#the pieces of me (cling to you)
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OK JUST A LITTLE THING BECAUSE IM INSANE @cubbihue
Song: Plastic by Cheekface
#IDENTITY HORROR MY BELOVED#I want to watch him fall apart#I need him to explode#fop#fairly oddparents#fop a new wish#fairly oddparents a new wish#animation#animatic#art#digital art#fanart#body horror#I sent in an anon ask a bit ago about Chimmy being able to accidentally destroy himself if he realized what he was#and that idea makes me so so so crazy#The slow dawning horror that you arent yourself#followed by the horrific deterioration of your body as a direct result of your knowlege#like a punishment you cant undo#a horrible cycle of falling to pieces reinforcing this horrific reality and that horrific reality tearing you to pieces#you know now. you cant go back even if you want to#and the visual symbolism body horror of literally falling into pieces. AGHGhgh he's hollow in there just so you know#He could stick his whole arm in and not reach the back of his skull its just a dark pit completely hollow and unnatural#I like to think if you looked deep enough you could see stars#AUGHGH STRIPPING CHARACTERS OF THEIR HUMANITY MY BELOVED#removing even their basest comforts. Even their body isnt familiar to them anymore#Its this strange horrifying thing. What will it do next? Was it ever theirs? Should they be afraid?#and in my hands the answer will always be yes#Sorry Im going insane I love your au#I like characters who cling on to humanity that can never be theirs ♥
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#omniscient reader's viewpoint#orv#orv spoilers#kdj#sys#lgy#hsy#yjh#yoohan#art tag#digital#ink#pencil#you know joker's pants from persona? that's what i like to put yjh in if i ever drew his whole body#which i never do#i think yoohan should think of each other 'you're just like me' 'you disgust me because of that' 'you're like him' 'you're not enough like#him' 'he is like me' 'he's nothing like you'#fragments of the same existence struggling to recognize themselves. each other.#desperately clinging to something that is almost-just-right and hating it for not being a perfect fit#not to say that everything would be resolved if kim dokja is made aware of their feelings and reciprocates#there will always be a part missing#a part that chafes#but even if nothing works out. even if the pieces can't reconnect perfectly or at all#they keep calling out and leaving pieces of themselves in each other
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Hmm I think the sams fandom has a little problem recognizing that how much you care for someone and how much you hurt someone are not directly linked. You can hurt people you care about, it doesn't make the hurt Better or more okay, but it's possible and can be messy and grey rather than black and white. Moon lashing out at his living family doesn't mean he cares about them any less, Ruin going through with his plan doesn't mean he's randomly lying about liking Solar, SF didn't pull the idea that Eclipse cared in his own messed up way out of nowhere even though Eclipse was their #1 problem, etc etc
#you know we dont have to pretend these characters didnt care about anyone else at all to say their actions are bad right#yeah yeah accuse me of clinging onto the greyness of their situations to sympathize or redeem them in aus or whatever#but you can absolutely look at like Ruin acknowledge that he Does care BUT still chose his 'for the greater good' plan anyway#to make him out as even a bigger piece of shit than if he didn't care about any of them at all#make things more interesting#sun and moon show#tsams
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“Sasha.” He murmurs into her mouth. “Yes.” She confirms. It’s me — I know — Me too — You’re welcome — like a cold reader. The kind of con he would have laughed out of the Institute. But his head’s worn down, his heart even moreso. He’s tired of thinking. —— John has one assistant he still trusts.
woe, spooky little john(not!)sasha thing i wrote be upon ye
#scrawlings#the magnus archives#tma#tma fanfic#jonsasha#johnsasha#jonathan sims#john sims#sasha james#not!sasha#this is real rough around the edges i miiiiight rewrite it when i get further into tma but also i had to get it outta my head or i'd die#hence why i didnt post it til now i was like Do i want this public-public lol#plus i haveeee a lot of other writing on my plate just in general rn haha#ringing my little bell. why is johnsasha a rarepair iv been going insane abt them for like 3 days#(only a bit into season 2 no spoilies) the john+not!sasha dynamic makes me insane.#what if you were a paranoid piece of shit and you had one person you trusted and That Happened To Her#but you still trust her completely. and part of it is because of how little you can trust anybody else#and so you are most susceptible to what's happening because you're in a downward spiral and will cling to any#validation on your backwards thinking. god
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I had this friend. Martha, she was called. Martha Jones. She was brilliant. And I destroyed half her life.
#marthajonesedit#tenedit#dwedit#dwgifs#doctor who#doctorwhoedit#timelordgifs#martha jones#the doctor#tenth doctor#brotp: if that’s how you still see me#after rose the doctor was launched into the endless vortex of space and time#without anything to ground him#he was lost#and martha becomes his anchor#the way he clings to her#the way he smiles when he holds her#she was his safety net#she helped piece him back together#she was his landing lights#and in his selfishness#he almost ruined her#but she got out#she survived the storm that is the doctor#and became her own anchor#and though it devastated him to watch her leave#their friendship became all the more stronger for it
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Very excited to share my Supercorp Big Bang 2023 fic:
the pieces of me (cling to you)
Em (@shipinsight) was my lovely artist for this collaboration and she made stunning art for my fic here: the pieces of me (cling to you) Art
Please go show her some love, she did such an amazing job 💗💗
moodboard below done by my talented friend (@awaitingrain ) 💗💗
the pieces of me (cling to you)
Summary:
"To know me is to know pain, Supergirl." Lena says simply. "To know me is to know that coincidentally, on the same day you disappeared, my helicopter was blown out of the sky."
Lena's words land their intended blow. Supergirl flinches, guilt etched across her face like Lena had just damned her to Hades. And maybe she did.
"To know me," she continues, stalking forward once more, watching in sardonic glee as the veins in Supergirl's body light up once more."is to understand that I don't care about what if's and altruistic Supers who also want to do no harm." She says, pausing when Supergirl’s prone form is but an inch from her boot.
Or
What if Metallo Lena meets Supergirl and feels a strange connection to her that she couldn't identify the source of? And what if she kept Supergirl around long enough to explain this strangeness to her?
Written for Supercorp Big Bang 2023
And thank you to the awesome mods who organized this event 💗 @supercorpbb
#supercorp#scbb 2023#supergirl#lena luthor#kara danvers#the pieces of me (cling to you)#metallo lena#5x13 canon divergent#this fic is my baby#my fics#my writing
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Happy 8th birthday Undertale I’m so glad nothing bad happened to my kids here
#they are happy and normal and have no diseases:)#Flowey’s still my all time favorite but if I think about specifically Asriel for too long I ouggghhh#my son he has every disease#don’t even get me started on Chara#Chara was my first cosplay ever btw i haven’t cosplayed in like two years but 12 year old me ate with that one#and i used to have a sketchbook full of handwritten undertale fanfic#but then my house burned down#womp womp#tbh when you and your sibling are stuck in a cycle of nostaglia and are doomed by the narrative to continue clinging onto the past#haunting the narrative Chara vs i am the narrative Flowey#i think my first piece of fanart was technically napstablook though#asriel dreemurr#asriel#Chara#Chara dreemurr#undertale#fan art#digital art#undertale fanart#bread draws
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I want him to stalk over me when he talks to me <33 I already have to look up at him, but its so so addictive when he makes it obvious how much taller he is then me <333
#Like y e s#im tall to others#but to you Im short#you could cling to me and we cannmake a perfect piece#you can rest your chin on my head and be surrounded by me#let me be your pillowwwww!!!!#oni.darling#lovesick#lovecore
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nausea forever
#k#my art#horror#what do u want me to tag this as v_v. i am creating and posting in my diary#cw death#i dont think i actually have much to say about this piece#i think it pretty clearly speaks for itself#but. i dunno. if u dont get it and want to: there is a pull between knowing the Truth of death Not being an answer#but also you Cant answer any questions once youre gone anyways. its just such a waste#i think this is what this expresses to me#“what a Waste. why would you do that.”#but i am mostly posting this for v_v myself... im hoping that#if i can get better#i can remember how Close to. death. i felt now#and cling to Having Gotten Through#of course this all hinges on me getting thru :3#godspeed. please come with me.#horror art
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When I first finished my Amaldyne ref I started on an image of her breathing dragonfire but never finished it. Until now! Here she is my beautiful baby girl setting things on fire. Idk how I feel about the shading but I'm kinda proud about how revenant!Amaldyne looks. (Also if you're wondering why her neck is Like That it's because maintaining your form as a big hungry goop puddle is especially hard when you're also angy). This was mostly just to see how dragonfire looks when I try blending it a bit (which I don't do on the refs to make it more clear which colors go where) but I might mess around with it in the future, idk.
Anyway some Lizard Lore(TM): dragonfire is a very unique substance. Impossible to replicate (at least under current magical science), dragonfire can and will destroy everything it touches save for the dragon who breathes it. All dragons have at least a few sparks (even if all they ever manage to do is cough up smoke and embers), but a vast majority only have enough to breathe out a single stream for a few minutes, after which they'll need to stop and recover. Amaldyne is probably about average when it comes to dragonfire (although nothing about my universe is set in stone yet sooooo). Dragonfire can come in any color except blue (although there are a handful of old, scattered scraps of legend about a powerful sky dragon with bright cyan flames). It also sometimes feels more like a dragon's element rather than regular fire (although most who get hit by it are generally too distracted by the feeling of being burned by magic fire to describe the experience afterwards). Amaldyne, as a poison dragon, has fire that feels like getting doused in acid (complete with an odd, slimy sensation that lingers for awhile after). It's pretty common and there really isn't any particular significance to it. Just an odd quirk of dragon magic. Also, if a dragon's fire is somehow extinguished (methods to do so are currently unknown) or stolen (incredibly difficult but also quite possible, if you know a few tricks), it WILL kill them. A dragon won't survive without their dragonfire, not even for a moment.
#anyway i love her i love her i love her so much#i think seeing the comparison of regular-sized ordinary amaldyne vs big freaky revenant!amaldyne has convinced me that she's bigger after#she emerges from the cocoon#also fun fact about her broken horn! i've decided that after her death (when eityr finds her and pulls her from the battlefield)#eityr saw one of her horns was broken (and maybe kept the broken piece? idk she's a freak about her (only) friend)#and somehow amaldyne found out about this and consciously chose to make her horn look broken whenever she assumed her dragon form#part of her campaign to cling on to the remnants of her mortality#(can. can you tell i developed massive amounts of story and character details while neck-deep into my t/m/a hyperfixation? can you?)#(censoring t/m/a to keep it out of the fandom tags lol.)#anyway i love my little monster poison dragon#(btw dragon elements are their own whole lore Thing)#ok anyway sorting tag time:#amaldyne#amaldyne rotwing#the lizard crew#lizardverse#body horror#body horror tw#tw body horror#idk if the tag applies but she's doing the thing where her lower jaw sort of... separates..... so i figured i should tag just in case?#if there's another better tag let me know#anyway i should go make dinner now#ok goodbye.#WAIT FORGOT MY ART TAG#sparkarts#<- is it that i think it’s that#ok i’m serious now. pasta time.
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Writing over 30,000 words worth of content for a fic only to realize it’s all pointless because you have no interest in it anymore and you were never gonna finish it anyway….
What even is The Point anymore
#current mood#it’s so joever#this isn’t even the worst part honestly#what really sucks is that this project was the last thing in my life I had any sustainable interest in and now that’s gone too.#now I have nothing. like#the fuck am I supposed to do??? get a new interest??? that’s fucking impossible#nothing hits like it used to and everything is just….bland….and SO MUCH EFFORT to get into#like hobbies are so difficult? and my old hobbies (ex writing) are becoming more and more toxic and like a chore rather than something fun#like writing at this point has become a battle of perfectionism and I’m fucking losing#what am I supposed to do. nothing inspires me. I have no interests. no hobbies. not many friends irl#and it’s not like we ever hang out because people are a fucking piece of work#either they cling to you like dog shit or they never respond to your texts no in between#im just so tired of existing??? and also college??? is fine but like#what the fuck am I DOING here like#why am I getting an art degree??? is this really how I should be spending my time and my parents money?#what the fuck am I gonna do for a job??? what do I WANT from a job???? I don’t even fucking know#i can’t see myself being happy in life doing anything and that’s such a nonstarter#it makes it impossible to start planning anything because I feel paralyzed with fear#and like I said….i don’t have any interests. I don’t LIKE anything. I am the antithesis of curiosity and interest like. there’s just nothing#i can’t do this anymore#im so done#idk why I made this so long but#I guess I have a lot on my mind I wanted to share#sorry for cringe posting on main it will happen again#im sorry in general actually for everything im sorry for being needy and attention seeking and annoying and flaky and never finishing any of#my fics because I lose interest and for not responding to anyone in my inbox I’m sorry#personal#cringe#cringetober#long tags
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there are only two categories in the world. small and smaller
#ill write this into a poem at some point probably but for now i just need to say it#i just feel so small and woven and the world looks so big. when does it shrink to fit me. or when do i rise to meet it. either way#the universe and i are soooo at odds because if there is anything about me it is that i always WANT. i just want so much forever.#and honestly there's not enough life in me to keep wanting. i cannot keep clinging to so many things. my hands can't hold them#i'm just too small i feel like a pinprick or a piece of hair or an eyelash and the world is sooo big#there are like. things being held over my head. Okay you can have this but you have to be big enough or good enough to take it.#and i can't!!! i can't be that!!!! i am like an ANT i am just too nonexistent to have half the things i am so desperately yearning for#sorry. im normal. this sickness is like a disease it's making me evil and full of shame#hello world
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ot3s are so good, i will use any excuse to smash three ppl together like dolls. theyre always my fave ships and all my ocs always end up in polycules. so like. same hat.
#thank you for understanding. i will not change i will not improve etc#jayatalks#but no i think the thing about ensemble casts is that by the end of their narratives the idea of separating any of them-#just feels like ripping their heart into pieces. you can’t make me do it. they have two hands and four limbs to cling to for a reason
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love having creative ideas. new izombie mpreg fic that overlaps the timeline of the first. Pieces of You. building The Rajor house in the sims 4. makin a lil music video for my blorbos.
#cling clang#someone check on me in a month to see if ive actually finished any of these#(except pieces of you i already know i have a lot of work left on it)
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I cant sleep... shit sucks i want to be in my beloved's arms already. Now im just spoiled (i sleep so peacefully w her..)
#itd help if i werent also holding at bay 3 separate mental breakdowns probably#i wish i could so easily believe in that but then too we've seen where ''seeing what you want to see#& believing what you wish was true rather than looking at reality'' has gotten us. i dont think i can just#cling to wishing & have it turn out okay just because i want it to. at the same time!! life is being#much more kind to me now than it has ever been before#there isnt much to be done for any of the things weighing on my heart so heavily#my effort is better spent elsewhere.. & all of those pieces will fall where they may. only after will i be able to do more.
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Happy Supercorp Sunday! ❤️💙 Just reposting the character study I'd done on metallo lena:
the pieces of me (cling to you)
Summary:
"To know me is to know pain, Supergirl." Lena says simply. "To know me is to know that coincidentally, on the same day you disappeared, my helicopter was blown out of the sky."
Lena's words land their intended blow. Supergirl flinches, guilt etched across her face like Lena had just damned her to Hades. And maybe she did.
"To know me," she continues, stalking forward once more, watching in sardonic glee as the veins in Supergirl's body light up once more."is to understand that I don't care about what if's and altruistic Supers who also want to do no harm." She says, pausing when Supergirl’s prone form is but an inch from her boot.
Or
What if Metallo Lena meets Supergirl and feels a strange connection to her that she couldn't identify the source of? And what if she kept Supergirl around long enough to explain this strangeness to her?
written for scbb 2023
#supercorp#supergirl#metallo lena#kara danvers#lena luthor#the pieces of me (cling to you)#a metallo lena character study#5x13 canon divergent#happy supercorp sunday#my fics#my writing
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