#the perfect conclusion? idk
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Blyke and John: Parallel Characters
I’ve written multiple entries about this,
[x] [x] [x]
But I’m back to make a comprehensive analysis about the glaring similarities between these two. I’ll try not to repeat myself here.
‼️SPOILER WARNING for the whole series‼️ but this mostly focuses on the story before John’s suspension.
Firstly, this scene:
ch. 121
This conversation takes place near the beginning of the Joker arc. It’s after John targets Zeke, after he targets Juni, and the day before he goes after Seraphina’s kidnappers. The timing is important.
“If someone hit your best friend, would you let it slide?”
That question is supposed to remind us what John does to people who hurt Seraphina: hunting them down and sending them to the hospital. Blyke shooting a destructive beam really close to John was an example of a trait they share: they both blow up violently when people mistreat their friends.
John’s downward spiral carries strong themes of hypocrisy. He’s angry at the world, he’s angry at himself, and as a coping mechanism, he chooses to believe that everyone else is as bad as he is. That means that most of the traits he hates others for are the same things he hates about himself. In this scene, Blyke is unintentionally calling out this hypocrisy: “What I did is no different from what you do”.
But Blyke’s just trying to connect with John here, he has no idea what John’s been doing. And John, of course, doesn’t give a shit about what Blyke has to say. This line was here for the audience to notice.
They’re both so similar, but their similarity immediately causes tension between them because, well, John was on the wrong end of Blyke’s protectiveness.
I really love the way this was written— there are so many flashbacks to this scene, but they remember it differently. John remembers the part that hurt him— he’d describe it as “the time that jackass shot a beam at me”. Blyke remembers the part that hurt him, or rather, hurt Remi: “the time that jackass hit Remi for no reason”.
Blyke and John are both hotheaded characters with strong ideals. They’re similar enough that Seraphina points it out:
(ch. 80)
As Blyke grows as a character, he becomes more like John: sticking up for low tiers and speaking out against the injustice in the world. But while Blyke is doing that more, John is going in the opposite direction, until they are fully opposed to each other.
Speaking of Blyke’s character arc, it took me a few rereads to actually understand what part of him changed. His kindness, selflessness, bravery— all of those things were there from the start. Blyke’s character arc was about becoming more aware of his surroundings, and how his carelessness can harm others. Blyke was never malicious, but after X-Rei and integrating more with the school, he becomes aware of people suffering around him and how he unintentionally contributes to it. He becomes less reckless, privy to the flaws in the system he grew up not questioning, and uses his power more responsibly. He even comes up with a more controlled way to wield his ability. The part of Blyke that changes is his maturity.
Part of John’s character arc is also about being careful. It’s not as close of a parallel as other things are, but one of the things that John works on during his redemption arc is holding back. Both of them learn self-control throughout the series, and for John, that means acting early before his emotions spiral out of hand.
Adding onto my first point about the two of them wanting to protect their friends— the fact that they can’t do that makes them both angry and desperate. For most of the story, the “block” that prevents John from protecting Seraphina is in his head. It’s his own trauma that holds him back. The block that prevents Blyke from protecting his friends is, guess what? Also John’s trauma! Parallels abound.
Another thing I noticed in Episode 80 is this:
Notice that when Seraphina says “I’d take that over strength any day,” John is looking at the camera. He’s avoiding Sera’s gaze. Seraphina is saying she prefers honesty over strength. John is very strong, and very dishonest, but Seraphina thinks the opposite because John is so dishonest. John appears to be reflecting on this disconnect.
In relation to this analysis, Seraphina is actually pointing out a major difference between Blyke and John. Beyond that, she’s praising Blyke’s traits, (less strong but very open) above John’s traits, (strong as fuck but a liar with his pants on fire). Furthermore, John really cares what Seraphina thinks of him. Knowing that she would think less of him is the main reason why he spent so much time and effort preventing her from catching his lies.
This leads into my main point here: Blyke is the “goody-two-shoes” version of John. Or, more accurately, the person that John wants to be. Blyke has a clean track record and doesn’t really get into trouble. He is respected and left alone by the school without being hated and feared, he de-escalates conflicts without taking things too far, he doesn’t lose control, he’s someone Seraphina thinks highly of, hell, even his grades are better! Blyke represents everything that John wants to be, and the person that he could have been if he’d gone down a different path.
But, crucially, John is also what Blyke wants to be. Well, not wholly, but his ability? His strength? It’s one of the things John hates about himself, but Blyke wants that strength so desperately that he risks his life for it over and over again.
They’re both desperate to be like each other, even when they hate each other the most. Neither of them have any idea how alike they already are.
I don’t know what Season 3 holds in store for us, but I do hope that John realizes that Blyke embodies who he wants to be, because mutual jealousy would be a very interesting dynamic to explore in my opinion. I also hope that it ends up being something they can bond over, by helping each other accomplish their personal goals. (Blyke being another helper in John’s character arc, and John helping Blyke train.)
A side note: John beat up Blyke four separate times. That’s more than any other character, which is interesting because John’s main rival is supposed to be Arlo. For reference, John has beaten Arlo twice, three times if you count the time when Seraphina intervened, and he only beat him unconscious once. But John beat Blyke to the point of passing out all four times, the worst of which being a shot clean through his chest. (shoulder? Unclear. S1 finale).
It’s odd, isn’t it? Out of everyone, Blyke is the one who John physically hurt the most. John’s only grudge against him is an old memory from episode 33, of an event that didn’t actually harm him. John’s grudge against Arlo is much more serious and again— that’s his main rival. So why is it that he’s so much more violent towards Blyke?
The problem here is that I’ve been thinking about these fights as “John picking on Blyke”. And that’s… kind of true? But while Blyke didn’t start any of these fights, they were all consensual in a way. He didn’t seek to fight John, nor was he ever happy about fighting John, but he was always a willing participant.
(138, 153, 206, & 211)
In three out of these four fights, John didn’t even expect to be fighting Blyke going into it. This is significant because while Arlo is John’s main rival, John absolutely fills that role for Blyke. Blyke’s own agency is what leads to most of these events. The reason, narratively speaking, why they fight so much is not for John’s character, but for Blyke.
For John, his reason for fighting Blyke so much is not narrative but moreso symbolic. John is angry at everyone and everything, but ultimately the person he hates the most is himself. It’s only fitting that the character most like him would bear the brunt of his wrath.
As John is having his positive character arc (suspension and post-suspension), he is becoming more like Blyke, and the two of them reach a point where they’re even more similar than they were at the start of the series.
In the Rowden amusement park, John does start to realize how similar they are:
(249)
Additionally, I want to draw your attention to the parallels between this scene:
Blyke and John’s argument in chapter 249
(which the image limit won’t let me add, scroll until you see red hair.)
And this scene:
Argument in ch. 121 (it’s at the beginning)
Two sides of the same coin.
Furthermore, in the S2 finale, Blyke is shown being taken to Keon. There is an implication that by Season 3, Blyke and John will share Keon-related trauma as well. Despite my pessimistic predictions, I do hope that this is a similarity that can bring them together rather than tear them apart.
#unordinary#I had another point that i had to cut#because it was about the john slaps remi scene#and how like blyke knew he wasn’t gonna miss and hit john by accident but john doesn’t necessarily know that#and that john assumes the worst (blyke was aiming for his head) bc he’s mad#and blyke also assumes the worst (that john hit remi for no reason). But when i was looking for screenshots to back it up#and i was looking for the one panel where john referred to blyke as “that idiotic redhead who tried to blow my brains out”#as proof of john assuming the worst#But then i found it and it doesn’t even say what i thought it said#it says “THREATENED to blow my brains out”#Smh john didn’t even assume the worst. He knew it was jyst a threatening shot even thogh he was mad#And then my whole thing kinda falls apart because blyke assuming the worst is actually just the logical conclusion since he can’t read mind#Like how was he gonna know john was having trauma issues#Yargh okay so i think i cut all the parts that don’t really make sense but it’s late so this is a low quality proofread#Gonna be honest this is NOT structured very well#Theres more to be said about john hating other people for the same reasons he hates himself#and I didn’t quite hit it#but it’s lateeeeeee#something about how Blyke is so similar to john but lacks most of what John hates about himself so John projects his insecurities—#back onto him anyway#Something about in ch 249 when he says something something “because I couldn’t cope with the fact that you guys weren’t actually bad people#Yeah idk im too tired to get into it#blyke unordinary#john unordinary#oh also has something to do with when john says “i may have deserved those classes but they sure as hell don’t” about keon#i think that’s significant#analysis#i have a bad feeling that someone in my notes is gonna purposely misinterpret my “goody two shoes” blyke statement ngl#”did you say that blyke is perfect and john is evil”#like something like that
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One of my favorite throwaway things in gravity falls is when Mabel and Stan both put their index fingers together when thinking in 'The Love God'.
"Hopeless case, eh?"
"So young people are into hot air balloons, eh?"
Wish I had the frames, lol
#gravity falls#idk it just makes me happy#disney is rude and won't let me screenshot it. if i try to find it i will get distracted for two hours#):<#i actually like this episode the whole mabel drugging them is just kinda like sure but im a bit aro so idk how that works anyway#i dont mind the conclusion. its like yeah i gave them drug. time to fix it with more drugs#was doodling and was like O: this is a perfect pose for Stan rn
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Fanfic/fancomic idea I just thought of while watching SpongeBob clips:
Semi-early on in Rocket and Groot knowing each-other/working together, Groot sees Rocket’s cybernetics for the first time. Maybe it’s a similar moment to when Quill first saw them in the prison scene in Vol.1, maybe it was during a particularly intense battle with a bounty and Rocket gets the back of his shirt torn up exposing his back but just yells at Groot to focus on beating the other guy etc.
Whatever the case, Groot sees Rocket’s cybernetics and, not yet fully understanding the concept of cyborgs or anything, tries asking Rocket about them later. But Rocket just keeps either trying to deflect and change the subject or just tells Groot to shut it and quit bugging him about it.
So Groot, having no context or idea of Rockets trauma and everything, starts thinking and filling in the blanks in his own way. And after putting together:
The metal things on rockets body
His habit of stealing peoples robotic prosthetics, batteries and other electronics
The fact Rocket hates taking baths and (seemingly) most liquids apart from alcohol
The fact Rocket never laughs at Groots jokes
And the fact he never shows any genuine emotion other than rage or cockiness
Groot comes to the Galaxy shattering realisation that Rocket is, in fact… A ROBOT.
Aside from the intital internal screaming he has about everything making so much more sense now, Groot does find it strange how mammalian Rocket looks. But then Groot figures, since they have previously caught robot bounties who tried (and failed) to pass themselves as organics by wearing artificial skin, Rocket’s probably doing the same thing.
And oh no, maybe that’s why he was so defensive before about those metal parts of him showing?? Maybe he’s been discriminated against for being a robot and is trying to pass himself off as an organic animal to protect himself? And/or he has a deep seeded internalised robot phobia???? And Groot trying to push him about it made it worse?!??!??
So Groot, after realising the “truth”, tries to be more supportive of rocket and him being a robot. He doesn’t directly confront Rocket or try to press him on it. Since he tried that before and fails and he’s figured out it’s a sensitive subject for rocket. But Groot does his research on robots and tries to figure out what make and model rocket is (with very few results) so he can better look after him incase he malfunctions or something, he makes sure to “borrow” extra batteries and oil canisters when ever they’re at a place with electronics because he figures that’s what he really uses for sustenance instead of all the burgers and junk food he eats in front of Groot for (what he thinks is) the sake of appearance, tries to stop him from getting wet whenever it rains or they visit a mostly water-covered planet, calls Rocket out if/whenever he makes crude comments about other robots because (internally) Groot draws the line at Rocket taking his own issues about being a robot out on his fellow robots etc etc. All because Groot doesn’t care what Rocket is and just wants his best friend to be happy and feel safe and accepted as he is. As well as for him to trust Groot enough to come out in his own time when he feels ready.
Meanwhile Rocket is just. Completely baffled by Groot acting so weird around him all the sudden and doing all this. And no idea Groot thinks he’s a robot because of his cybernetics. Eventually culminating when things escalate out of hand and Groot cutting to the chase, gently telling rocket he knows he’s a robot and that he doesn’t have to be afraid of hiding it anymore because Groot still cares about him no matter what.
…And rocket, slightly less gently, telling Groot that goD FLARKIN DAMNIT GROOT!!! IM NOT A GODDAMN ROBOT YOU STUPID MOLDY OVERGROWN PEICE OF CRAP TWIG!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Basically, it’s the Krab Borg episode of SpongeBob if SpongeBob tried being a supportive robot ally to Mr.Krabs instead of jumping him in his office with Squidward.
#SpongeBob#spongebob squarepants#gotg#guardians of the galaxy#rocket raccoon#groot#rocket and groot#gotg fanfic idea#gotg fanfiction#gotg headcanon#groot is not the brightest when it comes to social ques and basic common sense but he a kind soul#he just wants his racoon/robot/alien buddy to be happy#groot is funniest when he’s both emotionally intelligent and a complete dumbass at the same time#and yeah I know it’s a little contrived to assume groot doesn’t know what a cyborg is in a galaxy full of them#but like idk groot isn’t exactly the brightest#plus it makes him jumping to the conclusion rockets a robot funnier ok shut up#if we ever get an actual full length rocket and groot spin-off show this would be a perfect episode plot#also I was thinking of the Marvels Rocket and Groot shorts version of the characters while writing this#but tbh I think this idea could apply to any continuity/version of gotg where rocket has cybernetic implants like the MCU or Eidos game
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Aaand 28-32 😁 ✨
ABSOLUTELY
28. do you collect anything?
yes several things! perfume bottles, vintage erotica, weird things in resin, matryoshki, these very specific boxes made out of birchbark, postcards (joint collection between me and the gf), and any items that are uniquely hideous. someday i’ll post a picture of the Jesus plate which is one of the best things i own
29. what do you do when you’re sad?
depends on the type of sad! a lot of times i cry or watch something that will make me cry. i also sing, scream, or sing-scream in my car. sometimes i just start vomiting. to cope i write.
30. what’s one thing that never fails to make you happy?
I was just talking with my sister about this but that one Xmas episode of the great British baking show with the Derry girls cast. probably one of the funniest things i’ve ever seen
31. are you messy or organized?
quite messy but i’m picky about cleanliness
32. how many tabs do you have open right now?
my phone browser has the infinity symbol rn LMAOOO
questions
#ask and you shall receive#shatterthefragments#the infinity symbol…my gd#also i have quite the saga about weird things in resin. tldr. i was writing about ten years ago and was like man what’s the most perfect#gift you could ever possibly get for someone. and came to the conclusion that it would be a rainbow beetle in resin (??? idk) and I have#DREAMED ABOUT THIS. HAD A LITERAL DREAM. and then in February i was visiting my sister and found a fuckin beetle in resin at an insane#vintage mall and was like BROOOO
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u know. if u gain more confidence in ur writing then it'll be more fun and less miserable
#i just feel like this has to be said#it's not easy to do ofc it's not and i had help#but it's never wrong to try and work on urself#bc being miserable is just not worth it#stop overediting stop trying to be perfect just post ur writing and then write a lot more#it's not easy but it's simple#if that doesn't work for u then find smthg that does#bc genuinely u guys Need some confidence#bc that's ur hobby and u shouldn't be miserable while doing ur hobby#gain confidence set boundaries put it down when it needs to be put down go to sleep when u need to sleep#it takes a lot of time and a lot of trying but so much can change for u if u just try#and i am trying to take that advice myself in a lot of other areas im not perfect#but my writing improved so much since i gained more confidence and now i just have so much fun writing#where i had to sit myself down and make myself write previously it's just part of my routine now and i do it nearly every day bc i like it#idk if that makes sense but conclusion: y'all need more confidence in ur writing so u can stop being miserable#dni if this post doesn't apply to u and u like being miserable or smthg idk#this is also not abt mental illness so don't start#this is abt insecurity making u miserable#and ruining the joy of creation#thank u for coming to my ted talk#dreamy talks
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alvita's birthday exchange ⇝ for hadley @supermarine-silvally
ft. Bravada Yara x Portgas Ace
"And I'll surrender myself to you."
x x
I hope you like it!
bonus:
a small icon set to thank you for all the art you made for me! <33
#alvita's edits#alvita's birthday exchange#hadley my beloved#okay so fun fact#i Do Not Know how ace's and yara's skin tones compare to each other#but i stalked -- i mean poked around in your blog and i've come to the conclusion that they're supposed to both be relatively light skinned#idk i am bad af at colors y'all#also tried to keep a purplish coloring in the cover#i ended up keeping a non-purple ver bc the shade of it was making me upset#the title is supposed to be purple fading into gold#keyword supposed to#heavy sigh#i've never done an animated cover so this is New™️ to me#so if you want to have anything changed pls hmu!#i feel like covers are THE graphic for a fic so i want to get it as perfect as possible#another fun fact is like idk which is right and left anymore#so if i made the dumbest mistake ever and colored/covered the wrong eye PLS tell me#the quality enhancer also doesn't consider ace to be worthy of its attention#that's why he's grainy af#i tried to get it to enhance him but cutout was like 'lol nope'#so yeah#alright these tags are getting long af again
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guys they have the snipers are trained on me for saying this but the next song is going to be spkothdvl—💥💥💥🔫🔫
#idkhow#ough💥💥💥💥 this is the end guys…….#im sorry. its 1am and i was ready to be asleep at 9:30#i think the sleep demons are taking me now#IM NOT CRAZY! theorize with me for a second here.#WHAT LOVE had an alternative release. i think. i cant find the picture. AND SO DID SPKOTHDVL. I REMEMBER THIS CLEAR AS DAY.#so it can only be assumed that spkothdvl comes out next right?? unless im just jumping to ridiculous conclusions in which case#i got nothing#i have doubts that itll be infatuation for some reason. idk the fact that its dallons favourite kind of pushes it away#from the realm of possibility to me. dallon is a very patient person so i doubt theyd be quick to shove their favourite song out like that.#ALL SPECULATION. IF IM WRONG IM WRONG! WE WILL FIND OUT NEXT WEEK. AND THEN THE ALBUM#AAH OKAY WHILE IM TALKING. IM SO FUCCKJNINH EXCITED TO HEAR DOWNSIDE ON VINYL. IDK WHY#AND WHAT LOVE. I THINK THEYLL JUST BOTH SOUND PERFECT ON VINYL. sorry im done now im going to bed#just needed to get my ridiculous theories out there#IM TELLING YOU GUYS. ITS GONNA BE SPKOTHDVL#UNLESS IT WONT BE.#IM SLEEPING NOW GOODNIGHT#chase said something alright
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Some thoughts on the choice of Carina Smyth's first name
Ngl even though there are many things I don't like about DMTNT, I think that Carina is like one of the best names that could be chosen for Barbossa's daughter. It sounds like a pretty regular name at first, but I think the backstory is what makes it actually a really great choice.
"Carina" is the name of a star constellation which is also known as "keel of the ship". In the german dub of the movie this is actually made more obvious, as Carina says that she's named after said star constellation, whereas in the original she says the the brightest star in the north (which is part of the constellation) gave her her name. Being named after a star constellation which resembles a ship (or at least a part thereof), her name is connected to both the stars and the sea, two focal points in Barbossa's life as a pirate and as a captain. He's a man of the sea and an exceptional navigator, and I think it's safe to assume that he has a very good knowledge of astronomy, particularly for navigational purposes. As he said himself, he knows which stars to follow home.
I like to think that Barbossa consciously chose his daughter's name because of its meaning. However, we unfortunately don't know under which conditions it was chosen, since we simply don't have enough information about his and Margaret Smyth's relationship. How many months before the birth did he learn that he was going to be a father? Were he and Margaret able to prepare for the changes in their lives that might come with having a child, did they make any plans for the future? Did they think up names together, and he suggested Carina, should they have a daughter? Or did Hector just return to land one day to learn his partner had died while he was at sea, and left him a child, and he had to come up with a name on the spot and the first thing that came to his mind were the star constellations?
I kind of doubt that we will get any canonical answers to those questions, so they are left to the realm of headcanons. I personally like to imagine that Barbossa chose the name carefully, and because of what it meant to him personally. Even though he kind of said in the movie that he never wanted his daughter to be associated with pirates (which happens to include himself), I think as her father he still wanted to make at least one meaningful impact on her life, which happened to be the choice of her name. Maybe also, in that way he would never forget her, since whenever he observed the sky and saw the star constellation Carina, he would also think of his daughter.
#tbh the actual reason I wrote this is bc I am struggling to come up with a name for a barbossa x oc fanchild#but nothing feels quite perfect and I ended up thinking too much about it#and came to the conclusion it's because his canon daughter's name already has the best fitting backstory (and a very beautiful one at that)#anyway these are just random ramblings and idk if any of this makes sense or is complete garbage I just thought 'why not share my brainrot'#also I kinda got carried away with the paragraph about Margaret's and Hector's relationship oops haha#pirates of the caribbean#potc#potc 5#dead men tell no tales#dmtnt#headcanons#barbossa#hector barbossa#captain barbossa#carina smyth#carina barbossa#selniasoriginal#ramblings
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if you could change the outcome of any 3 motogp races (the outcome of the championship doesn’t change regardless tho) which ones would you chose?
one of those asks that immediately made me forget every single race I've watched in my life. it's a tough one, especially with the championship thing... I'm gonna add another criterion here and say nothing to do related to injury/death
so... I came up with one quite quickly, then got stuck, then came up with a second and got even more stuck. I'm quite reluctant to change any 'plot-relevant races' in the context of specific careers and rivalries, plus I'm ideologically opposed to stealing any win off a non-alien and giving it to an alien. which then kinda left me?? well. stuck. I don't like these picks but well maybe I'll come up with something better at some point
assen 2018: I simply could not come up with a third race so I'll just throw this one in. dovi + valentino really really should have gotten onto the podium in this race, those were extremely podium-worthy performances, it was such a deeply silly incident between the pair of them that took them out of podium contention. also it's still seen as a classic race and... I don't even begrudge the two beneficiaries for their podium, it's just one where the three best riders that day didn't end up on the podium and I would change that!! I don't even really care that much but also look I had a spot to fill. would've enjoyed the rancid podium vibes, it's what a race of that quality deserved
sepang 2018: just deeply annoying? like, I think it was a super impressive performance, the consistent lap times trick from a 78 year old was very neat, it was cute when jorge did unprompted valentino prop for metronome solidarity reasons, it's one of literally two premier class races where valentino crashed out of the lead so I don't even hold it against him. but... well, that one might have been building to a battle between marc and valentino, and it would've been fun to see that! not least because of location + relationship vibes in 2018. I'd change the result in preventing the crash, don't really care who wins after that point - hey, they can crash each other out if they want. I Just Wanted To See It
styria 2020: bit of a niche one but I remember being pissed off by this so I'm going with it - this should have been mir's win without the bloody red flag. now I'm very sorry that maverick was just having an abysmal time in austria, peace and love to him, I'd probably never step foot in the country again after the eight days he had in that country.... but still, his bike attempting to murder him did ruin what really should've been joan's first win. I'm very defensive of mir's win stats and I was supporting the title bid with zero wins agenda once that looked plausible, but now that he's just gotten stuck on one win for quite a few years... well, again, I do think it's kinda iconic but I'd also let him have two. and back then he wasn't even really looking like a title contender and was still going for his FIRST win.... I was feeling very sorry for him so. there
#//#brr brr#batsplat responds#the way I struggled with this you'd think I've never been upset by a race in my life#idk I do usually come around on most results for narrative purposes? like I can talk myself into vibing with most results#in THIS sport mind u in Certain Other Sports I've spent the last two and a half years screaming crying throwing up#anyway with the alien seasons I'd go with 'change all the technical regulations and start again' but that feels like a different question#I had a few where I was like 'well misano 2008 could've been more interesting if casey hadn't crashed'#or 'the 2009 title fight would've had a more exciting conclusion if jorge hadn't crashed phillip island 2009'#but like... both those mistakes are kinda interesting? also in that era there's no guarantee you'd actually get an interesting race#I had a moment where I was thinking 'oh but you could give sete a win post-2004' and... no? sorry but no#scrolled through all the results from 2000 to 2005 and went 'no these are all Perfect Actually'#I mean maybe I'd steal melandri's wins but that also seems incredibly petty. valentino levels of petty. can't do that#also was thinking mugello 2016 give valentino a functioning engine but that IS already a classic race so I won't touch it#or sachsenring 2012 would've been more fun if casey had not crashed but well. idk it's notable he DOES crash. kinda juicy#or silverstone 2015 marc's crash but to me 2015 is quantum locked like you can't really touch anything there#le mans 2017 pissed me off at the time but also. *shrug* whatever#jerez 2018 + catalunya 2019 were annoying because they ruined an already dire title fight picture#but I can admit how funny those were. especially catalunya#I do also think it's a little bit funny how jorge STILL gets shit over it like that one doesn't have an expiration date I fear#still gets referenced SO regularly. poor jorge
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i get it i get it i really get it but also it's very frustrating when a work of fiction raises you expectations, makes you thrilled for The Big Confrontation, and then the next post-clifhanger installment comes and it goes "after everything was over,"
#shrimp thoughts#this is sponsored by the abysmal atz diary story that makes me legit CONFLICTED because the diary ver is now my favourite#but also it contains the diaries (deeply unfavourite (annoying (i don't want to throw the photobook but i'm scared i might)))#but also i've read some fics that did this and as i said I GET IT a fic is for fun and not for Achieving Perfection. and also being great a#writing yearning or suspense doesn't automatically being great (or comfortable!) with writing confessions/fights#i personally love to leave my fics 'unfinished' in that they don't end with a conclusive state of things but like. in media res so to speak#i do enjoy that discomfort of not knowing what happens or IF it happens. i also enjoy making things Not Happen (characters being#passive and confused and just Not Doing Things they 'should' do because they don't know how/are afraid)#even though i know it probably seems terribly pretentious/cheap to better writers#that being said. there are stories that just... by themselves make a reader envision and anticipate The Great Thing and it's... not great a#all when it simply doesn't happen/is glossed over#idk man i am but an armchair-dwelling whiner
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im in love w him not only bc of who he is as a person nd how drawn i am to his personality, but also bc i feel like he's the only one who has ever wanted to see me. who i am, like deep down. he's the only one who i feel like i've ever connected with, in an easy nd genuine way. the only one who i feel has ever gotten me. he's the only one who's ever made me feel like we actually have a connection we're both in on, bc i havent had to pretend or put up a fake front for him bc he wanted the real image of me.
#unfortunately he has his own shit to deal w#so bc of one thing that was actually a mistake from me#he misjudged it nd saw it from his own perspective nd didnt understand mine#nd thus concluded that he saw me wrong nd didnt actually know who i am#nd then he had decided that so strongly he wasnt wven open to hear me out or try to understand what that situation was for me#that made me very sad nd hurt nd like#he doesnt actually like me as much as i like him#bc i would always always ask him nd hear him out before jumping to conclusions#i have asked him abt this but he is a wall nd doesnt wnna talk abt it#nd i cant force anyone so... yeh. it is what it is#i wish that we had the connection where he wanted to understandwhere i was coming from#instead of being like ughshe isnt the perfect image that i had constructed#so now im writing her off completely bc she doesntlive up to my expectations#but... my heart just loves him sm i can look past that#however... that is meaningless when i dont even know what he feels for me nd i cant get an answer out of him#maybe he doesnt wanna tell me bc he doesnt return my love nd he knows i'llbe hurt nd he'll risk losing me as a friend#i'd never stop talking to him tho.. that is the worst part#if imginna get over these feelings#i need to hear it straight from him. i need him to tell me thatno i am not in love with you#then i need to never talk to him again nd never lookat his social media#then it will hurt a lot but after a year or so i will only feel empty nd not hurt when i think of him#but i am tooweak to be the one to stop talking to him now#my entire day revolves around him nd i know its unhealthy but idk how to stop#since this obsession is unrequited i dont actually wanna feel it#but i have no idea how to stop#god this is driving me insane wtf is wrong w me??
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knees weak, arms are heavy
#listen it's too late for me to be very articulate about it (and i'm only on s3 now; the rest of the show is kind of hazily blending) but#one of the things i find most interesting about the red john plot...or jane's pursuit of red john maybe#is how ...individualized? it is#obviously the characters have different opinions on it - is his mission right; is it justified; would it help him; would it condemn him#and you as a viewer can side with one opinion more than others (and the opinions change as the show goes on -it's dynamic#which is another interesting but separate train of thought)#but imo/iirc the show itself - the narrative i guess - never makes any outright statement/judgement/comes to any definitive conclusion#on the matter#idk it's just even this - obviously everything's part of the larger narrative but at the same time#his asking does illustrate at least some level of doubt that he didn't seem to have in the last two seasons#is it because of lisbon; and the team; because of kristina; because of the strain it's putting on himself#(probably not the last one; he is demonstrably cavalier when it comes to his own wellbeing)#and he just happens to have the perfect man to express those doubts to right in front of him#(and that man just happens to be noah bennet alskdfja)#had winter said no what would his reaction have been? would his doubts have gotten worse - led to him taking a step towards giving it up?#would he have doubled down? we have no way of knowing because for this man; for this character it was worth it#and that helps shore up jane's belief that it would still be worth it to him too#idk i'm not making sense but it just feels like there's a level of grey area/audience interpretation to this story#rather than a hard line being drawn (by the story itself) on whether the actions taken in it are good or bad and i appreciate that#character-focused vs a morality tale maybe but that's more of an extreme phrasing#anyway ignore me i'm -#tm
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#another rant lmao#anyways just seriously thinking about how every single time i have voted ive done it tactically instead of just voting for who i prefer#luckily my mp is decent. not perfect. but pretty good#like theres little i could say i disagree with them#anyways point is i always got kind of frustrated with people#why would you split the vote? this is how the tories continuously get into power#but tbh regardless. maybe there is no Right way to go about this#and maybe you shouldnt just vote in hopes of keeping the tories out#even if youre voting for a party thats gonna lose#maybe thats better than giving a vote to someone whos a dickhead#i think looking at americans has kind of helped me come to this conclusion#because look whata happened#they did it. they got the democrats in. but did it matter? why the fuck play into a system thats not for you#idk im not too well read on politics etc i am but a girl#le text post
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something I’ve been thinking about lately is that, if Fukuzawa really does eventually die, and we get the Ranpo breakdown/corruption arc like the new op might be hinting at....... I really hope Mushitarou is a key person who can bring Ranpo back from his senses/save him. Considering that the perfect crime arc was when Ranpo’s Fyodor parallels were first shown, and Mushi’s arc is all about him learning to overcome grief..... I think it just makes sense in a lot of ways, and that it would be really moving to see Mushi try to help Ranpo overcome his loss, after how Ranpo initially helped him
#bungou stray dogs#......or maybe i really really just want Mushi back okay#but considering how much Asagiri loves him....... I think this is a possibility#yeah I know Yosano and Poe probably make more sense for people who could/should save Ranpo#but Mushi would understand........ he's already been put with Ango to empathize with him and now I want to see the same with Ranpo#Yosano would be just as much of a mess if Fukuzawa died tbh so I don't think she'd be in any position to save Ranpo at least not right away#and personally I want her character to have an emotional conclusion with Tachihara instead but that's just me#as for Poe........ yeah idk. I want Poe development and I think this would be an opportunity for him to realize Ranpo isn't perfect#but he wouldn't really be in a position to do much imo#that leaves Mushi as the perfect candidate in my eyes
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I wonder if when Mob put Emi's story back together if he used his new chlorokinesis ability to make the pages stay intact. I highly doubt that telekinesis alone would cause the pieces to stay together once he stopped exerting power on it, but manipulating the cellulose to stick together again? That would do it
#shiego kagayama#mob psycho 100#mp100#Idk if you could actually manipulate cellulose in dead plant tissues but that is the only logical conclusion I have for that scene#And considering he just learned that he could do that it makes perfect sense that he would utilize it there
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Finally caved and admitted to myself that I don't like being gendered as masculine. I will be updating my pronouns sometime tonight!! I'm still not sure if I want to use neopronouns, but I am increasingly fond of it/its and pupself pronouns, so I might try those out for awhile :3 I've been settling for masculine terms since that's all I could get for so long, but I'm in a much better position now!! They/Them is still at the top of the list :3
#i mean if i had to pick between masc or fem i would rather be gendered masc but like. ugh. idk. in a perfect world i wouldnt be gendered <3#every time i edit my blog theme i always hesitate to update my pronouns. i keep leaving it alone and putting it off and making excuses#but like. he/they doesnt really make me happy. at least not in average context.#i would much prefer they/them as a starting ground than have people thinking im like. Man+.#idk he/him feels like overcompensating. does that make sense?#like i HAD to go from one end directly to the other. but now i can be comfy and move around a little more. ya know?#anyways gender rambling conclusion: i am a furry and i am bisexual. thanks for coming to my TED talk.#batty blogging#batty gender#text
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