#there WERE good parts though
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Even More Real Parts
So my kid is in high school, and he got involved in something this year at school, which means J and I are spending more time at high school (especially me, because J works outside home and can't make it to every high school Thing our son needs to show up at/participate in). And I don't know if any of you other Gen X/Millennial folks have noticed this, but the 90s are somehow now the Nostalgic Throwback Fashion high school kids are recycling. It's fucking bizarre. Sometimes while I'm sitting in the school pick up lot, watching the children myself and my peers created walk out of school it's legit like I traveled back in time 20-30 years. One ginger kid walked out holding a trumpet case and wearing baggy basketball shorts and high tops with black short socks when it was under 50 degrees outside, and I almost texted A to ask him if there was an unknown heir up here somewhere in my son's school district. Or maybe I hadn't fallen into some crack in the space-time continuum. It was freakish and wild. (Seriously the kid looked just like A did 28 years ago standing there waiting on a ride, trumpet case and all).
Anyway, all this shit is a lead into me thinking almost involuntarily about high school, and that makes me think about my first boyfriend. I talk a whole bunch about J and he's the love of my life, and I consider him my first love, because I really didn't feel or understand romantic love until I met J (no shit), but I did get REAL lucky as a guilt-ridden, almost totally asexual, maybe on the autism spectrum, naive nerd with my first boyfriend in high school. He was (and still is) a gem. For serious. I could not have done better and he set the bar pretty fucking high for sequential relationships, and I'm damn glad he did. Because I know from even adult friendship experience, getting taken in by a shitbag in a romantic/dating setting could have been catastrophic. He gave me the gift of high standards. He gave me, 'G would never say that...do that...act like that with/for/to me, so you can go kick rocks, you dumb fucker...'
The way G let Shy and Oblivious Me know he was interested was so creative and sweet and brave. Truly very Knight in Shining Armor type shit. He did it in the 8th grade before we split up to go to different high schools, which was temporarily tragic because it takes me a while, even with very CLEAR expression to accept that a person could actually like me. But I eventually figured it out when we were attending those different high schools, and it (obviously temporarily, but importantly, I think) worked out. And G was my first kiss ever, and it was literary. Like it really happened in Sappy Rom/Com Style. And I wrote those things as they happened into my story, Admission. So there they are. I'd apologize for the length, but I'm not really sorry, honestly. Between A and G and J? I'm not sorry for being me all the time like I used to be.
With my son having a rough time of things at the beginning of the school year, I've found myself spending a lot of time searching for the good parts of high school, so I could highlight them for him. So I could share with my son what helped me survive. A and G were the best parts of high school for me, and there were times when they were the only good parts. I've never thought of G as anything other than a good part. I wish there was a way that people (especially men) would accept a sincere thank you for making your life better. G made my life better, even though we didn't grow up and get married. A makes my life better just being my friend. But it makes them feel weird if I directly tell them that, so I write them into fiction. In the beginning of Admission, the real parts are G.
#reliving high school with my kid has so far been the hardest and weirdest part of parenthood#there WERE good parts though
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🏳️⚧️ DOUBLE HEADCANON ATTACK!!! 🏳️⚧️
Family HCs are already fun on their own but with transness added on they're even better. It's actual comedy gold. Also I've always wanted to draw some kind of Meta Knight VS Galacta Knight type thing, but I can't take anything seriously like that. So you get This.
What This is, is a way too high effort shitpost. It took a combined 2 and a half? Days, though most of it was just sketching. I'm proud of it! Anything for the bit.
Textless version + unfinished doodle under the cut
#kirby#kirby series#galacta knight#galactabro#does he know? (he does not know)#meta knight#trans meta knight#trans mask even. is anyone there. whatever.#my art#my doodles#anyway. the extra doodle was originally gonna be part of the main drawing#specifically the bottom one. i think you can really tell by how much effort i put into it#But in the end it wasn't looking like i pictured it#i was also struggling trying to draw GK's lance in a way that didn't completely annoy me#so i gave up#i also gave up coloring it. sorry#i love colored lineart!#also i swear on my life i intended to shade this#i tried. thought about how it was almost 12 am. and decided against it#i do like how it looks unshaded though#i'm not very good at shading/lighting yet so it would've probably looked muddy#thank god for filters#i hope you guys like mk's wings those were also a source of eternal torment#i'm so happy with how they look though#also. obligatory baby orb. squish him and bake him into bread okay?
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the worst parent poll made me realize just how many ppl in the fandom are willing to jump straight into abuse apologia. bc on one hand you have ppl dumbing down crow's abuse to "him just being mean" and on the other end you have ppl saying that curlfeather didnt abuse frostpaw because she sacrificed herself and frost + her siblings love her so she couldnt possibly be an abuser. truly mindboggling stuff take these serious topics away from the fandom asap.
Part of me feels like it's because many in this fandom have a feeling that if a character's actions are abusive, it means you're "not allowed" to like them. Like there's an impulse where if you liked a character, it MUST mean they weren't THAT bad, because you'd personally never like "an abuser."
As if it reflects poorly on your own morality, as a person, that you connected with An Abuser. Understood them, even. Even if it was just a character.
If it's immoral to Like Abusive Characters, of course your reaction is going to end up being abuse apologia. To enjoy something isn't logical, it's emotional, so you will get defensive about it when questioned. When you do, it's not going to be based on logic because you didn't reason yourself into that position in the first place. It's an attack on you as a person.
I feel like that's often the root of abuse apologia in this fandom, and sometimes the world at large; "If I admit that this character/person IS abusive, it means I was doing something bad by liking them, so I have to prove to everyone else that they weren't or it means I'm bad too."
And to that I say... That's a BAD impulse! Grow up and admit you resonated with a character that did a bad thing! If that's an uncomfortable thought, sit with it!
Sometimes abusers are likeable! They usually DO think they're justified in their actions, or doing it for "a good reason," or were just too preoccupied to care. MOST of the time, people who commit abusive actions are also hurt or traumatized in some way. You might even empathize with them. None of this means their actions have to be excused or downplayed.
"Abusers" aren't a type of goddamn yokai, they're people just like you and me. You don't help victims of abuse by putting the people who hurt us in an "untouchable" category.
In fact, all it does is make you less likely to recognize your own controlling behavior. You're capable of abuse. People you love are capable of it, too. People who love YOU can still hurt you.
In spite of how often people regurgitate "It's Ok To Like A Character As Long As You're Critical Of Their Actions," every day it is proven to me further and further that no one who says it actually understands what that means.
All that said; I think it's no contest which one's a worse parent, imo.
They both mistreated their children, but Curlfeather did it through manipulation without verbal or physical abuse. She politically groomed her into a position of power so that she could use her as a pawn. It can be argued if this counts as child abuse-- but it's firmly still under the broad category childhood maltreatment, which is damaging.
(though anon I'm with you 100% at seeing RED when "but she sacrificed herself" is used as an excuse. Curlfeather's death does NOT CHANGE what she did to Frostpaw in life. I think it's a valid point to bring up when comparing her to another terrible parent for judgement purposes, such as in the context of this poll, but I really hate the implication that redemption deaths "make up" for maltreatment.)
Crowfeather, meanwhile, is textually responsible for putting Breezepaw through verbal AND physical abuse, as well as child neglect. His motivations include embarrassment from a hurt ego, revenge on his ex, and being sad because of a dead girlfriend. This abuse drives Breezepelt towards radicalization in the Dark Forest.
You could argue Curlfeather is a worse person for Reedwhisker's murder, but as a parent? It's not even a question to me. Crowfeather's one of the worst dads in WC.
#Recently I've been reading a book on verbal abuse by Patricia Evans#And something I really appreciate about it is the way that it explains the way that abusive people *think*#The way that victim and abuser typically have a WILDLY different view of the world#The most important thing about this book though it how much it stresses that *these impulses are still human*#They play these power games to keep a sense of control in their relationship. It feels GOOD to hurt and dominate their partner.#And even when it describes the worst of humanity and the behaviors that escalate into physical violence--#--the book keeps in mind that anyone could change. But not everyone will. And it is NOT your responsibility as a victim to change them.#Reading it is painful but also very validating.#I wish I'd heard of it several years ago when I was first leaving that relationship lmao#but. How do you reconcile it when one of the most traumatic experiences of your life was an act of love in their eyes?#When it *wasn't* part of a game to hurt you but something they legitimately did in the thought they were protecting you.#You don't even get the satisfaction of having it just be nice and simple. That it was bad and we allll agree it was bad.#Frostie girlie you and me are going out to Carvel's and I'm buying us both a milkshake#warrior cats analysis#child abuse
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I mostly love season 3 of ATLA, but I wish we'd gotten like, one or two more episodes of seeing Zuko as a new member of the gaang. He got some individual time with everyone (except Toph so sad. But even then their relationship was pretty established), but it would have been fun to see the completed Gaang fight some random threat so we could see how Zuko would work with all of them.
Like bring back one of the season one villains- I vote the pirates (though I guess they wouldn't be a credible threat on their own, so team them up with idk the rough rhinos or some new one-off threat). since that would lead to the most fun callbacks.
-Toph would be really mad that they fought pirates and never told her. Then she would be bitterly disappointed that the pirates weren't as cool as she thought they would be. She'd also be floored to hear Katara stole from the pirates and be like "how could you not tell me you did something that cool! Why did you think you needed to pull a scam when you could have just told me that and impressed me!"
-Katara would insist that Zuko be tied to the tree and used as bait for the bad guys at one point and Zuko would comply out of guilt.
-Zuko would have to explain that Zhao hired the pirates to kill him and they nearly succeeded when they blew up his ship.
and Aang would be like "Oh THAT'S why you were all beat up. I always assumed Katara did that."
Sokka: Yeah, I was sure Katara just punched you in the face a bunch and slashed you with some icicles.
Katara: awwww you guys!
Zuko: Why are you so flattered by that?
-Hawky could return solely to fight the parrot while Momo looks on approvingly. And maybe bond with Zuko a bit in a callback to the pilot.
-Katara could steal something else from the pirates. Just for kicks. With Toph's enthusiastic support. Suki too. Girls supporting girls committing larceny.
-Zuko and Katara accidentally cancel out each other's attacks at one point during the melee and get into an immature argument Aang has to break up
-The pirates ask where Iroh is or mention him and Zuko gets all misty like
"you were right, Uncle...I couldn't see that my own ship had set sail...I even threw his pai sho tile away...just another sin on my list..."
"Zuko please focus"
Maybe it would have disrupted the tension, but I would have loved to see those shenanigans happen.
#basically writing a fanfic here i guess#avatar the last airbender#zuko#toph#katara#aang#the problem is that all the season 3 eps are so good i wouldn't know which one to sacrifice for that extra one#nightmares and daydreams I guess? though I do think it's important to establish aangs under pressure#actually maybe I'd sacrifice a big chunk of the first part of the day of black sun. the fighting parts with the tanks were pretty boring
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#mine#doctor who#dwedit#david tennant#freema agyeman#haven't giffed this part in a while!#when i was driving home today i felt so exhausted#and i have a feeling i'm gonna come down with a cold later this week ;__;#last year i think i lasted until november before i got sick sighhh#i'm listening to gallifrey war room 2 though!!! absolutely loving it#i also finished the once and future story with ten and missy and the paternoster gang#i loved it!!! ten and missy were a delight together!!!!#ok bye good night friends
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Y'know, it's unfortunate more people don't compare Louis and Violet in good faith.
Like, when I do see people compare them, it's usually through the lens of one is good, and the other bad. One is more canon than the other, and here's why. One is objectively better for Clementine, and the other is less impactful, worse written, didn't have chemistry with her, insert several insults here, etc.
I don't think it's inherently bad to express why you might not like one of them, or why you prefer one over the other. That's fine, that's a matter of opinion. It only gets to me when it becomes hostile, or passive aggressive... but even then, I've learned to just roll my eyes and move on. Some people make it very clear that they're not worth having a discussion with.
However, I wish I could read more nuanced comparisons of the two that didn't default to the "and that's why this one is better." At least some are kind enough to tack on a "for my Clementine" at the end.
You know how it goes: Louis is cute and he makes Clementine laugh, whereas Violet's boring, her love is shallow, she's still not over Minerva and she's using Clementine as a rebound. Violentine's a bad ship because Violet's actually a traitor, and they're practically the same person and that's bad.
Violet's loyal and reliable, whereas Louis is annoying, he never takes anything serious, he's a traitor for his vote, and he's nothing but a distraction. Clouis is a bad ship because how could any Clementine possibly like him after he voted her and AJ out? That's bad!
That's always the conclusion, right? One good, one bad.
This is incredibly limiting and it drives me nuts.
They're foils. They contrast one another, highlight each other's strengths and flaws, in such an interesting way that it makes Clementine's choice between them all the more meaningful.
One is not good and the other bad, they're different, and I think that's worth exploring.
Let's start with a common argument: Violet is the more impactful option due to her connection to Minerva.
Now, to be fair, I can understand why someone on Team Violet would believe this. Yes, it's true that the confrontation with Minerva is more impactful for a violentine shipper who has more investment in Violet as a character. Louis doesn't have as strong of a connection to her.
However, what they're failing to recognize is that Minerva isn't the only ghost to haunt this narrative. Violet may have Minerva, yes, but Louis has Marlon... and that doesn't just go away once Marlon's dead.
Violet's route has Minerva as her ex-girlfriend, and her bond with Tenn that all comes to a head on the bridge. Louis' route has Marlon's death and how that specifically impacts his relationship with AJ and Clementine, and the slow burn of forgiveness on all sides.
Marlon and Minerva are also reflective of Clementine's worst outcomes.
Clementine and Marlon were tied together through Brody's blood splattered on their hands and faces. They both killed a part of Brody, but only one of them lies about who killed her first.
After Marlon dies, Clementine gradually replaces him throughout the game; Rosie is her dog now, she uses his bow [which Louis gave her], she becomes the leader. Clementine gets them to fight back, and when three of her people are captured, she doesn't cut her losses. She does what Marlon couldn't; "we're getting them back."
When she chooses Louis, he does for her what he never did for Marlon: he steps up.
Clementine proves she won't become Marlon just as she proves she won't become Minerva.
After getting James to agree to help them, Clementine and AJ talk about what to do if she ever gets bit. AJ says he'd want her to bite him, too. He repeats this sentiment after she's actually bitten, telling her he wants to stay and they could turn together, peacefully.
When Minerva confronts them on the bridge, she's dying... and she wants Tenn to die with her. She doesn't care who she has to kill in the process. She's more monster than human at this point, and most times, she succeeds.
They're both bitten. Clementine could've become a monster like Minerva in the end. She could've killed AJ, and they could've become walkers together. But she didn't. Minerva wanted Tenn to die for her, and Clementine wanted AJ to live for her.
Also, I should mention she has Minerva's axe. She carries the key weapons associated with Marlon and Minerva throughout different points in the game, further solidifying these connections. She uses Marlon's bow to save her friends, and she uses Minerva's axe to save AJ, who in turn uses it to save her.
What's also so interesting about this is how Marlon's alive in episode one, and Minerva is thought to be dead. Louis has his best friend, and Violet's lost hers. But, at the end of the episode, Marlon's dead and Minerva's revealed to be alive.
Marlon becomes the ghost, and Minerva becomes the monster. Clementine becomes to Louis and Violet what Marlon and Minerva never could... how does that not drive anyone else insane?
So, no. One is not objectively better, or more impactful, because of a connection to Marlon or Minerva. They're different. It just depends on which storyline you personally find more compelling.
Actually, let's talk about that a little more.
In my opinion, the most intriguing point of comparison between Louis and Violet stems from their perceptions of survival, and how that impacts Clementine.
An argument I see made against violentine is that Violet's boring because she and Clementine are too similar. This usually comes from clouis shippers who prefer the "opposites attract" dynamic Clementine and Louis have.
On the flip side, there's the counter argument that Louis is reckless, that he doesn't take survival as seriously as he should and Clementine wouldn't want him because of that.
These are interesting to me because I get where they're coming from... but they ultimately miss the point.
The other day, I replayed TFS. Except this time, I did something a little bit differently. I played my usual clouis route, but then I had the violentine route pulled up on my laptop so that I could watch these scenes, comparing them side by side… and something occurred to me.
Louis is about challenging Clementine's perception of survival, and Violet is about validating it.
Louis challenges Clementine from the very moment we meet him—he’s playing music. His initial philosophy on survival butts heads with Clementine’s. The fact that hunting with him and Aasim challenges your perception of “your choices have consequences.” These games have conditioned the player to think along the lines of, “Yeah, Louis is more fun… but if I don’t hunt with Aasim, we won’t have any food.”
Except that’s just it. I hate to say it, Aasim, but in the grand scheme of things… hunting with you doesn’t matter. It's actually less rewarding. You know why? Because in the next section, we get food from the train station. It would’ve been more beneficial to spend time with Louis over hunting, hence how he challenges you.
This then primes you for the choice between choosing to follow Louis or follow Violet. I know people complain about how this is presented with Violet doing something productive [checking the walls] and Louis playing piano… but that’s the point. If you’re going through with Louis’ full route, you need to meet him at his level, and in turn, he will meet you at yours. You need to accept the challenge, the idea that Clementine isn’t entirely right about the way she’s gone about survival.
Oh, and do I even need to mention the vote? The debate over Louis’ vote is exhausting. Often times, people tell on themselves in how they talk about it. It’s not actually about the fact that he voted against them. If it was, these people would have a bigger bone with pick with Mitch, Willy, Ruby, and Omar… and yet Louis is the one who takes all the blame as if he’s the only one personally kicking them out.
Louis is reacting to the death of his best friend, and the complicated feelings that come with it being caused by AJ. He wants accountability, even if he knows something's wrong. You can either agree with him that it was murder, and set AJ on the path of atonement… or, you can double down and tell him to fuck off, AJ was justified.
But here’s the thing… the vote adds to the appeal of Louis’ route. To someone who hates him, or at the very least is critical of his vote, that sounds mad or delusional.
Except it’s really not.
Ever heard of a thing called tension? Because there’s a lot of it in ep2 between clouis + AJ and it’s fantastic.
Yes, Louis voting them out is problematic because we need a problem to solve. We need something to feed the tension between him and Clementine. He stepped in front of a gun held by his best friend in order to protect her, forever changing their relationship… only for that to seemingly be taken away from us the moment AJ shoots Marlon.
Yes, Louis’ route is about being challenged, but it’s also about challenging him. That he’s able to forgive them, that he’s able to question his own survival philosophy and understand theirs, that he’s able to apologize and actually change for the better… that right there is what makes clouis so damn good.
He becomes hardened whereas Clementine softens. By the end of the game, they’re on a similar level now without neglecting their differences, and they can move forward together.
That’s what makes Louis’ route appealing… and it’s also what makes it unappealing to people who prefer Violet.
By contrast, Violet’s already on Clementine’s level when it comes to this perception of survival. She validates that Clementine’s on the right path.
They have other similarities in the way that they’re both female, queer, they both have a kid they look after, they’re not always great with other people, etc.
People who prefer Louis might consider this boring, but I think to Team Violet, it’s comforting. It’s comforting to have a partner who takes this as seriously as you do, who wants to get shit done. They’re playing Clementine with a similar attitude, and don’t believe it needs to be challenged. It’s comforting to feel validated on something you already firmly believe in.
We also see this if we compare the hunting and fishing scenes. You have to make an effort to choose Louis by choosing to neglect hunting, but the game makes you fish with Violet no matter what.
Violet’s prioritizing fishing because they need food. That’s what they’ve set out to do, so let’s do it. The game is letting you know that’s the case, and if you value that, continue pursuing her.
While fishing, they discuss why things are weird with her and Brody. Violet doesn’t take well to Clementine’s blunt, “Because you make it weird. Brody tries and you just make fun of her."
That’s understandable because I think she already kind of knows why and is looking to have her feelings validated. She prefers it when Clementine suggests that it’s because Brody never said sorry for what happened to the twins.
There’s also comfort and validation in the way Violet sides with Clementine and AJ after Marlon’s death. She votes for them to stay, vocalizing how much she disapproves of the results. There’s this feeling that I recognize from a lot of the sapphic romance I read; “it’s you and me against the world, I’ll always have your back, even if you’re in the wrong, I’ll fight for you.”
In our case, it’s violentine + AJ against the rest of Ericson, save Tenn and Aasim. Violet validates that AJ was justified because Marlon was a liar and murderer, claiming that AJ and Clementine did nothing wrong. Violet fights to keep them.
The tension between violentine in ep2 is different because instead of one pushing the other away, they’re being forced apart by the vote and there’s nothing they can do about it. That tension is somewhat released when Clementine comes back and they’re reunited, working out a plan to best defend the school.
It’s also why Violet’s presented as doing something productive when you follow her instead of Louis, and why she asks if you want to hang out after checking the defenses.
All that being said, allow me to reiterate that one is not good and the other bad, they're different. These concepts of challenge and change/validation and comfort exist on a neutral road as diverging paths. It’s up to the player to pick what path they prefer, but that doesn’t mean the other path isn’t worth acknowledging or analyzing.
I should also mention that they’re not exclusive; there is overlap with validation being present in Louis’ route and challenges in Violet’s. They’re just more present in episodes 3 and 4 after we’ve made our decision.
There are several more examples of how this all fits together, buuuuut–
Ya’ll wanna compare some allegories?
Those familiar with my content might already know where I’m going with this as I’ve made a post about Louis and the piano in the past.
You see, I believe that there are allegories for Louis and Violet’s hearts present in their routes: Louis’ piano, and Violet’s pin.
I already have a thorough, in-depth analysis of Louis and the piano that you can read, so all I’ll say about it is that on the night of the raid, he asked Clementine to carve a piece of herself into his heart so that no matter what, their initials will be immortalized together in its wood…
And that makes me fucking feral.
But I'm also so normal about it.
As for Violet, her heart is the star gazing pin she gives to Clementine. She gives it to her so she’ll always remember that night… but she doesn’t give it to her until after Clementine’s saved her, and that fascinates me in the context of it being allegory.
Louis asks Clementine to carve herself into his heart right before the raid, cementing that from that moment on, he is utterly devoted to her. I believe this is part of the reason why Louis is still happy to see her if he’s the one who’s captured. Yes, yes, he’s also incredibly traumatized from having his tongue cut out and he’d be happy to see anyone, yada yada… but listen, if you romance Louis and he’s captured, his heart remains with her—that piano with their intitals is on full display. When he sees her, he’s still so devoted to her that he refuses to accept that it’s at all her fault. Even when she says it is, he shakes his head... and he so easily accepts her when they’re together in the end. From the moment Clementine puts knife to wood, he’s hers.
Now, look… you might think I’m going somewhere not great with this but hear me out.
I think after Clementine’s gone star gazing with her, Violet is fully ready to give her heart to her. Y’know, give her the pin. But, think about what Violet said about how people have left, but Clementine came back. Plus, with the impending raid to think about, maybe Violet should keep the pin until the right moment.
I believe a key difference between her and Louis is that Violet needs one last thing to solidify that Clementine’s the one.
Louis gives her his heart prior to the raid because of everything that’s already gone down between them following Marlon’s death. Violet needs to know that Clementine’s willing to fight for her the way she fought before. When Clementine saves her from the raiders, it’s solidified. Even after she sees Minerva again, it changes nothing.
It’s also worth noting that the pin is something Clementine wears. Like the piano carving, it’s a piece on display for everyone to see, to let them know whose heart Clementine has.
Violet literally handed Clementine her heart as a means of saying, “I’m yours. I’m devoted to you.”
This is why romanced/captured Violet is devastating, and is why she behaves the way she does in the cells. She was so ready to give her heart away and then nope, sorry, Vi! You get knocked unconscious by raiders instead!
If anything, you kind of deserve to be told to fuck off if you romanced her and then let her get captured. Just sayin’.
Look, I have a lot of complicated feelings about the captured violentine route, mostly with Violet being as forgiving as she is after her eyes are burned—yes, yes, I know, her eyes are burned and Minerva messed with her head so of course now she’s not hostile, yada, yada.
But I think it’s rather telling that you don’t get the pin in this route. Sure, Violet’s willing to forgive and possibly pursue this romance in the future… but she’s not ready to hand over her heart, not truly. Not after everything that’s happened.
And if you want to get extra angsty about it, imagine that Violet made the pin right after they parted ways, but before the raiders came. Meaning that if she’s captured, it’s possibly still sitting somewhere, abandoned.
Mmhmmm, very normal about this. I feel normal. My normalness about this continues... normally. I'm not losing my shit thinking about that. Nope. Why would I? I wouldn't! So normal.
Okay just let me talk about their reactions to Tenn's death and then I'll shut up.
This makes me want to gnaw my own foot off, I can barely handle it.
AJ shoots Tenn on the bridge because Clementine trusted him to make the hard calls. This saves Louis or Violet's life.
When Louis jumps across, he's completely silent as he watches Tenn die... and then he's pissed; "What the fuck?! How could you just shoot him like that?!"
AJ explains himself, that he did it for him, and Louis is so upset that he forces AJ to look at what he's done, to watch the walkers eat Tenn; "Tenn's dead. He's dead! Do you realize that?! Look! [...] He's... he's gone, because of you. Just fucking gone."
If Clementine says AJ saved his life, Louis says, "So what, we just cut him loose? Gun him down like he was nothing?"
If Clementine says nothing, Louis says, "Tenn was just a little boy!"
The reason Louis responds this way is because in this moment, he just relived Marlon's death all over again, but worse. So, SO much worse!
When Violet jumps across, she breaks down, begging, "Oh, my God! Oh, my God! No, no! No, no, no..." as she watches Tenn die... and then says to AJ, "No! What the fuck?! How could you do that?!"
AJ explains himself, that he did it for her, and Violet is faaaar from okay; "For me? I can't... Tenn is gone! That soft little boy who liked to draw, he's gone, because of you!"
If Clementine says AJ saved her life, Violet says, "You think that's okay?! Just gunning down one of our own?!"
And there it is.
Louis is hardened in this situation because he already went through this... Violet hasn't, not with AJ. She softened up throughout her route due to her relationships to him and Clementine... but this is the moment where she realizes that maybe AJ wasn't as justified as she believed, and this is the consequence.
This leads us to the ending where AJ asks if they're still mad about him killing Tenn, and I just... I'm biting my foot right now because the script has flipped.
Louis is forgiving and understanding. He's soft, he's sympathetic, he shakes AJ's hand to let him know that all is forgiven and they're okay; "I... AJ, I guess it's like... You saw something I didn't. About the situation, I mean. Minnie and the walkers and Tenn, it's just all this chaos in my head when I think back on it. [...] Clem says you saved my life? Well, then, that's exactly what you did. And how can I stay mad at anyone for doing that?"
Or, alternatively, "He was your friend, AJ. I know you are hurting just as much as I am."
As for Violet? She's understanding, too... but she's not quite ready to forgive yet; "The thing you said on the bridge...that he was messing up all the time. It wasn't something new, you know. Tenn got himself or other people into trouble all the time, long before you guys got here. He was always so lost. He lived in a world that just...isn't there, you know? And that's why I tried to look after him. But when I was pulling him away from the walkers, and Minnie, I could also see...he just wasn't there anymore."
"So you're mad, but sad."
"Can I be that for a while?"
And it's completely understandable that she's hurting and struggling with how she feels about AJ moving forward! She wants to be okay, she wants to forgive him, she just needs time.
Now, because I'm forever bitter, but I'm gonna mention this as well: whenever I see someone point at Violet's scene and say, "See!? This is how LOUIS should've acted in ep2!" like... they're telling on themselves again. Not just that they don't understand Louis as a character or his route, but that they don't fully grasp Violet's part in this either. Or time frames, for that matter.
Let me put it to you in simple terms... they react the same.
After Marlon and Tenn die, they're upset. They're pissed. They blame AJ and yell at him. After they've had time to process what happened [Louis after the two week time skip, Violet after time passes between the bridge and the ending] they share the same, "I'm still upset about Marlon/Tenn. Can I be that for a while and still be your friend?" sentiment.
The difference is that Louis is treated poorly for it because of the vote, and because we feel it first hand for longer... Violet got to grieve off screen and come back after she's sorted herself out.
It's a disservice to both of their characters because it's rooted in that same mentality that I criticized at the beginning: "This is why one is better than the other."
Do I need to say it again? I'm gonna say it again.
One is not good and the other bad. They're different.
There are so many fun discussions that could come from putting Louis and Violet side by side, and examining them. I haven't even covered the different ways they're introduced, or compared their ep3 dates to see what it says about them and the overall narratives! What about the cell scenes!? How they react when Dorian's about the cut off their fingers! The way they approach James upon meeting him!
That last one in particular is especially funny! They're all under stress about blending in with a herd of walkers to infiltrate a boat to save their friends, and yet Louis easily saunters up to the guy wearing walker skins with a smile, and makes him laugh by saying, "Functional and fashionable. I'll take two."
Violet approaches James like he's an injured wild animal that's going to bite her, and bless her heart, she tries with, "I, uh… hey. Hey there, James. Sorry about Willy." Then James gives her this judgmental side-eye, like buddy? She's not the weirdo here.
There is so much potential to dissect here, and I want to see people do it... but I want them to do it fairly, in good faith.
I want to get away from the idea of comparing them to "prove" which is better because there is no objective better. There isn't! That's a waste of time!
I'm so done with The Debate™; it's unhelpful, it's annoying, and it's boring as shit. I've heard it all before, and you probably have, too.
I want to put Louis and Violet under a microscope and study them with the thought process of, "one does this and the other does that... what does it mean!? what does it say about the narrative!? Oh my god, they have the same opinion on this thing, WRITE THAT DOWN!"
So yeah, that's my ramble for the night.
I'm gonna go replay TFS for further research.
#twdg#twdg clementine#twdg louis#twdg violet#twdg aj#twdg tenn#twdg marlon#twdg minerva#twdg clouis#twdg violentine#clouis#violentine#i'll be real honest with you--i had a larger essay planned on this topic#that expanded on these ideas i've put forth here; especially the challenge vs validation thing and the allegories#but there were some parts where i could feel my personal bias slipping in too much...#like i had more to say about clouis than violentine at points because i'm more familiar with it#but then it didn't feel fair y'know? that's why i wish more people would talk about them like this#so that i could get different perspectives without having to deal with terrible 'one good one bad' arguments like they're so UNHELPFUL#i don't wanna hear about how much of a bitch you think vi is because she's angry in her cell scene#and i don't wanna hear about how 'well ACTUALLY it doesn't make sense that ANY clementine would romance louis because of the vote' STOP#to be fair tumblr isn't as bad with this. i'm mostly referring to fandom spaces outside of tumblr like reddit insta youtube etc#though tumblr certainly has had its moments#i dunno i'm just gonna throw this out there and then continue to work on the essay i want to and am able to fully write#and if people want to engage with it then fantastic can't wait to see what y'all have to say
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I’ve been thinking a lot lately about Gideon’s blood and the Tomb. I’ve got two points here that dovetail somewhat…
Let’s review some key events. I realize these probably seem a bit all over the place, but I do believe they come together. I’ve tried to put these in roughly chronological order.
John attempts to consume the soul of the Earth, and then creates a physical body for Alecto: “I ripped half my ribs from my body and made you from the dirt, my blood, my vomit, my bone.”
Ten thousand years later, Gideon and Harrow duke it out. The initial recollection of the fight says that “Harrow had scratched until she’d had half of Gideon’s face beneath her fingernails.” The more candid HtN version has Gideon telling us, “You clawed my face so bad that my blood ran down your hands; my face was under your fucking fingernails.”
Harrow opens the Tomb with Gideon’s (read: John’s) blood on her hands.
Harrow sees Alecto, falls in love with her, and decides to live.
At some point while in the Tomb, Harrow apparently kisses Alecto: “She hadn’t come on purpose; the scrap of black-eyed meat had asked for it—the chain of a kiss: the ice that burnt the flesh of the mouth that had stuck to the mouth that was frozen.”
At Canaan House, Ianthe ascends and tells the others that step six of the process is to “consume the flesh. Not the whole thing, a drop of blood will do to ground you.”
Harrow’s letter tells her she owes Ianthe “the favour of the chain”, which extends “into the House, but NOT into the Tomb.” The agreement takes precedence over any oaths sworn to others, including John, except for the Holy Corpse.
Harrow kisses Ianthe to inspect her jaw and re-swears the oath.
Harrow’s Nova AU has her retrieving the chain of Samael from the Anastasian. This is considered a sin severe enough that the Reverend Father whips her, but she is allowed to keep the chain. Denied the role of Reverend Daughter, Harrow tells Ortus that she is “the unfulfilled vow and the bloody teeth of the unkissed skull.”
Alecto kisses Harrow, bites her, and recognizes her by her blood - the blood of Anastasia’s line. Alecto tells Harrow that she is very sorry about Samael, and she vows the favour she had promised to Anastasia to Harrow.
We see over and over this theme of consuming another life, whether body or soul: we get two sides of this coin when we compare Gideon’s “All I ever wanted you to do was eat me” to John’s statement that “it’s the human instinct, to take.” Consuming the flesh is, per Ianthe, one of the steps to taking in a cavalier’s soul and becoming a Lyctor, directly paralleling John consuming the Earth, both physically when he eats dirt and spiritually when he takes in her soul. Thus far, though, we don’t know how or if Harrow consumed Gideon’s flesh in the interim between chapters 36 and 37 of GtN.
But here’s what I’ve been wondering: assuming Ianthe is correct (and telling the truth) about the steps to becoming a Lyctor, to what extent does the order and timing actually matter? I think there’s a distinct possibility that Harrow had consumed Gideon’s flesh years before they even came to Canaan House.
Because Harrow had Gideon’s face under her fingernails. And Harrow bites her nails.
HtN, chapter four:
You held your left hand up before your face, before the light, the even white light with its hot tungsten filaments. The thumbnail was whole and even. Too even? Were you wont to chew your fingernails still, that unattractive tic of your girlhood?
And again in chapter twenty-one:
She took off her gloves, and with the edges of her fingernails - bitten to the quick, and never much help - she started to prise open one wrinkled corner.
If the steps do not have to be completed strictly in order, Harrow may very well have already checked off step six if she were biting her nails with Gideon’s flesh and blood still clinging to them.
The other thing going on here is that we get these repeated connections between chains and favours and kisses. I don’t feel like we have quite all the pieces yet to draw any definitive conclusions, but it seems that the favour of the chain may have something to do with the Reverend Family’s vow to protect the Tomb. Particularly, Harrow describing herself, sans Reverend Daughter title, as “the unfulfilled vow” as she wields the chain of Samael lends itself to this interpretation. I also find it very interesting that this unfulfilled vow is paired with “the bloody teeth of the unkissed skull” given that upon waking, Alecto kisses Harrow, bites her, and draws blood which then allows her to recognize Harrow as one of Anastasia’s descendants.
Before that kiss, though, there was another. Alecto describes being called back by Harrow’s kiss, presumably when she broke into the Tomb as a child. I have to wonder if blood was playing a role here too. Alecto says that Harrow’s flesh stuck on her frozen lips, that the ice burned her. If this kiss also drew blood, it could be that the blood of Anastasia’s line was the key to calling her back. However, there may have been someone else’s blood on Alecto’s lips that day. If Harrow had been biting her nails, which she’d earlier used to claw Gideon’s face, she very well may have had Gideon’s blood in her mouth as well. As John’s daughter, her blood was able to open the Tomb. Was it able to call Alecto as well? Could “the chain of a kiss” be referring to Harrow transferring John’s blood between Gideon and Alecto?
Overall, it seems like we’re circling something akin to a blood oath or living blood ward. The thalergetic nature of blood certainly aligns with the symbolism of life and light that we see connected to the Earth and Alecto, in contrast to the thanergy that John cultivates. Alecto’s physical form is derived from John’s blood, and his power is derived from her soul. If indeed a kiss and a few drops of John’s blood, shepherded into the Tomb by Gideon and Harrow, are enough to call Alecto, I cannot even imagine the pyrotechnics show that we’re in for now that he’s had a run-in with the business end of her sword.
#i've had the nail biting = step six thing percolating since pre-nona days#but the chain of a kiss part didn't hit me until the other day#at which point i quite literally froze in my tracks to process#i can't really blame harrow though. breaking into an apocalypse-initiating tomb would be a real nail-biter#(sorry i just think puns are funny automatically)#i do think there's a good chance they were already partway to lyctorhood by the time they got to the First#pre-lyctors. if you will.#nona the ninth spoilers#ntn#harrowhark nonagesimus#john gaius#gideon nav#alecto#alecto the ninth#the locked tomb#tlt#tlt meta
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something that always gets me about klavier is that he is so clearly just like. friendly. he cares so much and he cares too much. he's one to tease simultaneously but he so clearly just like. loves and loves and loves, even when it puts him in harm's way, he likes people and he likes being around people enough to be desperate for it and for friendship like. ough
#goober.txt#klavier gavin#kristoph gavin#aa4#this is also partially why I am such a truther of nuance in klavier+kris's relationship#I think it mixes well with prev just in like. how much he cares is both part of his core and a byproduct of#being desperate for all the connection he lost + that was plenty dysfunctional on top of that (but all he had)#I think it actively hits harder if he's conflicted for missing someone who was terrible because it was still his brother and like.#I think kris having been good to klavier sometimes (adding to the dysfunction of the bad) is something that I've always liked#because like#I think klavier having a 'is it wrong to want him dead' and 'am I terrible for missing him badly' thing happenin at the same time is!!#so good and also very sad and I love you gavin brother things that capcom didn't give us. love you klavier gavin#I like the idea of him having that confliction alongside his grief :( ow#I literally don't have the right words to properly express all my thought cereal on this. other people have done it though so it is ok haha#I love when fictional grief has the confliction of 'being reminded the monster was also human and that makes everything worse' it's so good#like I hate you. I miss you. the way you were nice to me was so very you and it makes me soft and sad and tired. I miss you.#you were awful in unspeakable ways. I miss you.#sometimes I wonder what my life would have been like without you and it comforts me as much as it terrifies me. I miss you
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just a song before i go
a lesson to be learned
traveling twice the speed of sound
it's easy to get burned
i wouldn't exactly call Ellie a ladykiller, but there are multiple women she's loved throughout her career where things just didn't or couldn't work out...
bonus: the ones who did;
#ffxiv#final fantasy xiv#ffxiv screenshots#ffxiv gpose#femroe#wolship#minfilia warde#ysayle dangoulain#lyse hext#ffxiv zero#if this were a tv series ellie would be the kind of protagonist that gets a new girl every season >.>#lyse and zero might still be possible though. now that she's realized she's poly at least. if they weren't both busy offscreen. :')#also “it's easy to get burned” but tbh they all part on good terms (or...are cut short by. dying) so really she could be doing *worse*#for reference mia happens right after defeating hades. they continue to not actually talk about their feelings for a few months after.#bc mia is processing having been persephone to hades but she takes solace in finally acknowledging what she and ellie have had for years#lily happens a few months after endwalker; she needed to go on a good ol journey of self-discovery and move on from past heartbreaks#so she could have the courage to confess to ellie and mia and activate their polyamory realizations
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i'm still stuck on the purgatories so here's a list of purgatory 2 moments simply off the top of my head that deserve to be remembered:
aimsey ducking all of axolotl team alone in a cave with literally half a heart
goose gang fucking descending on the raccoon base and absolutely wrecking shop
ethan crankgameplays clutching up for team panda during the capture the flag game by being the only one hanging out in the center and periodically checking the chests, earning them a shitton of flags and clutching multiple rounds
crow team's egg taking 0 damage
pac doxxing goose gang's egg in the last second
shelby shubble as the last member of her team online writing a letter to aimsey and sharing the world's most devastating ten minutes before her team was eliminated with one of the eye creatures (coco? i forgot lol)
badboyhalo absolutely fucking DEMOLISHING the battleship event on like 2 hours of sleep and a dream
wuant(?) stealing a tv from the battleship event and then playing portuguese ice age on it for the crows lmfao
tubbo djing for his team while waiting for the time for a goose gambit
theguill CRASHING THROUGH THE FUCKING CEILING of the raccoon team's hidey hole like the fucking kool aid man in a last effort to save his team and 4v1 or 5v1 ing team raccoon; he lost but that was such an epic fucking moment
theguill and etoiles pvping and each hyping the other's skills the entire time
seapeekay escaping cellbit and baghera and then stealing their boats and rocketing past to tease them about it; that shit was iconic
kenny going mad with power collecting sand on literally day 1
the english speaking squirrels taking actual physical notes on portuguese phrases (i think)
lgbtiba
i may add more this is an off the top of my head list but like got DAMN i like these events :D i like them a lot
#qsmp#qsmp purgatory 2#qpurgatory 2#there hope those filter for u fuckers#(/affectionate)#shut up vic#block game brainrot#if you can't tell my povs went something like this:#crab -> raccoon -> panda -> capybara -> goose -> crow#so i didn't watch all of them lmfao#i only spent a few hours with raccoon and crab; panda i caught all of#capybara and goose i mostly watched on their elimination day#crow i hopped into on the final day as well tho i'd been keeping some tabs on them previously#just not concentrated watching#i like purgatories :D#to be clear though i hope they don't run purg 3 until like november 2024 at the absolute EARLIEST#the staff is NOT at the point they can handle it yet lol not for a while#the fact that one of the ex devs said they were already talking about purg 3 was crazy#like i'm patient i'm not nuts let's cook this one#this is neglecting to mention the post-server close calls which are my favorite part of the event no contest#oh yeah and i also have issues w how some of the special events work#those need some tweaking it's not perfect by any stretch of the imagination#but i enjoy it :) it has good moments
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reading all about the white calf, love your work, can i just say. gonna put some hibrides appreciation out there because damn. nobody in this story is lucky but she in particular seems to be having a Bad Time
Yeah a lot of things suck pretty bad for her. Unwittingly in a lavender marriage, mutual dislike between her and her dogshit husband, extremely strained relationship to her former best friend/gay quasi-boyfriend/father of her children who alternates between avoiding her and desperate attempts to make her love him again, having to constantly maintain multiple levels of facade to socially protect their throuple and therefore herself, shy and socially isolated, dealing with trauma that she doesn't even begin to recognize as such because 'nothing bad actually happened', pretty sure something is deeply wrong with her, living under a damocles sword of catastrophic social consequences should her children be exposed as bastards, has discovered an unexpected and mostly unwanted pregnancy while on a months long cross-country trek, etc.
She's also someone who prides herself in being rational, put together, stoic against adversity, and not overly emotional and weak, which basically means all of this is getting suppressed and compartmentalized away like crazy.
She HAS managed to fall into a rhythm with it all and her life IS NOT constant misery and agony. But the situation she's in for the duration of the story completely tears her out of this rhythm and makes all these factors very acute (though also opens her up to new opportunities, new and more positive/differently complex relationships, and much bigger things to worry about than her domestic life).
Unrelated drawing of her struggling not to lose her shit in public (in this case trying not to laugh)
#She does have some things going for her. Biggest one being that she is immensely class privileged and doesn't have to experience#hardships that the majority of the population do (like hard labor for basic subsistence. Malnutrition. Constant lice infestations. Etc)#She also had a pretty damn good childhood and a loving and supportive family. Her parents were an example of an arranged#marriage going well and turning into a genuine companionship. Her mother was a pretty good role model and did her#best to prepare her for the inevitable 'leaving her family at 15 to marry an older man she barely knew'. Which did kind of help#though her advice of staying strong and toughing the transition out (because things will get better eventually if you do) backfired a bit.#Dad saw to her getting a very good education and allowed her to pursue interests that wouldn't usually be a part of a girl's schooling#(namely politics. which becomes relevant)#Her paternal uncle absolutely adored her and is the one who got her into poetry and would have books delivered to her even after#she was married and moved away.
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played dragon age 2...just simple scribbles
#dragon age tag#i doubt that will see much use again..but who knows. vvv rambling below#weird game..the characters dialogue stuff and ending were good tho :')#i've played some of the first game but it kept crashing. i knew already despite knowing nothing that this guy was going to be my type#it doesnt feel right making video game art any more bc games like this end up feeling really personal - an experience that happened to me#if i design the main character a bit and fall in love then..that happened to me..i can't make Fan Art of that..only ive been through that..#like i cant make fanart of my dear companions in bg3 despite it having been a huge part of my heart in the last year#almost 1000 hours of playtime in something i can barely talk about bc it means too much.... lol#tons of ideas and conversations and extra thoughts and scenes and emotions about all the incredible times i've been through in bg3#and the maelstrom just rotates around intensely in my own heart forever...but that's ok too...that is so precious to me#but fortunately i already knew people that have played this game and talked/drew abt it recently so it was saved from that for me#sharing scribbly fanart on my Blog is a way to capture the feeling just after experiencing something so it has good points#witch hat atelier escapes that by not being a GAME. games are so immersive. but my wha art & feelings are incredibly immersive too#which makes it difficult sometimes now. i live a complicated and emotional life <3 i am not suited to fandom <3#my character ended up looking so much like oru without me realising that's what i was doing. Kind bearded fireball throwing gay mage. Hmm.#falling for a sad white hair memory trauma fellow that keeps you at a tragic distance. Hmmmmmm.#i see also how very much bg3 is inspired by stuff like dragon age now lol so i'm glad i experienced it. I WANT MY KIRKWALL LIFE BACK...#so dated though as well and unpleasant at times (the city and the dismal atmosphere was depressing.) i hate violence/horror..#bg3 is SOOOO very dismal but it feels like I am killing people and going through horrors because i have to survive i have to be free#Well anyway. ahh it's so refreshing to fall in love. my gay journey continues...
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Hello! I hope I won't sour your mood with this ask but I have been thinking a lot about your gay dogs this month especially.
I'll just try to keep the context short but in general I'm someone that has accepted being romantically undesireable. It was hard but in the end I have built my life just around me, my humble family and at this point in time I don't even think I have the time for a partner. And considering that it's the love month and a lot of people are preparing to celebrate it with their SOs I assumed that, actually, this is a thing that I sort of have in common with Machete.
From the miscellaneous lore on your profile I see Machete as someone that also has kind of rejected love. That also has built his life around his job, possibly hobbies, his family or mentors (depending if we're talking about canon or modern au). Who kind of forgot that relationships are a thing and that people bond with others in that way. Well, at least he did until meeting Vasco.
I just love thinking about their awkward beginnings. Machete being 100% sure that Vasco is just joking, maybe even sometimes teasing him (in a friendly banter type way) or just explaining to himself that all that kindness and interest is just him being a very considerate friend. And then we have Vasco that just tries to be subtle, as if he was trying to pass a fawn without it noticing and running away, but also with time gains confidence and tries more risque moves. Vasco being all smug and Machete being flustered when their hands or shoulders or tails brush in passing. And then when both are sure of their feelings we have Machete who has to choose between God and his love. Who, at first, unwillingly accepts that divine wrath will be worth their brief love.
I just love your boys. I swear they are all the love supply one might possibly need
Thank you for such a long and thoughtful message! I don't know why you thought you might accidentally sour my mood, I'm utterly delighted whenever I hear that someone has been pondering my little guys (rotating them in their head, as they say), and when they go through the trouble of sharing their findings and conclusions I'm so happy I could crawl up a wall.
I think you deciphered Machete's inner workings very well, especially those of the original canon version. The concept of love is of course prominent in Christianity, so even as a kid being raised in a religious environment that discouraged overt displays of affection and close personal bonds, Machete wasn't completely alienated from it. But it has always been a nebulous, unperceivable and unattainable thing for him. When he was old enough to lock down his career choice he readily accepted he'd never have romantic relationships, spouse or a family, and I think he must've been too young and socially inexperienced to think of it as a significant loss. Either he consciously blocked out the need for companionship by studying and working like his life depended on it, or he didn't really consider that being genuinely befriended, appreciated and loved as a person instead of a respectable and competent authority figure was even an option for him, at least not until Vasco came along.
#I think it took some time to get through his initial defences#especially since when they first met the stressful apprenticeship period was still fresh in Machete's mind#the years under his explosive and gaslighting mentor's wing had made him very distrustful so he preferred to just stick to himself#Vasco is good at winning people over and once he convinced him that he didn't have any ulterior motives they became besties pretty quickly#and even though the line between platonic and romantic started gradually blurring Machete kept convincing himself#that his feelings for Vasco were just Very Deep Friendship#and Vasco has an eye for noticing these things and a bolder personality#so when he tried to reciprocate a little bit Machete thought 'what a good friend he is'#'so kind and considerate and I'm so grateful and lucky to have him and I must not ruin things by getting too personal'#it was awkward and at times a little bit painful but I'd like to believe the progression was for the most part smooth and natural#considering the circumstances it could've been a lot more distressing#as corny as it is I think they were just happy to have found each other#they advanced at the same phase and reached the 'I think we've become a couple actually' stage at the same time#at least that's how I imagine it at the moment#answered#anonymous#Vaschete lore#long post
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juvie buddies
#alek art#td duncan#td mal#total drama#total drama all stars#(if i want to get technical)#2024#duncan is around 15 here... mal is around 16#ive thought really hard about them these past few days . in my brain they actually knew each other and canon is different#duncan and mike got along really well. in juvie mal refused to speak to anyone about anything and would fight as many people as he could .#he wanted to stay in there and far away from home . they get roomed together and duncan is the first person who mal can talk to . he isnt#scared of him . he relates to him a lot . like -> wow we both act out for attention and people think we are terrible because of it#duncan being a mentally ill teenager seeing mal an also very mentally ill teenager thought 'i can fix him' . mike and duncan speak too here#i cant really see anyone else fronting besides those two . their brain was on lockdown and mike wanted out so bad . i see manitoba as a#gatekeeper so hed handle some sessions with their psych. i want to say they (duncan and mike) get moved to a psyche ward just because#i have more knowledge on being in one and how it goes ... but yeah i like duncan mal a lot . this art isnt ship whatsoever though 🙏 i dont#see them as a couple their dynamic is just better as friends imo#but anyways in all stars they obviously recognize each other but have an unspoken agreement not to say anything abt it#duncan is a known criminal but mike isnt like that . mike hadnt even told zoey about that part of his life . so duncan wanted to respect his#privacy -> then mal starts hurting people and he has to step in . mal isnt a good person by any means but i dont think he was that bad in#juvie . so duncan had to come to terms that his friend wasnt the same person he was years ago (in all stars duncan is ~18 and i think mike#is almost 20... so it had been a while since they last talked)#them getting each other like no other and being in pain because they couldnt really speak . i see them having a conversation still in moon#madness abt their past and history . god i just think abt them and their wasted potential wdym mike and duncan were in juvie together#duncan was in for trespassing or destruction of private property or something really dumb . mal fought his parent(s) and got in for assault#mal was already in when duncan was placed . and duncan was let out early on good behavior + his parents (dad) mostly did it to teach him a#lesson . wrong of them or otherwise . so mal was just kinda stuck there until they realized he was actually not right in the head . think he#knew abt their DID but was only diagnosed in juvie and had to go from there . tbh he shouldve been tried as an adult but td logic . doesnt#matter dw guys . mike gets the 'was put on random meds that made him go braindead' treatment bc that was me . post mental hospital abilify#had me messed up
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i've seen "valgrace with werewolf!Jason", and i've seen the "Leo with mechanical prosthetic arms/legs" headcanons
but what if... what if we did both
#those are two ideas i've been obsessing about lately#and i just realised the potential of merging them together#do you see???#feral beast boy and robot cyborg boy#animal v mechanical#both technically opposites of each other#but both having very similar struggles? like#both having to deal with major changes imposed onto their bodies#and both are struggling with loosing parts of themselves -> they both feel like they are a lesser/worse version of what they were before#even though they don't see it in the other / they both think the other one is just as good aa they were before#and they eventually help each other come to terms with their new bodies#do you SEE my VISION#the mutual understanding#the support through grieving a previous version of themselves that will never come back#i wish someone would write this (because i sadly CANNOT write)#valgrace#pjo#pjo headcanon#hoo#valgrace headcanon#hoo headcanon#pjo prompt#valgrace prompt#jason grace#leo valdez
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Had a really interesting moment at work earlier this week. I was making myself a cup of tea when I suddenly heard from behind me, "Amy!" I turned around and saw three of my colleagues congregating in one colleague's office with the door open. The colleague whose office it was gestured to me to come over, and then said six words that nearly stopped me cold: "We were just whispering about you."
I say it stopped me cold because I have far too many memories of bullies calling my name in the hallway in high school, and never for a good reason. What made it worse was when I could tell that they had just been whispering about me--again, not for a good reason--and started giggling as I approached. But I went over anyway, because I never felt like I couldn't go over to them, even as the knot of dread in the pit of my stomach steadily grew larger. In this case, though, those six words were immediately followed by, "We love your shoes! We were just over here admiring them and how well you match" (as I was wearing teal-colored heels that happened to coordinate with a sweater of a nearly identical color I had on).
I still don't think I managed to relax from that instinctive freezing feeling until my mind and body had fully processed the interaction afterward, but at least it all worked out well...
#autism#bullying#thoughts#this is not to say that bullying doesn't happen in the workplace of course#but i am grateful that i have about 1000x more confidence now than i did in high school#it really is something though how things that happen when you're in school become such a part of who you are#for good or for bad#even the way they were sitting together reminded me of a high school clique#and i have never felt comfortable with those#fun times at the work Keurig machine#personal post
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