#their WHOLE LIVES
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If dazai and chuuya ever try to have a normal conventional happy life i feel that it would just end up like that one episode of it's always sunny in philly where Mac and Dennis move to the suburbs
#bsd#they cant be normal sorry#like putting two feral wild animals in a spa#chuuya is walking around in circles and dazai is plucking his hair out of stress and lack of stimulation these are not the right conditions#thats NOT their natural habitat#bungou stray dogs#bsd dazai#dazai osamu#bsd dazai osamu#bsd chuuya nakahara#bsd chuuya#chuuya nakahara#nakahara chuuya bsd#bsd nakahara chuuya#soukoku#bsd soukoku#skk#dennis is chuuya and dazai is mac#they switch depending on the scene#im not saying they cannot have a normal life its just this mf have been in the mafia or in some kind of gang kind of shit organisation#their WHOLE LIVES
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My friends who have never experienced flooding, and who are about to deal with it from this storm, please remember:
1. NO. YOU CANNOT MAKE IT THROUGH THAT WATER ON THE ROAD. I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU'RE DRIVING. TURN. AROUND.
2. DO NOT GO WADING THROUGH THE WATER. EVEN IF YOU JUST WANT TO SEE HOW DEEP IT IS. THAT. WATER. IS. CONTAMINATED.
3. IT IS CALLED FLASH FLOODING FOR A REASON. THE WATER RISES AND SURGES IN A FLASH. STAY. HOME.
4. If you're at risk of flooding, raise up any of your belongings now. Put the legs of tall things in buckets. Know where your important documents are.
5. Stay safe.
#not sca related#I have lived with Hurricanes and Tropical Storms my whole life and I am experienced with storm flooding#please listen to the voice of experience#I want you to stay safe#SCA Mom#SCA Aunt
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"you're the writer, you control how the story goes" no not really. i wrote the first sentence and then my characters said "WE WILL TAKE IT FROM HERE" and promptly swerved into an electrical fence.
#now im watching their whole lives fall apart on google docs#i dont know whats happening but by god im excited to see where it goes next#writers on tumblr#writerscommunity#writeblr#writing#bookblr#creative writing#writing life#writers and poets#novel writing#my characters#original characters#writing stuff#fanfiction#darkacademia
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bad dating stories time: the shoe incident
so in highschool, my best friend wasnt allowed to go on dates unless there was another couple there to keep an eye on him. part of this was his parents being insane, but also, part of it was him being insane. in a problem with no reasonable parties, there are no reasonable solutions.
at some point in my junior year, my sorta-gf broke up with me, and i just wasnt feeling dating, which was bad for my friend, because he had a good thing going with a girl he met in court.
he kind of hounded me about it. kept pushing me to just put me feet back in the dating pool and i wasnt real thrilled about it, because i knew he was pushing me for his own benefit, not mine, so i kept telling him to fuck off, and after a few weeks of being told that i would date when i was damn well ready, he eventually said: okay. what if i paid for the date AND found you a blind date AND all you had to do was show up?
and i shouldve said no, i know, but i let him wear me down, and i will own my fault in that. a date starting on such a stupid premise could never have gone well.
but he still managed to find a way to make it worse.
i dont know how long he tried to set a blind date up. it couldve been multiple attempts. he couldve stooped to this immediately. but what happened in the end was that he called a girl from the ward he attended - a girl that he knew had a giant, mushy crush on him - and he said: hey! how would you feel about going on a date this weekend?
(you know, implying it was with him, but never actually saying it.)
and she said YES WOW I WOULD LOVE TO and he said great! and then he called me up and said he found me a date.
i did not learn about his crimes until several weeks later. i will die swearing before god almighty that i would never have allowed this travesty to happen if i had known.
that was on a monday. the date of the date rolled around that friday evening, and im sorry to confess, i really phoned the whole thing in. i showed up in my favorite comfy outfit, which was also a fashion crime: basketball shorts and flipflops and a baja hoodie. it was super comfy but it made me look kind of crazy. i picked him up first, and then i picked up his date next, and then we went to pick up my date, and thats where you're gonna get the play by play.
i arrived, walked across the yard, and knocked on the front door. she opened it almost immediately, like shed been waiting right by it, and i could see her expression go from OMG IM SO EXCITED to super disappointed, then disgusted and finally pissed. and because i didn't know about my friends sins, i thought it was from my outfit. which seemed... harsh. like, hey, im allowed to be quirky, fuck you. also its a blind date, i thought the deal was that we were both going to be sad broken sacks of mortality.
anyway, we looked at each other for several seconds before she slammed the door in my face.
i looked back at my friend. he was sweating bullets. i dont know what he expected from this, but there was this big long pause where we both tried to figure out what to do, and then the door opened up, and her dad invited me in, and he said she was gonna need a few minutes to finish getting ready, and that in the meantime we could sit and talk.
we did not talk. we did sit. i sat down on the couch, and he sat down in a chair across the couch, and then instead of talking he cleaned his pistol on the coffee table. i wasnt actually sure if it was a threat, or if it was just a fidget thing for 40+ year old republican men, but when i tried to help he got snappy so i just watched him put a pistol back together.
he was okay at it.
eventually my date came downstairs, still mad as hell for reasons beyond my ken, and i felt pretty guilty for being such a mess because i thought that was why she was so angry. i tried to make up for by walking her to the car and getting the door for her, just generally trying to be extra polite, but before i could make it back to the drivers side, her dad called me back to the door. so i flipped around, went to the door, and immediately regreted my decision.
soon as i was within range, her dad got waaaay too close to me, leaned in, and said "whatever you do to her, i will do to you," and my brain went into overdrive making three consecutive realizations.
realization one was, damn, the pistol thing was a threat. that sucks. what an asshole. realization two was, wait, im autistic and even i know theres a 0% chance me and my date even hold hands, least of all boink. does this guy actually think there's even a 1% chance of anyone in that car getting laid tonight? is he an idiot? and then realization three went through, which was wait, is this guy threatening to fuck me? and unfortunately, with my brain doing so much processing, my mouth was left to run amok, so somewhere between realization 2 and 3, i said:
"i can't get pregnant"
which, i swear, wasn't actually me trying to be a smartass, it was just me pointing out that he couldn't actually follow up on that threat. it just wasn't possible. we do not live in the omegaverse and im not scared of you.
still, it was an insanely catastrophic thing to say, and the moment we both heard it, we bluescreened. that single sentence obliterated both of our momentary streams of consciousness like a saltine in front of a sand blaster. problem was, he'd probably gone his whole life not even realizing someone could say something that stupid, and making that realization was going to cost him a lot of thinking time. me though? i had been saying shit like that for 17 years, i didnt have to rewrite my expectations of human nature, i just had to plan an exit and start striding. so i was already halfway back to the car before i heard "hey. hey come back. Hey. Hey. HEY. HEY WAIT. HEY GET BACK HERE. HEY-"
and then i was in my car, and i drove away.
if this happened today, he'd have called her, and the whole thing wouldve imploded then and there, but back then, there were still a decent number of teenagers without cell phones. especially the teenagers of insane, gun toting parents. so she just said: whoa what was that all about? and i said: dont worry about it, he'll tell you about it when you get home.
and she said: ok and went back to staring daggers at me and my friend.
WHICH SURPRISINGLY isnt even how the story ends.
we went to an improv comedy show, and it was a disaster. it shouldve been like, 7/10 tops, but between my date being mad, and my friend having a good time, and me having the existential terror of knowing that a guy with a pistol was probably waiting outside his house for me to come back, it was easily 11/10. i laughed way too hard at everything. especially the jokes that flopped. id sit there in this mostly silent room and laugh until i dry heaved a little, and my date was absolutely disgusted, and even my friend was a little embarrassed, which would just make me laugh harder. i laughed so hard that night i could barely talk the next day. and then the show ended, and my friend said, you know, that was a good time, but i think we should maybe do something a little chiller? who wants to walk around the park? and his date said yeah, and my date said no, and i finally had mercy on the poor woman so i said, look, im gonna drop you off. and i am so, so sorry about this, but im dropping you off like a block away. super duper sorry.
do talk to your dad about the pistols thing if you dont want this happening more in the future tho.
and she said: okay. so i dropped her off, and she walked a block down, and that was that.
then i drove my friend and his date to a park that was good for wandering. i figured they wanted something more private, so instead of following them around point blank, i chose a park with this 30 foot rope tower, and i climbed to the top and i said: hey i can see you anywhere from up here, you are officially chaperoned from a distance. get panopticoned idiot. except my friend really is an idiot, and he didnt really get the whole 'now i dont have to third wheel so insanely hard with you guys' thing so he climbed up the tower too, and then his date followed behind him, so there are three people basically sitting together on top of a telephone pole.
and then they started making out.
i was close enough to hear it.
i didnt really know what to do so i was just kind of sitting there, dissociating, when some college kids came around and started shaking the tower. my friend's date went aaaaaaaaaa im afraid of heights :( and my friend went oh, dont worry, ill hold you tight ;) and i went hey, im gonna climb down and ask them to stop.
so i did climb down, and i did ask them to stop, and they flipped me off, which i wasnt even mad about. at that point i was i was like yeah, it would be weirder if this wasnt a mess. gods plan has been to fly this day like a 747 into my metaphorical twin towers and brother he is close enough for me to see him grinning through the cockpit window. still, eventually the college students got bored, so they climbed up the tower, which gave my friend and his date a window to climb down, and together we walked back to my car.
now, i cant explain why this is, but sitting back in the drivers seat was my carriage-back-into-a-pumpkin moment. i'd been chill about all the chaos, just rolling with the punches, but sitting down made me realize how much of a shitshow the day had been, and while i couldnt go back and fix all of it, i could go back and fix one thing.
so i told my friend and his date, hey, you two, stay here and don't do anything weird. don't. then i walked back to the rope tower, and i started picking up the shoes the college students had left at the base in order to climb.
about halfway through this, i realized that if i took all their shoes, they might think i was in it for the money, and i actually wanted them to know i was in it specifically to spite them. fuck those guys. so i put all the right shoes back, gave myself a 100 foot headstart, yelled "nice shoes, assholes", did a little jig, and started running.
my advice to everyone is that college students are faster than you think. even with the headstart, and the whole climb down the tower thing, i was still only fivish seconds ahead of them by the time i got to my car. i flung the door open, looked in the backseat, didnt see anyone, flung the stolen shoes in the backseat, heard two "ow"s, took that as proof of presence, jumped in and pealed out of the lot.
my friend and his date popped up a few seconds later. they were, uh, doing something weird in the back seat. my one request - obliterated.
they climbed up to ask where the hell all the shoes had come from, and i was like yeah i stole them from the college students, and they were like oh. cool. hope you had fun. and i was like, i did. i did. but speaking of fun, what were you doing back there?
and for the first time in my buddies life, i think he was actually embarassed.
#dating stories#anecdotes#long post#funny story#babylon#im really bad at dating#like i can do a lot better than this but also it just was kind of a nightmare for me#shit like this did make the whole thing easier tho#like#every date after this i could go you know ive seen how bad it can get#and i lived#didnt even get shot#writing
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people who for very silly reasons want to market prepared food products without preservatives in them who then discover why we started putting preservatives in prepared food products in the first place (because without a preservation method food quickly grows stale, and frequently also moldy or downright toxic) is a consistently good bit. like people really seem to think we put Evil Chemicals in food on purpose for no reason.
#better living through chemistry#it's not just the wellness industry#the whole wellness weltanschauung is a scam
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Let the poor man rest.
#also no he doesn't want to experience life as a normal person. no he wouldn't sacrifice his powers to live again.#he LOVED being powerful. he was very proud of his powers. he was at the top of the world. what he disliked was being so lonely at the top.#which having reunited with Geto now he is not.#and he wanted to keep the next generation safe due to his past regrets and teach a generation of kids to be at the top together.#and he wanted to get rid of the corrupt higher-ups and reform the Jujutsu society.#and he did all of that. Yuta and Yuuji are both alive and safe and the kids are all reunited with each other stronger than ever#and the higher-ups are d**d.#Gojo obviously wouldn't hate to keep living. he clearly didn't expect to lose and die. but as he himself confirmed#he died doing what he loved. he went out the way he wanted. he went out with a bang. he had the best fight of his life and gave it his all.#as he said 'he had fun'. he said it would have been embarrassing if he died of old age or sickness.#and now that he's gone he's happy with his friends and especially Geto. he found peace.#He said it himself 'Now i'm wishing that it's not just a dream'.#also for those of you who say that Geto & Gojo wouldn't be together because one would go to hell and one to heaven... no. just no.#first of all. Gojo did a mass m*r*** before his death#second of all. they're Buddhists. they don't have heaven and hell. don't bring Abrahamic religions into everything.#and you'd be surprised by the excuses the Abrahamic religions find to not let people in heaven.#probably Gojo wouldn't go to heaven even if he didn't kill the higher-ups due to...idk... occasionaly doing pranks or sth.#but Gege apparently created a whole other afterlife of his own. and Toji Geto Gojo Nanami and everyone were all gathered there together.#you SAW that. so stop.#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#gojo satoru#satoru gojo#jjk gojo#gege akutami#my two cents#satosugu
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for ages i thought i didnt like drag because of internalized homophobia but it turned out i just don't like bright lights and loud music and really visually complicated things
spd is homophobic i guess is what im saying
#i fucking hate live shows of any sort#every time my dad dragged me to one as a little kid i was miserable the whole time#i like to consume things from a tiny rectangle on my computer screen and nothing bigger than that
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i just rediscovered the pelican spider. give me 1-2 business days to stop laughing at how they're shaped and ill be normal again
#i have a skewed perspective on what makes a creature weird looking on account of being a bug fan#but this thing is so funny to look at its just so ridiculous#and it lives its whole life like this. that's awesome#quincy.txt#inverts
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Be real with me. You're sitting in a bar and a 𝔴𝔞𝔯𝔩𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔬𝔣 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔰𝔢𝔞 with a massive sword rams into the door. Do you or do you not laugh
#one piece#dracule mihawk#one piece live action#i wasn't planning on posting this but a good old shitpost is always enjoyable in a while#can you believe i've been writing with a fountain pen my whole life yet i am the most mediocre calligrapher to bless this earth ?
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#the poll i just saw on parents being over 60 having like 40% no has blown my mind slightly#because i thought this was the over 20s website these days so like how young were your parents when they had you????#my mum was almost 39 so i have a somewhat skewed idea of what's typical#like what do you mean your mum didn't live a whole entire life before she had kids#polls
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LINKTOBER DAY 23- MIPHAS COURT
Birdsong is not the sound of the sea, but it’s better than nothing at all.
(Yona may be a mystery to Sidon, but her grief is familiar.)
((The Alchemist’s last correspondence with the Lost Heir was an argument about becoming Van Ruta’s champion a hundred and three years ago. She had called Mipha a reckless fool, and angrily dove deep into her research under the seas of Holodrum, waiting for an apology that will never come.))
-Totk au masterlist (it’s usually goofy)
-Patreon (if you want to see my sketchbook)
#critdraws#familiar familiar au#lonks diary#art#botw#loz#artists on tumblr#loz comic#sidon#mipha#totk#yona#totk sidon#totk yona#botw mipha#tears of the kingdom#breath of the wild au#zora#breath of the wild#zelda#botw zora#zelda comic#the legend of zelda#legend of zelda#fish grief#elves#in this hot take of an au zora live up to five centuries easily#mipha was sixty eight when she passed#yona (a whole hundred and seventy two) can only rage#somebody get these people therapy
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my favourite genre of post-race Charles Leclerc win is Charles finding Arthur at the barrier, seeing Arthur looking at him with such joy in his eyes and then Charles messing up his hair
#their relationship is so special#like it’s acc beautiful to watch the two of them interact#after all the hardship in their lives and the sacrifices their parents made for them to be where they are today#it’s so special#the whole Leclerc family just always seem so loving and it so special to see#f1#formula 1#charles leclerc#cl16#italian gp 2024#monza gp 2024#Ferrari#arthur leclerc
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Like the majority of society I’m obsessed with Nimona
And I rewatched it a million times and one thing always sticks out to me
There are moments when Ambrosius is surrounded by light like a little protective bubble
That keeps him away from the man he loves more than anything
#nimona#nimona 2023#ambrosius goldenloin#ballister boldheart#ballister x ambrosius#goldenheart#he always looks so small in these scenes#like the light is going to swallow him whole#it almost looks like a little kid wearing his parents clothes#like he’ll never live up to the expectations society has placed on him#this man is so lonely for the whole movie#poor baby had to figure out everything by himself#he looks so tired in the second picture#the thing that kills me is in the last scene he tries to leave the bubble#but Bal shoved him back in#bubba looks ethereal throughout the whole movie#this movie man#it kills me slowly#I love it so much#I’m gonna go cry myself to sleep now#people from the rise fandom know I only post angst when I’m sleep deprived
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12 year old tlt percy jackson is so much stronger than me. if I found out my best friend was actually a 24 year old half-goat that was lying to me for years, only to be lied to again about my parentage by an actual greek god, only to find out that my teacher had been in on it too.... I would blow my fucking lid, camp half blood would never have seen such a tantrum
#perseus jackson you have my whole heart#walker is actually killing it with the small scale tantrum too#percy jackson#pjo#percy jackson live#percy jackson live action#pjotv#pjo disney+#percy jackson disney+#percy jackson and the olympians#walker scobell
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Mike Schmidt the sleepest guy in FNAF
#myart#chloesimagination#doodles#fnaf#fnaf movie#fnaf fanart#five nights at freddy's#mike schmidt#abby schmidt#ness fnaf#matpat#sparky fnaf#this tweet lives in my mind rent free#deadass what Mike was doing through the whole movie
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i cant stop thinking about the fact that the us and uk killed one million people in indonesia as part of the cold war effort and barely anybody knows about it much less cares. trying to tell somebody about it especially in the west will just garner laughter and celebration -- genocide is okay if they are (true or suspected) communists, no matter what. one million people
#op#this is not a number that exists solely in an infographic#those were whole and complete people with rich inner lives and families who probably thought very very similarly to you#who died in some of the most horrific ways possible#and its a total blot in the collective memory of the united states#the youngest of the victims were only as old as my father -- the majority of the survivors are alive today and still asking for an apology
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