#the page after this one is even funnier

[marsreds]

oh, i see, they're gonna be World's Worst Policyle now

[1spooky-dad]

Dracula daily type beat but you get emailed a case file that reports all scp events that have happened on that day, so you can get an idea of just how much shit is going on over there

[robocops-a-christ-allegory]

Positive Peacemaker post Peacemaker stealing Mitchell Black’s identity so bad that in suicide squad 2021 it is now canon that Chris was the one with Mitchell’s costume and HE was the one in LAW is the funniest fucking thing ever to me. He took that mans entire life

[todayisafridaynight]

DID YOU MISS THE EXAM... Either way I can believe in that superstition for a sec I'm so sorry 😭😭😭

NONO I TOOK IT. BARELY. I BARELY TOOK IT. I JUST THOUGHT CLASS WAS GOING TO BE NORMAL BUT NOPE <3<3<3

[laurellala-comics]

Ok, so we know that after Phoenix saw news articles about how Edgeworth had become a ruthless prosecutor but before Phoenix became a lawyer himself, he wrote letters to Edgeworth to try and get through to him and convince him that what he was doing was wrong. Do we think Edgeworth read the letters? Do we think he kept them? Realistically, I think he read the first one because he recognized Nick's name and was curious what he had to say, and then got angry and threw out all the subsequent letters without looking at them. But imagine if he had kept them, and after reuniting with Nick, went through them. I feel like that would be a good opportunity for drama.

I also wonder if Nick thinks Edgeworth read all his letters or not. Like if he said certain things in the letter and assumes Edgeworth knows them when they meet, it could lead to interesting miscommunication. Obviously you could do this in a ship context, but I think it'd be compelling from a friendship point of view as well. If Nick had emphasized how much respect he had for Edgeworth and how much he believes in his ability to do good in the world and how he cares deeply about helping Edgeworth realize that, and all Edgeworth does is tell him to go away and that he never wants to see him again, that that feels a lot more crushing if Nick thinks that Edgeworth read about him being vulnerable and honest and then just didn't care.

Honestly though, I feel like after not getting a response for awhile Nick would assume Edgeworth wasn't reading the letters and start getting pissy, and only continue to send the letters for the principle of the matter (Edgeworth will have to see the letter in his mailbox after all and be reminded of Nick's existence even if he doesn't read them). I could see him using the letters more as a way of shouting into the void about his feelings with no expectation of them being read. I imagine the first letter was a very mild and kind plea that Edgeworth remember his old friend and who he used to be, and then 10 letters later it's just one page with "bitch" written in big letters because Nick is So Done. In which case, it would actually be so much funnier if Edgeworth DID read all of them from the beginning. Maybe this is why he acted the way he did when Nick met him again.

[leftneb]

There is Something Seriously Wrong with this Logo..... Chapter Two

So. Lots of you have seen this post by my dear partner ( @lailau7904 ) in which the Williams F1 design team get absolutely torn to bits. In the case you haven't read it yet I highly recommend you do because a) it's really fucking funny and b) it makes what I'm about to tell you even funnier. Though you don't have to, this post touches on entirely different things still regarding this one goddamn logo.

The original post starts like this:

Innocent enough, we made an assumption in good faith that the logo displayed on the Wikipedia page would be the same one as the official version used by Williams. Buckle the fuck up because I'm about to tell you why that was the worst mistake we could have made.

Please. Please I beg of you keep reading this took YEARS off our lifespans. Like the original post was fun and all but it was merely the top of the iceberg. If this were an hbomberguy video this would be the part where he reveals that the background was a greenscreen the whole time. More below the cut!!! :333

The Truth

Already after only a few hours after hitting "post" on the dissection, people started pointing out to us that we'd missed an absolutely crucial detail on the Wikimedia page we got the logo from, pay careful attention:

See THIS?

Yeah this means that that image is not, and never was, the official logo of Williams. All along it had been the work of a Wikipedia user by the name of Juanchocarbonero. Here you can even see the (admittedly painful) history of the file as provided by Wikimedia, this image was uploaded all the way back in 2016, it even underwent an update when the team changed their colour scheme to a lighter blue without getting fucking fixed.

But to me the absolutely most painful part about this page is the "File Usage" section. Which gives you a quick preview of just how deep the goddamn disease that is this piece of graphic design sin really spreads.

And just to clarify: the official version of the logo used by Williams on merch etc is perfectly fine. It's a nice piece of graphic design. I still quite like it. But the story doesn't end there. Not even close.

Consequences

When you look up "williams logo" on Google the image provided by Wikimedia the very first result that pops up, if you're looking for a high-quality .png of this logo that, logically, is what you'll end up using. And I mean, why wouldn't you? What reason do you have not to use it? As long as you don't look to close (oops) it's a perfectly fine, high-definition, clean and transparent image of the logo! No shit people are going to use it!

But this raises a question: Why IS it the most widespread version of the logo? That's fucking weird isn't it? Surely if the actual logo used on ex.: the official Williams F1 website (which, again, is perfectly fucking fine) was available they would've just used that, right?

Now. Small problem. If you want you can go ahead and open whatever search engine you use, if you do that I'm gonna need you to type in "Williams logo" into the search bar, and just try finding a picture that is

of the actual official logo (you can tell the bootleg from the real thing by checking if the middle segment of the W has spiky ends or flat ones. We're looking for flat ones here)

high quality (no pixels or blurring visible to the naked eye)

a transparent png (none of that chequered background bullshit)

NOT a logo with any words (such as: Williams or Racing) visible in it. those don't count.

If you didn't feel like doing any of that, I'll just tell you the answer: you fucking can't. Nothing like that EXISTS. The closest I could get are these two, both of which are mid to ass quality, so they don't count either.

No sensible individual is going to scroll google search results for 5 minutes straight just so they can use a 200x200 image, especially when they think a perfect alternative is right there.

I even found several recoloured versions of the diseased logo, including one as a sticker on Redbubble! Fuck me that's a horrible sight!

The Search

Because I wrote the previous paragrahps after we'd figured out exactly what had happened, you might be under the impression that by this point in trying to answer the question "Why the fuck is that image on Wikipedia instead of, idk, the real fucking thing?" we'd at least established the existence of said "real Williams F1 logo". You'd be wrong, because for somewhere around 24 hours after we'd made the initial, horrifying discovery of just how fucked the Wikipedia version is, we genuinely could not tell if that was the official logo or not.

The ones displayed on their website weren't at all downloadable or even copyable, a non-ass quality of the damn thing just didn't seem to exist anywhere, so we didn't dare draw any conclusions. And we were still foolishly operating on the assumption that Wikipedia wouldn't just lie to us. (this is why your teachers hate it when you use it a source btw. like this is the ONE time it's actually been reasonable)

So, in the hopes of finding the offical Williams Racing logo, the non-scuffed one because clearly it exists, somewhere, we consulted an expert on Intellectual Property: my mother!

What this "consultation" actually roughly looked like was: we went on a walk and I started rambling about the Situation from Last Night before she cut me off and pulled up the website of the World Intellectual Property Organisation, aka the place they store all the Copyright information of like, everything.

BEHOLD:

(pictured; THE ACTUAL FUCKING LOGO I CANNOT BELIEVE IT'S EXISTED THIS WHOLE TIME)

Link to the actual real official legal document because goddamn this rabbithole just kept getting deeper so I like, have that now.

For refence, here is the official copyrighted version and the Wikimedia file overlayed on top of each other. As you can tell, it's disgusting. It's a poor, eyeballed imitation at best.

The copyrighted logo is horrifically low quality because, guess what, that image also isn't downloadable or copyable from the page. I really really cannot blame Juanchocarbonero for uploading his own version to Wikimedia because there legitimately does not exist a version of this logo that is freely available to the public. Like that goddamn abomiation is all we have. It's the effort that counts I guess.

My mother suggested that a possible reason for this could be avoiding the production of knockoff merch, or at least making it recognisable in case it is sold. Think about it, when your logo Doesn't Exist online, no one can use it without a license! It's kind of genius! I'm also about 99% sure they didn't orchestrate it so, it was good luck I guess?

interlude: How the FUCK does Copyright even work

I did immediately think to myself "we should REALLY fix the wikipedia version, like, stat" because I cannot in good conscience have this information available to me and not do anything with it, for the good of the people. However, this poses an issue: was the logo really not scuffed on purpose? Could it be that that version uploaded to Wikipedia isn't a 1:1 of the official logo because of copyrighting issues? To find out I had to look deeper, by comparing the official, website-available logos of various other F1 teams I came to conclusion that: [........................]

Yeah so I wrote that paragraph before actually checking for refences, but even after probably an hour of trying very hard to make sense of the copyright documents and copyright law in general we could not make sense of any of it. According to my mother (again, the closest we have to an expert, like she actually works with copyright in the context of companies but she's not specifically an IP expert. just to clarify) it's actually a lot worse for Wikipedia to have a falsified version of the Williams logo, than it would be to use the copyrighted version. This is because they're spreading misinformation by pretending that's the actual logo. And yet.

According to the Copyright Tag (the one on the top) in the Licensing section of the Wikimedia page for the thing pretending to be the Williams F1 logo, it's fine to use it because just a bunch of shapes. The thing is however, that it says that for pretty much every F1 team's logo, most of which are sourced straight from the official website. So this doesn't really mean anything tbh. According to our local expert (still my mother) it's fucking confusing. So I've decided to leave that at that.

update October 20th: as far as the Wikimedia pages on copyrighting tell me, uploading the official logo could, potentially, get me into serious legal trouble with Williams because of copyright laws. Which is still confusing because as said, every other team's logo is sitting uncontested on their respective Wikipedia pages. So basically we still don't know.

Okay. Backtrack. We forgot to ask something very important:

HOW?

HOW does one fuck up a perfectly fine logo THAT BAD.

WHY does one make their own scuffed tracejob and HOW does it end up like THAT. Clearly something must have gone horrifically wrong for it to end up like that.

I have a theory as to what might have happened:

It was either drawn or painted by hand, for a physical paintjob it's actually sort of impressively precise, but still objectively fucked. For a while I outright refused to believe that it could have been done in a digital program with the types of mistakes that were made, but you'll see this theory (partially) disproven later on so I retract it for now.

Operating on the assumption that it wasn't done digitally, a likely theory could be one involving a picture of scan of the paintjob. If the picture was taken at an angle or the logo itself was on a curved surface that COULD potentially explain the weird sort of slide everything has to it.

From then the picture might have been inserted into a digital art program, and the area of the logo might have been automatically selected using the magic wand tool, which could explain the weird growth at the top and that odd rounded off corner.

We also drew the conclusion that the file itself had been "tampered with" (aka cropped manually) by a human, because no computer would generate a resolution of 3356x2543 (you can that this is the original resolution on the Wikimedia page)

WAIT HOLD ON IS THAT IT?

The question of how the Fuck this guy managed to mess up the logo, and even more specifically why some edges were fine and some weren't (ant colony looking thing on the top left) bothered us so much that I at one point started just looking up "WIlliams logo" with the results filtered down to pre-2017 in an attempt to find when exactly the messed up logo was created. As if that would be any help.

Now what I definitely didn't expect to find was THIS

ENHANCE

Yes, you're seeing it right, THAT is the original 'Williams logo with the fucked up arm angles and lenghts'. Which PROVES that, contrary to our previous belief, Juancocarbonero was NOT the origin of the mistakes. Instead it was [checks notes] a DeviantArt user by the name of Nerdkid56?

The original DeviantArt post, which as of 9:47pm CET on the 13th of October 2024 I am about 90% sure is the actual first appearanace of the scuffed logo, is from May of 2015, which lines up well with the original upload date of the fucked up logo onto Wikipedia (November 2016). At the time that DeviantArt post was almost the only source for the logo.

And in the case you needed any convincing that those two logos are the same, here they are overlayed. You may notice that it's one shape (excluding the rounded corner which isn't visible at this resolution.)

This discovery is essential to understanding why the current scuffed version is the way it is. You might remember our confusion about the way some edges are fine while some are attempting to leave the image, the whole thing is a weird Frankensteinian amalgamation of vectors and magic wand mistakes. With this knowledge we can now assume that the mistakes happened in 2 layers:

Nerdkid56: likely just eyeballed the proportions. I'd guess he drew one arm before the other and flipped it around without really checking the angles. Also didn't give a shit about whether the arms lined up with the base or not. Legitimately bad design made in a digital program.

Juancocarbonero: why he used the scuffed W logo instead of the normal ones that were also perfectly accessible by 1 goddamn Google search is a mistery. HOW he even got access to it is another question I do not think we'll have answers to. And I've already explained some of the things we think may be responsible for the uneveness and bumps. Point is he fucked it up even more.

My theory for why Juanchocarbonero used the scuffed version instead of any other available picture goes like this: it was the only png he could find. Practically every other search result for "Williams Logo" that predates 2017 is a jpeg or absolute ass quality (sometimes both for good measure) so, despite it's flaws, Nedkid56's trace of it could have been the best option available at the time (the quality is actually very very good since it's a vector image, and I guess our friend Juanchocarbonero doesn't have an eye for design considering he didn't notice uhm, everything that is wrong with that model.)

Conclusion

The only way to right these wrongs is to go back, to the very beggining of this saga. Wikipedia. Williams I'm so sorry for what you've had to endure. I know what I have to do now. When I eventually make a proper vector image of the official logo and upload it to Wikimedia it'll all be over. And I WILL do it (but not rn this has already robbed me of like 3 whole days of my life. soon)

All of this is, admittedly inconsequental, but also absolutely fucking hilarious. Like imagine. you. one single guy, you make ONE mistake in a silly little "tracing this logo" project because you couldn't be arsed to check the angles of a silly little W. And some other guy, who you likely don't even know, over a whole ass year later, takes your flawed piece of design, makes it even worse somehow and uploads it to a site from which your little tiny innocent mistake becomes the most widespread version of a logo used by an actual real company worth over 700 Million US Dollars. HOW. HOW DID THAT HAPPEN. WHY HAS NO ONE FIXED THIS??? IT'S BEEN 9 YEARS

Just to give you a final look on just how widespread this plague is, here are some examples of media the fucked up version of the logo is featured in:

this Mr V's Garage video (the original reason we started this conversation in the first place)

the thumbnails of these two videos by Tommo, this one by FP1Will, and this one by RicksF1Addiction

such an amount of random places. likely fanmerch and fanart, and like, pretty much any place someone wanted to use the logo. it's everywhere. if you've ever had the Williams logo displayed in anything you've made I can guarantee you 99.9% chance you used the fucked version

and late thank you to everyone ( @bumblewyn @mid-nighttiger @vro0m @lemonsgovroom @mikraas @leclerced fucking hell I kept needing to add people to this list because compiling all of this took absurdly long) who pointed out our misconception in the reblogs of the original post and contributed to us actually looking into this further. and sorry to everyone for accidentally spreading misinformation lmao (it's too funny not to have been worth it tho) (ALSO it's not really our fault is it)

and to keep the tradition of ending on a live discord reaction:

[yumeka-sxf]

One thing I love about the SxF manga volumes is how the inside covers have extra illustrations that reveal a "hidden" side of the characters. My favorite so far is from volume 10, which shows young Twilight surrounded by war paraphernalia. But on the inside cover, he's instead surrounded by fun & family ❤

In addition, the inside covers are also full of humor and 4th-wall breaking jokes. In this case for volume 10, the back inner cover shows Franky complaining that he wasn't featured with everyone else, despite being Twilight's friend and being "cute" as a child 😆 Sylvia and Henderson concur with their own childhood photos, lol.

Volume 5 and 6 feature Yuri and Nightfall, again, with the inner covers showing their "real" thoughts. For Yuri, torturing Loid into signing a divorce certificate, and for Nightfall, getting a marriage certificate from him!

The back inner covers of these volumes even feature their unhinged dialogue! On the left is Yuri's endless thoughts about Yor, and on the right is a big "す"/"su," which is basically the "lo" in "love" that Nightfall always has for Twilight!

Volume 7 features Damian, with the inner cover showing Anya doing a hilarious impression of him!

Lots of 4th-wall breaking with volume 9! Becky is featured, and on the inner cover, Martha is chiding her for not wearing her school uniform, since Anya and Damian both wore theirs on their featured covers. Becky replies that she doesn't want to wear black after finally getting to be in color! 😂

The back inner cover is even funnier! It shows the staff list that's usually featured at the end of each volume, but it's not typically on the back cover. So Becky is mad about it being there, saying that the space should be used to feature more things about her, and who the heck are these Kimura and Rin people!? 🤣 (two of the staff members). Franky replies that unfortunately the pages were condensed this time, but she should be grateful to those people, since she wouldn't be in the book if it wasn't for them!

Even the inner cover of the manga fanbook has the same 4th-wall breaking humor! Yor asks why they're doing "air chairs" instead of having real chairs, and Loid replies that there was no budget for the usual designer chairs (he also asks if Anya got a new power since she's floating! 😅)

To conclude, Endo's wonderful sense of humor is showcased even outside the story itself! I look forward to seeing what characters and jokes are featured in upcoming manga volumes 😁

[yellowflwrss]

ALL JOKES; luke hughes

• based when luke was still playing at umich

• you decide to play a little prank on your bf where you call him your brother after you kiss him

you were on tik tok way too much. and luke was too but definitely not as much as you. he wasn’t on it to the point where he saw the lastest couple pranks when they were still very popular. so of course as his amazing girlfriend you had to pull a little prank on your boyfriend whom you loved so much.

you were sitting on the couch in the house luke shared with some of his hockey buddies. a few of them were sat on other parts of the couch watching tv with heir girlfriends who were going from talking with you and then talking with their respective boyfriends while you sat with a single headphone in on tik tok. luke had sat next to you mere moments before until he had to use the bathroom.

it was perfect timing because that’s when the tik tok pulled up on your “for you page” and gave you the idea to mess with your boyfriend.

the tik tok was of a girlfriend next to her boyfriend. she said some words and then turned to him, he kissed her and she said the words to the camera: “best big brother ever!” and he started laughing.

obviously, you began to think how luke would react to this and knew you had to film this tik tok for yourself.

luke walked out from the bathroom and began to walk over to you till you stood up “babe come here.” you told luke and like a puppy he followed you into the kitchen which was right next to the living room.

you set up your phone and turned to luke who looked at you confused. in the corner of your eye you could also see mark, ethan, seamus and gavin giving y’all some questionable looks. everyone else payed somewhat attention to the both of you with their eyes still trained on the tv.

“okay so when i turn around just kiss me.” you smile up at luke. he was pretty tall compared to you (actually very tall compared to you) so to the camera it was a funny shot.

“okay..” luke gave you a suspicious glance as he watched you step forward to press play. when you backed up in front of luke you began to giggle which made the boys in the living room chuckle and luke laugh at you suspiciously, he knew you had something planned.

“if you wanna get to me, you have to get through him first.” you managed to get out through your giggles.

“preach!” one of the boys yelled from the living room, the culprit being duke tucker. mark let out a laugh at this. the two knew this tik tok and had their eyes glued to the scene.

you turned around to luke and on cue he gave you a kiss. he tried to make it go on for longer but because of the audience before you and the fact that you were in the middle of a tik tok, you broke the kiss and turned back to the camera. “best big brother ever.” you tried to keep a straight face. from behind you both, the boys broke out in laughter and you wish you could rewatch luke’s reaction over and over again like it was the first time.

his jaw dropped as he looked at you and then proceeded to look around awkwardly. “i am not your brother.” his lack of words made the event even funnier to you and all his friends as well. the girls were laughing too and it made the scene all the greater.

luke didn’t know what to do so he grabbed your waist from behind and pulled you into a bear hug “brother?” he laughed “brother?” he repeated, still in disbelief.

“woah big bro you’re getting a little too close there.” luca shouted.

“shut up.” luke laughed as he kissed you “look at what you started.”

“STOP KISSING YOUR SISTER LUKE.”

“SHUT THE FUCK UP.”

[directdogman]

Dogman, how do you write SO WELL!?!? I love all your characters and I need to know what/where you find inspo from...

Ha. Every writer is just someone who apes the creative processes of their inspirations. For video game writing specifically, there's two answers for me.

Toby Fox is always gonna be a huge inspiration for me. I've written plots and characters before and had to abandon ideas after realizing I'd accidentally written part of UT again. Even some of the ideas I used were undeniably inspired by UT in a subconscious way and ofc, I included several explicit references to UT in my last series. Toby's a very clever guy who likely pays very close attention to the art he consumes and tries to figure out how to maximize how much his work connects with his audience. Whatever his process is, it works.

The other answer is a lil funnier: Scott Cawthon, but specifically the legend, not the man. For context: Back in the earlier days of the FNaF fandom, people had a hyper-inflated view of Scott Cawthon's writing skills that largely came from how little of a presence he had back in those days. In the vacuum of Scott actually explaining his own process in detail, people got caught up in his genuinely creative way of hiding exposition in his games using cryptid and (then) unexpected methods, and a narrative formed (one that he's since refuted.)

While he never implied it tmk, fans broadly believed that he constructed these sweeping and complex narratives with tons of cohesive moving parts, with the games essentially acting like the mere tip of his lore iceberg. People even thought he wrote so much that he had whole games worth of lore outlined from the beginning! In the first Dawko interview he gave, he clarified that this wasn't the case and explained roughly what his process was (basically just outlining rough theme ideas + aesthetics for future titles.)

However, that legend made younger-me's mind run wild and any time I wrote a story, it became very difficult for me to not keep writing down ideas while completing the grunt work that followed me finishing my scripts. When I finished DSaF 1, I already had DSaF 2's draft written and by the time 2 was done, I had enough lore for a 3rd game on paper (and a lot more stuff that I didn't use.) By the time three was out, I had pages upon pages of unused concepts/story ideas and more or less just had to decide to call it quits or else I'd be pumping out entries forever!

That's why if you go back to those older games, there's references that directly refer to future plot-points in pretty casual/easy to miss ways. (Like Henry's mention in DSaF 1, Dave being heartless in DSaF 2, Jack being soulless in 1, and even Blackjack being Jack's soul in 2. Most of 3's major plotpoints are implied somewhere in 2 and some of 2's in 1.)

DT is much the same. By the time I finished writing it, I had fairly detailed drafts for arcs for each of the characters, some early material ended up getting completely recontextualized (and even modified in small ways to not conflict with the wider ideas I came up with.)

I get really into writing my stories/characters and I always wonder exactly how things ended up where they are, what characters think about but don't say, etc etc. This is why I have an obscene amount of Crown lore that I have very little to do with rn (since he impacted the whole world so deeply.)

This extra stuff also includes plenty of sequel material ideas, though I didn't think I'd even get a chance to use them since DT performed pretty meagerly before the big release and I was expecting to have to move onto something new. Though it turned out that Scott didn't actually write his games this way (by his own admission), it's the correct answer for what my core writing inspiration for writing game narratives is.

Hope this helps!

[miupow]

౨ৎ⋆ ˚｡⋆ study night .ᐟ c.sb ⊹˚. ♡

╰┈➤ soobin just wants to know what you're reading, is all.

pairing. choi soobin x fem!reader rating. NSFW, MDNI! words. 3.8k warnings. soft dom!soobin, erotic literature, praise kink, degrading, spanking, sunoo from enhypen cameo! vaginal fingering, soobin cums in his pants lol

thank you to @mapofthemazeinthemirror for helping me recover my first fic

“what are you reading?” soobin asked from across your dorm bedroom, sprawled out over a beanbag. he hadn’t looked up from the laptop in his lap for nearly two hours, too invested in his chemistry essay, and you were surprised to glance up and see him peering at you from over his screen. you could see him squinting his eyes to read the cover of the book you were holding, blind as a bat even with his thick rimmed glasses on— you giggled, shook your head and turned the page. you had caught up on assignments far quicker than soobin had, so you had decided to quietly read one of your favorite novels while he finished.

you and soobin had study nights every thursday after classes; a couple of hours for the two of you to help each other with assignments and throw pencils at each other. these nights had been routine since you and soobin met freshman year— you needed help in calculus, and he relied on you entirely to keep his literature grade above a D. plus, you were both quiet and shy, and it was just easier for the two of you to study with each other. soobin stayed in his corner, on your roommate sunoo’s beanbag, you stayed sitting cross-legged on your bed, and you worked in comfortable silence unless either of you needed help. you really enjoyed thursday nights; if only sunoo would stop making such a fuss about leaving for a few hours…

“...yn?” soobin prodded again, head tilted like a confused puppy. you had looked up from your novel but hadn’t said anything, lost in thought— your head had been all over the place since your argument with sunoo right before he left. you wondered briefly if soobin had noticed.

“oh! sorry— i’m reading, um…” you looked down at the open pages of your novel, and it struck you then, far too late, just what exactly you were reading. you shut the book quickly, ears red, “you wouldn’t like it.”

“why wouldn’t i like it?” soobin asked around a mouthful of chips. 

You shrugged, trying your best to look nonchalant. “‘cause.”

soobin gave you a funny look, turned his head back to his essay, and then turned back to give you another, funnier look. 

“what’s it about?”

“don’t worry about it.” you replied far too quickly, sounding guilty as hell. you gingerly placed the book on your nightstand, cover down— soobin blinked at you a couple of times, big brown eyes magnified behind his glasses, and then blinked a couple of times at the book on the nightstand. you really didn’t like the look on his face. 

“don’t you do it!” you warned, not sounding very threatening at all, and soobin gave you an absolutely evil grin. 

soobin leapt from the beanbag in a flash, laptop tumbling to the floor— you shrieked at the top of your lungs, lunging across the bed to grab the book before he did, but soobin’s arms were just so long. he snatched the book with ease, cackling like a fiend as you jumped from the bed to grab it from him— he held the novel above his head with one long arm, the other trying to keep you from climbing him like a tree. 

“soobin! stop it! let me have it! i’m serious! quit it!” you begged, embarrassed nearly to the point of tears as you hopped up and down in an attempt to grab the book from soobin. 

“i just wanna read it! lemme see!” 

six and a half feet up in the air, way above your head and much to your horror, soobin open your book to the bookmarked page and started reading aloud. you smacked him square in the chest, but neither his breath or his smile faltered— god, this man was huge, and it infuriated you. “i followed my boss to his office, watching in bated breath as he rounded his big wooden desk to sit down at his chair. i had made three typing errors on one of his letters, clutched tight in my hand, and my boss seemed madder about it than usual. “put that—“

“stop!” you whined, hitting him across the chest again. you had given up trying to jump for the book. “it’s just a book, it’s not that—“

“if it was just a book you wouldn’t be freaking the fuck out right now,” soobin giggled maniacally. his glasses were slipping down his nose, mostly because you were hitting him, so he leaned his head farther back to read. you briefly considered pulling at his hair, but that felt too cruel. “put the letter on my desk” my boss said.” soobin began again, turning becaus you had started clawing at his neck and arms. “so i did—“

“give me back my book!”

“so i did.” soobin continued, that time not even sparing you a glance. he had started using a stupid little voice for the when the boss spoke, which would have been funny if you weren’t so mortified. “now bend over with your elbows on my desk so that you are looking directly at the letter. keep your face very close.”

“stop it, i mean it!” if he continued reading any further… you felt like crawling into a ditch and dying. 

“if you said it’s just a book i wanna read it!” soobin retorted, evil little smile still plastered on his face. he gave you a sweet, sweet evil smile before turning back to the pages, unfazed by your teary eyes and red cheeks. “i was puzzled, but followed instructions, bending over the top of his desk so that my chest, belly and arms were pressed against the hardwood. my nose was merely a centimeter or two from the letter, which made it hard to read. my skirt was starting to.. to slide up the backs of my thighs, but i was sure if i moved to tug it back down i would just get in more trouble.”

you grimaced when soobin’s voice broke, smile starting to slide off of his face. “now read the letter to yourself. read it over and over again.” my boss said. i read: “dear mr garvy, i am very grateful to you for referring…” at the word “referring”, he— he.. um. oh.”

you started to feel less like wanting to die and more like you were actually dying. soobin stared hard at the pages for a few seconds, ears turning cherry red, but to your surprise and absolute humiliation, he actually began to read aloud again. his voice had dropped that cheerful quality, though, winded like had been hit upside the head. “at the word “referring”, which i had mispelled, he reeled his arm back and spanked me hard. i stopped reading with a loud gasp, shocked— the sting reverberated through my core, fiery hot, and in spite of my embarrassment i began to soak through my panties. at my silence, i was spanked again, even harder. “i said read it,” my boss reminded me, “be a good girl and follow instructions.”

lowering the book, soobin looked down at you with a very red face and an unreadable expression. “you… you actually read this stuff?”

you quickly grabbed the novel from him before haphazardly placing it on your nightstand. “it’s none of your business.” you snip.

“i mean— i didn’t— i didn’t think you liked that kind of stuff.” soobin admitted rather quietly, watching with wide eyes as you angrily collected your scattered study supplies. you dropped your papers into random folders and notebooks before shoving them along with your laptop into your bag— it was a disorganized mess now, but you’d just fix it later. you were too worked up to take your time. 

“so? what, do you think i’m gross now?” you snapped back, embarrassment falling away to irritation. “i told you you didn’t want to read it. just drop it already!” 

“i don’t think you’re gross!” soobin defended rather quickly, to which you raised an eyebrow. “i mean— i don’t care, it’s whatever. i’m just, like… i don’t know, it’s not a big deal.” 

“so drop it.”

soobin sighed, moving slowly to go sit back in sunoo’s beanbag. “okay, fine, i’m dropping it, it’s dropped. i’m sorry, okay?”

you just rolled your eyes. after getting over the initial embarrassment and irritation of the situation, you were ready to just move on with the night. “whatever. are you almost done with that stupid essay? i want takeout.” 

you hadn’t seen soobin in six days. normally that wouldn’t bother you— you had lives— but your next study night was quickly approaching, and you were growing more and more worried soobin wouldn’t show. maybe you should call him, just to apologize…

“maybe he’s just being a prude,” sunoo had supplied helpfully, biting into his sandwich. he had offered you half, as he always did when you had lunch together, but you had turned him down. the idea of eating made your stomach turn. “he probably thinks you’re mad at him and you’re gonna spank him for it.”

you huffed at your roommates giggling, drumming your fingers against the cafe table. “he knows me better than that. i feel like he’s the one mad at me.”

“what would he be mad at you for? being horny?” sunoo snickered. 

“i don’t know… what if he doesn’t want to spend thursdays with me anymore?”

“soobin? stop going to your little dates? doubt it.”

“they’re not dates.” you snapped, voice raised just slightly— you were tired of having this argument with sunoo every time you talked to him about soobin. “we’re just hanging out and studying. he doesn’t even like me like that.”

“oh, so you like him like that then?”

“no! ugh, sunoo, just— whatever! you’re not helping.” you glared angrily down at your iced coffee. you loved sunoo to death, really, but sometimes you just couldn’t stand him— no matter how many times you told him you and soobin were just friends, he would never believe you. 

sunoo giggled again, clearly enjoying your mounting irritation. “okay, okay, i’m sorry. if you’re that worried about it, you could just go and apologize to him yourself.” 

that was the first actual advice sunoo had given in a while. “i don’t even know where he is, though.”

“oh, that’s easy.” sunoo supplied happily. “he’s in his dorm playing video games with his friends. he plays with heeseung-hyung a lot, and that’s what he’s doing right now, so—“

“thank you, sunoo! you know i love you,” you jumped out of your chair to give him a chaste peck on the cheek before gathering up your things and dashing out of the cafe in the direction of soobin’s dorm. you hadn’t even given sunoo the time to finish his sentence. 

“hey, wait, don’t forget your coffee!—“

you didn’t give yourself time to think about knocking on soobin’s door, because you knew if you gave yourself the chance to run away you would take it. he opened the door within seconds— scaring the shit out of you, honestly— messy bed hair and thick glasses framing eyes that looked like a cornered deer. “oh! uh, hey, yn, um—“

“i’m sorry!” you squeaked, cutting him off. you needed to get this out as fast as possible so you could just move on with your life. “i’m sorry i got mad at you last thursday! over the book.“

soobin blinked. “oh. um. alright.”

you both shared a very long, awkward look.

“alright?!” you echoed, growing more irritated by the second. “you’ve been ignoring me for days and all you have to say it alright?!”

soobin’s eyes flickered around anxiously, and it suddenly hit you that you were yelling at him in a public hallway. “i’m not ignoring you—“

“bullshit!” you shrieked. this really wasn’t how you were planning on his apology to go. you opened your mouth to continue, face red with anger, but soobin quickly grabbed your wrist and roughly pulled you into his dorm. you were shocked into silence, eyes wide and mouth agape as he dragged you all the way back to his bedroom. 

“where’s beomgyu?” you asked anxiously, desperate to deflate the tension. the lack of soobin’s roommate screaming at his tv as he played video games only fueled the  anxious pit in your stomach— it was never quiet in this dorm.

“he’s with his girlfriend— does it matter? we need to talk.” soobin let go of your wrist to close his bedroom door, giving you the space you needed to remind yourself that this was just soobin, who ate gummy bears two at a time so they wouldn’t die alone. there was really no reason to feel so jittery�� right?

“talk about what?” you ask, attitude back now that you’ve calmed yourself down. soobin was still staring very intently at his doorknob, back turned to you. “why you’ve been avoiding me all week? listen, it’s okay if that book wasn’t up your alley. there’s nothing wrong with being vanilla— there really isn’t any need to get all weird about it. i’m not gonna, like, spank you or anything. we don’t have to talk about it ever again, if you don’t want to, just pretend it didn’t happen—“

“it’s because i want to spank you!” soobin interjected very suddenly, spinning to look at you with wild eyes. his face was bright red. 

“you… what?” you must’ve misheard him. that was the only explanation, surely; there was no way he—

“i can’t stop thinking about it! i thought there was no way you’d be into that stuff, there was no way, but you go and pull this crazy shit and now i can’t go a single second without thinking about putting you over my knee! it’s driving me insane! i can’t even look at you!” 

you opened and closed your mouth a couple of times, surely looking like a fish out of water— this was the absolute last thing you expected to come out of your friend’s mouth. your eyes were wide, your face burned… your pussy clenched pathetically. it came crashing down on you all at once, then, just how horribly you were lying when you said you didn’t have feelings for soobin. you truly never believed he liked you back, however, sure he was too busy playing video games and trying his best to pass his classes. it was like a dream, almost, which might have been why you suddenly felt so brazen— if you wanted soobin, and he wanted you, who were you to deny him?

“then do it.” you said, voice barely above a whisper. soobin looked just as shocked as you were. “if you want to do it that bad, do it.”

soobin moved in a flash, giving you no time to prepare— within seconds you were thrown over his lap, hair hanging in your face as you stared wildly at the carpet. soobin brushed one of his hands against your skirt-clad ass, barely a brush of his fingers, but you still gasped all the same. “do you really want this?” soobin asked, voice low, breathing hard— the outline of his hard cock pressed against your stomach, making it considerably hard to focus, but you still managed to choke out a “yes please.”

soobin stutters out an uneven breath, his fingers inching down to the hem of your skirt, teasing the tops of your thighs for just a moment before pulling the skirt up to expose your ass. “so pretty..” soobin breathed. you felt his cock twitch against your stomach, those long fingers coming back to trace along the edge of your lacy thong. “is it okay if i take your panties off, bunny?”

you whimpered, nodding your head— soobin landed a gentle slap to the junction of your thigh with a chuckle. “use your words like a good girl.”

this couldn’t actually be happening. you had to be dreaming, or hallucinating, or something— silly goofy soobin, your friend who cried watching toy story, was just way too good at this, making your legs shake and your pussy throb while hardly touching you.  in an afternoon your reality had shifted from thinking that soobin had to be the worlds biggest virgin to thinking that soobin is the world’s hottest dominant. 

you weren’t sure how to feel about it, honestly, but your cunt sure did. 

you must’ve stayed silent for too long, because without much warning soobin landed a much harsher spank to the top of your asscheek. “bad girl! c’mon baby, use your big girl words. tell me how much you want it.” soobin goaded, hot breath fanning your ear— you couldn’t hold in your moan, sounding weak and pathetic even to your own ears. 

“p-please… please take my panties off. please spank me.” you whined, face beet red and pussy drooling, making a noticeable wet spot in your pretty little panties— soobin’s deft finger stroked slowly up and down your folds, feeling the wetness seep through. you wanted to scream. 

“that’s my good bunny,” you could hear your panties rip as soobin tore them off of you in one fluid motion, cold air meeting your soaked cunt and making you— and soobin— hiss. it was still and silent for a few fleeting moments, soobin admiring the slick leaking down your thigh, before he straightened up and landed a stinging, eye watering spank deliciously close to your core. it took everything in you to bite back a pathetic yelp.

“that’s for being a fucking tease,” soobin started, soothing your reddening flesh with a soft caress of his palm. “being so fucking hot all the time and convincing me you were out of my league.”

you hadn’t realized that this was confessional. giving soobin an evil smile over your shoulder, you smart, “you’re an idiot. i’ve wanted you forever.”

another spank, this time with even more force. your hips bucked with a shrill cry, eyes watering— you had no idea soobin was this strong. he refused to give you time to prepare. “didn’t say you could talk back.”

you’re on the verge of tears from the red hot stinging in your ass, but you still giggle at soobin’s words. “you’re kinky.”

soobin just rolls his eyes that time, spanking you again. “and this one’s for being a brat. how about you start counting for me, love— one.”

“one?! you’ve hit me four times!” maybe you were pushing it too far, but it just came naturally to you to fight back in some way. you relished losing.

soobin grabbed a handful of your hair and yanked hard, making you gasp loudly and your pussy clench painfully around nothing. leaning down close to your ear, soobin let out a warning growl— “i said fucking count.”

you swore you’ve never been this wet in your life. torn between bucking your hips into soobin’s bulge and pushing back onto his hand, you give a quiet, watery whimper of “one.”

the hand holding your hair lets go at once, letting your head fall limply over his knee. “that’s my girl.” 

another spank. you moan. “two.” 

“three.” you’re crying now. soobin’s hand lingers, fingers ghosting over your sticky folds… you shift your hips and open your thighs to give him access. 

four never comes. soobin pushes two long, thick fingers between your folds, stuttering out a low moan like he was the one being touched. he starts a rough, dizzying pace almost immediately, fingertips searching for that spongy spot… you grind your hips back against soobin’s fingers, a drooling mess against his jeans. “bin…” you whined high in your throat— you needed more, you needed him to slow down, you needed him to go faster… you hadn’t been touched like this in ages.

soobin finds your g-spot with ease, and you have to cover your own mouth to keep yourself from screaming. “such a slut, falling apart just because of my fingers…” soobin chuckled huskily, enamored with the wet sounds your cunt made filling the room. “i’ve thought about this forever, god… you’re just as pretty as i thought you’d be.”

you open your mouth to respond, but a strangled moan comes out instead— soobin’s thumb, wet from your arousal, came down to rub tight, delicious circles on your clit, distracting you enough to push in a third finger into your stretched out hole. the stretch burned but you loved it, hips kicking and moans weak as soobin took you apart. 

“...too much..” you manage to choke out, practically biting down on soobin’s thigh to keep from wailing in bliss. you felt full to the brim, pushed closer and closer to the edge with every rough flick of your clit and thrust of his curled fingers— soobin just giggled meanly, fluttering a fourth thick finger around your stretched and soaked hole.

“oh, bunny, if this is too much there’s no way you’ll be able to take my cock…” 

tears streamed freely down your face, choked sobs wracking your poor little body, but god you were in heaven… you bucked your hips down against soobin’s own bulge, relishing in the sharp intakes of breath he would take every time— he was starting to fall apart too, sounding a lot less dominating and a lot more pathetic with each roll of his hips up into your tummy. “gonna… gonna make you cum on my fingers,” soobin whined low in his throat, hand completely soaked in your arousal. “you gonna make a mess for me?”

soobin’s fingers dug impossibly and wonderfully hard into your sweet spot, that white-hot band of desire in your stomach winding tighter and tighther with each perfectly aimed thrust. you sobbed, hand reaching back to grab tight onto soobin’s shirt sleeve. “‘m gonna cum!”

soobin’s other hand, that had been stroking comfortingly up and down your back, reached down to pinch hard at you clit, making you scream— “gotta ask first, bad girl, gotta ask for permission b-before you cum…” soobin’s voice was starting to break, his hips stuttering helplessly— the feeling of his hard cock grinding hard against you only added to the fire in your belly. 

“can i cum? please binnie, can i cum? i’ll be a good girl, i promise, just let me cum!” you had no control over your mouth, hardly any conscious at all… all you could focus on was the tightening in your belly, the way soobin’s fingers fucked your pussy so good… you were his brainless whore, fucked dumb on his fingers. 

“go on honey, my good girl, my bunny… cum all over me, make a mess.” with his permission you let yourself fall off the edge, moaning like a whore as you soaked your thighs, soobin’s hands and his jean-clad thigh. you laid across soobin’s lap twitching for quite some time afterwards, heaving breaths like you ran a marathon… you’d never come before like that in your life. soobin was with you the whole way, too— sweet as can be as he cooed praises into your hair, petting your back and kissing your head as you came down from your high. you kind of loved him, you realized with a sickening start. 

you also realzied around the same time that you no longer felt soobin’s bulge poking at you. you released your iron grip on soobin’s sleeve to gently cup his very wet crotch. “bin…?”

“sorry, bunny… couldn’t help it…”

[alexwritingspot]

hii ! i LOVED your percy x reader sm!! and your writing is BEAUTIFUL !

ik you just posted recently but could you do percy x gn!reader with prompt 9? and possibly make it enemies to lovers? <3

Maybe even enemies can love each others…

prompt 9: “are you flirting with me? Took you long enough to understand it”

A shared punishment imposed by Mr. D, by the side of the great Percy Jackson leads you to finally face all the feeling that you had hid for so long…

A/n: Omg! Thank you so much! 😭😭😭 you have no idea how much this comment means to me, you literally made my day 🧡🧡 I’m not an English native speaker, so I’m always doubting about both my writing and my language skills, so having a compliment like this is just very appreciated! As always the prompt list is on my page. words count: 800

warnings: maybe cursing? Other than that none

——————————————————————————————————

It wasn’t like you totally hated Percy Jackson. He saved your life more than once and was after all a nice guy. But he got under your skin, a whole lot. You hated how everyone at camp saw him as the perfect guy, the handsome boy with a golden heart who saved Olympus twice and had chosen to refuse immortality to help the camp, heck, even his fatal flaw was a merit! But you hated it because it wasn’t absolutely like that… ok, maybe it was. But you hated how no one pointed out his flaws.

So here you were, forced to a shared punishment with the son of Poseidon because you two had ‘disturbed’ Mr. D’s breakfast with your bickering. You pulled up your sleeves and put on a pair of gloves waiting for the torture to end. You two had to wash the breakfast dishes in the camp’s kitchen and you both were left alone since Mr. D had left.

You watched the water pour from the sink faucet as you held out an hand and waited for Percy to pass you a plate… except he didn’t. When you turned he was juggling with some apples found around. You let out a tired sigh “have you finished messing around or do I have to clean up all of this by myself?” Annoyance dripping from your voice. With a single move he stopped throwing the apples in the air and put them down on a near wooden table “you should enjoy your life more, you know?” He teased, a smirk was playing on his lips and Oh gods, how much you’d like to smack it out of his sneering face! But you couldn’t, so you simply turned your glare back to the sink and said nothing else, you had to bite your tongue to not retort back.

He then came closer to the counter with a pile of dirty dishes in his hands, a light was entering the window and kissing his face almost poetically, his green eyes shining bright… what were you thinking?! You forced yourself to simply take a plate and you started washing it, well aware of his eyes on you. “You’re just gonna stay there all day staring at me or you’ll actually help?” You asked him in a very serious voice, and he laughed, how dared that- “relax, we have plenty of time and if you didn’t notice I’m helping you” he said, clearly amused, you side glared at him “how, exactly?” He put down the pile of plates and took a step nearer “I carried here the dishes” he pointed out, you rolled your eyes, and turned your head once again to give him a warning glance to not make you anger, but you stopped the moment his face came into your vision. Why did he need to have such a pretty face, you wondered. You ended up doing all the dishes alone as he stood there, until finally he spoke “I like your eyes” he said, you turned, confused, he had that same playful light as always “you what?” You ask, looking at him, your face scrunched up in confusion “You heard me” he said smiling, as he got nearer “do you want to play 5 questions?” He asked, you turned fully, your back resting on the counter as you dried your hands, the dishes could have waited

“Wasn’t the game ‘20 question’?” He shook his head “It’s funnier this way, you have to choose the most important ones” He said, your shoulders were touching and, oh boy, you didn’t mind at all “Who starts?” You asked, he went straight to speaking up “what’s your favourite colour?” You laughed a bit at the irony of the question “what about the talk you made about three seconds ago about the fact that this way we had to do important questions?” You mocked him “you didn’t answer” he answered back, ignoring completely your statement “I like green” you shrugged “like my eyes?” He questioned “like your eyes” you confirmed “my turn… do you like someone?” You asked, sure that the answer would have been a positive one, even if strangely the thought made you jealous. “Yes, a certain child of y/g/p, who has a really smart mouth” he looked you in the eyes and you could swore he was looking into the depth of your soul. You stood there, processing the information with your mouth slightly agape. “Are you flirting with me?” You asked, in total disbelief, he took a step closer, placing his hand on your cheek, even if he was warm it made you shiver “took you long enough to understand it” and then he closed the gap between your lips, with the softest kiss someone has ever gave you…

A/n: Hope it reached your standards! Feel free to request anything else! 🧡🧡🧡

[meraki-sunset]

have you ever had any ideas for god tier outfit stylizing like what Meenah did in that one [S] page when she and Vriska were fighting in the dream bubbles?

Like, the idea of altering your god tier outfit in ways to make it look unique is cool and i haven't stopped thinking about it.

Oh you mean this scene?

Yeah it's cool that's something the players canonically can do, modifying your god outfit, having all diferent versions available to switch between them. It's a shame we only get to see it way way later on homestuck beyond canon with Rose and Dirk, but it makes candy John's outfit being too small even funnier, he probably doesn't even know he can change it.

I've though about giving alternate outfits to the kids, but i'm not sure, he originals are too iconic. They could change them after an important event on the epilogue or maybe when they're older, who knows.

here are some random sketches i made

[strip4kaneshiro]

Gabriel Reyes is such a good concept as a character and a love interest, so have more headcanons because I’ve had such a good day today 😛

Reaper who sneaks around Talon HQ in order to find you everyday. No matter if it makes him late to team meetings or not

If you aren’t dating by this point, he excuses it by saying “ Moira/Widow/Doomfist was looking for you earlier. Don’t get your ego boosted..”

Ik lots of other people already say this but it’s such a good concept, he definitely moved you out of harms way

Being put on a dangerous mission? Suddenly your name comes straight off the list and he goes instead. A certain lackey is talking about how you need to be “taught a lesson for sucking up to him” ? They get taught a lesson instead ❤️

Oh boy! A secret admirer!! I sure hope it isn’t your emotionally constipated supersoldier coworker who spends a lot of the company card at Walgreens !!

On a more serious note, getting into a relationship him makes his silly simp behavior that much funnier

He won’t tell you, but if you ever see him sitting down and doing some office work, he secretly yearns for you to sit in his lap (he wraps one of those big ass super soldier arms around you)

Gabriel, who after somewhat unwinding his vigilante persona, becomes the most protective, caring version of himself.

When the mask comes off, his need to touch you activates. Cannot keep his hands to himself

Obviously he isn’t as relaxed as he used to be, so expect some average Reaperesque grumbling if your too clingy (ironic, it’s okay if he’s clingy, but for you it’s a problem 😒)

Sitting at home on the couch with him includes his oddly hilarious commentary to your favorite reality shows

“ Pinche tú madre… she knows he’s no good for her. Why do you watch this stupid shit”

Later that evening, after a shower, you see that the rest of the season is finished on Netflix

Never forgets the small things you say. You liked a certain food at a resturaunt? He makes sure that resturaunt stays open (it becomes the “graveyard” where he sends people that are picking on you in the name of “spying on the enemy”)

You like iced coffee or bubble tea? He memorized your orders, even going as far as to keeping either a digital log or physical log, even both. (Sombra found the digital copy, it’s six pages in Microsoft word that goes into extensive detail of your preferences)

Speaking of food, he takes food allergies very serious.

He knows how it feels to be medically predisposed to issues, he never wants anyone to have their body malfunction if he can help it.

Beside his better judgement, he meets with Moira to see what can be done to get rid of food allergies. Then promptly leaves as she lists side effects.

If you aren’t interested in getting rid of them, he talks with the kitchen staff and tries limiting the amount depending on your allergy. Allergic to fish? No more grilled salmon. Allergic to shellfish? Shrimp Tacos immediately get discontinued. Lactose intolerant/Dairy Allergic? All of the dairy is to be replaced with alternatives immediately

I’ve been yapping too long, someone pls give me a fix idea

[yuuchama]

♠️🖋❤️

"This is bad." Deuce struggled to raise his head, instead slumping his shoulders and staring down at the notes in front of him. The writing started out neat and tidy but gradually became illegible, eventually fumbling off the page and marking the desk with ink.

Ace tried not to draw attention to the fit of giggles he had been overcome with. He kept looking away and clearing his throat now that the lecture had ended. Looking straight at Deuce without laughing was an impossible task.

"Dude..." he snickered. "That's a wild black eye you've got there."

"Shut it, Ace. If you knew I fell asleep during class, you should've woken me up."

Deuce sighed and buried his face in his hands, which only made things funnier. His palm smeared whatever eye makeup hadn't already been smudged, making him look beat up. His hands appeared to be covered in soot and a quarter of his face was a blurry mess of makeup instead of the usual elegant spade design.

It took a minute for Deuce to realize what happened. It was hard to tell if any got on his black uniform sleeves. He gazed at his dirty hands with despair. "Dang it. I don't have anything to fix this. The housewarden's gonna have my head."

Doubled over and clenching his stomach, Ace wiped a tear from his eye. At least one half of their combo remembered to seal his makeup that morning. "Don't sweat it! I have something that can help, don't worry."

It was a suspicious offer, but a sign of hope. Deuce would do anything if it meant avoiding Riddle's wrath. "Seriously? You carry black makeup? Uh, why?"

"Just in case! You should be thanking me instead of asking all these questions. What if I decide to change my mind, hmm?" Ace reached into his pencil case and started rooting around. He put on a great show of being serious. With one hand wrapped around something inside, he motioned for Deuce to come closer.

"Lean this way and close your eyes. There's not much time before Trein's next lecture."

Deuce grunted. Ace was right, and he didn't want to tarnish his future honor student reputation any further. The chair squeaked against the floor as he pushed it and swung his legs over the side. "I'll leave this to you, then. You can use the handkerchief in my bag."

"Great."

Ace hummed as he worked. Removing the blurry mess with Deuce's handkerchief came first, holding nothing back as he scrubbed his dorm mate's skin raw. Then it was time to reapply everything.

He gripped Deuce's chin, angling it upwards towards the light. "Hold still."

"Do you even know how to draw a spade?" Deuce asked.

"Hah? Who doesn't? What do you take me for?"

"It's just... you're taking a really long time to do this. Professor Trein's gonna come back soon."

"You really want to say that to the guy helping you out right now?"

Deuce got the point and remained silent. Applying his makeup usually didn't sting this much. He hoped he wouldn't get poked in the eye or have something inappropriate drawn in the end. Ace wouldn't go that far, right?

After a few blows to dry his face with Ace's gross breath, Deuce could finally relax. Ace proclaimed, "There. All done!"

"You really drew a spade, right?"

"Quit suspecting me! 'Course I did!" Ace turned to the student behind them. "Hey, what's this thing on Deuce's face look like?"

The student, caught off guard, glanced up from their phone. "Huh? The spade?"

"Yes, exactly. Thank you."

Deuce wished he had his handkerchief back to wipe the smug grin off Ace's face. "Alright, thanks. I really appreciate it, you've saved me."

"No problem, anytime. I'll even do your makeup tomorrow if you want." Ace began tidying up his desk space, straightening his notebook and putting his tools back, while Deuce returned his chair to its original position.

Deuce froze mid-chair scoot and narrowed his eyes. "What is that."

Ace pretended not to hear him. Deuce rose a shaky finger to his eye, gently tapping the sore skin.

He lowered his voice to a threat. "Dude. I swear to the Seven, if you just drew on my face with permanent marker..."

There was no time for Ace to enjoy the mischief, he had to stifle his laughter into his shirt as Trein finally returned and the students went quiet. He walked to the front podium and put his books down. A "pfft" snuck out the instant Deuce whacked Ace's chair with his foot.

A peeved off Deuce clenched his pen and mouthed, "this isn't over."

[another-goblin]

One of Dr. Ratio's PhDs is in Natural Theology, where he published the work "Aeons: A Natural Phenomenon" and got hailed as the "most sacred prophet of Aeon non-theism" (basically, the way I understand it, "Aeons exist, but they are not special, they are not gods")

So it's not just "Stop worshipping geniuses yall", it's "Stop worshipping Aeons" too. Which is quite ballsy.

Then I did a little research about the meaning of "non-theism", and it can mean different things, but look at this quote I found on the "non-theism" Wiki page (by Pema Chödrön, a Buddhist nun):

Theism is a deep-seated conviction that there's some hand to hold […] Non-theism is relaxing with the ambiguity and uncertainty of the present moment without reaching for anything to protect ourselves […] Nontheism is finally realizing there is no babysitter you can count on.

Does this remind you of something?

Dr. Ratio: ...but even a life marked by failure is a life worth living — it is only in moments of solitude and despair, when help is absent, that fools grasp how to pick themselves up.

Basically the same idea: don't rely on these higher beings who don't care about you; you'll do better if you realize that you are on your own. 

BTW, the aeons who get personally involved in human affairs tend to do more harm than good, so whether they are actually worth worshipping is a good question for another time.

But returning to the 'Aeon non-theist' thing. What is funnier, him writing this paper after not being accepted into GS (totally not being bitter about failing to get the attention of a certain someone, nope) or before (I wouldn't be surprised by Nous' reaction. "Oh wow. F you too, dude. No Genious Society for you")

On a slightly unrelated note, what "being recognized by Nous" entails anyway? It's not about being an emanator or belonging to the path of Erudition, it's used as a euphymism for "being invited to Geniuos Society." Is Nous involved in it at all? Do they decide whom to invite? Do they send a magical letter to the chosen ones? Imagine Nous considering Ratio but immediately noping out because he's clearly Lan's guy.

But what if Nous isn't involved? What if there's a boring commission that decides whom to invite to GS and then proclaims it as "someone has attracted the gaze of Nous". So again, imagine them considering Ratio, ever-hyperactive, getting 8 PhDs, making discoveries left and right, and teaching dozens of courses. Now imagine him finally being invited to GS: getting a GIANT confidence boost and having access to the Guild resources, starting, like, 10 Simulated Universe-sized projects at the same time. GS just wouldn't be able to handle it.

PS: I'm aware of (and agree with) the prevailing theory that he wasn't invited because he wasn't just seeking knowledge for the sake of knowledge, something something. So don't take the last part too seriously, I'm just being silly.

[firenati0n]

"who was that?" - a crack-ridden 500 word ficlet for @jafffacakess and a silly little addition to my unhinged Sims fic where Henry discovers something...wicked on Alex's laptop. reading that before this will make this infinitely funnier i swear. paging @indestructibleheart bc this universe is your fault fr (thank you ily) and @softboynick for the inspo! thank you all! and especially thanks to @anchoredarchangel for fact-checking my mpreg, which i steadfastly ignored. :) ilyyy

warning: SIMS-RELATED MPREG!! because wickedwhims is a menace of a mod!!! just like. a sentence or two. nothing graphic. but it is There. sorry for the mpreg debut. it won't happen again i swear!!!!

Alex’s computer is noisier than ever, and it’s driving Henry up the bloody wall. 

“What deranged scenario have you cooked up in your game now?” Henry asks, fearing the answer but knowing the outcome. “It’s only ever this loud when they’re either having gravitationally impossible sex on an appliance, or you’re testing the limits of our furniture. Our Sims neighbors must despise us.”

Alex’s resulting expression is a bad omen. “I’m…messing with some controls in the mod.”

The minute Alex leaves to use the toilet, Henry rushes to Alex’s laptop, still open and whirring. He is not prepared for what he finds.

Sim Henry and Alex are cuddling on the couch and watching a movie, the fireplace crackling. A serene evening in, all things considered. 

Sim Henry is also, by Henry’s estimate, seven months pregnant. 

Henry hears a flush and quickly goes back to his seat; he absolutely cannot wait to hear how Alex talks himself out of this one. 

Alex settles back in, a bright smile on his face. Henry is, against all odds, in deep and embarrassing love with this man.  

“How’s our baby doing?” Henry asks. 

Alex beams. “Artie’s great, he’s a toddler now, getting along so well with David and the horse.” After Henry bought Alex the pet expansion pack, all bets were off. Suddenly, Alex wanted the Horse Ranch and Aliens too. How their Sims had horses in their brownstone backyard in the city...outside the bounds of human logic, but perfectly acceptable in the game.

“No, I meant our other baby,” Henry says, working overtime to keep his face neutral. 

Alex freezes. “What baby?”

“The baby I’m carrying. Who was that, hm?”

“That’s scientifically impossible and you know it.”

“Alex, Artie is literally a science baby. My sim, however, is currently in the third trimester.” None of these words are in the English language.

Alex squints at the screen. “Damn, whose pregnant husband is that?”

“Alex.”

Alex laughs, cracking under Henry’s stare. “Listen, I’m not sorry. One day you had morning sickness and the game told me you were pregnant, which I didn’t even know was fucking possible. If I had to guess, it was the upside down fridge sixty-nine, I run that shit constantly. What should we name her, you got any suggestions?”

“You’re telling me oral got me pregnant?”

“Are you seriously nitpicking the realism of male pregnancy to my face?” Alex barrels on. “How about Cat, as a nod to both your mother and my sister? That could be cute. Art and Cat!”

“Art and Cat,” Henry echoes. “Yes, I quite like that.”

“Perfect, Cat it is,” Alex says with a grin. 

“To recap,” Henry starts. “We have a toddler, a puppy, a newborn on the way, and a horse—”

“I don’t want to hear a single fucking word about Nutter Butter,” Alex interjects. “He completes our family.”

“Of course,” Henry says seriously. “Wouldn’t dream of it.” He looks at Alex curiously. “How close am I to—”

“Labor? About thirteen minutes away.”

Henry pulls his chair around next to Alex. “Perfect.”