#the video truly is insane it doesn't have a “point” i just put all of my pressure headcanons in writing on my screen to read out and
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i have this 40 minute long ramble podcast-y video on top of run footage about pressure/sebastian and i really want to make it public for the real pressureheads but i go off on zeals writing maybe a little too insanely to actually make it public (in a positive way but still) but i have a lot of good clips from it i might eventually post. here's one where i ramble about what'd happen if they wanted to make sure he still had all his tastebuds
#sebastian solace#roblox pressure#pressure roblox#data.txt#not quite a text post but not quite an art post#the video truly is insane it doesn't have a “point” i just put all of my pressure headcanons in writing on my screen to read out and#i just talked about all of them pure stream of consciousness. and then i edited it all bizarrely nicely together for like 2 people to watch#i think if zeal saw the segments where i just quote the mental asylum tiktok verbatim after i talk about a writing thing i like id die
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I was thinking- what if Vil does one of those celebrity documentaries when he's older? He's settled down with you, you have kids, his career is still going good. He'll talk about when you guys decided to settle down and have kids (the home video clips of him loving his kids 🥲). They'll sit you down and you just radiate loving housewife energy and someone will sneakily catch on camera Vil looking at you so softly while you're recording your part. Him admitting his problems with Neige (and the team interviewed him too but he still has no idea about Vil's true feelings), how he always wanted a role outside of being a villain. Rook having his own interviews being his usual self but also suddenly showing up in your home during filming. Epel wanting to get in on it to kinda reveal the bs Vil made him put up with (and Vil just chuckles cause he still knows he was right) and to promote the farm. And then Vil mentions how he owes Malleus favors (does he reveal he overblotted?). Cue the screen suddenly showing Malleus sitting comfortably in a chair and smiling smugly. And then you notice he's in your home. And he's just like, "Oh, yes. I did Schonheit some favors back then." And it shows some backstage footage of the film crew wondering if they should even try and contact THE Malleus Dragonia to get an interview, and if they do if they actually have the guts to. But before they can decide you pull up, "Oh? You wanna talk to Mal? Let me ask him!" And you just speed dial him and ask and once you hang up he's magically poofed into your home for the interview. He doesn't mind talking about Vil and you but also sneaks in some gargoyle stuff. There's also extra footage of your still young kids hearing Mal is here and running up to him, "Uncle Mal~!!" And you, Vil, Mal, and the kids having a small tea break.
Oh man, what're you doing dropping this beautiful piece in my inbox when you should post it on your page and get the attention it deserves?? Because this is ADORABLE and AMAZING! All the ideas you threw out in here were so cute, Vil finally having the confidence to talk about you and his family, his carreer as a total...plus that Malleus blurb LMFAOOOO, When you're asked what person in your school years affected you most other than Vil or what friends you had that were most prominent, you say "Oh, Malleus Draconia! I think he's king of brair valley right now, though."
Everyone just stares at you in shock, but Vil kinda like "You have his number, right? Call him over." (He did it for the drama...he thought it would be funny for the documentary, and he was right. It became the most replayed part of the entire section.)
AND YOUR KIDS WITH VIL TALKING AND HANGING OUT WITH MALLEUS LIKE OL' CHUMS IS SO ADORABLE. When Malleus comes over, he always has some sort of riches or treasures for your children. He's constantly playing with them. He's your go-to baby sitter and he LOVES it. You being best friends with Malleus while married with Vil HAS to be my favorite thing about ALL OF THIS. It's so adorable i'm sobbing crying shaking throwing up.
The home clips...oh my gosh i'm so soft. YES!! Imagine when the documentary gets released, so many people point out places that they noticed Rook was in the background in the videos when you didn't see them before. It was insane, an entire conspiracy theory trend came out of it.
I like to think you have home videos of VIL being the housewife, cooking in his "Kiss the queen" Apron while holding one of your children on his side and using a spatula to flip the pancakes with the other. He had no idea you released this to the director, it came a shock to him when there was a section of the documentary dedicated to how you felt being married and having kids with one of the worlds biggest stars. He probably cried a little about it, ngl.
PLEASE I IMPLORE YOU reveal yourself!! Or post this!! Because it's such a cute idea and I think you truly deserve the rightful attention! But thank you for sharing, this was such a fun read and I enjoyed exploring / expanding more on it heuheuheu.
#Vil#Vil schoenheit#Twst#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland headcannons#Vil X reader#vil schoenheit x reader#Vil schoenheit headcannons#twst headcannons#etheries rants💜✨#Malleus#malleus draconia
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I started this with a silly joke about the best frenemies but we can take a lot here. I think.
Shiga never earned the respect of LoV...do you think he cares? Or LoV cares? Bc they follow his plans ...and from what I get...Shig is not noisy, so if they have a side hustle....shig is fine with with it "what a nice boss" not really!
This supposed side hustle could have been a problem for Shig ...and the fact he doesn't even asks what they do...is concerning, but even if we go "LoV wouldn't do anything to prevent Shig's insane dream to be true" it's also a huge leap hori wants us to take...regarding shig bc dude has no interaction or desire to know LoV. He manipulates them...and sure he give the sushi but it was more to manipulate them "you all did a good job, here take a reward" than anything
(btw that in itself is miles better than what Izu has. You say A1 has potential. I agree but as I mentioned many times...this potential is not in being nf IZU's friends. If I had to give friends to Izu ...I would make him befriend people who aren't from A1)
Shiga is a pretty incompetent leader. His goals and plans make no sense.
And as much I like dabi and I think his past is better, writing wise, than Shig...doesn't mean he is better. Bc I don't get what was Dabi's plan before joining LoV. What was he doing? Killing random people? Did Endy even cared?
Also if we go "it was essential for dabi to join LoV" ok...show us why. Bc the way I see dabi had no real plan, a goal yes but no plan. The video thing could have happened without LoV.
Sorry it's just ...dabi has some blank spaces and it leave me confuse me.
Shigarakis character and his whole substance/arc/development or whatever you want to call it is underdeveloped and very much lacking
In my opinion this is one of the reasons why we as readers can't say much. Before shigaraki dies his last words are dedicated to spinner and the league but we haven't seen Shigaraki really care for the leauge and grow into a reliable leader for the leauge. This in my opinion stems from horikoshi doing tell don't show instead of doing show and tell when it comes to his story.
Shigaraki as a character is never truly explored in depth. The MVA and overhaul arcs could of been great arcs for him by giving focus on his relationship with the league and izuku himself. After the kamino arc shigaraki should be in a somewhat tough position having left behind three members of the league some of the league members would feel vulnerable and may not trust shigaraki as he literally abandoned three team members!! Shigaraki also lost AFO at this point so he would be in a tough position without advice or anything really so the overhaul arc would help him to grow into the role of a leader and prove to the leauge that he can be trusted. He could do this by getting revenge on maganes death and all and he could use overhaul to learn more about the underground and izuku in general.
I would also have it so that it's Izuku that gets kidnapped in the training camp arc (not bakugo or have both izuku and bakugo be kidnapped) and that would establish a connection between the leauge and izuku even if it may start on a bad foot.
when it comes to the MVA arc the leagues loyaltly and shigaraki's loyalty is put to the test. We would get more bonding time with them and just see their overall other goals that may contradict with the league itself.
Shigarakis interest in Izuku doesn't disappear and he actually uses the MVA resources to actually reach out and get to know izuku or he tired to get to know more about izuku be all.
Dabi first joined the league due to the influence stain and had and in my opinion he also joined due to needing a place to crash and free food. His goal was to take down and kill enji but I guess during that he lost his true goal and ended up doing things to build his reputation as a villain (like burning people alive)
In the end I would very much change this and build up on the leauge of villains characters and explore their personality, goals and how these two things can contradict or compliment eachother which can cause conflict .
#mha critical#bnha critical#mha#hori is a bad writer#horikoshi critical#bhna critical#bnha#shigaraki deserves better#shigaraki tomura#dabi#league of villains#wasted potential#we need more shigaraki development#he really doesnt have much and the inconsistency drives me insane#thanks for the ask#thank you for the ask#thanks for the question
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Here's another crack idea that popped into my head. Persona 5's Ren Amamiya/Joker being the biological son of Pizza Tower's Peppino Spaghetti.
Is it dumb? Yes. Is it absurdly stupid and insane? Yes. Do I regret this? FUCK NO. Let Joker be half crazy Italian with an even more nutty father who WILL pile drive god if he has to. Also his last name for this shall be Spaghetti, Amamiya being his middle, cause I ain't half assing things.
(Putting a link to Part 2 here and make sure people check the reblogs for this as I added an extra page!)
Peppino is the anxious father that does his best to raise his kid despite the various issues he has to face. Whether it be finding a decent school, make sure there's some money for a little rare treat, or keep Ren's awful mother from breaking shared custody rules. Do not trifle with this man.
Any rat/mouse/raccoon in the restaurant? Those are Ren's pets who eat the insects and scare off the bad customers. (Kid does lemonade stands to buy pet friendly soap alongside basic necessities.) Peppino doesn't question it since they make his son happy and take care of the pests.
Ren absolutely helped around the pizzeria whenever he could. First time Peppino cries is when his kid made his first pizza. The second being a 12 year old Ren getting him a well made chef's hat for a birthday present. (You can say our boy already has Rank 3 proficiency.)
All the Pizza Tower weirdness can be considered normal for Joker as he doesn't exactly come from the Personaverse. (I wholeheartedly believe in Ren being a sheer cryptid, even more after seeing this comic.) His mother just dumped him there during her turn and left Ren in that neighborhood where he comes across Shido. Yes, Peppino absolutely lost it when his precious little Spaghetti didn't come home that night.
He looked everywhere for Ren and the events of Pizza Tower only put a big fat Stop Sign to that for quite awhile. Meanwhile the younger Spaghetti didn't have a fun time adjusting until Persona 5 truly kicked off. He wasn't thrown in a rigged court trial.
Ren just knocked Shido's lights out then fucking outran the cops like his Pops would on a 3rd lap game wise. He finds Leblanc and camps out there for two months. Well until Sojiro barely manages to drag Ren inside as his sanity(heart) couldn't handle this strange homeless teen facing the harsh elements. The kid running like an insane Usain Bolt when startled didn't help too.
Ren is absolutely homesick thus his Persona get to hear it the most. (I'm aware of the sheer irony with a French Persona having an half Italian wielder.) Arséne is very curious to meet Ren's father at some point and cackled upon hearing his charge's antics.
The other Thieves have no clue about how bizarre their leader's origins is. Funnily enough, Haru wholeheartedly believes in Ren's stories despite even Morgana considering it a crazy tall tale. (She got rewarded with a video of an 8 year old Ren having a breakdancing contest against his dad while sentient pizza toppings cheered them on.) The guy doesn't blame his other friends and is instead waiting for the chance to blow their minds like the gremlin he is.
Well Ren can thank Royal's Third Semester cause guess who shows up for the true boss fight?! A wild Peppino at Mach 4 speed about to pile drive his kid's former councilor. Haru is the only person not gawking when Ren's dad drags the unconscious man out before FINALLY being able to hug his kid.
Joker gets an extra gift than just him and his friends being able to keep their Persona. He can now visit everyone with a simple press of his phone. Sojiro and Peppino absolutely butt heads in a mostly friendly father flavored rivalry. (Ren doesn't notice at first as he's too busy showing One Shot Kill Medjed to Gustavo.)
Peppino absolutely fainted when his son drops an entire suitcase with enough money to not only pay off the debt but to even refurbish the diner and still have cash leftover. Maximum money perks can make Mementos a good place to grind. Ren always converted a chunk of his spoils to the appropriate currency so he can help his dad.
Peppino's Pizzeria is a secondary hangout for the Phantom Thieves and absolutely gets subjected to Persona shenanigans. Game Night is for everyone despite the fact Carmen/Milady/Arséne tend to cheat at cards. Peppino takes it as an excuse to do it too.
The older Spaghetti does his best to support his son and his friends. Whether it be making pizza that grant great stat buffs, help in battle if Ren can find a Golden Pizza Cutter whenever traversing a dungeon or offer some simple advice. Peppino will continue to drop kick anyone who gets in the way of that.
And this anxiety driven beat shall play at maximum volume.
youtube
#sonicasura#back at my bullshit#now it's pizza flavored#persona#persona series#persona 5#persona 5 royal#persona 5 scramble#persona 5 tactica#p5#p5r#p5s#p5t#ren amamiya#persona joker#p5 joker#well#ren amamiya spaghetti for this#pizza tower#peppino spaghetti#pizza tower peppino#dad!peppino#peppino is ren's dad#crack#crack treated seriously#Youtube
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vro0m's rewatch - 174/332
2016 Canadian GP
Alright. For some reason I don't have the pre race to this one but we'll make do anyway. (Hindsight note : not an issue because I was SO MUCH CONTENT for this one. Like several videos as well.)
The weather isn't great. 40% chance of rain, there's been showers earlier in the day. Lewis is on pole ahead of Nico and Seb. Then it's Ricciardo, Verstappen, Raikkonen, Valtteri, Massa, Hulkenberg and Alonso.
Formation lap.
As a reminder Lewis is now only 24 points behind Nico.
Oh there's still people on the grid when the cars get back there. Not great. Lewis is pointing towards the inside, as he starts on the wrong side of the track. I never truly realised how close to the starting line the first corner is in Montreal. Just a few metres.
And they're racing.
OH MY GOD. SEB. INSANE START. HE IMMEDIATELY PULLS AHEAD OF LEWIS WHILE NICO AND HIM ARE WHEEL TO WHEEL INTO THE FIRST CORNER. HE TAKES THE LEAD! NICO AND LEWIS TOUCHED IN THE SECOND CORNER! NICO GETS OFF TRACK. HE LOSES PLACES AS A RESULT. Phew. Eventful. Sexy of Seb. Max also made it ahead of Daniel and he's in third position behind Lewis at the end of the lap. P5 is Raikkonen, then Valtteri and Massa, Alonso, Hulkenberg, and Nico is now P10! With DRS, he soon overtakes Alonso for P9. Crofty claims Lewis pushed him wide. I'm unsure about that. Waiting for the replay. Damn Seb's speed at the start is fucking insane. It drives Arrivabene crazy lol. Imo Lewis didn't push Nico wide, he stayed on his line. Magnussen also ran into Nasr btw. Nico is closing on Hulkenberg while Lewis sets the fastest lap. He's gaining on Seb now. But then Seb picks up the pace. Nico missed the chicane and lost time on Hulkenberg.
Lap 10. Seb, Lewis +1.3, Max +6.8, Ricciardo +0.4, Raikkonen +2.9, Valtteri +0.9, Massa +0.9, Hulkenberg +2.4, Nico +1.6, Alonso +4.1. Oh ho, interesting. Max is told not to hold up Daniel. I wonder if he'll comply. Annnd Jenson is stopping off track. His engine is on fire! VSC. Good thing he stopped near marshals, they put the fire out quickly while he jumps out. Seb pits! Just as the VSC ends! They're stacking the cars, Raikkonen is in as well. Seb is out in P4, then. Lewis is still widening the gap to him for now but barely. Then not anymore. Seb is gaining again. I forgot to mention Seb has to pit again anyway apparently they all have to use the softs here for some reason and he went from the ultrasofts to the supersofts so far. He's right behind Daniel now, who's still behind Max. It might slow him down a bit for a minute. It looked to me like Daniel was weaving on the straight a bit but we carry on. He's defending pretty well in the next few corners. Good positioning of the car. But it's not enough. Seb overtakes him even as he locks up. And overtakes Max quickly after. There's another DNF I don't know who, but it's happening in the garages so it doesn't hinder the race. Now Seb is gaining on Lewis really fast.
Lap 20. I'm trying to check the top 10 but twice they showed replays right when the top 4's timings were on screen. Max pits. There we go : Lewis, Seb +8.1, Daniel +6.8, Valtteri +1.9, Massa +5.7, Nico +1.0, Hulkenberg +5.0, Max +2.4, Raikkonen +0.7, and Perez +4.1. Daniel pits. Nico pits. Hulkenberg pits. Hah, Daniel is behind Raikkonen. He's gonna be pissed about that, given he wanted to get ahead of Max. Wait. Seb just gained 2 seconds on Lewis, did he make a mistake? Ted says his German counterparts are incredibly mad at Lewis for the lap 1 touchette, and now everybody is debating, once again, whether it was a foul or not. Again, from what I saw I don't think it was, but the replays weren't great angles. Oh yeah we see now he went wide, that's how Seb got close suddenly. Valtteri pits. Any minute for Lewis now. Nico sets the fastest lap. Yep. It's now. 2.3, good job! Of course Seb is back ahead now, but remember he has to stop again. The gap is 13.1. For now, Seb is still quicker but Lewis must be managing his tyres as well. He's supposed to go to the end on them. 13.5. 13.1. 13.2. 13.
Lap 30. Seb, Lewis +11.9, Verstappen +11.8, Raikkonen +4.9, Ricciardo +0.6, Valtteri +0.7, Nico +2.1, Perez +9.2, Massa +1.1, Hulkenberg +3.4. Seb is vehemently complaining about the backmarkers he has to lap. Perez pits. At the front, the gap is down to 10.6. There's a 4-way battle for P4 between Raikkonen, Daniel +0.3, Valtteri, +0.4, and Nico +0.8. Meanwhile Lewis is still gaining on Seb. 10.2. Raikkonen pits, releasing the others. 9.7. Then Lewis gets slowed down by the backmarkers as well. 9.9. Fastest lap. Valtteri overtook Daniel after he made a mistake. Massa is retiring. And Seb pits! 2.4 stop. Out 7.4 behind Lewis. Nico is attacking Daniel, and we see on the replay he suddenly lost his place to Valtteri because he missed the chicane. Nico overtakes Daniel, who pits, slight mishap, 4.1.
Lap 40. Lewis, Seb +6.7 already, Max +9.9, Valtteri +6.5, Nico +1.8, Raikkonen +15.0, Ricciardo +3.7, Hulkenberg +3.1, Sainz +1.0, and Perez +12.7. Seb is gaining fast. Apparently some people are stopping for a second time, as opposed to the expectations. We're wondering if the Ferrari gamble is gonna work out as the track temperature is falling and tyres are graining. Seb sets the fastest lap. And again. He locked up behind a backmarker though. Aha. Wait a second. Nico, who's almost on Valtteri : "You got to give me more information because of the warning and everything on the steering wheel." The engineer answers : "Copy, the warnings are real." Welp. Max pits suddenly.
Lap 50. Lewis, Seb +5.0, Valtteri +23.8, Nico +6.0, Verstappen +11.3, Raikkonen +3.0, Ricciardo +2.1, Hulkenberg +14.8, Sainz and Alonso are lapped. Nico pits because of a slow right rear puncture, right after he attacked again despite the warnings! Seb is still slowly closing on Lewis. Bit by bit. Daniel attacks Raikkonen but can't make it. 4.5 from Lewis to Seb. Ah but Seb locked up, missed the chicane and lost a chunk of time! Phew. Nico overtakes Raikkonen for P5.
Lap 60, 10 laps to go. Lewis, Seb +5.5, Valtteri +31.2 (very nice podium in sight btw), Max +6.3, Nico +4.2, Raikkonen +4.0, Ricciardo +2.6, Hulkenberg +33.1, Sainz +2.2, and Perez +7.3. Seb locks up again. Nico is all over Max's rear now. Woohoooho Verstappen defends FIERCELY and very well. Lol Alonso is asking if he can stop but they're saying no because they might get a point if something happens to a car ahead. He grunts. Max is still defending. Nico locks up, he loses a bit of time over him. 4 laps to go. The situation at the front has clearly stabilised. Nico is gonna try again… OH! Wtf? He attacks at the end of the straight but his car goes sideways right as he gets ahead and he slides in the run-off area after the chicane! He manages to go away again.
And it's the end of the race!
We get a wonderful Valsewis podium lol can't wait! "Get in there pal, awesome race mate, awesome race!" Bono says. Man the way he's saluting this crowd you'd think it's his home race lol. He's taking his time.
He jumps to his team and they pull him to the other side of the fence. He does a shuffle, shakes Seb's hand, high fives the grid girls (?).
Toto gives credit to their strategist who made the right call. They weren't sure the tyres would survive till the end but it worked out.
Ahhh Seb got to the cool down room and they're just watching the times together.
Val joins them and they barely react.
Lewis says "I enjoyed chasing you down!" with a huge smile. "When you came in I was like???" Breathlessly he says "It was such a bad start, what the hell!" Seb grins "Mine was okay, did you notice?" IAHSGDGEHSZEUEJ THEY'RE SO AAAAAAAH fucking brat omg. Lewis chuckles, they exchange a look, and Seb elbows him.
Lewis repeats his was very bad and then he got to turn 1 and had crazy understeer.
Seb says yeah, tailwind all race. OHHH IS IT THE SEAGULL RACE? Seb interrupts Lewis and asks if he saw them. He says yes, Seb says he avoided them. Is that when you went (???) Lewis asks. I brake for animals, Seb talks over him. That's when you caught up! He adds. I was sleeping at that point, I don't know why, Lewis says. Seb says he looked at the seagulls and locked up.
Suddenly it's like Lewis notices the camera and his face closes off. The conversation dies down.
While they're receiving their trophies Crofty says listening to Seb and Lewis he gets the feeling they enjoyed their battles and "are desperate to race each other on the track at the moment". He's basically writing fanfic. The merc representative on the podium is apparently one of the tallest men in the paddock according to the commentators and when Lewis holds him by the shoulder for a photo he indeeds looks very very smol.
Michael Douglas is interviewing for some reason. Of course Lewis is extremely happy. He asks about the first corner. Lewis starts by thanking everyone who came, bla bla bla Montréal is great. He says he had a very bad start, Seb and Nico got a good run, the tyres were cold, he understeered. He feels very grateful Nico and him didn't damage anything on the cars. And after that it was just trying to chase "this guy" down, who was so quick. He's happy with the car. He says he won his first GP here in 2007. Such a blessing. Seb gets a lot of cheers. Douglas congratulates him for the start and asks what the issue was after that. Seb smiles, "Lewis was a bit too quick, that was the issue." He says they might have struggled a bit because of the wind. He says they committed to a different strategy early on and the plan was to come back but the tyres lasted better than expected so Lewis stayed ahead. In the last question Lewis goes full nostalgia talking about his first win.
Nico is very unhappy. He says Lewis did a "very hard racing manoeuvre" on him. He says he was very pissed in the moment but that's racing and in the end it's his job to make sure next time a battle such as this one comes up he's ahead. The journalist apologises for his language, he seems genuinely surprised. She tells him some words he used can't be used live on TV. "I'll apologise then, you don't have to apologise on my behalf," he says. That's good. He says it's frustrating because they had a good car, Lewis showed the car was worthy of the win.
In RBR's corner Verstappen is happy with his race and Ricciardo is disappointed. Not too happy about Max not moving out of his way but he plays it down. Horner praises Max, points out they had to pit Danny at a bad time because he locked up and got a flat spot. About the team order he says at some point Ricciardo looked quicker but then Max's tyres cleaned up from the graining and it didn't matter anymore basically.
Lewis shows up in the media pen bundled up and with a British flag.
He says his practice start for the formation lap was amazing and he doesn't understand what happened with the race start. He's chuckling about it. Then again the understeer, he was under attack, and the "unfortunate collision… Tap, with Nico".
Then he says it was hunting down Sebastian, they both had really good pace, but Seb made a few mistakes. He himself apart from one time in turn 10 didn't make any mistake so he's very happy. Great strategy, good tyre management, the team made the right calls. He keeps sighing, shrugging, shaking his head with a smile.
He can't believe it went as well as it did. He really enjoyed the race, "smooth". For context Muhammad Ali died shortly before that so when Lewis won he said the famous sentence "fly like a butterfly sting like a bee" and he says the last 10-15 laps Ali was all he could think of. The journalist says "fly like a butterfly, these last few laps–" he interrupts her, "it really felt like that, that's why I was thinking of him." "It felt like I was floating," he adds. "everytime he did a good lap i was able pull another lap in which I'm sure was painful for him," he chuckles, "in terms of like a sting, you know?"
She asks if he was surprised to see him pit when he did. He gets serious. He definitely was. He says his team told him to stay out. He was excited because he thought they had a race on their hands, "I wanted to race him on the track," he says with a hungry smile.
He was worried his tyres were graining but he still made it to lap 25, then he moved to the other tyre and it was "just sweet".
It iiiis the seagull race. They find Lewis again in the paddock. He complains of the cold. He repeats some of the same things he said before. And then, behind his back, we see Seb walking past. A red and white sleeve appears in the frame and reaches for his shoulder.
"He's not braking for animals!" Seb says. "You should give him a hard time because of that."
Simon asks what this is all about, he did hear about seagulls. "2 seagulls, turn one," Seb says. Lewis tilts his head. "I feel like you're using the seagulls, I feel, I feel that they were innocent."
Seb hasn't taken his hands off of him. "Yeah but I'm a racing driver so I have to find some sort of excuse why, why the hell you beat me!" he says, as he grabs him even tighter and shakes him. Seb tells the story while Lewis glares at him with a wide smile. "I have my eyes into turn one, and I saw these… Stupid couple of seagull sitting there, all relaxed!" Lewis interjects. "Hey man it was planned! You know I'm good with animals, right?" he says as he puts his hand on his chest.
"I'm like doctor doolittle I told them to be there and they were there and…" Seb shakes him some more.
Simon says they had their crew check and they couldn't find the images of the seagulls. Genuine surprise in Seb's face while Lewis laughs. "Honestly," he says. "Invisible seagulls," Simon says. "They were white doves," Lewis says bouncing up and down like a boy.
A pause. "Well I don't know, whatever, white birds," Seb says. Lewis laughs. "It wasn't a pigeon, it was a seagull!" Seb protests still. "I could see the beak. I don't know their name but they were there!" He grabs Lewis again. "You saw them as well!"
He nods, Seb shoves him lightly. Simon interrupts, he thinks they might have found the images, but it's not the right ones.
When we get back to them Seb has his own mic. "I will stay here until you find the lap," Seb says. We see the start. But it's still not the right lap. Seb takes time to show off his sponsors on camera "there you go".
Simon asks questions about the Ferrari strategy mistake. "First of all I didn't want to crash your interview I'm sorry," Seb says. "No no no," Lewis answers, "It's good, it's nice! It's nice! You make it easy for me!" Seb goes on to say he'll always defend what they're doing, they have good people. He turns to Lewis : "Did you try to do, would you– honest answer. Were you always going to stay out?" – "No, no, we were going to do a two stop. That was plan… Plan A was doing a two stop as well so." They're constantly talking over one another so it's difficult to transcribe. Seb turns back to Simon and say see, in his shoes, you do the opposite. Aka they went for the two stop so Merc tried the one stop. Lewis approves but then he adds that they were staying out anyway. "Before you decided to go in we were staying out." Seb seems unconvinced. "I'd been told to stay out, so," Lewis continues "I think they'd already decided to go onto another strategy." Seb says with hindsight it's always easy. Lewis cuts him off : "They said plan B and I was like 'the hell is plan B? I don't remember what it is?'" then Simon says Ferrari is faring better and they might be able to chase the Mercedes down. Seb says it's a very ambitious plan but they're going for it. Lewis pretend-boxes him with the flag wrapped around his hand. He adds that 2 years ago they were unbeatable and now they are very close, he smiles and puts his hand on Lewis' shoulder again, shakes him lightly slides his hand down his arm.
"He can definitely feel our breath." Simon changes subject. "In terms of the seagulls…" They are all staring at the screen, Seb points at it "Get the lap! Get the seagulls!" But Simon finished his sentence "... We can't find them." Lewis describes for the nth time when it happened. And here we go. Finally. Everybody exclaims! "Two seagulls, see?" Seb says triumphantly. Lewis is laughing again.
"I had my eyes so deep into the apex," Seb describes with wide gestures. "I locked up!" We see the images again. "Oh my god," Lewis squeals, "They're so far away!" Seb grunts. "Mind the animals! Honestly!" Simon tries to talk but Seb is still processing. "Did you see? They stayed! Can we see that again please?" He's still pointing at the screen. "They stayed there! That's what really annoyed me. They stayed there!" he repeats, his voice high with marvel and astonishment. We see the images again. Lewis comments Seb is locking up way before the seagulls. "Yeah but look, there's a red car coming at, I don't know, a hundred something… They stay there!" he says higher still. "I'm not sure they're very clever, seagulls," Simon says. Lewis chuckles. "Maybe that's why they didn't see you coming." Seb is wild. "If you can catch these two seagulls, you might prove the opposite of what you ever find out in history about seagulls!" he jokes, looking at Simon but his eyes darting to Lewis who is still giggling. "I think I might have to buy you a couple seagulls," he says. "I don't know if they're white seagulls whatever I think you need a couple."
Seb grabs his neck again. "You told me you had some…" he gestures with his hand. Lewis catches on. "One bird did poo on my visor at one stage," he explains to Simon, while Seb laughs. "Is that right?" Simon asks. Seb bows and hands his mic over with two hands. Taps Lewis shoulder. "Thank you, well done man," he says. Seb is gone.
They pick up the interview where they left off before Seb's arrival as they slowly start walking down the paddock. Simon asks about Lewis' homage to Ali, and points to the "boxing glove". Lewis explains someone gave him the flag and he just wrapped it around his hand because he's freezing. Lewis explains Ali has been an inspiration to so many people etc. Explains about the end of the race again. That's it.
In the notebook, Ted says Nico seems increasingly annoyed. "But, you know, what does Rosberg expect? Hamilton. Is. Deadly. Absolutely. Unrelenting. Unrelenting. He takes no prisoners ever in a race car. That's why he's so brilliant, that's why he's such an awesome champion."
Videos to come! Stay tuned!
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Hockey Player AU! Kyle "Gaz" Garrick Headcanons
...
Superstar. Forward. Drafted first overall. Alt captain. Left wing.
Raised in the UK but was soon recognized for his potential. A US family took him in to play in the states where he would have better opportunities. Trained at all the top notch facilities though high school with the best of the best. Drafted right out of high school and went straight into the NHL on a truly wild contract.
Top line, but put him with anyone and he'll make something happen. 50+ goal scorer, plus sooo many assists. Always in the right place at the right time. Guy you don't want to see four on four / three on three, he's dangerous on open ice.
Wheel, snipe, celly. Crazy aim, bar down all day everyday. Moderately flashy but honestly he can't help it, he's got HANDS; can stick handle in a phone booth. Seriously the compilation videos look like they should be from chel not real life.
Still responsible defensively, he's not going to leave his guys hanging. Soap's a defenseman and they work super well together. Soap will put it on net from the blue line and Gaz will grab the rebound and put it in, he doesn't care how good the goalie's rebound control is.
Always has a fun celly ready for the crowd! Amazing sportsmanship (aside from the chirps). Clean player, no cheapshots here. He always apologizes for bad hits or accidents. Well known in the league for just being a great guy behind closed doors too.
Could be a contender for literally any award he's eligible for. MVP, points, sportsmanship, community activism, you name it.
The Only charismatic hockey player. Does lots of interviews, is active on personal social media, has his own brand of activewear. Started a program to make hockey more accessible to underserved youth in his city.
Kills at chel. He was the cover last season!
Thigh. That's it that's the tweet. Insane thigh muscles. Wears short shorts around pregame so the social media people can get some good photos. And we all go nuts over it on twitter.
Mic'd up status: absolutely has and does want to be mic'd up, always gassing up his teammates, throws devastating chirps with Soap. They have to beep most of Soap's though because they're too explicit.
Hockey hair status: Sure it looks nice short but where's the flow!!! Natural?? Locs??? Please consider. Facial hair during the playoffs... the beard isn't up to par but the mustache is fine.
Roster pic status: smiling, manages to look hot where everyone else on the team looks like shit
WAG status: His girlfriend is hot and basically queen of the WAGs. Always in their box during games with the other girls having a fun time. They look sooo good together it's not even funny. Hosts parties at their house for the team. Their couples halloween costumes are the best!!
She's also a community activist and dropped the puck at one of their home games. Gaz, of course, took the face off. And then got down on one knee to propose to her. Obviously she said yes and the video went viral instantly.
....
I do NOT consent for my works, part of my works, or my ideas to be used for ANY form of AI.
More hockey au: Ghost | Soap | Price
Note: "Chel" is an abbreviation of NHL referring to the video game. WAG stands for wife and girlfriend or the plural, used to refer to sports guy's significant others. Yes it is heteronormative.
The WAG part is absolutely welcome to be interpreted as self insert :D
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Bocchi The Rock 8: What Is There To Even Say?
I mean it, what is there to say anymore about this show? Generic praise doesn't do it justice and without spending ages diving into every little bit it feels like you can't fairly show your appreciation for this insane series. I mean, they basically made an animated music video for this song. Guitar POV? The camera work? The depth of field? Visually it's incredible art that has you questioning your sanity and ability to pick out whether they're 3d or 2d models. Yes, you can see Nijika in 3d in the background, but it took me 3 watches of this scene to pick up on it because it's so. damn. good. I don't even know what else to say at this point. It's just... wow.
Cloverworks just always nails the feel as well, their understanding and approach are almost priceless. A more story focused episode that places importance on the girls and their band? Let's do a more toned down episode so the music can shine. God, it's just so good that I can't get it out of my head. And it's not like they sacrificed much of anything to achieve this, the creative direction still exists. The faceless characters still appear, the aggressive camera angles and positioning are still there. The baseline for this show is so ridiculously strong that it hardly feels like much of anything changes.
For example, anyone want to play the game of life?
No, not quite? How about a (sort of) joke about Japanese work culture?
Maybe a meta joke about putting Bocchi back together after her meltdowns?
My point being, this is par for the course, they're not dazzling viewers with these moments or showing off, they're integrating them. The Bocchi Game of Life is the same Bocchi as the one from the Zoetrope the episode previous. The meta jokes have already been established, changes in art style are essentially normal at this point in time. It's all normal. And that makes moments like the music stick out because of how different they are to the rest of the series. They didn't try anything new this episode, they didn't get crazy like they have with other jokes or skits. It's, as insane as it sounds, the average experience for Bocchi The Rock, and it's truly incredible.
So really, what else is there to say? That there's a really lovely backstory for Nijika and her older sister that takes advantage of the slower paced episode? That the characters and their dynamics are really put on display in these moments to show their progression and development with the series? That they dropped the title in the episode? That they did just a credit ending so that the content of the episode would be more significant? Just give this staff the god damn Oscar, Emmy, whatever award they deserve already.
#bocchi the rock!#hitori gotoh#anime#bocchi chan#anime and manga#Bocchi#ぼっち・ざ・ろっく!#animation#anime review
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Project “Let’s watch every single Fast & Furious movie”
The series is still finding its feet and not entirely sure what it wants to be. It has however decided that this one should contain a truly incredible amount of homoerotic subtext.
2 Fast 2 Furious (2003)
We check back in with Brian, who is street racing for a living in Miami now that he is no longer a cop. Ludacris, is here, for some reason. The FBI show up and put our boy over a barrel until he helps them investigate another crime ring, with his car.
The cinematography and general visual language is much more mature, they've figured out how to shoot cars driving and in particular races in a way that better conveys relative position, advantage, and speed. No more undercranked footage, much more medium to wide shots of cars weaving past each other, as well as some complicated composited motion shots.
If you look for this movie on Tumblr you mostly find gifs of Devon Aoki in her girlboss pink Honda S2000. And yeah, I get it, this look kicks ass. The leather skirt and thigh highs with garters or whatever that is really screams 2003.
Right, the plot. Even more so than last time, the core plot is extremely mid. Brian is over a barrel, and needs to help the FBI investigate a drug lord, in exchange for them forgetting about him. He doesn't trust a cop to partner with him so he gets them to offer a deal to his old boyfriend Roman, with whom he had a falling out many years ago. The two of them go undercover smuggling money for the drug lord and eventually work through their differences and get the guy. Big whoop.
Far more interesting is how the interpersonal relationship of Brian and Roman is handled. These two feel like a couple who dated all through high school and broke up over a nasty disagreement when they were 19 and never really got over each other. The first time they meet they physically throw down and it looks like this.
Just straight guy things. I made a crack about 2 bi 2 curious in the last post and I was like "someone has to have made this joke before" and a) not really it looks like only a couple tweets but b) it led me to this short video essay on a bisexual reading of 2 Fast 2 Furious. I don't agree with all its finer points and I think the author completely misread some sections of the movie but you'll find far more agreement than disagreement from me with this one.
youtube
Carrying on, there's a lot of the awkward "I want to trust you, and I know I should be able to trust you, but I don't trust you" between these two. It's great, if you want to watch two very pretty guys go insane over each other for an hour and a half, this is a movie for you. I'm going to reiterate a lot of what's said in this video because it's all very obvious.
Before we continue, I need to note that what you don't see, oddly, is really any kind of coherent heterosexual romantic subplot. Like, there's one there, they do parts of it, but it's almost homeopathic. It's purely there to check the box. Monica is an undercover cop who's been with the drug lord for like a year and, in theory, Brian is attracted to her. There's discussion of this, he checks her out, they make bedroom eyes at each other, the drug lord gets jealous, it's a whole thing, but mostly you see that Roman is worried that Brian is going to do something stupid because he's attracted to her.
In the above video the author misinterprets one scene as Brian sleeping with Monica but they do not actually fuck! She shows up in the early morning to tell Brian that he's going to be betrayed but they do not, in fact, fuck! This is important to me because man, there's so little of that subplot going on. This subplot barely develops at all, they don't talk to each other much, and when they do it's only the barest flirting.
At one point Brian does a driving stunt to impress Monica and when he's done, Roman pulls up and goes "oh, he did that stunt? He learned that one from me." which. Come on there's no way to read that that doesn't at least suggest that maybe Roman did it to hit on Brian when they were younger.
Speaking of car stunts, those are used to convey character a lot better in this movie. Dishonorable side characters drive in annoying ways in races to make themselves hard to pass, Brian and Roman do a whole elaborate game of one-upsmanship during their driving audition for the drug lord, and a doubles drag race with high stakes serves as a major bonding moment where they learn to trust each other. There's much, much less plot and character going on explicitly but I think the photography and the storytelling are working together more closely in this movie.
The movie seems to care less about the cars themselves though. The Lancer and Eclipse they drive for much of the movie are not particularly attractive nor particularly powerful cars, and the Challenger and Camaro they pick up later are more plot device than eye candy, unless you're really into American Muscle I guess. The initial race includes Suki's S2000 and Brian's Skyline that both very quickly end up sidelined, you don't see much of them again. There is much less time spent in garages and at races here, which is part of why the core plot feels like a lot of other action movies where the protagonist is a criminal helping the cops. I wonder if some of this is down to appealing to a wider audience who may just not give a shit about the finer distinctions between the Honda Civic EF and EX hatch.
There's a beautiful sunset scene where Brian and Roman just talk it out for a few minutes and settle their differences, come to terms, and finally trust each other again. I know I'm pretty much only talking about this one relationship but it's pretty much the only part of the movie with any depth, and the other parts only gain value in their proximity to it.
The final sequence is a huge endurance run across Florida that is a lot of fun to watch and includes a very funny scene where they scramble like, a hundred cars as a distraction to throw the police off. If you watch you can see that they really just grabbed whatever cars they could find to pad out the shot, there's like three or four PT Cruisers hidden in here.
The final run is mostly a show of the reformed trust between these two, it's great, it's a decent culmination of what's been building up through the whole show, they get their freedom, together, and resolve to move on together.
The whole movie really hangs on this relationship, it elevates it from a solid 5/10 "absolutely mid action movie" to a 7/10 "compelling characters you will think about later" type deal.
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for the ask game!!
"It's true, isn't it?"
“I don’t think so,” Etho shakes his head. He looks into his hands, picking at a chip in his nail. “I still loved you. Still love you.”
“Sure.” Bdubs doesn’t sound truly convinced, but he says it in a gentle voice that Etho’s only heard when Bdubs is making sure he’s okay when he hurts himself, a voice he heard a lot in the death game. But it doesn’t bite any less. Etho sighs.
“Why are you here, Bdubs?” he says, finally turning to him. “When there’s a perfectly good version of you asleep somewhere, alive.”
“Because you’re dreaming about apologizing to me, your brain’s stuck on hallucinating me,” Bdubs says, furrowing his brow. “Because you feel bad.”
“I don’t...I don’t think I feel bad.”
The shape of Bdubs’ face finally comes into view, the one he knows from outside the games, unbruised and awake.
“You sure?”
laurie belaurie only you would choose this fic and it means so much to me that you did!
this is from Night Swims (previously called You're My Favorite Ghost), and it takes place right after Hot Tea! gosh, this fic was so fun for me, I really dived right into how ethubs works as characters and tried my best to analyze etho without having bdubs there.
through this entire fic, etho's guilt and despair manifests physically as the "ghost" of bdubs, who follows him around his modded world. tldr: he can't sleep, and his guilt makes it worse! I originally got this idea after a beloved mutual (nightbug! hi!) sent me an ask curious on how etho dealt with the loss of bdubs post last life, and honestly. until that point, I don't think I'd realized that etho just. doesn't really go back to hermitcraft after last life. not in his videos, not really. he jumps straight into modded. and so I started writing!
this scene in particular is really interesting to me, because etho isn't really good at dealing with complex emotions, to me--he can, but he's a lot more likely to just pretend they don't bother him all that much. he's real easy going, real cool and chill, and I think there is a point where things get to him, but when they do, they really get to him (something I talked about in Spacer!). he tries hard to keep it at bay by working harder ("With no left over time for thinking too hard. With no left over time to mourn. Right.") but there comes a breaking point (this section) where he's forced to confront his feelings.
it was purposeful to have etho confront his feelings in a way that wasn't internal--that is, bdubs' ghost being the reason he "can't keep doing this" and eventually sends a letter to bdubs. so while he's trying to work and trying to put it off, those feelings get to a point where he's forced to do something about them, or risk making himself miserable in his condition. I think etho, alongside tango, are two characters that put big, difficult, complex feelings aside to deal with later, only to never come back to them. at least I think so!
this fic is actually titled after the half alive song Night Swims, chosen in post. the song is more of a spoken word piece, and I think it's descriptions of needing to shed feeling and take a break from the world, and from yourself, is really pertinant to what etho was experiencing. he's suffering through grief and self-doubt and anger with himself and isn't able to fully realize it. instead of facing those feelings head on, he takes a break, and in doing so, accidentally makes that grief worse by feeling like he's running from the source. it's only in Back Around, the follow up fic to Night Swims, that etho feels strong enough to face those feelings and return to hermitcraft, to season 9.
anyway! i'm still insane about ethubs to this day. i always meant to write another half alive inspired ethubs fic...
(x)
#ask#ethubs#text#fics#ask game#HIII LAURIEE HIIII EHEHHEHE#i'm so glad you chose this fic.. i love this one a lot :(#definitely one of my flop fics lmao <33 cult classic if you will#i had no idea you actually read it tbh#fun fact i wrote the bit about etho building a house for no one first <3#it was what inspired me#anyway ty laurie!! <33
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Hey I just read your answer about bad writing in dark romance ! Do you have some well-written dark romance to recommend to us ?
Yes!
I'll add a caveat: like I said lol, I'm really not into torture porn dark romances, so Haunting Adeline-type books aren't my thing. But I feel like they've become considered dark romances? Whereas my understanding is more along the lines of how the Fated Mates episode explained it. It's not just the hero or heroine's morality--it's also the world in which they live, the comfort of sitting in amorality, etc.
Soooo I'd recommend--
King's Captive by Amber Bardan. I really need to read more of Amber, tbh. This one begins with the heroine at her birthday party, at which point the hero has killed practically everyone there, her father included. He then sweeps her off to his private island, and we have a years-long time jump. It's got a very eerie atmosphere. Super intense and verrry sexy (he notably gives her a mixtape that she masturbates to and stands on the other side of the door KNOWING she's masturbating lmao). Insane twist, very violent, a lot of weirdly sensual descriptions of how he cooks steak?
Kresley Cole's Gamemaker series I'd recommend in general. The first two books are very Russian mafia-angled (especially the first) and the third is like... affiliated, but it's not mafia. The heroes are intensely possessive, the heroines actually fight back, etc. I've compared The Master to Kresley's PNR Lothaire, which... I'd argue that several IAD books overlap with dark romance, lmao (Dreams of a Dark Warrior, Lothaire, and MacRieve come to mind). But because The Master doesn't have the vampiric element, instead you have a guy keeping a woman captive because he thinks she's trying to baby trap him, chastity belt included.
Mila Finelli's Kings of Italy series. Italian mafia. The third book especially is on the darker side to me, as it probably has the highest amount of dubcon. The heroes are all murderers, there's a good bit of torture, defiant heroines (and an m/m assassin/target romance).
Run, Posy Run by Cate C. Wells. Italian-American mafia. The hero is in this situationship with the heroine that honestly isn't even good for her at all lmao, and is sent a video of her cheating on him. She assumes he's going to murder her and goes on the run... and then he finds out that the video was doctored. I mean, it's a softer touch, but still pretty dark.
Anne Stuart wrote dark historical romances--A Rose at Midnight is honestly one of the darkest books I've read. Intensely horrific Reign of Terror content. A really, really horrible (in a good way) hero. Tons of trauma. TW TW TW TW for like, murder, dubcon, noncon, near-suicide, violence on and off the page... It's dark.
Then of course... Sierra Simone. Some people categorize New Camelot as dark; I'd say it's very VERY high stakes, but I wouldn't necessarily call anyone involved horrible enough in the main trio to be dark. It has a lot of dark points, but I don't know if it's dark romance.
However, her Ivy Leavold series and her Molly O'Flaherty books skirt towards dark historicals, and I would say that Thornchapel is definitely dark, on the Gothic side. It's basically like... a pseudo-magical (light magic) series that feels a lot like Donna Tartt's The Secret History, but with orgies, and rituals, and that One Taboo That Romance Very Rarely Crosses. (Yes. THAT one.) Nobody's truly evil, but a lot of people are very fucked up, and it has some scenes that are downright Midsommar-y.
I would also say that while Salt Kiss didn't feel like a dark romance to me, Honey Cut definitely put us in that space lmao. She ramped up in a BIIIIIG way. Like. That book had one of the darkest consensual sex scenes I've ever read (and I LOOOOOOOOOOOOVED it). Just some really twisted relationships and high stakes. Which again. LOVE. Everyone read Sierra Simone!
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totally random question man have you heard about this thing called the markiplier cinematic universe (mcu for short)
I'm going literally obliterate you I know where you live (I'm currently entering in you coordinates to the president's nuke)
I wanna try and say this shit without getting wildly off topic and I'm praying that Tumblr doesn't have a word cap but also low key hoping it does to put an end to this because I'm not sure I have a stopping point, but be warned, underneath the cut is my LONGEST rant yet
Starting with some background knowledge of "the birth" or Darkiplier versus "the birth" of Wilford Warfstache
Darkiplier was truly born from an internet meme of edgy people seeing people like Markiplier and Jacksepticeye and such making "edgy jokes" and "acting deranged" because at the time on youtube that was seen as funny and comical (similar but not the same as when Pink Guy was around and people thought he was the height of comedy at the time but the skit being retired by the creator because "it's not funny anymore, get over it", except Mark brought it a different life rather than killing off the character entirely, instead of retiring the character he gave it meaning, think like how you make an edgelord OC as a kid but later think of a really good backstory for it and end up revamping the entire OC instead something not even remotely related anymore)
So the community latched onto that idea and started calling him "DARK iplier" because we as human are incredibly creative
I say, knowing "markiplier" is just Mark and Multiplier combined
Which brings me to how Wilford Warfstache was created, actually
Wilford was created for the express purpose of things like "The Slenderman Interview" and "Wilford Plays: Slender" (warning: very early YT jokes that wouldn't fly today lol), he was created to do funny skits for games Mark would play as Mark's reason for naming his channel "Mark Multiplier" is because he wanted to make skits of the characters in the games he would play, making his channel a half gaming channel and a half skit channel which was honestly ingenius ingenuity, he had the fortune of taking a chance with two genres that ended up being VERY successful on early youtube and that is one of the biggest reasons why his channel is so big today
which is also just incredibly insane to think about that he has managed to have very little if not any controversies within his channel and community, at least not any GENUINE concerns he hasn't already alleviated
And for the most that's all these characters were: completely separate parts of Mark's channels where are Darkiplier would only appear in Mark's more "edgier" videos and Wilford purely in skits
That is until his video "Don't Blink", whic was also featured in his much later series: "A Date with Markiplier" where we see Darkiplier in his own video rather than some edgy joke made online and his first "official" appearance and is around the time when people began to refer to the different personas Mark had online as his "egos"
In the video we see Dark slowly fade in to the dark background of the picture that's posted on screen (and this is why I get kinda upset when Lixian, Mark's editor, is attributed to the image alternation horror of Mark's series as this has ALWAYS been a staple of Mark's channel - Lixian fucking hits it out of the park with his editorial and atristry stills, don't get me wrong, he's a true artist when it comes to that kind of horror, but he didn't create it on Mark's channel, it's always been a thing and you can always tell who is new to the channel with this)
But we don't see much of Dark's actual attire and how he looks anymore than he's a one to one comparison of Mark just a creepier, edgier version of him, I mean, he doesn't even get his iconic grayscale self yet ! "Don't Move" is technically the first time we see that but I don't count it since the entire video is in grayscale, I would kinda attribute the first "Dark is in Graysclae" sighting to the "October of Terror" video he did explaining his charity event but I wouldn't say it's officially attributed to him then, I think it was more of a "putting him in grayscale brings out the drastic lighting contrast and makes it look spooky" versus it actually being apart of his character design, because I don't think Dark was "officially" introduced until "Mr. Kitty Saves the World" where he actively brings up Darkiplier as an entity and not just him being edgy to get views (but also is being edgy to get views lol)
But what I find interesting is in that video it says "Containment Breach" which is because this was roughly a year after Mark started playing SCP: Containment Breach and suggests that Darkiplier was originally supposed to be an SCP !! That's super fucking cool to me that Dark went from being edgelord to being an SCP to being "I'm super tortured but like mentally and physically my body can't even stay in one piece" (which is funny cause Antisepticeye, which yes I'm bringing up cause they're intertwined just by the nature of Mark and Jack being friends and their egos happening at the same time and in tandem with each other thanks to the "Darkiplier VS. Antisepticeye" video, went from being edgelord jokes to I'm fucked up an evil to SCP but different flavor,, which like yeah it's a joke video and is seen widely as noncanonical but it still applies to how they are connected if just by similarities between them)
But within the community, Darkiplier isn't officially an ego or real character until "Best Friends Forever", which is widely hypothesized or accepted to be Dark in the video because, again, edgelord humor, though in my eyes it's not until "relax" is released that Darkiplier is officially considered a character because this video shows that he is a different entitiy than Mark and he's also given an official outfit,,, plus it's his 14MIL milestone so I figured this would be the perfect time to canonicize Darkiplier as an official Markiplier Ego :)
I also think this was another video featured in ADwM (A Date with Markiplier) if I remember correctly
The "relax" video is also when we see him trying to torture Mark and not just other people or being generally edgy and this later is Dark's main character plot point is to kill or hurt Mark (specifically "Actor" Mark, or otherwise Mark's characterization on screen, the character seperate from the creator,,, which is why I now have grown away from Septiplier (DO NOT ASK I WAS FUCKING ELEVEN) because "Actor Mark" is the characterization of Markiplier in my eyes, and that man does not deserve to be in any relationship, I like seeing him blue balled for all of eternity thank you) so that in my eyes is the best point of "yes Dark is an actual character now"
But this video is also why I don't think the earlier installments of Dark being in grayscale are when that officially becomes a character trait, as in later episodes after the previously mentioned with that characteristic are just heavily saturated photos or clips of Mark and aren't grayscaled, it's not until his ADwM series that Dark is oficially attributed this trait as whenever he's seen onscreen and the screen (and later just himself) switches to grayscale
Now, the introduction of Wilford Warfstache is wildly different but is the last Ego I'll be giving a timeline of (at least a very detailed one) because all the others are usually one off or are more recently added into the series and only show up fully fleshed out when they're first mentioned so I don't have to do a deep archive dive for them lol
Wilford, like I said earlier, was always a character, always supposed to be seen as such at the very least, and isn't just some "silly voice Mark sometimes does" but is definitely where his voice comes from, as it seems vastly different for the purpose of trying to differinciate the two of them and why it's a lot easier to do so versus how it was with Darkiplier as Dark and Mark, until more recently, sounded - and even looked - very much the same
Wilford is first seen in his Amnesia Series, the video of which I can't QUITE remember and I'm not about to search the entire fucking series just to figure out which one was his first appearance, but one of the earliest times he's name dropped is in "Amnesia: Rain - Part 6", but even then he's fully kitted out with his pink mustache and all (I think this video was supposed to be an April Fools video, but that's too on brand for Wilford Warfstache for me to think it wasn't more than just "it would be funny teehee", it definitely was but I feel like Mark was also thinkin "it would also be perfect to show off this kooky character" because like I said, Wilford was low-key planned from the beginning of Mark's channel,,, not specifically but his concept was)
But me personally I wouldn't see him as an official character until "The Warfstache Affair" which is one of the funniest fucking videos to me, even to this day and is such a silly video all on it's own, but this is his first appearance in my heart of hearts because, like Dark's need to torture Mark, this becomes one of Wilford's key character plot points later down the line
And when I say that Mark truly turns these characters from funny skit plot points to full fledged, series bingeworthy characters you want to see have a happy ending, I MEAN IT
His love for the creative process and writing shows through in his "official" series or skits, in his "official" MCU, it's literally insane. You can tell he loves these characters and truly wants to write a story and is the sole reason I think that, bias aside for the nostalgia and special place in my heart that FNaF has on me, Mark's Iron Lung movie is going to be SO MUCH BETTER than ANYTHING the FNaF movie could do
I love FNaF's storyline (and it's crazy how long it took me to mention FNaF in a MARKIPLIER related rant but it was bount to happen) and I think it's incredibly intricate, and it's very similar to Mark's MCU where it started off simple but get deeper as it gains more traction, where it's different is Scott Cawthon rushed a lot of his games and whatnot due to popularity, because of the fear that if he didn't pump it out fast enough it would lose traction and he'd lose his fame, whereas Mark not only had the security of that not happening, he also does not care if it did happen - he doesn't do these skits to appease people, he does them because he enjoys it, something's he's said a hundred times by now. Yes, because of the support he has he's able to make the story look very good, but fans or no fans the story would be the same, it would just look a lot different
Back to the timeline of events in the MCU, we don't techincally see the other Egos "introduced" or "canonicized" until "Markiplier TV", which even that can be argued due to both the irrelevantness and obvious of how one off of characters they were as well as Cyndago's unfortunate attempt at ending his own life and Mark taking it upon himself to not continue the characters he created so as to not disrespect Cyndago's legacy or "take away" those characters from him
But this is the first time we see Wilford and Darkiplier actually interact with each other, and is where that "Darkstache" ship REALLY took off
It's hard to say is people really shipped it beforehand, and if they did it was definintely considered a crackship or rarepair due to that exact fact of these characters never interacting up until Markiplier TV
I will always hold Markiplier TV in my heart, I remember frothing at the mouth when it came out and it was 100% what got me so autistically attached to Markiplier, I mean besides FNaF, but that was more of a "I can't wait to come home from school and watch my favorite YouTuber!" thing, and MTV (which yes I see the joke in that) was more of "OH MY GOD IF HE DOESN'T EXPLAIN WHAT THIS MEANS AND WHY DARK ONLY USES A NICKNAME ON WILFORD I'M GOING TO CLAW OFF MY SKIN OH MY GODDDDDDD"
Which by the way that happens, he calls him "Will" and that's NEVER EXPLAINED ???? I DON'T THINK ??? But this is the only person he refers to in any endearing way
(side note I wanted to add: intro to MTV has a Lantern reference in there,,, I know you (Shran, the person who asked this) is the only one who will understand that joke, but if you ever end up watching it: timestamp: 0:16, truly a blink and you'll miss it moment tho)
Also this series is the introduction to a character who later becomes canon: The Jim Twins,, though we're not sure if it stops at just twins as the joke is like all of the news anchors, castors, camera men, weather men, etc. are all named Jim,,, and because they occur again as an easter egg in "Who Killed Markiplier?" (not directly in,, but there was a website you could go to when WKM was airing and you could see them post extra, joking, content that also lowkey gave hints to the story but didn't directly interfere with the actual show so you didn't need to watch it) that I think made them canon as they're shown to be on set at the same time as canon characters (because ALL of WKM is canon, unlike MTV)
Also also MTV is where the popular headcanon that Wilford cries bubbles comes from ! (I can't not bring my other hyperfixations into this - Tom has a similarly popular headcanon where his tears are either black and/or smell/taste like pineapple juice)
MTV is 100% where I get my "random noises" stim that I do, by the way, where I just do the tune of songs I know with wildly incorrect words,,, and now that I think about is probably why I'm able to so clearly remember my friend's meme parody of "I Write Sins Not Tragedies" but every other word is rat: "I Rat Sins Not Tragedies"
Fucking hell Middle School was a different time I'm not sad to be gone from it
In other news the gag joke of Wilford casually pulling out a gun and shooting someone with it kills me every fucking time (literally I'm currently dead on the floor unmoving he's shot me sendf an damnbuclance)
Anyway back to the actual plot of MCU, this is also where we get the actual first introduction of Wilford's character trait of being beyond the screen he's played on, as he's seen manipulating text on screen shown to not really be "all there" for lack of a better term, being an enigma who doesn't understand the concept of death, and personally that was why I originally started the enjoy their character dynamic because it made sense to me that Dark would want to befriend someone who didn't care for murder when he wanted Mark to die so obviously Wilford is the natural choice, but I didn't think for Wilford to have such a FUCKING MESSED UP REASON BEHIND IT MARK I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU MADE ME WANNA THROW HANDS WITH A FICTIONAL VERSION OF YUOR PERSONIFIED EGO I'M GOING TO RIP YOU APART !!! I WOULD NOT LIKE TO APOLOGIZE !!! I STICK BY IT !!!!!!
Also I think it's very funny that MTV canonicized that Santa is, in fact, still dead from when Wilford killed him in I think a charity live stream ?? I may be getting my memory mixed up but I think for one of Mark's Christmas Chairty Livestreams he had Wilford kill Santa Claus as a milestone reward ?? I'm not quite sure but I have a very vivid memory of Santa with his face blurred out for "security reasons" being suddenly executed by Wilford as like an interview thing,, but that could've been made afterwards as a joke reference to this clip lol, either way Santa is canonically murdered and Christmas is ruined forever by Wilford and I think that's fucking hilarious
For those who watched MTV or are watching it after this rant to see what I'm talking about let me explain every ego shown in the boardroom scene of this video and it's got nothing to do with me wanting to flex my obscure knowledge I have of Markiplier's channel:
Wilford and Dark don't count I've talked about them before
Googleiplier (Seen with in a blue shirt with the Google logo on it): comes from a skit done with Matthias called "Google IRL" in which Google comes out with an android version of Google Home to help with every day assistance, but what Matthias fails to know is that Google IRL is actually incredibly evil and is trying to kill Matthias
Ed Edgar (cowboy with the world's least flattering mullet,,, and that's saying something): Cyndago's character from the "Ed Edgar's Adoptallott's Baby Bulk Buy", where he tries to sell his son
Bim Trimmer (other guy in the suit also yes his name is a joke on Bum Trimmer): Another one of Cyndago's characters from the "Hire My Ass!" skit where Bim brutally murders and cannibalizes his contests (surprisingly unsurprisingly a fan favorite character)
Silver Shepherd (the alien looking motherfucker): Yet another one of Cyndago's characters from the "Super Infidelity" skit, where you can assume what happens; superhero marital affairs (this character is not be confused with how Jacksepticeye's Jackie-Boy Man came into creation, that was from a superhero maker (? ish) game)
Dr. Iplier: Heavily debated if it's Cyndago's character since it was posted to Mark's channel, I'll call him a Cyndago character since it's under the pretense of being a "Cyndago Original", even though people say he comes back in "In Space with Markiplier", he kinda really doesn't because that's Porniplier (LET ME EXPLAIN- PLEASE I TALK ABOUT HIM MORE LATER), but he gets first introduced in the skit "Worst News Doctor" with the same running joke as seen in MTV of "I'm sorry but... you're dying" to the most mundane of ailments
The Host (the guy with the bloody bandaged around his eyes): One of my favorite Cyndago skit characters, he comes from "Danger in Fiction", a skit parody of "Stranger Than Fiction" (at least the name is,,, I haven't actually seen Stranger Than Fiction lol), where he's first introduced as "The Author" (insert Gravity Falls joke here)
King of the Squirrels (Guy who runs in with peanut butter smeared on his face): Joke ego who came around in the same vein of Tiny Box Tim but instead it was introduced somewhere in Mark's "Don't Starve" playthrough, again, not watching the entire series again to remember where he first mentions him
The canonicity of the TV show though is flimsy at best as there is a Septiplier joke where he's begging to be killed and like 90% of the heads of the table are Cyndago's characters, but I think it is important to bring up because this, in my eyes, is the start of Markiplier actually trying to give his characters some depth to them and wanting to explore them more than JUST skits, or at the very least this is the last time they're seen in skits and treated as just egos and not seperate characters
When we ACTUALLY see the timeline somewhat officially begin is in "A Date with Markiplier"
Yes it technically airs before Markiplier TV but it didn't really have Wilford in it, and I wanted to get that last Wilford knowledge out there because Markiplier TV marks where the skit Timeline ends and the for realsies time line begins, the reason ADwM comes after this despite airing before it is because it technically wasn't supposed to be canon, and only became canon once "A Heist with Markiplier" come out because this is when Mark creates his "Adventures with Markiplier" series, canonicizing ADwM
With that out of the way, ADwM is where we see a lot more of Dark's character specifically, because again this is kinda not super canonical but more canonical than MTV, as it was made as a Valentine's Day joke post (Fun fact: The whole "Movie" portion of the date where we see Mark do a one man play is to make up for all of his broken "Markiplier Promises" to Ethan CrankGamePlays/Ethan Nestor and Tyler Apocalypto_12) but it IS the first time we get introduce to "Actor Mark" as a seperate character who becomes very important later on in the timeline with the next installment:
Who Killed Markiplier
My precious
My Favorite
Right after In Space but we'll get to that
Speaking of Reoccuring Characters introduced in ADwM: The Chef !! He comes back in WKM AND A Heist ! I fucking love this guy
Okay before I continue I need to preface something:
This is not where the actual timeline technically begins,,, it really begins with In Space but to explain that I need to explain this first because... by technicality this entire series? Like the entirity of the canonical MCU? Time loop. Thank you Mark for making me want to [REDACTED]
For the ease of me not jumbling shit together, I'm going to give a brief synopsis of every Chapter of WKM,,, I have no idea what I'm gonna do for Heist and Space but we'll see
Chapter 1
Another Lantern Reference at 0:14
We enter the fray as Y/N or better known as the District Attorney (DA for short), as we see on our invitation letter, meeting our main characters:
William J. Barnum, "The Colonel"
Damien Doom, "The Mayor"
Abe, "The Detective", and
Mark, "The Actor" and "The Victim"
Other noteable characters are:
The Chef and The Butler, played by Robert Rexx and Tyler Schneid respectively (Side note again: Why is every butler ever in the history of forever always gay?)
The time period in which this is set in is the 1920's, no specific date I don't think, but the 20s no less, (because of the time period you're offered a seltzer with cocaine in it to help subside your headache, I fucking love Mark's humor jesus)
The reason we're all gathered in the manor is because the Mark Iplier (Canon Last Name I believe) has invited us all to a celebratory party at his manor, in which we are all to get absolutely shitfaced and party, during which we have the most banging music playing in the background, we learn our beloved Mayor is King of the Keg, we get the first tease that William and Abe have history and don't rather like each other, at least in a one sided manner as Barnum playfully puts Abe in a headlock and Abe is NOT having it, we see William has violent tendencies trying to swing at the Butler now acting as bartender, William is also seen playing Russian Roulette, before we pass out in bed at 1:30 AM before waking up seven hours later only to find that our beloved friend, Mark, has died. But not only died - but has been MURDERED ! So says the detective
Thanks to a convenient lightning storm trapping everyone inside the house, which also seems to only strike anytime someone says the word "murder", Abe take it upon himself to take charge with you as his assistant and quarantines everyone inside the house until he can figure out what happened, and after rectally taking the corpse's body temperature Abe is able to determine Mark was murder just as you went to bed: 1:30 AM.
Later we see Damien and William fighting, Damien suspecting William of being the one who murdered Mark or at least being suspicious of him as they've had prior disagreements and seem to hate each other, though William swears he didn't do it and instead suggests Mark slipped and fell because he's a dumb idiot
It's also revealed that the Chef's "Little Buddy" is actually a security camera and has recorded the entire night, showing that Abe and Mark talked earlier, discussing the fact that Abe was invited to do background checks on Mark's staff conveniently at the same time as when the murder took place,,, hmm,,, at 1:13 AM, seven minutes before the murder
And then suddenly, we end on Abe announcing that the body had just suddenly disappeared
Also I'd love to add the bonus contents of what happened on the WKM website but it was taken down like shortly after the last chapter of the series aired, so I can't exactly give a play by play of what happened. Just know like how I said earlier it's just the Jim Twins being goofy (I vividly remember them playing with a oujia board rug going "S-U-B-S-C-R-I-B-E-T-O-M-A-R-K-I-P-L-I-E-R" which is still really funny to me but that's basically all the substance they gave,,, save for giving up a better look at the manor layout and rooms we didn't get to see much of in the official chapters) but like I said they're very inconsequential the main story so there's no harm other than me having one less thing to talk about which at this point is doing more good than anything
Chapter 2
We reiterate that the body's moved, seemingly on it's own, as we have the house residents find out one by one in the same (or at least roughly the same) order as they found out that the body was dead. Also William is revealed to believe in zombies (it IS the 20s) and also makes a "The Most Dangerous Game" reference (it IS the 20s,,, also in the outfit he was wearing it and who his character is it was bound to happen) before offering to kill Actor!Mark again if he truly is a zombie and justifies it with "well back in the war"
After Abe makes his nth homoerotic joke of the series he poses the question of: why? What's the killer's motive ? What do they gain from Actor being dead ? He reiterates that we were all invited here for a celebration but it was never specified what kind of celebration, not even Mark's grand "what we're celebrating" speech he didn't actually explain what they were celebrating, just that it wasn't about any in particular or himself which, obviously at this point, was a lie because he's dead so he was always going to be the main event
We also get that, after Abe probing Actor's ass, he found out that not only was he stabbed 37 times, Actor was also poisoned, beaten, strangled, drowned and shot - in that order. This is my favorite thing about this entire series because I remember making a ton of theories about this and what this meant because there's no way the killer did that in one night and it heavily suggested that Mark had died multiple times, on account of the fact that he was "drowned" and then later "shot" but the corpse we see is dry and isn't asphyxiated at all like he would be if he were strangled or drowned
And then my theories were blown out of the water when In Space came out so fuck me I guess
To be fair they weren't totally solid and at best were headcanons lol
Back to the main events of the story: we're introduced to Actor's room which is a MESS, truly it looks like a hurricane went through it, and as much as it seems like that would be the place he died within a struggle, Abe quickly dismisses that and urges us to continue looking when we find that he has multiple pictures frames of the friends in vairous amounts... First it's the three of them: Mark, William and Damien. They all seem super happy and in the photo they're laughing and causing a rukus. next there's suddenly four of them: Mark, William, Damien and Celine (I will get to her later), and they look less happy, well, for the most part. Damien and William and standing like the man emoji and it could be because William came back from war is like whoo boy do I have trauma and Damien could getting a little more stressed with mayoral duties but it's never quite clear, all we know is that Damien and William are straight faced whereas Celine and Mark and Celine are chatting it up like old friends. Continuing we see a third photo of just Damien and Mark together, Damien looking like he's giving his best customer service smile and Mark maybe looks anxious ? It's hard to tell, there's a glare on the glass of the frame for most of the shot
However, the last one we see is turned over and the glass is smashed, revealing a picture of William alone.
But the scene continues and William reveals that Mark has quite the amount of enemies, it's not just him who has a mysterious gripe with the bitch before Damien pulls us away to discuss who the murderer might be, instead bringing to the metaphorical magnifying glass to the Detective who we've been following around
Throughout the entire series we have fingers pointed at Abe and William the most, William with his violent tendencies and hatred for the victim, and Abe for the fact we know the least about him (within the immediate friendgroup but because he's also just kind of a reclusive guy)
Before he can continue with eluding to the idea that maybe there was one more person among them we hear a gunshot and glass break, revealing Abe and the Colonel pointing guns at each other and screaming. We hear that William was trying to use Abe for target practice as they are accusing each other of being the murderer, making their way to the door where we get a late arrival:
Celine.
Chapter 3
I said I'd get to her and I've gotten to her
Whoo
Fucking
Nelly
Listen before I continue this I will say I have a bias cause I AM HER BIGGEST HATER I HATE HER FUCKKKK
As an actress, she played phenomincally, Pamela Horton does a fantastic job playing her
As a character, beautifully written, I enjoy occult like characters and her title as "The Seer" is perfect, brings that mist of supernatural and mystery that surrounds Mark's untimely death wonderfully
As a person
As someone I could meet on the streets
I want to [REDACTED] until [REDACTED] so that she [REDACTED] and I won't stop until [REDACTED] and [REDACTED] or so help me.
That aside let's actually get the synopsis/play by play
The house guests fill Celine in on what happened and the fact that Mark's dead, but also she is the first person to bring up the fact that the lightning strikes everytime someone says the word "murder", what passed as a running gag is now pulled into question for possibly being supernatural as she proclaims it to be "powerful dark magic" for lightning to strike EVERYTIME someone says the word "murder"
Also William canonically was sucked into the board game Jumanji so via the pipeline he's connected to Dwayne the Rock Johnson which I think is pretty funny
Celine then proposes that they all hold a seance to speak with Mark beyond the grave to get an answer as to why this is all happening where she shuts down Abe and the Butler makes another gay ass remark to us before Celine proclaims we're trustworthy and have a "far greater part to play" which is hella suspicious, thank you Celine, and everyone pretty much agrees with the Detective that it's suspicious that Celine suddenly wants to take us on alone to get more answers and take the investigation further. Well, everyone except William.
Simp.
But it doesn't matter cause we end up going with her anywhere where Damien tries to talk to her about this and offer comfort but also wonders what she's doing getting mixed up with the muder, but the way he phrases it: "I just didn't think you were the type to get mixed up with all this" makes me think that he's actually talking about the occult and medium stuff she's been doing or at least suddenly announces that she's doing, where she argues that there's more to this world that he could ever understand and then continues to run off with us to seperate room of the house
There we see her lay out tarot cards and whatnot before making a "Series of Unfortunate Events" joke, and before anyone asks I don't think the layout of her cards and what cards are where means anything - I know in Tarot that that's like SUPER IMPORTANT but I do not think Mark poured hours of research into tarot for this one scene. But also because there's a magic eight ball there, as a joke yeah, but I mean c'mon
Shockingly enough though, as we're sitting in the room with Celine we start to have visions about what's happening, what's happened, and what's about to happen, or the past present and future, so she asks us to draw it down where we meet our second late arriving gueststar:
The Groundskeeper.
But she doesn't seem pleased with our answer and orders us to go back into our visions before she's interrupted by Abe and Damien where Damien seems very concerned with her affiliation with the occult and the fact she's become very volatile before Abe rushes us out and leaved Damien to try and calm down Celine
The Chef reveals that the Groundskeeper, previously thought to only work on weekends, actually has been living on the grounds secretly, so naturally they go to him to investigate where he was during the murder - except they get interrupted by the only reason he'd ever go into that house after he says "You'd better pray to god that that reason never comes to pass" before it happens, all of them rushing inside to see red and blue light shining onto Celine with the most ominous Debbie Ryan smirk known to man before they close the door on her
Chapter 4 - The Final Chapter
We see the groundskeeper lock the door to the room Celine and Damien were both last seen in before William runs in asking where Celine is where the groundskeeper explains that "she's gone, and so is everyone else"
PAUSE
I feel it's important to note that in order to keep true to the timeline as we are OFFICIALLY in the timeline now, I have to talk about "DAMIEN", because as Mark explains, DAMIEN, although premiering after the WKM series, does happen DURING it, specifically after Celine and Damien disappear, but before we see them again later (which I will be explaining later after this cause duh in my Chapter 4 analysis)
We open in on being stuck in a dead winter, trees barren and their roots buried deep under snow, following the sound of a tree getting hacked into, before finally crackling and falling to the floor where we see a heavily breathing Mayor Damien, hair long and dressed in a thick winter coat
After he's done sledding his chopped down logs back to a cabin and chopping them into fire wood we see Celine in the house with him where they start bickering and this is where we see just how truly different their personalities are:
"I saw a flower today, shouldn't be long before Spring is here"
"OR there's still a few more weeks of Winter and that flower will die COLD and ALONE."
There's more bickering, mainly from Celine's side, before she goes out hunting for food now that Damien's back home but there is a moment of tenderness before she leaves, where she asks if he really did see a flower where he says "yes, a little pink one... though it's probably dead by now" and she wishes for him to get some rest
Just as we see Damien head to bed, we watch the window panes freeze and the screen glitch, watching Damien's body from the outside of the window before the next morning starts and we see the pink flower again
If you wanna know it's a Sweet William and that is the loudest part of this entire series as Damien goes "Huh... Well you don't die easily, do you?"
And we begin to hear the echoes of "Wilford Wilford Motherlovin' Warfstache"
I'M NOT GONNA PAUSE IT AGAIN I PROMISE
Wilford Motherlovin' Warfstache, while heard in DAMIEN , doesn't technically happen until AFTER Chapter 4 of WKM is done, Wilford is just a fucking enigma to time and space so he's heard throughout the echoes of time
Also DAMIEN was shot after Wilford Motherlovin' Warfstache so they had the audio lol
But according to the timeline WMLW doesn't happen until AFTER the events of WKM and DAMIEN happened DURING the events of WKM so, continuining on
Damien continues to hear the voices of Abe and Wilford peaking through the vast forest, growing confused, concerned and anxious before he just decided to keep on chopping, chalking it up to "just another day in the life of me" I guess
As Damien comes inside for the second day, we hear Celine say the same line of "Don't slam the door, Damien" and Damien continues the similarities with proclaiming how he saw a flower and it "shouldn't be long until Spring" before he trails off, realizing he said the same thing yesterday
He mutters along with Celine as she says the same line as she did yesterday, furthering the notion that they've been through this before, so he breaks the chain with Celine like how the voice broke the chain with him, claiming he heard a voice today which instantly gets Celine on edge before she says she's going out "hunting" again, with a much different tone
Instead of going to sleep right after Celine leaves like he did last time, Damien stays up long enough to watch as the window panes freeze over, a voice whispering Damien's name before he jerks his head to the left, noticing a mirror on the wall to his left, noting how he can't see himself in the reflection of it, and when he manges to make out the outline of himself in the mirror, it reveals itself to be a rotting version, telling him that it's time to wake up (directly opposing what Celine's been telling him to do: go to sleep)
When he opens his eyes again he's back in the woods, confused on how he got there - he was just in his cabin and now he's in the middle of the woods where he hears Celine calling for him
In distress, he immediately runs after the voice, trying to find his sister only for the snow to get thicker and the wind to get stronger, like it's actively trying to keep him from his sister as they keep yelling for each other
He makes it to a frozen lake when the voice stops calling for him, noticing foot prints on a lake he's never seen before leading to a bright light in the lake where he reaches into a hole, fishing Celine out of the lake where he sees that face again that he saw in the mirror with the words taunting "it's not fair, is it?"
The corpse ends up grabbing Damien and tries pulling him while we watch the ice crack and break beneath him, images of a Sweet William and various skulls flash on screen before Damien gives a distorted scream, falling into the black abyss of the frozen lake's water
When Damien regains his bearings, we're in a dark void where we see none other than the man himself:
Mark
He taunts Damien and how hard it was to find him, telling him that he's only come to apologize to him where Damien wonders if he even ever knew him, but manages to slowly bring back his memory of what happened, remembering that it's Actor standing before him and everything he's done
Side note, the line "Celine really did a number on you didn't she?" solidifies my earlier comment on Celine wanting Damien to go to sleep whereas Mark is trying to get him to wake up, wanting Damien to stay in the loop
He also makes a joke about "knowing [Mark] as well as he knows [himself]" which is a joke about how he's snatched Damien's body and is now living in it - hence how we see him in the same Tuxedo Damien wore at the party with his cane, except for the fact it's red now instead of black
Mark continues to explain how this kind of went downhill and not how he wanted it to go, that yes this WAS planned from the beginning by him but as the events unfolded it didn't go according to plan, "right people point the finger at the wrong people" as he puts it "mistakes were made"
Also it's eluded that Actor made a deal with the devil to make sure Celine didn't "go around breaking anyone else's heart", but it's not explicitly said, just that he made a deal to make sure that it didn't happen, we're not sure if it's with a supernatural force but we can assume that it is based off everything that's happened
Mark continues his speech about how every "good story needs a villain and a hero", suggesting that he thinks himself of the hero in this story and he needs a vindictive villain to fight against, someone to root for their downfall by the audience, and honestly the scene is beautiful, beautifully written, beautifully preformed, beautifully drawn which yes, by the way, DAMIEN was drawn as an Animatic style video, not live action like how the rest of Mark's content is for the MCU, but oh my gOD it's so beautiful
And in a terrifying scene, we see Damien slowly suffocating as he realizes that he's actually been dead the whole time before Celine breaks past the barrier Mark had put up (the frozen lake, they're beneath it) and ends up killing Actor, seeing his face contort into the Comedy Mask as he's blown away like ash
A third Lantern reference when Damien goes "I'm so sick of being a pawn in other people's games" as he begs Celine to explain what the hell just happened, truly at his wit's end with all of this but she denies it, she claims that everything she's done she's done for Damien, that this whole state of constant repitition was to keep Damien safe and secure but now Actor's come and torn it all apart
There's a really tender moment between Celine and Damien where they talk about how Celine doesn't need to basically give up her life to protect Damien's, that she doesn't need to spend the rest of her life trying to fix the mistakes she's made, where he offers his hand to help her
And she agrees,
On the condition that he "makes sure that bastard stays dead."
Before they're swallowed up by the lake flooding in from the cracks Actor made on their "world", and as the water gushes out of the door is sweeps away the endless Winter and shows the blades of grass fighting to stay alive beneath the blankets of snow, and the countless amount of tress Damien has chopped down in the time he's lived there
After the credits roll we're left with a bonus clip of Damien stepping out from the destroyed house, where there was once snow now the earth burns under his boots before he walks off screen
This video was actually cut for time by the way, there was supposed to be a whole nother day where we see the Sweet William blossoming again to give the sense of repetitiveness and endlessness
But I think that Wilford's cry out in the abyss along with the Sweet William is what broke him from the limbo cycle and was why they were able to break free
UNPAUSE
After this, everyone begins to leave, quitting their jobs and imploring the others to take their leaves as well but William swears against it, threatening to kill everyone unwilling to die with the friend's he just lost in this house
Abe follows after the Colonel because of his threat where we're left alone to have the screen ominously loses it's hue along with the song in the background distorting before we hear a heartbeat and a whisper asking for help that sounds awfully familiar hmm (I'm like 90% sure it's Celine's voice)
We begin to hear distorted talk about "Madness" and how it's "stealing your best friend's wife" before we continue to hear distorted versions of Mark's speech to us in the first Chapter and voice lines from the rest of the cast as we walk around the manor, lead to a room we've yet to enter where we see our screen go back to normal
In the room we find that this filled with news letters of a "Safari gone wrong" with William at the forefront of it as well as a cork coard of red string and loose ends.
Important stuff to note from this room:
A paper filled with the word "colonel" messily scribbled all over it
A layout picture of the house
The aforementioned "Safari Gone Wrong" Magazine cover
^ the top line of this also asks is Mayor Damien is secretly a demon in disguise
Stickynotes saying "DON'T TRUST" "THE SEER"
Not important but I think it's funny: Picture of William with a sticky note saying "Not Marriage Material"
Multiple News headlines proclaiming Mark's death (but previously to this, obviously)
A typewriter filled with speculation against the colonel before it too gets chaotic
After we have a run through of the room we see William walk into the room and is immediately put off by it, exclaiming that Abe's been keeping tabs on us, but mostly it's just him and Celine, we're ambivelant to this, but it suggests that because Abe and him were good friends, he probably was hired as a private investigator on Celine for the express purpose of finding out if she's having an affair on him, hence why he's been keeping tabs on mostly William and Celine (they've had an affair on each other as earlier stated with the voice saying that "madness is cheating with your Bestie's wife" and the fact that Colonel's first worry is Celine which is odd as he's seen tender to her but willing to deck anyone else over less than she's done)
After finding out this knowledge, William blames Abe for this and believes that this was a ploy to ruin him, that Abe had set him up from the beginning where he clearly begins to spiral and he begins searching for Abe to kill him getting increasingly more and more violent until he ends up accidentally shooting Abe right in the chest, and soon after you meet the same fate as you try to calm him down, falling off the balcony
As the screen fades to black we hear that heartbeat again and we suddenly see Mark's dead body once more, signfiying that this is after the events of "DAMIEN", that is until the body of Mark looks gaunt, or at least shift to look like Darkiplier saying "It's not fair, is it?"
We're met with Damien and Celine in their red and blue forms where they explain what happened in DAMIEN (briefly, anyway) that Actor had trapped them in this state of limbo or some inbetween where they were stuck doing the same day over and over with seeminly no difference where Celine breaks that she thought it was the house causing it but it was actually Mark and Damien explains that Actor is walking around in Damien's body
The two of them propose that everyone in this odd state of liminal nothingness can escape the same way Mark did before suddenly we wake up, assumably back in our own body
This is where we get my most gut wrenching scene I HATE YOU MARKIPLIER WHY DO YOU THIS TO ME
We see William sitting in a chair by where our body once was, coat and hat gone while he's anxiously clutching Damien's cane and we see William go from spiraling to downright mad as he convinces himself that he didn't kill you, obviously he wouldn't he cherishes your friendship, and begins to believe - genuinely believe that death does not exist, that there is no such thing and that everyone in the manor was playing some big prank on him, going around calling his friends' names while we stop to look at ourselves in the mirror only to find that we have become Darkiplier
I want this motherfucker dead, I want a ten paragraph apology for the way he changed my brain chemistry because of this how DARE he
But I do I like this series so much because it was my Umbrella Academy before Umbrella Academy was a thing, you know ? And is wildly better because the only incest being shipped is in the dark side of the fandom and not the canonicity of the show, but it has that same feeling of "We only get together for weddings and funerals", because to be frank, no one know why they're here, just that they're celebrating. Before this party they were all estranged from each other with few exceptions and with various reasons
For a good explanation, Damien's line:
"Then again, I'm not exactly sure as to what we're supposed ot be celebrating here. I mean it's good to have the gang back together, but... out of the blue like this seems... anyway,"
LIKE THAT'S NOT SUSPICIOUS AS HELL ???
Also, I feel it's important to note that in Mark's "Who Killed Markiplier" playlist on youtube he does add the bloopers but also "DAMIEN" and "Wilford Motherlovin' Warfstache" which I find very interesting but I think it's just because it's similar to the WKM series rather than the Adventures with Markiplier series even though they do tie in together
Fun fact about Wilford Motherlovin' Warfstache before I get into it: The name of it was originally gonna just be "Wilford Warfstache" in the same vein of DAMIEN is called just Damien's name, BUT when Abe's actor gives the somewhat improved line of "Wilford Motherlovin' Warfstache" Mark changed the title name to that cause he thought it better fit :)
This part of the WKM series is what inspired me to (eventually) write a mock script for a noir crime show surrounding Detective Abe, it was me and my partner joking about it on call together and then I got too much brainrot about it and ended up developing a plotline for three seasons that I need to write out eventually
With that aside, the video opens with Abe who we last saw shot by William, giving an internal monologue as he longing looks out the window with a cigarette in his mouth and Abe's first line already super gay so I'm waiting for the day Mark just goes "yeah Abe likes men" cause he's already confirmed Wilford is Pansexual I NEED ABE TO BE GAY PLEASE MARK
Ahem
Anyway
The monologue is pretty long, it's the entire intro to the video, and it's just a bunch of gay euphamisms and suggestive comments that Abe says as if he's unaware of the interpretations of it which I think is peak old noir films joke, and failing to stab the cork board multiple times - which wasn't planned, by the way, but was really really funny
Also Abe's suggested to be Jewish with the line "just like the clown at my bar mitzvah, I knew he was trouble from the moment I laid eyes on him", which is actually really cool ! Birthday clown terror is an obvious joke but the subtle change from birthday to bar mitzvah is nice, especially since Abe is a character from the 20s and it's easy to just write everyone as white and christian because, well, it's the 20s America, and I like when the cast is diverse (again, Wilford is canonically Pansexual which we were all waiting for with his pink and yellow ensemble, I love that "In Space With Markiplier" confirmed it with Mark explaining that the pink, yellow and blue lights seen in the secret Wilford scene wasn't accidental :))) !! )
Another fun fact: small budget films don't have to be poorly made ! Mark was getting a lot of praise from how the car Abe "drives" looks super realistic and people were wondering how he was doing that it really just came down to good editing and lightly shaking the car, literally they just were jostling the car from it's hood and it cave the illusion of driving on uneven roads which, if you've ever driven a car in america, is every road
As Abe's tobacco of choice keeps changing from cigarette to cigar to vape sticks, he explains how Wilford had gone through multiple aliases (later it's confirmed that he's sticking to Wilford Warfstache, obviously) but no matter how many times he's changed his name he would always fall back his usual dancing, fighting, flirting, and dancing - which brings us to where Abe finds him, the Moonlight Rollerway which is the most 80s fucking club ever
The scene also changes from noir black and white to bright, saturated colors as we see Wilford come onto screen with bopping funk music and a shiny pink shirt and matching afro as Abe gives the line that changes history "Wilford. Motherlovin'. Warfstache." and my brain literally explodes and I'm suddenly obsessed with Wilford for like months after the video comes out it's abysmal
Also, more pink, blue and yellow lights :) and yeah I know that pink and yellow are gonna go with blue because that's how triangles work but like, this motherfucker has been screaming pansexual since "The Ned Affair" which that video still makes me laugh and I kinda miss that outfit,, the entire video is gay jokes and as a gay person it's so funny
Back to WMLW, Abe disperses the party in order to get Wilford off stage and ends up accidentally shooting some electrical box I don't care for the proper term off, causing the music to stop and the saturation of the area to slightly dull as Wilford's dance comes to a stop and no one appreciates Abe's destruction of property when it killed the boogie
As Abe orders Wilford onto the ground, he claims to not remember who Abe was, asking for his name and failing to recall it multiple times while we see a second Wilford appear in the background, despite the fact that Abe is currently talking to the other one (yet another fun fact: the Wilford we see in the background of this disappears behind some tinsil curtains and we find out that this is actually connected to In Space, the room we see him again in directly connected to that which, holy fucking shit Mark what the hell these were produced like so long apart from each other,,, I mean I suppose they were written closely at the same time but what the butt man)
As Wilford claims he's never killed anyone, trying to get a sip out of martini glass he pulled literally out of the air, Abe tazes him and throws him into the back of his seat where we find out that Wilford, ever the enigma, can not only hear Abe's inner monologue but can internally comment on it as well, the both of them having an internal conversation much to Abe's shock and confusion - also Wilford continues to try to get a drink from his glass but never is able to :(
in Abe's panic he tazes Wilford again and next time we see them it's in the detective's office, Wilford bound to a chair in a cartoonish manner while he interrogates him, and it's when he accuses him for the murders he's commited and shows him red string board from Who Killed Markiplier that we see Wilford finally realize who he's talking to as he goes ".... A-.. Abe... Abe! Abe it's been years - how are you? How are you doing? How's the family?" and Abe loses it on Wilford, blaming him for everything that's gone wrong in his life in his pursuit to chase down Wilford (It's hilarious that this aired before my Lupin III hyperfixation because this is literally Zenigata and Lupin III, it's crazy, this video is literally why I had that obsession and it's insane to me - it all leads back to Markiplier, my pipeline is fucking linear at this point)
Wilford basically ignores Abe as he manages to get free from his binds as he refuses the law of nature and physics, staring at the wall with pictures and news paper clippings pinned about, and Wilford begins reminicing about the past and his sorrows - also he makes a joke about how Celine would "carve his heart out" which I think is a parallel to how Actor Mark said the same thing to Damien with a VERY different undertone
Also, we're getting close to the territory of where my absolutely infuriating hatred for how good Mark is at storytelling and leading us on and how well he knows his fanbase so fair warning to that, like how the screen has a rubberband glitch with a frame - ONCE, THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE FILM and it's when he's talking to Abe about how his memories tend to get jumbled and fuzzy from all the years and also probably the fact that space and time don't affect him properly anymore
But also Wilford starts to bring up memories, dismissing Abe's doubting or misremembering as things that "probably haven't happened yet", again, this man transends space and time I CAN'T
AUGHHHH
Wilford is an enigma and I love him for it he's chaotic whimsical
Later Abe, in a jumpscare as Wilford is suddenly in front of him shoots Wilford but it has absolutely no affect on him - we don't even see a gun shot wound or hole on his shirt as he gentle silences the gun and kisses it like it's some poor child, pushing it down to continue talking to a very terrifed Abe who's now questioning everything he knows and believed to be true
Wilford starts explaining absurdism to Abe as he starts questioning reality, the detective blowing up at him again for practically ruining his life but Wilford starts asking Abe about their history - about how long he's been chasing him, how Wilford got away in the past, what their closest encounters were, and as Abe can't seem pin point any specific time besides the time of the WKM party, Wilford dawns on him that "no one can survive a bullet to the heart" and it all seems to click
And in the most infuriating scene of my life, Wilford offers Abe a release, a way to enjoy his life, as figures appear behind him, all adorned in a white mask with a pink mustache on it
I
It
That
WHOOOO
I must've watched that scene a HUNDRED TIMES BY NOW - and Mark keeps teasing it !! In Space did a small thing with it and even in the stream Mark did of explaining WMLW HE SAID NOTHING ABOUT THIS ??? WHY IS HE KEEPING THIS SO TIGHT TO HIS CHEST I'M GONNA EXPLODE
Fuck the FNaF timeline THIS IS MORE CONFUSING IT MAKES ME SO
AUUGHH
[REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED]
Anyway, the video ends with Abe shrugging, giving in and dancing to the end credits music as the color is saturated once again, the cast partying and dancing together with the credits rolling
God fucking damn do I love Markiplier
I wanna try and sum up my different autistic obsessions with the different characters cause I love Darkiplier and Wilford in very different ways
Dark I love in the way of "I want to intimatey know your character so badly that if someone were to ask me how does Dark feel about bowling? I could give a three hour powerpoint presentation on why I think he would enjoy it"
Wilford I love in the way of "FUCKING SCRIMBLO !!!!!1!!!1!!111! THE AUTISM !!1!!1!1!!11!111!1! OH MY GOD !!1111!!!1 FUCK I'M GONNA RIP YOU INTO A MILLION PIECES I LOVE YOU SO MUCH RAAAAAAAAAAH"
Personal headcanons birthed from this series:
Because Celine dabbles in the occult and The groundskeeper had swore never to go into the manor save for one reason and that reason being suggestively demonic or otherwise supernatural on top of the fact that Damien was questioned to secretly be a demon, I believe Dark, having Damien and Celine's soul within one body, might be some demonic force, whether it be a demonic ritual that created Dark or Dark being a different demon entirely, my personal headcanon/theory (kinda ?) is that Dark is a demon or demonic source
More specifically, I mentioned a while back that Tom is a demon of Wrath, well I believe Dark to not only be a demon of Pride, but the demon of pride
But this is more than a headcanon than a theory so I don't think anyone'll bite into this more than me lol
EDIT: The video where Santa has the blurred face did come from a charity livestream ! it came way after MTV though, roughly like two years after during the "Stand Up To Cancer" Livestream as one of many milestone reward skits
EDIT 2: Remember how I said I was gonna talk about Porniplier later? Cut due to time, I cannot go any further than three days to write this my autism may be insane but even it has it's limits
#this took me three days to write#this is after I just went on a rant to my partner about the parallel between S9 EP14 of Adventure Time to the Cask of Amontillado#typing that out like that makes me realize how insane that sounds but I promise you. watch S9EP14 after watchin the Cask of Amontillado pla#i don't know if you could tell but I'm literally bat shit insane#jay answers#jay talk#Markiplier#Markiplier Cinematic Universe#I wanted to put MCU but then I relaized that's a very different audience#one I don't really wanna interact with lol#Darkiplier#Wilford Warstache#Adventures With Markiplier#there's too many things to tag this with oml#jay rants#this is no talking this is only ranting#A Date with Markiplier#Markiplier TV#A Heist With Markiplier#In Space with Markiplier#Markiplier Egos
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Hello Rainbowsky!!
Happy New Year!!!
Let’s do a fun CPN Q/A. We would like to know your ans.
Out of all the CPN from 2018 to 2022:
Which CPN is your most fav?
CPN that you love but it is less likely to be true.
CPN that you think can’t be washed.
CPN that made you cry happy tears or made you emotional.
CPN that made you again believe in BJYX [If you had lost your belief in them at some point]
Most underrated CPN according to you.
Most overrated CPN according to you.
CPN that made you laugh at haters who tell turtles are delusional.
Hi Anon, happy new year!! 🥳
This is difficult because it's limited by my often terrible memory, but I'll give it a try.
Fake, fan fiction, CPN.
Which CPN is your most fav?
Probably GG showing up in the background of SDOC3. It's just so insane and bizarre and improbable, but it also seems likely to be true.
CPN that you love but it is less likely to be true.
I love the idea of brands being in on GG and DD and throwing candy for fans, I just don't believe it's likely.
CPN that you think can’t be washed.
DD's name appearing in the Qingdao snacks video, for sure. That one is 100% unwashable to me, because I can hear it clearly with my own ears.
CPN that made you cry happy tears or made you emotional.
DD driving 13 hours to a lockdown-risk zone to see GG.
GG reacting strongly when DD crashed his motorcycle and later sending DD a voice message saying, "You always shine brightly!"
GG having to console DD when 227 happened. 😅
DD hiding GG in his rehearsal time slot.
GG writing a message for BXG. The idea that he's the one writing those closing lines in all of the LRLG messages.
GG writing DD's birthday message.
Basically anything domestic between them makes me verklempt.
There are probably dozens...
CPN that made you again believe in BJYX [If you had lost your belief in them at some point]
This one doesn't really apply. I've never lost belief in them since I've been truly SZD.
Most underrated CPN according to you.
Their studios working together, sharing employees, etc. It's very likely true, but people don't seem to see how big a deal that is. It essentially shows them to be married. Two stars sharing resources like that would not be done lightly. If there was any thought that the couple could potentially break up at some point in the future, they simply wouldn't make such a move. It would be too difficult and messy to clear up after a breakup. Their management companies would also have to be aware of and sign off on such a move.
Put it this way: one of the biggest gestures of serious commitment two stars could make is sharing teams.
Most overrated CPN according to you.
The finger, without a doubt. I think it's DD's finger, and that the RoMW cover is all selfie outtakes from DD's phone. However, even if it WAS GG's finger, it would still be a totally underwhelming candy. I can't find any level on which to get excited about it.
CPN that made you laugh at haters who tell turtles are delusional.
All the many situations where solos claim some item or CPN links GG or DD to another person, only to find that the evidence links GG and DD to each other more strongly. For example, the bone necklace.
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sonic superstars thoughts
well twitter might've made the final bozo move that'll effectively kill it so i guess instead of even bothering to update my video games thread i'll just start posting thoughts here, if i've got interesting things to say. ended up having more to say than i thought so this one'll be under a read more
sonic superstars is a weird game where i think it kind of doomed itself in the public's eyes by both being a followup to sonic mania and being a $60 video game. i don't really take into account prices of video games when giving my thoughts on this kind of thing usually, because if you're patient enough you can usually snag them for a good price or you know, sail the seven seas. but i do think it's hard to ignore the jump from a 20 buck game to a 60 buck game. sonic superstars most certainly has more budget behind it, but other than that i'd say right off the bat that this is VERY strongly a "Wait for a sale" type game unless you're an insane sonic head like me.
so like. the thing with this game vs sonic mania. this game is not better than mania. if you're expecting that you're gonna be disappointed. i do still think it's a good classic game! but mania is a tough standard to beat, especially from a team like arzest that admittedly hasn't had the best track record in the world. they don't seem like an untalented studio, but it does seem like they're rarely given the budget or time to squeeze out their full potential. sonic superstars is easily their best effort by far, and it's not even close. the fact that they made a good platformer and not a mediocre one is a damn miracle.
the control and physics are pretty much straight up ripped from mania, which was the right thing to do. there was concerns that this was gonna be a Sonic 4 situation where it feels miserable to control, but nah, you move like you'd expect to in a classic sonic game. this is a HUGE boon to the game because it feels so much better and more authentic than a lot of other 2d sonic games. it's one of the couple of reasons i'd put this over the dimps games, even! not that i have no love in my heart for advance or rush, but mania controlled like a dream and this does too.
the level design is alright, though it definitely feels more safe? there's some fun gimmicks here and there but they don't feel like anything especially crazy. thank fucking god this doesn't have the dimps problem of bottomless pits all over the place, so even if you're playing a bit risky with the drop dash you're more likely to bash your head into spikes than an instakill obstacle.
i will say that the level THEMES are a step above mania, 100%. i love mania but it really is held back by having familiar level themes, reminding you that Green Hill and Chemical Plant exist, and you will never truly be free of them. i think superstars is the first sonic game in years to not reuse level themes (aside from the battle mode, apparently) which, god. even frontiers couldn't resist putting in familiar zone. it's honestly a really cool aspect of this game! i got to play a sonic game where i'd go into a level and it'd be something new! obviously they still follow archetypes like "Grass" "Snow" "Water" etc etc but it's nice to see some sort of attempt at original theming. it's something i respect the team a lot for, given sonic's constant need to draw from the past.
a sour point of the levels is easily the bosses. i think your mileage will vary on these. i didn't think they were That Bad, but other people find them to be complete slogs. you do a good amount of waiting around for the weak point to be exposed, and by the end of the game, some bosses are taking up nearly as much time as the levels themselves, with the final boss being WAY longer. at least i could entertain myself by drop dashing around the arena, but i'd imagine i'd have more fun getting in a constant stream of hits.
the music in this game is also... fine? there's some good tracks in there but there's also a bunch of tracks that are a bit slop. it's mostly the genesis sounding tracks. whenever this game wants to sound like a genesis game it sounds bad. the boss theme being probably the worst song in the game which, given that most people already dont like the bosses, is damning.
i do like the art direction of this game a lot, i think sonic and company look great! i definitely enjoy this look for classic sonic over how he looks in generations/forces. there's a lot of really cute animations for each character as well. there are some pretty cheap looking animations, which i noticed on the game's big flickies the most. i remember hearing a lot of people say the backgrounds felt empty, but i guess i didn't notice it that much? probably easier to get that vibe when you're not zooming across the level.
ive enjoyed my time with this game and im sure i'll continue to enjoy it as i continue to replay it. it's not classic sonic's best, but it's a game that does a lot right, and shows a great improvement for a studio who's track record is typically considered subpar. i will say, after mania, it's hard Not to think superstar's 60 dollar price tag is steep. but i'm sure you'll find your favorite method to not pay that much for this game. well, good luck out there
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The profound laziness of Dave Rubin
No, but you posting a video about it for clicks is. (source: Rubin Report on YouTube)
Dave Rubin is a pretty regular source of truly insane and stupid takes and today is no exception. This was the episode he put out on January 31st and as usual it breaks new ground in the realm of stupidity. Lets get into it.
Dave starts off by declaring the theme of todays episode, or lack thereof.
01:24, Dave Rubin: "The theme of todays show is there's an awful lot happening in the world right now. This WW3 situation seems like it's ramping up a bit. I'm gonna try to cool the jets as everyone loves talking about 'Oh my god WW3 is happening and oh my god the civil war is happening and oh my god the alien invasion is happening.' Sometimes, maybe we can have some calmer heads prevail so we'll do a little bit of that. But what I wanted to start with that'll kind of prime everything is that Jon Stewart-"
Brief pause, so what's the theme? If the theme is WW3 related stuff, how on earth is Jon Stewart even remotely related to that?
01:51, Dave Rubin: "Jon Stewart, I guess former comedian. I don't know what we call him at this point, he's basically a progressive activist now."
"Yeah, imagine being a former comedian who became a political activist. Man, I can't even imagine. That's so sick."
First of all, the sheer lack of self awareness is stunning. Second of all, watch that video in full if you want to get an idea of the sheer lack of talent that Dave brings to the table. It's three minutes of Dave being a complete moron constantly trying to do crowd work and getting absolutely no laughs out of anyone.
02:18, Dave Rubin: "Jon Stewart left the Daily Show, what was it? About six years or so ago. Ends up bringing a new show, The Problem With Jon Stewart onto Apple TV and he just goes all in on the crazy leftism."
Jon Stewart is back at the Daily Show for a limited time and Dave Rubin isn't gonna take it! He's only hosting on Monday nights to cover things related to the election cycle.
Jon Stewart was always a pretty big leftist. Here's him absolutely demolishing fellow blog favorite Tucker Carlson all the way back in 2004. I can't help but feel a tinge of jealousy in Dave's coverage of Jon. Jon also stood up for his free speech, something that Dave should love, by walking away from his show on Apple TV when they told him he couldn't talk about AI and China.
Dave doesn't even understand the most basic facts about this story...like the fact that Jon isn't the only person hosting the Daily Show or the fact that they are making more than the Monday episode.
02:30, Dave Rubin: "But the machine is bringing him back now, putting him back at the Daily Show at the chair on a weekly show not a daily show. So the Daily Show's going to weekly, alright they're going to struggle with that."
Here's what happened, Dave read some headline somewhere about Jon Stewart returning to the Daily Show and instead of trying to learn the facts about the story that he's trying to cover, he just barged in and started talking about it on his show.
If Dave actually read about what he's trying to talk about the subject he's talking about, he'd know that Jon is only hosting on Monday’s and that other people are hosting the show on all the other days of the week. It's also only for the election cycle.
Dave plays some clips of CBS for him to react to.
03:36, Dave Rubin: "We're doing PR, we're owned by the same people and we have to tell you he's really great. Yeah, ok! So you guys get how the whole machine works, right? There's no reason for CBS News to be covering that on their nightly news program."
At the end of the clip he plays, the reporter discloses that CBS and Comedy Central are both owned by Paramount, in short disclosing the conflict of interest. Should they have maybe not covered this? Yeah, I wouldn't have because it's a conflict of interest. But they did disclose it.
03:51, Dave Rubin: "And the damn shame about Jon Stewart and we'll illustrate this in just a moment is that at least for the first couple of years at the Daily Show he was doing something kind of new and poking and prodding at the media the way I kinda do on this show."
Dave Rubin and Jon Stewart have one key difference; Jon is funny and insightful and Dave is well....Dave.
04:07, Dave Rubin: "He's sort of gone off the deep end, or I don't even need to qualify that, he has completely gone off the deep end when it comes to progressive politics and I would say become everything that he probably once despised."
Just to recap some of Dave's career; Dave started off at the Young Turks, a progressive news outlet, and ended up starting a conservative news show after leaving the Young Turks. His sudden pivot to conservativism coincidentally dovetailed with receiving money from the Koch Brothers.
So who has became everything they once despised here?
Dave plays a clip of Jon confronting a Republican attorney general about gender affirming care for minors. If I were Dave I really wouldn't have played that clip as Jon does a really good job dismantling the Attorney Generals arguments. Dave does cut the clip and this was his takeaway.
06:51, Dave Rubin: "And it goes on and on, what an absolutely smug unlikeable person he became for the cool one million plus per episode he was making on that now defunct show."
More of Dave describing himself. Seriously, take some time to watch a Dave Rubin episode if you have time. He talks in this really slow and condescending way that's near unbearable to listen to.
07:10, Dave Rubin: "Jon Stewart, if you are watching this you might want to read Irreversible Damage by Abigail Shrier, thank you, who wrote an incredible book about how so much of what's happening to our children is a social contagion. Particularly when it comes to young girls thinking they can transition and become young boys."
Abigail Shrier is one of those right-wing grifters who has made a cottage industry of spreading misinformation about transgender youth. Blog favorite and professional sociopath Matt Walsh is another example of that. Shriers book is filled with massive amounts of misinformation and outright falsehoods.
Also, the idea of Jon Stewart even knowing of Dave Rubin's existence is laughable. You just know if Jon stepped foot on Dave's set, Dave would be tripping over himself to get Jon a beer and a pillow for his feet.
08:04, Dave Rubin: "No you cannot take a boy and actually make them a girl, that's just not reality."
Say it with me; absolutely nobody is giving transgender surgeries to small children. Dave's entire framework is simply denying the existence of transgender people.
I've said this before but I find the fact that Dave is a member of the LGBTQ community and still has hopped onto the right-wing transphobia bandwagon really infuriating. Years ago his ilk would be trying to make his marriage illegal and guess what? They still want that! It's so frustrating to watch this guy run defense for guys who hate who he is.
And talk about "smug and unlikeable". Dave hasn't even bothered to meet up with the families of trans youth like Jon has and is handwaving legitimate medical treatments because "my billionaire sponsors don't like it".
Anyway, lets move on before my head explodes. Dave plays another Jon Stewart clip, this time him interviewing Gavin Newsom. Dave then plays some clips from the Daily Show when Trevor Noah was hosting it. Dave proceeds to call a transwoman a "creature" and I want to throw my laptop out the window. I'll elaborate on this in the conclusion, but I'm starting to realize that Dave Rubin is a profoundly lazy content creator.
14:22, Dave Rubin: "Now the reason I'm showing you all this and starting the show with this Jon Stewart thing and everything else is because the Daily Show became this cultural touchpoint. 'More young people get their news from the Daily Show than anywhere else.' So when you wonder how did this all happen? That so many kids are confused about their gender. How did it happen that being not racist made you racist? It's because this is the crap that Hollywood pushes on us."
"The Daily Show is turning people trans" is an argument that I never thought I would hear and yet here we are. The median viewership age of the Daily Show in 2024 is 63 years old by the way so this argument makes even less sense in this day and age.
Dave plays another Daily Show clip. This time it's one of the guest hosts talking about migrants.
15:54, Dave Rubin: "Illegal people are here illegally. Even if there are jobs for them then what you do is you have them come legally and you figure it out."
Except that the pathways to legal immigration are borderline impossible to fulfill. If Dave is saying that we should loosen those pathways, I agree. But that's not what he's saying so this is just him being an obtuse idiot.
Dave does an ad for Tax Network USA and then he expands on his broader point.
18:10, Dave Rubin: "What I'm trying to lay out to you, and that's all well and good, is that all the ideas that we just talked about there are the things that get into the culture and you wonder why everything is wrong, why our politicians suck, why we don't know up is down and up is up and down is down and all these things."
Dave Rubin: Master Orator strikes again.
"Up is down and up is up and down is down", truly profound stuff right there. Seriously, who the hell watches this unironically?! How does this guy have 2.14M subscribers?! At least guys like Ben Shapiro have certain airs around them that make them seem like intellectuals to people who don't know any better.
18:25, Dave Rubin: "But now I want to drive this a little further into the cultural piece of this because Law & Order where a white woman is raped by a black man but doesn't want him to go to jail. Take a look at this."
Dave then plays the clip from Law & Order. Again, this a ridiculously stupid thing to talk about, especially since Dick Wolf seems like a pretty conservative guy from what I can tell.
19:40, Dave Rubin: "Could we do a road trip after the show? Would you guys be interested in doing a road trip after the show? Drive cross-country, go to Hollywood, bomb the place?"
Law & Order has been filmed in New York for a million years.
Also, the episode ends with the rape victim testifying against the rapist so this whole story is a complete load of nothing even if we follow the parameters that Dave laid out.
20:11, Dave Rubin: "The messaging that they are sending to the brains of young people and I guess middle age people who watch Law & Order, everything is freaking backwards. They have taken art and made it activism."
Does....does Dave not realize that art and film has been a form of activism since its inception. Also, I love how he realized in the middle of his sentence that young people tend not to watch Law & Order and threw that "middle aged people" in there at the last second. Nice save.
Dave talks about the Disney Snow White remake. This is such an insanely old story. Ben Shapiro even announced a "competitor" version that will be hosted on the Daily Wire what feels like a century ago. Old news and an immediate skip.
21:21, Dave Rubin: "I do wanna back up for just a second. I don't condone or call for terrorism in Hollywood or anywhere else. I didn't mean bomb the place, I meant like glitterbomb it, you know what I mean? Just go there and pour glitter all over these people, that is what I meant. Lets be clear about that because Media Matters I'm sure is watching every moment of this 'Rubin just called to bomb Hollywood.'"
I've got bad news for Dave, he's not even important enough to get clipped by Media Matters. He's been mentioned by them in passing but the last time he got clipped was February of 2023. Really the only people criticizing him are a Twitter account called "Dave Rubin Clips" on Twitter, his own subreddit, and me.
Dave plays a clip from SNL. He does an ad for the Wellness Company, it's the same company that makes those emergency kits that Charlie Kirk was hawking in our last episode.
Now, its time to get serious. Dave wants to talk about the news...it involves playing more stupid freaking clips. He plays an MSNBC clip and here are his thoughts.
26:11, Dave Rubin: "Ok, I'm only showing you that because these people that they put on there, they just offer them the red meat. And of course their kind of brain damaged progressive audience eats it up."
"And then I play a clip of it so that my audience can eat up my commentary on it"
Also, the brain damaged comment was stupid as all hell. Anyway, Trump lost the defamation suit against E. Jean Carroll and Dave comments on it the only way he can...by commenting on a clip he plays from The View.
28:13, Dave Rubin: "It really, it's so horrible. And watching the women applaud. If they all felt like this woman really got raped, again rape is pretty bad, they wouldn't be celebrating today, right? Like, it wouldn't be a day of celebration. It would be kind of a somber like, 'Oh there was a verdict in the defamation thing related to the rape and Donald Trumps gonna have to pay up.' But they know it's all bullshit, it's all a show."
"Woah, a rape victim celebrating finally getting justice?! That makes no sense!"
This argument makes absolutely zero sense. Imagine if you got raped and the court forces your rapist to pay you millions of dollars. You'd be pretty damn happy. Does Dave think that after you get raped you are incapable of feeling anything outside of sadness?! And what's more, if you manage to score a win against your rapist you are still going to be sad.
Lets play a game. Do you think that Dave is going to;
A): Offer insightful and nuanced commentary on the verdict that considers the evidence and leads to an informed conclusion.
B): Play another stupid clip and then say something stupid.
The answer is A....just kidding! This is Dave Rubin we're talking about, of course it's going to be B! Dave rolls a CNN clip and mumbles about some stupid shit.
30:20, Dave Rubin: "If she got raped, which Donald Trump was not convicted of, would you want to make a show of all of this?"
The guy was extremely wealthy and that was before he became president. She's celebrating getting a form of justice against an extremely powerful adversary.
Also, Trump was found liable of sexually abusing Carroll which is commonly understood as rape. So he didn't even get that part right. Again, laziness.
Dave comments on a joke Carroll made to Rachel Maddow that she would "buy her a penthouse". It was a joke and apparently Dave is pissed about it. Whatever. Dave plays more clips of Carroll and then plays a Megyn Kelly clip. Again, letting others make his arguments for him.
35:16, Dave Rubin: "This is why Megyn is just so consistently great. I don't know what happened, you don't know what happened, Megyn Kelly doesn't know what happened."
So the bar for trusting a rape victim is if you know for sure what happened? That's ridiculous! Plus the evidence was clearly compelling enough that Trump was found liable for sexual abuse.
Also, wasn't the theme for today supposed to be about WW3? "Cooler heads shall prevail" and all that?
37:03, Dave Rubin: "But now I wanna connect that to something that's happening in the world and show you Trump at his absolute best. Because these are the moments that we could use a real leader in this country and I think he has an interesting opportunity. And as I've been telling you for the last two weeks, I wanna nudge him to be the best Donald Trump if possible."
Oh yeah, that's gonna happen. I can just see Trump now;
"I was gonna make this decision but Dave Rubin said that would be a bad idea! Guess I'm not gonna do that!"
Anyway, Dave's next story is about the drone-strike in Jordan that took the lives of 3 US soldiers. He reads some stuff from the Daily Wires website (and here I thought he was going to play a clip of Ben Shapiro, he's evolving!) and then launches into his take;
38:44, Dave Rubin: "So now you might be wondering 'Dave, what does this have to do with the E. Jean Carroll thing?' Well, Donald Trump issued a statement on this and I think he nailed it."
Dave reads out a Donald Trump post that he very clearly didn't write (not enough random all caps). Again, Dave can't really make content of his own capably and just relies on everybody else to do the heavy lifting. Also, I love how quickly he switched over from being a Ronnie D simp to being a MAGA moron. Those boots need a lickin'!
40:20, Dave Rubin: "Look, I don't know if Donald Trump wrote that himself. It's obviously irrelevant, they have speechwriters and everything else."
It's relevant when you spent the past four minutes hyping this post up as "the Trump we need" and "Trump at his absolute best". If Trump didn't write it then it isn't Trump. Unless you are saying that Trump is at his best when he isn't in control, in which case me and Dave might have more common ground than I thought.
40:26, Dave Rubin: "But the clarity, the moral clarity, 'peace through strength'. The reality of the fact that three, four years ago, when Donald Trump was still president, especially pre-COVID, that the world was peaceful and Middle East peace deals were being signed left and right. The Iranians were doing absolutely nothing."
It may have seemed more peaceful compared to right now but it's important to remember that the conflict between Israel and Palestine has been going on for way longer than October 7th. The Abraham Accords, which I assume is what Dave is talking about when he mentions about peace deals, was brokered between countries that weren't engaged in conflict and did nothing to impact Israel and Palestine. Also, nothing happened with Iran? Remember the assassination of General Suleimani that nearly pushed the US and Iran to the brink of war? That certainly didn't help peace in Iran.
41:30, Dave Rubin: "The first thing that Donald Trump did when he got into office was drop the mother of all bombs, the MOAB, the mother of all bombs, dropped it. People didn't even know why he dropped it but it made it seem like he was kinda crazy so don't mess with this guy."
So Dave's brilliant foreign policy strategy is acting like a complete lunatic?
41:43, Dave Rubin: "He killed Suleimani, right? And everyone was like 'this is gonna start World War Three', actually it caused Iran to not do much of anything while he was president."
The reason we are seeing so much action from Iran is because of Israel/Palestine, a conflict which finally boiled over after decades. Blaming Irans increased action on Biden is stupid.
Again, I don't think Biden is faultless. His continued funding of the genocide in Palestine is awful and I fundamentally disagree with it. But criticizing him for stupid made up reasons is well...stupid.
Conclusion:
Ok, so Dave playing a lot of clips and not adding a lot of original ideas to his commentary took me off guard the last time that I talked about him but this time I was ready for it. This episode didn't break a lot of new ground but I felt that it would be a good opportunity to talk about something about Dave that needs to be said and it's that his content is so deeply lazy.
Think about it. Your average Dave Rubin episode is just him playing television clips completely out of context and then saying a two second conservative culture war related soundbite after it. Dave Rubin basically gets mad at TV for a living.
Even when he's trying to make an argument, he just mumbles something that doesn't really make any sense and then lets someone more articulate like Megyn Kelly pick up the pieces. It's to the point where I would be willing to wager that a good 50% of his show is just clips of other people talking.
This is because Dave Rubin is a grifter who doesn't really bring any new ideas to the table outside of "I'm gay and I'm also conservative". I feel like a big part of him realizes that when he talks for long periods of time he usually ends up making a fool of himself.
And it's not just the clips either, he barely researches what he's talking about. Take for example, the Daily Show coverage. With a five second Google search I knew more about the story than Dave did and as a result was able to point out his inaccuracies and make him look like a complete idiot. Same thing with him not realizing that Trump was found liable for sexual abuse. This is basic shit that you need to know when you are trying to act like the authority on a subject. But Dave doesn't even look into it because he's too busy clipping NBC and being deeply lazy.
Anyway, cheers and I'll see you in the next one.
#right wing bullshit#politics#conservative bullshit#fact checking#journalism#bad takes#conservatives#disinformation#debunking#dave rubin#right wing disinformation#right wing stupidity#fuck transphobes
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Hi-Fi Rush.
Revealed during some showcase Xbox was having that day, this surprised literally everyone when we learned that it was available right at that moment. No marketing. Any nay-sayers were immidately shut up because the game was right there to play. It was a real ballsy move.
Due to how Forspoken soured any attempt at comedic writing in video games around the time, i immediately turned off the trailer for this game the moment i heard "Yup, that's me." My attitude would quickly change after pressing the play button by accident again.
I had an extra code for 2 months of Xbox game pass (christ this is a good service) & downloaded it when it was available. Immidately starting the game, i'm introduced with a well animated intro cutscene that seamlessly transitions to the beautiful cel shaded visuals.
At this point, i realized that everything in the world is synced to the beat. the player character's footsteps, his jump (if you can time it right) and almost everything working in the background. After stepping out, i truly recognized how much style this game got.
For one, the character design & art. Look at this!
Everyone's has a look that i would see at 6:00 PM on Teletoon. Everything that happens makes me think of something that would be written by man of action. Makes me think of Slugterra. Storm Hawks. This type of Disney XD Awesomeness character design is distinct and it blew my mind to see it return in such a fashion. I don't see it that often and i hope this inspires more to look into it. I know it did so for me.
The presentation is some of the most consistent and high quality i've seen in a video game. I felt the same wonder i felt seeing the Lego Movie for the first time while running through this. The animation, both 2D and 3D is outstanding. Hi-Fi Rush likes to flip between the two on a dime, without warning. The cartoony artstyle and how they utilize it is exceptional. Radical color changes, motion lines, visible effects straight out of a comic book, expressions that snap on a dime, allowing for gags to be easily pulled off with little use for realism logic. The cutscenes like to jump to an fps of 24 to keep it up. The sound effects and things that happen within them are all to the beat. There is an insane amount of detail and polish here. This is a playable cartoon, through and through. There's very little to break the illusion they're selling you. There's even animation of both Chai and 808 messing around as you transition to the other part of battle. They don't have to do that, but they did. There's so much love in this project. I see the vision and you will as well. I played the entirety of this just in awe of what i was looking at. This is what happens when you let creatives just. go wild.
As RANK10YGO put it, everything about this game feels like a can of Fanta on a hot summer day.
The combat is masterful. I hear that people that were involved in some of the greatest character action games were on this project. You've got parrying, movement, and allies that you can swap in to extend combos and disarm specific enemies. The combat isn't really deep, but good lord is it fun. Also, take all of that and put it to the beat of the music.
Exciting camera work, explosive effects, an energetic UI, voice acting that gives everyone life, everything on the screen is moving. All to the beat of Shuichi Kobori's glorious compositions. This is the exact stuff my mind dreams up of when i space off.
The boss fights are absolutely jaw dropping by the way. You think it's gonna go the way you think it is, but it doesn't. It's something different every time, some of them aren't even fights!
Even after finishing off the great story, i unlocked some extra features and a postgame that encouraged me to play again on harder difficulties. Character customization, a model viewer with a wealth of character information & a music player was immediately available to me. Most AAA games like to lock that content behind DLC or pre order bonuses. I thought i was missing out on not getting the deluxe edition. but i felt like i wasn't. The game isnt really that long as well.
It's clear that this game was designed with fun in mind. Profits probably came second, but Tango Gameworks clearly wanted to create something fun and memorable. This is a title that i would've seen in 2010. Not 2023. I had not one bad experience going through this title. It felt like there was absolutely no corporate meddling, nothing holding the team back as they developed it. This shit is what dreams are made of. It's been years since i've been taken in and enamored by a video game like this. I had so much fun. I love Hi-Fi Rush with all of my heart. I'll never forget this.
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Wanna share some Arabella/Seven headcannons??
PLS UR GOOD ! i am just so brainrotted abt them so this is a doozy 😭 i apologize in advance bc this is off the rails LMFAO but thank u for sending <3
under the cut bc like i said . deranged insane etc.
- okay so the first one which i feel like is my main hc abt them is that seven and arabella would drive around in arabella's car ALL THE TIME just bc they had nothing to do? and they would listen to music and discuss it and if there were certain aspects they liked they would try to incorporate it into dead apple! they also brainstormed many dead apple songs in her car too. when they weren't doing that they were just enjoying each other's company :) have u ever had a friendship where it didn't matter what yall were doing as long as u were together it was fun? yeah it was like that LMFAO also any cd's seven had put in arabella's car were swiftly thrown away after the break up.
- ^ to add to this one i have this very bad and insane thought that when they break up arabella goes off the rails for months and ends up getting a dui and gets her license revoked and it's like. you lost seven and you lost the thing that you loved doing with him. so she writes this song and performs it in the first concert dead apple has after she gets her shit together and can perform without full on sobbing LMFAO and she only performs this song this one time and it never gets a studio release because that was at the worst point of her life and she doesn't like dwelling on it and she kind of just wants to put it behind her. but i imagine footage of that song gets spread around again with botb and she has to get orion to get the videos taken down LMFAO
- their first kiss: i have been thinking abt this one A LOT and i do like amy's scene A LOT but i wanted one that fit for arabella if that makes sense. anyway it's her 21st birthday and seven's gift is when the pawn by fiona apple on vinyl. i have said it multiple times on this blog but arabella adores fiona apple and had been trying to get this vinyl for YEARS because she didn't want some like . amazon one if that makes sense LMFAO she wanted the real deal and seven managed to find one and when she opened it she was like oh my god. like that feeling of when someone truly gets you and understands that u don't need anything big or fancy as a gift it's the thought that counts as corny as that sounds LMFAO. anyways she had been feeling some sort of way about seven for a WHILEEE up to this point but was too scared to do anything about it but this moment gives her the kick in the ass to finally do something so she kisses him !
"um. i guess that means you like the gift?"
and she's like oh my god what have i done . but the kiss was reciprocated so they kiss some more LMFAO and become official shortly after that <3 arabella still has that vinyl but she never plays it.
- prom: so arabella and seven obviously went together but as friends. just as friends. of course. LMFAO but arabella wears a green dress and seven wears a tie to match :) in my instagram edit if u look close enough you'll see that the cover art for the song is a green dress and im thinking that arabella squeezed into it and did the pictures for the song in it bc THAT is so painful and i love making her suffer if nothing else.
here is the cover art for green also :) we can pretend that that's arabella and not olivia rodrigo LMFAO
#ask#anon#inf: seven x arabella#thank u again for sending this i am obsessed with them#these are honestly my most brainrotted thoughts abt them but im sure there will be more once we get more chapters#and i flesh out their relationship more <3
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