#the pressure is finally high enough
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Procrastinating my actual work by trying to formulate that stupid german summary. Every word hurts. Physically.
#Making us write this shit in german is an act of cruelty#'oh yeah air traffic controllers :) what are they called? oh.#i refuse to use the word Fluglotse. also Luftfahrtverkehrskontrollkommunikation#is probably not the word I'm looking for#please#i don't know how german works#it sounds so very wrong to me#(i need to. continue working on my actual thesis. otherwise this will crash and burn just like those planes in tenerife 1977#i hate it so much but oh well#we gotta keep going#the pressure is finally high enough#my corona symptoms are nothing#i can work for 79 hours straight#i can finish this bitch of a thesis in time#and then I'll never think about it ever again#academic misery
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i fucking hate this stupid decrepit lab so much
#personal#rant#the road to my lab flooded again so i couldnt go in this weekend and get my new compound out of its solvent so it degraded to a known one#i was working to isolate more new compounds but the centrifugal evaporator has been broken for months and didnt dry my tubes#so i tried drying them with a rotary evaporator but the pump on the first one couldnt get pressure low enough#so i moved them to another rotary evaporator that broke and pissed 200ml of coolant into my precious sample#so now the samples will take days to dry and are probably heavily contaminated#how the fuck are we meant to publish high quality reports when every fucking machine is broken#this lab has finally reduced me to tears#its been 6 months since we had a serious near miss and the affected machines still havent been fixed to prevent it happening again#so im not feeling confident about anything getting done despite everything being broken
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am finally back home and can say without a doubt that i am just fundamentally not built for long distance travel however the train was much nicer than planes
#that being said. pressurized cabins drive me insane a little bit#and also it gives you pretty intense sea legs for a While#like. the ones from the first trip hadnt gone away by the return one. so. might be stuck with that for a few days#we shall see#also ajr live fucks severely#the albums were already incredible but that was a goddamn religious experience#like. idk the way i think abt it is theyre more djs than a regular band esp w their performance showing the making of way less sad#like their music is very electronicâ theyre making mixes of their own sound effects more than singing in one go#so like. the vocals were a teeensy bit rough at times#notably times it has taken me Literally Hundreds Of Hours Practice to be able to consistently sing along with#and times ive found its literally physically impossible to like. no matter what#idc how big your lungs areâ there is no human on earth who can do that final run of karma in one breath#much less to An Entire Stadium After An Hour Of Jumping And Dancing And Singing Loud As Fuck#so like i dont blame them for thatâ you dont go to live shows expecting it to be 100% perfect anyways jwbdjsbfksb#the trumpet however. well she was certainly playing sometimes. and was very enthusiastic about her flares.#however. in most of their songs they use midi trumpets to my ear at least#meaning she was likely an addition specifically for live performances and in my personal band kid opinion#prooobably was not in any of the like. higher tier bands? idk just. a lot of the mistakes she was making were hitting as stuff that got#taught out of us the instant we joined any band beyond regular concert#so i would guess she was probably just like. a friend who happened to play trumpet in high school or maybe even just middle school#and they knew that the trumpet parts in their pieces were big and distinct enough that like they /had/ to get a live player#and just kinda. didnt anticipate the audition -> performance gap#like. her tone was really fried the whole time like she was playing as hard as possible#which. she was mic'd. have the sound guy turn her up.#the way they did it made it sound like she was using a mute but not. like she only got the bad parts of a mute from it yknow#her tempo and timing were. bad. theres no nice way to put that one it just Was Badâ like the trumpet runs in ajr songs arent. complicated#like. quite literally if you handed me the sheet music right now i would have it down perfect in a week at absolute most#and better than that player on sightread. like. we did so many sightreading drills.#like ill share my band kid creds if anyone cares but i need to emphasize this isnt me being braggy like. they genuinely just arent hard#fuck im out of tags. w/e i think only like one of yall also listens to them anyways so i can leave it there
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Getting through the week for new Solo Leveling episodes â
Getting through the week to get out of this hell place â
#yeah it's pretty obvious of what hell place that is#i was impassive throughout the weekdays actually unless i finally get home#i really can't stand most of the people here and i just taught myself to just don't give a crap#in just a few months i will no longer be seeing their faces! i've had enough of this damn pressure and hearing them in their high horses#the more they got praised the more their egos are fed#i justâ urgh đ
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blood pressure
#my blood pressure finally got sustainedly high enough for my gp to prescribe medication which feels like cheating#i know why its high! its because i dont exercise. and the birth control probably doesnt help but its less trouble than a hysterectomy#i knew this 4 years ago when i was told to start exercising and i did actually keep that up for a few months before i couldnt be bothered#exercising is boring and makes me sweat... why would i do it when i could be doing something i like instead. alas#i need immediate gratification or i lose motivation. maybe i should get a ring fit. but first i need a tv screen to hook up the switch. alas#can you hook up a switch to a computer monitor. i have one of those. ok you can but this is irrelevant bc its still hypotheticals
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#I hate my body#Not because of the normal reasons of like... being fat and having a uterus or anything like that#I hate that it fails so so so often#I hate that my doctor wants me to give up fruit because my body just has too high triglycerides and can't convert them properly#I hate that my body makes too much cholesterol#I hate that my thyroid doesn't produce the right hormones#I hate that my brain wants to self destruct all the time#I hate that I've had to cut out basically all of the salt from my diet because my body can't regulate my blood pressure#I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it#I hate that I have to take so many goddamn pills all the time#I hate how expensive it is to maintain#I hate that I finally want to live and my body is actively trying to kill me#I hate the my wrists give out#I hate that I'm losing my hearing#I hate that there's a god awful ringing ringing ringing in my ears that I will never be able to escape#I hate that no matter what I do it's just never fucking *enough*#I hate that I'm only 30 and now I'm not supposed to eat bananas or pineapples or watermelon or passionfruit or enjoy alcohol#what else can I whittle away from my life?#AND THERE'S NO ACTUAL MEDICAL PROOF THAT THIS WILL WORK#anyways I'm going to see my brother next weekend#and we're gonna go hiking#I'm just... fucking done#'you're going to have a heart attack if you don't fix this'#you know I carved the word inadequate into my skin when I was 18#the T is still there the rest of it has faded with time#.... yeah#odt#vent#My body will always be inadequate#an inhospitable wasteland that I am trying so so hard to cultivate in
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What's the weirdest dream/nightmare you've had?
Pukicho story time???
This happened in 2004, I lived in Ireland. I had one very particular dream that I still often think about to this day:
It started in an unusual flat, somewhere up high. It was modern for the time, it felt decidedly Y2K. Every piece of furniture, the walls, the lamps, they were all bright pink. It was so trendy that it almost felt like a parody of itself, but I was a kid, and my mind wasn't clever enough for the act of parody. I would've simply forgotten this flat ever existed if the latter-half of the dream didn't leave such a permanent mark on my memory - now I can recall every last detail.
I asked a stranger to use the restroom. The toilet was downstairs, so I opened up the door to a utility stairwell and began heading down, alone.
I could look through the center of the staircase column, it was pitch-black and there was no visible bottom. I remember going down the staircase for hours, literal hours - A dark, oppressive hum from pipes and vents blinded my ears and shook the inside of my stomach with its volume. I remember thinking how long the dream felt in this moment, I recall getting consciously impatient, but I kept going. My eyes couldn't adjust to the nearly invisible-darkness surrounding me so I put my hand against the walls and handrail for guidance and shuffled downward like a blind man without his walking-stick.
Finally, only a moment before the tension would have juddered me awake, I found the door to the bathroom. I opened it up; to my relief there was light. The room was rectangular, on one end was a boxed-shaped shower with fogged glass, on the other end, a toilet. The floor and wall were decorated by the same beige tile - it all looked hastily plastered. I sat down to do my business. At this moment, the ballooning anxiety I had felt outside had dissipated almost entirely. I sat in silence - I remember acknowledging the sheer contrast in volume between the AC-hum in the bathroom to the oppressive roar from the stairwell.
It was good to be sitting there. I remember feeling as though the dream had slowly turned into a nightmare - but consciously, everything felt right again. Nothing happened for a long time. It grew so boring and tame that my mind stopped focusing on the dream entirely, and I began fading into memoryless sleep. And then the lights went out.
At this point, sitting in a darkness even blacker than the one I had just emerged from, not even a hum could be heard. The only noise I could hear, and just barely, was my own brain-matter hitting against the sides of my ears, bellowing a deep subharmonic hum from within my own skull. Suddenly, every semblance of safety was ripped from my chest, and I sat there, feeling in greater danger than I ever had before. I felt a pressure so omniscient that it choked me -- but nothing came, nothing happened. I waited for minutes - minutes where each second could be counted down in scrutinizing specificity, but nothing happened.
Suddenly, and with no presumption, I felt coarse electricity pumping through my chest. I wrangled with myself in my own bed, feeling what felt like infinite pain pass through me. I could feel myself yelling from within the dream through the vibration of my lungs. A cacophonous buzzing bled into my ears as thousands of people screamed from within my skull. The cries of a falling choir ran-through their screams, like angels falling from heaven.
At the very same moment, a body appeared in the shower. It glowed yellow, so bright and irradiated I could hardly look directly at it. It caressed itself, clawing into its body like it was reeling from immeasurable pain. It moved unnaturally, squirming and spasming as if fast-forwarded. The glass blurred its details, but it did nothing to mask its energy. It was as if it held the sun inside of its own stomach. I felt as though an intruder entered my own mind and I had no power to stop it. Just being near it was enough to kill me, and I was already dying.
The wall of sound lasted not even one full-second - and then - a piercing zap shot me up from my bed, and that was it. I can't remember anything past that point, but I assume I went back to bed shortly thereafter, forgetting what had just happened, if only for that one night. I must have had a vapid dream, worthless and memoryless, unknowing that I had just lived a dream so dreadful that it'd stick to my psyche like tar for the rest of my life.
No other dream has ever felt that way since. It was as if a second-soul decided to visit me, a soul stronger and more omnipotent than mine. Surely a dream is just a dream, regardless of the feeling it gives you, but now I go to bed every night, wishing I'll be the only soul residing within its story.
End!!
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TANGLED DESIRES- p.sh
PAIRING: enemy!sunghoon x f!reader
SYNOPSIS: At a prestigious private school, you and Park Sunghoon are locked in a constant rivalry. During a party at your friend Karinaâs, a heated argument between you two escalates into an unexpected, passionate encounter. The next morning, you wake up in his arms, forcing both of you to confront the new, complicated tension between you. As you navigate the fallout and shifting feelings, you start to question if your biggest enemy might actually be something much more.
GENRE: enemies to lovers, rich kids au
WARNINGS: smut (unprotected sex, oral sex) rivalry, hurt feelings, angst. ALL ARE OF AGE
wc: 15.4k
You attend the most prestigious school in Korea, where the sky-high tuition fees are only accessible to those born into pure wealth. This elite institution is a playground for the richest families, and your name is synonymous with success. Your family, being the owners of one of Koreaâs top corporations, you seem to have everything at your fingertipsâa glamorous life of luxury, an enviable social circle, and endless opportunities.
To the outside world, youâre the quintessential rich girl: impeccably stylish, effortlessly popular, and seemingly flawless. Yet beneath this polished veneer lies a different reality. Despite your privileged upbringing, youâre kind-hearted, fiercely intelligent, and deeply dedicated to everything you do. Your friend group, including Jake, Jay, Heeseung, Sunoo, Niki, Jungwon, Yuna, and Karina, forms a close-knit circle that navigates the pressures of their world together.
But thereâs always been one glaring exception: Park Sunghoon. The feud between the two of you is infamous, an unspoken tension that pulses beneath the surface of your otherwise harmonious friendships. No one really knows how it started, and no one seems to care enough to unravel it. Instead, everyone just tolerates your constant bickering.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âďż˝ďż˝ďż˝Ë â
The lunch table is alive with conversation, the usual chatter amplified by the excitement of the latest gossip. Karina sits comfortably beside Heeseung, leaning into him with an easy confidence that only she can pull off. Sheâs in the middle of talking about her parentsâ latest ventureâsomething about opening another resort somewhere exoticâwhen she casually drops the bomb.
âSo, theyâre gone for the whole weekend,â she says, her voice loud enough to catch everyoneâs attention. âAnd you know what that meansâŚâ
Jake perks up immediately, his eyes bright. âParty?â
Karina grins. âObviously. Saturday night, my place. No theme this time, just show up and bring your best energy.â
Yuna claps her hands in excitement. âFinally! Itâs been forever since the last one. I was starting to forget what a real party looks like.â
Jay laughs. âAs if youâd ever forget. You practically live for these things.â
Yuna sticks her tongue out at him, but her smile doesnât waver. âGuilty as charged.â
Heeseung wraps an arm around Karinaâs shoulders, looking amused. âYouâre not worried about your parents finding out?â
She rolls her eyes. âPlease, they wonât even notice. And even if they do, whatâs the worst that could happen? Theyâll just buy me something to make up for being gone.â
âMust be nice,â Niki mutters, leaning back in his chair.
Sunoo nudges him with a grin. âOh, come on, donât act like youâre not excited. You were the first one to ask about the music last time.â
Niki shrugs, but he canât hide his smile. âYeah, well, only if itâs not Sunghoonâs terrible playlist again.â
You glance across the table, catching Sunghoonâs eye. Heâs lounging back in his chair, looking entirely too pleased with himself. âMy playlist was fine, thank you very much,â he retorts. âItâs not my fault you have no taste.â
You snort. âPlease, Sunghoon, your taste in music is as bad as your taste in everything else.â
He looks over at you, eyebrow raised. âAnd whatâs that supposed to mean?â
You shrug, feigning innocence. âNothing, just that your definition of âgoodâ is highly questionable.â
He chuckles, the sound low and irritatingly smug. âComing from you, Iâll take that as a compliment.â
Karina cuts in, sensing the rising tension. âAlright, letâs not turn this into another one of your little spats. Save it for the party, okay?â
Sunghoon smirks, still looking at you. âLooking forward to it already.â
You roll your eyes but canât resist shooting back, âDonât get too excited, I might just ignore you all night.â
âOh, the horror,â he replies, his voice dripping with mock terror. âHow will I ever survive?â
Jay laughs, nudging Jake. âYou know, one day they might actually get along.â
Jake shakes his head, grinning. âNah, whereâs the fun in that?â
Karina steers the conversation back to the party details, running through a list of essentials while Heeseung nods along, offering suggestions. âInvite whoever you want,â she says, âoh except luci, last time I caught her giving mark head in my parents bedroom, I havenât been able to go in there since.â
You laugh and nod in agreement, trying not to notice how Sunghoon is still watching you, his expression unreadable. For a moment, you wonder whatâs going through his head, but then you push the thought away. Whatever it is, itâs probably nothing you need to worry about.
Karina claps her hands, bringing the attention back to her. âSo, everyoneâs in?â
Thereâs a chorus of agreement, and the table erupts into a mix of laughter and excited chatter as plans start to form. You glance over at Sunghoon one more time, catching his eye for a brief second before looking away. This party is already shaping up to be interesting⌠and you have a feeling thatâs an understatement.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
The lunch buzz still lingers in your ears as the group makes its way back across the pristine campus grounds. The sunlight reflects off the sleek, modern architecture of the schoolâs main building, and you canât help but admire the way everything here seems to sparkleâlike even the bricks and mortar are aware of the school's prestige.
You find yourself walking beside Karina, whoâs still chatting excitedly about the party, while Heeseung stays close, throwing in a comment or two. Yuna and Sunoo are a few steps ahead, their heads bent together as they giggle over something on Sunooâs phone. You catch Jake and Jay trailing behind, still debating something about sports cars or the best summer destinations.
Just as youâre about to reach the entrance, you feel a presence beside you. You donât need to turn your head to know who it is; Sunghoon always manages to sidle up to you when you least expect it.
âWhat, are you following me now?â you ask, not breaking your stride.
He chuckles. âOh, please. Donât flatter yourself. It just so happens our lockers are in the same direction.â
âRight,â you drawl, rolling your eyes. âLike you donât go out of your way to annoy me.â
He glances at you, smirk still firmly in place. âMaybe I just like seeing you get all riled up. Itâs entertaining.â
You shoot him a glare, but before you can fire back a retort, the group reaches the main hallway. The chatter from the student body fills the air, a mix of excitement and post-lunch drowsiness. The smell of expensive cologne and designer perfumes lingers in the air, an unmistakable signature of the schoolâs elite.
Karina stops at her locker, Heeseung leaning against it with a casual arm draped over her shoulder. She turns to you, her voice dropping conspiratorially. âSo, youâre coming early on Saturday, right? I need a hand setting things up.â
You nod, grateful for the distraction from Sunghoon. âOf course. Iâll be there.â
âGreat!â She beams. âAnd maybe you can help me make sure everything stays under control. You know how things can get with this crowd.â
Heeseung laughs softly. âGood luck with that. I donât think anyoneâs ever managed to keep Sunoo and Niki under control for more than five minutes.â
As if on cue, Sunoo pops up beside you with a grin. âI heard that, Heeseung! Iâm an angel, thank you very much.â
Niki appears at his side, raising an eyebrow. âAn angel of chaos, maybe.â
The group laughs, and you feel the tension in your shoulders ease. Itâs moments like these that make all the bickering and drama feel worth it.
But then, just as youâre about to make another comment, Sunghoonâs voice cuts through the noise. âSo, Y/N,â he says casually, âwhat are you going to wear to the party? Let me guess⌠something that screams âtrying too hardâ?â
You whip your head around, narrowing your eyes at him. âAnd what are you planning on wearing, Sunghoon? Something that screams âI own everything but a personalityâ?â
Thereâs a collective gasp from your friends, followed by a chorus of laughter. Sunghoon raises his eyebrows, feigning a look of hurt. âOuch, that one actually stung a little. Didnât know you had it in you.â
You cross your arms, feeling a triumphant smile tug at your lips. âIâve got plenty more where that came from. Try me.â
He leans in slightly, lowering his voice just enough that only you can hear. âMaybe I will,â he says, his eyes flicking over you in a way that makes your pulse quicken. âBut youâre going to have to do better than that if you want to get under my skin.â
Youâre about to retort when a voice interrupts. âCan we get through one day without you two turning everything into a competition?â Jay sighs, looking exasperated. âSeriously, itâs exhausting just watching you.â
Jake nods in agreement, though heâs grinning. âYou guys need to find a new hobby. Preferably one that doesnât involve verbal sparring in the middle of the hallway.â
You shrug, unable to resist the urge to keep poking at Sunghoon. âIâm open to suggestions, but I doubt Sunghoon has any better ideas.â
Sunghoon leans back, crossing his arms with a playful smile. âOh, Iâve got plenty of ideas. But I think youâd be too scared to try them.â
Before you can respond, the bell rings, signaling the end of lunch. Karina groans. âUgh, saved by the bell. I guess weâll have to pick this up later.â
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
As everyone starts to disperse to their respective classes, Sunghoon gives you one last look, a challenge in his eyes. âDonât worry, Y/N,â he says smoothly. âIâll be looking forward to it.â
You roll your eyes, but your heart is beating just a little faster. You canât help but wonder what exactly heâs planning⌠and why a part of you is actually looking forward to finding out.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
The day of the party arrives with a crisp, clear sky and a hint of excitement that seems to permeate every corner of the city. You wake up early, feeling a mix of anticipation and nervous energy. Karina had texted you the night before, reminding you to come over in the afternoon to help set up for the party. You agreed eagerly, knowing that any opportunity to help would give you something to focus on and take your mind off the strange tension building between you and Sunghoon.
When you arrive at Karinaâs mansion, the house is buzzing with activity. Karinaâs housekeeper greets you at the door with a warm smile, directing you to the large, open-plan living area where Karina is already busy coordinating the decorations with a small army of helpers. The space is being transformed into a glamorous party venue with twinkling lights, elegant table settings, and a dance floor that looks like itâs straight out of a high-end club.
Karina spots you as soon as you walk in, her face lighting up with relief and excitement. âY/N! Perfect timing. Iâm so glad youâre here. We could use an extra pair of hands.â
You smile, rolling up your sleeves. âWhat can I do to help?â
Karina hands you a stack of neatly folded napkins and points towards a table covered with party favors. âStart by setting these up on the tables. I want everything to look perfect tonight.â
You get to work, organizing napkins and arranging snack trays, chatting with Karina about the last-minute details. The hours fly by as you work alongside her, the room gradually coming together into a setting that is unmistakably Karinaâs styleâclassy, sophisticated, and just a bit over the top.
As the afternoon drifts into evening, Karina claps her hands and gathers you for a brief break. âAlright, itâs time for a quick change. Youâve been working so hard, and I want you to look as fabulous as the rest of the evening.â
You raise an eyebrow, half-teasing. âWhatâs wrong with what Iâm wearing?â
Karina waves her hand dismissively. âyou donât want me to answer that. cmon youâre hot, why not show off a little?â
Before you can protest, Karina ushers you into her bedroom and pulls out a sleek, little black dress from her closet. The dress is short and simple with a cut that accentuates your figure without being too revealing.
âPut this on,â Karina insists, handing you the dress. âTrust me, youâll look amazing. And donât worry about the hair and makeup; Iâve got that covered too.â
You change quickly, admiring the way the dress fits and the way it makes you feel more confident and glamorous. When you step out of the room, Karina is waiting with a professional-looking makeup kit and a few hair tools.
As she works on your hair and makeup, she chatters away, filling the room with her usual upbeat energy. âyou look sexyâ
You smile at her reflection in the mirror. âThanks, Karina. You donât think itâs a bit much? Itâs definitely more out there than I usually go forâ.
Karina beams, finishing up with a final touch of lipstick. âbabe thereâs no such thing as too much. And who knows, maybe youâll catch someone eye tonight,â she tells you with a wink.
With a laugh and a final look at yourself in the mirror, you feel a surge of excitement. The dress feels perfect, and the makeup and hair make you look polished and ready for the night. As you head back downstairs, you catch sight of Karinaâs smile of approval, and you canât help but feel a bit more confident about the evening ahead.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
The music starts pumping through the walls as you and Karina make your way back downstairs. The final touches have been set, and the room looks like a scene straight out of a teen movie: fairy lights strung up in every corner, a couple of disco balls catching the light just right, and a dance floor that practically begs people to let loose. Karina surveys everything with a grin that stretches from ear to ear.
âSee?â she says, nudging you with her elbow. âThis is why I always go all out.â
You chuckle, glancing around. âOkay, okay, you were right. This does look kind of amazing.â
The doorbell rings, and Karina practically bounces on her toes. âThat must be the first guests! Come on, we have to greet everyone in style.â
The two of you rush to the front door, and soon enough, your friends start streaming in. Sunoo is the first to arrive, with Niki and Jungwon right behind him. They all look ready to have the best night ever, and Sunoo immediately zeroes in on you, his eyes going wide.
âOh. My. God. Y/N!â Sunoo exclaims dramatically, clutching his chest. âLook at you in that little black dress! Who is she?!â
You roll your eyes, fighting back a grin. âAlright, Sunoo, calm down. Itâs just a dress.â
âItâs not just a dress,â Niki interjects with a grin. âItâs the dress. Who are you trying to impress tonight?â
Jungwon nudges Niki. âYeah, spill. Is there someone youâre hoping to catch the eye of?â
You smirk, crossing your arms. âOh, please, like Iâd tell you guys even if there was.â
More of your friends arrive, and soon the room is buzzing with chatter and laughter. Jake and Jay show up not long after, both of them effortlessly cool as always. Jay immediately gets to work DJ-ing from his phone, while Jake heads to the makeshift bar, already concocting a round of mixed drinks.
Then, just as you start to relax, you see himâPark Sunghoon. He steps in, looking annoyingly good in a casual black button-down and jeans. His eyes scan the room until they find you. For a split second, he looks almost surprised, but then his trademark smirk appears.
âWell, well,â Sunghoon says as he strolls over to you, hands casually shoved into his pockets. âLook who decided to play dress-up. You got a hot date tonight or something?â
You scoff, giving him a look. âOh, please, Sunghoon. Unlike you, I donât have to try so hard to impress everyone.â
Sunghoon chuckles, leaning in just slightly. âRight. Because you just show up looking like that for fun?â
Before you can shoot back a retort, Karina swoops in, looping her arm through yours. âHey, Sunghoon, quit being a troll. Y/N looks amazing, and you know it. Now go get a drink and try to be nice for once!â
He holds up his hands, his grin widening. âAlright, alright, Iâll behave... for now.â
You watch as he saunters off to join Jake at the bar, and Karina gives you a knowing look. âDonât let him get under your skin tonight, okay?â
You nod, trying to brush it off, even though youâre still buzzing from his teasing. âYeah, yeah, Iâm good.â
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
The party is in full swing nowâmusic thumping, people laughing, and the lights twinkling overhead like stars. You find yourself swept up in the fun, moving from one conversation to the next, the earlier tension with Sunghoon momentarily forgotten. Youâre by the snack table, popping a few chips into your mouth when Haechan sidles up next to you with his signature grin.
âHey, Y/N,â he says smoothly, leaning in a little closer than necessary. âLooking good tonight. That dress is seriously working for you.â
You smile at him, amused by his blatant flirting. âThanks, Haechan. Youâre not looking too bad yourself,â you reply, playing along. Heâs always been a harmless flirt, and you donât mind the attention tonight.
He grins wider, clearly pleased. âI try. But seriously, I canât believe Iâm just now noticing how stunning you are. Were you hiding this whole time or just waiting for the perfect moment to make your grand entrance?â
You laugh, shaking your head. âOh, you know me. Always dramatic,â you joke, and he chuckles, leaning in a bit more.
âYouâre full of surprises, Y/N. Makes me want to know you better,â he says, his voice dropping slightly, and you canât help but laugh at his over-the-top delivery.
What you donât notice is that from across the room, Sunghoon has been watching the entire interaction with a growing frown. Heâs leaning against a wall, a drink in hand, his eyes narrowing as he watches Haechan lean closer to you, flashing that charming smile. His jaw tightens, and his grip on the cup becomes visibly tighter.
Heeseung, whoâs been standing beside him, follows his line of sight and notices the tense look on his friendâs face. A knowing grin spreads across Heeseungâs lips as he leans over to Sunghoon, nudging him with his elbow.
âSomeone looks like theyâve got their feathers ruffled,â Heeseung teases, keeping his voice low so only Sunghoon can hear.
Sunghoon scoffs, rolling his eyes. âIâm fine.â
âSure,â Heeseung laughs. âThatâs why youâve been glaring at Haechan like youâre ready to knock that grin off his face.â
Sunghoon doesnât respond right away, but his eyes remain fixed on you and Haechan. Heeseung watches with amusement, clearly enjoying the show.
âJust admit it, man,â Heeseung continues, his tone light. âYouâre jealous.â
Sunghoon finally looks away from you, giving Heeseung a dismissive look. âIâm not jealous. I just donât like seeing him act like a fool.â
Heeseung snorts. âRight. Because youâre so worried about Haechan embarrassing himself.â He claps a hand on Sunghoonâs shoulder. âCome on, dude, just go talk to her. Or are you afraid sheâll turn you down?â
Sunghoon shoots him a glare. âShut up, Heeseung.â
Heeseung just laughs harder, clearly unbothered by Sunghoonâs mood. âAlright, whatever you say. But just so you know, glaring at Haechan isnât going to do anything except make you look more obvious.â
Sunghoon doesnât answer, but Heeseungâs words seem to hit a nerve. He turns his attention back to you, his expression unreadable, though thereâs still a flicker of something in his eyesâsomething more than just casual interest.
Meanwhile, youâre still chatting with Haechan, completely unaware of the little drama unfolding across the room. But you canât shake the feeling that someoneâs watching you, and when you finally glance up, your eyes meet Sunghoonâs for just a second. He quickly looks away, and you canât help but wonder what that was all about.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
The party continues to buzz around you, but after a while, the noise and energy start to feel a bit overwhelming. You decide you need a break, a moment to yourself away from the chaos. Without saying anything, you slip out of the crowded living room and head toward the balcony, where the air is cooler and the music is just a muffled hum in the background.
You push open the glass doors and step outside, letting the crisp night air hit your face. Itâs a welcome change from the warmth inside. You lean against the railing, taking a deep breath, trying to clear your mind. The stars are faint above the city lights, and you can hear distant sounds of traffic, a reminder of the world continuing outside this little bubble of a party.
You close your eyes for a moment, just enjoying the quiet. But then, you hear the soft sound of footsteps behind you. You turn, half-expecting to see Karina or maybe Sunoo, but your heart skips a beat when you see Sunghoon stepping out onto the balcony.
âWhat do you want, Sunghoon?â you sigh, not bothering to hide your annoyance.
âI could ask you the same thingâ he replies, his voice closer than you expected. You feel the warmth of his body behind you, jus inches away. âRunning away from the party?â
âHardly.â You glance over your shoulder at him. âJust needed a break from all the fakes and liars inside.â
His lips curl into that familiar, infuriating smirk. âAnd here I thought you thrived on that type of thing. Who knew Y/N had limits?â
You roll tour eyes, turning back to the view. âYeah, well, believe it or not I do. But you wouldnât know anything, would you?â
Sunghoon steps closer, his breath brushing against your ear, sending an unwanted shiver down your spine. You feel a rush of heat flood your cheeks and something else you refuse to acknowledge. âYou donât know anything about me, Sunghoon. And id keep it that way if I were you.â
He laughs, a deep, rich sound that makes your skin prickle. âI think you like it when I get under your skin. Why else do you always react like this?â You scoff, turning to face him, only then realizing how close he actually was. âMaybe iâm just tired of you acting like youâre gods gift to the world. newsflash: youâre not.â
His grin widens, and he takes another step closer, invading youâre space entirely as if he wasnât already to begin with. âAdmit it.â he says, his voice dropping lower. âYou like our little games. You like the way I push your buttons.â
Your heart is pounding now, and you hate that heâs right, that thereâs something about him that gets to you in a way no one else does.But you refuse to five him the satisfaction of knowing it. âIn your dreams,â you snap, though the breathlessness in your voice betrays you.
He reaches out, his fingers brushing your arm, and you feel a jolt of heat at the contact. âIs that so?â he whispers, his lips dangerously close to yours now, his eyes dark with challenge. âBecause I think youâre lying. I think you want this as much as I do.â
Your breath hitches, and for a moment, youâre frozen, caught in his gaze. The intensity in his eyes makes your pulse race, a mix of anger and undeniable attraction. Heâs so close now that you can feel his breath your lips, and before you can stop yourself, you grab his shirt, pulling him the last few inches towards you.
âMaybe I just want to shut you up,â you mutter, your voice barely above a whisper. âThen do it,â he taunts, his lips brushing against yours, almost but not quite a kiss. Itâs all the encouragement you need. You close the distance, your mouth crashing against his. His hands grip your waist, pulling you closer, and you press against him, fueled by a mix of anger and desire.
The kiss is intense, a battle of wills as much as it is anything else. His lips are firm, demanding, and you meet him with equal force, neither of you willing to give an inch. Your hands move up to his hair, tugging slightly and he groans against your mouth, deepening the kiss.
Youâre lost in it. Lost in him, every nerve in your body alight with sensation. His hands slide up your back, his touch sending sparks through you, and you hate how much you crave it, hate how much you want him despite everything.
Youâre breathless when you finally pull back, your heart hammering against your ribs. Sunghoonâs lips are parted, his breaths coming in ragged, and his eyes are dark with something dangerousâsomething you know you shouldnât be entertaining.
His hand is still on your waist, his thumb brushing the exposed skin just beneath the hem of your shirt, and you swear every nerve in your body is on fire. He leans in close, his lips grazing your ear, and his voice comes out in a low, almost pleading murmur. âCome back to my place.â
It isnât a question, but thereâs something in his tone that sends a shiver down your spine, a combination of hunger and desperation that mirrors whatâs coursing through your veins. For a moment, youâre temptedâso, so tempted to just say yes and give in to whatever this is. But logic fights its way to the surface, and you pull back just enough to meet his gaze.
âAre you serious?â you ask, your voice wavering more than youâd like.
His expression doesnât falter, his eyes locked onto yours. âDead serious.â He swallows, his grip on your waist tightening, as if heâs afraid youâll slip away. âI donât want this to end here.â
You hesitate, your mind racing. This is SunghoonâPark Sunghoonâthe guy youâve spent so long arguing with, glaring at across rooms, doing everything in your power to avoid. But thereâs something different about the way heâs looking at you now, something raw and real that makes it hard to think clearly.
âI donât know,â you say, trying to sound firm, though your resolve is crumbling by the second. âI mean⌠this is crazy.â
âMaybe,â he agrees, his voice still low, still laced with that edge of desperation. âBut I think you like crazy.â His lips curl into a half-smile, that familiar cockiness tempered with something else, something softer.
You bite your lip, weighing your options, feeling the tension between you bothâhot, magnetic, impossible to ignore. âThis is a bad idea,â you whisper, though even you can hear the lack of conviction in your words.
Sunghoon steps closer, closing the distance again, his forehead almost touching yours. âProbably the worst,â he says, his breath hot against your skin. âBut if you donât say yes, Iâm going to lose my mind.â
You can feel his heartbeat through his shirt, can feel how fast itâs racing, and you know he means it. Part of you is screaming to walk away, to leave now before you make a mistake, but thereâs another partâa louder, more reckless partâthatâs screaming for you to stay, to see where this goes.
âJust one night,â he murmurs, his lips brushing yours again, barely a kiss, just enough to make you shiver. âNo strings, no expectations. Just⌠us.â
You close your eyes, fighting against every instinct telling you to run. But when you open them again, his gaze is still locked onto yours, and you canât deny the heat pooling in your stomach, the way your skin tingles with every touch.
âFine,â you breathe, barely louder than a whisper. âOne night.â
His grin is immediate, but thereâs relief in it too, and he closes the distance, pressing his lips to yours again, this time harder, more insistent. âLetâs get out of here,â he says against your mouth, his hand sliding to intertwine with yours, and you know thereâs no going back now.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
You manage to sneak past your friends to leave Karinaâs mansion, the partygoers and scattered distractions making it all that more simple.
The drive is quiet, both of you caught in your own thoughts. The city passes by in a blur of neon signs and headlights, the streets quieter than they were earlier. You steal a glance at him, watching the way his jaw clenches, the way his fingers tap against the wheel like heâs counting down the seconds.
Sunghoon pulls up to his mansion, its sprawling, modern architecture framed by towering trees and high walls that ensure absolute privacy. The wide driveway curves up to the grand entrance, where soft lights cast a warm glow over the marble steps and tall double doors. You glance around, taking in the sheer size of the placeânot because it surprises you, but because youâve never been here before.
Your own familyâs estate is nothing to scoff at, but thereâs a distinct style to his homeâsomething sleek and almost understated, despite its size. You tilt your head slightly, noticing the details: the way the garden is meticulously maintained, the sharp lines of the building softened by the greenery that surrounds it. Itâs impressive, in a way thatâs different from what youâre used to.
He takes your hand to lead you inside, you follow him down the dimly lit corridor, decorated with family pictures and modern art that costs a fortune. He pauses at his bedroom door, his hand still holding yours, and turns to look at you one more time. âLast chance to change your mind,â he murmurs, though his thumb strokes the back of your hand, a comforting gesture.
You take a deep breath, then shake your head. âIâm not changing my mind.â
A small smile tugs at his lips. âGood,â he whispers, unlocking the door and pushing it open.
You step inside, and he follows, closing the door behind you. The space is dimly lit, warm, and thereâs an unexpected coziness to itâminimalistic but comfortable. The air feels thick with everything unspoken between you.
Sunghoon turns to you, his gaze intense, and he steps closer, his hand moving up to your face, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear. âIâve been thinking about this all night,â he admits quietly, his voice almost a growl.
Your breath catches, and you feel the heat rush to your face. âThen stop talking,â you murmur, your own voice breathless.
His lips are on yours in an instant, capturing your mouth in a kiss thatâs all-consuming, filled with all the tension, the want, the frustration thatâs been building for so long. You kiss him back just as fiercely, hands sliding up his chest, feeling his heartbeat pounding beneath your palms.
Sunghoon's hands roamed over your body, squeezing your tits. You let out a small involuntary moan, a grunt leaving him immediately after. His lips move down to your next, trailing up and down before reaching that sweet spot right behind your ear.
It all feels to fucking good, your panties sticking to your core. He moves to sit on the edge of his bed, pulling you into his lap before catching your lips once again. His growing hardness is poking at you. âYou look so fucking sexy in this little dress,â He tells you in a low tone that makes you clench around nothing, the ache between your legs growing. You start grinding on him, his hands grabbing your ass, encouraging you to keep grinding against his clothed length. âThatâs it baby, grind on me, keep rubbing that pretty pussy over my cock.â
Your head is thrown back, lip in between your teeth, his words encouraging your quickening movements. âNeed you so bad, Hoon,â you manage to get out.
âYeah baby? tell me what you need.â He tells you. Itâs almost embarrassing how much you wanted him. âNeed your cock.â Without another word you feel his hands back on your ass, lifting you up and throwing you down on his bed. He looks up at you with mischievious eyes, hovering over you as his hands roam down the sides of your thighs to them hem of your dress. âCan i take this off?â he asks, caressing the soft, exposed skin there.
Eagerly, you nod quickly, reaching for the hem to help him pull it up and over your head. Luckily you opted for a pair of black lacy panties and opposed to your more comfortable ones. He audibly sighs and your exposed figure, âYouâre so beautiful,â He tells you, his fingers working to slide your panties down your legs and tossing them to the side, revealing just how much you wanted him.
âShit baby youâre so wet.â He leans down, placing soft, wet kisses just below your navel, dangerously close to where you wanted him most. âHoon please,â you murmur out. He straightens out, unbuckling his belt to pull down his pants and boxers all in one go. While he wasnât remarkably long, he made up for it in girth. You lick your lips at the sight, anticipation and heat pooling.
He pumps himself a couple times before heâs lining himself up with your entrance. He takes his time, making sure to smear your slick between your clit and his length. You feel his tip parting your folds, your breath hitching in your throat. âYou ready?â his eyes meet yours for assurance. No words come out your mouth, all you do is nod.
He enters you carefully, a strong contrast from his words earlier in the night. The last thing he wants is to rush, just because of how unpatient and horny he is. You close your eyes, holding in the gasp that threatens to escape your lips. âRelax baby, I got you.â
âI know,â you breathe out. The sudden stretch has your eyes rolling to the back of your head. The burn quickly turning into a delicious one. âThatâs it,â he praises you continuing to slide in until heâs nestled completely between your walls. âYou take me so well,â he grunts, his length twitching inside of you.
âFuck me, Hoonâ you murmur, your walls clench around him, throwing his head back at the feeling. Before you know it heâs pulling out of you, only to smack his hips back against yours. It knocks all the oxygen out your lungs, leaving you breathless as he repeats the same action over and over again. âFuck,â you breathe out, focusing on how good he looks above you.
Youâre in a complete feeling of euphoria. Sunghoonâs skills topping those of the few guys youâve slept with before. In that moment, all the bickering and years of back and forth leave your mind completely. The only thing closing your mind is how good him of all people is making you feel.
âHoon⌠faster,â you let out, his hips snapping in a faster pace on command. Your back arches off the bed, hands grasping the sheets in small fists. He notices and reaches for them to thread his fingers through yours, pinning them above your head. âYou like that baby? love how good you feel⌠fuck youâre so tight. Gonna make you cum so hard.â
âIâm so c-close, fuck,â you breathe out. His thrusts become messier and you know heâs close. âCum on my cock pretty,â he grunts, hands letting go of yours to grip your hips. Clenching around him, it takes a few for pumps before youâre both coming undone. His cock twitching inside you as he fucks his cum into you.
He drops his sweaty forehead against your shoulder, quick, deep breaths meeting your skin and he comes down from his high. It takes you both a while before your breathing steadys. âYou good?,â he asks you, settling on the bed beside you. âmhm,â is all you say in response, unsure as to where this leaves your relationship. It all felt to good to ignore. âAre you good?â you ask him after a moment of silence. âBetter than I have in a long time.â
Youâre not sure when you fall asleep. The exhaustion taking over you all at once.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
The morning light filters softly through the heavy curtains, casting a gentle glow across the room. You wake to the sound of birds chirping outside, their songs a peaceful contrast to the intensity of the night before. The bed is warm, and youâre nestled comfortably under the covers, Sunghoonâs arm draped over you.
You shift slightly, the movement causing Sunghoon to stir beside you. He mumbles something incoherent, tightening his hold on you before settling back into a deeper sleep. You take a moment to just lie there, letting yourself absorb the strange, surreal comfort of the situation. Thereâs an odd serenity in the room, a calm that feels almost unreal given the whirlwind of emotions that led you here.
As you slowly become more aware, you gently untangle yourself from his embrace, careful not to wake him. You sit up and stretch, glancing around at the elegant room thatâs now your temporary sanctuary. The soft morning light highlights the sleek lines and modern decor, giving the space an almost ethereal quality.
You slide out of bed and make your way to the bathroom, feeling a little self-conscious but determined to gather yourself. You glance at yourself in the mirror, trying to process the whirlwind of the past night. The evidence of sleep lingers in your eyes, and you smooth your hair, mentally preparing yourself for whatever comes next.
When you return to the bedroom, Sunghoon is still asleep, his chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm. You take a moment to just watch him, the vulnerability in his expression softened by sleep. Thereâs a part of you that feels a pang of somethingâsoftness, maybe even affectionâthough youâre still trying to fully understand what it all means.
Deciding not to linger too long, you quietly gather your things and start to get dressed. Youâre pulling on your clothes when you hear a rustling behind you. You turn to find Sunghoon blinking awake, his gaze immediately locking on you with a sleepy, yet intense look.
âGood morning,â he murmurs, his voice rough with sleep.
You smile softly, trying to keep things light despite the previous night's intensity. âMorning. I didnât want to wake you.â
He stretches lazily, a smirk forming on his lips. âAnd here I was thinking youâd sneak out before I even woke up. Not very considerate of you, you know.â
You raise an eyebrow, crossing your arms. âOh, sorry. I didnât realize I was supposed to tiptoe around your mansion.â
He chuckles, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. âYeah, well, you should be lucky youâre not being kicked out for your unexpected visit.â
You roll your eyes, pulling on your shirt. âOh, please. Itâs not like I forced my way in. You made it pretty clear you wanted me here.â
His smirk widens. âTrue. And now Iâm faced with the charming aftermath of our little escapade. How do you intend to handle that?â
You shrug, trying to keep your tone casual. âI think we both know this doesnât exactly change things. We still donât like each other. This was⌠a one-off.â
Sunghoon raises an eyebrow, clearly amused. âA one-off? Thatâs what weâre calling it now? What happened to all that intense âhateâ from last night?â
You narrow your eyes at him, feeling a bit defensive. âItâs complicated. We both know that. Iâm just here to sort myself out.â
He stands up, stretching with a yawn. âWell, I suppose if youâre done with the morning-after drama, I should at least make you breakfast.â
You look at him skeptically. âBreakfast? Youâre really pulling out the stops now?â
He gives you a mockingly hurt look. âDonât sound so surprised. Even enemies deserve to be fed after a night like that.â
You smirk, shaking your head. âFine. Breakfast it is. But donât think this means Iâm sticking around for a whole lot of chit-chat.â
He grins, clearly pleased with your response. âWouldnât dream of it. Just a quick meal and then you can be on your way.â
As he leads you to the kitchen, you both fall into a familiar rhythm, trading barbs and jabs that feel almost comfortable in their own way. The awkwardness of the night before is still there, but itâs tempered by the humor and banter that defines your relationship.
In the kitchen, Sunghoon starts pulling out ingredients, his movements confident and efficient. You watch him, feeling a strange mix of irritation and appreciation. Despite everything, thereâs something almost endearing about the way heâs trying to play the gracious host.
âSo, whatâs the plan after breakfast?â you ask, grabbing a coffee cup and filling it. âAre we going to pretend like nothing happened, or do you have some other grand gesture in mind?â
He looks over at you with a smirk. âMaybe Iâll just enjoy the novelty of seeing you eat my food. Consider it a small victory.â
You roll your eyes, but thereâs a genuine smile on your lips. âEnjoy it while it lasts. Iâm not here for long.â
He chuckles, placing a plate of food in front of you. âDonât worry, I wonât be offended if you leave right after. Iâm sure weâll find new ways to annoy each other soon enough.â
You take a bite of the breakfast, shaking your head in mock exasperation. âIâll hold you to that.â
As you eat, the tension from the night before begins to ease, replaced by the familiar dynamic of your interactions. Itâs not exactly comfortable, but itâs familiarâa small reminder that despite everything, some things never really change.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
The bell rings, signaling the end of the period, you gather your things and stand up, eager to leave the classroom and escape the strange tension thatâs been hanging between you and Sunghoon all day. Youâre heading toward the door when you feel a light tap on your shoulder. You turn around to find Sunghoon standing close, a mischievous glint in his eyes.
âCan I help you?â you ask, trying to keep your tone neutral.
Sunghoon leans in, his face just inches from yours. His breath is warm against your ear, and you can feel his proximity even though you try to back away slightly. âYou look cute today,â he whispers, his voice low and deliberately teasing.
You freeze for a moment, your heart skipping a beat as his words sink in. Youâre taken aback by the unexpected comment, feeling a rush of irritation mixed with something you canât quite define. You quickly compose yourself, narrowing your eyes at him.
âSeriously?â you hiss, trying to keep your voice low so that no one else hears. âNow youâre trying to play nice? How pathetic.â
Sunghoon pulls back slightly, a smirk tugging at his lips. âIâm just making an observation,â he says innocently, though the amusement in his eyes betrays him.
You roll your eyes, your frustration evident. âYeah, well, save it for someone who actually cares. Iâm not in the mood for your games.â
As you turn and walk toward the door, you hear Sunghoonâs laughter behind you, light and mocking. You try to ignore the heat rising in your cheeks as you make your way out of the classroom, determined not to let him get under your skin. Despite your efforts to stay composed, his words linger in your mind, adding to the awkwardness and confusion of the day.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
Lunch at school is a lively affair, with the cafeteria buzzing with the chatter of students and the clatter of trays. You and your friendsâYuna, Karina, and the restâsettle into your usual spot at the table. Sunghoon and his group are seated across from you, and you can feel his gaze lingering on you, even as you try to focus on the conversation with your friends.
Karina is mid-sentence, animatedly discussing the latest school gossip when Sunghoon's voice cuts through. âOh, come on, Y/N. You can't actually believe that nonsense.â
You glance up, catching Sunghoonâs eyes. Heâs smirking, clearly enjoying the opportunity to poke at you. âAnd whatâs so ridiculous about it?â you retort, trying to keep your voice steady despite the irritation brewing inside you.
âSeriously?â Sunghoonâs grin widens. âItâs just a bunch of exaggerated stories. Youâve always had a knack for falling for that kind of thing.â
You roll your eyes, feeling a familiar annoyance bubbling up. âSays the guy whoâs always spouting off about how everythingâs ânot worth his time.ââ
Sunghoon leans back in his chair, folding his arms. âAt least I donât get caught up in every little bit of drama that comes my way.â
You scoff, crossing your arms. âIâm not the one who spends half his day looking for ways to pick fights. Maybe if you werenât so obsessed with making everything a competition, youâd see things more clearly.â
Yuna and Karina exchange glances, trying to stifle their laughter as the two of you go back and forth. Karina nudges you playfully. âLooks like you two are back to your old routine.â
You shoot her a sidelong glance, annoyed but unable to hide a small smile. âOh, you have no idea.â
Meanwhile, Sunghoonâs eyes are fixed on you, his smirk never fading. Every time you catch him looking, you feel a mix of frustration and unease. His gaze is unrelenting, and despite your best efforts to ignore it, you canât help but feel self-conscious.
âWhat are you staring at?â you snap, catching him in the act.
Sunghoon raises an eyebrow, his expression innocent. âJust observing. Is that a problem?â
You narrow your eyes, crossing your arms. âMaybe if you had something better to do than harass me, you wouldnât have to be so nosy.â
He chuckles, leaning forward with a teasing glint in his eyes. âMaybe I just enjoy watching you get all riled up. Itâs entertaining.â
You glare at him, feeling your irritation spike. âYeah, well, itâs not exactly a compliment.â
Sunghoon shrugs, still smirking. âSuit yourself.â
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
After lunch, you head to your next class with a sense of relief, hoping to escape the tension of the cafeteria. As you settle into your seat, the classroom buzzes with the usual pre-class chatter. You glance around, hoping to avoid any more interactions with Sunghoon, but heâs in the same class, sitting a few rows behind you.
The teacher arrives, and the room quiets down as the lesson begins. You try to focus on the lecture, but the lingering effects of the lunchtime bickering keep your thoughts scattered. Every now and then, you can feel Sunghoonâs eyes on you, though you avoid turning around to confirm it.
Halfway through the class, you feel a small piece of paper land softly on your desk. You glance down to find a note with neat handwriting:
*âCan we at least pretend to be civil? I promise Iâm not plotting your demise.â*
You roll your eyes, a small smile tugging at your lips despite yourself. You scribble a quick reply:
âWhy start now? Itâs more fun to keep you on your toes.â
You fold the note and toss it back over your shoulder, hoping it will reach him without drawing too much attention. A few moments later, you see Sunghoonâs hand reach forward to grab it, his expression unreadable.
The rest of the class proceeds in a blur of lectures and notes. The occasional glances you and Sunghoon exchange are filled with unspoken tension, but you both manage to keep your interactions to a minimum.
At the end of your lecture, you pack up your things and make your way out of the classroom. Youâre heading down the hall when you hear Sunghoonâs voice behind you.
âHey, wait up.â
You stop, turning to see him catching up with you. Heâs wearing a casual expression, though thereâs a hint of seriousness in his eyes.
âSeriously? What now?â you ask, trying to keep your tone even.
Sunghoonâs gaze lingers on you, and he seems to consider his next words carefully. âSo, I was thinking⌠why donât you come over to my place later?â
You raise an eyebrow, puzzled. âFor what? We already had our⌠whatever that was.â
Sunghoon gives you a knowing look, his smirk widening. âCome on, you know youâre curious. Besides, you know you want me.â
You feel a rush of heat at his words, and you try to maintain your composure. âAnd what happened to it being a one-night thing? Are you trying to make this a regular thing now?â
Sunghoonâs eyes twinkle with mischief. âMaybe I am. Or maybe I just want to spend more time with you. Either way, I think youâre interested.â
You hesitate, feeling the pull of his words. The desire that was ignited the night before is still burning strong, and you find yourself tempted despite your better judgment.
With a sigh, you give in, unable to resist the allure of what heâs offering. âAlright, fine. Iâll come over. But just to see what you have in mind.â Sunghoonâs smile broadens, clearly pleased with your decision. âGreat. see you later.â
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
Later that night, you stand outside Sunghoonâs, house, or rather mansion. With a deep breath, you ring the doorbelll, and a moment later, Sunghoon opens the door. His eyes rake over you, and thereâs that cocky familiar smirk on his face. âYoure here,â he says, stepping aside to let you in. Thereâs no hint of surprise, just a kind of smug statisfaction, like he knew youâd come.
âYeah,â you reply, stepping inside âso whatâs this all about?â Sunghoon doesnât answer immediately. He just walks past you, heading into the foyer. You follow, your curiosity piqued, but you donât miss the way his eyes flicker back to you with that same intent look. He turns around suddenly, before you can even process whatâs happening, heâs closing the distance between you, leaning in like heâs about to kiss you.
âWoah wait,â you say quickly, pressing a hand against him firm chest to stop him. âWhat do you think youâre doing?â
Sunghoon pauses, eyebrows raised, but thereâs no real apology in his expression. âWhat do you think in doing?â he counters, his voice low, almost daring him to challenge you. You roll your eyes, trying to ignore the way your heart is racing. âI didnât come here just to⌠you know.â
He smirks, leaning in just enough that you feel the warmth of his breath. âThen why did you come here?â
You hesitate, caught between wanting to play it cool and the undeniable pull you feel toward him. âMaybe I was curious.â Sunghoon chuckles, âYouâre here because you want this, sweetheart,â he murmurs, his hand grazing your hip lightly, testing your boundaries.
You swallow hard, trying to keep your composure. âYou think you know everything, donât you?â
His smirk widens. âI know enough.â He leans in again, and this time, his lips brush against your neck, a bold move that sends a jolt of heat through you. You bite your lip, figuring the urge to melt into his touch. âI didnât say you couldââ
âThen stop me,â he challenges, his voice a whisper against your skin. Your mind races every logical thought battling against the desire thatâs been simmering between you since the other night. You hate how easily he gets under your skin, how is arrogance is both infuriating and strangely alluring. But instead of pushing him away, you find yourself lingering, testing the r limits just like he is.
âYouâre infuriating,â you mutter, half annoyed, half breathless. He pulls back just enough to look you in the eye, his expression smug but hungry. âYet I donât see you walking away.â
You hate that heâs right. Instead of anything else, you meet his gaze head on, feeling that dangerous spark between you flicker into something more. âJust shut up and kiss me,â you say, finally giving in, if only to wipe that smug look off his face. And he doesâwithout hesitation, with the kind of intensity that makes your head spin. Itâs heated, unrestrained, and nothing like you imagined, and yet somehow itâs exactly what you wanted.
With a frustrated sigh, you put a hand on his chest and push him back a step. âOkay, seriously, what is this?â you demand, trying to keep your tone steady. âWe canât just keep⌠doing this whenever we feel like it. Itâs stupid.â
He raises an eyebrow, looking way too amused for your liking. âWhy not? You look like youâre enjoying yourself.â
You shoot him a glare. âDonât flatter yourself. I just⌠I donât want this to get messy.â
He smirks, clearly entertained by your struggle. âMessy? You mean you donât want people to know you like kissing me?â
You scoff, crossing your arms. âI donât like anything about you, Sunghoon. But if weâre being honest, thereâs⌠something here, and I donât see it going away anytime soon.â
His grin widens, and you want to slap it right off his face. âSo, what? Youâre proposing a deal?â
You roll your eyes. âMaybe. Friends with benefits. No strings attached, no drama, no catching feelings.â
Sunghoon chuckles, but thereâs an edge to it. âFriends? I donât think weâre even close to that.â
âFine,â you snap, annoyed that heâs right. âEnemies with benefits then. Just⌠an arrangement. To get this out of our systems.â
His gaze darkens, and for a second, you think you see something flicker there, something unreadable. But then he leans in closer, his breath hot against your ear. âAnd what makes you think Iâd agree to that?â
You raise your chin, meeting his challenge head-on. âBecause you want this just as much as I do. Maybe more.â
He pauses, his lips curling into a slow, wicked smile. âOkay, Iâll bite,â he says, his voice low. âBut hereâs the deal: we do this my way. No whining, no complaining, and you definitely donât get to pretend you donât want it.â
You scowl, hating how cocky he looks, how certain he is that youâll cave. âFine,â you bite back. âBut donât think for a second that this means I like you.â
He laughs, the sound rich and mocking. âTrust me, Iâd hate it if you did.â
You feel your blood boil at his arrogance, but thereâs a thrill in it too, in the way you both seem to enjoy this game. âDeal,â you snap, holding out your hand.
He takes it, but instead of shaking, he pulls you in closer, his lips just inches from yours. âJust remember,â he murmurs, his eyes locked on yours, âthis doesnât change anything. I still canât stand you.â
You smirk, matching his intensity. âRight back at you.â
And before you know it, his lips are crashing against yours again, and all that frustration and anger blurs into something reckless and wild. For now, youâll play his game, but you know this is far from over.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
Over the next few weeks, the âarrangementâ with Sunghoon becomes a twisted game of secrecy and tension. You find yourself sneaking glances in class, meeting him in darkened hallways between periods, and exchanging heated looks across crowded lunch tables. The two of you are constantly dancing on the edge of discovery, and itâs becoming harder to hide the intensity simmering between you.
It starts small. The accidental brush of fingers when passing by in the hallway, the way his eyes linger a little too long when youâre speaking. But then, it escalates. The stolen moments between classes turn into late-night texts and spontaneous meetings wherever you can find some privacy. Empty classrooms, deserted stairwells, even the back of the libraryâplaces where no one would think to find the two of you together. The more time passes, the harder it gets to keep up the charade.
Youâre starting to notice the way his friends glance between you two, confused by the sudden silences or the shared looks you forget to hide. Jay catches you one morning when youâre walking out of the library with Sunghoon following a few steps behind, your hair slightly mussed, your lips redder than usual.
âWhatâs going on there?â he asks, a teasing grin spreading across his face. âYou and Sunghoon plotting world domination or something?â
You laugh it off, rolling your eyes. âPlease. Heâs too much of an idiot for that.â
But Jay looks unconvinced, his gaze flicking back to where Sunghoon is standing, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, watching you with a smirk thatâs all too knowing. âSure,â Jay says, dragging out the word like heâs not buying it.
At lunch, itâs even worse. Sunghoon sits across from you, his foot nudging yours under the table. Itâs subtle, but itâs enough to send a jolt up your spine. You kick him back, hard, and he just chuckles, leaning back in his chair like heâs thoroughly enjoying the game.
âWhat are you two whispering about?â Yuna asks, narrowing her eyes in suspicion. Youâre both quick to cover it up, but itâs obvious that your friends are starting to catch on.
âNothing,â Sunghoon says smoothly, his voice annoyingly casual. âJust telling Y/N that she looks like she needs more sleep. Those dark circles are really showing.â
Your jaw clenches, but you force a sweet smile, playing along. âOh, donât worry about me. Iâll sleep just fine once I stop seeing your face every day.â
He grins, but thereâs a flicker of something more heated in his eyes, something you recognize all too well. âYeah, right.â
Karina frowns, sensing the tension that seems to hang in the air whenever you two are in the same room. âSeriously, what is up with you guys?â she asks, tilting her head.
You wave it off, laughing a little too loudly. âWeâre just being our usual selves. You know how it isâcanât stand each other.â
But your friends are starting to notice the little things. The way Sunghoonâs gaze always seems to drift in your direction, the way you keep sneaking out of group study sessions with flimsy excuses, only to return looking flustered and breathless. Sunoo even catches you and Sunghoon exchanging hushed words in the corner of the hallway, too close for comfort, and he raises an eyebrow, a mischievous grin forming on his lips.
âAre you two planning a secret mission, or is there something else we should know?â he asks, his tone playful but probing.
Sunghoon just shrugs, but you can feel his eyes on you, daring you to say something. âNo mission,â he replies coolly, âunless itâs trying to survive Y/Nâs terrible attitude.â
You force a laugh, but the heat in your cheeks gives you away. âYeah, well, some of us have better things to do than deal with you, Sunghoon.â
But itâs getting harder to pretend, harder to keep the fire between you from spilling over in front of everyone else. Every time heâs near, it feels like the world narrows down to just the two of you, a constant push and pull thatâs impossible to ignore. The stolen kisses, the midnight texts, the moments of heated bickering that seem to blur into something moreâitâs becoming too much to hide.
And itâs only a matter of time before someone figures it out.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
You grip the sheets of your bed, lip caught between your teeth as sunghoon is under your duvet, tonguing your wet entrance, heat pooling in your belly, felling the intensity of your orgasm creeping up on you.
Itâs all cut short when your door bursts open without warning, and Karina barges in, her voice already raised. âY/N, I swear Iâm going to lose my mindâ!â
You freeze, your heart stopping in your chest. âKarina!â you squeak, quickly yanking the sheets up to your chin. âWhat happened to knocking?â
Karina stops mid-rant, blinking at you. âOh, come on, like I ever knock?â she scoffs, throwing her hands up in frustration. âAnyway, you will not believe what Heeseung just didââ
Sheâs moving closer to the bed, and you panic, shifting slightly to keep Sunghoon hidden beneath the covers. You can feel him tense up, and his hand slips to your thigh under the sheets, pinching you playfully. You bite your lip to stifle a gasp, kneeing him as a warning.
Karina continues her rant, oblivious. âI mean, he had the nerve to ditch me for practice again, and Iâm justâugh, I needed to vent to someone who understands!â
Your mind races, desperately trying to keep her attention away from the suspicious lump between your legs. âThat sounds⌠really frustrating,â you say, a bit too brightly. âBut maybe just, you know, talk to him?â
Karina flops down on the edge of your bed, dangerously close to Sunghoonâs concealed figure. âOh, Iâll talk to him, alright. Iâm just so sick of his stupid excusesââ
Sunghoonâs fingers press into your clit under the sheets. Heâs grinning, enjoying the situation far too much. You jab him again, your heart racing.
Karina glances at you, finally noticing your tense posture. âAre you okay? Youâre acting weird,â she says, her brows furrowing.
You force a laugh, your voice too high. âIâm fine! Just⌠woke up. Didnât expect you to burst in like that.â
She raises an eyebrow. âSince when do you care if I burst in? And why are you so⌠red?â
You feel the heat creeping up your neck. âUh, just⌠hot in here,â you stammer, shifting to keep Sunghoon completely out of sight.
Karina looks like sheâs about to press further, but then she sighs, clearly more focused on her Heeseung drama. âWhatever, I just needed to get that off my chest. He drives me insane!â
You nod quickly. âYeah, I get it. Heâs⌠Heeseung, you know?â Karina gives you a small smile, her frustration easing. âThanks for listening. And seriously, you look so weird right now.â
You laugh nervously. âYeah, just tired.â
Finally, she stands up, heading toward the door. âAlright, Iâll leave you to⌠whatever you were doing. Iâm gonna go call him and give him a piece of my mind.â
You nod eagerly. âGood luck with that!â
As soon as she leaves, you exhale in relief, lifting the cover to eye Sunghoon, whoâs still grinning like an idiot. âWhat?â he whispers, amused.
âWhat?â you repeat, incredulous. âYou almost got us caught, thatâs what!â
He chuckles, pulling you back down under the sheets. âRelax. She didnât notice a thing.â
You roll your eyes, but your heart is still racing from the close call. âYouâre lucky,â you mutter.
Sunghoon just leans in closer, his lips brushing your cheek. âYou love the thrill,â he murmurs.
And damn it, you hate that heâs right.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
It's late, the night air cool against your skin as you lean against the wall outside the school building, waiting for Sunghoon. You don't even know why you agreed to meet him here. Maybe because he seemed so insistent, or maybe because a part of you wanted to see him, even though youâd never admit it.
He arrives moments later, his footsteps heavy as he approaches. Thereâs a different energy about him tonightâsomething serious, something intense. His usual smirk is nowhere to be found, and his hands are shoved deep into his pockets. He stops in front of you, a little too close, and you have to tilt your head up to meet his eyes.
âWhatâs this about?â you ask, trying to sound casual, though your heart is pounding in your chest.
He doesnât answer right away, his gaze boring into yours like heâs searching for something, something he canât quite find. You shift on your feet, uncomfortable under his scrutiny.
âSunghoon?â you prompt, your voice wavering just slightly.
He finally speaks, his tone lower than usual. âIâve been thinking⌠about us,â he says, the words almost hesitant, like heâs testing them out.
You blink, caught off guard. âUs?â
He nods, his expression serious. âYeah, Y/N, us. You and me⌠whatever this is.â
You swallow hard, trying to keep your face neutral. âI thought we agreed itâs nothing,â you reply, but your voice comes out softer than you intended.
Sunghoonâs eyes narrow, frustration flashing in his gaze. âYeah, thatâs what we said,â he agrees, âbut it doesnât feel like nothing to me anymore.â
Your heart skips a beat, and you feel a lump forming in your throat. Youâve never seen him like thisâso open, so exposed. âSunghoon, I donât know what youâre getting at,â you say carefully.
He takes a step closer, his expression more intense. âIâm saying that Iâve caught myself⌠thinking about you. A lot. When youâre not around, Iâm wondering what youâre doing, who youâre with. I hate that it bothers me when I see you talking to other guys, and I canât stand the idea of you being with anyone else.â
You feel a wave of panic rising in your chest. This is too much, too fast. You press your back harder against the wall as if trying to create more distance between you. âSunghoon, this was never supposed to be serious,â you whisper, your voice barely audible.
He exhales sharply, running a hand through his hair. âI know, and I tried to keep it that way. But every time I see you, every time weâre together⌠I canât help it. I donât want to help it.â
You shake your head, refusing to let his words sink in. âYou donât mean that,â you insist, more to yourself than to him. âYouâre just saying this because itâs⌠new or whatever. Itâll pass.â
Sunghoonâs jaw clenches, and he moves even closer, leaving barely any space between you. âNo, Y/N, it wonât. Iâve tried to stop feeling this way, but I canât. And I know you feel something too, even if you wonât admit it.â
Your pulse quickens, and you feel your resolve starting to crumble. âI donâtââ you begin, but he cuts you off.
âStop lying,â he says firmly, his voice carrying a hint of desperation. âYouâre scared, I get it. But donât pretend like this is all just a game to you.â
You feel a flash of anger, your defenses rising. âWhat if it is, Sunghoon? What if I donât want anything more than what we already have?â
His expression falters for a moment, a flicker of hurt crossing his face. âThen I guess Iâve made a mistake,â he murmurs, taking a step back.
You feel a pang in your chest, a sharp, unexpected ache. âSunghoonâŚâ
He shakes his head, cutting you off. âForget it. I shouldnât have said anything.â
For a second, you want to reach out, to say something, anything, to make that look on his face go away. But the fear of letting your guard down, of admitting that he might be right, keeps you silent.
He takes another step back, his expression hardening. âI wonât bother you about it again,â he says, his voice cold. âLetâs just go back to pretending like none of this ever happened.â
You nod, though you feel a tightness in your throat. âYeah, letâs do that,â you say quietly, even though your chest aches with a feeling you donât want to name.
Sunghoon turns and walks away, and youâre left standing there, the cool night air biting at your skin. You watch him go, feeling something inside you break just a little, and you wonder if maybe youâve made a mistake too.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
The next morning at school, everything feels heavier. The halls are crowded, but itâs like thereâs a spotlight following you, and you canât shake the feeling that everyone knows. You make your way to your locker, avoiding eye contact with anyone, especially Sunghoon.
You donât see him at first, but you feel himâhis presence looming in the periphery. Itâs like heâs everywhere, watching you, and it makes your skin prickle with nerves. You busy yourself with rearranging your textbooks, trying to calm the storm inside your head.
âHey, Y/N,â Karina chirps, appearing beside you. Her usual bright smile is there, but her eyes are curious, searching your face. âAre you okay? You seemed a little⌠off yesterday.â
You force a smile, gripping your locker door tighter than necessary. âYeah, just tired, I guess.â
She studies you for a second longer, then nods. âWell, you should have come to dinner with us last night. It was a total mess, as always, but fun.â
You nod absently, not really listening. Your eyes flick over Karinaâs shoulder and catch Sunghoonâs gaze across the hallway. Heâs leaning against the wall, arms crossed, watching you with an unreadable expression.
âY/N?â Karina prompts, bringing your attention back to her. âYouâre zoning out again.â
âSorry,â you mumble. âJust a lot on my mind.â
Karina glances over her shoulder, following your line of sight. Her brow furrows slightly. âYouâve been weird around Sunghoon lately,â she remarks. âDid something happen?â
Your heart skips a beat, and you quickly shake your head. âNo, nothing. Why would you think that?â
She shrugs, unconvinced. âI donât know⌠Just a feeling.â
Youâre saved from having to respond when the bell rings. You grab your books and make a beeline for your next class, trying to ignore the heat of Sunghoonâs stare burning into your back.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
Class drags on painfully. You canât focus. Your mind is a whirlwind of confusion and annoyance. You thought sneaking around with Sunghoon would be fun, a gameâa way to blow off steam. But now itâs getting messy, and youâre starting to feel the consequences.
When the bell finally rings, you bolt out of the classroom, desperate for fresh air. But as soon as you turn the corner, youâre yanked into an empty hallway.
Sunghoon.
His grip on your arm is firm, and his eyes are intense, searching yours. âWe need to talk,â he says, his voice low.
You pull your arm free, glaring at him. âWhatâs there to talk about, Sunghoon? We agreed this was supposed to be casual. No strings, remember?â
He frowns, clearly irritated by your tone. âYeah, but it doesnât feel like that anymore, does it?â
You cross your arms over your chest, trying to steady your breathing. âThatâs because youâre making it weird. Just⌠back off a little, okay?â
Sunghoonâs jaw clenches, and he takes a step closer. âBack off? Youâre the one acting all paranoid, Y/N.â
âMaybe because you wonât stop staring at me like everyone else canât see it!â you snap back, your voice rising. âThis was supposed to be simple. But youâre turning it into something⌠complicated.â
He scoffs, a humorless smile tugging at his lips. âMaybe because it is complicated. Or have you not noticed?â
You hate the way your chest tightens at his words, the way his closeness makes your heart race. âDonât do this, Sunghoon,â you warn, your voice quieter, more vulnerable than youâd like.
He pauses, his gaze softening just for a second. âDo what?â
âMake this more than it is,â you whisper, feeling a knot form in your throat. âBecause I canât⌠I wonât.â
Sunghoonâs expression hardens again, and he leans back, crossing his arms defensively. âFine,â he mutters. âIf thatâs how you want it.â
You swallow, forcing yourself to stay composed. âYeah. It is.â
He nods curtly, stepping away, his face unreadable. âGood. See you around, then,â he says before turning on his heel and walking away, leaving you standing in the empty hallway with your heart in your throat.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
The next few days are torture. Sunghoon keeps his distance, and you tell yourself itâs for the best. But every time you see him, every time you catch his eyes across the cafeteria or in class, thereâs a hollow ache in your chest that you canât ignore.
Your friends notice the tension. They ask questions, but you shrug it off, pretending everythingâs fine. But you canât stop replaying your last conversation with Sunghoon, the way his face looked when you told him to back off. You hate how much you miss him, even if youâd never admit it to anyone, especially not to him.
One afternoon, as youâre walking to your car after school, you spot him leaning against a tree nearby, talking to some girl you donât recognize. Heâs smiling, that same smile that used to be reserved for your private moments. Something sharp twists in your chest, and you quickly look away, anger flaring up.
He catches your glance and, for a moment, his smile falters. But then he leans in closer to the girl, laughing at something she says, and your stomach churns with a mix of jealousy and frustration.
You grip your bag tighter, feeling a sting behind your eyes. This is exactly why you didnât want things to get complicated. You turn away, refusing to look back.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
Sunghoon avoids you. Heâs usually the first one to shoot a teasing remark your way, but heâs silent. The hallways feel strangely empty without his usual jabs, and your friends are starting to notice the shift between you two.
âAre you guys fighting again?â Karina asks, as the two of you walk to lunch. Her tone is half-exasperated, half-amused, but you know sheâs genuinely curious. âYou and Sunghoon, I mean. Thereâs definitely more tension than usual.â
You shrug, trying to seem indifferent, but your stomach twists with anxiety. âWhen arenât we fighting?â you mutter.
She gives you a knowing look, but thankfully doesnât push it further. Youâre not sure how much more of this you can take without your feelings bubbling over. Youâre determined to get through lunch without letting Sunghoon get under your skin, but when you enter the cafeteria, you spot him immediately.
Heâs at your usual table, talking to Heeseung, but his gaze is elsewhere. The second you walk in, his eyes find yours, and thereâs a fleeting moment of something unreadable in his expression. A flash of frustration? Longing? You canât be sure.
You take a deep breath and head over, sliding into your usual seat. Karina sits next to you, and for a moment, everything feels normal. But then Sunghoon starts talking.
âSo,â he says, his tone casual but his eyes locked on you, âHeeseung, heard you and Karina had another spat. What was it this time? You didnât say âI love youâ enough?â
Heeseung rolls his eyes, but Karina just laughs, lightly smacking Heeseungâs arm. âDonât listen to him, babe. Heâs just deflecting from his own issues,â she teases.
Sunghoon smirks, but thereâs no real humor in it. âI donât have issues, Karina. Just people who like to make things complicated,â he says, glancing at you.
You feel your face heat up, irritation boiling over. âOh, please,â you snap back. âLike youâre the picture of simplicity.â
He leans back in his chair, his eyes glinting with challenge. âNever said I was. But at least Iâm honest about it.â
Your chest tightens. âHonest?â you scoff. âYouâve been playing games from the start, Sunghoon.â
He shrugs, feigning indifference. âMaybe I have. But at least I know what I want.â
His words send a jolt of electricity through you, and you clench your jaw, trying to keep your composure. âAnd whatâs that, exactly?â
He leans forward, his voice dropping low so only you can hear. âYou. But you already knew that.â
Your heart skips a beat. For a second, youâre frozen, caught between wanting to slap him and⌠something else. Something youâre not ready to face.
âYouâre such aââ you start, but before you can finish, Sunghoonâs foot nudges yours under the table, and your breath hitches.
Youâre hyper-aware of the table between you, the curious glances from your friends, and the heat creeping up your neck. Sunghoonâs gaze is still on you, challenging, waiting for your response.
You canât help the retort that slips out. âYouâre really enjoying this, arenât you?â
He shrugs with a small grin. âMore than you know.â
Before you can shoot back another insult, heeseung cuts in, oblivious to the tension. âOkay, what is happening between you two? I feel like I missed an entire chapter here.â
Sunghoon doesnât even glance at Heeseung. âNothingâs happening. Right, Y/N?â
âRight,â you reply, forcing a smile, but your voice sounds strained, even to your own ears.
Heeseung and Karina exchange a look, clearly unconvinced. âSure, whatever you say,â Karina murmurs with a smirk. âJust remember, denial isnât just a river in Egypt.â
Sunghoonâs lips twitch in amusement, and he finally looks away, leaning back in his chair as if nothing happened. But under the table, his foot is still lightly brushing against yours, sending sparks up your leg.
You bite the inside of your cheek, determined not to let him see how much heâs getting to you.
But you canât help itâthe sensation, the frustration, and the undeniable attraction between you are all mixing into one chaotic storm.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
The bell rings, signaling the end of lunch, and everyone begins to gather their things. You stand, trying to shake off the tension still lingering between you and Sunghoon, but Karina has other ideas.
âHey, Y/N,â she calls, grabbing your arm just as youâre about to head out. âCan I talk to you for a second?â
You nod, feeling a knot form in your stomach. She leads you to a quieter corner of the hallway, away from the crowd. You can tell by the look on her face that sheâs not letting this go.
Karina crosses her arms, tilting her head slightly. âOkay, seriously,â she starts, her voice low but pointed. âWhat the fuck was that back there?â
You blink, trying to feign ignorance. âWhat was what?â
She rolls her eyes. âDonât play dumb with me. You and Sunghoon⌠there was some serious tension at lunch. It was like watching a live soap opera, and I feel like Iâve missed a few episodes.â
You sigh, glancing around to make sure no one is listening in. âItâs nothing, Karina,â you insist, but even to your own ears, it sounds unconvincing.
Karina raises an eyebrow. âNothing? Really? Because from where I was sitting, it looked like something. A big something.â
You bite your lip, unsure of how much to tell her. âLook, we⌠we just donât get along. You know that.â
âYeah, but this felt different,â she replies, not letting up. âLike, I donât know, it almost seemed like⌠there was something more there.â
Her words hit a little too close to home, and you feel your cheeks heat up. âYouâre imagining things,â you say quickly, but Karinaâs not buying it.
She leans in closer, her expression turning more serious. âY/N, Iâm your best friend. I know when somethingâs up. And that? That was definitely something.â
You hesitate, torn between the urge to confide in her and the fear of admitting the truth. âItâs complicated,â you finally admit, your voice barely a whisper.
Karinaâs eyes widen with intrigue. âComplicated how?â
You swallow hard, looking away. âI donât even know how to explain it. Weâve just⌠been hanging out a little more lately. And things got⌠weird.â
âWeird how?â she presses, clearly not letting this go.
You take a deep breath, trying to find the right words. âWeâve been⌠hooking up,â you confess, your voice almost inaudible.
Karinaâs mouth falls open in shock. âWait, what? You and Sunghoon?â She looks like she doesnât know whether to laugh or gasp. âSince when?â
âA few weeks,â you admit, feeling a strange mix of relief and anxiety now that the secret is out.
Karina blinks, taking a moment to process. âAnd you didnât think to tell me?â
âI didnât think it would last this long,â you say defensively. âI thought it was just going to be a one-time thing, but then⌠it wasnât.â
Karinaâs expression softens slightly. âAnd how do you feel about it? About him?â
You shrug, trying to appear nonchalant. âI donât know. Itâs confusing. Half the time, I canât stand him. The other half⌠well, you saw how lunch went.â
Karina lets out a small laugh. âYeah, I did. Itâs like you two canât decide whether you want to kill each other or⌠not.â
You groan, leaning back against the wall. âThatâs exactly how it feels.â
Karina nudges you with her elbow. âJust be careful, okay? Sunghoonâs not exactly known for being straightforward with his feelings.â
You nod, appreciating her concern. âI know. Trust me, Iâm not expecting anything⌠much. Itâs just⌠whatever it is.â
Karina gives you a knowing smile. âAlright, but just remember, Iâm here if you need to talk. Or, you know, if you need me to kick his ass.â
You laugh, feeling some of the tension ease. âIâll keep that in mind.â
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
As you walk back to class, you feel a little lighter, but also more uncertain than ever. Because now that Karina knows, it feels more real. And that scares you more than youâd like to admit.
You pause for a moment, letting your thoughts catch up to your racing heart. Sunghoon had admitted it first, hadn't he? In his own cryptic way, heâd confessed he wanted more than just the back-and-forth, more than just the thrill of the chase. You remember the way he looked at you that day, his eyes full of frustration and something else â something softer, something you werenât ready to face.
Heâd said he wanted you. Heâd practically dared you to deny that you wanted him, too. And ever since, youâve been trying to convince yourself that it didn't matter â that it was just some passing thing, some fling to fill the boredom. But it wasn't. It never was.
You sigh deeply, leaning back against the wall of the building. The memory of his words still lingers like a brand on your skin: "I want you." It had sounded so simple when he said it, so sure. Like he wasnât afraid of the mess that came with it.
Youâve been too afraid to admit it to yourself, but now⌠now it feels like youâve been fighting a battle thatâs already lost.
He confessed his feelings first, but youâve been holding back, afraid to let yourself feel the same. Afraid of what it might mean, of how it could change things between you. You thought you could control it, could manage the situation and keep your distance, but all youâve managed to do is dig yourself deeper into this mess.
Youâre tired. Tired of fighting your own heart, tired of pretending youâre unaffected. Tired of feeling like you're caught in this tug-of-war between desire and denial.
*Heâs already put himself out there,* you remind yourself. *He made the first move.* And that thought alone is enough to push you forward, to make you realize that maybe itâs your turn now. Your turn to decide if you want to keep running or if youâre brave enough to let yourself fall.
Pushing off the wall, you feel a wave of determination settle over you. If youâre going to do this, you need to find him and be honest. Not just with him, but with yourself.
Because you donât want to keep this back-and-forth going, this constant dance of pushing and pulling. You want to know where you stand â with him, and with whatever this thing between you is becoming.
You take a deep breath and start walking, knowing exactly where to find him. And this time, youâre not going to let him get away without an answer.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
You find Sunghoon by the lockers, leaning against the metal with that typical nonchalant pose he seems to have perfected. His head is tilted down, focused on his phone, but he looks up as you approach, sensing your presence. His eyes flicker with surprise for just a moment before his usual guarded expression returns.
âWhat do you want?â he asks, his voice laced with that familiar arrogance, but thereâs something else there, tooâan undercurrent of curiosity, maybe even hope.
You donât bother with pleasantries. âWe need to talk,â you say, crossing your arms over your chest. You try to sound firm, but even you can hear the slight waver in your voice. Sunghoon raises an eyebrow, clearly intrigued.
âOh, so now you want to talk?â he retorts, a smirk playing at the corner of his lips. âAfter avoiding me all day?â
You roll your eyes, feeling the tension bubble up again. âI wasnât avoiding you,â you snap, even though you both know itâs a lie. âI just needed⌠time to think.â
He straightens up, slipping his phone into his pocket. âThink about what?â he asks, and his tone is a little softer now, less mocking.
You take a deep breath, feeling the weight of your next words pressing down on you. âAbout this. About us,â you say, your voice steadier now. âIâm tired of all this back and forth, Sunghoon. Iâm tired of pretending like thereâs nothing between us when we both know there is.â
His eyes search yours, and for a moment, his guard slips. âI told you how I felt,â he says quietly, his voice barely above a whisper. âYouâre the one who kept pretending it was just⌠nothing.â
You feel a pang of guilt twist in your stomach. âI know,â you admit, meeting his gaze head-on. âAnd I was wrong. I thought I could just⌠push it away, ignore it. But I canât. Not anymore.â
Sunghoonâs expression softens, just a little. âSo what are you saying?â he asks, his voice careful, as if heâs trying not to hope too much.
You swallow hard, forcing yourself to stay honest. âIâm saying⌠I want to figure this out. I want to try⌠whatever this is between us. But I need you to be real with me, Sunghoon. No more games.â
He takes a step closer, closing the distance between you, and you can feel your heart pounding in your chest. âIâve been real,â he says, his voice low and intense. âIâve been real since that night at Karinaâs party, and Iâve been waiting for you to catch up.â
Youâre taken aback by the sincerity in his words, by the way his eyes seem to bore into yours like heâs trying to see into your very soul. âIâm here now,â you reply, your voice barely a whisper.
Sunghoon takes another step closer, and now heâs right in front of you, his breath warm on your skin. âSo what do you want?â he murmurs, his hand reaching up to brush a strand of hair from your face. âDo you want me, or are you still trying to convince yourself you donât?â
Your breath catches in your throat, and for a moment, youâre not sure what to say. But then you realize youâve known the answer all along. âI want you,â you admit, your voice steady, finally letting the truth slip past your lips. âBut I donât want to keep pretending like itâs nothing. I want to try⌠something real. But I donât want it to be this constant push and pull, Sunghoon. I canât keep doing that.â
Sunghoonâs lips curl into a small, almost relieved smile. âThen letâs stop playing games,â he says softly, leaning in closer. âLetâs see where this goes, no more pretending. Just you and me.â
You feel a strange sense of relief wash over you at his words, a weight lifting from your chest. âOkay,â you whisper, and it feels like the most honest thing youâve said in a long time.
His smile widens just a fraction, and he closes the final distance between you, his lips brushing against yours in a way that feels both familiar and new. Itâs not the frantic, heated kisses youâve shared beforeâitâs slower, deeper, filled with a promise of something more.
And for the first time, you feel like youâre finally on the same page. Finally moving in the same direction.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
Over the next few weeks, things between you and Sunghoon change in ways you never could have anticipated. At first, itâs subtle â small shifts that only the two of you notice. You spend more time together between classes, sitting closer at lunch, and texting late into the night. The playful bickering is still there, but itâs softened somehow, more like an inside joke than a battle.
Your friends donât notice at first. Theyâre used to seeing you and Sunghoon together, arguing about this or that, so the extra time you spend with him doesn't raise any immediate red flags. But eventually, the signs become too obvious to ignore.
One day at lunch, youâre sitting next to Sunghoon, your legs brushing under the table. His hand casually rests on the back of your chair, his thumb occasionally grazing your shoulder. Jay, seated across from you, narrows his eyes, a slow smile spreading across his face. âOkay, whatâs going on?â he asks, his tone teasing but his eyes curious.
You glance over at Sunghoon, who just smirks. âWhat do you mean?â you reply, trying to sound nonchalant, but you can feel the flush creeping up your neck.
Jay gestures between the two of you. âThis,â he says, waving his hand. âYou two. Youâre being weird. Weird even for you two.â
Karina, whoâs been listening in, gasps. âOh my god,â she says, her eyes widening with realization. âAre you guys⌠together?â
The table goes silent for a second, everyone turning to look at you. Sunooâs eyebrows shoot up, and Jake leans forward, looking like heâs trying to solve a particularly complicated math problem.
Sunghoon leans back, crossing his arms over his chest with a grin. âDepends,â he says casually. âWhat do you think?â
You elbow him in the side, rolling your eyes at his vague answer. âYes,â you say, looking at your friends. âWeâre⌠together. Kind of.â
âKind of?â Sunghoon echoes, feigning offense, and you shoot him a playful glare.
âYes, kind of!â you insist, turning back to your friends, who are now staring at you like youâve just revealed youâre secretly an alien. âItâs⌠new.â
Heeseung chuckles. âI mean, Iâm not totally surprised,â he says, leaning back in his chair. âYou two have been like a powder keg waiting to explode for years.â
Yuna nods eagerly. âHonestly, it was about time,â she adds, and you canât help but laugh at her bluntness.
Jungwon, however, looks mildly concerned. âSo, youâre serious?â he asks, glancing between you and Sunghoon. âLike, actually serious?â
Sunghoon looks at you, his smile softening just a bit, and he nods. âYeah,â he says, and thereâs a sincerity in his voice that makes your heart skip a beat. âWeâre serious.â
Your friends take a moment to process this. Then Jake grins. âAlright,â he says, raising his glass of soda. âTo Y/N and Sunghoon. The enemies-to-lovers arc we didnât know we needed.â
You laugh, and everyone joins in, raising their glasses. Itâs strange, in a way, seeing everyone so quickly accept what feels like a massive shift in your life. But it also feels⌠right.
Ëŕ¨ŕ§âď˝ĄË â
Over the next few days, things become more obvious. You and Sunghoon are no longer trying to hide. He reaches for your hand in the hallways, and you let him. He kisses you on the cheek in front of the others, and they pretend to gag but smile knowingly when they think youâre not looking.
You catch Karinaâs eye one afternoon, and she gives you a grin thatâs part smug, part excited. She leans over, whispering, âSo⌠you finally admitted you like him, huh?â
You smile, shrugging a bit. âGuess so,â you say, and she laughs, nudging you with her elbow.
The hardest part, strangely enough, is getting used to the change yourself. Itâs still weird to not have to hide how you feel, to be able to smile at Sunghoon without wondering if anyone is watching. But with each passing day, it gets a little easier.
And itâs not like everything is perfect. You and Sunghoon still argue â of course, you do. Thatâs just how you are. But thereâs something different now, something that feels less like anger and more like⌠passion. Like youâre both on the same side, even when youâre bickering.
There are moments when you catch him looking at you from across the room, a small smile on his lips, and you feel a warmth spread through your chest. And in those moments, you know â this is real. This is right.
Your friends have stopped asking questions. Theyâve accepted that this is your new normal, and honestly, so have you. The only thing left to do is see where it takes you.
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Article | Paywall-Free
"The Environmental Protection Agency finalized a rule Tuesday [October 8, 2024] requiring water utilities to replace all lead pipes within a decade, a move aimed at eliminating a toxic threat that continues to affect tens of thousands of American children each year.
The move, which also tightens the amount of lead allowed in the nationâs drinking water, comes nearly 40 years after Congress determined that lead pipes posed a serious risk to public health and banned them in new construction.
Research has shown that lead, a toxic contaminant that seeps from pipes into the drinking water supply, can cause irreversible developmental delays, difficulty learning and behavioral problems among children. In adults, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, lead exposure can cause increased blood pressure, heart disease, decreased kidney function and cancer.
But replacing the lead pipes that deliver water to millions of U.S. homes will cost tens of billions of dollars, and the push to eradicate them only gathered momentum after a water crisis in Flint, Mich., a decade ago exposed the extent to which children remain vulnerable to lead poisoning through tap water...
The groundbreaking regulation, called the Lead and Copper Rule Improvements, will establish a national inventory of lead service lines and require that utilities take more aggressive action to remove lead pipes on homeownersâ private property. It also lowers the level of lead contamination that will trigger government enforcement from 15 parts per billion (ppb) to 10 ppb.
The rule also establishes the first-ever national requirement to test for lead in schools that rely on water from public utilities. It mandates thatwater systems screen all elementary and child-care facilities, where those who are the most vulnerable to leadâs effects â young children â are enrolled, and that they offer testing to middle and high schools.
The White House estimates that more than 9 million homes across the country are still supplied by lead pipelines, which are the leading source of lead contamination through drinking water. The EPA has projected that replacing all of them could cost at least $45 billion.
Lead pipes were initially installed in cities decades ago because they were cheaper and more malleable, but the heavy metal can wear down and corrode over time. President Joe Biden has made replacing them one of his top environmental priorities, securing $15 billion to give states over five years through the bipartisan infrastructure law and vowing to rid the country of lead pipes by 2031. The administration has spent $9 billion so far â enough to replace up to 1.7 million lead pipes, the administration said.
On Tuesday, the administration said it was providing an additional $2.6 billion in funding for pipe replacement. Over 367,000 lead pipes have been replaced nationwide since Biden took office, according to White House officials, affecting nearly 1 million people...
Environmental advocates said that former president Donald Trump, who issued much more modest revisions to the lead and copper rule just days before Biden took office, would have a hard time reversing the new standards.
Erik Olson, the senior strategic director for health at the Natural Resources Defense Council, said that the Safe Drinking Water Act has provisions prohibiting weakening the health protections of existing standards...
Olson added that the rule ârepresents a major victory for public healthâ and will protect millions of people âwhose health is threatened every time they fill a glass from the kitchen sink contaminated by lead.â
âWhile the rule is imperfect and we still have more to do, this is by far the biggest step towards eliminating lead in tap water in over three decades,â he said."
-via The Washington Post, October 8, 2024
#lead#lead pipe#lead poisoning#united states#us politics#epa#clean water#drinking water#public health#environmental protection#child development#biden#biden administration#kamala harris#good news#hope#voting matters
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the boy is mine - r.c.
(blurb, 1.4k words, season 4 bf!rafe x gf!reader)
summary he's got finally got his shit tight, but now everybody wants him, and that just won't do...
content fem receiving oral, 18+ minors do not interact
â§ď˝Ľďž: *â§ď˝Ľďž:* *:シďžâ§*:シďžâ§ď˝Ľďž: *â§ď˝Ľďž:* *:シďžâ§*:シďžâ§
The sun was hot and angry, casting a golden glow on Rafe as he cracked another beer and threw it back. You watched his tall frame from your beach chair, lip between your teeth as you took in the sharp panes of his stomach. You squirmed slightly while your eyes tracked the little trail of hair that led lower, lowerâŚ
But you werenât the only one looking.Â
The music bumped through someoneâs speaker as a group of bikini-clad girls pulled up their chairs and umbrellas right next to your groupâs coveted spot.
Your friend leaned over in her beach chair, âthink someoneâs got eyes for your man.â You followed her nod to the gaggle of bottle blondes with fake tans who were whispering to each other and smiling in his direction.Â
âThatâs cute,â you snorted.
Rafe was none the wiser to their stares, reaching his hand down to help you to your feet, pulling you toward the water behind him.
âThink youâve got some fans,â you told him once you were bobbing in the waves, your arms around his neck as he crouched low to meet your eyeline.
He smirked, âmaybe I should go sign some autographs.â
You smacked his shoulder, making him laugh despite your pouty frown. He stood from the water, lifting you with him so they could see your legs wrap around his waist. He grabbed your ass, holding you up with ease as his lips found yours.
The girls on the beach were suddenly very busy checking their phones and setting up umbrellas, disappointed looks on their faces as Rafe showed you off.
Back at his house, Rafe lead you into the outdoor shower, turning on the lukewarm water to wash the sea and sand from your body. When he caught you frowning, he tapped the side of your head gently, his signature way of asking whatâs on your mind.
âIâm glad youâre so successful, I just donât like that everybody suddenly wants whatâs mine,â you explained.
He looked down at you, eyelids low as his gaze traveled over your body. His hands slid up your sides slowly, thumbs slipping under the thin string of your bikini top, sweeping over your ribs.
âSo possessive,â he smirked.
âJust think everyone should know youâre off limits by now,â you whispered, stepping closer to him until you were chest to chest.
You nudged your nose against his neck, guiding him to tilt his chin up and reveal his throat to you. Your lips started out soft, tickling him with little kitten licks between each gentle kiss. When you reached his Adamâs apple, you let your teeth graze over the sensitive skin. Rafe winced, his obvious erection pressing against your belly and making you hungrier for him than ever.Â
Finally, you sucked harder, right where his neck meets his broad chest. After a few moments of pressure, you pulled back and wiped the glossy spit from your lips, smiling in satisfaction at the purple-blue mark you left on him. You moved to leave another, but he interrupted you.
âBet those girls on the beach wouldnât tease me this much,â he grumbled.
You responded by wrapping your fingers around his throat. He chuckled smugly under your hold, deep vibration tickling your palm. Itâs merely a symbolic gesture, your small hand doesnât even fit half way around his neck. You squeezed harder, but he was still smiling. You narrowed your eyes at him, no more fucking around.
Your hand snaked up higher, around to the back of his neck. As you ran your fingers up over his buzzed hair, you let your nails scratch enough to raise goosebumps along his skin. When you reached as high as you could go, standing up on your tiptoes and still nowhere near matching his height, you pressed his head down hard, nails digging into his scalp.Â
Rafe stumbled for just a second before understanding the assignment. He lowered to his knees slowly, shuffling forward until your back brushed against the wall, the water from the shower cascading over your shoulders and down your body.
âBet those girls on the beach couldnât make you drop to your knees without saying a single word either,â you taunted him.
He grabbed your hips and dug his fingers in, pushing you back against the wall hard.
âTell me who else, baby,â you continued, âwho else can put big bad Rafe Cameron on his knees? Hmm?â
His stare was icy as he looked up at you from the ground. You returned your hand to the top of his head, redirecting his gaze to your bikini bottoms.
âShow me who you belong to, baby boy.â
You could tell he was considering fighting back, the desire for control almost tempting enough to bring him back to his feet. But then he saw the growing wet spot over your center. Licking his lips, he nodded slowly, like a king admiring his feast.
His long fingers untied your bathing suit strings one at a time, causing the thin fabric to fall away and leave you bare in front of him. You lifted one foot to his shoulder, lowering him even further.
Rafe looked up at you, eyelashes fluttering over his pretty blue eyes as he spread you with his first and middle finger, his tongue flicking between them and hitting right where you needed it to.
âExactly like that,â you sighed, head falling back so the water from the showerhead ran through your hair like a waterfall. âYou know just what to do.â
No rush, he took his time. This was his house. He could take you on any surface, in any room, at any time. And he would. But first he was gonna make you come on his tongue right out in the open air.Â
Heâd developed this whole neighborhood, practically running this half of the island at this point. All these new houses were filled with people who owed him money. He runs this shit, and yet here he was, on his knees for you. The thought was so fucking hot, you had to bite back your moan.
âNah let it out, angel,â he coaxed between sharp licks to your clit. âI want you to scream âtil the neighbors hear, yeah?â
You smiled big at that command, âyou want all your new neighbors to hate you?â
âI donât care what they think as long as their checks clear.âÂ
He lowered his mouth to your entrance, lapping you up, grinding his nose back and forth on your clit until he was completely buried, covered in you. You couldnât even feel the water falling on you anymore, your skin on fire with pleasure. Rafeâs hands slid up your thighs and over your stomach, before slipping under your bikini top and palming your tits with perfect pressure.
As instructed, you let your moans and cries fly. When he let one hand fall from your chest so he could slip two fingers inside you, curling at the knuckles and tapping the tips against your g-spot, your whole body trembled.
âMmm, thatâs perfect,â you praised. âYou gonna make me come all over your face?â
âFuck yes,â he groaned, licking a long stripe across your clit. âMake a mess for me, baby.â
He circled back, dragging his tongue the other way as his fingers danced along your walls. Your foot pushed hard against his shoulder, like you were trying to stomp him out, but he held himself up against you, the burning stretch in your thigh only adding to the intense pleasure.
âOh my god! Yes, yes Rafe!â
You soaked him, one hand on his head and the other digging into the flesh of his shoulder as you came.
When you finally cooled down, body weak and wrung out with pleasure, he stood and guided you even further under the cool stream of the shower. He rubbed his hand along your inner thigh, letting the remnants of your high wash down the drain.Â
âNow why the fuck would I need any other girl when you give me that, huh?â
âThatâs right, baby,â you agreed with a blissed out grin. âI got so much more for you, too.â
Rafe carried you into the house, and he didnât even have to ask for you to get on your knees.Â
Before you started, he made sure all the windows were wide open so everyone in the neighborhood could hear exactly who he belonged to.
â§ď˝Ľďž: *â§ď˝Ľďž:* *:シďžâ§*:シďžâ§ď˝Ľďž: *â§ď˝Ľďž:* *:シďžâ§*:シďžâ§
#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron#rafe cameron fic#rafe fic#obx fic#drew starkey#rafe fanfic#rafe obx#obx 4#rafe cameron smut#rafe Cameron x you#rafe Cameron x y/n#rafe Cameron imagine#rafe Cameron season 4#obx#obx smut#rafe smut#rafe cameron blurb#rafe x reader#rafe cameron fanfiction
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starry eyed
bucky barnes x reader
word count: 3.2k
summary: reader gets a special gift from her secret santa
warnings/tags: mostly just fluff, mutual pining, friends to lovers, avenger!reader, no use of y/n, one minor injury, language, kissing and some sensuality
author's note: short little feel good christmas fic! everyone is alive and happy because i say so. i originally got the idea for this fic last winter, but i hadn't got back into writing at that time. happy that i was able to put it into words finally.
my masterlist
âSo, whose name did you draw?â
You shove your hand into an oven mitt, grabbing a large dish out of the oven. Everyone had been assigned to bring a different breakfast food to the Christmas morning potluck.
Sam brought chocolate chip pancakes, Steve brought a shit ton of sausage links, and Sharon brought a giant fruit platter to name a few. You figured that the easiest, cheapest way to help feed a group of a dozen people is a couple tubes of Pillsbury cinnamon rolls.
âThat kinda takes the secret out of Secret Santa.â
Bucky leans on the island in the middle of the compoundâs kitchen, drinking his second cup of coffee of the morning. His breakfast dish of choice? A sack of two dozen McDonaldâs hash browns.
âI was just testing you,â Bucky jokes. âYou passed. Do you want to know who got your name?â
âNo!â You whack his stomach with the oven mitt and he feigns injury. âI do not. Have I passed all of your tests?â
âIâm proud,â Bucky says after a big gulp of coffee. âYouâre stronger than Sam, at least. Heâs been asking everyone who drew his name for the last week.â
You roll your eyes. âHe does that every year and no one ever tells him.â
Your friends begin filing into the kitchen, everyone grabbing plates and piling them high with all of the food scattered across the island. After making your plate, you retreat to the living room and nestle yourself between Natasha and Sharon on the couch.
Everyone is so occupied with stuffing their faces that thereâs hardly any conversation. You halfway pay attention to the Hallmark Christmas rom-com playing on the television as you devour a stack of pancakes and hash browns.
Truthfully, you had hoped to draw Buckyâs name from the hat. You had a gift in mind for him already, and if youâd gotten his name then it would have presented you with the perfect opportunity to give it to him without any pressure for him to give you a gift in return.
You ended up drawing Sharon's name, but you decided to get the present for Bucky, anyway â a vintage tabletop phonograph from the forties that youâd snagged for an incredible deal on eBay. You didnât put it under the gargantuan Christmas tree with all of the other gifts. It sits in your bedroom, waiting for you to give it to him later today when youâre not surrounded by all of your close friends.
To no oneâs surprise, Sam and Peter are the first people to finish eating and immediately begin handing out all of the presents under the tree. Youâre still finishing up your breakfast when Peter practically throws a small box wrapped in snowmen print paper towards you.
It's addressed to you, from your Secret Santa. Right off the bat, youâre sure that the gift didnât come from Natasha â you know how much pride that she puts into gift wrapping. Not that this gift is wrapped poorly, but compared to Natashaâs typically extravagant bows, youâre confident that she wasn't the one who wrapped this present.
You also notice that the handwriting appears to be more on the masculine side. It looks familiar, though you canât say with confidence who it belongs to.
âAlright, who wants to go first?â Sam says loudly enough to quiet all the chatter going on. âNo one would spoil my gift for me and Iâm getting impatient.â
You and Bucky share a knowing glance and eye roll at his words. He sits in a recliner directly across from you, holding the gift from his own Secret Santa.
âIâll go first,â you offer excitedly, giving the box in your lap a small shake that gives nothing away.
You carelessly tear at the wrapping paper until itâs in pieces by your feet on the floor.
âWhatâd you get?â Sam asks.
You donât respond at first, taking in the packaging of the box.
A northern lights projector.
You feel warmth spread across your cheeks and you canât help but smile down at the gift in your hands, no longer having any doubt about who this gift came from.
One Month Ago
âThese Spaghettios expired a couple weeks ago. Do you think we should risk it?â
You stand in the small kitchen of the Alaskan safe house, rifling through the limited options in the pantry. Some instant oatmeal packets, a few cans of Beanee Weenees, and the aforementioned expired Spaghettios are tonightâs dinner choices.
You canât say youâre surprised â youâve been doing this job for a while, and poorly stocked safe houses are pretty much the standard in this line of work. It doesn't help that this is the fifth night that you and Bucky have spent in this particular safe house, and you've eaten through all of the better options at this point.
âIf you want to risk getting food poisoning in addition to that sprained ankle, then you go for it. I'll be sticking to the oatmeal.â Bucky reaches around you, grabbing a packet of maple and brown sugar oatmeal from the shelf that you stand in front of.
He's right. The oatmeal is the safest option.
One more night of this, you remind yourself. Tomorrow night, you'd be back in the comfort of your room, where you can DoorDash Chinese food.
You sigh, grabbing the remaining packet of oatmeal.
âYou know, I wouldn't even mind the food situation nearly as much if I could just see the lights. Five nights here and nothing,â you grumble.
Itâs your first time in Alaska, and you had high hopes for being able to see the northern lights. Each night so far, after long days of recon, youâve stayed up past the point of exhaustion checking to see if theyâre visible.
So far, the weather had been nothing but rainy and dreary, making the sky close to impossible to see at night. The clouds finally let up some today, but you've still seen no hint of an aurora. Just inky blackness, a crescent moon, and a steady downpour of snow that began a few hours ago.
âYou could always get one of those projectors,â he teases with a shrug. âNorthern lights, galaxies, constellations⌠all right there on your bedroom ceiling.â
Even though he wonât say it, you know he wants to see the northern lights as badly as you do. He's made it obvious by the way he glances out the window every so often to check.
Youâve been hoping that theyâd make an appearance for him as much as for yourself. He's technically seen them before â decades ago. But never as himself. Never as Bucky.
âThose are neat,â you agree glumly. âI've just always wanted to see them in person. Kinda a bucket list thing.â
Getting to witness them with him would be the cherry on top, but you donât add that part.
Bucky insists that you sit down on the couch and ice your ankle while he prepares the instant oatmeal for the two of you. Youâre too tired to protest, so you retreat to the sofa and flip through the limited number of channels on the old TV with your foot propped up.
Fucking black ice. The last day of this mission and everything had gone swimmingly up until you slipped on a patch of clear ice earlier today, twisting your ankle.
Youâre just thankful that it happened in front of Bucky, and not Sam. You can only imagine the teasing that would have ensued if it had been Sam that saw you eat shit.
The two of you eat by the warmth of the dwindling fire while watching a Seinfeld re-run.
Youâre over three thousand miles from New York, but it doesnât feel like youâre far from home at all. Bucky and you have been mission partners for quite some time now, and he has a way of making you feel like youâre at home, no matter where youâre actually at. His presence is familiar and comforting â whether youâre at the compound, or in a different country, or in Alaska â the familiarity and comfort of home is there, as long as he is.
âIâm gonna go get some more wood for the fire before bed,â Bucky says when he finishes scarfing down his food. You give him a quick nod, your mouth still crammed full of oatmeal. âYou stay here and try not to sprain anything else,â he teases with a glance at your foot thatâs elevated on the coffee table in front of you.
You shoot him an obscene gesture once his back is to you. âYou act like my leg got cut off,â you grumble as he exits the house.
No more than ten seconds pass before you hear him call your name from beyond the front door. You look over your shoulder with wide eyes and he all but sprints back into the house with an animated expression.
âWhat? What is it?â
âThe lights. Theyâre visible,â he exclaims. He walks over to the couch, taking your bowl from you and sitting it on the end table next to you before you can process whatâs happening. He offers his flesh hand to you in an attempt to help you up.
âHoly shit, really? You better not be messing with me.â You push yourself up off the couch, momentarily forgetting all about your ankle.
âIâm not messing with you,â he snorts. âCome see for yourself.â
Bucky wraps his arm around your waist and you throw yours over his shoulder, helping you walk to the porch without putting too much pressure on your injured foot. You lean into him, his body heat providing a nice reprieve from the night air as you step outside.
You donât pull away, and neither does he.
Side by side, you stare up at the seemingly endless expanse of swirling rivers of blue and green. The auroral rays seem to dance across the sky, electrifying the night with the shimmering veils of color.
âWow,â you whisper in awe. Wow doesnât begin to cover how ethereal the phenomenon is, but youâre at a loss for words. Itâs one of the most beautiful things youâve ever seen.
You're acutely aware of the bitter chill of the cold wind. If it weren't for the fact that Bucky feels like a personal space heater, your teeth would be chattering. But with the view before you, you find it hard to care.
âIâd give anything to be able to see this where we live,â you breathe. You glance up at him to find him already looking at you.
âWouldn't you?â You ask him.
âI really would.â
Present Day
âOooh,â Natasha coos beside you, snapping you out of your memory. âA northern lights projector. I wonder who that could be from.â
You can tell by her tone of voice that she knows exactly who itâs from â even if you hadn't blatantly told her about seeing the northern lights on your mission with Bucky last month, she's too smart to not be able to figure it out herself.
You playfully elbow her in the side, silencing her teasing but the smirk on her face remains.
âThank you, Santa,â you say with a glance at Bucky. âI love it.â
The rest of your friends open their presents one by one. You try your hardest to pay attention, but all you can think about is how perfect you think the gift that Bucky picked out for you is. He could have just given you a gift card, or a generic gag gift, but what he gave you is personal, and sentimental, and thoughtful.
When all of the Christmas morning festivities have come to an end, you retreat back to your bedroom with your presents. Despite getting many great gifts from your friends, the one from your Secret Santa is by far your favorite.
You unbox the projector and set it up on your nightstand before plugging it in. As soon as you press the power button, the ceiling of your room is covered in shades of blue and green that mimic the natural hues of the northern lights that you had witnessed first hand just a month prior.
You flick your light switch off, making it easier to envision yourself standing under the Alaska sky. Of course, thereâs nothing like seeing the real thing, but itâs still pretty, and the meaning behind the gift is what makes you happier than anything.
Smiling to yourself beneath the undulating ribbons of turquoise and emerald, you canât help but replay the memory of standing under the aurora with Bucky.
How he got so excited when he went outside and realized the lights were visible, the contrast of his warm body against the cold night air as he helped you stand on your hurt foot, and the way that he was smiling at you instead of taking in the scene before him â
Your phone chimes from your back pocket, drawing you back to reality.
A projection probably doesnât really compare to the real thing, huh?
You smile at your phone, sitting down on your bed. You think of how you should respond when you remember the present you bought for Bucky that sits in your closet.
Come and see for yourself, you respond.
With his room being just a short distance down the hallway, itâs only a few moments before you hear a soft knock against your door.
âCome in,â you say softly.
Youâre suddenly overcome with a wave of nerves, and you tell yourself itâs because youâre antsy about giving him the present you'd picked out for him.
Bucky eases into the room, closing the door behind him. He takes in the display across your ceiling with his hands shoved in his pockets â a nervous habit of his that youâve noticed many times before, though you canât pinpoint why heâd be nervous right now.
âPretty cool,â he admits. He takes a seat in front of you on the edge of your bed and finally meets your gaze. âCanât say it quite compares to the real thing, but at least itâs a whole lot warmer here.â
âThe food is considerably better here, too,â you joke. âBut really, thank you. Itâs definitely the best Secret Santa gift Iâve ever received,â you add, cringing when you remember the toilet shaped coffee mug that Sam had gotten you two years ago.
You use it regularly, of course. But you like Buckyâs gift far more.
âAnd I got you a present, too,â you add in a small voice before you can chicken out. âI know I wasnât your Secret Santa, so I hope you donât think itâs weird. Itâs okay if you donât likeââ
âCan I tell you something?â He interrupts you. Heâs grinning big â the kind of grin that brings out the lines around his eyes. You snap your mouth shut and answer with a quick nod.
âI wasnât your Secret Santa originally,â he sighs. âNatasha was. But I convinced her to switch names with me.â
âBut whyââ
âI got your present as soon as we got back from Alaska, but then I started overthinking it⌠just thought it would be easier to give it to you if I had the excuse of being your Secret Santa,â he shrugs.
Youâre momentarily stunned. It dawns on you â heâd been worried about the exact thing you had. Youâd been so worried about him being weirded out by you getting him a gift that you waited until you were alone to give it to him, and heâd been so worried about getting you a gift that he convinced someone else to let him have your name in Secret Santa.
How silly of both of you, you think.
He sits by you on your bed, waiting for your response with a patient, albeit uncertain expression. Your eyes flicker from his eyes to his lips.
It had been a fleeting thought when you stared into his eyes under the colorful Alaskan sky â how beautiful it would be to kiss someone under such a serene and mesmerizing sky. How beautiful it would be to kiss him, here. It was a thought that you shoved down, out of fear for crossing a line and making yourself look like an idiot.
It's a thought that is once again at the forefront of your mind, sitting beside him in your bedroom under the imitation aurora.
Under the true northern lights, or under your bedroom ceiling in New York â it doesnât matter. You think kissing him would be beautiful anywhere.
And so you do.
Or he does â youâre not actually sure who leans forward first. But you are sure that he still tastes faintly of maple syrup and coffee from breakfast, and that when he cups your face in his flesh hand and tilts it to give him a better angle to sweep his tongue along your bottom lip, your brain turns to static white noise.
You let him set the pace â itâs slow and soft, like heâs trying to memorize the map that his tongue draws inside your mouth. You place one of your hands on the back of his neck, intertwining your fingers in the short tufts of hair.
Still holding your face in his hand, he pulls away with a gentle tug of your bottom lip between his teeth and looks at you in the blue-green glow of the projectorâs illumination.
âWas that my present?â he smiles, rubbing his thumb across your cheek. You laugh, reeling in the afterglow of the kiss.
You drop your hand from his neck, and hold up a singular finger to him, indicating for him to give you a moment. You walk over to your closet, retrieving the large gift bag containing the phonograph.
When you walk back over to your bed, you turn on your bedside table lamp for a bit more light before handing him the bag.
He smiles, blushing faintly as he pulls the tissue paper out of the gift bag. He eases the package out of the bag slowly, as if heâs scared the contents will break. You watch as he takes his time with the unboxing, now feeling a fresh wave of nervousness at the anticipation of him seeing the gift.
His smile only grows once he realizes what it is.
âMy ma used to have one just like this,â he murmurs in awe. He grabs your hand in his and brings it to his lips, pressing a kiss to your knuckles. âThank you. It's perfect.â
He turns to place it behind him on your mattress before pulling your face to his once more. Itâs shorter than the kiss before, but just as tender and sweet.
âBut just so you know, you could have just given me a kiss, and I wouldâve been just as thrilled.â
â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘
thanks for reading!! i had fun writing this cute little piece âĄ
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky x you#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky x y/n#bucky barnes one shot#bucky barnes oneshot#bucky barnes one-shot#bucky barnes imagine#bucky barnes fluff#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes fic#christmas fic#fluff#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky barnes x fem reader
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Just needed to get this out of my head after Sylus's Myth so i hope you like it :)
TW : drunk MC, fluff, it's sad I guess ? No proof read cause i'm a savage, english is not my mother tongue
â......tail ?âÂ
âWhat did you just say kitten ?â Sylus asked, gently patting the back on your thigh while steadying you on his shoulder as you exited the elevator together, .
At first he had been quite surprised to receive your call.
Even more so when you bluntly asked him if he would be ok playing bodyguard and keep an eye on you while you indulged in a night of carefree debauchery at the club but hey, who was he to judge ?Â
Besides, if you felt safe enough to be in such a vulnerable state around him, going as far as trusting him with your safety and your apartment key to make sure you would make it back safe and sound, he was not going to complain.
âIâŚ.I saidâŚooooh that spinsâŚdoâŚdo you ever miss your tail ?â you repeated, your voice tired and slurred, words barely comprehensive despite your best effort.
Sylus couldnât help the chuckle that came as you poked his lower back through his jacket.
You really were wastedâŚ
But you had a good reason !
Your week has been shitty as hell.
Your nights were even worse lately, barely getting a couple hours of sleep only to wake up either with a sore throat, screaming or crying at something you could not recall.
And, on top of that, you were off duty as Zayne decided you needed a break and refused to sign your abilitation.
âCome on Zayne, look, Iâm fiiiiiiiiineâ you tried to convince him with a huge smile and so much concealer on your face you could open your own makeup shop.
âAs your physician I cannot let you go on field with such resultsâ he retorted not even looking away from your chart âYou should be dead with such a high blood pressureâ
âIâm a tough cookie !â
âAnd youâre going to have to stay in the jar until these get better. Youâre not only a danger for yourself right now but also for your partnerâ
That was a low blow but he had a point.
Clearly, you needed a break, something to unplug your brain, something fun, a good night out to leave all your problems behind and get shitfaced to oblivion. What you did not need though was the unwanted attention a young woman alone at the club would probably get and, while you were very capable of handling those kinds of situations, you did not really want to have to be on the lookout constantly or end up in a cell for assault.
You tried Tara, back to her family for the Holidays.
Simone ? Night shift.
XavierâŚ.doing God knew what God knew whereâŚ.
So, with a heavy heart you picked up your phone and called your secret weaponâŚ
âNot necessary,â Sylus finally answered in a calm, composed voice, as he opened your apartment door, being extra careful as to not bump you in the doorframe. Based on the current humming coming from you right now and your kicking feet, your head was already going to kill you tomorrow.
Better not add âcommotionâ to the list of your impending issues.
âTo be honest, being half human half cat was quite annoyingâ he admitted, walking you toward your bedroom to tuck you into bed. âI donât like not being in control of myself and beside, it was bad for business to be away from the N109 zone for so long...althoughâŚI kind of enjoyed having to hide here and spend time with youâŚâ he added with his signature smirk, poking your side before tossing you onto the bed, making you giggle like an idiot as you plopped on your back. It was the first time you allowed him into your room and, although he did plan on being a gentleman despite what you could think of him when sober, he couldnât help the loving smile on his face as he watched you mumble something about a potato bag while fighting with your plushies for room.
âI miss you tailâ you retorted in your drunk voice, closing your eyes in hopes it would help with the dizziness while Sylus started to remove your shoes and socks.
âI quite remember you telling me how insufferable it wasâ the man said in a collected tone while making his way to the kitchen once he was done.Â
âYeah but it was sooooo prettyâŚI miss how you used it to grab me with it andâŚand toss me around ! That was funny !â you laughed, mimicking being tossed around like a ragdoll in the middle of your plushies as Sylus was coming back in your room, a glass of water in his hand.
He stopped in his tracks, a puzzled look on his face.
âI never use my cat tail to...toss you aroundâ he corrected. His Evol, yeah, on a daily basis at some point actually, just to annoy you and enjoy those little lovely sounds coming from your mouth, threats mostly.
He had not been able to use it at all during the time those damn kittens from Hell had turned him into one of them though.
Your foggy brain did not hear him though and just kept mumbling in your drunken state, propping yourself on your elbows, trying to focus your gaze on him.
âYou would think scales are cold and harshâŚâ you started, raising a finger to look all serious before falling back onto your pillow, not registering the look of surprise on his usually steady face.
âKitten whâŚâ his voice was faltering as he looked at you getting all comfy like you had not just shaken his world upside down with your words.
â...but it was sooooo soft and sooooo warmâŚâ you continued, grabbing your pillow to hold on tight as if you were looking for said warmth.Â
Your voice was starting to fade as sleep was settling in.
â...felt safe when you wrapped it around meâŚI kept holding mine to sleep afterâŚbutâŚâ
The glass in his hand fell to the ground, shattering as he froze in place, eyes wide open in shock.Â
ââŚit was notâŚnot the sameâŚâ you mumbled before losing consciousness, your body going limp against your pillow, before starting to snore.
______________________________________________________________ Pssssst, you liked it ? P2 is already up here :) https://www.tumblr.com/cordidy/770227784125677568/a-few-days-ago-i-wrote-this?source=share
#sylus x mc#l&ds sylus#lnds sylus#sylus x reader#l&ds sylus x reader#lads sylus#love and deepspace sylus#love and deepspace#lads fanfic#sylus fluff#sylus angst
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Could you please write a mr scarletta x afab reader smut đđź high key based on all the art of his umbrella being his member or it brings him pleasure when rubbed. Maybe where reader is riding the curved handle of rubbing it between her legs 𫣠if not thank you for taking your time to even just read this!
UMBRELLA
a Mr. Scarletella x afab!reader fic. {an: ooo when i tell you i think about this NIGHTLY}
warnings || misuse of an umbrella, humping, riding an inanimate object, public {for Mr. Scarletella}, afab reader, smut, indirect sexďżź
he always made sure you had it- his umbrella. it was his entire heart and soul, literally him as a being. he trusted you enough- enough that he would leave you with it at all times. he could feel every touch from it, every time your fingers grazed the mesh. you were his human, and he would do anything to mark you as his. regardless if you gave him your name or not.
honestly, you never realized how much it really affected him. you thought all the times he would flinch as you opened the umbrella was just him being, well, him. the way his face would flush and eyes would widen as your hand held the handle, seemed normal to you. though, the more you thought about it, it all started to make sense. Mr. Scarletella was known to be weird and unsettling, but you didn't mind too much. he scared off any creatures that posed a threat to you, plus he was kinda hot-... in his own, creepy way.
it was late at night, or so you assumed- there really wasn't any way to tell time here.. but as you grew restless, tossing and turning on the makeshift bed you had, an idea came to mind. though it was rather risky,, and rather lewd, you couldn't help it. there was really no action here, and all this built up sexual tension definitely didn't help.
your eyes glare daggers at the umbrella that was perched next to your bed. a long stare at that. your thoughts kept debating whether to take the risk or not, until you finally sighed and grabbed it.
he was busy at the time, doing who knows what, but his actions paused when he felt your hands on him- his umbrella. you're supposed to be sleeping, why are you awake? his eyes narrow but he decides to carry on with whatever he was doing.
you on the other hand, were too busy shimmying off your small red panties, still debating your life choices as you rub your fingers down to your entrance, lubing your whole pussy up before shifting in a sitting position, umbrella underneath you. the stick of it was long, and slightly thick. there was a curve at the end for the handle. sighing softly, you lower your cunt on the stick part of it, rubbing your clit on the long pole. your breath instinctively hitches, a hushed whine leaving your lips. your hips move faster and faster, eyes clenching shut.
his heartbeat speed up, so fast he could hear it. his back hits the wall near him and his face turns red, hand coming up to cover his mouth. eyes still wide and staring off into space, his legs slightly trembling as he stays pressed against the wall.
oh.. so thats what you're doing..
meanwhile, your small moans grew heavier, pussy lubing up the pole and making it slide easier. one hand was places on the mesh of the umbrella, while the other was on the side of it, keeping you held up. your cunt was so desperately humping it, seeking as much friction as it could. unfortunately, it wasn't enough.
when he feels the pressure be pulled off, he sighs, having a hard time catching his breath as he processes what just happened. his boner was noticeable even through his raincoat, so prominent that it was impossible to cover. his eyes clench shut and he lets out a shaky breath, attempting to catch himself, his eyes widen with shock and a loud groan suddenly escapes him as he feels you actually slip onto the handle of the umbrella. his fucking cock. he drops to his knees and clenches his stomach, eyes wide and a grin that stretches ear to ear. his teeth sunk into his lip, blood seeping out. shaky breaths and whines spill from him, hair somewhat covering his face as his eyes stare off. you were gonna be the death of him.
your breath hitches and you let out a loud, pleased moan, the handle of the umbrella hitting just the right spot so deep inside of you that you almost came as soon as you started. you couldn't get enough, both your insides and clit were being stimulated from your frantic riding. your hips shuttered, moving at an impossible pace, head thrown back and mewls slipping freely from your lips. you needed it so bad, wanted to cum so desperately that you didn't care how you got it. nor did you care that you were riding a fucking umbrella.
the handle hits a perfect peak. your eyes roll back so far into your skull and you let out one last loud moan, hips sputtering and an orgasm crashing though you. the handle was still deep inside, a bit of drool sliding down your chin. your eyes dart down at the sight- a messy umbrella covered in both your juices and orgasm, but also.. semen?
oh shit.
embarrassment covers your face, realizing your mistake. you hopelessly forgot that his umbrella was practically him as a being, and you just rode it, let alone came on it. you slowly pull it out of you, an unwilling whimper leaving your lips at the feeling.
how could you possibly get out of this one..?
{ made by @whokilledsamara }
#smut#homicipher#homicipher x reader#afab reader#mr. scarletella#mr scarletella#mr scarletta#mr. scarletella x you#mr. scarletella x reader#mr. scarletella x y/n#misuse of an object#misuse
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thinking abt prof!Bucky eating you out in his little office...
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader
Warning: 18+, smut
âË âżď¸ľâżď¸ľâżď¸ľŕ¨ŕ§ ¡ ¡ ⥠¡ ¡ ŕ¨ŕ§âżď¸ľâżď¸ľâżď¸ľ Ëâ
you had been on his mind for the whole entire day, the hunger inside him so irritating that he had no other chance to break your little rule of not doing anything in public.
now down on his knees and between your thighs, heâs messy being and heâs being sloppy â heâs got your slick running down his chin as he fucks you with his tongue, and his glasses keep fogging up from the way he keeps burying his face into your warm cunt. heâs like a starved beast, devouring you as if youâre the last meal heâll ever get to eat.Â
with your free hand, you tug at his roots and it only makes things worse for you because the action makes bucky groan into you and the vibrations that sends all over your body are so intense that your eyes go cross.Â
voices coming from the hallway fall deaf to your ears, your mind solely set on your sweet professorâs tongue. he moves his whole head, not just the muscle, and soon enough youâre guiding him just the way you like with the hand in his hair.
you canât keep your hips still either, grinding into him every time you push him against you. and he lets you do it. he lets you do it all.Â
Bucky isnât ashamed to get on his knees, nor is he ashamed to let you use him for your own pleasure â despite the fact that it was his aching cock that got the two of you into his situation, heâs more than willing to forget about his own needs as long as he knows that youâre feeling good.Â
he loves the way your brows furrow and he loves the way your chest rises and falls. he loves to watch beads of sweat form on your forehead and he loves to watch you try and muffle your moans. he loves the way your body keeps on twitching and he loves the way you keep clenching around him. and he fucking loves the way you taste.
his cock throbs under the layers of clothing, just begging to be set free but Bucky refuses to take his hands off of you.
heâd rather suffer from actual blue balls than to give you any less attention than you deserve. his boxers are ruined with his pre-cum, his balls full and heavy, as he gets off on the mere sight of you. he reckons heâs never been this fucking hard before, better yet this close to cumming untouched, and heâs sure youâve actually bewitched him. not that heâs complaining though.Â
you make him feel alive.
hell, he'd go to fucking war for your pretty little smile. when you give his roots a particularly rough tug, he knows you're close. so, he lets go of one of your thighs and brings it to your pussy instead; latching his lips around your sensitive clit, he sucks on the nub while lining up his two digits with your weeping hole.
the face you make when he pushes them in is fucking priceless - your lips part in a silent moan, your eyes screwing themselves shut as you approach your high.
using his middle and ring finger, the professor makes a wave-like motion inside you and suddenly there's a weird type of pressure building inside you, making your eyes shoot wide open again.
"ah! fuck- wait!" your broken whines are like music to his ears. "gonna- gonna make a mess!"
you paw at his head in a weak attempt of making him back away but to no avail, if anything he presses himself even closer - his fingers are so deep that they're touching places you didn't even know about and his lips are so soft and his tongue so warm and skilled and the band in your tummy gets tighter and tighter with every passing second.
Bucky takes his mouth off of you for only a fraction of a second. "make a mess then, doll, c'mon."
your glassy eyes meet his dark, lust-filled green ones and the determination pooling in them is the last push you need to finally unravel. your back arches off the chair and you can't hold back the loud moan that forces its way out from the depths of your lungs.
Buckyâs shirt gets completely soaked when you squirt all over him but he doesn't stop. the liquid seeps through the flimsy material and he can feel it on his skin, and fuck, is it hot.
a tear runs over the apple of your cheek and Bucky itches to kiss it away. your lip wobbles as you writhe in utter bliss, mind all hazy from the overstimulation.
as the wave of pleasure flows through you, the exhaustion finally settles in, making you drop your hand from his hair.
but before it can go any further, Bucky takes it into his. with his arm still under your thigh, he just presses it into your side and just keeps it there.
he helps you ride out your orgasm and the thought of not stopping, of going further, floods his brain - he wants to make you do that again, he wants you to make an even bigger mess but the clock on the wall behind you is clicking awfully close to his next class and he can't put either of you at any more risk.
hesitantly, he pulls his fingers out of you and tears his eyes from you to look at your abused hole. he groans at the sight of it and then he's already leaning forward to get one final taste. swallowing a whimper, you do your utmost best to stay still and to let him have his little reward.
he pushes himself off the ground, grinning from ear-to-ear with pride blooming in his chest as he looks at your disheveled form. biting your lip, you reach for him but are barely able to ghost your fingers over his bulge when he's stopping you.
"no, but...?"
Buckyâs lips smash against yours in a sloppy, haste kiss. and then he's pulling away again.
"Y'gonna suck me off while i give class, hm?" he teases while brushing some damp stray hairs from your forehead.
"i would."
Buckyâs heart stutters - no, it fucking stops working for a few good seconds. he stares at you with his lips parted and you get to watch in real time how the tips of his ears grow red again.
"don't- don't fuckin' say that." he grumbles at you, averting his gaze. "shit."
you laugh at his reaction but don't let him go away too far, tugging on his belt loops to bring him back. "yours or mine, professor?"
"mine, hm? i'll make ya something to eat."
cocking a brow you tease him a bit more, unable to let any of the opportunities go to waste. "like real food or...?"
he gives you a real professor-like look and you boop his nose. he lets you do as you wish but then he's wrapping his fingers around your wrist. "real food."
"okay."
"yeah?"
"yeah."
there's a moment of silence between you. the most comfortable kind. neither of you look away from each other's eyes, smitten and a bit giddy. excited.
"go change your shirt now, mister."
you poke a finger at his chest and almost cringe at the big wet stain you've given him. "wait, do you just have a change of clothes here with you?"
"no."
you cock a brow. "no?"
"Tony- i mean, mr. Stark, will bring me something."
"what the hell will you even tell him?"
"spilled my water." Buckyâs voice is calm as ever, deep and raspy, and all you want to do now after he's been so good to you, is to cuddle with him. "don't worry about it, doll, yeah?*
with a nod and a quiet hum, you comply. he leans to give you another kiss and an ass squeeze and then he's bidding you goodbye with a smug grin as you straighten out your clothes and collect your belongings before making your way out of his office.
you give him one last wave and disappear into the hallway, leaving Bucky standing there with a raging boner and a squirt-stained shirt.
he is not complaining.
#bucky barnes#bucky barnes angst#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes fluff#blurb#smut#bucky barnes x female!reader#bucky barnes smut#sebastian stan x reader#sebastian stan#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x reader#marvel#marvel smut
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I'm battling demons (a fever) right now and am completely (no ibuprofen) unarmed.
#ibuprofen#is ibuprofenposting a thing#this fever has had its epic highs and lows#98.6-101.7#those were the ones I have been awake and mobile enough to measure#rn it's 100 even#I got zero hours of sleep last night and like five this night#when I finally tempted by body into REM sleep I dreamed of the most brilliant colours#it was so pretty that I couldn't feel the pressure behind my eyes and that I didn't mind the feeling that I was drifting away from my body
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Got Me Snoring
A/N: One of my favorite things inspired by all the Ghost/KĂśnig cosplayer TikToks using that one, song audio. Summary: Ghost admits getting head is boring. Reader isn't happy with that idea and goes about changing his mind. T/W: NS/FW 18+ Only, blowjobs, deepthroating, size kink if you squint, spit?, cursing, aggressive tension?, taunting, not proofread, and it's been a long ass time since I've written full-on smut.
âAll Iâm sayinâ is that if she calls again, Iâm not about to answer.â Soapâs voice carried from the living space of the hotel room to the kitchenette where you stood microwaving some rice from a convenience store down the street.
After-mission talk always leads to the most strange conversations. Maybe the adrenaline or the high of getting almost killed got everyone in a talking mood. However as the Captain slid behind you to go grab more ice outside in the hallway, you couldnât help but shoot him a questioning look. Theyâd been talking about their previous accomplishments and failures in the bedroom for nearly twenty minutes, and thankfully theyâd not roped you into the ridiculous conversation but with the Captain leaving out of the room, it drew their eyesight right to you standing patiently for your instant rice to finish cooking.
âWhat about you, huh?â Gaz was the one to poke a little. âHave any horror stories from the bedroom?â His eyebrows raised in mischievous curiosity as all three men sat staring at you with great intent.
âIâve faked it plenty of times.â You reply offhandedly, waving a hand at them and going back to staring at the small plastic cup rotating around in the microwave.
You overheard the men pass through the moment of silence with low laughs, most noticeably, Ghost. Whoâd apparently found something very funny and decided to grace everyone with the sound of deep and resounding chuckles. With a gloved hand, you take out your food and rejoin them in the room, finding a spot on the corner of one of the beds and crossing your legs to hold the bowl while you watch and listen to more of their recounted stories.
Soap complained more about the one night heâd met up with one of the most beautiful women heâd ever met, and drank himself into oblivion to try and ease his nerves. The only problem was, that when he finally had enough liquid courage to make a move, he couldnât get it up. Even watching him recount the tale now, you could see his embarrassment. You couldnât imagine just how beautiful that woman had to be for Soap to give himself whiskey-dick so bad that to this day he regretted the memory and undoubtedly wished he could take it back. Gaz got pressured into retelling the story of the woman he met in Russia just for you since youâd never heard it; Detailing just how sheâd been absolutely obsessed with him right from the get-go.
She couldnât stop fawning over his accent and just how downright good-looking he was. Gaz on the other hand felt very embarrassed and never really tried to take things further on that trip. Fortunately for him, on a trip back a few months later for pleasure, he ran into the woman again and this time around she wasnât going to take no for an answer. Soap and Ghost laughed, poking fun at how utterly exhausted Garrick was when he met up with them in London. His shit-eating grin was more than enough for them to surmise that his little Russian vixen had taken him for a hell of a ride.
Then there was Ghost.
He didnât have much to say in the way of his own successes, but did share one or two small comparisons with the other two as they kept pulling out detail after detail about the many people theyâd met over the years and how they either felt theyâd left their mark⌠or totally fucking missed it. All of it came to a very interesting topic that you suddenly became very interested in when Ghost uttered one single statement that left your mouth hanging open and staring at him almost in disbelief.
âI donât like someone blowinâ my cock,â his voice sounded flat. Totally unbothered and nearly sleeping at the idea. âNever cared much for it when half doesnât fit.â
You couldnât help but insert yourself into the conversation after a long hour or so of sitting like a viewer at a movie. âWait a second⌠You mean to tell me you donât like getting head because you're too big?â The gasp in your tone was obvious, and even Soap and Gaz looked at him a little strangely as if they didnât truly believe the idea either. It gave you a bit more reassurance in your belief that almost all men enjoyed it. Sure, there was the odd chance that Ghost just didnât like it at all, but you really wanted to hear his explanation if heâd give you one.
The Lieutenant turned to look at you and nodded stiffly. âYeah, âbout always puts me to sleep.â
It was at this point you felt the slightest urge to tell him heâd never had someone give him a legitimately good blowjob before. But before you could even say something to the contrary, a thought crossed your mind. Ghost didnât seem like the kind of man who attracted ill-experienced women. Especially when he had already proven throughout the evening that his previous encounters were much more interesting and expansive than even that of yourself. Something a bit⌠jealous rose inside of you at the thought.
Imagining your Lieutenant laying on his back and hardly making any sort of sound while someone pulls out every single trick in their arsenal to make a blowjob somewhat entertaining or arousing. You didnât necessarily profess yourself to have a crush on Ghost, due to just how grey the line between operators and anything felt when you spent so much time together under high-stress environments. There was bound to be some level of emotional attachment that devolved pastâŚÂ professional. And for whatever it was, knowing that Ghost had such a bad opinion on the receiving end of pleasure became a challenge you wanted to overcome.
About that time, Price returned with half-melted ice and a half-smoked cigar hanging between his lips.
âFinished talking about chasinâ tail yet?â He grumbled, walking past the group of you still sitting around each other like a bunch of kids getting caught staying up late by Dad at a sleepover. âWanna go to fuckinâ sleep.â
He dropped the ice bucket down on the dresser with a little thud before settling himself down on the pull-out couch with his hat covering his eyes and both arms resting behind his head with that cigar still puffing smoke rings into the air. Ghost was the first to stand up, making his way out of the hotel room without as much as a comment about when heâd be back or where he was going. Your eyes trailed over his shoulders tapering into a slim waist before giving way again to thick and muscular thighs enhanced by all of gear still strapped to his body. His kit did leave a lot to the imagination. And god did your mind start to wander as both Soap and Gaz began winding down, settling themselves down to sleep for the night or at least lay somewhere quietly so the Captain didnât lose any more of his patience and kick someone out or force them to pay for their own room. Not nearly tired enough with all of the questions and thoughts about Ghost now floating through your mind, you didnât care the least bit about laying down or pretending not to care about the fact of the matter and headed out of the hotel room after the Lieutenant as Soap turned out the final lamp in the corner of the room.
The air was a bit cold outside without your jacket, breath materializing in front of you in light wisps of fog with every exhale as you looked down both ends of the hallway hoping to see some sign of where Ghost mightâve gone to. Down on the far left side, a larger cloud of smoke blew past the breezeway entrance and you knew right away that Ghost would be at the end of it. And when your eyes peeked around the corner, you werenât the least bit surprised to see him with a shoulder resting up against the wall; his back to you with enough of his mask pulled up so that he could smoke a cigarette. The sweet vanilla and cherry smell hit you like a wall, reminding you that Ghost preferred rolling his own cigarettes and used pipe tobacco instead of buying packs of anything else.
Leaves no trace behindâŚÂ Heâd explained without prompting one night after noticing that youâd been watching him.
âFollowinâ me now?â His voice heavy with smoke and unhindered by his mask landed directly on you, not even needing to turn around to know you were the one tailing after him.
âCouldnât let you freeze to death alone.â You reply with a little smile, taking it as your chance to go ahead and walk -slowly- over to him giving him the privacy to smoke without needing to fuss with keeping his face covered.
By standing just at his back leaning against the wall, he knew right where you were, and it put the weight of conversation on him for the moment. He gave you a gruff sort of sound and took another drag off his cigarette before turning just far enough to offer it to you. You take it from his gloved fingers carefully, licking your lips a little in slight nervousness. This wasnât the first time heâd offered you a hit, but it was the first time youâd ever actually taken him up on it. Seeing the damp rolling paper on the end made you shiver a little; Hopefully, the cold weather would be a good enough excuse to keep him from recognizing your sudden anxiety around him. Wrapping your lips around it and inhaling, youâre a little more than guilty for noticing the taste of Ghost instead of the vanilla and cherry. With a quick glance to your side, you saw his mask was pulled back down over his mouth and his dark eyes were focused right on you as you blew the smoke out of your mouth and back in through your nose. Attempting to hand it back, he just shakes his head.
âYou didnât come out here to be cold,â He finally broke the silence. âWhatâd you really want from me?â
No matter how long you spent around Ghost, you never got used to just how miserably direct Ghost could be. Like nothing was truly surprising to him or worth being the least bit delicate over. Even if it concerned someone -like yourself- at least attempting to be a little more discretionary. Yet you sighed and took another drag before tossing the rest of it down on the concrete, putting out the ember with the toe of your boot.
âWere you lying earlier?â Your question falls a little short of confident, giving Ghost the impression right away that you were nervous. For a split second, you thought you saw the phantom of a smile under the cover of his mask before it was quickly hidden back under late-night shadow and white paint. Ghost put his hands in the pockets of his sweatshirt and gave a sigh, making more fog swirl around and through the woven material around his mouth. Another thought of what his mouth looked like flashed through your failing mind.
âWhy would it matter?â
You licked at your bottom lip, trying to figure out a way to word this without sounding desperate or downright shameless in front of your commanding officer⌠you shouldn't be thinking about doing this in the first place. So many more bad outcomes could come of this than the one good one. Even then, it was risky. Leaving you a bit dazed and staring at Ghost.
âAsked you a question. Iâm expectinâ an answer.â He pressed forward, a slight swagger in his hips as he got closer to you, resting a hand on the wall and tilting his head a little to the side. Damn near mocking you for being so much smaller and easily intimidated. You look down at your boots for a moment, deciding to just put your money where your mouth is and take the hit no matter the outcome.
âIf you werenât lyingâŚâ You look up, internally screaming at how heavy his eyes look down on you. âIâd like to try and change your mind.â
A deep chuckle comes from the Lieutenant in response followed by his heavy hand resting on your shoulder, almost totally engulfing it.
âYouâre jokinâ,â His voice lowered with humor that made you almost shrivel up and die inside. âWhy would I let you do that?â You give a frustrated sigh and take a step back away from Ghost. Mentally and physically distancing yourself from the slight Ghost had given you by accident or otherwise.
âNever mind.â You give a short nod and turn on your heel to head back to the hotel room and find somewhere to curl up on the floor or in a bed with someone and try to sleep off your damaged ego.
Yet five steps away from Ghost, youâre stopped short with his arm snaked around your waist tightly and his mouth resting against your ear with a heavy and hot breath fanning against your neck. His palm spreads over your stomach and squeezes almost aggressively at the soft flesh under your shirt. Tall and wide, Ghost yanks your back flush to his chest as a silent threat.
âDonât fuckinâ walk away from me,â His low growl makes you shiver. âIâm not finished with ya.â
In an instant, youâre spun around and hauled aggressively with your back against the nearest wall with Ghostâs chest holding you from fighting back. His legs limit your ability to try and escape out from under his arms, and while one hand is flat against your chest, the other restricts both your wrists above your head. Breath evacuates your lungs with the sudden shock of your back against the wall, but your eyes are locked on Ghostâs as he glares at you harshly through the wavering mist of his breath in the cold air.
âNow Iâve got you pacifiedâŚâ His smirk was clear in tone, outright mocking you by pressing those massive thighs tighter against yours. âLetâs continue shall we?â The gloved hand pressed against your heaving chest slides up to grasp firmly at your chin and jerk it up to look him in the eyes.
âWhy donât you be a good little thing and tell me why you think you could change my mind, and maybe⌠I wonât punish you for talkinâ shit to your superior officer.â He spat loudly, his face less than an inch from yours, eyes flaming with aggression.
âSorry LieutenantâŚâ You mutter stiffly through the struggle of his hand against your jaw. âThought I could do better.â You add a lot weaker, averting your eyes as far from Ghost as you can.
âWhat was that?â He made dark fun of you, terribly obvious, and downright happy with himself. âSay it again.â
You squirm in his grasp, only to get your wrists slid up higher on the wall and a thigh shoved between your own to lift your feet almost totally off the ground. Toes tapping the ground, Ghost holds you totally of his own power without the slightest effort needed to keep you held right where he wanted you to be.
âThought I could do better.â You repeat yourself louder, and more clearly, feeling utterly stupid for enduring such pathetic treatment. Only you knew it was your fault for letting such a pipe dream of an idea come to reality by prodding Ghost about his sex life so confidently. The masked man hummed lowly, tilting his head as he inspected your face lighted only by a small sliver of moonlight creeping around the corner of the hallway.
âBetter, huh?â Ghost chuckles darkly, this thumb tracing over the bottom curve of your lip carefully. âThatâs a lot of confidence for someone so small.â
You canât help but roll your eyes. âSize has nothing to do with it.â
Ghost barks laughter, grumbling something under his breath before dropping his hand away from your jaw and releasing one of your hands to press against his groin. You canât miss his meaning from the massive erection pressing back against your hand and twitching impatiently when your Lieutenant squeezes your hand around it tighter. A growl escapes his throat and he looks up at you with almost evil eyes.
âStill think size doesnât matter, little one?â He questions, one eyebrow raising above the hemline of his mask.
Your mouth falls open in shock. Not only because of the sheer girth of Ghostâs cock pulsing in your hand but realizing that he was actually taking your proposal seriously no matter how aggressive his mockery of you was. It shouldnât have been so damn surprising when taking into account just how large of a man Ghost is. Surely everything would be proportionate, and his erection was proof of it.
Your face is enough to make Ghost chuckle. âThatâs what I thoughtâŚâ
Itâs enough of a dismissal that thaws your speechlessness and throws you right back into the present with enough of the guts to speak up for your own desires.
âI can do it,â You blurt breathlessly, fingers tracing along the curve of Ghostâs dick and earning a lusty growl from him. âI can make it good. Iâll make it fit.â You nod your head feverishly in an attempt to keep your chance open. Ghostâs eyes widen at your desperation and his cock twitches hard in your palm with the sound of your shallow breaths and pleading eyes.
âYou want it, huh?â He questions, mask moving like heâs grinning under it.
âThen get on your fuckinâ knees.â
The moment his hands release you, you feel yourself sliding down the wall until your knees make a bruising thud against the concrete floor in front of Ghost. Your hands holding on his thighs without the slightest care that you were standing in the middle of a hotel breezeway where anyone could see you. A weight settled in your lower stomach with the idea of anyone coming out of their room and witnessing such a sight.
âMy belt.â Ghost instructs a bit pinched, looking down at you with his chin almost touching his chest.
Youâre frantic yet shaking as your hands slide up his thighs and begin pulling his belt loose, hearing that metallic clink as you pull the two sides apart with a watering mouth. No instruction is necessary for you to know where to go next, and as you unbutton his cargo pants, your free hand palms his cock as you pull down just enough of his waistband to expose him but not make him cold. Ghostâs hands help just a little, settling extra material where he prefers it, almost patiently holding up his own hoodie and t-shirt out of your way as you slid your hands under his boxers.
âFuckâŚâ Ghost mutters quietly, tensing when your fingers wrap around his base and free him from his underwear.
Your thumb smears over his swollen head soft enough to not make him jerk away with sensitivity, and you lick your lips at just how wet his cock already is from sheer anticipation. Hell, you were turned on too, practically dripping in your underwear at the sight of Ghost with nothing but a perfect dick exposed and ready for your mouth. The first lick is a teasing one. Flattening it over his head just because you couldnât wait to taste him, gathering up his arousal, and making it a point to swallow with your eyes locked right on Ghostâs. You're certain itâs enough to affect him just by the way he grunts and rests both of his hands against the wall behind you to steady himself.
When your lips wrap around his tip and slide down towards his base slowly, you hollow your lips and suck hard. Almost mimicking drinking through a straw with both hands wrapped around his thick base to restrict blood flow, adding to his sensitivity. You feel his feet flex in his boots next to your thighs and another low grunt. It spurs you forward, sinking down further and massaging your tongue on the underside before raising back up to lick at his frenulum and repeating the process with quiet whines each time heâs unable to hold back some sound.
âShit-â He hisses after no more than a couple of minutes, jerking his hips back away from you and moving your hands out of the way so he could tighten his own fist around his cock with a heaving chest.
He stays like that for a few moments, undoubtedly trying to stave off the pleasure youâd been giving before his eyes meet yours again and theyâre downright hungry and raging with fury that youâd brought him so close without any extra fancy moves or those fake moans that porn always showed. With one quick movement, he stepped closer and tilted your head back until it gently rested against the wall behind you, his cock smearing your own spit and his arousal over your open and awaiting mouth.
âYou look pretty like thisâŚâ He muttered, rubbing his length over your face and tapping it teasingly against your mouth. âYou hungry for more?â Youâre sticking out your tongue and nodding right away, earning you a tense chuckle and the feeling of Ghostâs dick sliding into your mouth while his hand cushions the back of your head from the wall.
âLet me feed it to ya,â He grunts. âShove my fat cock in your mouth and fuck your throat..â He adds with a feral sort of sound mixing with an ever-thickening accent.
You moan around his length, feeling your jaw muscles begin to start aching when your nose just barely grazes his pubic bone and his tip touches the back of your throat. Heâs thick enough to qualify as the largest youâve ever experienced, but youâre not the slightest bit concerned about whether heâll be able to fit. You know heâll make it fit if nothing else.
And him utterly pounding your throat sounded so hot that you tried pushing further down on his shaft yourself. Eager to feel Ghost as deep in you as possible. Ghost obliges you, and rocks his hips forward slowly, easing his thick head past that ring of pressure at the back of your throat and cursing under his breath when a wet, gurgling sound vibrates around his shaft as you begin swallowing around him.
âBloody, fuucckk yesâŚâ His groans punch through the quiet air, far louder than he should be risking in such a public space. But heâs only getting started with this experience as your nose presses against his pubic bone, and his hand flattens against the wall.
âSo tight⌠dogginâ me right where anyone can see.â
Itâs the thought that had you so eager, and right away you felt just how much it turned Ghost on too. Because the second he said it, he pulled back just a fraction and pushed himself back down your throat, beginning tight and quick thrusts that made your eyes roll back. He kept a furious pace, growling and holding tight to the back of your head until you tapped at the back of his thigh a few times, and he pulled out with a loud grunt, giving you a moment to breathe. You panted, seeing a thick web of spit connecting your mouth and his tip before watching it break and drip down your shirt.
Youâre about to tell Ghost⌠something. But you instantly lose thought of it when heâs bent down with his mask rucked up just far enough to smash his mouth to yours, shoving his tongue in your mouth and practically eating you from the inside out. You can still taste the salty edge of his skin, and itâs almost heady to have his mouth mingling with yours and sharing his arousal between soft moans and heavy breaths. The kiss is long and feverish, but not near long enough before heâs standing back up and stroking his fist up and down his cock right in front of you like an unreal kind of dream somehow coming to life.
âPlease.â You mutter a bit hoarse from the rough treatment of your throat, totally unsure of what you really want most. Between his mouth, words, and dick thereâs so much more than just one you desired, but at least one of them needed to be delivered to you to attempt satisfaction.
âOpen up, little oneâŚâ Ghost whispers face re-masked already, and it makes you whine pathetically, having naively believed heâd allow you just one glimpse at the mouth youâd just tasted. âNeed to have more of you.â Youâre totally happy to resign by leaning your head back against the wall with your tongue wetting your lips in the cold air.
Ghost starts painfully slow, holding your head on both sides of your jaw and teasing his head against your tongue and the textured roof of your mouth; indiscernible words falling from his mouth and his eyes squeezed tightly shut. You wouldâve thought it was nothing more than your Lieutenant just taking his pleasure as offered. But the way his thumbs brushed over your cheeks and his fingers would occasionally rub over the stretched muscles in your jaw gave you the feeling that he was well aware of what you were surrendering to him. As well as how thankful he was to have you on your knees, and looking so fucking angelic swallowing and spitting on his dick like a dirty little whore.
âLet me - WannaâŚâ His rising breaths and steady strokes begin to falter the longer he thrusts inside your mouth, meticulously avoiding forcing himself deeper in disappointment; resulting in your whining and muffled complaints and pleasure. Had his hands not been purposefully holding you back to prolong the session, Ghost probably wouldnât have lasted this long.
âP-patienceâŚâ His stammer made your chest clench in satisfaction. âDonât - donât wanna finish in your mouthâŚâ. That breathy comment nearly struck you stiff as concrete.
You couldnât believe that after this entire ordeal, Ghost was actually trying to end a blowjob without you finishing it the way you honestly believed it should always end. With you swallowing every last fucking drop that the Lieutenant gave you; wearing a goddamn smile bigger than anyone has ever seen. If he hadnât been lying and head never impressed him, there wasnât a chance in Hell you were going to let him finish anywhere that wasnât down your throat. In a split second, you were shaking your head no and pulling back off his cock with a slight gasp.
âNo, finish.â Itâs the most demanding and certain youâve sounded all night. âFinish in my mouth, Ghost.â
His eyes say it all.
Theyâre wide with his pupils blown at impressive dimensions and his thick eyelashes flutter as his shocked expression forces him to blink over and over again to make sense of you. Mouth and chin covered in spit, on your knees, and literally begging him to come in your mouth.
âGoddamn, youâre so fucking filthyâŚâ He mutters aloud, watching intently as you slide back down over him one more time and begin doing what you wanted to from the very beginning.
Bring Ghost to his knees.
Itâs a moment before you have him cursing and holding onto the wall with both hands again as you push deeper and deeper until you're teasing the tip of your nose against him yet again. Unwilling to let him pull you off this time or prolong this. Deserving this release was the bare minimum. Not only did you want to provide him ultimate pleasure where no one else had, but you enjoyed every single bit of it. You needed this as much -if not more- than Ghost.
Heavy and twitching in your mouth, Ghost was teetering on the edge of his orgasm with stuttering hips and one hand sliding down to rest on your head. Not pushing this time, just laying at the crown like your movements were too much to feel with only one part of his body. Short pants were cut short by unintelligible words and strained attempts to say what you already knew.
As if giving your final approval of the idea Ghost had found unacceptable, you push him as deep as you could one final time; Hearing his loud shout echo down the breezeway as both of his hands grabbed harshly onto the sides of your head. Pumping stream after stream of his hot release down your throat you moaned deeply, feeling him gently rock his hips against your face as he rode down his high on shaky legs. You gagged a little as he pulled out, feeling your throat begin to burn in an unfamiliar way that had never followed you sharing a moment like this with another man. Only one look at Ghostâs cock right in front of your face was more than enough to reassure you heâd just been the one who gave you enough of a delicious stretch to feel for days to come.
Your eyes met his and a small little shy smile crossed your sore lips, contrasting the absolutely deplorable -and punishable- act youâd ever committed with a superior officer. Wordlessly Ghost tucked himself back into his underwear and neglected to button his pants back up before dropping to a knee right in front of you and pulling up his mask again to brush his lips against yours.
âWant to taste,â He whispered ever-so-softly, hands holding your head gently.
âNeed to taste me inside your mouth.â He added, licking your lips before closing the distance between you for a second time. This kiss was still intense. Ghost controlling the pace and just how much dominance you had, which nearly came to zero when he licked into your mouth, groaning shamelessly. He could taste his release coating your mouth as he utterly overwhelmed you with kisses, licks, bites, and more moans that fell like honey on your ears.
You were the first to pull back for a gasp of air youâd gone full minutes without, feeling your own mouth and body beginning to feel a little weak with exhaustion not typical of a well-conditioned soldier like yourself. Your Lieutenant took note right away and rested his head against yours reassuringly, his nose touching yours.
âYouâre too cold to be out here like this.â He whispered, pulling your cheek affectionately and wrapping the other arm around you. âNot gonna let you freeze after that.â He chuckled a bit sluggishly, kissing you again long and chaste.
He pulled his mask back down and gave very little effort to pick you up off your knees and into his arms without question or hesitation. Leaving you feeling like a treasured prize heâd won and refused to let out of his sight for more than a moment. Safe and protected, you couldnât care one bit about the cold nipping through your thin clothes and resting your head against Ghostâs shoulder as he carried you back to the hotel room the 141 had already retired for the night in.
Expertly avoiding Soap and Gaz laying on couch cushions on the floor and covered with extra bedsheets, sliding around Priceâs bed without bumping it, all while carrying you Ghost sat you down on the edge of the bed heâd been keen to claim as his own right when youâd arrived. You were nearly asleep just sitting there when he unlaced your boots enough to tug them off, pulled your shirt off over your head, and replaced it with one of his hoodies. Finally, he takes off your pants and nods for you to move up to the top of the bed, acting just as he would normally. But as he climbed into the bed next to you and tugged you back against him tightly, you realized youâd gotten a lot more than you bargained for.
Sure you mightâve changed Ghostâs mind about getting head⌠but you werenât finished yet. Because Ghost was curling his arm around your waist and burying his masked face in between your shoulder blades like cuddling with you at night was the usual way of things. His fingers innocently traced the waistband of your underwear, and he radiated body heat that melted away the fringe sensations of cold on your body easily.
âIâve made a decision,â He whispers very quietly so as not to wake the others. And you wiggle back a little closer to him, nodding your head as a silent acknowledgment for him to go on. Expecting him to say that you did -in fact- change his mind about getting blown.
âYouâre mine now.â
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