#the theme now is christmas but i didn’t feel like changing my navigation

[bluesidez]

Hi! Are you really a lab tech?? 👉🏽👈🏽

No, I am not and I know nothing about the actual medical field 😭. I am just owner of the Love Lab, where all of my Miguel O’Hara (and fav characters) fantasies come true. All fictional.

The hardest things I’ve done are learn Chinese and cut my sweet treat intake.

[eirist]

A Taste of Christmas

LET IT SNOW

Disclaimer: One Piece (and its characters) belongs to Eiichiro Oda-sensei.

Reminder: I have no beta-reader. Any grammatical and spelling errors are solely mine.

Warning: OOC possible. One shot.

Rating: T

Note: Prompt # 13 – Fallen Snow

ZoNa Holiday 2024 event is currently happening at @zonamievents in Tumblr! We have different themes/prompts for every day of December. Kindly check it and you can share any of your ZoNa works so we can all enjoy them!

This was a late entry. And the only one I finished writing while drinking my post-Christmas dinner hot chocolate. Since it’s near done, I thought I better wrap this up even if there is a different prompt for today. I’m working on it and some other drafts as well. I hope I get to post them in the next few days.

Anyway, MERRY CHRISTMAS everyone!!!

Summary: He had hoped against hope that she wouldn’t catch on that easily as he tried to figure out what was the cause of this incessant urge to spend most of his waking time with her.

“Hey.”

Zoro cracked an eye open at the sound of her voice. Nami was peering down at him with a curious look on her face. Her cheeks were flushed from the cold but the pink winter coat she had on only deepened the hue and made her looked like she was deeply blushing.

He blinked up at her in a mixture of wonder and awe. She looks… nice.

Her expression suddenly changed—her brows furrowing and forehead scrunching. In the midst of thinking about the way she looks right now, Zoro realized that she was asking him a question.

“Huh?” He managed to sound out and fought the urge to wince. Why did his respond sounded like he was a dud?

There was a sharp intake of breath followed by a disapproving look as Nami repeated her question.

“I asked what the hell are you doing sleeping out here in the cold?”

Oh. So that was it.

Zoro glanced groggily at his surroundings. He was on the lawn deck, leaning against the railing of the Sunny—one of his favorite spots to nap. He opened his mouth and yawned, taking his sweet time as Nami stared down at him with eyes narrowing by the second.

He brought a hand up to scratch his head and realized they were a bit stiff and cold from being exposed without protection while he was dozing off. He did don a coat and some proper winter clothes but opted out any head gear or gloves.

To his defense it wasn’t this chilly earlier when he first situated himself here. He wasn’t really expecting the weather to take a turn while he was resting. He was thinking it’s gonna happen much, much later.

In front of him, Nami rolled her eyes at his idiocy. She made a tch-ing sound on her mouth before crouching down in front of him and grabbing his hand.

“I swear Zoro, you’re gonna turn your ass into an icicle before the day ends.” She chastised him as she pulled something out of her coat’s pocket. He didn’t bother retorting or pulling away. He was feeling too lazy to protest.

Plus Nami’s gloved hands were warm and feels good as she randomly squeezed his in an attempt to chase the coldness on them away.

“Here.” She placed the gloves on his upturned palm. “Aren’t you listening when I said that the weather will turn colder around this time? It’ll most likely snow today.” There was that frown again marring her pretty face.

“Hnn…”

He didn’t bother affirming that he was, indeed, not listening to her. It would start an argument with her and it was too cold for that. Instead, he dutifully tucked his hands in the gloves she’d given him.

Zoro wasn’t really in the mood to be obstinate with her. She did bring it for him and he wasn’t about to let her effort be wasted. Plus, it was a nice gesture—a really nice and rare gesture coming from the navigator.

He could only hope, she’s not charging him for this.

She was silently watching him, somehow amazed that he wasn’t arguing with her about this.

A sigh escaped her. “What will you do without me?” She asked.

The corner of his lips quirked up. “Turn into an icicle, probably.”

Nami looked surprised at his answer. And she burst out laughing.

The swordsman smirked at the sound.

“Now can I go back to sleep?” He drawled, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning back against the Sunny’s railing.  

She rolled her eyes at him. “Fine.” She stood up and brushed some imaginary dust on her coat’s front. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you. If you turn to ice, we’ll just chuck you overboard.”

He snorted. And surprisingly Nami didn’t have any comeback for that. She just stared at something before her. There was a wistful look on her face and an odd, serene countenance Zoro almost never sees in her. Nami has always been a fiery, explosive force. Seeing her calm and quiet was piquing his curiosity. 

He watched her as she gazed at the island in front of her.

“What’s that you’re looking at?”

“Hmm?” Nami turned her head back to him. “Nothing.” She thoughtfully chewed her bottom lip before her she went back to watching whatever it was that caught her eye.

Zoro quirked an eyebrow. She had his full attention now.

“Tch. You’re acting off. Should I be worried?”

At that question, Nami shifted gaze to him. There was a cheeky grin was on her face now.

“Ah Zoro! That’s so sweet of you!”

“Shut up.”

Nami chortled at his reaction. “I’m just studying the island,” she explained. “I’m wondering what it looks like with snow. It’s probably like a winter wonderland.”

Zoro just stared at her. Snow got her excited huh?

Didn’t she say it’s gonna fall anytime soon?

He suddenly stood up, earning a surprised look from Nami. He gave the whole island a quick glance.

“Let’s go for a walk.”

“Huh?”

Zoro let out a disgruntled sound. “I said let’s go for a walk.” He repeated, tilting his head towards the island.

“Uh why?” Nami stared at him dubiously. Why was he suddenly asking her to go for a random walk?

The green-haired man frowned. “You don’t want to?”

“Oh,” Nami intoned. Then she placed her hands on her cheeks in a gesture of astonishment. “Oh! You’re asking me to go for a walk with you!” She exaggeratedly gasped.

“What?” Zoro stared incredulously at her and her reaction. “I mean yeah I am!”

“But to you… that’s almost equivalent to asking someone out on a date!” The mapmaker pointed out teasingly.

“What?!”

“Aaaaaw, how can I say no?” Nami flashed him an exaggeratedly sweet smile, batting her eyelashes at him. “Yes Zoro I will go and walk with you.”

He glared at her and her obvious attempt at poking fun at him. “You know what, I changed my mind.”

“Huh?” Nami blinked up at him.

“I said I changed my mind.”

“No you don’t!” She said in a deadpan manner, not amused at how he abruptly changed his mind. “Let’s go!” She made a grab for his hand, tugging him toward the part where the ladder leading down the ship was.

“Fine,” Zoro hissed. “No need to pull that hard!”

She just grinned cheekily at him and continued yanking him.

“I said I’m already coming witch.” He muttered. But he still let the orange-haired woman pull him. Whatever possessed him to ask her that, he doesn’t know and he probably never will. 

He seemed to be doing and deciding unusual things when it comes to her lately.

“You better hold my hand Zoro so you don’t get lost.” Nami suggested when they reached the ladder.

“Can it witch! I don’t get lost!”

Her warm brown eyes narrowed and she was looking at him unamused. “I’d bet my next island’s allowance that it’s not even gonna take a minute before you disappear on me.”

“Hah. You’re on.” Zoro snorted at the absurdity of her claim. He doesn’t get lost. It was them that keep disappearing on him.

“You lose, I get your allowance.” Nami stuck her tongue out at him.

He gave her a slight nudge. “Come on witch. Let’s go before the others sees us.”

Nami shot him a confused look. She stared at him for a good few seconds before she snickered.

And Zoro was already dreading what she’s going to say after that.

“Oh wow all hush-hush and just the two of us.”

The look she had on her face made him grit his teeth.

“So it is like a secret date huh?” She innocently asked.

Zoro stared at her in aghast. He felt his face heat up.

Trust Nami to definitely know how to push his buttons.

“Nami. I swear to—”

“Shush Zoro and let’s go!” She swiftly cut him off with a quick jerk on his arm and one fist pumping in the air.

They quickly made their way down the ladder. It was strange that none of the crewmates where loitering about the ship to see them. Zoro surmised that it probably has something to do with the chilly weather. Mostly everyone is probably hiding in the warmth of respective rooms doing their own things or sleeping.

They walked in silence once they disembarked, keeping a good distance between them. Zoro shoved his hands on his pocket while Nami walked beside him, her hands clasped behind her, humming a ditty she probably picked up from one of Brook’s violin sessions as they trudged along the path leading to the pine forest and onwards into the island’s town.

He sneaked a glance at the navigator. She was still humming, but this time his ears registered a rather different tune, yet still from Brook’s pieces. She looked relaxed like she was actually enjoying the hushed moment between them.

“You’re not going to ask where we are going?” He finally inquired when she continued walking in quietude.

“Hmm?” She gave him a sideway glance. Then she smiled. “Figured out where gonna head straight to town so you can drink.”

Zoro chuckled. Well that wasn’t what was on his mind when he asked her earlier. But the tavern is most likely the place they’ll end up in once they reach town.

“I just want to walk,” he said before he can stop himself. He felt the familiar warmth appearing on his face. Like he just blurted out a secret no one was supposed to know.

“Uh-huh,” Nami nodded. “With me.”

Zoro stopped walking and turned his head towards her sharply.

There was that Cheshire cat-like grin on her lips again. Along with that knowing look in her eye.

When he didn’t reply, Nami just continued to walk forward nonchalantly. Like she didn’t just drop a bomb or something on him.

Shit. It was that obvious?

“You seemed to like doing some things with me lately.” The orange-haired woman stated without breaking her stride. She was humming again as she moved farther from Zoro.

Zoro stared at her back. And stared and stared.

She was right about that. He had hoped against hope that she wouldn’t catch on that easily as he tried to figure out what was the cause of this incessant urge to spend most of his waking time with her.

Near her.

Just within her presence.

But Nami was smart and she was sharp.

Grumbling lowly about how his luck sucked and how Nami would surely have the time of her life teasing him about it, he traipsed forward to follow her.

Nami stopped walking and was looking back amusedly at him. She adored this little slip of his. It was so obvious these last few weeks that the swordsman… may have taken a liking to her.

There was a scowl on his face as he approached her. And before he can even open his mouth to start a row or whatever with her, she beat him to it.

“Don’t worry Zoro,” she smiled. “I really like that you are doing things with me lately.”

They gazed at each other for a moment. Zoro with his mouth opening and closing as if he wanted to say something and Nami with her shoulders quaking slightly from trying to stop herself from giggling as he fumbled his way to a retort, a quick comeback or a snappy remark to save his face.

But they both knew it was futile.

Something fell on Nami’s nose, then on her lashes and she blinked in surprise. Shaking her head slightly, it took her a few seconds to realize what it was.

She looked up.

“Aah! It’s snowing!” She squealed as she observed the hundreds and thousands flecks rain down the sky, falling softly everywhere to swathe the whole island in a dazzling white enchantment.

Zoro was also looking up. So there it was. It had already fallen before they even make it to the town proper.

Good thing though because it did distract Nami somehow.

He suddenly felt her nudged him on the side. She had moved closer to him while he was busy watching at the falling snow.

“You had this on mind?” She asked playfully with a hint of mischievousness behind her brown eyes. “A walk in the falling snow?”

“Definitely no.” He grunted.

Nami chortled. “Romantic.”

“Shut it witch.”

“Aaw Zoro, who’d have known you’re really are sweet underneath all that grumpiness?” Nami said jokingly as she stepped closer to him. She brushed away the fallen snow that accumulated from his coat, only for them to be replaced by another and another. A wasted attempt really. 

She looked up at him from what she was doing and smiled. 

It felt like everything stopped at that. And Zoro drew in a deep breath. 

Damn it. Nami really got him bad.

He reached out to brush his thumb against her cheek making Nami halt her ministration.

In the midst of falling snow and white Zoro finally gave in to the urge and kissed her. 

[hephaestuscrew]

Minkowski's Position as Commander: An Attempted Analysis

TLDR: Increasingly as the show progresses, Minkowski's role as Commanding Officer of the Hephaestus is not about the position given her by Goddard but is instead about a choice that she and her crew continually make.

At the start of the series, Minkowski very much believes that she derives her authority from the position given her by Goddard Futuristics. It's clear that this military chain of command is really important to her. For example, when Hilbert attempts to leave Minkowski to die in space, the main thing she says to try to persuade him to let her in is:

This is treason. This is a betrayal of your commanding officer.

[CONTINUED BELOW THE CUT]

It's quite revealing that Minkowski thinks that military protocol / her role as Commanding Officer provides the most powerful reason for Hilbert not to kill her, even though he has known her for nearly two years and they have generally been on quasi-friendly terms.

After Hilbert's Christmas mutiny (and to a certain extent even before that), the Hephaestus crew know that Command cannot be trusted. The authority that initially conferred a position of power onto Minkowski has lied to them all and is actively malicious. So past that point, Minkowski's status as Commander isn't really determined by the fact that Goddard Futuristics gave her that position, because the crew have no reason to obey Goddard anymore. The basis of her authority no longer comes from Goddard, but more from a kind of unspoken agreement that someone needs to be in charge and it ought to be her. As rebellious as Eiffel and Hera both are, neither of them actually question Minkowski's status as Commanding Officer. It's true that they often don't obey her orders, but when they go against what she's said, it is with a conscious sense that they are disobeying not just another crew member, but their commanding officer.

The next major wrench to be thrown at Minkowski's Commander status is the arrival of Lovelace, who is arguably more qualified to be Commander than Minkowski. Not only has Lovelace commanded the Hephaestus herself (and for a longer period of time than Minkowski has), her title of Captain outranks Minkowski's title of Lieutenant. In Lovelace and Minkowski's power struggle after Lovelace's arrival, they are both coming from a perspective of "I was here first". Lovelace commanded that ship first, but Minkowski commanded that crew first and that ultimately gives her more power. Minkowski remains the Commander of the Hephaestus because the crew know her and trust her.

Eventually Lovelace comes to trust Minkowski too and to view her as the rightful Commander of the Hephaestus. In S3 and S4, she often backs up Minkowski's authority and tells the others that they ought to follow Minkowski's orders.

When Kepler shows up, there's a new official Commanding Officer of the Hephaestus. The si-5 declare that Minkowski is stripped of the title of Commander. Of course, I couldn't write this post without mentioning this iconic exchange:

EIFFEL I'm glad to see you too, Commander.

MINKOWSKI You heard the new boss, you don't need to call me that anymore.

EIFFEL Uh, yeah, they can go screw themselves. The entire universe will freeze before you're not the Commander of the Hephaestus.

Minkowski is ready to accept that she's no longer the Commander, because a part of her still thinks leadership is determined by the official chain of command. But Eiffel doesn't accept that. And he's not the only one who still acknowledges Minkowski as leader despite the arrival of the SI-5. Although her programming prevents her from addressing Minkowski as Commander, Hera believes that:

Lieutenant Minkowski's still the one who gives the marching orders.

Throughout Season 3, there's the sense of a crew-within-a-crew on the Hephaestus. Sure, Kepler is officially the overall commanding officer, but to Eiffel, Hera, Lovelace and even Hilbert to a certain extent, Minkowski is their true leader. Even though Lovelace and Hilbert do go behind Minkowski's back, they still seem to have a sense that a mutiny ought to have her Say So.

Another interesting element is that, in the eyes of Command, Minkowski was never the highest ranking crew member on the Hephaestus. Kepler confirms this in Ep48 when he says that the "Highest ranking member of each crew was briefed on the possibility" of a Theta scenario and that for both Hephaestus missions that was Hilbert. To Goddard Futuristics, Minkowski was the Commander in name only.

The Hephaestus crew (by which I mean everyone except the si-5) treat leadership as something official and codified, but not as something conferred by external authority. They follow a policy where one person has to be clearly designated as the Commander, but where Goddard Futuristics does not determine who that person is. This approach is displayed in Ep47 when Minkowski asks Lovelace to take over command of the Hephaestus. Minkowski's status as Commander is proved to have been a choice, because she can also choose not to be Commander. This choice is a personal one. There's no military protocol involved, just a discussion between two friends and the handing over of a title.

It's also worth noting Lovelace's reluctance to take over the role of commanding officer and her insistence that this is a temporary arrangement. Her reaction demonstrates how much she has come to see Minkowski as the rightful Commander. S2 Lovelace would have responded very differently.

When Minkowski becomes Commander again in Ep53, she has another conversation which reveals a lot about her attitude towards leadership. I'm just going to put the whole long quote here because I think it's all very relevant to what I've been talking about:

MINKOWSKI It's just... there's been all these times when somebody put me in situation where I was "in charge," but I wasn't... in control. I can't think of a decision in my life that wasn't already determined by someone else. But... even then, there was always a choice. I always made it. Even when I didn't realize I was making it. So now... I think I need to make choices by myself. For myself.

LOVELACE Aaaaand does that mean you're perhaps ready to take command of a certain space station again?...

MINKOWSKI No. Because I've never been in command, I can't retake it. But, if you'll allow me, sir, I would be honored to relieve you of your duties, and assume command of the U.S.S. Hephaestus Station.

Lovelace SMILES, and salutes Minkowski.

LOVELACE About friggin' time, sir.

Here it's made explicit that the question of Minkowski's status as Commander is tied into themes of choice and responsibility and control over one's own life. Minkowski recognises that her starting the Hephaestus mission as Commander was a choice made for her by Goddard (this is especially true because Minkowski applied to be just a Navigations Officer, not a Commander). Her continuing to be Commander was a choice, but it didn't feel like one to her at the time. To some extent, it was a choice she made passively (although I think her crew actively chose to follow her).

This conversation shows how Minkowski's view of leadership has changed dramatically. At the beginning of the series, she probably would have said that Goddard's choice to designate her Commander was what made her a Commander. She probably would have said that was how leadership ought to be determined. But by Ep53, she no longer wants to be dependent on the decisions of others to decide her role. Being Commander is not only a choice, it is now a choice she makes consciously and independently. She doesn't really have any more control over their circumstances when she retakes command in Ep53 than she did before handing over command in Ep47. Nonetheless her decision to make active choices for herself is still a significant one, because it reflects a paradigm shift.

Of course, there is some cruel irony in the fact that very soon after this conversation Minkowski is put under Pryce's mind control. Sometimes the choice to take control of our lives is taken away. Notably though, Eiffel still calls her Commander when she's not even able to command her own actions. And when she does regain her autonomy, she automatically assumes command of a new crew-within-a-crew (Eiffel, Hera, Lovelace, and Jacobi).

Cutter recognises how important Minkowski's role as Commander is to her. In the finale, he tells her:

People cared about you because of what I made you: A soldier. A leader. A commander. I gave you that

But I would argue that this isn't true. Yes, it was Cutter who initially gave Minkowski the title of "Commander", but that was never what made her a leader. Goddard never saw Minkowski as a leader. They saw her as a tool. She became a leader in her own right because she strived to do the right thing for her crew and because her crew trusted her to lead them.

For a final example of how important Minkowski's role as Commander is to her, here's what she says to reintroduce herself to Eiffel after the memory wipe:

Hi. My name is Renée Minkowski. I'm the Commander of this space station.

At this point, Minkowski knows that the space station in question is not going to exist for much longer. She knows its been a long time since Goddard would have said she was the Commanding Officer of the Hephaestus in any sense. And yet, the second thing she wants Eiffel to know about her is that she is the Commander. She asks him to call her Renée, but she still wants him to view her as a commanding officer. This makes sense when we recognise that the trust of her crew - and of Eiffel in particular - has been the essential foundation of her status as Commander after the foundation from Goddard fell away.

Throughout the course of Wolf 359, with the various revelations about Command and with the arrivals of Lovelace, the si-5 and eventually Cutter & Co., the official reasons to classify Minkowski as the Hephaestus' commanding officer are eroded. But Minkowski still ends the show as a Commander. She's the one who decides whether they are going to stay and try to stop Cutter's plan (the others recognise that it's up to her even when they disagree with her initial decision to leave without trying to fight Cutter). Lovelace calls her Commander even after the Hephaestus is gone. Minkowski represents the ship when speaking to Earthspace ATC. And she's the one who finally brings the crew home.

[asphalt-cocktail]

Finding my way back

Summary: Nearly a decade after you and John break up you manage to find your way back to him.

A/N: Hello my dears! So I wrote this for Beatle and Queen secret santa exchange! Apologies it’s not heavily Christmas/holiday themed; it does take place during winter so I hope that counts for something. I hope you enjoy your fic as much as i enjoyed writing it @sweetrosetta-martin​! I wrote this after I heard the song Green Papaya by Lianne La Havas which makes me feel some type of way. Also shout out to @casafrass​ and @moodysunflowergirl​ for putting this together! Thank you for all your hard work and organization for this! 

Pairing: John Lennon x Female!Reader

Warnings: Okay friends, we’ve got a bit of everything in here! It’s got some mild illusions to smut and steamy smooches, some angst, some fluff, pinning, longing, break ups, cigarettes, alcohol (I think), swearing, we’ve got Teddy boy!John and 70s!John. But no actual smut. 

Word Count: 5.4k

Your heart ached in your chest as you sat in front of John, “What do you mean we can’t see each other anymore?” Your voice cracked with emotion.

John watched your watery eyes from behind his glasses and let out a deep sigh, “I’m going to be touring a lot and Brian wants us to move to London, so I just…” His own voice cracked with emotion, “So I just don’t think we should keep seeing each other.” He looked away unable to maintain eye contact with you.

“But we survived Germany!” You protested back, “It will be okay, I can visit you when you have shows nearby,” You wanted this to work, being with John felt like home. You sniffed, “You know like wait backstage with flowers and everything.” You said and began to rub your stinging eyes.

You were right, the two of you had survived Germany, but it was only because it lasted a few short months and your relationship was open out of respect for the two of you; John didn’t know how long this Beatles thing was going to last and from the looks of it, it was going to last quite a while. John rubbed the tears from behind his glasses, smudging his finger along the lenses and clouding the vision of your perfect face. He squeezed your hand tightly in his own, “It’ll be fine I promise,” He said pausing to kiss your knuckles, “I love you [Y/N] I really do, and if it’s meant to be we will be together again.” He gave you one last chaste kiss; your faces were wet from tear and it was sad and short lived. You embraced him tightly inhaling the scent of cigarettes, mint gun, and a smell that was so distinctly John before finally letting him go to part ways.

The two of you exchanged letters for the first few months of his first tour, but at this point it has been so long that you didn’t remember who stopped writing who and honestly, why did it matter? John was constantly an aching thought in the back of your mind, and you had constant reminders of him from posters to news articles, to full size cardboard cut outs that sat in record stores. It seemed everywhere you turned you saw him which only increased the yearning.

It took several months but you finally found yourself back in a routine that didn’t include John, it was almost like when he went to Germany except this time he wasn’t coming back for good. You finished up school, found a job working in marketing, and had several shitty boyfriends before you found yourself in New York city working in the marketing division of a fashion brand and met Noah. He was nice, but he wasn’t John.

He didn’t smoke cigarettes, or wear glasses, and couldn’t understand art. But he was here, and the sex was pretty okay.

Noah was nice and he made you a pot of coffee every morning he slept over and didn’t try to pry too far into your personal life. All around you didn’t have any qualms with him; it just didn’t feel complete.

The scent of freshly roasted coffee drifted through your home as you woke up with your alarm clock blaring in your ears. You sat up, rubbing the sleep from your eyes and rolled out of bed. Noah was busying himself in the kitchen, you should just ask him to move in at this point. “Did you get the paper?” You asked sitting down at the table.

“On the counter, love.” He answered before grabbing it and sliding it across the table towards you. Much to your surprise in big bold letters on the front page “PAUL SPLITS THE BEATLES” were plastered across it. Naturally a picture of the doe-eyed man you once called a friend accompanied it as well as a smaller picture of the group.

“Fucking Christ.” You mumbled to yourself and turned the page, hoping to find something else to read, some couple getting married or some advice column, but no, your eyes continued to draw themselves back to the fab four and specifically John. He looked wildly different now; long hair, glasses, eccentric wardrobe all made him look almost unfamiliar

You finally gave in and read the article; from what you observed in the news and on television tensions were high between the four and it seemed as though fame had gotten the best of them, “Crazy, right?” Noah asked handing you a cup of coffee, “Who would have thought? It looked like they were going to be together forever. But get your riches and split I guess, yeah?”

A sour feeling filled your belly, John and Paul cared more about the Beatles than Noah could ever know. The idea of get rich and dip was ridiculous, wasn’t it? “I don’t think that is the case.” You mumbled before abruptly getting up to get ready for work, forgetting your morning coffee.

It had been almost a decade since you had last seen John, and a lot could have changed. He was no longer the tough teddy boy you had grown to love. His hair had grown out and he was with Yoko Ono now, from the looks of if they were essentially attached at the hip. A part of you hoped you and Noah would never achieve that level of need in your relationship.

Unfortunately, as months passed there seemed to be no other way to progress your and Noah’s relationship and one day he slept over and never left. You no longer had your own space to escape to or much alone time aside from when Noah came home an hour after you from work. You felt throttled and frankly didn’t like it, nor did you like Noah much anymore. It seemed like the right step though, after three years of dating; you could tell Noah craved monogamy.  

Your day at work was long and exhausting. All you could think of was your hour of peace and quiet before Noah came home and talked about his boring life at work. If you had to use a color to describe your life it would be grey, dull, boring, no vibrancy or excitement.

New York was full of bright vibrant colors and never slept; it was much livelier that than the cloudy northern United Kingdom city you once called home, but in the small apartment that you lived in there was constant monotony. Waking up, making coffee, going to work, coming home, reading and making dinner, going to sleep; only to repeat that for five days in a row and then sit around the house during the weekend, or leave to get groceries if you were lucky. If you were unlucky, Noah’s accountant friends would come over and talk your ear off about their corporate work life you just couldn’t wrap your head around.

Your mind was swimming with thoughts, mostly about your stagnant life as you navigated your way off the subway once you reached your stop and walked off. It was loud and cramped as everyone flooded off; you kept your head low and pushed your way through the crowd. A firm, but boney shoulder pushed into you causing your thoughts to flee and your brows furrowed as you looked up, “Watch it, asshole.” You mumbled under your breath and looked up before you froze.

Your eyes locked with a pair of eyes that were all too familiar and all the breath in your body seemed to leave, “[Y/N]?” John asked you, seemingly just as shocked as you were.

Despite being in the subway station the world around you stopped. A few sputtering words came out to form an incoherent sentence as you were consumed with shock. Your body became ridged and you sharply exhaled before turning and continuing your short jaunt home.

That night you laid on your side and your mind was consumed with so many thoughts, mostly John if you were being honest. You’d thought you had long since blocked the ghost from your memory, but it appeared that seeing him caused a number of memories to rouse from the depths of your consciousness. You hated it. John Lennon was once again living in your head rent free.

Noah gripped your side and kissed along your shoulders and neck while his hand rubbed your hips and slowly began to wander upwards towards your breasts. The sudden touch caused you to jump, “Not tonight,” You mumbled trying to sound tired.

Noah let out a soft sigh before giving your shoulder one last kiss, “Sorry, you had a long day, love.” He said pulling you close against him and resting his head on your shoulder. As you pretended to sleep you laid in your bed and stared at the wall of darkness in your room.

When the hell did John come to New York?

Did he live nearby?

Was Yoko with him?

Questions swirled around in your mind; questions that would not get answered unless you actively sought out an answer.

As sleep consumed you, you dreamt of John.

The Reeperbahn had a smell you would never forget. You didn’t know cities could have distinct smells until you traveled to Germany to visit John for the first time since he had left Liverpool. It was a combination of pollution, beer, and a smell you had hoped to never figure out what caused it. From his letters this place seemed larger than life, and when you took your first steps off the train you saw it was.

John tackled you with a warm hug, he smelled like sweat, beer, and cigarettes, “You stink.” You grinned and laughed as he kissed your face all over.

“Our options are kind of limited, love.” He grinned and wrapped his arm around your waist keeping you close to him as the two of you walked down the busy street.

He took you to a restaurant, you honestly hadn’t expected him to take you on a date especially with where you were and how little money he had. “Come on, I’ve got a show in two hours,” He grinned, excited to have you watch him play.

“And then we met this group of Germans, they’ll be at the show tonight. I know you’ll love them.” His eyes crinkled as he smiled at you, “Stu is going with one of them, Astrid. She’s great too, her ma lets us shower at her place and makes us dinner sometimes.” You soaked in all the stories John had to share.

His life seemed so exciting here in Germany, but you could see how exhausted he was beginning to get, “You’ve got to hear how we sound now, Pete’s still shit, but Paul, George and I are really getting better.” He shifted in his seat and poked at his food, “I don’t know if Stu is going to stick with us much longer though; he’s been talking about going back to art school.”

That night you and John slept cramped together in his little bunk bed in the back room. You woke up to him rubbing your arm with the tips of his calloused fingers and he kissed your shoulder.

Rolling over you captured his lips in a soft kiss, he tasted of beer and cigarettes and he clung to you, holding you so close it almost hurt. Breaking the kiss, he began to pepper soft kisses along your jaw and neck, “I love you so much,” He said between heavy breaths.

“I love you too John.” You responded letting out a soft whimper as his fingers began to rub you through the cloth short wore to sleep.

With a gasp you shot up in bed, coated in a layer of sweat and looked around the still dark room, wide eyed. Noah rubbed his sleepy eyes as he woke up, “What’s wrong, hun?” He asked.

You gained control of your breathing once more and laid back down, still uncomfortably sweaty; “Nothing, just a nightmare.” You answered and swallowed thickly.

---

For weeks, John plagued your mind and you were starting to convince yourself that you hadn’t truly seen him and that you were just going crazy. Your sleep was becoming more and more restless as time went on. It got so noticeable that even Noah questioned it.

“Take some time off, hun, you work too much.” He said.

So that was what you did. You finally had a week off after what felt like ages.

It was nice, but you were barely half a day into your vacation, and you began to feel restless. What could you possibly do to fill your time?

Your mind began to wander and drift off to thoughts of John; a wave of nausea immediately washed over you. “I need to leave.” You abruptly said and grabbed your purse and house keys before leaving your flat.

You soon found yourself at Central Park. Despite it being autumn, the weather was nice, the kind of nice where you look outside, and it seems warmer than it is. The breeze was soft but brisk you walked through the park enjoying the breath of fresh air. As you walked through the running paths you admired the changing leaves and the crunching sound they made under your feet.

You eyed a bench that overlooked The Lake, so cleverly named, and brushed the fallen leaves that covered it before you sat down. For once you felt like your mind was free from worry and the anxieties that had been consuming you the last several weeks.

That was until you got up and saw a familiar figure walking down the path that would directly cause yours. A shot of adrenaline shot through you and your heart began to race. It was as though your fight or flight responses had kicked in and they were telling you to get the fuck out of there. You frantically looked around and it felt like a lose-lose situation with whatever option you chose. So, you stayed; how bad was it going to be? Maybe he wouldn’t even notice?

John walked past your little out cove and glanced at you and then looked again, “Fucking hell.” He mumbled stopping in his tracks.

The two of you stood frozen, staring at each other for what seemed like a lifetime before John finally broke the silence, “I thought I saw you at the subway station.” He said bluntly, his familiar voice causing a warm feeling to erupt in your belly and spread to the tips of your fingers.

You opened your mouth and closed it, trying to think of something to say, “You did.” Was what you finally spoke.

“Right,” He sighed, looking down in defeat.

You stuffed your hands in your pockets and shifted the weight on your feet, “Do you want to sit?” You asked abruptly.

John looked at you through his round lenses and nodded, “Sure, I could sit for a while.” He answered.

The two of you sat across from each other on your respective benches, “So, how long have you lived here for?” John asked watching you nervously pick at your fingers.

You looked up from your hands, “About 6 years now.” You leaned back, now feeling confident enough to study his features. His face was thinner, age lines had begun to map themselves out on his face, and his hair was messily layered and framed the sides of his face nicely. He was still as handsome as ever, “How long have you lived here for?”

John cleared his throat and pulled out his cigarettes, placing one in his mouth, “About two years now,” the conversation was weird, like the two of you didn’t know what to talk about. You watched as John’s long fingers light his cigarette, the spicy smell filling the space between the two of you and the smoke delicately curling up towards the sky, “So do you work near by or something?” He asked casually crossing his legs and resting his arm on the back of the bench.

You shook your head, “No, I don’t I just needed to get out of the house.” You said, staring at the reason you felt urged to leave your home in the first place, “I only live about six blocks away. It’s a nice walk.” You added, your stomach suddenly feeling sour as you remembered Noah.

John hummed, inhaling deeply on the cigarette the ember burning a bright red before dimming ever so slightly, “Do you work at all?” His tone came off ruder than expected, but you knew he didn’t intend for it to.

“Marketing.” You answered simply. Your brain swam with question you had for your former lover, “Do you live nearby?” You asked returning the question back to him.

John nodded behind him, “The Dakotas.” He mimicked your shortness. You looked and could see the large building peaking out from the tops of the trees.

You hummed, “Must be nice.” You said flashing him a closed mouth smile.

“It is.” He added and stood up, taking one last deep inhale before stubbing out his half-smoked cigarette in the snow and putting it in his pocket, “You look good, you know.” He said, his eyes studying your seated form before settling on your face.

Suddenly feeling self-conscious and very aware of your existence you crossed pulled your winter coat tighter around you, “So do you John.” You responded, “You’ll have to show me your place sometime.” You boldly suggested.

John flashed you a crooked smile before fishing around in his pocket, “Call me and I’ll see if I can fit you into my schedule.” He said before handing you a business card. Of course, he had business cards.

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes as you took the thick and expensive paper and pocketed it, “I’ll have my people call your people.” You allowed a smile to break your nervous features.

That night your mind saw no peace. You sat in the bathroom staring at the business card in your hand. It was nearly 3 am and the delicate gold letters reflected in the shitty florescent lights that made your eyes ache as you repeatedly read the phone number and name.

The rest of your vacation it seemed as though you were not going to get the mental break you so desperately craved. You watched as Noah left for work and felt a pang of guilt rising in your chest; a pice of you felt greedy for wanting to see John again. So, you figured it would be best to tuck it away in the back of your mind to the place where your other thoughts of John lived and put the card away in a shoe box and tried to forget.

---

Forgetting about your interaction with John seemed to work well, that is until you and Noah broke up.

He stood in the doorway with the boxes of his things. You could tell he didn’t feel great, and neither did you. But a piece of you felt thankful that he was finally moving out. After seeing John your body craved the spontaneity that he used to give you, and the spontaneity that Noah had lacked.

Once the last of his things were moved from your apartment you felt as though a weight had been lifted off your shoulders. You felt good, like a breath of fresh air. You busied yourself by rearranging your home and filling the empty spaces that Noah left after he and his belongings vacated your space.

As you moved your shoe boxes and rearranged your closet a business card slipped from the tear in one of them. It was the one that John had given you only a few months ago.

Your breath hitched in your throat as you stared at the intricate gold letters you familiarized yourself with that night that seemed so long ago. You looked at the clock, it was only 4 PM and you had hoped he wasn’t busy.

You curled up on your couch and held the phone receiver against your ear listening to it ring as you absentmindedly played with the stiff card in your hand.

“Hello?” You instantly recognized John’s voice.

“John?” You responded back, “It’s, um, it’s [Y/N]” You felt a surge of nerves pulse through you.

“You know, I expected you to call sooner.” John skipped the formal greetings.

You couldn’t help but let out a nervous laugh, “Yeah, sorry about that. I suppose nerves got the best of me.” It wasn’t a whole truth, but a half truth, “Do you think you’d be interested in showing me your place sometime?” you asked remembering back to the conversation the two of you had several months prior.

John hummed and you could hear the soft rustle of paper in the background before he cleared his throat, “Yeah, I suppose I could fit you in. Did you want to stay for dinner?”

Your heart thudded in your chest, “Dinner?” You question out loud and let out a puff of air, “Yeah, I suppose I could.”

“Right, so 6 o’clock sound good?” John asked, “I can send a car for you.”

“A car?” You asked, not accustom to the luxuries of being a Beatle, “I can walk it’ll be fine.”

John let out a sigh, “It’s freezing outside and nearly pitch black. You aren’t walking.” He said firmly.

“Fine.” You answered in defeat and gave him your address to send the car.

“Right, be ready by 5:30.” He said  

“Shit, okay.” You said before bidding him farewell and scrambling to get ready. The sleek black car arrived and drove you to the Dakotas. It was nice, far nicer than any building you had ever been in before. The driver walked you up to John’s apartment and let you in.

The room was decorated in a hodgepodge of John’s interests, from music to art to antiques; with everything tastefully on display. John walked out, dressed casually in a shirt, jeans, and no shoes and drank in your figure as you stripped off your jacket. You shifted nervously under his intense gaze, “So, you wanted a tour, yeah?” John asked.

You nodded and watched as he crossed his arms over his chest, admiring how his biceps flexed and bulged when his hands rested in position, “Yeah, a tour.” You said secretly hoping this would amount to much more than a tour.

John stretched his arms out, “Well welcome to my humble home.” He greeted in a grandiose manor.

Humble, right.

John’s home was more extravagant than you could have imagined. It was much better than the apartment he lived in with Stu or the back room they had in Hamburg and even better than when he lived with Mimi. He had several cats that roamed around his home; it made you smile and remember the time he brought a stray home and convinced Mimi to keep him. It seemed as though old habits died hard when it came to John.

The two of you made your way back to his living room and he sat down on his couch, “Come on, sit.” He said patting the spot next to him.

“Oh,” You abruptly said, not noticing you had been standing in the middle of the room studying the various things on the wall, “Right.” You quickly sat on the couch uncomfortably stiff, “So… dinner?” You asked.

John nodded his head, not having forgotten the food and pulled out a box of take out menus, “Do you want to order something, I haven’t gotten much for groceries this week.” He admitted sheepishly.

You rifled through the various menus in his collection, “So,” You started, “Where is Yoko?” You asked honestly wondering where his other half was.

“We’re separated right now.” He said sounding uncomfortable.

You glanced over at John and noted his somber expression, this was obviously a topic he didn’t want to talk about. “Sorry to pry.” You said before sliding him the menu of one of your favorite Chinese restaurants in the area.

“It’s a valid question.” He stated, now intently focused on the menu, “What about you?” He asked, peaking up to glance at you before quickly looking away.

“What do you mean?”

“You know, your love life and what not.” He followed up quickly.

You shifted uncomfortably, “Oh, well my ex just moved out today.”

John arched one of his thick brows, “Hm,” He grunted, “Nice lad?” He questioned.

You shrugged, “Yeah, I suppose. Just boring.” You answered thinking back to the stale and stagnant version of your life that was your reality only a week ago.

John watched you frown in distain before he got up to place your orders, “What did you want again?” He asked.

“The number 23 dinner special with an eggroll.” You had your order memorized.

As John placed the order on his telephone, you listened to the sound of his muffled voice and leaned back on the couch. It was interesting how despite not seeing each other for nearly a decade, you still found your way back to him. One of his cats climbed their way on your lap and purred as you scratched behind its ears.

“She likes you.” John said as he walked back into the room, “Food should be here in 45 minutes.” He said plopping back down. The black cat nuzzled its head into your head and let out a soft meow.

“What’s her name?” You asked enjoying the attention your newfound friend was giving you.

“Salt.” He said, a smile cracking his features.

“Salt?” You asked letting out a small huff of laughter.

“Her sister, Pepper is somewhere around here.” He said reaching over and petting Salt, scratching her behind the ears.

Your 45 minutes with John was spent chatting and catching up, he talked about Mimi and told you that she asked about you often and he never knew how to respond, and you talked to him about how you finished college and began your marketing job.

It was interesting how the two of you were able to smooth over the awkwardness of your conversation in just a few short hours, unlike your previous run ins. The familiar warm feeling you would get every time you’d talk to him quickly returned. When your food arrived the doorman from the front of the building brought it up and the two of you laid out your spread on the coffee table.

John walked over to a shelf of movies and pulled one out. He turned towards you, flashing you the box. It didn’t surprise you when he showed you Clockwork Orange. It was a very John movie, “Want to watch it?” He asked smiling softly.

You nodded your head, “Pop it in.” You said waving your hand towards his television.

The movie played in the background as the two of you continued to talk and eat your takeaway, “How are you doing?” You asked.

“I’m fine, how are you?” He responded a confused expression plastered on his face.

You shook your head, “No, John I really mean it; how are you?” You said giving him a sympathetic expression.

Putting his chopsticks down, John sighed, “I don’t know.” He pursed his lips deep in thought, “I mean I suppose I’ve been better.” He answered honestly, “I mean, my wife left me, my friends I’ve known for the last two decades don’t really want much to do with me.” John shrugged his should and looked away from you.

You nodded your head reaching over and grabbing his hand, rubbing it with your thumb before you patted it lightly and pulled it away. John chased your hand with his own and laced his fingers with yours. The rough underside of his palm brushed against your soft ones. The contrasting touch made you shiver, “I missed you.” He said and squeezed your hand.

John brought your hand to the side of his face and pressed your palm to his cheek, leaning into the warmth of your hand, “I missed you too.” You said as you thumb stroked his cheek bone. He turned his face and kissed your skin.

Your breath hitched in the back of your throat and the feeling of John’s lips burned into your palm. You watched him, his eyes closed and a calm expression taking over his tense body. Slowly you slid closer to him, closing what little space was between the two of you, “John,” You said breaking the soft silence that had settled between the two of you. He hummed and looked up at you urging you to continue, “You know what you told me when we broke up?”

John looked down, you could tell that the topic hurt him as much as it hurt you, “If it’s meant to be, we’ll find each other.” He said softly now looking at your fingers as he played with them.

In this moment he just looked like John, you’re John you had last seen nearly a decade ago. You pulled your fingers away from him and cupped his face, forcing him to look at you. Hesitantly you moved closer to him, feeling the warmth of John’s body radiating off him. Your heart thumped loudly in your ears as your noses touched, lightly brushing against each other.

A soft whimper manifested itself in the back of your throat and trickled out when you felt John press his lips against yours. He pulled your close against his chest and held you against him tightly craving your warmth and body. Your mouths moved with a familiar synchronicity, so familiar it caused your stomach to ache as you frantically clung to John. Your hand managed to fall from his face and tangle itself in his shirt as you tried to pull him closer.

The way your nose bumped against his glasses reminded you of when you were 18 and sneaking into Mimi’s house, giggling as he told you to quiet down while the two of you kissed. You couldn’t help but smile at the memory.

John pulled away and left open mouth kisses on your chin and jaw and finally on your kiss. He immediately went to his favorite spot placing a wet open-mouthed kiss on it. You gasped at the feeling and craned your neck urging him for more.

Which he gladly gave you, pulling more sweet sounds from your mouth. He pulled back and studied your face through hooded eyes. John’s hand came up and he stroked the side of your face with the back of his hand. His touch was light and the back of his hand soft. You let out a sigh and leaned into his touch before looking back at him.

You laid back and pulled John against your chest. He responded by wrapping his arms around you and nuzzling his head into you, “I’m sorry for what’s happened John,” You said and admired the weight of his body against yours.

John rubbed his face into your chest and didn’t look at you, “Stay the night, please.” He pleaded with you.

You rubbed his back as he clung to you, your heart ached hearing the loneliness in his voice, “Of course.” You said and kissed the top of his hair. John hummed with content feeling your fingers tracing patterns against his back.

The following morning you woke up next to John, his arm firmly wrapped around you and hair buried in the back of your neck. You turned around and wrapped your free arm him while your other remained pinned on your side. John let out a soft sigh and pulled you close against his chest and kissed the top of your head. You’d forgotten how much you missed and craved affection. You moved to leave, and John pulled you back, “Don’t leave me,” He said softly.

“I have to use the bathroom.” You said smiling and turning towards John.

He let out a playful groan, “Fine.” He said rolling over and sprawling out on his bed like a starfish.

When you returned John was still in the same position, you’d left him in. As you crawled back into the bed John’s arms slithered around you like a snake and pulled you into his chest. You inhaled deeply, missing his smell and smiled against the thin shirt he wore to bed.

In just a short amount of time the life that had once felt so grey and strange was now beginning to once again feel like home.

[heloflor]

So, given that I didn’t have much time to work on fics recently because school, I’ve decided to relieve some stress by making a random representation of how I imagine Cavendish and Dakota’s house in their time-period looks like. And since I have no plans to ever describe it in detail in a fic, here it is ! Though, given how bad I am with designs, showing the house is mostly an excuse to infodump on domestic headcanons.

Regarding the last names, I didn’t make a typo for Cav. I like to imagine the two getting married way before the events of the show, with Cav taking “Dakota” as a last name, mostly because he got several siblings in-law on the Dakota side who adopted him on the spot.

And about the representation of the house : yeah it looks like shit. Since I can’t draw, I’ve decided to do something rather quick using MSPaint but yeah, not the best thing in the world. Though, if I get back to playing the Sims 3 at some point and end up making a Dwampyverse savefile, I’ll most likely try to recreate that house and could share a few pics.

I also went with a rectangular house with one floor instead of some futuristic-looking thing, mostly because I have no imagination when it comes to design. Though, you could still use the excuse that they want something more “old-timey” given their job or that they don’t have all the money of the world so they chose a simple house for the small cost. But yeah, by the end of the day, the choice is mostly because I can’t design shit.

But still one thing in my defense : looking at episodes that take place in the future like “Missing Milo” or “First Impressions”, it seems that most buildings are square-y with the roof being the weirdly-shaped part, with B.O.T.T. being one of the few exceptions. And looking at “A Christmas Peril”, the buildings are definitely more wacky but it’s 20 years later so…

I could also mention that I’m a bit unsatisfied with how empty the living-room and the bedroom ended up being but I’m drawing a total blank when trying to come up with the kind of stuff Vinnie and Balth would have that are linked to their interests. Though, maybe the excuse of them not being often at the house works ? Idk. Let’s just say I have ideas for the “basic” stuff, aka what you find in basically every single middle-class house, but draw a complete blank for anything that’s decorative. Still posting a map of the house tho because I don’t really consider it a work in progress if I simply have no idea and may never do. I’m very bad at design so bear with me on that one ! It’s not only about the house, it’s also about the fluffy headcanons !

So here’s under the cut some random info about the look of the rooms and furniture + a bunch of headcanons regarding Vinnie and Balth’s lives in this house. For each part of the house, you first have the info about how it looks first and then the headcanons.

Those headcanons are made with the idea that Vinnie and Balth are married (duh) but also, for a few, that Vinnie has three siblings + a few in-laws that he has a good relationship with.

(very long post ahead)

General :

- They bought the house in 2162, 2 years after getting married.

- It’s in the suburbs, or at least what the future version of the suburbs would look like. In other words, the presence of a backyard is debatable.

- There could be a garage for their time vehicle, so that they don’t have to go to headquarters every single day. And if not an actual garage, there’s at least some space to put it. In both cases, it would be near the bedroom’s side of the house.

- While the walls outside would have that futuristic “metallic” look, the walls inside would be a bit warmer. At the very least, the inside isn’t “future metallic white”, especially with Vinnie having photophobia.

- The intensity of the lights in every room can be adjusted. That way, Vinnie can put the dimmest light and navigate the house without his glasses. This is mostly useful for showering and midnight snacks.

- When they went house-hunting, Balth was the one who insisted that they needed a place with those kinds of lights. This is also the same kind of lights that Vinnie had in his now-former apartment.

- You know how near the end of the episode “First Impressions” you have Balth going into Mr. Block’s office ? Well, the way the door opens in that moment is how the door opens for every room of the house, perhaps excluding the main entrance (I like the idea of their front door being an “old” one, aka the “normal” doors we have today).

- Every room would have a spot that can create “tactile panels”, like some holographic tablet that can be used to change the settings of the house, for example changing the lights or the internet or even lock the doors and blinds.

- In 2175, when they were forced to leave the future, Vinnie stole a device from B.O.T.T. that made him able to create some kind of forcefield around the house that only he and Balth can remove. So, even if they’re not there anymore, the house still is theirs and can’t be sold to anyone else. And before you ask why B.O.T.T. didn’t simply send agents to bring the duo back and force them to open the shield : the forcefield works with hand-scan detection and Vinnie convinced Balth to use their left hands, the hands with the wedding rings. So if time-agents come knocking, they could try convincing the agents to let them use the bathroom first and they could wash their hands and use the soap to remove the rings. That way, the scan wouldn’t work and the agents would have no way of knowing why.

    Living room :

- There’s more furniture than showed here like souvenirs from previous missions or some random stuff that belongs to them. I just don’t have enough imagination. : /

- Likewise, the corridor has a few pictures or posters, like pictures that Vinnie didn’t have the space to put in his memory room but still wanted to display. Also, I want to say that Vinnie would display pictures of his family (sibling, in-laws and nephews) but I’ll see him more as having an album for family pictures, or a framed picture on his nightstand.

- There could definitely be a carpet or two. They would either be modern ones to fit the fact that they’re from the future or vintage stuff found in some of their missions. One of the carpets would be under the coffee table. Another would be in the big-ass space between the living-room and the kitchen, or in the corridor.

- The style is a mix between old and new stuff, with also a few things related to their interests. Like, for example, the couch could have an animal pattern or something (AND BY THAT I DON’T MEAN REAL ANIMAL FUR).

- Speaking of the couch, after looking up “futuristic couch” on the internet, they would absolutely have one of those gigantic couches that have like a bed attached to them due to how big they are. Btw I have no idea which company came up with this design and I couldn’t care less. It’s just that the design looks cool and would fit a futuristic house.

- The side table is a floating square, given how we see in “A Christmas Peril” that tables in the future don’t have feet anymore (that’s one way to protect your toes).

- The floor lamp is more futuristic. It’s like a white orb attached to a lamp foot.

- The TV is attached to the wall. The remote is some kind of holographic tablet, kind of like the house settings thingy.

  - This is where Balth would spend most of his mornings and evenings when they stay home. He’d just be sitting with a cup of tea, most of the time also a book, with the sun illuminating the room, just feeling comfortable and peaceful. The side table/cube was bought specifically for Balth’s tea. He would also use the lamp while reading in the late evening, either for the peace of having little to no light and solely focusing on the book or as a way for Vinnie to be in the room with the lights at the lowest setting. And speaking of Vinnie, he would sometimes join his husband on the couch, lying down with his head resting on Balth’s legs (cue Vinnie falling asleep, leading to a frustrated Balth who needs to pee but doesn’t want to wake him up).

- Since there’s a mini-table for when Balth drinks tea, the table right in front of the couch is mostly used for Vinnie to rest his legs on.

- And speaking of fluffy headcanons : movie nights. From time to time, aka minimum once a month, probably more, the couple would be in their pajamas cuddling on the couch while watching a movie, with Dennis resting in Balth’s arms.

For the movie choices, Balth would choose science-fiction, especially if there are any Professor-Time-themed movies, but also historical fiction (for some reason I tend to see Balth as having a liking for history ? I think it’s because of the way he dresses + his small rant about pirates in “Game Night” ? Idk honestly. It’s mostly a random headcanon that’s here for some weird reason). As for Vinnie, it’s mostly animal documentaries (Balth falls asleep halfway through but Vinnie doesn’t notice until after it’s over) or animated/family movies (the future equivalent of D*sney, S*ny pitcures, P*xar etc. Which are movies Balth would enjoy as well). For some weird reason I’ll also see the two of them being into mystery movies (crime-solving movies basically).

And if they sometimes decide to watch other genres, I could see Balth having a liking for some romance movies, because for some reason I like the idea of Balth being sappy. Besides, the guy is passionate when it comes to proving himself at his jobs and takes them pretty seriously in order to reach his objective. And given how he can be insecure and sometimes feels like a ball of anxiety, who’s to say he isn’t passionate when it comes to love too ? And no, I don’t mean passionate as in “making out all the time”, I mean passionate as in taking relationships seriously and making it work while also wishing to make sure his partner knows that he’s loved, even if Balth isn’t really the best at expressing his affection all the time.

On a different note, to get back to other genres : Vinnie would probably like horror movies. Because if cuddling in front of a sappy movie is great, having your husband show his love and trust for you by clinging to your arm out of fear is even better, nevermind the fact that you’re as terrified as he is.

    Kitchen :

- It’s one of those kitchens with two walls of cupboards/cabinets, both on the ground and elevated. One of the cabinets is used entirely for snacks. Because Vinnie.

- The wall separating the kitchen and the living room “has a hole in it”. It’s like you have a small wall with cupboards, a hole, and a wall connected to the ceiling with a few cabinets. Basically, you look up “kitchen cupboards” and imagine that the space in-between is a hole instead of the wall (why is it so hard to explain something so simple ?).

- This would be the most futuristic-looking room of their house. Looking up at references, they’re that Pinterest post showing a room with white cabinets with round corners and what seems to be slide doors. This is pretty much how I’ll see their kitchen, except bigger, with a different wall color and with one wall not being here (see above).

- The table is floating because of course it does. The chairs don’t tho. Also the chairs are as futuristic as the rest of the room. And looking up the internet again, the chairs are shaped like chairs.

  - So I put a stove but tbh I’m not sure how much these two would cook, given how in the show they’re always seen eating out (granted they don’t have a kitchen in their ‘apartment’ in Milo’s time). And given how most things seem automatized in the future, let’s just assume that the house can do most of the cooking itself with like a robot (aka plot-convenience technology) but still needs the necessary furniture and ingredients for the recipes. Also, if there’s an issue with their cooking system, they’ll probably know a few recipes and can feed themselves (Vinnie’s oldest brother Enzie would definitely teach his younger siblings a few recipes, at least enough to survive on their own. And he would be more than happy to teach his brother in-law as well).

- I put 4 chairs at the table but honestly I could see them keep 2 at all times and put the others in the storage room, especially the times they get very busy with their job for a few weeks and don’t have the time for social life.

- At some point, Balth probably tried to convince Vinnie to have better food habits and tried to put his snacks on the higher shelves. Not only did it not work because chairs exist but also it led to Vinnie getting frustrated. So Balth dropped it. Though, he would still try to talk Vinnie into working out to stay rather healthy.

    Memories room :

- Vinnie’s personal space. He basically saw the third biggest room of the house and went “mine now” and Balth had no issue letting him have it (hard to say no when Vinnie’s eyes shine like that).

- He already had a memory room in his old apartment.

- Basically, Vinnie brings back souvenirs from his missions, along with pictures he took, and put them on display. For more information, I made a post about it a while ago, so check it out if you want info on it.

And side note : I learned more about ADHD and autism later on and found out that the correct word for Vinnie’s passion for animals is a special interest, not a hyperfixation. The main difference between the two terms is how long your interest last. The reason I used “hyperfixation” in my post is because 1. I didn’t know that “special interest” was a term that existed and 2. people with ADHD kept talking about having hyperfixations and most people see Vinnie as having ADHD. So yeah, my bad for using the wrong term. And while I won’t change the current text from my post, especially with someone in the notes correcting me (I don’t want them to look like an idiot), I’ll definitely add a few words at the end of the post about it.

 - This is where Vinnie spends most of his time when at home, trying to keep the room in the best condition.

- There’s a window in the room but Vinnie condemned it in case some of his souvenirs were sensitive to the sunlight.

- The room is made entirely of shelves, with like four-five rows on the same wall. The shelves are either integrated into the walls or they’re floating because future. In any cases, there’s nothing around the shelves, it’s just shelves with stuff on it.

- When you enter the room, one of the rows of shelves next to you has all the animal-related stuff he gathered before starting a relationship with Balth. The rest of the room can have a few animal-themed objects but the pictures tend to be more linked to him and Balth.

- Likewise, when you enter the room, on the shelf you’re immediately facing, there’s a miniature recreation of their wedding altar with their wedding picture in its center. The miniature is made out of the future equivalent of papier-mâché and the altar is themed around time-travel with objects from all kinds of time-periods and cultures. And for those who might ask regarding the picture : Vinnie has a black suit and carries the bouquet while Balth has a white suit. Both have a hat that’s basically Balth’s usual hat (with the Professor-Time goggles, because themed wedding) but colored like their respective suit.

    Balthazar’s office :

- The room has quite a few libraries but this is mostly decorations. Basically, this room is more of an 1800th century study than anything, especially a rich/royal study. Yeah, for some reason I see Balth as having an office that’s just “rich 1800th century” aesthetic. I think it’s from the headcanon of him being a runaway prince 🤔.

- So yeah. The bookcases are vintage, the piano is your usual black piano, the armchairs are vintage and tbh Balth almost never uses them because he’d rather read in the living room, and the desk is vintage, though the stuff on the desk is futuristic. Balth is up to date with the technology he’s using to work, he just likes the older aesthetic for the rest.

- On his desk, despite literally living with the guy, Balth has a framed picture of Vinnie (again, I want the stubborn gay disaster to be sappy from time to time, with his love language being small touches and attention to details like for example being able to quickly see the kinds of foods Vinnie like the most so that when he’s in a bad mood, Balth can get him that specific food to make it better ; or learning Vinnie’s body language to know when he’s upset or bothered by something).

  - Balth mostly spends his time here to make the reports on their missions or work some administration stuff when needed. When he isn’t at his desk, he’s there to play the piano.

And yes, I throw out the window that line from “Backwards to School Night” that indicates Vinnie doesn’t know about Balth playing piano but tbh I ignore or question quite a few things from this episode such as : the line indicating that Vinnie and Balth don’t live together in their time-period since Balth doesn’t know Vinnie’s weekend habits ; the line about how the ray thing age you down to 90% your current age and yet baby Vinnie seems younger than the parents despite his adult self seeming older; the fact that Melissa read a book 16 times in the span of 6 minutes ; the fact that it’s called a “age regressor ray” and not a “age regressor ray-inator” (seriously, I am the only one always expecting Vinnie to say “inator” and being disappointed when he doesn’t ?).

- The couple absolutely sing songs together with Balth playing the piano. Or at least Vinnie would sing a song in the middle of the living-room and have Balth be annoyed by it, only for Vinnie to hear Balth play the same song on the piano later and join him.

    Bathroom :

- Not much to say here. It’s a bathroom. It’s futuristic-looking. The mirror is a cabinet. The tub is round. The bin comes in and out of the wall. The clothes drier also irons the clothes. The toilet is glued to the wall. The walls are dark gray or dark blue or at least a darker color so that Vinnie doesn’t have to dim the lights to the lowest level when he’s showering. There are also several little lights along with a main one so that Vinnie can light the small ones instead of getting a headache due to the brighter light. During lazy/slow days, Balth would take baths instead of showers (and Vinnie would want to join him to make out). Balth may or may not sing in the shower (Vinnie definitely does). That’s pretty much it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    Guest/Storage room :

- Only used as a guest room when one or several members of the Dakota family are visiting the states and end up in the Tri-State-Area. So for 90% of the time, the room is used as storage.

- Bed’s not that big and very “squary”. Might or might not be floating.

- It’s mostly random junk that they don’t know where to put and don’t want to get rid of, like some stuff they got from their missions but that Vinnie doesn’t want in his room or some old things they want to give at a garage sale or that one Professor-Time body-pillow that Balth refuses to let go of while Vinnie just wants to trash the thing. The body-pillow being in the storage room in a junkpile was their compromise on the issue. Also, whenever someone might stay in the room, Balth makes sure there’s no way they will find the body-pillow (his sister in-law Bettie would never let him live it down).

- Not much to say here either aside from that.

    Master bedroom (the room in which the proportions are way bigger than the rest of the house because I have no idea what I’m doing) :

- I described the room quickly in my fic “nightmares” but yeah basically the room has several posters and pictures related to their interests, along with a bookshelf full of animal encyclopedias, time-travel facts, history books, Professor-Time fantasy books etc. There are also albums, whether it be family pictures or album of the two of them.

- Like for the living-room, there can definitely be more than what I described/pictured here. I’m just really bad at imagining the kind of stuff people would have in their bedrooms related to their interests. And speaking of which : at some point, there was the aquarium that Vinnie mentions in “Time Out”.

- Unlike the other rooms in which the windows have roller blinds (apparently that’s the english word for it ?), this one has curtains on top of it because Balth likes to open the window in the morning but he doesn’t want Vinnie to hurt his eyes. So with curtains, he can open them enough to light the room but not enough for the light to reach Vinnie’s face.

- The bed is pretty classic for a futuristic bed but with round edges and these two idiots definitely go crazy with the sheets design (animals, food, Professor-Time, past time-periods, stuff like that). Also, the bed is “open”. By that I mean that, if you look at futuristic designs, there tends to be some roof thing above the bed and linked to it. They wouldn’t have that.

- The nightstands are floating cubes.

- “Dennis’ chair” is just some random old wooden chair where Dennis stays most of the time. Balth almost never takes him during his missions and Dennis is a comfort object that Balth mostly talks to when sitting on the bed, movie nights aside. So the bear stays in the bedroom.

- The bookshelf would also be made of wood.

- The wardrobe is futuristic, with doors that can open by themselves with sensory detection. Also, unlike what that poor “drawing” shows, the wardrobe is “taller” than it is “larger”.

- The armchair is an egg chair.

  - They sleep

- They spoon

- Balth is the big spoon because 1. he’s taller and 2. he grew up sleeping while embracing a teddy bear and old habits die hard.

- When Balth goes to sleep or wakes up, he can’t help but play with Vinnie’s hair and give the small man a few kisses, feeling satisfaction in seeing his husband smile or try to pull away while laughing.

- Vinnie sleeps on the side closest to the window while Balth sleeps on the side nearest to Dennis.

- Balth’s nightstand has an alarm clock that’s basically just a holographic square with numbers on it, while Vinnie has an album or some random animal trinket. Vinnie’s alarm clock is not feeling Balth’s warmth against him. But if Vinnie has to use an actual alarm, the sound would either be some old-fashioned song or an animal noise (is this starting to get too much insistence on the “animal-loving” side of him ?)

- While Balth likes to read in the living-room, Vinnies likes it better to chill in the bedroom when reading. Also, during weekends and vacation days, Balth would sometimes read in bed before sleeping (yeah for some reason I really like the idea of Balth being a reader. I think it has to do with him being old or british ??? Weird brain is weird. And besides, if Balth reads, it would most likely be science fiction related to Professor Time). Vinnie uses this time as an excuse to cuddle.

- They have themed pajamas. Balth mostly has Professor-Time stuff (clocks, Heinz or Perry’s faces etc) while Vinnie has mostly animal-themed or food-themed pajamas.

- Vinnie sometimes sleeps naked in the summer. Balth is still trying to figure out how he feels about that.

- Random headcanon regarding Dennis : while he belongs to Balth who keeps him close when in doubt in order to vent or when he wants to get comfortable somewhere, I actually like to believe that, between the two, Vinnie is the one who talks the most to Dennis, mostly because Vinnie would just enter the bedroom and casually greet the bear, or he and Balth would have a dumb argument and Vinnie would playfully tell Dennis “Can you believe that guy ?” while pointing at Balth. Just, Vinnie being Vinnie and having random one-sided conversations with the bear.

And a little cute thing : while Vinnie really just talked to Dennis because why not, seeing the guy like the teddy bear so much would actually make Balth feel better about himself. I like to believe that grown-up men having plushies would still be seen as a ridiculous thing by most people (because toxic masculinity) and Balth got the habit of hiding Dennis when he was still trying to find the right guy for him. So seeing Vinnie have no issue whatsoever with the teddy bear and even liking him would definitely help Balth’s confidence, along with warming his heart.

- And since this post is all about headcanons : two things about phones and these two being sappy that have nothing to do with houses.

1. One day, Balth left his phone on a table and Vinnie decided to take a selfie with it because why not. After seeing that, Balth acted frustrated but ended up putting the pic as his phone background. Ever since, Balth’s phone background is a picture of Vinnie. The most recent one is from “We’re Going to the Zoo” with a picture of Vinnie holding squirrels in his arms while a third one is coming out of his pistachios-filled pants. The pic on the phone is a closeup, only showing Vinnie’s head and upper body. And for those who like angst, I’ll let you imagine how he must have felt having this as his phone background during the rogue arc.

2. Vinnie’s (numeric) phone password is 2703, aka march 27, the date of his wedding anniversary. The day is put first and the month second because Europe. Also, during busy weeks, this would be a good way for Vinnie to remember the anniversary.

(fun fact : I was trying to come up with scenarios for fics when I ended up thinking about Vinnie’s password and that number came to mind. So I just went “guess that’s their wedding date now”)

[dean-you-assbutt-cas-loves-you]

I saw in your tags that there’s some old destiel fic you like on ffn. Do you have any recs ? :)

omg I haven’t been on there in years! like last time I read anything on there was like in 2014 lmao xD

32 fics total - I just checked and all of them are still up...there’s like 30+ more that I bookmarked that isn’t on the list cuz I’m not sure if they’re destiel fics or not so I gotta re-read them

all the ones below are fics that I’ve recced before in the past

1. All Angels Need Their Wings - RATING: NC-17 | LENGTH: 29,784 (2012)

Dean never thought that Castiel would ever return. And when he did, he came in a very unexpected way, a very horrifying way. SLASH Castiel/Dean. Wing-Kink. Takes place in season 7. AU.

2. Heart Trouble - RATING: NC-17 | LENGTH: 74,320 (2011)

Dean's having a harder and harder time of denying what he feels for a certain blue-eyed friend of his. And it's making him a little ornery, and a lot confused.

3. It Hurts - RATING: NC-17 | LENGTH: 29,963 (2013)

Inspired by the S9 Trailer Cas had watched the angels fall and with them, his self worth. Now human facing the challenges of navigating mortality he also tries to find a place for himself in this new world. It is a hope he has to find without the Winchesters, without Dean. So now he runs, from both Heaven, Hell and from Dean. 

4. Small Problem - RATING: NC-17 | LENGTH: 13,310 (2011)

A cursed artifact has made Castiel miniature, it's amusing for the Winchesters at first until they realize he might stay that way forever. Slash Dean/Castiel Please R&R

5 My Broken Angel - RATING: M | LENGTH: 24,999 (2010)

When Castiel disappears from his vessel, Dean is concerned. But when Castiel reappears and seems to avoid him, Dean is heartbroken. Set mid-season 5. 

6. A Hand - RATING: M | LENGTH: 23,474 (2010)

Dean/Cas, multichapter, slight AU. Dean's busy trying to re-soulify his brother, but Cas needs help. Maybe it's time Dean gave it to him. Ch. 15: Dean glared indignantly. "I find the term 'lovebirds' to be offensive. We prefer to be called 'sex-falcons.'" 

7. Saving Grace - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 38,602 (2010)

With everything that was going wrong in Dean's life, it took him a while to realize that the person close to him that really needed the most help was Castiel. 

8. Candy - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 98,068 (2013)

The Fall from Heaven changed everything. The supernatural no longer hidden. Angels roaming the planet. Sam and Dean's immediate concerns were on a smaller scale. What do you do with the former King of Hell? Where is Castiel?... Destiel/Mute!Human!Cas/Angst!Dean

9. Dude, Dean Looks Like a Lady - RATING: M | LENGTH: 20,774 *gen/pre-slash* (2013)

Sam's good, Cas has been found, and demons everywhere seem to be on hiatus. Seems like things are looking up for Team Free Will that is until Dean wakes up with his very own vagina anyway. Warnings: Fem!Dean, Destiel, female masturbation and S8 spoilers.

10. Evil Intent, Trials of Love, & Finding My Angel - RATING: NC-17 | LENGTH: 36,729, 70,453, & 59,941 *rape, graphic torture, violence* (2009)

Anna rapes Castiel and uses a method that torments him more than anything imaginable. WARNING: Rape and Castiel/Dean makes sense when you read it . If you don't like then don't read!

11. Cascade - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 44,626 (2013)

"And if you fall as Lucifer fell, you fall in flames!" An 8x23 coda. 

12. Count The Cracks, Hear The Shatters, Feel The Insanities - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 44,626 *gen/pre-slash* (2013)

They've walked miles on gravel roads that led to hell and back but the journey never quite ends. This is the story of Castiel and the Winchesters after the angels fell from heaven. Post Season 8. 

13. Damn Straight & Wait Wait Wait - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: about 21,000 (2010)

Humorous Cas/Dean, with multiple POVs. Slight AU. Fluffy. Ch. 5: Sam sat in the Impala in the motel parking lot, praying that three and a half hours at the library had been long enough.

14. Entertaining Angels - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 43,659 *gen/pre-slash* (2008)

A strange boy shows up at Dean and Sam’s motel room. Maybe he needs help, or maybe he’s there to help them—they can’t quite tell. Spoilers through 4.10. Not an OC. 

15. Happy Friggin’ Valentine’s Day - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 22,771 (2010)

SLASH. It all started with Dean's perfectly healthy hatred of frivilous holidays and a much-coveted sack of dust. Poor Castiel doesn't fully understand 'romance' to begin with, and this crash course is most unwelcome. 

16. I’m Just a Love Machine - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 29,200 (2011)

The Impala finally gets the chance to love Dean back. The problem is, Castiel seems to be in its way. 

17. It’s The Great Destiel Shipper, Sam Winchester - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 49,641 (2012)

What's Sam really doing all that time on the computer? Fangirling. Over Chuck's Supernatural books. Now Wincest might be a bit too much to deal with, but Destiel he might be able to get on board with... Especially after being around the two people involved for three days straight. 

18. Pain in the Head - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 78,771 *character death* (2011)

It started out slow. "Since when do angels have headaches?" "Since they become human." Established Dean/Cas. Sort of AU. PG-13. Complete. 

19. Sleep in Heavenly Peace - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 45,517 *christmas fic* (2013)

Dean wants to have a nice, peaceful Christmas for once, but it seems like the universe won't let him. Dean/Castiel. Post-8.08 (Hunteri Heroici) AU. First in "Holidays With the Winchesters are Always Fun." 

20. The Shattered One - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 94,021 *grace mpreg* (2012)

When it struck Castiel, it dropped him out of the sky. He set down the first place he could find. He stood in a field in Switzerland, swaying on his feet and staring down at his body, dazed by what it had just done.

21. This Cupid Isn’t Stupid - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 41,572 (2012)

Dean receives a shock when he wakes up to discover Castiel has returned. Why is the angel suddenly back? Why have his powers dimmed? And.. Why are he and Dean joined together by an invisible rope!

22. Wild Horses, Cas - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 23,505 (2013)

(S8 Spoilers (story is set in S9), Sickfic! Destiel, Minor Sabriel). When Cas comes down with a bad case of Pneumonia it leaves Dean feeling more protective over his friend than ever, but will it also lead to Dean's admittance of his feelings towards his friend? 

23. Wrong - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 51,384 (2010)

Angels are not supposed to drop out of the sky into motel rooms, broken and beaten. They're not supposed to bleed like that. It was all wrong. 

24. The Reluctant Contestant - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 50,502 (2012)

AU When Gabriel is hired as a new host for a dating show, Cas has no choice but to follow his brother along as part of the camera crew. Forced at the last minute to be a contestant, he is shocked when Dean Winchester continually refuses to eliminate him. 

25. The Ugly Duckling - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 81,676 (2012)

Castiel: a nerdy, skinny thing with a crush on the the most popular guy in class. Being unpopular isn't easy and it's worse when the homophobic school figures him out. A small struggle to be noticed by his crush is turned into a huge struggle for himself and his dignity. But bullying can get the better of anyone. Slash. Destiel rated M for later chapters. 

26. Nameless - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 77,882 (2013)

AU. Everyone has the name of their soulmate written on their wrist at birth. Well, everyone except Dean Winchester. Complete. 

27. Cufflinks - RATING: M | LENGTH: 61,845 (2012)

The world is full of creatures that prey on humans. It is up to 'Hunters' to fight against the dark. Lucky Hunters rely on the help of angels they have bound to their service. Sam and Dean may be good Hunters, but they have yet to capture an angel. One day, Sam finds an angel and seizes the opportunity to bind the angel to himself. Little did they know what they were getting into. 

28. Angel Training - RATING: M | LENGTH: 95,700, Angel Training 2: Save Us - RATING: M | LENGTH: 76,888, & Angel Training 3: Uprising - RATING: M | LENGTH: 89,512 (2011)

In a world where angels are common and the most privileged or skilled people are able to own one; the world's angelic hierarchy is about to change when Dean Winchester receives a wild and recently caught angel.

29. Chasing Your Shadow - RATING: M | LENGTH: 92,077 (2012)

The prophecy says that when Castiel turns twenty-three winters old, a stranger will come into his life and bring a lot of suffering. But do prophecies always come true? Demon Dean/human Castiel AU 

30. The Holiday - RATING: M | LENGTH: 32,088 (2011)

Castiel and Sam are unlucky in both life and love, so they swap houses for the holidays. Both find the experience highly...interesting. Dean/Castiel Sam/Gabriel

31. And In Your Arms I Shall Find Shelter- RATING: M | LENGTH: 33,824 (2012)

Dean Winchester is a long forgotten painter who suddenly receives an order for a painting from a rich man - Crowley. He is about to start painting when Castiel - his personal reaper visits him. The main question is: Will Castiel give Dean enough time to finish the painting? 

32. Jar of Hearts - RATING: PG-13 | LENGTH: 127,192 (2013)

February being the supposed 'month of love' people seem to forget that it's also one of the coldest times of the year. Valentine's Day themed events in a cafe turned bar is how Dean managed the courage to speak to the locally famous singer and somehow score a date, a relationship, and a man he didn't deserve out of the deal. Destiel college/uniAU some Sabriel 

[bl--ankhaeji]

Five Months(yuta)

Pairing ~ Yuta x Reader

Genre ~ A little bit of angst, fluff, humor if you can find it and bittersweet

Warning ~ uhh I don’t really have any 

A/N ~ so for this i felt like my writing changed a little. like so far I haven’t written anything with this type of atmosphere or theme so it was something new and I really enjoyed writing this. I also want to say thank you to my beta readers Xiami and Mylin. 

W. Count ~ 2.4k

Hii, before we get into the story. Wanted to let you guys know that this is my fic for the Secret Santa collab that @neoculturechristmas held. @neonun-au I am your secret santa 😊 or 🎅🏽anon. I am sorry I didn’t talk to you that much in your asks, but when we did I really enjoyed it. I hope you enjoy.  

On to the story

You and Yuta have been broken up for around five months now. Over what, you truly don’t even remember. Some petty argument got out of hand and it caused you guys to break up with each other in the heat of anger. Usually when things like that happen the couple gets back together within a week and everything is fine, but sad to say that’s not what happened with you and Yuta. 

You both were entirely too stubborn for your own good, and with both of you refusing to even so much as speak to the other you managed to stay broken up for five months. And that’s what led you to where you are right now. Stranded on a snowy mountain trail with said ex. 

The sound of snow crunching underneath your boots was deafening,but even this noise couldn't drown out the sound of your thoughts. You ask yourself, how did what was supposed to be a quick stroll on a beautiful snowy trail to clear your mind end up becoming a meet up with your ex?

Oh, maybe it’s because life is a bitch that loves to fuck with you. What are the odds that you and your friends plan a Christmas trip to the same resort as Yuta and his friends? And what are the odds that your cabins are right next to each other? And what are the fucking odds that you both picked the exact same time to step out for a walk on the same trail, and you both manage to get lost? 

“Yuta, I really don’t think you know where the hell you’re going.” You say halting your steps, the icy tone in your words almost rivaling the cold outside. You both have been lost and aimlessly walking around for the past 20 minutes and the temperature continued to drop as it was getting later and later into the night. Yuta swore he knew the way back, but you were cold and tired and seriously doubting this ability. 

When you first realized you were lost, you tried to retrace your steps only to find out the consistently falling snow had already covered them, making it look as if no one had even been there. At first you thought, maybe this was a sign, an opportunity for you and Yuta to rekindle your relationship, but you quickly realized how wrong you were. 

Yuta’s hand reached up to his head, “Just, give me a minute okay. I know how to get back, we're almost there.” He said as he continued to pace forward. 

“Yuta, stop! Just fucking stop and admit that you don’t know where the fuck we are or where we are going! This is just like you, I see you haven’t changed in these last five months.” You scoff looking away as you wrap your arms around your waist, trying to generate some warmth.

“And what the fuck is that supposed to mean, huh?!” A fiery Yuta inquires, turning around to face you. 

“It means that even with our breakup, you still can’t admit when you’re wrong and don’t know something. You keep pushing at it, not listening, feeling like you have to know it all on your own.” The words fell out of your mouth unforgivingly, packing a punch in every single syllable. Finishing your statement, you roll your eyes, shifting your weight to your right side. 

“Wow, isn’t that fucking rich coming from you. I’m not the one who bottles everything up and whenever they feel is convenient enough decides to blow up on her boyfriend for no reason. Just like the one that broke us up, this argument was started by you. So don’t act like I’m the only problem.” Just like Yuta said, you may have started the argument but he seemed intent on finishing it. 

The cold was suddenly unbearable, and all you wanted right now was to just go to sleep in a warm bed. No words were spoken after that, and like that you and Yuta just pushed past it, continuing to walk forward and ignoring the venomous words you both spoke in hopes of forgetting this event. This really was no different than five months ago. 

The want to cry your heart out was almost all consuming, but you didn’t let a single tear fall. In hopes of not appearing weak and also because you believed with your whole heart that if you were to cry right, now the tears would turn to ice on your face instantly from the cold. So you kept your head down, trying to not think about where you actually were. 

You were completely zoned out until you heard, “Y/n, we’ve made it.” Raising your head, you see a wooden cabin in the distance. Finally, you thought, it was starting to get dark. You instantly start sprinting to the cabin. “Wait up.” Yuta said as he started to run behind you. The sounds of crushed snow and huffed breaths filled your ears. 

Upon getting closer to the cabin you realize something is off. Looking through the uncovered window on the door, you realize that this wasn’t the cabin that either of you currently occupied. You could tell not only from the emptiness in the house but also from the lack of lights and the quiet that rang through the air. “Yuta, I don’t know where we are but this isn’t either one of our cabins.” You tell him through bated breaths, your teeth slightly chattering, looking as he slows down until he stops in front of you, also out of breath. 

“Huh? What do you mean?” He asks as he tries the doorknob only to see that it’s locked.

“I mean that this isn’t where we’re staying. It’s just a random cabin in the woods.” Yuta swears loudly at the revelation. You both are stranded at some random cabin at night while it’s snowing and almost below freezing outside. “What the fuck are we gonna do? We could barely manage to find our way here. There's no way we’ll be able to navigate in the dark and find our way back.” 

“We have no choice, we have to break in. Our clothes and shoes are almost soaked through from the melted snow and I can practically hear your teeth chattering. Also, I’m hungry.” At the mention of food your stomach chooses now to rumble loudly almost as if agreeing with Yuta’s statement. 

A small chuckle leaves Yuta’s lips, “Don’t worry, I won’t let you go hungry.” He proceeds to take off the flannel he has underneath his snow jacket and wraps it around his hand making a fist. He lifts his fist getting ready to punch the glass before you stop him, your hands coming around fist. 

“Woah! Stop right there, we can’t just go vandalizing this random cabin hell we’re already breaking and entering. Just step aside, I got this.” You tell the man as you push him aside. You slightly tilt over, surveying the type of lock on the door and inwardly rejoice at the fact that there’s no bolt lock and it’s just a regular handle lock which seems to be quite loose. 

Good thing you brought your wallet in case you went to the convenience store. Taking out an old card, you proceed with breaking into the cabin. Sliding it in between the door handle and the frame, a smile takes over your face when you feel the door give and start to open. 

Standing straight, you look towards Yuta while inwardly praying the owners don’t have a silent alarm for the cabin. “Woah, that was kinda hot. When did you learn to do that?” He questions, leaning against the wall of the cabin watching you with predatory eyes. 

Something stirs in your stomach at the look on his face. Deciding to ignore it, you just say, “A lady never tells.” and waltz into the cabin with a wink. You hear a low whistle flow from his mouth as he follows you into the currently uninhabited cabin.    

You look around the room searching for a heater, preferably gas when the room suddenly gets flooded by light. “We have electricity, so that’s good.” Yuta says before he makes his way to the kitchen, “Now let's look for some food.” You hear a couple cabinets open and close before Yuta finds some canned food. Luckily, there’s three cans of beef soup that you guys can heat up and eat. 

Yuta gets the food going and you continue your search for a heater, finding it near the back of the room. You quickly turn it on in order to warm yourself up, while proceeding to take off your wet jacket and boots. It was a good thing the wood floor was covered with a rug. Yuta calls your name, telling you the food was ready, and you walk to the kitchen reluctantly, leaving behind the warm rug underneath your feet. 

You take the first sip of your soup, the warmth it radiates heating you up internally as it travels down your throat, and part of you feels relieved. The prospect of freezing to death wasn’t knocking at your door anymore and you had food in your system, but you and Yuta eat your soup in silence. Though the room was draped in a comfortable warmth and you guys weren’t yelling at each other you still couldn’t help but feel like something between you two just wasn’t right. 

After washing the dishes, you make your way back to the main room, tuning in on the softness of your sock clad feet padding against the wood floor. You spot Yuta standing near the heater and you notice that he had draped your wet jackets above the heater, possibly so they would be dry by the time you guys left in the morning. 

Lowering yourself to the rug, you sit down criss cross, busying yourself by braiding the tassels on the sides of the rug. You hear Yuta clear his throat as he sits across from you on the spacious rug. “Do you want to play a game?” He asks you looking up from his hands to gouge your reaction. 

“Sure.” you reply, waiting for him to tell you the game. He replies, telling you he wants to play          questions, and you prepare yourself for the possible shit show that might ensue. 

“I’ll go first. Are you still cold?” His simple question takes you by surprise. That’s not even close to what you expected for him to ask.

“Yea, just a little though.” You reply honestly shrugging your shoulders, “My turn.” What did you want to ask? you thought to yourself. You didn’t want to lower the atmosphere with a question about your relationship just yet, so you also decided to play it safe. “Are you still hungry?” 

“You know I am.” He quips a little smile playing at his lips. “Next question. Since you’re still cold, can I cuddle you right now?” Your eyes grow larger at his question and you can’t deny that the thought of it made your heart race a little. A slow nod is all the answer Yuta needs before he is scooting over behind you wrapping his arms around your torso. 

You never got to tell Yuta how good this hairstyle was on him. The bleached hair with lilac highlights fit him so well, and that’s all you could think as his head finds a home on the side of your neck and his semi long hair tickles the side of your face. You’re so focused on the sensation of his body against yours filtering his warmth to you that you don’t notice that it is now your turn for a question. 

“Y/n, it’s been your turn for a while.” Yuta speaks as his warm breath dances on your skin.

“Why have you not tried to mend things with me?” You don’t know if it’s just your curiosity or if it’s your brain trying to ruin the moment so you don’t get hurt but you decide it’s time to bring up your relationship.

“Well you can’t say you’ve tried all that hard either. It goes both ways y/n-” 

“Actually,” You interrupt him, “I did try, once. It was three months into our breakup and I was tired of missing you and missing us and I wanted it all to be over and to just put this behind us. So I went over to your house to mend things and I saw some girl leaving, and before you say I jumped to conclusions, I saw her kiss you.” Averting your eyes to your sweaty palms, you watch yourself rub them against your knees. You can feel the telltale sting in your eyes signifying future tears.

“That- Y/n no it’s really not what you think.” You feel Yuta’s arms wrap tighter around you. “That girl was a project partner and she came over so we could work on it, but she had heard that me and you broke up so she thought it was okay to try and shoot her shot by kissing me. I didn’t kiss back, nor did I enjoy it. I even ended up doing the rest of the project on my own.” 

You turn to look at Yuta to see if he’s telling the truth and you see no hints of falsity. Instantly you feel stupid, and you go to look back at the floor until Yuta grabs your chin, forcing you to look at him.  

“My turn. If I were to tell you that I was willing to change for us right now would you believe me?” His eyes burn intensely as he waits for your reply.

“If I were to tell you that you don’t have to change for us would you believe me?” Was your reply and you could see the hope forming in his irises

“If I were to tell you I still love you-” His words fall off as your lips meet his and they become occupied with something else. 

Five months. It had been five months since you heard his voice. It had been five months since you felt him against you. Five months since you tasted his lips. Five months since he had last declared his love. 

If you could go back in time and make it to where you never had to suffer that drought without him, you would. But for now you just wanted to enjoy the time you would get from today forward.   

[jawabear]

Snow (Frankie Morales x Reader)

Not My GIF

A/N: happy Christmas Eve everyone! This was a request from the lovely @phoenixhalliwell I hope this is what you were thinking of, I think I may have changed it a little bit. But I hope you enjoy it any. Sorry for any mistakes. Stay safe.

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: fem!reader, soft!Frankie, Frankie is an anxious boy, but we love him, nothing else much, Pedro Pascal comes with his own warning

Summary: As you get older, snow becomes less fun, but sometimes good things can happen

The one thing she learnt as she got older is that snow is not fun, it’s an inconvenience. When you’re a kid it’s the greatest thing in the world, it’s fun, magical and means you get a day off school. But as you get older, trying to navigate through the white mess and not fall over is too much fuss.

When she woke up and saw the fresh layer of snow across the floor outside her small house she was initially excited. That child like joy bubbling inside her at the exciting though of getting to make the first foot print in the fresh snow. She couldn’t help but giggle with giddy excitement as she jumped around outside for ten minutes probably getting weird looks from her neighbours.

But as the day dragged on, that excitement dwindled down to almost nothing as she trudged through the slipper streets in search of anywhere that was open and could sell her what she was after. Her bother had very helpfully called the morning before and sprung on her that he and his wife would be coming to stay with her for the holidays. A week before Christmas.

So she was pretty annoyed at this point. She loved her brother of course and was excited to be spending Christmas with him but she would’ve liked a little more notice so she could prepare things.

So far her search for her items had been unsuccessful. His wife was very much a picky eater and there wasn’t much that she did eat. (Y/N) was sent a very specific list of things to buy, and it was near impossible to find.

The day wasn’t going great.

After about an hour of looking for things on the list and coming up empty she decided to give it a miss and try again another day. So she went into her favourite coffee shop and brought a festive themed hot chocolate.

She held the cup tightly in her hands to warm them as she left the shop and began to walk towards the park on the way home. The park was a supposed short cut, but also it was less crowded then the streets. She was so invested in the warm deliciousness of her drink that she didn’t notice some one walking towards her.

And the next thing she knew, she was on the floor, her drink falling from her hands.

“Oh my god!” The person exclaimed in a panicked voice “I’m so sorry!” They took her arm gently in their hands and helped her to her feet “are you okay? Are you hurt?”

“U-Uh...no. I’m okay” she said brushing the snow off her backside. It was a man who had run into her and helped her. He looked down and her heart seemed to sink as she looked at her delicious hot chocolate now spilled on the floor. She wasn’t angry as such, she was just...sad. She couldn’t really be bothered to get angry with who ever had run into her, she was too fed up.

“Shit” he swore under his breath as he bent down and picked up the now empty cup. It was then that she looked to see who it was who had all but ruined her day completely. But seeing who it was, it seemed her day had gotten better.

He was quite attractive and had such kind and gentle brown eyes that were full of apology as he looked between her and the empty cup. “It’s alright” she said as she took it from him and put it into the bin “it...wasn’t all that nice anyway” she lied to make him feel better.

“Still, let me get you another one” he offered.

“Oh no! It’s fine. Really” she laughed softly as she waved off his offer. She did want to accept because she wanted to spend more time with him because he intrigued her. But she felt it would be a little strange to accept the offer of someone she has literally just met. Although he was the one offering.

“Please” he said “it will make me feel better if I get you another one” he looked genuinely upset but what had happened and she left bad declining his kind offer.

“Well...if you really insist” she said quietly with a sheepish smile.

The short walk back to the coffee shop was slightly awkward and pretty much silent. But what were they meant to say to each other?

But he spoke suddenly “I...I’m Frankie by the way” he said.

“O-Oh. (Y/N)” she smiled. When they arrived at the coffee shop it was extremely busy. The line was practically out of the door. “It’s way too busy” she said as she lightly touched Frankie’s arm. She quickly pulled it away and joined her hands in front of her. “I’ll um...I’ll just come back some when else. But thank you anyway. It was very kind of you to offer”

“I Uh..yeah..okay. I’m still really sorry” he said as they both began walking back to the park. “Will you...do you think I could buy you one some other time?” He asked incredibly quietly staring at the floor as they walked.

“Y-You mean like..a-a date?” She couldn’t quite believe what she was hearing. But she wasn’t about to decline his offer.

“Y-Yeah...unless of course you’re seeing someone in which case forget I said anything-“

“No no! It’s fine” she said stopping his rambling “I would..love to get a drink with you sometime.. Um, let me give you my number”

He was quick to pull out his phone and unlock it for her. She typed in her number under her name and handed it back with a smile.

“So um...text me when you’re free” she said.

“Y-Yeah. Yeah I will. Um...I’ll see you some when then” he said nervously.

“Yeah. See you some when” she said back. “But in case we don’t see each other before, have a great Christmas Frankie”

“And you (Y/N)” she smiled brightly too him before they walked their separate ways.

24/12/20

[ggukcangetit]

key

* indicates NC-17 rating with darker themes

** indicates 18+ rating with mature themes

drabbles: ~1500 words

one shots: full length fics 2k words or more

series: broken up into 2 or more parts/chapters

Drabbles

on my pillow**

summary: you see him. you are lost for words. 6 years pass. you see him again. you are lost for words again. stuff follows.

tiny lights, tiny lies

summary: you aren’t sure when exactly your best friend’s brother went from being an oddly annoying set of broad shoulders to the shoulders you frequently fell asleep against.

One Shots

Counterfeit Culture **

summary: for as long as you can remember, you’ve always known right from wrong, good from bad, and woke from entitled/ignorant. but when you continue to cross paths with Kim Seokjin - the apparent antithesis of everything you believe in - certain walls begin to crumble. and over time, you come to realise that the world isn’t black and white, first impressions can be misleading, and that you are just as guilty as each person you’ve judged so harshly. realisation brings acceptance, and maybe, just maybe, acceptance can bring something more.

OR

that time you judged every single person around you and it turned out you were being a total dickhead

Cruel Summer**

[sequel to Counterfeit Culture]

...it's new, the shape of your body...It's blue... 

the feeling I've got...and it's ooh, whoa, oh...It's a cruel summer

a guide to having sex with your utterly gorgeous boyfriend while navigating a few snags in the process where one of snags happens to be your gorgeous boyfriend

Name of the Game**

[Anastasia AU] (part of the Wish Upon A Star collab)

summary: The Hotel -Strange, The Manager - Far Too Charming, The Situation - Dire, The One in Trouble - You.

Clothes Maketh A Fan

coming soon...

Drabbles

pink & grey

summary: it isn’t just opposites that attract. sometimes opposites aren’t that different. much like you and your neighbor.

Coming soon…

Drabbles

Namjoon-ing in the rain

summary: You hate the rain but your best friend, Namjoon, doesn’t feel the same.

One shots

All I want for Christmas is- who?!**

summary: Penpals, a misunderstanding, and a Christmas party full of way too many handsome strangers. Throw in a bonsai and some extremely sharp Christmas ornaments, and that’s all you could ever want for Christmas. Right?!

Royal Flush**

summary: your kingdom’s newest prisoner is giving you sleepless nights.

Coming soon…

Coming soon…

Had it been another day...

[Princess and the Frog AU] (part of the Wish Upon A Star collab)

summary: When the universe hated you enough to pair you with the most obnoxious guy in your class, for a project that would decide your future but had no such implications for him.

Drabbles

please... love me

summary: emotions are difficult and intense. which you find out the hard way. but sometimes, they can lead to something beautiful.

One Shots

Tomorrow

summary: At the beginning of your third year of your PhD program, you didn’t expect many changes. Until the new PhD cohort started classes, and jeon jungkook became part of your group of friends. 

after-hours **

summary: you’ve been working as a middle school maths teacher for almost a year now. things are going well, until... the school recruits a new english literature teacher to replace the soon-to-be retired mrs. meyers. it’s no secret that you’ve always had a thing for shakespeare, but nothing can explain your body’s reaction to mr. jeon and his literary knowledge. and it all comes to head one friday, after-hours.

The Unbearable Lightness of Being... Something More - JK birthday special

Part 1 Chocolates & Laundry Do Not Mix

summary: when your best friend, namjoon, asks if a junior from his business ventures class can live with you till his lease comes through, you don’t think much about it. But one month with jeon jungkook proves to be extremely difficult because of how little the boy says but how much he seems to topple over without much effort.

Part 2 Crime & Punishment**

summary: no one messes with your stock of snacks. absolutely no one. not even a very attractive jungkook who handles the repercussions really well.

Part 3 If the Bra Fits**

summary: jungkook knows you hate it when he pops into your apartment to borrow something, but in the 2 years that you’ve known each other, that hasn’t deterred him much. But one day when he manages to (accidentally) ruin your favorite bra while raiding through your emergency snack supply, he knows that he’s fucked. With only a brand name to help him on his search, jungkook spends the next 48 hours buying all the bras that look even remotely like the one he ruined. The only problem is - how would he figure out which was the correct size without asking you?

Coming soon...

The Fourth Unforgivable 

[Lion King AU] (part of the Wish Upon A Star collab)

summary: Seven years is a long time. Enough to bring about many changes - new laws, dangerous associations, and the return of the one you had forced yourself to forget.

Series

Dreamcatchers*

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |

summary: DI Jeon didn’t need a new partner. Unfortunately, his superiors felt otherwise; especially considering the extremely high-profile murder that had just taken place in the port city. Recent transfer, DI Choi Yuri finds herself confronted with a new cityscape, unfamiliar people, a hostile partner, and a homicide that is certain to bring back unpleasant memories.

Game Changer

[Hogwarts AU] (part of the BTS meets Hogwarts collab hosted by @ homeofbangtan)

summary: game changer (n) - a newly introduced element or factor that changes an existing situation or activity in a significant way. it’s the little things that end up making the biggest difference. as you find out in your 6th year, amidst a heated rivalry with Gryffindor Seeker Jeon Jungkook.

Series

Discombobulated Drabbles

wine - yoongi

yellow - namjoon

pink - taehyung

kaleidoscope - jungkook

glass - hoseok

[jamgrlsblog]

2020 Fic Roundup

When I started 2020, I had no idea I would write as much as I did! I was starting my first Ineffable Wives fic, which became a theme of the year 😂. When I finished District of (un-)Certainty in 2019, I thought that would be my last idea (except for a sequel I started and never finished: whoops). Instead, I completed 8 fics and 2 podfics and wrote a little more than half of an ongoing WIP I still haven’t finished. That’s a total of 11 works listed under 2020 on AO3! (And 130k words.) Here’s a roundup ☺️.

Peaches, Apples, and Other Forbidden Fruit (Fic & Podfic) 

55k, E

This was my first wives fic and started with a prologue that just popped into my head one night. I really wanted to write about what it was like to be a woman, with all those little vanities and insecurities that complicate self image, and with a deep connection to classic books about women influencing and shaping how she might interact with the world. And then I made it Southern and threw Aziraphale into a sorority with Crowley 😂. And it became about internalized biphobia and about unlearning biases and about love formed of long time friendship and deep knowing.

I decided to podfic it as I was writing because I wrote Crowley as dyslexic and I decided, out of honor for her, to make a more accessible version of the fic 😅. This was a total whim- I had no idea what I was getting into, but boy did I learn on the job! I read the entire fic in a Southern accent and had a lot of fun. I also drove my spouse crazy because I made him stay quiet while I was recording, but he bought me a “how to podcast” book for Christmas, so maybe you’ll get more podfic in the future 😉.

I made friends, thanks to this fic, including @miss-minnelli and @tawnyontumblr, who I can’t imagine not knowing now! I also made friends with @leoswork, who made 3 art pieces inspired by this fic, which I am still amazed by!

Oil Paint Stains

498 words, G

This was written for a “Name that Author” game in the Good Omens Events discord server and was such fun! I hardly knew anyone at that time and threw myself in anyways. It was a great way to get started making friends and a great little challenge to write a fic under 500 words! This, I think, is when I firmly established myself as a Wives writer 😂. 

Class Action

500 words, M

Listen, this was another “Name that Author” game, and I wanted to try a new pairing to change things up (I knew if I wrote wives again, I would be known) and I wanted to try writing exactly 500 words as an extra challenge. I didn’t know I would post it. I certainly didn’t know it would have the most kudos of 2020. Literally just a silly Warlock/Adam thing.

Strawberries Aren’t Forbidden (Fic & Podfic) 

8k, E

This is a companion piece to Peaches, Apples, and Other Forbidden Fruit about just how Crowley was doing all that time that Zira was pining 😂 (hint: she was also pining). Writing this on the side tempered my writing of the first fic by helping me remember how Crowley was feeling the whole time! This is pretty angsty, tbh, but we’ve got a fun and happy ending. I podficced this because I had to to keep with the first one! This one is in Crowley’s valley girl accent (aka, mostly just how I usually talk 😅.)

Summer Swims and Strings

5k, M

I wrote this for @suvroc as part of the Wives October gift exchange. This was my first exchange and I was so nervous about my giftee liking it! I really enjoyed writing reconnected lovers. The general tone and feel of this fic was heavily influenced by Folklore, which I was very into when writing this, so we’ve got a calm, reflective, and full of love lakeside fic!

Frights and Feelings

4k, T

This one was for @sk3tchid, also for the Wives gift exchange! I got to do something spooky and Halloweeny, which I was thrilled about. I took a big risk with this fic- I wrote two stories in one fic. I decided “ooh, what if they are watching a spooky movie!” so I could somehow fit spooky and cozy homey feels in one fic. And it worked? I guess 😂. Regardless, it was lots of fun!

cowgirl like me

6k, T

This fic started as me shouting about Evermore on the Wives discord server and I happened to mention that cowboy like me was giving me ineffable spouses feels, and being on the wives server, I got the response of wives? Wives! And I was like, nah, I don’t have time. And then I thought, well, and I wrote this fic over the course of one weekend. @tawnyontumblr made it readable 😂.

lover

4k, T

This was a companion to cowgirl like me. I had just gotten married and was having feels about Crowley and the late husband I invented for the first fic (which is Eric the Disposable Demon! So cute!) and also feels about marriage in general. So I wrote this little vignette thing, and my first f/m fic! I didn’t think anyone would read it, but @tawnyontumblr encouraged me to write it anyways ☺️. She really made this readable. I gave her a skeleton of a fic that she encouraged me to actually flesh out!

Star of the Wooded Mountain

WIP, 46k+, T

Listing this one last, even though it was 4th to start posting and the 2nd to start writing. I started posting this in June!! I actually believed that I would be able to write and post my entire summer camp fic during the summer and it would be like “ooh, seasonally appropriate!”. Lol. I’ve got 6/10 chapters up currently.

This is part of the Good AUmens event and how I was introduced to the Good Omens Events discord server!! I’m so glad I signed up for this event because this server has become such a huge part of my life and has been a place where I’ve made so many friends!

I signed up for the event saying I was going to write a wives fic, as was my 2020 theme. But when I actually sat down to write, I started writing Crowley as a non-binary/agender character instead. This fic became an exploration of gender and identity and navigating early adulthood. I met @parmejeannecheese thanks to this fic, who stepped up, never having sensitivity read before, and has put so much time and thought into helping me with this fic. I cannot overstate how amazing they are and how lucky I was to find them. 

I have learned so much writing this fic!! And it has become so much bigger and better than I could have imagined. I’m excited to keep posting this one into 2021 ☺️.

And that’s all my fics of 2020! I hope some of you have enjoyed them or might enjoy them in the future! Here’s to what may come in 2021! Maybe I’ll write a husbands fic again one day? Literally wrote none in 2020 😂.

[godsofhumanity]

GODHUNTER by AMY SUMIDA | REVIEW

okiee this was recommended to me by @inkleaves ^-^ uhmm so i have a LOT to say about this book. spoilers under cut.

OVERVIEW: “Godhunter” is the epithet given to a young woman named Vervain who uses witchcraft and magic to go around committing deicide in order to save humanity from gods who drain their energy to gain immortality and other godly attributes. However, when Vervain is recruited by the Norse god Thor, she finds herself in an alliance with the people she originally considered her enemies, as they work together to save the world from the maliciousness of the Aztec god, Huitzilopochtli.

RATING: 2/10. i’m giving it a low rating because it doesn’t really have too much to do with mythology, but i did like its general portrayal of most deities even though this book was insanely cringey and dumb.. now, even though under the cut, i’ve kinda bashed the book quite a bit, i still have to admit that i’d be lying if i said i didn’t have fun reading it. i stayed up to 1 AM trying to finish it because i had to find out what the protag’s next stupid decision would be,, all in all, if you like trash/cringe fiction- this is for you.

WARNING: even though this book is a YA novel, I’d say there’s a definite emphasis on the adult part of “young adult”... Certain scenes and themes are inappropriate for minors.

AVAILABLE ON: pdf link here ^-^ ((i think it downloads immediately if you click))

THINGS I LIKED:

the book is cringe.

great diversity in terms of the god cast. i learned about some new deities that i was previously unfamiliar with, so that was cool

Brahma (Hindu deity) wears a Gucci belt as part of his attire ^-^

whatever Estsanatlehi and Tsohanoai (Native American deities) had going on.... they were really cute and wholesome

THOR-HORUS BROTP AGENDA!!!!!!!! everyone who follows me already knows how keen i am about this idea of all the war deities hanging out together (fite club), and this novel served up exactly that. disappointing that Huitzilopochtli wasn’t a part of it, but i am settling for Thor and Horus’ several centuries old friendship.

Horus’ falcon tattoo detail.. i LOVE the idea of the gods having their sacred animals tattooed,, it’s so awesome!!!

Pan... i liked the way he still had his little horns, and he was kinda chaotic and fun.

in general, the descriptions of the gods were so pleasant and so cool.. i really liked the way that pretty much all the gods were beautiful,, this is very much in line with my own idea of how the gods look, and i think it makes sense, because they’re meant to be charismatic, compelling beings- beings that you worship, beings that you praise- why would they be anything but beautiful? and even if they were considered ugly by other gods, that’s only in comparison to other deities.. from a human perspective,, i just can’t see how any mortal could consider a god to be anything less than perfection,, idk

in particular- i really enjoyed the descriptions of Huitzilopochtli in his debut. i know he’s a piece of shit in the novel, but i LOVED the way he was described with his war-frenzy being triggered by blood, and the way, as god of the sun, his body almost glows, and heats up as though you’re looking into the sun itself, and the only way he can cool it down is by bathing in blood... WOWOWOWOW it’s just such a neat and fantastic visual description. his physical appearance really paid tribute to Huitzilopochtli’s original domain and attributes.

i also liked the linking between Huitzilopochtli being the Father of Vampires.. links between Aztec culture and vampirism is a trope that i didn’t originally suspect, but have become exposed to quite a bit as of late,, and i think that it’s quite a clever little plot. i liked that Huitzilopochtli also debunks superstitions about the sun, garlic, crosses, holy water etc.

Huitzilopochtli as the villain. the man makes a BRILLIANT villain- his motives are very clear and also, i thought, justified, albeit unoriginal. his presence is quite terrifying, and the reader does worry for Vervain’s safety whenever she’s with him- which is good! this means that he fills out his role as a villain well. tbh,, i did love Huitzilopochtli from the moment of his debut, but he got knocked out of my books during a certain temple scene and i have some thoughts about that in the next section.

when Vervain wakes up after the temple dream with Huitzilo, and she relaxes because it was just a dream, but then she looks into the mirror and sees bite marks on her neck!!! CHILLS! now THAT was good writing- it was unexpected, and served well to navigate into the next part of the plot.

Odin and Huitzilopochtli holding a ted talk on “how to create panic and discord among the humans”, and the gods having to bring certain meals depending on what the first letter of their names were.

Vervain’s pop-culture references, and her weaponry- especially the gloves that have blades in them that get released when she swings her hand downwards. very cool, i want them.

casual appearances from Vladimir Putin (yes, i said Vladimir Putin)... i couldn’t stop laughing when i read that Huitzilo was trying to kill Putin’s daughter to instigate a war...... asdhshajdhasdjfhjdhf insane

also i know Vervain was trying to mock Huitzilo when she nicknamed him “Blue”,, but like.. that’s a really cute name and it wasn’t even insulting.. yeah, that one backfired on you Vervain... if anything, that just made it seem like she actually had affections for him and i feel like probably in part is the reason why he felt encouraged to pursue her.

THINGS I DIDN’T LIKE/THINGS THAT DIDN’T MAKE SENSE AND/OR CONFUSED ME:

the book is cringe.

it reads like a 15 year old’s fantasy AU where she’s a humble young woman, unextraordinary- yet somehow, she is the muse of every man’s desire. handsome, ripped gods who never wear clothes are laying themselves down at her feet,, and she is just overwhelmed by the choices before her; and all the while, she has to balance a complicated love life with her duty to save the world (since she’s the only one who can).

Vervain as a protagonist. idk how old she’s meant to be, but since the book is in first-person, and the reader is exposed to her innermost thoughts,, i’ve gotta say- she’s incredibly immature. as a protagonist, i just feel like she’s rude, pretentious, snobby.. she has no idea what “respect” even means. in every scene, she’s either fighting someone, or lusting after them (when Teharon told her off for having lascivious thoughts about him, and she simply responded with “well stop being so sexy then” i wanted to die.... WHAT is wrong with her)

i hate the way she looks down on the gods- even if you didn’t worship them, or even believed in their existence, surely you wouldn’t have the gall to lecture Hades and Persephone on how to be a good couple (especially when your advice is shit). surely you wouldn’t have the gall to say to Thor what Vervain says to him on pg 227, 4th line from the bottom, that i will not repeat here. Vervain is just too self-absorbed. i don’t hate her, but i definitely think her character is a bit,,, iffy.

relating to Vervain as the protagonist- everything just seems to happen to her.. and i know that she’s the protag, and things are meant to happen to her, but it all happens to her one after the other in succession, no breaks. it’s so easy for her... oh? Huitzilopochtli is going to kill Putin’s daughter? no worries, Vervain can read Huitzilopochtli’s thoughts! oh? the gods have never been able to transform more than half their body into their animal form? no worries, Vervain is so powerful she can force a god to change against their will! oh? Vervain is being attacked by blood-thirsty wolves? no worries, she saved the life of one werewolf and now he’s indebted to her and will literally kill himself in order to protect her! everything is easy, and nothing is a problem.

the way every male deity ever sees Vervain once and immediately wants to take her to bed. why was that a necessary aspect of her character? and also, why are the gods portrayed as such lustful beings?? it really wasn’t necessary.

Horus throwing a fit about how December 25 is his birthday and that it was stolen from him by Jesus... to quote:

“No big deal?” Horus puffed up. “I was called the Lamb of God. I had twelve apostles, and my myths spoke of my crucifixion and consequent resurrection in three days. His stories were my stories first!”

it’s fine that Horus is angry about his birthday which was i think, historically celebrated around this date- but the rest of it isn’t even true???? Horus didn’t have 12 apostles, i’m pretty sure he was also not called “Lamb of God”, and he wasn’t crucified!!! aghhhh even Thor says “It’s been so long that even you don’t remember things accurately.”

anyways.. my beef with this is the way it’s phrased so as to imply that “oh christianity just stole everything from the pagans” when this is so incredibly false and sounds like something an ill-informed person would say. you can read more about christianity, paganism and christmas here

kinda related to the previous point- the jokes about Jesus’ skin colour. i quote:

“... when Christ first became a god, he looked Jewish because those were the people he chose to align himself with. However, the Jews didn’t want him, and when Christianity spread, the white people wanted Jesus to look more like them. With the change in belief, Christ’s appearance changed. ... We used to tease him about how he looked whiter every time we saw him... Kind of like Michael Jackson...”

what the FUCK??????? seems like Sumida doesn’t understand that various ethnic groups illustrate Jesus as appearing as the local people do. Yes, obviously in a Western country, Jesus is going to look European, he’s going to look white. If you go to Japan, you will see Jesus and the rest of the gang looking pretty fucking Japanese. the point of this is NOT to erase Jesus’ Jewish ethnicity, and it is certainly not because of something like “the Jews didn’t want him”- it is because it is a way for followers to better relate to the Divine. including Christ in this story isn’t the problem- i’ve seen others do it very well. the problem is how uneducated her writing comes across.

all the gods have human jobs so that they can earn money and stuff,, which is fine- Thor, for example, owns a line of boats, which makes sense. but Pan? his job is making p*rn. now even though it’s true that everyone associates Pan with sexuality and stuff,,, this isn’t his primary role, and making Pan out to be just a playboy who has his mind in the gutter 24/7 i think is a bit of a mockery. Pan is, first and foremost, a god of the Wild. why Sumida elected to make him a p*rn manufacturer and not a wildlife conservationist is beyond me... i’m not even pagan, and i thought this creative decision was distasteful and stupid, especially because his character is actually quite light-hearted and cool.

the temple scene with Huitzilopochtli and Vervain. as i said previously, i really really liked Huitzilo’s character. he made an excellent villain. but this part?? i understand why it was done, but i HATED that it had to happen... not just because it was horrible for Vervain, but Huitzilo seemed so powerful and godly right up to that point- after which he seemed pretty pathetic- going back after Vervain after she’s rejected him countless times. she is JUST a mortal!!! c’mon Huitzilo, give it up!!! you are degrading yourself at the expense of achieving one mortal’s “love”.. the fact that he had to hypnotise her to get what he wanted AND had to achieve it through her dreams (when’s she can’t protect herself) was sooooo pathetic and disgraceful.. IMO, he committed the worst sin any person could ever commit and i just... AGHHHHHHHHH SMH WHY?!

speaking of morons- Thor. Thor just comes across to me as extremely possessive, and over-protective,, and idk how Vervain was NOT creeped out by the fact that Thor had literally been stalking her for two years before she even met him. wtf? god or not- that’s creepy. actually, i think it’s creepier because he is a god. 

Sif. i am still waiting for good media representation of thunder god Thor and his beautiful golden-haired wife Sif- i want them to be HAPPY, and i want them to be in love the way they should be! 

Persephone. i like the idea of Persephone being sweet-tempered, and kind- but in this book, she’s such a wimp??????? she totally just lets Vervain be rude to her, a goddess who’s name means “Bringer of Destruction”. also- her relationship with Hades seems toxic.. i mean,, he like tracks her? she starts stuttering when she talks to him, and gets nervous when people so much as mention his name. not to mention the fact that Persephone says that when she does go back to him, all he demands from her is a certain horizontal dance so much so that she is “sore” (<- quoting from the book here) every time she returns??????? WHAT IS HAPPENING?????????? and no one even questions it. Vervain doesn’t even question it! instead she suggests that Persephone MOVES IN with Hades permanently???? and that Hades should just start verbally saying how much he loves Persephone instead of “showing” her how much he “loves” her.....??? there are SO many issues with this.. i can’t even- *screams*

the Aphrodite-is-madly-in-love-with-Huitzilopochtli side plot. it could have been really good, but then it ends so abruptly,,, i mean.. why’d Aphrodite get done so dirty like that? Also summary of Hephaestus’ first and final scenes:

Hephaestus, entering the room: Right, what’s all this then? Vervain: Your wife is cheating on you (again) Hephaestus: Aight, i’m out *leaves and never comes back for the rest of the book*

what the HECK was the ending with Trevor?? i hate Vervain so much i can’t... okay first of all- WHY did Trevor decide to have a wolf-marriage with Vervain?? he kept on going on about how she’s so beautiful, and kind, and caring... NO SHE ISN’T TREVOR!!! i’m so mad that he would pledge himself for all eternity to this girl who doesn’t even like him in that way!!! you played yourself son

also- Thor accepts the fact that Trevor is going to have to be close by to Vervain because the terms of the marriage state that Trevor will literally die without her touch, which is VERY GENEROUS of Thor... but Vervain?? ooooh i HATE her.. she has the audacity to look at Trevor with her lecherous eyes thinking about lustful things IN THOR’S OWN BED!!!!! and then she thinks to herself “oh whoops i shouldn’t be thinking that”- yeah you’re darn right you shouldn’t be thinking that!!!! whatttt is wrong with her............. 

also- where tf did Huitzilo go??? he just gave up on trying to instigate a war and vanished?? the plot was so unresolved?????? AGH!

[sargentr]

my fave drarry fics of all time, part one

so, after discovering i’ve officially been reading drarry fanfic for 4 years now, i decided to show my (quite big) list of favorite drarry fics. there are 46 in total, but i’ve listed 10 down below. the first three are my absolute favorites but the rest are equally as good

most of my notes are fresh from when i wrote them post-reading. i’ve changed some, seeming less like a crazy unstable bitch, but fuck these were all emotional as fuck. enjoy

ps: i dont really know how to tag people i dont follow. i cant try and tag the authors later. soz!!

pps: most of these i read when i was really into a bottom!draco phase, so most of them contain that, some are switch tho (as it should be, yikes past me)

1. Everything That Happen is From Now On / ~43K 

After surviving a brutal assault, Draco tries to navigate the tumultuous waters of his mind, and embrace a bit of love and trust in his life. After all, the smallest steps forward can begin to heal the most fractured of souls

okay so before i get in to how beautiful this story is, i wanna say that it does touch on rape quite explicitly. i cried like an idiot reading the entire thing, because draco’s pain is navigated in the most beautiful and realistic way. it touches on a subject very risky for me, very personal, and i still can’t think of a better drarry story. draco’s very draco about it all, and harry is very harry about it all. it’s just perfect, and messy, and tender, and sad. i’ve reread it more than any other fic, and it doesn’t disappoint. 

2. Pocket Full of Starlight / ~46K

When Scorpius Malfoy and Jamie Potter meet at Quidditch camp, they take an instant dislike to each other. Then they discover their lives are more connected than they could possibly imagine.

ah yes. the magic of kid fics. the TASTE

parent trap au. i read this one recently, like 3 months back, and absolutely fell in love with everything about it, partially because the parent trap is legit one of my top 10 favorite movies of all time. its just. the essence, the IDEA, is soooo mf beautiful. i cant get enough of reading when harry or draco finally meet the other twin, or how they cant stop loving each other even after 11 years. my heart clenched throughout the whole thing. 

3. Temptations on the Warfront / ~180K

Draco Malfoy is forced into hiding with the Golden Trio and dragged into their search for horcruxes. What ensues is a journey of redemption, unexpected friendships and an unwanted, turbulent romance with Harry Potter. Warnings for swearing, sexual content, and dark themes. 

this was the first drarry fic ive ever read, and before this mf i HATEDDD this pairing. so you can imagine how much it took to convince me otherwise, bc i was 100% scorbus before this.

to be fair, horcrux hunting with draco involved is, possibly, my favorite trope ever. its unique. theres tension, both sexual and life threatening. in some ways it romanticizes the war, but fuck it it aint a real war. 

slowest of burns. amazing. life changing. long as hell. nothing else to be said except read it right now i demand it.

4. Clouding the Senses / ~58K

As everyone returns to Hogwarts for a final eighth year, some people are coping better with the aftermath of the war than others. After encountering a very drunk Draco Malfoy one night, Harry realises that maybe those that lost loved ones aren’t the only ones trying to escape the war. Blaise Zabini seems to think Harry can help Malfoy, that the Slytherin might actually listen to him. Harry is not so sure. Dependence is a tricky thing, and one addiction can quickly shift to another.

everyone that reads drarry loves 8th year fics, but this ones just kinda different from all those normal (yet entertaining) ones. draco’s an alcoholic in this, and one night harry tries to help him and whoops, one thing leads to the other and they start having casual sex. its really, really amazing how both draco and harry navigate the addiction, i really cant say it has any flaws. 

i know the author got a lot of hate on their fics and thats why they took them down, but they’re truly one of the best drarry authors out there. i’ve reread this a couple of times, and the tenderness, the love and confusion is all very on character. a+

5. Restraint / ~153K

Someone casts the Imperius curse on Draco Malfoy, and whatever the instructions may be, Harry finds himself an unwilling target. The encounter leaves him torn between pleasure and revulsion. As they fight in the aftermath, a tense game begins. Harry fights to convince Malfoy, and himself, that he was not affected by that initial encounter, or any of those following it.

Faced with a series of escalating encounters, Harry must come to terms with desiring things he never thought he could, things he wishes he didn’t respond to. They each use signs of arousal as weapons against each other in a mad struggle to finally shame the other into backing down for good. 

But it’s only after the game is over that Harry starts to understand.

this is by the same author of clouding the senses, and i read this just this week. at first, it’s shocking, because it plays around with consent in a very unsettling way. when communication comes in, and its starts getting healthier, you can really understand where the author found the idea of playing with consent. it is, in my opinion, 100% characteristic of how they would behave post-war, with that grief and confusion. it’s also dom/sub in some parts, and that’s mf hot. 

it also has my favorite tropes in it, but it’s a spoiler to say which one. i’ll probably mention the trope in the list along with a bunch others, but when u finish reading you’ll know which one ;)

6. Humbug / ~30K

Draco has been taking his casual relationship with Harry for granted. Visits from four key ghosts the night before Christmas just might shake up his priorities in life.

(felt like it was valid to just paste what i wrote in my notes app after reading this)

(FUCKKKKKK HOW TO EVEN START?!!!?? just a fucking bonus, draco is THE best bottom o ever exist i love my bottom son so much. this story isnt only amazing it’s excruciatingly painful to read, harry and draco have been sleeping together but harry is completely in love with him. draco doesnt see how much harry cares for him or how much hes hurting harry by treating their fling like its just that, a FLING. with that, draco is haunted by three ghosts. one of the past, the present and the future, AND THEY SET THAT IDIOT STRAIGHTTTT 1800000/10. the gays DO KEEP MF WINNING!!!

7. in your arms, rests my world / ~24K

Harry presses his mouth to Malfoy's forehead; he wants to tell him that he’ll never leave, that he wouldn’t dream of it.

“You make me feel safe, Potter” Malfoy whispers. “You keep me safe.”

the friends with benefits trope doesnt ever disappoint, top 5 tropes fr, especially if its also 8th year. harry and draco get into their little thing, but of course nothing ever is simple between them. by the preview, you can clearly see how much draco likes harry (also another 10/10 trope, the ‘i’ve been in love with harry potter since i was 11′ one). my only tiny issue with this is that harry fucks it up just a tad, but it of course adds up to the drama of it all, which i absolutely love.

noting it also touches on non-con/rape and, and all in all, is extremely angsty. one i was tense from beginning to end. but i am gonna say it ends amazingly and v happily.

8. Playing the Hero / ~29K

Nobody kissed me like Harry did. He kissed like he flew; he kissed like he duelled - with his whole being, not caring about anything else. I had never felt as vulnerable as I did when he kissed me, seizing all and any control I had over myself. But when Harry kissed me, I felt free...

so the thing about angst is that it ignites that mf feeling side u that even tho it hurts you cannot get enough of. this fic was EVERYTHINGGG. it made cry and laugh and smile. also another trope i absolutely adore is them breaking up and not being 100% ok with that, bc ding ding!! YALL STILL LOVE EACH OTHER!! 

i cant describe how i felt, honestly. i would just paste my notes (i wont bc spoilers) but it looks like i went thru sum shit. deadass

9. fine i’ll hold my breath / till i forget it’s complicated  / ~ 15K with the two parts

Harry and Draco become friends with benefits, and Harry thinks it's more complicated than it actually is.

u know, fluff is a drug. i dont know if its beucase 90% of drarry fics are about angsty get-togethers, but i had butterflies in my stomach when i read this. its adorable. draco is so clearly in love, he jusT SMILES A LOT I CANTTT. 

its cute. i love it to death. have some fluff before starting your day.

10. Un Noël très parisien / ~14K

When Draco crossed paths with Auror Potter at a political function in Paris, he was not expecting their former animosity to change into something rather more intriguing. But he could be certain their casual flirtation would not last more than the night, couldn't he?

look. i know i named a lot of my favorite tropes here, but i cant end this without mentioning how much single dad draco affects me. i love scorpius and how much he changes draco in every fic he appears. i love parent draco and i shant be silent about it (especially when scorpius is legit just a year old in this. i died)

as it states, harry and draco have a one night stand but draco thinks thats it, that it was all he was ever gonna have. he’s wrong of course, and the path it takes, with both scorpius and harry there, just melted my mf heart.

well kids that’s all i have for now. imma work on a part two with 10 other fics i really love!1

[pkmntrashcan]

Meet Me Under the Mistletoe [Bede x Gloria]

It’s not like Bede hated the holidays, he just never had a proper celebration. But when the Annual Christmas Bash becomes riddled with an unspoken tradition between him and Gloria, Bede finds himself aching to change things up.

[Read on AO3]

Bede could hear the rush of blood flowing along the coos and awws in his ear from every gym leader and guest at this party. He frantically looked everywhere and anywhere but at the shorter girl in front of him.

It was all still new to Bede; celebrating the holidays, surrounded by people, being invited to events-- “you want me to attend the Christmas party?” fumbling from his lips  in disbelief when Gloria looked up at him with those unobstructed telling eyes. In her hand a sophisticatedly decorated invitation being pressed into his.

“Turns out it’s annual, and since we just joined, we’re kinda expected to be there,”  Gloria said matter-of-factly, as he glanced over that the event was being held at Miss Magnolia’s this year. His mouth was ready to let out a flat ‘no.’ Parties were crowded and noisy, and by the few months he had been in his position he had learned that the other gym leaders were definitely  loud .

But then he sees her stare fall, her boot kick a small pebble away, her fingers fidget with the straps of her backpack.

“Parties aren’t really my thing...I was hoping you would go in solidarity with me?”

Yet, even with their truce, he didn’t expect to see her eyes staring at him so brightly as they were trapped underneath a miniscule green plant with white berries. Christmas lights reflected off the amber, off the sparkle of her green dress, off her peachy lips.

Mistletoe. Lips. Kiss. 

Bede could feel himself freeze in place, flush rising from his neck to his face. Gloria’s tranquility unnerving him more and more until she stifles a laugh, a gentle hand landing on his deep purple sweater.

(He didn’t get the memo to dress up in shades of Christmas.)

“You don’t know what mistletoe is at all, huh?”

A valid assumption. 

His own throaty, “no, I...recognize the tradition.” Only audible for Gloria, accepting that if he was to be made fun of, it would only be acceptable from the one he considers an acquaintance. He braces for the snicker, or even a scoff at his ineptitude--he never had celebrated Christmas before--but he doesn’t even get a cheeky grin out of the Champion. Her face only shifting into something more comforting and welcoming like the cup of hot chocolate she had handed him earlier.

“We don’t have to Bede, I understand.”

And with disappointed hums, and onlookers turning away, all he’s left is with is the lingering warmth of her hand patting his cheek; her body navigating the crowd, his head following her every movement.

“Bede, you Slowpoke c’mon, I want to show you how to build a gingerbread house!”

It would be a lie to say Bede didn’t stay by Gloria’s side the whole event.

--

It’s during the second Christmas party where things got a little more  interesting . 

Despondency replaced with impartiality, acquaintanceship had turned to friendship, holiday traditions ingrained. He got the memo this time for the theme-- “An Ugly Christmas Sweater Extravaganza,” in gaudy letters on the invite made by Leon this time. 

And he was so close to throwing it away--He didn’t enjoy the small-talk. He didn’t desire to spend another evening awkwardly standing by the punch bowl like the Halloween party. And he definitely didn’t like seeing Gloria beaming cutely at everyone in with her subdued, yet still happy, holiday cheer.

But she asked nicely, hands gripping his in a near plea the day prior. 

So he came.

And now he stands directly in the way of her curved lip as her eyes flicker to the ugly Ponyta christmas sweater he was wearing underneath a black blazer, cheesy fairy lights strung within the seams blinking in and out, hues of deep pink and purple the only sign of his typical aesthetic. 

His brow furrows defensively, aware that he wore this cause she reminded him of the detail. So he looks down onto her tiny frame in an attempt to tease her own choices of fashion (really Gloria, a Deliberd sweater, could you be any more cliche?) when he catches glimpse of something  menacing  hanging above her, above  them.

Green and white, again.

It was clearly too high for Gloria’s vantage point, but it was at the perfect height for him to notice. And as he gapes, Gloria couldn’t help but to tilt her head back to see what has made him of all people so  silent.

“So we meet here again, huh,  Bedey? ”

The dreaded nickname she had donned on him that year euphonious to his ear like the bells and chimes he heard all over Galar.

And it was this year he had found that this wasn’t the only thing about her that made him yearn for more. If anything there were a series of reactions he had to the Champion that were strange and unsettling. His heart was always racing. His hands always clammy. His throat would go dry. Arceus, sometimes he believed he couldn’t even think straight when she sat across from him at tea.

He had assumed it was a simple consequence of their growing camaraderie. But never, until this moment, did he think of wanting to kiss that undisturbed grin off her face.

Yet she stands there calmly with her hands clasped behind her back, her chin tilted up, a devilish sparkle in her eye. 

He opens his mouth to excuse the silly tradition for the second year in the row. His mind may be in the gutter, but it by no means meant hers was on the same page.

But then it happens in a flash.

Her hands firmly land on his chest. Her height raising ever so slightly to reach her target.

Soft pink lips touch his cheek.

His hand clamps over the spot, throat lodged unable to question her decisions.

She laughs once more, lowering back to her usual height.

“That should do, right? For avoiding traditions sake?”

His head nods yes. His heart screams no.

--

365.

That’s how many days Bede regretted not acting on that whim that overcame him on Christmas.

365.

That’s how many days he got playful shoves, sly comments, all too obvious:  “oi, you wanna keep your eyes in your head oh Elite one? ” from Hop or Marnie or for Arceus’ sakes, Opal, whenever Gloria would be in the same vicinity.

365.

That’s how many days Bede has actively admitted to himself he was in love with Gloria.

If he was honest, he knew it had been much longer. 

But hiding his emotions and swallowing them down was much easier than even fathoming the idea of telling Gloria, let alone believing that any of it was reciprocal. 

But it was 365 days way too long. And this time the invitation was written by Gloria herself. It was delicately decorated and personally handed to him with a blush and a hopeful, “I hope you come this year too!”

So with no fuss or fight he knew he was going, because this  tradition  between them had to end. 

It’s on the third Christmas party that he arrives fashionably late.

Not because of his wardrobe, traffic, or anything reasonable--but because he spent far too long pacing outside of Gloria’s house wondering how this would go down.

Is it the first thing he should do? To set the mood of the whole night?

Or should it be the last thing? To run away when it all hit the fan?

He takes a deep inhale in, a slower exhale out. Knocking on the door, anxiously waiting to be let in. The moment the door swung open he realized that things may not go according to plan. Gloria flings herself into his arms,  per usual  , his brain malfunctions,  per usual.  

A small gasp from her as she takes in his red ensemble-- “your hair makes you a really good Bedey-Claus.” And he couldn’t help but noticing they were a matching pair, her own Santa dress swishing as she turns.

His mouth opening to compliment her; to say that she looked beautiful, to say anything remotely nice  -- but she doesn’t give him the chance. Looping her arm through his, dragging him into the festivities,  per usual , as her laugh gets drowned out by the Christmas jingles and the loud celebratory “look who finally showed up!”

But as he gapes at Gloria interacting in and out with everyone at the party, his knew his goal was clear. 

That this would be the year.

The year he would kiss her. 

The year he would admit his feelings. 

The year their unspoken tradition would stop.

“Hey Bede,” the voice so undoubtedly hers that he turns almost immediately and he notices her hand tugging at the sleeve of his red sweater. “Do you maybe, want to talk outside?”

Bede follows without a single complaint, but there’s something in her aura that feels strangely off. Something antsy, nervous, yet resolute. When she’s leaning against a doorframe, he can see her eyes watching the guests enjoy themselves to the merriment inside. But it doesn’t seem like she’s longing to join them. Instead it seems as if she’s surveying to see if they really were left to their own devices.

Her hazel eyes flicker to his with a soft smile he could recognize was only ever shown to him. Had she wanted to be with him only?

A foolish thought surely, but one that now lingered in the back of his head, and it’s one that pushed him forward for the first time that night.

 “Gloria.”

His stomach flipping at how her head tilts cutely. “Yes, Bedey?” Her eyelashes batting inquisitively as he braces himself with the last two steps between them.

“The plant,” is all he can haphazardly say.

Gloria blinks in confusion, Bede’s hands clenching in anticipation.

“The plant. The green one. Where is it?”

An amused chuckle fills the silent night air. A single digit points up above their heads. 

“I know we have our traditions to meet under the mistletoe, but I never thought you would seek it out, Bede,” Gloria smiles.

It’s in this smile that Bede finds a little bit of hope. A Christmas miracle, if anything. She doesn’t move and it occurs to him that she brought him out here in hopes for them to be caught underneath the mistletoe again.

“It’s our tradition, no?”

And dare he say, there was a hint of a challenge in her tone. His eyes flickering from her lifted eyebrows down to her lips--this year they were red, enticing, tempting.

And easily twitching into a smirk.

“Is our tradition to meet under it? Or to avoid the kiss?”

Gloria hums, “your call,” she pauses, mirth dancing in her eyes. “But it’s never too late to start a new tradition, don’t you think?”

Bede’s heart picks up in speed. Staring at her with the utmost surprise. Had he heard her right? Was it not only him who wished to kissed her?

He takes a step closer, noting how her cheeks rivaled her red hat. How Gloria was incessantly biting her bottom lip. Her gaze flighty yet always stealing glances at his own lips.

Gloria liked him.

“You know the longer we stand under here, the longer the kiss we owe each other.”

Gloria  wanted  to kiss him.

Bede feels himself still, eyes widening in a panic, flush rising to the tips of his ears, Gloria giggling at his visceral reaction.

“T-that’s not a rule!”

“You also didn’t deny wanting to kiss me,” she points out all too easily in a sing-song voice. Stepping in closer with a much firmer resolve. 

“We’re up to three minutes now.”

“G-gloria!,” Bede gasps as he feels himself unable to move forward. His fists were opening and closing repeatedly, he could feel his face only turn hotter, the ticking of his watch growing louder and louder in sync with his pounding heart.

He knew he wanted to do this. He knew he wanted to dismantle their friendship and explore the potential  more  between them. But it was all so different in practice especially with Gloria’s knowing look staring him down and unnerving him. 

And he knew that she knew what she was doing. It was in her eyes, in the curl of her lip, in how she began to slowly snake her arms up and around his neck with the confidence he needed in himself right now.

“Four.”

Tip toeing as she pulls him down slightly. Beckoning him to finally act--to give him the chance to act before she did because Gloria was aware of his pride. Of his need to be first in everything, except maybe the Championship, but if he didn’t act, she would take away this chance too.

And that was the last thing he wanted.

“Fiv--,” he cuts her off, sure that her counting was off and unfair, but it makes him act all the same. The kiss soft, light, almost indiscernible if Gloria didn’t know he was trying to kiss her. But it was a kiss nonetheless, and one that he could feel her smile into, as he tried his best to not leave it at a clumsy mashing of their lips.

“I-I don’t know what I’m doing,” Bede admits.

“Me either,” is her cheeky response, but she chases his lips all the same.

A soft pass there. Another linger there. It was his first, and hers, but they knew it felt right.

All they could hear was the bass of the music, growing whispers, high-pitched whistles, but all they could focus on was each other. And while it wasn’t the five minutes Gloria joked about, the momentary kiss produced the best sight to bless Bede’s eyes. The dazed look, the flushed cheeks, the giddy smile on her lips as she flusteredly looked away from him.

Her serenity had broken and he couldn’t help the low chuckle coming from him. “If I get this look on your face I’ll have to kiss you more often,” Bede mumbles just loud enough for her to hear, his fingers gingerly reaching to turn her face. He could feel the heat radiating off her cheeks, but proud to know he wasn’t the only one affected as Gloria brings herself to look up at him again.

Or at least she tries as her gaze dips down shyly.

“I wanted to break tradition last year, but didn’t think you would want to,” she quietly admits and as both of them realize they skirted around their feelings for this long.

“Ah…,” Bede murmurs, his own composure faltering with the bubbling positive feelings dwelling inside.  “I guess I should kiss you for those five minutes to make up for that then.”

In response the mischievous smile he had grown to love presents itself underneath the splash of red on her face. “You need to kiss me for three years worth then,  Bedey, ” a tease, but one that gets him to roll his eyes and lean down again.

[timelords-angel-is-sherlocked]

Miraculous Holiday Prompts - Snowflakes (kagaminette)

With this 31 day promptmas, I’m going to attempt different ships I’ve never written before. Hopefully, I did Kagami justice.

Kagami was used to the cold. In Japan, the snow sometimes didn’t let up for months. On those snowy days, she would fence with her mother and do her stringent routines. She didn’t have time to think about the cold or any energy to shiver.

But this wasn’t Japan, it was Paris. Despite the clouds that blanketed the sky grey, Kagami figured it was still decent enough to go out for a run. She wore a grey tracksuit and warmed up outside of her house. Normally, she would have just gone to the gym, but Kagami was tired of being holed up inside her house. She wanted to go the scenic route. Plus, it gave her an excuse to stop by the Dupain-Cheng bakery to get some hot chocolate.

Surprisingly, Kagami ran into the baker’s daughter and almost fell into the Seine. Kagami was always focused and sharp-minded, yet she was too busy looking at the heavy clouds to look in front of her. In her defense, she doubted other people were running in this weather, much less the well-known klutz Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

“Hold on, I’ll pull you up.” Kagami was dangling off the side, one hand desperately clutching onto the small girl. With suspiciously no trouble, Marinette was able to pull the girl right up and caught her in a hug. “I’m sorry about that, I wasn’t paying attention.” Her face flushed as she took a small step back.

“I apologize as well. My mind was also occupied.” The two girls studied each other as if wondering what the other was doing out at this time.

“Did you just start?” They started to walk the direction Marinette was jogging.

“I’m only a mile in. I wanted to do four more, but it appears that it may finally snow soon,” the fencer gestured above them.

“You’re right.” Marinette almost seemed disappointed at the realization. “I really needed this run.” Kagami wasn’t used to seeing her this upset or agitated.

“We can continue to run. It may be a little reckless, but I don’t mind accompanying you until it does start to pour. Then we can seek shelter,” she reasoned aloud. The smaller girl lit up at that.

“I won’t slow you down, I promise.” Somehow, the Tsurugi didn’t doubt the statement.

Two hours later, two dripping wet girls entered the Dupain-Cheng giggling to themselves.

“Marinette!” Sabine ran over to her daughter and worriedly looked her up and down before a smile stretched across her face. “And I don’t believe we’ve met before?” She inquired to the girl next to her daughter and offered her hand.

“Kagami Tsurugi, ma’am,” she dutifully reported. “Your daughter and I know each other through Adrien Agreste.”

“It’s nice to meet you! Well, I’ll let you guys go up and dry off.”

“Thanks, Maman.” She kissed her mother on the cheek before heading through the back of the mostly empty bakery. Kagami followed.

“Do you want the Ladybug or Chat Noir pajamas?” The designer held up two onesies and Kagami chuckled at the options.

“I suppose I’ll take the honor of being Ladybug for the night if she doesn’t mind. I can only wish that I’ll live up to her beauty and heroics.” Kagami let a rare smile grace her face at her theatrics, completely missing the blushing Marinette as she went to the bathroom.

“I don’t think she minds at all,” she whispered into the empty room. “Hey Tikki, do you mind if I have company over? I know we were gonna go over some logistics.”

“Even Ladybug needs rest, Marinette! I like Kagami. Just make sure you two stay warm.” The human and kwami shared a face hug before the little god flew up into one of her favorite hiding spots to take a nap.

“This is surprisingly warm,” Kagami noted as she walked back into the room.

“You’ve never worn a onesie before?” The Ice Queen was examing the pajamas with a curious look.

“No. It’s best to stick with the practical things. I don’t think my mother would approve of this attire,” she added as an afterthought.

“Your mother is pretty strict, right? Like Adrien’s father.”

“She trusts me a bit more, so I am allowed to have some freedoms. As long as I’m home before curfew.” She glanced at the time on her phone. “Which is in approximately two and a half hours.”

“We’ll have enough time, then. I’ll change and grab us some treats. Would you like tea or hot chocolate?” 

“Hot chocolate would be nice, please.” Kagami bowed her head, a habit she still had ingrained in her from her time living in Japan.

Kagami realized that this was the first time she was actually in Marinette’s room. When they hung out, they would always go to their cafe or to the park or even walks around the city. After the first two walks with the baker’s daughter, Kagami noticed that Marinette seemed to know all of Paris. No exaggerations. Kagami was still relatively new to the city, and she knows her friend has lived here her whole life, but this familiarity wasn’t one of just by simply living here. It was one who often navigated the streets. 

“Wanna play Mecha Strike?” Marinette offered as she laid out the assortments of desserts she brought up with her.

“I’ve heard from Adrien how savage you are at it. I think that’s what he said,” she questioned herself with the wording.

“I am pretty good. I promise I’ll go easy on you.”

10 loses later on Kagami’s part, she huffed. “I’m not sure if I should be impressed or offended with how well you play.”

“I used to do this and design all the time before I got.. Busy.” Absentmindedly, she stroked her earring. Realizing what she had done, she played it off as tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. 

“Is it snowing?” Kagami walked over to the window and saw that it was snowing. It was soft in comparison to Japan’s relentless downpour.

“Woah! Wanna see something cool? I’ve been waiting for it to snow to see this. Come on!” Why was she going to ask if she was just going to go up through her trap door anyways?

Marinette’s balcony had a giant awning that covered nearly the whole space. Hanging from it were the cute little mini Christmas lights that Kagami often saw in most movies. They had a green and black pattern, no doubt trying to emulate Chat Noir’s theme. She had some beautiful pink Oleander’s that perfectly complimented the girl. There were also some Chinese Orange Blossoms that sat right at the edge of the awning. There was a pink futon next to a heat lamp. Kagami briefly wondered how they managed to get the stuff up here but was distracted by the view. She could see the fresh coat of white snow decorating the rooftops of Paris as if it were painted on. The wind was a bit strong, but Marinette turned on the heat lamp.

“This is amazing. Gorgeous, even,” Kagami complimented her friend. 

“T-Thanks. It took some..help setting it all up, but it was worth it.” Kagami didn’t miss the way her eyes glinted at the word “help” but chose not to comment on it.

The two sat in comfortable silence and drank their hot chocolates. Kagami has hung out with this girl many times, but this feels different. More intimate, even. 

“So Mme. Tsurugi is more lenient than M. Agreste?”

“Yes. She cares for me very much so and keeps me on a very strict schedule. Today was a free day I had this week and even then I wanted to spend it on meaningless things like running. I’m not sure I have hobbies. Do you get what I mean?”

“Not really,” she admitted.

“I fence religiously. I skate and read and do archery and so many other things because it is what my mother forced me into. Not because I like doing it. Every minute of my day is planned out, so when I have a day off, I am unsure what to do with myself. I am my mother’s faithful soldier and I will do as she commands with little to no hesitation. I suppose I feel like I am an unoriginal photocopy of my mother. I wonder if Adrien feels the same,” Kagami mused. Friends like this were still new to her, but she found that she actually enjoyed the company and speaking about her feelings. She doesn’t like being repressed. She was the Ice Queen and her mother drilled into her to conceal don’t feel, but it was a horrible way to live. Kagami wanted to be her own person, but she lived on a schedule for so long that she wondered whether that was possible or not.

“You aren’t your mom’s soldier,” Marinette tried to soothe. “I don’t think you are a photocopy of her. You just haven’t had practice expressing yourself. I saw how you ice skate. Precision, no hesitation.” They both smiled at the inside joke. “But ice skating can be more than that, too. It can be flying gracefully against the ice and expressing yourself in complex moves. I do that with my fashion decisions. And you’re just so you. It’s the little things. The way you listen so intently to what other people have to say. The beautiful smile you’ve been showing more and more. Your confidence. Do you know what they say about snowflakes?” She gestured to the snow around them.

“No?” Kagami looked at her with a confused face, although the blush from the kind words still remained.

“That they’re unique. No one of them is the same.” Kagami noticed how close they were suddenly. Their thighs were right next to each other, faces inches apart. “The same goes for people. And… And I think you’re a very unique snowflake. You may have some elements of your mother, but you still have parts that make you, you. Once you realize how much of an amazing person you are, you’ll stand out.” Both of the bluenettes were now blushing.

“Thank you, Marinette. No one has had anything to me like that before.” Kagami hesitantly reaches for her hand and grasps it once she has the courage to do so. “You’re inspiring.” Kagami wasn’t great at expressing herself or conveying her emotions, but it seemed as if Marinette got the message. She squeezed her hand in response.

They sat for a little bit under the awning, holding hands until an alarm went off on Kagami’s phone. “Crap, I’ve got to be home in half-hour.”

Before she could panic any further, Marinette took pity on her friend. “Calm down. I can have a friend give you a lift if you meet her downstairs.”

“In this weather though? I-”

“Do you trust me?”

“Yes.” Her answer was immediate. They cleaned up on the balcony and Kagami changed back into her mostly dry clothes. She said goodbye to her friend and her parents before stepping outside the warm bakery.

Once Kagami left her room, Marinette called out for Tikki. “Do you mind a quick patrol?” Tikki knew why she wanted to transform but played along. “Tikki, spots on!”

“I hear you need a lift?” Ladybug asks. Kagami just stared at the superhero with a dumbfounded look.

“I do,” she laughed to herself after she understood what happened. 

It was amazing seeing Paris from the back of a leaping superhero. Although most things just seemed like blurs, Kagami was enjoying the experience nonetheless.

“How often do you go on patrol?” Kagami asks before Ladybug could zip away.

“About three or four times a week if there are no akumas that day,” she answered honestly. That would explain how she knew the city so well.

“You know Ladybug,” she leaned in as if about to tell a secret. “I think you are the most beautiful snowflake of all.” Ladybug pulled back in surprise and her face was starting to get red (and it wasn’t because of the cold). Kagami gave a shy wave before stepping into her house, leaving Marinette blushing on the streets, her yo-yo limp in her hand.

After doing a quick swoop of the city, Marinette landed into her room and dropped her transformation. She was going to knit Kagami a snowflake scarf. If Tikki noticed the smile that didn’t leave her chosen’s face, she didn’t comment on it.

[scariusaquarius]

the secrets that we keep pt 3

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A/n: I belted this out as soon as I could tbh. Merry Christmas Eve, y’all! Thank you for all the lovely comments!! <3 

Tagging: @monst​

NAVIGATION: Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three (HERE) | Chapter Four | Chapter Five | Chapter Six | Chapter Seven | Chapter Eight

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Genre: Mystery, Angst, Horror, Hurt/Comfort Rated: Everyone Warning: Horror, Angst, Slight Swearing, Blood, Mentions of Blood, Nudity, Slight Sexual Theme

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Author: dabisburntnut

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The GPS had taken you and Tim about fifty-seven miles outside of Tuscaloosa, Rosswood a temporary memory in the rear-view mirror as you two drove to this man you knew. Tim was tired, his body aching and mind wishing for sleep. However, Tim continued to down his Red Bull as he drove. You weren’t in a good condition to drive, and Tim didn’t want to stop on the side of the road just in case the Operator was close behind.

Looking over at you, Tim rubbed his thumb against the skin of your hand. You looked peaceful as you slept, your head resting on a makeshift pillow of his tan jacket he had grabbed from the back of the car. Your hand was in his, your grasp slightly loose within your sleeping state. However, Tim held on tight, afraid of letting you go at any moment.

Bringing your hand up, Tim kissed the back of your hand gently, grounding himself as he felt his anxiety begin to flare up. He was worried about you, and intrusive thoughts were beginning to plague him as the worst-case scenarios began to play in his head. What if the Operator finally got you? What then? What would Tim have to fight for?

Yes, he could fight for himself…but was he truly worth it? Should he be allowed to walk the earth after all of the things that had happened within the last few years? Tim bit his lip. He had come to terms with the deaths of his friends, but in his mind, he knew it was partly his fault. Really. If he hadn’t met Alex or Brian or Jay, they would still be alive and living healthy, happy lives.

Maybe it wasn’t fair to be so hard on himself, but it was a weight that had sat on his shoulders for years. Even if Tim had you by his side for a bit of it, you had been kept in the dark for the whole time. To you, he had been dealing with family issues, as he had fibbed to you constantly whenever you would ask him about his disappearances and seemingly scattered mind.

Tim wasn’t ready to show you the tapes and the channel, and he knew he never would be.

Right now, you still had somewhat of a chance. Tim knew the Operator wanted him…so if Tim let you go, you could live a normal life…happy and content and alive. That was what mattered to Tim the most: that you lived and were okay and happy. Tim didn’t really care about what happened to him. If his death or compliance with the Operator meant your safety, then Tim would take that chance.

But was it his rightful choice to do so?

You were a stubborn woman, and you seemed to be dead-set on going through with this with him…could he really make this choice for you? Tim licked his lips and sighed before kissing the skin of your hand again. Your voice made him jump a bit, his head whipping towards you as you spoke.

“What’s got you so anxious, Tim?”

Tim was quiet for a moment before replying softly.

“I’m scared for you. If any of this goes wrong, you could die…and I can’t let that happen. I love you too much to let that thing take you…and it’s all my fault. It’s my fault that this is happening. If you and I had never met, you would still have a chance to lead a happy and normal life.”

You turned to him and said quietly, tightening your hold on his hand reassuringly.

“Tim, none of this is your fault. That thing…it chose us. We probably won’t ever know why, but it isn’t your fault just like it wasn’t Alex’s, Jay’s, or Brian’s. That thing, whatever it may be, is the reason why we are where we are right now.”

You were quiet before saying softly.

“I would never regret meeting you, even with the situation at hand now. I would go through this a hundred times if it meant I could have what I do with you.”

Tim looked over at you, his heart racing within his chest. Tim swallowed thickly and asked you quietly.

“Do you really mean that? Even if it meant that you could die…you would stay with me? Even if I was the reason this is all happening?”

You smiled lightly, your lips kissing the back of his hand just as he had done to you earlier.

“Well, I wouldn’t say I’m stupid, but I’m certainly in love, so yes. I would.”

Tim’s jaw clenched as he curbed his tears. Fucking hell. How did you do it? How were you able to still smile and love him through this? Tim really didn’t give you enough credit nowadays, did he? Tim didn’t know what to say, but it seemed that you always knew what he needed to hear.

“I’m certainly not going to call you stupid, but maybe a bit crazy for doing so.”

Tim decided to joke lightly, trying to ease the heaviness of the moment. You chuckled before you became quiet, looking out the window in thought. Tim reveled in the comfortable silence before he asked you.

“What are you thinking about?”

You sighed and rubbed your forehead, Tim’s eyes glancing over you as he wondered if your head was bothering you.

“I just feel kind of stupid. I neglected telling you about what I had been seeing because I wasn’t very sure if it was even real. I didn’t want to worry you or make you think I was crazy…but now I kind of wish I had told you sooner. Maybe our chance to get away would be much bigger. How do we know that getting away from Tuscaloosa and Rosswood is going to help?”

“We don’t, but we have to take the chance no matter how slim it is.”

Tim affirmed to you, nodding slightly. A small veterinarian clinic came into view, and Tim pulled in, squinting his eyes at a tall man who was standing outside the front entrance.

The man seemed taller than Tim, slim and definitely fitting the look of a doctor, no matter if it was for animals or humans. His hair was black, slightly curly and slightly long, swept back to kiss at the back of his neck. He was wearing a black polo tucked into black jeans; black cowboy boots peeking out from the cuffs of his jeans.

He wore a watch on his right wrist and a ring adorned his right ring finger, making Tim wonder if the man was engaged. From what Tim could see, the man also had a bit of stubble with hazel eyes to match.

Tim didn’t like him almost immediately.

You seemed to light up a bit, and when Tim pulled in, you got out, waving at the man.

“Hello, John.”

John whistled, looking you up and down and smiling widely.

“Wow, (Y/n)! You’ve changed a lot since college! It’s so nice to see you again.”

He brought you into a hug, and you politely reciprocated. Tim got out, giving the man a look despite John not looking at him. John pulled back to greet Tim, nodding to him and holding his hand out for Tim to shake.

“Ah, you must be the famous Tim Wright. (Y/n) used to gush about you all the time during college and our occasional online chats.”

“John!”

You were red in the face, and Tim had to hold in a snort. Shaking the man’s hand, Tim was still stiff, unease in his bones.

“Yeah, that’s me.”

John nodded at Tim politely before asking you, looking into the car.

“So, what’s this favor you need? Got an animal in need?”

“If I count as an animal, then yes.”

You replied bluntly. John tilted his head before you sighed and turned around, lifting your hair to show your wound. John’s eyes bugged from his head.

“Jesus Christ, (Y/n)! What the fuck happened? Come inside!”

He began to guide you inside, and Tim was left to trail behind, glaring at the man’s hand. Jesus, he shouldn’t be feeling jealous that this man was touching you. He was just trying to help…but Tim couldn’t help but feel this way. Was he jealous because he couldn’t help you the way John could?

The vet clinic was dark, only a few lights from signs in the hallway illuminating the way, and John asked as he guided you into a room.

“Why did you come to me? You need a hospital. What if you have brain damage?”

“Funny, Tim asked me the same thing.”

John gave you a look, almost like a father scolding a child and he wagged a finger at you as he began to grab the utensils needed to administer the stitches.

“You should probably start listening to him more then. I’m just a veterinarian, (Nickname). I can’t heal human wounds like I can with animals.”

Tim gave you a look and added.

“He has a good point there, (Y/n).”

You stuck your tongue out at Tim, and he rolled his eyes at you. John ordered.

“I need you to lay face-first on the table. Try to be still as possible, okay?”

You nodded before doing as told, and John warned as he began to prepare to give you some local anesthetic.

“This is gonna hurt a bit, okay? I’m just gonna numb the area while you tell me what the fuck happened to you.”

You fluttered your hand out for Tim, and Tim took your hand gently as you squeezed your eyes shut. You were shaking, and Tim wondered if it was because of the needle.

“Um, well Tim and I were just dickin around in the woods and I fell. I didn’t want to go to the hospital because I really can’t afford to pay any hospital bills.”

John gave Tim a look.

“’Dickin around in the woods,’ huh?”

“We weren’t fucking, if that’s what you are implying, John.”

John choked a bit as Tim widened his eyes at your boldness.

“That’s not what I…nevermind. Seriously, though, why would you two be wandering the woods at night?”

“It’s easier to see the stars in less populated areas.”

Came your simple reply. Tim was surprised at how easy lying came to you. John was buying your story, and as he began to work on your stitches, he decided to change the subject.

“What’s been going on with you lately? Still working that run-down 9-to-5?”

You replied softly, eyes closing as you tried to relax.

“Not anymore. I quit yesterday.”

“Must have been rough then. Hadn’t you worked there for a year?”

You nodded, and John seemed to perk up, looking over to Tim as if remembering he was there.

“What about you, Tim? How’s life been treating you?”

Tim replied curtly.

“Just fine.”

John nodded, as if understanding that Tim wasn’t really interested in getting to know him at the moment. You gave Tim a look that begged him to be nice, but Tim couldn’t shake the irritation. John was quiet for a moment before assessing your wound.

“Your wound isn’t too deep, thankfully enough. You should be fine after a lot of bed rest, but be careful not to take too much. We don’t want to risk you falling into a coma should you have a concussion. Has she been showing signs of being concussed?”

Tim shook his head.

“Other than sleeping a lot, she’s been fine. I think she’s just exhausted and probably has the worst migraine of her life.”

You nodded.

“See, I’m fine. No need for a hospital.”

John shook his head.

“You always were such a stubborn woman.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing when I’m the reason you two get out of the trouble that y’all get into.”

Tim cracked a small smile at you, amused but knowing full well that you were completely right. John, however, simply rolled his eyes.

“Whatever makes you sleep at night. You should be okay, though. Just try not to put pressure on the wound and make sure to clean it carefully when you wash your hair.”

You nodded and Tim helped you sit up. Taking off his gloves, John began to clean up and asked.

“Is there anything else that I can do for you two?”

Tim shook his head.

“No, we should be fine. Thank you.”

John nodded before pointing at you.

“You better keep in touch more often.”

You waved your hand at him.

“I’ll try my best, but no promises. I’m a busy woman, you know.”

John chuckled before escorting the two of you out.

“As per usual for you. Get well soon. It was good seeing you again…just wish it was under better circumstances.”

You nodded and waved at him as Tim helped you back to the car.

“Yeah, maybe we can catch up sometime soon. See you around, John.”

John waved, and Tim was quick to peel out of the clinic and get back onto the highway. You poked at his side, saying.

“You could have been a bit less intimidating instead of being a jealous lumberjack in the corner.”

Tim replied, rolling his eyes as he grabbed your hand to get you to stop poking into his side.

“I wasn’t jealous.”

“Say that to the stink eye you were giving him the whole time.”

Tim gave you a look, and you simply smiled at him. Tim shook his head and rubbed his thumb against your skin.

“I wasn’t giving him the stink eye…I just…didn’t like how friendly he was with you.”

You snorted and Tim blushed, muttering as he stared at the road.

“Shut up, we’re not doing this right now.”

You giggled and replied.

“Okay, okay, I won’t try to get you to admit you were jealous seeing as it was written all over your face.”

Tim sighed and said to himself.

“Maybe I should’ve left you there.”

“Aw, leave John and I alone? All alone with nothing to do?”

Tim glared at you, and you giggled before kissing his bearded cheek.

“Come on, I’m only playing. You’re the only lumberjack I need.”

Tim asked you, playfully exasperated.

“Would you stop with the lumberjack jokes?”

“No.”

Tim just groaned as you giggled, finding the nearest hotel as quick as he could.

-TIMESKIP-

Tim sighed as he let his head hang under the spray of the shower, the hot water steaming heavily around him. His skin was red from where the scalding hot water ran over him, but Tim couldn’t care. The burn was nice, and it took his mind off of his worries for a bit.

You had decided that you didn’t want a shower, so Tim had decided to take one. You had chosen to take both his and your clothes so that you could wash them, and from the sound of it, you had just gotten back.

Tim shut the water off, drying off with the provided towels before tying one around his waist. Walking out of the bathroom, Tim watched you for a second as you gingerly folded his clothes while in just your underwear and bra. The robe you had snagged from the bathroom sat draped on the office chair, temporarily forgotten as you folded the clothes.

Tim smiled lightly as you hummed lightly to yourself and placed the clothes on the dresser. Catching his gaze, you blinked and asked him, crossing your arms.

“What? Stop staring at me, you weirdo.”

Tim chuckled before coming over to you, leaning down and softly kissing your lips. You were shy, but gently kissed him back, placing your hands on his damp biceps. Pulling away, Tim kept his forehead resting against yours. He said to you quietly.

“Thank you for washing my clothes.”

You smiled lightly and replied, poking his stomach.

“Well, you don’t wanna be parading around smelling like a dumpster, do you?”

Tim chuckled before his hands came down to your hips, his lips gracing against yours again as he gently kneaded the flesh within his palms. You sighed lightly, your body relaxing against his, and Tim’s own tension seemed to melt away. Tim’s body was getting hot as he continued to kiss you, his tongue intertwining with yours, his hands running up your sides and just feeling you. How long was it that you and Tim had been able to be intimate with your hectic schedules?

Though, as much as Tim wanted to continue, he knew he couldn’t risk hurting you or irritating your wound. Knowing him, he would forget about your stitches and get too rough with you. Tim pulled away, his eyes closed and breathing heavy, his forehead against yours. 

You were nuzzling him, fingertips scratching at the back of his neck and tickling at his hair as your lips gently kissed his cheek and moving down his jawline. His hands gripped your hips, keeping you against him as he let out a shaky breath, and you asked quietly.

“Are you okay?”

Tim nodded and replied, his voice shaky.

“Yes, I’m fine. I just…don’t want to risk hurting you. Maybe once your wound is healed more…okay?”

You nodded and kissed his cheek.

“It’s okay, Tim. I understand.”

Tim nodded and he mumbled.

“I’ll…be right back.”

You nodded and Tim was quick to go back into the bathroom. You giggled slightly before climbing into the bed, burying yourself under the covers as you waited for Tim to finish. A couple minutes later, Tim came back out, his face flushed. He was in his boxers now, and Tim climbed into the bed, scooting close to you. Laying his hand on your hip, you turned to face him. Your noses were touching, eyes gazing into each others, and you whispered to him.

“Will you show me tomorrow?”

Tim felt his chest tighten slightly. Was he ready to show you the tapes? Was he ready to reveal the secret he had been keeping from you for so long? Was he ready to show you the truth? In the short run, no, he wasn’t. Tim didn’t think he would ever be ready.

However, Tim knew in the deep dark pit of his heart that this would happen one day. He had no other choice than to give you the truth…to show you what he truly was. Tim bit his lip lightly before nodding softly to you.

“Yeah, I’ll show you tomorrow. For now, let’s just get some sleep, okay?”

You nodded before digging your head into his chest, nuzzling him lightly. Tim wrapped his arms around you and held you close, afraid that you would disappear within the night as he slept.

He did not sleep easy this night.

[TBC]

[scullyfemme]

Timing -- Ch. 4

 “Would you believe it was supposed to be romantic?”

Scully buries herself in Christmas preparations and Mulder decides to try and distract her from thoughts of last year. Hopefully they can make it home before her mother's Christmas party in the morning.

Tagging @today-in-fic | Read it on Ao3

<- Previous Chapter | Start from the Beginning | Next Chapter ->

---

After carefully tearing up his apartment in search of bugs (and then cleaning everything up at Scully’s behest), Mulder decided to keep the new bed. The two started splitting their time a bit more evenly between their apartments now that Scully could properly sleep at his place, and they rarely ever spent a night apart. 

As good as it was going, their relationship wasn’t perfect. One particular week was full of arguments and near-lateness to work after Mulder had accidentally snoozed Scully's alarm on a few separate occasions. Afterwards, she bought two new alarm clocks: one for Mulder to use at her place, and one for her to use at his. It was the sensible thing to do anyway, since she woke up earlier than him and couldn’t risk him turning off her alarm anymore. Mulder offered to pay her back for at least one of the clocks, but she just shrugged it off.

They argued about other things, too. Little things, mostly. Surprisingly, after so many years of working together and being in each others’ spaces so much, there was still a lot of stuff to navigate in this new phase of their relationship. Mulder left hair in the sink. Scully left her shoes wherever she removed them. His fridge was never stocked with anything other than leftover takeout and beer. Her stuff took up too much room in his shower.

But as much as they argued, none of it put their relationship any in real danger. In a strange way, bickering over trivial matters like whose toothbrush was whose (Mulder had two identical ones in his bathroom) lightened their relationship. When two people spend their lives with the weight of the world on their shoulders, the ability to spar over the fact that Scully put his things away in her apartment without telling him where they were (“Why are my ties in your closet?” “Mulder, they’re supposed to be hung up”) or how bad the coffee she owned was (“Mulder, after all the shitty diners we’ve eaten at, I’m surprised you still have any standards for coffee”) felt almost like a weird blessing. A way to remember that under the conspiracies and experiments and edges that had been sharpened over the years, they were still two people. Two humans.

With the events at Area 51 forgotten by everyone involved, their relationship was no longer on the Lone Gunmens’ radar (not that they knew it ever was). Scully’s mother, however, seemed to notice a change in her daughter during a lunch with her. She seemed happier, more easygoing.

“So, how’s work?” Maggie asked, trying to figure out why there was a more jovial air around her daughter all of a sudden. 

“Uh,” Dana sighed and seemed to deflate a bit. “Not great. We had to investigate more manure cases this week.” She made a face and toyed with her salad.

Maggie nodded thoughtfully. Not work, then. “How’s Fox?”

Her daughter stiffened almost imperceptibly at that. “Mulder’s fine,” She said, her voice just a bit too high-pitched to be normal. An overshot effort to sound casual.

Maggie eyed her. Ah. “Are you two...still partners?”

“Mhm,” She nodded too emphatically, not even looking at her mother.

Maggie narrowed her eyes, trying to study her daughter for any clues as to what was going on. She knew better than to ask — or even think — that the two of them might be romantically involved. Dana had stated countless times that nothing was going to happen there, and Maggie had given up asking. But still, something was different with her daughter, and she had a feeling Fox was involved.

There was no getting Dana to talk if she didn’t want to, though. Oh well. Best to just wait to see if she would talk on her own.

---

Once December set off, Scully launched herself into full holiday mode. Decorations, presents, cards, church. If it had to do with Christmas, she buried herself in it. Some days she was overly cheery, others she was extremely serious — as if the type of wrapping paper she used for Matthew’s present was a life-or-death situation.

It was strange, coming into her apartment to see her covered in flour for the umpteenth time as she tried out yet another destined-to-fail Christmas cookie recipe. She wasn’t a great baker and seemed to know it, but she kept insisting on trying. Unwilling to fail and determined to make cookies for her mother for whatever reason.

It always went the same. Mulder would lie and say they tasted good. She would chide him for lying to her because she already knew they were awful. She would heave a sigh, dump the cookies in the trash, dust herself off, and start cleaning the kitchen. He would help clean where he could, but mainly stayed out of her way. And she would try again tomorrow, or whenever she was free.

Frightening as it was to see her like this, Mulder knew what she was doing. It had been a year since the events involving Emily. Scully was trying to put it out of her mind, trying to bury the bad memories with busywork and fake Christmas cheer. He didn’t want to pry her about it; dredging it up wouldn’t help her now. If she wanted to forget, he would help her forget. So he went along with her for nearly everything else, too. Present-shopping, decorating her apartment. He even offered to go to church with her at one point, but she thought he was joking and insisted on going alone. 

He wanted to do more for her, though. Maybe a date. A unique one. Not an X-File, or at least not anything resembling a case. She wouldn’t want to work one so close to Christmas and she would no doubt bring up the fact that they weren't working X-Files anymore. Maybe something X-Files-adjacent, though. Not a full case, but more like...an attraction. A field trip.

Maybe there was a haunted house in the area.

---

Mulder always felt out of place in the department store. It wasn’t because he felt awkward tailing Scully while she shopped for her last few gifts. In fact, it was quite the opposite. He was happy to follow her around and he had fun giving unwanted input on gifts for family members he’d never heard of. He could tell it amused her too.5hh

No, he felt out of place because it always seemed like every other man here looked like they’d rather die than be gift shopping with their significant others. They trudged along behind their wives and girlfriends and merely shrugged when asked for input on items. It was especially worse today, on Christmas Eve. No one seemed to be enjoying their last-minute shopping.

He supposed he should give the other men the benefit of the doubt, but then a few of them would try to exchange knowing looks with Mulder over what they interpreted as a shared negative experience. Shackled to the old ball-and-chain while she shops. He simply shot them a confused look and then leaned over to point out to Scully that blue throw pillows would probably look better with Cousin Lucy’s living room set.

“Mulder, you’ve never even met Lucy.”

“No, but I can see her living room in my mind’s eye.” There was a gleam in his eye. “It’s, uh, it’s nautical-themed. Little decorative anchors on the walls and those, uh, those clear vases full of sand and seashells. So...blue.”

She eyed him humorously. “Mulder, Lucy is afraid of the ocean. I can assure you that nothing in her house is nautical-themed.”

“Oh.” He grinned good-naturedly. “Then go with the red ones.”

A half-hour later, they had moved on to the kitchenware section of the store.

“Hey, Scully,” Mulder started off cautiously as he watched her pore over two pans — one silver and one copper. She'd already gotten three things for her mom, but she’d noticed the sale on pans and commented how her mother needed a new one. “How do you feel about a...little field trip later?”

“Hm?” She didn’t look up from the items and it was apparent that she wasn’t listening. After a moment, though, the question seemed to register in her mind and she looked up. “What do you mean, ‘field trip?’”

He hesitated, then took the silver pan from her left hand. “Your mom’ll like this one better. It matches the rest of her stuff.” He turned on his heel and walked away.

“Mulder, what field trip?” She put the other pan down and followed him out of the kitchen section. “It’s Christmas Eve, this better not be some X-Files goose chase. And how do you know what my mom’s kitchenware looks like?”

“I’ve been to her house before, haven’t I?” He stopped and turned to face her. “And it’s not an X-File, it’s… Well…” He tilted his head and grimaced.

“It is an X-File.” She knew what that grimace meant.

“Not a case. Just...phenomena.”

“Phenomena,” she repeated, reluctance on her face. “Mulder…”

“Look, we’re almost done here, right?” He straightened up, gesturing to the multiple items they were both holding. “Just a few more gifts, and then we’re good to go. The night’s still young and we’ll be there and back within plenty of time.”

She shook her head. “Mulder...I’ve-I’ve still got to wrap all this.”

“I’ll help you wrap.”

“It’s too far away.”

“You don’t even know where it is.”

“Well, where is it?”

“Only an hour’s drive.”

She licked her lips in thought and he knew he was close to winning.

“We’ve got family roll under the tree at six in the morning,” she argued. “For my mom’s Christmas party, remember? The one you didn’t even tell me you were going to?”

He smiled. Her mother had invited him over for Christmas nearly every year since they’d started working together. This was just the first year he’d accepted.

“Like I said, we’ll be there and back in plenty of time. C’mon, Scully, it’ll be fun.”

She glowered at him — the one that meant he'd won but she didn't want to admit it yet — then pushed past him to make her way to the candle section, where she started browsing. He followed her and stood right behind her, nearly touching her. Too close for her not to notice his presence. She ignored him though, pretending that the weird candle names were fascinating full-length novels.

After a few moments, she heaved another sigh and rounded on him, then nearly backed into the candle display when she realized just how close he was.

“Mulder-” She pressed a hand to his chest and pushed him back a bit, giving herself space. “What kind of phenomena are you even talking about?”

He gave her a toothy grin. “Have you heard the Tale of the Star-Crossed Lovers?”

---

“‘Cause you’re a lonely man,” the old man said to Mulder. “A lonely man chasing paramasturbatory illusions that you believe will give your life meaning and significance and which your pathetic social maladjustment makes impossible for you to find elsewhere. You probably consider yourself passionate, serious, misunderstood. Am I right?”

Mulder blinked. “‘Paramasturbatory?’”

“Most people would rather stick their fingers in a wall socket than spend a minute with you.”

Ouch. “Alright now, just uh...” Mulder held up his hands to stop the man. Who did he think he was? “Just back off for a second.”

The man didn’t back off, though. “Spend every Christmas this way? Alone?”

Ha. That was where he was wrong. “I’m not alone.” Mulder raised his chin in confidence.

The old man looked around at the room that was otherwise empty besides the two of them. “More self-delusions.”

“No, I came here with my partner. She’s somewhere in the house.”

“Behind a brick wall?” The man gestured towards the brick wall.

Mulder smiled and nodded.

“How’d you get her to come with you? Steal her car keys?”

His smile turned confused. “No, I asked if she wanted to come.”

“Did you ask her or did you pester her until she gave in?”

The smile dropped from his face. 

“You know why you do it.” The old man shook his head as if disappointed in him. “Listen endlessly to her droning rationalizations. ‘Cause you’re afraid. Afraid of the loneliness. Am I right?”

Was he? It was getting harder and harder to dismiss the man’s analysis. He pushed the thought out of his mind.

After a moment, he finally spoke. “I’d just like to find my partner.”

---

“Oh, you poor child.” The old woman clutched her robe closed around her neck and stepped towards Scully. “You must have an awful small life. Spending your Christmas Eve with him. Running around chasing things you don’t even believe in.”

“Don’t come any closer.” Scully’s gun shook in her hand. Whoever this woman was, she was suspicious. And she certainly didn’t need pity from some old woman who didn’t know her.

The woman ignored her, stepping closer anyway. “I can see it in your face. The fear. The conflicted yearnings. A subconscious desire to find fulfillment through another.” She took another step. “Intimacy through co-dependency.”

“What?” Scully’s panic gave way to incredulity. What the hell was she talking about? Intimacy through what? Conflicted yearnings?

“Maybe you repress the truth about why you’re really here,” the old woman continued. “Pretending it’s out of duty or loyalty. Unable to admit your dirty little secret.”

Scully tensed. Dirty little secret?

“Your only joy in life is proving him wrong.”

---

“Do you realize how seriously disturbed that man is?” The old man asked. “How dark and lonely? What he's capable of?”

Scully simply blinked at him, unsure how to respond. This man was crazy. Mulder wasn’t dark and lonely, despite how much he might think of himself as such. Hell, only a couple of hours ago he was helping her pick out a new pan for her mother in a department store. Mulder may be spooky — and a little out there — but he was far from disturbed.

Someone pounded at the door. “Scully?”

“Mulder!” She started towards the door.

“Did he happen to mention a story about a lovers’ pact?” The man asked.

Scully froze. Mulder had told her the story. But surely he hadn’t brought her here for reasons like that. This was just some...eccentric Christmas Eve X-Files date, or something. 

Right?

“The man is acting out an unconscious yearning,” the old man continued. “The deep-seated terror of being alone.”

“Scully!” Mulder’s voice sounded from the other side of the door again. “Scully, are you there?”

“I’m here, Mulder!” She called out, keeping her gun trained on the old man.

“Open the door, Scully!”

“Open the door,” she commanded.

The old man reluctantly obliged. Mulder entered, gun at the ready. “Where’s Scully?”

“Mulder?” She couldn’t help the flood of relief at seeing him.

But then he turned and fired his gun at her.

Scully flinched as the bullet missed her by a mile. Shaking with panic, she aimed her gun at him despite the fact that she knew she wouldn’t shoot him. “Mulder, what are you doing?”

He fired again, missing her. He wasn’t normally this bad a shot, but she was freaking out too much to really register that.

“Mulder!”

“There’s no getting out of here, Scully.” He had a deranged look in his eyes. “There’s no way home.” He shot again, hitting the wall behind her.

“Mulder, come on,” She moved sideways across the room to make herself a more difficult target. He stepped towards her. “Mulder, you’re scaring me. Put the gun down!”

“You gonna shoot me?!” He shouted.

“I’m not gonna shoot you! I don’t wanna shoot you!” She shouted back, trembling. Did he really think she would shoot him? What the hell was wrong with him?

“It’s me or you,” he ranted maniacally. “You or me. One of us has to do it.”

“Neither of us has to do it,” she countered. “Just- Just put the gun down!” 

He ignored her, instead focusing his aim.

“Wait!” She tried to calm her breathing. “Look,” Scully took her finger off the trigger and put her hands up in surrender, gun pointed away from him. When she spoke again, it was with a calmer voice. “Please, Mulder. I’m not gonna shoot you. I’m putting my gun down, see?” She started to lower her weapon. “This isn’t you, Mulder. Please, you have to trust me. You have to snap out of...whatever this is.”

A confused look flashed across Mulder’s face and he lowered his weapon a bit, glancing over at the old man.

“Mulder.” She holstered her gun and took a step towards him. He watched her warily, looking almost like a caged animal. Another couple of steps and she was able to put her hand on his wrist, lowering it even more. She searched his face for any sign that he was coming to his senses.

Mulder glanced down at where her hand lingered on his wrist and she pulled it away self-consciously. He looked back up at her. “Scully…do you love me?”

She blinked in surprise. “What?”

“I love you,” he said, moving closer to her.

Scully backed away. “Mulder, what are you doing?” This wasn't like him. She couldn’t help glancing at the old man again, who looked particularly interested in what was going on.

Mulder’s hand on her shoulder brought her attention back to him. He leaned down.

“Mulder-”

She was interrupted by the feeling of his gun pressed into her stomach.

“Merry Christmas, Scully.”

CRACK

---

Mulder stumbled down the stairs, unsure how he was able to move when he was in so much pain. At the bottom, he noticed a trail of blood in the foyer. He collapsed onto the floor and started crawling pathetically, following the trail. Around the corner, he spotted Scully crawling towards the front door in a similar fashion.

“Scully?” His voice was strained.

She flinched, then slowly, painfully rolled over and pointed her gun at him. Was she really going to shoot him again? He grunted and managed to pull out his own gun despite the fact he knew he could never shoot her.

They stayed in their stalemate for a few moments before Scully lowered her weapon with a groan and fell back on the floor. “Ah...I’m not gonna make it,” she said.

“You should have thought of this.”

“You should have,” she countered.

“You shot me first!”

“I never shot you, you shot me!”

Mulder blinked. He never shot her. Why did she think he shot her? And she was claiming she’d never shot him.

It hit him. Lyda and Maurice. It was another trick. Of course it was.

As if undoing some spell, Mulder realized he wasn’t actually bleeding. He wasn’t actually shot, he wasn’t in any pain. It wasn't real.

“Scully,” He rolled over and stood up, feeling considerably light. He grinned. “Get up.”

She scoffed, obviously thinking he was crazy. “I can’t.”

“Get up.” He moved towards her and showed her how he was fine. “You’re not shot.”

She looked up at him with disbelief. “What?”

“Come on, it’s a trick. It’s all in your head.” He reached down and helped her up. Once standing, she started patting at her abdomen in search of the bullet wound. She looked up at him in alarm, and they both glanced back towards the inside of the house as their hands sought each other and they took off through the front door. They escaped from the haunted house hand in hand, only pulling apart to get in his car and drive away in a panic.

“Maybe it was a hallucination,” Scully said, her brain whirring at high speeds to search for an explanation. “Some sort of chemical could have been in that fog.”

“What kind of hallucinogen wears off once you realize it’s not real?” He countered.

She opened her mouth to argue, then closed it when she couldn’t think of one. “Then it was, uh... It was all in our heads, I don’t know! But whatever happened in there, you owe me for it.”

“Owe you? You shot me!” He joked. 

“No I didn’t, and besides, you shot me first!”

“I never shot you.”

“Well, you dragged me out here in the first place.”

“Well, I-” He stopped and glanced over at her. “Would you believe it was supposed to be romantic?”

She chuckled, feeling a bit giddy from the adrenaline. “From you? I’d believe it.” 

He smiled to himself.

She sighed and leaned back in her seat, feeling her heart rate ease up a bit. “Only you would see a haunted house with stories about multiple couples killing themselves in it and think of it as a romantic destination.”

He chuckled. “Are you saying you didn’t find it romantic?”

“Mulder, you shot me.”

“I told you, that wasn’t me!” He grinned.

“Well, I still thought it was at the time. And I wouldn't call it a pleasant experience.”

“I would never shoot you, Scully.”

“How romantic.”

“Of course, I know you can’t say the same since you’ve shot me before.”

“You were about to kill a man!” She argued. “I shot you to protect you.”

“Yeah, and then you dragged me out to New Mexico and I got blown up.”

“You lived, didn’t you?”

He laughed. Whatever had happened in there, they were alive. And her mind certainly seemed to be occupied with something other than last year's Christmas. Maybe a near-death experience wasn't the best replacement, but at least it was something.

Scully checked the time. “God, it’s already past midnight.” She sighed and let her head fall back against the seat again.

“It is?” He glanced over at her and saw that her eyes were closed. 

She nodded tiredly.

“Well...Merry Christmas.”

Her eyes snapped open in realization and she looked over at him with a small smile. “Merry Christmas, Mulder.”

---

They made it back to her apartment in one piece and were up for another hour wrapping presents. When they were done, they trudged to bed, falling asleep almost immediately. When her alarm went off too soon, they both groaned, having only gotten a few hours' sleep. Somehow, though, they managed to get up and make it to her mother's.

Christmas with the Scullys was more fun than Mulder had imagined it would be. He found himself wishing that he’d taken Mrs. Scully up on her invitation years ago.

The 6am roll call was only for immediate family, apparently. With Melissa gone and Charles off closing deals in Europe, this meant that it was just Scully, her mother, Bill Jr., and his wife and kid. And Mulder.

“Fox!” Mrs. Scully pulled him in for a warm hug as she answered the door. “So glad you could come.”

“Sorry, which one of us is your kid?” Scully poked her head out from behind him.

“Oh, Dana,” Her mother jokingly chastised her before also pulling her in for a hug. “He was just the first one to walk in, is all.”

“Mhm.”

“Come in, come in,” Mrs. Scully quickly took the bags of presents from the couple without giving them an opportunity to object. She led them into the living room, where Bill and Tara were already sitting on the couch. Bill shook Mulder’s hand with a stiff smile and Scully wondered if her mother had lectured him about being nice before they'd arrived.

Without much preamble and small-talk, they opened presents. Scully had gotten Mulder Resident Evil 2 (“Langly told me you liked the first one” "You'd like it too, Scully. It's horror") and he’d gotten her the bottle of perfume that she’d always sampled whenever they were out shopping at the mall for presents.

“Perfume?” Bill asked, sounding unimpressed.

“I love it.” She gave her brother a pointed look before smiling gratefully at Mulder. She’d half-expected him to get her something obscure like that keychain from a few years back. “I wanted this one.”

Bill didn’t make any more comments after that.

At eight, the cousins and family friends started pouring in. Mulder was flabbergasted. He knew Scully’s family was Irish Catholic, but he’d never fully registered how that would apply to her extended family as well. He supposed he should have, considering how many presents he’d helped her buy for cousins. It was hectic and impossible to keep up with names, so he avoided using them. He stuck to Scully’s side like a burr, letting her navigate them through the party.

“I’m sorry, what did you say your name was?” A man asked.

“Fox Mulder.”

“Fox? That’s an interesting name. And how do you two know each other?”

“Oh, we’re p- We work together,” He said, not wanting to cause any confusion.

“Ohh,” The man nodded. “At the...CIA?”

“FBI,” Scully corrected, evidently not very close to this particular cousin. Was he even a cousin? Mulder had no idea who was related to her and who wasn’t.

A woman — another cousin? — who had overheard their conversation leaned in to join them. “And are you two...together?” She asked curiously.

Scully’s cheeks turned ever-so-slightly pink. “No.”

“No, we’re just good friends.” Mulder took over, slinging a friendly arm around her shoulders. “I mean, after being partners for over five years, you either hate each other or you’re best friends, am I right?”

The other two both laughed and Scully gave a little chuckle too, looking more relaxed. They continued their conversation, but Mulder didn’t remove his arm from her shoulders. After a while, Scully realized that she had been leaning comfortably into Mulder’s side for who knows how long and quickly straightened up, slipping out of his grasp and excusing herself to go to the kitchen and get some eggnog. She ducked her head in hopes of hiding how red her face must be.

Alone in the kitchen, she braced herself on the counter and took a deep breath, trying to calm down. It was stupid of her to panic like this, but she couldn’t help it. This was their first time out somewhere like this after getting together, but they couldn’t even act like a couple. It was too easy to relax with Mulder, and it was too fun being at a party with him. She was being too obvious and people were going to figure out they were together.

But on the other hand, it would be nice if they could actually act like a couple at this party. Would it really be the worst thing in the world if people knew? Keeping it a secret at work made sense, but it felt different at her mother's house in front of friends and family.

“Dana?” Her mother’s voice shook her from her thoughts. She was standing in the doorway with a concerned look on her face. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah, Mom, I’m fine,” She said, quickly straightening up and grabbing a cup.

“Sorry,” her mother said. “I just...noticed you left that conversation with Michael and Hannah pretty quickly. I was worried they said something to upset you.”

“Nope,” Scully smiled — a bit too widely. “Just getting some eggnog." She grabbed a second cup.

“For you and Fox?”

Scully stiffened ever so slightly. Was her mother implying something? Or was she just being paranoid? “Yeah, he wanted some too.” She tried to sound casual.

Her mother seemed like she wanted to say something but apparently dropped it, instead moving over to give her daughter a comforting pat on the shoulders. “Okay, honey.” She smiled. “I’ll see you back out there, okay?”

Scully nodded, not meeting her mother’s gaze. After she was gone, Scully leaned on the counter again. Was her mother suspicious of them? Was anyone else? Why was this so stressful? All she wanted to do was relax, to be casual and have fun with him in this setting, but she didn’t know how to do that.

After another bracing breath, Scully picked up both cups and headed out of the kitchen. She almost ran into Mulder in the doorway.

“Oh!” She yanked the cups back with a grimace until she realized they hadn’t spilled, then let out a sigh of relief.

Mulder, who had also pulled back to avoid an accident, leaned forward a bit. “Sorry, Scully. I was just checking on you. You left pretty suddenly.”

She nodded. “I’m okay, I just-”

“Mistletoe!” Someone shouted, interrupting her. Nearly everyone’s attention turned to them. Scully’s eyes widened and her face burned as her gaze slowly rose up. Sure enough, there was some mistletoe hanging above them in the doorway. Shit.

“You guys gotta kiss!” Someone else shouted in a heavy Boston accent.

“N-No,” They both started protesting, then Scully’s mother appeared out of nowhere and whisked away the two cups Scully had been holding.

“Mom!”

“Sorry, Dana, rules are rules.” Her mother gave a fake sympathetic smile.

“She’s not sorry at all,” Scully muttered, half-believing that her mother had planned this somehow. Various people were shouting for them to kiss now.

“I don’t think we’re gonna get out of this, Scully,” Mulder said out of the side of his mouth.

She heaved a sigh, her hands on her hips, then gave him a quick nod of assent. Needing no more permission, he stooped down and pressed his lips to hers in a chaste kiss. More chaste than most of theirs had been since the very first. It was still nice, though, and Scully had to dig her fingers into her own hips to prevent herself from reaching out to him instinctively. She had a feeling he was having the same struggle.

They broke apart to the sounds of whoops and cheers, their eyes lingering on each others’ for just a moment before they turned back to face the party, their facades back in place.

Everyone quickly went back to whatever they had been doing before the interruption (Bill took the time to stare daggers at Mulder for a few more moments) and Scully’s mother handed them back their drinks. Scully couldn’t down her eggnog fast enough, grateful for the alcohol in it.

---

Maggie Scully studied her daughter and Fox throughout the day, only half-listening to conversations with family and friends. She noticed subtle differences from how she’d seen them act before. Dana would grab Fox’s arm to lead him to the next conversation, but her hand would linger longer than it needed to, her thumb even lightly rubbing his arm. He would bend down to whisper in her ear a lot, his mouth closer than it needed to be, and Dana always smiled at whatever he said. And above everything else, they stuck extraordinarily close to each other the whole time. Even if Fox looked like he was fully engaged in a conversation with someone, he would quickly follow Dana if she moved away.

Maggie smiled to herself and let out a little hum, certain that something was going on between those two. For now, she was satisfied with that much knowledge. She’d give Dana as long as she needed to tell her about it.

At one point, Matthew came charging into the room with the unstoppable momentum of a toddler who had recently figured out walking. Scully caught him easily, using his momentum to swing him up in the air before landing him squarely on her hip. “Where do you think you’re going?” She teased her nephew with a grin.

Matthew just laughed and clapped his hands in the way babies do.

“Are you trying to find your mama?” Scully asked, turning to look around the room. When she couldn’t find Bill or Tara, she turned to Mulder with a questioning look. He also did a sweep of the room — hoping his height would give him more insight — and then shrugged.

“Well,” Scully carried Matthew over to the couch and sat down, holding him on her lap. “We’re just gonna have to wait right here for them.”

Mulder sat down next to her and watched as she entertained the baby with faces and little games. She was like a completely different person around kids, and he couldn’t help smiling fondly as he watched her.

It also broke his heart, though. Knowing what had been done to her. What had been taken from her. He knew he had to tell her about the vial of her ova, and soon. He’d put it off too long already and she deserved to know.

But not today. He wasn’t going to let her have two ruined Christmases in a row.

After a while, he realized one of Matthew’s toys was on the coffee table in front of him. He grabbed it, offering it up to the boy and then pulling away, which made the baby squeal in entertainment. Mulder played this game with him for a while, not noticing the smile of adoration that Scully was giving him.

Across the room, Maggie looked on at the sight of the two of them with the baby and couldn’t help thinking how much it suited them.

---

After Bill and Tara returned (they had stepped out to get more ice) and Matthew was handed off, Mulder and Scully returned to mingling. She drank more eggnog than he thought her small frame would allow, and by the end of the day she was leaning against him and hugging his arm without a care in the world for who saw, smiling and blinking slowly at whatever a family friend was saying.

Dinner was a buffet-style potluck, and the food in her stomach seemed to sober her up some, but she was still visibly tipsy if not drunk. Afterwards, Mulder kept his arm around her — more to keep her upright than anything else.

“FBI, huh?” Someone asked. “Do you guys get any interesting cases?”

Scully gave an exaggerated frown. “Well, last night we went ghostbusting.” Her chin ducked down and then back up. “But that wasn’t an official case.”

“Ghostbusting?”

“Well, they weren’t really ghosts of course,” She said emphatically, and Mulder couldn’t help smiling at how insistent she was, even in an inebriated state. “Mulder probably thinks they were.” She tapped her head against his chest. “But I know” — she pointed at herself — “that it was just...a hallucination or something. Brought on by the...the creepy atmosphere and our heightened senses of-of panic.”

“...Oh.” The man looked visibly confused by what she was saying. “So...what exactly were you guys doing ghostbusting on Christmas Eve?”

---

After the party was over, Mulder guided a still-tipsy Scully to the car, helping her buckle in before getting in the driver’s side, then waved a final goodbye to her mother.

As he started the car and drove off, Scully smiled lazily at him, her head resting against the seat. “Thanks for today, Mulder. I had a lot more fun than I usually do.”

“I like your family,” He said. “Most of them. I never really, uh...got the whole family thing. Especially not after Samantha disappeared.”

She pouted. “I’m sorry.”

He chuckled. “It’s okay. Today was fun to experience. Even if it was a one-time-only thing.”

“What makes you think it’ll be one-time only?” She asked. “My mom’s definitely gonna invite you again next year.”

Mulder smiled at the thought. He hadn’t considered next year. Or the year after. He let himself indulge for a moment, imagining a future where he and Scully were happy. Staying together, attending her mother’s Christmas parties every year. Their situation was still hard for him to believe; he kept waking up expecting to find that it had been a dream, or that she’d changed her mind, only to see her sleeping soundly, pressed close to him. Or already awake and watching him with an adoring look that she only used when she thought he couldn't see.

“I really- I really do love you, Mulder,” Scully spoke up after a while, as if reading his thoughts and knowing his insecurities.

He laughed. “You’re drunk.”

“No,” She lifted her head off the seat and glared at him comically. “I’m not drunk, I’m just enjoying myself. And you’re the best…” She waved her hand dismissively a few times. “Partner, boyfriend, whatever.”

He grimaced. “I think I like partner better than boyfriend.” He wasn't too fond of partner, either. It fit them in a professional sense, but not outside of that.

“Mmm, but partner doesn’t feel right either,” She seemed to voice his thoughts as she pouted again, leaning back against the headrest.

“Then what does?”

She was silent for a few moments, then shrugged. “I dunno. You’re just...Mulder.”

He nodded, knowing what she meant. Of all the ways to describe their relationship, of all the words to label what they were to each other, his brain often just kept coming back to Scully. That was what she was to him.

“‘Mulder’ isn’t exactly a label you can use to introduce me to people, though,” he joked.

“Mm.” She hummed in acknowledgment and was silent for a moment. Then she sat forward a bit, eyes wide in realization. “Mulder, was I clinging to you a lot tonight?”

He hesitated, which was enough of an answer for her.

“Ohh,” she put her head in her hands. “D’ya think anyone noticed?”

A lot of people definitely noticed, but he didn't want to tell her that. “Well…I think your mom is suspicious.”

“Well, she's been suspicious since she first met you.”

“Yeah?”

She nodded, her face still hidden.

“Bill might've figured it out, too,” he added.

“Bill?!” She looked up at him, then flopped back in her seat. “Nuh-uh. If Bill knew, you wouldn't be alive.”

---

As soon as they got into her apartment, Scully threw her arms around him and planted a kiss on his lips. She’d managed to sober up a bit more during the drive home and had gone from quite tipsy to just tipsy. Mulder pulled away, his hands planted squarely on her shoulders. She pouted, looking sad that he’d pulled away. God, he wished she wouldn't do that. It made it harder to stay away.

“What do you want? You want some water?” He asked, turning his head towards the kitchen.

“Noo.” She toyed with the buttons on his shirt and looked up at him through her lashes. Her intent was very clear.

His breath hitched and he had to clear his throat. He took her hand and pulled it away from his shirt. “I think you need some water and some sleep.”

“Mulderrrr.” She tried to move closer to him, but his hand on her shoulder kept her at arm’s length. She pouted again. Jesus.

“I don’t take advantage of drunk women,” he said.

“I’m not drunk anymore, Mulder, I told you.” She stood up straight as if that proved it. “And I’m not some random girl you found in a bar, we’re already sleeping together.”

“Scully-”

“Mulder, I'm not drunk. I’m just a little tipsy. I’m still aware of my actions and what I’m saying. And I'm very horny.”

Warmth pooled in his stomach at the way she said that, and he was distracted enough that she managed to slip out of his grip and pull him down for a deep kiss, pushing him backwards towards the bedroom and shedding various items of both their clothes on the way there.

It was a very merry Christmas.

---

Weeks later, Mulder drove them both back from Roanoke after finishing the demon baby case. Scully sat in the passenger seat, flipping through the case file and her notes and muttering how it didn’t make sense. She'd already lectured him multiple times on how a woman who's recently given birth couldn't possibly have moved around as much or done as much as Betsy supposedly had, to which he’d just shrugged and said that Betsy wasn’t human. Which, of course, wasn’t an acceptable answer for her.

“Hey, Scully?” He asked, his heartbeat quickening with nerves. 

“Hm?” She licked her lips as she continued looking through the file, not really paying attention to him.

“Remember, uh, last December? When I said why your- How the men who abducted you- Um…” He cursed himself for not practicing this.

She looked up from the file, giving him her full attention now. “How they extracted my ova,” she said bluntly. “Yeah.”

“I, uh…” He sighed. “Scully, there’s something I didn’t tell you.” He glanced over at her, then returned his attention to the road. “The men who were in charge of the lab...one of them let me take a vial of yours.”

“What?” Scully’s voice was quiet with disbelief. “You have them? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Well, I...I took them directly to a specialist who would tell me if they were okay,” He explained, suddenly wishing he hadn’t started this conversation while driving. This wasn't a car conversation.

“I don’t believe this.”

“Scully, you were...you were deathly ill. And I couldn’t bear to give you another piece of bad news.” He looked over at her and saw the pain and fear in her eyes.

“Is that what it was? Bad news?”

His lips pressed together grimly. “They… They said the ova weren't viable.”

She only stared at him, either too stunned or too upset to say anything.

“I-I know I should have told you sooner, Scully,” He said, wanting to apologize, to explain. “I just- You were dying, and then you were in remission and I didn’t want to risk your recovery. And then…” He sighed. “It was just never a good time. It still isn’t.”

“There’s not really a perfect time for this sort of news, Mulder,” she said bitterly.

“I know.” He glanced over at her so she could see his regret. “I’m really sorry, Scully.”

She nodded, looking more downtrodden by the news than mad at him. She put her face in her hands, hiding her emotions even from him, and stayed like that for a few minutes. He didn’t bother her, not wanting to invade her privacy. This really wasn't a car conversation.

After a while, she lifted her head. He could see the gears turning in her mind. She let out a slow, calculated sigh and he knew what she was going to say before she said it. Scully was ever the scientist.

“I want a second opinion.”

He nodded silently, eyes on the road. He didn’t tell her that he did get a second opinion. And a third. And a fourth. After she’d gone into remission, he was desperate to give her more good news. But after consulting nearly every specialist in the city, he gave up. But he knew Scully wanted to find the answers herself, and he wasn’t going to get in the way of that.

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