal - burger king lol

then we got a taxi to come to our b&b - napolita bonita b&b

once we got to the b&b it was about 6:30 PM so basically wasted the whole day away

yasir wanted to go out but i was exhausted (at this point i think i'd been up since toronto time 6 in the morning the previous day with VERY MINIMAL sleep in between)

so i opted to stay and basically esa and i fell asleep immediately - or at least i'd say by 7:30-8 PM at the latest

yasir ended up going out to explore the area directly outside the b&b and got a chocolate gelato for esa - though he did come in the door yelling how it was already melting and they ate it but more or less it had melted

i saw the aftermath on the towels stained brown to look like poop (to my extreme, immediate, but thankfully shortlived horror) the next time i went to the bathroom

DAY 3 - Sep 18, 2024 - Wed - Naples/Amalfi/Pompei

this day started for us at about 12:30 AM because all 3 of us "naturally" woke up - thanks again to jet lag

then we got hungry, luckily the b&b was sort of stocked with basic food choices (VERY basic) so we grabbed some milk and cookies and rusk (papay, in italy! lol crazy, right?) and packaged croissants and ate those.

we went back to sleep between 2:30-3 AM - after a lot of begging and coercing with esa since he was not super interested but we were all of course super tired :p

i woke up around 5:30 AM and took a shower and prayed fajr and got ready

woke up esa at 7 AM and got him ready quickly - he was in a great mood so that was an excellent start to my day

on this day we had pre-booked a day trip from naples > amalfi coast > pompei with stops at the limoncello factory as well as scenic viewpoint stops at sorrento and positano and on the way to pompei a stop at a viewpoint at the other side of the mountain

our pickup was at 8 AM and we got to our pickup location on time, though not having had any breakfast

we asked the driver if it was okay and we grabbed some breakfast from a nearby cafe - some coffee and croissants

then we were on our way (after one final pickup) to the amalfi coast

on the way we stopped at the limoncello factory and had some gelato and took some pictures

we also stopped at viewpoints in sorrento and positano before arriving in the amalfi coast where we grabbed a quick lunch and gelato and hung out - didn't honestly have that much time to explore but we went by the water and it was just gorgeous

then we hopped back on our tour JUST as the rain was about to begin and headed towards pompei - again with stops on the way to capture the gorgeous cities down below the mountain

then we arrived at pompei for our guided tour of the ruins and oh my goodness it is fascinating the way these ruins contained a full civilization inside them!

finally after the tour (where esa met and befriended a local stray and then asked us for a cat at home), we were on our way back to our hotel pickup spots

however, we were unable to actually be dropped off where we were picked up, thanks to "mama i need to go poopoo" lol

i'm NOT complaining - thank god, esa is telling and has been overall good with the whole potty sitch, so we got off at a major-looking roundabout where we found a little cafe/bar and asked to use their toilet

after that yasir found the hidden gem karachi chicken grill point in naples which is where we went for kabuli pulao and seekh kabab

the pulao was actually not bad - I don't know what i was expecting from desi food in italy (to be honest not great) but it actually tasted very authentic!

in any case, after dinner we walked back to the b&b; esa and i came in and showered right away, and then esa asked for "remember how we had milk and cookies last night? [we did] can we do dis again, mama?"

so of course, had to oblige and had some milk and cookies dinner in bed and then we went to sleep

DAY 4 - Sep 19, 2024 - Thu - Naples

this day was meant for just hanging out and relaxing and seeing naples by ourselves

in the morning we had breakfast at the b&b along with the other guests (one english couple and one american)

then we went out to see the city - first up was spanish quarter, but we detoured first to a miniso and then to some glasses shop

then we happened to find galleria umberto I which is a shopping centre - here esa announced he was hungry so he had a happy meal at one of the fanciest mcd's i think i'll ever come across lol

then we left and walked to the piazza plebescito and saw the palazzo reale (royal palace) and basilica reale and the two horse statues

after that we walked down via cesario console (i believe, looking at the map) and got a mint slushie (pro tip - do not do this unless you like drinking toothpaste...) and a chocolate gelato for esa which he proceed to ruin his clothes with along with his face and stroller - and didn't even finish!

then we walked back up the road and went towards basilica santa chiara

on the way we stopped back at our b&b and changed esa

then at the basilica, yasir was hesitant about purchasing tickets because he saw the church in amalfi coast and thought it would be the same

spoiler - it was not the same (he purchased the tickets, thank goodness). there was a GORGEOUS courtyard with old benches and pillars with art from I don't know even when - i didn't get wifi so i wasn't able to listen to the guided tour that came with our tickets so i was really sad about that, but overall gorgeous place!

then we walked to gino e toto sorbillo which was a tiktok famous pizza place recommendation and had a margherita and ortula (not exactly the same, but close enough) pizzas - both yasir and esa ate them and it made me so so so happy!

after we left the restaurant - where i asked yasir to take esa to the bathroom, and he did, and did not change him because esa had FULLY wet himself, we came outside and changed esa on the street (so many rolly eyes emojis)

then we walked to the funiculour so we could go up to see the sunset at castel sant elmo - we almost purchased the tickets and went in but then decided against it and walked down the road to the open viewpoint

the sunset wasn't great because it was super cloudy - but the view was gorgeous and there was a little cafe where we had a couple of sweet things and coffee, juice, warm milk for esi

we left after dark and found a cab back to the b&b just as the rain started - by the time we got back to our b&b it was a full thunder storm with lightening and the works!

during our cab ride there was some slowdown and it turns out it was because it was the miracle of san gerrano day in naples (as explained to us by the driver)

so the story goes that naples had a "patron saint" (i say this in quotes because i'm not sure if i'm recalling it correctly and also because i don't know exactly what that is...) whose blood was collected after his death. and every year a miracle occurs on the 19th of september where the blood liquifies. the residents of naples consider this a sign of good luck and well being when the blood liquifies. on occasions when it doesn't liquify, they believe terrible things will happen. the last time it did not liquify was in 2019 - and covid happened. another time prior was 1943 - and mount vesuvius erupted in 1944.

the driver explained that naples residents were an equal parts religious and luck-believing people, and he himself pointed out the irony in that lol but it was an interesting insight into the culture, so i really appreciated it!

anyway, back at the b&b, esa and i headed straight into the shower and he showered first, then i showered, and we went to bed

DAY 5 - Sep 20, 2024 - Fri - Naples/Rome

this day started with my waking up in the middle of the night (per usual) and writing out my post (this post lol) i figure during this trip i would do it as concurrently as possible because i will totally forget the details by the time the trip is over :'(

then i woke up around 7 am to go do the laundry down the road from the b&b and had a lovely chat with a gentleman traveliing with his wife from australia

after laundry i got back to the b&b around 9:20 AM and had breakfast - esa had peed in the bed and was sitting dressed up at the breakfast table not eating anything

then we got ready to check out and headed over to napoli centrale stazione

we arrived at about 11:40 AM and were able to get booked on the 12:09 PM train so we caught it just in time and headed to rome

in rome, we grabbed a quick lunch at an istanbul kebab and indian restaurant combination spot (right outside termini)

then we walked to the b&b which was walking distance, thankfully and checked in - though this took a while. all the bookings are completed by me, but my phone is off and yasir of course receives none of the confirmations....

anyway, we finally got in - the b&b is tiny and of course i'm pissed

then i needed a nap, so i slept a bit after setting up and yasir and esa went out for a few minutes

after i woke up, esa and i were hungry so we walked out and explored the area - found a park, to esa's extreme delight and stayed until maghrib

after maghrib we found a zenobia cafe right across from it and went and had dinner - syrian food

after dinner we walked back to the b&b and slept

DAY 6 - Sep 21, 2024 - Sat - Rome

the day started around 8:30 AM-ish when we went for breakfast at the b&b

we ate a big breakfast (at least i did, anyway) and i took a shower and got ready and got esa ready and yasir took a shower and got ready as well

then we went to the first attraction which was basilica de santa maria maggiore

omg when i tell you the grandeur of this church was something else - please believe that it was in fact SOMETHING ELSE.

it was actually making me irrationally irritated being there because the amount of effort and money that must have gone into making and now maintaining these buildings all in the name of religion must be astronomical - and yet in the name of the same religion and religious institutions so much bad is happening in the world.

anyway. whatever.

after we left the church, we decided to get onto a hop on hop off bus and rode it for a while

we exited the bus at piazza barberini and had lunch at that's amore

then we walked to get some gelato and were on our way to the trevi fountain where we took our pictures and admired the fountain

after that we walked to the pantheon and stood in line for about a half hour only to find out that we'd missed our opportunity and the tickets were sold out for the day

after that we walked to the spanish steps and then sat down there for a bit

then we climbed the spanish steps (first esa and yasir went alone, then the 3 of us went together) and stopped at a restaurant named novecento and had some drinks and tiramisu

after that we walked to the villa borghese stop for our hop on hop off and got on board (i managed to lose our tickets though, so that was fun 8-) but they let us on with the transaction in my apple wallet

the bus we got on was the last one for the day and we exited the bus at termini

after exiting we walked to the same place we had dinner at the day before - ristorante zenobia and ordered the makloubeh and shish tawouk and ate

after that we walked back to the b&b, all 3 of us showered, and went to bed!

DAY 7 - Sep 22, 2024 - Sun - Rome

this day was nuts! at the end of the day, my phone clocked a total of 19,446 steps!

we had colosseum/palatine hill/roman forum tickets for this day

our reservation was for 9:45 AM and we left the b&b pretty much immediately after breakfast

we walked to the colosseum (yes, walked, because that's how close it was to our b&b) and got in

the structure and history of this monument is just....beyond words! we spent a couple hours there and then we walked to palatine hill and saw all the MANY things to see there including but not limited to:

colosseum arch of constantine temple of venus and rome arch of titus palatine basilica of maxentius roman forum farnese gardens house of augustus ninfeo deggli specchi ninfeo della pioggia

then we exited through the roman forum out to via de fori imperiale and the road was closed and full of people and buskers - there were break dancers, humans dressed as statues, people in giant bear and panda costumes, and my PERSONAL favourite - the pianist whose music rang through the square

right across the roman forum are the follwing attractions that we saw as well:

foro traiano colonna traiana imperial fora le colonnacce

from there we walked to the altaire della patria and yasir convinced me to climb up to the top of this MASSIVE BUILDING where they had a little square - so i did, and oh boy am i glad i did! it was soooooo beautiful!

next, we had a few snacks at the cafe there and yasir and esa went to the bathroom, which was on the ground floor of this monster building so he had to go down and come back up once again! (not to mention that he went down and came back up the first time too, because he went alone at first before convincing me to come up with him)

then we had our snacks and yasir decided we should go up by elevator to their terrance - this was right around sunset

that had to be one of the hands down most beautiful city scapes i've ever seen in my life - and that too at golden hour!

anyway, that was of course the moment that esa needed to poop so yasir and esa went down again and i stayed behind because i just couldn't leave that sunset

then, of course, the attraction closed and both mine and yasir's phones died lol

soooo ya, anyway as it closed, i went down along with everyone else and there were yasir and esa right at the bottom trying to get up to find me

next we walked over to the ara coeli staircase - or i should say yasir did, i chose to sit at the bottom

and when he got back, we hung out at the bottom of the stairs figuring out what to do

we decided to try and get a cab back to the b&b but none of the cabs stopped for us, so we sort of kept walking along

then finally we figured we wouldn't be able to do anything without charging our phones so we stopped in at an irish pub and charged our phones and ate some food

then we decided to walk it back to the b&b - where esa slept almost immediately, i showered, and then i slept

DAY 8 - Sep 23, 2024 - Mon - Rome/Vatican

on this day we had booked our tickets for the vatican museums and sistine chapel

we woke up in the morning and were fairly relaxed about getting there because our tickets were for a guided tour at 11:30 AM

we had breakfast at the b&b and then got ready to go, but by the time we left it was already past 10:30 AM and then we were not able to find any cabs and got stuck waiting on a hop on hop off bus instead

so that's what we did

except like 3 buses arrived at the stop completely full before we were finally able to get onto one

and then the bus stopped at the vatican city, except it's a fair way away from the actual vatican where it stops so it was a long walk fr us to get ot the musem

luckily we had tickets so we could skip the line, but by the time we finally made it to the front to enter it was 1:30 PM...

when the entrance person first scanned our ticket it sounded a big beep - and he looked and realized we were late

luckily, we were still able to enter, however it was just going to be a self directed tour instead of a guided one

such is life, so we started goiing through it, until we got through to the seond or third museum when esa had an accident and then i rushed him through all the remainder of the museums (if i'm recalling correctly, there are 13 in total and the ending exhibit is sistine chapel) to get to the toilets which are after the san rafaello museum

of course esa had to be changed and i was upset at him - this was kind of the shitty part of the trip

but afterwards we walked ahead and got to the sistine chapel

after the sistine chapel we stopped and had a light bite to eat and then were on our way to st. peter's basilica where we decided we wanted to go in

there was a fairly long line up for that, however it was free and the line moved fairly quickly

and once we got literally to the front door of the basilica, like clockwork once again, esa needed to pee

and of course there were no toilets until you exited, so i did and then i ran with esa to the toilet where OF COURSE there was a long ass line for the women's room and almost no line for the men's

so i took esa and stood outside the men's room area (luckily there were no doors to the overall bathroom)

and directed him to go pee and find a toilet (which he at first could not find) and then when he did he almost forgot to close the door

and then at the end when he needed to wash his hands, he couldn't figure it out but thank GOD, one of the men in the washroom saw us. he had literally been done and LEFT but then CAME BACK to help esa with washing his hands and if that's not a miracle, I don't know what fucking is.

anyway, once we got out, we decided to get back into the line and try again

this time we were able to get in and see the basilica, but the st peter's grottoes had jUST closed for the day so we missed those - ah wells

and when we got out we spent some more time at the square and finally decided it was time to go back

i was in no mood to do a 30 minute walk at sunset back to the b&b so despite that there was no taxi that showed up, i booked an uber black

then we got back and yasir decided again that he wanted to have a desi dinner so we walked around termini area (close to our b&b) to have desi food

after dinner we walked back to the b&b and i think i didn't even shower that night because i was exhausted

and we went to sleep

oh also, the night before esa had had an accident in bed, the b&b hadn't even replaced the sheets so esa and yasir slept together on the single bed while i slept on the very corner of my side of the double

rome's b&b was my least favourite and i definitely regret not pushing for spending more money on the stays there - though yasir believes it was all good, and no big deal - he isn't correct.

DAY 9 - Sep 24, 2024 - Tue - Rome/Florence

on this day we started off with breakfast at the b&b and then we packed up and checked out officially, but left our baggage there to go and explore some more

we walked around the area and explored a little bit and i got a matte privacy screen protector for my phone, which i really enjoy

esa also made a purchase of his red sunglasses that day - when he bought them he asked to call khala and minnu to show them his purchase lol but obviously it was too early in canada so we couldn't do that

and then later on decided he wanted a phone case (thinking it was a phone) from the store that i purchased my screen protector from and then insisted on "turn my gasshess to get the phone" (read: return my glasses to get the phone) l o l so that was a fun ride

after we'd finished exploring, we went back to the b&b, got our luggage and went to termini to catch our train to florence

at termini of course we (esa and i) were left waiting while yasir bs'ed around the ticket booths to get our seats - 5 cities, and 5 inter-city train rides and yasir never got it through his thick fucking head that you can do that ahead of time and save yourself a lot of trouble

but ANYWAY, on the train, esa and yasir went to the dining cart and esa smugly brought back a box of popcorn for himself - i have the cutest video of them coming back and urgh my kid is adorkable (mashallah)

we arrived at the florence b&b at around 5:30-ish PM and checked in - this one was MUCH nicer than rome's so we breathed a major sigh of relief

and then we walked around to go find some dinner, which of course ended up being some shawarma at the local shawarma place lol

then we walked around some more and then came back to the b&b after it had gotten dark to sleep

DAY 10 - Sep 25, 2024 - Wed - Florence

on this day we got up, had breakfast, got ready and began our exploratiojn of florence

we started off at the officina profuma-farmaceutica santa maria novella - the (self proclaimed) oldest pharmacy in the world dating back to 1221

i posted it in my instagram stories and one of my friends pointed out (rightfully so) that it is of course self proclaimed because pharmacies and medicinal practices and perfumeries existed in the "brown" world long beforr this time, but as per the colonial habit - they love to claim they're the first to do everything lol

anyway, over here i got my souvenirs for mama and javaria - rose water toner

then we grabbed a cappuccino and a cookie for esa and yasir and i and walked to the basilica santa maria novella in the piazza santa maria novella and walked around in the church and the gardens behind it for a while

then we grabbed lunch at a restaurant in the piazza (pizza and risotto - neither of which yasir liked so that was lovely)

after that we walked ahead to the dumo firenze and stood in line to get in there

while in line we enjoyed a gelato, which was lovely

after the duomo, we walked around a bit and as i was guiding us to our next stop i noticed on the map there was something labeled merry go round; i searched for it in the area and got directions and lo and behold found ourselves at piazza della republica where there was indeed a merry go round

so we got on and took a couple spins on the merry go round, which esa of course enjoyed so i loved it too

it was a pretty cool piazza too, so i was very happy to spend time there

after the piazza, we walked through and found ourselves at one of the many local leather mercatos (marketplaces) in florence and we walked through there

esa immediately found a shark shaped keychain which yasir of course did not buy him because this was the moment yasir chose to try and parent his kid (rolling my eyez 4 DAYZ)

anyway, after walking around the mercato we continued forward to the literal castle called palazzo vecchio in the piazza della signora

we walked through inside to the part that was open to the general public, noticed the terrace tickets were sold out, and walked out and of course this was the moment i ran out of storage on my phone

and general phone battery dying problems had begun

so we decided to take a quick pause and sat down at a cafe in the same piazza - the gucci cafe lol

here we charged our phones, i deleted whatever i could to try and make more space on my phone, and then i went back to the castle quickly to take the pictures i missed :'(

after this we walked over to basilica di santa croce in piazza de santa croce which was actually something yasir had added to the itinerary

unfortunately, when we got there it was already closed so we mostly just looked around outside of it

then we walked to the school of leather which is a functioning and open school where leather goods are produced to this date

here i purchased javaria's cross body bag and ahsan's belt - leather items, for her birthday and his souvenir

after that we kept on walking - in all honesty, i was in the mood to just go back to the b&b but yasir wanted to keep walking so we did and when we did we eventually found ourselves at the river in florence called river amo

we walked along the river around sunset and crossed to the other side and then we stopped for dinner - yasir had declared earlier that he was in the mood for something "chatpatta" and lo and behold we found a pakistani restaurant that night

biryani and daal and malai koftay and naan were had and oh man i gotta say that was some ELITE level biryani in florence that night

after dinner, it was dark and rained for a bit so it was obviously time to go back to the b&b - but not before passing by ponte vecchio in florence, which is a famous bridge with restaurants and only a walking path along it

yasir figured out the bus route that would take us back so we hopped on a bus and went back to the b&b and slept

this was perhaps my absolute favourite day in the whole of the italy trip and probably also the reason that florence has been my favourite city hands DOWN

DAY 11 - Sep 26, 2025 - Thu - Florence/Pisa/San Gimignano/Siena

on this day we woke up bright and early and made our way to the florence train station where we were being picked up by the tour group that we'd signed up with

at the train station we got some food and then we were picked up by our tour group and walked to the coach bus to begin our tour

the first leg of the tour was an hour-ish long ride to pisa, where we stopped and saw the leaning tower of pisa and had some quick fries

then we got back on the bus to go to a local winery and had the most bland meal i've perhaps ever had along with a wine tasting that of course we did not take part in lol

at the winery after lunch we enjoyed the gorgeous views of the italian (tuscan) countryside and also there was a cat on the property that esa and i played with for a few minutes

after lunch we got back on the bus to go to a place called san gimignano which was my favourite stop of the day

it's an old town that was maintained from way back when and it's just so gorgeous with some amazing views

at the end of the hour or so there, yasir took esa to the bathroom and asked for me to get him a gelato - i got 3 cones and it was such a windy day they all literally flew from the cone in droplets onto my dress because it took esa and yasir FOREVER in the bathroom lol

anyway, we came back to the bus and were on our way to the world unesco heritage site of siena, where we were supposed to have a guided tour

i gave up my spot on the guided tour because i thought esa was getting fairly tired and hungry, so the two of us just went to a cafe and had some gelato while yasir did the tour

then we went back to the main square which was the meetup spot and back on the bus and back to the b&b

DAY 12 - Sep 27, 2025 - Fri - Florence/Milan

on this day we woke up at the b&b, did our packing

i took a quick shower in the morning - which i'm only mentioning because i want to memorialize this esa-story here; prior to my shower, yasir quickly went to the washroom to wash his hands. after he was done, there was not a towel immediately available so he sort of shook his hands and of course the water droplets from his hands fell to the floor. while esa was still fully in earshot, i gave yasir some sass in the sarcastic form of: "great, why don't you wet the whole floor so i slip and die?". esa immediately yelled "I DON'T WANT YOU TO DIE, MAMA!" and of course i realized what i'd done so i told him it's totally okay, i'm not going to die yet and i was just joking. and then went into the shower lol

i was maybe 4 minutes in the shower when i heard knocking on the door so i called out to ask who it was - it was my little widdle baby boy asking: "mama have you died?" sigh

of course i respnded by saying no, baby i haven't

another couple of minutes later he just walked right in to the bathroom to confirm that i had in fact, not died.

and the final piece of this "occasional" trauma - let's call it that - that presented itself was later that morning when esa needed to go pee himself, but when he got to the toilet, he got scared and told his abba (who had taken him) that he didn't want to die....

my poor baby, i am so sad and remorseful and even a bit ashamed of what i said and who knows what level of anxiety he faced this morning...but almost more than that (though bad on me, again) i'm amazed that my 4 year old has the depth of understanding that he does about death....that frankly scared me a little bit....

anyway, that was the whole story. after getting breakfast, we came back to our room and got ready - i had already completed my packing beforehand but yasir was still not done so he finished up and then we checked out and went to the train station where we waited another two hours before our scheduled train to milan

the remainder of this day i'm going to title - yasir is the fucking worst sometimes.

when we got to the b&b at milan (took a cab from the train station), we came in and yasir immediately went on his phone

the day before, something kind of big happened which was yasir's bank account was closed because he did a transaction here in italy and it got dinged as suspicious activity so yasir was (i suppose, rightfully so) stressed about this

but when we got into the b&b, tired, and hungry, and knowing that we had laundry to get done almost immediately AND knowing that i had started my period and needed pads - yasir chose to spend an hour and a half on his phone just trying to figure out what happened

i understand the gravity of the situation - but FUCKING COME ON, man you could have done that AFTER dinner and putting esa to sleep could you not!?

then finally we left, literally 10 minutes before the nearest laundromat was supposed to close and turns out they didn't offer next day service

and by then esa had started saying he was hungry

so carrying all the laundry in esa's stroller, i decided we could go to the burger place and grab some food first because my baby was tired and hungry

but that place was closed

i would have gone to literally any other of the multiple open cafes in the area just to get a really quick bite into esa and walk back

but yasir instead chose this moment in time to ask a rando on the street about where to find good desi food and then proceeded to take us to this place via tram (as opposed to sitting a 4 minute walk away from where we were staying....) to get his goddamn fucking mutton biryani

this, after he yelled at me for only ever caring about food - after i yelled at him for literally wasting our time this evening

so we went and ate and came back and i put esa to sleep while of course yasir fucked off again to get his water bottles for his daily metamucil intake - fuck me amirite?

and then when he got back and after esa was finally asleep, i left around 9:10-ish PM to the closest self serve laundromat in the area and did my laundry for the next couple of hours

uber'ed there and uber'ed back for ridiculous fares, but thank goodness that the laundry was done - i wasn't able to get my pads, though because i had needed to pee really badly but such is life

when i got back, yasir had slept with esa and i pulled out the sofa bed and slept there

DAY 13 - Sep 28, 2024 - Sat - Milan

on this day we woke up and i had already picked a place that i wanted to get breakfast from - it was called mugs & co

we went and luckily were able to get a table there (i say luckily because it was full and they were asking for reservations for all the other folks that came)

it took a few tries to get our order correct, but we got breakfast and then went on our way to the duomo

before we got there, we stopped by a church where a wedding was happening and esa somehow managed to find a shark bracelet (baby shark merch) which he insisted on purchasing (successfully)

when we got to the duomo, the tickets were sold out for terrace, so instead yasir purchased the skip the line tickets for entry and we went in to see

after that we went to the galleria vittorio emanuele ii and walked around for a bit

then we grabbed some lunch and a bathroom break at the local mcdonald's - i mention bathroom break because i needed to go, and there was a long line up. and as we got to the front of the line we realized that this HUGE mcd's right across from duomo milano had only F O U R toilets (i'm speaking re: women's bathroom, can't say what the men's was like) of which 1 was out of order and 1 stall literally did not have a DOOR on it. a lady behind me chose to go into the men's bathroom because she couldn't wait and another lady behind me chose to go into the stall without a door because she couldn't wait - overall pretty terrible situation.

anyway, after that, we decided to take the hop on hop off bus through milan and rode it for a full loop to see and hear about the interesting places

and after the hop on hop off we decided to try and go to the sforzesco castle - but on the way we stopped for gelato and realized it was getting late, so we instead decided to come back to the b&b

we came back to the b&b and grabbed dinner at a doner/shawarma place on the way, where esi had some falafel for the first time ever

then quickly before heading back to the b&b i went and grabbed some eggs and bread so the following 2 mornings we could just have breakfast at the b&b (this location was basically a full apartment) and then we got back and went to bed

DAY 14 - Sep 29, 2024 - Sun - Milan

the next morning we woke up, had breakfast, i took a shower and got dressed and we headed out the door in the afternoon (we really had a super chill sunday morning)

first we stopped at the mubo museum right near our b&b because the building looked kind of cool and esa played on the chalkboard for a little while

then we kept walking at a leisurely pace down through the city towards our destination - the sforzesco castle/sempione park - when i say leisurely i mean we took many stops to walk around various areas and see the buildings because it was a really chill day for us

before getting to duomo, we also had lunch at this place called roadhouse (looked like a jack-astors-esque chain) where yasir accidentally ordered beef tartare thinking it was steak lol

then we took the hop on hop off again because our previous day's ticket was still valid and again took a full loop back to the duomo - the reason for taking it was to see if we could get closer to the castle via the bus but it really didn't do much to help us get closer so we got back off at duomo and walked over

after walking through the castle and sempione park, we decided it was time to get back to the b&b

DAY 15 - Sep 30, 2024 - Mon - Milan/Venice

the next morning we woke up, packed our stuff, had breakfast, and checked out of the b&b and took a taxi back to milan central train station

while yasir dealt with getting our seats (yet AGAIN at the goddamn last minute), esa and i sat and ate at mcdonald's

then we finally got on our train to go to venice and arrived there around 3:00 PM-ish and made our way to the b&b

we had a hard time getting to the b&b because yasir is shit at following google maps directions or reading messages and then when we got in it was kind of overwhelming and i had an altercation with the b&b owner over the phone - in which he straight up yelled at me...

anyway, whatever that story for another time (it does have a happy conclusion, so happy to report on that for now)

after we settled in, we went outside to walk around and explore for a bit and then we came back to the b&b and slept

DAY 16 - Oct 1, 2024 - Tue - Venice

the next morning we woke up and had breakfast on the terrace in the b&b which was lovely (and would have been excellent if it wasn't for the mosquitoes)

we also chatted with the other guests there who had come from australia, whom yasir told that our whole trip had been planned meticulously by chatGPT and completely dismissed all of my effort...lol so that was fun

then we got ready and headed out to explore the area

first we stopped at a nearby church where an artistic exhibition was being hosted - the name of the exhibit was "another one bites the dust" and it was by an artist named yu hong held at the Chiesetta della Misericordia

after that, we walked through the streets of venice and went to the liberia acqua alta - i had seen on tiktok that this super old bookstore had a gondola you could just go and sit in and take pictures in at the back, though unfortunately this was not the case

after i took a quick stroll through the bookstore, we were on our way again to fondamenta nuove (9) to catch the boat to the islands of murano and burano

we got on the boat and stopped at burano where we walked through the super colourful houses and had lunch and then gelato

after that we went back on the boat to get to murano, though we only really got off the boat in murano to get esa to the bathroom

burano is known for it's local lacemaking and murano is known for it's local glass blowing

after murano we got back to venice and headed to the rialto bridge - which is a main attraction in venice

after rialto, yasir was feeling a bit out of energy so we went to grab a quick coffee and phone charge at a local cafe

once we were done there we went to saint marks' square and then back to rialto

after that we had dinner at a local shawarma place and then esa insisted on having gelato and then we went back to the b&b and slept

DAY 17 - Oct 2, 2024 - Wed - Venice/Toronto

this was our last morning - we needed to get to the airport so i had woken up much earlier to finish up my packing and shower

then we got ready, didn't have breakfast and made our way to the closest boat station to get a water boat to the airport in venice

then we got to the airport and ate some food after check in, baggage line, customs, etc and boarded

at the very last minute while we were going into the aircraft i thought i'd lost my phone so i ran out and tried looking for it - turns out it was in my backpack all along

then we flew back home to canada and went to mama and baba's for a few hours

at night, we got back in the car and came home - that was such a treacherous drive because it started off okay but the neend ke jhonkay i experienced during it were w i l d

but anyway, shukar alhumdullilah we made it home around midnight and that was the end of our trip to ITALY 2024 :)

[notafunkiller]

Hi,

Thank you so much! I really appreciate it and enjoy reading your messages too🤍

Absolutely, I couldn't have said it better myself! It's really perplexing how some fans seem to prioritize scrutinizing his personal life, particularly his “girlfriends” social media activity, over celebrating his professional accomplishments. It's important to remember that being a fan means appreciating an artist's work and respecting their personal boundaries. I find it quite heartwarming that we share this viewpoint. Sebastian's incredible talent and the meaningful impact of his work should be in the focus.

“He is private but affectionate. Also, secret ≠ private. “

I couldn't agree more! Sebastian strikes me as someone who values his privacy while still being capable of genuine affection. It's crucial to recognize the distinction between keeping certain aspects of one's life private and being closed off entirely. I genuinely hope that Sebastian finds someone who understands and appreciates this balance, someone who respects his need for privacy while also sharing his warmth and affection.

I also liked the chemistry Daisy and Sebastian had and think they would fit together quite well. I just took a woman outside of the industry as an example because it would give Sebastian the chance to have a completely new experience and it might benefit his private life, to have someone who enjoys a simple and quiet life and who doesn’t know anything else outside of it. Of course, there are women in the industry who are like this too; I just thought it would be a nice and welcoming change in his life.

And also because from what I saw and heard, Daisy is in a relationship, I didn’t want to sound disrespectful by saying that they could make a sweet couple, because she seems quite happy and that makes me glad for her. Personally, I find her to be one of the most humble actresses who is genuinely talented.

“He truly needs grounding, stability, and a contrast to the industry's chaos, especially since he said himself his career is his number 1 priority (which is normal, especially since he sacrificed so much for it + his mom, too & I believe he'd always sacrifice everything for it and I super respect and appreciate it)... even recently”

Absolutely, you've hit the nail on the head. Given Sebastian's dedication to his career and the demanding nature of the industry, having someone who can provide grounding, stability, and a reprieve from the chaos is paramount. It's evident that his career holds immense importance to him, and finding someone who not only respects but also supports his ambitions is crucial. I admire his commitment and truly hope he finds that balance he so deserves.

I just want to express my sincere gratitude for the wonderful conversations we've had till now. Your openness to discuss this topic in such a normal and respectful manner are truly incredible. It's been a pleasure engaging with you, and I'm genuinely glad that we can have these lovely exchanges and I hope more are to come. I appreciate the opportunity to share thoughts and perspectives with you. Thank you for making our interactions so enriching and enjoyable!🥰

Hellooo

It's really perplexing how some fans seem to prioritize scrutinizing his personal life, particularly his “girlfriends” social media activity, over celebrating his professional accomplishments. It's important to remember that being a fan means appreciating an artist's work and respecting their personal boundaries. I find it quite heartwarming that we share this viewpoint.

I find it heartwarming too🌸

And also because from what I saw and heard, Daisy is in a relationship, I didn’t want to sound disrespectful by saying that they could make a sweet couple, because she seems quite happy and that makes me glad for her. Personally, I find her to be one of the most humble actresses who is genuinely talented.

About this... from the last couple of the photos I saw (the last three times they were seen together), Daisy seems in a PR relationship to me. There are some pic I find so ??? I got such off vibes. I really was excited for her at the beginning🥲

And yes! She is so humble, and nice, and genuine. She is awkward on the red carpet and doesn't pretend to be different.

It's evident that his career holds immense importance to him, and finding someone who not only respects but also supports his ambitions is crucial. I admire his commitment and truly hope he finds that balance he so deserves.

I totally agree with everything you said in general, especially with this.

And I also want to thank you for being so nice and open to come here and share your honest opinions in such a respectful way! You are absolutely always welcome and please don't hesitate to reach out.

[jovialkingdomfan]

How the 10 Worst fast Fails of All Time Could Have Been Prevented

Saskia Howard-Clarke is usually a “promotions Female” from London. She was the fifth evictee through the Large Brother house on July 1 2005 when she participated while in the sixth number of the favored television programme.

In the 1st few weeks, Saskia proved to become well-liked with housemates and viewers alike. This was evident in 7 days two when all the housemates were place up for eviction by means of a general public vote as a result of rule breaking because when Saskia’s title was introduced, the Reside studio viewers cheered her.

Even so, events took a flip with the worse points took a Completely wrong flip when a divide in your house occurred and two customers of her team, Anthony and Maxwell had been banned from nominations – leaving Saskia within the vulnerable posture of being nominated by the opposite team who sided with Makosi Musambasi after a heated confrontation among the pair.

A lot of the opinions Saskia made in her argument with Makosi sparked a debate about racism becoming a factor in the home and the two Maxwell and Saskia ended up place up for the general public vote. Saskia was evicted by a greater Hop over to this website part 71% on the vote and greeted the gang to the mixed reception on Working day 36. She obtained the highest percentage of any eviction vote in the full sequence.

In her write-up-eviction interview, she later on denied the make a difference by stating she was a quarter-Sri Lankan, an announcement that did not justify or alter the viewpoints of many viewers.

This was Saskias nomination history in the course of her remain in the massive Brother residence:

1st (Working day five) – Saskia was nominated by Derek and Mary.

2nd (Working day 11) – Saskia was nominated by Craig, Derek, Lesley and Vanessa.

third (Working day eighteen) – Saskia was nominated by Science only.

4th (Day twenty five) – Saskia obtained no nominations.

fifth (Day 32) Saskia was nominated by Derek, Kemal, Makosi and Vanessa and was evicted by using the general public vote.

All through her time in the large Brother house Saskia coined phrases which include “conclusion of” and “it’s Pet take in Pet” although she didn’t last as well extended and was evicted fifth when she as well as the oafish Maxwell ended up both of those nominated.

Even just before her stint on Huge Brother, Saskia enjoyed dating “famous” folks and previous boyfriends have integrated an Olympic swimmer, a Premiership footballer and he or she also dropped down a couple of divisions to hook up with Nottingham Forest striker Adam Nowland.

Saskia statements to go to the gym 5 occasions every week, she will get her nails carried out each month and is particularly obsessed by faux tans.

Since leaving the home Saskia has been hectic touring grotty nightclubs in a very double act with Maxwell although also posing for glamour pictures in lads mags to be sure she remains in the public eye.

[thegradus2]

If you feel comfortable sharing, could you list the >10 obscure isekais you are currently obsessed with?

Yes of course!! With explanations and all!!!!! (Note: i am treating a series as “obscure” when i have 0 friends to talk abt any of them wiht :,) some of these are probably actually populair and im just not aware lol)

1. Lout of the counts family

I want og cale henituse biblically spiritually. i decided i want to get top surgery bc of this series. I am mentally unwell over this man. I would love this man if he was a worm. Literally changed every single pfp i have on anything to this man. I HAVE BEEN RANTING ABOUT THIS MAN FOR A MONTH NOW. MY FRIENDS ARE MAKING FUN OF ME ITS THAT BAD

2. Villains are destined to die

Love my girl penelope! I think her paranoia and the way she interacts with some charas is a little frustrating sometimes but i understand it at the same time, her situation is so scary and she doesnt know everything thats going on 🙏 i wanna go clubbing with her and let her have a moment to just have fun without any worries!!!!! I also like iklies i genuinely think hes just a mentally unstable 17 y old, a very therapy heavy 3 month plan could help him a lot

3. Mobuseka

Classic trash isekai anime but with the twist of it being very funny so i love this series anyway!!!!! Like this guy isnt winning by being kind hes just actively cheating his way through life, beating up nobles with shovels and just being a giant dick. I love this guy 10/10

4. The one with the vending machine

This one isnt obscure at all but i still wanna mention the anime where the guy is so obsessed with vending machines that he dies saving a vending machine from falling off a cliff. And then he wakes up in a fantasy world as a vending machine.

5. I’ve become the heroes rival

THIS SERIES HAD ME ACTUALLY LIKING A STRAIGHT COUPLE. LIKE OF COURSE I WOULDVE PREFERRED THE LESBIANS BUT MAN. THE STRAIGHT COUPLE WAS PRETTY ROMANTIC NGL.

6. I favor the villainess

AGAIN NOT VERY OBSCURE SINCE ITS GETTING ANIMATED BUT THIS IS LITERALLY WHAT I WISH EVERY OTHER ISEKAI MANGA/ANIME OUT THERE WAS I LOVE THEM I LOVE HOMOSEXUALITY

7. The way to protect the female leads older brother

This one is pretty dark compared to the rest on this list but roxana is SO smart and her and her mans are so ❤️❤️❤️ together i hope neither of them dies :,)

8. Beware of the villainess

I LOVE MELISSA NINE AND YURI SO MUCH!!! CARTENA AND BOBBY ARE SO ADORABLE TOGETHER!!! I LOVE HOW MELISSA DOESNT GIVE IN WITH ANY OF THE TERRIBLE MEN AND SHE IS SUCH A GIRLS GIRL!!!!!! MELISSA YOU ARE A ROLE MODEL

9. Omniscient readers viewpoint

Again. Not that obscure since its getting a series. And i havent even read it completely yet. But 1 friend of mine told me about it and now my tiktok page is getting bombarded with orv angst and im 💀💀💀 literally crying at every fucking stupid slideshow. HOW IS ONE SERIES THIS SAD. MAN.

10. The empress’ lipstick

Ngl i dropped this after she panicked about finding the lipstick bc i could not handle the stress. Somehow i can handle roxanas crazy plots but i couldnt handle this??? IN ANY CASE its still a really funny manhwa and i think the main character is hilarious while also giving some insight about beauty standards somehow???

Another series’ ive been enjoying is “royal marriage”, its not an isekai but it follows a really smart woman maneuvering through noble life and getting rid of trash and standing up for herself so its the same vibe as some of them villainess isekais :P

[tharrb]

The plantars: when being likable isn’t enough

Okay, so I see a couple of post about how the plantars are ignored by the fandom and that they, not Sasha and Marcy, are the true main characters. This is not me trying to negate anyone else’s beliefs, I’m just stating my viewpoint.

The truth, the reason the plantars are ignored in favor of the trio(and I apologize for being blunt here) are not interesting characters.

I mean, they don’t really change all that much over the course of the series. Sprig repeatedly gets into trouble and suffers no consequences from it, nor does he learn any lessons. The extent of hop pops growth is he learns to like new things. Polly is the only one to grow In a substantial way, by taking care of frobo, but for some reason the show decided to stop focusing her after friend or frobo, receiving only one focus episode in season 3.

What’s more, even when they do show signs of deeper characterization, it only comes up when it’s relevant to the plot. I mean, when it was shown that Sasha’s parents are divorced, it explained so much about why she is the way she is. Meanwhile, hop pops backstory gets explained…and then dosen’t become relevant again until all in.

Even worse, they also get a ton of focus episodes. The problem is that these episodes neither progress the plot nor further their characters arcs in a meaningful way, but instead to go on wacky misadventures. Even Anne, the main character, felt like she was playing second banana to them.

Looking back, I bemoan the fact that so much time could have been better spent on more interesting characters, not just the trio but other amphibians. In season 1, we could have gotten a lot more episodes dedicated to Anne bonding with all the wartwoodians, ultimately leading to them respecting her. But instead, we had sprig violating ms croakers privacy and hop pop trying to brainwash his grandkids.

Now I don’t think the plantars are bad characters by any means, I think they’re likable and fun enough. But likability alone isn’t enough to justify the amount of focus they had.

I think the problem is that the executives wanted them to be mascots for amphibia, and thus didn’t want them to stray to far from their initial personalities. It could also be because the writers are attached to them do to them being the season one main cast, and thus gives them preferable treatment despite not doing much with them.

It just…sucks, because they’re are signs that the plantars are deeper than they appear. But the show is afraid to meaningfully expand their characters in the long run.

[libraryleopard]

I was procrastinating on my homework by thinking about how much I want a New Mutants animated show and occasionally my sister @kazz-brekker​ and I bounce ideas for it off of each other, so I made some New Mutants characters on picrew.

Doug (left) and Warlock (right) are at the top. My sister and I call Doug a “Very Nice Boy” a lot (Alan Davis draws a very cute, huggable-looking Doug in particular) so I gave him a sweater because that kind of fits the vibe for me. Warlock takes on a human form a couple of times in the classic New Mutants comic so I made him in that form, with yellow eyes to indicate that’s there’s something not-quite-human about him. 

Roberto (left), has a Hawaiian shirt. I know he wears it as a reference to Magnum, PI, a show that a current-day teenager probably wouldn’t be into, but I just enjoy the vibe of that outfit for him. (The other day I was talking to my sister about how you’d update the New Mutants as modern teenagers and tormented her with cursed idea that the equivalent of Beto being into a detective show nowadays would be BBC Sherlock, but that’s mostly a joke.) 

I gave Sam (right) freckles and kind of shaggier hair because you can’t do much with face shapes on icon makers, but I’ve always liked that he and Doug have distinct looks from each other despite both being white teenage boys with blond hair. Beto and Sam’s relationship doesn’t read as romantic to me in the original New Mutants comics (I read them has having a three-year age difference in the Claremont run, which can be a significant maturity difference when you’re a teenager) but I do think there’s a vibe between them later on in X-Force (I still haven’t read Hickman’s New Mutants yet), so I think of them, and especially Beto, as bisexual. 

Dani (left) has her hair in her two iconic braids, of course. I think she and Sam have somewhat similar fashion choices as well as being co-leaders of the team, so she’s wearing overalls like he is. I imagine she’s wearing her Cheyenne belt just outside the frame of the picture. I think she should get to be the kind of central viewpoint character for the introduction of the team because 1) I love her and 2) I think it’s interesting that she’s not completely on board with Professor X at the start. She’s younger than Sam, but her age is never explicitly given that I’ve seen, so I think she’s about 15 when she joins the team.

Rahne (right) has her short hair and a hint of fangs to give a sense of her wolf form. I know Rahne has had a string of very bad stories in the 2000s, but in the Claremont run of New Mutants I very much read her as a baby lesbian with a crush on Dani whose struggles with being rejected by her religious community for being a mutants very much parallels and is intertwined with her sexuality. My hot take on New Muutants is that Rahne is not the baby of the team, that’s Beto (early on it says she’s 14 and Beto is 13, though I think that might get retconned later), and she’s just kind of short and naive so she comes off as younger.

X’ian (left) has her hair in the bob haircut with bangs she got in the early issues of the Claremont comics. (I do think her pink buzzcut from X-Force is kinda fun, but I think that’s very much something she would evolve as a character to get.) Also, since her name is actually incorrect by Vietnamese naming conventions, I think an adaptation should have the freedom to call her Xuyen instead. (I also think a lot of her storylines in the early comics, like the grossly fatphobic Shadow King storyline, should be discarded and writers could create new stories for her in an adaptation of the comics. Also, she’s a lesbian, of course. (God bless Vita Ayala for finally giving her a girlfriend.)

Illyana (left) is another member of the overalls gang because she wears them sometimes as a teenager. I know she’s all goth as an adult, but I think that’s less present in her character design as a kid. Designing these characters is also making me realize that in my ideal world like half of the New Mutants are lesbians.

Amara (right) looks completely different from her comics version because I hate the comics version of Amara! In this version, she’d be indigenous Brazilian and…not Empath’s girlfriend. I think, like Xuyen, an adaptation could rewrite a lot of her stories and be the better for it (I believe X-Men: Evolution did, though I’ve never seen it).

I included Tabby (left) because I think she’d be a fun character to join the later seasons of a New Mutants cartoon. She’s not an original member of the team, but she and the other X-Factor kids do end up joining the New Mutants after the events of X-Terminators. 

Rictor (bottom because I ran out of regular image spaces) would also join the New Mutants later. I know he was being a baby punk in this era, but the clothing options didn’t include that, so I gave him a Star Trek t-shirt because he does canonically like Star Trek. He also has long hair because I enjoy when Rictor has long hair! Out of all of these characters, he’s the one I’m incapable of calling by his civilian name because canonically doesn’t let many people call him that. Anyway, I think he and Tabby are tight best friends and I like their relationship.

I also included Shatterstar because 1) he is technically a New Mutants character since he was introduced in the final issue before it relaunched into X-Force and 2) I like him. In this version, he’s biracial because Dazzler’s original character concept had her be a Black disco singer, though I kept his red hair because it’s an iconic part of his character design. I do like how Yasmin Putri drew him on the covers of the Tim Seeley Shatterstar solo series (even if I didn’t like the writing or some of the interior art), so I very badly gave him a glowing eye and a star mark. Also I gave him a little braid because I like when he has a little braid :)

Anyway, I have a lot of other thoughts about a New Mutants cartoon and in particular how a lot of their superpower would translate better to animation than live action, but I’ve spent enough time procrastinating by making this.

[ryouverua]

Saimota is a fantastic ship that only improves with age and their respective maturity. Right from the get-go we see this in canon, too! They have a tumultuous first clash at the end of chapter 1 which is immediately turned on its head, and the subsequent growth and development of their in-game relationship really stands out that much more because of it.

This is a long one, so strap in!

Kaito realizes his mistake in his approach after punching him the night before and rectifies it immediately the next morning when he notices Shuichi hasn’t come to breakfast, rightly guessing that he’s stewing in his own grief and misery. And then, being the emotionally intelligent guy he is, he follows up that night and drags him out to exercise (which, y’know, releases endorphins and is scientifically proven to help with mood boosts and even depression) - a move which Shuichi says in chapter 5 saved his life.

A couple days pass and a body drops. Kaito supports him through the investigation knowing that Kaede had been with him last time and that there’s a danger of him relapsing. In the trial, too, Kaito makes every effort to let Shuichi know that he isn’t alone and someone does have his back if he fumbles. This is the real moment that Shuichi chooses to depend on Kaito and is rewarded for it, and while Kaito does get plenty of ego-feed out of it, he believes in Shuichi and his talent wholeheartedly (enough so that it’ll come back to bite him later). But despite it being framed as a ‘hero and sidekick’ relationship, it’s not just for Kaito’s self-worth - it’s to take some of the mental load off of Shuichi, who really, really doesn’t want the pressure of everyone’s lives solely on his shoulders, and is now dealing with the guilt of two cases where uncovering the guilty party hurt him.

(quick chapter 2 interlude! while this is where a lot of the big hero-worship begins for Shuichi and happens to be where I also did his first FTE and got to witness this:

this is also the chapter when these moments happen, post-breakfast and post-casino scene respectively:

and this happens in the very next FTE:

mmm yes, the duality of man. Suffice it to say, while Shuichi has definite rose-coloured glasses on for a lot of the game, Kaito is definitely not an invincible, untouchable hero in his eyes)

Interestingly enough, despite Shuichi still very much leaning into their friendship (and vice versa), they don’t spend a lot of time together in Chapter 3 after he brings Maki out to training that first night! While Chapter 4 is their real ‘break’, Kaito spends a lot of time in his room in the second half while Shuichi gets to know Maki better. And while Maki is a much, uh, meaner investigation partner (love you girl, but that tongue is sharp), they make a great team. Shuichi also starts poking at Kaito’s reason for holing up in his room, incorrectly guess that it’s just related to the occult being brought up. Most importantly, Shuichi is able to do an investigation on his own independent of Kaito just a week after the end of Chapter 1.

Chapter 4 and its immediate aftermath in 5 is great because it showcases Kaito’s flaws and insecurity, and what conflict between the two of them look like. It’s because Kaito respects Shuichi so much that cracks in his own confidence start appearing - and while Shuichi can be obtuse and awkward at times, he shows signs of wanting to broach some more sensitive topics with Kaito; if you do FTEs with Kaito in Ch 4, he even has an inner narrative in which he notes that Kaito had said his stomach hurt before.

He’s not so self-absorbed as to not worry about his friend (but narratively we gotta save that juicy plot point and subsequent reveal for the end of the trial) but hey, Kaito wants to chill and just shoot the shit - so why not have some downtime with his friend in the murder school. Btw, their FTE availability ends here - so if Shuichi has completed them with Kaito, he’s already had his canon-saimota thoughts at this point. While I have given Shuichi the side-eye for his ‘I can rely on Kaito for anything’ spiel, he is fully able and willing to stand up to Kaito in the Chapter 4 trial despite his canon feelings for him at that point. By the way, it’s been a week and a half since the end of Chapter 1 at this point. Shuichi and Kaito have had an arc together where they become fast friends in a pressure-cooker situation and bonding over shared grief for Kaede (even if Kaito’s is less obvious), Shuichi starts as dependent on Kaito’s emotional support but learns to stand on his own two feet, and Kaito is forced to confront his own weakness and hero persona, all while classmates are dropping (including Kaito’s own ex-hero figure, a stark reminder that ‘heroes’ do have flaws).

So the beginning of Chapter 5 is wild to me because of how it’s so often misinterpreted as Kaito immaturely giving Shuichi the silent treatment despite the entirety of the game preceding it explicitly showing that Kaito will tell you, loudly, when he’s angry at you, and that’s purely because we’re in Shuichi’s perspective and he thinks that’s what’s going on - but that’s a bit of a tangent. What I like about it is how we get to see what happens when Kaito (as sick as he is at that point) feels badly and embarrassed with someone he is close to; he withdraws as opposed to lashing out. And while Shuichi is really, really bad at reaching out too without an inciting incident (tunnel escape), he does try and broach the topic when push comes to shove. He’s not lost in hero worship, not even close - he is rightfully upset that the person he’s closest to at the school is upset while still maintaining to himself and the others that his actions were correct. He doesn’t waver on this, despite his attempt to offer an olive branch at the window of the hangar’s bathroom. He truly stands by his own choices in the last class trial and know he won't back down on that if push comes to shove, and that's important - he won't yield the point just to appease Kaito. Shuichi then manages the investigation on his own, leads the trial on his own, faces off with Maki (and who he thinks is Kokichi) on his own, because he has *reached* a point where he can be independent. And to bring it back to how we get a look at ‘saimota in conflict’, Shuichi and Kaito both make amends with each other by the end of the chapter. Even if it’s spurred by it being their final goodbye, Shuichi gets to say his piece, Kaito lays out one of his own vulnerabilities so he can make peace with Shuichi - and even if I’d love to have had them delve into all of Kaito's various issues, there is a very murderous robobear overseeing this which makes time a factor - and I firmly believe that if they had more time, they could’ve resolved even more of the issues that would come up for Saimota. The groundwork wasn’t just there; there was already half the structure in place. And that’s what makes saimota even more appealing to me, tbh. We get to see them build a relationship, run into a big issue, struggle through it and resolve it by the end of the game - and it means that there’s precedent for them to do it again as more interpersonal challenges come up! It’s a goldmine of ship exploration, and they care about each other enough to work through it.

… By the way, at this point they are 2 weeks past the end of Chapter 1.

Imagine if they had more time. Imagine if Shuichi, who is absolutely dogged in pursuing an issue once he catches wind of it (despite how he can get wrapped up in his own head), who cares a lot for other people, who doesn’t just find runaways as part of his detective talent, but follows up with them after because he cares about more than just finishing the job, had the chance to spend years with Kaito and realize he uses his hero persona to protect a much more fragile sense of self. Imagine Shuichi forming that initial friendship with Kaito without the albatross of Kaede’s death hanging around his neck; about how he’ll still look up to Kaito and his fantastic positivity, passion and excellence in his chosen field, and that would only be matched by Kaito’s own admiration of Shuichi’s skills as a detective. Imagine if Kaito, who repeatedly shows the ability to reflect and change his mind when presented with evidence against his viewpoint and was able to express his own insecurity and jealousy to Shuichi in the end, was given the breathing room and space to get more comfortable with doing so. Imagine how difficult and emotionally mature they were to navigate as well as they did in a life-or-death situation that took place over a couple of weeks tops, and how much more they could grow if given the time and space for it.

... And this was nearly going to be where I ended the post, until Ira reminded me of TDP and sent me this wonderful Saimota event (which takes place before the final graduation/training trio event):

Oh hey, Shuichi picked up his catchphrase! It's quite cute how he's finishing Kaito's sentence here - he's spent a couple of years being friends with Kaito at this point, and has even taken up exercising on his own for stress relief. I wonder whose influence that was?

Anyway -

Shuichi has figured out at this point that he does need to firmly extend that helping hand to Kaito rather than worry and keep it to himself. On the other side, Kaito has learned that it is okay to accept that outstretched hand, even if he doesn't need it right now - that he can admit that some day, he might. He's being blase, sure, but it is a far cry from his in-game 'I don't/won't need help'. Good for you, Kaito - you've grown a lot! And that's the most important thing their TDPs show - their capacity for growth not just as individuals, but in a relationship. Of course there will be bumps along the way - it’s very rare that any relationship won’t have them! - but they've proven that they can work these problems in the worst of circumstances. This is by far one of the strongest ships with canon foundation in the entire series, and my goodness do I still love it years later.

[snowlily95]

Aerith in light of healthcare provider

So, I've wanted to write an analysis about Aerith in light of her medical viewpoint for quite a long time but only recently got the chance to complete it. It is well known in the game that Aerith is the healer of the story. She possesses a great MP with a limit break to heal and buff people which greatly affects your gameplay. Of course, you can equip others with Healing and Prayer materias to render them useful for healing as well. But story-wise, no one can take away Aerith's status as the healer. We know in canon that Aerith provided herbs to the Sector 5 slums doctor to create medicine. And if you finished the Corneo Stash side quest in Chapter 14, you can return to the church and see a couple of elderly sitting on the pew praying. And when you come closer to them you'll hear them talking about how they didn't see Aerith around and they're sure she's alright and probably be around healing people. You know, since the Sector 7 plate just fell. (Even though Aerith is not alright actually coz she was kidnapped by Shinra by this time) Point is, we are fed by the NPCs on how much Aerith had helped around as a healer. She had been doing this for years.

While being in denial about who she actually is, being a healer had always been implanted in her. She is used to it. When you're used to being a healer, there's a certain level when you have a different reaction compared to others. The way you think is different. Apart from that, she's also a Cetra. And we knew for a fact Cetra had a certain affinity towards souls who are returning to the Planet. Meaning, as much as she is used to healing others, she's also used to sensing death.

My whole point is that being a Cardiac Anaesthesiologist and Intensivist as I am, I can totally relate my position with Aerith, as we both have constantly helped people and encounter death on daily basis. While I'm pretty confident that the majority of these might be coincidences (because I'm pretty sure there are no doctors in the SE team), I thought the coincidences are pretty cool to ponder upon and I'm amazed at how the subtle differences between Aerith's reaction to events from other characters.

I'm gonna ignore the meta part of Aerith, mainly because I'm not discussing how much Aerith knew, and if there was anything in jeopardy of what she knew whatsoever. So we're gonna focus on the fact that she is used to healing and feeling people's death. People who are used to death on daily basis had a certain unique view on life and death. And that affects how we act upon facing them too. While this is evident throughout Remake, I'm gonna focus on the plate drop event to be more concise. I will also use Tifa as a comparison to make it easier to see the difference between the reaction of the two. Let’s start!

1) Aerith is quick in emergency situations.

When you are used to people dying, you developed a certain immunity and you are able to have a sound mind and composure at the sudden change of event. As healthcare providers, we face stable situations turning into critical real fast. And we have a switch in our minds that turns us from standby mode to rescue mode. This is exactly what happened to Aerith when Don Corneo revealed Shinra's plan to blow up Sector 7's support pillar. Tifa is part of Sector 7. It is her home. Which is why her reaction showed how she was super devastated, she slowly stood up and muttered "They wouldn't..." because she couldn't believe it. Aerith? She had that switch in her mind, and she immediately turned and say "Come on, guys! We gotta go!". She switched into that critical mode in a second. It helps that she's also not personally connected to Sector 7, and thus her judgment was not as impaired. Of course, they both switched into the critical mode in the sewer, but it was at the moment of revelation that made it different. Just like how healthcare providers switched at the moment of revelation that their patients are at the brink of death—you immediately jumped into rescue mode.

2) She plans for the worst.

Remember after they defeated Abzu and Tifa started to question Corneo's information? She didn't want to believe it, because it didn't make sense to destroy your years of efforts building the plate just to get back to a small group like AVALANCHE. Think about the money they put in to build it, they're gonna have to put them all again. In fact, along their way out of the sewer, Tifa voiced out multiple times how this had been bothering her. But I'm intrigued with Aerith's reply "If he's telling the truth, then we should go. And if it turns out he was lying, then so what?". This here is exactly what doctors do. We plan and prepare for the worst. And if the worst didn't happen, then so what? If you ever had life-saving surgery, your doctors would tell you "You need this surgery coz you might die. But if you do the surgery, there's a high chance you'll survive, but there's a small chance you'll die too". And we prepare for that small chance that our patients die. No, we don't let our preparations lacking because we hope they'll survive. We prepare for the worst outcome possible and get all the equipment ready in case they'll die. If they didn't, then so what? It doesn't mean our preparations were futile efforts. It only means we were prepared. And that line of Aerith seriously hits home to me.

3) She hopes for the best.

Before they crossed the water sewer, Tifa once again voiced out how she couldn't stop thinking about what Corneo said, and she was still hoping that he was lying. And then Aerith said, "The future isn't set in stone". (Again, I'm gonna ignore the meta part of Aerith) And then she proceeded to set up that small date with Tifa. Believe it or not, this is actually what we do during bad calls. We'd talk about what we would do after all this ends; we'd go out dining, or playing games/darts, or go drinking, or whatever it is that makes us happy. Just to keep our minds calm and to allow us to hope for the future, even if it's just a few hours away. It gives us hope and courage to go on. We plan for the worst, but we hope for the best. The more critical the situation is, the more you need to be level-headed. And needless to say, after this point onwards, Tifa is much more calmed down from her struggle to keep herself focus.

4) She follows orders.

This might sound weird to some, but the ability to cast away your worry and focus on what you can do, instead of what you should do, is important in emergency situations. You need to know what you don't know. You don't get in the way of your comrades. If you're not good at intubating, you don't insist to intubate in emergency situations just because you wanna help. Seriously, you'll just make things worse. When Cloud, Tifa, and Aerith were attacked before climbing up and out of the sewer, Cloud asked both Tifa and Aerith to keep going. Aerith immediately answers "Okay" and left—without a single but. This is significant because it shows that Aerith knew she'd be better off leaving. She doesn't need to offer help, coz her help was not needed. This is not the place where she could help. The ability to recognize this is very important for healthcare professionals. Tifa was a bit more reluctant to leave, but that's probably because she is a martial artist in-game. Also, the fact that Aerith could still joke "We're not delicious" is just so real lol! Yup, we joke sometimes when we're facing deaths—doesn't mean we lose focus in saving the dying person in front of us, don't worry. And then it happens again when they reached Sector 7 when Cloud asked them to stay with Wedge as he goes up, Aerith immediately answered "sure"—because she can "patch" Wedge up, it's where her abilities lie. This is even more accentuated when an injured Wedge argued that he can still fight when he clearly can't—making this point even more obvious. Aerith is someone with a healthcare mind, Wedge was not.

5) She supports her comrades emotionally even when she’s worried too.

When they reached the surface, they spotted a Shinra helicopter. Cloud assured them they're only on patrol. Aerith turned to Tifa and said, "Don't worry, we'll make it in time". This moment is also very iconic to me. As I mentioned, I'm an anaesthesiologist. We are the support doctors to surgeons and physicians. Those moments when we're operating on AAA surgeries and the patient is losing liters of blood and literally dying, we're pumping bloods in with our hands and get those Level 1 machines operating, and the surgeons would be panicking because it keeps bleeding? Yep, I did say it before. "We'll make it. Just concentrate on the surgery and don't worry about the bleeding", even though I'm sweating and dying here trying to keep the patient alive. But I pretended to be calm in front of my team and cheered them on. Because the whole team needs to keep calm. If one of the team loses hope, then bid your chance farewell. As an anaesthesiologist, we're almost like the anchor in the room. People look at us to know if everything's alright. I need to tell them it's alright, so they need not worry. Aerith knew Tifa is worried. And she tried to keep Tifa calm with reassurance. Even if she probably freaked out herself.

6) She doesn’t discriminate.

After they defeated the ghost at the haunted maintenance facility, Cloud tried to kill it, and Aerith didn't let him. When Cloud said that thing was dangerous, Aerith said she knows and added "but even so..." she didn't feel right about killing it. (Let's ignore the fact that the Ghoul was a lonely creature for now) It then goes to drop the train wreck which almost killed them had it not been for Cloud. Now this would have been avoided had Aerith let Cloud killed it—maybe. But here's the thing. When you're hyper-aware that people are dying left and right, you value life more. No one deserves to die, even the worst criminal in the world. You're a law-abiding citizen? You're a criminal? It doesn't make a difference to us. I know this is something super hard to comprehend. But technically only when the law subjects the criminal to the death sentence that a person should be left to die. I've been a doctor for eleven years, I was a prison doctor for two. I had the first-hand experience of dealing with criminals. It's not my job to determine whether they deserve to die or not. It's not my call whether they will turn a new leaf had they lived. I know this is something others find difficult to relate to and agree with—happens to my non-medical family and friends. The verdict to us is simple. It's a life. It's worth saving. Period. (Technically the ghosts are dead though but my point still stands)

7) She tries to her best abilities and lets go of what is out of her control.

Tifa's emotions are tampered with again when they confirmed Shinra was going to drop the plate when they overheard the Turks conversation. Her voice shook, we can literally hear it. Aerith's response was "all we can do now is keep moving". And she's right. When they reached Sector 7 and the Whispers were preventing them, she said "we have to get past whatever it takes". And later on, Tifa left to help Cloud and Barret, and Aerith agreed to get to Seventh Heaven to ensure Marlene's safety. Wedge had a short mental breakdown when he realized he was no good to anyone up or down the crime scene. And Aerith told him "We can still save a lot of lives", "That's no excuse to give up", "I need to know I did everything I could". Her encouragement helped Wedge save more people. Some argued, did she not care about the lives that already died? Now here's my point; no, we don't. Sorry if this sounds harsh, but really. What can we do for people who are already dead? Nothing. What can we do for people who are still alive? Everything. And this is the core of being a healthcare provider—we prioritize. Yes, we're also humans. We can get emotional when our own friends and relatives die. (Aerith might not be as calm had it happened at Sector 5) But when we put the healthcare provider cap on, we mean business. That is why when disasters happened, and we triage people with a black tag? That's when we know we couldn't do anything for them. We don't mourn at the black tags. We move on to the other tags instead. So that we know we already did everything in our power to help. And yes, it doesn't matter even if we lost more lives than we saved. It's worth it, even if we only saved one person out of thousands of deaths. Just like how Aerith saved Betty in Sector 7. That one life is worth it.