#the roast is real

[ne-cocoa]

Monkey + bull = ???

Just a lil silly thing :3

[accirax]

💙❤️Blind Date or Die Episode 4, Starring Whit, Eloise, Arturo, Diana, Min, Eva, Veronika, and Jean💙❤️

[gale-force-storm]

I feel like most of the Wyll x Gale/Bladeweave content I see focuses on "Look at these two charming gentlemen! Lovely fancy lads <3" and like yes, totally, but also. Also.

These two would be such a sassy, bitchy, passive-aggressive couple

Gale "I won't take this lying down. That seems more your style" Dekarios and Wyll "I was wrong about you. You aren't actually insufferably randy. You're just insufferable" Ravenguard?

Gale "I'd wish you a bright future, but as you cannot escape your own company that would be a futile gesture" Dekarios and Wyll "I used to think first love was unsurpassable but you're much more tolerable now that you've found your second" Ravenguard?

These two would go to a ball, take a few turns around the dancefloor, have a lovely evening, and then spend the entire trip home living their best Statler and Waldorf lives just roasting everyone who annoyed them

And gods help you if you manage to genuinely piss off both of them. Forget swords and spells, they'd eviscerate you with their words alone

They may not be as openly catty as Astarion, but their gentlemanly demeanor just means when they roast someone they do it ~eloquently~, and I for one love that for them

[polterwasteist]

𝕾𝖕𝖔𝖔𝖐𝖞 𝕾𝖒𝖔𝖘𝖍 𝕯𝖆𝖉𝖘

(for spooky season)

or Demon!Anthony seducing scaring Pastor!Ian if u want some context

Reference by akql0422

[andreainlove]

my spotify is the musical version of a nervous breakdown btw if you even care

[matteoberrettini]

i love this video so much 😭😭

[pichirobi]

*passes everyone a "hard to swallow" pill bottle* i understand that dan and phil are highkey delighted by rpf fan content, but they have also expressed discomfort with conspiracy theories, speculation, and when fans have convinced themselves of a fake reality only to be disappointed when their headcanons don't come true.

not every joke about gay sex should be taken as a fact of their sex life. not every reference to the concept of marriage should be more ground for you to stand on at phwedding hill. not every improvised response to a tour pre-show question should be hyper-analyzed to have greater meaning about their affection for each other. dan and phil choose to not label themselves as boyfriends; we should not, with complete seriousness, convince ourselves that they are boyfriends.

we should not anticipate a "hard launch"—truthfully i hope they never ever make public the details of their relationship. they have already given us the knowledge that they are real best friends, companions through life, actual soulmates. and as a long-term phannie, this knowledge is more than we deserve!

continue making this community fun with ship art and gifs of heart eyes howell and fic events, but remember that we are now in a position to do so freely because of the boundaries dan and phil have set in place. we know that dan developed an ounce of bitterness towards intensive shippers who invaded their privacy and distorted reality. let's avoid another "that week in march" craze when we engage with the crumbs they feed us roombas. let's make sure we don't take their forgiveness for granted!

[starleska]

been watching a bunch of different YouTubers play through Finding Frankie, and i swear to god nothing's made me laugh harder than Mikeeey's reaction to Henry Hotline 😂😂

[lulublack90]

Prompt 7 - Sunday

Wolfstar, January 7, word count 418

Previous part First part

The end of Remus’s shift was coming up, and he couldn’t wait to get out of there. The last few minutes seemed to be dragging. He wanted to get home and see Sirius. He didn’t even question that Sirius would be there or that it seemed so normal. They didn’t even know each other, but he trusted him fully, and that was something of a miracle in itself for Remus as he trusted almost no one.

Finally, his shift was over. He grabbed his things and ran out before anyone could ask him to do anything else. He was barely off the property when his phone started ringing. He winced as he took it out of his pocket, but relaxed when he saw it was from his other job, the one he’d met Sirius through. 

“Hey, Remus, are you free this Sunday for an event?” Harold the big boss asked.

“Yes,” Remus said automatically. Harold paid far too well for him to turn down anything he threw his way.

“Excellent, I’ll send you all the details. Karl will be in charge of this one,” Remus groaned. Karl was the worst. It was only by sheer luck and the professionalism of the rest of the staff that everything went as planned when he was the manager. 

“Great, thanks Harold,” Remus said through gritted teeth and hung up. 

He was in a bit of a bad mood for the rest of his walk home. All that changed once he opened his front door and smelled the unmistakable smell of a roast dinner. 

“Sirius?” He called inside as he put his shoes and coat away. 

“Hi,” Sirius answered from the kitchen. Remus made his way there and stared wide-eyed at all the food Sirius had cooked for him. “Sorry, it’s the only thing I know how to cook, so we’re having roast chicken, roast potatoes, honey roast carrots, and erm, oh, peas.” Remus strode across the small space and kissed him. 

He pulled away quickly, apologising. They hadn’t done that properly yet, but Sirius had looked so adorable in his kitchen and had done such a sweet thing for him. Remus didn’t think anyone had cooked him anything since his mum died and that was years ago. 

Sirius grabbed the front of his t-shirt and pulled him back to him. He reached up, found Remus’s mouth with his and continued the kiss Remus had started. Remus relaxed into the kiss, and oh, if it wasn't the best kiss he’d ever had.

Next part

[etirabys]

I don't have a near-age sibling but some social feedback seems ideally delivered via indelicate roasting by a near-age sibling when you are in your teens. It feels easier to take "you don't shower and that's why no one likes you" from a sibling than parent or friend. Easier to deliver as a sibling, too

your parent gently saying "you should shower more" – ignore it. what do they know about the realities of your existence...

your friend says it (also nicely) – mortifying and weird, much likelier you'll take it to heart but you'll visibly feel terrible about it for a long time, which they didn't want, and now they're even more reluctant to say things to you (or anyone really)

it doesn't get fixed so your future first partner has to say it – god. might as well die

your annoying sibling – "fuck off" + slink off to shower a few hours later

[vaguely-concerned]

rook x lucanis: romance with a commentary track! solas and spite contribute with their thoughts and opinions along the way whether anyone wants them to or not. it's like a MST3K episode up in here as you try to get hot and heavy. in. in the pantry. love among the radishes at the end of the world (rifftrax version)

[vxmpirehunterd]

{Ya know, I've been thinking a lot about how even though D lives in a post-apocalyptic world and is constantly traveling; He's always drawn to be dressed so flamboyantly. Like the man has a bejeweled hat on, earrings, these colorful print scarves with a long ass cloak/coat. Sometimes he wears rings, and is even depicted wearing lipstick. Oh and lets not forget to mention his sword hilt is very decorative in design. Like even though he fights for humanity's survival--he still has his rich boy vampire swag on.}

[guess-i-do-art]

Draw Izzy Hands :3

✨💅sChMoL💅✨

Before you say anything like “ohhh stede should have been Ed or Lucius” yes that occurred to me, but Stede is the king of passive aggression plus I really wanted to draw him in his cursed red suit 🫶

[corpusdiem-seizethedead]

Husk: How was your day?

Angel: Good.

Husk: Really?

Angel: Don't make me lie twice.

[trentarnolds]

Jurgen Klopp + LFC 08.10.2015 - 19.05.24? The time I spent with you was a miracle in my life

[magnusbae]

"I'm.. better at hiding it" screaming, gagging, collapsing— Obi-Wan is this a joke to you— is tHIS A JOKE—?! Anakin looks fully baffled too, not believing Obi-Wan and thinking he's joking but also for a moment there he seems like he's about to ask him, are you serious? And frankly. Isn't it the entire conflict of those two? I'm better at hiding it. If only you weren't so good at this Obi-Wan, perhaps you wouldn't earn that infinite sadness you had predicted for yourself. i'll perish now.