#the scions listed are just the ones they’re closest to

[remma-demma]

Here they ARE!!! More info

My wolraha kids :3

[potassium-pilot]

Prompt 11: Preaching to the Choir

Lyse pored over her papers, her least favorite activity as one of two leaders of Ala Mhigo. On a weekly basis, members of the resistance would mingle with the public and guage opinion on performance, particularly what they believe is needed from their government. There would often be a demand for more food, resources for rehoming citizens, and from a more extreme sect, removing non-Ala Mhigan enforcement from their walls. Already, public opinions were dividing, all of them holding different visions of the country they had lost a quarter of a century ago.

When it was in a fight against a common foe, they were united. Now that the foe is gone, what stood to bind them together?

This frustrated the young leader to no end. Before she could torture herself over the politics of Ala Mhigo for any longer, a voice greeted her at her office door.

“Forgive me for intruding, Mistress Hext.”

Aymeric stood in the doorway to greet her. “Lord Commander, I keep telling you this, you can just call me Lyse. ‘Mistress Hext’ makes me feel so old.”

“Ah, forgive me, M— Lyse.”

“Well, what brings you by, Lord Commander? Do you have a complaint to register?”

“No. Believe it or not, I have good tidings.”

Lyse’s eyebrows lifted in intrigue. “Wow, that’s pretty rare! All right, well, what tidings are they?”

He entered the office and retrieved something from his inventory. “I bear a gift from Dia for you. She would have brought it herself, but ‘twould appear some other business has rendered that quite difficult to do.” He held a small, wrapped present in his hand and placed it on her desk.

“Ha”, Lyse started, “You know, not too long ago, Y’shtola, Alisaie, and I were talking about how Dia manages to find time to do anything she does. I’m especially curious after everything they tried to explain to me after their souls were torn from them, mostly because it was hard to understand a word of it, but she was busy, clearly. I have no idea how she would be able to find a gift for me like this. Must be some Warrior of Light secret.”

“Indeed. She attempted to explain her toils in the First to me as well. I’ve seen firsthand what she does to find time, and…well, we’ve argued the point more than once, I’m afraid. Little can stand between her and what she wants, and exhaustion clearly doesn’t affect her much.” Lyse smiled at the thought, then replied, “Would that I had her time management skills. Trying to find any free time right now feels next to impossible.”

“That seems to be a universal truth among leaders of men.”

“Ha, isn’t it? And don’t even get me started on just how much paperwork I’m trying to make a dent in.” Aymeric nodded while she stood up from her chair. “And I can’t even go outside without someone asking me something, or pulling me somewhere, or yelling at me for something I can’t control.” He knew a rant when he saw one. He sat down and sat by to let it happen; not a word was needed from him while she paced back and forth.

“And everyone has something wrong! Be it a housing issue, a food problem, or a medicine problem- chirurgeons are so expensive, Lord Commander. I’m glad the Alliance is helping us, but there’s only so much they can do, and there’s so many mouths to feed and homes to provide and—“ Lyse interrupted her rant by slamming her right hand down on her desk, making Aymeric flinch as the pugilist was more than capable of breaking it in half.

“I want to make my people happy, and I can’t make them happy.”

Aymeric waited a moment, unsure if she was going to continue. When it was clear that she was only capable of bowing her head and keeping her eyes shut, he found his words.

“Rarely do I hear one’s sentiments perfectly echo mine own.”

Lyse reopened her eyes and looked to him.

“As do I, Lyse.”

Hien appeared this time, wearing his trademark smile, and entered the office casually. “You know, if you want for resources, I invite you to contact the Shazenkai in Doma. They’ve been wonderful in their efforts to rebuild the Doman Enclave.”

Lyse smiled back. “What is the Shazenkai? I feel like I should know about this by now if they’ve been so helpful.” Hien shrugged his shoulders and sat in the chair next to Aymeric. “It hasn’t come up in discussion, luckily for you. Simply put, they find people to donate items they don’t need to sell to others at a higher price so they may fund workers. They also use the funding they gain to negotiate with vendors and other important people to trade resources that aid Doma. You may want to consider such a tactic.”

Lyse pondered the suggestion. “That’s all fine and good, but where do I find people willing to donate?”

“Ask Dia. She’s our biggest donor.” Aymeric shot him a quizzical look and asked incredulously, “Really?” Hien returned his own quizzical look and responded, “Yes, Lord Commander. I receive weekly reports from the Shazenkai and every time, she sits at the top of the list of contributors. Without her, we would have no school, market, rice field, paper mill, blacksmith tools…”

Aymeric’s eyebrows lifted and he brought his gaze to the floor in front of him. “Incredible. Here I thought she had only aided Ishgard in such a manner. I’ll have to ask her about this when I get home.” He looked to Lyse himself and said, “I would also encourage you to come into contact with Lord Francel Haillenarte. His knowledge of his own negotiations with vendors and others who have aided in the rebuilding of the Firmament may come of use to you.”

“How did the rebuilding work?” she asked.

“Essentially, after tireless arguments about it, we in the House of Lords and Commons passed a motion to rebuild the Firmament, a living quarter of Ishgard that was unfortunately burned down by heretics after Dia and Estinien defeated Nidhogg. Lord Francel, Dia, and Count de Durendaire managed to secure quite a few resources to aid the endeavour, and helped rehome no small number of former Firmament citizens. During this time, countless adventurers had been recruited to help scavenge resources and create equipment for all to use to aid in rebuilding the Firmament.”

Lyse took a seat back down behind her desk. “These are good suggestions. Would you mind giving the names of these people again later?”

“Of course”, replied Aymeric, with Hien giving a nod. Lyse brought her eyes to Hien and inquired, “Well, what brings you here, Hien?”

“I was wondering if we were still going to the Bismarck for lunch today before the meeting.” Lyse gasped. “I am so sorry, Hien! Yes, we are, I just got so caught up in all of this and— ugh, this is frustrating!”

“Don’t worry yourself so. It’s hard to keep these obligations together, particularly in our positions.” Lyse sighed and complained,“I don’t want my obligations to my friends to be tossed to the side. They’re important to me.”

“Unfortunately, that tends to be the first thing that must go. At the very least, you’re in a great position that those you are socially obligated to are quite understanding”, replied Aymeric. Lyse frowned. “Lord Commander, how do you deal with that? It can’t be easy.”

“I’m afraid my own social obligations tend to be rather limited now that one of my closest friends has left Ishgard to join the Scions, so it tends to be just the occasional drink with Lucia, and whatever time I may spend with Dia when I return home.”

Hien joined in with, “Laying in hiding for five years has limited my own now that I’m no longer bound to the Azim Steppe. It helps little that I tend to leave Doma quite a bit more than I expected to when I took the throne.” Hien smiled at Lyse and said, “I suppose that’s why I enjoy what time I get with you so much.” Lyse smiled back.

“Look at us, talking as though we’ve been at this for years. Well, except maybe for you, Lord Commander. How long have you lead the Temple Knights?” Lyse inquired.

“I started serving as the Lord Commander after the previous perished in the blizzards following the Calamity. That in mind, ‘twas only a few years ago that the new Ishgardian government formed, and I was elected it’s Lord Speaker, the highest level of the House of Lords.”

“Mm, so you’ve been a military leader for a while, but then you were thrown into politics on top of that. I’m glad I have General Aldynn to help with the military; trying to lead both nearly led to the collapse of both here. I don’t know how you do it, Lord Commander”, Lyse turned her focus to Hien, “Nor you, Hien.”

“I have the aid of the Lupin for the military. Politically…I knew what I was destined to do. I’m ready to defend Doma with my life, and I was born ready to lead her.” Lyse looked to the ground.

“I didn’t have that kind of resource.” Lyse let out a sharp breath from her nose. “I was a refugee, and a young one at that. I was five when we left; all I ever knew of Ala Mhigo were stories my sister would tell. No one ever told me that I would take on leadership of it’s resistance, nor of the country for that matter.”

“Those who would seek power search for it all their life while those who avoid it tend to have it foisted upon them”, Aymeric remarked, “I know all too well the suddenness of such a position.”

“Take heart, Lyse. It may not always seem like it, but those who want to help you are nearby”, added Hien. Lyse nodded and smiled gently. “I wish none of us had to be here, that better decisions could have been made before us.”

“One can’t help but feel thankful that the Ascians who caused these problems are no more”, Aymeric reminded the group.

“Agreed”, said Lyse, “and from what I could make of it, with them goes any future calamities, or at least real ones. I think the Scions might have just saved the world, Lord Commander.”

Dia saved the world would be a more accurate statement, thought Aymeric, leaving the sentiment unsaid as ultimately, Lyse was correct. He simply nodded and said, “And I have every hope they’ll do it again.”

“I believe in them, too. In the meantime, I’m just thankful that aside from that creepy Fandaniel, none of the others are trying anything close to what the more leader-y Ascians had done for centuries. They created the Garlean Empire, for gods’ sakes. They’re the reason we left Ala Mhigo.”

“They’re the reason we left Doma”, stated Hien.

“They’re the reason I had to send Dia to kill my own father.” The two looked at Aymeric with wide eyes.

“Er, the details are rather foggy, Lord Commander”, Lyse stated confusedly. “Why would she need to kill him?”

“I bade her to stop my father from summoning the primal Thordan. I had no idea that he would use his own body as a vessel for him.”

“Oh, right…she’s a primal slayer. If your father became a primal…right, that makes sense.”

“You know, for whatever terrible things we experienced at the hands of the Ascians, we all have had Dia there to aid us in more than one way”, Hien pointed out. The other two smiled at him, and Lyse replied, “You’re right. Ala Mhigo would still be in the hands of the Garleans and quite possibly enthralled to Shinryu.”

“Doma as well, and the Shazenkai has much to thank her for in regards to her donations, and I personally do for saving us in our confrontation with Elidibus in Ghymlit”, said Hien.

“If I had a list of all the things I have to thank Dia for, ‘twould be years before I finished” Aymeric exaggerated.

“The Scions would have made little headway on the primal issues without her help. I’m glad we found her when we did. We— I mean, they, have a lot to thank her for as well”, remarked Lyse.

“…especially after she nearly died trying to save that other world”, Aymeric added grimly, folding his arms. The other two nodded.

“If I may be so blunt, Lord Commander, what you have is a mixed blessing”, Hien commented, “None among us can say we have someone to come home to at the end of our day.” Aymeric breathed a laugh through his nose, and replied, “That depends on whether or not Dia’s home by the time I get there. In recent times, I’ve been blessed to see her more, but I can’t say I’m looking forward to the next assignment she receives from the Scions.”

“Still”, Lyse said, “The rest of us have little opportunity to find someone like that. It’s lonely at the top.”

“Halone knows that had I not met Dia before, I would be in such a position with you”, Aymeric replied gratefully. Lyse gave an almost pitiful smile before her eyes widened and she gave a small gasp. “Oh, gods, we’ve been sitting in here for way too long! Sorry to keep you, Lord Commander.”

“Think nothing of it”, Aymeric responded graciously as he rose from his chair, “You may want to open her present sooner rather than later in the case Dia should deign to appear in the meeting.”

Lyse gave a light chuckle. “You make a good point, Lord Commander.” He nodded and exited the office, leaving Hien and Lyse behind.

“Well then, shall we get going?” Hien asked expectantly. Lyse put away her papers in her drawers, and took hold of Dia’s present before placing it in her inventory. “Let’s.”

Lyse clasped her right hand into Hien’s left, and together, they walked out of the office, and into the streets, ready to leave behind their troubles, even if only for a moment.

[tigerkirby215]

5e Illaoi, the Kraken Priestess build (League of Legends)

(Artwork by Riot Games)

I’ll take “Champions Everyone Hates” for $300, Larry!

Jokes aside Illaoi was a beyond obvious build with all the Unearthed Arcana subclasses being shown off. With Tasha’s Cauldron on the horizon and recent news that Illaoi is actually getting another skin it only makes sense to make a build for her.

But this is also an opportunity to make something interesting. In particular I see a lot of people online saying that the only viable melee Warlock is Hexblade, and while the Hexblade subclass certainly makes creating a melee Warlock easier it isn’t the only path you can choose. So to prove that you can play other Warlocks with a big ball to slam people with here’s a more melee focused Warlock build!

GOALS

Sheeyutu Nagakabouros - So Illaoi needs tentacles. What? Lurker in the Deep Warlock? I have no idea what you’re talking about.

Broken bones teach better lessons - Illaoi is a buff lady and I want her to crush my head between her thighs... What? Uhhh STRENGTH BUILD TIME!

Many gods ask for worship; they are weak gods - Probably the only hard part about this build is going to be ripping people’s souls out of their body... Good thing I’m honestly probably not going to do that and simply reflavor some stuff.

RACE

League of Legends has its gods and monsters, but the majority of the characters are human. Variant Humans get to start with a little bit more than the average human, but let’s get the normal things out of the way first: increase your Strength and Charisma by 1 to break bones more easily and to find more people who want you to break their bones. You also get a proficiency in a skill of your choice such as Athletics to lug a giant Kraken god head statue around all day, and a language of your choice like Deep Speech to speak to your god through your statue.

But most importantly you get a free Feat, and unfortunately this is a case of me being forced to stick feats into this build for the sake of aesthetic. Illaoi doesn’t wear armor in-game but I could make the argument that her massive arm pauldrons and general outfit could be seen as Medium armor. So even though you could get Heavy Armor “proficiency” thanks to the Eldritch Armor Invocation from the Class Feature Variants UA I’m instead going to suggest taking the Moderately Armored Feat for Medium Armor proficiency and +1 to your Strength score. Feel free to take something like Great Weapon Master instead if you’re okay with actually wearing Heavy Armor at the cost of an invocation.

ABILITY SCORES

15; STRENGTH - Eat your heart out The Last of Us 2 haters. (BTW screw everyone who’s been harassing Laura Bailey on Twitter. I know this is old news but still.)

14; DEXTERITY - Something something Medium Armor, even if Heavy Armor is an option.

13; CHARISMA - Ultimately this is a requirement for the class we’ll have to be playing, but I’m sure there’s a reason this tentacle-lover keeps showing up to ruin my soloqueue games.

12; CONSTITUTION - Illaoi is a tank in-game and while I’d love this to be higher unfortunately we need other things more.

10; WISDOM - Illaoi has knowledge of the old gods which I’d personally consider to be more Wisdom based than Intelligence.

8; INTELLIGENCE - Signing yourself off to be the priestess of some deep sea Cthulhu monster isn’t something you do when you have a high GPA.

BACKGROUND

Fun fact: you can be a priest and not be a Cleric! The Acolyte background lets you grant your service to a god, even if that god isn’t commonly accepted. You gain some Religion proficiency as well as general Insight, as well as two languages of your choice like Abyssal and Primordial to speak to all the ancient beings of Bilgewater.

Your feature Shelter of the Faithful will be a... little odd for your DM to implement. There are few temples to Nagakabouros, but if you can find followers of the Bearded Lady they will provide shelter for you and your allies, and also support you (and you alone) as their Priestess. But regardless you will still be able to find your people in your hometown, and will be able to perform sermons for your god. Even if those sermons involve cracking skulls.

(Artwork by Riot Games)

THE BUILD

LEVEL 1 - WARLOCK 1

Did you enjoy seeing the word “Fighter” a lot in my Garen build? Well you’d better be ready to see a whole lot of “Warlock” in this one. As a Warlock you get two proficiencies from the Warlock skill list so learn about the History of Nagakabouros and also take Intimidation proficiency because I’m pretty fucking intimidated when an Illaoi comes into my lane if you know what I’m saying.

But unlike most classes Warlocks get to choose their subclass at level 1 and low-and-behold we’ll be going with the Lurker in the Deep Unearthed Arcana Patron which will soon be appearing in Tasha’s Cauldron of Everything. One may ask why I didn’t wait for that book to come out to which I reply “I need to make content.” Regardless you get Scion of the Deep at level 1 to communicate telepathically with (almost) any creature that has an innate swimming speed that’s within 120 feet of you. The creature can understand you regardless of your shared languages and can respond telepathically. Look all I’m saying is that you’ve gotta be able to talk with Nami somehow.

But of course what you’re really here for is Grasp of the Deep. As a bonus action you create a tentacle at a point you can see within 60 feet of you. The tentacle lasts for 1 minute or until you make another tentacle. When you create the tentacle, you can make a melee spell attack against a creature within 10 feet of it. On a hit, the target takes 1d8 cold or lightning damage (your choice when it takes the damage) and its speed is reduced by 10 feet until the start of your next turn. You can also move the tentacle up to 30 feet as a bonus action on your turn and repeat the attack with said bonus action. You can summon the tentacle a number of times equal to your Charisma modifier and regain all expended uses when you finish a long rest.

Yes I did just copy-paste the description of the ability because it’s a lot of words to say something very simple: make tentacle in 60 feet, slam people with bonus action, move it up to 30 feet per round.

But unlike in League you get more than just tentacles at level 1! You also have access to Pact Magic! You can learn two cantrips from the Warlock list: Lightning Lure lets you pull your opponent’s not-quite-soul closer towards you, and Eldritch Blast is an Eldritch Blast that lets you Eldritch Blast; I’m not going to pretend you don’t know what this cantrip is.

You also get two spells from the Warlock list and now it’s time to just take any spell that has the name “Hadar” in it. Arms of Hadar lets you strike everyone near you with tentacles; isn’t it fun to get your ultimate at level 1? For some sort-of Soul Stealing action I’m actually going to recommend Witch Bolt: after hitting an enemy with the spell you can keep hitting them from a distance and they can’t do anything about it! Truthfully though there are a lot of really great spells for this build at first level and I’m sad I can’t list them all, so if you don’t like my spell picks try out:

Hellish Rebuke (Thornmail)

Hex

Protection from Evil and Good

Thunderwave (Subclass-specific spell, otherwise known as “better Arms of Hadar that aren’t tentacles so they’re actually worse)

Yeah level 1 is always overloaded.

LEVEL 2 - WARLOCK 2

Second level Warlocks get access to Eldritch Invocations to improve their abilities, and you know what we still need? A proper ability to rip out people’s souls. Shame we won’t get that, but Grasp of Hadar will pull them closer and Lance of Lethargy will slow them for trying to escape their Test of Spirit. These invocations do stack (IE there’s no rule saying you can’t apply both at once) so you can theoretically pull someone 10 feet closer to you and make them 10 feet slower, resulting in 20 total feet of distance you’re gaining on them.

You can also learn another spell at this level and while there are plenty of good ones I’m going to suggest some Thornmail, or rather Armor of Agathys. The spell doesn’t require Concentration, gives you some bulk, and makes enemies think twice about hitting you. And it scales well too!

LEVEL 3 - WARLOCK 3

So how about we get something big to bonk our enemies with? Hello Pact of the Blade! In short you make a weapon in your hands to fight with, and I’d argue that a Maul is probably the closest to a big two-handed bludgeoning weapon.

I should mention that technically you need the Improved Pact Weapon invocation to be able to cast spells while you have a weapon in two hands, but you can get around this by using a component pouch instead of a focus. (And Illaoi seems the type to cast with squid organs.)

Oh and you can learn second level spells now! Spells like Earthbind to make sure your foes don’t take to the sky to escape the wrath of the ocean.

LEVEL 4 - WARLOCK 4

4th level Warlocks get an Ability Score Improvement so it’s time to invest in your main stat: Strength! What was that? Charisma? No no silly Warlocks use Strength obviously, so put +2 into that.

You also learn another spell at this level, and another cantrip! For your cantrip Mage Hand will let you summon a little tentacle for you to grab smaller things at a distance. As for leveled spells Ray of Enfeeblement will let you pack Exhaust for your foes, reducing their attack damage. It’s a bit of a dirty trick but Nagakabouros doesn’t fight fair.

(Artwork by ERDJIE on DeviantArt)

LEVEL 5 - WARLOCK 5

5th level Warlocks get another Invocation so guess what we’re taking? Yup: Eldritch Smite, pretty much a given whenever I make a Pact of the Blade build. This will let you slam your foes so hard that they fall over! I’m also going to suggest you replace Lance of Lethargy with Thirsting Blade, as by this point Grasp of Hadar is already pulling them close enough thanks to two Eldritch Blasts per turn.

You can also learn another spell at this level and remember when I said we’d take any spell with the name “Hadar” in the title? Hunger of Hadar lets you make an area pitch black and summon a bunch of tentacles in that area. Basically Hadar is this world’s Nagakabouros. "Bearded Lady, Nagakabouros, names don't matter! Action does."

LEVEL 6 - WARLOCK 6

At 6th level your tentacles finally have some lifesteal! And by lifesteal I mean defensive properties. Guardian Grasp lets you use your reaction to make a tentacle shield an ally from a hit, reduce the damage they would’ve taken from an attack by half. The tentacle can shield any ally within 10 feet of it, and it disappears after defending them. Note that this works for spells too, so if someone’s having their soul ripped out of them you can use your abilities to pull it right back in!

Additionally your servitude to the Bearded Lady grants you a Fathomless Soul for the ability to breathe underwater, a swimming speed, and resistance to Cold damage.

And finally you can learn another spell like the Unearthed Arcana spell Spirit Shroud. This spell will let you slow enemies that are near you and also do extra damage.

LEVEL 7 - WARLOCK 7

7th level Warlocks get another Invocation but there’s nothing that particularly interests me. May as well get Devil’s Sight in case you’re playing against a Nocturne.

You can also learn another spell at this level and hey look more tentacles!  Evard’s Black Tentacles is a subclass-specific spell that makes tentacles that can hold people down!

LEVEL 8 - WARLOCK 8

8th level Warlocks get another Ability Score Improvement: increase your Strength by 1 and your Constitution by 1, as those are your two main stats as a Warlock. Definitely.

You can also add another spell to your list, and while there are plenty of great choices I’d opt to rid yourself of the unworthy with Banishment.

(Artwork by Diazex on DeviantArt)

LEVEL 9 - WARLOCK 9

9th level Warlocks get access to another Eldritch Invocation, but again none of these are that particularly interesting so I suppose you could grab Otherworldly Leap for the Jump spell at will?

But you get access to another spell and if you need guidance from Nagakabouros then Commune with Nature will let you gather information to aid you to spread your faith.

Now (or ideally sometime before) would also probably be a good time to replace a lot of your old spells, so depending on your DM here’s some spells you should probably swap out, and what they should be swapped to:

Arms of Hadar (RIP tentacles) with Vampiric Touch (3rd level) for some lifesteal. (Enervation at the 5th level is also a decent alternative that works at range.)

Witch Bolt with Dimension Door (4th level) for a Teleport back to lane.

Earthbind with Synaptic Static (5th level) for a Leap of Faith against your foes. (By that I mean it’s my build and I like this spell.)

Ray of Enfeeblement with Cone of Cold (5th level) for another powerful AoE spell in a teamfight.

LEVEL 10 - WARLOCK 10

At 10th level Lurker in the Deep Warlocks can feed their god’s Devouring Maw. As an action you can create a 10 foot radius sphere centered on a point you can see within 60 feet. Each creature in that area must succeed on a Strength saving throw or be restrained. And then: teeth... this feels like Pyke’s thing. Regardless any creature that starts its turn in the area takes 3d6 cold / lightning damage (your choice.)

Restrained creature can try to get out on their action, and at the start of your turn if anyone is in the area you gain temporary hit points equal to your Warlock level. You can use this ability once per short or long rest, so essentially consider it like an extra spell that’s exclusive to you and your faith.

Speaking of extra spells you don’t get another spell known but your tentacles do more damage now: 2d8 to be exact. You also get another cantrip: Minor Illusion will let you summon more small ghost tentacles, except these ones don’t do anything except for fool the enemy into thinking they’ll have a fun laning phase.

LEVEL 11 - WARLOCK 11

11th level Warlocks get their 6th level Mystic Arcanum, which is a spell you can only use once per Long Rest. Basically it’s a regular spell slot, unlike your Warlock slots which come back on a short rest. Unfortunately there really aren’t a lot of Mystic Arcanum options, and the ones at level 6 aren’t spectacular. Circle of Death is probably the best even if the lore is a little iffy.

You can also add another Pact Magic spell to your list: many say that a Dream is a window into one’s soul, so messing with people’s dreams only makes sense for you to test their souls. Oh and you get a third spell slot for your Pact Magic! Yay!

LEVEL 12 - WARLOCK 12

12th level Warlocks get an Ability Score Improvement but I’m going to instead suggest the Resilient feat for Constitution, increasing your CON to a 14 and giving you proficiency in CON saves. Constitution is one of your main stats as a Warlock after all!

You also get another Eldritch Invocation and now it’s finally time for an invocation we will keep! Lifedrinker will let you add your Charisma modifier as damage to your weapon attacks. I know it’s such a weird thing for Warlocks to have since they rarely use Charisma, but it’s still useful!

(Artwork by sharrm on DeviantArt)

LEVEL 13 - WARLOCK 13

At level 13 you get your 7th level Mystic Arcanum. To test weak souls Power Word Pain will see how much they can take before they reach their limit. If a target is at 100 HP or less they are affected by crippling pain. Their speed can be no higher than 10 feet, they have disadvantage on attack rolls, ability checks, and saving throws (other than CON saves), and if the target tries to cast a spell, it must first succeed on a Constitution saving throw, or the casting fails and the spell is wasted.

A target suffering this pain can make a Constitution saving throw at the end of each of its turns. On a successful save, the pain ends. While this may seem weak this doesn’t require your concentration, and can set up for all your allies to break the nonbelievers.

You can also add another Pact Magic spell to your list like Elemental Bane. Here’s the trick: pick a damage type of your tentacles that your allies are also doing. This will make both them and your tentacles stronger!

LEVEL 14 - WARLOCK 14

14th level Lurker in the Deep Warlocks get their final ability, Unleash the Depths. As an action, you choose a point within 30 feet of you to summon a manifestation of Nagakabouros. You then have one of two options:

Transport. You and up to five willing creatures of your choice that you can see within 30 feet of the manifestation point are grasped by spectral tentacles and teleported to a point of your choice within 100 miles that you have visited within the past 24 hours.

Fury. You can direct a barrage of spectral tentacles to strike up to five creatures you can see within 30 feet of the manifestation point. Each target must make a Dexterity saving throw against your spell save DC. On a failed save, the creature takes 6d10 cold or lightning damage (your choice) and is knocked prone. On a successful save, it takes half as much damage and is not knocked prone. The tentacles then vanish.

You can only do this once per Long Rest, so you can essentially consider it another Mystic Arcanum of sorts.

LEVEL 15 - WARLOCK 15

15th level Warlocks get their 8th level Mystic Arcanum and to truly test one’s faith try Feeblemind. You choose a target to damage and force them to make an Intelligence save: if they fail their Intelligence and Charisma become 1 and they become unable to do most things that require thinking. (Detailed in the spell.) This spell lasts for thirty days unless healed by a specific spell, afterwards they can try to repeat the save.

But more importantly you get some more Invocations and sweet Bearded Lady we can finally get some good ones! Grab Witch Sight to know the truth behind one’s soul.

And you get one more Pact Magic spell like Sickening Radiance to exhaust the spirit... because it causes Exhaustion... the D&D status not the LoL Summoner Spell.

LEVEL 16 - WARLOCK 16

16th level means an Ability Score Improvement so it’s finally time to stop beating around the bush: get more Charisma so Lifedrinker is better. There really isn’t much other use for it.

(Artwork by Riot Games)

LEVEL 17 - WARLOCK 17

At 17th level you get your 9th level Mystic Arcanum; the strongest spell you can cast! When a soul is too weak to fight it must die: Power Word Kill will instantly kill a target with 100 health or less.

In addition you learn more Pact Magic: by this point your foes should truly Fear you (and the fact that I’m not allowed to take any spell that creates undead.) Yes most enemies by this point can resist fears, but on the bright side you finally have four spell slots for your other spells! (Or Smites.)

LEVEL 18 - WARLOCK 18

18th level Warlocks get their final Eldritch Invocation: Visions of Distant Realms will let you use the vision of the Bearded Lady to see across all of Runeterra... or at least as far as Arcane Eye lets you.

LEVEL 19 - WARLOCK 19

19th level Warlocks get our final Ability Score Improvement and yeah: Charisma for Lifedrinker... among other things.

And you get your final Pact Magic spell: take Hold Monster as the final option to keep an enemy down as you beat them into shape.

LEVEL 20 - WARLOCK 20

20th level Warlocks are Eldritch Masters. You can spend 1 minute praying to regain all your expended Pact Magic slots. Once you regain spell slots with this feature, you must finish a long rest before you can do so again.

...I mean yeah you could just spend an hour to Short Rest, but being able to get 4 more 5th level spell slots in just a minute could be useful! ...Maybe...

FINAL BUILD

PROS

They need wisdom; they don't need teeth - Even though you only have two attacks as a “casting” class you do plenty of damage thanks to Lifedrinker and your tentacles. (Assuming you’re using a Maul) you’re doing 4d6 + 10 bludgeoning, an extra 8 necrotic, and an extra 2d8 of Lightning or Cold damage with your Bonus Action. If you take the averages of those numbers you’re going to be doing about 44 damage per turn! Not to mention Eldritch Smites to truly break their spirits!

Blessed is motion - Your AC shouldn’t be terrible with Medium Armor, but the real strength is in Guardian Grasp. Being able to reduce the damage of an attack by half is universally useful. Above-average HP (thanks to a good CON mod) definitely helps too.

I am a teacher; Bilgewater will learn - Despite your weak mental stats you have a good amount of utility with proficiency in a number of skills and spells to gather information like Arcane Eye, Commune With Nature, and Dream. Not to mention Witch Sight which will see through any illusions or shapeshifting. This means you’re a fighter who can see through invisibility!

CONS

If I hate something, I destroy it - Illaoi is a big lady, and while her physical abilities may be strong her mental capabilities are a little lacking. Your Wisdom saves are fine enough thanks to Proficiency but your Intelligence and Dexterity saves are rather subpar, and as mentioned earlier your Ability Checks aren’t going to be great thanks to your low mental.

My god is not love; it is a kick in the pants - All the memeing I did in this build aside the focus on Strength over Charisma was probably not the brightest, especially considering that the hit chance of your tentacles is based on your Charisma. See if you can get Point Buy for this build instead to max out Strength and Charisma: Medium Armor was taken more for cosmetic than anything, and Heavy Armor would probably be a better choice. And of course feel free to take Charisma ASIs early if you think you need them.

Something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens - Truthfully while 9th level spells an extra invocations are nice this build would’ve probably benefited a lot more from some Fighter or Paladin levels to get a Fighting Style and subclass features. I built this build Warlock-exclusive partially for flavor and partially to show that melee Warlocks are possible outside of Hexblade, but 5 levels into Fighter or Paladin would get you Extra Attack (so you wouldn’t need Thirsting Blade) along with other class features. And starting as Fighter or Paladin would let you take armor proficiency too, so you wouldn’t need a feat for it! (You could grab something like Great Weapon Master instead!)

But here you have it: a level 20 Warlock build, a melee Warlock that isn’t Hexblade, a devout character with no Cleric levels, a Tasha’s build before Tasha’s comes out, and a powerful melee fighter with good use of their Bonus Action and plenty of utility through spellcasting. As long as you live life to its fullest and grab every combat by the reigns then Nagakabouros shall be pleased. Test the nonbelievers and strike at the heart of corruption! For it is her way... to get camped all game by the jungler... and still get double kills.

(Artwork by epimeral on DeviantArt)

[bestworstcase]

So scions are functionally immortal then? I remember you saying that ZT’s first scion(you know, from thousands of years ago) was still Out There Somewhere but sealed. You implied that they COULD be killed if they fought Zhan Tiri. So the power needed to off one is narrowed down to more than a powerful warlock, but less than or equal to a god. What would it take to kill one of them?

in the very broadest sense, they’re killed the same way regular humans are killed: destruction of the physical body that outstrips their body’s ability to repair itself. it’s just that that’s really hard to do, because their bodies are functionally very similar to zhan tiri’s, ie amalgams of amorphous eldritch goop, remnants of their human bodies, and whatever bits and bobs they’ve picked up over the years—so, like, stabbing for example won’t even faze them. it’s like trying to stab quicksand. 

zhan tiri would be able to kill one of her scions easily by effectively just. crushing them out of existence. this’d be purely a strength/size thing—like stepping on an ant. 

other folks going up against a scion would need a weapon with magical properties that cancel out zhan tiri’s magic—and the best candidates for that are cathay (whose magic is fundamentally antithetical to zhan tiri’s), turul, or huma. but all of these options present their own problems:

- zhan tiri’s magic is just as harmful to cathay as the reverse, plus cathay demands enormous sacrifices in exchange for her magic; so this is a very expensive option for a weapon that would give you one shot to get in a kill. miss, and you’ve got a broken weapon and one very pissed off scion.

- turul and huma like zhan tiri, and are the closest thing she has to relatives; you cannot get their willing help to destroy beings that are, from turul’s and huma’s perspective, extensions of zhan tiri herself, and bending their artifacts to this purpose is liable to catch their wrath in addition to zhan tiri’s. 

and then the other alternative is to try to recruit another spirit strong enough to just smite them for you, but this gets very involved and difficult in and of itself, because asking a god to manifest specifically to kill someone for you, when that someone is one of the most beloved disciples of the oldest god around, is a very big ask. zhan tiri has her enemies but none that despise her enough to stick their necks out like that for free.

which is why demanitus bottled them up instead of trying to kill them; he already had quite a bit of experience with containing zhan tiri’s magic, and they are much weaker than her, so this was a much simpler solution than trying to kill one. though i think Figure Out How To Kill The Scions is in fact on his to do list—it’s just a very thorny, difficult task with no good options, so he hasn’t cracked it yet.

(there is another way for them to die, and that’s if their human soul is severed from the physical body, but that is if anything harder to force. that’d be more a psychological thing / profound loss of the will to live.)

[092219archive]

i’ve been watching ffxiv cutscenes for the main story (pushing thru heavensward right now) and i’ve been thinking of stuff for my wol lately so i guess now’s a good time to introduce them a bit :-)

here’s a link to the og meme: Self Insert Development Meme

1. Does your insert have a name that’s different from yours? Does the name reflect their character in any way, or is it just because it sounds nice? How did you come up with it?

wol’s currently nameless... i can’t use with the usual “eren” as per the naming conventions of each ffxiv race (i will use wol!eren to indicate, well, My WoL). maybe if i wanted them to be a hyur i’d be able to, but i’ve been hopping back and forth between aura (raen) or viera (veena)...

edit (8/4): i keep forgetting to update this lmfao,, but my wol’s name is momo and they’re an aura (raen)!

2. Does your insert have a very strong relationship with a f/o, maybe more than one? Tell us a little about the dynamic they have! This can be a bond that’s romantic, familial, or platonic, anything - even an enemy would count as a strong relationship!

there’s only maybe one person who’s aware of the character(s) that i’m maybe. MAYBE. maybe. looking at (eros Do Not Interact). no names as i refuse to acknowledge/perceive them in any manner.

but, the relationship’s still in the works,, i’m thinking it’s a lot of it’s gonna have to focus on positions of power/hierarchies... maybe a bit of slowburn... for spice.

i feel like any rom relationship i could build might. be slow burn. oops!

3. Who in their canon are they closest to? Who would they drop everything to come help, if anyone? Who’s the person they’re least close to? Who would they most likely not get along with, if anyone?

in terms of story, i think wol!eren’s really close to alphinaud; i get familial vibes from him (and actual wol spends a very large chunk of time with him as well)... but personally, i’m thinking estinien. yea he’s a bit of an asshat but he’s cool (but ig that makes wol!eren a bit of an asshat too)

when it comes to who wol!eren’s not close with... honestly, anyone that abuses their position of power for selfish and harmful reasons at the expense of people go on the hit list. but even then, if the character’s one of the main characters/shown often then it’s like... i’d have to think about it a little more. happens a lot

4. Does your insert have a backstory? Tell us about it! How does their backstory, if any, define who they are? How does it reflect their relationships now? Their hopes and dreams?

hmm much like my other s/is, wol!eren delves on their past often despite their preaching of looking forward. a hypocrite they are!! (/s) a lot of my self ships also delve on like. “same hat” so... honestly they’re just kinda going with the flow and walking wherever they feel is an easy path. they’re a pretty passive person despite the role they’ve been given.

5. Does your insert have any magical talents or otherwise special abilities? Are they passive, like the ability to befriend animals, or dangerous power that the villains want? Or if they're evil - any powers the heroes want to stop?

as per the narrative, they were chosen by hydaelyn and have the echo. however, they’re also extremely perceptive. they can typically tell whether someone has good intentions or not. the issue is that it’s always a feeling and they usually don’t have anything to prove their claims. as a result, they rarely say anything about it. it's not really a “power” but it can certainly be helpful.

6. Do they fight? What’s their weapon of choice? Do they stay on the sidelines? What would it take for them to get off the sidelines? Revenge? Saving a loved one? What’s the motivation for them to fight, or to stay OUT of a fight?

i plan on wol!eren being a summoner! or maybe not exactly a summoner, but something to do with magic being used offensively. they hate getting their hands dirty so they’ll just blow you up instead.

they mainly fight because it’s their duty/obligation to fight, but had they not been in the position they were, they’d have sooner leave combat and live off the grid. nobody really knows this because they never voice it -- it also wouldn’t be good for a warrior of light to say “yea i hate my job and i don’t really care about some of you”, you know?

(7/18) edit: with the help of my ffxiv mutuals, i’ve decided to make wol!eren a black mage :) it’s definitely fitting for their character.

7. What kind of clothing style do they like? What would they never be caught dead wearing? What’s likely in their closet right now?

REALLY DARK CLOTHING. if they show any skin when they don’t have to, they’ll Perish. i intend for them to wear the void ark clothing for magic users but much like everything else, that’s subject to change. clothing that’s aesthetically pleasing and easy on the eyes is good.

8. How do they fit into their canon world? What’s their role to play, if any? Do they have a big destiny? Or do they more live as a side character that’s helpful for the protagonists/antagonists?

literally the protagonist but very much desires to be a side character. because they like playing a supporting role more than the main role, they live in “anonymity.” kinda. it’s just hard when the group you’re apart of and gods?? know literally just about everything you’ve been doing.

9. Their favorite foods? Colors? Activities? What do they enjoy in life? How do they express their joy for things they like?

they will. eat just about anything they’re given, even if the food’s not super great (like a raccoon.....). they don’t really have any particular favorites and if they do, it’s likely to be meat or basic, easy-to-make dishes.

just anything that’s dark/muted. color colors (blues, purples, etc.) are their favorite.

they very much enjoy doing absolutely nothing, especially now that they’re so busy with working. if they’re free from work even if it’s just for a few seconds, you will find them sleeping. Lazy

if they like something, they’d never say it out right. extremely private and closed off person, so unless you’re really close with them, you’d never know if they truly liked something.

10. Their least favorites? What don’t they enjoy in life? How do they deal with being presented with things they don’t like?

literally just anything that inconveniences them. they want things to run smoothly so they don’t have to deal with anything they don’t have to. when something arises that stops them from fulfilling their duties, they’re get irritated. they also just, not the biggest fan of people and socializing.

11. How easy is it to make your insert angry? Sad? How easy is it to twist their emotions into negative things? By contrast, how easy are they to cheer up? What can brighten a bad day?

they’re easily prone to negative emotions, but it’s not “major/serious” since they’re mostly out of touch with their emotions anyhow. if it gets really bad, they kinda “shut down.”

one way to get under their skin is confront them about personal matters, but you can cheer them up if you have a good sense of humor! alphinaud’s helped with that, albeit unintentionally more often than not.

12. Is your insert a loner, or do they prefer crowds? Do they warm up easily, or do they tend to take longer to befriend others? What kinda people do they get along with? Who are they likely to be uncomfortable with?

i think i did mention earlier that wol!eren really doesn’t like crowds. it takes them a very long time to genuinely consider someone as a friend. sometimes they might not even acknowledge someone even if said person tries their hardest to befriend them. and there’s not really a type of person who they’re really “uncomfortable” with (spoilers they’re always uncomfortable with everything asjfhsd), but i guess if i had to answer, it’s just anybody with potentially harmful intentions?

they have. Trust Issues™, if you will.

13. What are your insert’s goals? Their hopes and dreams for the past/future/present! Do they intend to achieve no matter what? Could anything stop them, big or small?

in the past, they wanted to live a comfortable life as a recluse where they can do things without the eyes of others watching... and they still do, but now they’re too accustomed by the presence of people to truly achieve that. after their duties as a wol (if they’re ever completed honestly), they’d probably pull a cloud final fantasy and start a delivery service or something like that LOL

14. Does your insert have any family relations? How do they get along? How do they disagree? Is it a biological family? Adopted? Or is it found family? How did this family come together, if it was one of the last two?

sssomething like that? so far i’m thinking they come from a family of arooound 5. 2 siblings + parents. they have a younger sibling who’s a miqo bard mercenary and an older elezen (?) astrologian currently working somewhere in ishgard. debating on who their parents are but all of them were kinda... “picked up” and put into a family.

the “parental figures” were desperate to have a family but they had little knowledge of how to care for children. needless to say, the environment was not one to flourish in.

miqo brd is kinda like robin hood where he steals from the upper class to give to the poor because he refuses to allow people who’re in need suffer due to a lack of resources. on the other hand, the ast is the elezen who wants nothing but peace. the downside is that he’s very aggressive with his ideals and follows people like the archbishop, thordan.

edit (7/18): wol!eren wasn’t tied to their family biologically, but due to their questionable actions and words, they cut ties with their family and started traveling alone. it was extremely difficult but because they didn’t stay in confines of their own home, they were able to meet the scions and the not.

alphinaud and alisaie are like their siblings. they share a surprisingly a deep, unspoken familial bond with the three because of all the adventures they went on together. wol!eren’s been caught acting like an older sibling to the two.

15. Does your insert have any enemies? What’s that dynamic like? Why are they enemies? Did they ever get along in the past? Is patching up differences out of the question for the future?

much like the actual in-game wol, i’d imagine that anybody that wants to stop the wol in their tracks are considered “enemies.” i haven’t gotten that far into ffxiv to really name characters though,, tba.....

16. Free question space! Ask whatever you want to know!

if ur into ffxiv and u’ve gotten this far down... thank u :) and talk to me abt ur wols or ur ffxiv faves in my inbox maybe?? ����

[tiefighters]

Star Wars: Doctor Aphra #1 - Alyssa Wong Interview

In Star Wars, there are heroes like Jedi and rebel princesses. There are villains like Sith and slimy crimelords.

And then there’s Doctor Aphra. She’s found herself on the side of freedom one moment and saving the Emperor’s life the next. The rogue archaeologist has a tendency to walk — and sometimes trip over — a moral line between right and wrong, all depending on how she benefits. And that’s how Alyssa Wong, writer of Marvel’s new Doctor Aphra ongoing series coming April 2020, likes it.

“I think Aphra is a delight. She’s out for herself, for fun and profit, and that drives her actions more than any internal moral compass,” Wong tells StarWars.com. “It makes her really fun to write! Aphra acts according to her whims and desires, which gives her an edge of unpredictability. But the second you think you’ve got her number, she chooses to do something that leaves her vulnerable — whether that’s an unexpected moment of nobility or bitter betrayal. No matter which side Aphra’s currently on, you can count on her to be deeply selfish. And that’s what I love the most about her.”

Last we saw her, Doctor Aphra was heading for the stars with what was left of her fan-favorite murder-droid friends. She outsmarted Darth Vader once again, doing something uncharacteristically generous and hacking into the Empire’s database to erase files pertaining to the Rebellion’s new base on Hoth. The usually-not-so-good doctor also arranged it so that those closest to her — her father, her ward, and her on again/off again girlfriend — were safe and together on the ice planet, where they could take care of each other. But this being Doctor Aphra, she can’t stay that quiet, or that good, for long. That’s where Wong’s new series, set after the events of Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back, begins.

“After a streak of bad luck, Doctor Chelli Aphra is back, hunting for a score big enough to change her fortunes for good,” the writer says. “So when she hears rumors of an incredibly valuable ancient artifact, she can practically hear the credits pouring into her lap. Crafted by an ancient group of artisans called The Architects of Vaale, the Rings of Vaale are the last relic of a long-forgotten secret society. They’re a priceless piece of history. They’ll make Aphra rich.” She assembles a team of unlikely treasure hunters — including an old flame or two — to help track down the artifacts. “There are only two problems,” Wong says. “First, legend has it that the Rings are cursed. Located on a planet covered in ash, it’s said that they hold an entire ancient city in their thrall. Few explorers have returned alive, and none of them sane. Second, there’s another party interested in the artifacts: Ronen Tagge, a spoiled scion of the powerful, illustrious Tagge family. He collects rare, beautiful objects for the sole purpose of destroying them. And now he has his eye on the Rings of Vaale.” This sets Aphra and her motley crew on a collision course with Ronen’s goons, and off on a race to recover the artifact first. The series is illustrated by Marika Cresta, colored by Rachelle Rosenberg, and sports covers by Valentina Remenar.

Remenar’s cover for issue #1, revealed above, offers a glimpse of the new faces in Aphra’s crew: clockwise from the lower right, that’s Doctor Eustacia Okka (beneath Wookiee bounty hunter Black Krrsantan), following a look at Ronen himself is Detta Yao, and finally, Just Lucky. “Doctor Eustacia Okka is a disgraced professor, and unfortunate events cast doubt on the veracity of her research,” explains Wong. “Curt, cold, and obsessed, she believes that finding the Rings of Vaale will vindicate her. Eustacia and Aphra were classmates, but their relationship has long since soured.” Sounds about right.

“Detta Yao is a graduate student studying archaeology at the Shadow University,” says Wong. “Cheerful, sweet, and bubbly, she hires Aphra to help her find the Rings of Vaale so she can write her thesis. Detta reminds Aphra of her younger self.” But Wong teases that there may be a dark side to this ray of sunshine. Still, she may be the only member of the crew who doesn’t have a past with Aphra, which is probably a good thing.

“Just Lucky is a handsome smuggler and assassin,” Wong says. “Laid-back and dangerous, he’s in it for the money, not the glory. Lucky and Aphra have worked together, as well as against each other, on different jobs before, but neither of them ever takes it personally.” Altogether, it sounds like a team that will have some severe and highly entertaining growing pains. But there is a very important question: are the murder droids along for the ride?

“I can’t give you all of my secrets!” Wong teases. “But rest assured, they’re out there. Somewhere close. Waiting.”

This relaunch comes on the heels of very successful runs by Kieron Gillen, who co-created the character, and Si Spurrier, who took the reins from Gillen on the first Doctor Aphra ongoing series. “I admire their work on Doctor Aphra a lot,” Wong says. “Kieron Gillen built the groundwork for the series, and his Aphra is sly, dangerous, and emotionally complex. And I dig the thrilling, unsettling, and heartbreaking direction that Si Spurrier took us, with an Aphra who has to face the messy consequences of her actions. They’ve left some pretty big shoes to fill. Luckily, the team I’ve been working with at Lucasfilm and Marvel has been a fantastic help, and I’m excited to share what we’ve come up with.” While Aphra has been a breakout star in Marvel’s Star Wars comics — even making the jump to action-figure form — a #1 represents a chance to expand her audience even further. For her part, Wong hopes that her take on the shady archaeologist has a wide appeal. “Aphra’s setting off on a new adventure with a new crew, so if you’re new to the series, this would be a great time to jump in,” Wong says. “Of course, there’s a lot for folks who are already fans, too. But it’s important to me that this arc is accessible to everyone, whether you’ve never picked up a Doctor Aphra comic book before or it’s a favorite on your pull list.”

From the sounds of it, there’s a good chance that Wong’s Doctor Aphra will become a favorite of many. And the writer is having a great time telling this new (mis)adventure. “Aphra is just so much fun,” she says. “She’s got a ton of personality and brings chaos to every situation she steps into. You want to follow her, because you never know what’s going to happen. Sometimes, she’s a hero. Sometimes, she’s a villain. She’s clever and hyper-competent, impulsive and arrogant, and her personal life is a flaming wreck. What’s not to love?”

Check out a gallery of artist Marika Cresta’s character studies below!

Star Wars: Doctor Aphra #1 arrives in April of 2020.

[shadowbringcr]

Talk about your favorite ships for Lycelle!

send me a topic to write a meta about my muse on

Putting this under a cut because it gets long and. I may or may not be shy. Also spoilers!

THANCRED. Everyone who has been to my Twitter at least once isn’t surprised by this.

As someone who started on Ul’dah Thancred was the first Scion she has ever met - and she has knowledge of his reputation, although it was something she didn’t pay mind to at the time. But it was during the Ifrit expedition where she started feeling something for him that was decidedly not platonic: even today she would still count her first experience with the primal as one of her weakest moments. It was Thancred that comforted her through those times despite his overwhelming guilt in failing her. Lahabrea possessing him was devastating for Lycelle, and saving Thancred have been her firstmost priority upon delving in the Praetorium.

They’ve been through a lot, going from casual friendship to something deeper. The world has made both of them bitter and cynical, but they have been able to support each other through it all. There is mutual admiration between them - while Thancred admires her strength and accomplishment, Lycelle admires his resilience and clever thinking. Sometimes they would playfully snark at each other, offer snide commentary to the comings and goings around them, or - Lycelle’s favorite - set off traps on purpose, much to Thancred’s annoyance.

The reason why their dynamic works is the fact that these two normally closed-off individuals are very much willing to be open with each other. They are each other’s confidant and comfort, especially in times where they feel weak - because they’re not afraid to be vulnerable when they are around. They trust each other to have each other’s back, no matter what the world throws at them. Lycelle also doesn’t mind voicing out her more negative thoughts with him around, such as her disgust for politics or weariness towards chores, because he’s someone who understands and someone who wouldn’t judge her for it.

Y’MHITRA. This one is unfortunately a bit lacking in material compared to the other people in this list by virtue of Not Being An MSQ Character, but Lycelle bonds really well with the Summoner instructor! In a way they are peas in a pod, researchers in the same field and posessing an intellect that rivals her sister. She was a great source of comfort at the times where the Scions were missing or whisked away.

Their first meeting was also the first steps of her current career - by Y’shtola’s recommendation was how they first met, as someone capable of learning the art of the Summoner as well as someone qualified of joining the Sons of Saint Coinach. Y’mhitra may be the closest friend Lycelle has outside of her duties as a Warrior of Light.

HAURCHEFANT. A love unrequited. I believe it’s a very common headcanon-verging-on-actual-canon that Haurchefant is someone who sounds very infatuated with the Warrior of Light. He admires them to no end. And while Lycelle sees him as a dear friend and in fact one of the few reasons why she decided to lend a hand to Ishgard in the end, she never held romantic feelings for him in the end.

The thing was she believed that the person he was in love with was one of the many who only see her as the persona she puts up in public - the heroic figure, strong and steady, an exemplary inspiration to all. But Heavensward happened to be one of her lowest points in her life, and she didn’t think she was worthy of that praise. It was innocent hero-worship, but hero-worship nonetheless, and she knew his opinion would drastically change once he realized that she was a mess barely keeping herself together.

Lycelle was very aware of his feelings, as unvoiced as they were, but she pretended not to see it because she didn’t want to break his heart. Unfortunately it is now too late to say anything, and she would never knew which side of herself Haurchefant truly loved.

EMET-SELCH. But it’s complicated, even when you don’t take her current Existential Crisis into consideration, and I’m not sure if I can accurately put these into words but I Will Try.

The thing is that Emet-Selch possesses a personality that she’s attracted to despite how much he is a pain to deal with. He’s someone she could match wits with, someone who was all too happy to reveal the truth to burning questions.  The initial plan was to take out of Urianger’s leaf and gather as much information as she could under the pretense of mutual benefit, but deep down she did want to be friends with Emet-Selch.

Of course, there are quuuuuuite a few problems that make such camaraderie hard to do. Such as, oh you know, the fact that he’s an Ascian bent to destroy the world she knew and sacrifice all of the inhabitants within it. And as much as she likes someone that’s just not something that she could abide to, and thus was their story condemned to be one between hero and villain.

And yet, if she could, she didn’t want to kill him. Remember that we once lived, he said - but how, exactly? Despite everything she felt like she didn’t learn enough still. How was she supposed to pen their legacy down in history with such bare records, when she had no memory of the past? It was not entirely out of kindness either, she didn’t feel like oblivion was an apt punishment for immortals who have caused so much conflict. Yet at the same time, it was because she wanted him to see what may come next - what she wanted for Emet-Selch was not an ending, but a new beginning.

She knows of his beliefs, of how he saw them as malformed and incomplete creatures incapable of being the new stewards of this world, and she wanted to challenge that belief - prove that he was wrong so hard that he feels it within every fibre of his being, accept the beauty of mankind…and then perhaps he might find peace.

I imagine their dynamic is something messy - sweet and gentle simply does not suit them, not even in defense of each other. They keep each other on edge. He has his expectations, and Lycelle being the stubborn ambitious person that she is she wants to fulfill those expectations and then some. And as strange as it is, the fact that they can be awful with each other (since they’re enemies) is an uplifting experience in Lycelle’s end.

Above all, his proposal for cooperation was something that intrigued her - for it was a collaboration unheard of, yet it was a path that promised so much potential. She truly believed it to be possible. She does want to keep him in her life.

[nuclearanomaly]

Character Survey • Ninira Nira

This has been on my to-do list for a while. Tagged by @alannah-corvaine​ & @to-the-voiceless​ Thank you! ♡

BASICS.

FULL NAME : Ninira Nira

NICKNAME : Nini (she permits select few people to call her this, however)

AGE :  ~29 (at the start of Shadowbringers)

BIRTHDAY : 24th Sun of the First Umbral Moon (When I made Ninira I had just started playing and it was close to my birthday and not knowing if you got any kind of “happy birthday!” notice in game I decided to make her birthday my birthday to see. Hilariously though I didn’t understand the calender and so her birthday isn’t actually on my birthday but on the 21st of February instead.)

ETHNIC GROUP : Lalafell, Dunesfolk

NATIONALITY : Eorzean

LANGUAGES : Eorzean Common, Thavnarian. Believes the latter is part of her ability to comprehend languages thanks to the Echo, however were she robbed of that ability she would find herself still able to understand and communicate in Thavnarian.

ORIENTATION : Demisexual 

RELATIONSHIP STATUS : 100% infatuated with a certain smelly dragoon Single (for now)

HOMETOWN / AREA : Thaviniar Considers Ul’Dah the closest thing she has to a hometown, though she only started living there post-calamity.

CURRENT HOME : Mor Dhona

PROFESSION : Warrior of Light / Adventurer / Scion of the Seventh Dawn. 

PHYSICAL.

HAIR : Unruly, short, lavender purple hair. After the events of Shadowbringers the ends have faded to a very light purple, almost white. 

EYES : Bright green. Pupils hidden by the glossy protective layer common in dunesfolk. They’re a bit smaller than what is common in most lalafell but they are her most prominent facial feature. 

FACE : Round faced, though narrower through the cheeks than some lalafell. Her nose is average in size and bit pointy by lalafell standards.

LIPS : Thin 

COMPLEXION : Pale and rosy cheeked.  

BLEMISHES : No noticeable blemishes.

SCARS : Plenty. The most prominent ones are. A scar above her right eye that she got fighting Nidhogg’s shade. A large scar across her midriff from her fight with Zenos in Rhalgar’s Reach. And a long scar up her right arm from her fight with Elibi-Zenos in Ghimlyt.

TATTOOS :  None. 

HEIGHT : 3 fulm

WEIGHT : 40 ponz

BUILD : Pear shaped. Despite her time as an adventurer and her good endurance she has very little muscle mass and isn’t very strong physically. Watch as the Warrior of Light, saviour of the realm, struggles to open a pickle jar.

FEATURES : A plethora of freckles across her face. She also has considerably freckled shoulders, with a more subtle smattering on her arms and legs.

ALLERGIES : None that she is aware of.

USUAL HAIR STYLE : Short and swept off to the right side. Tends to let it do what it wants and doesn’t bother trying to tame some of the wilder fly away pieces. She used to have longer hair pre-calamity but after waking up to find it tangled so tightly in debris she had to hack it off to free herself she keeps it short. The idea of having to experience anything similar again terrifies her. 

USUAL FACE LOOK : Neutral if not inquisitive. Can come across slightly judgmental. Has a tendency to side eye and cock her eyebrows while listening.

USUAL CLOTHING : Close fitting, comfortable layers and a jacket typically paired with shorts. Thigh-high leather boots. Has a thing for over sized, big brimmed hats. 

PSYCHOLOGY.

FEARS : Loss of loved ones, Failure, Toxiphobia.

ASPIRATIONS : To protect those she cares about. The pursuit of further knowledge, to expand her horizons and to further her abilities. To collect lots of books.

POSITIVE TRAITS : Selfless, Compassionate, Intelligent, Humorous, Brave.

NEGATIVE TRAITS : Reclusive, Competitive, Reckless, Self Deprecating, Paranoid. 

MBTI : INTJ - The Architect 

ZODIAC : Pisces

TEMPERAMENT : Sanguine

SOUL TYPE : Scholar

ANIMALS : Ferret

VICE HABITS : Over working. Eating poorly, will often choose sweets and desserts over other options. Poor sleep habits, can easily get wrapped up in work or research and lose track of the time, especially during the night.

FAITH : The presence of gods in the world is undeniable be they false or real. Regardless she is not overly devout to any of the Twelve and has never called upon a specific god for guidance. 

GHOSTS? : Yes, having encountered and fought off a fare few, they are undeniable.

AFTERLIFE? : Not really.

REINCARNATION? : Previously she was under the impression that all souls returned to the lifestream and were ultimately returned to the earth be it in one form or another. After the events of Shadowbringers she can’t help but wonder if there’s more to it than that.

ALIENS? : Having learned of Midgarsormr’s history and also having encountered Omega their existence is undeniable.

POLITICAL ALIGNMENT : Due to her position as Warrior of Light and her association with the Scions she pledges neutrality among Eorzea’s nations. (Though anyone with a brain knows who she would truly stand with if the need ever arose…)

EDUCATION LEVEL : Though she has no recollection of her childhood education she was formally educated in her youth. Post Calamity she is eventually initiated into the Arrzaneth Ossuray and studies within the Thaumaturge Guild housed there.

FAMILY.

FATHER & MOTHER : Unnamed. Though she has no recollection of them, her Father & Mother are Ul’Dahn natives that set out for Thaviniar as part of a business venture in the field of Alchemic supplies. They become quite successful and though they initially contemplated returning home, after word of the calamity in Eorzea they choose to stay and solidify the security of their business in Thaviniar. 

SIBLINGS : None. Her parents real baby is their business, had Ninira’s mother not been expecting prior to their decision to establish their business they may have never had children. 

EXTENDED  FAMILY : Having no recollection of her own family Ninira thinks of the inner circle of the Scions as her family. It was a slow process though, initially feeling it was not in her place to consider them such. By Shadowbringers she’s come to terms with the fact and (over the course of Shadowbringers) realises the feeling is mutual. She also considers the Fortemps’ family. Edmont being the first person that comes to mind when she thinks of a father figure. And despite initially resenting him, Midgardsormr also holds a unique and special place in her heart.

NAME MEANINGS : Lalafell name that follows female dunesfolk naming conventions…? (Nira is Leek in Japanese?)

HISTORICAL CONNECTION ? : None that she is aware of.

FAVORITES.

BOOK : Text books, magic tomes, anything she can read to learn more. Cheesy Romance Novels.

DEITY : None Specifically, though she would suppose she’s most loyal to Hydaelyn despite not feeling like she has a choice in the matter. Primals that she’s encountered and found intriguing: Bismark, Ramhu, Susano.

HOLIDAY : All Saints’ Wake! Treats galore!

MONTH : None Specifically, likes the months surrounding All Saints’ Wake for obvious reasons.

SEASON : Late summer, when the days are hot but the nights are cool and refreshing.

PLACE : Her room in the Rising Stones, Fortemps Manor. Ishgard. Churning Mists. Kugane.

WEATHER : Clear skies, snow flurries, rolling thunderheads but no rain.

SOUNDS : Crackling fire, waves crashing on shore, distant rumbles of thunder, ambient city noises drifting in through an open window.

SCENTS : Baked goods, vanilla, campfire smoke, new books.

TASTES : Most desserts, rolanberry, chocolate, sweet teas.

FEELS : Old soft book pages, the comforting weight of a thick blanket, the sensation of flying.

ANIMALS : Ninira isn’t really much of an animal person. If Moogles count, Moogles, she thinks they're fluffy and cute. Obnoxious, but cute.

NUMBER : None specifically. Perhaps 1, as part of her competitive nature she does secretly like being the best. 

COLORS : Purple, Black, Gold, Crimson

EXTRA.

TALENTS : With the exception of the gaping hole that is her past, she has a very good memory and as a result can be a source of lots of information and remember details well. Speed Reading. Good at math, and can do complex calculations in her head. 

BAD AT : Art of any kind, she can draw arcane diagrams but anything else is all stick figures. Baking, much to her dismay. Reaching things on high shelves. 

TURN ONS : Loyalty to one's cause and companions. Protecting and assisting those that can not do so themselves. A sense of humour. 

TURN OFFS : Manipulation. Babying. Seeing others in a lesser sense. Closemindedness and the disinterest in learning and expanding one's views. 

HOBBIES : Reading, researching, exploring, swimming.

TROPES : Trauma-Induced Amnesia, Squishy Wizard, Power-Strain Blackout, The Chosen One, Humble Hero (These are pretty generic, but I had them sitting around from an older stat quiz I did years ago. I’m too lazy to dig through TV tropes for more right now lol)

QUOTES : “For those we have lost. For those we can yet save.”

MUN QUESTIONS.

Q1 : If you could write your character your way in their own movie, what would it be called, what style would it be filmed in, and what would it be about?          

A1 : Going to be lazy and boring and say a fantasy epic would suit her best. I’d pay to watch a full movie of my girl just doing the MSQ alright.

Q2 : What would their soundtrack/score sound like?          

A2 : The likes of music found in Miyazaki films, or Made in Abyss’ OST come to mind. In fact I’ve always considered First Layer from Made in Abyss to be a playlist track for her. 

Q3 : Why did you start writing this character?          

A3 : The inevitable progression of I make a character, I think about said character, I want to create with said character. I never rolled into FFXIV intending to get as attached as I did, just eventually I just wanted to expand on what she would have been feeling during the MSQ

Q4 : What first attracted you to this character?          

A4 : Me making Nini in the cc: I want her to look annoyed because this game took 1000000 years to download and I’m tired of waiting. But really she just grew on me over time. My initial creation of her was overall just what I ended up liking and she just gradually developed from there. 

Q5 : Describe the biggest thing you dislike about your muse.

A5 : It’s not necessarily something I dislike about her but her being a lalafell made me very self conscious to share her in any way. I was aware of the overall distaste for lalafell characters and that they’re considered dumb babies and memes. I care less now, she’s my precious character and I will give her all the respect and care she deserves and if you don’t like her or consider her an actual child then bye.

Q6 : What do you have in common with your muse?          

A6 : A few things, my failed attempt at having her share my birthday aside. She falls into similar personality types as myself and I definitely ended up giving her a chunk of my sense of humour. 

Q7 : How does your muse feel about you?          

A7 : She would probably be exhausted by my tormenting, I promise Nini any bs I put you through is out of love. 

Q8 : What characters does your muse have interesting interactions with?        

A8 : Hard to say, I like to think she’d have some interesting relationships with the NPCs in game regardless of how well or accurately I portray them...

Q9 : What gives you inspiration to write your muse?        

A9 : Playing through the MSQ is the biggest one. Others include simple things like inspirational prompts/scenarios. And music is almost always inspirational to me in some way. 

Q10 : How long did this take you to complete?          

A10 : It’s been on my to-do list for a couple weeks now. I worked on it on and off the last few days.

[kintsugiscars-archive]

-;canon relationships

Since he’s had interactions with a lot of people during his time as an adventurer, Lex has established relationships with people all around Eorzea. Below are listed some of his major ones, not in any particular order. This is mostly just how he views them and not necessarily a be-all-end-all guide on his feelings!

Thancred was a former object of his affection. They used to get along famously but since Lex realized that Thancred just wasn’t super into him, things ended on a one-sided sour note. Nowadays Lex avoids him and is pretty curt.

Y’shtola is something of a mentor to Lex and he’s low-key terrified of her. She knows so much and is so mysterious - not to mention she reminds him of his sister. 

Minfilia is a friend of Lex’s and used to be the only person he could confide in with the Echo, but he finds that while she’s lovely sometimes she’s a bit much for him to handle. She’s so mature that it’s almost off-putting.

Tataru and Lex get along well since they’re both bubbly and sweet, and he will absolutely die for her without hesitation. He wishes she kept pursuing being an arcanist and regrets that he couldn’t mentor her better. 

Papalymo is fun to tease, but Lex really admires how he explains black magic. Lex was never good at it and his brother (who was) never bothered to teach him. He hopes that he can learn some black magic himself under Papalymo’s guidance. 

Yda and Lex are partners in crime, often teaming up together to tease Papalymo. Sometimes though he gets exhausted since she’s so gung-ho and energetic, but he will still try and one-up her when he can. 

Urianger is a mystery to Lex. The way he speaks is off-putting and Lex is unnerved by how he refuses to show his face. One of these days he’s going to see if he’s hot or not, but until then, Lex will just keep being startled by him. 

Cid was more or less reverse adopted by Lex. Lex sees him as a father figure and will seek him out when in distress or just needing some support. Whenever he would get in an argument with another Scion, or he felt like he wasn’t being listened to, he would find Cid and sulk nearby until Cid knocked him into shape. Cid is the closest thing Lex has to a family anymore, and won’t let anything happen to him.

Biggs and Wedge are Lex’s best friends and they always get into trouble together. The trio is pretty chaotic and while they’re all incredibly brilliant in their own rights, the ideas they come up with together defy logic and reasoning. It also doesn’t help that Lex will test out their inventions without Cid’s knowledge, often ending in various explosions, Lex mildly injured and insisting he’s fine, and the trio promising never to do it again. Only to do it again.  

Alphinaud was also a victim of Lex’s adoption and is Lex’s little brother (in his head at least). He never gets called by his proper name (usually just Alphi or some variation) and Lex will ruffle his hair whenever he can. Lex always has his back and will push him to greater heights, often tutoring him in the arcane arts while on the road together. 

Ysayle is an enemy turned friend in Lex’s eyes. He finds that they have similar thoughts on many things, and he enjoys listening to her speak about her life and her experiences. The way she sees things - particular the situation with the dragons - is insightful and he values her opinion when making decisions. He wishes he could do more for her and be there to support her better. 

Estinien however, is a not-friend turned if-only-he-was-an-enemy. They do not get along at all and Lex frequently butts heads with him. Their values are wildly different, and they way they approach problems couldn’t be more dissimilar. It doesn’t help that their personalities clash violently too, and if they didn’t need each other, it’s likely they would have already had several physical altercations that would not have ended well.

G’raha Tia is Lex’s second love. They’re both huge nerds together (history and mathematics overlap quite well) and since they’re both fairly laid back, Lex found himself pulled toward Cid’s companion. There’s no saying whether or not G’raha feels the same, but Lex is keeping his feelings close to his chest for risk of ruining the easygoing friendship they have. 

[ezrisdax-archive]

message received

for the femslash big bang and also here on ao3

Jack accidentally receives a text from Oriana that was meant for Jacob on how Miranda isn't taking breaks. While the two of them are in a sort of friendship truce Jack knows she really shouldn't care about this message. She does anyway.

~~

It started with a simple mistake.

 Oriana had clearly meant to message Jacob the question but instead hit ‘Jack’ so when she woke up that morning to see a message from Miranda’s little sister she was more than a little confused.

 Miranda isn’t taking breaks and I’m getting worried, do you have any suggestions?

 The message sat there innocently on the datapad she was holding followed by one a minute afterwards with Oriana apologizing profusely for messaging her instead of Jacob. Jack should have just let it go then but she it was like the thought was stuck with her.

 The (ex)Cerberus cheerleader wasn’t taking breaks to the point where she’d worried someone around her.

 Jack tried to remember if on the SR-2 if Miranda took any breaks then either but most of her memories with Miranda on that ship were of the two of them fighting. While now they had made a tentative peace with each other after Shepard’s party Jack would still be the last person Miranda – or her sister – would come to with a problem.

 But now she knew about it anyway, Jack thought with a frown that Prangley interpreted wrong during training and very nearly ran into a wall while throwing a biotic field. Jack let all thoughts of Miranda fall from her head as she turned her focus back on her students, yelling for Prangley to get back up while subtly making sure the kid hadn’t injured himself.

 On the other side of the room Rodriguez snickered so Jack turned her attention to her, ordering all of them to practice barriers and walking around to correct stances where she needed it.

 By the end of the day she’d almost completely forgotten about the message and was just looking forward to collapsing in her bunk after writing up her reports but caught it on the screen of the datapad again.

 Jack petted Eezo idly as she considered the message again and sighed. She was clearly getting soft because instead of just deleting it she typed back:

 Hey kid, try getting your sister laid. Could do wonders for her.

 It was hardly a minute later that she received another message, this time from a secure channel.

 Next time you send something like that I’m deleting it from Oriana’s inbox.

 That was clearly Miranda and Jack’s lips curved upwards in pure amusement, picturing Miranda making a face at the screen when she saw Jack’s message.

 And I’m fine.

 The other message came in seconds later and Jack shook her head, typing back.

 Bullshit.

 As predicted Miranda didn’t take kindly to being called out like that.

 This is hardly your concern. How are your students doing?

 Jack raised an eyebrow at the attempt to swerve the conversation in another direction.

 Not as high strung as you so they’re doing fine.

 This time there wasn’t a response back as quickly, Jack had to wait around about five minutes and the more time that went by the angrier she was starting to get. That the anger was coming from a place of worry didn’t even occur to her.

 I don’t think we should talk about this.

 Jack rolled her eyes and sneered at the words even if Miranda couldn’t see it.

 Too late for that. Just take a fucking break so your sister can stop accidentally messaging me.

 It was probably the same advice Jacob had sent, though his would have been phrased far nicer and in between stories of his life.

 Drop it Jack.

 If anything Miranda’s response pissed her off more. This wasn’t her problem, Miranda knew it, her kid sister knew it and the best thing to do was leave this to Jacob. Except that Jack was absolutely taking this as a challenge to annoy Miranda now.

 She scrolled around on the extranet for a little while, locating the closest escort service to where Miranda and Oriana were stationed and ordered the first person that came up on the screen.

 Enjoy.

 She grinned a little viciously as she typed that and laughed when she got back:

 Jack what did you do?

 It took an hour for the person to get there clearly because Jack didn’t get another message until then. She looked away from her far too many reports to look at it.

 You can’t be serious.

 Would you prefer EDI? Joker might share if he can tape it.

 I will block you.

 Jack could practically see the way Miranda was pursing her lips at that, trying hard not to be amused and claiming her disgust but Jack had seen her smiling at other jokes she’d made at the party.

 It was a victory for her at least.

 Here I thought we were becoming friends princess.

 A year ago I never would have thought that possible.

 Well if you’d stop sucking Cerberus’ dick earlier you’d realized I was right.

 That’s an image I won’t get out of my mind any time soon.

 Jack snickered to herself at the response and wondered if she could send a crude drawing over the extranet when a new message came in.

 Thank you Jack. Disturbing as it was I needed the laugh.

 She blinked at that, her hand stilling on top of Eezo who made a slight whuffling noise. “Well shit.” She said out loud, staring at the padd. Now she was undeniably worried, Miranda was thanking her of all people. Something must have gone wrong if she’d been able to help and Miranda was admitting that.

 Looking down at Eezo who had inched closer in his concern she groaned, “Stupid Shepard.” Now she actually cared about her ex-team mates. Even Miranda.

 Skimming through her list of duties she sent a message off to Kahlee requesting some time off, at least a month. Before Kahlee could respond she’d packed her bags and whistled for Eezo to follow her and “borrowed” a shuttle.

 She had a princess to kidnap.

 ~~

 Oriana was the one who opened the door and at the sight of Jack her eyebrows went up in surprise. “Aren’t you…” She began and Jack cut her off.

 “Looking for your sister.” Jack muscled her way past Oriana and through the door, Eezo bounded behind her and Oriana yelped at being pounced on.

 “Ori?” At the noise Miranda had come running, the blue glow of her biotics surrounding her as she was prepared to take on whatever was possibly threatening her sister. She stopped short when she saw Jack and Eezo, her mouth falling open a little in surprise before she straightened up, smoothing her face and clothes until everything was once again perfect.

 It didn’t make her want to punch Miranda right away though, instead Jack squinted and noticed that there were bags under Miranda’s eyes and the exhaustion was clear though probably only to people who knew her. Whatever stress she was under had gotten to Miranda, or maybe the fact that the war was over hadn’t sunk in.

 Jack snorted, “Well you look like shit.”

 Miranda rolled her eyes. “Did you come here just to tell me that?” She said drily and Jack grinned at the familiar banter. “Get your Varren off my sister Jack.”

 Jack glanced behind her, Oriana was now laughing as she tussled a little with Eezo. “Nah, I think she’s good.” Jack crossed her arms and looked back at Miranda. “Pack up, we gotta get going.”

 Miranda raised an eyebrow at her coolly, “Jack-”

 “T’Soni gave me coordinates to a Cerberus base that’s still up.” Jack said, looking Miranda straight in the eyes. “I’m going to destroy it and every last one of them.”

 That caught Miranda’s attention and Jack could see she was wavering between joining her and staying with Oriana.

 “Miri.” Oriana broke the silence, standing up with a bit of difficulty as Eezo still wanted to play. “You should go. I’ll be fine.”

 Jack had no siblings but she could recognize the tone of exasperation towards the end as the same one from her students who were trying to stubbornly prove they could handle themselves. She felt a kernel of guilt in her stomach at leaving without much of a goodbye. She had stopped in quickly to see Rodriguez and let her know what was going on but it was strange not being there with them now. She resisted the urge to squirm at the guilt, squashing it down with a frown.

 “Break the fucking leash cheerleader.” Jack sneered, trying to hit on Miranda’s anger.

 It worked as Miranda flashed her a quick glare which softened when she turned to look at Oriana. “I will be checking in.”

 Oriana rolled her eyes, reminding Jack so much of Miranda in that moment that Jack actually grinned. Miranda caught it and shot her a confused look but let it go when Oriana moved to hug her. “Be careful Miri.”

 It was the similarity between Oriana and her students that made Jack say, “I’ll make sure your sister doesn’t even break a nail.”

 “Knowing you it will be a rib instead.” Miranda muttered and then pretended she hadn’t said anything when Oriana pestered her about it.

 It took ten minutes for Miranda to pack. When she came back out she stared down at Eezo. “Is he coming?”

 “Yes.” Jack grinned. “Problem?”

 “Only that I’m not sure I’ll be able to tell which one is the wild creature on the ship.” Miranda deadpanned.

 “My bite is worse.” Jack smirked.

 “Of course it is.”

 ~~

 The shuttle was meant for two people. Not two people and a Varren but Jack refused to leave Eezo behind so they crowded into it and he curled up on one of the beds that Miranda instantly declared was Jack’s and not her own.

 It was an experimental shuttle with a modified FTL capable drive that some of the non-biotic Grissom Academy kids had made. In retrospect Kahlee would be furious at her for taking it but Jack didn’t really care.

 “Where’s the compound?” Miranda asked as she took a seat next to Jack by the controls.

 “Mnemosyne.” Jack had checked the information that Liara had sent her a few times to make sure.

 Miranda hummed, not sounding surprised, “They were probably stationed there to look for anything left of that derelict Reaper.”

 Jack had gone on that mission, she could remember the eerie quiet of the Reaper before the screams of husks and scions had pierced the air. “Fucking Reapers.” She swore, it seemed like even with Shepard destroying them they weren’t free of it. Not if Cerberus kept trying to mess about with them.

 “Based on their coded outgoing messages it looks like this was research for Sanctuary,” Miranda was scrolling through the notes that Liara had sent intently. “But that was months ago so what are they doing now…”

 “Hey I brought you along to answer that.” Jack shrugged, “I don’t give a shit what they were doing, I just want them gone.” She’d really only thought of the plan to take out Cerberus bases halfway to Miranda’s and had taken an hour to message Liara for the intel. She wasn’t about to tell Miranda that she’d visited on a whim and only then thought of an excuse.

 Miranda glanced over at her. “About that, Jack-” She sounded serious and Jack cut her off, not wanting to have the conversation at all.

 “I gotta feed Eezo, you drive.” She said roughly, practically jumping out of her seat and to where Eezo was.

 She didn’t look back but could feel Miranda’s disappointed and confused look burrowing into her.

 ~~

 “Recon is the best option first.” Miranda sighed as she said it, rubbing her forehead.

 “Fuck that, I say we go in there and just blow them up.” Jack paced as much as she could in the small cabin of the shuttle.

 “We should watch them, find the best entrance and then you can blow them up Jack.”

 It was reasonable. Jack hated it.

 “Way less entertaining.” Jack said and without another word blasted a shockwave at three of the guards.

 Miranda swore at her but was up in a second, firing off her own biotic blast and erecting a barrier when the guards started firing back at them.

 The air crackled around her as Jack formed another shockwave, a bigger one this time to take out every guard in front of them who were stupidly standing all together.

 Miranda even snorted at that and muttered ‘idiots’ under her breath. Clearly they didn’t have someone with a tactical mind in charge of the station like Miranda, which in Jack’s opinion would make this easier. Not that she’d tell Miranda that.

 It took five minutes to dispatch all the guards as they came rushing out, “Grunt would call this shooting pyjack in a den.” Miranda commented at one point as she slammed guards against the walls, maintaining her barrier with one hand.

 “I call this fun.” Jack’s heart raced in her chest with the adrenaline from a fight, she was more than ready to finish it and anyone else who stepped in her way.

 Alarms blared around them as they made their way into the base, stopping now and then for a fight with a scientist or for Miranda to hack into the computer to open a door for them. By the time they made it to the central hub Jack was certain they were the only two people left alive in this station.

 “We should have at least spared one to question them.” Miranda sighed as she looked at the mess around them.

 “You wanna bring them back all Shepard style be my guest. I don’t mind shooting them in the head again.” Jack nearly spat on the Cerberus logo that adorned someone’s coat, even after all this time and the help Shepard had given her she still couldn’t contain her anger when she saw that.

 Miranda noticed it and leveled her with a calm stare, “They’re gone Jack.”

 “Yet still pulling this shit.” Jack sneered and gestured towards the computer. “Let’s just find out if there’s anymore of them and blow this place to hell.”

 “You certainly know how to show a girl a good time.” Miranda said drily, shaking her head and Jack could just see her lips twitch upwards in amusement.

 Usually Jack would have made some innuendo at that, something about how she could show Miranda a better time back on the shuttle or how Miranda wouldn’t know a good time with the stick up her ass but her mouth felt dry suddenly and instead she crossed her arms and just grunted.

 Miranda’s fingers didn’t make a sound on the holographic keyboard and in the orange glow of it Jack could make out how relaxed Miranda looked as she poured over the information. Jack had no doubt that soon she’d formulate a plan for them to attack other bases and have the entire network figured out.

 “You’re staring.” Miranda’s voice cut through the silence but she didn’t look away from the screen.

 Jack scowled at her and for a bit of revenge sent the tiniest shockwave to just hit Miranda in the ass. She snickered as Miranda yelped and whirled around to glare at Jack. Jack grinned back at her, claiming the point in her favour.

 “It was a large target.” Jack said, shrugging.

 To her surprise Miranda smirked, “One that seems to have caught your attention.” She then turned back to the console, ignoring Jack once more.

 “Hey cheerleader-” Jack began before Miranda cut her off.

 “You know I don’t support Cerberus anymore Jack, that name hardly seems appropriate.”

 Jack rolled her eyes even if Miranda couldn’t see her, “Stop dressing like one then.”

 “And should I dawn belts instead?” Miranda glanced back, that smirk still on her lips.

 Jack shook off the mental image of Miranda dressed how she used to be, “Nah, you couldn’t pull it off. You’d need some ink.”

 “Yes that’s what I’m missing.” Miranda snorted, her voice carrying it’s usual dry sarcasm.

 “I could fix that.” Jack felt more comfortable now that conversation was back on neutral ground, even if she still was sneaking the occasional peek downwards at Miranda’s ass.

 “I’ll pass.” Miranda straightened suddenly, her omni tool coming to life and Jack could see she was transferring files on to it. “There’s three more bases like this.” Miranda said and frowned. “All looking at Reaper remains.”

 “On who’s order.” Jack’s biotics flashed slightly in her rage, in the idea that someone else had taken over Cerberus and was trying to raise it from the ground once more.

 “Still unclear.” Miranda looked as annoyed as Jack felt. “The encryption will take a while to crack.”

 “Weren’t you supposed to be perfect.” Jack sneered, her anger still rising.

 Miranda met her eyes, “I think we’ve both learned I’m not quite.”

 The confession took her by surprise and Jack blinked. “Well shit. And I thought the Reapers were the end of the galaxy.”

 “I’m certainly still better than anyone here. Their personalized encryption was a joke.” Miranda continued onwards.

 “There’s the ego that inflates your ass.” Jack replied, chuckling to herself.

 “Here I thought I you’d pay attention to my fantastic tits.” Miranda lowered her voice, like she was trying to imitate Jack’s words at the party.

 Jack looked over at them and crossed her arms. “Yeah, they’re probably inflated too.”

 Miranda hit her with a small slam that made Jack skid back a few steps. She just laughed instead of firing a biotic blast back, where before there would have been antagonism in all their actions now there was just somewhat companionable playing.  

 When they got back to the ship Jack whistled for Eezo and let him tackle Miranda for her revenge.

 ~~

 They took turns sleeping while the ship flew mostly on auto pilot to their next destination. Occasionally Miranda would try to bring up the reason why Jack had sought her out but Jack continuously ignored her in that. She wasn’t even sure she had the answer herself and wasn’t about to tell Miranda that she’d been worried about her.

 “You look less like shit.” Jack commented when she woke up to see Miranda looking over the encryption again.

 Miranda ignored her again in favour of continuing her efforts.

 When they arrived at the second planet Jack opted to take Eezo with them. Miranda took one look at the Varren and sighed but didn’t argue.

 “Good boy.” Jack complimented as Eezo wiped the floor with some of the guards. “Who’s my good boy.” She took the Varren’s face in her hands and roughly petted him. Behind her she could hear Miranda trying to stifle a laugh. “Hey he’s a better companion than you Lawson.” As soon as she said Miranda’s last name she nearly cursed at herself.

 “I think that’s the first time you’ve used my name.” Miranda crossed her arms. “I’m beginning to think you actually like me Jack.”

 Jack straightened up and barrelled past Miranda, hitting her with her shoulder as she walked by and scoffing. “Bite me cheerleader.”

 Miranda didn’t retort back and Jack turned to see her staring at Jack with a curious look on her face.

 “Well?” Jack said gruffly, “Let’s get the fuck on with this and blow it up.”

 Miranda followed her after a moments pause, Eezo bounded after them whuffling in what Jack thought of as a cheerful manner.

 If she’d been paying attention instead of focusing on how Miranda had looked at her Jack would have seen the person coming around the corner. Instead as it was she heard the rifle fire and felt a searing pain in her side.

 Her uninjured side hit the wall with her balance thrown off. “You-” She began, biotics crackling around her when the man was slammed so hard into the corridor that the metal bent around him.

 “Jack!” Miranda’s worried face came into her vision and a hand covered hers over the wound.

 “It’s fine.” Jack insisted. “Dipshit couldn’t even make a good shot.” For all that she said that her side felt like it was on fire. “Ah hell, I’m going to have to redo the tats there.” Jack looked down at her side with a frown.

 “You’re worried about your tats?” Miranda sighed, “No of course you are.” Eezo darted around them, whimpering now in his concern.

 “Just slap some medigel on it.” Jack said, wincing as she moved slightly.

 “Fine.” Miranda finally relented. “But I’m taking a look at this when we’re back on the shuttle.”

 Jack grumbled but let it go, she’d just duck out of Miranda’s grasps on the shuttle by putting Eezo between them or something. The medigel was freezing at her side in stark contrast to the rifle burn but it also numbed the pain and Jack was ready to move within the minute.

 Miranda summoned a barrier around them and when Jack shot her a look she shrugged, “Just in case.”

 If Jack noticed that the barrier was covering herself more than it was Miranda she didn’t say anything.

 ~~

 With the rest of the scientists taken care of Miranda had gotten a new encryption to look at and compare to the one at the old base. She didn’t pause to look at it though like before, just loaded it up on her omni tool and began to drag Jack back to the shuttle.

 “If you died on my watch Shepard would come back somehow and kill me.” Miranda stated when Jack complained.

 “Shit if I died on your watch I’d haunt your ass.” Jack said.

 “You’ve really got a fascination with my ass recently.” Miranda noted and pushed Jack into a bunk when she reached the shuttle. Miranda paused and looked down at her, “Including worrying about it it seems.”

 “Shit.” Jack wasn’t drunk enough or high enough on painkillers to have this conversation. She opened her mouth to call for Eezo but was cut off when Miranda kissed her. Jack reached out automatically, resting her hands on Miranda’s hips and deepening the biting kiss.

 “Don’t worry.” Miranda said when she pulled back, her lips puffy where Jack had bit them, “I won’t read anything in to this.” Even as she said it Jack knew that there was in fact something there to read in to but if Miranda didn’t want to touch it yet then she didn’t either.

 “So about your ass…” Jack slid her hands down and leered at Miranda.

 Miranda rolled her eyes, “I’m not sleeping with you in front of your Varren.” She told Jack. “And we have to get you fixed up first.”

 “Pussy.” Jack muttered but let Miranda poke at her wound and attend to it with medi kit in the shuttle. For the first time since they’d left she actually regretted bringing Eezo with her. “You know he can sleep outside for the night.”

 Miranda paused for a second, clearly considering it. “We’re sleeping in my bunk.” She said. “Yours smells like Varren.”

 Jack grinned in victory.

 ~~

 “Did you plan this.” Miranda asked, her hair billowing around her on the pillow, streaked with sweat.

 “Nah.” Jack stretched, wincing as she pulled on her newly healed wound. “I just wanted to blow up some Cerberus bases.”

 Miranda raised a hand and slid it down Jack’s side to rest on her wound, warming it beneath her fingers. “You can admit you were worried you know.” Miranda smirked. “Showing up at my door when Ori said I wasn’t doing so well, you hardly hid it Jack.”

 “Fuck you.” Jack mumbled, turning her face into the pillow.

 “Well you’ve done that.” Miranda admitted, making Jack let out a surprising bark of laughter.

 “Thought you weren’t going to read in to this.” Jack said when her laughter died down. “I think we had a deal princess.”

 “I liked it better when you using my last name.” Miranda was silent for a moment. “You weren’t a mistake you know.”

 “What?” Jack raised her head a little, squinting at Miranda in the pale light they had from above.

 “I said that once. I regret it.” Miranda admitted. “I was wrong.”

 “Didn’t we already have this fucking talk at Shepard’s party.” Jack groaned, her stomach twisting uneasily. She hated all this feelings shit.

 “Fair enough.” Miranda shrugged and her hand slid off Jack’s side, making her shiver in the cold it left.

 “Hey.” Jack said, turning so she wasn’t looking at Miranda and was staring at the pillow instead. “I guess I don’t hate you as much as I did.”

 She heard Miranda chuckle. “But you still do?” Jack didn’t answer and thankfully Miranda didn’t press. Instead she returned her hand back where it had been over Jack’s wound and shut her eyes. “I can live with that.”

 Jack raised her own hand and rested it on Miranda’s stomach, right where her wound was when she had fought Kai Leng.

 “Shut up, Lawson.” Jack said, pressing her fingers down so hard she could feel Miranda’s pulse underneath them. “Some of us are trying to fucking sleep.”

 Miranda snorted but didn’t say anything else. Jack didn’t move to her own bunk like she was planning on to before.

 ~~

 When she woke up Miranda was already at the console and Eezo was snoring on Jack’s bunk while kicking in the air occasionally.

 She dragged herself up with a groan, popping the joints in her shoulder and quickly getting ready. When she joined Miranda at the front of the shuttle she saw that Miranda was still looking at the encryption files.

 “Didn’t think you’d take this long.” Jack commented, she couldn’t pass up the opportunity to tease Miranda that she still hadn’t cracked it.

 Miranda made some kind of noise that could have been agreement but didn’t look away from the console. Jack shoved her lightly in the thigh with her booted foot and Miranda turned to scowl at her.

 “Really Jack?”

 “Hey I just want to know what’s taking so long. I wanted these things gone by now.” It had actually gone quicker than Jack expected, courtesy of Miranda and by her smirk Miranda seemed to know that.

 “I think we may have to get something I left back with Ori. She’s got some colony encryption codes and it looks like these were sent to someone out in the traverse.” Miranda ran a hand through her hair and then smoothed it back down. Jack resisted the urge to lean over the seats to kiss her and muss with her hair again.

 “So we drop in, get it, and go back to kicking ass.” Jack shrugged.

 “If that’s how you want to think of it. We can stop in to see Chakwas so she can take a look at your wound.” Miranda plugged the coordinates in.

 “Now that we’re sleeping together are you going to be a fucking pain in my ass about this shit.” Jack frowned.

 “Oh I’m aware I can’t stop you Jack.” Miranda replied, “But since I’ve taken control of this mission-”

 “I sure as fuck didn’t agree to that.”

 “You did actually.” Miranda grinned, “You agreed that you were on my watch. Something about haunting my ass.” Jack rolled her eyes, of course Miranda remembered that. “Besides,” Miranda continued. “I think it’s also still up to if we are still going to be sleeping together after this.”

 She was leaving the choice up to Jack which somehow irked her, like she needed to be coddled. Jack was tempted to end it right there for that reason alone but then she’d have to cut off communication with Miranda again and would probably never hear from her. That didn’t sit well with her either.

 “Like I said.” Jack spoke before Miranda could notice her internal struggle, “You’ve got fantastic tits.”

 “So that’s a yes?”

 “We do have a long ride back to your place.” Jack grinned at her.

 “I told you I’m not sleeping with you in front of your Varren.”

 “Prude.”

 ~~

 Oriana was surprised to see them back so soon but when Miranda asked her for the codes she told Miranda where they were quickly enough.

 “She seems better.” Oriana said as Miranda walked into another room.

 “Like I said,” Jack shrugged, “You just needed to get your sister laid.”

 Oriana glanced at Jack from the corner of her eyes and Jack caught an all too familiar smirk. “That’s why I messaged you right.”

 Jack was gobsmacked for a second before she laughed uproariously. “Shit, you played us both.”

 Oriana grinned, rocking back on her feet. “Miri missed you too you know, she kept checking up on Grissom Academy in her extranet searches.”

 Jack let that sink in for a second, she’d lord that over Miranda later. “Who says I missed her.”

 “The fact that you responded at all.” Oriana definitely had an eviler streak than her sister, Jack couldn’t help but approve of it.

 “Did you even message Taylor?” Jack asked, somewhat curious.

 Oriana shook her head at the same time that Miranda came out. She looked between the two of them curiously but they both just grinned at her.

 “Jack don’t influence Oriana.” Miranda ordered as she walked towards her, stopping only to hug her sister once more.

 “Too late.” Jack muttered under her breath and nodded at Oriana who waved them out cheerfully. As they walked out the door Jack gave up resisting the urge and rested her hand on Miranda’s ass.

 “Jack.” Miranda began in warning.

 “C’mon cheerleader.” Jack pressed her along by pushing on her ass lightly with no regrets. “Let’s go blow up some Cerberus assholes.” She twisted her neck and called back to Oriana, “Hey look after Eezo.”

 She heard Oriana’s confused ‘what’ right before Eezo tackled her.

 “I suppose you think this means you’re going to get lucky.” Miranda said drily, looking over at Jack but she hadn’t removed Jack’s hand from where it was as they reached the shuttle.

 Jack didn’t answer, smirking back at her instead and shutting the shuttle door behind them.

[wmaitla]

40k Factions Headcanons Part 3

Mkay, moving on to part 3 of my series where I explain how I’d change the armies of 40k if I woke up one morning and had control of GW. Holy shit this is taking so much more time and effort than I thought it would. Well at least with this one I’ll be finished all the Imperial armies. So when it’s done I’ll have finished three multi-hour writing efforts out of... ten?

sob

Also, something I left out of the start of the first post - there is no allies system in my version of Warhammer 40k. You get what’s in your codex and nothing else. The point of my redesigns is to give each faction a distinctive feel, both thematically and in terms of their playstyle. If you can just mix-and-match freely when you listbuild it makes it much harder to balance the game, because you have to playtest each unit fighting alongside every other unit in the game rather than just the ones in the same codex. If you want to run something that the codexes don’t allow (Gue’vesa Auxiliaries for example, or a strike force of Chaos Space Marines) you can just use the “count as” rule, using different models for one of the codex entries. It won’t make everyone happy. Remember, my redesign is based around getting the themes of the Guard across while ensuring they have a distinctive feel and playstyle, and that each unit is distinct enough that there’s little “overlap”.

Imperial Guard

The Imperial Guard (or the Astra Militarum if you’re a GW exec trying to maximize your intellectual property) can be both the least “40k” of all the army factions and the most “40k” of them. On the one hand, factions like the Death Corps of Krieg and units like Commissars really capture the feel of 40k and of the Imperium. On the other hand, its very easy to write the Guard as being a fundamentally good, human force triumphing over the horrors of the galaxy. This is a trap. There are no “good guys” in 40k, especially not the Imperium. The themes of the Guard are humanity and inhumanity. The Guard is about sending countless humans to fight and die in suicidal actions against the most horrific enemies in the galaxy because it protects humanity. Or because your commander is an incompetent blue blood who only received a commission because of your obnoxiously rich family and his brilliant military strategy was to bayonet charge Ork Nobs. The Guard is about executing a man because he took poor care of his lasgun, because the Guardsman is infinitely more replaceable and therefore worth substantially less than the single most-available weapon in the galaxy. It’s about ordering tens thousands of young people to charge across an open field at a Tau gunline - because the Tau will run out of ammo before you run out of conscripts.

The Guard protects humanity, but it doesn’t value humans. Crunch-wise I’d want to emphasise that, with the focus being on squads rather than individual models. Here’s a quick run down of the list I’d use to make up the Guard:

HQ Command Squad - as is. Nothing wrong with orders, nothing wrong with an Imperial Guard Classic.

Tank Commander - for armies themed around hordes of tanks. Can issue orders to other tanks. Can also take side sponsons, unlike regular tanks.

Commissars - You can take 1-3 of these guys as one HQ choice, and assign each one to an infantry squad while you’re setting up. They allow you to sacrifice one member of that unit to re-roll a failed leadership check, but if you still fail, you remove the Commissar. I’d leave priests out, except in the Command Squad, and let these guys have the “morale buff” role instead. I originally had them in the Elites section, but it was getting pretty crowded, and a bunch of ordinary humans makes more sense for the guard than one big heroic human, so they’re replacing the Lord Commissar here.

Elites Scions - because “storm troopers” has unfortunate connotations, and “Tempestus” sounds stupid. These guys are pretty standard, they have carapace armour and hot-shot lasguns. They have higher leadership than regular guardsmen too. Can take a rhino, a taurox or a chimera

Ogryns/Bullgryns - big guys with big guns. These guys are the biggest, meatiest guys you have. But this is the guard, and they aren’t space marines (why don’t space marines recruit these guys???), so I’d actually nerf them somewhat. They’re still str/tou 4, but they only have one wound each. They get carapace armour and either shotguns (str 4 assault 2) or power mauls and force shields (5+ invuln save). Because they’re smaller than they used to be, they can ride in Metal Bawxes now (and because they’re meant for seizing objectives, so being able to ride in a troop transport is rather important). They’re still giant brutish abhumans, but they aren’t superhuman.

Tech-Priest - Able to restore wounds to nearby tanks and provides a buff to all nearby vehicles (he helps calm the machine spirits with his chanting). This guy is the closest

Psykers - not astropaths, which are in the command squad, but some kind of “Militarum Choir”. Lay psykers discovered by the guard and herded together as a kind of psychic battery. More of them working together makes them more powerful, but they can still fail a perils of the warp check and all turn inside out together.

Troops Guardsmen - because “conscripts” would be redundant. A squad of between 10 and 30 cheap-as-chips guardsmen, wearing flak armour (which I am VERY tempted to say only gives you a 6+ armour save) and carrying lasguns. They have leadership 6, but can use a command squad’s leadership instead if the CS is alive and on the table. For each full 10 Guardsmen you can take one special weapon (plasma gun/grenade launcher/sniper rifle) and one heavy weapon (heavy bolter/missile launcher/autocannon/lascannon). I’m leaving flamers and melta weapons off these guys, because these ones fit the Guard better (especially Gets Hot! plasma guns over melta guns). I was tempted to have the “platoon” system from yesteryear, and have them be two separate squads of guardsmen and a platoon command squad, but this is simpler. Can’t take troop transports.

Veterans - guardsmen with one extra point of BS and Leadership, in squads of 5-10. They can take camo cloaks, which gives a +1 to cover saves, and they can infiltrate if they don’t have a troop transport. For each five of them in a squad they can take two special weapons (plasma gun/grenade launcher/sniper rifles/flamers). These are the guys you take if you want a wholly mechanised force of guardsmen. I swapped the Scions and these guys around because it makes more sense for these guys to be more available than the scions, and because the scions were actually “Elite”.

Transport Chimera - Old Reliable. A middle ground between the Rhino and the Taurox, a multi-laser and a pintle-mounted storm bolter give it some firepower while retaining a full 12-man troop compartment, although its armour is light than the rhino’s. It’s on-board generator means the turn its unit disembarks they can re-roll to-hit rolls of 1 with their lasguns/hotshot lasguns.

Rhino - big and beefy, gets you there safely although not heavily armed. The quintessential Metal Bawx.

Taurox - the Immolator of the IG. Has a top-mounted autocannon, but can only carry 6 people.

Fast Attack Sentinels - ah, the chicken walkers. Nothing wrong with these, although I would give them Heavy Flamers and Plasma Cannons in addition to Autocannons/Heavy Bolters/etc. The they can be upgraded with extra amour, but lose the ability to scout.

Hellhounds - a squad of 1-3 scouting tanks. Same armour as a Chimera, but their troop compartments and multi lasers are replaced by a giant flame thrower/acid sprayer. Can receive orders from tank commander.

Roughriders - 5-20 hugely mustachioed men on horseback. Same as they are pretty much, good for taking objectives but piss poor at holding them (their lances count as power weapons on the turn they charge). Allow you to relive the charge of the light brigade in space.

Ratlings - they have to go somewhere, and the Elites section is full enough as is. On second thought, I’d actually drop these little guys and just say their models now “count as” veterans with sniper rifles. There’s nothing they do that the infiltrating vets with camo cloaks don’t do already. There’s no point having TWO units of infiltrating snipers, and Gaunt’s Ghost have a hit book series, so they get first dibs.

Heavy Support Leman Russ Squadron - these guys would actually get stripped down. The emphasis in the guard is quantity over quality, so I’d still have them packing big turret guns and thick armour, but I’d lose the side sponsons (they still have the hull-mounted gun though) and any special rules they might have in order to keep them as cheap and mass-producible as possible. All the flavours of Leman Russ can be mixed and matched here. These can receive tank orders.

Artillery Squadron - wyverns, basilisks, and death strikes.Basically any tank that shoots things it can’t see from your edge of the board, so they don’t have to share a squadron with Leman Russes on the front line. Death strikes are still random, but they share squads with horde-killing wyverns and tank-busting basilisks. These can receive tank orders.

I left out Heavy Weapon Platoons, because they don’t really seem to fit in too well - if you can give every two guardsmen a plasma cannon, why not do that? It makes more sense for the heavy weapons to be mixed in with the regular troops I feel. This has lead to the unfortunate demise of the mortar squad however. RIP little dudes, your dropping mortar shells on Orks in heaven now.

Super Heavies Baneblades - because it wouldn’t be the guard without them. Say it with me now - ELEVEN BARRELS OF HELL.

Imperial Knights - because they have to go somewhere, they’re popular enough that trying to drop them would lead to an uproar. Plus these giant warmachines actually fit in quite well with the guard.

Playstyle-wise, they’re similar to Tyranids, but the focus is on shooting rather than melee. They’re the Tau to the Tyranids’ Sisters of Battle, a horde interested in keeping its distance from the enemy and whittling them down with mass firepower rather than rushing in close.

Fluff-wise, I wouldn’t change much, besides emphasising that the guard and the imperium aren’t the good guys, and that the guard doesn’t value individual humans at all, even though its charge with protecting humanity. I’d make sure to have a lot of stories in the codex about guardsmen and -women being executed for cowardice, being sent on suicidal mass-charges, etc. Basically using North Korean/world war one military strategy, which suits the bleak tone of the 41st Millenium more than heroic world war two stuff. I’ve already said everything I really wanted to say about this at the start of this article.

So yeah. That’s how I’d redesign the imperial guard. Tune in next time to read my ramblings about how I’d change the Chaos so they aren’t just Space Marines with spiky bits.

[chaifootsteps]

Bloodborne OC Meme

Name: Cyrillus William Clive Percival Seamere-Lamridge, 7th Marquis of Belbank. Nickname(s): Cyril. Age: 33 Gender: Male. Sexuality: Yes. Height/Build: 6′1″

Personality description: Cyril wears his heart on his sleeve. Posh, prim, and occasionally flighty, he craves company and validation in equal measures and lives almost solely in the moment. He’s ravenous for knowledge and experiences, and insists on gentlemanly decorum at all times -- even when smoking in seedy dens. Laughs as an alternative to crying.

Physical description: Tall, dark, and in possession of a long, lush, luxuriously thick tangle hair he’s rather obsessive about. Wears a monocle he doesn’t even need.

BACKSTORY

Introduce your hunter and their backstory.

Which class/origin did you choose for your hunter? Does this tie into their backstory? Lone Survivor. Cyril is the last known scion of the Seamere-Lamridge line, and to the best of his knowledge, the only reamining survivor of the Belbank Massacre. When he was 6 years old, his family was hit in the middle of a family reunion – poisoned, then set upon by assassins – and wiped out in the space of a single night. Cyril has several ideas of who was behind it and why, but has never been able to nail down anything concrete. At age 14, he was taken in by one Lord Tristan Weiland, who was more than content to take advantage of his insecurity and finance his vices.

Where is your hunter from? What brought them to Yharnam? Originally from the prosperous ruling family of an idyllic farming territory, he was bundled off to a convent in the west and lived there until the age of 13. He has sickle cell anemia and came to Yharnam in search of a cure.

Did your hunter know any of the characters from the game before they entered the Hunter’s Dream? Not a single one.

Had they fought beasts before entering the Dream, or is this their first experience as a hunter?  He’s fought plenty of people that could be considered beasts, several dogs, and one bear.

CHARACTER DETAILS

How do they react to first waking up in the Hunter’s Dream? Do they remember anything about their life before the Dream?

He remembers everything, unfortunately. But given that he expected not to wake up at all, the Hunter’s Dream comes as a pleasant surprise.

Do they align themselves with any Covenants or other factions (the Healing Church, the Choir, the Old Hunters, the Unseen Village, etc)?

He’ll forge alliances left and right as a means to an end, but taking up Eileen’s mantle is probably the closest he’s come to sincerely aligning with a faction.

Do they befriend any NPCs in particular? Make enemies of any NPCs?

He’ll happily befriend anyone who doesn’t chase him off with a stick. He looks up to Eileen like a grandmother, gets along famously with Djura, and after politely declining her offer of a blowjob, enjoys swapping stories with Arianna. In particular, he has a special soft spot for the Oedon Chapel Dweller, and will contentedly sit there talking to him until their jaws ache.

Are they in a relationship? If so, with whom?

He falls hard and fast for Gilbert, and the feeling isn’t exactly unrequited. It ends about as well as you’d expect.

How does your hunter feel about the Healing Church? About blood ministration?

He doesn’t know enough about any of these factions to feel anything about them.

Do they fear the scourge? Are they afraid of turning into a beast? Afraid of becoming blood-addled? Of the unknown Cosmos? What are they afraid of?

Brainsuckers. They’re the only part of this whole business to actually scare him. Everything else, he can handle.

Does your hunter relish in the Hunt or revile their bloody work?

In the beginning, he relishes just about every moment of it. It’s wild and visceral, an impossible challenge, and best of all, the pain that’s plagued him all his life is gone. If it were only bonfires and open streets and beasts to kill and no innocent lives caught in the crossfire, he could happily go on doing it forever.

When Gilbert turns, most of the laughter goes out of him. 

What is your hunter’s attitude towards Gehrman? Do they resent being trapped in the Hunter’s Dream?

He liked Gehrman well enough right up until the moment he invited him to “use” the doll. Very, very few things can shake Cyril from Happy Fun Land, and that would be one of them.

Does your hunter sympathize and associate with fellow hunters, or are they more of a loner who avoids other hunters? Do they leave notes for other hunters?

If they let him, sure.

Does your hunter worship the Great Ones? Do they worship blood? Or do they have a different belief system? If they’re not devout, what do they value or prioritize in life?

He’s pretty much agnostic.

Do they have a special place where they feel safe or “at home”? Is there a place they’re afraid of or that they avoid?

The Hunter’s Dream soothes him without being too quiet or open. He spends most of his time there reading or napping.

It’s not so much a place, but the singing of the Wintern Lanterns never fails to make him feel safe.

Are there any particular items your hunter holds onto for sentimental reasons, or items that serve to comfort them?

He holds onto the Flamesprayer long after it ceases to be any real use in a fight.

Do any of the discoveries in the game (about the old blood, the Healing Church, the Great Ones, etc) shock them? How do they react to these revelations?

He’s always believed that there are stranger things in Heaven and earth. The Great Ones don’t scare him because they’re grotesque so much as the fact that they’re eldritch horrors. There’s horror there, but only because physically, there can’t not be.

Does your hunter want to discover the secrets of the Healing Church and the origins of the scourge, or do they just want to kill some beasts and escape the Dream? What motivates them?

He’s just out to have a good time before death finally catches up to him. It’s not until the list of casualties begins to mount that this whole thing ceases to be fun for him, and he starts to look for a way to actually fix all of this.

How does your hunter feel about being effectively immortal? How do the unending deaths affect them over the course of their time in the Dream?

He quickly learns to like it. It feels interesting.

COMBAT AND STATS

Which primary stat does your hunter most rely on (Strength, Skill, Bloodtinge, Arcane)? Do they prioritize Vitality or Endurance?

Strength and skill. They’re pretty much equally set, along with his strength and vitality stats.

What are your hunter’s trick weapon and firearm of choice? Why?

Saw cleaver and Ludwig’s blade, hunter pistol.

Do they make use of any hunter tools?

Not really.

What type of armor do they wear? Why?

Crowfeather set. He likes Eileen.

Describe their fighting style.

He hits hard and fast and then slips away like a greased pig.

Which Caryll runes does your hunter keep equipped?

Radiance.

How much Insight does your hunter have? How does this affect them?

Quite a bit, largely because I like to hoard it and hate to spend it.

Does your hunter take advantage of Beasthood to fuel their attacks? How does it affect them?

I meant to have him do this, but he never did. Sorry, Cyril.

Is there a beast or type of enemy your hunter likes to fight? An enemy they avoid?

He enjoys fighting Executioners (of the giant axe variety) and steers clear of Brainsuckers. He enjoys fighting quick, fast moving enemies over impossibly massive ones.

Do they often summon the Old Hunters or hunters from other worlds to aid them?

Never.

PLOT DECISIONS

Does your hunter’s story deviate from the central plot of Bloodborne? In what way?

I mean, I’m pretty sure the central plot of Bloodborne didn’t see the Hunter cuddling with Gilbert.

Does your hunter try to rescue any of the civilians of Yharnam? Are they successful?

He rescued everyone he could.

Does your hunter kill the Impostor Iosefka or let her continue her work?

Killed her but good.

Do they fight Djura or befriend him? What about Eileen the Crow?

He not only befriended Djura – he kept up his end of the bargain and stayed out of Old Yarnham. Saving Eileen the Crow was one of his proudest moments and he happily wears her armor.

Do they choose to side with Alfred or Queen Annalise?

Alfred because that man is soft and good.

Does your hunter enter the Chalice Dungeons?

He entered them, but I think he finds them as monotonous as I do.

Does your hunter enter the Hunter’s Nightmare? Do they defeat the Orphan of Kos?

He did. Defeating the Orphan of Kos brought him no satisfaction, and he actually broke down in helpless tears afterwards.

What is your hunter’s final choice at the end of the game?

He refused Gehrman’s offer, not knowing what it would mean for him; just that he’d gone too far to go back to the life he’d known. In his mind, even if the transfusion only granted him one more night in the end, it had been a long and enlightening one, and he was content to give in to whatever was waiting for him. 

He took the cords and smiled as the Moon Presence enveloped him, at peace with whatever adventure awaited him next.

[swtorramblings]

Travels Part 2: Fallen Idol

Art commissioned with gratitude from @fleeting-sanity. Any mangling of the art is my fault.

Summary: Koth calls in his favor for rescuing Vaylin, with a surprising request. 1076 words.

I Shall Save Myself - Chapter List

Part of “I Shall Save Myself”, beginning with The Final Chain

Last chapter: Travels Part 1: Street Fight

Senya was already worried. Her daughter had left Odessan with Kaliyo her only escort. Her son was preparing for a risk that might destroy him. And in the middle of this, Koth wanted an audience.

She stood, looking out at the stars rather than sitting on the throne. She had come to hate it. It was a monstrous thing, one of many that she had needed to accept. The throne. The enslaved Gemini droids. The Scions. The devotion of the people of Zakuul. She took small comfort that things were changing, but they were changing much too slowly.

Koth entered the throne room and walked to the position where most supplicants stopped. To Senya’s shock, he knelt. He looked up from that position and said, “My Empress, I crave a boon.”

She looked down at him and couldn’t help but think that this had to be Vaylin’s doing. Koth would never have thought to kneel to get to Senya. He was creative, and could be creatively annoying, but that just would never have occurred to him. She muttered, “Skyva’s tears, Daughter, what did you say to him?” Aloud, she said, “Oh, do stand up, Vortena. Bowing and scriping does not suit you.”

He did stand, but said, with his hand in front of his mouth, “I am sorry, my Empress, does my manner not please you?”

Taking a deep breath, willing herself to be calm, Senya gave up and played the role. “It is pleasing enough. What is it you wish? I do owe you a boon, within reason.”

His smile faded and he said more seriously, “I would like permission to travel to Nathema, which you have forbidden. I would like to be allowed passage through the blockade of the Eternal Fleet, and be allowed to return.”

“Why?” She was shocked. First Arcann, now Koth? What was the attraction of that cursed planet? “Why would you want to go there?”

“I have my reasons, and promise that they’re nothing you would disapprove of. I’d like to keep them to myself for now. May I go?”

She stared for several moments before responding. She had to consciously restrain her senses. He would keep his secrets. “Very well. I see no harm in you going of your own free will. There is nothing there that should harm you, though you should be cautious of the predators. I will command the Fleet to let you pass.”

He nodded and turned, preparing to leave, but stopped for a moment to say, “Thank you, Senya.” He then left on his mysterious errand.

Koth had needed to know, to feel the world for himself. It was disturbing, but not quite what he had expected. It was not lifeless, it was more the opposite of life, somehow. It was not inert, it was pulling at him, pulling at any living thing that came here. It was trying to destroy him.

And it was powerful. He had been tested, like many Zakuulians, for Force potential. None had ever been found in him. He still felt this world’s corruption, just barely. What would a sensitive feel here? 

What kind of agony did Vaylin feel?

Vette had acquired Alliance records of the last visit here. He had every right to them, but he hadn’t wanted anyone to know that he was looking into it. He trusted Vette not to talk about it. He had watched them all, just after meeting Senya. And again on the trip through hyperspace. He hadn’t believed it the first time.

The Eternal Emperor, Zakuul’s hero, his hero, had sent her here. There was no other explanation. He had condoned the rituals, the tortures, the brainwashing. On this destroyed world that would leave her in constant pain. He had done that to his own daughter, his supposed favorite. He was the only one that could, the Sanitarium was his, the people were his, the world was his. How could he?

And if he was capable of doing that to her, what had he done to his sons? To Senya? What had the others closest to him suffered?

What had the monster Koth had worshipped done to Zakuul?

Everything they had told him had been true. The Commander, Lana, Theron. Valkorion was the thing they had pursued across the galaxy. Koth had doubted, but knowing what the Emperor had done to his own family made it easier to accept the rest. Koth had the word of people he trusted, he’d had the evidence. He just hadn’t been able to accept it. Now he had no choice.

Arcann and Vaylin had both done terrible things. Burned worlds, killed their own servants, continued the tortures and enslavement that their father had inflicted on them. All in an attempt to free themselves, perhaps, but that was no reason for it. So many crimes could never be balanced. But they seemed to both be trying to in their ways. He had not thought they should have that chance. Perhaps he’d been wrong.

And maybe he and all of Zakuul needed that chance, also.

Once again, Senya was standing in the throne room, gazing at the stars, waiting for Vortena. This time, he did not leave her waiting long. He entered the throne room and approached her, not kneeling this time, but stopping about five meters away.

“May I approach?” he asked.

He was full of surprises recently. “Of course.”

He walked to her and held out his hands, palms up. She took them in hers and watched him closely, wondering what he was doing.

Tears stood out in his eyes, something she never thought she or anyone else would ever see.

“I’m sorry, Senya. I didn’t know. I didn’t want to. He was a monster. What I know he did to your daughter, what he must have done to your sons. What he did to whole worlds. What it all cost you. And I defended him. Can you ever forgive me?”

She gripped his hands more tightly. “There is nothing to forgive. He deceived everyone, his order, two Empires. Both of us, set to fight one another instead of fighting him. But, if you wish forgiveness, anyway, I will forgive you if you forgive me.”

He grinned, looking more like his old self. “Done.”

She let go of his hands. “Good. Thank you, Koth. I feel like you have earned a break. I know I have, and the bar is well stocked.”

“Am I worthy to share a drink with an Empress?”

“Not in the slightest. But I’ll let you share a drink with me. Besides, I owe you a song.”

[kuriquinn]

The More Things Change...

Disclaimer & Masterpost

Summary: Asuma is probably laughing at them from the Great Beyond.

AN: So, as I promised, I will finish my NarutoWeek2017 fic prompts...even if they are unforgivably late haha. Hm, I should probably put them all in one place, huh?

The sun is just reaching its zenith on an lamentably cloudless day when Shikamaru steps foot in the dining area of the YakinikuQ and glances around in search of his friends. They aren’t there yet, which makes him groan and try to decide if he should bother getting a table now or just come back in a little while.

It’s a rare day off for him, and he doesn’t feel like wasting it inside more than he has to.

It turns out, there’s more that goes into being an advisor to the Hokage than he expected. Shizune is a relentless (and unnaturally organized) taskmaster, with a certain lack of patience born of working with a temperamental woman like Tsunade. Most of the work is tedious enough that he could do it in his sleep, but whenever Kakashi decides to do something unpredictable, every bit of planning gets thrown up in the air.

Considering Naruto is about a hundred times more unpredictable, Shikamaru suspects his future is going to be one long, unending game of shogi.

That in mind, he doesn’t feel like spending his diminishing free time waiting around for his late comrades.

Turning to leave, he pauses when he notices the back booth of the restaurant, and the occupants therein; Kurenai is sitting there, obviously trying to fight off laughter, while Gai sits in his wheelchair beside her, balancing baby Mirai on his lap. Raising an eyebrow in curiosity, Shikamaru wanders over.

“Hey,” he says when they both notice his approach, and nods at Kurenai. “I haven’t seen you out in a while.”

“Mirai finally finished cutting that first tooth,” Kurenai tells him, pride and exhaustion plain in her features. “Today was the first day in a week she’s been pleasant enough to go out, and so I took a chance. Then we ran into Gai at the park and he insisted on treating us to lunch.”

“Motherhood is a most arduous trial – you need to keep your strength up,” Gai agrees. “You will be a most excellent example of fortitude to your daughter! Even now, I can already feel the great strength she possesses!”

He indicates the death-grip the baby has on one of his eyebrows.

“Also, it means I don’t have to cook,” Kurenai says in a lower voice. “Or worse – microwave.”

“You should have said something,” Shikamaru reminds her. “I can bring you food. My mother always cooks too much these days.”

It’s been difficult adjusting to his father’s death. He’s not sure what’s worse – the constant barrage of reminders that hit him at odd moments of the day, or the way his tough and snappy mother sometimes breaks down crying apropos of nothing.

Kurenai’s eyes soften in understanding.

“I may take you up on that,” she tells him gently. “Mirai will no doubt have more teeth coming in soon, and I won’t be able to take her anywhere for a while.”

Shikamaru nods stiffly at this.

“Shikamaru, you’re a man now – you should join us for a drink,” Gai suggests. Kurenai coughs, and he amends, “Well, me. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with drinking tea – in fact, we should all have some tea together and drink as comrades!”

“Thank you, but now,” he says. “I’m supposed to have lunch with Ino and Chōji. Assuming they show up. Everyone’s so busy lately, they might just cancel.”

“Ah, I know that feeling,” Gai says, gently catching Mirai’s grabby hands with his. His expression turns uncharacteristically sober. “I never even see Kakashi anymore unless I have an appointment. It makes engaging in youthful competition difficult.”

Shikamaru snorts, because of course Gai sees the only obstacle to his ridiculous contests as being Kakashi’s busy schedule – not his own damaged body.

“At least everyone is just busy,” Kurenai points out thoughtfully. “You know that once the reconstruction is over, things will be back to normal.”

“Will they?” Shikamaru challenges before he can think better of it.

 “As normal as they can be,” Kurenai amends quietly.

They are all silent for a tense spell, everyone thinking of their own losses. It is Gai who breaks that lull.

“I may not have lost a father as you did, or even a husband…but my students are the closest thing I will ever have to children,” the taijutsu master says. “Losing Neji was like losing a son. And I don’t know if he ever knew that.” He fixes Shikamaru in a firm gaze, for once free of his over-emotional tears. “Mark my words, young Shikamaru, you must savour the people in your life – and tell them how important they are to you – while you are youthful enough to do it.”

“Uh…sure…”

“And on that note – you should sit with us and drink! To the past and to the glorious, vigorous future we all have ahead of us!” Gai shouts.

“Hey! Shikamaru!”

He is saved by responding to find Chōji and Ino across the room, being led to their usual booth. Ino looks as coifed as usual, albeit a bit paler than he’s used to her seeing, and Chōji is at his skinniest.

“Excuse me,” he says to the other shinobi, earning a nose-crinkling smile of understanding from Kurenai. “I hope you enjoy the rest of your meal.”

“We shall! And afterwards, I will challenge my new erstwhile opponent to a feat of shouting!” Gai declares. “Go on, young Mirai, show off your commitment to youth!”

Mirai puts her fist in her mouth.

“Do you see? Kurenai, look at that resolve!”

Shikamaru rolls his eyes and leaves Kurenai to deal with Gai. He has a feeling that teething or not, she’s probably rethinking her need to leave the house again anytime soon…

“He never changes, does he?” Ino asks as he sits down, her eyes on the exuberant green-clad man. But there is no repudiation in her voice, and rather than a mocking smirk, she smiles fondly. She has come a long way from the judgmental kid she once was.

“Unlike us,” Shikamaru agrees.  “When was the last time we did this?”

“Well, it’s not like we haven’t been busy!”

“Don’t I know it,” Chōji groans.

The three of them collectively exhale in exhaustion.

“I’ve been working non-stop with my dad on reconstruction missions,” Chōji complains as soon as their rather lengthy order is given to the waitress. “The whole clan keeps being farmed out to other villages that were damaged by the Zetsu army. Every day, just because I can ford rivers and build bridges and fix dams – it’s never ending! This is the first real meal I’ve had in a month!”

“I think you’re exaggerating – you were at my place just last week,” Shikamaru interrupts.

“Well it feels like a month! I’m practically living on soldier pills!”

“Well at least those keep your health up,” Ino bemoans. “I should probably start taking those myself…”

“You sell flowers,” Chōji points out.

“Yeah, and it’s more tiring than you’d think!” Ino snaps. “Do you realise how many people come in for flowers every day? Everyone’s lost someone, so everyone wants to bring flowers or send them or make displays. And always with the messages of sympathy and condolences, and half of them are crying when they get me to fill those notes out and…ugh, it’s just depressing.”

Her shoulders sag. Shikamaru blinks, having not considered the emotional toll of her family business in the wake of the war.

“And it’s not like I can ask Mother to do anything,” she continues with a sigh.

“How is she?” Chōji asks softly.

“She has good days and bad days. I know it’s been a few months, but she’s still in shock,” she explains sadly. “Which means I have to handle all the clan business, because my uncles and cousins are morons. And on top of that I’m picking up Sakura’s slack because every week she’s off playing nursemaid to Sasuke.” Ino crosses her arms and glowers. “Grr, it’s playing dirty, is what it is! All because she has ultra high clearance – as if that would impress Sasuke! I could totally have that clearance if I wanted to. My dad ran the place!”

Shikamaru and Chōji face fault.

“You have seriously messed up priorities,” Shikamaru informs her.

“Excuse me?” Ino demands. She holds up a hand, and begins ticking off fingers. “Grieving villagers, helping my mother, my clan being idiots and Sasuke. I think I’m prioritizing things very well, thanks!”

“I guess she has a point,” Chōji sniggers. “When we were twelve, Sasuke would have been at the top of the list.”

“Oh, yeah, she’s totally grown,” Shikamaru snorts.

“Are either of you looking to spend quality time stuck in the body of a frog?” Ino asks sweetly. “Because I can make it happen.”

“If it means not eating soldier pills anymore, I’m in,” Choji decides, glancing around impatiently. “What’s taking so long? You’d think with so few people in here they could make it snappy!”

“I guess it’s one of the reasons this place is going out of business,” Shikamaru shrugs.

“What?” Ino demands. “Why?”

Chōji has gone pale and looks like he’s incapable of speech.

“According to the zoning records I read earlier, they’re opening another restaurant here instead. Something about a hamburger joint.”

“A what?!” Choji hisses, expression turning dangerous.

“Oh, yeah, there are some of those in the new part of town,” Ino remarks mildly. “Apparently they’re really popular out west – ahhh! Chōji, what the hell are you doing?!”

The scion of the Akimichi clan has jumped to his feet and actually flipped the table. The few guests in the restaurant cry out in alarm – Mirai, now once more in her mother’s lap, laughs and claps her hands in amusement.

Oh, yeah, she’s definitely Asuma’s…

“This – must – not – stand!” Chōji yells, breathing coming out in the usual huffs and puffs that preview his using an expansion jutsu. “Come on, Shikamaru! Ino! We need to have a chat with the managers! We cannot let the sacred sustenance that is barbecue be sullied by something as…as barbaric as hamburger! Think of the legacy we’re supposed to leave our future children!”

And he stomps toward the kitchen.

“Way to keep your mouth shut, moron,” Ino tells Shikamaru dryly.

He sighs.

“We should go stop him from demolishing the place…what a drag…”

つづく

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