#the movies already improved on the books. like what else can you do. make one that sticks closer to the books and suck as a result?

[deanpinterester]

GIRL WHAT

[ghost-proofbaby]

kissing lessons

summary: you and robin have already shared several firsts as best friends: your first time holding hands, your first time cuddling someone, your first time flirting. so what's a little platonic kissing?

pairing: robin buckley x fem!reader

warnings: lots of sapphic pining, yearning, etc. assumed unrequited love. hopeless crushing. doing romantic things and claiming they're totally platonic when they very much are not. mentions of reading trying to conform to the 80s standards by dating a boy. reader is explicitly female (which should be given since robin is canonically a lesbian)

wc: 3.4k+

a/n: this one was a long time coming. it's based off of my own first kiss, loosely.

part 2

Being best friends with Robin Buckley has always been about growing – together.

Life has a plethora of lessons for young souls to learn in time, and some of those lessons were simply hard. The first time you picked up a musical instrument and attempted to play your very first note, and it sounded atrocious. Nothing like the movies, more difficult than you could have ever imagined. The first time you walked the halls of your high school, and the terrifying first wave of panic at the realization you’d need to learn the map of the lands in order to navigate that maze for the next four years. The first time you walked into a classroom all of two minutes late, and the first shatter of embarrassment in your chest as every eye in the room turned to you. The first time you trip over your own laces on your way to Chemistry, the first time you impulsively cut your hair with the kitchen scissors, the first time a boy asked you out as a joke, and the first time someone asked you out genuinely only to fumble over every single word. Your first school dance, your first time cooking pasta from scratch, your first time attending a concert without a chaperone. 

Firsts, firsts, firsts. Life is simply full of them, and they never get any easier or kinder, but having a best friend at your side certainly makes it all bearable. 

Robin Buckley was that rock for you. And you, for her. 

It’s sort of how you got into this mess to begin with. 

“It’s going to be weird, isn’t it?” 

“It’s not going to be weird unless we make it weird, Robin.”

“How can I not make it weird? Where would my lips even go?”

You’re both lucky that no one is home to hear all the shrieking currently occurring in your small bedroom. Only the posters on your wall and your teddy bear you’ve had since you were five are witnesses to the current predicament occuring. 

Robin had been the one to suggest it, in all fairness. Graduation was next week, and there had been a lot of reminiscing flying about. All the firsts, all the hopeful lasts, and all the fatal moments you needed to drag by the hair to the backyard and bury six feet under. 

The topic of conversation had veered pretty erratically, turning left towards that one stubborn B left on Robin’s postcard as a result of her refusing to attend her assigned tutoring for Geometry last year, and then sliding right as you’d huffed about that one girl who had been an absolute menace towards you sophomore year when you’d botched your improv solo at a band concert. But in the last five minutes, it had finally straightened out – it had finally begun to follow the trail of a line of remembering that no one else would ever be allowed to know outside of you and Robin. 

You’d brought up the first date you’d ever gone on. A ridiculous milkshake outing with some guy in your freshman English class that had left you feeling more confused than starry eyed or lovesick as the books promised. 

The date that had caused Robin Buckley to offer to hold your hand at random, in private moments, the week leading up to it. Just so you’d know how it felt. Just so you could figure out how to best intertwine your fingers with someone else’s without feeling terrible foreign about it all. 

It had been platonic. You both swore it had been, shrugging carelessly as you’d let your palm meet your best friends. 

And you’d felt more every time your skin brushed hers than you had the entire night with that boy. Spent the entire date wishing it was Robin’s knuckles bumping yours when you’d reached for that damn strawberry milkshake. 

“Against mine, I’d hope.” 

The dissection hadn’t ended at the hand-holding. Next, the two of you had wistfully recalled the sleepover in which you’d first decided to learn how to spoon one another. Robin had read about it in a magazine, you’d never had firsthand experience, and it just felt right to suggest. Robin had rambled for a good five minutes before you’d tugged her back into her bed and commanded her to just lay there as you figured out where you arm should go as your body curved along the back of hers. 

It had been nice. Really nice. 

You’d never gone out on another date after the Great Milkshake Catastrophe, as the two of you had called it. Robin claimed none of the boys at school could handle her eccentricism. Both of you, young girls fumbling about the world, starving for touch completely unaware. You told yourselves everyone cuddled with their friends. You told yourselves it was normal. 

But then, you’d switched positions, Robin being the big spoon as the teen magazine had described, and you swore your heart had burst when her arm wrapped around your waist and her fingers slotted between your own against your abdomen. 

You’d fallen asleep in that position. Awoken to Robin’s face pressed right into your chest as you’d spread out on your back. Ignored the flaky drool stain left behind on your skin when she’d finally joined the living once more. Pretended like you both hadn’t had the best rest of your lives as you’d clung to one another through fading dreams and subtle snores. 

It was normal, right? It had to be, because it was nice, and it had become a part of your normal sleepover rituals. 

Friends used each other’s boobs as pillows all the time, as Robin had defended. 

“Yeah, but, well-” Robin cuts off in her current stricken rambling, throwing her hands out around the air between you two, “What about when it’s more than just pecking? You know? All that gross shit, where tongues get involved and spit is exchanged and, oh God, should we be sucking on some mints right now or something? Oh my God, what if you’re allergic to my chapstic-”

Gross shit. 

The not-so-clever code word the two of you used whenever describing any sort of romantic interactions. Kissing, making out, sex. The things all of your peers were regular experiencing, sometimes even displaying in public, that the two of you only turned your noses up to. 

You didn’t want to suck the face off of Connor in your fifth period pottery class. The only person you could imagine on the receiving end of that that didn’t make your stomach turn was sitting right in front of you now, eyes wide and cheeks flushed as she clearly panicked. 

“I’m not allergic to passion fruit Lip Smackers, Robs.”

The switch to a passion fruit flavor was new. Robin had been using the strawberry flavor religiously prior, but had recently offered it to you with the excuse of your obsession with strawberry flavored things. 

And now, you’d been using it daily. Trying not to think about how many times her lips had been on it prior to yours. Trying not to think about how many ways you could twist it into some sick secondary kissing metaphor, to have your lips slick with the same sticky substance as hers had been so many times before.

Tried not to think about what Robin Buckley’s lips tasted like, period. Easier said than done when the thought crosses your mind every time you lick your lips moment after application, getting the faux sweetness all over your tongue. 

“You could be. And how would we even know? I can’t even drive! If you start to have an allergic reaction, I can’t even take you to the hospital! We don’t have a c-” 

You can’t do it anymore – any other day, you relish in the sound of Robin’s voice as she’ll squeal on and on about everything and anything. But not today. 

You cut her off with a kiss.

The very same kiss you’d both timidly agreed upon when you’d both realized graduation was next week, and neither of you had had your first kiss. 

The same deal as the cuddling. The same deal as the hand-holding. The same deal as all the pick-up lines and flirting you’d try out on each other, the same deal as all the sweet ‘love notes’ you’d write for one another and slip into backpacks and binders alike. 

The same deal as that fluttering in your chest every time she looked up at you at the local pool, eager to see if you’d witnessed her flip beneath the water. The same deal as all the nights you’d cried into your pillow after being pestered about if any boys at school caught your eyes, because you knew they hadn’t and they never would. Your eyes were already too busy, completely captured by the sight of the brunette now pressing her lips against yours. 

None of the boys at school could ever compare. 

Passion fruit and strawberry mingles within the short peck, freckled cheeks and nose smashing against yours in the most awkward fashion possible. It could be weird; it should be weird. 

It’s not. 

When you pull away, Robin is completely stunned into silence for quite possibly the first time in her life. And her lips are shining with some of your residual spit, and her cheeks are the perfect shade of rose that no actual flower could capture.

Mother Nature herself could never replicate the girl in front of you. The girl you’d been best friends with for six years now, the girl you’d pined relentlessly for for just as long. 

Only you’d just recently realized it. Somewhere between the lip smackers exchange and the movie night in which you’d intertwined your legs on the couch and felt the weight of her between your hips as she’d passed out. 

Looking at her now sort of feels like realizing it all over again. Sort of like looking out over a precipice, and taking a deep breath, because you know you’re leaping off the cliff. No scared looks over your shoulder, no hesitation as you throw your foot out into mid-air. 

The kind of rush you’ve never felt with a boy, and never will. 

“Was that…” she whispers, voice hoarse before she clears it, batting her gorgeous lashes and taking the shakiest of breaths, “Was that good?”

“I dunno,” you lie, “I think we should try again.” 

It’s like a dance, you soon realize. Following her steps, guiding her with your own. She slides her way up closer, and you press your back against your headboard. Her hands are shaking when they brush your outer thighs, and your blood is racing as you tug on her elbows to guide her to straddle your lap. 

You both had said, after all, you needed to learn to be better kissers. That you couldn’t leave high school without having shoved your tongue down someone’s throat at least once. Your words, not hers. 

Your desperate attempt to make sure that someone was Robin Buckley. Your pitiful attempt to have the one thing you don’t think you’ll ever be allowed to hold. 

The weight of her on your lap is nice. The feeling of her lips returning to yours is nice. The way neither of your hands know where to go as you let your lips linger together a few seconds longer than the first time is nice. 

It’s far nicer than Connor from English could ever make you feel. It’s far nicer than that poor boy at the diner ever was, though he tried his best. 

You’re the brave one, when it’s all said and done. You’re the first one to let your palms settle at her hips, squeezing ever so gently to feel the softness beneath slot perfectly into your hold. You’re the first one to timidly include tongue, parting both your lips, trying to ignore the shivers running up your spine as all you can taste now is passion fruit lip smackers. 

Even with your own lip balm, you know your lips are horribly chapped. Dreadfully thirsty and desperate to absorb all the love you know isn’t yours to claim at this moment. Chapped lips, quivering hands, shaking breaths. Unsure movements and the ringing question in the back of your head of am I doing this right? 

Is she feeling what I’m feeling? 

Maybe she is, maybe she isn’t. But she’s kissing you back. Her tongue is meeting yours in movements that are nothing like the movies, shy baps that you both will probably laugh about later. Kitten licks to test the waters. 

And then there’s the retreating. The rock of her body as she settles her weight closer to your knees, and her tongue is put away in favor of just letting her lips slot between yours in slow and lazy movements. You can feel every deep breath she takes through her nose between the kisses, you can smell her perfume seeping into your psyche every moment she spends so close to you. 

The only lesson being learned right now is that you were an idiot. You were an absolute fool, and you are absolutely in love with your best friend.

“Better?” she questions when she pulls away entirely, and you try not to whimper. Try not to show her how badly you want this, need this. 

You hate the silence and you nearly wish she’d start babbling again. You wish she’d give you a reason to kiss her and shut her up, if for nothing more than to taste passion fruit and yearning all over again. 

You’re quiet for a few beats, staring at her as your chest heaves and your heart begins to twist up into terrible shapes. “I… Yeah. Yeah. I think we’re getting the hang of it, don’t you?” 

“Oh, absolutely,” her nervous smile breaks, and you wish she wouldn’t continue the thought, but she does, “You’re gonna be a pro in no time, breaking boys hearts left and right when you kiss them like that.” 

You don’t want to break a boy’s heart. You want to break hers – you want to entirely implode her heart the way she has yours, and have the honor to know it was mutual. A mutual destruction you both dove into headfirst. You only want to kiss Robin like this, forever. You only ever want to know how right her hand feels in yours, not some guy who can’t even choke out the right words to invite you to the cinema. 

You want, and you want, and you want. 

And just as you bite your tongue, decide against pouring out all your affections all over your bed sheets and pulling her right back into you again, desperate to share air with her and only her, you can hear your front door slamming over. 

Robin has never moved so quickly in her life. Jumping off your lap, leaping to the edge of the bed as a feverish blush overtakes her entire body. As though she might be embarrassed, as though she might be regretful. 

You still haven’t moved from your position, back sticky with sweat against the headboard, when your parents walk past your open door and say hello. 

They probably don’t even hear your sad and quiet excuse of a returned greeting, too enraptured by Robin’s own excited quip of saying hi. 

Your parents love her. Adore her in a way parents should care for their child’s closest confidant. They treat her like their own daughter, and Robin’s parents do the same for you. Once a month, your mothers meet up for mimosas over brunch and probably giggle about how lucky their girls are to have one another. 

You get it. You love her too. But certainly not in the way you should love your best friend. 

They finally leave, and Robin is quick to turn to you, eyes shining with all the stars and sunshine the Universe could have to offer, “That… um, thank you.”

“For what?” you laugh breathlessly, finally shifting forward, looking down at your thighs that had served as a temporary home to the girl who holds your heart, trying to swallow down any shame and all that rapid longing. 

“For… you know,” she smiles, a secret for the two of you to only ever keep, never sharing with the world. Selfishly, you almost enjoy the sentiment, “I’m sorry I was acting so weird about it before. You were right, it didn’t have to be weird unless we made it weird. I’m lucky to have you as my best friend, you know? And like I said, if you’re…. You know, doing that with boys, you’re going to be a certified heartbreaker. The world isn’t ready for my best friend. Besides! Another thing checked off the list, right?” she pauses, and you swear the smile has gone sad, but you can’t risk the projection, “Now we can both say we’ve done… that… before graduation! And-”

You speak before you can think better of it, interrupting her entirely, “I think I need more practice.” 

She stops in her tracks, eyebrows raising wildly and eyes turning to saucers, “What?”

“I think…” your head reels, desperate to come up with an excuse to kiss her again. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but eventually. “I think I need more lessons, yeah? Like, I don’t know. More practice,” Oxygen evades you in desperation, giving your best puppy dog eyes, system in overdrive as you stare at her lips and your voice drops to a careful whisper, “My parents are out of town next weekend… Maybe we could try again then? Same time?” 

You swear her smile shifts, and you hadn’t even noticed the ingenuity in it previously until she dazzles you with one that must be real. As if you’ve just made her year, lightened her load, offered over your first born to the darling girl. 

“Well….” she moves her eyes across the room, focusing on a polaroid photo of the two of you pinned to the wall above the desk, “I mean, we did say lessons, plural. I can see if Steve will cover my shift on Saturday night if that works?” 

Am I doing this right? 

“That definitely works.”

Is she feeling what I’m feeling?

“Perfect. It’s a…. date, then.” 

“It’s a date.” 

It’s not. Only to you, never to her. 

But it’ll be enough. It’s enough to know next Saturday, she’ll be back here, in your bed and in your lap, getting that passion fruit chapstick all over your lips and shaking your chest from the inside out until it’s ready to burst. 

One day, you might be the brave one, when it’s all said and done. You’ll tell your best friend all the ways she feels so nice, and all the ways you want to capture that niceness in a bottle for the rest of your days. You’ll tell her the way you have no interest in the boys at school and how you’re cursed to forever be the heartbroken, never the heartbreaker, and only ever at her hand. The very same one clasping yours as she stands at your front door, thanking you vaguely once more, grinning ear to ear as she gives you three tight squeezes that are completely lost on you. 

Today’s not the day, though. Today is the day where you spend the night in your self-made cage, face buried in the pillow, noises somewhere between desperately muffled screams of frustration and dry sobs of torture leaving your lips as you picture the way she’d looked after the kiss. Her eyes softly shut, her lips still puckered, her neck entirely exposed as she tilts her chin back to look at your ceiling through her eyelids. Picturing the way that next time, you’ll try to convince her the two of you should learn the art of neck kisses. Picturing the way that next time, maybe you’ll grab her hips a little harder or let your hands wander a bit farther to her thighs. 

Tonight is the night you have no idea amongst your pity party, that Robin Buckley is on the other side of town, experiencing the exact same turmoil as she longs for the girl who tastes like her gifted strawberry lip smackers – the very same one Steve Harrington berated on her to get rid of when she’d vomited out all the ways she hates fake strawberry flavoring, but you love it, and she’d convinced herself if she bathed herself in enough of it, you might just want her the way she wants you. 

Tonight’s not the night, though. 

One day, the kissing lessons will simply be kisses. One day.

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[ms-demeanor]

This is regarding your post involving making friends. I have had a spectacular amount of failures in meetup groups, particularly involving men from multiple meetup groups trying to take advantage of me or using me. In addition to that, the other members of the groups tend are often quite rude. Also, many meetups in my area tend to fall into one of the following categories: professional seminar, mommy & me, or the other members are double my age or older. What would you advise?

Volunteering - find something you care about and see if there is a local volunteer opportunity; you might want to look into food banks or mutual aid projects.

Crafting - this will likely be an older crew, but making friends with older people is cool honestly.

Sports - see if there's a kickball league or some other variety of low-key sport that you can sign up for.

Get super into the local music scene. Go to bar shows, go to basement shows, go to backyard shows. If you go to places where they have local music and hang out a bunch you will get to know local music people eventually, which includes both people in bands and people interested in bands.

Become a regular at your local library. Go once a week at the same time of day and you'll start to get to know people.

Become a regular at something else local. If you go to the same coffee shop three times a week for a few months and are polite to the employees you will probably eventually have friends among the people there; even if you do this by walking around the neighborhood park at the same time of day you will start getting to know the park regulars people love habits and if you can become a chill part of their daily scenery they will eventually want to investigate further.

Start your own club of some kind. Maybe start a book club for a particular genre of book that you like, or start a movie group where you meet up to see a movie together twice a month. You can post things like this on meetup websites or facebook, but you can also make fliers to put up in places that you think people you might find interesting would hang out.

Join a gym and go regularly. Sometimes a random person you see all the time in a gym can go from being a reliable on-the-spot spotter to a good friend.

Take a class locally. See if your town has a community center that offers cooking classes or computer classes or any kind of classes even things you already know. I keep making jokes about improv but improv people are great; see if you can take an impov class. See if your local music store offers music classes (I made weirdly good friends with the folks at the music store where I took vocal lessons; this was a pleasant surprise!)

When you try any of these places make friendly smalltalk with the people you encounter and express interest in them. If you are speaking to employees, make sure you're giving them lots of conversational outs because attempting to befriend people who are working can feel like you're cornering them, I'd actually say don't try to befriend the employees at a business unless you go there and they attempt to befriend you, however as someone who worked in coffee shops for ten years if someone randomly started showing up for six hours a week I would almost certainly have gotten to a friendly shoot-the-shit level with them within a month; if you go out among people who are sociable and are around them enough sometimes the sociable people go "aha! new friend sighted!" and do the hard work for you, but you do have to go to places to let yourself be found by the sociable ones.)

I do not, generally speaking, use meetup groups as a generic thing as much as I look into what groups exist locally that I am interested in. If a local game store is running a weekly Magic tournament, that's a better place to meet people in my opinion than a one-time bowling event.

[anim-ttrpgs]

Reading the book, and I'm already loving it. I agree with a lot of the things y'all say in it (players control the characters, not the narrator, etc.), but I was surprised at the strong insistence on 3rd person play.

Personally I like 1st person play because it helps me with immersion. If I play in 3rd person then my mental camera goes 3rd person, which feels more like playing a video game and removes that thrill of embodying someone else and living in a new world.

Usually I see people either take a strong pro 1st person stance, or a noncommittal stance, but this is the first time I've come across a game that insists on the 3rd person. I'm curious about the reasoning behind it. Was it just a philosophical decision, or did it bear out in playtesting that 3rd person was the better method? In the book y'all acknowledge that 3rd person play doesn't eliminate the threat of griefing from bad faith players.

Y'all clearly put a lot of thought into the game, so that really interested me. Could be a good learning opportunity!

I passed this on to one of our team and this is what she had to say:

In addition to our own home table just preferring to play in 3rd person, we believe that perspective is an important element of TTRPGs that doesn't get explored very often in the modern landscape. The games we play are composed of language - not just the words on the page, but the words we say at the table. Changing the verbiage will create a different emotional space, and a different experience. That zoomed out mental camera you describe is part of the point! In any TTRPG, players are always two things: participant, and audience. The narration we employ at the table affects the game world, yes, but we are also the only people there to see it play out. Eureka strongly emphasizes the "audience" side of that equation, and wants to frame the "participant" side as an act of authorship and discovery rather than one of inhabiting the world.

Just on a fundamental level, perspective is a defining part of any media - the camera angle in a movie or video game, the person of a book's prose, who tells the story, and who they tell it for. The way we frame a story changes the response it evokes. As you say, you've seen either strong pro-1st-person stances or neutral ones, but not a strong pro-3rd-person stance. I don't think that's because 1st person is inherently better for this sort of game, I think its because there is a tendency in the hobby right now - for a variety of reasons - to treat TTRPGs like a form of improv theater. That's not a problem in isolation per se, but I think it's one that limits what the medium can be or do. TTRPGs can be improv theater, but is that all they can be?

On a final note, we have also seen the insistence on 1st-person play and the approach of "embodying" a character occasionally cause real harm when the people involved have trouble separating player and character. That's also part of the reason we're so insistent about these being two separate people, because investigators tend to do some pretty messed up things (this being a horror focused game, after all), and we don't want people equivocating their friends with the characters they play when that level of emotional intensity is involved. Many people who play in 1st person are able to engage with that in a healthy way and understand the difference, of course, but I think it's hard to deny that the language makes that equivocation easier.

- @ashweather (person from out team who doesn't normally run this blog)

Adding on myself, another thing that I always like to bring up in this discussion is that first-person verbiage did not used to be so universal! Playing in the hobby even 4 or 5 years ago, you'd see (or at least I would see) a mix of third and first person verbiage at tables, and even people who used both interchangably. It's only in the past few years that third-person verbiage for TTRPGs has gone practically extinct, and i think most of the blame lies at the feet of big-budget "actual play" shows like Critical Role being many people's only reference for how a TTRPG can be played. Critical Role uses first-person, so therefor that's how TTRPGs are played.

I've even had people tell me on multiple separate occassions "that's wrong" when I'm trying to use third-person verbiage for TTRPGs, when playing with rulebooks which explicitly say in their text early on "you can use 1st or 3rd person to describe your character's actions"! (most, if not all, D&D edition rulebooks say this!)

In closing, yeah, if Eureka were a video game, it would be in third-person. Eureka doesn't want you in its world, it wants a character.

[majorbaby]

it takes a conscious effort to break your patterns of consumption and unlearn the notion beauty, interiority, diverse ways of existence aren't exclusive to whiteness or maleness. part of that isn't your fault. certain music is played on the radio, certain shows survive cancellation no matter what, certain people seem to be able to commit the worst possible acts against other human beings and are excused on account of their creative genius. others are selectively punished, with good reason sure, but still, selectively.

now more than ever it's easier to immerse yourself in art made by people outside of the mainstream. reading lists, free resources, playlists... all this stuff is more accessible than ever, but you've got to make an effort to give it a try. it's black history month, the recs are pouring in, go have a look. or take a chance on something absolutely no one has recommended anywhere and if you find something you like, rec it to someone else because the likelihood is they haven't heard of it.

tracy chapman's "fast car" is one of eleven songs that appears on her self-titled debut album. can you name the second hit single from it? if you're american and you fell anywhere left of center as of the 2016 election, it should be on the tip of your tongue if you were engaged in your country's politics at the time, regardless of your level of actual investment in the system. if not, the next time you're doing a task you need both hands with, washing the dishes, having dinner, doing your makeup, put that album on.

there's a post with over 100K notes on here that i see all the time of bruce springsteen and clarence clemons kissing. there's a part of that that is immediately meaningful to many if you're lgbtq, and a part that is harder for non-black lgbtq people to feel the weight of. but it is worth trying to do and was part of the reason why they kissed so often in the first place. clarence clemons was from norfolk, virginia. he released multiple albums outside of his work with the e street band. they may not be for you, but give them a try.

give enough music, or movies, or books that aren't a part of the approved canon a try, and there's no way you won't find something you don't feel as passionate about as you do about springsteen, siken, the beatles, what have you.

james baldwin was a prolific artist. see if you can't find something of his you like more than giovanni's room.

immerse yourself in ringo sheena, who mitski cites as one of her influences.

if you have difficulty paying attention to music you don't recognize, (i get it) make a playlist that alternates tracks you know and love with brand new tracks. start small. 5 faves of all time, 5 you're going to try out. you won't like everything, but you might find yourself looking forward to 6 songs instead of 5 eventually.

for movies, pick an actor whose performance you loved in something and explore their work. last year i picked whoopi goldberg, also a prolific artist, with a vast body of work that's pretty accessible as a result of her constant, intentional effort.

if you're an artist yourself, you can only stand to improve by getting to know your fellow artists better. so expand your notion of what art is. you can do it for free in lots of cases, and you're spending that time listening to music or reading or watching movies or series anyway, what have you got to lose?

anti-racism sometimes means engaging in real-world narratives of pain endured by brown and black people. that pain permeates much of our art, but we're just as three-dimensional as everybody else, and every aspect of our experiences come through in our work. you know that already, because what else is happening when you indulge in various genres. for everything you love or enjoy, there's a brown or black person who's doing something along those lines, in many cases, those genres wouldn't exist in their current form without the influence of our communities, some more than others, depending on where you're from. you can actually keep one foot inside your comfort zone and dip your toe into something else. that choice is both a joy and a luxury.

[sink-me-in-your-ocean]

𝔊𝔥𝔬𝔲𝔩𝔦𝔰𝔥 ℌ𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔠𝔞𝔫𝔬𝔫𝔰 IV

It's time to kick off spooky season!

What is it like watching scary movies with the ghouls? And what movies are you watching with them?

Mentions of gore/slight spoilers for the movies mentioned.

Swiss:

Loves jumpscares 

Loves scaring you (or anyone else that’s watching) too

No matter what you watch he will always want something scarier

But he also loves comedy

You watched “It” with him and he won’t stop quoting the movie

“You’ll float too!” He cackles maniacally and wiggles his fingers as he chases you around the dark loft.

“Swiss, stop!” You aren’t really scared, but you jump up on the couch anyway, grabbing a pillow to hold out as a shield.

“Beep beep Richie!” He grins as wide as possible, bugging his eyes out at you, and lunges.

You swing the pillow like you’re a heroine slaying a dragon in a fantasy book. He dodges and jumps on you, pinning you under him.

“You’re an animal!” You scream as he tickles you, making you squirm beneath him.

At least it’s an improvement from him running after you repeating, “Here’s Johnny!”

-

Phantom:

Only wants to watch vampire movies

You offered him a plethora of choices, ranging from silly ones like “Once Bitten” to more serious action movies like “Underworld”

He got overwhelmed and ended up closing his eyes and picking one at random

“The Invitation” wasn’t your first choice, but what Phantom wants, Phantom gets

“Okay she is definitely a vampire.” He stared at the pale, tall woman on screen.

“How can you tell? You can barely see out of that fortress you’ve built yourself.” You teased lightly, offering him a handful of popcorn.

He accepted it, huffing, “I have to be prepared.”

“For what?” You stifled a laugh.

“The jumpscares, duh.” 

You rolled your eyes, nodding along. The movie continued and eventually a spicy scene between the two main characters happened, making you both turn red.

“Well I was not prepared for that.” He said sheepishly.

Towards the end, it got a little too scary for him, and he ended up throwing the bowl of popcorn on the floor.

You held him close, protecting him from the sexy and not-so-scary vampires.

-

Dewdrop/Sodo:

Gets super into it

Loves any and all horror movies

The bloodier the better - blood and guts are hilarious to him

The Saw films are his comfort movies, he has definitely watched YouTube videos on how to escape all the traps

You put on a classic slasher for him once you learned he had never watched A Nightmare on Elm Street

“Oh come on! Just pop through the ceiling already and grab her!”

“Dew, stop! This is supposed to be building tension. They do that to get the audience on the edge of their seat… although it looks like you’re off yours.” You realize he’s sitting on the floor directly in front of the screen.

A few minutes later.

“That blood doesn’t look very real.” He scoffed.

“Do you think they use real blood?”

He made a face. “How else would they slice everybody like that?”

You spend the next two hours explaining to him that movies are not, in fact, real. His mind is blown to say the least.

By the time you resume watching the movie, he forgets most of what you told him, resuming shouting at the screen for Freddy Krueger to kill the teenagers.

-

Rain:

This ghoul does NOT watch scary movies 

Why? He gets bored easily

Also, he ruins the movie by calling out all of the jumpscares

(He still gets scared though, he is just deflecting)

Hypercritical as heck

You still beg him to watch Cabin in the Woods with you

“Why do they run so stupidly?!”

You reach over and grab his leg, “Rain, we are supposed to be enjoying the movie, not yelling at the characters every two seconds.”

“I can’t help it, there’s no one to root for.” He whines, “They did it to themselves wandering into that creepy basement and playing with the weird stuff down there.”

You raised your eyebrow in an “oh really?” look.

“Plus, they shouldn’t be in this cabin in the middle of the woods anyway!” He gestures for emphasis. “Who does that?”

You hold up the remote, “Okay Rain, I can turn it off if you want.”

“No, no, it’s fine, might as well finish it.” He immediately backpedals.

“Good.” You settled back in, at least hoping he would enjoy the plot twist coming up.

Spoiler alert: He didn’t.

He waved his arms at the screen, “What in the hell is the lady from Alien doing here?!”

Maybe next time you’ll think twice about watching a scary movie with this ghoul.

-

Mountain:

Likes Halloween-themed movies with humor

Will indulge in a “real” horror movie from time to time, but usually at the behest of others

He will comfort you if you get too scared

So you insist on an actual scary movie

What could possibly go wrong?

“Oh hells no!” You clapped your hands over your eyes, the scene with the reverse bear trap simply proving to be too much for you.

“Come on, it’s okay - she actually escapes it!” He watched the movie Saw already, vetting it so he could make sure it would be okay for you to watch since he knows you’re a scaredy-cat. 

He was a little too lenient with this one though, overconfident in your limited bravery.

“Practical effects like that really scare me, Mountain, you could have given me a warning!”

“Please, those intestines she found the key in don’t look real at all.” He was amused, then turned and opened his arms, “Get over here, I’ll protect you.”

“Good.” You scooted closer, putting the blanket over you both.

Once your heartbeat went back to a normal cadence, your eyelids started to droop.

The rest of the movie was fine, not that you noticed, you were too busy doing… other things. Spoiler alert: you passed out, comfortably snuggled up nice and warm.

-

Cirrus:

Prefers artsy horror movies over slashers

She is not so much picky, but she is very opinionated

Cirrus will not hesitate to tell you when a movie is bad, often pausing a film to interject her thoughts at multiple points

(But we love her for it)

She left it up to you to choose between two of her favorite modern horror movies: Hereditary and Us

You mistakenly chose the former

“I’m going to be sick.” 

The car scene just played, and now you can never look at Alex Wolff of The Naked Brothers Band the same.

“Please, just wait, I promise it’s so good!” She held your hand and squeezed softly.

You looked at her pleading eyes and sighed, giving in, “As long as the rest of the people’s heads are staying where they’re meant to be, I’m okay.”

You were not okay. The movie, to you, was a nightmare.

“Cirrus, can we please turn this off? I’m getting seriously nauseous.”

She was apologetic, forgetting your weak human stomach in regard to scary things, “Okay, okay no worries, can I just spoil the rest for you?”

“Sure.” You croaked weakly.

You managed to lighten up significantly, as Cirrus talked about the movie and highlighted important parts in the plot you had missed, she seemed to glow. You loved seeing her get so passionate over something she liked so much.

-

Cumulus:

She’s ready for a scary movie marathon

Cumulus already has a list of the best movies including The Craft, Interview With The Vampire, and Jennifer’s Body just to name a few

She also comes prepared with matching blankets and Halloween-themed onesies for you both to wear

You bake little pumpkin cookies to share between the two of you

Comfy time + spooky movie time = pure happiness 

“So, what do you want to watch first?”

“Uh, how about you choose?” You felt indecisive but warm, all snuggly inside your onesie.

“Okay, let’s start with Carrie, it makes sense because it’s one of my all-time favorites and it was also made such a long time ago.”

“Wait, there’s a chronological order to these?”

“Of course!" She says matter-of-factly, "I’ve been curating this list for years!”

In your periphery you saw that she kept looking over to watch your reactions. You loved the movie, and before you could ask she already queued up the next one.

The two of you stayed up all night watching some of the best scary movies ever made, eventually falling asleep around sunrise like a couple of vampires, covered with cookie crumbs.

-

Sunshine/Aurora:

Loves Halloween movies, not such a big fan of scary movies (also will not watch sad movies)

Her favorites are stop motion, like Corpse Bride, Nightmare Before Christmas, etc.

You debated ad nauseam over Nightmare Before Christmas though, whether it was a Christmas or Halloween movie

(You agreed to disagree, there's so such thing as winning an argument with her)

She likes to talk while watching, so… RIP your ears

She also likes to eat while watching, choosing the crunchiest candies and snacks

“Sunshine, you sweet beam of light, can you please stop chomping so loudly in my ear?”

She looks over to you, bug-eyed, mouth full of salty pretzels and sweet peanut M&M’s. “Mwha-?”

“It’s okay, just, chew what’s in your mouth,” you sighed, you kept supplying snacks for her and yet you never learned, “I’ll just turn the volume up.”

She went back to staring at the screen, witnessing Coraline travel down the tunnel for the first time. Her eyes were wide like she was witnessing a train wreck, she couldn’t look away for a second.

Towards the end of the film:

“Boo! Other Mother you suck! Get your scary spidery fingers away from Coraline!” She shouts and throws a fistful of candy at the screen.

Oh brother. Next, you’ll watch Corpse Bride for the fifth time this week and she’ll start yelling at Lord Barkis.

[taxkha]

i love your art so much i can't even describe it!! for the past year, every time i see it, it inspires me to create and improve so much i can't be jealous; i can only work harder hoping i can invoke the same feeling in someone else one day. your masterful use of loose lines and cozy colors never fails to make me happy on the rainiest day. do you have any tips for establishing such atmospheres, such as color selection or particular poses or expressions? (i don't write very well, sorry if this seems confusing) -an anon who appreciates your work to the fullest

Oh my god anon, you are so sweet, thank you so much (ಥ﹏ಥ) It means so much to hear I inspire someone to draw and I'm happy I can motivate you! <3 Please keep it up and I would love to see what you are making if you ever feel like sharing it! x) I'm so happy to hear my art has such a positive impact on you!! Okay so regarding your questions! When it comes to colors I recently made a coloring tutorial where I also went a bit into how I select colors, how I shade and what my go to effect layers are, you can find it here but it's also currently pinned at the top of my blog! I explained it in my tutorial but I will say it here again, I rely a lot on effect layers. That isn't wrong by any means and is what I would argue most digital artists do but if you want to learn actual color theory that goes beyond what colors compliment each other I unfortunately cant help with that on my own nor do I have any guides at hand to redirect you to :") Speaking of complimentary colors though, knowing your color wheel and which colors contrast each other already helps a lot! My favourites are green/red and orange/blue! To give some examples: green/red

These are less about an atmosphere achieved through lighting but more about the general subject matter of the piece. They are both more ominous and uh, bloody and threatening. And for Orange/Blue

The orange and blue combination is something you see in a lot of movies, for example Mad Max Fury Road or Blade Runner 2049 and many many more which have likely influenced me on what colors I chose in my art to some extend. Paying attention to media other than your own helps a ton and can totally improve on how you approach you art! Like, obviously I draw mostly anime/manga esque art and I get most of my inspiration from manga and video games, but I also try and look at buildings when Im outside, look closely at shot compositions in movies and so on! Other inspirations that have helped me are artbooks from my favorite games/shows/series, if you enjoy those x) Theres probably PDFs to be found of a lot of artbooks online if you don't want to spend money on them. I know you didn't directly ask what my inspirations are lol but they absolutely helped me! OKAY SO now about poses and expressions. Since you mentioned my loose lines, I have very good advice for that: Draw without erasing. Get a scrap book or some lose paper, cheap paper! And a pen you cant erase, such as a fineliner or a ballpoint pen and then draw. Do not go into it with the intent to make an actual good drawing, just. Draw! Draw half finished faces, hands, bodies, cats, whatever you feel like. Fill up the entire page. If you don't want to waste any paper, do it digitally but don't erase! Do that a lot. You will train yourself to draw loser and loser as time goes on. I've always had the habit of doodling onto everything mindlessly and I still do so I never had to actively practice drawing lose lines but thats most likely the reason why I draw the way I do! I actually have some examples from today because I got distracted at work:

I just draw whatever comes to mind until the page is full. I usually don't even keep these pages :") It has helped me a lot though. Uh yeah thats pretty much everything?? Thanks so much again for sending this ask, it was a very sweet thing to wake up to and I hope my rambles here can be of any help and to you good luck in your art endeavors!! :) <3

[calissto]

On Writing Every Day

Possibly the most ubiquitous piece of writing advice: write everyday. Write every day or you’re not a writer, your work has no value, you’ll never get good, you’ll never go pro. Maybe I am at a bit of a disadvantage because I’ve never published a book, but I feel like I have some place to question this motion. 

Don’t write every day. Write often.

Because I agree; writing is like a muscle; you must train it. You have to exercise your vocabulary, your voice, your prose — all as often as you can. It’s essential. But you can do all of these things without gluing yourself to the chair each and every day. Some of us just can’t do that — some of us have obligations; a job, school, sickness, or emergencies. Things come up. And some of us just don’t want to. And that’s okay, too. 

I say write often because it’s a promise you can keep. No matter how pressed for time, you can construct a schedule around often. You can stick to that. Practice becomes joyous instead of overwhelming. You will improve without being weighed down by guilt clouding your judgment, adding on to the already compounding series of worries and doubts you have about your identity as a writer anyway. 

Often can look like this: every other day, a few days a week, a few days a month. Often is up to you. It’s a malleable guideline, and that’s why I like it. It’s about constant practice — routinely coming to dance with your writerly spirit without letting it die nor allowing it to overshadow everything else you are. You can be a writer and other things, too. It’s essential you are other things, too, otherwise you pigeonhole yourself and dull any unique perspective you may bring to the vast, ever-broadening literary table. Have something to share with your peers. Something to bestow. Besides, some of us have dreams besides writing we would like to pursue, and we have every right to pursue them. 

I think writing (well) is so demanding we sometimes forget writing is an incredibly forgiving art. It doesn’t usually feel like it. Writing is difficult (because it is everything) and mystifying and capricious. It feels like the most unforgiving art (because it is: it can be forgiving and unforgiving all at the same time, because it is everything). The muse coquettishly woos us one day then sets us on fire the next. You can have amazing ideas and, propelled by the whirlwind it conjures in your mind, sit down to write and hate everything you put down. The inner critic can be restricting, mean, impossible to satisfy. Plots can get dizzyingly convoluted and messy (and sometimes they don’t come at all! Yay!), wips take years and decades to perfect. You can spend hours, days, weeks, months, years in confusion as to what the fuck you’re even meant to be doing in order to make your story work. Just thinking about all this makes me tired. Writing can be grueling.

But it is also forgiving. 

We can take our time. We can fix our stories again and again and again. We can wait until we're ready for the world to see it.

A contradictory mistress, writing is. The truth is your writing hands will not fall off if you choose to take some time off. You do not really forget to write creatively. Oh, you can get rusty, and it can take some time to get your groove back, but the talent you’ve accumulated (and, perhaps, have been born with) does not evaporate out of thin air just because you step away from your word processor. I, myself, have stepped away from writing for large swaths of time only to return just as strong as I was before. If this is indeed a problem for you, I suggest reading more often — just so you can remain close to writing without actually doing it. You can stay familiar and play with language and characters and plotting without actually doing anything— watch essays on movies and characters. Stay engaged. Don’t feel like your talents will be irrevocably blunted by a break, no matter how long it is.

I often think writers are their own jailers, while other writers you associate with and look up to can function as fellow wardens; what exactly is gonna happen if you don’t write everyday? I’ve come to really detest writing “rules.” There are no rules — they aren’t even rules to be broken. There are guidelines and things that have worked in the past. The trick is to learn what has worked for others, why, and what works for you. Mix and match at your own discretion. The life of a writer is often a solitary, lonesome affair. Not just because you do it yourself, but because you are your own god; a huge part of being a writer is fashioning things for yourself, coming up with your own rules, if you dare to call them as such. You conjure up worlds for your own amusement. So, the way we find ourselves chained to the so-called rules and those who espouse them has become kinda hilarious to me.

Also, go ahead and accept this: a lot of what defines good writing is completely out of your hands. What is popular and lauded as a masterpiece today may be rejected and ignored tomorrow. There are principles to help you bridge the gap of generations — compelling characters, thoughtful plotting, and, oh, idk, basic understanding of storytelling elements etc, but we all will have our own personal talents as writers. Rest assured, you’ll be an acquired taste, so go ahead and study your own talents and strengths as a word person. What are the things you love about writing? What do you like to zero in on? What do you look forward to? Focus on those things, and just try to have a basic grasp of other, essential things.

The point is this: if writing really is that important to you, it will be in your life somehow. You won’t have to make room so much as it will wedge itself into one of the movie theater seats in your mind. Your mind will wander to your wips. You’ll think of your characters at random times. You’ll picture your settings and scenes will just randomly come to you. Don’t worry about it so much! Write often, stay engaged, but if you need a break, take one.

[whereianonymouslypostfics]

Don’t Blame Me

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x reader

Word count: ~4k

Summary: You accidentally venture to the bar where Wanda’s working one night. 

A/N: Here’s the drabble about witnessing Wanda’s drug deal, lol. Enjoy. Again 18+ only! 

Warnings: slight angst and smut

Wanda was already in a foul mood before she even got to the bar. She’d been running around all day trying to get the men who work for her to get their shit together. She was supposed to be at home relaxing with you, but her meeting had been pushed back until tonight due to all of the confusion. If this were anything other than an enormously lucrative deal she was closing, she would let someone else handle it. That said, her faith in her employees today was a little shaky. She needed to make sure that things were settled, and if she had to be here and miss out on time with you, she’d be damned if she didn’t leave here with her money.

She had left you at home earlier, and she hated that she couldn’t promise you that she’d be back anytime soon. She knew that things could take time tonight, especially if someone tried to negotiate, but she hoped that this would be relatively painless.

She has Steve with her as usual, but given the stakes she has a few more people hanging around just in case. She and Steve are both tired and hoping this goes quickly, and almost immediately Steve leaves to get them both a drink. She purposely arrived early, and she needed a few minutes to try and improve her mood before she talks to someone who is most likely going to push her buttons.

“Let’s get this over with, shall we?”

You’re at home with Boone and Fletcher reading a book while television is playing in the background. You’re unable to do one thing at a time, and although you’re mostly reading you are also listening to a television show you’ve seen countless times before while you pet your dog. He’s lying on top of you and since he had a bath recently you let him cover you with fur and only minimal amounts of dirt. You wish that Wanda was here with you, but she was busy tonight and had told you not to wait up. You understood that this meant that you might see her in the morning when you wake up, but you also might not.

You don’t have work tomorrow so you’re thinking about what you are going to do for the day. Wanda’s supposed to be working as usual, but depending on what time she’s back, maybe you can convince her to have a late start to the day. After you finish your book an hour or so later you decide to do something else. It’s dark out, so you only take Boone on a quick walk around the house before returning indoors to consider your next move.

It's only 10 pm and you’re not really tired, but you’re also not in the mood to keep watching movies. You start another book, but only read it for about half an hour before deciding to go out. You’re bored and you want to get a drink, so you text Bucky and ask him what he’s doing. You know that he’s probably busy, but if you don’t at least check in with him before leaving Wanda will get mad at you. You are changed and ready to go before Bucky texts you that he is in fact busy and will be for the night.

You contemplate your options carefully before mentioning your plans to him. He texts back quickly and you have to laugh at his predictable response.  

Do you think Wands would be mad if I went out anyway?

At both of us, yes

You think about the places that you were considering going to and you mention them to Bucky. He takes a little longer to respond and you’re downstairs at this point in the kitchen. You tap your phone on the counter impatiently which catches Boone’s attention and he comes to sit down next to you. You consider taking him with you, but then you have to worry about him ‘working’. You don’t want him to have to do that tonight, so you decide that if Bucky ever responds, you’ll go by yourself and leave him here with his sister.

A few minutes later Bucky’s response comes, and you smile as you grab your keys and head to the garage.

Go to the second one.

Wanda tries not to grow frustrated over the fact that she’s having to go over everything all over again. It’s all in writing, and unfortunately, they’re going over everything point by point just to make sure they’re on the same page. This would be fine, tedious, but fine, except for the fact that he has questions for everything. Wanda’s growing impatient, and Steve’s already stopped paying much attention as he looks around the bar. It’s a full house, and he’s not surprised by this at all. He makes sure that the two on watch are still around before his eyes drift over to the bar.

He could use another drink right now.

When you arrive to the bar, you’re only a little on edge about going in alone. You left Boone at home, and Bucky wasn’t with you, but he’d told you it should be fine. You’re not sure what that meant, but you chose to believe that everything was handled. Somehow. You know that both of you would be in deep shit with Wanda if anything happened, so you figure he’s going to make sure all of his bases are covered.

You walk in and immediately realize it’s packed, and that makes you calmer for some reason. You feel that if it’s super busy, people won’t take notice of you which is what you always want. Your brief look around tells you that you recognize no one, and you head to the bar with a sigh.

You end up sitting down in the middle of two people because it’s the only seat, and the bartender greets you with a quick smile and a ‘I’ll be right with you.”

You’re in no hurry and you just nod before considering what you want your first drink to be. You snack on some peanuts while you wait and you stifle a yawn as the bartender comes up to you to take your order.

“What will you have?”

As you give him your order, you notice that he’s a little on edge but you don’t know what to make of it. You order your go to and watch as he leaves to make it with a frown. You don’t put too much thought into it because you’re here to get drunk, not to psychoanalyze anyone. You’re also just interested in drinking and then cuddling with your dog on the couch later. You take your drink with a smile and take a long sip with a sigh.

You’re already feeling a little bit better.

Wanda’s taking a sip of her drink when she spots you and she nearly spits it out. She was so close to sealing this deal and getting to leave, but the sight of you makes her want to finish even faster. She looks over to Steve to see if he’s noticed you, but he’s distracted by something else so she simply turns back to the brunette across from her with a sigh.

“Is there anything else you’d like to discuss?”

She waits patiently as he flips through the contract again before he shakes his head. She nearly sighs in relief, but she stops short when she watches him look over his shoulder with a smile.

“Nothing to discuss, but would you share one more celebratory round? On me.”

Wanda can’t say no to this without appearing rude so she just smiles before turning to Steve with a pointed look. She looks to the bar as well, more specifically to where her wife’s sitting, but she doesn’t mention you before she asks Steve to get them drinks. She rarely does this and he immediately realizes that something is off. He agrees without protest and stands up to head for the bar.

“Of course.”

You’re on your second drink by the time Steve comes up behind you. The two people sitting next to you keep glancing at you, but you don’t notice as you continue to drink. You’re dissociating a bit now but you definitely notice when someone comes to stand between you and the blonde on your left. He’d been checking you out, not that you’d noticed, and Steve glared at him before turning to you slightly. He was trying to be subtle, but you were a little too distracted to notice and you turn to him in surprise.

“I didn’t think I’d see you here.”

You close your mouth and bite back the threat on the tip of your tongue when you realize who got too close to you. You frown in confusion before looking at Steve and glancing around for your wife.

“Right back at you. What’s…is Wanda here too?”

Steve just nods over to where your wife is sitting with someone you don’t recognize. She’s not looking at you, but you can also tell that she’s not paying attention to the person who’s talking to her. You look back to Steve as three drinks are set down in front of him. You have a lot of questions, but you don’t get to ask any of them before he speaks up and leaves without waiting for your response.

“We’ll be wrapping up soon.”

He leaves and you smile slightly as you take this opportunity to look at your wife. She’s tense where she sits, but you figure that has to do with whatever she’s talking about. You watch until Steve puts the drinks down on the table and Wanda looks up at him before her gaze shifts to you. She’s smiling and she thanks Steve while looking you over curiously. She takes a few seconds to admire your choice of clothing. She briefly wonders if you knew she’d be here because you’re wearing one of her favorite casual outfits on you.

You hadn’t put a lot of thought into it when you’d gotten dressed to go out. Your goal was always to be as comfortable as possible, and since it was a cooler night, you’d put on a pair of shorts that were just long enough to not show too much. Wanda had a love hate relationship with them because she loved when you wore them for her to see, but not anyone else. They showed off your legs and Wanda finds herself wanting to put her hands on you now.

She takes her drink without looking and drains nearly half of it before she forces herself to look away from you. She doesn’t want to draw attention to you, but she steals another glance at you as you grab your glass and drink some as well. She watches as you lean back against the bar which causes your shirt to ride up a little. Wanda catches a glimpse of skin before she realizes that someone is talking to her.

“To a prosperous relationship.”

As Wanda toasts to her successful deal, you turn back around and grab more peanuts with a smile. You know that you probably will need to leave before Wanda does, but the idea that your wife is here and undoubtedly keeping an eye on you makes you near giddy. You consider acting out but you know that you’ll pay for it later, and maybe not until tomorrow. Given how fond you are of instant gratification you decide to just order another slightly stronger drink to help you relax a little more.

You’re halfway through it when you feel your face start to grow hot. This is an unfortunate side effect of drinking alcohol and you know you need to slow down. You look out of the corner of your eye on both sides to see that your drinking companions are both looking at you. You’re not sure why, but you ignore them as you stretch out your sore back with a groan. You close your eyes so you miss the blonde on the left glancing at your cleavage when you arch your back.

You shake yourself out before resting your arm on the bar with a sigh. You feel your body buzzing from both the alcohol and the sudden need that’s snuck up on you. You glance over your shoulder to see that Wanda’s shaking hands and handing something across the table, but Steve is looking around probably out of boredom. You’re about to turn back around but you jump when you feel something cold fall on your leg.

"Shit."

You jump to your feet as you try to shake off the drink that just spilled on you. You frown as you look to the blonde who’d somehow knocked his drink over and practically onto your lap. He apologizes drunkenly and urgently as the bartender comes over with a towel and a glass of water. You sigh in defeat and annoyance as you realize that there’s now beer in your sock and you shake your head.

“I’m so sorry!”

You offer the man a tight smile before claiming that it’s fine even though it’s not. You’re annoyed but you turn to smile sincerely at the bartender who’d brought you stuff to clean up with, but you shake your head.

“Thanks, but I’ll just go clean up in the bathroom.”

You grab your phone and stick it in your back pocket before you head to the bathroom with an exaggerated sigh. Maybe you should have just stayed at home.

Wanda was wrapping things up when she hears a glass fall and shatter against a table. She frowns as she looks away from the man now getting to his feet to see you’re standing and shaking yourself out. She waits until she and Steve are alone until she sits up slightly and eyes the interaction curiously.

You’re trying to keep from getting soaked as the drunk who spilled on you apologizes and hovers uncertainly. When you leave the bar to head toward the bathrooms, she considers following you. She’s finished up a lot sooner than she thought she would and you might also be ready to go home. Her thoughts are interrupted when she watches the blonde who’s just finished wiping up his mess, hurry after you for some reason. She decides to go check on you as well, and she tells Steve she’ll be back soon. He waits for a few seconds before following after her because he has a feeling he knows what’s going to happen next.

You are just grabbing a few paper towels to try to clean the stickiness from your leg and shoe when the door opens behind you. You aren’t sure who you expected to see, but you frown at the sight of the reason why you’re in here in the first place.

“It’s fine, I got it.”

You say this mostly to get the blonde to explain his presence, but you don’t really need him to when he looks you over with interest that you don’t reciprocate.

“Are you sure I can’t help with anything?”

You’re near glaring at him as the door opens again, but it quickly turns to a smile when you see who it is. Your wife reaches out for the blonde’s shirt and she practically throws him back through the door before slamming it behind him.

“We’re good, thanks.”

Your smile widens as Wanda locks the door behind him before turning to you with a smirk. She steps forward and reaches out for the towels in your hands before walking the short distance to the sink.

“I didn’t expect to see you here tonight, detka.”

You smile slightly as you shrug while meeting your wife’s gaze in the mirror. You didn’t expect it either, but you figured you were just lucky. You reach out to take the towels back but Wanda shakes her head as she decides to take over.

“Right back at you.”

Wanda smiles as she kneels so she can clean the IPA off you. You twitch slightly at the cold towel, but you just hum in thanks as Wanda cleans you up. You reach out to play with Wanda’s hair and you smile widely when she groans under her breath.

“I’m glad you’re here, but I wish you hadn’t worn this.”

You frown in confusion as you note Wanda’s serious look as she stands up and turns to the trash now that she’s finished. You’re not sure what Wanda’s talking about because you were pretty sure your wife liked this outfit. You don’t realize you’re right until she turns back to you and reaches out for your flannel shirt. Wanda sighs at the feeling of the soft fabric in her hand. She swears it even smells comfortable, but she might just be a little drunk.

“It made it difficult for me to concentrate. All I could think about was taking it off.”

You smile at the irony of Wanda’s words despite believing what she says. She looks like she wants to devour you, and the only thing you have to say about this is ‘hurry up’. You lean in to kiss the redhead and you return your hands to her hair with a sigh. You back Wanda up against the locked door as you deepen the kiss and you taste the sweet cocktail you’d had earlier mix with her lighter drink.

Wanda groans against your lips when you tug on her jacket in a half-hearted attempt to take it off.

“You’re one to talk, Wands. You always look so good.”

Wanda’s breathing hard as she drops her hands from your waist to your hips. She tugs on your belt and spins you around before she pushes you back so you fall against the door. She licks her lips as she dives in for another kiss that leaves you both breathless. You curse when Wanda moves to your neck and starts to attack the skin there. She’d only been thinking about having you since she noticed you sitting at the bar with your damn short shorts and too tight shirt. Her hands go to your ass and you jump in surprise before moaning when she gives it a teasing squeeze.

“Never as good as you, Y/n.”

You hiss as she bites down on your neck and your hands return to her shoulders to try and push her jacket off. It’s keeping you from feeling her skin against yours and for that you consider setting it on fire. You’re grateful when Wanda takes matters into her own hands and takes it off before throwing it over toward the sink. You reach out and quickly sneak your hands under her shirt so you can feel her flushed skin. She sighs and brings herself flush against you with a smile. She feels you shudder and she can’t help but groan as she gets to her knees again.

“What are you doing?”

Wanda doesn’t offer a verbal response, but she kisses your inner thigh as she runs her hands up your legs. When you try to arch your back and bring her closer, Wanda pushes you back with a growl that nearly makes you moan.

“Stay still, detka.”

You want to listen to your wife, you really do, but as she continues to bite and suck at your skin you can’t help but squirm. Wanda pushes your shorts up as much as possible, but it’s not far enough for either of you. You’re whining as Wanda finally gives up and starts to undo your belt. She kisses the hickeys she’s left on your inner thighs as she starts to take off your shorts with a smile.

She leaves you completely bare as she pulls them down your legs and you can’t help but shiver from the sudden cold. Wanda’s quick to remedy this however as she comes back and pulls you close. You curse in surprise as she grabs the back of your thighs and lifts you up as she bends low enough to throw your legs over her shoulders.

“Wands-.”

You trail off with a hiss as your wife quickly ducks between your legs. She can’t drag it out any longer because the smell of your arousal is making her impatient and desperate for a taste. You curse and moan as your wife’s tongue parts your slick folds. You bury your hands in Wanda’s hair as she pulls you impossibly closer until all of her senses are filled with you. The way you smell, taste, and sound drives Wanda to work harder to please you both. You bite your lip to stifle a moan as she sucks your clit into her mouth making you shudder violently. She pulls away and you think you might cry until she speaks up.

“None of that. I want to hear you.”

You try not to think too hard about how it’s entirely possible that someone is within ear shot. God forbid someone’s standing right outside waiting to use the bathroom. You only have a second to feel self-conscious before Wanda distracts you again.

“Oh, fuck! God, Wands, please…”

You’re bucking against Wanda’s face as you desperately chase your high. You’re breathing hard and you have a painful grip on your wife’s hair as you start to see stars. She can tell you’re close and she doubles her efforts until she feels you stiffen and a new wave of arousal floods her senses. She doesn’t stop when you reach your orgasm and she continues to devour you as you cry out in pleasure.

“Don’t stop, please! D-don’t--!”

Wanda has no intention of stopping until you’re a puddle on the floor. You are well on your way already when you come a second time barely a minute later. You curse and thrash against Wanda’s tongue that’s still teasing you and you think you’re going to pass out. You try to push her away, but Wanda’s persistent and doesn’t budge an inch as she tries to get you off again. You had no idea that your simple outfit would make her this needy, but you’re eternally grateful. You feel Wanda dig her nails into your skin and you hiss under your breath as you brace yourself against the door.

“One more, detka, okay?”

You don’t have the ability to speak. You can only throw your head against the door behind you and moan loudly as Wanda’s fingers disappear between your legs. You don’t realize she’s only holding you up with one arm, but you’re sure the image would only make you come faster. You’re near delirious as your wife thrusts and curls two fingers inside of you. Your legs shake and you near double over when your third orgasm washes over you. You slump against the door and sense the floor is near when Wanda pulls out of you and helps steady you. Her arms and shoulders ache, but she ignores this along with her sore knees in favor of keeping you from collapsing on the dirty floor.

She gives you time to catch your breath and when the room stops spinning you try to stand.

“Are my legs still there? I can’t feel them at all.”

Wanda laughs at this as she helps you to your feet, and supports you more or less as you lean against the door. You sigh in exhaustion as you reach out for your wife to pull her close. You kiss her and groan slightly in embarrassment at the fact that you quite literally came all over her face.

“Let’s get out of here.”

It’s not a question, but you know you wouldn’t have said no to her either way. You still feel your skin tingling and as you look to your wife again and admire her in her entirety, you smile. You can’t wait for your turn.

Masterlist

[lebensmudewing]

Tw: depression and self harm and suicide and everything

I get the whole "improve yourself" thing, and I would like it to be real for me. But it's not.

Every single small thing is a battle for me, you just can't win by willpower. I would like to reach to point where I feel automatic, but it's not a thing for me.

I can sleep on tight schedule for 3 months and then one day I sleep late and already fucked up the whole schedule and it feels like the previous 3 months haven't passed at all, as if sleeping early were this brand new alien thing that I have never heard of.

And is the same with everything. Brushing my teeth, changing my clothes, bathing, making my bed, eating.

Eating properly is the most tough shit ever. Like, out of nowhere my body can decide that only wants to eat oranges and everything else is repulsive. I have survived on coke and doritos for days in the past. I haven't eat a proper meal in weeks by now, only lame sandwiches and tea. Proper food is not...appealing. In other times I can eat only meat and eggs, or only soup, or only salad. I can't eat as a normal person. Like, could I really live on...I don't know, suplements and vitamins put straight on my veins? Because this whole process is shit.

I have had eras of feeling that I can make it, that I can accomplish the things I want, only to be meet with failure again. I try it, I make planners, and tracking, and I declutter, and I apply the whole pack of techniques people name, and go to therapy, and take the meds, and change my diet, and go to the gym, and take sun, and... Only to just be the same exact person in the end, only to just not be where I want at all.

People when looking at me may think that I'm somehow used to live this way, that I'm just different and my concept of bonding, acceptance, company, wellbeing is different. But it's not, I want and crave for everything that everyone else have. I want someone to see me, I want someone to talk to me.

And I try it, but it doesn't work. The other day I was talking with someone and suddenly stopped and told me that it was like I didn't want to be there or something like that, that I was robotic. And it is, lmao, I follow the social script because I'm clueless. My brain is not wired that way, it's just not. Period.

It's laughable at this point how advice like "ask questions, because people like to talk abt themselves" and "read books/watch movies to have interesting conversations" just doesn't work. I can say the exact words someone want and it will still be wrong for some reason. "You don't really feel it". Well, do really people feel the "Hey, how are you, fine, what did you do on weekend?" bit? I don't think so. But special rules write themselves to just not fit what I'm doing.

I think there is more merit in not feeling like doing something and do it because you care about the person than the opposite. I don't care about the new Tiktok trend, but tell me about it! When has someone done that for me like ever? I can't talk about anything that matters to me with anyone. I can't go beyond trivial small talk, I'm kind, I'm polite, I ask questions, I make jokes, I say what I think. It doesn't matter, I'm still alone.

I also try to keep up with all the adult stuff, but I just can't. It's like every month is a "day one", and end up in the same dirty room. Doesn't matter how much I declutter, everything is messy. I literally want to throw everything in the garbage at this point. I "knit" (in two years I have only made like three pieces and the rest is just waste) as a hobby and is a hot mess, there are yarns all over the place. And people is like: "put them in boxes". I already have ton of boxes, I have more boxes than furtinure. I declutter, I put a ton of stuff in the trash and still everything is shit. I literally can't have a clean desk, or a clean bed, or a clean anything.

The only thing that is holding me back of putting everything in the trash and just have one pair of jeans and a blanket is that I don't want to be one step closer from suicide. I want to keep telling myself "no, I have to knit that top, look at these yarn!", "look at this book, I have to read it someday!". If I have nothing, like nothing at all, just empty furtinute, no boxes, no cellphone, no books, no PC, just a blanket, then...??? I would literally kill myself, because there would be nothing for me in the world anymore. There will be no excuse, I would have to face the reality that I can't change, that everything is still the same, that I will never be that person, the who knit silly pretty stuff and read books like in the past and enjoy things and is seen.

I also feel like I want to cut myself. I was literally thinking about you know what my wrists, in a suicidal way, a few minutes ago. I recovered from self harm years ago, I don't do it, but my mind keep telling me that it would be a great option. Isn't funny how basic shit like sleeping, eating, changing clothes is the most problematic stuff that just can't stick but self harm is there even after years of not doing it? The shit writes itself. I would like to see the blood flowing away, and feel pain, and feel that I hate myself and end it all and stop feeling and thinking, and being.

I have the expectations on me, I still keep breathing, I'm still here. But I grow resentful of people that "loves" me. They don't let me die, I have to live for them, but they are not living my life. They have one, without me, and are happy. I'm a burden and they judge me and they can't stand me. I see it. I fear trying it and be found, I fear trying it and being stopped. Let me die, let me die. No, the pain is not temporary, no, I can't change, no, I will never live a good life.

[despazito]

Idk in my idyllic world the use of ai could improve animation workflow and catapult junior level artists into creative leads roles faster if there's less menial work to be done.

We could have artists still in charge of creative decisions and drawing vis dev while the computer assists with the most labour intensive steps of making shows or movies.

For simpler shows for instance it would be neat I think if you could run your storyboard through a script and have the machine import all relevant assets staged to the best of its abilities instead of manually having to drag props and rigs into your shot and scaling everything before you can even begin to animate (does that tech exist already? Probably).

Like nowadays we already have animation programs where you can set deformer limitations.

i could imagine a possible future where software includes or does subscription services to ai trained on work by artists who got paid to draw or animate template motions or anatomy references. something like generating smart bones could become an automated feature. i can maybe even foresee tech that can look at a character model or design sheet you've drawn and generate a rig for it. in all these scenarios you would have to correct stuff and tune things to your liking, but it gives a considerable head start to the work.

More dynamic shots could be made on smaller budgets if we gave ai props or backgrounds and said "give me this but rotated a little" instead of drawing the same damn chair from 10 angles as a prop artist, I refuse to believe anyone's passion in life is to make prop turnarounds or clean up inbetweens.

what if you had an ai that was trained on drawings of heads at every angle, animals in every angle, a slew of expressions and mouth shapes, then gave it a character ref drawn from a few angles and bam it makes the vtuber rig for you.

this still leaves space for original art and would still require a skilled creative to make something look it's best, that could be a gig. more animators could potentially begin their own smaller studios if cartoons are way easier to make. if anyone could potentially make their own movie in the future, charge people to do it right! no computer can replace a human knowledgeable in film or drawing to guide it in the right direction. without creative people at a production's core, i think the future of ai film is just a very, very, sophisticated version of goanimate than can also do art theft.

this could become the weird futuristic version of "i wrote this children's book can you illustrate it for me?" but instead your mom's friend wants to commission a show pilot they wrote a screenplay for.

When animation was drawn on cels we had entire painting departments whose job it was to paint each individual frame by literal numbers, and it was tedious!! Now we have the paint bucket tool for digital coloring, and software like Toonboom lets you color in one frame then generate the coloring for the proceeding frames. We still have a colour and painting department, it's just different work now. but now we also have people making full color cartoons from their basements because Flash was released for personal computers with said digital tech along with computer generated motion tweening for animation!!

Junior animator and junior bg painter or prop artist roles will probably face an overhaul where more work can be done with less people. But the utopian outcome would be these junior artists can sooner take up lead or supervisor positions where they get to execute their own ideas instead of someone else's. more shows or movies could be produced with less crew for less money, slashing costs when deciding what to greenlight or to take a risk on new talent. The problem is capitalism would make it suck because it only cares about exploiting workers for those cheapest costs possible and forego the necessary human crew required to make the difference between machine-assisted productions and pure ai generated slop

[captainlunaxmen]

Be My Queen

Chapter 6

Eddie Munson x reader x Steve Harrington

This is a repost since the old blog doesn't work anymore. 🥰

Chapter summary: someone's back

Chapter warnings: none.

The sun lingering through the hospital's windows wakes me up, luckily no unbearable nightmares, not that I remember at least... still luckily.

I slowly open my eyes, getting used to the light and I notice someone talking, or better reading something. Once I focus a little more I recognise Dustin's voice.

" 'this thing all things devours: birds, beasts, trees, flowers; gnats iron, bites steel; grinds hard stones to meal; slays Kings, ruins towns, and high mountain down. What am I?' "

Before he can go on reading I cut him off.

"Time!" I say sitting up slowly.

"Y/n!" He exclaims excited.

"Hey, boy genius. How is it going?"

"It's great. Do you feel better? Steve told me you were still in pain yesterday" he checks.

"Oh yes. Actually, it's more stingy than painful, which is good improvement" I smile at him to reassure him "where are the others?"

"Interviewed by the police..?" He mumbles.

"What for?"

"Well... for Eddie's innocence, your accident... stuff like that" he explains "they already talked to me so... I offered to be here for when you woke up" he sends me a sweet smile.

"I hope everyone realises Eddie is innocent" I chuckle "I mean... take one look at that guy and you realise he couldn't hurt a fly"

"I know right!" He laughs.

"Is that my copy of the Hobbit?" I ask looking down at the book in his hands.

"Yeah, Robin and Nancy brought it here when they arrive to drop me off and take Steve. I didn't wake you, did I?" He suddenly looks guilty and is about to apologise.

"No, no, Dustin, I think you helped getting me out of a nightmare" I reassure him.

He looks a little relieved, but soon his expression turns into a concerning one.

"I'm really sorry, Y/n" He softly says.

"Can we please invoce a council with everyone so I can make it clear that it was no one's fault?" I chuckle "you have nothing to be sorry for, just like Max and just like El. And just like everbody else."

"But..."

"Hush. Nope. I don't wanna hear it. No one's fault" I lift my hand up to stop him "repeat after me: it was no one's fault"

He stays silent, letting out a small chuckle and shaking his head.

"C'mon, Dusty, repeat after me. It was no one's fault"

"It was no one's fault" he says it, way too quietly.

"What? What did you say?" I pretend not to have heard him.

"It was no one's fault" he says a little louder.

"That's right, also next time something like this happens-"

"Hey! No! It won't happen again! And even if it does I don't think any of us will let you be the bait again" he cuts me off, with a stern look.

"Alright, alright... I was just saying-" I try to say.

"Nope"

"But-"

"Aahhh!" He uses his hands to cover his ears.

"Dustin-"

"I said no"

"Alright!" I exclaim with a laugh "alright, there won't be a next time. Got it" I raise my hands up on surrender.

"Exactly" he smiles brightly. "But, I guess you earned the right to choose the movies for the next... uh... 4 movie nights"

"Really? Yes!" I cheer then I stop "Wait... only 4? Man, I almost died! Ten at least!"

"We all almost died." He clarifies.

"Oh now you want to specify I wasn't the only one, uh!?" I scoff chuckling.

"Alright... the next 5 times"

"9"

"What? Nah, 6"

"8"

"Oh c'mon, you chose the last time too though!"

"Alright... 7, but I also get to choose what to eat" I take out my hand for him to shake.

He looks at me and let out a sigh, he grabs my hand and shakes it.

"Deal"

"Always a pleasure dealing with you" I smile at him. "I'll make pasta" I wink.

His face lightens up immediately.

"Your pasta?" He asks.

"Of course" I chuckle at his satisfied expression.

"But don't stress yourself too much" He immediately adds.

"Oh, not you too" I laugh exasperated.

"You didn't exactly went for a walk!" He exclaims.

"I'm fine" I laugh, then I calm down "I'm fine, Dusty" I say softly to him.

Dustin's face changes again, from serene to almost disconsolate.

"Dustin" I try to regain his attention "Dustin, what did we say?"

"It was no one's fault" he says.

"Good, now come here and give a good Dustin-hug" I open my arms waiting for him, letting out a sigh of relief when he finally hugs me.

When he pulls away I notice a little tear on his face, so I quickly wipe it away.

"It's all good now, okay?"

"Yes... yes you are right" he nods.

"We did it again"

We high-five and in that moment there's a knock on the door.

"Can I come in?"

It's Steve.

"Sure!" Dustin yells and I laugh.

Steve opens the door and lingers a little before entering.

"Hey, sweetheart, how do you feel?" He asks.

"I'm feeling better, thanks. Henderson here helped" I say patting Dustin's shoulder.

"Good, that's good" Steve mutters, a small smile crepping up his face, he quickly glances at the door "so... are you in the mood for a visit?"

"I guess..." I say, a little sceptical after seeing his behaviour. "What's going on?"

"Oh nothing, love" he smile and then opens the door and someone walks in.

My blood immediately runs cold, I tense immediately, as soon as Hopper walks in... I thought my hallucinations were getting better... and now he's using Hopper, too.

No no no no no... not this.

"No, no, please..." I start sobbing, and I cover my eyes.

"What's wrong?" I hear Dustin whispering to me.

"I thought the hallucinations were... were getting better... I can't." I sob.

"What are you talking about?"

"I see Hopper standing there... I... he's using Hop to torment me, " I explain. "Please... make it stop, make it stop" I sob into the pillow as I curl up in bed.

"Y/n," Steve's hand gently caresses my back. "Love? He is here."

"What?" I ask, confused.

"Hop is here." He tells me.

"What... how...no... he's..." I stutter.

"I honestly don't know, but he is here. He's alive. Do you trust me? You know I wouldn't mess with you."

I slowly look up to him, seeing how sincere he is, and even more slowly, I look to the door.

I look at Hopper standing there, a visible worried look on his face. He doesn't know what to do. He softly smiles at me, to reassure me everything is fine.

"He's really here?" I ask Steve and Dustin.

"Yes, babe,"

"Yap"

I cautiously stand up and walk to Hopper, I look up at him to check if he's actually here or not.

"Is it you? Like... for real?" I ask.

"It is" he smiles, eyes watering a little.

"Oh my god" I don't waste any more time and hug him. He immediately reciprocates.

"Everything is gonna be fine now. I'm here, kid," he says softly to me once he lets me go.

"I'm sorry... I... I thought.."

"It's okay, they told me everything." Hop reassures me "I'm sorry I wasn't here,"

"Oh don't say that to her. She hates it," Dustin chimes in.

"He's right " I say wiping away the tears "it's not like anyone could've stopped me"

"Of course" he chuckles "too stubborn for your own good."

"I wonder where I took it from" I tease.

"She's right, you know" Joyce appears from behind him, I just realise she's been here the whole time.

"Oh my god, hi" I quickly hug her too.

"Hey, sweetheart" she holds me tight, she then lets me go and cups one of my cheeks "You got us so worried"

"I'm sorry" I chuckle.

"When they told us you ended up here... God... even though you two are not related by blood, you definitely took your stubbornness from him"

"Well... I'm definitely proud of it" Hopper interferes with a big smile. "Oh... and they also let something slip"

"What?" I look from him to Steve, who has a guilty look on his face.

Before he can answer the door opens once again, only to let Eddie walk in, dressed in his own clothes, meaning he's ready to be dismissed.

"We bumped into Eddie on the way here..." Steve explains pointing to Eddie.

"Oh..." I nervously chuckle.

"Oh indeed."

"Yeah... I wanted to apologise" Eddie awkwardly scratches his neck "I knew you were dead and... you kinda spooked me... I'm sorry"

"What..?" I chuckle amused.

"He used me as a shield... and then he pushed me toward your dad.." Steve explains, rather exasperated.

"Aaw, poor baby" I joke.

"And while I was explaining to this dingus he wasn't a ghost-"

"Steve blurted out we are now.. a thing" Eddie finishes awkwardly, still avoiding eye contact with... everyone.

"That he did" Hopper says.

"And...? Do you have a problem with that?" I ask, cautiously.

"As long as they won't hurt you, I'm fine with it" he smiles, almost devilishly, "it will only mean I won't have to cover up a murder... anytime soon at least."

I see Eddie and Steve share a, not very subtle, scared look. They then turn to me asking for help, but I can't help but laugh. I know Hopper is only messing with them.

"Alright!" Joyce claps her hands to change the subject. "How about after you are dismissed we all gather around and have dinner together? Uh?"

"Definitely" I support her saving my boyfriends from Hop.

"C'mon, let's go, Jim. C'mon, you scared them enough" Joyce gently grabs Hop's Armstrong guide him out.

"Eh... not exactly enough. But there's plenty of time" he teases. "Take care, kids. Anything happens you call me, alright?"

"Sure, Hop" I smile at him.

"I'll come check on you tomorrow" he says.

I wave at them as they walk out.

"What a perfect way to say to my father we're in a relationship... Great job" I laugh.

"Yeah, you couldn't have chosen a better way, guys?" Dustin asks, with a amused grin.

"Hey don't look at me, man, he did it all" Eddie defends himself.

"Yeah yeah, it just came out... I'm sorry" he says, coming up to me and gently taking my hand in his.

"Hey, it's fine. I never thought I'd ever have to tell him something like that in the first place... so... it's actually better this way" I smile at them.

"He... he wouldn't actually.. murder us right?" Eddie asks.

"In the most brutal way" I joke and he glares at me.

"Very funny" he sarcastically says.

"I know" I wink at him.

"I came here to tell you they're dismissing me, by the way" he tells me "Wayne's outside to take me home. As a free man, nonetheless"

"Rightfully" I smile" do you feel better, though? Like actually okay?" I ask him.

"Yeah, yeah, I do, don't worry, my beautiful girl" he says getting closer to me and Steve.

"Alright, I'm still here" Dustin announces.

"Not my problem" was Eddie simple answer.

"Okay. My queue to leave. Bye, guys, get better Y/n. Bye" he quickly rushes out of the room.

"There you go... you scared Dustin" I say.

"Thankfully" Steve comments.

"You two are terrible" I laugh.

Eddie smirks before kissing me softly on the lips and then lets Steve do the same.

"About going home..." Steve starts " my parents won't be home for the next... uh... couple of months. Not surprising, I know, but... well... if you guys want to stay over and... maybe start to actually figure our whole situation out... we could"

"That's not a bad idea, Harrington." Eddie's still smirking "what do you say, sweetheart?"

"I say it's a great idea" I say and the kiss each boy on the cheek.

"And once you're out of here, we're taking you to the most amazing date you can ever imagine" Steve declares with a big loving smile.

"Easy there, Stevie... let's not create expectations we can't live up to" Eddie says making me laugh.

"Even a simple pizza and a movie at home would be absolutely perfect" I assure them.

"See?" Steve points at me looking at Eddie "she has no expectations at all. We're safe"

"Yeah... I guess you're right, man" Eddie agrees.

"C'mon, don't let your uncle wait too long." I say to Eddie kissing him.

"Oh fine fine. I'll leave." He sweetly smile down at me "you better get better soon. I can't deal with this guys here alone"

"Yeah, please, don't leave me with him" Steve begs.

"Oh c'mon, you two will be fine"

"Doesn't matter. Get better soon, we want to spoil you" Steve softly says, still playing with my fingers.

"I promise" I smile at them.

"Alright, let's get going. I'll prepare the house for the both of you" Steve says and gives me a kiss.

"Fine, I'll meet Wayne and go home to prepare my things instead" it's Eddie's turn to kiss me.

"See you two tomorrow" I wave at them as they exit.

I go sit on the bed taking everything in.

Hopper is alive... I definitely need him to tell me everything. It's so good to know it wasn't one of my hallucinations.

We're gonna be a family again, with El too. I can't believe it, it's great.

Everything is actually going to be fine.

[daisyvisions]

SOFT HOURS (because I’m sick)

What are your thoughts in how the members of TBZ would take care of you when your sick? Maybe even a small story for each of them🥹 (by “story”, I mean like a paragraph lmfao)

(first off, I know you're not sick anymore and this was sent in months ago so I'm so sorry this was late but I hope you still like it huhu 🥺)

Sangyeon - The Doctor

He will always check up on you every hour of the day. He would monitor your temperature on his phone, give your meds on the dot, and make sure you’re resting well. And when the sickness has passed he will have a bag of things you still need to take in order to stay healthy. He’s traditional that way, but it all comes from the heart.

Jacob - The Mother Hen

Incredibly caring and will make sure you have what you need (even if there are times you don’t need certain items). Likes to give you hugs or stay by your side most of the time and maybe even leave some forehead kisses. Most of all, will keep asking if you are okay and will not stop feeding you soup and fruits. Not to mention, everything he cooks always smells so good!

Younghoon - The Worried One

Constantly asks how you are feeling and makes sure that you will not move a finger while you’re resting in bed. One small movement from you like getting up to refill your water he will scold you (lovingly). He just wants to be sure you’re eating and resting as much as you can and that it’s his job to take care of you. (But don’t tell him you went to the bathroom on your own at night or carried a few groceries from the front door or else…)

Hyunjae - The Goofy Guy

Loves to lighten the mood and make you feel like you aren’t even sick at all! All the jokes, the teasing, and light tickles… he just wants to make you smile despite being sick. Might even come into your room with doctor’s clothes to get into character honestly (yes he even brought all the equipment a doctor would usually have on him). After all, laughter is the greatest medicine 😉

Juyeon - The Nurse

Mostly either by your side or whenever you call he will be right there. He has almost everything prepared for you in his bag or in your room no matter what time of day. Does his best to recharge your energy but if you don’t feel like eating for example, he won’t force it. Will definitely hold your hand while you’re asleep.

Kevin - The Entertainer

As the title suggests, it’s watching tv shows and movie marathons with this one. Will bring anything to keep you entertained be it showing you tiktok videos, reading books, playing card games if you’re up for it, and so on. He might even go over the top and bring a portable karaoke set and you best believe he’s gonna make you sing (don’t worry, he always sanitizes the mics before using them!)

Chanhee - The Silent Helper

He doesn’t really say much because he would prefer that his actions speak louder than words. Whether it’s cooking for you, helping you get up and do other tasks, hugging or leaving you kisses, he’ll do it all. And usually as soon as you wake up you’ll always find what you need by your bedside table because he’s always ten steps ahead of you. But don’t forget to thank him, because when you do his flustered face is always the cutest. 🥰

Changmin - The Motivator

Definitely the type that likes to praise you every time you finish your food, take your meds, or show any sign of improvement. He always messages you things like “You can do it!” or “You’ll get better!”. No matter what state he might be in, he will always smile and cheer you on. He never fails to be there for you in any shape or form.

Haknyeon - The Sweetheart

Is very loving and caring naturally, so what more when you’re sick? Likes to climb into bed with you and cuddle you until you sleep, stroking your hair and overall making sure you feel loved by him (even if you already know how much he does). He might even bring your planned date to you by setting up a cute table, cook your favorite food and make the mood romantic. At this point, are you even sick?

Sunwoo - The Coddler

Oh boy, this man will make it like a drama when you’re sick. “Oh no! My baby is sick” “Don’t move a muscle” and if you cough he’s gonna run so quick and ask if you’re okay. He’s worse than Younghoon at this point, he practically babies you! Not to mention gets all whiney and pouty when you don’t listen to him and do some things yourself like getting water. “You did WHAT without me? Baby seriously… 🥺”

Eric - The Energizer

The first thing he’ll do is bring all the items, food, medicines, vitamins, etc. That will get you energized and have a faster recovery. Seriously this guy has it all in his bag, he’s practically Marry Poppins! Not only that, but his mood is that of a ray of sunshine and full of energy, you sometimes forget you’re sick when you’re around him! He’s the perfect guy to have especially when you just want to feel better asap! A literal battery to help you get charged!

[rachelbethhines]

Things That I Use To Help Manage My ADHD and Executive Dysfunction

1. To Do Lists

I know, I know.

Making a list is boring. I lose the paper. I forget to make the to do list.

Believe me, I know.

I've been there, but trust me it does help once you get into the habit.

Here's some tips on how to get started

Try making your list in a digital app or a document file so you don't lose it

Sticky notes in a place you're sure to see them

An erasable board like a marker board or a chalkboard that you keep up in a specific place and never move. Like on the wall or the fridge.

Put "make 'to do' list" on the to do list so you don't forget to do it

Set aside a certain time to fill out or check off the list each day. Consistency is key.

Use calendars, alarms, and timers liberally to keep track of appointments and to manage your time so you don't hyper-focus on something to the determinant of more important things

But be flexible for things that don't have deadlines or appointments. Don't beat yourself up if something doesn't get done, just add it back onto the list for next time

2. Randomizers

Part of the problem with executive dysfunction is being overwhelmed by choice. So I keep a few randomizer websites booked marked that I use regularly

Wheel pickers

List randomizers

Random number generators

Like I keep my list of projects on a wheel picker app. And my chores that I don't have deadlines for on another. When making my to do list I'll spin the wheel to pick the project or chore that I'm going to work on that day.

I do the same when picking out albums to listen to or movies to watch so I don't go doom scrolling while wasting time deciding.

3. Meal Planning

Similar to the above, I take one day out of the week to draw up my meal plan for the next week.

Use this time to take stock of your pantry and fridge. What needs to get used up?

Anything special you want to fix over the week or weekend? Save the recipes to a document or leave a bookmark in your cookbook

Overwhelmed with choices or just don't know what to do with certain ingredients? Try a randomizer or an app like supercook to come up with ideas.

After you've taken inventory of your kitchen and figured out any special recipes you want to make, go ahead and fill out your grocery list

Set aside time on your to do list for shopping, meal prep, and cooking through out the week.

Pre-plan what days/times you are going to eat out or get takeout and work that into the meal plan/budget

Budget not only your money but also your time. How long will this recipe take to prep/cook? How much effort will it require of me? Is there any shortcuts I can take to make things easier, like buying my veggies already diced?

Try using an app to keep track of your meal plan, grocery list, and recipes so that they're all in one place

4. Mental Health Apps

I like Booster Buddy, but it's no longer supported for newer devices. I have also used Finch. But at the end of the day it doesn't matter which app you choose.

The point of having a program dedicated for mental health is to have a handy way to check in on yourself and see how you are feeling. Many apps will offer visual cues to allow you to break down your motivation and energy levels.

This will help give you a guideline for the day so you don't stretch yourself too thin.

A good app will also offer little suggestions and tips to help improve your mood or provide genteel reminders for small things that help with self care.

But most importantly it will help you spot patterns over time so you can better notice ongoing problems or see gradual changes as you get better.

5. Finding and Avoiding What Triggers My Dissociation

This is the hardest one.

I suffer from Maladaptive Daydreaming on top everything else which only makes my ADD and Executive Dysfunction even worse.

For others it maybe obsessive compulsion or a tendency to hyper-focus.

Things that I found that can be triggers are boredom, anxiety, isolation, health/dietary complications, and even the weather.

So here's some things I noticed that help

Set aside a certain time during the day to read/watch the news and then ignore it for the rest of the day. Yes be informed, but don't obsess.

Get your news from actual reputable news sources and not social media! Avoid algorithms feeding you negativity.

If you want to be more politically active schedule time for it, get involved with actual charities or political organizations, and then go about your regular business afterwards

Limit social media time. For me it's mornings before work for about 30mins, and then maybe an hour after work.

Curate your online experience. Block what you need to. Unfollow who you see fit. Social media should be fun not stressful.

Talk to other people! Make plans to hang out on weekends or call/text someone during the weekday. Try to make contact with another human being in some form everyday for at least a few mins, even if it's just online in a discord chat.

Have a book or notepad handy for when you get bored at work. Read, write, or draw during your downtime so you don't start staring off into space.

Keep a short list of fun things to do handy if you feel bored at home.

Set aside time to daydream/worry/plan/meditate/decompress. You need to mentally unwind at some point. The goal is to have that time per-planned so that it doesn't distract from other needed tasks. Getting into a routine with that time will also help.

Eating enough iron/vitamin C/protein ect. Food is energy and you need energy to focus. Meal planning will help with this.

TAKE YOUR MEDS!!!

Sometimes the weather will make you groggy, irritated, or anxious. There's not much you can do about this other than to accept it and just try your best.

You can however plan for bad weather ahead of time. Go to the National Weather site to find out about upcoming weather in your area and to figure what you need to be prepared for it. Try getting into the habit of doing this regularly.

[lunamadhatter99]

Be My Queen

SteveHarringtonXFem!readerXEddieMunson

Part 6

Here we go! This chapter is a lot shorter than usual, I apologise, but 1) I wanted to post something, 2)I want the next chapter more focused on something else.

Hope you're gonna like it anyway and if you want to be tagged in the next chapter let me know and have a great day!!

Chapter summary: someone's back.

Chapter warnings: none... I think. Surprising!

Tag list:

@once-upon-an-imagine

@munsonology

@cutepumpkin4

@summerbrooksblog

@iheartmyguitars

@trickylittlewitch

@eddiesguitarskills

@justheretoreadleavemealone

The sun lingering through the hospital's windows wakes me up, luckily no unbearable nightmares, not that I remember at least... still luckily. 

I slowly open my eyes, getting used to the light and I notice someone talking, or better reading something. Once I focus a little more I recognise Dustin's voice.

" 'this thing all things devours: birds, beasts, trees, flowers; gnats iron, bites steel; grinds hard stones to meal; slays Kings, ruins towns, and high mountain down. What am I?' "

Before he can go on reading I cut him off.

"Time!" I say sitting up slowly. 

"Y/n!" He exclaims excited.

"Hey, boy genius. How is it going?"

"It's great. Do you feel better? Steve told me you were still in pain yesterday" he checks.

"Oh yes. Actually, it's more stingy than painful, which is good improvement" I smile at him to reassure him "where are the others?"

"Interviewed by the police..?" He mumbles.

"What for?"

"Well... for Eddie's innocence, your accident... stuff like that" he explains "they already talked to me so... I offered to be here for when you woke up" he sends me a sweet smile.

"I hope everyone realises Eddie is innocent" I chuckle "I mean... take one look at that guy and you realise he couldn't hurt a fly"

"I know right!" He laughs.

"Is that my copy of the Hobbit?" I ask looking down at the book in his hands.

"Yeah, Robin and Nancy brought it here when they arrive to drop me off and take Steve. I didn't wake you, did I?" He suddenly looks guilty and is about to apologise.

"No, no, Dustin, I think you helped getting me out of a nightmare" I reassure him.

He looks a little relieved, but soon his expression turns into a concerning one.

"I'm really sorry, Y/n" He softly says.

"Can we please invoce a council with everyone so I can make it clear that it was no one's fault?" I chuckle "you have nothing to be sorry for, just like Max and just like El. And just like everbody else."

"But..."

"Hush. Nope. I don't wanna hear it. No one's fault" I lift my hand up to stop him "repeat after me: it was no one's fault"

He stays silent, letting out a small chuckle and shaking his head.

"C'mon, Dusty, repeat after me. It was no one's fault"

"It was no one's fault" he says it, way too quietly. 

"What? What did you say?" I pretend not to have heard him.

"It was no one's fault" he says a little louder.

"That's right, also next time something like this happens-"

"Hey! No! It won't happen again! And even if it does I don't think any of us will let you be the bait again" he cuts me off, with a stern look.

"Alright, alright... I was just saying-" I try to say.

"Nope"

"But-"

"Aahhh!" He uses his hands to cover his ears.

"Dustin-"

"I said no"

"Alright!" I exclaim with a laugh "alright, there won't be a next time. Got it" I raise my hands up on surrender.

"Exactly" he smiles brightly. "But, I guess you earned the right to choose the movies for the next... uh... 4 movie nights"

"Really? Yes!" I cheer then I stop "Wait... only 4? Man, I almost died! Ten at least!"

"We all almost died." He clarifies.

"Oh now you want to specify I wasn't the only one, uh!?" I scoff chuckling.

"Alright... the next 5 times"

"9"

"What? Nah, 6"

"8"

"Oh c'mon, you chose the last time too though!"

"Alright... 7, but I also get to choose what to eat" I take out my hand for him to shake.

He looks at me and let out a sigh, he grabs my hand and shakes it.

"Deal"

"Always a pleasure dealing with you" I smile at him. "I'll make pasta" I wink.

His face lightens up immediately. 

"Your pasta?" He asks.

"Of course" I chuckle at his satisfied expression. 

"But don't stress yourself too much" He immediately adds.

"Oh, not you too" I laugh exasperated. 

"You didn't exactly went for a walk!" He exclaims.

"I'm fine" I laugh, then I calm down "I'm fine, Dusty" I say softly to him.

Dustin's face changes again, from serene to almost disconsolate.

"Dustin" I try to regain his attention "Dustin, what did we say?"

"It was no one's fault" he says.

"Good, now come here and give a good Dustin-hug" I open my arms waiting for him, letting out a sigh of relief when he finally hugs me.

When he pulls away I notice a little tear on his face, so I quickly wipe it away.

"It's all good now, okay?"

"Yes... yes you are right" he nods.

"We did it again"

We high-five and in that moment there's a knock on the door.

"Can I come in?"

It's Steve.

"Sure!" Dustin yells and I laugh. 

Steve opens the door and lingers a little before entering.

"Hey, sweetheart, how do you feel?" He asks.

"I'm feeling better, thanks. Henderson here helped" I say patting Dustin's shoulder.

"Good, that's good" Steve mutters, a small smile crepping up his face, he quickly glances at the door "so... are you in the mood for a visit?"

"I guess..." I say, a little sceptical after seeing his behaviour. "What's going on?"

"Oh nothing, love" he smile and then opens the door and someone walks in.

My blood immediately runs cold, I tense immediately, as soon as Hopper walks in... I thought my hallucinations were getting better... and now he's using Hopper, too.

No no no no no... not this.

"No, no, please..." I start sobbing, and I cover my eyes.

"What's wrong?" I hear Dustin whispering to me.

"I thought the hallucinations were... were getting better... I can't." I sob.

"What are you talking about?"

"I see Hopper standing there... I... he's using Hop to torment me, " I explain. "Please... make it stop, make it stop" I sob into the pillow as I curl up in bed.

"Y/n," Steve's hand gently caresses my back. "Love? He is here."

"What?" I ask, confused.

"Hop is here." He tells me.

"What... how...no... he's..." I stutter.

"I honestly don't know, but he is here. He's alive. Do you trust me? You know I wouldn't mess with you."

I slowly look up to him, seeing how sincere he is, and even more slowly, I look to the door.

I look at Hopper standing there, a visible worried look on his face. He doesn't know what to do. He softly smiles at me, to reassure me everything is fine.

"He's really here?" I ask Steve and Dustin.

"Yes, babe,"

"Yap"

I cautiously stand up and walk to Hopper, I look up at him to check if he's actually here or not.

"Is it you? Like... for real?" I ask.

"It is" he smiles, eyes watering a little.

"Oh my god" I don't waste any more time and hug him. He immediately reciprocates.

"Everything is gonna be fine now. I'm here, kid," he says softly to me once he lets me go.

"I'm sorry... I... I thought.."

"It's okay, they told me everything." Hop reassures me "I'm sorry I wasn't here,"

"Oh don't say that to her. She hates it," Dustin chimes in.

"He's right " I say wiping away the tears "it's not like anyone could've stopped me"

"Of course" he chuckles "too stubborn for your own good."

"I wonder where I took it from" I tease.

"She's right, you know" Joyce appears from behind him, I just realise she's been here the whole time.

"Oh my god, hi" I quickly hug her too.

"Hey, sweetheart" she holds me tight, she then lets me go and cups one of my cheeks "You got us so worried"

"I'm sorry" I chuckle.

"When they told us you ended up here... God... even though you two are not related by blood, you definitely took your stubbornness from him"

"Well... I'm definitely proud of it" Hopper interferes with a big smile. "Oh... and they also let something slip"

"What?" I look from him to Steve, who has a guilty look on his face.

Before he can answer the door opens once again, only to let Eddie walk in, dressed in his own clothes, meaning he's ready to be dismissed.

"We bumped into Eddie on the way here..." Steve explains pointing to Eddie.

"Oh..." I nervously chuckle.

"Oh indeed."

"Yeah... I wanted to apologise" Eddie awkwardly scratches his neck "I knew you were dead and... you kinda spooked me... I'm sorry"

"What..?" I chuckle amused.

"He used me as a shield... and then he pushed me toward your dad.." Steve explains, rather exasperated. 

"Aaw, poor baby" I joke.

"And while I was explaining to this dingus he wasn't a ghost-"

"Steve blurted out we are now.. a thing" Eddie finishes awkwardly, still avoiding eye contact with... everyone.

"That he did" Hopper says.

"And...? Do you have a problem with that?" I ask, cautiously.

"As long as they won't hurt you, I'm fine with it" he smiles, almost devilishly, "it will only mean I won't have to cover up a murder... anytime soon at least."

I see Eddie and Steve share a, not very subtle, scared look. They then turn to me asking for help, but I can't help but laugh. I know Hopper is only messing with them.

"Alright!" Joyce claps her hands to change the subject. "How about after you are dismissed we all gather around and have dinner together? Uh?"

"Definitely" I support her saving my boyfriends from Hop.

"C'mon, let's go, Jim. C'mon, you scared them enough" Joyce gently grabs Hop's Armstrong guide him out.

"Eh... not exactly enough. But there's plenty of time" he teases. "Take care, kids. Anything happens you call me, alright?"

"Sure, Hop" I smile at him.

"I'll come check on you tomorrow" he says.

I wave at them as they walk out.

"What a perfect way to say to my father we're in a relationship... Great job" I laugh.

"Yeah, you couldn't have chosen a better way, guys?" Dustin asks, with a amused grin.

"Hey don't look at me, man, he did it all" Eddie defends himself. 

"Yeah yeah, it just came out... I'm sorry" he says, coming up to me and gently taking my hand in his.

"Hey, it's fine. I never thought I'd ever have to tell him something like that in the first place... so... it's actually better this way" I smile at them.

"He... he wouldn't actually.. murder us right?" Eddie asks.

"In the most brutal way" I joke and he glares at me.

"Very funny" he sarcastically says.

"I know" I wink at him.

"I came here to tell you they're dismissing me, by the way" he tells me "Wayne's outside to take me home. As a free man, nonetheless"

"Rightfully" I smile" do you feel better, though? Like actually okay?" I ask him.

"Yeah, yeah, I do, don't worry, my beautiful girl" he says getting closer to me and Steve.

"Alright, I'm still here" Dustin announces.

"Not my problem" was Eddie simple answer.

"Okay. My queue to leave. Bye, guys, get better Y/n. Bye" he quickly rushes out of the room.

"There you go... you scared Dustin" I say.

"Thankfully" Steve comments.

"You two are terrible" I laugh.

Eddie smirks before kissing me softly on the lips and then lets Steve do the same.

"About going home..." Steve starts " my parents won't be home for the next... uh... couple of months.  Not surprising, I know, but... well... if you guys want to stay over and... maybe start to actually figure our whole situation out... we could"

"That's not a bad idea, Harrington." Eddie's still smirking "what do you say, sweetheart?"

"I say it's a great idea" I say and the kiss each boy on the cheek.

"And once you're out of here, we're taking you to the most amazing date you can ever imagine" Steve declares with a big loving smile.

"Easy there, Stevie... let's not create expectations we can't live up to" Eddie says making me laugh.

"Even a simple pizza and a movie at home would be absolutely perfect" I assure them.

"See?" Steve points at me looking at Eddie "she has no expectations at all. We're safe"

"Yeah... I guess you're right, man" Eddie agrees.

"C'mon, don't let your uncle wait too long." I say to Eddie kissing him.

"Oh fine fine. I'll leave." He sweetly smile down at me "you better get better soon. I can't deal with this guys here alone"

"Yeah, please, don't leave me with him" Steve begs.

"Oh c'mon, you two will be fine"

"Doesn't matter. Get better soon, we want to spoil you" Steve  softly says, still playing with my fingers.

"I promise" I smile at them.

"Alright, let's get going. I'll prepare the house for the both of you" Steve says and gives me a kiss.

"Fine, I'll meet Wayne and go home to prepare my things instead" it's Eddie's turn to kiss me.

"See you two tomorrow" I wave at them as they exit.

I go sit on the bed taking everything in.

Hopper is alive... I definitely need him to tell me everything. It's so good to know it wasn't one of my hallucinations.

We're gonna be a family again, with El too. I can't believe it, it's great.

Everything is actually going to be fine.

[beatricebidelaire]

When I even hear the word process, I can only think of a terrible afternoon I spent in a windowless room. After writing nine drafts of a screenplay for the Lemony Snicket movie, I’d been fired, and they’d filmed a script written largely by someone else. There were parts of it, after filming, with which the people making the movie were dissatisfied, and so they called me on the last day of a grueling book tour and asked me if, instead of flying home into the arms of my wife, I would fly to them and tell them what was wrong. I said no. They offered a pile of money and I called my wife and she said, darling, just go. I got on an airplane and then into an automobile, and as the automobile approached my ugly destination, my film agent called me and said that my financial offer had been reduced, while I was in the air, to the amount of zero dollars. I went into the building anyway, wondering what I was doing. Inside, the arguing commenced, interspersed by watching rough edits of scenes of the movie—the first I had seen of it—and one of the people in the room, sitting alone on a little sofa, asking if anyone else felt cold. Nobody did, so as we continued to argue, she took cushions off of the sofa, first the decorative ones, and then the structural ones—the ones you lean against, the ones you sit on—and piled them up on her lap and limbs, for presumptive warmth. Eventually only her head was visible on the top of the pile of cushions, the argument continuing all the while. Finally someone just up and told me that I didn’t know what I was talking about, and while I largely agreed with this—then as now, I had no idea how to edit or improve an already-filmed film—I asked why then they had flown me out here to sit in this room. The woman sighed on the sofa. She looked like an igloo, or maybe a ziggurat, with her face at the top where people get sacrificed in offensive adventure movies. I understood then that I was among raving lunatics. Previously I had considered these people innocent, and then maybe dumb, and then maybe a pack of vicious demons. I understood, too, that they were, at least obliquely, the reason I owned a house. But now I saw that to argue with them, to talk with them, to spend time with them, was to spend time with utter, gallivanting, wide-grinned, swerving lunatics, and I was a lunatic, too. It was my own lunatic story they had filmed wrong, and I had entered this windowless room, of my own free will and for no money, to listen to lunatics tell me I was wrong. “Daniel,” this lunatic said to me, head atop the cushions, “you have to trust our process.”

And Then? And Then? What Else?