#the thing in the snuffy one was actually said to me by one of my uncles recently

[maochira]

i cant stop thinking about lavinho and chris reacting to the reader coming out as a lesbian

Writing this for Noa and Snuffy as well because I can't just do half of the dads😔 also funfact I never had a coming out I just had girlfriends and that's how my parents found out FHKHDSAKJSHDAS

Requests open! - masterlist

Tags: lesbian!reader, actually writing the coaches as dads and not as father figures

"Dad, can we talk?" Noa immediately stops whatever he's doing and turns around to look at you. "What's wrong?" He asks when he sees how nervous you are. "There's uh... Something I need to tell you." - "Did something happen?" You can hear the worry in your father's voice. "No it's not that, it's just...-" Noa puts a hand on your shoulder and gives you a reassuring smile. "Take your time." You nod and take a deep breath before saying "Dad, I'm a lesbian." Noa lets out a sigh of relief. There were so many thoughts running through his head, so he's relieved it's something simple like this. "Were you afraid I wouldn't accept you?" He asks and pulls you into a hug. "You know I'll always love you, right?"

You and Chris rarely talk about anything serious and keeps things lighthearted, so when you ask him to sit down in the living room so you can tell him something, his thoughts go in a completely different direction. "Did you get in trouble? What did you mess up?" He asks teasingly immediately after you sit down next to him. "What? No, I-" - "You want more money?" - "Dad can you be serious for a moment?" You ask a little frustrated. This makes Chris notice how serious whatever you want to talk about must be, so he only nods and waits for you to go on. "I think... I think I like girls. Only girls." You finally tell him. Even though he wanted to stay serious, Chris can't help but laugh a bit. "You like girls? Me too!!" He puts an arm around your shoulder and pulls you closer to himself. "I guess that makes you my little lesbean?"

Coming out to Lavinho wouldn't actually be necessary. You could just introduce a girlfriend to him and he'd act the same as if you introduced a boyfriend to him. You planned to do it like this, but that requires getting a girlfriend first, and the pressure to tell your dad just gets stronger. One day, you and Lavinho are just talking in the car and the topic switches to relationships, so he starts "One day when you'll have a boyfriend-" and you interrupt him to correct it to "Girlfriend." Lavinho immediately repeats his sentence "One day, when you'll have a girlfriend-" but then he realizes you just came out to him and looks at you for a moment, "Wait, you're gay?" - "Yeah." - "Hi gay I'm dad."

Snuffy always knew there was something different about you, but he couldn't figure out what. He often noticed your lack of interest in boys and that you kept saying "Boys are stupid" whenever someone asked when you'll have your first boyfriend. He didn't want to make any big assumptions only based on this. Instead, he wanted to wait until you would approach him about it. During a family reunion, one of your uncles said "You're such a pretty girl, it's only a matter of time until the boys get interested in you." And it kept being stuck in your head, so once you and your father got home, you decided it was time to tell him. "Dad? Remember what one of my uncles said about boys?" - "What about it?" Snuffy immediately pays his full attention to you. "I still think boys are stupid." Your comment makes Snuffy laugh and he asks: "And what about girls?" The question makes you laugh a bit before you respond. "I think this is a good moment to tell you I'm a lesbian." Even though he fully expected this now, Snuffy still gets a bit emotional. "Then I think it's a good moment to tell you this won't change anything about the way I love you."

[milaisreading]

hello! can I request something about manager meeting with sae/national team and others members of NEO egoists league (like Kaiser, Noa, Oliver, Sendo, Chris Prince, Snuffy etc)? maybe some moments about coaches teasing boys about their little (actually not little) crush on manager? or some protective/jealouse moments? or some moments where new members warm up for manager too and slowly become her simps too? everything you want and can imagine!

Author: Hi!! I hope u like this one and that it somehow fit what you meant. I did 2/3 requests, I am keeping the last one for a scenario I will write later on. It's too long to fit here😵‍💫 hope u like this and thank u for the request🩷🩷

Warnings ⚠️: none in particular. Reader uses she/her and there might be manga spoilers. Requests are open

⚽️Blue lock belongs to:Muneyuki Kaneshiro and Yusuke Nomura⚽️

"Rin...could you like move it?" (Y/n) wondered as she tried to move past the boy, but he would just follow her steps and block her from moving any further.

"Give me those boxes! I will bring it to the team. I heard the national team is pretty aggressive." Rin said, trying to grab the box from (Y/n), but she moved away.

"Ego-san told me to bring it to the coach of the team. Rin, you are being rediculous and should go back to training. You will get punished." (Y/n) argued as she moved away, the boy kept on nervously looking around, as if he was praying that someone wouldn't come. Growing worried, the girl's glare softened and she looked at Rin more calmly now.

"What's wrong? You seem to be on edge ever since the national team arrived. Did your brother say something?"

"You know Sae?" Rin asked, alarmed by (Y/n) mentioning him.

'Did they meet? Did he somehow get a hold of her social media?!'

"Well from the news and you told me once you don't have the best of relationship with him." (Y/n) explained simply.

"So you don't know him more than that? Like on a personal level?" Rin asked cautiously, confusing (Y/n) even more.

"No? You do realize your brother has been in Spain the whole time and I am in Japan. Are you sure you don't need to visit a doctor, Rin?" The boy let out a sigh as (Y/n) used the opportunity and walked past him towards the quarters the U-20 team was settled in.

"Wait!" Rin ran after her as (Y/n) sighed, annoyed with his behavior.

'It isn't even noon yet...'

"So these are the papers I will sign? Did Teieri-san or Ego-san say till when?" The coach of the national team asked (Y/n), who nodded her head.

"They will need the papers back by tonight. Please keep the copies just in case, also I was instructed to explain how the computer system works here..."

Rin tuned out their talking and kept look around the hall nervously, hoping that she will be done soon.

'Please hurry up... if (Y/n) even throws one look at Sae, I know I am done for. All the girls like him, so why would it be different this time.' Rin sighed as he watched the girl write down the instructions.

'She always looks cute while explaining things to someone... My manager-'

"Yo, Sae! Isn't that your little brother?" A voice came from behind the now frozen boy.

'Crap!'

"Rin? What are you doing here?" Sae asked calmly as he and Sendo approached the younger Itoshi. Rolling his eyes, Rin calmed down and turned around to face the duo.

"Hi big brother, I am just here... delivering papers to your coach."

"You are delivering papers? Shouldn't you be training?" Sae wondered.

"Yeah, otherwise you won't be able to catch up to your brother or me." Sendo added.

"What a tragedy-"

"Alrigh Rin, we are done here! Ready to go?" The boy bit back a few curse words as he heard (Y/n) approach them. The older Itoshi and Sendo turned their attention back on (Y/n).

"Yeah, let's go. I am sure Ego-san will need you for something." Rin said as he grabbed her sleeve, but he was of course stopped by none other than Sendo.

"Hey wait! Don't you want to introduce us, Rin? Who is this cutey?"

The two stopped in their tracks and turned to look at the grinning boy, while Sae kept staring at her without saying a single word.

"Sure..." Rin said bitterly.

"Sweet! The name is Sendo Shuto, and yours?"

"(L/n) (Y/n)... nice to meet you." The girl said cautiously, a little bit unnerved by his smirk.

"Great! Can we go now-" Rin was again interrupt, but this time by his brother.

"Itoshi Sae, from the looks of it you are the manager of my little brother's team." Sae said, pointing at the badge. (Y/n) nodded her head, feeling a little bit more at ease with Sae than Sendo, but still kept her guard up.

"Yep! It's nice to meet Rin's brother. I heard a lot of you from the news and such."

Rin perked up at the way she had addressed Sae, since not a lot of people would call him Rin's brother, it was always the other way around. Sae noticed that too, and the way she was so nonchalant with him was off putting too. A lot of girls wished to be in your position.

"Did you hear of me too? I am our nation's star ace striker after all."

(Y/n) kept quiet as the gears in her head started turning a little, hoping that the name might come to her head. Meanwhile Rin was basking at the fact that this time, this one time Sae won't take something from him.

'Finally, she doesn't see him as the mighty Itoshi Sae, but as Rin's older brother. That felt good to hear.'

Sae meanwhile kept quiet, observing the girl and then his brother, who was sending him a victorious smirk.

"Sorry, never heard of you." (Y/n) spoke up, causing Sendo to deflate a little.

"Bit I trust you if you say that you are the star striker. Anyways, it was nice meeting you all, but Rin and I have to go. Good luck with the practice."

Just as (Y/n) said that, the younger Itoshi grabbed her wrist and tugged her away.

"Everyone is Blue Lock is a freak. How can it be that she never heard of me?" Sendo frowned as he looked at (Y/n)'s form before she disappeared.

"Let's go, Sae."

The said boy nodded his head quietly, new forms of interest and curiosity forming inside of him.

'What a weird girl... I wonder if she has any social media. Can't believe she called me Rin's older brother just like that.'

Meanwhile Rin was over the moon, happy that he didn't lose (Y/n) to his brother or his teammate. Honestly, he felt like proposing to her the moment she humbled both his brother and Sendo.

'What a day... a great day.' Rin sighed with one of his rare smiles.

"Are you alright, Rin? You seem a lot more cheerful now than 10 minutes ago." (Y/n) questioned.

"Yes! Never felt better, actually." The boy said quickly.

"There they are! Kunigami, Isagi look!" The two boys turned to look at the direction (Y/n) was pointing.

"I hope they aren't too nervous... I remember how you two were nearly jumping in excitement during your first official Bastard München match." (Y/n) laughed, remembering that day fondly as the two boys blushed in embarrassment.

"Well, this is a huge thing. And the stadium is full of Ubers fans cheering them on, too." Kunigami said, leaning against the railing as he stood to (Y/n)'s left side.

"I am glad we got these VIP tickets tho, it's less crowded." Isagi agreed from (Y/n)'s right side.

"Well being part of the Bastard München team is quite the privilege. I hope Noel-san will let us go watch the Manshine match too. Nagi said they will be playing against a big club from England." (Y/n) said absent-mindedly as Baro, Aryu and Niko ran to here they were.

"(Y/n), you made it... and you two too. I honestly thought you guys will be busy training." Niko said, sounding a little bitter that she was with Isagi and Kunigami. It just kept reminding him that she picked working with them over him.

"And miss our friends play? Never." Kunigami said with a smirk.

"Besides, today is our day off." Idmsagi shrugged.

"You guys look amazing! I hope you all aren't too nervous, in a crowd like this anything can be overwhelming!" (Y/n) said as Aryu sighed at her caring words.

"Nothing to worry about. With our skills, this game will be over pretty soon. I get even better." Baro said proudly, staring directly at (Y/n), who nodded her head.

"I am sure you all will do amazing! I can't wait till it starts! The uniforms look good on you guys too."

The last part caused the trio to blush as they nervously thanked her.

'She is just as sweet as I remember. I hope that German water won't ruin her hair though, my manager should never have an ugly hairday.' Aryu thought as he thanked (Y/n) for the compliment.

"Th-thanks... you look good too." Niko said nervously back, eyeing the girl a little.

'So cute! I really envy the Bastard München team for being able to see her like this everyday...'

"Well, don't pay too much attention to the uniforms. You will not be able to keep up with my attacks and scores." Baro said to the girl.

"I will keep that in mind, king." (Y/n) teased, not knowing how flustered the nickname coming from her made Baro feel.

'My queen is just the best.'

"Ahh they are at it again." Snuffy chuckled as him and Lorenzo watched the trio talk with the other Blue Lock members.

"They are close friends, I am guessing." Lorenzo stated with a raised eyebrow.

"They are more simps than anything. It was fun to watch them react to Oliver pestering the girl for a date." Snuffy laughed, remembering Baro kicking the football right into the said boy's head during practice once.

"She didn't agree to date him? That's a first."

"No, she said he was too extreme and obnoxious for her taste." The duo chuckled as they let the three Ubers players have some more fun chatting before the game starts.

[riririnnnn]

If we were to see the recent chapters of Blue Lock, then you can kind of sense that the storyline is getting Kunigami-focused which means that we are getting near the moment where the Wildcard backstory is going to be revealed. It makes the most sense to reveal it now, during NEL, especially when the Hero is battling his main villain, Shidou Ryusei.

I don't know about you, but for me, it'll feel out of place if the Wildcard backstory were to be revealed other than what is currently going on—it's is the perfect time!

That's why, I was thinking about it and went back to one of my theories that I had posted a while ago, and I realised something:

After the second selection had ended, Ego said this:

And before the second selection had started, Ego said this:

And to complete his sentence, we have this panel:

It's tough to say who is who but the top most silhouette low-key looks like Noa and the bottom most looks like Snuffy. The flags in descending order: France/Italy, Spain, Brazil, England, I don't know.

In present day, we have: Germany, Spain, England, Italy and France.

The above panel is from chapter 40 and the NEL starts about 150-ish chapter, so with 100+ chapter difference, some changes are bound of happen anyway.

Now!

Here comes the main focus of this post:

If you have read/remember my previous post regarding the Wildcard, then you might also remember that I had said that NEL wasn't planned.

BUT!

If we were to focus on Ego's words, then we can low-key conclude that NEL was supposed to happen, but in a very, very smaller scale compared to what we have right now.

And if we were to accept what I said above as the absolute truth, then it jumbles everything even more, you know.

Ego proposed the U-20 match during the timeline of Second Selection, so it means he had some time to think about the future. Then does it mean that he already visioned that BLLK Vs U-20 was going to be a massive hit? And when that happens, funds were going to pour in like waterfall and since JFU is money hungry, then they'd go in flow of whatever Ego says—did he see all of that?

What I said above doesn't sound much farfetched considering how intelligent Ego actually is.

To think that Ego made up the Wildcard after the U-20 match was scheduled makes more sense if we were to take into account that when the Blue Lock Man (Hologram Goalkeeper) was introduced, Anri complained that the funds are getting low. So, to run another program side by side seems quite tough.

I think Wildcard got more to do with Ego than Kunigami. The whole Wildcard thing feels like Ego's own selfish wish and Kunigami just, unluckily or luckily, happened to be the most suitable player for him.

The above thing makes more sense when we think about this:

If we dwell deeper into his words, then we get a deduction: Placing Kunigami in Bastard München was Ego's own choice not the former's. It seems like an indirect jab to Noa that, "Look! I created this dark horse, he is borne out of my ideal. I did it with my ideals, and he'll crush you."

You getting me?

Wildcard feels more like Ego's personal experiment rather than just a second chance to players who lost.

.

.

.

Old men angst Yaoi, LMAO.

[gullableh]

study

movie night

DON. LORENZO X MALE! KID! READER. PLATONIC.

★°•Warnings : overworking, swearing, bad grammar, terrible story telling abilities, might be ooc. reader is like 13/14, Lorenzo is 18/19 REMEMBER this is a PLATONIC story. So there isn't any romantic stuff in this story. I haven't watched the purge so I have no idea what type of movie it's like, all I know about it is its a horror movie ( I think )

★•°summery : kid reader has a test tomorrow, so as every teenage kid would do, he completely spends all his time learning for the test. Lorenzo's is kinda pissed that his younger brother won't even look at him. So why not have a movie night?★it has some fluff, but more like cute brotherly love relationships y'know?

Music you could listen while reading :D :------------------°•©

Blue monday; New order

Imitadora(instrumental; Romeo santos

Things to do; Alex g

Red eyes black dragon chain; Odetari

(Enjoy ^v^)

★

3rd person pov:

School. School is an teaching system where misters or misses learn the younger ones about math, art, music, physics and etc. my question is what do you think of school? Most people (children) say that it's a pretty boring system, some disagree with that jugment as they find intrest and delight within the school system. Well whoever find school interesting...needs to teach there ways, cuz how am I going to learn all this withing the next 4 hours huh!? *Points at a pile of Biology books.* "I'm going to fail this test" The child said wallowing in there own despair.

He shouldve payed close attention to the teacher, he shouldve taken notes, he shouldve studied earlier. Because maybe then he would have already learned enough about the subject, and wouldn't have needed to study so hard anymore for the subject, but all of these are what ifs and will never be reality. [Reader] had already spended most of there time on studying today, actually the entire day, without barely any breaks. He even skipped dinner (you can't skip dinner, you just can't end of discussion.) For this. They even had to decline there older brother for a quick soccer match. Lorenzo who witnessed all of the chaos his brother went and was going trough, had enough. He was ignored almost the entire day, he was declined to have a fun soccer match with him (ouch), and he even skipped dinner, the time where they both talk shit about his younger brothers classmates. No this was enough, [reader] had learned enough for the test, it's time for him to get some rest.

*Knock* *knock*

Looking at the person who knocked, a smile emerged on [reader]s face as they saw they're older brother. "C'mon smartass where watching a movie." He remarked while giving his younger brother a toothy grin, flexing his golden teeth in the process." Can't, still need to learn for this test."

[Reader] said with their smile slowly turning into frown, realization dawning on them again. With the quick wave of his hand and a small grin. "Dah, but you've been studying all day, it's time ya give those books a rest." He said with his iconic "dah" in his sentence. "Y'know I can't do that, I don't want to fail for this test. Snuffy will be disappointed in me" He answered back a frown still evident on his face. "So what, you already have perfect grades, and believe me Snuffy's not gonna get pissed just because of one bad grade. Or even if you failed all of you're classes, he still wouldn't care about that" Lorenzo said, his grin still on his face, there it was wide and proud. "No, I'm gonna stay here and study. End of discussion." Was the last thing reader said before continuing to read the book that he got from school. Leaving a slowly starting to get pissed of Lorenzo alone. He did not like that answer. Not one bit, so being the great brother he is...

He dragged him.

"LORENZO WHAT THE FUCK, PUT ME DOWN RIGHT NOW." "Stop screaming, it's not gonna help with you're situation." Lorenzo had [reader] over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. Yup only possible way to get you're younger brother to stop studying. (Snuffy downstairs like : 🧍‍♀️"I'm not dealing with that" *Sips out of a coffee mug*)

"LORENZO IF YOU DONT PUT ME DOWN RIGHT NOW, I SWEAR I'LL KNOCK ALL OF YOURE GOLDEN TEETH OUT OF YOU'RE MOUTH" "dah, id like to see ya try"

And so it continued, they continued bickering back and forth untill they reached Lorenzo's room, with a child over his shoulder, he opens the door of his room and dragged his brother inside. He placed him on a bean bag wich was right Infront of a large tv screen."I told you I'm not going to watch a movie." [Reader] snarked at the older one as they sat next to them, covering the both of them with a blanket and some squishys to stay warm with. "Oh c'mon, I even brough some snacks." Lorenzo said while magically popping out pop corn out of thin air. While having his stupid sly grin back. With a sulking aura surrounding the younger boy, they hesitantly gave up on trying to run away from Lorenzo, its impossible to get free out of his grasp. With a pout on [reader]s face they muttered out a small. "Fine"

Making Lorenzo completely thrilled and happy to spend some time again with his brother. "Sho wisht movie shoulds we wash?"Lorenzo asked while having a mouth full of popcorn. "Don't talk while having food in you're mouth idiot." Lorenzo just reacted back with opening his mouth and showing the disgusting horror of non-swallowed food, it's like he's a five year old child. "You're disgusting" [reader] remarked back with dotted eyes and a disgusted face.

The younger brother started to think wich movies they could watch. "Hmm, how 'bout.... Baby driver?" [Reader] said with an enthusiastic expression on their face. They saw an article online about the movie, it was a combination of a romance, comedy and action movie, sounds like a good movie right? "Eh sounds boring" Lorenzo said while still chomping away on the snacks, he should stop otherwise there isn't none left for me): . [Reader] looked at him again with dotted eyes. He didn't even know what the movies about and already though it's boring? "Alright then what kind of movie do you have in mind?" [Reader] said with a questioning expression on their face. Oh boy he shouldn't have asked. "How about..... The human centipede." That one horror movie everyone has been talking about. No thanks. "No, where not watching any horror movies."

"Aww, why not I always let you choose the movies ):"

"That's a lie, last week all we watched was what you chose."

"Yeah but that was last weak, this is this week"

"I haven't even chosen a movie yet"

"Me neither so I'm choosing"

"That doesn't make any sense!"

"Too bad so sad, where watching the purge"

The purge, aww c'mon, why always the horror movies? [Reader] though while silently sulking next to a very happy and enthusiastic Lorenzo, who seemingly was very satisfied with [readers]s defeat.

★

The movie just ended and [reader] was already asleep, resting their head against Lorenzo, Lorenzo silently gushed about how adorable his brother was. Its funny how they used to hate eachother. ( more like Lorenzo just being very petty) ever since snuffy adopted Lorenzo, he kinda excepted them to not get well with eachother, but after years. They really grew up to be great brothers, even if they weren't related.

The night ended, with [reader] resting his head on Lorenzo's shoulder asleep, while Lorenzo's head was resting on top of [readers] head while he was sleeping.

The both of them bathed in eachothers warmth.

Fin

★(smal) °•BONUS+--------------------

*Click*

The clicking of a camera could be heard, and who was clicking this camera? The only proud father in the house, snuffy

"Just a few small fotos here and there"

Snuffy would mumble to himself while knowing damn well he's going to have an entire foto album of the two brothers who where currently sleeping.

---------------------------

Snuffy 🔛🔝 of being the best dad tho fr Lorenzo gives off laid back and chill older Brother vibes.

[m1ckeyb3rry]

LMAOO im also chronically online this is a safe space for the chronically online dw (i also respond at chronically online speeds sooo) but FR THE UNHOLY TRINITY LMAOO if we add Raichi it’s the four horsemen of the apocalypse (bro has never played anything other than defense though and we like. NEVER see him touch the ball basically so uh sorry bro no sexy soccer time yet)

Honestly I don’t know why more people can’t just let people exist?? Like fr just leave them alone and live your life why make it so miserable for everyone sheesh…also please those twelve year olds on tiktok can’t even tie their shoe laces nor should they be on tiktok learning “potty mouth phrases” LMAO I think they need a reality check DESPERATELY

Never apologize for writing too much Karasu.

But LMAOO OK IM GLAD HAHA so real for that I can’t do what Reo or Barou do for him like I will not be the Anri to your Ego!!! Please put your socks in the laundry!!!! But this isn’t irl so he’ll still be a squishy bear to me

LMAO REALLL side character supremacy >>> Honestly I didn’t hate the animation either although I did notice some funky scenes it wasn’t nearly as bad as everyone made it seem…I’m glad to hear that they’re putting their eightbitussy into it though

He’s so captain it’s literally insane (quick we gotta talk more about this and manifest Karasu captain for u20 World Cup) Aiku honestly a good option too (I wanna see my man in action though) if it’s Isagi I’ll lowk riot

BESIDES AN EROTIC LEFT LEG GOODBYE that made me snort as I read this

I LOVE READING THE REFERENCES LMAOOO if they fit into the story keep them coming!!! (KARASU DROWNING SHDGSHSH IM NOT READY)

Ok yeah I also kinda ballparked that amount in my mind LMAO I forgot to mention this more in my last response but the ON SALE THING >>>> I laughed it was so goofy too like she caught him red handed THE NEXT DAY like bro those were NOT on sale…$50 for advice boy you’re not slick

Chefs kiss mc written wonderfully WITHOUT the typical overly used cliches as much as I love a stupid mc sometimes it’s quite an overused trope I feel where it’s the teehee dummy reader so again, this was refreshing LOL (I always love how you give your y/ns substance as characters and like humans..?? Like they all feel like actual people and aren’t your just your average w*ttp*d UwU MCs…I mean writers have to start somewhere so maybe I should stop bashing them like this but uh)

Honestly it’s such an interesting language which is why it takes me a bit to translate/transcribe sometimes because I can’t capture the underlying meanings or emotions as well in English LMAOO (the first time I tried was the hiori light novel and finding the correct phrasing was definitely a learning curve LOL) but omg slay you’re outperforming people living in the motherland!! That’s honestly really impressive, do you get to speak it frequently?

Snuffy’s backstory is actually so sad I can’t :(( also the SONG CHOICE??? Bye. But this is why I can’t even say “no one dies in soccer anymore” man

NO FR you know it’s bad when I’m impressed by a healthy family in bllk shdshhs HAHA FAIR TRADE INDEED o7 I have chapter 2 ready it was longer than I expected but I sped up the process using dictation as I read it LMAOAO so again if you catch any typos or weird punctuation lmk LOL (when I tell you I almost died dictating this I LAUGHED and reacted like omfg and it caught me saying that and wrote it down but ANGWAYS I’m not sure anything is beating this chapter) I know I said summary earlier but I don’t think I’m capable of doing that LMAOA so this is basically just the entire chapter I just reformatted it in a kinda summary like format because I don’t wanna keep pausing to type so many quotation marks HAHAHA anyways enjoy! I’ll come back to discuss after you read it so I don’t spoil anything yet hehe

Signing off early so it doesn’t weirdly attach to the end of the LN section LOL

-Karasu anon

2-Honor Student:

In elementary school, Kenyu was an honor student. Although he was a little cowardly, he was first and foremost, a kind, hard-working kid. he always did his homework and happily greeted everyone. Got along well with his peers and never fought. He was someone that both his classmates and teachers could rely on. When it was time to choose class president, Tomoda nominated him, and everyone joined in agreeing to nominating Kenyu. But after half a year, something shocking had occurred.

Little by little Kenyu had become better friends with his seatmate Tomoda, frequently going to his house after school. Tomoda had a kind sister three years their senior. She would often give them candy and play games with them. One day, Kenyu had gone over to play with Tomoda, to be told by his older sister that he hadn’t gotten home yet and was possibly taking a detour. She told Kenyu to go ahead and wait upstairs for him, but he wondered if maybe he was meeting with other friends in the park. He wondered if he too should go to the park, but it’d be troublesome if he had assumed incorrectly. While he was lost in his thoughts, Tomoda’s sister suddenly came up to him and brushed away his bangs. His hair had always been soft, and his mom had always helped him style it, so the Tomoda’s sister had always complemented him, saying his hair made him look so handsome like a model. It wasn’t unusual for her to touch his hair, but that wasn’t all that happened that day. In addition, she kissed his forehead. His eyes widened as his brain was left short-circuiting. “Huh?”

“My beloved Kenyu, let’s play together” she had said with sparkling eyes. Kenyu could feel his heart racing. “…I’ve gotta go to the park..!” His face turned bright red and he ran out. He didn’t end up, going to the park, but instead of ran back home to his room, waiting for his racing heart to still.

“My beloved Kenyu” He had repeated her words in his mind. he didn’t really understand it all, but he was happy that she said she liked him. He was a bit embarrassed, though that she had kissed him. He thought himself, “I’m never telling anyone about this.”

The handsome class president and honor student. By the time he became a second year, he had grown taller, adding to his versatility in giving him athletic potential. as he continued growing, he came to be one of the tallest in his grade. He was fast at running, and he was always the last one left in dodgeball. Then, of course, came Sports Day. After comparing all the times in their PE Class, Kenyu’s high ranking had gotten him chosen for the relay race. Everyone was in agreement. He was tall, fast and the perfect fit for the job. He was to be the anchor for the relay race. Was it really all right for him to play such an important role? he felt a bit uneasy, but he would give his best once again for the people relying on him. Until the day of the sports festival, Kenyu would run every day. He’d wake up early to run and practice dashes on the field after school. Every Sunday, he’d have his father time him. Finally, it was time for the class relay. Under the clear sky, the fastest runners would compete while the cheer squads cheered them on. Kenyu’s class, 2-1, however, would compete in vain. After each grouping, members of his team would slip down the ranks. By the time Kenyu got the baton he was in last place. There is a huge gap between him and the top, all the people running in front of him are the fastest in their class after all. But Kenyu had to try his best. Everyone had chosen him as anchor after all. He steadily started accelerating, passing by another player in just a quick moment. With his large physique moving vigorously and his feet firmly stomping against the ground, he gradually closed the gap between the other runners. His classmates all cheered for him, and as they continued supporting him, he continued gaining speed. Even the announcer from the broadcasting club got caught up in the excitement. With the loud cheers under the blue sky, Kenyu passed the final goal, bursting past the four other racers and finishing first. It’s the first time he’d ever run so fiercely. His chest heaved as he caught his breath. Kenyu had finished first for the sixth graders. His classmates had showered him with praise, wearing a big smiles on their faces as they crowded around him. Kenyu thanked them for their support, feeling that their cheers had powered him on. Kenyu was honest and sincere. He didn’t know he could run that fast. It’s because everyone had believed in him that he was able to discover a new part of him. To Kenyu, it was an incredibly joyous moment. A few days after that, when he got home, a shiny soccer ball was waiting for him in the doorway. Kenyu was surprised and had wondered what it was for. His parents had thought it would be good for him to give soccer a try, seeing how he was so fast. It would make him more popular too. After seeing that their child had such amazing speed they suggested that he try out a sport and bought him a soccer ball. Of course his mother also wanted to see him popular. Immediately, Kenyu went outside and tried kicking the ball. As he ran with the ball, he found that he couldn’t stop. He’d kick it forward and chase after it continuing on. “This is fun!”, he thought to himself. In all honesty, being able to dribble without losing speed is a technique that’s difficult for beginners, but Kenyu, blessed with incredible athletic ability, was able to do it from the start. That’s how Kenyu “met” soccer, his parents had blessed him with the opportunity. As if it was fate, Kenyu found himself absorbed in soccer.

i wonder what sexy soccer even is 😭 like what does it entail yk…HAHA chronically only gang rise 🤩 tumblr truly is the site for people of our kind i love it

the craziest to me is when they freak out about non-teenagers watching shows and writing fics meanwhile they are openly thirsting for old ass characters?? why are you at fourteen writing paragraphs abt every position you want to fuck toji and nanami in 😭😭😭 look i’m not going to judge too harshly because wtvr i get it but also like some of them need to realize that those in glass houses should not be throwing stones

the karasu tabito tag is basically mine atp DJSKDK i think every karasu fan has probably seen at LEAST one or two of my posts (whether it’s a fic or just one of my karasu shitposts)

EXACTLYYYY YOU WILL NEVER CATCH ME BEING AN ANRI there’s only room for one high maintenance person per relationship and that role is fulfilled by me 👆🏻 that’s why my other favs are karasu barou and reo…you know those kings are NOT letting their partners suffer 😫 however in fiction nagi is my squishy cuddly fluffy dog bf so he is still number one in my heart 😩

if it’s isagi i’ll be mad because he doesn’t even feel like he has any interest in being captain 😓 i think aiku could work but agreed we def have to see more of him plus i don’t think he’d be made captain as he’s not an og blue locker yk?? OMG but if the trend continues we should be able to manifest karasu as captain…holding a prayer circle now 🕯️🕯️🕯️ (lowkey it would be funny if ego made like kurona or niko captain just because they’re the only ones that aren’t batshit insane and typically keep their speeches and vocab relatively normal 😭)

the way eita didn’t think she’d check if they were actually on sale too is so funny like she’s been dying to go there did you think she wouldn’t go and ask if the sale was still going on?! SO not slick omg i love him though…but $50 FJKSKS idek where he got that type of money from

i do enjoy writing a good old dumb/oblivious reader every now and again but i do think they have to be done right to feel believable!! personally all of my y/ns and mcs are based off of aspects of my own personality — some closer to my actual self than others ofc — which i think makes it easier to flesh them out because it’s just like “okay what would i do in that situation” LMAOO most of my side character ocs are based off of people i know too which again makes it easier to make them feel complex because it’s like “right so how would ___ react to that happening to them”…sometimes they end up not even being that similar (tullia in pomegranate ink is NOTHING like my irl best friend that she’s “based off of”) but just thinking of them as real people helps me treat them as such in the narrative!!

haha yes everyone does start somewhere so i never try to hate to their faces but i think it’s okay to acknowledge a general trend/pattern!! like there’s a difference between saying “your specific fic sucks i hate how you wrote your main character” versus being like “i think a lot of fics in x fandom have this problem with characterization”!! to me it’s not hate because people can decide whether that applies to them or not yk?? and yeah the wattpad uwu mcs are truly smth…or the ones that are meant to be “badass” but are really just loud/rude/make overly sexual jokes and swear a lot 😭 a lot of the times at first it’s easy to make characters as stereotypes/caricatures of themselves or have them composed of cliches but i do think most people grow out of it i quickly!! just a phase we must all go through i suppose…i will be the first to say i was cringe when i started writing that’s why half of my old works are private now 😩

HAHA OUTPERFORMING INDEED it’s so funny whenever i visit india my relatives tell me it looks like my voice is being dubbed over because i speak such good hindi but i’m very pale by indian standards so i look like a foreigner 😭 which omg ik that’s such a stereotypical thing to be saying like “no i don’t look like my race” when you very obviously do but just this last january i visited india for the first time in six years and people IN INDIA (including literally people i’m related to) thought i was either irani, afghani, or from spain 😓 they’d get jumpscared when i’d speak to them in hindi KSDJKSAN their lives would flash before their eyes as they tried to remember if they had talked shit abt me 😩 i speak it a bit at home and with all of my extended family that’s kind of the only language they know so when i call them i speak it!! i also just have a really really good memory (hence the lack of studying) so i don’t forget things which helps me pick up languages rlly quickly

SNUFFY’S BACKSTORY KILLS ME it’s so sad yet also realistic??? like it really feels like smth that could’ve happened irl yk (idk if it’s based off of smth or not) but on the other hand yuki’s is so normal i love it 😍 the fact that he got into soccer in such an average and chill way too LMAOAOAO my unproblematic goat!! although the sister thing is so funny…i’m assuming this is a different friend’s older sister than the one he fell in love with at age 10 because according to egoist bible she was 16 😭 and this girl is only three years older than him so they must be diff?? lowkey crazy as hell omg even in elementary school yuki was pulling 😰 i always interpreted those two facts (his first love was his friend’s 16 year old sister and his first confession was when his friend’s sister kissed him on the forehead) as being abt the same person and it being like the 16 year old sister was just kissing him because he was a cute little kid and he misinterpreted it/got embarrassed because he had a crush on her if that makes sense?? but ig they’re different people entirely!!

[popculturebuffet]

Monthly Muppet Madness: Sesame Street Luis and Maria Valentine's Day Special (Comission for Emma Fici)

Happy valentine's day all you happy people and welcome back to monthly muppet madness. All the muppets you can handle once a month. And for this special day of love and chocolate we're going down to sesame street to look at the love story and wedding of Luis and Maria.

Now this one was a bit of a challenge for two reasons: the first is that my Seasame Street knowledge is limited: i know the 2010's decently enough as I watched a ton of it when my niece and nephew were toddlers, and I reviewed Follow that Bird last year, which was exellent.. but I really don't know who most of the cast are as characters outside of the major muppets and even some of those escape me as many have been phased out over the years. I mean why they don't use the two headed monster ine verything is beyond me, he's a two headed monster> that's awesome.

Thankfully the muppet wiki is super expansive so if like me you didn't know these characters going into this article yoru great. If you did, well... go get some juice or a pop while I fill in the blanks.

Luis and Maria were both introduced in season 3 of Seasame street and lasted all the way to 2015. Luis was introduced as the owner of the local fixit shop, a kind man who fixed bikes, toasters what have you. He also fixed them for Snuffy before knowing he was real. They were dropped off and picked up by... oh let's say moe. He's notable for playing the longest lasting mexican american roll on a television series and Seasame Street celebrated his heritage frequently. Sesame Street did not fuck around and I appricate that. Maria was introduced as a local teen who worked at the library, aging in real time and quickly becoming a young adult. She soon started working with Luis at the fixit shop, getting hired by simply pitching in when he was too busy to actually listen to her ask for a job and being hired on the spot as it helped with his work load. She later asked for a raise... only to not only get THAT but be promoted to partner.

So the two already had a working relationship and friendship when Sonia Manzano, Maria's Actress, got pregnant. Rather than dance around it Seasame Street decided to integrate the story, but since it was the 80's by the time of this pregnancy, they also needed Maria to get married first because GASP apparently kids couldn't handle the idea of a single parent. Or a multiracial couple as her previous love intrest David, was also ruled out though the why is a bit murky: One documentary said his actor was leaving anyway , another said he was devistated. I wouldn't rule out an 80's tv show avoiding an interracial marriage to avoid scandal.. but I also think Seasame Street was progressive enough to try it anyway, so i'm inclined to belivie the actor simply wasn't avaliable, especailly since the idea was pitched by Carol Spinney's wife Debra and passed on to Caroll himself. Given the two characters were already close as friends, buisness partners and on good terms, having them do the relationship upgrade makes some sense: while friends to lovers CAN be really tricky, here it just feels wholesome: like two people who were simply friends for a long time, caught feelings eventually and fell in love.

So today we'll be covering the two realizing their in love and thent heir wedding day. I wish I had something for the middle but Sesame Street.. is hard to track down these days. Most of it WAS on max.. but Max being max, a lot of it was removed and digtially most of seasame street is best of compliations and what not. There really isn't a consitent, episode by episode archive for the show that I found. So I found two complitions on youtube covering parts of this storyline. I am sorry that I coudln't find a more in depth one covering the whole thing up to the wedding, and would be glad to cover more of their story in the future. For now though let's tell the timeless tale of man and woman brought together by two 5 year olds asking difficult questions.

Part 1: In Love So the Luis and Maria story has a LOT of parts to it, and like I said I could only find so much on youtube. I tried archive of our own too, no luck. So before this the two started growing from friends to something more after tending to a baby bird... and not the normal one they tend to what lives in the back of their store.

The building feelings pay off here.. but first what most people come to seasame street for: two five year olds arguing: while playing Cowboys, Big Bird wants to go Eha Eha, and Snuffy wants to go Eha Eha Eha. Somehow it's far from the most gripping cowboy dillema i've seen

Gordon easily solves the issue and the two get their eha's on when they notice Maria and Luis holding hands. We don't see it because they only have a set for that part of sesame street, but it leaves the boys confused and they decide to go ask the adults up front.

Luis and Maria.. have no adquate explination for why they were holding hands and i'ts hilarous, mostly beause it feels so REAL. Kids will oftne ask questions that end up super awkward simply because they don't know any better. The two REALLY don't know how to answer this, saying adults do it because they like each other not because they need to, but not sure how they feel about each other. Until an idea hits

But since it would they instead realize their in love and go to tell each other and we get a really sweet well done shot as we look in on the fixit store through it's window as the two confess. it's some really well done acting and really cute.. then they shut the curtain so all of sesame street dosen't see their live sex celebration.

That night Big BIrd asks when their getting married which panics the two especially since you know THEY JUST STARTED DATING. Again it works because it's a harmless kid thing and Big Bird is just a giant toddler. But he bets they will

And he's right though there's according to the wiki a whole ass arc where everyone in sesame street is pressuring the two to get married. I mean Delgado's pregnancy is part of why they speed it up and as a show for younger kids they don't have to really get into emotional complexity... buuuuut it dosen't make it any less hilarous that all the muppets are wondering when this couple's going to get hitched already depsite being none of thier buisness.

Eventually Luis proposes, we get some planning and now it's time for the wedding.

Part 2: It's Your Wedding Day

So we get to the wedding, as everyone prepares: Maria's been so nervous she can't sleep while Luiz

Maria talks to linda, her bestie and just the best. Linda is kinda sorta dating bob, the og sesame street human and local teacher, the two even getting a mental duet about possibly getting maried and Linda catching the boquet. Both of these things go nowhere but given the two never married anyone else, I like to think they just had a quiet wedding officiated by kermit off screen.

Anyways everyone prepares for the wedding day with a big fucking musical number, as you should, and then has the wedding to one as the soon to be weds panic internally, the various adults and their relatives sing about how in love they are , and Oscar hopes fo ra fight because of course he does. Also elmo looks like Oscar slipped him about 80 ounces of cocaine because he is TRIPPING BALLS the entire cermony while panicking about dropping the rings.

Hey kids, just a life lesson if the garbage monster on your street offers you cocaine to help you relax before a wedding, don't take it. he's probably just wnatin ga laugh at your expense. Also just.. don't give 5 year olds cocaine. That's not a good thing to do. And don't shake them.. unless your Larry david then that sorta thing is just expected of you and you'll be dealt with later.

This message has been brought to you by popculturebuffet and the two penguins on my desk.

The wedding ends up working an dis beautiful. Also oscar the grouch somehow got a plus one, his girlfriend grungetta who i'm somehow just finding out exists. Oscar was getting it on the reg and not ONE of you fuckers thought it was a good idea to tell me. Good for him. A reception is held and everyone is happy... well almost everyone.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!

[nenekobasu]

I don't know if u ever read the arcs previous to the NEL but I was reading one of ur Hiori posts and you said something like "I don’t want every issue of his to be resolved in a single match". I'm pretty sure it has happened before but bc Isagi inspired them (Chigiri and Bachira, and in their cases it made them more independent, not followers). If you've read those parts I wonder how you felt about them and if it feeds into something else. Also thank you for feeding my Kaiser and Isagi conspiracies 🫶

i haven’t really touched other arcs because kaiser isn’t there. while i do know a few things about what happens in them yukki is my reference point for how characters use isagi to resolve their issues within a match. i don’t really mind it by itself. i think it’s pretty unique that charas use isagi as a device for them to solve their problems instead of connecting with him emotionally; i’m assuming that’s what happened with chigiri and bachira too. 

i may be resistant for it to happen to hiori because it’ll feel incomplete. hiori grapples with many problems that all feed into each other but i think the main ones are “can’t enjoy soccer” “pressured by the expectations of others” and “only seen for their talent, not as a person” (the first could be a consequence of the second and third). the foreshadowing is that isagi can help him resolve the first (and second, if the solution is to “expect something of yourself instead”), but that doesn’t automatically solve the third problem; if anything, isagi has a tendency to only see others for their abilities, so it might be a mistake to assume he can be of any use there. moreover the theme of “talent” (undoubtedly a central theme of v.italy) is told primarily through the stories of snuffy/mick and kaiser; i think this would make it unnatural for the third problem to be solved through isagi as well.

so while hiori can use isagi to work through some of his issues, it would be strange for him to use isagi to resolve all of them. actually, i think it’s impossible. “not enjoying soccer” is not hiori’s (only) central problem, so “enjoying soccer with isagi” feels too ‘clean’ of a solution. ultimately i feel hiori is too burdened for all of his problems to be solved so simply or so quickly.

this ask forced me to think about hiori and isagi a little more, so thank you for sending it. i’m also happy to lend support to any and all kaiser-isagi conspiracies. 

[berrymoos]

heyheyhey :)) ik you might wanna focus on other fandom agere stuff and that’s ok but i keep thinking about little!eleven from st and how she’d be so curious and weird in her own way and just AAAAA so any thoughts on little!eleven hopper? (also i love your blog <33 OK BYEEE -🐝)

snuffy i'm going to be so honest, i wasn't planning on making this into a full hc post but i started having more thoughts than i thought i would have 💀 (HNDHDJWU DAAH thank uuu hngkskx💞💞)

ミ﹒﹒💛🧇🐝🌻✨🫶

🧇 — regressor eleven headcanons!

as you said, she explores eeeverything with her hands – touching, grabbing, feeling ,, literally everything! the party love themselves a curious tot el .... until she tries touching a hot stove top or reaches for the hornet's nest in the park bc she has got to know exactly what this thing is, which means she has to touch it with her bare hands to understand

speaking of, the party all know of her regression & pitch in to help (*´˘`*)♡ max, lucas, & will could classify as her "main cgs" — mayhopclair agenda <33 & will big bro cg supremacy!! — but she loves everybody very much 💞

her regression doesn't have a specific age?? she acts differently & has particular skills depending on whether her regression is positive or vent-y – very mixed bag

hopper carries her around on his hip during her vent regression spells – el never asks; just one moment shes sitting on the floor, sulky & staring into space, the next she's way in the air, supported by strong arms & love <33

LOVES eggos with whipped cream & syrup with chocolate chip on top, kinda like what hopper made her in s2 (iirc). the hopper-byers fam have it like once every month or so bc it's almost disgustingly tooth-achingly sweet. joyce balances it out by adding their sliced fruit of choice on top

can, will, & has used her powers to reach the sweets joyce hid on the top cabinet. to her credit, joyce is excellent with hiding them ... but el is equally as excellent at finding them. no matter how obscure the hiding spot is, she'll find them. always >:-)

SKATING WAAABAAAA ꉂ(ˊᗜˋ*)♡!! she's not all that good in bigspace to begin with so it's not like she magically gets more balance when she's in Tot Mode 💀 given el is very very quiet abt her regression & doesn't like to be out where there are lots of ppl, max suggests they take her this abandoned skate park she found! it's perfect!

(no it's not, max & mike got into an 6-minute argument about el potentially face-planting into concrete & it ends with mike relunctantly agreeing IF ONLY she's got elbow pads, knee pads, AND wrist protectors)

lucas has a (baby) bag (technically it's el's but shhh) filled with bandaids, snacks, extra clothes, backup pacifiers ... literally everything useful you could ever imagine is in there bc lucas can never be too prepared. it's a scooby-doo bag!!

mike gets his pillows stolen by her & max for blanket forts, but they never tell him what they're doing with them. he'll ask “why do you guys keep stealing my pillows?” after el runs in to take his third one, but she'll giggle & run away. max tells him to mind his business & leaves. he finally gets up to see them making a blanket fort when will walks in to “borrow” his blanket

el & stickers? match made in heaven. every opportunity she gets, she's sticking them on something: the fridge, the toilet lid, dustin's cheek. EVERYWHERE! she even has a sticker pages specifically for her friends and family ,, she has them choose a sticker, she unpeels it, & sticks it on them like “ ‘ticker for you ... an’ a ‘ticker for you ... an’ dis one is for you...”

regressor max & regressor eleven duo says who? SAYS ME (﹡ˆ﹀ˆ﹡) those two are a mischievous duo, ask ANYBODY in the party 💀 max has such a foul mouth in & out of headspace, but she tries her best to keep her foul language at a minimum, but sometimes she slips up (especially if there isn't a cg around) & eleven just .. repeats her. max is like “ no no no el!! u can't say that!!!”, but she actually finds it hilarious & lowkey doesn't care HBSJDJE

(she doesn't care until a cg is around & el drops an sh-bomb & lucas specifically slooowly turns his head toward her💀💀)

self-indulgent pkmn au headcanon: el & mew 💞💞 mew is equally as curious as el is, so they explore new things together! ... while the rest of the party & their pokemon watch them like hawks to assure neither of them are trying to poke an exposed power cord

[malicious-code-103]

MoominTales Chapter 3

Desperate Times, Desperate Measures

(Link to introductory post/Family Tree)

It was a beautiful day outside. Birds were chirping, children were playing, the leaves were dancing in the dappled sunlight.

And today was the day that Moomin was finally going to break through Snufkin’s obsession with Animal Crossing.

It had been weeks since his boyfriend had acknowledged that he existed outside of a cartoon character in a video game. When he wanted to talk these days, he had to send Snufkin’s game character letters in the mail! He was at his wit’s end.

And it all boiled down to today, but Moomin was ready. Today this would all end.

Part of him felt a little guilty about what he was about to do, but he thought of his uncle Sans to push the thought from his mind. If he wanted to introduce his boyfriend to his new family, he wanted Snufkin to be presentable and not a walking corpse! Normally his love was so witty and cool and, a bit of a rebel. It made him purr and rubbed his pelt just the right way.

Surely his new family deserved to see that side of Snufkin, and not whatever this was.

“This is for you, Snuffy,” Moomin whispered, before opening the door. 

“Snufkin?” He murmured, as the room slowly creaked into view. Strewn mostly in shadow and dirty dishes, mounds of clothing and blankets surrounding a tiny TV and an exhausted figure slumped in front of it.

“Ah, Moomin,” Snufkin said, hoarsely. He was more purple bags than eyes at this point. “I am visiting the store, let me buy you something.”

“O-Okay Snuffy. . .”

“-They have a waterbird in stock today, Moomin. A very good deal-”

Before his boyfriend could realize what he was about to do, Moomin quickly darted forward and unplugged the gamecube from the wall.

“HAH!” He yelled. “Now all of your progress is lost, and you have to play with me instead of that horrible box!”

It was childish, but it was the best plan that he had come up with.

Snufkin didn’t react, but one of his eyes blinked out of order with the other.

“Not to worry, Moomin. I save every fifteen minutes just for this exact purpose.”

Carefully, he plugged the gamecube back into the wall and started to turn it back on.

Panic ran through Moomin’s mind - he needed to stop Snufkin from playing at all costs!

“No!” Moomin yelled, and grabbed at the gamecube, ripping it away from Snufkin. “Not without the machine you don’t!”

With precision and the speed of a Cheetah hunting a gazelle, Snufkin grabbed at the gamecube, furiously. Moomin struggled to hold onto the machine with all of his might.

“Snuffy you have to stop playing! It’s killing you!” 

Snufkin wasn’t listening, scrabbling at the machine like a screeching cat caught in a trap. There wasn’t any noise except for his desperate tugging, but Moomin knew that he heard screeching - in the deep, depths of his heart.

“Give up!?” Moomin demaded shrilly. He had a grip of steel - nobody was getting anywhere near this gamecube unless he wanted them to.

Snufkin said nothing, but his hands suddenly became too fast for the naked eye to perceive. With precision, he ripped the memory card from the machine and plugged it into another, identical gamecube, which he materialized from under the blanket pile.

Within seconds, Animal Crossing was back on the screen.

“I am not going to buy you the waterbird anymore,” Snufkin said, slowly. “You’re getting the Daruma instead.”

“But that thing is so ugly!” Moomin screamed, reaching his wit’s end.

More than anything, he just wanted to spend quality time with his boyfriend - was that too much to ask?! Was he such a monster just for wanting to be held, to be loved, to be actually paid attention to except when there was a good deal on Joan’s stupid turnips?!

With a tiny, pathetic, carnal scream, Moomin threw himself forward and plucked the memory card from the game.

“I would like to see you play without this!” He yelled, and threw the memory card out the open door, where it disappeared into a gooseberry bush.

Snufkin immediately went as still as a corpse, abruptly enough to send a chill down Moomin’s spine.

“I’ll help you look for it later,” Moomin said, through a clenched smile. “But now we are going to have a conversation, okay? I missed you, Snuffy!”

Snufkin stared at him hollowly, his expression dazed and very empty - again, like a corpse.

“What would you like to talk about, Moomin?”

He was starting to worry him a little. . .

“Um. . . about the Harvest Festival next week, you’re still going to come, right? And meet my fam-OH mY GOD YOU’RE BLEEDING!”

Blood was running from Snufkin’s nose like water from a faucet, staining the entire bottom half of his face red.

Moomin screamed, yanking a (mostly clean) napkin from the floor and handing it to Snufkin, whose dazed expression was only getting worse.

“What?” He asked, while the two steady streams of blood ran from his nose. “Oh. . . I-I feel a little bit. . . unwell, Moomin. I am going to lie down. . .”

With that, Snufkin quietly and gently collapsed into the blankets, until his face disappeared from sight.

“Oh my GOD I’ve kILLED HIM!” Moomin screamed again, tearing at his hair. “I’m so sorry Snuffy!! My god I’m so sorry!!!”

Giving another pathetic scream, Moomin raced outside and threw himself into the bush, desperately scrabbling for the little memory card with its stupid little drawing of Rover the cat. Sobbing the entire time that he had killed his Snufkin and that this was all so unfair and that he was a monster and would rot in jail-

It took him a few anxious minutes to find the memory card - scratching up and down his arms in the process. But he did find it, and ran desperately back inside to plug the thing back into the machine with his shaking paws.

Immediately, the music started up again, and the little character began his journey across the title screen once more.

Almost instantly, Snufkin shot back to his feet, and blankly reached for the controller.

He was still as robotic as ever, but the sharp focus was back in his gaze. Unlike the corpse-like disorientation from earlier. And he was still horribly pale, but at least he looked a little bit better.

But Moomin felt anything but better, trapped in this impossible situation.

What was he going to do?

“Moomin,” Snufkin said, with blood smeared halfway across his face. “Look, I found a fossil.”

[talkfastromance4]

Ghost of Me-- Luke&Lily oneshot

Yeah, um. Lie to me and Ghost of You came on while I was driving and this is....what happened. I’m sorry.

Word count: 2705

donate to my ko-fi here :)

Masterlist

Luke&Lily masterlist

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

• • • •

Luke enters his house solemnly, his shoulders are hunched over as he tosses his bags at the end of the couch. He examines the room and a year and a half ago, it would be like nothing’s changed. But a lot can change in three months.

Three months he’s been gone on a short leg of tour and while he’s left before, this one hit him harder. He greets Petunia half-heartedly as he walks down the hall, and he peeks inside her room and his heart stops.

Lily’s toys are gone. Her bed is stripped. The whole room is empty. 

Like a wave, the fight you and him had crashed into him. He shut the door and went to fall onto his bed, subconsciously he fell on your side and he could still smell the faint scent of your lotion. Your words and his words swarm in his head.

He remembers thinking that he got this right, leaving you and Lily but then coming right back picking up where you left off. But the more frequent it was that he left, the harder it became. He began to distance himself from you right before this mini three month tour began.

You fought so hard for all three of you and all Luke did was give you and Lily a kiss as he left for the airport. No I love you, no promise of calling.

No calls. No texts. No photos or videos were exchanged within those three months. It was radio silence as Luke went through the motions of performing and doing interviews. He was a ghost of himself and the guys tried to help and talk with him but he isolated himself. He’s good at that. 

So he shouldn’t really be all that surprised that you and Lily weren’t here waiting for him with open arms as if all is forgiven. It cuts through him like a branded serrated knife. 

It’s three a.m and the moonlight’s testing him as he sits at his piano. The ivory’s shine from the glow of the moon and memories of him playing Lily’s Lullaby while you held her in her arms swim in his head. Sometimes Lily gets so tired she fights sleep, and even though you’re usually good at getting her to sleep, it still renders difficulty.

Combined with your calming rocking and Luke’s voice singing to her, she’d fall asleep within seconds, bunny clutched under her chin. 

To drown out the memories, he takes a shot of tequila he has on the piano ledge and fills it up once more from the bottle. His phone buzzes and he’s reminded yet again of what he’s lost.

You and Lily’s smiling faces smile back at him and he scrolls through the album he’s created of his girls. Well, not his girls anymore. 

Lily’s shouts for you wake you from an already restful slumber. You haven’t been sleeping all that well since Luke left for the tour. It pained your heart but his hesitancy before he went away was answer enough that the relationship couldn’t continue. 

It took three days without contact for you to finally gather the courage to gather all of yours and Lily’s things and bring them back to your townhouse. It was still yours even though you’d moved in with Luke and you’re thankful the mortgage was already paid off on it because you had somewhere to run back to. 

“Hey, shh, it’s okay honey,” you hush to Lily lifting her from her crib. She’s crying slightly as she squeezes your neck in a vice grip. “Did you have a bad dream?”

“Lu,” she cries and your breath catches.

Even though she wakes like this every night, it still puts you in shock at just how much she misses him too. It breaks your heart but he made his choice. You hadn’t expected him to suddenly be a blue suit guy who works a 9-5 job and become a family man, but you also hadn’t expected him to get cold feet a year and a half in the relationship. You also hadn’t expected him to ghost you.

“I know baby, I miss Lu, too,” you sniff patting her back.

“Lu sing,” she sniffs.

Another pained twist to your heart. You gathered her snuffy and shuffled back to your bedroom. You connected your phone to the speaker and selected her song from the album Luke made for her. 

While his voice crooned her to sleep and her breathing slowed, you cried silently into your pillow as you listened to his voice. 

You ached for Luke, and each night having to play this for Lily made it even worse. 

****

It’s day three of being home alone and Luke’s been avoiding the living room like the plague. It’s where Lily would always dance along to the Disney movie she’d be watching and more often than not, Luke would dance with her. 

When she’d be tucked in bed he’d pull you against his chest and dance with you while he sang softly in your ear. 

Dancing through our house with the ghost of you never rang more true. 

Luke has taken a shower twice a day since he’s been home. The water is scalding as if he thinks it will rub away his sadness and this continued ache for you and Lily. He stands below the water, letting it trickle over him but he finds no relief. 

Lily’s giggles and squeals echo in his mind wherever he goes in his house. Her sitting in her high chair feeding Petunia. How she’d climb onto his piano bench and press her tiny fingers to the keys thinking she was playing music. How she’d try to climb up into his bed to cuddle with you and him.

The memories were eating away at him, tormenting him more and more by the second. 

All he had to do was call. Find your name (that still had the two pink hearts next to it) and press it. 

But would you really pick up? He was an ass, he knows he was, so how can he fix this?

Ashton has tried calling, and so have Calum and Michael but Luke chooses to wallow in his own pity that he created. He dug this hole, now he’s got to be buried in it.

On Thursday evening he’s got some movie on just for background noise and he stares blankly at the screen. He recognizes Adam Sandler but he doesn’t know what the plot is when there’s a knock and a ring at his door. 

Jumping to his feet thinking it’s you and Lily, he races to it and has to push piggy away. He’s shocked when he sees Cory standing there, hands in his pockets. 

“Hey man, can I come in?” 

Luke stares for another moment before he’s nodding and steps aside. What’s he doing here?

“Um, can I get you a drink?” Luke asks a bit awkwardly. It’s not that he and Cory don’t get along, they do pretty well. Cory’s come to some of the Friends of Friends shows and to some of the cookouts Ashton or Calum have. 

“Nah, I’m good. Uh,” Cory turns around rubbing the back of his neck. “How are you doing since they left?”

“I haven’t left, if that answers your question,” Luke sighs. 

“Look, I sort of know what happened. Y/N told me after she and Lily moved back to the townhouse but take it from me, don’t let them go. I let them go once and I’m so thankful Y/N let me in Lily’s life. Don’t make the same mistake I did.”

“Has she . . . said anything else? About me?”

“They miss you like crazy. Lily asks for you all the time, she never goes anywhere without her bunny. I mean, she didn’t before, but if it’s out of her hands for half a second she throws a fit. Y/N says she wakes up every night crying for you,” Cory tells him quietly.

Luke’s eyes sting with tears and he covers his escaped sob by a cough. That little known fact cuts deep. He clears his throat before he looks back up at Cory expecting to see pity but he sees understanding in his eyes. Lily’s eyes. Luke’s never noticed that before. 

“Why are you telling me this? I know how you still feel about Y/N--”

“Because I know how much she loves and misses you, too. I’ll always love Y/N, we have a history and a good friendship but she’s in love with you, Luke. And I’m okay with that because I still have her and Lily in my life. I like you too,” Cory laughs, “and how you look right now is what I looked like for over a year before I saw them again. Lily’s only been coming by me on Friday’s for the last couple months. Y/N will be home alone tomorrow.”

Luke’s nodding to everything he says. 

“Do you think she’ll take me back?”

“I don’t think . . . I know she will.”

Cory walks to the front door and Luke follows behind. 

“Hey Cory,” Luke says and Cory turns. He holds out his hand. “Thanks for coming by.”

“No problem,” Cory smiles, shaking his hand and opens the door. “I expect to see the both of you at my place picking up Lily.”

****

It’s a light drizzle as Luke drives to your house, he’s tapping the steering wheel nervously. He hopes Cory is right and that you’re home. He hopes you’ll let him in and accept his forgiveness. When he pulls to the curb he sits for a couple moments trying to gather his breathing and relax his heart. When neither works, he gets out and that’s when it starts pouring.

He hopes this isn’t a sign of what’s to come.

He runs up the walkway to your door, cold rain pelting him as he bangs on the door and presses the doorbell frantically. The light above the door flickers on and he sees you through the curtains of the small window on the door.

For a moment you just stare at each other, your eyes wide in shock before you wrench it open. 

“Luke.”

When you say his name he doesn’t even think before he’s colliding his lips to yours, bodies crashing together. You react all too willingly, pulling him inside by the lapel of his leather jacket. He kicks the door shut behind him, locking it in his wake and you take that opportunity to peel his jacket off him. 

It’s tossed to the floor in a wet heap and Luke’s hands are on your waist bunching up your shirt. Lips moving furiously together, he pushes you against the wall spreading your legs open with his thigh. You moan quietly and Luke breaks the kiss only to lift your shirt up and off. 

His piercing blue eyes stare into yours as his thumb traces your lips prying them open so he can slip his tongue inside. You close your eyes and moan at the all too familiar feeling, your fingers working on the button of his jeans.

Luke pulls you away from the wall so he can make his way to your bedroom. You bang against the hallway walls like a pinball, clothes getting discarded along the way. Lips never leaving lips.

When you’re finally on your bed, Luke hovers over you, his necklaces dangling in front of your face. You comb his wet curls away from his face staring up at him and he stares back, your breathing is heavy. You’ve missed him so much and he’s finally here.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers bending his neck down to give you a soft kiss.

“I know,” you murmur curling his hair behind his ears. You stroke your finger down his nose, trace his cupid’s bow and caress his cheek. “I’m sorry I left.”

He collides his lips with yours again and you both scramble to get the blanket over his body, the rain was cold and he’s wet so you didn’t want him to catch a cold. Luke pushes himself into you, you both groan at the stretch of him attempting going in dry. 

But you’re both so desperate for each other, you couldn’t wait for foreplay. Luke held his cock at the base, head down as he concentrated on sliding into you. He rubbed his tip against your folds, hitting your clit and it caused you to moan which aroused you. 

“C’mon, c’mon, c’mon lovie,” he pants with each attempted thrust until he finally slides all the way in. Both of you moan at being joined together once again, your nails dig into his shoulders as he pulls out and enters you again. 

“Oh yes, Luke,” you sigh, closing your eyes at each pull. 

He finds a steady rhythm, gliding and pulling with ease. His left hand is near your head while his right holds onto your stomach as he fucks into you. You’re both moaning and sighing as he accelerates, you open your legs wider so you can cross your ankles on his lower back. You aid him to go faster by pushing on his back and thrusting your hips up into his. 

Luke sucks on your neck and kisses the base of your throat until you’re gasping out your first orgasm. He hums along with you.

“Fuck, Y/N, always feels so good,” he breathes and attempts to kiss you.

Your bodies rock and jolt so it makes kissing difficult but you can feel the love there. Luke rotates his hips and somehow speeds up even more until he groans and pulsates inside you. You feel his warmth seep into you and you gasp at the feeling, tugging on his hair to bring his lips back up to yours. 

After you both catch your breath and disentangle your sweaty, sticky bodies, he cleans up his mess and is quick to join you in bed. He peppers kisses along your forehead and your chest, anywhere he can mumbling ‘I love you.’

And because you both know each other so well, you don’t have to discuss what happened. It just did, it was a small bump in the road but you’re okay now. You will continue to be okay but when Luke told you “I want you and Lily in my life forever” you couldn’t deny the elation you felt from the finality of his statement. 

****

You stayed up most of the night talking, kissing and touching. You were getting familiar with each other again and after you spent the first half of the day in bed making love, it was time to get Lily. 

Luke is just as nervous as he was the first time he was going to meet Lily. His knee was bouncing in the seat as you drove to Cory’s house and you reached over to still it. 

“She’s going to be ecstatic, baby, trust me,” you smile at him. 

As you pull into the driveway, the door is already open and Cory smiles when he sees Luke in the car. Lily is in his arms and Cory points just as you and Luke get out of the car.

“LU!” Lily exclaims and wriggles from Cory’s grip. 

She runs as fast as she can, giggling and squealing as she does and Luke runs to her as well. He scoops her up in his arms, cradling her head as she hugs him tightly and he does the same. 

“Oh my sweet, I’ve missed you . . . hi my sweet girl,” he sighs, closing his eyes, finally feeling like his heart is whole again by having this little girl in his arms again.

“Dada, dada, dada!” she rambles and Luke opens his eyes in alarm. 

Cory nods at Luke as if to say it’s okay and he moves to console you, you’re crying at the reunion. 

“I love you so much, Lily,” Luke says and kisses her head multiple times. She pulls back and he wipes away the wetness on her chubby cheeks. 

“Dada stay?”

“Yeah, dada’s staying,” he smiles and kisses her nose. She hugs him tightly again and you join in on the hug. You’re all put back together again.

• • • •

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[ratsoh-writes]

My curiosity got me, so here is my submission for a match up.  Sorry it’s so long!  I look forward to seeing your reasoning.

PERSONALITY TRAITS:

MOM FRIEND:  I’m the friend that is almost over prepared for any situation and is protective, usually keeping others out of too much trouble or danger, but not stopping them from doing that stupid thing.  Some people will only learn from doing it and so long as it won’t seriously injure or kill them, go for it.  And I mean I am seriously prepared for most situations:  I have fluffy throw blankets and pillows in my car for those who get cold, extra towels just in case we somehow get wet, umbrellas/ponchos for those who need one, snacks/water just in case someone gets hungry/thirsty, first aid kit for small injuries, etc. Ironically, I am the only one without a kid so far.  

Extension of this would be my habit to act as the friend “nurse.”  Willing to spend hours taking care of a friend who isn’t feeling well and give platonic cuddles if needed.

Another extension of this is my need to feed anyone who comes over.  I think my love language is acts of service after typing all this. 

I’M LISTENING:  Always willing to offer an ear, even if I don’t believe I can council you.  Plus, for some reason, people just end up splurging life stories or something that is bothering them to me.  My life is mostly spent as that Naruto meme: “I have no clue what is going on, but I’ll pretend that I do.”  But I’m responsible about it, I won’t offer advice I’m not sure about and will usually refer you to someone else I feel is up to the task.

PATIENT:  Earned after years in customer service dealing with toddlers disguised as customers and also with friends who far exceed my energy levels.  It takes a good bit to anger me or very specific things to set me off, such as when I have asked you to please stop bringing up that stressful memory of mine again and again. 

I am told I am terrifying when I’m actually pissed.  Most times I don’t remember much when I actually snap, just that it happened, but details are fuzzy.  

CHILL:  My counselor once told me if I “Was any more laid back, I’d be on her floor.” And to a point, she is correct.  My house was on fire and my reaction wasn’t panic at the time, it was this odd calm that even when I reported the fire to my sister and authorities, they didn’t believe me until I showed them said fire.  I am reserved with those I don’t know well or are not comfortable around.  Once I trust you or you get me on a topic I love, I’m surprisingly passionate and animated.  

I feel this fits under here, but I also tend to do things at my own pace.  And not much can change that pace, but I will get what I set out to do done.

WHY ME?:  Too many people tell me I’m a natural leader, even got awards for it, but I never volunteer or want to be the leader in anything.  Usually, I just end up in that role somehow, some way.  Most times because I hate disorganized messes and those times the people I am with have trouble making concrete decisions and need some guidance to work out what they really want to do or the pressure to actually make a decision.  I may be an unwilling leader, but I will step up if needed.

WHIMSICAL:  Sarcasm, dry and sometimes cheesy humour, and an attitude to boot, but it’s rarely to be mean.  Most times it is me being playful and if I’m teasing you, that usually is a sign I like you and enjoy your company.  Plus, sometimes people need a little laugh or a spark of different emotion to get them out of a funk.  

INTEGRITY:  I could absolutely despise someone, but like hell I’m going watch them suffer.  In the same sense, if I take a job, I will do it right and not half ass it.  And far too many times I’ve had to step in and explain certain concepts in order to disperse negativity or help others see from another perspective to avoid adversity.  

CUDDLE BUG:  With people I am comfortable with, I am a cuddly person and do not mind a lot of skinship.  I am used to friends hanging all over me.  Plus, sometimes I just want to curl up someone as well.  

  STRENGTHS:  

Observant

Good communication skills & honest

Responsible & reliable

Full Size Human Heater.  I am ridiculously warm and always putting off heat.  Friends and coworkers alike use me as a portable heater.

Surprisingly good at being sly and collecting information if needed, like getting a shoe or ring size without tipping the person off it’s for a gift.  If they manage to call it, I always fess up and playfully make a fuss they ruined the surprise.

  WEAKNESSES:  

Terrible at lying, so I tend to simply keep my mouth shut instead

Willfully oblivious to flirting and absolute flustered mess once I am forced to recognize said flirting

Vast open waters terrify me

Tendency to keep my troubles to myself and try to solve problems on my own (don’t want to be a burden)

Can become despondent if I feel useless at times

  HOBBIES:

ART:  I’ve dabbled in several different medias, but my favorite is just a pencil or pen and any paper I can get my hands on.  I love drawing figures in dynamic poses.  Second favorite is sculptures built from wire.

COSTUMES:  I love Halloween, since it is the perfect excuse to make and wear my homemade costumes.  It also lets me challenge myself by making more complicated pieces like hooves, horns, and even chain mail.

BAKING/COOKING/CANDY MAKING:  I’m the cook in the house and I love it.  Seeing people enjoy my food is my favorite part.  Just don’t ask me for a recipe, I literally don’t have any and I won’t remember what I did.  

ORGANIZING/CLEANING:  I love puzzle games like Tetris and Catherine, and I love a challenge.  Combine the two by having me organize and rearrange a space to make it work and I am in heaven.

STORYTELLING:  When a story needs to be told, I am the one asked to tell it. Specifically I have such an entertaining way of telling it according to others.  Animated and colorful language, plus a few pit stops along the way with some side stories.  

  PET PEEVES:

CONTRARY:  Do not tell me to do something while I am doing it.  That will kill any motivation I had to do it.

BACKHANDED COMPLIMENTS:  It is possible to compliment someone without insulting them or others at the same time.  It just makes the compliment feel empty and negative.  And I tend to just hum and not reward that behaviour.  

TOO MUCH ATTENTION:  I don’t mind attention… from people I trust and are comfortable with.  Feel free to cuddle and coddle away.  But vast amounts of attention from those I feel are strangers or acquaintances will unnerve me (I have literally left functions immediately  where I walked in and was bombarded with shouts and attention aimed at me-sensory overload I guess).

  ODD HABITS:

NESTING:  No, I don’t think I have enough blankets and pillows.  Yes, the giant stuffed animal is needed and his name is Snuffie.  

CRUSH ME:  I’m serious, some days I need one of my friends or my bf to just lay all their dead weight on top of me.  It’s just oddly therapeutic.

NO, I’M NOT PREGNANT:  Just cause I ate that jar of olives in one sitting or suddenly was craving jalapeno juice and crushed ramen noodles.  There are never enough pickles and yes, I am determined to try every kind–I may have a vinegar addiction.

IRONY:  I bake some of the tastiest, sweetest desserts and make pralines and caramels, YET I myself do not favor sweet things. 

HANDS:  One thing I tended to do with nearly every boyfriend and guy friend I had was play with their hands and put their hands on my face/head.  I lived for being pet and having people play with my hair.    

NONVERBAL MOMENTS:  Sometimes words are just too much, so I instead make sounds.  Can be anywhere from a growl to a cat like noise, or the reliable “Nyeh.”

NO NOs:

I think I listed a few as I went through everything else, but ignoring boundaries is the main one.  If I tell you I’m not comfortable with something, do not make me repeat myself.  And usually that something is given a pass the first few times it is done before I say something and explain why I’m not comfortable with it.   

Example:  I have thick, curly hair, a product of my mixed heritage.  Well, sometimes I like to straighten it and I did just that one day.  Well, a coworker decided to make a backhanded compliment, stating I should stick to what works: straight hair over my natural hair.  I had gotten on him about it, but I decided to vent to a friend about what happened as well.  She proceeded to constantly repeat those hurtful words and while I knew she meant it playfully during those times, I had to stop her and sit her down, explain I don’t find it funny cause the words are linked to a hurtful, possibly racist memory that I didn’t want brought up again and again.   Thankfully she understood and stopped.  So, I don’t snap immediately and I understand sometimes a sit down needs to be done.

Ok first of all I gotta say that I absolutely loved reading your matchup!!! It’s so well organized, detailed, and the descriptions are pretty creative!!! Do you do any writing yourself, because you should!!! alright, geek out moment over.

i’ve got three guys you’re perfect for, but let’s go for the obvious one. HONEY!! 

You’ve checked off everything on honey’s list: caring, organized, laid back, and good for cuddling. Now here’s what he has to offer to the table: he will cuddle you back. This guy is the ultimate cuddle slut. You’ll never feel unloved with him. Honey is also a very thoughtful and appreciative guy. He likes caring for his partners. You may be the mom friend, but he’ll do his best to return that love as well.

Honey is a little awkward, but he’s also sensitive and empathetic to how others feel. If he puts his foot in his mouth, just tell him and he’ll never bring it up again. Plus this guy is just so honest and genuine that backhanded compliments aren't really a thing with him. 

Also you like costumes!!! He’s always wanted to try cosplay or theatre. You just might be the person to give him the courage to finally stick to one. 

dating honey includes:

cuddles upon heaps of soft things. He has his own collections of ridiculously soft blankets and pillows that he’ll happily add to your collection. Honey is also a master at pillow forts. 

honey is a good listener. He’ll be happy to just sit back and enjoy the stories you tell. There is start though, who is also the storyteller of the underswap home. Any funny story you give about your time together will be rewarded by star with a funny story from his and honey’s childhood, much to honey’s embarrassment

if you don't really like sweet things but love baking them, then honey and star will happily finish them for you. People are usually surprised about how just how much skeleton monsters can pack away. 

he’s a picky eater and will give you the wtf face when you fufil your weird cravings though lol 

Oh! Also if you’re wondering, the other two would’ve been either oak or coffee

[doc-pickles]

it’s nothing funny just to talk (p. 1)

What happens when you text that random number graffitied on a bathroom stall in your favorite bar? Jo Wilson is about to find out. - In which Bar Princess and Doctor Evil Spawn meet via text.

More Jolex on your timeline because y’all seemed to love what I posted before! Also I’ve posted this whole piece on AO3 as well so it might look familiar.  

this idea came to me in a fever dream and i am not sorry that y'all have to deal with it. 99% of this fic will be in "texting" format, so be prepared for that. 

Jo is regular Alex is italics

Saturday 11:04 PM

heeeeey is thiss doctor evil?

I gotta say ur phone sex namee needs sum weerk

u soud like a comic book village 

fuck

village

VILLAIN

Who the hell is this? And how did you get my number? 

i’m just a girl at thee bar!!!! 

Joe’s Bar?

noooooo

i’m at enerlad city bar

You didn’t answer my question. 

u asked a quesitoon?

whata was it?

i’m goos at takifjg tests 

How’d you get my number?

it qas in the bathrooom!!!

it said “for a good tiem txt dr evil spawne” 

so I did

I am ready to havee fun

You’re drunk, obviously, and I’m going to have to kill Cristina for putting my number up. 

ooooooh is thatt ur girleifnd?

hirlefiend 

girlfriend**

Wow you’re really gone. And hell no, she’s my roommate. One of them. 

ooooh how many do u hav

roomees not girlfriends 

Three. Two girls and a dude. 

intereeesting...

well it’s tome for fireball shoots

steph is yeeling at me 4 txting too much

goodbey doctor eviel apawn!!

Oh lord. Tell Steph you need water. Or an IV. 

I’ve got her. she’s throwing up on her shoes. thanks doctor. - steph

  Sunday 10:11 AM

You know you’re pretty funny, Bar Girl. 

jesus christ what fucking time is it?! 

10 AM

I’m assuming you have a massive hangover. 

hold on I can’t hear you over the sound of me vomiting

TMI as the kids say these days. 

what’re you a grandpa or something?? 

No I just don’t know how to use text lingo. Except WTF. I know that one very well. 

quick question

who the fuck are you?

Dr. Evil Spawn. You found my name graffitied in the bathroom of Emerald City Bar. 

holy shit

I thought I dreamed that... WHAT THE FUCK

Nope. I’m real. 

holy shit i’m so sorry

my texts were so annoying

Who hurt you? I mean you were shitfaced, I’m assuming someone broke your heart into tiny pieces. 

the opposite actually, I was at a bachelorette party

not mine, i’m so single it hurts

Ahhh that makes sense. So you got shitfaced in solidarity? 

exactly you get it

you seem like you’d be the DD at a bachelorette party

Well seeing as I’m a dude I don’t do Bachelorette parties. 

Well I did go to one, but that’s a different story.  

hmmm you seem like a very interesting man doctor evil spawn 

going to bachelorette parties, living with women who aren’t your girlfriend 

OMG ARE YOU DATING THE GUY YOU LIVE WITH?!

George? No absolutely not. And before you ask, my other girl roommate is gay. 

so you’re single?

i’m only asking so when you murder me the police have as much information as possible

Haha very funny. I would be a terrible murderer. 

you didn’t answer my question

Fine. Yes I’m single. 

i’ll note that in the “serial killer file” i’m building 

gotta go, I have to do work :/

Have fun, don’t die. 

  Sunday 8:38 PM

Arizona is trying to set me up on a blind date. 

who’s arizona?

My gay roommate. She wants me to meet this “bubbly blonde” she knows from her pilates class. 

ahhhh. why don’t you go?

Bubbly blonde is not my type. Sounds like she’ll spend the whole date talking about how much she loves dogs or her knitting hobby. 

Plus she does pilates, that tells me more than enough. 

you’re making some good points. I don’t pity you. 

You better not. How was work?

the longest day of my life

it was just paperwork, I don’t actually work on the weekends

What do you do?

hmmmm that’s exactly what a serial killer would say

i’m an elementary school teacher

Oh so you sing and dance and paint pictures all day?

what school did you go to?

were working on multiplication tables and basic photosynthesis tomorrow

Wow that sounds like a lot.

it’s may, ive got three weeks of school left so I have to cram all the crap we didn’t cover into these last few weeks 

Ahhh that sounds more accurate.

and what do you do? 

besides text strangers that you don’t know

I’m a pediatrician. 

oh so you make kids cry and wipe snotty noses all day? two can play at that game

Well we both have to deal with snotty noses sooo...

I GET IT!! Doctor Evil Spawn!! 

why evil spawn though? 

I wasn’t this nice when I started med school. My personality is an acquired taste. 

ha! that’s a funny joke. 

so if you’re a fancy schmancy doctor why do you live with three other people?

I’m only a resident, not making the big bucks yet. Everyone else is a doctor too. 

are they all pediatricians?

No. Arizona is too but Cristina is a cardiologist and George is a trauma specialist. 

interesting!! I too live with my coworkers. it’s not fun. 

the table is always covered in craft supplies. 

Well I can never read the grocery list on the fridge. Stupid doctors script...

oh that’s a classic. you’re pretty funny Dr. Evil Spawn

Thanks Bar Girl. 

I gotta go. monday tomorrow and you know how fourth graders can be. night!! 

Night . 

  Monday 9:47 AM

there’s not enough coffee in the world for monday mornings. 

  Monday 10:52 AM 

Sorry I was yelling at the interns. We have a decent coffee cart here. Keeps me alive. Are you texting in class?

no it was recess

now they’re at spanish class

i’m not totally irresponsible 

Oh good to know the future of America is in good hands. Teacher Princess is “not totally irresponsible”

teacher princess?

Well, Cinderella lost her shoe, you puked on yours. Same thing. 

wooooooooow

that was so uncalled for...

I thought it was funny. Gotta go set a broken arm. 

broken arm vs. adverbs... can we switch? have fun lol

  Monday 3:26 PM

I don’t even think I know what an adverb is. 

how did you become a doctor??

Don’t need to know adverbs to fix a couple broken bones and snuffy noses. 

oh darn I should’ve gone to school for seven more years then

Haha. How were the adverbs?

better than expected, grading papers while I wait for my roomies to be done

we carpool, saving the environment and shit

Okay Eco Warrior.

you text like a 60 year old man

you’re not a 60 year old man are you?

No I’m a 28 year old man though

28 a doctor and you’re single? your personality must be worse than you described 

I’m a busy man, I don’t have time to settle down. And I have no desire to. 

yet you have time to text a complete stranger? 

hmmmm interesting...

Ouch, that one hurt Princess. 

steph is making me socialize with the other teachers

if I don’t respond, they killed me or dragged me to an essential oil party

Hahahaha

  Monday 5:18 PM

Did you get roped into a pyramid scheme?

nooo but therew as wine

I should sotp drunk texting you so often 

It makes your presence that much more entertaining. And bearable. 

woah woah dude

i’m a gem 

I can tell. Elementary school teacher with a heart of gold. 

awwww your too sweet tome

It’s a Monday. Who the hell gets drunk on a Monday?

teachers

we deserve it

You’re a teacher and you’re single and still going to Bachelorette parties. You’re what, 23? 

i’m 25 and i’m doing greta thanks you very nuch 

cnat believe that i’m supplying my perosnal info to a serial killer

What makes you so sure that I’m a mass murderer? 

ur weird nickname and ur intimate knowledge of the himan body

Mmm yes well a good amount of women do find themselves screaming around me often. Or under me. On top of me...

omg are you sending me dirty jokes

you’re crazy 

What can I say. 

Gotta go, I’m on call tonight. Get to bed safe, Bar Princess. 

mmmkay thanks Doc

  Wednesday 11:29 AM

What do you think is worse: School lunch or hospital food?

hospital food, no doubt

thursday is mac and cheese day here... I could bathe in that stuff

We have Spaghetti Wednesday but that’s the only good thing here. 

mmm how depressing

the teachers do a pot luck once a month and that’s always good

the art teacher next door to me makes the BEST blueberry muffins. 

Lucky. All I get here is vending machine cookies. Anything interesting happening in the elementary world? 

a first grader got lice last week so naturally we all have it now

I had to chop off six inches of my hair

Holy crap. Lice can be vicious, be thankful you didn’t have to shave your head. 

it feels like I did, my hair hasn’t been above my shoulders since the backstreet boys were still touring

Wow. I’m glad to know you’re well cultured. 

of course I am

gotta go, kids are back from music class

Don’t be too hard on them, they deserve a break every once in awhile. 

  Thursday 3:06 PM

Incoming Voice Call

“Jenna you forgot your lunch pail. Have a good day!”

“Hello?”

“Hi Mrs. Peters. I didn’t grade Henry’s test yet, I’ll have it tomorrow. Thanks bye!”

“Helloooo?”

“Steph I gotta grab my things, I’ll be there in a seco- oh shit. Hello?”

“Bar Princess?”

“Doctor Evil Spawn? I must’ve butt dialed you, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay I... I don’t mind the interruption. Are you leaving work?”

“Just about, we’re wrapping up the solar system and I have to bring home the diorama.”

“I was never good at the models, I prefer working with the real thing.”

“Oh ho, a man that works with his hands. I can appreciate that.”

“You know now we’re officially talking and we still don’t know each other’s names.”

“Well around here I’m Miss Wilson, but you can call me Jo.”

“Jo. Hmm I like chicks with dudes names. I’m Dr. Karev but you can call me Alex.”

“Well nice to kinda meet you Alex. I’ll talk to you soon, I gotta get out of here.”

“Talk to you later.”  

  Thursday 4:34 PM

I wouldn’t mind if you were my teacher.

how did I know you’d send me something along those lines

I’m predictable. I’m still calling you Bar Princess. 

as you wish doctor evil spawn

I get to assist on a surgery today. Tonsillectomy. 

like removing tonsils? that’s awesome

for you, not for the kid

Oh she’ll be fine, she gets ice cream and jello for a week.  

okay yeah I might be jealous of her now

id love to be off work for a week and have you waiting on me hand and foot

the ice cream is a nice bonus

You think that’s my job?

well you said you aren’t making the big bucks yet so.... yeah 

Keep dreaming. I’ll talk to you later, gotta scrub in. 

have fun!!!!

[riririnnnn]

Alright, I'm here to speak for my husband.

I'm new in Tumblr, so I don't exactly know what people think about Noa here, but as far as I have seen in other places, people generally say that he is the worst coach in NEL.

WHICH IS NOT TRUE AT ALL!

*screeches and rips out your wig*

Firstly, no coaches forced/pressurised anyone to choose their teams. It was one's own wish to go wherever the heck they want. Further, Ego explained everything about each stratum individually, so one knew what he was going in for.

So in no particular order, let's start.

1. Lavinho

Bro

BRO

You are telling me that this:

Is a better coach than Noa?

I agree that the whole speech by Lavi was actually fantastic, and further when Bachira told him about his Monster, not so surprisingly, Lavi told him exactly what he needed to hear because dun dun dun! Who chose FC Barcha?

YAS!

Bachira did, so obviously, it was the best for him and he improved.

Schizophrenia meets paranoia.

I mean, if he were to go in Ubers, Snuffy would've destroyed his 'originality'; if he were to go in PxG, he would've been outshined and pushed into being a midfielder, and in BM, he would've been depressed tbh. Manshine City is the only one which I think he could've improved physically.

All in all, my main focus about Lavi in this post is this panel:

Like, Lavi.

NO!

Guess who called him out for it?

Yes:

JUST LOOK AT WHAT HE SAID!

THAT'S MY HUSBAND Y'ALL!

I can't add more than 10/10 pictures per post, so I'm not adding it here:

In that same chapter (163) of the above panel, he calls out for Kunigami for the goals he missed, and then later (165) he asks him, "Now that you have seen it live, you think you can copy those movements?" If we consider his stoic personality, then it's his way of teaching.

Further, in chapter 164, when Lavi and Noa were going 1V1, and Isagi decided to jump in to steal the ball, Lavi used the blueberry boy as a way to get past Noa. Of course, Lavi was like, "Oh? Weaklings are just noise." LIKE HONEY STOP HE IS JUST A HIGH SCHOOL-ER!?

But yeah, Noa didn't chase Lavi further, and instead stopped to catch falling Isagi and explained him about the playstyle of Lavi.

BRO WHAT YOU WANT MORE!? HE IS NOT A BAD COACH!

2. Chris Prince

It's surprising, but his speech was hella good during the introduction.

And I don't mind that he strips and endorses stuffs. Like, do what you gotta do to get the bread in this economy. Besides, if I were a man and had a body like his, I'll be showing off too.

What, obviously, I'm going to show is this:

Like, the scores were 2-2, it was a PEAK moment, and he jumps in to take the spotlight?

Noa rightfully calls him out for it:

"This isn't your stage, Chris. Back off."

LOUDER FOR THE HATERS!

And you are telling me that Noa is a bad coach, huh?

Chris literally provoked Kaiser, made a near fool out off Yukimiya, and then started a beef with Isagi.

ACT YOUR AGE, CHRIS!

It's like someone throws me and you between Kindergartens, and then I start to write in beautiful cursive to prove that I'm so better than you.

3. Marc Snuffy

It's hypocritical, but the thing I called out Lavinho for, is the same reason why I wouldn't have gone to Ubers if I were a Blue Lock-er: telling the players what to do.

Starting from the start, we can see that Snuffy is one hell of a strategist, and was able to impress everyone.

However, it's been so long since NEL started that we have nearly forgotten that Blue Lock was made for strikers, and everyone selected were the forwards of their team. Like, fym Barou is the best suited to be a striker. Personally, I wouldn't have let it slide and would've started swinging fists.

Also, why are you trauma dumping into a 18 year old you met a few moments ago, just because he refused to play by your sayings.

Imagine someone tells you a story, and you go like, "Why are you telling me some loser's story?" And that someone replies, "Oh, actually, that was my best friend and he killed himself."

Are you getting me?

Further, I think Ubers got the better end of stick because:

Barou Shoei. No explanation needed.

Aryu Jyubei. He was literally the Top 3 during the second selection.

Niko Ikki. Bro is only 15 and hasn't even played for that long and was able to defend against Shidou and has meta vision.

Aiku Oliver. No explanation needed.

Sendou Shuto. Bro was literally the ace of (ex) U-20 team.

Don Lorenzo. Bro stopped Kaiser's impact

At this point, I'm getting my own emotions involved, but I didn't like how he just assigned everyone into positions. It felt like he molded them according to his own wants/needs that is, to win. I mean, he used data of the players to come up with a plan, right? Then why people think Noa is too reliant on numbers?

I'm not saying that Snuffy is a bad coach. Whatever he did, it turned out to work for the best. In fact, kudos for him to help Barou score by pushing Noa aside:

He is a good man and a good coach. Please don't think I hate Ubers.

4. Julian Loki

We haven't seen much of him, but if Shidou and Rin are in close quarters without trying to bust open eachother's skulls, then I think Loki is good at whatever he is cooking. Further, the fact that he is only 17, makes everything very impressive.

I know that we have already gotten a chapter focused on PxG, but it's not sufficient to precisely say how things got to be the way they are currently.

Also, ngl, I do think that PxG got the better end of the stick too:

Itoshi Rin. No explanation needed.

Shidou Ryusei. No explanation needed.

Tokimitsu Aoshi. He was literally Top 3 during the second selection. Like, even Barou couldn't defend against him (at that time).

Karasu Tabito. Bro is smart.

Tsurugi Zantetsu. Bro is speed.

Charles Chevalier. HE IS 15 AND ALREADY A PLAYMAKER.

Nanase Nijiro. Can't say much, but I think he is good.

The only problems are:

Itoshi Rin

Shidou Ryusei

Lol

.................................

To sum it up, Noa isn't a bad coach.

I do think it was a bit not-so considerate of him to just throw them into those physical tests because THEY ARE JAPANESE, NOA!? THEY CAN'T UNDERSTAND YOU!? If I were to be there, I would've been so lost like, Man, what you even want me to do?

Well, like I said earlier, everyone who chose the Germany stratum knew what they were getting into. Besides, Noa had made it crystal clear from the very start that if you want to play as regulars, prove it through your performance— what more do you want him to do!? Die or something?

Secondly, when Isagi came to his office/workspace whatever that is to ask for advice. He did give him one, in his own way. It was same like Lavi did to Bachi, and Chris did to Nagi, but each of them gave advices that reflected their own personalities.

Also, considering the environment in which he grew, one could expect him to be money hungry you know, yet, he was against of letting Isagi play in the match just because the sponsors wanted, and denied it till he forcefully agreed to let him play in, at least, one match. Even when he was subbing in him, he bluntly said, "It's fan service." This post isn't about Isagi, otherwise I would've mentioned how he proved his worth and THAT'S why Noa continued to let him play.

Further, I don't understand why people forget that in every match, Noa has explained stuffs to Isagi. For example:

Us Readers, take this as a narration about a character, and forget that in the BLLK universe, Isagi is the listener.

I don't think so that just because someone has an experience of doing something for long period of time, it also mean that they are capable of teaching others the same— Noa, I think, is doing his best; he literally, though for like a minute, let go of his striker position and did what was necessary for Isagi to score (chapter 201).

Just because Noa-Isagi interactions are highlighted more, doesn't mean Noa hasn't helped others too— he was watching over Kiyora and Igaguri practice, remember? Isagi is the protagonist after all, it makes sense for him to have the most spotlight.

To be completely honest, in the end, there is no definitive way of comparing all the coaches, it just boils down to what playstyle you have.

That's it, I guess.

.

.

.

Noa seems like someone who takes the meaning in the literal sense, like, someone be like, "He is such a Daddy material!" And he'd reply with a straight face, "I don't plan to have kids any time soon, but I appreciate that you think I'm worthy to be a Father." I just know he is dense.

[starr-fall-knight-rise]

Humans are Space Orcs “Paradoxical”

Part of the first contact series, I hope you like it. I was trying to throw in a few small things that you guys sent me that I couldn’t make an entire story out of. I hope you like that. 

He very much did not want to do this, he would rather spend a weak in the thorn-tail Glorg pit, but no, as a clerk to the Galactic Assembly, he had to do THIS….. it was almost worth it to think about quitting, but he supposed this job didn’t stack up to spending the rest of his life working in the Glorg pit, so he sighed picked up his Info-board, and headed out into in the crisp early-morning air. Ardus (the alabaster moon) was just beginning to sink towards the horizon. Tan’nas (Their blue moon still stood high in the sky. Their distant star was just beginning turn the sky a pale pink.

With trudging steps he made his way towards the distant edge of the city where the…. creatures had made their camp….. camp….. They were spending their time OUTSIDE, in…. in CLOTH houses like heathens… barbarians. WHO MADE HOUSES OUT OF CLOTH!

He took the last few steps slowly and with great caution, but heard nothing. With caution, he peeked into the cloth houses, and found them completely abandoned. He felt his circulation drop…. Not even 1/10 of a cycle, and he had already failed his job. It was the Glorg pit for sure now!

That’s when he heard the noises

In curiosity, and with a slight measure of hope, He turned following the distant thrumming through the ground. It was oddly…. Regular, almost mechanically regular beat.

Coming over the rise he nearly yipped in fear and fell back.

The humans were preparing for war…. Oh it was horrible, they walked beside each other in two terribly synchronized columns moving at the exact same timing and speed, a single beast with ten pairs of legs and ten pairs of arms…. And so, so many eyes. Their shadows marched beside them, long black cords of horribly perfect movement. He had no idea that humans had hive minds….. Oh, but they must being able to move like that. He had to tell the assembly. The humans began to move even faster now, keeping impossible step the rhythm of their feet jarring through the ground with a terrible power.

He couldn’t move, and while he was frozen, he finally noticed….. speech? It was barely recognizable as such spoken with that a sort of eerie rhythm.

“When my Granny was 91 she did PT just for fun!” The phrase repeated back, completely nonsensical as the humans jogged around the open field single body trampling delicate purple spindle-root. He had absolutely no idea what a PT, or a Granny was: ninety one of what?

“When my Granny was 95, she did PT to stay alive.” The mesmeric way they moved was almost to hypnotic to bare, and he scooted just a little bit closer.

“When my Granny was 97, she up and died and went to heaven. “ He was watching them from behind a rock now hoping they wouldn’t notice him in the high contrast landscape of morning.

“She met St. Peter at the pearly gate…. Said ‘St. Peter, hope I’m not late…. St. Peter said with a big ol’ grin…. ‘Get down Granny and knock out ten.” Together the column took another perfect lap chanting the whole wile.

“ON YOUR FACES!” He jumped nearly braining himself on a rock as the entire group of humans just fell to the ground onto all fours bodies stiff and ridged as they used their arms to push themselves away from the ground repeatedly, it didn’t really make sense.

They did many rounds of this before eventually leaping to their feet in perfectly aligned rows.

The human who had been calling instructions stood in front of the group, “LIEUTENANT VIR, wipe that idiot grin off your face!”

There was a pause, “Sgt. Can you tell him to do that?” One of the men wondered. The other human glowered at him.

“You’re damn right I can. Captain told me to keep an eye on his crazy ass self because he’s a reckless man child with a kink for being probed by aliens.” All the humans let of an odd repeated revving noise. He hunkered back into the rock.

A very lightly colored human on the front left of the group tilted his head, “Weren’t you stationed in Japan for a while, Sir.” The human was showing his teeth. The GA Clerk wasn’t really sure what that was supposed to mean.

“What are you implying lieutenant?” The man growled.

“Nothing Sir, I am trying to figure out which is worse: aliens or tentacles.” More of that odd revving noise broke up around the group. One of the humans didn’t make that sound looking around at his companions in what MUST have been confusion.

There was silence from the human until he to let off that odd revving noise then paused, “I don’t know kid, you tell me, some aliens have both….. Anyway, Were is that guy the GA were supposed to send?”

“You mean that guy right there?” One of the humans asked, before pointing directly at him.

He almost fell over and died. Right here in the early morning sunrise, his blood would paint the rocks blue.

All the humans turned to look, and then began approaching in an open line, the pale human, reaching him first, walked around in a wide circle as if he was examining his next meal. He felt like he was going to die. With his Info-pad held in front of him desperately, shaking he began, “The g-galactic as-assembly has asked that…. That I introduce you to our, our planet more formally, while peace talks…. Continue.”

“Cool, where do we start?”

He stuttered and stammered. Eventually the humans seemed to grow annoyed, “Why don’t we walk around and you just answer questions?”

That seemed fair.

He didn’t do anything that day accept for watch the humans as they entertained themselves. Of course these crazy creatures insisted on heading to the most dangerous areas starting by the Nion River (meaning the death river locally). Crouched in the bushes, the humans listened to the wildlife around them eyes scanning the area predatorily. A nearby Drig let off a chirping whirring noise.

The humans lifted their heads looking around. The light human raised his hands to the others, and then, amazingly, he let off that same whirring chirp. It was amazing, before long, the rest of the humans were mimicking the noise, and they were surrounded by a flock of Drig. At least it was amazing, until the purpose of the mimicking ability became apparent, and one of the humans sprung suddenly from a crouched position flying with all her predatory instinct through the air, catching one of the unsuspecting creatures midflight.

He chirped covering his eyes. The humans grew up in a sudden frenzy of noise, and he imagined them terribly tearing the poor creature apart with their teeth. When he opened his eyes, he saw something completely different.

“Look, you hurt it.” The light skinned human rebuked. Looking over, the clerk found the human holding the creature in his cupped hands. The other human that caught the creature dropped her head.

“I didn’t mean to hurt it, is it ok?” She reached out a hand to touch it, but the other human pulled his hands back closing them over the creature.  The other humans were gathered around trying to get a look. The pale human pulled back from them, “No, if you guys can’t contain yourselves around the wildlife, than you don’t deserve them.” He opened the palm of his hand using a single finger to stroke the creature’s head, “Isn’t that right, Snuffy.”

“You named it?” One of the humans asked, peering over his shoulder from the left.

The pale human shrugged away, “Yeah, I did, so be nice or shove off.”

He watched the humans in surprise and confusion as the pale human carried the Drig in the palms of his hands while the others crowded around him trying to get a good look. The humans had caught the creatures…. And then…. Named it, and were now caring for it? None of that made sense in context.

As they walked, the strange group of humans kept mimicking the wildlife, the more complex the sounds, the more fun the humans seemed to have trying to mimic it, they whirred, they buzzed, and they growled and popped over and over and over again. Most of the time he wouldn’t have been able to pick out the difference between the human and the animals, it was actually quite amazing.

They walked around for a few more hours like that stopping to feed the humans at the top of a hill watching as their third moon Demnis (the jade moon) rose above the horizon. It was larger than their other moons and was a lovely delicate shade of green at the height of summer. The pale human had taken off one of his boots and was allowing the injured creature to rest there in the light of the sun looking half dazed and confused as the other humans walked over to make sure the creature was ok, sometimes leaning down to stroke it on the top of the head as they did so.

After eating, the humans began some of their odd hunting war games with each other. He was sure they were practicing their skills as killers, stalking, and wrestling, preparing themselves for the perfect moment to kill. He made sure to hide himself well back from the group as a pair of humans got into it. It was the pale human with one of the others. They were standing using their hands in an attempt to throw the other to the ground and make hi submit to a more dominant force.

After a moment of struggle one of the humans managed to dislodge himself from the entanglement and push the other, hard, in the chest. The creature made a yip of surprise teetered backwards, landing on their back, overcorrecting and then bouncing head over heels to land on their side, and then go tumbling down the hill. All the humans rushed over to the edge, to make sure the other human was ok, but that didn’t really make sense…. Hadn’t he done that on purpose?

“Hey, you ok!” the lead human called down the hill

“Yeah, I’m good!” Jus at the bottom, the human hauled himself to his feet brushing dust from the front of his uniform like he hadn’t gone tumbling down a hill just now….. Humans must be indestructible.

“Was it fun!” The pale human yelled as the man pulled a rock from his boot.

“What?” he seemed confused?

“I said, was it fun!” he called again.

“Well….. Actually yeah, it was kind of fun.” The pale human turned to another and showed his teeth again.

“That’s a good enough answer for me.” And then without any provocation, the human threw himself down the hill. WHAT! Was this some kind of penance for almost hurting his own kind….. Punishing himself? But then one…. No two…. Four of the humans followed after laughing and whooping as they did so. They rolled and bounced stiff as boards arms tucked against their chests gaining speed until they finally rocketed past the other human and into the grass making that odd revving sound as they did.

One of the humans tried to raise, and toppled over sideways much to the amusement of his companions.

Once all the humans were standing again, they shuffled their way up the hill and…

DID IT AGAIN.

He just wanted to go home, he just wanted to go home and pretend this day never happened, why were the humans so scary, why did they have to be so confusing and doing insane things. They were hunters, but they would take care of the small animals they caught. They would play fight with others, and then ask if they were ok when it was done.

They threw themselves down steep inclines like it was some kind of game.

Stupid

Paradoxical.

[darkspellmaster]

So About the Bert and Ernie thing….Facts and Fiction…

So, recently writer Mark Saltzman did an interview for the blog Queerly (You can read it all here) where he talked about his time on Sesame Street. 

Edit: He also gave a statement regarding this to the New York Post. (You can read that here)

Now this is important, the questions in the interview, vs. the headline are vastly different and the actual article has a lot of information regarding his time with the Workshop and his connections to the cast and crew. So of course because Bert and Ernie come up everyone goes hog wild when he answers the question. Problem is, no one is reading it correctly or writing it correctly. So I want to help people break up the Fiction from the Facts in regard to this situation and the two puppets.

So let’s start with the easy things.

“The Creator of Bert and Ernie...”

FALSE: Firstly Mark Saltzman is not the creator of Bert nor Ernie. Both Muppets were created back in 1969, and were performed by Frank Oz (Bert) and Jim Henson (Ernie), with the idea that Bert was going to be based on Frank and his personality and Ernie was based on Jim and his. The idea for the set up as the two best friends living together was – more than likely – based on the then well-known screwball comedy movie “The Odd Couple”. This movie stared Jack Lemon as the uptight neat freak Felix, and Walter Matthau as the fun loving slob Oscar, which was written by Neil Simon, and came out a year before Sesame Street Debuted. If you look at the set up for Bert and Ernie, they are pretty much Felix and Oscar, with the addition that they act like Frank and Jim concerning their viewpoints and personalities. Jim was perfectionist at times but also a goof who liked to screw around as was Frank, but he was more serious at times, than Jim was. However, both men were professional. A lot of Bert and Ernie come from them developing a solid connection in their friendship and, reportedly, both characters are based largely on when both men were kids.

“Mark Stated that they were gay.”

FALSE Mark in his interview did not state that either character was gay. Rather he stated

“Ok, so we have to address—that’s the big question, right? In the writer’s room, you’re all adults. Were you thinking of Bert & Ernie as a gay couple? Did that question ever come up?

I remember one time that a column from The San Francisco Chronicle, a preschooler in the city turned to mom and asked “are Bert & Ernie lovers?” And that, coming from a preschooler was fun. And that got passed around, and everyone had their chuckle and went back to it. And I always felt that without a huge agenda, when I was writing Bert & Ernie, they were. I didn’t have any other way to contextualize them. The other thing was, more than one person referred to Arnie & I as “Bert & Ernie.”

That’s telling.

Yeah, I was Ernie. I look more Bert-ish. And Arnie as a film editor—if you thought of Bert with a job in the world, wouldn’t that be perfect? Bert with his paper clips and organization? And I was the jokester. So it was the Bert & Ernie relationship, and I was already with Arnie when I came to Sesame Street. So I don’t think I’d know how else to write them, but as a loving couple. I wrote sketches…Arnie’s OCD would create friction with how chaotic I was. And that’s the Bert & Ernie dynamic.

So you’re saying that Bert & Ernie became analogs for your relationship in a lot of ways?

Yeah. Because how else? That’s what I had in my life, a Bert & Ernie relationship. How could it not permeate? The things that would tick off Arnie would be the things that would tick off Bert. How could it not? I will say that I would never have said to the head writer, “oh, I’m writing this, this is my partner and me.” But those two, Snuffalupagus, because he’s the sort of clinically depressed Muppet…you had characters that appealed to a gay audience. And Snuffy, this depressed person nobody can see, that’s sort of Kafka! It’s sort of gay closeted too.

Okay so let’s break down these quotes here.

Mark states that “And I always felt that without a huge agenda, when I was writing Bert & Ernie, they were. I didn’t have any other way to contextualize them. The other thing was, more than one person referred to Arnie & I as “Bert & Ernie.”

For Mark writing for the two characters came from the idea of his relationship with his long time partner. It was the only way he could write the characters, and this was because this was how he viewed them as a gay man in a long term relationship. Other writers, such as Jim and Frank, did not see them as such and wrote them as the Odd couple, and still other writers later on saw them as cousins and wrote them as siblings since they had that sort of dynamic with their own sibling.

“So it was the Bert & Ernie relationship, and I was already with Arnie when I came to Sesame Street. So I don’t think I’d know how else to write them, but as a loving couple. I wrote sketches…Arnie’s OCD would create friction with how chaotic I was. And that’s the Bert & Ernie dynamic.”

This is another important line here. Mark came in already in a relationship and saw that relationship with the two characters. This matches with another writer who, as a female, said that their dynamic reminds her of her and her sister and that to her she is Ernie and her younger sister is Bert. So that’s how she writes them. Mark wrote them as he saw himself and his partner.

“Yeah. Because how else? That’s what I had in my life, a Bert & Ernie relationship. How could it not permeate? The things that would tick off Arnie would be the things that would tick off Bert. How could it not? I will say that I would never have said to the head writer, “oh, I’m writing this, this is my partner and me.”

Another point here. Because Sesame Street is designed to talk to kids, and the Muppets are more or less children in a lot of cases (save for the What nots that play bit parts or if they need to have a job) and Ernie and Bert fall into that category. Of course you would never bring this up to the head writer because neither character is seen as an adult. Both Ernie and Bert are kids, and seen as kids by the cast and crew. Only a hand full of Muppets have actual ages, such as Big Bird, Elmo, Zoey, Telly, Abby, and Prairie Dawn, others like Oscar, Cookie Monster, Harry Monster, Grover, etc. have no known age but play out in skits doing jobs or pretending to do things, like kids do.

So at this point Mark is writing the character as he saw them, but wasn’t about to say “Well this is how they are” because you want the kids to decide who and what the Muppets are. The idea is to get the children to connect to them, that’s why there is never anything specified about the character.

“Well what about Sesame Street’s not being inclusive.”

FALSE: While yes there hasn’t yet been an openly gay couple on the show, Sesame Street Workshop and the Henson company has had a number of performers that were gay. Mark Mentions Richard Hunt and Judy Freudberg, Kevin Clash –Elmo and Cliff, and others that are now working on the show. The thing is sexuality is something that they have to work against in some cases, and what I mean by that is the idea of sexuality as a whole not the idea of who you want to date and such. There was an incident not too long ago that Katie Perry’s sketch with Elmo (whom she apparently adores) had to be pulled from the show because her dress on top was seen as too reveling, even though it was an outfit to make her look like she was going to play dress up with Elmo. It’s common for the actors who come on the show to be asked who their favorite Muppet is and they try to work on a scene with them and the Muppet.

“Why can’t there be an openly gay couple on the show?”

FACT: There are probably several reasons that there hasn’t been, as of yet. A few newer, and a few that are older. So for Sesame Street to work, the show has to adhere to the guidelines set by the Education Department of the country where they are at. This means that’s their top priority on teaching and educating kids about the fundamentals.  Another factor that comes into play here is the fact that right now they are funded not just by PBS (where donations are sent in to fund the show and the actors and the sets), but also through merchandising and, more importantly right now, Sponsorship with HBO, who tends to like to cut the cost of things for them.

As of right now they have introduced Julie a girl with Autism, and previously they managed to cover death (Mr. Hooper) and divorce. Also Linda is deaf and did teach ASL for a long while on the show until I think she retired. Because the focus of the show is children, the idea of a gay couple would have to be brought in through how a child would be introduced to it. And that would be a new family moving into the neighborhood.

If they do bring on a gay couple there are two options there. Either live actors, who probably would be gay in real life and would talk about things, with their child (either adopted or biological depending on the story they want to tell) or they would have a puppet that has parents that are gay. The more likely reality is that they probably will go with the live action actors because it would make more sense and fit in better. If they go with puppets then they will be What nots and probably the focus will be more on the kid –as it normally is.

See how they brought in Julie (Julia?) regarding her and her autism.

“So why won’t Frank Oz agree that Bert and Ernie are gay?”

FACT: Because to Frank, Ernie is Jim and Jim was his best friend. He can only see Bert as Bert, or himself or the character that is based around himself.(Regarding the comments by Frank you can see them Here from the Huffington post, or Here from NBC News)

“It seems Mr. Mark Saltzman was asked if Bert & Ernie are gay. It's fine that he feels they are. They're not, of course," Oz wrote in a tweet. "But why that question? Does it really matter? Why the need to define people as only gay? There's much more to a human being than just straightness or gayness."

"When a character is created to be queer it is indeed important that the character be known as such. It is also important when a character who was not created queer, be accepted as such," Oz wrote.”

This is an important statement because this is from the man who helped create this show from the ground up. I would take his word as the creator of the character and the originator about who these two characters are and their relationship, since, ya know, he created them.

“But the Muppets have parents and romances in their other shows!”

TRUE and FALSE: The Muppets were first created as an adult series as part of commercials and late night tv talk shows. For a while they were on SNL until John Belushi indicated he would walk if they didn’t get rid of them. Fast forward a few years to the Muppet Show, which was based on the then popular varity show. The whole point of the show was sketch comedy, with the back stage that you didn’t regually get to see. So the Muppets themselves are adult characters with adult storylines that you can tell (not lewd stuff).

However, Sesame street is not, nor has it ever been, an adult show. Yes there are nods to adult things, like songs that have more mature themes, but for the most part it’s based around children and their needs for learning. This means the majority of Muppets here are children and have child like views of things. Even if a person does an adult joke around them outside of their show, they don’t get it because they are supposed to be kids.

The difference is that Piggy and Kermit can make a sex joke if need be, Big bird and Oscar can’t.

As for the romance, well given that Piggy pretty much was a stalker that caused Kermit issues, yeah one can say it’s not the most healthy of relationships. (Although personally I ship them and love them to death because they are awesome.) 

Also regarding the parents that show up in Sesame Street. Most of the parents were the Adults that were there already and got married and had kids over the years. The Muppets for years did not have any parents, until like the late 90s into the 2000s. Or you never saw them, or maybe only saw them once in a blue moon. Even now the parents aren’t the point of the show, it’s the kids and how they interact with one another.

“What about their statement…”

FACT: There’s really nothing wrong with it since they are just going over part of their mission statement here. As I said before, the point of the series is to focus on kids and their interaction and education. The only time that kids would probably be dealing with sexuality in this sense would be if they met someone’s parents that are gay, or their teacher has a girl friend or boyfriend. That’s about it.

If any series would have been the better place to talk about these matters that would be Mr. Rogers and his show as that was more about the people you meet and connect with, rather than education and learning.

So please people take some time to read the actual article and also the comments from the Workshop and the creator Frank Oz, before you go lambasting them.

[comicteaparty]

August 16th, 2018 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party chat that occurred on August 16th, 2018, from 5PM - 7PM PDT.  The chat focused on Raison d'Etre by Cloud Fourteen (Funari and Leigh).

Featured Comment:

Chat:

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

COMIC TEA PARTY START!

Good day everyone~! This week’s Comic Tea Party is now officially beginning~! Today we are discussing Raison d'Etre by Cloud Fourteen (Funari and Leigh)~! (http://raisondetrecomic.tumblr.com/) For those new or in need of a reminder, discussions about the comic are freeform, so please feel free to bring up whatever you wish. However, every 30 minutes I will be dropping in a discussion question to help those who would like a prompt. These questions are totally OPTIONAL to answer, and you can pay them no mind if you wish. If you miss out on any though, they’ll be pinned for the duration of the chat once they’re posted~! Remember, constructive criticism is allowed, but the primary focus here is to have fun and appreciate the amazing comics that the community makes~! All that being said, let’s get started and have a great discussion!

QUESTION 1. What is your favorite scene in the comic so far and why?

snuffysam

my favorite scene is the scene where inada gives yukina the journals, but only on a second reading. "hey tante, can you help me research-" "what's that? you wanted my sister's diary? you wanted my big sister's deepest, darkest secrets? you wanted to learn the most intimate details of your mothers' lives? that's what you wanted?"

Funari

Mueheheh~ Yeah, we love putting in stuff like that. Seemingly innocent comment at first, but during a reread? BONUS!

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

in the retrospect i can only suspect inada was saving them for blackmail O_O

Funari

Little siblings...they can be such brats ;P

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

lets see, lets see. i think my favorite scene is when yukina is in the shadow place because i really like the tension of shit hitting the fan, the visuals, and then the comedic end where yukina and rie just wind up in a pile.

Funari

Ah, yes. Chapter 5 was when Leigh started putting in her two cents more into the story. I don't recall who came up with the exact direction there BUT that was a good one. It kinda encompasses Raison's story style as a whole - can get serious but then it has its comedic moments just kinda "whoop!" right back

A roller coaster of emotions

snuffysam

i really like that comedic aspect too

like in the story being told about miko and sachiko rescuing nozomi

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

I'm pretty bad for being able to figure out relationships unless they're spelled out in black and white myself. Even the big reveal of "Kaa-san", I don't remember how long it took until I clued in to there being two mothers.

snuffysam

i think "oh, she's their daughter" was the first thing i thought of, but the way the characters' talked threw me off

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

LOL. i guess thats fair though. not sure how much anime you watch cause if you dont watch anime, yeah, kaa-san would probably just go right over.

Funari

Leigh: The "rescuing Nozomi" story was one of the first stories I was asked to help with back in Part 1. I've looked forward to that scene finally playing out, and was not disappointed!(edited)

snuffysam

i like how japanese mom is kaa-san and french mom is maman lol(edited)

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

My favourite scene was actually pretty early on. It was when Kregor was going after Sachiko saying something to the effect of "this should be easy" only to have Miko disarm his dagger and get into a whole fight.

Funari

Leigh: Made life a little easier as far as trying to write for these idiots ;p(edited)

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

In a sense it helped set up his other flailed attempts.

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

another scene that i really liked was when yukina learned about the ascendent and decided that perhaps she should stop hiding and all that. i feel that was portrayed in a powerful direct effect of reading the journal.

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

(Yes, I meant flailed not failed.)

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

any scene with kregor is a classic because kregor is that right mix of overconfident and screw up

Funari

Poor Kregor~

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Rebel: I watch anime. I got the reference, I didn't put two and two together that Miko and Sachi were married.

Funari

Leigh: I'm working on a page with Kregor at this very moment. So he's not going anywhere soon!(edited)

snuffysam

it's the first thing we learn about them math!

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Snuffy: I did think that was clever about the two language mothers.

I have the mind of a goldfish!

Rebel: Yeah, that whole ascendent thing was good. I liked the side story of her with her mother too.

snuffysam

"eh, i just sort of forgot about this canon f/f ship" - math, 2018

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

We were in the future though!

Funari

A little something from Maman, and a little something from Kaa-san ;p

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

I'm used to seeing them younger and courting.

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Hello!

snuffysam

hey sj!

Funari

Hello there :3

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

(I'll be a bit in-and-out with my 2 month old, btw.)

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

hey sj~!

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

I see you're one of the creative talents responsible for this comic, @Funari

Really nice efforts ya got here!

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

well the important part, math, is that you figured it out eventually and saw that those ship sails moved at full force.

Funari

Thank you :3 I created the universe and the basic plot and some of the cast. Leigh created the other half of the cast and has helped string the plot together a bit better since chapter 5 :3

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Ah okies!

Always appreciate a good team effort.

Also was not expecting that four year timeskip

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

yeah i have to say the timeskip surprised me too. not that it was unwelcome, mind you, just something that made me go legasp

Funari

I don't think anyone was, according to folks over at the c14 server or anyone who's commented to us besides one friend lol

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

lol

Funari

Ever since Leigh started contributing more, it made twists even more likely. Sometimes she'll suggest an idea and smirk at me from across the room and...oh boy.. xD

snuffysam

yeah i was figuring part 2 would begin with the gang immediately going to rescue them but nope

it was a cool twist!

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

lol XD

AV-chan

Hi, just dropped by to join the Raison discussion party here Favorite scenes? I think it's mostly the ones with Miko and Sachiko especially when they were in their teens

Funari

Leigh: smirks

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Also just wanted to say this is a really good suit https://78.media.tumblr.com/ea04508234ff49e7d6b78458cef47714/tumblr_inline_nal653HGRk1r87x2y.png

Funari

Hey AV! :3

snuffysam

but yeah @AV-chan , i absolutely agree

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Hello AV!

snuffysam

seeing miko and sachiko interact as teens is just the best

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

welcome @AV-chan ~! thank you for coming!

AV-chan

Hiya everyone

snuffysam

they're so perfect together!

AV-chan

I know right, it's just so cute seeing them get together

Funari

Leigh: I do love a woman in uniform @Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

miko and sachiko have a really nice and fluffy relationship so seeing them together is a happy thing :3

Funari

Awwww

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Women in univerm are always so awesome

especially the battle-ready ones

Funari

Leigh: Heheh~ YES! Sword Wife!

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

A good sword wife

AV-chan

Totally

Funari

It personally makes me gush that you guys love the SachiMiko interactions x3

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Sweet to hear~

AV-chan

Maybe soon with Yucchan too but that's probably not gonna happen any time soon I think

Funari

Leigh: Smirks

snuffysam

i seem to recall on some page where yukina's mom (not sure which) called to her from off-screen, there was an author comment that went something like "i have no idea what her parents' designs will be lol"

that was a nice touch

Funari

laughs

AV-chan

I think it's mostly cause how I somehow witness the development and changes to your OCs Funari that makes me very interested in them as well

snuffysam

though to be fair, we hadn't seen what miko and sachiko looked like as adults yet, so that wasn't necessarily a lie

Funari

Leigh: I knew that Nari had been hanging with me for too long when that popped up!

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Oh yeah, then it was a hat hiding things. Was that an accident?

Like, saying that?

Funari

That's the point! @snuffysam xD

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

speaking of designs tho, i really do like the adult designs for them. especially how sachiko has this sort of grizzled look now cause of the eyepatch

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

https://78.media.tumblr.com/bc036315fd6b663afa1ffaffa11a5e89/tumblr_p9i9zvvI3w1tzfltho1_1280.png Wow, the future sure looks... different.

Funari

Don't quite get what you mean there @MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑 Just want to be sure I know what you're talking about before I answer

AV-chan

A traditional house in the future?

snuffysam

people have traditional houses today, don't they?

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

QUESTION 2. Throughout the comic, we continually see the appearance of Kregor who is out to cause a lot of harm at the behest of his boss, Lady Elianne. What do you think is so special about Sachiko’s blood? Does it have something to do with Allie or is something else afoot? Why do you think Lady Elianne targets Sachiko specifically and not anyone else in her family? Do you think Lady Elianne will ultimately succeed, or will everyone be able to stop her? Who even is Lady Elianne? Outside of Sachiko, Kregor also hunts Yukina’s friend Rie at the behest of the Tanuki Brothers. Do you think the initial failure will deter Kregor from trying again? If Kregor doesn’t try again, do you believe the Tanuki Brothers will leave Rie alone? If Kregor does try again, will he succeed or will something else stop him?

Funari

Stuff has happened to both between their teenaged years and when they're moms. Meta-wise, we're also not fans of works where adult forms of characters almost look exactly the same as the young forms but with smaller eyes or the like

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Yes, we do

snuffysam

it's clear that there's something important about the nakamura bloodline

Funari

The idea behind the Miyamotos' house is that was to hammer down the idea that they were pretty traditional. At least since Nozomi got married.

(and there are still traditional homes in Japan today ;P )

AV-chan

Ooh that's true

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

aah, alright X3

snuffysam

plenty of houses that are around today were built centuries ago, and plenty of modern houses try to imitate houses from centuries ago

AV-chan

That part with Sachiko being hunted has always piqued my curiosity in a way, like what's gonna happen next

Funari

Oh and my reaction to Question 2? ohhhhh that's pretty much what Part 2 is all about! So I'll just keep myself "quiet"

snuffysam

well we know what did happen next

Funari

And Leigh is saying she's just gonna keep smirking, so not much input from her either lol

snuffysam

lost her depth perception, for one

gained a shadow friend

Funari

True, very true...for the depth perception bit

Shadow friend? Ohhhhhh that happened sooner in her life

AV-chan

An interesting twist there

snuffysam

i mean "next" being after the latest journal entry that yucchan read

i don't think we've seen allie in any journal entries so far?

Funari

Nope, not in journals, though there is a Special comic that shows a specific moment in Sachiko's life relating to that

https://imgur.com/a/Q4J7v

snuffysam

i bet everyone is super jealous of yucchan's three moms

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

"How do you even get three mommies?"

snuffysam

japanese mom, french mom, and shadow mom

Funari

Leigh: Hey, I'M jealous of her moms!

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

so in respects to the question, i recall elianne referring to the thing as a curse and how its killed her ancestors. but im starting to wonder if its not something on her mother's side but something on her father's side. because nobody on her mother's side seems at all bothered by any sort of curse and what not and it fits why kregor is targetting sachiko and not say her brother.

AV-chan

That's an interesting way to put it

I forgot if Sachiko's brother had a different dad

snuffysam

he did

Funari

He does!

Also BOOM! Good catch, @✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨ !

AV-chan

Ah that most likely it

Funari

Hayato was born through Rin's marriage with Japanese businessman Daichi Nakamura. Sachiko was....well, by all means, an illegitimate child from a guy in France that Rin knew

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Back, sorry @Funari ; I think what I was wondering was were Yukinas parents always decided from the start, and it was how they looked in the future that gave rise to the hat, or was the scene with her parents evolving as that scene began.

Funari

@MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑 Yukina was always intended to be Sachiko and Miko's kid. Her meta-conception was pretty much that basic idea

But, ahem, yeah. Something's going on with Sachiko's paternal blood that's related to Elianne. Some big stuff

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Oh yeah, Sachiko's dad is actually the head of some other huge NKP department or something... that's probably the reason the hit was put out on her?

Funari

The Rin (Favreau) side of things is mostly just "Oh, this family is one of the famous clans in the NKP!"

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

i wonder if sachiko's dad knew about this so-called curse?

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Lady Elianne is Sachiko's step-mom.

Don't want her getting the inheritance.

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

oh no the mom count increases to four now

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Mum's the word.

snuffysam

what's with men not telling their partners about their bloodline stuff lol

Funari

That was Leigh. This is what I put up with when she inks pages

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Hah! That's funny. Nice heart for penache.

AV-chan

Haha

Funari

Also, Math, you are NOT the only one who has mentioned a theory that Elianne is related to Sachiko like that

I can't say yes or no though

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

it seems plausible given elianne keeps saying the blood belongs to her. and thats usually something ppl say when theyre blood-related

and theyre evil that is

snuffysam

that's also the sort of thing you say if you're evil and want blood

like in general

AV-chan

Inb4 something like Elianne is the mother of Sachiko's dad

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Or they're vampires.

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

or both

elianne is sachiko's vampire granny

AV-chan

Yeah

Funari

Leigh: Isn't that the usual plot twist nowadays?

AV-chan

It's still a good twist

Funari

Elianne is....SOMETHING!

Leigh: She's a real piece of work. A real PAIN IN THE PATELLA

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

I wonder

Doesn't anyone else in the roster have badass suits?

AV-chan

Wanna see Yukina in that suit soon

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Speaking of Kregor - does the guy have good lawyers, or what? He keeps getting banished to be tried for his crimes, and he keeps getting off... sometimes even portaling away before he can be banished. Who is paying his legal fees?(edited)

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

it is a nice suit

Funari

The most we got right now is this

AV-chan

Elianne maybe?

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

elianne of course

assuming she doesnt just bust him out of jail by other means

Funari

It's Elianne :P

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

She's a rules lawyer too then.

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

speaking of kregor though, i do wonder for real if rie is still in danger. cause didnt kregor already get paid?

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

"You didn't inflect properly, so my client goes free."

AV-chan

That long hair... Yukina grew her hair?

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

its bad assassin form to take the money and not finish the job

Funari

Rie is out of danger

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

dat suit

I'll take it

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Rie's mom might still pay a ransom.

Funari

Elianne has been working on something that's far more significant than the Rie thing and when Kregor told her he missed and hit Sachiko and Miko instead with her spell, she was like "Oh. OH. NEVER MIND ABOUT THE TANUKIS."

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

"Ship... out of danger?" "You saved the ship." "The needs of the many..."

Funari

Kregor would do anything for Elianne by the way

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

He would do anything for love. But he won't do that.

AV-chan

That thing huh

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

That thing with the strawberries.

Funari

Also, Nozomi is on HIGH ALERT for Kregor to show up, so even if he tried to finish the deed, he's not gonna

Nozomi...is a tough little firecracker

With a crossbow

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Lol

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

i feel like this is gonna put them on the tanuki's shit list though then? cause id be pretty mad if i paid an assassin and then they were like "sorry bro my lady says we got better shit to do peace out."

Funari

Leigh: Tanuki vs Elianne. Round 1 (ding)

snuffysam

no refunds!

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

FIGHT!

Funari

Leigh: No, for real, they're welcome to try it

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

true i dont imagine theyre actually a threat XD

but they could at least go around spreading ill founded gossip

the horror

QUESTION 3. Chapter 6 of the comic is a four year time skip after Lady Elianne inadvertently captures Sachiko and Koyomiko. What do you think Yukina has been doing for the four years? Has she been in France the whole time, or do you think she came back to Japan at some point? How do you think Yukina has been coping with her missing mothers, and what do you think she intends to do about it? In regards to other characters, how do you think they’re doing? Is Rie okay, or has something happened because of her grandmother’s heir? Do you think Rie’s mother is doing okay as captain, and what do you think the state of her marriage is? Are Sachiko and Koyomiko alive still, and if so, why haven’t they escaped? What, in general, do you think is going to happen now?

snuffysam

they'll hit lady elianne where it hurts - her wallet. leave a bad review, and nobody will hire her again.

Funari

As I read this question out to Leigh, she got this HUGE smile on her face

I think she likes this question :P

snuffysam

and yeah i think things aren't looking great for nozomi. a guy kidnapped her best friends in an attempted kidnapping of her daughter, all because her husband didn't tell her anything

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Probably stayed in France for two years then came back to Japan the final two

Just having a four year-long vacation

Funari

An interesting theory

Also @snuffysam - If that all happened to me, I'd be pretty angry and stressed out, that's for sure!

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

And that's why you need a vacation

to get all that stress off ya

and plot your comeback

Funari

Nozomi needs a vacation like no one's business

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Yes

Funari

Considering what we know of Nozomi's personality, and that the Captain in the NKP is the leader of the whole group...

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

i think it largely depends on whats happening too. if its business as usual i think nozomi would be fine, but if crime shot up or something thatd be a diff story. albeit im sure stressed. especially if on the side shes been trying to inquire where sachiko and miko be at. and losing all the sleep. also wondering when rie's destiny will come knocking at the door

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Perhaps

Funari

We plan to do a special comic about Rie's grandmother finally showing up

Because Rie turned 18 within the 4 year timeskip

snuffysam

oh snap

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Oh snap!

Double Snap

snuffysam

hey total non-sequiter. how old was rin when she married mr. nakamura?

no wait i did the math on hayato's birth year totally wrong. ignore me.

Funari

Oh, okay xD

I was about to pull up my notes

But it's cool :P

snuffysam

np np

Funari

Oh by the way, I DID actually cover this question in a way. Theorize :P

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Oh my god

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

old enough to marry, but not old enough to recognize a potentially bad partner when she sees it

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

That looks really nice

And lol

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

ah sweet the cat thing whose name i forgot found a friend

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

I’d talk about what I would do if I found out that my partner was less then desirable but this isn’t life tea party so

snuffysam

he already had one though ):

Funari

Do not forget about Miko and Sachiko D: His first friends/family

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Oh...

snuffysam

yeah, exactly

Funari

And, as we can see in the drawing, yes, Nozomi is stressing hard during the past 4 years

snuffysam

he had a friend

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

well okay, cat thing found a new friend. to combat the lonliness but probably more likely to get in elianne's way.

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

I wonder, what if the timeskip was only one year

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

i really wanna know why elianne specifically referred to the cat as a renegade

Funari

Leigh: Well, he's done it once. What's not to say he'll do it again?

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

the timeskip wasnt only one year tho?

Funari

Koneko the Renegade~

snuffysam

well, this may come as a shock - but i don't believe koneko was born on earth

Funari

Or, if you've read the most recent pages, Ozadarr :P

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

Koneko is the real hero of the story

snuffysam

and we don't know how old he is at that. it's possible he's been a thorn in elianne's side since before miko was born

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

that is the impression i got

that theres tons of past history here

and koneko is a sneaky sneak

Funari

Leigh: No one really knows how old Koneko is. Except us, of course

Funari

Koneko is very much a sneaky sneak!

And even besides the Elianne thing, consider that Koneko looked exactly the same between the 2000s-era journal flashbacks and Yucchan's present time...Red flags

snuffysam

plenty of cats look the same across, like, 30 years

not weird at all

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Mmmm

Very sneaky~

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

but speaking of not koneko, im gonna be optimistic and assume sachiko and miko are alive and just being held prisoner. since elianne cant do the evil without memories or something apparently. meanwhile koneko fled to mexico or canada. O_O cause thats where all the criminals in popculture flee.

Funari

Those memories....they're pretty important

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

4 years of prison.

Sounds like hell

snuffysam

i don't think koneko's running away so much as looking for help

and hey, at least they have each other?

Funari

4 years of prison while suffering from amnesia!

Just imagine looking to the side, and there's another beautiful woman and you have NO idea who they are, and they're giving you that same look

snuffysam

at least when they get out they'll know for sure that love at first sight is a real thing?

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

elianne is at least being nice if she puts them in a cell or something together.

Funari

Leigh: I like that remark! @snuffysam

They're in exactly the same place you saw them in the Interlude

So...sort of a prison?

Not the bars and concrete kind, but they're trapped in that weird bubble in a strange dimension (though the beginning of ch 6 mentions what it is in slightly more detail as a passing comment...)

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

QUESTION 4. By Yukina’s time period, Sachiko and Koyomiko are pretty legendary. What do you think happened in the past that earned them such notoriety? Is it something to do with catching Kregor, Koyomiko’s Ascendant Rights work, or just everything put together? Speaking of the past, do you think Koyomiko repaired the relationship with her family at some point? We also see a brief flashback of how Sachiko lost her eye, so what do you think are the circumstances that brought that about? Aside from the past, do you think reading the journals about Sachiko and Koyomiko has helped Yukina in ways besides offering her a new perspective on them? Do you believe they will help Yukina find her raison?

snuffysam

"And for almost catching Kregor for good no less than sixty times, we give the medal of bravery to Sachiko and Koyomiko!"

Funari

The Kregor Katcher Award

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

(A half hour of crying baby later... )

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

poor baby :<

Funari

:<

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Regards the prior question, obviously the reason Sachiko and Miko haven't escaped yet is because they don't have their memories and don't know where to escape to. It's a fun Catch-22, because if they had their memories, they'd be put to death.

(Baby's had a bottle now. No, not the weird one, the other one. And not with the cold formula, the other stuff.)

Funari

Leigh: Right on the money

Leigh: There's a few more complexities involved, but that's the gist of it

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

That kinda seemed obvious to me.

(Am I making up for not realizing who the mothers were?)

Funari

Leigh: It wasn't supposed to be particularly hidden lol

Leigh: You're forgiven. For now

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

it was pretty obvious but ya never know when someone might have an interesting theory

like elianne gave them part time work and theyre like "sweet this pays way more than min wage"

Funari

Yeah, no that makes perfect sense. But, in this case, we weren't trying to hide anything extra there

We'll be adding more details in the next few updates actually

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Seconding Rebel

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Also regards the prior question, I feel like Yukina's been trying to train herself in France so as to (1) Not ask stupid questions like what's going on when in the middle of a tense situation, and (2) Learn from Cassandra about what to do to avoid flipping out after freezing at the end of said tense situation.

Funari

Thank you for remembering that Cassandra exists :3

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

LOVE the Cassandra angle. Gotta go to her for Ascendant issues.

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

i was wondering if we were gonna see cassandra again

Funari

VERY soon

snuffysam

i wonder if Yukina'll meet up with her grandfather?

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

I mean, she could be in Scotland, but she did speak French. shrugs

Funari

We're both very fond of Cassie

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Training during a break seems like a good idea. Especially for four years

Never skipping leg day either

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

As to the NEW question, perhaps they're legendary for their looooove. It was even pointed out how everyone in school knew back then.

Funari

Cassandra's well-traveled. She knows French, German, and a bit of Japanese thanks to having Miko as a very close friend

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

omg math. that would actually be hilarious if true. theyre legendary because no matter the trial their love was unconquered

Funari

WELL, in a personal sense, that may be true!

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Does Yuzu + Miko = Suzaku no Miko? (hashtag Fushigi Yugi...)

Funari

Leigh: Certainly, when everyone who was at their wedding remembers them for their bond!

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Rebel: True love did kind of conquor that darkness spell that hit Sachiko.

(I mean, it wasn't a kiss, but still... we can imagine that...)

Funari

heheh

Their love is pretty darn important!

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Actually, maybe Sachiko's already conquered her evil step-mom? Could be someone other than Elianne, maybe that was the big deal.

Losing the eye was probably a prophecy... darn those prophecies...

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Never underestimate it

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

i am curious why sachiko didnt seem to block kregor in that flashback. like theres a point id think shed stop freezing up with fear, but maybe it was not at that time i guess

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Actually, kind of interesting that in 2031 they don't have a prosthetic for that. Unless Sachiko wears the eyepatch as a badge of honour.

Funari

It was an incident related to Elianne. No prophecies this time, just some crazy stuff.

Sachiko definitely has a problem with freezing up

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Rebel: Maybe Miko was behind her.

Funari

The wound isn't natural

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

hmm thats interesting it isnt natural

which makes me think man, that must of hurt even more

Funari

But yeah, deep down, Sachiko would prefer to solve things without violence. Miko's the more violent-prone one

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

As to Miko's family... I kinda doubt it? The way she referred to her mom and everything back then? The ascendancy stuff becoming mainstream might have helped, but I kinda doubt it.

Funari

Conferring with Leigh and

Eh, may as well just say it

No

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

The wound isn't natural... it's artificial. Sachiko's been a clone this whole time.

Gotcha. Probably why Miko wants to do things better with her family though.

Funari

Miko's mom's attitude never changed, so Miko never made up with her. Even Tomoko eventually moved away from her, though she still has a sort-of connection there. Sort of

Oh yeah. That's how she reacted to the abuse. It helped that she had folks like Sachiko and Rin around to show her what family can be like, and her dad WAS an okay man, but he was married to....that. She always wanted to be better than her mom

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Actually, if anyone's a clone, it's probably Kregor. Explains why he was vanquished 60 times.

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

I man, how many people stride to be better than their parents? Just curious

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

haha i suspected. making up with ppl is difficult if it can be done at all in those cases.

you cant clone kregor

kregor is one of a kind

O_O

Funari

Leigh: personal experience

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Hmmm, if Miko had both Sachiko and a clone of Sachiko to spend time with at once...

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

math plz

theres already a threesome with allie in the mix

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Always room for one more.

One for the shadows, one for the daytime.

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

A foursome?

Sign me up

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

anyway, idk if the journals helped yukina find a raison or purpose, but im sure her moms getting kidnapped certainly helped

Funari

(was trying to make this quick. It DOES seem like Kregor's got fans!)

snuffysam

"gee yukina, how come you get to have FOUR moms whenmmmmghg-" gets kidnapped by kitsune grandma

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Oooh, title drop. (Yeah, I was surprised that with all the French nods, Funari's not part French that I can tell...)

Funari

omg

Leigh: I think Rie would say that one mom is plenty, giving who HER mom is!

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Kregor's the villain you love to hate.

Funari

And in regards to @✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨ - we're definitely moving towards a moment of recknoning for Yucchan

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

So here's a question I wanted to ask before we run out of time -- have we seen Pan in the future?

Did I just miss it?

Funari

Not yet

She's in the little "How things have changed" drawing, and there are plans, but officially not yet

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Ooooh, hmmmm. As long as she didn't turn to the dark side.

Funari

No, we can confidently confirm that Pan is still on our side ;p

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Lol

What about the light side

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Mr & Mrs Daggers?

Funari

fjfjgjfj

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

i have wondered where pan has been too. i think from the time skip im most interested in seeing what rie's dad is up too given for all i know nozomi kicked his butt out onto the street into the gutter(edited)

snuffysam

good

Funari

OOF

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Okay since we're running out of time here I just wanted to say good luck on the rest of the comic and hope it all goes well, there's some seriously good reads hidden in there.

Funari

Thanks much :3

Any other quick questions?

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Yeah, funny thing is, I can kind of see why he'd bow to the pressure of not telling his wife about Rie. The thing I don't get is him not telling about who he was before the marriage, that's the weird transgression to me.

Funari

Leigh and I have certainly had lots of fun tonight! Glad you all have enjoyed what we've done so far!

Leigh: Mmmhmm (too secretive for his own good)

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Does "Cat" have a human form too?

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

You're welcome!(edited)

Funari

TECHNICALLY yes

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Hashtag catgirls?

(Or catboys, whatever.)

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Funari

Catpeople

But yes, technically he does, but we won't see it any time soon. There are Reasons

raisons

Elianne's gonna do a huge exposition dump in the next few pages

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Cassandra's mother was secretly a catgirl.

Funari

She is...preparing for it

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Anyway, good job! It'll be interesting to see what happens as comic looks at other planes, as seems to be happening in the new pages.(edited)

(Or just people from other planes hiding out in ours.)

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

COMIC TEA PARTY END!

Unfortunately, the scheduled Comic Tea Party time is now up~! Thank you everyone so much for reading and joining this week’s chat~! We want to give a special thank you to Cloud Fourteen (Funari and Leigh), as well, for making Raison d'Etre and volunteering it for our reading queue. If you liked the comic, please be sure to support Cloud Fourteen (Funari and Leigh)’s efforts however you’re able to. All that being said, if you would like to continue discussing this week’s comic, we highly encourage you to do so~!

For next week, Comic Tea Party will focus on Pathways: Chronicles of Tuvana by Elaine Tipping. As always, please use the next several days to read as much of the comic as you would like. We hope to see you next Thursday on August 23rd from 5PM to 7PM PDT for the chat~! Until then, happy reading~! Comic: http://pathways.smackjeeves.com/