#the song that changed my life irreversibly

[mspaint-flower]

咲かせて☆恋の花

[missnightshade]

❝ I WILL REMAIN, LOVE ❞

Agatha Harkness x Reader

Requested: Yes!

Summary: Lilia's trial ends with an - almost - irreversible consequence for Agatha's lover.

Warnings: Hurt/comfort. Almost death experience. Mentions of blood, blades and death (aka Rio). Non canon. English not being my first language.

Word count: 2k and something.

The path narrowed as the Coven walked through it. Looking forward at the long-haired witch that had your heart, you felt that Agatha no longer held the confidence she once had while summoning the Witche's Road. Both of you knew, for sure, that the whole song was a catch. A nice, petty, centuries old trap Agatha created in hopes to gain enough power to bring Nicky back.

A witch’s life was never easy. Just as the world was a malleable cruel thing, so was the days that these powerful women had to go through. Things changed between almost four hundred years back and now, walking this makeshift magical road. Nothing was as it used to be. Yet, Agatha was the only constant in all of the eras of your life. One that didn’t need a real label for you to know that, no matter what happened, it was the two of you against the world.

As the time passed and your legs grew tired, your attention shifted to the teen boy. It wasn’t needed for Agatha to tell you that she, too, was suspicious he was the one manipulating all of that. Agatha was powerless, and you knew it wasn’t you. Jen, Alice and Lilia were powerful, but not enough to bend reality to fit their own agenda.

But Teen, or Billy, emanated strong ancient magic. It was applaudable how the seams between his mind and the reality were almost unnoticeable

“He doesn’t know.” you guessed, falling into Agatha’s steps as the rest of the coven stayed behind, carelessly discussing something trivial.

“What gave it away, love?” she smiled, but her mind was far, far away.

“He got himself deadly hurt. He would have to be insanely dumb to trust one of us would cure him.

“Maybe he is just a dumb boy...” Agatha started out playfully, but seeing your serious face, the shine in her eyes died. You hoped for it to come back. “I know. And this makes...everything harder.”

You felt the witch rambling inside, wishing to measure the weight of explaining her worries, but as she opened her mouth, a cold, sickining body passed between the two of you, harshly separating your shoulders. Rio's sinister smile echoed inside your mind, like she could indeed penetrate herself there. As the sharp blade of hers slid down the middle of her tongue, evil, inviting, you felt the path ahead tuneling before you.

“I see you in the next trial, Y/N.”

And right there, towering in front of both of you as Rio skipped happily towards it, was a dim lit castle with its imponent tower screaming at you. Your steps halted, and Agatha almost bumped into you. You couldn't notice as Rio’s aura still held you hostage there, but your partner, your companion, your constant, eyed you as if she could actually force you out of the road. She knew, you knew, but no one dared to say a thing, afraid of the consequences.

Inside the castle, the clothes changed drastically, almost as you were in a disney witches' reunion. A table of tarot reading stood in the middle of the room, and as Teen rounded the corner, Lilia stopped there.

‘It’s my trial. I should read it.”

There was no questioning, but as the first card was laid upwards on the table, a sharp sword crashed down right by your side. Arms full of worry pulled you in, and your body rested against a scared Agatha. Her heartbeat was rapid against your touch, but as you glanced at RIo, she was nowhere to be found. The celling, full of swords, was just now noticed as the trial’s count down began, lowering above the coven’s head.

“I think we need something more...” desesperadly, Agatha took the deck of cards from Lilia. “Imediate.”

She started to lay cards as if her life depended on it. And, at some point, it did. But card after card, mistake after mistake, more and more swords fell. Some not around you, but mostly too close to be safe.

“Agatha!” Teen screamed, stopping her. “It’s not by chance. This has to be done right.”

The deck of cards was, again, in Lilia’s hand. Even though she managed to find out who the reading reading was for, as the last card was placed and the celling stopped lowering, a heartless, mounstruous sound erupted around the room. Agatha looked behind, breathless, pushing you towards the exit that popped open.

“The Seven are here. Hurry. Everyone out!"

Lilia intended to be the last one out, but as Jen pulled her, there was only you, teen, and Agatha behind. You didn’t notice, but a quiet, sly snake rounded the corner of a pillar, morphing quickly into one of Agatha’s old nemeses. The scare made you tremble, steps a mess as you tried to block down an attack with your own powers. A flash of light sent you and them apart, and as the snake met the side of a blade, you met the other, both fallen from the trial. The sharp pain erupted, but looking behind, Agatha was as surrounded by another four of them. Lilia screamed something that only Teen managed to understand, and as he blasted both of you out, the main card was turned upside down, in time only for him to jump out of the door before the whole trial turned and screams of impaled witches were heard.

The instant died down. Nothing besides agitated breaths could be heard between all of the coven members. You, on the other side, could barely hear anything. Agatha’s voice calling for you was far away, and although you tried to answer, you choked in blood, the taste of the ironed fluid filling your mouth.

“What?” Teen asked Alice, who stared at him like a ghost was right above his shoulders. As he held you still, the protection witch could only point out to your own body falling against Billy’s, pale face, coughing blood till your whole figure hit the floor.

Agatha eyes were shining with tears. The leaves from the trees in Salem that spring were vivid, but not like her eyes. At that time, you couldn’t bring yourself to say something as deeply as “I love you” to the Harkness heir. And as your death seeped into your whole existence, the fear of losing her friendship felt...ridiculous. Her tears fell onto your body. Pierced through with Evanora Harkness’ magic for simply being her daughter support, you were sure that there was no better reason to die.

“Please, Sunshine. Stay with me. It will be okay.” Agatha cried and cried, cradling your body into her arms. Holding you for her dear life, your body slowly became more and more heavy against her lap.

“Shh..Aggy. Don’t cry.” you asked, voice barely above a whisper. There was no physical damage, but your insides rotted by the minute. “This is honestly the best option to die. In your arms, you know?”

She scoffed, trying to pull your head up as if a miracle would happen. She was not only sad and griefing but also mad and frustrated.

“Don’t be stupid. You’re not going to die.”

You regarded her tiredly, too tired to even speak. But you knew that there was no way death would collect you before Agatha was sure it wasn’t her fault. And how loved she was.

“Aggy...this is unfruitful. We both know it.” you swallowed your desperation to part ways with the living world. “Just hear me out, Angel. You were the best, best thing I could have in my life. I love you. I’ve always loved you. Don’t forget that. I would die a thousand times in your arms.”

She blinked, tears falling onto your forehead. Last time, your voice grounded her as her own magic saved your from death. But now, as Rio appeared again, there was nothing from you besides the blood that ran to the floor from a large perforation you suffered from falling against the tip of a sword without even noticing in all that commotion. Agatha blamed herself again. You were on the road because of her. Because of her restless search for power. Looking at your pale face and shallow breath almost dissipating, she felt for the first time in her life since her son’s birth that she didn’t need any magic if she could, perhaps, keep you.

“You know you can’t.” Rio’s voice echoed, but as the witches around your lifeless body moved around to recreate the spell used on Billy, Agatha stared at her. “You walked hand in hand with me for so long, Agatha. You, above anyone, should understand how life and death works.“

“Don’t!”, the witches voice screamed back, and the strength it held made Rio stop marching forward. “She can’t die. It’s not her time.”

“But it is.” death answered, showing her half skull face only Agatha could see. “She gave you everything. Her time has been completed.”

“No!” she didn’t plead. Tired of all the centuries serving as a cunt to give her more and more bodies even after having her son taken from her, it felt unfair. “That’s enough.”

Agatha didn’t waste another minute there, succumbing to Rio’s words. She cried out for Jen. Vulnerable, broken, the coven fell into a rhythm of trying the ritual over and over again, but not only the moonlit water fell onto your body, but also your partner’s tears as she was left disheveled from pleading to the Mother to keep your life. It was a side of Agatha Hakness no one had seen. No one besides Y/N and Rio. Yet, as the hole on your body closed, no one exactly knew what would be of you. Rio stood there, overing your body.

“She will be alright.” Teen reassured Agatha almost three hours later, giving her some of the berries he found on the road.

She wanted to curse him for putting you into that situation, but then again, the Salem Seven were her fault. A moment passed as your body was kept close to the fire. On the sidelines, Death eyed you, protected by Agatha’s love, something that she despised you for. The blue eyed witch gazed at you.

“You care for her.” Lilia said, voice flowing with the wind. “Like you never cared for anyone.”

“Just one person, besides her. My son.” she smiled sadly. It was the first time mentioning him, but the truth was just as painful as the current reality. The coven, her found coven, listened to it. “And Y/N helped me navigate all of that. Back from Salem to now. But this is not the first time i almost killed her.”

“If you are going to talk about our story...” a faint, tired, almost really dead voice startled them. Rio had disappeared again, but Y/N’s eyes flashed from her place on the floor. “At least wake me up.”

The others laughed tearfully, relieved, but as Agatha rushed to your side, still a mess of hair, tears and dried mud, they gathered the fire away from them.

“Y/N...sunshine. I’m...”

“Don’t, love. Don’t even think of it.” the maimed witch intercepted, reaching out just one hand to touch her left cheek. Her thumb caressed her face. “I’m here. And I'm not going anywhere. It's not easy to free yourself from me.”

“And i don’t want to.”, her lips pressed against your forehead, kissing it before pecking your lips. “I’m sorry I keep drowning you into my mess. This is unaceptable.”

“Aggy. Please, stop.” even laying down, you could still command her with those sweet eyes. “It’s not your fault.’

“But...”

“No buts. Now, come here.”

As you gently pulled Agatha down, her arms were protective around you. Your body still ached, but as your heartbeat fell into the same rhythm of Agatha’s, there was no doubt you would survive. With your head on her chest, your heavy eyes fell onto the image of the coven exchanging a cup of water they found. Behind them, the shadow of Death blinked slowly at you, turning her back before cutting Billy’s reality to step out.

It wasn’t over, but the worst was.

"I love you." Her voice hummed against your hair.

And you would do all over again for her.

[willowgarlands]

Grief is the ghost of love...

"Most times, a ghost is a wish."

""I loved you completely, and you loved me the same," she said, "that's all." And this was the point I wanted the most to make. That at the end of our life, if we can say this about each other, the rest doesn't matter. It’s the love that stays."

“I'm in the hallway again, I'm in the hallway. The radio's playing my favorite song. Leave the lights on. Keep talking. I'll keep walking toward the sound of your voice."

"you can’t take loved away. time and death and mistakes take people from you, but nothing and no one can take back that love... everything changes irreversibly with every second that passes, but nothing and no one can change the fact that i was loved and i loved back... you can’t take it away from me. i was loved. i was loved."

"At the root of every ghost, a yearning. A tug, in which a living person reaches so fervently toward something absent, that the absence becomes bodied. As anyone who has known loss understands full well, lack is not in fact, an absence at all. It is a presence. A person we love dies, or leaves, or changes, and a gap forms. It takes on their shape. Mimics their movement. Echoes their voice like a mockingbird. We feel this gap take up space, filling every place our lost one once was, and now isn’t. It reflects in mirrors. Flickers in candle flames. A phantom."

The Amazing Devil, Inkpot Gods//Jamie Anderson//Haunting of Hill House//twitter user @tothedeaths//Lang Leav, Memories//@boymartyr//Mike Flanagan//Xie Lei, Blow//Valeria Luiselli, Faces in the Crowd (tr. Christina MacSweeney)//Haunting of Hill House//Richard Silken, You Are Jeff//Henri Nouwen//Spiritfarer//@boymiffy & @petrichara//Amanda Lovelace, to drink coffee with a ghost//Max LL, What You Leave Behind//@nickyandmikey//The Newton Brothers//@wifegideonnav//Shannon Barry//GennaRose Nethercott, “A Ghost Is a Memory.” On Bodies, Belief, and the Places Ghost Stories Live

[thefallenangelsgang]

I'm losing my fucking mind

Or: I just saw Lord of the Rings the Musical at the Chicago Shakespeare Theater and my brain chemistry has irreversibly changed

I'm too genuinely scrambled at the moment from travel to make a solid post (I am multiple states away from Illinois and I hate city driving) but I cannot shake the life-changing experience that was.

SPOILERS AHEAD

(Spoiler free tldr: story is changed sometimes severely to make a sub-3hr runtime or to simplify, but the message doesn't get completely lost. Tolkien fan approved)

First issue I can see everyone having is how much the story changes because it does change a lot. Rohan and Gondor being merged is probably the most glaring. I think it works because the show is more focused on the Hobbits (specifically Frodo and Sam). Personally I can look past it. My one issue is the missing Sam monologues (mount doom is a rather swift sequence, I'd have liked to see Sam give his devotion speech and his speech about the shire while waiting to die) those would have made insane songs but alas. The ending still was a gut punch though so it's more a personal preference thing.

First thing that blew me away was the technical aspect. The lighting and set design was GORGEOUS and EVOCATIVE. There were multiple times lighting alone drew me to tears.

The puppetry is immaculate. The nazgul chase is singularly some of the most beautiful choreo I've seen and I'm a slut for puppetry

The cast play all of the instruments live on stage, sometimes while doing choreography (nothing will prepare you to see Legolas holding a fucking trumpet or Boromir strapped into a goddamn accordion)

The costuming is more accurate to the original editions' illustrations which I found endlessly charming. One difference is, for safety (probably OSHA), all the hobbits (and Gollum) wear Sandals. This is never discussed. I love that.

BOROMIR IS KILLED BY HIS OWN SWORD WHICH I CANNOT EXPRESS HOW PERFECT THAT IS NARRATIVELY

GOLLUM PLAYED BY TONY BOZZUTO IS NEARLY INDISTINGUISHABLE FROM ANDY SERKIS

(I am not joking about this. Somehow he has mastered Andy's physicality and voice work. It truly was a sight to behold.)

Saruman/Elrond's actor (dressed as a hobbit) was hanging out in our section during preshow and was having a grand old time.

Bilbo and Frodo were in the main audience bothering people. Frodo was playing a stick and ring game and got absolutely shown up by some 10 year old he invited to play.

The Entmoot took literally 2 minutes (the way I had to stop from HOWLING at that)

I was SOBBING at the end, like actually.

Somehow this production managed to keenly make me feel the ending of Frodo leaving for the Grey Havens more than the movies did. The Irony of Frodo leaving being both a hopeful prayer that there is a place where people bound with trauma and wounds too deep to heal can live in peace without pain and also a grim acceptance that sometimes people cannot recover was STARK

Frodo and Sam really push the narrative of this show up until the end and it hits HARD. God bless this cast with steady work, they all deserve it.

[silvergarnet12]

Splatoon was the first Nintendo game to push me out of my comfort zone of single player games, and with the closure of it's servers I wanted to draw a tribute to a game that really means a lot to me.

Some long rambles about the game under the cut.

When I first played the Global Testfire I was 15, and the only mutliplayer games I played were with friends in the same room.

Splatoon was also the first shooter I ever picked up, as I always liked bright colours over more realistic graphics in my games, and back then the only shooters I knew about were Halo(and that was only really a name to me!) and the CoD games.

Any worries I had about being bad quickly vanished as the sheer vibe of chaotic fun the game had, particularly when no one had played it before, got rid of any worries, and all I remember is having fun. And choosing to play as the guy instead of the girl for the first time, solely becuase I wanted a ponytail like in real life(I would continue to use the guy through the series as a tradition, a contrast to what I saw most people online doing).

When the game came out I binged the single player, and vividly remember the first time I fought DJ Octavio, and the first time I heard Calamari Inkantation. If ever a game was to convince me that a song could irreversibly change your life, it was Splatoon. Because to teenage me, in that moment, with Calamari Inkantation playing in the background while I fought an octupus DJ, it did.

It gave me terminal brainworms for this series. And here I am, 8 yrs later. Older and more tired, been through some shit, had some good times, tried, succeeded and failed in things throughout the years.

I've always been grateful that they made the decision for the player character from 1 to return, everytime they've shown up it's felt a bit like seeing an old friend, especially since as the games time skips have always had them close to my age(which probably helped my attachement back in the first game). So hi Three, can't believe we both probably pay taxes now.

I have the original two Inkling Amiibos, in a collection that is slowly building, I'm still attached to Marie, and yes I was on her team for the Final Splatfest.

I cried when it was over, just like I did in 2's Final Fest(I was team chaos, two for two baby!) and will probably do so for 3's as well. Something about this series just makes me super attached to it's world and characters.

So booyah Splatoon, my final online game of yours was well and truly years ago, but I replayed story mode to share you with a friend recently, and I think I'll refight Octavio tonight in honour of the good times.

You encouraged me to try out games I wouldn't have otherwise(hello Overwatch and Deep Rock Galactic), and outlasted one of the other major games of my teenage years(...Overwatch 1 I miss you). So thank you for that.

I'll miss Squid Jump, Inkstrike, the og kit for the NZap 89(why does it's new one not vibe with me ;-;), the Squid Sister's broadcasts and the more saturated colours. At least I can always return to the Plaza in 3, and that Spyke isn't dead like I was concerned he was when 3 released, and see the Squid Sisters perform during Splatfests again.

I have so much more to say in my heart about you but no more ways to word it.

You've been a fantastic game, and will always be a treasured experience that I am grateful to have been a apart of from the very beginning.

Now bring back Moray Towers in 3 damn it! It's in 2 but I DON'T WANT TO LOSE MY FAVOURITE STAGE IF IT"S NOT IN 4.

[mcytshipsandmore]

gripearl anon (however me calling them doomed yaoi/refering to any pearl ship as yaoi already gives out my identity quite a bit but oh well.)

I think! In evo everyone was like very young adults. I think pearl and grian went to high school together and grian innocently invited pearl to join evo like some sign up program thingy that they didnt know at the time was gonna be bad and irreversible-

I think pearl had a dumb teenage crush on grian. I cant even tell if its onesided or not. But it doesnt matter cause after the dragon fight he was gone. They took him away. Pearls best friend. Who welcomed him to the server, who had been there for him in a lot of personal important moments of their teenage years just like he was for G. Who introduced Pearl to everyone and gave him stuff to start out. Sure, Pearl is capable, doesnt need the help, but its so nice someone is so thoughtful.

And now that someone is gone. Pearl falls into a depressive episode for weeks, even months, with many other evolutionists trying to cheer him up. Eventually he does! Sort of. A happy christmas with friends.... before- the finale.

Before the world starts falling appart all around them. I picture this- purple sky, meteorites, parts of the world glicthing out, falling appart, eternal void, like the day they lost him.

And then they reach "safety", or so martyn and jimmy claim. Theyre the only ones who can speak to those *things* that helped them move to the new town. Never again like the old one. Thats for sure.

And Pearl- is trapped. In a cocoon. The evolutionist moth evolved, into a wolf. The dark shy closed off moth didnt work for the watchers anymore, they turned him into a happy and excited fierce dog, a man's best friend. That took him the whole season and so he missed 3rd life but he was there for last life and after scattering for resources-

Before meeting Scott.

He meets Grian.

After all this time. He sees Grian again. His best friend. His first love- and Grian doesn't seem to recognize him.

Sure, theyre both changed, physically and in demeanor. Just like Pearl grew taller and hairier, fluff replaced with fur, shyness replaced with open excitement and tons of energy. Grian had changed a whole lot. Hair, height, body type, it was as if theyd switched- except his face was just- creepy. Uncanny. It was still Grian just also- a completely different person.

He pretended like he didnt knew him. But that was a lie. Pearl knew it was a lie cause the moment he pushed too far trying to make him remember "evo and the old times", Grian snapped. He asked Pearl to not talk about Evo ever again, for his own good? Forget it ever happened.

And thus it became an unspoken rule between evo lifers to pretend like that never happened- some did better than others. Martyn surely forgot about the old days when he ditched Pearl at the end of DL session 1. Pearl didnt tho, and brought it up slightly to him at the Broken Hearts Club.

Even confronted BigB after finding out about the "secret soulmates" thing.

I like to think of Pearl, specially DL Pearl, a bit like Hera, specially EPIC Hera at least on her main song I heard. Viewing loyalty as so important and cheating as so horrible- cause lets be real, she just went off to the nether with a friend, the first one to claim someone else as his soulmate was Scott, but thats a whole other can of worms.

So when Scar, his only friend thats still by Pearl's side, brings up how his soulmate, GRIAN, is cheating on him- with BIGB of all people?

"BigB. I expected better from you."

Nothing else needs to be said. Because to have expectations is to think you know somebody. And Pearl thought he knew all his fellow evolutionists... seems not.

Oh but back to the gripearl stuff- the amount of rage Pearl must've felt finding out Grian was doing something as horrible as that to Scar, the only person he can rely on (cough snowblings crumbs)

Pearl officially hates Grian's guts. And he regrets ever even liking him in the first place.

Oh but when limited life hits and Grian looses his boys. His bad boys.

On one of their last nights, and they know it will be, BigB, Grian and Pearl, all sit behind those small barricades on the skyline (i forget what its called), reminiscing. Fuck rules. They all know theres a season after yet every finale does feel like the end of the world. The end of a world they know so well. Everything caving in and all they have is one another.

Sigh anyways thats it for life series gripearl. Also i think gripearl sounds like gripers and thats funny to me

Ah and in hermitcraft theyre much much sillier and way less angsty lmao

(Post is meant to be taken as gripearl /rom. snowblings(scar&pearl) /fam or /p. And pearl + bigb/martyn /p)(aka im not implying any other ships)

grian: well I'm sure this evo thing won't be bad in any way

Pearl: totally!

*years later*

Grian, eldritch horror:

Pearl, bloodthirsty victor:

Grian: want to kiss

Pearl: sure.

[dandelionjack]

tattoos i’m planning to eventually get done on my body when i have enough money et cetera

“insist on your cup of stars”. for eleanor vance reasons, obviously. maybe a simpler design than the one above

snufkin smoking a pipe illustration

lilies of the valley. for the connie constance song and just because they’re beautiful

an ammonite fossil

medieval court jester

spiral of hares. for the mabel podcast

biohazard + radioactivity symbols

instead of a TARDIS design or something in sherman’s gallifreyan (overdone, unoriginal, obvious) i’m going to get the above line of sheet music — the original “the doctor’s theme” — done on my inner arm. that will probably be my first tattoo, actually. because the music is what sunk its claws into me irreversibly. changed my life when i first heard it, i am NOT being hyperbolic. magical murray gold

[rusquared]

i think i should leave something in my will to icyroses on youtube for introducing me to the song Protagonist by BeWhy and then irreversibly changing my life with their banger yjh animation to that song.

[piccolos-bigtoe]

i love how rancid your sniper design looks, literally 10/10 design

WHAHAHHA THANK YOU here’s a kinda weird kinda spooky doodle thing of (albeit blu) Sniper I had on hand, I am not lying when I say I have literally NEVER been so obsessed over a character before. Like actually. Ofc I have liked characters, but the moment I saw him something inside my brain snapped and changed irreversibly. Like I don’t even know what happened, I knew sort of about TF2 (I knew about half-life and gmod first tho cause YouTubers and prop hunt yk) but like not really. The first time I saw him (and pretty much all the other mercs) was from some sort of meme where all the characters kept popping up shirtless while a song was playing (I’ll put it at the bottom). He’s gross. And he was the first character I’ve seen kind of actively be gross (or maybe I’m just crazy and forgot every other gross character) and I was like “omg,,, he’s literally me,,,” but also I think he made me realize I have a “type” in a way as far as characters go. previous characters I drew quite a bit were also hermits and certified gross girls (my SDV farmer, a seperate OC I have, Brian from monster prom but he’s not like SUPER hermit ig).

Also here’s the video I mentioned I physically can’t watch it again because it hurts, it hurst so bad, so much everytime, my eyeballs literally fall out my skull in horror and I die a little bit because I don’t understand what’s going on. I know above I said it was “love at first sight” but I didn’t mean from this video so now I kind of lied I’m sorry it was at second sight because I didn’t even understand what or who I was looking at.

[asena-queenslayer]

my favorite fellow peeps who make themselves sick over the tragedy of the high cloud quintet and especially yingxing who became blade

I bring ya the Korean original musical Frankenstein (프랑켄슈타인) by Wang Yong-beom and Brandon Lee

It's loosely based on the Mary Shelley novel and actually goes almost balls to the wall off the rails unhinged plot-wise, but it does it so WELL and it's made me absolutely insane over the past three days or so and I didn't even like the novel so you know it's good

I'm not fluent in Korean (though I do understand a fair amount) but the songs slap so fucking hard (y'all music truly needs no translation for its emotions to be felt)

And for those songs that do have translations on YouTube,

GOD

WOW

basically, for the uninitiated to either piece of media,

disaster gay(s) decides resurrecting someone they loved from the dead is a good idea and ofc that goes horribly wrong for them and ruins their life and kills/destroys everyone they held dear and changes them irreversibly and they become everything they feared :)

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A few songs + English subtitles to get you started (23:16):

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Also it's actually being performed rn in Korea since this is the 10th anniversary of the musical

So a couple of the main actors were interviewed recently by an entertainment show and they got to each perform a song from the show (linked below) (no subtitles unfortunately, but there are other videos of these songs on YouTube by other people that DO have subtitles) (I just thought these were best visual + audio quality)

The Great History of the Creation of Life Begins by Shin Sung-rok (위대한 생명창조의 역사가 시작된다 by 신성록) (5:30)

Victor Frankenstein sings abt defying God and shit while creating his creature/monster from his dead (boy)friend

BANGER ass set & special effects

I am the monster by Park Eun-tae (난 괴물 by 박은태) (6:18)

About the monster's loneliness and longing to be loved but even his body is not his own and he's been rejected by his own creator :(

Also THE Park Eun-tae's vocals and acting (worth a watch for that alone)

TW for fake blood & stitches just in case

[pulsar-the-northstar]

Grief as concept in The Gazette's 'Dark Age' - Part 3

Part 1

Part 2

The last three songs from Dark Age represent the fifth stage of the Kübler-Ross and Wright model—acceptance, or as Wright puts it, “the upward turn". This is apparent in the pace and melody of the songs: they revisit previously introduced themes and keywords, but with altered emphasis and arrangement, sometimes changing their significance.

DEUX already starts with a very powerful opening line: 答えは絶望の淵で 不可逆 夢落ち願う, "the answer is irreversibly in the abyss of despair, I wish this were just a bad dream". Grief has entered the "consolidation" phase, and everything that seemed uncontrollable (death) slowly gives way to controlled remembrance. The intensity of physical and mental symptoms of grief decreases, yet an unforeseen circumstance or trigger can still draw the mourner back into emotions they thought they had already dealt with.

This is exactly what happens to the narrator of DEUX: although they would like to wake up from the dream of their life burdened with loss into a happy reality, the opposite happens: they dream of the deceased, then wake up from it (You're my enemy / 逆夢喰らい示す, "you're my enemy / as you tantalize with false dreams"). The lyrics here include the word 逆夢 (sakayume), translated as “reverse dream”, appears in our culture: it's a folk belief that dreaming of someone's death means they will live a long life.

Therefore, the person who appears living in the reversed dream is dead in reality and does not let the living person rest (寡黙と眠る夜が怖いのは誰の所為？, "whose fault is it that the silent night and sleep are frightening?"), the mourner endeavors to navigate through the altered circumstances (行き場断たれ迷い 自我境界破れて 心が壊れてしまった, "I've lost my way, the boundaries of my personality have been torn apart, my heart is broken"), and there is a faint, cautious desire for the shared past to continue in a transformed shared future (君と僕は 底無しの闇に朽ちる - "you and I rot in bottomless darkness", 後は踏み出すだけ/ もう迷わない – "there's nothing left, I have to take a step forward / I can't hesitate anymore").

The second to last song, the slow, the slow, nearly lullaby-esque OMINOUS, reintroduces the notion familiar from DEUX, the "reverse dream": the mourner seeks to drift back into slumber ("Sleep...Count me down...Again") to meet the person they lost (さぁ目���閉じて/ 向かおう – "and (as) I close my eyes / I turn towards you"). However, the deceased person in the dream is restless, struggling with nightmares (悪夢と舞う君を見る – "I see you dancing with nightmares"), and n this instance, it's the mourner attempting to soothe the deceased (忘れないで / 心は死なない / 忘れないで / そう 夢は逆夢, "don't forget / the heart is immortal / don't forget / dreams sometimes lie"), almost implying: don't worry about me, your nightmares about me are not real, I will be fine now, rest peacefully.

The conversation with the departed and their reassurance that life can evolve in a different manner isn't yet tangible reality; it's more of a self-encouragement. The pain and loneliness caused by grief are still part of the present, the constant change—the constant cycle of life and death (流転, ruten)—is conceivable to the mind but not to the heart. The last verse beautifully expresses the pain that, despite the realization, remains in the survivor's soul like a constant, dull presence: 形無き明日を奪う 踏み出す度 / 翳る空で何も見ない / 悲しみに自分を殺し叫ぶ声は / 何も救えない – "every time I take a step forward (to the constant change) it steals the formless tomorrow / I see nothing in the dark sky / I kill myself with loneliness and shout in sadness / but no one can save me".

The final song of Dark Age, also its magnum opus, UNDYING, begins with the same themes with which OMINOUS ended: loneliness, insomnia, and hopelessness ("Sleep, count me down, again / I won't arise from this", 残された唯一 禍いと廻る未来 – "the only thing left, spreading misfortune"). However, as much as it seems like grief has pushed the mourner back to square one, and everything starts anew, the use of the term "Undying" already show signs of a later stage of oscillation. The apparent setbacks or emotions re-emerging due to external influences, as painful as they may be, are just as natural. In the final moments of wakefulness, the mourner seeks the building blocks of their new identity ("不透明な事実指し 何を信じ 何願う – "pointing to uncertain facts, what can I believe, what can I hope for?"), when the dream weighs upon their eyes, and in the countdown, all essential conflicts of grief appear:

After confronting each of the thoughts that appear one after another or simultaneously in the grieving process, each reinforced by the other, in a continuous feedback loop, the mourner remembers the refrain of DOGMA ("I deny all of it"), then the refrain of OMINOUS, but in a new context: “Sleep, count me down 死と踊り” ("dancing with death") / “Count me down, again さぁ終われ” ("come on, let's finish this"), and poses the question: "Have I changed?" (俺は変われたか？)

Indeed, something has changed as the experience of loss has become part of the identity, and this consolidation is reflected in the final lines of the lyrics: 終わりを見ても / 許されぬ願いに夢を見た / この眼は今もまだ / 今もまだ, "even if I see the end / I dreamed of unforgivable hopes / and these eyes still see / even now." The unforgivable desires (wishes, prayers) peak in the two English lines of the song: "Life, don’t change my fate / God, entomb my hate", and despite how ominous these words may seem, they still inspire hope.

The concept of fate in regard of grief was introduced by INCUBUS. The desire for life not to overshadow our destiny —shaped by the life of the departed, their absence, and their continued existence within us —describes the state where the bond with the deceased is redefined. Their absence has become part of life, thus forming a kind of constant, eternal, unchangeable (undying?) presence.

Our second plea to God (with whom our relationship throughout Dark Age has been turbulent, as we've only clashed with him) is a prayer seeking the divine to lay to rest our "hate" (our anger), allowing us to bury all negative emotions aimed at others and ourselves, emotions that only tear down rather than construct. These lines express the yearning for rebuilding, hope, and ultimately, the acceptance of reality.

Final thoughts

It doesn't necessarily imply from the above that grief, as both an event in life and a personal encounter, has been fully dealt with, despite the melodies and lyrics of the subsequent albums, NINTH and MASS, signifying a more positive phase.

What I consider crucial to emphasize, not strictly tied to the examination of Dark Age, is directly linked to the positive phase of grief, known as the consolidation phase: while losses cannot be reversed, one can shape a self-image, a narrative that incorporates the loss into the mourner's identity.

There isn't a definitive "right" or "wrong" way to grieve – grief, as mentioned earlier, is a natural, almost instinctive reaction we have to loss. The mourner inherently understands their needs: whether it's solitude and seclusion, or perhaps companionship, community. Perhaps the only "incorrect" approach to grieving is when the oscillacion process is impeded: if the person who suffered the loss remains fixated solely on it’s negative effects (unable to let go of the deceased and the mourning state, becoming engulfed, unwilling to feel anything but sorrow), or exclusively focuses on restoration (organizing their life, forcefully moving forward, rejecting the memory of the deceased and their connection, merely striving to feel "fine" again).

The compositions of Dark Age can be aligned with both the phased, gradual grief theories and the dual-process model. As dark and distressing as they might seem, these songs actually demonstrate a healthy, evolving grief that eventually leads us out of the darkness.

I trust that those who listen to the melodies of Shikkoku discover solace within them and uncover the concealed, encrypted message: that before dawn, the darkest hour arrives, but from these bleak times (Dark Age), the hope we have lost returns (Blinding Hope, Last Song) and eventually guides us back to the light ("Come back to the light").

Disclaimer

I want to emphasize that I am not an expert in the field of grief, nor am I a therapist or a certified grief counselor (at least not yet). This analysis serves as an overview of how The Gazette's Dogma-era represents grief, and its purpose is to hopefully provide solace to readers by offering support and reassurance that whatever emotions they may be experiencing are entirely normal. It's important to note that the original essay was written in my native language, and while I've used machine translation and AI correction to translate it as close to the original as I can, my proficiency in English may not be perfect (far far away from perfect). If you're interested, I can provide a link to the original essay on my private blog.

Any suggestions, corrections, comments are welcome.

[curiouselleth]

Raistlin is Eru? Go on...

Hi @backgroundelf!

Thanks for asking, I'm thrilled to share it with someone new! A forewarning, however; this got a bit long, I had a lot of fun writing it all out lol 😂😅

So, Raistlin is Eru is a crack theory I've been rotating on and off for a little while.

I think I got the idea during a conversation about Eru and the Valar, specifically how Eru seemed to be so hands off after the Valar entered Arda, and how the only actions he seemed to take were preventing the Valar from doing things that would endanger the world, namely during the Ainulindalë, preventing too much discord in the music and going to war with Numenor.

And it just kinda popped into my head. Maybe it was the specific phrasing of discord in the music that reminded me of some of Lord of Nothing from the Last Trial:

(this is from the 2021 english dub on youtube)

"It's not too late yet, to play a new song, clear the discord and correct what went wrong!"

Then a few lines later:

"It's not too late yet, to fix the problem-- change the dissonant song that life has become, not too late! For a new world, one of harmony suppressing the old!"

And I just started thinking about it, and it kinda made sense? Still in a crack theory way but oh my gosh it made sense. It would explain Eru's lack of interference, he saw the damage that gods outside a world, not living in it could cause. I haven't finished the Dragonlance Legends trilogy yet, but from the Chronicles with Paladine living in the world not using his full powers and being part of it (a bit like Gandalf in hindsight), that seemed to work a lot better! So only those who were a part of it - the valar - had the power to more actively shape it.

But then, things that threaten the very world's existence like the discord in the music or the valar going to war with Numenor? He reacts. And in the case of Numenor - violently.

And as I was just reading a Dragonlance timeline, the similarities between Dragonlance and the Silmarillion are prominent. I won't go into detail, there's far too much and I've barely skimmed it.

He saw the catastrophic damage to Beleriand and it's peoples during the war of wrath. A continent rented and destroyed. He will not see his world hurt again. So when Numenor invades, he fears what the Valar would do when attacked, because the damage in Beleriand when they weren't attacked was so bad, what happens when they feel they need to defend themselves? So he drowns Numenor, he destroys the Numenorians in Valinor, he bends the world and removes Valinor, removes the valar, from it. They could have good intentions, the best intentions, but he will protect his world. He will not see his world destroyed again.

But it's not just that. The Numenorians wished to become immortal. Wished to challenge the valar, the gods to get it. How long until they wish for more than immortality, how long until they wish for the powers of the Valar, how long until they wish to become gods? Almost exactly. Like. Him.

So he utterly destroys them so none but the faithful escape, so none will survive to continue pursing this goal, just like him. Just like how he wished he would've been stopped. He saves his world. But it is irreversibly changed.

After a time, the Valar play less and less of a roll in the world, as the world grows away from him. He has too seen what happens when gods are worshipped for too long. More war, more death, more destruction. Maybe it wouldn't happen the same way in this new world. But he will not risk it.

Even though he planned an end of his world, he planned it to be renewed. Without hurt.

You can see him in the gift of men too. He has known long ages in the abyss. Completely alone, nothing, desolate, but the worst, knowing that it was never going to end. Never. Shackled to this eternity. So he gives them the gift to leave, that he wished for more times over than he could count.

But he puts eternity on the elves. I haven't fully thought this part out, perhaps after Arda is made anew, Arda unmarred, he has planned a end for himself. Not necessarily suicide, but an end. Stepping away, going where his spirit will. This life ending and becoming something new. And that is why he leaves eternity on the elves. So, as a race, they may step in to fill the gap he left. Not as gods, not that powerful. But all of them together sharing the power. It becoming their world. And perhaps after a somewhat similar cycle of being in that role for some time, they get to be in control of their fate. And they get to change it as Raistlin changed his fate of eternity as a god.

---

But how did this happen? How did Raistlin make a new world when it was too late? *insert entirety of Lord of Nothing here*

The flame imperishable. It's so mysterious in the Silmarillion. We know so little.

So how did it come to be?

Raistlin spent many ages in the abyss. Some more clear than the others, some with not a thread of sanity. It would come and go. But over time, he grows a little. As a person.

His realization of how deeply wrong his actions were tormented him endlessly. But it was what saved him. He dwelt on it, reflected and grew. He gained compassion and empathy. The grief for what he did, the pain he caused others in trying to avoid it himself gnawed at him. Consuming him. But he learned, and became better.

The multiverse is semi-canonical in Dragonlace. When the world had died, other gods saw. How sad, a few thought. How foolish, many more thought. Then they moved on.

Uncounted ages later, one looks back. And sees with a shock that Raistlin has changed so much. And decides to give him a second chance. If he hasn't changed enough he will just fail, nothing more coming from it. "One without a heart cannot create life," (paraphrasing Takhisis.)

The god gives Raistlin the barest of sparks. Raistlin doesn't notice for a long time, he had long ago retreated to one of the corners of the abyss. If such a thing exists in a endless void.

But, he finds it. He searches for the one who left it but nothing. He studies it, cautious. Is he imagining it? It wouldn't be the first time he was hallucinating. But no, it's real. There is no outside influence on it. It's just there. A chance.

For a long time, he does nothing. He is so afraid, what if he fails again, what if he actually hasn't grown? (I'd like to think he also gained at least a little self awareness over time lol)

Eventually, he decides. He goes for it. He nurtures the tiny spark, he nurtures it and cares for it and protects it and it grows, and grows, and grows. It grows into the Flame Imperishable.

And he finally is brave enough to do it, to create life. And he creates the Valar. The Maiar. They create the world. He fears that he is too flawed to do it alone.

Ainulindalë happens. The world is made, he is secretly delighted when the dwarves are made, but he will not change The Plan (TM) this early, too risky, they'll have to wait their turn. The elves and men come, the Two Trees come and go, the First age, the Second, time goes on and time. The stories we love happen and are written and forgotten as time ticks ever forward. As Raistlin's world lives.

He knows it will never be enough to make up for his mistakes. There is no atoning for killing his first world. But he does everything he can to make this one good, and life flourishes.

There's just so many parallels and Eru's actions can be explained and make sense in a way, Raistlin's choices, his history and experiences drive him to do differently, to act out to prevent others from making the same choices, and to make a different ending. He sees the parallels, the similarities too but makes sure that there will be a different ending.

---

I'll definitely write this eventually, but my silm cyoa fic Be He Foe or Friend is really getting away from me and getting bigger so it might be a while. I just know if I have more than one big writing project going at once I won't finish anything lol. I don't know, maybe I'll start figuring out a plot or something soon lol.

I really haven't read many of the Dragonlance books yet, I'm mostly just using knowledge from the musical, chronicles, and the first and second books of the legends trilogy, so I don't know if all of it is really accurate to the books. But it's still fun lol

Sorry this got SO long, I was curious so I stuck this whole thing in a doc (minus the tags lol) and its 1590 words 🤣

Thank you so so much for the ask, 💖💖💖 I really enjoyed talking about this and if you have questions or want to talk about it more I'd LOVE to lol.

[calilk]

I will admit that the new dark age Is the only song by Coyote kid that I've listened to bc it popped up on some playlist one day qkkdkskfks

BUT the song is good and if the band has your seal of approval could I get some song/album recommendations from them :D?

okay okay first off IM SO SORRY FOR LEABING THIS IN MY INBOX FOR A WEEK. i wrote 90% of it then went to sleep without saving it as draft (silly me) and then didn’t want to look at it for a hot second. and heavily procrastinated doing it. but hey i deep cleaned my house :3

Anyway so FIRST you need BACKGROUND KNOWLEDGE so you know what the hell i’m rambling about. They have 3 albums, each telling a different story, but connected. one is published under Coyote Kid, other two under Marah in the Mainsail. There are also 2 singles, both under Coyote Kid. under the cut because this became an absolute BEHEMOTH (1000+ words). :0

Short Version:

Similar to The New Dark Age: Holy Water

Western: Tough Kids, Prowler, Strange Days, Northern Born, Good Intentions, Trigger Finger

Personal Favourites: Black Mamba, Skeleton Man, Willow Tree, Good Intentions

You’d probably like the album The Skeleton Man most, as it’s set in a dystopian, western dustbowl. The heroes are trying to find a cure for a magical, body changing plague. You can read more here.

Then there’s Bone Crown (my favourite). It’s set before The Skeleton Man and in the same world, but it tells a story of animal civil war!! wowsers. Tyrant fox king, world destroying forest fires, you get the idea!! Read more here

Finally, Thaumatrope. I have the least knowledge about the story of this album (both due to lack of info online and my tendency to get distracted while listening to the album and tuning it out). I believe it’s set in the same world, and follows the story of a couple travelling through the mountains, of loss and conquering death.

Okay SONGS!!!!! first from The Coyote Kid. Tough Kids - Probably the most western of this album, beginning with lovely whistles adding a vEry western twang, and creates imagery of wind whistling in a barren landscape, both setting the scene and highlighting how ALONE these kids are. This in combination with the banjo like strumming of guitars paints the setting of the Dustbowl, desolate and westernnnnn ooo yeah. The layered vocals during the chorus creates the idea of a desperate group of kids with a pack like mentality, desperate to survive in this barren, left for dead world.

Prowler - I lOVe the deep, gritty guitar(? or bass) sections in this one, creates the idea of a growling, distorted and distended beast, no longer human but twisted by the plague into a monster. It both describes the Prowlers, and the fear they cause in others. Then after the chorus, sustained notes sound almost like a howl, showing how the humans in this world can easily be poisoned by the plague and slip into sickness, and even that humans and prowlers are not so different after all.

Strange Days - One of the more westerny ones, with callbacks to the first track in its lyrics. The creeping fear of knowing your friend is changing irreversibly for the worse, and you are incapable of stopping it. The pitch shifting plucking, grainy vocals and chains and scraping of metal as background noises during the bridge (????) makes everything feel wrong.

Other mentions: Destroyer of Worlds- Such a fun funky song: death incarnate going clothes shopping.

Run- Slowly building tension, desperately holding onto life, the carnal fear of being hunted. The vocals stay low and hushed, until the fear catches up and becomes realised in a yelling, almost far off, outpouring.

Skeleton Man- Less westerny but my personal favourite of this album(mostly due to lots of emotions related to it). Letting yourself rest after years of stress, returning home at last, acceptance even though it hurts. Looking back at how far you’ve come, nostalgia.

Bone Crown songs!!!! Black Mamba - I love this song sO MUCH, it’s got some of my favourite lyrics in it (Shape shifting shadow snakes oOOKAYYYYY!!!) and a lovely extended metaphor of the fire being a snake, almost as though it was cunning and intentional: an avatar sent by fate to punish the Bear for his actions. And punish the Bear the fire does!!!! the menacing bass and powerful trombone create the idea of an inescapable wall of fire and pain, eventually slowing down in its rampage, leaving the Bear alone with only the drums and guilt and the knowledge none but him and the owl escaped the fire. This is followed by a raw and desperate vocal performance, as the Bear is overwhelmed by the consequences of his actions, until the Bear falls silent as the drums are cut short. ( can you tell this is my favourite song shhsgsgdhgdgdh)

Fox Hole - full of lively trumpets and drums : a celebration of the Fox King and an embodiment of his subjects unwavering trust in him, until the regal trumpets are slowly replaced by the warning blasts of the trombone toward the end of the song - hinting at the idea that not all is right with the fox king and foreshadowing his descent into madness.

Other mentions : Bone Crown- I have a soft spot for this one as it introduced me to all of this!!! Scornfully looking apon the enemy you are about to cRUSH. Love the brass.

Fisticuffs- The pace of the guitar creates the idea of youthful energy and overconfidence. The Bear is rearing for a fight, full of righteous anger. It’s kinda the training arc of this album.

Everybody Knows - The deep brass in the opening feels like the distain, hatred and fear of others. Being shunned, full of anger and the knowledge of being completely alone.

Thaumatrope time!!!!! Northern Born- The most western in this album!! I love the vocal performance in the chorus: desperation and yearning for everything to be okay again. Very good song but i am slowly losing the ability to make comments. Just trust me with this one. If you want to listen to any out of this album, I think you’d like this one most!

Other mentions : Willow Tree- I have an animatic spinning in my head whenever i listen to this song. I love the build up in this song. Accepting your flaws (maybe a bit to readily (the flaws are mass murder))

Holy Water- I just love all the vibes in this song. The distortion of the vocals. Probably the most similar to The New Dark Age (spoken, slow building of dread and tension).

Ok FINAL ONE SINGLESSSS. In short they’re both fab and I think they’d both be right up your alley, as both very westerny. Neither have attached storylines.

Good Intentions- Verbal Gunfight. Or the taunting before a gunfight. Very westerny and one of the most upbeat sounding and danceable ones. The funky synths makes it feel almost like a futuristic western gunfight with crazy cool futuristic guns. Both are scornful and think of themselves as superior. It’s simultaneously fun and threatening.

Trigger Finger - Feels like a game of poker, with enemies on all sides. Backed into a corner, only able to use your wits to escape. Desperately planning an escape route, alone in a darkened room with your enemies literally betting against you. I could say more but my brain is kind of anlalysised out.

Hope you gained some insight while reading this, or if it was all just letters that’s chill. Sorry it turned out so long, and if you take none of my recommendations that’s chill as freak. thank you for giving me the opportunity to ramble about something i love!!!!! even if it was a week late. i had fun!!!! idk why i procrastinated this it was chill. yayyy!!!!!

[natalicius]

Arigato Sakurai-san for leading me to my own music journey.

It has been a long time since Atsushi Sakurai, my all time favourite artist, left this earthly plane. He has been my muse for 10 years. He still is and will be. I think I will never be able to fully grasp that he’s gone. My inability to listen to BUCK-TICK’s songs to this day is the only painful reminder that something has irreversibly changed. My life turned upside down drastically few weeks after the October 19th. Long story short, I had to move out and soon I met someone with whom we created a new music project. I started singing, writing lyrics and scripts, drawing storyboards, editing and directing music videos. Getting such chance to make use of my almost forgotten talents is definitely a blessing but also a curse at the same time. This wild ride is full of creative expansion and painful but transformational relationship experiences.

I don’t know what will happen. Will we be able to make our songs known to the public or will we be forgotten? But now I understand why Buck-Tick and especially Atsushi's way of expressing music through emotional singing, gestures and poetic lyrics became a part of my own artistic journey.

Hey Acchan, if you can hear me, I just want to say, thank you for preparing me for discovering my purpose and for being my endless source of inspiration. I'm deeply grateful for everything I learnt from you about creative expression.

[basaltbutch]

hi give me propaganda about your #1 favorite blaseball team (or top 3 if top 1 is hard). this is your invitation to go absolutely fucking ham <- he needs help deciding which team to give a big role in his selfship isekai fic (posting this ask publicly is totally fine btw :3)

HI THIS IS. NOT A HARD QUESTION AT ALL I AM A HELLMOUTH SUNBEAMS FAN FOR LIFE!!! the sun tattoo over my collarbone may or may not be in honor of them, even.

we are just some guys in what was previously moab, swallowed up by the hellmouth when the forbidden book was opened. anyone who enters the town is irreversibly changed and can no longer leave the hellmouth/can leave but will always feel a drive to return . which is why we have an anti-tourism board <3

we were one of the larger teams if i remember correctly, and the solarium discord server is still going strong!! we were also featured on quite a few of the garages songs— the tug, the asphodel, and adaptations (body horror warning for that one) are my personal favorites.